When Chinuch Needs Compassion: A Call for Kinder Camps Page 14
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Dear Reader,
Summer camps have always held a sacred spot in our Jewish story — a place where friendships are born around crackling campfires, where tefillos rise up through open skies, and where, for a few sweet months, kids taste independence under the watchful eyes of counselors and rebbeim. But as you’ll read in this issue, summer camp is more than just color war and cholent cook-offs. It’s a world unto itself — one that can uplift a child… or sometimes miss a soul in need of seeing. Our writers this month tackle both sides: the unforgettable growth that summer camps can offer, and the quiet responsibility we bear to ensure that every camper — the spirited ones, the shy ones, the homesick ones — feels safe, seen, and supported. From stories about resilience born under the stars, to honest reflections about the pressures kids sometimes face to “fit in” to rigid camp cultures, this issue
invites you to look deeper: How do we nurture not just the tzaddikim and leaders of tomorrow, but the vulnerable neshamot standing right in front of us today?
We hope these articles bring back memories, spark conversations, and maybe, just maybe, plant seeds for a summer that grows not just stronger Jews, but gentler ones, too.
Because as one piece so poignantly reminds us: It’s not enough to build warriors. We must also build rachmanim — compassionate souls, in Hashem’s image.
Wishing you a season of light, growth, and connection,
Warmly,
The LA Jewish Home Team
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Shabbat Torah Reading: Tazria-Metzora Light Candles at: 7:21 PM
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Shabbat Torah Reading: Acharei-Kedoshim Light Candles at: 7:26 PM
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Saturday, May 10, 2025 Iyar 12, 5785
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Shabbat Torah Reading: Tazria-Metzora Light Candles at: 7:44 PM Friday, May 2, 2025, Iyar 4, 5785
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Shabbat Torah Reading: Acharei-Kedoshim Light Candles at: 7:50 PM
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Shabbat Ends: 8:52 PM Saturday, May 10, 2025 Iyar 12, 5785
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Shabbat Torah Reading: Tazria-Metzora Light Candles at: 6:54 PM Friday, May 2, 2025, Iyar 4, 5785
Shabbat Ends: 7:53 PM Saturday, May 3, 2025, Iyar 5, 5785
Shabbat Torah Reading: Acharei-Kedoshim Light Candles at: 7:00 PM Friday, May 9, 2025 Iyar 11, 5785
Shabbat Ends: 7:59 PM Saturday, May 10, 2025 Iyar 12, 5785
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When Chinuch Needs Compassion: A Call for Kinder Camps
Baily Rogatsky
Every summer, thousands of Orthodox Jewish children board buses to religious sleepaway camps, their duffel bags packed with sunscreen, siddurim, and high expectations. These camps promise growth, inspiration, and the kind of character development you can’t teach in a classroom. They offer lifelong friendships, growth in Yiddishkeit, unforgettable summers under Hashem’s wide, open sky.
And often, they deliver.
But not always.
For every camper who thrives in these highly structured environments, there are others who return home quietly defeated. Some limp home emotionally bruised, their souls a little heavier, their sense of safety a little less intact. More resilient? Maybe, but also more confused, more shut down. Sometimes they are hurt.
We don’t talk about these kids the way we should. We judge them for being different, but we don’t stop to ask why. We call them lazy, dramatic, distant, but do we ever wonder what it took for them just to show up that morning? We look past them when they fall behind, but we don’t reach out a hand when they stumble. We’re so busy running the program that we forget the Neshamos it was supposed to serve.
And sometimes, by the time we notice, it’s too late.
A Summer to Remember—for Better or Worse
Religious summer camps operate on an ideal: that through structure, spirituality, and shared experience, children will emerge stronger in their Jewish identity and better prepared to face life. But the reality on the ground can be more complicated, especially in gender-segregated, highly disciplined environments where deviation from the norm is not just frowned upon, it’s penalized.
For girls, that might look like modesty rules that leave no room for flexibility, spiritual expectations that feel performative, or emotional vulnerability that’s labeled inappropriate. One camper I spoke to shared that she and a friend, both homesick and desperate for comfort, would sleep in the same bed at night. They were pulled into
the director’s office and accused of being inappropriate, simply for leaning on each other to survive the loneliness.
In some camps, crying too often, missing home, or asking too many questions can get you labeled as a problem. In others, cliques dominate bunk culture, and not fitting in can mean spending three weeks just trying not to be noticed.
The boys’ side isn’t easier, it’s just different. There’s often a physicality to the social hierarchy. A culture of toughness. You’re expected to be strong, fast, athletic, energetic. One boy I spoke with described hiding in the woods behind his bunk every day during free time, just to avoid the other boys who tormented him for not being good at sports. “I was scared of being found,” he said. “But I was more scared of staying visible.”
In that same camp, he was once made to scrub bathroom floors as a punishment for talking during bentching. “They didn’t explain what I did wrong. They just handed me gloves and told me to get to work.” Whether or not the punishment was deserved, the memory stayed with him not as a lesson, but as a wound.
This is not a witch hunt. It’s a plea.
A plea to remember that camp isn’t just about building strong Jews. It’s about protecting fragile ones.
When Strength Is Not Enough
There’s a reason so many alumni, even those who struggled, still encourage their children to attend these camps. There is real, irreplaceable good here.
Camps teach independence. Responsibility. How to live with others. How to daven from your own place in your heart without your parents nudging you along. These experiences can make boys into men, girls into leaders, Jews into Jews who own their Yiddishkeit.
But we need to stop pretending that toughness is the only goal.
Torah doesn’t ask for warriors. It asks for Ovdei Hashem. For Rachmanim Bnei Rachmanim—people who lead with compassion.
Toughness without compassion isn’t strength. It’s cruel.
Resilience without understanding isn’t chinuch. It’s survival.
When survival becomes the bar, we’re no longer building soldiers in Hashem’s army. We’re creating soldiers without armor, and some won’t survive the war.
What’s Missing: Compassion, Space, and Support
No one is suggesting religious camps abandon their values or become free-foralls. The structure, the learning, the ruach, the deep friendships formed under the stars, these are sacred parts of Jewish summer.
But it’s time to admit that these camps are not working for every child. And that’s not because the kids are flawed.
It’s because the system is too rigid to hold their humanity.
What would it look like if camps made space for emotional safety, not just spiritual structure?
What if homesickness wasn’t something to hide but something to help with?
What if counselors were trained not just in leading activities and enforcing lights-out, but in noticing which kids were slowly disappearing into themselves?
What if there were someone on staff, a social worker, a mentor, a “camp rebbe” or “big sister”—whose sole job was to advocate for the quiet kids? The anxious ones. The non-athletes. The weird, creative ones who don’t quite know where to sit at lunch.
What if spiritual growth could coexist with softness?
Summer camps must remember that the neshama is delicate, even when the body looks tough.
They must remember that not every child who smiles at the lineup is thriving. That not every child who acts out needs discipline; some need saving.
Yes, camps should be places of discipline, of growth, of Ruchnius. But they must also be places of safety. Places where a child’s soul is guarded as fiercely as his schedule.
Places where Hashem would walk among the bunks and nod with pride, not
Why This Matters —And Who It’s For
There’s a certain reverence around camp culture in the Orthodox world. It’s where many of us felt our first sparks of connection to Hashem, to community, to ourselves. To question that culture can feel like betrayal.
But asking for improvement is not betrayal, it’s loyalty. It’s care. It’s the belief that camp can be even better, even more transformative, if we broaden our definition of who it’s supposed to serve.
Because the camper who thrives under pressure might someday become a camp counselor.
But the camper who hides in the woods? If we don’t catch him in time, he might stop showing up altogether.
We owe our children more than structure.
We owe them the space to be real.
We owe them grown-ups who don’t just enforce the rules, but see the kid behind them. We owe them vigilance not just against broken rules, but broken trust.
Because when a boy has to hide in the woods to feel safe, or when a girl is shamed for needing a hand to hold, it’s not just bad chinuch.
It’s a Chilul Hashem.
We can and must do better.
Our camps are meant to be gardens. Let’s make sure we aren’t teaching our children that the only way to survive them is to grow thorns.
After all, isn’t that what chinuch is really about?
Not just surviving, but thriving. In Hashem’s light, and in the safety of a community that sees the entirety of who they are.
We owe it to our children, not just the easy ones, not just the enthusiastic ones— to create summer experiences that hold them fully. That challenges them, yes. That stretches them, absolutely. But that also leaves room for fear, confusion, and the messy parts of being a kid.
After all, isn’t that what summer is for?
One Candle , One Spark
n the heart of Tel Aviv, where the relentless hum of ambition fills the air, David navigated his way through the crowded train station. His mind was cluttered with deadlines and project updates from his high-pressure tech job. The city--with its endless skyscrapers and flashing screens--often felt like a circuit board. Efficient, but cold.
On this particular Thursday morning, the winter sun rose between the buildings, casting long shadows across the station floor. David hurried through his commute. The station was a stark contrast to the polished corporate avenues he was headed toward. Here, the architecture was older. The signs are a bit dimmer despite the morning light.
As he turned toward his platform, David's eyes caught a peculiar sight: a small table set up near a pillar, manned by two women with warm, inviting smiles. Curiosity piqued, David approached the table, which was piled high with packages.
"What's all this?" David asked, his tone a mix of curiosity and directness honed by years in corporate meetings.
"Shabbos candles," the younger of the two women replied, her voice rich with a calm assurance. "Would you like to take a package? Shabbat starts tomorrow evening, you know."
David hesitated. Shabbat. The word echoed in his mind, stirring memories of his grandma's home, where she lit candles every Friday night, her face bathed in their gentle glow. He hadn't thought about those rituals in years, not since he'd moved to the city and replaced the sporadic Shabbat dinners with late nights at the office.
"Why not," David finally said, more to himself than to them. He picked up a package, the simple act feeling strangely significant.
The older woman smiled and handed him a small package containing two candles, a note with the candle lighting time, and a summary of the Shabbat portion. "Take it home with you. Light them tomorrow before sunset," she advised gently. As David accepted it, something within him stirred. A warmth, a flicker of something vaguely familiar yet long suppressed.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" the younger woman said, watching him with eyes that seemed to know far more than they should. "Sometimes, we need a little light to remind us of the beauty that exists in the world."
David nodded, unsure of what to say. For a moment, the station's chaos receded. There was something profoundly peaceful about standing there, package in hand, the simple act of accepting it reconnecting
him to a part of himself he didn't even know existed.
Something in his heart stirred again. He was sure he felt a tiny ache inside, a squeeze.
"Thank you," David murmured as he carefully placed the package in his briefcase.
"You're welcome," they replied in unison, gentle smiles on their lips. "Shabbat Shalom."
David walked away toward his platform, the weight of the package in his briefcase somehow noticeable despite its lightness. He didn't know what to make of the emotions swirling inside him. It wasn't a dramatic revelation or a sudden desire to change his life. Instead, it was a subtle dawn, a reminder of something he didn't think he'd ever forgotten, of a heritage that had quietly waited in the background while he built his career.
That evening, back in his sleek, modern apartment, David took out the package and placed it by his window. He looked at it, imagining how its light would mingle with the city lights when lit tomorrow. It wouldn't solve his problems or alleviate the pressures of his job. But the thought of lighting it brought a moment of tranquility, a connection to a tradition that felt both ancient and incredibly personal.
As he prepared for bed, David felt a quiet resolve to perhaps explore this part of himself a bit more. Perhaps. He felt a door creak open to a path he had never really considered walking down before. In the heart of Tel Aviv, amid the noise and haste, something rekindled a spark in David, reminding him that even in the most unlikely places, there are pieces of ourselves waiting to be rediscovered.
AND WHY WAS THERE A TINY TEAR SLIDING DOWN HIS FACE, FORMING A DROPLET ON THE SILK OF HIS TIE AS HE CAREFULLY HUNG IT UP FOR THE NEXT DAY?
Likras distributes thousands of candles every Erev Shabbos throughout Israel, rekindling sparks. Reminding Jews from all walks of life, that beneath all the layers, their pintele yid shines bright.
Little tables strewn across the breadth of Israel laden with the weight of rekindling a heritage in souls. Holy women, who volunteer of their precious time every Erev Shabbos, hand out beautiful candle packets that include two candles, the candle lighting times, the brachos for lighting, and a short Torah portion summary for that week's parashah to all passersby. Every candle packet that exchanges hands brings another beacon of light into the world. And while candle packages may not seem so significant, their impact says otherwise:
The dad who commits to keeping his laptop off on Shabbos.
The mom who promises to light candles of her own.
The family who sits down to a meal together, something they hadn't done in years.
The college student who refuses to attend Friday night parties.
The band member who won't play at the Saturday concert.
Want to help Likras spread the light? Every dollar goes toward the purchase of these packages... and igniting souls.
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Farbreng with The Kosher Gang: The Taste of Treif
We ate foods that you would NOT believe were kosher.
We’re both Baal Teshuvas, so we’ve tried it all when it comes to food.
“From Jack in the Box to Panda Express, from Taco Bell to The Cheesecake Factory… Our secular diets still hold a place in our memories. Since our palates grew up on popular non-kosher cuisines, our current kosher food reviews may serve as a ‘real-world’ reference point in the Jewish community.
This week we checked out some kosher restaurants elevating foods we once thought would be forever forbidden.
Before we get into that though, Levi, what’s up, man? How was your Passover? Did you eat any good K4P?
“You could say I had a VIP Passover. In fact, I performed as an entertainer at the youth’s VIP Passover program run by Alyssa Schechter. I had no idea how lavish life outside of Egypt would be! I mean, technically, the Jewish people are still in exile as many of us are not in Israel, the Holy Land. Yet, coming off a much-needed break with lots of wine and steak, I feel as free as Manna falling from the sky! I had the privilege of enjoying a mouth-watering variety of omelets and gluten-free pancakes, dairy lunches with smoked salmon and salads, stacked meats beyond my comprehension, and bittersweet Maror-Charoset sandwiches!”
“David, how you feelin’ bout the no-bread, no-problem Pesach experience you just had?”
Every meal I had over the chag was next-level! I had a boneless rack of lamb on the second seder night that was basically the filet mignon of lamb. It was perhaps one of the best things I’ve ever eaten. If a perfect score is not possible, we’re talking 99.5-level stuff on that one. Chametz or not, B”H it seems like we ate like kings this Passover!
By David Greenberg and Levi Paris
“I’m still leaning in my chair from all this kingship! How about yourself, King David?!”
I’m no king, but the Moshiach Seudah made me feel supercharged and ready for our final redemption, May It Be Today! הזב
Meanwhile… We’re finally back on the chametz train in both reviews this week! We visited hometown hero Lenny’s Casita and revisited the first restaurant we ever reviewed, Bowls N Bunz, to see if we were too harsh on our first trip.
Lenny’s Crunchwrap Supreme is a gourmet spin on Taco Bell’s classic dish. Bowls N Bunz is cranking out Chinese food that tastes nostalgically similar to the restaurants next to our high schools growing up. Except both of these spots are certified by the OK.
“Peeeewwwwww—BOOM! That was my brain when I tried Lenny’s Crunchwrap Supreme. I can’t believe it’s NOT Taco Bell. I remember calling Bowls N Bunz and saying, ‘Do you have Bowls N Bunz?’ And they said ‘yes’ lol. It’s the little things in life that matter most. Not just the pennies, but every single mitzvah. Speaking of mitzvahs, Bowls N Bunz is doing mitzvahs by keeping Jews happy with full stomachs and great savings.”
Bang for Your Buck?
Bowls N Bunz Brings the Boom
Bowls N Bunz, located at 6118 W Pico Blvd., is the site of our first-ever food review. At the time, I gave it a 75/100 based solely on their Chicken Teriyaki, which admittedly left a lot to be desired. One comment on TikTok said, “75 is generous for this place.” Still, others in the community insisted we should go back and try more items on the restaurant’s extensive menu. Ranging from Korean BBQ to kabob, with Chinese and Japanese cuisines in between, Bowls N Bunz has a lot to offer.
I’ve actually started popping in every once in a while since then, and Bowls N Bunz continues to perplex me. However, recently Bowls N Bunz has implemented some new deals on their pricing, making it an even more attractive offering by far.
“I’m talking two for one. I’m talking two burgers for $7.50 each. I’m talking two delicious, semi-unhealthy Chinese chicken trays with rice on the side for $17. With inflation going up, I can definitely appreciate the value Bowls N Bunz is providing on Uber Eats.
The burger was good. Just good, but at $15 for 2, good is great! Having just recently crowned Sandwichim by Nagila as the best kosher burger in town, we know how absolutely incredible it can get. That’s why I feel confident in saying this was an average burger compared to what’s available to us these days. Not the best but certainly not the worst either.
The problem is that’s exactly how I described the Chicken Teriyaki two months ago. This time around, we also got the Peking Chicken plate. Once again a buy-one, get-one deal. For the price ($33), it’s some of the best Chinese-style cuisine in town.
It brings me back to the little hole-in-the-wall spots on Jamaica Avenue I would pop into back in high school, way before I kept kosher. While elevated, the flavor and preparation keep this authentic, and to me, that’s the biggest compliment.
“Bowls N Bunz provides great value with discounts, but how do its dishes stack up?
I’ve only tried three of their dishes so far and my first impression has been swayed immensely. The first dish I tried was simple chicken and steamed veggies with no sauce and white rice. I was hopeful that my healthy order would hit the spot, but, alas, it did not. I walked away from Bowls N Bunz jaded, yet full. The next time I went to Bowls N Bunz with David, we each got a burger and a Peking Chicken with rice. To my surp-rice, the first bite of chicken sent me down memory lane to the Chinese restaurant I frequented regularly as a hungry high schooler looking for lunch.”
“I thoroughly enjoyed the Peking Chicken, which blew my mind since my last chicken experience with Bowls N Bunz, what-the-flock?! Let’s not dwell on the past though. Despite looking like it was ‘allegedly’ drenched in tasty Red 40 sauce, the Peking Chicken reminded me of Panda Express. In fact, if someone fed me their Peking Chicken blindfolded I would have assumed it was Panda Express! The chicken gets an 8/10 for me, I was seriously impressed.”
Wow! 8 out of 10? I’m actually shocked right now. Levi literally told me on the drive over here he was holding at a 4 out of 10 based on our previous experience.
“That being said, the burger came with no sauces. I’m such a sauce guy that I may or may not have secret villain plans to rule the world with my latest SAUCY-LASER 4000 Rayon… I was insulted that my burger didn’t even have a BBQ or spicy mayo sauce. On the flip side, the veggies were crisp and fresh as a breeze. So, it seems all hope is not lost. I made an executive decision to abandon half the bun when I ate the burger, an audible that nobody expected, yet it was received. I turned the burger into a burger taco because YOLO. I give the Bowls N Bunz burger a praiseworthy 6.9.”
“My first Bowls N Bunz experience was indeed hovering around a 4/10, but my second trip definitely elevated my perception of them. I’ll tip my hat where it’s due.”
“Drum roll, please………… On the Levi’s scale, I give Bowls N Bunz a fair 7/10.”
Wow. That’s actually pretty solid coming from you. I actually think our thinking is on a similar track this week.
For me, it’s tough because this food is good, but that’s what it is — good. In doing these reviews we’ve already had really, really good. Great! Even a cut above foods. So I still felt like my previous 75 out of 100 was a fair score.
However, considering the price — which is something we usually don’t factor into consideration simply because everything is expensive lol — this time, the food is so cheap that it’s worth considering. For that reason, I’m bumping up the score a few points to a 78 out of 100!
Slight redemption for Bowls N Bunz and a confirmation that I will continue to eat here regularly because, as a local neighborhood dinner spot — it does its job exceptionally well.
Bowl’
s n Bunz:
@LeviParisMusic Hot Take: 7/10
@WeWantMoschiachNow Overall Score: 78 out of 100
David Greenberg is a music industry professional, songwriter, and content creator. You can follow him @WeWantMoschiachNow on TikTok, IG, and YouTube. Hear his kosher pop music at soundcloud.com/WeWantMoschiachNow. For all inquiries: WeWantMoschiachNow@thelajewishhome.com
Lenny’s Casita is my favorite kosher restaurant in America. Lots of people I know would say the same thing. It really is that good.
“Woah, hold your horses, David. That’s a bold claim. I can’t believe you’re picking an LA restaurant over a NY kosher restaurant as your favorite. But you have a good point considering that Lenny’s might be the most famous kosher restaurant in Los Angeles.”
Everything on their menu is top-notch! I’ve never had a bad meal from Lenny’s and, as everyone-who-knows knows: the Crunchwrap Supreme is the most elite thing you can get there.
We both got the pulled beef brisket with the chipotle mayo, jalapeño mayo, and salsa roja for a spicy kick! Lenny’s never disappoints.
The crunchy, juicy Crunchwrap Supreme, consisting of two hard taco shells wrapped in a flour tortilla, is a flavor explosion.
From the first to the last bite, I inhaled this meal with the biggest of smiles on my face. I have not had a single better kosher food item in the entire country.
New York doesn’t even have kosher Mexican even close to this level, and this can go toe-to-toe with anything they do have.
“No kosher Mexican food in New York? Yeah, right. Don’t sleep on Mexi-Ko and Carlos & Gabby’s, both OU certified in NYC.”
“Not to throw salt in the wound, but, for me, the ambiance is really important. Wall Street Grill beats Lenny’s views all day long!”
“The Crunchwrap is really good though, and Lenny’s nightlife scene is pretty popping.”
I’m here to eat, bro! LA has the best views, period. Thanks to Lenny’s Casita, we also probably have the best kosher food in America. I can drive to any mountaintop I want and eat one of the best kosher meals around!
“As someone who grew up eating lots of Taco Bell, I can say with authority that this is the ‘best of the best’ Crunchwrap out there! Considering that Lenny’s uses real ingredients, this dish qualifies as not only gourmet but highly addictive and satisfying.”
I agree, this is street food elevated to its pinnacle. By far the best kosher food LA has to offer.
With that said, for me it’s simple. It’s too easy to give Lenny’s Casita my highest score yet, and it’s so well deserved.
I’m giving Lenny’s a 97 out of 100!
“Wow! David, even for you, that’s high. I can see why Jews in LA are going Casita-crazy, and Lenny’s brings a lot to the table. It’s some of the best we’ve had, maybe not the absolute best, but it’s up there for sure.”
No way!! Are we about to get a super-high Levi score? This is the only time I feel like it should have been obvious.
“I’m giving Lenny’s Casita a 9.3 out of 10 on the Levi’s Kosher Food Scale.”
Wow!! That’s super-duper high coming from Levi! If we both are so close on the scoring, then you know that Lenny’s Casita must really be the most fire of kosher foods!
This is an absolute must-try. Like, if you’re reading this any day that isn’t Shabbos, get on your phone and order Lenny’s Casita right now! I promise you that this is not an ad.
Lenny’s Casita:
@LeviParisMusic Hot Take: 9.3/10
@WeWantMoschiachNow Overall Score: 97 out of 100
What a week! Two great restaurants, two fun reviews, and so much delicious food! Whether you’re looking to score a good meal for a steal or treat yourself to one of the best meals around — we highly recommend adding both Bowls N Bunz and Lenny’s Casita into your dining routines. Until next time, I think that’s a review!
Levi Paris is a music artist, marketing strategist, and content creator. Follow him on all platforms @LeviParisMusic. Search “Levi Paris” on Spotify to listen to his music. For all inquiries: ParisMedia@TheLaJewishHome.com
During the summer, is there any leniencies in tznius (modest dress conduct and behavior) than during the rest of the year? Are there any halachic leniencies on tznius when a camp is anyways just an all-girls camp or an allboys camp?
Tznius All Year-Round
Tznius is a defining Jewish way of life for men and women. The Pele Yoetz writes that conducting in tznius is a defining factor that separates a person from an animal.1 A breach in the laws of tznius also violates (Vaykira 18:3) “… and you shall not follow their statutes” and (Vayikra 20:23) “ You shall not follow the practice of the nation…”
1 Pele Yoetz (Tznius). Although see Eruvin 100b "If He had not given the Torah, we would have learned modesty from the cat"
Ask the Rabbi
Tznius in the Summer
There are some Biblically required tznius laws that girls and woman need to keep, this is called by our Sages as ‘da’as Moshe’. Da’as Yehudis’ (the laws of the Jewish girls) includes various Rabbinical tznius requirements that Jewish women accept upon themselves.2 Men and boys must also keep a tznius dress.3
There are no leniencies for substandard adherence to tznius laws, particularly when it comes to going outside in public. Thus, even if the majority of the ‘community’ is acting unrightfully ‘lenient’ due to the heat of the summer, it is still forbidden by halacha to follow suit.4
Swimming and Beaches
It is forbidden for one to attend a non-tznius mixed beach, similarly, mixed gender pools are forbidden according to halacha.5
2 See Kesubos 72a and Shulchan Aruch Even Haezer 115:4.
3 See Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chayim section 2 & 3).
4 See Mishna Berurah 75:2
5 See Rav Ovadia Yosef's work, Yechave Da'at (5:63) based upon Berachos 61a – a man may who passes an area where a woman is washing clothes in the river does not have a portion in the world to come. See also Avoda Zara 20b, Bava Basra 57b and Eiruvin 18b which reprimands a man who looks at woman when they are not tznius.
However, Igros Moshe (Even Haezer 1:56) differs with Yechave Da'at (ibid) and writes that specifically for health reasons if there is no other tznius part of the beach a man could go there if he is certain that he will not have improper thoughts. If one is not sure he could avoid improper thoughts, it would assumably not be allowed.
Yechave Da'at counters that the proof
With regard to younger children, as to what age may there be mixed swimming, one should consult with a Rav.6
Separate gender swimming should also be done with relatively tznius swim clothes, as tznius dress applies even when one is not in front of the opposite gender. Shulchan Aruch Admur Hazaken writes7: “ Even when he is alone at night, in his private chambers, he should conduct himself modestly and bashfully in the presence of the Holy One, blessed be He, for “the entire world is filled with His glory”; in His sight, “darkness is as light…”
May girls go to a water park or mixed beach if they are dressed in a tznius swimsuit, even though it is open to the general public?
No. Besides that, it is inappropriate as this is a form of pritzus (non tznius behavior), women also need of Igros Moshe (that when there is no other path one may pass a place where a woman is cleaning laundry in the river) that it is not applicable to going by choice to a non tznius beach which is certainly more non-tznius than a river where they would wash clothes. So even for health purposes there is no allowance to go to a mixed beach. See also Aseh Le'cha Rav 3:42 about if there could be a potential leniency for going to the Dead Sea for pure health reasons.
6 Boys over nine years old may not swim with girls of age three and up. Some poskim also do not allow even boys of over five years old to swim with girls over three. However, some are extra stringent of non-mixed swimming from even younger ages. One should consult with one's Rav.
7 See Tur and Shulchan Aruch 2:1. Shulchan Aruch Admur Hazaken (Orach Chayim Mahadura Basra 2:1).
to be careful at looking at nontznius dressed men.8
Summer Tznius Takeaway
There are no halachic allowances to be ‘less careful’ in tznius during the summer over the rest of the year. The Lubavitcher Rebbe would emphasize how the evil inclination tries to justify a nontznius dress, with the claim that it is only a ‘temporary thing. As some would claim, “I shall sin and return” (be overly lax in tznius during the summer, and when I return to the city or school, I will do teshuva and observe tznius laws properly).
In fact, when the evil Bilam ultimately blessed the Jewish people, he noted that the tents of Yakov are even tznius. As it states (Bamidbar 24:5) “ How goodly are your tents, O Jacob, and your dwelling places, O Israel!”
The tents allude to even the temporary transit of the Jewish people. Even when the Jewish people are in a temporary setting, they still protect the holiness of tznius.9
and
8 Even though that men have a greater concern of protecting their eyes, nonetheless there still is also a prohibition for woman as well.
See Chinuch (mitzvah 387): "This mitzvah [of not to stray after their heart and their eyes] is applicable in all places and in all times by males and females."
See also Kuntres Pokeach Ivrim from the Mittler Rebbe; Teshuras Shai (1:125); Mishna Halachos (5:222).
9 See Likutei Sichos (vol. 13 pg. 84).
books on mezuzah and sefer torah. He has Yoreh Yoreh and Yadin Yadin from Central Tomchei Tmimim Brooklyn NY. He is also an ordained sofer and
assists on Jewish status matters. For questions or dedications you can reach him at jewishchesedumishpat@gmail.com or 310 617 5205
Dovid Nissan Bressman
Rabbi Dovid Nissan Bressman authored two halacha
magiah
the director of Chesed Umishpat which
Celebrating 25 Years
A Tribute to Those Who Make JLIC Possible
To our extraordinary campus directors – the heart of JLIC:
In these challenging times, you've been more than mentors; you've been family to orthodox Jewish students across North America and Israel. Your unwavering dedication has created homes away from home on 35 campuses, touching the lives of 8,000+ students annually.
We extend our deepest gratitude to you for teaching Torah, developing student leaders, running meaningful programs, and opening your homes.
For 25 years, campus directors have been the foundation of our success. Together with our community of supporters, we continue this vital mission of nurturing orthodox Jewish life on campus for generations to come.
Thank you.
Lou’s Views The Solution To The Russia-Ukraine War
It has been more than two years since Russia launched its full-scale invasion of Ukraine, and there is still no end in sight. Despite various diplomatic efforts, Ukraine refuses to surrender territory, and Russia refuses to loosen its grip.
Secretary of State Marco Rubio summed up the challenge well: “The only solution for the war in Ukraine is a negotiation where both Russia and Ukraine give up something. There is no military solution to this war. The only solution to this war is a negotiated settlement where both sides are going to have to give up something they claim to want, and are going to have to give the other side something they wish they didn’t. That’s how you end wars, and that’s what we’re trying to achieve here so more people won’t die.”
Similarly, Kyiv Mayor Vitali Klitschko recently told the BBC that Ukraine might have to give up some territory to achieve peace, though he stressed that Ukrainians would “never accept occupation” by Russia. He called any territorial concessions “temporary” at best.
To understand how the conflict reached this point, one must look back decades. Ukraine’s struggle for independence from Russian influence is rooted in history. Ukraine was part of the Soviet Union for 69 years, from 1922 until 1991. The Soviet Union, officially known as the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics (USSR), was a massive communist state dominated by Russia. Built on communism, it controlled nearly all aspects of life and was a global superpower during the Cold War. However, harsh dictatorship, censorship, and economic failure eventually led to its collapse in 1991, when Ukraine and other republics declared independence.
After independence, Ukraine faced economic collapse, corruption, and political instability. In 1994, Ukraine surrendered its nuclear weapons through the Budapest Memorandum, receiving assurances from Russia, the United States, and the United Kingdom that its borders would be respected. In 2004, Ukraine’s Orange Revolution brought a pro-European government to power. A decade later, after pro-European protests ousted a pro-Russian president, Russia responded by invading and annexing Crimea in 2014 and supporting conflict in eastern Ukraine. Since then, Ukraine has moved closer to Europe and worked to defend its sovereignty against Russian aggression.
President Vladimir Putin’s interest in Ukraine is fueled by historical, strategic, economic, and political motivations. He views Ukraine’s independence as a historical error and sees Ukrainians and Russians as “one people.”
Strategically, Ukraine serves as a vital buffer between Russia and NATO. Economically, Ukraine’s fertile land, natural resources, and industrial base are valuable assets. Politically, a successful, democratic Ukraine threatens Putin’s authoritarian model by offering Russians a nearby example of a freer society. For Putin, regaining control over Ukraine is key to restoring Russia’s global power.
Negotiating with Putin is difficult because he operates emotionally, not logically. His ideology will not be changed through threats or isolation. Thus, realistically, the war will only end when Putin is removed from power.
The United States will not send troops to achieve this because of lessons learned from the Vietnam War. In Vietnam, the U.S. became trapped in a bloody conflict against a determined local population, leading to massive casualties, domestic unrest, and no clear victory. Ukraine presents a similar risk: fighting directly against Russia — a nuclear superpower — could spiral into global nuclear war. That is why the U.S. strategy has been to support Ukraine with weapons and aid, weakening Russia without direct military confrontation.
This situation differs from World War II, when the Nazis sought global domination and racial extermination, prompting U.S. military intervention. Putin’s goals, while aggressive, focus on restoring regional influence, not global conquest.
Ultimately, Putin can be defeated either by internal uprising — protests, elites turning against him, or even a coup — or simply by being outlived. Sanctions and continued military support to Ukraine can pressure Russia’s economy and military until change comes from within.
As frustrating as the war is, President Trump must not abandon Ukraine. Doing so would weaken American credibility, encourage more global aggression, reward Putin’s violence, and betray the principles of democracy and freedom — all while surrendering a strategic opportunity to weaken a major adversary without risking American lives. Supporting Ukraine is not just about one war; it is about defending the international order that has helped maintain global stability for decades.
Lou Shapiro is a criminal defense attorney-certified specialist and legal analyst, but most importantly, makes the end-of-shul announcements at Adas Torah. He can be reached at LouisJShapiro@gmail. com.
It’s Never Older Until Hashem Says It Is
One day in 1945 in Dachau, Judah Wallis z”l was walking when suddenly a Jew being taken to his death flung a small bag of tefillin at him. Being caught with tefillin was punishable by death, so he hid the tefillin under his shirt and headed for his barracks. In the morning, before roll call, he couldn’t resist the opportunity to lay tefillin, yet suddenly, a German officer appeared from nowhere. He then dragged him outside, waved the tefillin in the air and said, “Dog! I sentence you to death by public hanging for wearing these.” With the noose around his neck, the officer said in a mocking tone, “Dog, what is your last wish?” “To wear my tefillin one last time,” Judah replied. “The officer was dumbfounded yet still handed Judah the tefillin and as Judah put them on, he recited the brachas aloud. The entire camp, including the neighboring female camp, was forced to watch the impending hanging of the Jew who had dared to break the rule of wearing tefillin. As Judah turned to watch the silent crowd, he saw tears in many people’s eyes. In Yiddish he called out, “Yidden, I am the victor. Don’t you understand? I am the winner!”
Because German and Yiddish are similar, the German officer understood what he said and was livid. “You dog, you think you are the winner? He grabbed Judah who was then forced into a squatting position and two huge rocks were placed under his arms. Then he was told that he would be receiving ten lashes to his head – the head where he placed his tefillin. The officer told him that if he dropped even one of the rocks, he would be shot immediately. In fact, because this was such an extremely painful form of death, the officer advised him, “Drop the rocks now. You will never survive the 10 lashes to the head. Nobody ever does. Judah’s response: “No, I won’t give you the pleasure.” At the 10th lash, Judah lost consciousness and was left for dead. Later,a Jew shoved him to the side, and covered him and eventually hid and nursed him for two months until he was ultimately liberated.
During the beating episode, a seventeen year-old girl witnessed the events and was clearly moved by this man’s unyielding kiddush Hashem. After the liberation, she eventually found Judah and said, “I’ve lost everyone. I saw what you did that day when the officer wanted to hang you. Will you marry me?” They requested that the holy Klausenberger Rebbe perform the marriage ceremony. He wrote the ketubah [marriage contract] by hand from memory and married the couple. The ketubah still hangs in their children’s home to this very day.
Aside from the obvious lesson of how far a Jew can climb, in order to keep a mitzvah, it also reminds us how many people neglect such important mitzvahs, treating them lightly. Can you imagine that this man who had every reason to be angry at God, took the opposite approach and risked his very life taking a beating, just for the opportunity to put on tefillin. How can so many Jewish people simply neglect the most basic commandments when their ancestors gave their lives for those commandments over the centuries. And our holy Creator isn’t asking us to take a beating in order to prove our allegiance to Him. Thank God we live in America where we do not have to endure such horrible torture for observing Torah and mitzvahs. Judah Wallis had every excuse to absolve himself of many mitzvot but his Ahavas Hashem overpowered that, catapulting him to the level of a true Tzadik. Let us double our efforts in this unbelievable time of religious freedom that God has granted the world, where we can observe Mitzvot b’simcha, allowing us to fulfill our ultimate raison d’etre, a oneness with Hashem.
Avi Ciment attended the Hebrew Academy of Greater Miami, spent a year attending Shaarei Yerushalayim and received his bachelor’s degree in Psychology as well as an associate degree in Judaic Studies from Yeshiva University. He lectures throughout the world, has been a regular contributor to The Jewish Press for over 20 years, and is now featured on AISH, The Jewish Link and more...
Avi Ciment
LET’$ Grow WIth Lorenzo
A Matter of Identity: On Concealing Your Jewishness in Business
The question of whether one should ever hide their Jewishness to gain business advantage has all the markings of a profoundly misguided inquiry, like asking whether it’s wise to amputate a healthy limb to save on shoe leather.
Yet in hard economic times, this dilemma surfaces with uncomfortable regularity. So let me be direct:
Concealing your identity to chase commercial success is not merely a moral compromise – it’s a spectacular strategic blunder.
As any marketer will tell you, businesses that scramble to be more palatable to the mythical “average customer” invariably produce average results. They become indistinguishable from their competitors, adrift in a sea of calculated blandness where nobody remembers your name, much less your services.
Your identity – including your Jewishness – isn’t some extraneous feature to be hidden away like an embarrassing relative at a wedding.
It’s a foundational element of who you are and, by extension, what your business represents.
Any client who would reject you for being Jewish is precisely the kind of client who will prove troublesome in countless other ways. They’ll haggle over invoices, question your expertise, and generally comport themselves with the special entitlement reserved for those who believe the world should conform exactly to their preferences. So by concealing your identity, you’re not expanding your business; you’re simply postponing inevitable conflicts while sacrificing your dignity in the bargain.
There’s a peculiar breed of self-deception at work when we imagine that success hinges on becoming less ourselves. We engage in elaborate mental gymnastics, telling ourselves we’re being “practical” or “strategic” when we’re actually surrendering to
fear – fear of rejection, fear of limitation, fear of standing apart. This fear masquerades as business acumen, but it’s merely cowardice wearing a necktie.
Those who suggest hiding your Jewishness typically invoke practicality.
“It’s just business,” they’ll say with practiced nonchalance, as if commerce exists in some ethically neutral dimension where identity becomes optional. But business is never “just business.” It’s a human endeavor conducted by actual people with actual values. The notion that you should check our identities at the door when we enter the marketplace is both impossible and undesirable. They also claim that when times are tough, you need to do anything that you can to survive. But the most successful businesses are not those that dilute themselves to avoid offense, but those that stand confidently in their distinctiveness. Hard economic times don’t call for abandoning who you are; they demand that you become even more authentically yourself. Your Jewishness brings with it a perspective, a history, a set of values that can infuse your work with depth and character. Why squander such an advantage in pursuit of phantom clients who require your self-erasure as a prerequisite for their business?
The path to sustainable success isn’t paved with compromise and concealment. It’s ha ha ha ha built on the bedrock of genuine identity, honestly expressed.
So when someone suggests you might benefit from not being so Jewish, respond as you would to someone advising you to swim with concrete shoes. Politely decline and find a better minyon.
Yoel’s Lemonade Stand
The Safety Of Risk Taking: Chutzpah in the Age of AI
The advertising industry has always been preoccupied with appearing business like without necessarily being so.
We Jews have a fancy word for it: Chutzpah. It sits somewhere between outright crazy and absolute genius – that comfortable but loud middle ground where most advertising has pitched its tent since the first snake oil salesman cleared his throat.
But thanks to AI, chutzpah has turned from evil to necessary. Because in an age where machines can now craft marketing campaigns that sound chutpahdik faster than a roomful of junior copywriters on their third pot of coffee, the question becomes not “Does this sound risky?” but rather “How can anyone tell the difference anymore?”
I’ve always believed that advertising bestows no prestige except, paradoxically, on those who have nothing to do with its creation. It remains the least respected of arts, and perhaps for good reason. And now we’ve handed over the keys to algorithms that can mimic our mediocrity with frightening precision.
At the end of the day the real fact of the matter is, as the iconoclast ad man Howard Gossage once put it, “nobody reads ads. People read what interests them, and sometimes it’s an ad.” And when you see the type of advertising and marketing that mediocre minds with artificial intelligence can create, it becomes abundantly clear that the world is soon going to filled to the brim with advertising and marketing nobody is going to read.
People are developing an immunity to intrusive advertising, just as surely as they develop immunity to other irritations. AI-generated content that lacks authentic human perspective simply accelerates this immunity.
When I entered advertising (rather late in life, I might add), I operated on the principle that one should get paid for actually making ads for clients and products one liked (not for regurgitating formulas or, now, for prompting a machine to do so).
That’s why I still believe that the best advertising always comes from creative dictatorships, usually from one person with what I might call a “theatrical ego.”
Can AI have ego? Can it have taste? Can it decide what’s worth saying and what isn’t? I think not. To borrow another analogy from Howard Gossage, marketing without real human chutzpah is like shooting fish in a barrel, except the fish are getting smarter, are less inclined to hold still and are developing armor.
The duty of advertising is to both the person who pays for the ad and the person who will see it. But if I had to choose, I would unquestionably choose the person who will see it first. After all, it’s their attention, their time, their X feed you are interrupting. You are there at their pleasure. This is not a dogood attitude, but a wholly realistic one.
So in this age of artificial creation, perhaps our greatest responsibility is to remember that risk taking isn’t merely about sounding risky. But rather, like most human emotions, it’s about genuine human connection. And that Chutzpah without humanity isn’t just another intrusion demanding permission to speak that it hasn’t earned. It’s just bad marketing.
The riskiest thing you can do in marketing is playing it safe.
Justin Oberman is the Marketing Director and Marketing Editor of the LA Jewish Home and is the Co-Founder of a personal branding ad agency called Genius Scouts. He can be contacted at justin@geniusscouts.com
Justin Oberman
Lorenzo Nourafchan
In Parshat Tazria, we learn about the concept of ‘Tzaraat,’ often mistranslated as leprosy. However, Tzaraat is not merely a physical affliction, but a visible manifestation of a spiritual malady. Although Tzaraat was an affliction of the skin and the person afflicted would be isolated, unlike leprosy, the isolation of the Metzora (one who had Tzaraat) had nothing to do with contagion. This spiritual affliction portrayed by a physical condition provides us an opportunity to explore the psychological concept of somatization.
Somatization refers to the tendency for psychological distress or emotional issues to manifest as physical symptoms. These symptoms often have no apparent medical explanation
Spiritual Somatization Parshat Tazria
Tzaraat was actually a supernatural affliction that would usually come about due to a number of sins, most notably the sin of speaking lashon hara, evil speech. The concept of somatization aligns with the understanding that the person must not look at the physical aliment but rather the underlying reason the condition manifested, in this case, a spiritual one.
When examining Tzaraat through the lens of somatization, we understand that the gossip and slander described in the Torah aren’t just damaging on a social level; they also harm the individual internally. Hashem causes the negativity and toxicity harbored within to manifest physically, serving as a powerful reminder of the interconnectedness of mind, body, and spirit. In Mishneh Torah, Hilchot Tumat Tzaraat 16:10 the Rambam explains that the entire purpose of the affliction is to provide the person an opportunity to repent, leading to purification, which is the purpose of the progression of the visible Tzaraat. It starts on the walls of the house, then clothing, then skin – moving closer and closer to the hu
chological practices where healing begins with acknowledging and addressing the root causes of distress. By confronting the negative behaviors and emotions that led to Tzaraat, the person can begin to purify themselves from these behaviors. In the seminal book on somatic work, The Body Keeps the Score, its quoted “As long as you keep secrets and suppress information, you are fundamentally at war with yourself…The critical issue is allowing yourself to know what you know. That takes an enormous amount of courage.” Sometimes a spiritual sign is needed to help us on our path towards awareness.
Here are three tips to reduce the impact of Somatization from physical and spiritual issues:
• Practice mindfulness: by focusing on harmonizing our body, mind, and spirit we allow ourselves to better be in tune to any tension we hold.
• Express yourself: by pouring out how we feel to Hashem in prayer and friends we allow our emotions to permeate our awareness.
• Being growth oriented: by constantly searching for signs to grow we allow ourselves to not wait for issues to arise but rather consistently work on bettering ourselves.
Author Peter A. Levine said, “Our capacity to heal is greater than our capacity to be wounded.” Parshat Tazria serves as a poignant reminder of the connections between mind, body, and spirit and the profound impact our thoughts and actions can have on our physical health. Bnei Yisrael learned that our spiritual connection to each other and Hashem grow by noticing our failures and resolving them. May we all learn to notice the signs around us and within us to create a higher level of spiritual and emotional satisfaction.
Elan Javanfard, M.A., L.M.F.T. is a Consulting Psychotherapist focused on behavioral health redesign, a Professor of Psychology at Pepperdine University, & a lecturer related to Mindfulness, Evidence-Based Practices, and Suicide Prevention. Elan is the author of Psycho-Spiritual Insights: Exploring Parasha & Psychology, a weekly blog. He lives in the Los Angeles Pico Robertson community with his wife and three children and can be reached at Elan.Javanfard@gmail.com.
In His Hands
Shira Shirim
My mother-in-law was turning ninety, and Gigi, my husband’s brother, suggested we fly out and throw her a birthday party. Of course, there was no question about observing this significant event and combining it with a family reunion. And with Gigi and Didi, his wife, living nearby in a huge house, there was no question where we’d stay, right? Wrong!
“Well, I can tell you you’re not staying in our house,” Gigi informed us, and he suggested we stay in Lilian’s, my mother-in-law’s building. “They rent out furnished units; we could even have the party there,” he added, seeing Lilian’s unit was slightly bigger than a linen closet.
It sounded like a plan, so my husband, Pinky, made calls, sent texts, fired off emails, and reserved a unit in his mom’s building.
What do you get for someone’s ninetieth birthday? Lilian was an All-State field hockey goalie in high school, and Pinky tried ordering a field hockey jersey adorned with the number “90” for her present, but the company’s minimum order was twenty, so that didn’t work out.
“What should we get her instead?”
“I don’t know; she has everything she needs.” I wasn’t being cruel; it’s only that Lilian had recently sold her two-bedroom townhome and gotten rid of a ton of stuff before moving into her studio.
We purchased two tickets, packed—no gift—and Ubered to the airport.
“Maybe we should pick up something in the terminal gift shop.” Suggested Pinky.
“Are you kidding me? The markup in those places is ridiculous. We’ll get something there. Besides, I have enough on my mind right now.”
Gigi made me nervous because we bought our tickets without verifying the pilots’ experience or the plane’s age. I didn’t know that was a thing. So, during the flight, to take my mind off this peril, I read lots of Tehillim and looked out the window, imagining the continent was a giant piece of matzo with sprigs of romaine lettuce, and the pilot was guiding us to freedom—the promised land—and we’d land safely.
The treiffic [Pinky’s term for traffic] on the “I” was horrendous. Thank G-d Gigi picked us up because if Pinky had been driving, he’d have turned the car eastward and driven back home.
Lilian’s building was luxurious, but our unit was…well, let’s just say it left much to be desired. There were no blinds, and the sun poured through the windows like arrows raining down upon us. For five maddening days, we were forced to sit on the floor, with our backs resting against the bed, the mattress being the only shield between us and sec-
ond-degree burns. The kitchenette was the size of our Honda’s glove compartment, and Gigi demanded that we stand in there to eat.
“We won’t fit in there. Why can’t we eat in the dining area?”
“They just had the rug shampooed. If you stain it, you’ll have to clean and pay for it.”
We looked at the carpeting, covered with more stains than a leopard had spots, and silently agreed to take our chances and eat at the dining table.
On Friday, we drove by dazzling vistas to a kosher winery and met a second cousin for the first time. We enjoyed spending time with Lilian, meeting her lovely friends, and walking around the picturesque hilly grounds.
With Licht bentchen bearing down upon us, there was no time to buy a gift. We had to catch an Uber to the rabbi’s house, where we were staying for Shabbat. Gigi’s family isn’t orthodox, but they stored a frosted glass menorah in their freezer— that’s something, yes? No?
Sunday, the day of the party, arrived. The phone rang before I had my first cup of coffee—not a good sign. It was Didi. “The guys will take out their mom while we girls decorate the apartment and set it up for the party. Doesn’t that sound nifty?”
Nifty? Let me be clear. I’ll do hard; I’ll do messy. I’ll even hold as ‘calls are being answered in the order they are received,’ but I don’t do “nifty.”
“I was hoping we could do more sightseeing with you guys.”
“Ha,” she chortled. “Whose going to set up the party?”
We were eight people, including Pinky and me, and the room was the size of a walk-in closet; how hard would it be to decorate? Maybe Didi planned on laying plastic coverings on the carpet and furniture. Fortunately, she agreed to take care of the decorations but then dropped the bomb. “Leave your gift on the table so I can wrap it.” I didn’t reply. “You have a gift, don’t you?”
“Um, isn’t our presence giftly enough?.”
“You have to get a gift,” she said, flames tinging the edge of her voice. “Get her a nice bottle of perfume or a box of chocolates.”
I knew for a fact that Lilian hadn’t eaten chocolate since her retirement party in 1995, and I don’t recall her ever wearing perfume.
“How about I get a facial moisturizer from Whole Foods? There’s one across the
street. They have some wonderful moisturizers.”
“You are not buying facial moisturizer for Lili’s ninetieth birthday present.”
“Why not; it’s something she could use.” I put Pinky on the line.
“—We’re not buying mom chocolate because the nearest kosher candy store is in Chicago.”
Didi didn’t understand because Lilian didn’t keep kosher. So, it was agreed that Mimi, our niece, would pick us up and take us somewhere to buy a gift.
“How about I take you over to Yuckville? They have quaint shops there, you can see the bay, and you’ll find something nice for Grandma.”
“Great! Let’s go!”
In Yuckville, we meandered along decaying docks and crumbling walkways, listening to the Korean and Japanese tourists chirping and warbling like a flock of happy birds. People were enjoying themselves— we were on a mission from G-d.
On a sloping street, we found a tiny gift shop that sold cute coffee mugs delicately accented with gold, orange, and brown brushstrokes. These were obviously one-of-a-kind creations, probably produced by an owlish potterer way up in the hills near the beach.
Pinky wanted to buy two in case one broke, but at 25.00 each, I stopped him at one mug and suggested we get one of those tiny hand towels with a cute saying— something about family and dish drying going hand in hand.
Success! We got Didi’s nod of approval, handing her the mug and hand towel. She wrapped them and reviewed the last-minute details of the party before leaving, allowing us to shower and dress.
At 4 pm sharp, there was a dull knock at the door; Mom and her friends had arrived. Shortly thereafter, Mimi stepped in and gave us all a big hug. Gigi swaggered in with a couple of pizza boxes, and Didi followed, carrying more cups and napkins. “You can never have too many cups and napkins.”
We assembled around the dining table, careful not to spill anything. Lilian read the cards, alternately funny or sentimental. The gifts were stacked behind her on spartan shelving, and as she plucked the first present from the shelf, she said, “I hope it’s not a coffee mug; I have plenty of those.”
I can’t make this stuff up. If I had that imagination, I’d make millions writing for Larry David instead of stuffing insurance policies into envelopes for Pinky’s business. Pinky looked at me and lip-synched:
Put the gift away. Forget about it. We’ll send her something.
It was too late. Lilian was already reaching for the gift and unwrapping it. “Oh, what a lovely coffee mug!” She could’ve won an Academy Award. Then we ate cake, played rummy cube, relaxed, and enjoyed being with Mishpocha.
Two days later, we returned home. We exited the plane, our carryons in tow, and headed toward the exit. We passed a gift shop in the long corridor and stopped dead in our tracks. In the display window stood an arrangement of coffee mugs, and one of them was the identical mug we’d bought in California, which we believed to be one-of-a-kind. Unbelievable!
Against my wishes, Pinky entered the shop, picked up the mug, and looked at the price stuck on the bottom. It was ten dollars less than we’d paid. I watched his expression go through the four stages of grief in reverse, ending with denial.
“Forget about it, Pinky. We did what we were supposed to do, and that’s all that matters.”
“It isn’t the money, but rather why did Hashem put us through all of that…that—”
“—That drama?”
“Exactly! He could’ve shown us the coffee mug when we departed, inspired us to buy it, and finished!”
“Yes, but then we wouldn’t have had such a memorable visit. The real question is, what are you planning for my ninetieth birthday?”
“I was thinking of taking you to a fancy hotel with no blinds.”
“Oh, would you? Could you? Oh, sweetie, I’d love that. And lots of stains on the carpet.”
“Of course. And you can decorate the room and blow up all the balloons.”
“—With my ninety-year-old lungs— ha! And what about my present; what will you get me?”
“Oh, that’s in Hashem’s hands.”
We laughed. My oh my, Hashem has a strange sense of humor, but He knows what each of us needs and ensures we get it. Picking up our luggage, we rolled through the double doors and out the exit and have never looked back.
Shira Shirim lives in Arizona with her husband, her two golden retrievers, Fauna and Flora, and a cockatiel. She enjoys competitive dog grooming, soap carving, and creative writing in her spare time. This is her first attempt at publication. You can contact her at shirashirim408@gmail.com
Beyond the Headlines
A weekly glimpse into the Israel you won’t read about in the news
Sivan Rahav Meir
Translated by Yehoshua Siskin, Janine Muller Sherr
POST PESACH MUSINGS FOCUSING ON THE GIFTS WE RECEIVE ON PESACH
A not-so-young single woman sent me the following note after Pesach. Her powerful message can give strength to anyone, regardless of their situation:
“Shalom, Sivan. I had a pretty lousy holiday, but on the seventh day of Pesach I remembered an idea I once heard that on every holiday we receive a gift–we are replenished with faith and holiness. We receive this gift without even realizing it. If we participated in a Seder, drank four cups of wine, read the Haggadah and ate matzah, this gift is ours.
“While it’s true that the more we invested in the Seder, the more obvious the gift, even if we were anxious, sad, bitter, ashamed, and envious of our married sister sitting there surrounded by her children,
and the last thing we wanted was another holiday like this one God has still given us these gifts.
“We ate matzah? Boom! We received an injection of faith for the entire year. This dose of emunah is absorbed into our bodies and souls regardless of how we felt. Consciously or unconsciously, we have been transformed by this experience. By participating in these mitzvot, we have been granted renewed energy. From now through the rest of the year, as we face struggles and challenges, sadness and despair, we can draw strength from the gifts we received on Pesach. For just as God was with our ancestors in Egypt, He hears our cries and feels our pain, and in the end, our personal redemption will come too.”
THE FUTURE NA’AMA
After celebrating Pesach, the Season of our Freedom, here is an idea about freedom from Na’ama Levi, the IDF soldier who was abducted on October 7th and returned to Israel after 477 days of Hamas captivity:
“What gave me hope while being held captive was the thought that perhaps one day I would get out of there and return home to my family. When it was hard and I was at my wits’ end, I told myself that while today’s Na’ama is at her wits’ end, I had to think about the future Na’ama. I realized that if I refuse to
despair, the future Na’ama will return home so happy and will thank today’s Na’ama for her strength and resilience. I thought about my family and friends and everyone else who was waiting for me, and I knew I had to be strong for them too.”
For whatever challenge or distressing circumstances any of us might face, we learn from Na’ama to look beyond the here and now, to think of who we will be in the future, and to act in the present accordingly.
Did you hear about Dina Fahimi of Netivot? I am embarrassed to admit that I had never heard of her until Pesach night. On October 7, 2023, a missile from Gaza landed a direct hit on the home of the Fahimi family. Dina lost her husband Rafael, her son-in-law Netanel who was married to her daughter Tal, and her oldest grandchild Rafael, who was shortly to have celebrated his Bar Mitzvah. Members of three generations from the same family perished on the same day.
Dina, together with her widowed daughter and her orphaned children, came to Jerusalem to celebrate Pesach at a Seder with 30 other bereaved families. We were privileged to be with them and to see how heroic people emerge from the suffering that Egypt represents. Here is what I learned from Dina:
1. How can it be that everyone I ask has never hear what happened to the Fahimi family? Her story, like so many others, is incredibly shocking but also incredibly important. We must never lose sight of our true enemy and what it wants to do to every one of us every day — not only what it wanted to do to us on October 7.
2. We need to remind ourselves of October 7 not only because of evil, but because of good. Many are already familiar with Miriam Peretz and Iris Haim. Dina Fahimi is cut from the same cloth. Within the pain of a shattered heart, she exudes optimism and hope. How many heroes like those who were murdered on October 7
went up to heaven without our knowing them, and how many heroes like them live among us without our knowing them either?
3. Towards the end of the holiday, I asked each family if it would like to convey a message to the rest of us. Dina said she had nothing to add to the words of the Haggadah that were spoken that night since they cover everything. On Pesach night, the past connects to the present and the future: the matzah and the maror; “You will live by your blood”; “In every generation they try to destroy us”; “This is what has stood by our fathers and us”; and finally, “Next year in rebuilt Jerusalem” when the final redemption comes. Amen.
JEWISH IDENTITY ABOVE
Here is another story that eloquently demonstrates how Jews fulfill their freedom and stand up for their values. On Friday, the delegations from the Emet Network in Modiin and the “Lapid” Bnei Akiva Yeshiva in Modiin reached an advanced stage in the global robotics competition in Houston, Texas. The final stage of the competition was set for Shabbat.
The members of the delegation made the
following announcement: We’re happy to have made it to this stage, but we are proudly withdrawing from the competition because we observe Shabbat, and that is a supreme Jewish value for us. You are invited to learn more about Shabbat at our booth. We have left materials there explaining the significance of the holy day. Shabbat Shalom to all. This message is dedicated to
Sivan and Dina Fahimi
The Relationship Reset Crowning Her Twice: How to Truly Honor Your Wife
Yehudah Kamman
In the busyness of family life—children’s needs, work pressures, household schedules—it’s easy for sacred dynamics within marriage to go unnoticed. One of the most beautiful, and often misunderstood, aspects of a woman is her ability to embody two powerful roles: the nurturing Mother and the radiant Queen.
Each role is holy in its own right. As a mother, she is the protector—solving problems, watching the clock for naptime, making sure the lunches are packed, the boo-boos are kissed, and the household is functioning. Her attention is everywhere. She’s on alert, tactical, and full of love—but in that space, her energy is directed outward. Her focus is on giving, protecting, and managing.
But a woman is not only a mother. She is also a Queen. She needs space to receive, to rest, to be cherished, and to be seen—not for what she’s doing, but for who she is.
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The challenge for many couples is in the transition. How does a woman, after a full day of keeping everyone alive and well, simply shift gears into softness, trust, and receptivity? And how does a husband recognize when it’s time to help her step back from the Mother and remind her of her crown?
This is not about performance—it’s about awareness. Too often, we see tension arise in marriages not because there is a lack of love, but because the Queen has been forgotten amidst the noise. The husband still sees the tactical partner. The wife still holds onto the to-do list. No one pauses to honor the shift.
As men, we must lead this. We must learn to see when she needs help laying down her armor. Maybe that means making her tea before she asks. Watching the kids while she takes a bath. Looking into her
eyes—not with questions or demands—but with admiration. Whispering, “You don’t need to hold it all tonight. Let me hold you.”
And she, in turn, must remember her part: to allow the shift. To practice the art of letting go. It may not be perfect. It may take time. But when she allows herself to be poured into—to be adored without earning it—she steps into her feminine glory.
This sacred balance is deeply rooted in Torah. Just as we transition from the labor of the week into the holiness of Shabbos, a woman, too, must have space to transition from the doer to the receiver. Shabbos is our weekly reminder that we’re not just builders and problem solvers—we are beloved children of the King, meant to rest, reconnect, and rejoice.
So too, within marriage: we must create holy transitions. We must talk about them. Protect them. Lead them. And cher-
ish them.
When a woman is honored in both her roles—when her motherhood is respected, and her queendom is celebrated—she becomes free to be her true self. And the man who learns to honor both sides of his wife? He becomes a king in his own right.
Let us lead with that wisdom. Let us notice more, ask more, and give more. Because she deserves to be loved on both sides of who she is.
Yehudah Kamman is a relationship coach and founder of Men of Integrity, dedicated to transforming lives and relationships. He helps men move from feeling stuck and disconnected to embodying strength, confidence, and authentic connection. Yehudah has also helped countless couples rekindle the honeymoon phase, creating deeper passion and harmony. Through his work, he guides individuals and couples toward greater self-awareness, purpose, and fulfillment. If you’d like to learn more, follow Yehudah on Instagram @men_of_integrity_life E: yehudah@ menofintegrity.life
SINGLE FAMILY HOME FOR SALE IN MIAMI BEACH
This 2016 smart home by Todd Glaser and Domo Architecture features dramatic ceilings with an open layout, a creative L-shaped heated lap pool, and en-suite bedrooms that open onto an expansive balcony It offers an exceptional price per square foot and is ideally located near the beach and Sunset Harbour’s top restaurants and boutiques
SOLA Jewish Community Center Breaks Ground: The Eden Project
Exciting things are happening in the heart of Los Angeles. The SOLA Jewish Community Center is in the midst of a transformative building project that’s set to revitalize Jewish life on the West Side.
Located at the corner of La Cienega and Airdrome, the new SOLA JCC sits in a prime, accessible spot, strategically chosen to serve LA’s growing Jewish population. But this is more than just a construction site — it’s a bold investment in the Jewish future.
At the core of the project is a vision: to build a central gathering space where Jewish life can flourish. A major highlight is the expanded Jewish Montessori school, which will accommodate more students and offer enriched programming in both Jewish and secular education.
The center will also feature state-of-theart mikvahs — one for women and one for men — creating sacred, welcoming spaces for ritual immersion, renewal, and community connection.
Another cornerstone of the new facility is “The Shula Hall,” which will serve as the permanent home for the four existing minyanim
that already attract hundreds of participants each week. These minyanim have been crucial to building community, and now, with a dedicated space, their reach and impact will grow even further.
One of the most exciting aspects of this project is its potential to reshape residential patterns for Jewish families in LA. The center is situated in a more affordable neighborhood than nearby Beverlywood or Beverly Hills.
For observant families looking to live near a shul and mikvah, this opens new possibilities for community living at a lower cost. By establishing a vibrant, accessible Jewish hub in this area, SOLA hopes to encourage young families to move nearby, making Jewish life more sustainable and inclusive.
Construction is well underway, and the site already reflects the magnitude of what’s to come. Community members are
encouraged to visit and see the progress firsthand.
The SOLA Jewish Community Center is more than a building — it’s a vision of Jewish connection, learning, and growth for generations to come. Thank you to everyone who has helped bring this dream to life. Stay tuned for more updates — and if you’re nearby, stop by and see what the future looks like.
KKL-JNF Serves as a Vital Bridge Between the Past and Future
March of the Living Award presented to KKL-JNF Chairwoman Ifat Ovadia-Luski for her leadership and KKL-JNF’s contribution to national resilience and Holocaust remembrance.
The 37th March of the Living took place today (April 24) in Poland, marking Holocaust Remembrance Day 2025 with a symbolic march between the Auschwitz and Birkenau extermination camps. This year’s event also commemorated 80 years since the liberation of the camps and the end of World War II.
For the first time, the March of the Living Award was presented to individuals and organizations for their significant contributions to Holocaust remembrance and the strengthening of national resilience. Among the honorees was Ifat Ovadia-Luski, Chairwoman of Keren Kayemeth LeIsrael–Jewish National Fund (KKL-JNF), in recognition of her leadership and the organization’s ongoing commitment to preserving memory and building a secure future. She was honored alongside Iris and Haim Taib, Co-Chairs of the Menomadin Foundation, and representatives of Israel’s high-tech sector.
The official ceremony included the lighting of six memorial torches by Holocaust survivors, IDF soldiers, and families of hostages—both those still in captivity and those who have returned. One of the most moving moments was a tribute to the late Yosef Wiener, a Holocaust survivor from Kibbutz Kfar Aza, who lived through the October 7 attacks in which two of his grandchildren were murdered. He passed away in December at the age of 98.
President Isaac Herzog and First Lady Michal Herzog led the Israeli delegation, walking side by side with Polish President Andrzej Duda. Their presence emphasized the role of the Allied forces in liberating the camps, represented at the ceremony by Merrill Eisenhower Atwater, great-grandson of General Dwight D. Eisenhower.
Among the marchers were 40 Holocaust survivors, aged 80 to 97—some who had survived the camps, others who had been hidden, and some who were rescued by the Righteous Among the Nations. They were joined by survivors of the October 7th attacks, attending as part of a special delegation organized by the Menomadin Foundation. Also present were World Zionist Organization
Chairman Yaakov Hagoel and representatives of the Hostages and Missing Families Forum.
Each year, a delegation from KKL-JNF participates in the march. The organization sees deep significance in the connection between Holocaust remembrance and the ongoing struggle for the existence and security of the State of Israel.
Marching alongside Chairwoman Ovadia-Luski were Co-Chairman Yitzhak Vaknin, Deputy CEO and Legal Advisor Shimi Baron, Education and Community Division Director Sar Shalom-Gerbi, and Yuval Yenni, CFO, CDO, and Acting Head of the Resource Development and External Affairs Division— along with board members and senior staff.
The march concluded with a moving ceremony at Birkenau, featuring a performance by Daniel Weiss, a musician from Kibbutz Be’eri who lost both parents on October 7th. He performed alongside Agam Berger, a recently released hostage, who played a 130-year-old violin that survived the Holocaust.
Ifat Ovadia-Luski, Chairwoman of KKLJNF, said: “On our path from the shadows of the Holocaust to the light of national revival, Keren Kayemeth LeIsrael–Jewish National Fund serves as a vital bridge between the past and future. Here, in a place that bore witness to the greatest atrocities, stands a proud and sovereign nation.
For over 120 years, KKL-JNF has fulfilled the vision of building the Land of Israel and continues to stand as a symbol of life’s triumph over death, and of creation over destruction. With every tree we plant, every forest we cultivate, and every water source we develop, we fulfill our promise to the six million: not only to remember, but also to build and to flourish.
As we march today in the March of the Living, we carry with us the legacy of those who perished—and at the same time, we pledge to continue building a thriving, green country.
KKL-JNF stands at the forefront of the fight for a hopeful future in the State of Israel, just as it stood by the Jewish people in their darkest hours. The March of the Living is not only an act of remembrance—it is a commitment to a future where every blossoming patch of land stands as a living testimony to our victory.”
A Pair of Pants
Do you know…? Parshas Vayeitzei
when Yakov came to Har Hamoria?
Do You Know...? Tazria-Metzora
wanted Yakov to go to sleep so He made
What does a woman need to do after she has a baby?
1. Buy lots of diapers
2. Bring 2 korbanos
3. Call all her friends!
didn’t pay the electric bill switched to Daylight Losing Time sending him to Harhamoria, Alabama, time he realized it, it was very late
4. Try to decide who the baby looks like
rocks that Yakov put around his
Which animals should she bring as korbanos?
1. The ones who don’t behave
2. A turtle-dove and a sheep
3. A turtle and a dove
into a fluffy pillow a rock band a donut eating contest into one stone the Yarden river?
4. A dove and a really slow sheep
What happens to a baby boy on the 8th Day?
1. He joins a Chassidic rock band
2. He has a bris milah
3. He celebrates his one-week anniversary
4. People have the option to stop calling him “The Baby”
Who comes to every bris?
his staff until the winter when it froze, and he ferry across the chicken and the fox, then the chicken back, then ……..
1. Eliyahu Hanavi
2. Charlie Buttons
3. The caterer (hopefully)
4. The baby!
Who should go to a bris?
the well when he saw Rochel? for water for his camels selfie put her in a box the heavy stone Yakov?
1. Mendel Shmotkin from Hamilton Heights
2. The caterer from Kosher Delights
3. The photographer with a camera and lights
4. Anyone who the family invites
What happens to everyone because Eliyahu came?
1. They claim they saw him drink some wine
2. They are forgiven for their aveiros
and he wanted his mummy giving hugs
3. They star in Stories of Elijah the Prophet
4. They add a fifth cup
National Hug-a-Lavan Day checking for hidden money and gifts
Why would a person get Tzora’as?
1. If he speaks Loshon Horah
any money or gifts?
2. If he wants to look funny
3. If he sprays himself with Tzora’as spray
all from him Spirit Airlines into gashmiyus! glove compartment was full of gloves room for gifts
4. If he speaks badly about Poison Ivy
What was the name of Lavan’s wife?
1. Adina
If a person thinks he may have Tzora’as, who does he call?
1. A Kohen
Sholom Feldheim
O2. Adidas
3. Lavanah
2. A skin doctor
3. A skinny doctor
4. Mrs. Stevens
4. Dr. Pepper
How did Lavan trick Yakov?
What does the Kohen do if he thinks it is Tzora’as?
n Shabbat, I was reading the local Jewish newspaper and noted several ads for summer camp. Ah, summer camp; I remembered when I was twelve, my parents wanted to take a vacation, and they discovered it was cheaper for them to stay home and send me away to camp. I’ve never forgotten that metamorphic month in the mountains.
1. He claimed his name was Besuel
1. He runs away!
2. He tells the person that he is tamei
3. He takes pictures and Googles it
Camp Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob was for Reformed Jews. Everyone called it Camp “Av-IJa,” and thought it was an Indian name.
2. There were no Franks ‘n Blanks at the smorgasbord
4. He tries to make the person feel better by saying something hysterical like, “Hey! Your Tzora’as is shaped exactly like Australia!”
3. He had a secret card in his sleeve
“Av-I-Ja” had typical camp activities and special events, like Color War. One week, it was announced there would be a “Sadie Hawkins” dance.
4. He gave him Leah instead of Rochel
“Whose Sadie Hawkins?” I asked my friend, Marc.
the room at a dark-haired girl wearing eye shadow and a choker, dancing with a friend. “That’s her man. Isn’t she gorgeous? Go over and ask her to dance.”
“But I thought she was supposed to ask me?” I pleaded.
“She already did. Now you have to go over to her.”
My cabin mates pushed me towards Evelyn, and she made a beeline for the punch bowl. Now that we were closer, I noticed she wore jeans trimmed with silver studs on the pockets, and I thought she was a cowgirl.
Where must the person go if he has Tzora’as?
What did Lavan say about why he tricked Yakov?
“She’s not a person; it’s a dance, and the girls ask the guys out,” he clarified.
1. A Red-skins game
2. Outside of the Machaneh Yisroel
3. Skindinavia 4. Tzora’as Recovery Meetings
1. It’s not our minhag for the younger sister to marry first
2. I trick people for a living
What happens if the Kohen isn’t sure?
That night, we were to report to the rec hall, pass in front of a sheet of plywood with holes cut into it, give our name and age, and say something about ourselves while the girls on the other side passed judgment. I wasn’t sure if I liked this.
3. I don’t hold of the Eruv
1. He looks it up in the Big Book of Tzora’as Signs
2. He waits 7 days and checks again
4. Did you hear about the mommy goat who claimed she couldn’t give birth and she wasn’t kidding?
3. Ha says, “You may not have Tzora’as but you sure have tzuriss! Ha Ha!”
How did Lavan trick Yakov again?
4. He goes to a bris
My bunkmates spent a lot of time dressing and brushing their hair before the “plywood test.” I had lots of T-shirts, underwear, and socks, but no clean pants, as I wore the same pair every day. I brushed my hair, but that was the extent of my preparations.
1. He changed his promise of payment
What happens to clothing that has Tzora’as?
2. He claimed he didn’t know what speckled or spotted sheep were
1. It must go to the dry cleaners
2. It must be burned
Later that evening, we lined up at the rec hall. I passed by the hole in the plywood and said I liked sports and the Beatles. [It was 1970.] The next morning, the counselor passed me a slip of paper with a girl’s name, and I stuck it in my pocket.
3. He said, “I thought you said, ‘dotted sleep’!”
3. It needs to stop speaking Loshon Horah
“Who picked you?” asked Marc.
I slipped him the slip of paper, and he whistled, “Evelyn Ruderman!”
4. When he changed the clocks, he sprang backward and fell forward
“You know her?”
4. It must be washed with TurtleDove soap
“Sure! She’s the most popular girl in camp.”
Why was Lavan upset that Yakov left secretly?
What happens if your walls get Tzora’as?
1. “Bring the house down!” (To the tune of Avraham Fried’s “Bring the house down!”
1. Someone stole his idols
“What makes her so well-liked?”
“You’ll have to meet her to find out,” he answered cryptically.
2. Someone stole his iPad 5 DSI WiiU 10,000
3. He wanted to give him shliach mitzvah gelt
2. You must tear them down
3. You need to get new ones from Wallmart
4. He loved giving hugs!
4. You should stop talking to them
How does Marc know her? Shouldn’t he be busy playing softball and improving his archery score? Now I’m positive I don’t like this stuff.
What did Yaakov tell Lavan to explain why he ran away?
1. I was afraid you wouldn’t let me leave
2. I was afraid you would hug me again
At last, the night of the event arrived, but I only had my one pair of ratty-looking pants. Neal Glassman, the self-appointed Casanova of the cabin, suggested I wear a pair of his snazzy pants. They were too big, but if I kept one hand in the pocket while gripping the inside of the waistband, I could keep them up. Everyone but me thought this was a good idea.
3. The sheep were giving me baaaad dreams
Bubby Gordon – Miriam bas R’ Eliyahu ע”ה and Bubby Friedman – Miriam Tzimmel bas R’ Yosef Baruch ע”ה
4. First you take across the chicken and the fox, then you bring the chicken back, then ……..
Join the Torah Poems community at www.torahpoems.com and get a beautifully crafted Torah poem, thought-provoking questions, a humorous story, and a fun Shabbos meal trivia contest for kids—delivered straight to your inbox every week!
That night, the dining hall was magically transformed. The overhead fluorescents were extinguished, and the kitchen lights feathered into the dance area. It was like a nightclub with sticky floors and wicked cooking odors. “Sugar, Sugar” blasted from a record player as the campers lined up on either side of the room and furtively looked upon a scattering of dancers.
Neil approached me and pointed across
I wasn’t writing yet, but my overactive imagination was already in high gear. I pictured us riding horses beneath a glorious blue sky, grooming them in the cool of her barn and later telling our grandchildren how we’d met at a Jewish camp with an Indian name at a dance grandma asked me to, but I had to ask her to dance…
I don’t recall what happened next, but Evelyn suddenly stood before me, and I asked if she was a cowgirl. She glanced down at my hand, awkwardly turned inside my pocket, and scowled, “No, why do you think I’m a cowgirl?”
Her bunkmates laughed as I retreated to the other side of the room, where my friends were waiting for me.
“What happened?”
“She doesn’t like me.”
“What? She chose you.”
I didn’t reply, I was too busy trying to scoop up punch into a cup while holding up my pants.
“Can I ask her to dance?” asked Marc. “Sure. I don’t care.”
That was a long night as I watched each of my bunkmates dance with Evelyn while I drank more punch than a hippo.
Two weeks later, my parents came and picked me up. My mom unpacked my trunk and remarked that all my pants were nicely folded.
“—Wait a minute…did you even wear these?”
I was unaware that the top half of my trunk contained movable trays for my underwear, while my pants were stored in the bottom half.
Oy!
When Shabbat ended, I asked Kwisee, my wife, if she’d ever attended a Sadie Hawkins dance. “Yes,” she replied. “I remember it like it was yesterday. They let us wear pants, and I wore these jeans with studs on the pockets. They were considered very risque. You know, at that age, a pair of pants can make all the difference.”
I smiled and nodded in agreement. Sholom Feldheim lives in Florida, selling insurance to feed his family. His cute, comical pieces have been published in Mispacha Magazine and elsewhere. One of his stories aired on NPR’s Miami affiliate. He can be reached at legacywriter999@gmail. com
JFLA is Making Jewish Summer Camp Possible — Without the Financial Stress
The LA Jewish Home Staff
For many Jewish families, summer camp isn’t just a fun getaway—it’s a formative part of childhood. Camps like Ramah, Alonim, and Hess Kramer create lifelong friendships, strong Jewish identities, and memories that last well beyond August. But with rising tuition costs, many parents are finding it harder to keep this cherished tradition in the family budget.
That’s where the “Morris Doberne and Hannah Doberne Campership” loan through The Jewish Free Loan Association (JFLA) steps in.
For 120 years, JFLA has provided zero-interest, zero-fee loans to individuals and families in need—offering support with dignity, speed, and compassion. And now, as camp
season approaches, they’re doubling down on a mission to make Jewish summer experiences accessible to everyone.
A Loan That Feels
Like a Lifeline
From sleepover camp Moshava Alevy to Emek day camp, JFLA offers Jewish Summer Camp loans for up to $5,000, requiring no guarantors, no fees, and no interest. The loan must be repaid within 12 months, but families don’t have to jump through hoops or prove financial hardship. It’s quick, confidential, and respectful.
“These loans aren’t just about helping families afford camp,” says Rachel Grose, Executive Director of JFLA.
“They’re about making sure Jewish kids don’t miss out on a powerful, formative experience—just because of financial stress.”
Preserving Dignity, Providing Access
Unlike scholarship programs that can feel invasive or stigmatizing, JFLA’s loans are designed with dignity in mind. Everyone is treated with respect, and the process is designed to empower, not shame.
The loans are funded by donors who believe in one of Judaism’s oldest values: interest-free lending. It’s a modern take on communal responsibility, and it’s changing lives one quiet loan at a time.
More Than Just Camp
While summer camp is a current focus, JFLA also offers loans for everything from college tuition and car repairs to rent, small business expenses, and fertility treatments. If it matters to your life, it matters to them.
To learn more, visit www.JFLA.org or reach out to info@jfla.org.
Because no Jewish child should miss out on camp because of money—and no parent should have to face that decision alone.
Hillel Hebrew Academy Siyum Emek’s 5th Grade Girls’
As Am Yisrael recently completed Sefer Shemos, students at Hillel Hebrew Academy experienced an immersive Siyum of Sefer Shmot. Guided by their teachers, students stepped into the incredible moments leading up to Pesach: they witnessed baby Moshe rescued from the Nile, watched him grow into a caring shepherd, and heard Hashem’s voice assigning Moshe and Aharon the mission of freeing Bnei Yisrael by the burning bush. Students bravely faced Pharaoh, helped build pyramids in Mitzrayim, and saw the powerful Makos unfold right before their eyes. Finally, led by Moshe himself, they prepared for freedom, learned about the very first Seder night, baked their own matzah, and joyfully crossed through Kriyas Yam Suf!
This Siyum Sefer Shemos gave Hillel students a memorable way to conclude their learning, allowing them to live the lessons of Yetziyas Mitzrayim and experience firsthand the meaning and excitement of Pesach!
Emek’s 5th grade girls presented a meaningful Shomrei Halashon performance for their parents, displaying their comprehension of the Torah’s lessons on thoughtful speech and respectful behavior. Through engaging skits that portrayed real-life, everyday situations, they highlighted the importance of judging others favorably, as well as the devastating impact of gossip, which spreads like feathers in the wind, causing immense harm. Each student selected a pasuk from the Torah and beautifully decorated a poster to explain its connection to the laws of “Lashon Hara” - the prohibition against harmful speech. The program also featured two heartfelt songs, reinforcing the message of kindness and mindfulness of our words. We would like to sincerely thank Morah Maya for her incredible dedication and leadership in preparing the students for this event; her vision facilitated the girls’ ability to present these essential values in creative ways, making this
Stories to Inspire Hashem’s House Still Stands
Daniel Agalar
Rabbi Duvi Bensoussan shares the following personal story, one that left a lifelong impression on his heart and shaped his understanding of what it means to cherish a house of Hashem.
It happened one summer many years ago at Camp Kol Rina in the Catskills. Rabbi Paysach Krohn has told this story over the years—but I was there. I saw it. I lived it.
That summer, the camp’s head rabbi came up with a powerful initiative: a Kiddush Hashem competition. Each bunk was tasked with coming up with a creative way to sanctify G-d’s name in public. The prize? Two pies of pizza. But to us, it wasn’t about the pizza—it was about the pride. We all wanted to do something that would truly make Hashem proud.
One bunk visited a local nursing home. Dressed in Shabbat clothes, they danced and sang with the elderly residents, bringing tears and smiles to their faces. Another bunk headed to the ShopRite nearby, where each boy stood
at a checkout lane, bagging groceries with warmth and cheer, wishing each customer a good day. The locals, many unfamiliar with Jewish boys in yarmulkes and tzitzit, were moved by the kindness.
But our bunk had a different idea—one that would leave an impression I still carry to this day.
We remembered the old shul in Livingston Manor. Built in 1907, it had been closed for decades. What if we could reopen it? What if we could bring it back to life, even just for one day, and fill it again with prayer and stories? What kind of Kiddush Hashem would that be?
Our counselor found the man who held the key: Izzy Brooks, the unofficial caretaker. We called him, told him what we wanted to do—not for the prize, but for the honor of Hashem—and he was thrilled. “Of course,” he said. “That would be beautiful.”
We dressed in white shirts and arrived early. When Izzy opened the doors, we were
stunned. No dust. No cobwebs. The shul was pristine. Slowly, one by one, elderly men from the community arrived—some with walkers, some with tears in their eyes. They looked around the sanctuary as if traveling back in time.
Izzy put on his tallit and tefillin and led Shacharit with a trembling voice. After the prayers, the elders shared memories—about the founders, the golden days, the vibrant community that once filled the pews.
Then our camp rabbi turned to Izzy and asked, “If the shul’s been closed since 1955, how is it so clean? Even the calendar is up to date.”
Izzy looked down, then quietly answered, “Rabbi… every week since 1955, I’ve come here. I sweep the floors. I dust the seats. I straighten the Aron Kodesh. I update the calendar. No one prays here anymore—but it’s still Hashem’s home.”
That moment pierced my heart. That’s what the Jews of the previous generation understood. Their relationship with a Beit Knesset
wasn’t casual—it was sacred. They didn’t just use the shul; they revered it.
To this day, when I walk into a shul and pause to kiss the mezuzah, I remember Izzy. I remember what it means to love a makom kadosh—to care for it not just when it’s full of people, but even when it stands empty. Because it is never truly empty. It is Hashem’s home. That summer, we may or may not have won the pizza. But we won something far greater: the understanding that a Jew honors a shul not just with presence, but with presence of heart.
Daniel Agalar, founder of Stories to Inspire, is dedicated to sharing uplifting stories from renowned Rabbonim that touch hearts and transform lives. With over 7 million podcast downloads and an ever-growing collection of 5,350+ stories, the platform inspires a global audience through its website at storiestoinspire. org and hotline (718-400-7145). Join the daily WhatsApp broadcast by messaging 310-210-1205 or tune in on Apple and Spotify podcasts to experience timeless wisdom and positivity.
Our Wives Help Us See Our Shortcomings
Does that work the other way as well?
You wake up in the morning and your wife asks you “What did you dream about?” “I dreamt I went grocery shopping.” “Did you remember to get some cucumbers?” “No, I forgot” you answer. “Even in my dreams I’m wrong!”
To understand why our wives are critical of us we look in עירזת. A priest is needed to diagnose a skin condition based on a color chart that God made public.1 If the chart is so public, why is the priest necessary? Why couldn’t one diagnose himself? That’s because “A person sees others’ maladies but not his own.” 2 Does this work the other way too? In other words, are you your wife’s critic? To answer that, let’s ask why was the priest appointed to diagnose the skin condition, and not an elder or a sage? Because criticism needs to be rooted in
love, and who is rooted in love? The priest. 3 God gave us a gift, a helper, that helps us with the diagnosis even when we’re asleep. When we want to dish it out we need to do it with abundant love for shalom bayit.
Shalom Bayit
Rabbi Nir and his wife Atrian give regular classes on Shalom Bayit. His popular 3 minute podcast is funny and draws Shalom Bayit ideas from the Torah portion of the week.
