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March 22, 2008


The Monkey Chronicles Issue 11

Living inside the mind of a Monkey Bumper Issue March 22 2008

Welcome to a special treat, a bumper issue of the Monkey Chronicles. We last seen Duncan in issue 10 receiving medical treatment for the terrible injuries he received whilst driving his truck. His Nurse was very nice, her name was Miss Kitty, and she took very good care of Duncan, he looked very relieved when he left the treatment room of the doctor’s office. Duncan said he wanted to go down to the sea port, now he had recovered he had a friend who was arriving on a ship with a very special cargo, Duncan said that he wanted to meet his friend who was arriving, I really don’t know why. Duncan said he was coming from Spain, he was bringing his new wife that he just married for a new life, right here where I grew up. Well we set off towards the docks, we could see Herman’s ship docking already. Duncan said we must hurry, Herman’s new wife did not speak any English and Herman did not speak any Spanish, hmmm one wonders how they managed to get married in the first place,

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his wife’s name was Martha and he said that he promised to translate for them. Well it really wasn’t long before we seen Herman getting off the boat, but he was not walking, he was riding on the back of his wife Martha. Well my flabber was well and truly ghasted, not only was Herman mistreating his poor new wife, She was an Elephant to boot. Duncan even looked a little surprised but he decided to go and greet Herman anyway. Just as we got there Martha made this huge buttock noise and dropped the biggest, stinkiest pile of steaming hot poop, right onto my head, here is a picture of me right after the unfortunate event. Herman wanted to go straight to Duncan’s house, he said Martha needed to take a shower and freshen up after her long voyage across the sea. Duncan said to follow him to his house so we all set off heading to Duncan’s house. 3|P a ge

I was wondering how Martha was actually going to get into Duncan’s house, here is Duncan’s house. Well once we arrived at the house it was apparent that we were going to have problems getting Martha inside, maybe we should take the wall down and push her in that way. But Duncan and Herman decided that we could all get Martha inside by pushing her really hard through the door. Well it turns out they were right, Martha did eventually get inside the house and here is the photo to prove it. Well poor Duncan, his eyes were popping out of his head at the sight of his house which had collapsed, he had a look of disbelief.

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What were we going to do now, we had nowhere to live and Martha had taken off in search of her fortune, it was just me and Duncan and a huge pile of wood. That is the first time I have seen a grown Man cry, poor Duncan, his house was all smashed down, what could I do, I offered to pick cooties out of his hair, one of his favorite pastimes but he was inconsolable. What could we do to cheer Duncan up? At least we still had Duncan’s car, we should at least go and sit in it and think about where to go. As we got closer to where Duncan’s car was parked we caught site of Martha, she had met up with some Elephant friends and they were having a fun stampede, OH NO! yelled dunce, stop them, but it was too late, poor Duncan’s car had got stampeded by Martha and her elephant buddies. Oh No, poor Duncan, I was at a loss for words, however Duncan was not, his face did resemble a somewhat cloudy picture though.

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Poor Duncan, I think he was mad with Herman, Duncan said he was going to look for Herman and he would be back soon, he told me to fix the car whilst he was gone. I don’t know how to fix cars, so I thought I would go nad look for another one for Duncan, I would be doing him a favor. So I took the bag of money he had left me to look after whilst he went to find Herman and I bought a new car for Duncan, however it was a very fast car, it literally took off when I started driving it, here is a picture of me driving it, great fun, I have never driven a car this fast. Sadly though it landed a bit hard on the ground and it was not as strong as it looked. However I was sure it would still be fine, I mean Duncan would not mind a little scratch or two on his car, I mean it’s nothing really is it.

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I had some difficulty in driving it the rest of the way but I managed to get it there, even though some people were laughing at me. I don’t know why. Anyway I parked it ready for Duncan, he has been so upset lately I was so sure that his new car, which I spent all his money on, was going to cheer him up immensely. You have to admit it’s a really smart looking car. Well I got bored so I thought I would go in search of Duncan, I didn’t want to drive his new car and spoil the surprise for him though. Duncan was last seen heading East, so I set off on my bicycle to look for him. I rode and rode until my legs could pedal no more but then I realized I was lost, I was some place I had never seen before, where I grew up. What was I to do, I must have pedaled for hours, where was I? Oh my what a pickle 7|P a ge

Then I read the sign, I knew instantly where I was, I grew up here. The sad thing was I did not know how to get back to Duncan, he was miles away and I was just too tired to pedal my bicycle for hours again trying to find him. I was sure he would find me though, I left his nice new car for him to drive parked right where he left me, so he would be sure to find it. That’s it for this bumper issue of the Monkey Chronicles, issue 11, I hope you all enjoyed reading it, in the mean time, what should I do next?

Stay put ?

something else?

Start Crying ?

Try to find Duncan ?

See what is in that strange building ?

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The Monkey chronicles - Part 11  
The Monkey chronicles - Part 11  

Living inside the mind of a Monkey - Part 11