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DA P LOOKS TOWA RD T H E FU T U RE Innovation & Commitment




STE VE C H ASE H U M A N ITA RIA N AWA RD S In Vogue with En Vogue






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The Standard Magazine PO Box 2074, Palm Springs, CA 92263 760.831.4869 Nino Eilets Publisher Luciano McNulty Editor Maya Kalabic Art Director PHOTOGRAPHER David A. Lee CONTRIBUTORS Jack Bunting, Tom Cross, Mark Dawson, Mona Elyafi, Dann Foley, Chris Heritage, Steven Henke, Jill Langham, Lee Lynch, James Murphy, Mike Saccomanno, Terri Schlichenmeyer & Adam Sinicki EDITORIAL CREDITS :

BrandPoint, Huffington Post, LGBTQ Nation & Project Publicity The Standard Magazine is published monthly. Opinions expressed are not necessarily the opinions of the Standard or its staff, advertisers or readers with exception of editorials. Publication of the name or photograph of any person, business or organization in articles or advertising in the Standard is not to be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of such person, business or organization. The Standard disclaims any responsibility for claims made by advertisers. Advertising rates are subject to change without notice. The Standard reserves the right, at its sole discretion, to reject any advertisement for any reason including, but not limited to poor taste. It is the policy of The Standard that we only publish letters to the editor that are signed by the author and verifiable by phone number. We can reserve the right of anonymity upon request. The letters need to be original, in good taste and free of libel as well as edited for clarity and grammar. Letters are subject to editing by The

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In our work to address the health needs of the most vulnerable in our community, including our core focus on those affected by the HIV epidemic, we had believed for some time that the need for services was greater than the statistics illustrated. In November, Riverside County health officials released new data indicating that a staggering 51 percent more people are living with HIV/AIDS in the county than had been previously reported. The increase was due to a change in the way state health officials collect data on those living with HIV/AIDS, and does not mean there has been a spike in the frequency of the illness, a fivepage report states. The largest increase is within the eastern portion of the county, which includes Palm Springs and the Coachella Valley. Previously, there were 3,252 cases reported for 2016 (the latest figure available) compared to 5,522 in the new calculations for the same period. The numbers changed because public health officials previously could only track the number of people with HIV where they received a diagnosis. The new data analysis includes the movement of people with HIV in and out of Riverside County. The state and county are taking a more thorough approach to measure the number of individuals living with HIV/AIDS here, which is necessary to thwart the spread of the epidemic. While we still do not have a cure or a vaccine, we do have testing and treatment. A GOAL TO END HIV This is why we have adopted the same set of goals that UNAIDS announced in 2017. • By 2020, 90 percent of all people living with HIV will know their HIV status. • By 2020, 90 percent of all people with diagnosed HIV infection will receive sustained antiretroviral therapy.


• By 2020, 90 percent of all people receiving antiretroviral therapy will have viral suppression. A key piece of the 90-90-90 strategy is ensuring that people with HIV/AIDS have access to care and they remain in treatment and stay healthy, so that the virus is suppressed to levels so low that the virus cannot be passed on to others. Better measurement of how many people need services locally means we can deliver more effectively on this promise we made to the community. While condoms and HIV testing continue to be critical to our goal of ending new HIV infections, we now have additional evidence-based strategies that will play equally crucial roles. These include: • Pre Exposure Prophylaxis (PrEP): this one pill a day medication, when taken by an HIV-negative person, will prevent her / him from becoming infected with HIV. Our STD clinic, The Dock is prescribing PrEP and all persons we test for HIV who have any risk are educated about PrEP and linked with our counselors. We launched a targeted media campaign to increase awareness of PrEP among the populations at higher risk for HIV. We are moving to implement same day PrEP so we can prevent new infections quickly. • Post Exposure Prophylaxis (PEP): When taken for 30 days after a risky encounter, PEP can prevent HIV infection, but treatment must start within 72 hours. D.A.P.’s walk-in clinic, The Dock, now provides access to PEP. • Undetectable Equals Untransmittable (U=U): Recently released research proves that HIV-positive individuals who are on HIV treatment and have so little virus in their blood that current tests cannot detect it (called undetectable), are not able to transit HIV. This means our work to link newly diagnosed individuals quickly to HIV care is a critical strategy to end the HIV epidemic.

ADDRESSING A THREAT TO OUR GOAL While we continue to focus on preventing and treating HIV, the hard work we are doing is endangered by additional heath threats facing the same population; namely, Hepatitis C (HCV). As death rates from HIV are going down nationally, death rates from HCV are rising according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). This is especially frustrating given it is preventable and treatable. And since it is passed the same way HIV is, through blood and other bodily fluid exchanges, it targets our clients just like HIV does. It is estimated that as many as 4,000 Coachella Valley residents currently live with chronic HCV. Approximately 3.5 million people in the U.S. have HCV—with somewhere in the range of 40 percent to 85 percent unaware that they are infected. HCV attacks the liver and often has no symptoms. Due to a lack of awareness and testing, many of its victims find out they have it far too late, long after the window for early intervention has closed. The heartbreak is that we have a cure for HCV, and those who have it can still lead happy, healthy lives. But we have to diagnose it early enough to do something about it.

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SOUND FAMILIAR? In June of 2017, we reported back to the community on the results of the three-year, valley-wide Get Tested Coachella Valley campaign (GTCV). Together with more than 100 community partners, we tested more than 80,000 valley residents for HIV and got the nearly 500 people found to be HIV positive into care. Our Get Tested Coachella Valley program gave us methodologies for getting people’s attention, and increasing awareness of HIV. If they are negative, we help them avoid contracting HIV. For others, we help them prevent their HIV positive status from ruining their quality of life and from spreading the virus to others.

Now D.A.P. uses an enhanced version of ultrasound technology, called FibroScan®, painlessly telling our doctors what they need to know without even making a scratch. • Experts in infectious disease: Since becoming a licensed medical clinic in 1992, D.A.P. has grown with the goal of improving the overall health of our entire community, especially the disenfranchised. Our clinic now provides comprehensive, culturally competent, quality medical care including HIV and hepatitis specialty care, along with a range of supportive care services as well as labs and pharmacy under one roof. Our six on-staff physicians, three nurse practitioners, and pharmacy staff who specialize in hepatitis care make all the difference.

So what if we applied the same tactics we regularly use to fight HIV, to prevent deaths and morbidity from HCV? NEW OPTIONS FOR CURING HEPATITIS C We plan to use these same tools to prevent as many deaths and injuries from HCV as possible as we do to combat HIV. We can do this because of advancements in pharmacology, technology, and with a group of medical professionals that have a passion for battling infectious diseases. • New medications: Previous to 2011, HCV treatment required weekly interferon injections for about 12 months. The side effects could be pretty severe and often failed to clear the virus. Now direct-acting antiviral agents (DAAs) selectively target and cure HCV. For most patients with HCV the treatment is as easy as taking vitamins for just six-to-12 weeks with little to no side effects. • New testing equipment: Until recently, the only way to accurately measure how much the HCV had advanced was to perform a biopsy on the patient’s liver, requiring an incision in the abdomen.

While we may be challenged throughout this coming year by legislative decisions made in Washington, D.C., D.A.P. will continue to press forward with the same passion we have had for ending this epidemic. It has fueled our insistence on innovation these past 33 years. We will continue pushing ourselves to look for ways to bolster the health of everyone in our community. D.A.P. does not have time to rest.

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Come see our new larger Palm Springs location! PALM SPRINGS

745 N. Palm Canyon, Palm Springs, CA 760.322.3400 •



8443 Melrose Ave, West Hollywood, CA • 323.424.3005






Co-chairs Patrick Jordan and Lauri Kibby will join Senator Barbara Boxer on February 10 when they welcome more than 1,500 D.A.P. supporters at the 2018 Steve Chase Humanitarian Awards benefitting Desert AIDS Project. The party begins with red carpet arrivals at the Palm Springs Convention Center at 5:30pm. Now in its 24th year, the Steve Chase Humanitarian Awards gala has raised millions of dollars to care for people living with HIV. First organized by and named for famed interior designer Steve Chase – a former D.A.P. donor, volunteer, and board member – the gala is a highlight of the desert social season and pre-ceded the night prior by an exclusive VIP pre-party honoring major donors and celebrity guests. “Your compassionate support empowers Desert AIDS Project to think globally and act locally,” said David Brinkman, CEO. “By joining us at the Steve Chase, you join us in our commitment to 90-90-90, the ambitious treatment target to help end the AIDS epidemic.” According to the Join United Nations Programme on HIV/AIDS (UNAIDS) many strategies will be needed to close the book on the AIDS epidemic, and one thing is certain. It will be impossible to end the epidemic without bringing HIV treatment to all who need it. By 2020,



the goal is that 90 percent of all people who have HIV / AIDS know their status, are on treatment, and will have viral suppression. Palm Springs Life Magazine had this to say about last year’s gala: “The Chase has a reputation among trendsetters as one of the few gala events where attendees are encouraged to have fun and take risks with fashion … and the guests did not disappoint. Black sequins and Mr. Turk dinner jackets were de rigueur for many men, as were well-fitted and accessorized tuxedos (which held their own alongside long gowns and sexy short dresses).” Ross Mathews will host this year’s Steve Chase Humanitarian Awards. Mathews has established himself as one of the most indemand television personalities hosts and pop culture experts in the entertainment arena today. Mathews can be seen as a judge on the smash hit LOGO series “RuPaul’s Drag Race”. Mathews is also a fixture on “E! News” and E! Network’s live red carpet awards show coverage year round. Chief Development Officer, Darrell Tucci is excited about this year’s entertainment. “I think we’re going to see a room full of friends singing along to the hits of headline entertainment En Vogue.”

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The group has never been afraid to break the mold and step ‘outside’ the norm. From “Free Your Mind” to “My Lovin”, they have been trendsetters in music and style. Today, affectionately known as the “original funky divas”, they are redefining the idea of beauty and what it means, beyond the traditional sense, with their distinctive fusion of music and style. Contrary to popular belief, En Vogue has never disbanded. As true music veterans who have withstood ever-changing music industry fads and trends, the group continues to record and perform worldwide with original members Cindy Herron-Braggs, Terry Ellis, and newest member, Rhona Bennett. Attendees of The Chase know to pace themselves during the evening so they have energy left for its famous after-party, which will feature a DJ, a performance by Thelma Houston, and a series of tightly guarded surprises revealed as guests dance the night away in a lounge created inside the Palm Springs Convention Center. Guests of the after party can expect her signature blend of high- energy dance

classics and soulful ballads. Thelma Houston may be best known for the worldwide success of her disco anthem “Don’t Leave Me This Way”, but her support of AIDS Services organizations is also legendary. She is known for her dedication to humanitarian causes, including tireless efforts in the battle against AIDS and deep commitments to the Human Rights Campaign (HRC). To reserve your place at the party for the 24th Annual Steve Chase Humanitarian Awards, go to https://stevechasehumanitarianawards2018. or call 760-992-0445.


IF YOU GO Date: Saturday, February 10, 2018 Location: Palm Springs Convention Center Red Carpet Arrivals: 5:30pm Dinner, Awards & Entertainment: 7:00pm After Party: 9:30pm Attire: Black Tie or Creative Formal Attire


This year we celebrate the 27th annual Steve Chase Awards here in Palm Springs. The event has grown into one of the largest fund raising evenings in the valley and has become an A-list party every season. I will let others tell you how much money has been raised and how many deserving people are honored. I want to take a different look, one from a designer’s perspective. Many attendees know the name but, I find that at this point, many do not know who Steve was or what impact he had on, not only the DAP and Palm Springs but, they do not know how vast his impact on design and style were during his career and lifetime. The broader picture is easy to relate. Steve gave of his time and money to some of the deserts biggest projects including the Palm Springs Desert Museum, The Living Desert, The McCallum Theatre and most notably, The Desert Aids Project (DAP). In fact, Steve helped to coordinate the very first fundraiser. It wasn’t the huge, professionally produced event it is now. Steve made calls to his A List clients to ensure a turnout of influential celebrities and philanthropists. The fundraiser became The Steve Chase Awards the year after Steve’s death from AIDs-related complications in 1994. His legacy is tied directly to the millions and millions of dollars that have been raised


by him and in his name. His legacy began in the arena of design and his influence remains strong even today, decades after his passing. As your resident designer I want to share with you, the dear readers of The Standard Magazine, is how Steve influenced and changed the face of design in the desert and across the globe. Also how he influenced me as a young, up & coming designer then and as a seasoned design professional today. The “Desert Style” that we dwellers admire and emulate even today was first envisioned and conceived by Steve Chase. There are elements in his original style that remain current today and others that after this many years are making a strong comeback. Like most of us, Steve Chase was a transplant to the desert. In his case, he came from New Hampshire but was raised in Southern California. He fell in love with the desert and made it his home and the base for his global design business. He created a totally new look that was unique to our Valley. There are many elements to the look but I believe I am safe in saying that overall the look was contemporary, grand, sophisticated and uniquely southern California. His statements were bold pieces of art and sculpture, scale, texture, rich materials and his signature style of over-scaled upholstery. The latter is probably the most recognizable element of a Steve Chase project.

Before this time, contemporary upholstery was single style, mostly tight, hard edged and not what one would call, comfortable. Steve’s signature upholstery was big, deep and sumptuous. There was even what came to be known as the Steve Chase Throw Pillow, it was bigger, over-stuffed with down and rounded on its corners and the “pillow chop” as every devotee and DIY enthusiast of design knows became part of the signature look of Steve’s upholstery. Another element of that upholstery was Steve’s use of tight seats and backs. That means there is no loose seat or separate back cushion. Traditionally, that type of seating is not the most comfortable. Steve Chase changed all of that! Through a combination of seat depth, construction, fill and fabric, his tight-seated upholstery was incredibly comfortable and highly stylish. Many pieces had wide channeling that added to the look and comfort level. The finishing touch, as I mentioned earlier, was the big over-stuffed throw pillow, also a Steve Chase signature. What we now know as the “flat roof California contemporary” style of architecture was also a Steve Chase influenced product. His homes were the first open-plan that we now know as the great room. He loved light and levels and skylights. He used lots of natural tones that created rich interiors that were never bland. He used exotic art and especially sculpture from Asia and Africa to create drama. The Steve Chase influence has also helped me in my design firm, not so much in the design style(s) in which we work but in the way he ran his business. He believed as I do that “everyone can buy everything.” We both also believe that the “art is how well those things are assembled, how the total look turns out.” He and I also believe that the only way to present a new home/space to a client is by forcing them out of their own home to do the installation and then inviting them back and welcoming them to cocktails in their new home. At the end of the day we are offering our creative abilities

as a service to our clients. That is what they are paying for and they deserve the royal treatment. I still work with clients today in the desert who bought “Steve Chase houses”. Though some of the more dated aspects of the design, such as loads of smoked mirror may be a bit passé today, everything old is new again. Times change and design styles come back around. Today, I am finding a renewed interest in everything Steve Chase Style. His now “vintage” upholstery is sought after once again. His exotic mix of art and sculpture is once again chic. So you see, Steve Chase is more than a name on the step-andrepeat. He was more than a man who gave his time and money to the DAP and other desert organizations. He created a business a style and a persona that brought people together in private and public spaces of his creation. He taught us all how to live better lives in the same way I try to do today. He was an inspiration both professionally and personally and for these reasons and many others, he lives on through the Steve Chase Humanitarian Awards. Congratulations to all of the honorees and to all those who will benefit from the monies raised in his name. Live Well!

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Desert spiriT















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The great American road trip is about to get a whole lot gayer. Kit Williamson’s two-time Emmy-nominated LGBT series, EASTSIDERS, returns for a six-episode third season this month. Executive produced by Williamson and his husband John Halbach, and made possible via a Kickstarter campaign that raised over $80,000 from fans, the third season of EASTSIDERS picks up on Cal and Thom who, despite some confusing developments in their newly monogom-ish relationship, are determined to make things work. After a challenging year in New York City, the guys hit the road back west to Los Angeles to pick up the pieces of their old life, however, nothing can prepare them for the unexpected twists and turns they’ll face on the journey home. As they travel west, their tumultuous relationship is tested by an empty bank account, arguments about the future, and an encounter with a handsome drifter that tempts them to once again redraw the map of their relationship. Will this be the trip of their lives, or the end of the road for Cal and Thom? Shot on location in New York, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Iowa, South Dakota, Wyoming, Montana, Idaho, Oregon, Nevada and California, season three of EASTSIDERS stars Kit Williamson as Cal and four-time Emmy Nominee Van Hansis (As the World Turns) as Thom. It also features guest star appearances by Constance Wu (ABC’s Fresh Off The Boat), Stephen Guarino (I’m Dying Up Here), Wilson Cruz (Star Trek Discovery), Brianna Brown (The CW’s upcoming series Dynasty), Matt McKelligon (You’re Killing Me), Colby Keller (High Maintenance), Willam Belli (Rupaul’s Drag Race) and social media superstar Max Emerson. “It’s a difficult time to be LGBT in America right now, and I wanted to stick a rainbow flag in the tradition of the Great American Road Trip,” says Williamson. “LGBT people have the same claim to the beautiful sights of this country as everyone else. By shooting with a skeleton crew we were able to take the characters out of their comfort zone in a way that few television shows have been able to.” The first two seasons of EASTSIDERS are available worldwide on Netflix, where they have been translated into a dozen languages.

They are also available on DVD and digital platforms through Wolfe Video. EASTSIDERS Season 3 is available worldwide now on and Vimeo, as well as through various streaming services including Amazon Video, Google Play and iTunes. View the trailer now at For more information, visit

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Luncheonette. Darn it all, I just found the word I was looking for back in 2007 when I set a scene in a coffee shop in New York. It wasn’t a coffee shop it was a luncheonette. In that era, you could use the term coffee shop, but a reader might picture a Greenwich Village or a North Beach San Francisco dive that served espresso to long-haired women and men in berets. In my novel Beggar of Love, I wanted to evoke elbows on the counter, ham sandwiches and steaming cups of Joe. Telling my sweetheart about this, she popped out with, “My Beautiful Luncheonette.” We laughed, because of the 1985 gay male film “My Beautiful Launderette.” I immediately thought I could write a short story about a luncheonette, but I don’t have enough time left to write a story about every word I fall in love with, not to mention I already wrote Dusty’s Queen of Hearts Diner. We had another laugh over the thought that, while I regret not meeting my sweetheart thirty years earlier, I really, really regret not using the word luncheonette. If you’re a writer, you know what torment


it is for that one perfect word to escape you. Working on Rainbow Gap, I needed genuine Southern slang in the worst way, because some of the characters had ancestors in Florida or Southern Georgia going back generations. For me, words are fun to research. I’ve been collecting slang for decades and have my expressions, idioms, and colloquialisms stored on hundreds of index cards, which I review when I’m stuck. There are times when a word flashes into my mind. The other day it was “midriff.” I asked my sweetheart when she’d last used the word. It was popular, in my memory, in the 1950s. Oh, boy, I said, I can’t wait to use that word. I pictured a character with a bared, tattooed and pierced midriff. I had to ask where, exactly, did a midriff start and end? Both of us guessed at the answer. I asked our brand-new Google Home Mini for synonyms and she came up with: stomach, belly, and midsection. offered: belly, gut, and midsection. In my mind, it’s the band of bare flesh between a 1949 halter-top and the waistband of a woman’s wide flappy

shorts. Men don’t have midriffs as far as I’m concerned. Then, I was cursed with the image of an old step van, in a dark color, adorned with the script, “The Midriff Brothers.” That got us started amusing ourselves all over again. My sweetheart wouldn’t budge from the idea of The Midriff Brothers Bakery. An old firm, they used to deliver bread and other baked goods in their step van. And the business slogan my sweetheart supplied? “Filling Midriffs for Three Hundred Years.” See why I love this woman? My favorites are the out of favor words and phrases. A neighbor asked how I was doing and I think I had an out of body experience. I replied, “Fair to middlin’.” These things just jump out of my mouth. I had never before used that expression. Then the neighbor, apropos of this, said, “Flibbertigibbet. Now there’s a word you don’t hear.” For the most part, this particular neighbor keeps herself to herself, another old saying meaning she’s a very private person. Speaking of her, when you come from a heavily Irish family like I do, your “old mither” would have dinner on the table in “two shakes of a lamb’s tail.” After telling someone off, she’d say, “Put that in your pipe and smoke it.” I was a little dickens when I pulled a prank. I still describe an overly attached person as glomming onto someone or something. And I love how the word slumgullion feels in my mouth, though I don’t think I’d like the inferior stew. Here are lesbian words I’ve admired since adolescence. Carson McCullers started Member of the Wedding with this first line: “It happened that green and crazy summer when Frankie was twelve years old.” Willa Cather’s My Antonia took place here: “The dwelling-houses were set about haphazard on the tough prairie sod; some of them looked as if they had been moved in overnight, and others as if they were straying off by themselves, headed straight for the open plain.” Radclyffe Hall wrote of reading: “Sir Phillip and his daughter had a new common interest; they could now discuss books and the making of books and the feel and the smell and the essence of books—a mighty bond, this, and one full of enchantment.” And today Mary Oliver never disappoints me. These are my favorite line from “Wild Geese:” “You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.” Oliver creates miracles of words. Meanwhile, those Midriff Brothers served their goods piping hot from their bakehouse. Their customers were always tickled pink. If something burned they’d have a cow. I regret every scrumptious word and historied phrase I’ll never get to use.

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Amanda Lepore’s “Buckle Up” is flirty and playful song, with a burlesque, retro-pop swing. It is the first single from her soonto-be-released LEPORE Ep and the first original solo release from the world’s mega-famous transsexual since “I…Amanda Lepore,” her acclaimed 2011 album debut that featured the smash hits, “My Hair Looks Fierce,” “Champagne,” “Turn Me Over” and “My Pussy.” “My goal with ‘Buckle Up’ is to whip naughty boys and girls around and leave ‘em asking the questions they don’t want their mothers knowing the answers to,” coos Lepore. “The song is sexy, bubbly, and takes on the night like me. “And just as I am easy on the eyes, ‘Buckle Up’ is easy on the ears,” she adds. “Buckle Up” was written and produced by RedTop (“Convertible”), Knifekick, Ted Ottaviano, DJ Angelo “Pepe,” indie-pop ingenue Megan Vice and Lepore’s long-time musical collaborator, Bill Coleman. It is being distributed by Peace Bisquit and is available for download now by pre-ordering LEPORE, releasing February 2018. “Amanda is a woman who unapologetically owns her sexuality and is never afraid to flaunt what she’s got,” explains writer Megan Vice. “I had that in mind when I first began putting pen to paper. I wanted the listener to get a sense for how that tough broad managed to carve out her own path to greatness despite all of life’s roadblocks. These days, it’s Amanda’s way or the highway, as it should be because she’s earned it.” During the song’s creation, the team knew they could not simply duplicate the achievements of the “I…Amanda Lepore” album. In order to capture Amanda’s million-watt personality in song, ”We concentrated on figuring out the perfect equation that paired a sweet hook with a bouncy groove, to really showcase Amanda‘s devilish side,” says Knifekick. Their aim was to marry Amanda’s love of Hollywood glamour and vintage bombshells with kick-up-your-Louboutins humor and a showgirls-worthy groove. They needed just the right amount of camp that would compliment the canon of classics Amanda performs in her nightclub shows.

“We think we nailed it in ‘Buckle Up,’” says an enthusiastic Coleman. “We’re excited for fans to hear the next evolution of music from the hardest working gal in nightlife.” The official audio video montage clip, edited by Scott J. Heller, features exclusive Amanda Lepore portraits by the likes of David LaChapelle, Vijat Mohindra, Josef Jasso, Karl Giant, Marco Ovando, Alvaro Villarrubia and more. The clip also includes many of Amanda’s personal favorite images through the years, selected for her cherished memoir and coffee table book, Doll Parts. It’s available now on Youtube. For more information, visit Follow Amanda Lepore on Facebook @ AmandaLeporeFans, Instagram @ AmandaLepore and Twitter @ Amanda_Lepore.

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Always Be Yourself. Pretty much since grade school, that’s what you’ve been told. Take a breath and you do you. People like you the way you are. You don’t have to try to be someone you’re not. Always be yourself – although, as you‘ll see in “True Sex” by Emily Skidmore, that may’ve caused gossip a century ago. In 1902, women in the United States could not legally vote. Many couldn’t hold property or get credit, and joining the military was likewise forbidden. None of that was a concern to Harry Gorman, though: well travelled, adventuresome, and married, Gorman lived in Buffalo, New York, where he was known as a good man. Except he wasn’t. Gorman was anatomically a woman. Surely, that came as a surprise to doctors, jailers, and undertakers who discovered the secrets of Gorman and men like him but here, Skidmore says that the opposite is true of everyday folks: as evidenced by articles in many small-town newspapers, locals often knew the “true sex” of trans men in their midst and didn’t seem to much care. Many trans men in the late 1800s and early 1900s, says Skidmore, married, perhaps to cement their appearance as “‘good men’ to their communities.” Once discovered, they were often known in the press as “female husbands” because the term “lesbians” hadn’t taken hold yet and, at that time, women were largely believed to be asexual or unable to be passionate. Even so, though titillated, small-town Americans then weren’t quite as naïve as we might think they were. Perhaps because the science of sexology was still in its infancy and words were lacking, many of the men explained their actions as a way to make a living, or because it was more comfortable to dress and live as a man. Some didn’t explain at all, while others said they lived as men to take advantage of the rights men had, and continued in order to avoid embarrassment for their new wives. In many cases that Skidmore found, those reasons were no matter to neighbors. But intolerance was never far away… When one considers the attitudes toward LGBT individuals, pre-Stonewall; it’s quite eye-opening to know that tolerance was practiced well before discrimination was. It gives you more respect for your elders - and yet, as you’ll see in “True Sex,” laissez faire attitudes weren’t widespread. Using the tales of many trans men, as garnered from newspaper accounts of the day, author Emily Skidmore shows how small-town residents around the turn of the last century viewed trans men and,

at the same time, women who loved women. Not only are those stories fascinating, but they contain a certain quaintness that belies what’s between the lines: the newspapers had a lot to say, but there was an equal amount that they didn’t say but that readers, Skidmore believes, surely implicitly understood. This book veers off into the scholarly now and then; even so, it’s readable by anyone who’s interested in this history. If that’s you, “True Sex” is a book you’ll want for yourself. “True Sex: The Lives of Trans Men at the Turn of the 20th Century” by Emily Skidmore c.2017, New York University Press $27.00 / higher in Canada 253 pages

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Here TV, the nation’s largest LGBTQ premium television network, and Pride Media, the nation’s largest premium LGBTQ publisher, launched their original series, Falling For Angels, on December 1. Country Star Steve Grand, “Mean Girls” star Daniel Franzese & “Desperate Housewives” alum Alec Mapa lead the cast. The series takes a provocative and informative look at samesex relationships from love and sex positivity to sexual health, heartbreak and more. Inspired by six distinct neighborhoods in Los Angeles, including Boyle Heights, Koreatown, Leimert Park, Bel Air, Silver Lake and Malibu, the anthology series features an all-star cast including Steve Grand (Country Singer), Daniel Franzese (Looking/Mean Girls), Alec Mapa (Devious Maids), Kevin Spirtas (Days of Our Lives), Blake Young-Fountain (The Skinny), Johnny Kostrey (Aquarius), Calpernia Addams (Soldier’s Girl), Adrian Nunez (30 Days with my Brother),


Jason London (Dazed and Confused) and more. “Falling for Angels celebrates the magic that makes Los Angeles the city of angels.” says Award-winning Producer Paul Colichman (Gods and Monsters/Shelter). “Here TV has engaged inspiring and diverse queer writers and directors, most of whom are queer men of color, to tell their stories. Each episode features a romance apropos to a specific Los Angeles neighborhood. Falling For Angels highlights the emotions and complex relationships that bind the queer community together.” Producing alongside Colichman is Emmy-nominated actorproducer, David Millbern. Each installment of the six-episode anthology series is helmed by a different writer/director, including Nick Oceano (Boyle Heights), Steven Liang and Steven J. Kung (Koreatown), Waymon Boone

(Leimert Park), David Millbern (Bel Air), Billy Clift (Silver Lake). Each writer/director has a personal connection to each distinct LA neighborhood - they each share a real-life tie to the neighborhood they inhabit, providing authenticity to themes of race, gentrification, sexual health, love and sexuality. Clift and Millbern also wrote and directed Malibu, the final episode in the series. Each writer and director shares a real-life connection to the neighborhood they inhabit, providing authenticity to themes of race, gentrification, sexual health, love and sexuality. Falling For Angels can be viewed for free on Here TV app:, available for download via Apple, Google Play, Roku and Amazon App Store, Here TV’s cable providers and on the website: where each episode will stream for free.

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DOHC wins national recognition for helping reduce heart attacks and strokes. They were chosen from 310 physician practices and health systems to receive the inaugural Target: BP Award. More than 103 million Americans have high blood pressure, with only half of them controlling it to a healthy level. The Target: BP recognition program was established as a national joint initiative between the American Heart Association and the American Medical Association and joined by more than 1,100 physician practices and health systems. To help them achieve their goals, Target: BP provided all participants with a dedicated website featuring free evidencebased improvement programs that included tools and resources to help clinicians improve blood pressure control rates.

“We’re pleased to win this award because helping our members and our employees live a heart-healthy life is an everyday commitment at DOHC, said Marc Hoffing, Medical Director for Desert Oasis Healthcare. “In fact, we’ve already paid the event registration fee for dozens of our employees who plan on walk or run in the Palm Springs Health Run & Fitness Expo on January 27 and Team DOHC’s captain is cardiologist Dr. Alice Perlowski” Dr. Perolowski, who is a veteran of more than 50 marathons, encouraged DOHC employees by saying, “Whether you run or walk, the only thing that matters is that your heart finishes first” To learn more about or to get involved with the American Heart Association, call 1-800-AHA-USA1 or visit

JANUARY 2018 29



Bears are coming out of hibernation and are heading to the International Bear Convergence (IBC), the premier winter event for Bears & admirers in Palm Springs, California. The event will take place on February 8-12, 2018. This desert oasis opens its arms and welcomes you back to the hip Hard Rock Hotel Palm Springs to thousands of frisky, furry bears, their friends & their fans.


The four-day event will come to life with DJs, live entertainment and thousands of bears from around the globe. The last four years were hugely successful and expect more of the same in 2018 with record-breaking attendance. “This year, being our 5th, we will be pulling all the stops so expect us to mix it up a bit” adds co-producers Nino Eilets & George Frank.


During the day kick back like a rock star and enjoy themed pool parties with music provided by world renown DJ’s at the fabulous Hard Rock pool. With multiple bars, cabanas, outdoor-lounge areas and our new sun deck area overlooking the action at the pool, you’re destined to have a fantastic day. After the sun goes down, evenings will heat up with three high-energy dance parties. Saturday’s main dance event, Divas & Bears, will feature a live performance by the iconic Diva of all Divas, superstar Martha Wash. Added this year, Modern Bear will be presenting Populart; a popup art show highlighting well known artists including Joe Dietl cast member from the web series Where the Bears Are. Bear World TV will be on hand and filming the event for their upcoming series so make sure you are ready for your close-up. Plus several surprises through out the weekend. So don’t wait; the first host hotel is sold out and currently has a waiting list. Attendance

was over 2500 last year and is expected to grow exponentially in 2018. IBC will again take over Palm Springs! Passes are still available on line and if you miss the deadline you may still purchase passes at the hotel. You can also buy tickets for individual events the day or evening of the event at the door. Go to for more information. Forget shoveling snow and get out of the cold and plan on hanging with the guys in Palm Springs, CA in February for IBC 2018! You know you want to!

JANUARY 2018 31



For the roughly 75 million Americans who make up the baby boom generation, a healthy diet and lifestyle are the best weapons against age-related diseases. “It’s vital at any age to adopt good habits to live a strong, fit and healthy life,” says Dr. Mike Roussell, a nationally recognized nutrition consultant and nutrition adviser to Men’s Health and Shape. “Fueling your life with tasty and nutrientrich foods while making sure to be active every single day are essential components to keeping your body young and vibrant.” Roussell’s recommendation? Nuts. In particular, pistachios. “Pistachios are a multitasking nut with fiber, healthy fats, and three specific types of antioxidants that may help fight the onset of age-related conditions that lead to poor health in these 10 ways.” Heart health - Large population studies show that people who regularly eat nuts, such as pistachios, have a lower risk of dying from heart disease or suffering a heart attack. Pistachios provide 360-degree cardiovascular support in that they can promote improvements in cholesterol levels, blood pressure and blood vessel function. Anti-inflammatory - Excessive inflammation is one of the root causes of age-related conditions, such as arthritis. Pistachios contain a special form of vitamin E called gamma tocopherol, which has unique anti-inflammatory properties. Gamma tocopherol levels have also been shown to decrease as we age. Weight loss - Being overweight can also contribute to a number of age-related illnesses. Studies show pistachios positively promote weight maintenance as the dietary fiber, fat and protein all work together to make us feel fuller and satiated longer, plus removing them from the shell slows down eating. Pistachios are also the lowestfat nuts. Digestion - The fiber in pistachios also can help with digestion. Research shows that the fiber in pistachios works as a prebiotic and feeds the good bacteria in our digestive tract to improve the health of our digestive system. A single serving of pistachios contains as much as 3 grams of dietary fiber.


Blood glucose level - Developing adult onset diabetes, or Type 2 diabetes, is a common fear for boomers. The American Diabetes Association praises the health benefits of nuts, including pistachios, calling them a diabetes superfood because they improve how the body’s cells use glucose and how insulin responds to a carbohydratecontaining meal, namely, stabilizing blood glucose levels. Skin health and appearance - UV light from the sun promotes damage and accelerates the aging of our skin. Pistachios contain two carotenoid antioxidants that are concentrated in the skin and work to filter out and protect it against the damaging effects of UV light. Eyesight - Pistachios contain lutein, a nutrient known to help improve eye health, especially in older individuals. Lutein has been shown to prevent and slow down macular degeneration by providing more pigment for the eye, thereby reflecting more of the sun’s light, preventing damage to the retina. Memory - Preliminary research shows that the fatty acids and antioxidants found in pistachios can help support brain health. The antioxidants in pistachios can help ward off excessive inflammation in the brain, a major cause of accelerated cognitive decline. Another study found that eating pistachios stimulated brain waves that aid the formation of ideas and memory processing. Sleep - Nuts, including pistachios, are rich in minerals such as magnesium. One benefit of magnesium is that it may aid sleep because it assists in helping the muscles relax and quiet activity in the brain by working as an inhibitory neurotransmitter. Energy - Pistachios have been shown to promote energy, which is why so many professional athletes consume them while training. More energy means we’ll commit to getting enough exercise. But what is Dr. Mike’s main reason for having his clients eat pistachios? “They taste good. People are much more likely to stick to a healthy diet when the food is tasty and fun to eat.”

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JANUARY 2018 33




Here’s hoping you all had a safe and Happy Holiday Season as well as a very Happy New Year. It’s hard to believe that we are 18 years into the new millennium. It seems like it was almost yesterday that we were just 10 years into and now we are almost at 20! Where does the time go? This year I will turn 63 years old. A number of years ago we learned that our bodies and our cells regenerate at least one time during any seven-year period. If that is so, I will be approaching the ninth set of my seven-year regeneration period. I’ve chosen to believe this information and have subsequently attempted to do the best I could during the last 2 cycles. The first set of seven which took place at age 49 proved to be miraculous if I do say so myself. I saw changes in me that appeared to make me look younger than I had for years. And for the record it was not due to any surgical procedures or dermatologic fillers, but instead from healing myself in Body, Mind and Spirit. I was healing myself from the inside out and it evidently showed based on the comments and compliments that were lovingly sent my way by the community at large. I was happy on the inside and it showed. But, if I’m being completely honest, I feel that I have aged more in the last 2 years than ever before. And no, I’m not fishing for compliments. Instead, I have seen certain signs of aging that have surprised me. So, I asked myself why and wondered what had changed. Was I as happy as I had been? Was I taking care of myself differently? Was I working out as often and as rigorously as I had been? Was I eating different foods or drinking different kinds of water or liquids? Had I been drinking more alcohol, which we know ages us prematurely? Was I dancing as frequently? Was I going out into the sun more? Or, more simply stated, was I just getting older and seeing what was actually inevitable according to those who came before me?

So, I decided that I was going to spend the month of December abstaining from alcohol and would re-commit to eating 6 meals a day, 7 days a week. Further, I was going to commit to exercising at least 3 days a week and would do 45 minutes of cardio 5 days a week. My intention was high and outside of 4 drinks in December, I stuck to my guns. I know it might seems like an odd time to be so strict, but I felt that it was actually the best time because most of us use the holidays as an excuse to gain the 7-10 pounds, the number the experts claim we gain between Halloween and New Years Day! Findings report that it takes as much as 5 months to get the holiday weight off and I really did not want to go into 2018 with that hanging over my head or my belt. So, I dove in feet first and look forward to being in better shape as I approach my 63rd birthday. I pray that all my cells will be happier as they regenerate in a calmer, less stressed out version of me and will appear younger and more glowing. Let’s see how I fare! I’m hoping that you might want to join me in my pursuit of Youthanization! Here’s to you and your health!

I had to admit to myself that I had been under more stress in the last year and truly had not been as happy as I had been in the past. I was working out less rigorously and was doing less cardio and was dancing less. I had also been drinking more alcohol. Wow, what was happening to me and why?


JANUARY 2018 35



Sometimes the best ways to improve your health and fitness are not the most intense or the most tiring workouts. Often in fact, these intensive forms of training can go overboard and end up causing damage if you’re someone with health problems or facing advanced years. Then there’s the fact that intensive exercise requires a lot of time and energy which we don’t always have available to us. Sometimes ‘little and often’ is better and certainly less taxing. Walking. This is perhaps the most basic form of exercise available. It’s something that mostly everyone can do, that’s low impact and that’s entirely pleasant. And as it happens it has immense health benefits once you start making a proper habit of it. Introducing Walking to Your Routine All of us walk from time to time already. Chances are you will walk at least some of the way on your journey to work (even if it’s just to the tube station) and you’re also likely to walk on occasion when you visit the shops or when you’re looking for a way to pass the time for an afternoon. But to get the full health benefits of walking you need to do it regularly and with purpose. Even if you only walk for fifteen minutes


a day you’ll see marked improvements in your overall health but the more you can get the more pronounced the benefits will be. The good news is that there are plenty of ways you can easily introduce this kind of walking into your routine too – park a little way away from the shops, get off one stop early when you ride the bus home from work, or just wake up fifteen minutes earlier and have a morning stroll while it’s nice and quiet. These are simple changes that will bring you great health benefits. And what benefits they are… Here are just a few to hopefully pique your interest in walking… Health Benefits of Walking FITNESS: Walking might not be anywhere near as intensive as jogging but it can still have a very good impact on your health if you walk far enough, often enough and fast enough. Studies show that regularly walking can help to lower your chances of heart disease or stroke, can decrease bad (LDL) cholesterol and boost the good cholesterol. It can also help you to lose weight and to improve your overall fitness by burning energy and increasing your heart rate. Unlike some other forms of cardiovascular exercise however,

walking does not place too much strain on your body. It’s unlikely to trigger any kind of attach, it doesn’t jar your knees or lead to shin splints and it’s unlikely to lead to injury. CREATIVITY: Walking has been demonstrated to help encourage creative thinking and to promote the generation of good ideas. This has been shown in a number of studies and in one it was shown that even being pushed in a wheelchair through a scenic park would be less beneficial for your creative juices than walking on a treadmill in front of a blank wall. In other words, these experiments demonstrate that it really is the actual act of walking that boosts this creativity and not the scenery (though other studies have shown that nice scenery can do that too!). Walking has other cognitive benefits too and some studies have shown that it can help to prevent dementia. This is true of any physical activity and it turns out that regular walking (six miles a week plus) is sufficient to tap into those benefits. MOOD: Walking is great for your mood resulting in the release of mood boosting hormones and neurotransmitters such as serotonin and dopamine similar to running. At the same time you will also find your mood improves from being outdoors, particularly thanks to the sun. This is a good way to combat ‘SAD’ or ‘Seasonal Affective Disorder’ as the nights start getting longer. BONE HEALTH: Just as the sun can do wonders for your mood, so too can it help to strengthen your bones. That’s because sunlight stimulates our body to produce more vitamin D which in turn regulates the absorption of calcium and phosphorous. Further to this, walking also helps to prevent osteoporosis because it is a ‘weight bearing activity’. In other words, it places pressure on our bones which stimulates them to increase their density. This is particularly important as you get older and your bones are liable to becoming more brittle. TONING: Just as walking is sufficient to provide a basic cardio workout, it’s also enough to give you some basic muscle toning benefits. The areas that stand to benefit most are the legs, butt and abs and especially if you decide to take a hike uphill. On top of these areas though, walking is also useful for toning your arms and shoulders as these move too during your strolls. Take a look at the shoulders of Usain Bolt and you’ll see just what the piston motion of the arms can do for you – though you’ll see a much smaller change from lightly walking compared with Usain Bolt! So there you have it, there are plenty of great reasons to go for a regular stroll and when you weigh the small amount of effort against the huge number of rewards it’s hard for anyone to make a case against walking. What’s your excuse?

JANUARY 2018 37



In my practice, I collect lots of facts and bits of information that may be interesting or helpful to people. Here are a few that I’d like to pass along to you. HOA and Time-share Woes - Joint ventures like membership in a homeowner’s association or a time-share property can be distressing if everything doesn’t go smoothly. California laws strictly regulate HOA’s, but sometimes boards of directors and individual homeowners choose not to follow the rules. You can bring the boards back to reality – by voting them out at the next election, or by filing a lawsuit, if necessary. And errant homeowners can be hit where it hurts – in the pocketbook – through fines or putting liens on their property to recover unpaid dues and other fees. Sadly, some members violate rules not through choice, but because of serious financial problems. If you own a house in foreclosure or pending a short sale, you must continue to pay the homeowner assessments until the lender or new buyer actually takes possession of the property. Even if you have filed bankruptcy, the dues must be paid, and you must fully maintain the property (lighting, irrigation, yard maintenance, insurance) until you no longer officially own it. Time-shares are awfully attractive when you first meet them, but often become dead weight after a few years of ownership. They look like a good deal going in, but can cost a bundle to get out of. It is really hard to find buyers for many time-shares, and the alternative that some folks suggest – just stop paying for it - can get you into a lot of trouble. Even if you have fully paid for the unit, the maintenance fees and penalties will continue to stack up, and you are likely to face a court order to pay, which will take a big bite out of your budget and your credit score. Those Pesky Robocalls - In spite of stricter laws, telemarketers and scammers continue to increase their assault on our telephones. What can you do to protect yourself? The Do Not Call registry is still the basic barrier to most legitimate telemarketers. Call 888-382-


1222 from the phone you want to register; or go to and register your number(s). What about telemarketers who don’t follow the rules? Be smart. Hang up immediately on all robocalls. They are illegal unless you have specifically given your written consent to receive them. Don’t listen to the message, and don’t press any numbers. Although scammers can call from anywhere in the world, and often use fake caller ID, it is important to report robocallers’ numbers to the FCC. Contact the Do Not Call registry and put the numbers into their database. The FCC has given approval to several robocall-blocking technologies. Contact your phone company and ask them to offer these to their customers. Married (or Not) With Children - In the most recent Census Bureau report (2013 American Community Survey), there were 115,731,304 total households in the United States. Of these, 726,600 were same-sex households. About 35% of these couples were married or in civil unions. 22% of female couples, married or not, had their own children in the household, compared to 10% of male couples. The overall percentage of same-sex households with children is 16%. What


happens to the children of married spouses in these households if the couples divorce? As in opposite sex divorces, there will be custody and support decisions to be made, but they are likely to be more complicated because of legal parentage issues and the need to determine the length of the relationship. Since same-sex marriage has only recently been possible in most states, there are thousands of couples who had long-term relationships prior to marrying. In some cases, both spouses are legal parents of the children. For many others, there is only one legal parent, and the other spouse may have few or no rights regarding the children. It may be difficult to work out an arrangement that both spouses agree on. Figuring out how and when assets and debts were accumulated before and after marriage is likely to be a serious challenge. When spouses simply can’t agree about custody, support and division of property, mediation is the next step to take. Arguing back and forth in court rarely solves issues to anyone’s satisfaction, and the court is likely to order mediation anyway. They Forgot to Do Their Homework - I talked a lot about Wills in a recent article, and made the point that everyone should have a Will and keep it updated, or there is likely to be a big mess when you die. Well, it appears that noted figures and celebrities are just as likely to ignore estate planning as the rest of us. Here are some of the many who caused lengthy and costly court battles, and should have known better: Robert Burns, Bob Marley, Abraham Lincoln (and he was a lawyer!), Barry White, Pablo Picasso, Howard Hughes, Heath Ledger, The Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr. Sonny Bono, Billie Holiday, John Denver, Jimi Hendrix, Amy Winehouse, Tupac Shakur. You may not be as rich or famous as they were, but you can oneup these notables. Create a Will and a Trust, and set your family and friends free from untangling your estate when you pass on.

This article is part of an ongoing series of articles pertaining to legal issues relevant to the LGBT community, and is intended for general information purposes only – not legal advice. Christopher Heritage is an attorney in Palm Springs and San Diego, who focuses on LGBT estate planning, domestic partnerships, same-sex marriage, probate, trust administration, and bankruptcy. He welcomes questions and comments and can be contacted at 760-325-2020 or at

It’s not just a Renova Energy system, it’s a $1,000 donation to AIDS Assistance Program – Food Samaritans. For any Coachella Valley Southern California Edison homeowner who mentions AAP as their referral source and completes a solar installation through a purchase or lease, Renova will contribute $1,000 to AAP in that customer’s name. If the customer decides not to proceed with solar, or choose a competitive offer after an in-home consultation, Renova will still make a $100 donation to AAP. Valid through December 31, 2017.

“ We promise to meet or beat any

competitive quote for a comparable system, so this is a win-win for everyone! ” – Vincent Battaglia Founder/CEO

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House music legends Inaya Day and Ultra Naté have joined forces on the New Year’s hottest collaboration, “Over Me”. Produced by Frankie Knuckles, the late great record producer known as the “Godfather of House Music,” the original song, written by Day and Naté, mixed seventies disco with a modern age vibe for an energetic, electronic groove. The latest versions, remixed by eight of the world’s leading DJ remixers, are now raising the ante with varying interpretations all intended to get arms waving in the air and booties shaking on the dance floor. “Though it’s about lost love, ‘Over Me’ is a fun song,” says Day. “There’s no deep message to it like in my ‘Keep Pushin’’ or Ultra’s ‘Free’. The song’s basically calling out exes who are faking the funk! We all know the types who say they’re over us but then keep calling on the phone and looking back at us with their sad, moping eyes when we walk away. Our answer to the guys is: you cut the strings of our relationship, now its time you cut the cord!” she laughs. “The idea was to make an empowering track for the ladies,” continues Ultra Naté from her Baltimore home. “People usually equate the lingering feelings of a lost love to women but more often than not, it’s men who have the hardest time moving on from a failed relationship. They’re often so desperate to hide their feelings, they end up doing some crazy, outlandish things that only make them look foolish.”

Eric Kupper on her first EP. Naté agreed and began writing the single. Day later added her contribution and the two divas met in a recording studio in NYC to lay down their vocals. “There was so much love in the studio that day,” recalls Inaya Day. “Ultra and I are like family. We fully support one another’s endeavors and aspirations.”

Inaya Day approached Ultra Naté about collaborating on a song. At the time, Inaya was working with Frankie Knuckles and

“We love and respect each other as people first and artists second,” agrees Naté.


Inaya Day became a force on dance floors in the late nineties with hits like “Keep Pushin,’” “Hold Your Head Up High,” and “Horny.” She continued her club domination through the early 2000s with “Nasty Girl” and the Mike Cruz-produced dance anthems, “Movin’ Up,” “Can’t Stop Dancing,” “Lift It Up” and “U Spin Me” and has kept the party going ever since with a multitude of hits including “Glamorous Life,” “One Night In Heaven”, and last summer’s “Love Is In The Air”. Holding firm to the belief that club music should be happy and up lifting, Inaya was voted one of Billboard’s Greatest Of All Time Dance Artists. Ultra Naté became a dance floor superstar with the release of her all-time classic #1 hit, “Free.” The single was named by Billboard as the #10 Greatest Of All Time Club Songs. Ultra Naté, herself, was named the #12 Greatest of All Time Dance Artists. Throughout her nearly three decades of making music, she has been a musical chameleon, embracing a variety of sounds, from R&B/hip-hop to soul, disco, rock and electro-pop. Frankie Knuckles played a vital role in developing and popularizing house music in the 1980s, when the genre was in its infancy. In 1997, he won the Grammy Award for Remixer of the Year. Due to his importance in the genre, Knuckles is often referred to as “The Godfather of House Music”. He was inducted into the Dance Music Hall of Fame in 2005. He died in 2014 from complications to his Type II diabetes. “Frankie and Eric Kupper’s Director’s Cut mix of ‘Over Me’ is perfection,” declares Inaya Day. “It is soulful, musical, and it’s classic.” She makes it clear that she and Ultra weren’t looking to top the original with the new remixes. They simply wanted to build a package of fresh interpretations of the track that could play on different dance floors. “We brought together an amazing collection of producers who cover different sub-genres of house. Each remixer brings their own perspective and rhythmic forte to the song.”


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I have been a nursing instructor for many years. When providing information regarding newborn babies, I often teach my students about “failure to thrive” babies. This is a phenomenon defined as a decelerated or arrested physical growth, which can be affected from the shear lack of touch. It is my belief that many adults suffer from this same lack of touch, specifically couples in long-term relationships. Whether it is a widow or widower, a divorcee who never remarries, someone who doesn’t date or dare I say, a couple who has been together for many years, sleeps together every night, yet never touches. In speaking with many friends, the later seems to be more common than not. Are you in that position? Is your body starving for touch? Have you forgotten what touch feels like? Have you just accepted that you will not feel touch from your partner, again? Or, are you creeping? It is my belief that creeping, or for those who are not familiar with that expression, cheating will not satisfy the void you are missing from your partner. At least, that is how it would be for me. The


greatest joy about being in a committed relationship is the development of THAT relationship. In my mind, nothing is more exciting than having an open and healthy communication that you continuously build on the intimacy. The word intimacy is great, because I am not talking about sex. Many couples engage in sex, yet have no intimacy. Some of those same couples even have frequent intercourse, yet can’t have a conversation to save their lives. Is it too antiquated to want the passion of “courting”? Or better yet, what about when you think back to when you first started dating. Remember how you couldn’t wait to have a “stolen moment”? What about when a shopping spree turned into a “stolen moment” in the dressing room? Or driving down the freeway at 1am that would have given a police helicopter pilot more to report than when O.J. Simpson was driving down the freeway? Here’s one, what about when you go on vacation and can barely get into the room before you’re both stripped down and two hours later you’re requesting more towels? See, I took you down memory lane.(smile) So, how and why does that interest and energy cease? Do we really take each other for granite so much that you think they will always be there? Are we like a drug

addict who continuously needs a new drug or a higher dosage to achieve the same high? Perhaps some behaviors are “learned” or “not learned”. For instance, and I will share (smile), I have NO recollection, of EVER seeing a couple in my immediate family, church family, neighborhood family or community family where affection was displayed. I mean, NEVER, not even hand holding. However, I grew up watching expressions of romance and public displays of affection on most television shows and movies. So, for me, that is what resonated. As I entered the dating world, I quickly learned that it is more “common” for people to want to have random or clandestine sex, instead of wanting to develop a relationship of open communication and definitely not wanting to verbally express their physical interests. How can you be sexually active with a partner, yet one or both of you are too “embarrassed” to discuss what will keep the fire burning? Personally, I even find it exciting that what I may have never done, because of my love for someone I would swing from the chandelier if that is what they requested. Now, here is where it gets scary. To me, in general, I think people do things (or not) because they don’t know any better or they don’t care. What is the plan once you KNOW that they know

better, and you have to unequivocally consider that they don’t care? Or consider that they are just damn lying about…something? Surely it would be painful and lonely if they are not even willing to discuss your needs and be honest with theirs. Here is the $64,000 question, when you have gone long past the speculation that you think they are cheating to having to accept that they just don’t want you, what’s the plan? We would like to ask all of our many readers to email us at and tell us, “Are you experiencing a “failure to thrive” relationship? If so, what are you doing about it or what did you do about it? What was the outcome? Were you comfortable with your decision or should you have done something differently? We will post the responses in the next issue, and as always, will maintain your confidentiality. Please accept this personal invitation to visit and learn about educational and scholarship opportunities for people of all ages, people of all races. As a nation, we MUST change our culture, our learned behavior, so that it can reflect an expression of love in ways that we have only dreamed.

WHAT WE DO: • Daily hot nutritious meal to over 135 people a day, 6 days a week. • Sack lunches daily –over 1200 a week served. • Phone and mail service. • Morning coffee, rolls and fruit. • Showers daily. • Furniture for people in need. • Clothing for job interviews and those who need them. • Assistance with food stamps, MISP, id’s and more. • Utility assistance. • Rental assistance. • Free notary service. • Resume writing assistance.

• One way tickets home. • Saturday food distribution of healthy foods to working families, seniors, veterans, the disabled, families with children. • Emergency food boxes. • Some transportation to medical and social service appointments. • Van transportation to hot lunch sites. • Home deliveries to seniors who are homebound or frail. • “Well Assist” program to downtown merchants and other business owners. • Thanksgiving and Christmas celebrations for all in need. Christmas presents for all the children. • Well houses available for long-term group family living, and emergenies. • A family-friendly environment where all can feel welcome, cared about, and respected.

JANUARY 2018 45

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EL MIRASOL 140 E Palm Canyon Drive Palm Springs, CA 760.323.0721 RICK’S RESTAURANT 1973 N Palm Canyon Drive Palm Springs, CA 760.416.0090 PINOCCHIO IN THE DESERT 134 E. Tahquitz Canyon Way Palm Springs, CA 92262 760.322.3776

CHILL BAR 217 E. Arenas Road PS 760.327.1079 STREETBAR 224 E. Arenas Road PS 760.320.1266 THE TOOL SHED 600 E. Sunny Dunes Road, Palm Springs, CA 92262 760.320.3299 STACY’S AT PALM SPRINGS 220 E Arenas Rd Palm Springs, CA 92262 760.620.5003

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EVENTS CALENDAR JAN 27 PALM SPRINGS HEALTH RUN & FITNESS EXPO Start out the New Year with a healthy and fitness-oriented routine! Join thousands of runners for the Palm Springs Health Run & Fitness Expo Saturday, January 27 from 8:00 a.m. - 2:00 p.m. Run through the incredibly scenic neighborhoods of Palm Springs for the 10K, 5K and 1K Fun Run. Over 100 health and wellness booths provide giveaways and services, fitness experts, and cooking demonstrations. Register now and come experience one of the largest events of its kind in Southern California.

January 20th for our Building Dedication and Tenth Anniversary Celebration. Our Founders, Ric and Rozene Supple, have generously donated the Camelot Theatres to the Palm Springs Cultural Center, and we want to honor them, celebrate the gift with the community, and open our doors for a week-long celebration of culture and the arts. Everyone is welcome, and there are lots of activities and a couple of exciting surprises! The Certified Farmers’ Market opens at 8am. Desert Film Society has a screening at 10am. The dedication ceremony begins at noon. Later in the day, celebrate two very special screenings of Freedom To Marry, hosted by the Richard Norris Weissman Trust. DBA EVENTS ONGOING FOR MORE INFO VISIT WWW.DESERTBUSINESSASSOCIATION.ORG

specific hours. All galleries are open during our monthly First Wednesday Art Walk from 5 to 8 pm. TG MONDAYS. TRANSGENDER SOCIAL EVENT Every second Monday of the month, Transgender Social Hour discussing advocacy, transitioning & HRT. Allies, respectful admirers, and transgender umbrella all welcome. Portion of proceeds to benefit the Raina Chessman Fund. For more info PALM SPRINGS ART MUSEUM The Palm Springs Art Museum offers free admission every Thursday night from 4-8 p.m., sponsored by the City of Palm Springs. This provides an excellent way to start a trip to the City’s VillageFest, the popular weekly street festival held every Thursday night along Palm Canyon Drive.

ONGOING >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

NOW THRU JAN 15 PS INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL Now entering its 29th year, The Palm Springs International Film Festival is one of the largest film festivals in North America, welcoming over 135,000 attendees each year for its lineup of new and celebrated international features and documentaries. The Festival is also known for its annual Film Awards Gala, honoring the best achievements of the filmic year by a celebrated list of talents. Produced by the Palm Springs International Film Society, the Festival offers 14 days of events and film screenings featuring over 180 films. JAN 20 PALM SPRINGS CULTURAL CENTER ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATION Join the Board, Staff, family and friends of the Palm Springs Cultural Center on Saturday,


BACK STREET ART DISTRICT The Backstreet Art District boasts a diverse collection of galleries & businesses where you may meet artists, visit working studios and enjoy fine art all in one location. You can find most galleries open Wednesday through Saturday from 11 am to 4 pm, but nothing is set in concrete. We are a collective of boutique galleries and regretfully cannot always be in two places at once as we get called out on a variety of business items. Please check with any gallery regarding

CHILL BAR PALM SPRINGS A warm and fabulous twenty first century modern venue located on Arenas, suited with multi faceted rooms for any celebration. The gorgeous island bar is surrounded by hi-definition video entertainment and a comfortable designer lounge. Chill on the patio enjoying music and refreshing beverages with friends after a game of pool, or come by and say hello to our friendly staff. Open for business seven days a week. Get out of the heat, and come join us! 
Happy Hour (From Open to 7pm) and Late Happy Hour (From Midnight to Last Call)

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EVENTS CALENDAR THE SUNDAY BAND W/ SPECIAL GUESTS. PAPPY & HARRIET’S PIONEERTOWN The Sunday Rock + Roll Service is a Pappy and Harriet’s institution celebrating the healing powers of music and community! Every weekend the club’s favorite singers and players get together and trade songs. Come join us to see Victoria Williams, Gar Robertson, Carol Ann Crandall, Damian Lester, Bob Furgo, Rachel Dean, Ryan Norman, Caleb Winn, Danny Frankel and other talented locals performing for your drinking and dancing pleasure. With a come-as-you-are vibe, Sundays have seen great special guests like Robert Plant, Lucinda Williams, The Jayhawks, Rickie Lee Jones to name a few. THE JUDY SHOW. PURPLE ROOM SUPPER CLUB PALM SPRINGS The spirit of Judy Garland is alive and well and in Palm Springs at the famed Purple Room Supper Club every Sunday at 7:00! This blend of hysterical comedy and outstanding music explode into an evening of nonstop belly laughs, glamour and high camp, as celebrated entertainer Michael Holmes parodies Judy Garland, who in her 1964 television variety show, played host to some of the greatest female icons of the Golden Age of Hollywood.

RETRO ROOM LOUNGE Nestled near the center of gay nightlife in Downtown Palm Springs, Retro Room Lounge is the must-see neighborhood gay bar to visit in Palm Springs. With daily happy hour until 7 pm and reverse happy hour from 9pmmidnight, there’s always a deal for you. As an added bonus, our bartenders have hand crafted a drink menu that features specialty cocktails that you won’t find anywhere else.

Oh, and did we mention we have Jell-O shots too. Karaoke and Happy Hour every night!

OSCAR’S CAFÉ & BAR Located in the heart of downtown Palm Springs on the corner of Tahquitz Canyon Way and Indian Canyon, Oscar’s has a huge outdoor patio with lots of umbrellas for shade and misters to keep you cool, too. You can beat the heat any time of year and enjoy the views of Palm Springs. On Saturday and Sunday from 8am – 2pm, enjoy a $9 Bottomless Mimosas (juice included), a single $2 mimosa or a $5 Bloody Mary with brunch, during which both our full breakfast and lunch menus are available. Also join us for Sunday Funday Weekly Tea Dance 4pm-Close! Live entertainment weekly visit our website for details. LIPSTICK AT COPA Thursday nights at Copa just got a little hotter with a new show at the new showroom inside Copa. The Hot New Lipstick show is a raucous affair where the audience is encouraged to participate in singing, clapping, dancing, partying and celebrating special events. Featuring performances by Charles Herrera, Pinkie Meringue Shimmer, Marina Mac, Sassy Ross, Dion Khan, and Cherilyn, and emceed by the fabulous Bella Da Ball, this show will not disappoint. For ticket info and schedule of performers visit HUNTERS NIGHTCLUBS® Palm Springs, Palm Springs’ go-to gay bar and dance club, has been leading the way in full-out fun for 16 years now! And we keep it pumping, making it better for you all the time with our unparalleled event line-up. We enjoy having

the desert’s most sought-after and friendly DJs, full-on themed events, and a staff that has it all without the attitude. And of course, we are proud to hold the longest happy hour in the entire Valley. Remember: Size Matters. Come by for our happy hour from 10am- 7pm. Yes, that’s right: 9 hours long! For a list of all events and specials visit

SUNDAYS “The Playgirls” at Toucans Tiki Lounge featuring Tommi Rose. Performances at 8 & 10pm.These darling Divas of drag really deliver with their very own brand of entertainment to packed houses. Special guests appear weekly. DJ in the sound booth. Every Sunday Complete list of events FOR A COMPLETE CALENDAR OF EVENTS VISIT OUR MEDIA PARTNER, GAY DESERT GUIDE. CLICK ON LOGO

JANUARY 2018 49

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JAN 12 - 14

GAY 8 FESTIVAL 2018 LITTLE HAVANA MIAMI, FLORIDA Whether it’s a long time resident of South Florida who hasn’t had much of a reason to check out Little Havana in some time or an out of town snowbird or intrigued foreign traveler that pops into Miami Dade County to check out Gay8, the event strives to build a lasting bridge that will bring all of the city’s communities together in celebration and forge a union that will unite us all as proud Miamians for generations to come.

JAN 12 - 14

MID-ATLANTIC LEATHER WEEKEND WASHINGTON, DC Mid-Atlantic Leather Weekend is a threeday long party and event with participants that now number in the thousands. The heart of the weekend is the historic leather formal Saturday evening cocktail social, Leather Cocktails. Leather Cocktails is the weekend lynchpin gathering from which all other weekend events evolved.


JAN 14 - 21

ASPEN GAY SKI WEEK ASPEN, COLORADO Aspen Gay Ski Week is the premier gay & lesbian winter travel vacation event in Colorado. Not only is it a great vacation destination but also it is a fundraising event for local and national LGBTQ organizations. Aspen Gay Ski Week has gained the reputation of hosting the most exclusive and explosive winter entertainment. Worldrenowned DJ’s, indoor & outdoor pool parties, debauchery that will take you into the morning hours just in time to hit the slopes.

JAN 18 - 21

GAY CHRISTIAN NETWORK CONFERENCE DENVER, COLORADO Discover what makes the Gay Christian Network Conference the world’s largest, most celebrated, and highly anticipated annual LGBTQ Christian event. Join us January 18– 21 as we head to Denver, CO, for the 14th annual GCN Conference, taking place at the Colorado Convention Center. Each January, Christians from around the world gather at the GCN Conference for fellowship, worship, support, and more. Whether you’re LGBTQ, you love someone who is, or you just want to learn more, this four-day event is designed for you.

FEB 8 - 12 JAN 17 - 21

WINTER RENDEZVOU STOWE MOUNTAIN RESORT, VERMONT The largest and longest-running gay ski event in the northeast offers amazing discounts on lift tickets, rentals, lessons along with non-stop action; daily apres-ski, wine tastings, pool party, champagne reception, downhill drag race, bonfires, hot tubs, spa treatments, dance parties, ice sculptures and more!

INTERNATIONAL BEAR CONVERGENCE. PALM SPRINGS, CALIFORNIA Are you ready for a party? Bears from around the world are coming to Palm Springs to make a big splash! Top entertainment and DJs are expected to draw in hundreds from surrounding cities. International Bear Convergence Palm Springs is rapidly becoming the “must attend event in Palm Springs”. With attendees coming from all over the globe, it truly is an International event.

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JAN 27

REGENBOGEN BALL VIENNA, AUSTRIA The Regenbogen Ball is not only one of the most successful balls in Austria, it has also established a reputation for being the ball-season’s highlight for the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and intersex communities. It is a classical Viennese ball, in line with the city’s long dancing tradition. At the same time, however, it is an important manifestation of the modern spirit of queer culture, celebrated by LGBTI people and heterosexual guests alike.

JAN 20 - 27

AROSA SKI WEEK AROSA SWITZERLAND The annual Gay Ski Week in Arosa, one of Switzerland’s most enchanting winter resorts. Come experience Swiss hospitality, the charm of a true mountain resort and glamorous parties while you’re enjoying yourself with various activities throughout the week. There is a wide range of accommodations. Don’t forget to order your event pass for the week, or do you want to miss the foam party, a fondue night at the mountain hut, a classical piano concert, the pool party, our cabaret-night or the drag- queen ski race??

JAN 21 - 28

WINTER PRIDE WHISTLER 2018 WHISTLER, CANADA BC Our winter gay pride week features a packed event: skiing, snowboarding, parties, dances, social events and much more. The charming European inspired pedestrian village makes getting around easy to experience activities for Non Skiers & Riders or for those that need a break. Whistler offers an abundance of activities from inner tube sliding, dog sledding, snowmobile tours, bungee jumping, to flying through the forest like a Jedi Knight on one of the Zip-line courses. There are hundreds of spa and body treatments to be had, wellness programs, culinary experiences, art galleries and abundant people watching opportunities throughout the resort.

JAN 14 - FEB 4

MIDSUMMA FESTIVAL 2018 MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA Don’t miss Melbourne’s most famous familyfriendly community day that kicks off summer’s beloved three-week Midsumma Festival season. Midsumma Carnival will serve-up a tasting plate of performances and personalities from the festival program – in one giant showcase – with something for everyone. Check out sports displays, get pooch-smooched at the famous Dog Show, or test out your favorite songs in the Lipsync Limelight competition. Food trucks, bars and stalls galore, all top-full of treats to keep you hydrated, fed and in the community spirit. For complete schedule visit

JAN 31 - FEB 5

ARENA MUSIC FESTIVAL PLAYA DEL CARMEN, MEXICO Arena is Mexico’s biggest gay and lesbian dance music festival. This year ARENA Music Festival is being held in Playa del Carmen on Rivera Maya. It will be 6 days of all out fun, music and much more with 13 special parties! Come join us on the beautiful beaches of Playa del Carmen as we celebrates ARENA’s 4th year with a blow out. This is the 2018 winter event you won’t want to miss.

FEB 6 - 14

SITGES CARNIVAL SITGES, SPAIN Carnival has to be Sitges’ wildest party. Even though it is on in February it is still the hottest party in town! On the most popular days you will find thousands of partygoers dancing on the major streets across the town. Gay boys and girls from the 4 corners of the world descend on our little town and party the week away! Sitges Carnival is one of the world’s top 10 carnivals and attracts more than 250,000 people to Sitges over 7 days with amazing parades, shows and parties. This is one winter festival you don’t want to miss!

Our international media partner, FNQ Magazine, Cairns gay lifestyle and travel publication that gives Australia and the world a taste of gay life in the tropics, sponsors the International Calendar.

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