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COMMENTARY
The Standard Magazine
400 N Sunrise Way #263 Palm Springs CA 92262 760.831.4869
NINO EILETS Publisher
LUCIANO McNULTY Editor
MAYA KALABIC Art Director
PHOTOGRAPHER
David A. Lee
CONTRIBUTORS
Bryan J Laughlin, Mikey Rox, Nestor M. Allende, Jason Stone, Tom Tietjen, Tim Blankenship, Mona Elyafi, Dustin Hawkins, David Gray, Jason Mannino, Jacquelyn James, Trevor Garrison, Stacy Holmes, Greg Stillwell, Dann Foley, Jill Langham & Terri Schlichenmeyer www.thestandardps.com
The Standard Magazine is published monthly. Opinions expressed are not necessarily the opinions of the Standard or its staff, advertisers or readers with exception of editorials. Publication of the name or photograph of any person, business or organization in articles or advertising in the Standard is not to be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of such person, business or organization. The Standard disclaims any responsibility for claims made by advertisers. Advertising rates are subject to change without notice. The Standard reserves the right, at its sole discretion, to reject any advertisement for any reason including, but not limited to poor taste. It is the policy of The Standard that we only publish letters to the editor that are signed by the author and verifiable by phone number. We can reserve the right of anonymity upon request. The letters need to be original, in good taste and free of libel as well as edited for clarity and grammar. Letters are subject to editing by The Standard that also reserves the right to decline print. Please forward your letters to: info@thestandardps.com The views expressed is not necessarily those of The Standard. Copyright 2013. All rights reserved. No portion of the publication may be reproduced in any form without the expressed consent of the publisher.
TOP LGBTQ+ DESTINATIONS IN 2025
BY NESTOR M. ALLENDE
Sometimes a break away from the day-to-day grind is exactly what your mind and body need and traveling gives you just that; the space and time to relax, collect your thoughts and reboot from the daily grind. And finding LGBTQ-friendly travel destinations is an important part of the experience where there are many options for those seeking a safe and welcoming space to prioritize their mental and physical health. From gorgeous beach destinations to dynamic urban experiences, LGBTQ+ travelers are always looking for that next “new” place to visit. But we still have some old standbys, places that are accepting and hold a special place in its collective heart. Here are a few destinations that should be on the radar for queer travelers in 2025.
COVER
CANADA
The US’s neighbor to the north has long been famed for being more progressive and open-minded in both its culture and legislation than much of the US, making it a popular choice for gay holidays. Gay travelers will find a rich, rewarding experience waiting for them in many of Canada’s major cities, whether they visit the French-Canadian epicenter of Montreal; Toronto, home to the largest LGBTQ+ community in Canada, or Vancouver, often rated one of the most livable cities in the world. All three cities rank among the best gay travel destinations in North America with dynamic queer culture and nightlife, as well as massive Pride celebrations worth checking out.
SWEDEN
Sweden has been a historically popular vacation spot for LGBTQ+ travelers, self-described as a “rainbow-flag waving country” where there are more Pride festivals per capita than anywhere else in the world. Sweden’s generally considered a desirable travel destination for anyone, with Stockholm voted “Europe’s friendliest city” in Condé Nast Traveler’s Readers’ Choice Awards, and gay travelers will be especially pleased with how easy it is to move through the city with a partner. The city is known for hosting more Pride festivals per capita than anywhere else, making it one of the most LGBTQ+ friendly countries to visit in 2025.
THAILAND
Thailand’s capital city hosts a high volume of travelers and tourists each year, and a not insignificant number of them are gay — Bangkok is famous as a gay-friendly travel destination, sometimes
called the gay capital of Southeast Asia. The city features plenty of gay nightlife — check out Silom Soi 2 and Silom Soi 4, or check out the drag show at Stranger Bar, and a wide range of saunas. During the day, explore Bangkok’s legendary architecture and religious sites, or check out Chatuchak Weekend Market.
ARGENTINA
Argentina was the first country in Latin America to legalize same-sex marriage and remains a popular destination for LGBTQ+ travelers from across the globe — especially in the vibrant capital city of Buenos Aires. Buenos Aires’ official Pride parade takes place in November, but visitors in August can also enjoy BADiversa, a local celebration of LGBTQ culture that lasts a full week. When you’re not enjoying the culture and nightlife in the heart of the city — including dedicated LGBTQ+ tours — travelers to Argentina can also check out the beautiful natural sights of the region. The country also offers gay vacation ideas for nature lovers, with stunning natural attractions just outside the city.
GREECE
While historically conservative, Greece has undergone a transformative journey towards inclusivity in recent years, solidifying its status as one of Europe’s most LGBTQ+ friendly countries. In 2015, Greece passed legislation allowing same-sex couples to enter civil unions, granting them the same legal recognition and rights as heterosexual partnerships. Greece now boasts anti-discrimination laws that protect individuals based on sexual orientation and gender identity too.
MEXICO
Mexico is a wildly popular gay-friendly vacation spot for North Americans for a reason; it’s accessible, affordable, and offers an incredible range of options for visitors from out of the country. LGBTQ+ travelers may be drawn to famously gay-friendly Puerto Vallarta, where the “Zona Romantica” neighborhood features gayfriendly bars and even a gay beach section of Playa de Los Muertos. If you’re open to seeing Mexico outside the beaches, Mexico City is an unforgettable hub of cultural destinations and exciting nightlife — check out the Zona Rosa for gay culture and community.
NETHERLANDS
Amsterdam has long been known for gay-friendly vacations throughout the rest of the world for its open, tolerant culture; it’s no surprise it’s often considered a top destination for gay travelers, boasting a range of gay bars and cultural events. Amsterdam’s most famous gay street is the Reguliersdwarsstraat, which first became an epicenter of gay life back in the 1960s and is now just one of several gay neighborhoods. During the day, check out Amsterdam’s famous canals, the Homomonument, and the Museum of Sex.
PHILIPPINES
The Philippines is one of Asia’s most gay-friendly countries. In Manila, the Makati City area offers a wide range of gay bars and drag shows, making it the perfect spot for a night out. If you want to relax, head to Boracay Island or Palawan—two of the most popular gay travel destinations in the Philippines.
ICELAND
Iceland is a progressive paradise nestled in the heart of Europe. The government legalized same-sex marriage back in 2010 and introduced a string of progressive policies, with comprehensive anti-discrimination laws safeguarding individuals based on sexual orientation and gender identity. Reykjavik hosts a huge annual Pride festival, which draws thousands of revelers every year. Plus, the education system takes proactive steps to promote LGBTQ+ awareness and inclusivity. Iceland is breaking barriers when it comes to politics too; Jóhanna Sigurðardóttir made history as the world’s first openly gay head of government when she ascended to the role of Prime Minister in 2009, paving the way for greater LGBTQ+ representation on the global stage.
MALTA
This rainbow haven in the Mediterranean is one of the most LGBTQ+-friendly countries in Europe for very good reason. It has an IGLA ranking of 90.29% – the highest of any European country – due to its robust anti-discrimination policies and initiatives, such as the Ministry of Education’s new policy to make schools more inclusive to trans, gender variant and intersex children. Malta made history in 2017 by becoming the first European country to ban conversion therapy and same-sex marriage has been legal for nearly 10 years.
PORTUGAL
Portugal is one of Europe’s most progressive and inclusive countries, thanks to its progressive policies and vibrant LGBTQ+ community. In 2010, it became the eighth country in the world to legalize same-sex
marriage and since then the government has enacted comprehensive anti-discrimination laws, including legal recognition of same-sex couples in areas such as adoption. The capital hosts an annual Pride festival, and the country ranks highly for LGBTQ+ lifestyle thanks to its diverse array of bars, clubs and cultural events.
BELGIUM
Belgium regularly ranks as one of the most progressive countries in Europe when it comes to LGBT+ rights. According to the IGLA, Belgium holds the second position in the EU based on how its laws and policies of the country impact the lives of LGBTQ+ individuals. In 2023, Belgium celebrated the 20th anniversary of legalizing samesex marriage, showcasing its commitment to equality. The country is renowned for being a safe and inclusive environment for travelers too.
IRELAND
The Emerald Isle has long since cemented its position as one of Europe’s most LGBTQ+ friendly destinations thanks to its progressive and inclusive attitude. It was the first country in the world to legalize same-sex marriage by popular vote and has since built on this victory with other progressive laws, such as the Gender Recognition Act of 2015. But it’s not just about legislation; Ireland’s LGBTQ+ community thrives in its colorful pubs and lively festivals. Dublin is home to at least seven iconic LGBTQ+ bars and hosts the annual Dublin Pride Parade festival, as well as a string of other festivals across the country like the Dublin Gay Theatre Festival, GAZE LGBY International Film Festival and Galway Pride.
GERMANY
When it comes to LGBTQ+ friendliness in Europe, Germany comes up trumps thanks to its progressive laws, robust representation and vibrant cultural scene. The country’s legal framework champions equality, with same-sex marriage legalized in 2018 and full rights and recognition granted to LGBTQ+ couples too. Berlin hosts one of Europe’s largest Pride events, Christopher Street Day, and other
cities like Cologne and Hamburg also host Pride festivals. There are dozens of LGBT-friendly districts sprinkled across the country, from Berlin’s Schöneberg to Cologne’s Bermuda Triangle.
TAIWAN
Taiwan was the first country in Asia to legalize same-sex marriage and is a dream destination for gay holidays. Taipei is generally regarded as an open, charming gay-friendly destination. Its gay epicenter is Ximen, a bustling neighborhood featuring the Red House, a historic theater that’s been converted into a cultural center and is now surrounded by gay bars, shopping, and culture. Later in the evening, Ximen offers a wide range of gay nightlife, from drag shows to basement bars. In the morning, you can recover from your evening at one of the area’s natural hot springs or spas.
UNITED KINGDOM
The UK is one of the most culturally liberal and inclusive countries for LGBTQ+ individuals. In the past two decades, societal attitudes have evolved with widespread support for the LGBTQ+ community and there is increasing visibility of representation in various aspects of British culture. Major cities like Brighton, London and Manchester are well known for their thriving LGBTQ scenes with diverse nightlife, events and organizations. In fact, London has more gay bars than any other city in Europe.
SPAIN
This sunny Southern European country has rightly earned its reputation as the most LGBTQ+ country in Europe – it radiates warmth, and not just when it comes to the weather. It was one of the first countries in Europe to introduce same-sex marriage back in 2005 and since then the government has bolstered its commitment to the LGBTQ+ cause with legislation like the ‘Trans Law’, which allows gender recognition based on self-identification. Spain is home to some of the most popular LGBTQ+ celebrations on the continent and Madrid’s annual Pride event attracts over 2,000,000 every year.
WHAT DOES WORLD PRIDE’S TRAVEL WARNING MEAN FOR TRANSGENDER & NONBINARY PEOPLE? COVER
BY JASON STONE
With WorldPride 2025, the biennial global celebration of LGBTQ+ visibility, set to bring millions to Washington, D.C. in weeks, LGBTQ+ leaders are sounding a message that blends honesty with resolve: yes, the risks for transgender and nonbinary people are real — and no, they won’t be erased.
What did WorldPride organizers say about trans and nonbinary people going?
After recently briefing the Metropolitan Washington Council of Governments of the possibility of needing to warn trans and nonbinary people about traveling to the nation’s capital, the Capital
Pride Alliance released guidance urging international travelers to assess potential risks, particularly those whose passports or legal gender markers may not align with the Trump administration’s restrictive new rules.
“WorldPride is happening at a pivotal time,” organizers said. “We recommend that travelers considering entry to the United States make an informed decision based on the potential risks involved.”
The statement quickly sparked conversation and acknowledged concern among LGBTQ+ communities both in the U.S. and abroad.
“We are doing everything that we can to make sure that every attendee is safe in attending WorldPride this year,” Dr. Elijah Nicholas, the National Trans Visibility March lead strategy director said in an interview. “This year’s march is more than symbolic. This is a strategic, pivotal moment. We’re convening at a time when our rights are under attack.”
Nicholas emphasized the value of preparation, not fear. “Know the laws in your country and in the U.S. Make sure your documents are in order,” he said. “But don’t let fear keep you from showing up — not if you’re able.”
The warning comes in the context of a sweeping rollback of rights under the Trump administration, which has moved to erase federal recognition of transgender people, bar X-gender marker passports, and require that all visa applicants list their sex assigned at birth. A memo circulated to U.S. consular offices earlier this year instructs officials to flag and possibly reject any application where a person’s gender presentation does not match the marker on their visa form.
That policy has triggered international consequences. Germany, Denmark, Finland, Ireland, the Netherlands, and Portugal have all
issued travel advisories for transgender and nonbinary travelers heading to the U.S. Ireland’s warning notes that U.S. authorities “require travelers to declare their biological sex at birth,” and Finland cautions that “a valid ESTA or visa does not necessarily grant entry.”
Ryan Bos, executive director of the Capital Pride Alliance, recognized the rising tension but said the mission remains unchanged.
“Pride has always been a protest,” Bos said. “The act of being joyful in the streets — that’s protest. We’re being told [the LGBTQ+ community doesn’t] have value… and doing this anyway is the most powerful thing we can do.”
Is D.C. ready for WorldPride?
Bos emphasized that a vast June 8 march and rally — planned well before the latest policies — now carries additional weight. The event will begin at the Lincoln Memorial and conclude with a march along the National Mall toward the Capitol. Organizers expect it to become one of the largest and most visible protests for LGBTQ+ rights since Trump returned to office.
The D.C. Mayor’s Office of LGBTQ Affairs said, “We are proud to welcome more than 3 million visitors to Washington, DC, for
COVER
WorldPride 2025. Our government agencies are working diligently with community organizers to ensure that WorldPride is a safe, accessible, and bold celebration of our community.”
Advocates for Trans Equality, one of the leading national organizations focused on trans rights, also responded to the Capital Pride guidance. A. Lazarus Orr, A4TE’s press relations manager, said concerns are valid and expected in the current climate.
“Across the country, hundreds of anti-trans bills have been introduced,” Orr told The Advocate. “At the federal level, the Trump administration is dismantling key government offices, attacking medical research, and issuing executive orders that endanger the health, safety, and dignity of trans people nationwide.” The American Civil Liberties Union is tracking at least 569 anti-LGBTQ+ bills across the country in the first four months of 2025.
Still, Orr said, Pride matters — now more than ever.
“We also believe in the power of community, visibility, and joy — especially in the face of adversity,” Orr said. “Travel with a friend or group. Share your location. Know where medical tents and emergency exits are.”
What are some tips for trans and nonbinary travelers in the U.S.?
Organizers say travelers should educate themselves on the legal landscape in their home countries and the U.S. They encourage international visitors to contact U.S. diplomatic missions before traveling, ensure that documentation is consistent and up to date, and coordinate with trusted contacts during their visit.
A4TE also urges attendees to know their surroundings—locate medical tents, understand emergency exits, and plan how to respond to discrimination or violence. And most importantly, Orr said, travelers should listen to themselves and trust their instincts.
“If you ever feel unsafe or overwhelmed, it’s okay to leave early or not attend at all,” they said. “There will be smaller community events happening throughout the weekend—staying safe while celebrating trans joy is always the priority.”
Nicholas, a retired military officer, also expressed confidence.
“I believe the investments we’re making in security are sound,” he said. “I’ve walked the spaces. I’ve spoken to our partners. We’re not taking safety lightly — and we’re not backing down either.”
WorldPride 2025 marks the 50th anniversary of D.C.’s first Pride celebrations, and for Nicholas and many others, that history adds even more meaning.
“This is about resilience,” he said. “About continuing to show up and to remind the world that trans, nonbinary, and intersex people
are not just part of the movement — we are leading it.”
Or, as Orr of A4TE put it: “Pride is protest. Pride is celebration. Pride is survival. And no matter how hostile the political landscape becomes, trans people will continue to exist, to resist, and to thrive. We have always been here, and we always will be.”
BOOK REVIEW
ALWAYS OVERBOOKED
BY TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER
Sometimes, you just want to shut the door and forget what’s on the other side.
You could just wipe it from your memory, like it didn’t occur. Or create an alternate universe where bad things never happen to you and where, as in the new novel “Make Sure You Die Screaming” by Zee Carlstromn, you can pretend not to care.
Their mother called them “Holden,” but they’d stopped using that name and they hadn’t decided what to use now. What do you call an alcoholic, queer, pessimistic former ad executive who’s also “The World’s First Honest White Man,” although they no longer identify as a man? It’s a conundrum that they’ll have to figure out soon because a cop’s been following them almost since they left Chicago with Yivi, their psychic new best friend.
Until yesterday, they’d been sleeping on a futon in some lady’s basement, drinking whatever Yivi mixed, and trying not to think about Jenny. They killed Jenny, they’re sure of it. And that’s one reason why it’s prudent to freak out about the cop.
The other reason is that the car they’re driving was stolen from their ex-boyfriend who probably doesn’t know it’s gone yet. This road trip wasn’t exactly well-planned. Their mother called, saying they were needed in Arkansas to find their father, who’d gone missing so, against their better judgment, they packed as much alcohol as Yivi could find and headed south. Their dad had always been unique, a cruel man, abusive, intractable; he suffered from PTSD, and probably another half-dozen acronyms, the doctors were never sure. They didn’t want to find him, but their mother called…
It was probably for the best; Yivi claimed that a drug dealer was chasing her, and leaving Chicago seemed like a good thing.
They wanted a drink more than anything. Except maybe not more than they wanted to escape thoughts of their old life, of Jenny and her death. And the more miles that passed, the closer they came to the end of the road.
If you think there’s a real possibility that “Make Sure You Die Screaming” might run off the rails a time or three, you’re right. It’s really out there, but not always in a bad way. Reading it, in fact, is like squatting down in a wet, stinky alley just after the trash collector has come, it’s filthy, dank, and profanity filled. Then again, it’s also absurd and dark and philosophical, highly enjoyable but also satisfying and a little disturbing; Palahniuk-like but less metaphoric.
That’s a stew that works and author Zee Carlstrom stirs it well, with characters who are sardonic and witty while fighting the feeling
that they’re unredeemable losers – which they’re not, and that becomes obvious.
You’ll see that all the way to one of the weirdest endings ever.
Readers who can withstand this book’s utter confusion by remembering that chaos is half the point will enjoy taking the road trip inside “Make Sure You Die Screaming.”
Just buckle up tight. Then shut the door and read.
“Make Sure You Die Screaming” by Zee Carlstrom c.2025, Flatiron Books. $26.99. 224 pages
FEATURE MY EXPERT TRAVEL ADVICE?
LIVE – AND LET LIVE!
BY MIKEY ROX
As a nomad who regularly updates an experience-based Instagram account, I see a lot of algorithmic memes, reels and comments about travel. From articles on how to keep your money safe from pickpockets to video tips on scoring the cheapest airfare to user anecdotes on hidden gems in some of the wildest places on the planet, there’s no shortage of adventure-forward content.
There’s an interesting underbelly to this content, however, where keyboard warriors express their first-world privilege of shaming other travelers for traveling like tourists. American-on-American bullying, at its finest – because we’re a nation of never-ending micro-aggressions. It is your own people, as somebody once wisely observed.
Recently I ran across a social-media post that put down picky eaters traveling to foreign countries. The caption, under a video of Americans in a fast-food restaurant, asked, ‘What kind of people travel abroad to eat at McDonald’s?’ It’s me. I’m that kind of people.
I don’t strictly eat at fast-food restaurants when I’m traveling abroad – I support local establishments – but I also have a limited palate and plenty of self-imposed dietary restrictions.
I was in Tokyo, and I don’t like fish. There’s a lot of fish in Tokyo. So, I shopped at the supermarket for food for my mini-fridge, I dined at steakhouses (find the one on my Instagram for a hot tip on the butteriest, most mouth-wateringist Wagyu you’ll ever put between
your lips), and, if I was out pounding the urban pavement all day, I popped into McDonald’s for lunch.
In my own defense, I don’t eat at McDonald’s at home often. That says nothing about the quality of the food, but rather that I’m still traumatized by pandemic fast-food practices where I had to order through an app but couldn’t pick it up because my van, a Ram ProMaster 2500, wouldn’t fit through the drive thru. I was told at a Wendy’s during peak Covid, while standing at its front door pleading for attention from the aloof workers inside, that I had to go around the building and stand in the drive-thru to pick up my order, with vehicles in front of me – and likely vehicles behind me eventually – so I could look like a lunatic. What would I do when I got there – lower my head in embarrassment? Apologize silently to the family in front of me – and the one over my shoulder – for being the first weirdo they encounter today? Pop in my AirPods and sporadically shuffle forward every time a stoner drives away with a sack full of Dave’s Singles? My $5 Biggie Bag was not worth that humiliation. I arrived at a Starbucks to pick up my drink that I could see sitting on the counter as I approached the front door, but I couldn’t get to it because the door was locked. There I am again, banging on the vault to all the riches at the
U.S. Mint, hoping that some 17-year-old with a broccoli-top would have pity on me. When they finally noticed me, I did my best signlanguage impression of a customer who ordered a hot chocolate but who also drives a Ram Promaster 2500 that can’t fit through the prohibitive drive-thru. After a few minutes, they realized I was someone who had taken their medication that morning, and they brought my venti to the door and beamed it through the crack so they wouldn’t catch my hypothetical cooties.
I feel differently about foreign McDonald’s, specifically.
I love the instant familiarity in a place where everything that surrounds me is new. I love looking at interesting menu items that we don’t have at home. And I love ordering a McChicken (yes, I’m a chicken-tenders-everywhere-I-go guy) when I want protein without emptying my pockets.
For some reason, that offends people – and that idea interests me. The idea that someone is privileged enough to travel the globe, experience the wonders of distant worlds, participate in unique cultures and customs, and they’re annoyed that not everybody wants to eat tiger balls and monkey paws? That sentiment speaks to a broader offense, I think: We’ve largely forgotten why we’re traveling.
FEATURE
A high-school buddy asked me on Facebook, after a new series of travel photos I posted, why I didn’t start a YouTube page dedicated to van life when I started it five years ago. He suggested that it probably wasn’t too late, as if I’d miss an opportunity if I didn’t seize it. But it was never about missing that proverbial boat –because I consciously chose not to get on it.
When I started planning my van-life adventure in 2018, I had a successful media career in Manhattan, and all the material things that came with it, but I was burnt out and I needed a change. So, I sold my real estate, bought the Ram, and hit the road. I only intended to explore the country for a year before settling back down, but that’s somehow morphed into a half-decade in the wild, and I have another couple years planned.
From the onset, I decided this experience was all or nothing, and a detractor from that would be to turn this into a content-fest. I have an Instagram, and I enjoy updating it, but it’s more about showing off dope ’fits and chronicling this adventure for myself so I have something to look back on fondly when I’m old. Thus, no YouTube content then, no YouTube content now.
Regardless of my willingness to do it, that space didn’t need another voice pretending that this lifestyle is a dream. It’s a lot of things – a lot of things for which I’m grateful – but easy it isn’t, and I’ve deduced that much of the rose-colored, self-edited, socialmedia nomad content is glorified BS.
Permit me to explain something else: Before van life, I was feral. I spent four years snorting coke inside a Virginia fraternity house before moving to downtown Baltimore to steal alcohol from neighborhood bars before running the streets of New York City for 10 years, where, in my neighborhood of Harlem, the residents affectionately called me White Mike. The point of that is that I’ve lived, in my own little way – but, admittedly, not always in the best or even healthiest way. It’s only dawned on me recently – a debt that’s probably owed to lab-formulated edibles from central Florida –that I enjoy living. I was sick and sad for so long, inundated from all sides all the time, that I completely forgot who I am and for what I’m here. That’s not to sound grandiose, either. Quite the opposite. It’s just to say that I think I finally get what they mean by ‘we’re here for a good time, not a long time.’
Those things I thought were most important in the past – the material ones – have become the least important part of my life. The anger that’s had a stronghold on my heart since I can remember has loosened its grip. My creativity is returning, and I’m starting to forgive people for however I think they’ve wronged me, but, more importantly, I’m starting to forgive myself for how I’ve wronged them.
That forgiveness hasn’t come without apologies, either. In a move that surprises even myself, I’ve reached out to individuals to formally apologize for my past behavior, and I plan to continue that. These years of solo travel have afforded that growth, and a full-time, nomadic life on the road also has changed my perspective on travel.
I don’t travel to show off or to pretend that I’m cultured –although I have been guilty of that in the past. Instead – now that I’m comfortable with who I am – I travel to see stunning sights with my own eyes, meet interesting people, and elevate my understanding of the world and my place in it. That’s the experience that appeals to me, and that’s what I want out of this life experience as well. Furthermore, those epiphanies have only come from dedicating myself to a purposeful life of open-minded exploration – without
worrying about what other people are doing with theirs.
People make a big deal because some travelers only want to hit tourist traps or grab a Big Mac at McDonald’s on their vacations. So, what. That’s what they’ve deemed the best experience for them, so who should argue? Living – and letting people live in whatever way brings them joy and peace and happiness – is all any of us should strive for in these United States that are consistently divided; among people who are increasingly negative and dissatisfied, especially online (both the cause and the effect); and in a world that often seems hopeless.
Travel, for whatever reason we’re doing it, helps us forget about those soul-crushing constants, however briefly, and in best-case scenarios, sometimes restores our faith in ourselves and each other.
At the end of the day, I’d like fries with that.
Mikey Rox is an award-winning freelance journalist whose passion for travel has taken him to all 50 states, 17 countries, and a couple drive-thrus he couldn’t get into. Follow his continuing adventures on Instagram @mikeyroxtravels.
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FEATURE A GAY GETAWAY TO PACIFIC GROVE
BY TIM BLANKENSHIP
Renowned interior designer Charles Gruwell, whose illustrious career spans over four decades with projects in San Francisco, Bali, Disney Resorts in Orlando, Las Vegas, and Hawaii, is embarking on his most ambitious venture yet: the transformation of a boutique hotel into a beacon of style and inclusivity for travelers worldwide.
Nestled in the heart of Pacific Grove, California, The Charles Pacific Grove—named after Gruwell himself—will be an LGBTQ+ friendly establishment that blends international flair with local character, ensuring every guest feels welcome. It marks the debut of the Metro Lifestyle Brand, a hospitality concept Gruwell has meticulously crafted alongside his partners, Don and Jay Desai. The brand is built on a vision of redefining style and inclusivity for the modern global traveler.
Every aspect of The Charles Pacific Grove is being designed to exude artistic sophistication. Interiors will seamlessly merge high fashion with classical artwork and unique furnishings, creating an ambiance of elegance and comfort. Each room will reflect an international aesthetic, offering guests a luxurious and culturally rich experience. To enhance the boutique hospitality experience, the hotel will feature gourmet breakfasts and a curated social hour with locally sourced wines and cheeses.
Beyond the hotel, Pacific Grove and the surrounding Monterey Peninsula offer a wealth of activities catering to LGBTQ+ travelers. The region’s natural beauty and commitment to inclusivity make it an ideal destination for both adventure and relaxation.
Whale watching is a highlight of the area, with Monterey Bay offering year-round opportunities to see gray whales, humpbacks, and even blue whales, depending on the season. Several local tour companies provide daily excursions, giving travelers the chance to witness these majestic creatures up close.
For those seeking a more active experience, paddle boarding is a popular pastime in Pacific Grove. The calm waters and stunning coastline create an ideal setting for both beginners and seasoned paddle
DESIGNER CHARLES GRUWELL - PHOTO BY KELLI ULDALL
THE OUTSIDE OF WHAT WILL SOON BE THE CHARLES HOTEL
boarders. Local outfitters like Adventures by the Sea offer rentals and lessons, ensuring a fun and safe experience for all skill levels.
Scuba diving enthusiasts will find the Monterey Peninsula’s kelp forests and marine sanctuaries teeming with vibrant sea life. Whether a novice or an experienced diver, visitors can explore the depths with the help of guided tours and equipment rentals from local dive shops.
For those who prefer to stay on land, Pacific Grove boasts some of California’s most breathtaking hiking trails. The Monterey Peninsula Recreational Trail offers stunning views of the Pacific Ocean and lush coastal landscapes, providing an ideal escape into nature. With trails suited for all levels, hikers can immerse themselves in the serene environment while taking in spectacular vistas.
Pacific Grove is not only known for its scenic beauty but also for its welcoming and inclusive community. The town is home to numerous LGBTQ+ friendly businesses and hosts events celebrating diversity throughout the year, ensuring visitors feel safe and valued during their stay.
As The Charles Pacific Grove nears completion, it is poised to become a premier destination for those who appreciate style, inclusivity, and impeccable hospitality. The remodeling is set to
be completed by the end of May 2025, just in time for a special Pride Month soft opening on June 1st. The official grand opening celebration is scheduled for June 28th, 2025.
In addition to the excitement surrounding The Charles Pacific Grove, Gruwell and his team have already expanded their vision with the acquisition of a second property in Napa, California. This location is currently welcoming guests and will undergo renovations by the end of 2025 to align with the Metro Lifestyle Brand’s signature aesthetic.
For more information, visit: Pacific Grove: www.TheCharlesPG.com Napa Valley: www.TheCharlesNapa.com
THE BEACH AT PACIFIC GROVE - PHOTO BY DCONVERTINI
FOUNDED IN 1885, THE POINT PINOS LIGHTHOUSE IS THE OLDEST CONTINUOUSLY OPERATING LIGHTHOUSE ON THE WEST COAST OF THE UNITED STATES
PACIFIC GROVE
HIGHWAY BRIDGE AT PACIFIC GROVE
Healthy Living!
COMMUNITY EDUCATION
MAY
Provider Referral
Need assistance finding a doctor or other provider? Call 760.568.1234
Immunotherapy for Melanoma: Recent Advances and Future Directions
Selby Dunham Community Lecture Series
M, May 5, 5:30 to 7 p.m.
Constantin Dasanu, MD, PhD
Board Certified in Medical Oncology and Hematology/Oncology
Visit EisenhowerHealth.org/Calendar to register online, or call 760.834.3798.
Better Understanding Heart Disease in Women Through Two Patients’ Experiences
Presented in partnership with Mended Hearts of Coachella Valley
TH, May 8, 6 to 7 p.m.
Carolyn Warner and Liz Young Visit EisenhowerHealth.org/Calendar to register online.
Skin Cancer Screenings
SA, May 10, 8 to 11 a.m.
Limited appointments available, registration is required.
Visit EisenhowerHealth.org/Calendar to register online, or call 760.834.3796
Bariatric Surgery Information
SA, May 10, 10 to 11:30 a.m.
Bobby Bhasker-Rao, MD
Board Certified in General Surgery
Visit EisenhowerHealth.org/Calendar to register online, or call 760.834.3796
Emergency vs. Urgency: Understanding Your Care Options
W, May 14, noon to 1 p.m.
Susan Veldey, MSN, RN
Visit EisenhowerHealth.org/Calendar to register online.
Gay Men’s Guide to Sex
W, May 14, 4:30 to 5:30 p.m.
Alex del Rosario, MD
Visit EisenhowerHealth.org/Calendar to register online.
Total Ankle Replacement —
The New Gold Standard for Ankle Arthritis
TU, May 15, 4:30 to 5:30 p.m.
David Friscia, MD
Board Certified in Orthopedic Surgery
Visit EisenhowerHealth.org/Calendar to register online.
Bariatric Surgery Information
TU, May 20, 8:15 to 9:30 a.m.
Jorge A. Almodovar, MD
Board Certified in General Surgery
Visit EisenhowerHealth.org/Calendar to register online, or call 760.834.3796.
Blood Drive
F, May 23, 10 a.m. to 3 p.m.
Visit EisenhowerHealth.org/Calendar to register online, or call 800.879.4484
Bariatric Surgery Information
W, May 28, 5:30 to 7 p.m.
Bobby Bhasker-Rao, MD
Board Certified in General Surgery
Visit EisenhowerHealth.org/Calendar to register online, or call 760.834.3796
Car-T Cell Therapy — Advances in the Treatment of Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia and B-Cell Lymphoma
Eisenhower Health, affiliated with UC San Diego Health Cancer Network, is proud to present a series of collaborative community education events, bringing the latest information on cancer care to the Coachella Valley.
TH, May 29, 5:30 to 7 p.m.
Ayad Hamdan, MD, Board Certified in Hematology, UC San Diego Health and Eisenhower Lucy Curci Cancer Center
Davood, Vafai, MD
Board Certified in Medical Oncology, Eisenhower Lucy Curci Cancer Center
Visit EisenhowerHealth.org/Calendar to register online, or call 760.834.3798
SUPPORT GROUPS
For information or registration, call the number listed, or visit EisenhowerHealth.org/SupportGroups.
Adults Molested as Children
Every TH, 4 to 5 p.m.
To register, call 760.340.2336
Bariatric Surgery
Second M of month, 6:30 to 8 p.m.
To register, call 760.834.3796
Breast Cancer
Every W, 9:30 to 10:30 a.m.
To register, call 760.834.3798
Caregiver Support
First and Third TH, 2 to 3 p.m. beginning May 15 To register, call 310.314.2555.
Gynecologic Oncology
Fourth W or month, 1:30 to 2:30 p.m. To register, call 760.834.3798
Grupo de Apoyo Contra el Cáncer en Español
El tercer miércoles del mes de 4 a 5 p.m. Llame a 760.837.8745 para confirmar asistencia o para más información.
Mended Hearts
Second TH of month 6 to 8 p.m., Oct to Jun To register, call 760.501.5096
Myeloma
First TH of month, 3:30 to 4:30 p.m. To register, call 760.834.3798.
Ostomy
First TH of month, 1 to 2:30 p.m. To register, call 760.773.2999
Parent Support
Every TU, 10 to 11:30 a.m. To register, call 760.773.2096
Prostate Cancer
First and third M of month, 4 to 5 p.m. To register, call 760.834.3798.
Diabetes: Tools, Tricks and Technologies
Third TU of month 3 to 4:30 p.m., Oct to Jun To
LGBTQ people are among the many subgroups of Americans known to experience high rates of food insecurity.*
*The Williams Institute
The LGBTQ Community Center of the Desert provides food for 30,000+ people annually.
SUNNY DUNES INC. ANNOUNCES ITS 3RD ANNUAL SUNNY DUNES CLUBHOUSE SPRING GALA
BY DUSTIN HAWKINS
“CommUNITY in Recovery”—to take place Sunday, May 18th at 5 PM at the Palm Springs Convention Center—will further empower the Sunny Dunes Clubhouse mission of fostering a safe and welcoming environment for the LGBTQ+ recovery community and their allies.
The major fundraiser will take place Sunday, May 18, 2025, with doors opening at 5 PM. The theme of this year’s event is “CommUNITY in Recovery,” and will be held at the beautiful Palm Springs Convention Center.
The Sunny Dunes Clubhouse fosters a safe and welcoming environment for the LGBTQ+ recovery community and their allies, welcoming all people seeking recovery through 12-step and other meetings, related events, and fellowship, in greater Palm Springs and beyond. It’s no surprise the clubhouse is described as “The LGBTQ+ recovery oasis in the desert.”
You may be wondering, “How come I’ve never heard of the Sunny Dunes Clubhouse?” Well, members of the eleven separate recovery programs that meet there are, by tradition, anonymous at the level of press, radio and films. But the elected leaders of the entity itself, Sunny Dunes, Inc., can and are going public about the non-profit’s community-transforming work. Sunny Dunes was started in the Summer of 1992 as a home for meetings of Alcoholics Anonymous. Due in part to the growth in both the number and size of the meetings, in November 2021, group members formed Sunny Dunes Inc. (dba Sunny Dunes Clubhouse), a California non-profit 501(c)(3) corporation established to serve the entire Palm Springs area LGBTQ+ recovery community and allies.
“We want to help more people recover in more ways,” explains Soterios Rouman, Board Chair of the non-profit Sunny Dunes, Inc. which operates the clubhouse. “We recognize that people in our community seek recovery for additional addictions beyond alcohol and also seek personal growth in many different areas of their lives.”
Sunny Dunes Clubhouse hosts a total of 93 meetings per week in its three meeting rooms, which translates to over 4,800 meeting per year totaling over 130,000 meeting attendances in 2024 alone. In fact, the number of individual meetings has increased by 55% since early 2024.
The ten 12-step programs which meet at Sunny Dunes Clubhouse include AA (Alcoholics Anonymous), ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics), Al-Anon, CMA (Crystal Meth Anonymous), CoDA (Co-
Dependents Anonymous), DA (Debtors Anonymous), GA (Gamblers Anonymous), NA (Narcotics Anonymous), OA (Overeaters Anonymous) and SLAA (Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous), plus the non-12-step program, Recovery Dharma.
“One thing that has personally surprised me,” reveals Rouman, “is the synergy created by having multiple programs under one roof, as people in one program are exposed to and learn about other programs to further help them on their recovery journeys.
“By opening up our gala to the general public,” Rouman emphasizes, “we hope to further introduce Sunny Dunes Clubhouse to the greater Palm Springs community, hopefully attracting donors who see the tremendous impact we’re having to improve and save lives on a daily basis.”
The joyous “CommUNITY in Recovery” fundraising gala will include a mocktail hour with Hors D’oeuvres, silent auction, threecourse dinner, with testimonials by Sunny Dunes members, and entertainment (to be announced). Tickets are available for $150 each with VIP at $250, and a limited number of tables of 10 for $1500 with VIP at $2500.
Get your tickets at www.SunnyDunes.org/gala
For more information, and a full meeting schedule, visit www.SunnyDunes.org
HOME MOVIES OUT OF THE CLOSET: LGBTQ+, HOLLYWOOD, PALM SPRINGS, AND YOU”
BY DAVID GRAY
The LGBTQ+ History & Archives of the Desert (Archives) is celebrating Pride Month by partnering with other local non-profits Deserted Films and the Palm Springs Cultural Center (PSCC) on Sunday, June 1, 2025, to present a day focused on LGBTQ home movies!
In the afternoon, the public is invited to bring their home movies and allow our home movie preservation experts to assess them and provide recommendations for storage and digitization. This FREE opportunity will be offered from 3:00 – 5:30 PM in the lobby of the Palm Springs Cultural Center, first-come, first-served.
From 6:30-8:00 PM the Archives and Deserted Films will screen family-friendly (13+), rarely and never-before-seen LGBTQ+ footage from our collections. In collaboration with the UCLA Library Film & Television Archive (www.cinema.ucla.edu), we will also treat audiences to LGBTQ+ works from UCLA’s collection by Pat Rocco featuring Palm Springs and Los Angeles, as well as other home movies of Hollywood stars at home, at work, and at play! Find out why we collect and why you need to care for your own home movies! Following the screening event there will be a Reception from 8 – 9 PM. Ticket for both the screening and reception is $45 which includes one drink ticket. Proceeds to benefit the Archives, Deserted Films and The Palm Springs Cultural Center equally.
“These films are a glimpse into the lives of LGBTQ people with their friends, and families, on vacation, and in their homes, it is important to show that their lives are part of the bigger story of society”, said David Gray Co-Founder, Co-Director of the Archives. “We celebrate Pride month by presenting this event with our partners to tell our stories and build good will and to nurture
empathy and compassion with the end goal of a more inclusive world and a realization that our lives are not all that different from each other. Our shared experiences are the key to creating a society that embraces equality and justice and continues to evolve to meet the needs of the community.”
All events will be held at PSCC located at 2300 E Baristo Rd, Palm Springs, CA 92262, with ample free parking available. For info visit www.lgbtqpshistory.org or call (760) 428-0467
THE BENT PRESENTS THE TONY AND OLIVIER AWARD-WINNING PLAY THE INHERITANCE PART 1
BY JASON MANNINO
The Bent is proud to announce the regional premiere of The Inheritance Part I, the acclaimed, Tony Award-winning pl ay by Matthew Lopez. Inspired by E.M. Forster’s Howards End, this sweeping and deeply moving epic story explores love, legacy, and the lives of gay men in 21st-century New York, decades after the height of the AIDS crisis.
Directed by The Bent Artistic Director, Steve Rosenbaum, The Inheritance Part I offers audiences a bold, resonant theatrical experience that has been hailed as “monumental” and “profoundly affecting” by critics and audiences alike.
PSP FOCUS
Rosenbaum. “Bringing The Inheritance to our stage is not only an
DAPHEALTH
DINING OUT FOR LIFE GREATER PALM SPRINGS 2025 SMASHES RECORDS FOR DAP HEALTH
BY DANIEL VAILLANCOURT
Coachella Valley rallies for health equity and HIV specialty care on the one-day-and-night-only annual foodie fundraising event.
On Thursday, April 24, the Coachella Valley showed up very hungry and full of heart as Dining Out For Life Greater Palm Springs 2025 brought together more than 20,000 diners across 65 participating venues to support DAP Health in its ongoing mission to advance health equity for the region’s most vulnerable, especially those affected by HIV.
From the Cabazon Outlets to Palm Desert and every desert town in between, locals and tourists made breakfast meetings, lunch dates, happy hour gatherings, and dinner outings count. Even a quick coffee or a late-night cocktail played a vital role. And that’s the point — every meal, every moment mattered.
RECORD-BREAKING SUPPORT ACROSS THE REGION
The 21st annual local edition of the international Dining Out For Life movement underscored the valley’s reputation as a philanthropic powerhouse. Participating restaurants, cafés, and bars donated 33% to 100% of daily sales — not just profits — to DAP Health. Notably, as it does every year, Townie Bagels owners (and husbands) Bill Sanderson and Andy Wysocki went above and beyond, donating 110% of the day’s proceeds.
“I lived through the original [AIDS crisis] in the ’80s, so it’s near and dear to my heart,” says Sanderson. “Now it’s more important than ever that we participate because HIV is still here, people are still getting infected… . We all watch the news. [Federal] funds are
being cut for a lot of programs, and we want to make sure that we can step up, as businesses, and help our community.”
MEDIA MOBILIZATION FOR MAXIMUM VISIBILITY
Local media lent their muscle to the cause in a big way. Local ABC affiliate KESQ News Channel 3’s Allie Anthony broadcast four live segments starting at 5:00 a.m. from Townie Bagels. Interviews featured Sanderson, DAP Health Chief Transformation Officer C.J. Tobe, Events and Partnerships Manager Rico Montero, and Community Health Programs Manager Manny Muro.
To be followed up with a heartfelt live segment on KGAY’s morning show with John Taylor.
Later, for NBC Palm Springs, DAP Health Chief of Brand Marketing Steven Henke appeared live from Chicken Ranch at 11:00 a.m., then from Rooster and the Pig at 5:00 p.m. while NBC Station Manager David Reese reported live from Eight4Nine Bar & Lounge.
AMBASSADORS: THE SOUL OF THE EVENT
As dinnertime descended, dozens of volunteer ambassadors filled venues valley-wide, welcoming patrons, sharing stories of DAP
Health’s lifesaving work, and handing out the ever-popular, colorful “I Dined Out For Life!” lapel stickers — worn proudly by participants as badges of honor for dining just once or multiple times during the day and night.
These volunteers also distributed donation envelopes, enabling guests to make additional gifts directly to the cause. All monies stay in the community, funding specialty HIV care and wraparound services for those DAP Health patients who depend on the nonprofit, whose nearly 1,000 medical professionals serve a total of more than 88,000 patients from wildly diverse communities at 25 clinics, eight mobile units, and one Sprinter van from the Coachella Valley to the San Diego coast.
Why DOFLGPS Still Matters
As Sanderson says — and most experts would agree — HIV is not over! According to the CDC, despite the relatively widespread availability of PrEP and PEP for the prevention of HIV, in 2022 in the U.S., there were 31,800 new HIV infections. For that same year, it is estimated that 1.2 million people over the age of 13 were living with HIV in America. Of those, only 87% were aware of their status, while 13% had not officially been tested and/or diagnosed.
Dining Out For Life is a national movement, with 50+ local HIV service organizations, 2,400+ participating restaurants, and 300,000+ diners raising over $4.5 million annually. Best of all, every dollar raised in Greater Palm Springs stays here, ensuring not only that those living with HIV receive the care and support they need, but that education and prevention efforts are protected and expanded.
DAPHEALTH
POWERED BY NEW AND TRUSTED LOCAL PARTNERSHIPS
This year’s desert success was bolstered by new event partners that broadcast the foodie fundraising fun to their networks prior to, and on, the day. Visit Greater Palm Springs promoted the event through digital and physical platforms, and the Greater Coachella Valley Chamber of Commerce activated its membership to increase participation. Gastronomic social media influencers David Cox and David Witzke, of Dining With the Davids, also spotlighted eateries to energize the community and make them aware of DAP Health’s crucial mission.
The Palm Springs Chamber of Commerce also had DAP Health and Dining Out For Life on the cover of the spring issue of its PSILOVEYOU, the magazine it publishes in partnership with the city of Palm Springs.
HEIGHTENED COMMUNITY INVOLVEMENT AT LOCAL EATERIES
While civic pride has always been high in Greater Palm Springs for Dining Out For Life, in 2025, many restaurants reported a veritable feeding frenzy compared to years past. Liz Ostoich — owner of Tac/Quila, FARM, Clandestino, and The Front Porch — verified that she broke her own record by more than $5,000 to land at a total of $41,499 for all four of her establishments. And that’s just from diners’ checks, not from supplemental donations.
Bar Cecil was mobbed all night, and Rooster and the Pig (recently named by USA Today as one of the top restaurants in the country and the top restaurant in Palm Springs) had 90 people in line prior to opening for dinner service and ultimately accomplished 3.5 seatings for a total of 410 diners. That number — more than $12,000 earned — compares to a high season Saturday night. Over at Johannes, the total count for the night was 150 covers — a crowd not seen since the most recent Palm Springs Modernism Week.
EYE ON THE PRIZE: NATIONAL LEADERSHIP
While fundraising totals take time to tally and finalize, hopes are high that thanks to all this energy and excitement, DAP Health might just nab the number one spot for 2025. For the record, Greater Palm Springs routinely places in the top three, and raised $280,000 in 2024, besting much larger metros like New York, San Francisco, and Chicago.
The bottom line is that no other local fundraising affair brings out more mainstream fervor — or exemplifies the goodwill and sense of service that is in DAP Health’s DNA — than Dining Out For Life. “Few other events bring DAP Health closer to our tap root of community action,” stresses DAP Health CEO David Brinkman. “We were founded [40 years ago] on unconditional love and guided by community members who defined and funded solutions to help those in need.”
PARTICIPATING RESTAURANTS
1501 Uptown Gastropub, Aspen Mills Bakery & Café, Bar Cecil, The Barn Kitchen at Sparrows Lodge, Birba Cabazon, Birba PS, Blackbook, Bongo Johnny’s, Boozehounds, Carousel Bakery, Catalan Mediterranean Restaurant, Chef Tanya’s Kitchen -Palm DesertChef Tanya’s Kitchen-Palm Springs, Chicken Ranch, Chill Bar, Cipolline Osteria Clandestino, Copley’s On Palm Canyon, Del Rey at Villa Royale, Eight4Nine Restaurant El Mirasol Cocina Mexicana, El Patron, El Tacolgado, Elmer’s Restaurant, FARM, The Front Porch, Fuzion Five, Gelato Granucci, Hall Napa Valley Tasting Room, Hunters Nightclubs, Ice Cream & Shop(pe), Jake’s, Johannes Restaurant, John Henry’s Café, Johnny Costa’s Ristorante, Juniper Table, Kaiser Grille Palm Springs, Kreem, La Cocina at Reforma, Le Donne Cucina Italiana, Loco Charlie’s, Lola Rose Grand Mezze, Lost Property Restaurant, Low Desert Modern Mexican, Native Foods, Palm Springs, Nick’s Italian Bistro, On The Mark, Palm Greens Café, The Pantry at Holiday House, Play Lounge & Café, Quadz Video Bar, Rooster And The Pig, Runway, Sherman’s Deli & Bakery – Palm Springs, Sherman’s Deli & Bakery East, SO•PA at L’Horizon, Spencer’s Restaurant, Stuft Pizza Bar & Grill, Tac/Quila, Toucan’s Tiki Lounge, Townie Bagels, Trio Restaurant, The Tropicale, Willie’s Modern Fare, Zin American Bistro.
PERSPECTIVE IN SEARCH OF “THE VIBE” PART 1
BY JILL LANGHAM
Happy May. I don’t know about you, but I find myself struggling to stay focused. I feel that it is a sign of the times that we are in. Things are changing rapidly, and no one knows what lies ahead. I keep wondering if our Palm Springs bubble is about to burst and ask myself if I will be ready for what is to come.
Truth be told, I have felt bored with Palm Springs over the last couple of years and have wondered if it is time for me to vacate to new pastures. Since I have not yet made a decision, I decided what I needed to do was to make some changes hoping to re-stimulate my interest in this town which brought me alive. The town that had a Vibe.
So, using my intuition as my guide I found myself heading away from Arenas and driving towards the newest version of the old St. Lawrence complex on the corner of Palm Canyon and Alejo to see if I could find the Vibe that drew me to Palm Springs 20 years ago.
This is not the first time for me to write about the lack of our Vibe, but this is the first time I decided to branch out and do
something about it. I find it harder and harder to participate in the same activities week after week minus the Vibe even though that means I will be missing seeing loads of you. It just stopped working for me and I wonder if that’s not true for a lot of you as well.
I feel that we are stuck, the way that a CD or a candy bar machine gets stuck and must be jarred to move it forward to reap the reward of the music or candy or both. Our community is stuck on SEX. For the record, I love SEX, so I am not here to judge, but I do know what addiction/entrenched/obsessed/pre-occupied behavior or hyper-focused actions looks like firsthand, and I see that it is rampant in our city.
We used to be a SEXY city especially when the Rat Pack came on the scene in the 50’s, Hollywood was SEXY (and very SEXIST, topic for another time) and as we know, SEX sells. But in those days, they left something to the imagination. People dressed up to go out. Men wore suits and ties and women, dresses and heels. They started out with cocktails at the pool, then showered and met at Happy hour in SEXY outfits just like we did when I first moved here.
I was amongst those who followed that same tradition up until I moved to Palm Springs in 2006 were I slowly started dressing differently. Back in 2005, you guys were dressed up at Happy Hour and then got SEXIER after dinner to go to the clubs. Men dressed up for dinner in nice, casual clothing but went home and changed into SEXIER clothing for the clubs.
So now I am on the hunt for this Vibe and am dressing up to go out on Friday nights not for Happy Hour prices but instead for a SEXY Vibe.
I feel that I have found that Vibe and when I looked around, I kept wondering when did Happy Hour change into what it is today?
I hate to say it but it’s when we began adding dancers to Happy Hour. The mood and the energy changed.
For the record, I love dancers.
But it totally changed the energy from SEXY to SEX and suddenly it was all the rage to wear jock straps and bootie shorts at 4pm. Even I started dressing differently. And from there things just kind of stayed down. It only as of late that the young girls of today have brought back the classic black dress and some of our younger Black men have brought back the suit to Happy Hour in places like LA or NYC but, not in here in our community, that is unless it’s a benefit or fund raiser! That’s when you guys all shine and are all SEXY studs!
I started thinking about the difference between SEX and SEXY and as Shakespeare says, “What’s in a word?”
Let’s start with the word SEX…. Read Part 2 next month in the June Edition of The Standard Magazine
XOXO,
Jill, Your SEXY Vibe seeking DQ
FEATURE PRIDE JOURNEYS
BY TOM TIETJEN
As spring turns to summer, travelers looking to pair unforgettable experiences with vibrant queer culture have two incredible events to add to their itinerary: Ultra Load in Las Vegas in May and WorldPride in Washington, D.C. in June. Each offers a unique kind of magic—one rooted in sun-soaked poolside revelry during the country’s biggest electronic music weekend, and the other in the dazzling spectacle of an international Pride celebration that spans four nights and multiple stages across the U.S. capital.
In Las Vegas, the desert heat meets high-octane celebration during Ultra Load: The Gay Village, a bold new concept from Desert Days debuting during Electric Daisy Carnival weekend, May 16 to
18. Held at the Alexis Park All Suite Resort, just off the Strip, Ultra Load transforms the daytime festival scene into an LGBTQ+ utopia with 3,000 revelers expected to dive into this immersive, music-filled escape. Each day from noon to 7 PM, pool parties erupt with beats from powerhouse DJs like Brad Lee, Nick Stracener, Hector Fonseca, and Dawna Montell, while the Jungle Room pulses with underground energy courtesy of Sam Gee, Jon Klaft, and others. The space itself is as thoughtfully curated as the lineup: guests will be welcomed by an all-gay service staff—the first of its kind at a major resort pool— and can explore queer-owned vendor activations, food and drink offerings, and luxe VIP amenities like cabanas and poolside lounge chairs. Designed to amplify queer joy during a weekend known for
its massive mainstream draw, Ultra Load creates a safe, affirming, and electrifying environment where the LGBTQ+ community can take center stage. With special discounts for Nevada locals and reduced hotel rates for out-of-towners, Ultra Load isn’t just a party—it’s a powerful statement of inclusion and a new tradition in the making.
Fast forward to June and the party heads east for WorldPride DC 2025, the first time the international event will be hosted in the U.S. capital. From June 5 to 8, the city will radiate with Pride as KINETIC Presents and Capital Pride Alliance team up to produce six epic parties across one massive weekend, culminating in the centerpiece celebration: Starlines. Taking place Saturday, June 7, Starlines is an intergalactic voyage into queer euphoria, bringing together global revelers for a night of spectacle, sound, and shared community. The event will transform more than 100,000 square feet into a multi-stage dance campus, headlined by world-renowned DJs like Dan Slater, GSP, and Binomio, and accented by immersive disco stages and surprise pop-up performances. Starlines is part of the Fabric of Freedom series, a theme that weaves through each of
the weekend’s flagship events—starting with Thursday’s “Yes to All” LatinX dance party from El Mozo, moving into Friday night’s bold and brazen UNCUT XXL, and closing with Sunday’s LaLeche! celebration, a sexy, sweat-drenched finale co-produced with Matinée, the iconic Barcelona brand. From the hypnotic Latin beats of DJs Leo Blanco and Onyx to the deep circuit sounds of Phil Romano and Nina Flowers at the official afterhours parties, this weekend is built for the brave, the beautiful, and the boundlessly proud.
Whether you prefer dancing in the desert sun or under D.C.’s Pride-lit stars, May and June are shaping up to be months of liberation, celebration, and connection. Ultra Load and WorldPride DC don’t just offer parties—they invite you into fully realized queer worlds that celebrate individuality, community, and joy on a massive scale.
Tickets for Ultra Load: The Gay Village are available now at www. desertdays.co. Tickets for WorldPride DC events are available now at KineticPresents.com.
MUSIC KEEANA KEE UNVEILS HER MOST POWERFUL WORK YET WITH “SMALL FRAGILE WOMAN”
BY MONA ELYAFI
Latvian-born singer/songwriter and fashion model Keeana
Kee is set to release her boldest and most soul-stirring single yet, “Small Fragile Woman,” along with a powerful music video that is a cinematic anthem of vulnerability, resilience, and empowerment.
Produced by Arturo Brambilla Cabrera and penned by Keeana herself, “Small Fragile Woman” is a pop ballad that radiates vulnerability, courage, and quiet defiance. This emotionally charged track reveals a new depth to the NYC-based artist — one that speaks truth to power, tenderness to pain, and strength to silence.
From soft, haunting beginnings to a sweeping, emotionally potent climax, the track moves with live strings and cinematic weight. The production is both intimate and grand building from raw, confessional verses to an anthemic chorus that echoes strength through fragility. The final vocal arrangement delivers a soaring,
unforgettable close, reinforcing the song’s core message: true power is often found in the most delicate places.
“This song comes from a deeply personal place,” says Keeana Kee. “It’s about standing tall even in your most vulnerable moments. I wrote it for everyone who’s ever been made to feel small yet found the courage to rise. I wanted to create something that would give voice to the quiet fighters — those who don’t shout but endure.”
Lyrically, “Small Fragile Woman” tackles the emotional impact of bullying and societal judgment, offering a moving portrayal of what it means to fight for dignity, belief, and self-worth. Keeana’s poetic imagery and stirring vocals transform the song into an anthem for anyone who’s ever felt silenced, underestimated, or dismissed — particularly women and members of the LGBTQ+ community.
One standout lyric encapsulates the heart of the song: “See me fall on my knees, holding head high full of beliefs.” It’s a declaration of resilience — a refusal to be broken.
The accompanying music video extends that message with striking visuals. Raw, expressive, and deeply symbolic, it features a powerful dance narrative performed by women. The choreography becomes a poetic dialogue — a fierce push and pull between pain and perseverance, softness and strength. It pays tribute to those who fight their battles in silence and rise with grace in the face of adversity.
More than just a song, “Small Fragile Woman” is a movement — a statement of defiance wrapped in elegance. It’s a love letter to every woman who’s ever been told she was too soft to survive, too emotional to lead, too fragile to fight. Keeana Kee, long known for using her platform to elevate conversations around women’s empowerment and LGBTQ+ visibility, continues her mission to create music that resonates on both emotional and social levels. With “Small Fragile Woman,” she reminds us:
Small is not weak. Fragile is not broken. And silence can roar.
Keeana Kee is a Latvian-born, New York-based singer, songwriter, and model known for her signature “Exotic Pop” sound — a dynamic blend of pop, Latin, Afropop and cinematic influences. Her debut single Coconut Rum and Coke, produced by Latin Grammy winner Maffio, earned over a million streams and introduced her as a bold and vibrant new voice in pop.
An openly queer artist, Keeana creates music that celebrates self-expression, empowerment and emotional truth. Her track GODDESS has become a Pride anthem — a fierce, unapologetic ode to queer identity and feminine power. With songs like Tik Tok and Small Fragile Woman, she continues to deliver powerful messages through rich visuals and emotionally charged soundscapes.
Through her art, Keeana Kee continues to build a global community of emotional soulmates —connecting people with music that is vibrant, vulnerable, and unapologetically authentic. She is not just a performer — she is a voice for visibility, authenticity, and the bold beauty of being exactly who you are.
Watch the “Small Fragile Woman” Official Music Video on YouTube/VEVO: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FszwLDWTfKw Stream “Small Fragile Woman” everywhere: https://hypeddit.com/t82t7k
2025 marks the 50th Anniversary of Pride celebrations in Washington, DC! The Capital Pride Alliance is excited for Washington, DC to host WorldPride 2025 and share this momentous and exciting milestone with our international community. WorldPride is occurring at a crucial time, bringing together voices from around the world to support the LGBTQ+ community’s ongoing fight for equality, visibility, and justice. We encourage everyone in our global community to participate in this historic moment. By showing up and supporting Pride events globally, the LGBTQ+ community will be visible, vigilant, and heard. www.worldpridedc.org
MAY 16- 18
SINGLE WOMEN’S WEEKEND. PROVINCETOWN, MASSACHUSETTS
The only weekend for single lesbians on the planet, Single Women’s Weekend takes place over three days and offers nearly 20 diverse events - including Speed Dating, dance parties, a wine tasting, and a single’s scavenger hunt. Single Women’s Weekend makes finding other single lesbians easy. Many couples found each other at Single Women’s Weekend. www.provincetownforwomen.com
MAY 17-18
LONG BEACH GAY PRIDE. LONG BEACH, CA
Join us at the 42nd annual Long Beach Pride Festival. Revel in a weekend that promises more than just music—it’s a cultural movement, championing diversity, inclusion, and the universal language of music. This year’s theme: The Power of Community www.longbeachpride.com
MAY 17-19
FIRE ISLAND LEATHER WEEKEND: LUST FOR LIFE 50: THE ORDER OF THE GOLDEN HARNESS FIRE ISLAND, NEW YORK
Join Excelsior M.C. for Lust for Life 50: The Order of the Golden Harness. Enjoy a weekend of parties, demos, camaraderie, and the Mr. Fire Island Leather contest on legendary Fire Island! www.excelsiormc.com
MAY 24-26
UNITED STATES GAY OPEN. SAN FRANCISCO, CA
Join us at the Goldman Tennis Center (Golden Gate Park) & San Francisco State University for the 43rd Annual USGO, the longest running LGBTQ+ tennis tournament in the world. We are expecting 200 entries from around the world this year! Memorial Day Weekend www.gltf.org/usgo
MAY 29 - JUN 1
BEARS, BIKERS & MAYHEM. BALTIMORE, MARYLAND.
Bears, Bikers & Mayhem is the first large event in the US to combine the Bear, Leather, Fetish, Motorcycle and Puppy Communities. Since its inception, BBM has had the singular goal of being an event at which men who, enjoy any or all of these communities will feel welcome, meet other likeminded men and, most importantly, have an incredibly fun time. www.bearsbikersandmayhem.com
MAY 2- 12
MASPALOMAS PRIDE MASPALOMAS, GRAND CANARY ISLAND
For those who have never experienced the Pride of Maspalomas, a surprise awaits you! The days are filled with various events: festivals, exhibitions, parades, tours, shows, and concerts, along with your favorite restaurants and bars in and around the Yumbo Centre joining in the fun! So, make yourself look fabulous and join in the Pride celebrations with us, together with dancers, singers, and drag queens! Are you ready for the craziest and most fun Pride festival in the World? www.maspalomaspride.es
MAY 5-19
INTERNATIONAL DUBLIN GAY THEATRE FESTIVAL. DUBLIN, IRELAND
The Dublin Gay Theatre Festival is an annual event, celebrating contribution of gay people to theatre, past and present. The Festival was founded in 2004 to mark the 150th anniversary of the birth of Oscar Wilde, in his native city. With an emphasis on new or recent international and Irish works with a broadly gay theme or relevance, the Festival has grown to become the largest event of its type in the world. www.gaytheatre.ie
MAY 13-17
69TH EUROVISION SONG CONTEST BASEL, SWITZERLAND
The most watched, loved, hated, talked about, campiest, overdressed entertainment show in the world: Eurovision. After a competitive selection process that saw several potential Host Cities narrow down to Basel and Geneva, Switzerland’s third-most-populous city won out, and will host the 69th Eurovision Song Contest. The first Semi-Final will be held on Tuesday, 13th of May, the second Semi-Final on Thursday, 15th of May and the Grand Final will take place on Saturday, 17th of May. Thousands of European fans - from Ireland to Germany, from Spain to Moldovawill come to Switzerland for a long week full of bad or exciting songs, hotshot parties and Eurovision fun! www.eurovision.tv
MAY 17 - 25
PUERTO VALLARTA PRIDE. PUERTO VALLARTA, MEXICO
For the 12th consecutive year, Puerto Vallarta will welcome the largest LGBT Pride event in the region: Vallarta Pride. Associations, companies and the entire LGBT community have joined together again to organize this event that celebrates the lifestyle diversity of our city in an 8-day festival that will offer arts and culture events, concerts, entertainment, films, fun, lots of partying and our fabulous Pride Parade. www.vallartapride.com
MAY 26-JUN 1
LISBON BEAR PRIDE. LISBON, PORTUGAL
Lisbon Bear Pride is an international encounter for bears and friends in the spectacular city of Lisbon. The long weekend includes parties and fun with optional gastronomic and cultural experiences. www.lisbonbearpride.com
JUN 5-8
TORREMOLINOS GAY PRIDE
Torremolinos Gay Pride is a celebration of gay life on the Spanish Costa del Sol. Torremolinos Pride may be one of the youngest pride events in Spain, but it is quickly establishing itself on the annual gay calendar as a fun Spanish event not to be missed. www.pridetorremolinos.es
the3D’S DINE | DRINK | DANCE
RESTAURANTS
GRAND CENTRAL
160 La Plaza
Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.699.7185
www.grandcentralpalmsprings.com
KOFFI NORTH (3 Additional Locations)
515 N Palm Canyon Dr. Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.416.2244
www.kofficoffee.com
BOOZEHOUNDS PALM SPRINGS
2080 N Palm Canyon Dr. Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.656.0067
www.boozehoundsps.com
1501 UPTOWN
1501 N Palm Canyon Dr. Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.320.1501 www.1501uptown.com
TAC/QUILA
415 N Palm Canyon Dr. Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.417.4471
www.tacquila.com
PS AIR BAR
611 S.Palm Canyon Dr. #22 Palm Springs CA 92262
760.327.7701 www.psairbar.com
TOWNIE BAGELS
650 E Sunny Dunes Rd #5 Palm Springs, CA 92264
760.459.4555
www.towniebagels.com
ON THE MARK
111 N Palm Canyon Dr. #155
Palm Springs CA 92262
760.832.8892
www.onthemarkpalmsprings.com
SHERMAN’S DELI & BAKERY
401 E Tahquitz Canyon Dr. Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.325.1199
www.shermansdeli.com
849
849 N Palm Canyon
Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.325.8490
www.eight4nine.com
THAI SMILE PALM SPRINGS
100 South Indian Canyon Dr. Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.320.5503
www.thaismilepalmsprings.com
TRIO RESTAURANT
707 N Palm Canyon Dr. Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.864.8746
www.triopalmsprings.com
THE TROPICALE
330 E Amado Road
Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.866.1952
www.thetropicale.com
ZIN AMERICAN BISTRO
198 S Palm Canyon Dr. Palm Springs, CA
760.322.6300
www.pszin.com
LULU CALIFORNIA BISTRO
200 S Palm Canyon Dr. Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.327.5858
www.lulupalmsprings.com
EL MIRASOL
140 E Palm Canyon Dr. Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.323.0721
www.elmirasolrestaurants.com
RICK’S RESTAURANT
1973 N Palm Canyon Dr. Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.416.0090
www.ricksrestaurant.biz
PINOCCHIO IN THE DESERT
134 E. Tahquitz Canyon Way
Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.322.3776
www.pinocchiops.com
BLACKBOOK BAR
315 E Arenas Road
Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.832.8497
www.blackbookbar.com
BARS AND NIGHT CLUBS
HUNTERS NIGHTCLUB
302 East Arenas Road, Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.323.0700
www.huntersnightclubs.com
TOUCAN’S TIKI LOUNGE
2100 North Palm Canyon Dr. Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.416.7584
www.toucanstikilounge.com
CHILL BAR
217 E. Arenas Road
Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.327.1079
www.chillbarpalmsprings.com
STREETBAR
224 E. Arenas Road
Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.320.1266
www.psstreetbar.com
THE TOOL SHED
600 E. Sunny Dunes Road, Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.320.3299
www.toolshed-ps.com
QUADZ
200 S Indian Canyon
Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.778.4326
AMP SPORTS LOUNGE
68-718 E. Palm Canyon Dr Cathedral City, CA 92234
760.699.7090
www.ampcatcity.com
ROOST BAR LOUNGE
68718 E Palm Canyon Dr #203 Cathedral City CA 92234
760.507.8495
www.theroostcc.com
ONE ELEVEN BAR
67555 E Palm Canyon Dr A103 Cathedral City, CA 92234
760.537.3111
www.oneelevenbar.com
BARRACKS BAR
67625 E Palm Canyon Dr Cathedral City, CA 92234
760.464.0957
www.barracksps.com
RUNWAY
68300 Gay Resort Dr Cathedral City, CA 92234
760.537.7800
www.runwayccbc.com
REFORMA
333 S. Palm Canyon #2 Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.902.6630
www.reformaps.com
DICK’S
301 E Arenas Road
Palm Springs, CA 92262
760.327.0753
www.dicksps.com
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2025 EVENTS
DATE EVENT
Apr 3
Palms Springs Speaks -- Mary Louise Kelly of NPR
Apr 4-6 Desert Legends Women's Weekend
Apr 5 Faux Fur Ball -- PS Animal Shelter
Apr 9 KGAY night with the Firebirds -- Acrisure Arena
Apr 11
Pat Benatar & Neil Giraldo -Agua Caliente Casino 30th Anniv.
Apr 11-13 Hairspray--Rancho Mirage Amphitheater
Apr 11-13 & 18-20 Coachella 2025 with Lady Gaga
April 11-13 Modern Men: The 70's Show
Apr 12 World Art Day Festival -- Downtown Palm Springs Park
Apr 12 REAF House Party PS: Lights! Camera! Action!
Apr 13 40th Anniversary of The Times of Harvey Milk -- PSCC
Apr 17 Glow with Pride --The Living Desert Zoo and Gardens
Apr 24 2025 Dining Out For Life -- DAP Health
Apr 24-27 Disney Pride in Concert -- PSGMC
Apr 25-27 Stagecoach 2025
Apr 27 Int'l Jazz Day Celebration -- Honoring Phyliss Hyman
May 2-5 Hot Rodeo Palm Springs 2025
May 3 David Sedaris -- Camelot Theatre
May 8 2025 Harvey Milk Diversity Breakfast
May 17 International Day Against Homophobia
May 17 & 18 Long Beach Pride Parade & Festival
May 17 - Jun 8 World Pride
May 30 - Jun 8 Greater Palm Springs Restaurant Week 2025
