The Real Cost of Vacation
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Dear Reader,
As we usher in the new year, we’re filled with the hope and anticipation that comes with fresh beginnings. In this issue, as families gear up for Yeshiva Week and plan their vacations, we’re tackling a topic close to home—what it means to truly get away as a Jew.
Travel is an age-old tradition, whether it’s the journeys of our forefathers, the treks of Chasidic rebbes seeking spiritual clarity, or modern-day family trips for rest and renewal. Yet, for many of us, the idea of a vacation is often complicated by kosher food, Shabbat accommodations, and the unique rhythms of Jewish life. These “restrictions” might feel limiting, but they’re also the keys to rediscovering how meaningful and adventurous Jewish travel can be.
In this issue, we explore how to see the world without compromising who we are—from camping trips and road trips to destinations far beyond
the kosher bubble. We also address the tension between the rising costs of “Jewish vacations” and the beauty of simpler, more intentional experiences. After all, it’s not about how much you spend—it’s about the memories, growth, and connection you bring back.
As we step into 2025, we’re excited to continue bringing you thoughtful perspectives and meaningful stories that resonate with your life. Thank you for being part of our journey this past year. We wish you and your family a year of health, happiness, and inspiration.
Warm regards,
David Rogatsky Editor-in-Chief The Jewish Home Magazine
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Beyond the Headlines
A weekly glimpse into the Israel you won’t read about in the news
Sivan Rahav Meir
Translated by Yehoshua Siskin, Janine Muller Sherr
TODAY’S HEROES VAYIGASH:
“Who is the hero of Chanukah?” Rabbi Captain Shimon Gross asked, opening the Chanukah ceremony at the National Police College in Beit Shemesh. Rabbi Shimon continued: “The hero was that Kohen who hid the small jug of oil in the Beit HaMikdash. He saw only destruction and ruin, hardship and oppression around him, but he still hid a small jug of pure oil because he believed that better days would
come. He knew that someone would eventually come and find it, and relight the Menorah. He knew that more Jews would need this oil, because our story would continue.
“In days of challenge, difficulty, and both national and personal trials, we need to believe that every drop of light is significant, and every small good deed of ours will bring great salvation and gratitude.”
This beautiful message becomes even more powerful when we remember who is saying it. Rabbi Shimon’s face may be familiar to you. He and his wife Michal lost their two young daughters, Avigail and Yael, about a decade ago in “the pesticide tragedy” at their home. I interviewed them in those days, and it was moving to meet him here now, on such a mission, and also to discover that he and Michal have six children.
‘NEVER’ IS HERE!
Some time before Chanukah, I received a remarkable post about Pearl Kronenberg Shafier, aged 96, who had just made Aliyah. Pearl was born in New York in 1928 and devoted much of her life to Jewish education. She was blessed with 84 descendants, and has seen five generations — great-great-grandchildren! She met some of these descendants here in Israel for the very first time.
After watching many of her descendants move to Israel, Pearl eventually decided to follow them. Festive and moving welcome ceremonies were held for her both at Ben Gurion Airport and in Beit Shemesh, where she is living. “This was something that I always wanted to do,” she said. “When people would ask me when I was moving to Israel, I would always say, ‘Never say never.’ Well, never is here!”
YOU CANNOT ERASE THE PAST, BUT YOU CAN CORRECT IT
The previous parasha ended in a cliff-hanger. What will happen next? Will it be possible for Yosef and his brothers to reconnect? Yosef could have revealed himself much earlier in the story and informed his brothers that the Egyptian ruler is none other than their long-lost brother. However, that would have proved to be an embarrassment for everyone; the family would have disintegrated instead of growing into the Jewish nation. It is impossible to erase the fact that they threw Yosef into the pit, abandoning him to be sold into slavery; yet it is possible to make amends and correct past misdeeds. This is called repentance, and our parasha tells how the brothers went through the process.
First, they are remorseful: “Indeed, we are guilty about our brother, that we witnessed the distress of his soul when he begged us, and we did not listen.” However, regret alone is insufficient. In the next stage of repentance, they prove that they
have indeed changed their ways. Yosef plans to imprison Binyamin, the youngest brother, only for Yehudah to jump forward, begging Yosef to take him instead.
This is a demonstration of collective responsibility at the highest level and it corrects the error of abandoning Yosef. By showing unity and solidarity, the brothers prove that they have learned their lesson. Now, and only now, is the setting right for the emotional scene: “And Yosef could not control himself…. And he wept out loud…. And Yosef said to his brothers, ‘I am Yosef. Is my father still alive?’”
Now is the right time for the brothers to be reunited and call for their father Yaakov to come from the Land of Israel. The sin of selling Yosef will always be there, lurking in the background, but once the brothers have successfully passed the test Yosef set for them, they can now look at one another squarely in the eye.
“THEY TOOK AWAY HIS FREEDOM, BUT NOT HIS FAITH”
The Kesher Yehudi organization is in touch with dozens of families of hostages and organizes Shabbatot for them. They spent last Shabbat together at a Jerusalem hotel. Before Shabbat, Shelley Shem Tov, mother of Omer, addressed the participants:
“Omer is still in captivity although his friend Itay who had been kidnapped with him was released earlier on. Itay told us that on Friday night he and Omer took salt from a bag of pretzels, filled a bottle cap with a little bit of grape juice they happened to have, put napkins on their heads, and made Kiddush. That was the moment when they felt closest to home.
“Itay also said that Omer was inspired in that moment to make a commitment to keep Shabbat. What could he do in captivity
on Shabbat anyway? Well, every day at 5 o’clock in the afternoon there was a power outage and they were given flashlights in order to be able to see in the dark. Omer decided to keep Shabbat by not turning on his flashlight on Shabbat.
“I want to tell you that this makes me so proud of my son! They took away his freedom, but not his faith. I know that it’s this faith that keeps him going and protects him. And I am also certain that when he returns, he will say that he felt the power of the prayers and the mitzvot that we did on his behalf!”
You will not hear about this on the news, but I think this is the headline in heaven.
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The Price of Paradise:
Why Jewish Vacations Are So Expensive—
and How to Escape the Kosher Trap
If you’re a Jewish traveler, odds are you’ve faced the Great Kosher Vacation Dilemma. You dream of a far-flung escape, a break from routine, but when you add kosher food, Shabbat accommodations, and “frum-friendly” programming, the costs soar. Before you know it, that week in paradise costs more than a semester of yeshiva tuition.
And yet, thousands of families shell out the money, filling Instagram with envy-inducing photos of Pesach programs, beachfront villas, and kosher cruises. The rest of us watch, feeling left out or, let’s face it, a little resentful. How can some families afford these lavish trips while claiming tuition breaks back home? Why does a “Jewish vacation” have to cost so much?
Spoiler alert: It doesn’t.
We Forgot How to Travel
Jewish travel wasn’t always about comfort and indulgence. Throughout history, Jews traveled for spiritual growth, business, or sheer necessity. Many Chasidic rebbes famously took journeys to rejuvenate their souls, re-
treating to simple lodgings in remote destinations. For them, travel wasn’t about food or luxury—it was about the change of scenery, the clarity of thought, and the reconnection with Hashem that came from stepping outside their daily grind.
Today, though, kosher travel often seems defined by convenience. We’ve grown so accustomed to needing Glatt kosher buffets and on-site minyanim that we avoid destinations where these aren’t guaranteed. This mentality has turned Jewish vacations into a niche industry—and an expensive one at that.
But it doesn’t have to be this way.
Why Jewish Vacations Cost So Much
The kosher travel industry thrives on convenience. Pesach programs, kosher resorts, and Jewish-led tours take the guesswork out of travel, but they come at a premium. You’re not just paying for food or accommodations— you’re paying for the ease of not having to think about logistics.
There’s also a cultural component. Many families see these vaca-
tions as a status symbol, an opportunity to showcase their wealth or commitment to Jewish living. Social media only amplifies this, as parents post photos of their kids on exotic beaches with captions like, “Baruch Hashem, the food here is mehadrin.”
But does it have to be this way? Do you really need a five-star kosher resort to have a meaningful vacation?
Affordable Travel Is Possible
Here’s the truth: Jewish vacations don’t have to break the bank. You just need to change your mindset—and maybe give up a little comfort.
1. Pack Your Own Food
This might sound radical, but it’s how Jews used to travel. Businessmen would pack cans of tuna, matzah, and peanut butter for weeks on the road. Families today can do the same with shelf-stable meals, portable grills, and creative planning.
2. Choose Flexible Destinations
Many mainstream resorts, like Beaches and Club Med, are surprising-
ly accommodating for kosher travelers. They’ll let you use their grills, double-wrap your food, or bring your own kitchenware. The trick is asking—and being willing to make a little effort.
3. Skip the Jewish Bubble
Sometimes, the most meaningful experiences happen when you step outside the frum enclave. Imagine davening in a centuries-old shul in Venice or exploring Jewish history in Morocco. These trips may not have glatt kosher buffets, but they offer something even more valuable: perspective.
4. Redefine What a Vacation Means
Not every vacation needs to involve international flights or luxurious accommodations. A camping trip, a road trip to a nearby city, or a quiet weekend in the mountains can be just as rejuvenating—and far less expensive.
The Kosher Food Obsession
Let’s talk about food. For many Jewish families, the question of “What will we eat?” dominates every travel
plan. This concern is valid but often exaggerated.
One friend of mine bluntly blames Jewish women for the skyrocketing costs of kosher vacations. His theory? Jewish men—accustomed to traveling for business—are more willing to rough it, eating simple meals or cooking for themselves. Jewish women, he claims, prioritize food and convenience, pushing families toward more expensive options.
Whether you agree with his take or not, there’s some truth to the idea that we’ve made food the centerpiece of our travel plans. But does it have to be?
Think about the rebbes who traveled to remote destinations with nothing but bread and water. Their journeys weren’t about gourmet meals—they were about spiritual nourishment, reconnecting with Hashem through new experiences and quiet reflection.
Perhaps it’s time we shifted our focus.
The PTO Problem
For observant Jews working in secular jobs, vacation planning comes with an extra layer of stress: paid time off. Between Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Sukkot, Pesach, and Shavuot, many Jews burn through their PTO just to observe the chagim.
This leaves little room for actual vacations, forcing some to choose between missing work or missing out on travel. It’s a frustrating dilemma, and one that highlights how challenging it can be to balance Jewish observance with modern work demands.
Reclaiming the Meaning of Travel
At its core, travel is about stepping outside your routine, experiencing the world in new ways, and coming back
changed. It’s not about luxury, Instagram likes, or all-you-can-eat buffets.
Jewish tradition teaches us the power of changing your place to change your perspective. M’shaneh makom, m’shaneh mazal—change your place, change your luck. Whether you’re walking through the streets of Jerusalem, hiking a mountain, or exploring a new culture, travel has the power to transform.
The Other Side of the Coin
Of course, not every trip needs to be an exercise in self-denial. If kosher options are available and within your budget, there’s no reason to avoid them. There’s value in being comfortable, especially when traveling with young children or large families.
The problem arises when we equate comfort with necessity—or when we judge others for the vacations they choose. Not everyone can afford a kosher cruise or a Pesach program, but that doesn’t mean their vacations are any less valuable.
The Takeaway
Vacations are an opportunity—not just to relax, but to grow. Whether you’re staying in a luxury resort or eating tuna sandwiches in a tent, the goal should be the same: to experience the world Hashem created, deepen your connections to those around you, and return home with new perspectives.
As Jewish travelers, we have the tools to make any destination meaningful. With a little creativity, flexibility, and willingness to step outside our comfort zones, we can reclaim the true purpose of travel—and make it accessible to everyone.
Because in the end, it’s not about where you go or how much you spend. It’s about what you bring back.
Yoel’s Lemonade Stand
The Hidden Truth About Marketing
And What Kosher Vacations Can Teach Us About It
If you’ve ever priced a kosher vacation package, you know it can cost more than redeeming the Jews from Egypt (and involve almost as much planning). But hidden within this seemingly mundane fact lies a profound secret about marketing that any Jewish business owner should understand.
The late Israeli Nobel laureate Daniel Kahneman, whose insights have revolutionized how we understand human decision-making, posed an intriguing question during one of his TED talks:
Imagine planning on attending the perfect Pesach kosher vacation –the finest hotel, excursions, the best mashgiach, and glatt kosher meals that would make your grandmother kvell. Now, what if, at the end of this magnificent vacation, your memory would be erased completely, like chametz for Pesach? Would you still choose the same vacation?
This isn’t just a theoretical exercise. It reveals something fundamental about how people make decisions –and, by extension, how we should market our businesses.
You see, according to Kahneman, humans (a category even your customers fall into) have two distinct selves: the experiencing self that lives in the moment, and the remembering self that tells the story later at the Shabbos table.
But here’s the fascinating part –it’s the remembering self that makes all the decisions, including what to buy and how much to spend.
Think about it: Why do people spend small fortunes on kosher vacation packages? They’re not just buying the experience – they’re buying the memories they’ll share, the stories they’ll tell, the photos they’ll show their grandchildren (not to mention the bragging rights on Instagram). They’re buying what Kahneman calls “anticipatory
utility.” (I like to refer to it as “the joy of looking forward to something).”
This has profound implications for how you should market your businesses:
1. People don’t buy products or services – they buy stories they can tell about them. That fancy sheitel? It’s not about the hair, it’s about the story of how special it makes the wearer feel.
2. The anticipation of a purchase can be more valuable than the purchase itself. When marketing your business, don’t just sell the product – sell the anticipation of owning it.
3. How something ends matters more than the average experience. A remarkable ending to a customer interaction will be remembered more than a consistently good but unremarkable experience
For the Jewish business owner, this wisdom should resonate particularly deeply.
Our entire tradition is built on remembering and anticipating – from remembering the exodus from Egypt to anticipating the coming of Moshiach.
So, whether you’re running a kosher restaurant, a Judaica store, or a real estate business, understand that your customers aren’t just buying your product or service – they’re buying the Mariachi band that plays Jewish songs (I’m looking at you Lenny).
In other words, stop selling features and start selling memories.
That’s a lesson worth remembering – even if you’re not planning a kosher vacation anytime soon.
Justin Oberman is the Marketing Director and Marketing Editor of the LA Jewish Home and is the Co-Founder of a personal branding ad agency called Genius Scouts. He can be contacted at justin@geniusscouts.com
Justin Oberman
Diplomacy and Delusion: Lessons from Chanukah and Carter To the Editor
Throughout our history, the Jewish people have always showed respect and engaged in diplomacy with the leader of whichever country in exile we resided in. Former President Jimmy Carter, who passed away last Sunday at the age of 100, wasn’t our friend. But he brokered a peace treaty between Israeli Prime Minister Menachem Begin and Egyptian President Anwar El-Sadat which holds to this day, albeit shakily. Bogged down by high inflation, the Iranian hostage crises, and an energy crises (sweaters, anyone?), Carter sought to save his legacy. Who have world leaders historically turned to as a scapegoat for their own troubles? The Jews. Farmer Jimmy spend the last decades of his life trying to solve the Middle East crises by painting Israel as an apartheid state which must cede land to the “Palestinians” for the sake of peace. How careful we have to be then to be diplomatic but not delude ourselves into thinking that any one ruler is our savior or downfall! As it says in Melachim II, do not fear the blasphemy of the foreign king. We don’t know what Trump will do to close the deal or save his legacy. The lessons we learned from Chanukah must carry us through the year, the next election cycle and beyond: live peacefully amongst the nations when you can, but don’t get too close to the foreign flame. May the menorah shine bright always.
Chaim Yehuda Meyer
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Craving Connection
Dovi Teitelbaum
On It’s cold outside – well, cold for LA. The sky is a disconsolate gray, the kind that makes you want to bundle up in bed or on your couch. I’m trudging home along Pico, hoping to do just that, when something unusual catches my eye. I stop to take in my surroundings.
A Sephardi mother in a snood smiles as she passes by – she is pushing a stroller with her left hand and holding a toddler’s hand in her right. Doing a 360, I see at least two other stroller-pushing moms with their husbands in tow. They are all smiling, genuinely happy, and gravitating toward this great big sound in the distance. As I follow in their steps, I see throngs of people—young couples, families, grandparents, and kids—all playing with their best friends.
And, like gravity, as we get closer, the throngs move faster as each person finds somebody they know and runs to embrace them.
When I finally reach Doheny, the epicenter, I can see the whole spectacle. This is an enormous event. There are booths serving all kinds of food, from cotton candy and popcorn to chicken fingers and hamburgers. There are, what appears to be, several hundred chairs set up. And there is an enormous stage with a full band. Multiple blocks of Pico are cordoned off. (How do we accomplish this? Through some minor miracles, no less.)
Everyone is so happy. But why?
Don’t they know what’s going on in the world? Don’t they see the rise of antisemitism growing more intense and widespread by the day? Don’t they understand how precarious our very existence is in these times? Do they not know the great risks that our brothers and sisters take every moment while serving in the IDF?
I can’t help but wonder—are these people naïve, oblivious to our troubles?
No. As I stand there amidst the
joy, I realize something profound. These people, in their laughter, in their celebration, possess a kind of wisdom that I hadn’t yet fully understood. They aren’t ignorant; they’re embracing the deeper truth that joy and connection are, perhaps, the most powerful responses to adversity.
I move closer to the stage where a concert is about to begin. And just as the music kicks off, I spot my friend Rabbi Chaim Teleshevsky (by his distinct beard, no less). He’s holding his son on his shoulders, both of them smiling widely. I ask him what he thinks of the event. With his son grinning from the top of his head, he responds, “It is so joyous—bringing so much simcha to the streets of LA.”
As Jews, we are quite a unique people. We are survivalists led by our hearts. Every moment for us is a celebration of life, of what we have. And, at this moment, surrounded by several hundred beautiful souls, I realized we had each other—and, ultimately, that is everything.
Just then, a performer on stage urges the crowd to say a prayer for Rabbi Chaim Cunin’s daughter, who miraculously survived a terrible fire in her seminary dormitory. Moments later, what can only be described as a holy-looking man walks past me. Rabbi Teleshevsky waves him over and introduces him as Rabbi Chaim Cunin. Exhausted but radiant with gratitude, Rabbi Cunin tells me how happy he is to be here, how full of joy he is. He pulls me aside, grabs my arm, and gives me a bracha that I should “write only good news.”
Then Joey Newcomb began his performance. He started by giving a shout-out to Esti Cohen, a girl who had come to this annual Chanukah concert on Pico every single year but could not make it this time because she had suffered an accident. He put her live on his phone, from the stage, telling her, “We bring the whole Pico vibe to you.”
Shaindy Plotzker Ignites the Stage
A Magical Night for EFRAT in Los Angeles
By Tova Point
On December 18, the Saban Theatre in Los Angeles buzzed with anticipation as a sold-out crowd of 2,000 women and girls gathered for a groundbreaking event. EFRAT, the organization dedicated to empowering expectant mothers in distress, hosted its first-ever West Coast benefit concert. Headlined by Shaindy Plotzker, the evening was a powerful mix of unity, inspiration, and electrifying music.
In what became the largest women’s-only event ever held in LA, attendees arrived from across the city and as far as Las Vegas and Arizona. The diverse audience included women and girls from various walks of life, some of whom were drawn by Shaindy’s messages of Jewish pride and community. Ahead of the concert, Plotzker fans visited local schools to teach students her songs, ensuring an unforgettable, participatory experience for everyone.
The event’s emcee, celebrated lecturer and social media personality Rebbetzin Yaffa Palti, set the tone for the night with her dynamic presence. Yaffa, who was instrumental in connecting EFRAT with Shaindy Plotzker, emphasized the shared mission of both. “EFRAT doesn’t just save lives—it transforms them,” she said. “For mothers, having the baby they deeply desire is life-changing.”
A Night to Remember
From the first note, the concert exceeded expectations. Highlights included a captivating performance by 250 girls onstage alongside Shaindy, who described the crowd as “palpably electric.” “The energy was so powerful, it felt like the balcony was shaking!” she exclaimed. But beyond the excitement, she noted, was something more profound: “We saw women and girls from all backgrounds join together in song and dance, arms around one another. That energy of sisterhood embodies EFRAT’s mission to empower women and create meaning.”
A particularly moving moment came when Shaindy invited the audience to turn on their phone flashlights. As the theater illuminated with 2,000 points of light, she shared, “Every one of us carries a unique light to shine in the world. This is what EFRAT teaches: every life has value, and every soul matters. Together, we can bring more life and light into the world.”
The evening also brought tangible results for EFRAT’s mission. Many attendees left inspired to donate and support the organization, and each participant received a baby bottle to use as a pushke (charity box). “This allows even children to contribute to saving Jewish lives,” said Nir Salomon, EFRAT’s Executive Director.
Credited to EFRAT
Photos
The Impact of EFRAT
For more than 40 years, EFRAT has been a lifeline for women in Israel facing unplanned pregnancies. Often grappling with economic challenges, these women receive moral support, counseling, and practical aid. EFRAT’s comprehensive care package includes essentials like cribs, strollers, diapers, and formula, along with two years of monthly supplies for the baby. Remarkably, the cost of saving a life through EFRAT amounts to just $1,500, and donors are personally informed of the names and birthdates of the children they help bring into the world.
To date, EFRAT has supported over 84,000 births. “Our mission is to empower women to embrace motherhood and thrive,” Salomon said. “Shaindy Plotzker’s influence helped us showcase that commitment to thousands of young women building their own families now or in the future.”
Looking Ahead
Buoyed by the success of the LA concert, EFRAT has plans for another event in New York, where Shaindy promises a night of inspiration and purpose. “It’s not just about the music,” she said. “It’s about spreading Jewish light and supporting EFRAT’s mission to transform lives.”
“I am booking a hotel trip to be over Shabbos. All the hotels seem to have electronic doors with no regular mechanical key options, what can be done?”
Keycards or magnetic stripe cards are commonly used in hotels as an alternative to the old-fashioned mechanical key. The swiping of the card activates an electric magnetic field to unlock the door.
There is a well-known debate if activating an electrical current on Shabbos is an issur d’rabanan (rabbinical violation) or an issur m’doraisa (biblical violation).1 Most poskim hold that activating an electrical current that does not start a spark or fire, (like red hot wires) is only an issur d’rabanan 2
Thus, by opening the door involves the activation of electricity and therefore a Jew may not use such a card on Shabbos or yom tov. The card is also muktzeh since it is ‘kli shemelachto l’issur’ (a vessel intended for forbidden work) and may not be carried on Shabbos under normal circumstances.3
1 The Chazon Ish (siman 50 sif katan 9) holds that classic turning on a switch or starting some electrical current is a form of 'binyan' (building, one of the 39 forbidden melachos of Shabbos) since it closes an electrical circuit. Rav Elyashiv also ruled stringently not to allow a nonJew to activate non flame electricity even when it is in place of discomfort or a big loss, (see Orchas Shabbos vol. 3 pg. 59).
2 The view of R' Shlomo Zalman Auerbach (Minchas Shlomo 1:11) famously held that turning on electrical current which does not start fire or red-hot wires is only a rabbinical Shabbos violation. See also Minchas Yitzchak (1:20; 3:23). Many poskim rely on this approach, at least in time of great need.
3 See Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chayim 308:3)
Ask the Rabbi
Hotel on Shabbos
R’ Dovid Bressman
Telling a non-Jew to Open the Door
May a hotel guest ask a nonJew to open the door for them on Shabbos with the electric keycard? Before answering the question, we need to understand why in general it is Rabbinically forbidden to tell a non-Jew to do a melacha (forbidden Shabbos act) on our behalf.
There are three reasons brought in the Rishonim: a) the nonJew is acting as the Jew’s shliach (messenger);4 b) on the verse (Shemos 12:16) “no work may not be performed on them” the wording implies that even if Shabbos or Yom Tov work was done by a non-Jew it is still forbidden. This reason is an asmachta (a hint from a verse, but Rabbinical).5 c) Shabbos should not be light in a Jew’s eyes if they can freely have a non-Jew do Melacha (forbidden work) for them, and this will lead them to violate Shabbos directly themselves.6
If we define the act of the keycard as a rabbinical violation, we could rely upon the rule of telling the non-Jew to open the door for us since it is a ‘shvus d’shvus’ (a double rabbinical violation) in place of a very great need, or a mitzvah or if one is partially sick.7
4 Rashi to Avoda Zara 21a
5 Sma"g (Lo Saseh 75).
6 Rambam (Hilchos Shabbos 6:1). Shulchan Aruch Admur Hazaken (Orach Chayim 243:1) writes that this reason from the Rambam is the main reason of why amira lenachri is forbidden.
7 Telling a non-Jew to do a violation is a shvus (rabbinical violation), and telling a non-Jew to do a rabbinical violation is second shvus. We follow the rule that one may rely on 'shvus d'shvus' is not rabbinically forbidden when the matter is very important or mitzvah related or related to partial sickness. See Shulchan
However, if we assume that using the keycard on Shabbos is touching upon a Biblical violation, we cannot rely on openly asking the non-Jew to open the door for us.8
Putting Oneself in a Problematic Shabbos Situation
May one plan to spend Shabbos somewhere where one knows that one will need to rely upon asking a non-Jew to activate the keycard for them on Shabbos?
The purpose of amira l’nachri (telling a non-Jew to violate Shabbos for them) is only allowed in a post facto situation, however one may not purposely set oneself up in a situation where they know that they will need to ask a non-Jew to do work for them on Shabbos.9
In fact, the Gr”a10 writes that one is obligated to give over his money in order not to transgress on a shvus
Aruch (Orach Chayim 307:5). See also Shulchan Aruch (Admur Hazaken 307:12)
8 Minchas Yitzchak 10:29 was concerned that the electric keycards could be a biblical violation on Shabbos therefore to have a non-Jew opening the door should not be relied upon unless a very pressing need similar to needing to enter a restroom (see Shabbos 81a) "three sharpened stones may be taken into the bathroom [on Shabbos] " - carrying stones used for the restroom on Shabbos for the sake of 'kavod habrios' (honor of the person). Minchas Yitzchak concludes that one needs to analyze if one has a proper valid reason to leave their hotel room and to come on to having a non-Jew doing a violation for them.
9 See Shavet Halevi (9:68) – a hotel has many Shabbos problems with regard to electricity, therefore one who wants to protect their soul should stay away from these issues altogether.
10 See Biur HaGr"a (Yoreh Deah 157:4); Pischei Teshuva ibid:4.
(Rabbinical violation) of Shabbos like amira l’nachri.
Therefore, initially, if possible, one should avoid arranging to stay at a hotel which has a keycard.
Five Potential Solutions for a Locked Keycard Door
on Shabbos
One who will be staying at such a hotel; the best solution would be to leave the door unlocked by placing some tape in the way to prevent the door from fully closing. If one is afraid of having items stolen, one can place their valuables in a safety box which is usually available at the front desk. Another experimental potential option is to tie before Shabbos a string around the door handle (from inside the room) and have the string under the door so when can pull it out and yank the door open from the hallway. This can be tricky and it might not work unless one is a bit crafty.
If one feels they must lock their door, they could arrange with the hotel to enter the room when the maid is going to be cleaning the room. The maid will thus open the door for their own need. If it is not possible, one could ‘convince’ the non-Jewish worker in the hotel that it is worth it for them to open the hotel door for the Jew. One could say, “There is a drink or a chocolate in my room for you, why don’t you go there with me to get it.”11 Alternatively, one
11 See Aruch Hashulchan (Orach Chayim 276:9) writes that the custom is when one needs the help of a non-Jew on Shabbos with lights to invite him to the house to give him some gift so that the non-Jew will light the light for his own needs to see. See also Orchos Shabbos Chapter 23 foootnote 70.
could do ‘remez shelo bederech tzivui’ (a hint which is not by way of commanding the non-Jew); to hint without openly telling the non-Jew to open the door, for example, one could say “ I cannot enter my room since I am not allowed to use the keycard on Shabbos.”12
Conclusion
When traveling we need to be mindful of Shabbos observance and not erroneously assume that halacha allows a non-Jew to do any act for us on Shabbos we wish. The best option is not to stay in a hotel where we will need to rely on having a nonJew open are electric keycard door for us. If we are staying there, the best option is to keep the door open without the need to have a non-Jew activate the keycard for us. If the door was locked and we needed to get into our room, there was room to be lenient to have the non-Jew open the door by leaving a gift in the room, so that the non-Jew will be opening the door for themselves. One could also give a hint without instructing the non-Jew to open the door, such as saying, “ I cannot open this door on Shabbos.
12 See Magen Avraham (307:31) and Shulchan Aruch Admur Hazaken (Orach Chayim 307:7). Practically, it would best to arrange with the nonJewish hotel staff before Shabbos and explain and stipulate that one needs to enter their room (if it gets locked) so that a non-Jewish staff member will open the door.
Rabbi Dovid Bressman authored two halacha books on mezuzah and
Yadin from Central Tomchei Tmimim Brooklyn NY. He is also an ordained sofer and
and the director
Chesed Umishpat which assists on Jewish status matters. You can reach him at jewishchesedumishpat@gmail.com
sefer torah. He has Yoreh Yoreh and Yadin
magiah
of
A Community Protecting A Community
Ari Stock
Dear reader, we spoke about the outside of your home and area. Now let’s talk about your actual home.
With rising crime rates and an increasing reliance on technology, it’s crucial to take proactive steps to safeguard your family and property. Here are some pointers for a simple home security checklist to help you identify potential vulnerabilities and enhance your overall preparedness, a lot of these things you might be already doing.
Exterior Assessment:
• Walk the perimeter: Inspect your property from the outside. Look for easily accessible windows and doors, overgrown landscaping that could provide hiding spots and unsecured entry points like garages or sheds.
Interior Fortifications:
• Secure entry points: Reinforce doors and windows with strong locks, security bars, or reinforced glass.
Emergency Preparedness:
• Develop a family emergency plan: Discuss potential threats and create a plan for different scenarios, such as fires, natural disasters, or intruders.
• Lighting is key: Ensure adequate outdoor lighting around entrances, walkways, and dark corners. Consider motion-activated lights for added deterrence.
• Visibility matters. Trim bushes and trees to improve visibility around your home. This will make it harder for intruders to conceal themselves.
• Smart home integration: Explore smart home devices like security cameras, smart locks, and alarm systems. These technologies offer remote monitoring, real-time alerts, and enhanced control over your home’s security.
• Stay informed: Keep up-to-date on local crime rates and safety advisories. Attend community safety events and workshops to learn about the latest security measures.
By taking these proactive steps, you can significantly enhance your home’s security and create a safer environment for your family. Just to remind you, prevention is key.
LET’$ Grow WIth Lorenzo
Vision Over Vacations: Reimagining
How You Afford the Best Life
In today’s world of social media highlight reels filled with infinity pools and overwater bungalows, it’s easy to fall into the trap of focusing on what we can’t afford. But this mindset is precisely what keeps most of us from experiencing the luxury vacations we desire.
The secret lies not in obsessing over budget travel tips or lamenting the cost of first-class flights, but in fundamentally shifting how we think about luxury experiences. When we fixate on our inability to afford premium vacations, we unknowingly program our minds for limitation.
Consider this: If you spend hours scrolling through “budget travel hacks” or calculating how to squeeze a vacation out of minimal funds, you’re actually reinforcing scarcity in your thinking.
Your mind begins taking the form of limitation, attracting more of the same. So, what should you do instead? Dare to dream luxuriously and fix your attention on the best possible experiences.
This isn’t about magical thinking –it’s about psychological positioning. When you allow yourself to visualize staying at that five-star resort in the Maldives, your mind begins working on ways to make it possible rather than reasons why it’s impossible.
The key is to combine this visioning with genuine gratitude for your current circumstances.
Gratitude acts as a mental catalyst. A grateful mind naturally fixes itself upon the best outcomes and, through expectation, develops the faith necessary for achievement. Each wave of thanksgiving strengthens your belief in what’s possible. Without this foundation of gratitude, sustaining the faith needed for creation becomes impossible.
Think of it this way: Just as health isn’t achieved by studying disease, abundance isn’t created by mastering scarcity. The conventional approach of endless budget comparisons and compromise-focused planning reinforces the very limitations you’re trying to overcome.
Don’t get me wrong. This doesn’t mean ignoring practical financial planning. It’s just a repositioning of it. Instead of asking, “How can I afford this?” ask, “What would make this possible?” This subtle shift moves your mind from problem-focused to solution-oriented thinking.
Need help thinking this way. Here are some tips:
1. Create a dedicated time each day to visualize your ideal vacation experiences.
Feel the sun on your face at that exclusive beach resort. Imagine the taste of that perfect meal at a Michelin-starred restaurant. Let yourself fully embrace these visions while maintaining deep gratitude for your current circumstances.
2. Simultaneously, stop consuming content that reinforces scarcity thinking.
Unfollow budget travel accounts that constantly emphasize limitation. Remove yourself from conversations that dwell on the impossibility of luxury experiences. Instead, surround yourself with images, ideas, and people that align with your vision of abundance.
Things are not brought into being by thinking about their opposites.
Your luxury vacation won’t materialize through masterful budgeting of limited resources, but through expanding your mind’s capacity to envision and accept abundance.
Start today by refusing to dwell on limitations and instead cultivating a wealthy mindset that naturally attracts the experiences you desire.x
Lorenzo Nourafchan is the CEO of Northstar Financial Consulting Group, a full-service Accounting, tax, and fractional CFO firm specializing in Proactive Financial Strategies for businesses and families. He can be reached at lorenzo@nstarfinance. com
DA Fani Willis Isn’t Holier Than Thou
On December 19, 2024, The Georgia Court of Appeals removed Fulton County District Attorney Fani Willis from the Georgia election interference case against Donald Trump and others. This was a critical victory for Trump because it is the only case out of his four criminal cases that carries mandatory prison time (5 years) if he is convicted.
The issue before the court was related to a romantic relationship that Willis had with special prosecutor Nathan Wade, whom she had hired to lead the case. He was paid over $653,000.00 in tax-payer money to join the case with Willis. The other two special prosecutors she hired were paid $73,000.00 and $90,000.00.
The trial court judge ruled that either Willis or Wade would have to recuse themselves from the case. Trump appealed the decision and argued that they both should be removed from the case. The Georgia Court of Appeals agreed with Trump and said in a 2-1 ruling that “this is the rare case in which disqualification is mandated and no other remedy will suffice to restore public confidence in the integrity of these proceedings.”
Willis is appealing the decision to the Georgia Supreme Court but it is uncertain if the court will even take up the case.
The irony is that Willis’ prosecution against Trump was about dishonesty and teaming up with others (Racketeering Statute) to carry out such acts. Former Fulton County Assistant District Attorney and district attorney candidate Christian Wise Smith summed it up as follows: “As a former assistant district attorney in Fulton County who has dedicated my career to pursuing justice, the decision to disqualify Willis and her entire office from the Trump case strikes me as more than just a legal setback; it’s a profound disappointment for our justice system and the citizens of Fulton County.
Having served as a Fulton County prosecutor and as a prosecutor for the city of Atlanta, and having challenged Willis for her position in this year’s Democratic primary, I
understand the immense responsibility that comes with wielding prosecutorial power. Public trust isn’t just earned through the cases we choose to pursue, but it’s also earned in the way we conduct ourselves and manage our offices.
Whether you agree with the court disqualifying Willis or not, the court wouldn’t have been in a position to make that decision if she hadn’t hired Wade in the first place. Several of my former colleagues were well equipped to do the work she hired Wade to do.
The disqualification of DA Willis and her office doesn’t just impact this single case — as significant as it is. It undermines public confidence in our justice system and raises legitimate questions, yet again, about her prosecutorial judgment. The relationship between Willis and Wade, along with the financial arrangements surrounding his appointment, created an appearance of impropriety that could have and should have been avoided.”
The appearance of impropriety arguably goes beyond the Georgia case. How does it look when a President pardons his son, but when referring to Trump, states that “no one is above the law”? How does it look when the Department of Justice prosecutes Trump for mishandling classified documents, and looks the other way when his political opponent left classified documents in his home garage? How does it look when a New York DA novelly prosecutes a misdemeanor case as a felony, in order to circumvent the statute of limitations?
The idea that those prosecuting Trump are holier than thou is coming to a head. Perhaps the strongest proof that they are losing the public’s trust and confidence are the November 2024 election results. As Thomas Jefferson famously said, “A single zealot may commence prosecutor, and better men be his victims.”
Lou Shapiro is a criminal defense attorney-certified specialist and legal analyst, but most importantly, makes the end-of-shul announcements at Adas Torah. He can be reached at LouisJShapiro@gmail. com.
Lorenzo Nourafchan
2024’s Five Best Books About Israel
Moshe Phillips
Manybooks about Israel were published in 2024. These are the standouts. One need not agree with everything that the authors say (I certainly don’t) to acknowledge that these books are worth reading as they help readers explore ideas they may not read elsewhere. As Israel continues to fight an increasingly unprecedented war against Islamic terrorism, the Jewish State, at the same time, must fight on the battlefield of ideas. That Israel’s right to defend its civilians is being questioned every day all around the world demonstrates how important books that rise beyond rhetoric are, and these books do.
One Jewish State: The Last, Best Hope to Resolve the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict is by former United States Ambassador to Israel (2017 –2021) David Friedman.
With over 23 chapters, plus supporting documents included as appendices, Freidman makes the argument that Israel must not allow the creation of a Palestinian Arab state in any of the areas it liberated in 1967 and now controls. He writes, “Palestine was never a country and never governed itself.” Friedman places the blame for Israel’s current situation on its politicians and writes, “Every Israeli government speaks about the importance of Israel retaining at least parts of Judea and Samaria. But none has presented a vision of how that will be achieved.”
The Battle for the Jewish State: How Israel—and America—Can Win is by Victoria Coates, who is a former staffer with the National Security Council.
From the first chapter of the book, Coates exposes Mahmoud Abbas and his Palestinian Authority as the extremists they are and defends the first Trump administration’s record in the Middle East. Her perspective as a Christian and a national security expert makes this a unique read. The Iron Dome, Coates explains, “in some ways, have made Israel the victim of its own success. When Hamas fired more than two thousand rockets at Israel during the eleven-day Gaza war in 2021, for example, Iron Dome had a more than 90% success rate intercepting them...” Then she explains that demands for a ceasefire from the Biden White House and Netanyahu’s acquiescence caused unexpected consequences. “In hindsight, that was the moment when Hamas’s leader Yahya Sinwar, realizing that the Iron Dome had rendered its missiles and rockets largely useless, started planning for a very different sort of attack on Israel,” Coates opines.
Make Peace: A Strategic Guide for Achieving Lasting Peace In Israel is by Rabbi Elisha Pearl.
As the book itself explains on its cover, it is “Based on The Teachings of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson.” To those only casually acquainted with Chabad, the ideas presented may be more than a bit surprising. Rabbi Pearl shreds calls for a ceasefire and the surrender of Israeli territory for promises on paper for peace. He makes passionate demands for Jewish unity and Jewish education. Also revealed are the Rebbe’s views on Jewish settlements. “Perhaps you have heard that I spoke of the absolute necessity to settle all of the territories at once,” quotes Pearl from a 1977 letter that continues, “especially those disputed by the nations of the world.” One specific section of the book that is particularly done well is where Pearl explains that each of the next generation of replacements for Abbas are just as bad for Israel. At its center, the book calls for “subduing enemies until they no longer pose a threat” and “the protection of Jewish lives.”
Israel Victory: How Zionists Win Acceptance and Palestinians Get Liberated is by historian Daniel Pipes.
Perhaps Pipes is at his best when he reviews history. As he depicts Israeli history over the 30 years and the disastrous Oslo Accords, he writes, “Israelis experimented with such statecraft exotica as “painful concessions” and unilateral withdrawals.” Less effective is Pipes when he presents his ideas for the future, although even here, he starts well enough calling for the “abandoning (of) conciliation and returning to the eternal verities of war. I call this Israel Victory. More negatively, but more accurately, it consists of Palestinian defeat. Summing up: Palestinians lose, Israel wins.” He also calls for an end to not just Hamas but also the Palestinian Authority. Pipes writes that Israel will be able to “convince Palestinians to end their campaign of rejectionism” after their defeat, but he fails to really explain how. Pipes writes that “No Palestinian people existed through the centuries,” but he stubbornly refuses to offer ideas about
Black Saturday: An Unfiltered Account of the October 7th Attack on Israel and the War in Gaza is by Fox News journalist Trey Yingst.
what comes after Hamas and the PA no longer exist. He writes, “Israel must use force, but it cannot look to force as the solution to rejectionism. Its power offers a wide range of levers with which to exert influence over Palestinians, from economics to religion.” His arguments, in this vein, fall to impress. of civilians from Be’eri by Hamas terrorists. It is a powerful and haunting narrative.
This book differs in many ways from the others included here. Yingst tells some of his stories as an on-the-spot journalist visiting places like the infamous Al-Shifa hospital, and it is a gripping tale. “I had to make sure that our coverage wasn’t demonizing Palestinians,” writes Yingst “Some Palestinians entered Israel to slaughter Israelis, some entered to loot, some to look around. Others never entered but cheered when hostages were brought back to Gaza. Others, albeit quietly, condemned the actions of Hamas ...” Yingst does not offer real examples of these “others.” What he does offer an example of is the kidnapping
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After a year in which President Biden was spotted holding a copy of extremist Rashid Khalidi’s The Hundred Years’ War on Palestine: A History of Settler Colonialism and Resistance, 1917-2017, every supporter of Israel should do more to help promote books that offer thoughtful ideas about the Jewish State.
Moshe Phillips is national chairman of Americans For A Safe Israel (www.AFSI.org), a leading pro-Israel advocacy and education organization.
Evolving Connections:
“If you believe breaking is possible, believe fixing is possible”
- Rabbi Nachman of Breslav
Jessie Alyesh,
AMFT, M.S. Ed.
Being a parent to pre-teens and teenagers can be both rewarding and challenging. As our kids grow into their own identities, communication often takes on new layers. Sometimes, it feels like doors are closing, but the good news is that those doors can always open again with care and intention. Thankfully, Jewish wisdom offers timeless lessons for navigating this phase of life with love, patience, and connection.
Taped on the wall above my desk at work as a school counselor, is one of my favorite quotes by Rabbi Nachman of Breslov, “If you believe breaking is possible, believe fixing is possible.”. I very often, throughout the day, pause and take a look at these words and remind myself of the deeper meaning of this statement. As I navigate complicated and messy situations with students or even with my own kids at home (ranging in age 1-14), I am comforted by those words. It reminds me that even when communication feels strained or when our teens push us away, there’s always a path toward repairing and deepening our bond. We just need to approach the conversation with hope and the belief that healing is possible.
The first step is to truly listen. In Judaism, we place immense value on sh’ma—listening with intention. Kids and adults, no matter how old they are, want to feel heard. Instead of asking yes-or-no questions, try open-ended ones like, “What’s been exciting for you lately?” or “What’s been on your mind at school?” This shows them that their thoughts and feelings matter. Even if the answer is just a shrug or a few words, keep the door open and let them know you’re there for them. I also remind myself that sometimes, just sitting in the discomfort and silence is, in effect, listening.
It’s important to remember that most teens act like they don’t want to spend time with their parents, but deep down, they really do. They may roll their
eyes at the suggestion of a family outing or a game night, but those shared moments—however small—can mean the world to them. Even just sitting in the same room together, whether watching a show or folding laundry, can create a sense of closeness. Sometimes, it’s not about having an in-depth conversation but about simply being together, showing them with your presence that they are a priority. I have found that when I am feeling very challenged and pushed to my limit with one of my children, I take them on a car ride to run an “errand”and just that action can lower the flame on the tension between us.
It’s also okay to admit you don’t have all the answers. In Jewish tradition, learning and growing are lifelong pursuits, and it’s fine to let your kids see that you’re figuring things out, too. Share your own experiences, but focus on creating a safe space for them to share theirs. Avoid jumping in with quick fixes or judgments. Instead, ask, “How can I support you right now?” or “What do you think would help?”. Connection often happens when we least expect it. Sitting together for Shabbat dinner, lighting candles, or even walking the dog can spark meaningful conversations. These shared moments don’t have to be formal—they just need to feel natural.
Finally, always lead with love and reassurance. Remind them often, “I’m here for you, no matter what.” It’s okay if they brush it off or act like they don’t care—they’re still hearing it, and it matters. Rabbi Nachman’s words remind us to keep believing in the possibility of connection, even when it feels like the bond is stretched thin.
Teen years may be full of ups and downs, but they’re also filled with opportunities to strengthen the unique, sacred relationship you share with your child. Believe in the fixing, lean into the love, and trust that every small moment matters. It is in those small moments that create lasting impressions and memories. Cherish them.
Reconnecting Hearts: Exploring Cutoff & Reconciliation
Parshat Vayigash
Parshat Vayigash, nestled in the heart of Yosef’s story, is a powerful account of familial strife, emotional cutoff, and ultimately, the profound journey towards reconciliation. This story not only provides a glimpse into the complexities of human relationships but also offers profound insights into the corrosiveness of emotional cutoff and the transformative power of reconciliation.
Parshat Vayigash opens with the words “Vayigash eilav Yehuda” — “And Yehuda drew near him.” Yehuda steps forward to intercede on behalf of Binyamin with an impassioned plea reflecting the emotional intensity of the familial ties that had been strained and severed over the years.
Emotional cutoff, a concept in Family Systems Theory, refers to the distancing or detachment that individuals sometimes employ as a coping mechanism when faced with unresolved emotional issues within their families. In the case of Yosef and his brothers, the initial sale into slavery served as a traumatic rupture that led to emotional cutoff. Murray Bowen, the founder of Family Systems Theory explained, “Emotional cutoffs hinder the development of emotional intelligence, preventing individuals from fully engaging in meaningful relationships.” The brothers, haunted by guilt, chose to distance themselves emotionally, creating a wound that festered over time.
The Parsaha introduces a profound turning point. The cutoff that had persisted for years is confronted, and the brothers are forced to grapple with the weight of their past actions. Vayigash means to draw near. The Torah is teaching us that to move in the direction of reconciliation is literally to move toward one another. Even if we are unable to fully meet, to fully fix what’s broken, we can begin to make a difference by stepping forward. In the dance of relationships, reconciliation is the graceful step that allows the music of understanding to play on.
Ramban asks why Yehuda felt the need to repeat the entire story to Yosef, explaining that his frequent use of words such as “my lord” and “your servant” suggest that not only is he speaking to Yosef, but more so he’s figuratively speaking directly to Hashem, pouring out his heart and his entire life’s narrative. Yehuda steps forward as an act of teshuvah standing up for his youngest brother and moving towards reconciliation for his past. With Yehuda taking a step forward, Yosef is moved to take the next step. Reconciliation involves a willingness to confront the pain of the past, to let go of resentment, and to rebuild con-
nections that were once severed.
As Yosef and his brothers embrace and weep together, the Torah teaches us that reconciliation requires vulnerability and a willingness to confront pain that led to the cutoff in the first place. The art of reconciliation is a testament to the strength of the human spirit, capable of turning wounds into wisdom and discord into harmony.
Here are three tips for reconciliation:
Step Forward with Vulnerability
Like Yehuda approaching Yosef, reconciliation begins with the courage to step forward, even when the outcome is uncertain. Open your heart, acknowledge the pain, and express your desire to repair the relationship. Vulnerability can create space for understanding and healing.
Listen with Compassion
Genuine reconciliation requires deep, compassionate listening. Allow the other person to share their perspective without interruption or judgment. This act of empathy helps rebuild trust and shows a willingness to honor their feelings.
Commit to Ongoing Effort
Reconciliation is not a one-time act but a journey. Commit to nurturing the renewed connection by addressing unresolved issues, fostering open communication, and demonstrating accountability. Small, consistent steps can lead to lasting harmony.
In our own lives, the lessons from Parshat Vayigash remind us of the importance of addressing emotional cutoffs within our families and communities. The path to reconciliation is a challenging journey worth taking. By acknowledging the pain, fostering understanding, and extending forgiveness, we have the potential to mend the broken bonds that hinder our well-being. May we find inspiration to embark on our own journeys of reconciliation, bridging the gaps that keep us apart and foster connections that bring healing and wholeness to our lives.
Elan Javanfard, M.A., L.M.F.T. is a Consulting Psychotherapist focused on behavioral health redesign, a Professor of Psychology at Pepperdine University, & a lecturer related to Mindfulness, Evidence-Based Practices, and Suicide Prevention. Elan is the author of Psycho-Spiritual Insights: Exploring Parasha & Psychology, a weekly blog. He lives in the Los Angeles Pico Robertson community with his wife and three children and can be reached at Elan.Javanfard@gmail.com.
Introducing
A Contest of Wit, Wisdom, and a Dash of Meshugas WHAT IS SCHTICKANAGINS, YOU ASK?
It’s the ultimate Jewish wordplay contest, where humor and creativity collide in a glorious mix of cleverness, culture, and just a bissel chutzpah.
Each week, we’ll post a new word-play challenge designed to stretch your Yiddishe kop.
Maybe we’ll ask you to rewrite a classic Jewish proverb with a humorous twist. Maybe you’ll need to invent a new stringency for Pesach or come up with a list of hilarious names for shul positions that don’t exist yet, but should.
No matter the challenge, your job is to outwit, outrun, and out-joke the competition.
Once you’ve cooked up your masterpiece, you’ll send it in to shtick@lajewishhome.com (but, we’re calling you Putz’s—because if you’re entering this contest, you’re one of us!).
Your entries will then be judged by our illustrious panel of experts:
The Kiddush Club Captain is known for his sharp tongue and sharp wit.
THE RULES
Each week, one winner will be crowned The Chosen One, earning the ultimate bragging rights and a feature in the next issue
A second-place nisher, lovingly called The Almost Chosen, will get a close-but-no-matzah nod of honor
A handful of runners-ups, the Shlishi Squad, will get props for their valiant e orts
And, of course, the Mensch-ionables—those honorable mentions who gave us all a good laugh—will receive a well-deserved shout-out
But wait, there’s more!
Beyond just mention, there will also be prizes for the winners.
These prizes might range from gift cards to local kosher restaurants, to Jewish-themed tchotchkes, to, well…random objects that people want to get rid of. You never know if you’ll win a gelt-scented candle or a slightly used challah cover, but hey, it’s all in good fun—and it’s all free!
So no complaining aloud.
Think you’ve got what it takes to outpun the Kiddush Club Captain, out-joke the Candyman, and outwit the Rebbetzin of Repartee?
Then step up, putz—it’s your time to shine!
So sharpen your wits, channel your inner shtickmeister, and get ready to join the fun.
Whether you’re an old pro at word-play or just love the sound of your own cleverness, Shtickanigans is here to help you kvell and compete!
Who knows?
You might even end up The Chosen One.
AND NOW FOR YOUR FIRST CHALLENGE:
“Kosher cruise down Pico to the beach: includes pre-wrapped tuna sandwiches and a sel e with a seagull.”
“Yeshiva Week in your in-laws’ basement in Scottsdale: Two meals a day, unlimited criticism, and an intense game of ‘ nd the a koman they hid last!”
“All-you-can-eat herring on a scenic bus trip to Samona. BYO grape juice.”
PRIZES
THE GRAND PRIZE FOR THIS WEEK’S CHALLENGE: a $100 gift certi cate to Pizza Station (because Pizza is a local landmark).
THE ALMOST CHOSEN will receive an unopened box of chocolate gelt from Munchies that mysteriously didn’t make it to the Chanukah party.
The Candyman, the sweetest jokester in the biz.
The Rebbetzin of Repartee, who knows how to turn a phrase better than anyone on her side of the bimah.
Send your submissions to shtick@lajewishhome.com by Tuesday, January 9.
Include your name, the Jewish neighborhood you live in, and your address (so we know where to send your prize if you win.
Everyone’s gearing up for Yeshiva Week, but not everyone can swing a luxury getaway to Florida or Cancun. So, we want your best ideas for budget-friendly local Jewish vacation packages for Yeshiva Week.
What would a totally unrealistic yet hilariously creative local staycation vacation look like for under $500?
Bonus points if you include a ridiculous destination, kosher menu, or activity package!
So, for example, if the awesome Saul Blinko were to enter, he would write:
Saul Blinko
Pico Robertson 123 Street Rd LA, CA 90035
Rules: You can submit up to seven entries. The winners—along with The Chosen One, The Almost Chosen, the Shlishis Squad, and all the Mensch-ionables—will be announced in our next issue on January 16.
EACH MEMBER OF THE SHLISHIS SQUAD will receive a Chabad menorah a Shliach couldn’t give away on Hanukkah—perfect for taking with you on next year's Chanukah vacation.
AND ALL THE MENSCH-IONABLES will be rewarded with an autographed photo of the Kiddush Club Captain (whether you want it or not).
May the best putz win!
Your’s truly, The Kiddush Club Captain
Yeshivat Yavneh ECD
Enjoys Special Relatives Day
The halls were filled with family, smiles, hugs, and cuddles, as our ECD special relatives joined our yeladim to prepare for the exciting chag of Chanukah! The classrooms were filled with Chanukah art, each adorned with sparkling shades of gold, silver, and blue. Each class experienced family time in their own way, enjoying special activities to engage in, as our smiling yeladim connected with their special relatives. The toddlers frosted Chanukah-shaped cookies and created stunning frames, while our Nursery students created layers upon layers of unique collage canvases, each filled with photographs and stunning gems. The oldest ECD students, our Pre-K yeladim, made beaded spatulas and painted wooden hot plates, in preparation for cooking latkes on Chanukah. Each student enjoyed singing, dancing, spinning dreidels, reading stories, arts and crafts,
delicious fruit, sprinkled donuts, cookie-baking, and loads of Chanukah ruach in their respective classrooms. It was truly a magical day of warmth and connection for our ECD yeladim!
Money Talks: Bridging Financial Gaps in Marriage
Awife asks her husband: “I need to buy a new dress.” “What’s wrong with the one you already have?” he asks. “it’s too long and the veil keeps getting into my eyes.” Do some, many, most or all couples argue over money? To understand that, let’s observe Joseph, a moment before he reveals himself in שגיו His advisers keep saying “Joseph, these people are innocent. All they want is food.” While Joseph is thinking to himself: “Innocent? They are mean! Food? They almost fed me to the snakes and scorpions.”1 Looking at the same picture they saw opposing realities: Joseph saw tormentors, the advisers innocent people. Both you and your wife look at money and you see opposing realities. It could be because you have different dreams, or even if you have a
shared dream, how you relate to money may be different. You for example want to create a budget, but to her a budget appears to be a way to control her spending, indeed to control her. Dreams are unspoken. If you speak them out with your wife, you will reduce your differences and increase your shalom bayit.
Rav Malkiel Kotler Gives Pre-Chanukah Shiur at LINK Kollel
Rav Malkiel Kotler, Rosh Yeshiva of Beis Medrash Govoha in Lakewood, NJ, delivered an inspiring shiur at LINK Kollel in Los Angeles on Monday, December 23rd, just before Chanukah. Despite the short notice, many Bnei Torah joined the Avreichim to hear words of Torah and chizuk from one of America’s leading Gedolim. Rav Malkiel was in Los Angeles as part of his efforts to support the Adirei HaTorah project.
The shiur began with an exploration of the Ramban in Parshas Beha’aloscha, linking Aharon HaKohen’s lighting of the Menorah in the Mishkan with the rededication of the Menorah by the Chashmonaim during Chanukah. Rav Malkiel emphasized the importance of creating a “Shalheves,” a vibrant flame, in our spiritual pursuits.
Rav Malkiel cited his grandfather, Rav Aharon Kotler, ZT”L, who explained that the miracle of the Menorah symbolizes the triumph of Torah and the soul over external adversaries. This victory stems from our dedication to Limud Ha-
Torah, which strengthens us against forces of assimilation and persecution. Rav Malkiel stressed that the miraculous power of Torah study comes from “Yegias HaTorah”—toiling in-depth to uncover its truth. This commitment to rigorous learning ignites the pure flame of Torah, ensuring Jewish survival and growth in exile.
As Chanukah celebrates the power of light, Rav Malkiel encouraged increased Torah study during the festival, particularly Torah B’iyun, to fuel a lasting spiritual vibrancy for our communities.
Mother Daughter Paint Night
Emek was pleased to host a Mother-Daughter Pre-Chanukah Art Night for girls in pre-1st through 8th grade. The over 300 participants made their way to the 3rd floor auditorium for a lovely pizza and salad dinner, where the ladies, both younger and older had the opportunity to catch up with their contemporaries while enjoying their delicious meal. After that, all in attendance painted beautiful chanukiot with acrylic paint on flat canvases. To top off the night, the ladies were treated to an extraordinary dessert table adorned with gorgeous pink and yellow decor.
Shalom Bayit
Rabbi Nir and his wife Atrian give regular classes on Shalom Bayit. His popular 3 minute podcast is funny and draws Shalom Bayit ideas from the Torah portion
Spivak Chanukah Festigal and Truman Scholars Announcement
Spivak Hebrew Academy held its annual Chanukah event on Wednesday, December 18th. It was named the Chanukah Festigal after the Chanukah events that take place in Israel during this time. The event opened with the very exciting announcement of 2 of our 7th grade students, Gila Mazar and Michal Alfassi, who have been selected to participate in the Truman Scholars Program through the Tikvah Fund Organization. The students will participate in a 2-year learning program alongside students from across the country, led by international scholars. We are so proud of them! Kol Haka vod!
Our Truman Scholars students intro duced the performance by the school choir, led by Hodaya Singer. Students in the 7th and 8th grade held flameless candles in a darkened room to symbolize the lights of Chanukah. Then the Elementary grades sang additional Chanukah songs, including Maoz Tzur and Ner Li. Following the performance, families were welcomed to participate in various activities, including candle making, cookie decorating, Steimatzky Book Fair, Chanukiyah contest, Face painting, raffle table, with pizza and blue and white donuts! Chanukah is a time to celebrate that we as the Jewish people have faced darkness and adversity with strength in our Tefilot, in our faith, and in our unity as the Jewish people. Our Chanukah Festigal was a wonderful way to usher in the upcoming Chanukah holiday and bring our light into the world!
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Stories to Inspire
Do you know…? Parshas Vayeitzei
Do You Know...? Parshas Vayigash
when Yakov came to Har Hamoria?
wanted Yakov to go to sleep so He made
What happened when Yosef’s son Menashe stamped his foot?
1. The whole Mitzrayim felt an earthquake
2. He squished a bug
didn’t pay the electric bill switched to Daylight Losing Time sending him to Harhamoria, Alabama, time he realized it, it was very late
3. He lost a game of Simple Simon Says 4. Everyone saw that he was happy and he knew it
rocks that Yakov put around his
What did Yosef say to the brothers when they were alone?
1. I am Yosef!
2. Do you wanna play the brothers game?
into a fluffy pillow rock band
3. Why is it called a pair of pants when you only have one?
a donut eating contest into one stone
4. Don’t tell the Mitzriyim, but my goblet isn’t really magical
the Yarden river?
What did Yosef ask the brothers?
1. Am I my brother’s keeper?
2. Is my father still alive?
his staff until the winter when it froze, and he ferry across the chicken and the fox, then the chicken back, then ……..
3. Do you have an iPad 5 DSi WiiU 10,000?!
4. Does our niece Serach still have a herkinor?
How did Yosef prove to them that he was really Yosef?
the well when he saw Rochel?
1. He asked them if they want to hear his dream
2. He showed them that he had a bris
for water for his camels
3. He showed them his driver’s license
selfie put her in a box the heavy stone Yakov?
4. He knew what their favorite Shabbos cereal was (Fruity Pebbles)
How did Yosef explain why he had to be sold?
1. Because that’s how the story goes
2. So he could get to see the pyramids
and he wanted his mummy giving hugs
3. So he could feed everyone during the famine
4. If you add the 7 to 18 and carry the 9 and subtract 4 you have about 11
National Hug-a-Lavan Day checking for hidden money and gifts
What did Yosef tell the brothers to do?
1. Dress up in Esav’s clothing
any money or gifts?
2. Go bring Yakov to Mitzrayim
3. Trade their iPad 5 DSi WiiU 10,000 for a herkinor
all from him Spirit Airlines gashmiyus!
4. Say Tefilas Haderech on the way home
glove compartment was full of gloves room for gifts
What was the name of Lavan’s wife?
1. Adina
How did they tell Yakov that Yosef was alive?
2. Adidas
1. Serach played on her kinor, “Yosef is alive”
3. Lavanah
2. They sent him an email
4. Mrs. Stevens
3. They wrote him a poem
The Trip That Went Nowhere but Changed My Life
Told over by Rabbi Zecharia Wallerstein Ztl
How did Lavan trick Yakov?
4. Serach lost the notes for “Yosef is alive” so they just played him the parsha song from 613 Torah Avenue
1. He claimed his name was Besuel
What did Hashem say to Yakov?
T2. There were no Franks ‘n Blanks at the smorgasbord
1. Don’t be afraid to go down to Mitzrayim
3. He had a secret card in his sleeve
2. Don’t eat from the Eitz Hadaas
4. He gave him Leah instead of Rochel
3. What even is a herkinor?!
4. Take two of each animal and put them in a teiva
What did Lavan say about why he tricked Yakov?
What did Yosef say the brothers should tell Pharaoh?
his story took place some years ago during Chol Hamoed Pesach. As anyone with a large family knows, Pesach can be quite the hectic time. On the eve of the second days, my wife “asked” me to take the kids out. Sensing that her polite request could quickly escalate into an order, I sprang into action, rounded up the kids, and announced, “We’re going on an adventure!”
1. It’s not our minhag for the younger sister to marry first
1. Knock-knock jokes
2. I trick people for a living
2. That they are shepherds
3. I don’t hold of the Eruv
3. That they miss the baker, of blessed memory
4. Let my people go!
The kids piled into the van, and off we went. When they asked where we were headed, I confidently declared, “It’s a surprise!” After driving around the block a couple of times, they grew suspicious. One of them asked, “Abba, is it a surprise for you too?” I admitted, “Well, maybe a little. So where do you all want to go?”
4. Did you hear about the mommy goat who claimed she couldn’t give birth and she wasn’t kidding?
Who was the 70th member of the family to come to Mitzrayim?
How did Lavan trick Yakov again?
1. Yocheved
2. Miriam
1. He changed his promise of payment
3. Miriam Webster
4. Mr. Stevens
That question led to a lively debate. The older kids vetoed the zoo (“If we see it one more time, we’ll turn into monkeys!”), and the younger ones groaned at the mention of the aquarium. Finally, I set the terms: “Listen, my job is to keep you out of the house for three hours. If you can’t decide, I’m happy to just keep circling the block.”
2. He claimed he didn’t know what speckled or spotted sheep were
3. He said, “I thought you said, ‘dotted sleep’!”
What did the Mitzriyim have to do to get food from Yosef?
1. Cartwheels
4. When he changed the clocks, he sprang backward and fell forward
2. Have a bris
3. Tie a sheep to their beds
Suddenly, I had an idea. I started driving toward JFK Airport. As we neared, the kids perked up. “Are we flying somewhere?” they asked, full of excitement. “No,” I laughed, “but we are going to the airport.”
Why was Lavan upset that Yakov left secretly?
4. They had to say the magic word
1. Someone stole his idols
What did the Mitzriyim do for food when they ran out of money?
Their enthusiasm waned slightly, but with the alternative being a return home to help with the dishes, they reluctantly agreed. My grand plan? The AirTrain. It’s free, it offers great views, and it runs in a continuous loop—a perfect combination.
2. Someone stole his iPad 5 DSI WiiU 10,000
1. They became Yosef’s slaves
3. He wanted to give him shliach mitzvah gelt
2. They starved
4. He loved giving hugs!
3. They gave Yosef their slime collections
4. They ate their herkinors
When we arrived, one of my daughters hesitated. “Abba, don’t you think this is a little strange? Who just goes to the airport for fun?” I assured her, “We’ll fit right in. These days, people dress and act in all sorts of ways. No one will notice us.”
What did Yaakov tell Lavan to explain why he ran away?
1. I was afraid you wouldn’t let me leave
2. I was afraid you would hug me again
3. The sheep were giving me baaaad dreams
To my surprise, the AirTrain platform was packed—with fellow Chol Hamoed travelers! Families from Boro Park and Flatbush filled the space, snacking on macaroons and matzah. It was a uniquely Pesach scene, one only New York could provide.
4. First you take across the chicken and the fox, then you bring the chicken back, then ……..
The kids loved it. They waved at passengers on the passing trains, laughed, and marveled at the planes taking off and landing. About an hour into our ride, a pilot in full uniform boarded our car. He stood, suitcase in hand, looking bewildered at the
bustling group of Pesach vacationers.
After a moment, he approached me. “Are all these kids yours?” he asked. I smiled. “Not all of them. Some are home helping my wife. This is just part of the crew.”
As we chatted, he grew curious. “Which terminal are you heading to?”
“Well…” I hesitated. “We’re not going to any terminal. We’re just riding the train.”
“How long have you been doing this?”
“About an hour and a half,” I admitted.
“Why?” he finally asked.
I explained, “My kids don’t have TV or video games. It’s my responsibility to give them meaningful experiences. The airport is clean, orderly, and filled with hardworking people like you. It’s a good place for them to see the world in action.”
He fell silent, then shared something deeply personal. “I’ve been a pilot for years, flying all over the world. My schedule is three weeks in the air and one week at home, but it’s not much of a life. My wife left me years ago. My daughter barely keeps in touch. I spend my days flying everywhere, but I have no one waiting for me when I land.”
As he prepared to disembark, he paused and said something I’ll never forget:
“Rabbi, you’re going nowhere, but you’re going everywhere. I, on the other hand, know exactly where I’m going at all times, but I’m going nowhere.”
His words stayed with me long after he walked away. They were a reminder of what truly matters: family, purpose, and the journey we create together.
So whether you’re “going nowhere” or seemingly “going everywhere,” take a moment to reflect. True destinations aren’t marked on a map—they’re found in the people we cherish and the lives we build.
Daniel Agalar, founder of Stories to Inspire, is dedicated to sharing uplifting stories from renowned Rabbonim that touch hearts and transform lives. With over 7 million podcast downloads and an ever-growing collection of 5,350+ stories, the platform inspires a global audience through its website at storiestoinspire.org and hotline (718-400-7145). Join the daily WhatsApp broadcast by messaging 310-210-1205 or tune in on Apple and Spotify podcasts to experience timeless wisdom and positivity.
Daniel Agalar
