MONKEY CHRONICLES 2010 ISSUE 1 JANUARY 2010
Do you remember? Do you remember the story of the Monkey and his friends from 2008 – 2009? Maybe you do, if not there are many episodes available online, starting with the very first issue right here. https://ishare.sphorium.com/fb/link.aspx?id=c9b64d44-
The Monkey
Duncan
Cap Guy
IT’S TIME TO TAKE A LITTLE JOURNEY BACK IN TIME, SO SIT BACK, RELAX AND ENJOY.
There once was a time when everything was fine, everyone was happy, but then along came the Monkey and friends. Since then peace was destroyed and nothing shall ever be the same as it was again. The New Year starts with a new friend, this is Naked Lady. Duncan and Naked Lady met whilst in rehab back in 2009 sometime and quickly fell in love, it was a great relationship until‌. Yes you guessed it, something happened, what was it, you will have to read on to find out. It all began at a party, Duncan wanted Naked Lady to have a bath, since it had been some time and the mould was getting a little unbearable, even for Duncan.
Naked Lady
Naked Lady did not want to of course, she is very proud of herself as you can see, well it was in this period of time that Cap Guy turned up again, remember him?
To cut a long story short, they both eloped to Wet Beaver Creek, Australia, which is where I was bought up. It was there that they both got arrested by the Wet Beaver Police and thrown in Aussie clink, the charges were that Cap Man was seen in public with an offensive Wife. It was time to call his not so best friend Duncan, they needed bailing out and fast. That is where our story begins. Warning, if you are faint of heart or emotionally unstable you should stop reading at this point and destroy the following story, however if you can’t wait to find out what Cap Guy happens next then your adventure is about to begin, sit back, grab some munchies and enjoy. This line left intentionally blank.
Duncan was enjoying a well earned break in Sexmoan (Luzon, Phillipines), where I was bought up, when he got an urgent message from Naked Lady.
Duncan in 1985, Pictured Yesterday
Duncan, it read, please forgive me for I did not know what I was doing, I need your help badly, I am in Jail in Wet Beaver and I need you to get me out, I promise to come back to you and be faithful forever. Well poor Duncan was elated, he missed his stinky smelly wife so much, was he going to help her, of course he is, this is where he enlisted the help of his best friend the Monkey, he called right away. I was in Bastard (Norway) where I was bought up, but as soon as I heard from Duncan I was on my way to see him, he told us that we had to go to Wet Beaver and rescue Naked Lady from Jail. The problem is, how were we going to get there? Oh no problem was Duncan’s attitude, Cap Guy left his bus when he eloped, it is capable of driving here and down under in Australia, a true multipurpose bus made for driving upside down also.
Me wearing my best hat, 1974
Australian Bus, Sometime in the past 3 weeks
Well true to his word, Duncan did have the bus so we set about preparing to go to Wet Beaver. The first thing we needed was our passports, so we set up the printer on Duncan’s computer and printed them out, fantastic, but there was a lot of water in the way between here and Australia, how were we going to overcome that?
All went well until we got to the docks where we had to go through customs; the customs officer there was not very helpful to us.
Mean Customs Officer
You can see by the mean look on his face that he was going to give us a hard time. Sure enough he didn’t believe that Duncan’s passport was real, Stupid Man, of course it was real, He wanted to know where we were going and why? All these questions, and of course “What’s in the Bus” It seemed like we would never get through customs until Duncan showed him a picture of his wife and told him she was in big trouble and we had to go and rescue her. Well the mean officer took one look at the photo, turned a funny green color and ran into the bathroom, leaving us free to pass through and into the docks. The next step was to find a boat that would take us to Australia, we searched and searched and eventually we came across Captain Peashooter, he said he was a World famous Captain and he would attach a barge to the back of his boat and take us to Australia.
We were so lucky, it even had plenty of living quarters and a fantastic sun deck. So we loaded the boat up and off we went. Initially the boat seemed to have some problems getting started, it seemed very slow but Capt. Peashooter told us once the wind got up we would be on our way. Soon we were out in the Ocean, we were enjoying the ride, Duncan was sunning himself
Captain Peashooters Luxury Boat
on the sun deck, when a big wave came and Peashooters boat began to sink. Oh No1 all hands on deck he bellowed, we need to start bailing out, he had about 5 buckets and expected us to help him.
What happened next? Well you will have to wait until the next episode of the Monkey Chronicles to find out. Be sure to check back soon.
REFERENCES Older issues Monkey chronicles part 2 – 3/1/08 https://ishare.sphorium.com/fb/link.aspx?id=c80a6d8e-e5a0-47ac-901b-b5619b658173
Monkey chronicles part 3 https://ishare.sphorium.com/fb/link.aspx?id=a2a3d3af-935f-4ef6-8d53-47574ab6e27c
Monkey Chronicles part 4 https://ishare.sphorium.com/fb/link.aspx?id=5f9e9871-7f64-4f38-967c-539d91064f7d
Monkey chronicles part 5 https://ishare.sphorium.com/fb/link.aspx?id=b765bbdf-f55a-4de5-88d3-09618dfc8989