The Hilarian 2021 - Issue 4

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contents contents editors’ welcome ......3 issue 4 playlist ......5 horoscope ......6

Editors isabel brewer jackson erhart-bruce jenny jung

how to look enigmatic instead of lost in lower napier ......9 a definitive ranking of places to study on campus

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Graphic Design

must-watch list for law students

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JEnny Jung

a white-bread-law-boy’s guide to getting a goth gf

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things to do instead of studying for exams

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Cover art

an elegy to the liggy library stapler

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Jenny Jung

group assignment red flags

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what should you be for halloween?

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clerkship season? I’ve never heard of her

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contributors

bellarose watts christina akele procrastination crossword ....29 flynn wedd jade uyen lam the clerkship maze ....31 maddie mcshane michelle hall

The Hilarian does not represent the opinions and views of the AULSS, nor those of the University of Adelaide Law School



Editors’ welcome Editors’ welcome Editor

TERM FOUR BABY!! Welcome everyone to the last edition of the hilarian for 2021! It’s been a rocky and wild ride getting here but we made it. We’re so excited to break the curse and finally publish an Issue 4. While this is a slightly shorter Issue, you can still look forward to more mean horoscope content, Christina’s movie/tv recommendations, and of course, a banging summer playlist to listen as you read this Issue. Oh, and definitely feel free to procrastinate your exam study by doing a cheeky puzzle or two ;) We would also like to say a big hello to Jackson, our new editor for the forth and final hilarian edition this year. We’re so grateful for his amazing contribution in pulling Issue 4 together. The editing team has changed a lot over the course of 2021 but Jenny, our skilled graphic design queen, has pulled us all together each issue and got the magazine over the line. So a huge props to her and all her lit graphics <3 Well, I guess this means this is more of an Editors’ Goodbye than a Welcome... But we had so much fun creating content and for you and making you laugh (hopefully) this year. While this is the end of the 2021 Hilarian, we are so excited to see what the 2022 Editors come up with :)) Lots of love to all for the final time, Jenny, Isabel and Jackson

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issue 4 playlist issue 4 playlist

ts - slowdive i h n u s e h t when i k s t i l m reach g n i r p al te s cherry-coloured funk - coct out - s eau

a gu e

an’t help myself - alexan d r a s c a v s ci - andrea laszlo de simon ior e eatle rra de ba

t e S v e n ns a j f u S e v o l f o y r e t yM s ens & angelo de augustine Girl - The b v e t s n a l u fj s twin

ie car e y e - david bow j o ni rn lov m i t c h mode requin chagrin f i r s t el phore l o v e/

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sema


how many drinks will it take me to want to sleep with your zodiac sign? Words by: jenny jung

It’s me, your favourite horoscope bitch, back with another unnecessarily blunt and aggressive read of your zodiac signs. This time, I will be judging your sign’s likeability, sex appeal and general attractiveness based on the foolproof metric known as ‘the number of drinks it’d hypothetically take me to go back to yours for some adult fun’. Huge, very big, large emphasis on ‘hypothetically’ - I am taken, we’re happily committed, etc.

Aries

Aries women, while oozing sex appeal and having a seemingly endless well of confidence and brilliance, are intimidating as all hell. I would need at least 2 shots of vodka (measured by the lady from that one vine if you’re like me and can’t let go of vine references still) purely to work up the courage to make a move on you ladies. Aries men, not gonna lie, you come across as kinda creepy… Huge himbo energy, though. 4 vodka redbulls. And even then, gonna have to consult the girls in the bathroom to make the final decision.

Taurus Taureans in general have a soft, approachable demeanour. I wouldn’t hook up with you, especially not the Taurus ladies. I think I’d want to be friends, cuddle, go op-shopping etc. with you first and see where the relationship goes from there. But for the sake of this article, I’m going to say 2 gin and tonics sculled within 10 minutes, because let’s be honest, you’re not going to make the first move and I’d be crazy to approach someone sober.

gemini Gemini men. Three words: Stone cold sober. You guys are too witty. You probably have that one repertoire of facts/interesting philosophical takes saved, memorised and ready to go to hook people in. I am people. Gemini women, on the other hand, I feel are quite unapproachable and blunt for their own good. I don’t think we’d hit it off, I think I’d probably call you a bitch to my friends - at least 5 drinks.

cancer I’d say maybe only 3 drinks to want to hook up, but will probably end up becoming an alcoholic trying to cope with the aftermath of hooking up with a cancer - especially cancer men. Y’all really suck. You’ll probably convince me that you care about me and want more than just a one night stand, and then ghost me/break my heart.

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leo I would probably have to be blackout drunk to be attracted to you in such short notice. You’re probably the type of person to think that they’re the shit but have impossible standards so you never end up getting any action. You could come across as almost snobby and disinterested a lot of the time.

Virgo

Virgo men, please leave me alone. If you’re looking for someone to patronise, criticise and invalidate, I am not the woman for you. I feel like you’d act like a complete ass and when I clap back at you you’re going to call me an ugly bitch - pissed to the point of getting my stomach pumped. Virgo women, don’t get me wrong, you are unmistakably sexy. I just don’t think I could handle your ‘gaslight gatekeep girlboss’ energy long enough to survive the uber ride back to yours. 2 absinth shots so that I can’t register whatever bullshit you’re spewing.

libra Libra men are generally charming, appearance wise. However, I can’t help but feel like they’re just constantly judging me. Plus, you guys are kind of boring, sorry. I’m going to say 3 cocktails to keep sipping on to lessen the boredom of having to talk to you. The ladies tend to be better, and a lot of the time Libra women are the loveliest people you’ll meet. However, you’ll always have to live with the anxiety of trying to find out whether they really like you, or if they’re just faking it to indulge their own people-pleasing tendencies. I rate 2 quick glasses of social lubricant just to match their energy.

scorpio

One tall glass of PLEASE DADDY.

sAGITTARIUS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

capricorn AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

AQUARIUS Aquarius men suck ass, seriously. Probably the meanest sun sign for a guy. But maybe after like 5 bourbon shots I’ll start to get turned on by their patronising, demeaning, degrading way of speaking to me.

Pisces I’m going to say just one thing to sum up Pisces men: Machine Gun ‘I am weed’ Kelly is a Pisces man and the perfect representation of one at that. So I think you’ll understand when I say ‘however many drinks it will take for me to get alcohol poisoning and be escorted out of the venue’ for this one. Pisces women are alright, though, just don’t wrong them in any way if you don’t want to be psychically attacked.

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how to look enigmatic instead of lost in napier Words by: maddie mcshane Napier: A hotchpotch of faculties at the best of times, a lobby for lost souls at the worst. With the usual path between Ligertwood and the rest of Uni being obstructed by construction for what seems like literally no reason at all, the new transit route to your 2 pm seminar has never looked less favourable. Up the stairs, out, around, who knows really? Let’s face it, you’re going to get confused in Napes sometime soon, so you might as well look intriguing doing it.

make haste

loiter in the stairwell

Money is time and time is best spent outside of the Napier building. Make your way through the building in a brisk walk or, even better, a light jog, to communicate to everyone how incredibly busy you are. This is a good opportunity to wear a skirt so that you can hitch it and take the stairs two at a time. Your trot will leave everyone wondering what you could possibly be dashing off to, and whether they can come too.

Nothing is certain in life but death, taxes, and the inherent loiterability of stairwells. A historically reputed location to cry, sing, and deposit your new graffiti tag. This is also a prime location to linger and convey an intense air of mystery. For maximum effect, you can take this opportunity to lean back on the banister and gaze out of the window longingly. Are you pensively reflecting on your state of mind? Pining for a love that will never be your own? Taking a moment to grieve the loss of your dead husband? No one will ever know, an amusement which will add to the thrill of your theatrical escapades.

accost a stranger Confidently approaching strangers is a brilliant way to ensure you are perceived as mystifying and intriguing. By affronting them with a bold question, like “Where are the buns, bunny boy?” or “Where can I find the law building?” You are sure to catch them off guard and assert that you have the upper hand in the interaction. They will leave perplexed and wanting to know more.

As someone probably once said, there is a yearning, sexually repressed enigma within all of us. The Liggy-Nap funnel is the ultimate place to let it out.

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definitive ranking ranking of of places places to to aa definitive study on on campus campus study

words by: flynn wedd

authored by a jaded law student

Over the last three gruelling years that I’ve been spent at this university, I have always struggled finding the right spot to study – until now. Enjoy.

9. unibar

8. hub level 4

As the popular adage goes, “never mix business with pleasure”. This should ring especially true for those who have ever dared to study at the Unibar. Too many times I have been studiously attending to my homework, only to receive an invite to share a beer at the Unibar. DO NOT GO. You will regret it. One beer will turn into seven, and next thing you know, you’ve missed two compulsory tutorials and you’re contemplating whether you should attend your third absolutely sauced. Anyone who claims they can successfully study at the Unibar without being peer-pressured into getting a jug is a liar.

I admit it, this was my go-to study spot in my first year of uni. If you’re foolish enough to study here, you’ll likely spend what feels like an endless epoch searching for an available table. Even in the rare event that you’re successful, you’ll find that the table is tiny and inexplicably sticky. Would not recommend as a study spot if you don’t have a pair of noise cancelling headphones to block out the incessant commotion caused by the line at Taste Baguette.

7. ligertwood

Ah yes, our beloved Liggy. I will probably be ostracised by my fellow law students for placing this one so low on the list – but I assure you, I have my reasons. First, the building is some sort of ugly Frankenstein mix of mid-century and contemporary gothic architecture (not to mention the gross pebble veneer cladding). But more importantly, the underground study spaces are simply devoid of life. While I have rarely ventured down to the Liggy dungeons, each time I do, I endure a sensory onslaught of stale air and glaring fluorescent lights. I still recall my first occasion studying in the Liggy during SWOTVAC and wondering why everyone down here looks so miserable. Seriously, the stress in the air was almost palpable. Although, it isn’t all bad. The people that populate the interior of the building are some of the nicest and approachable people I know (not to mention the glorious coffee from St. Raphael’s cart).

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6. HUB LEVEL 3 Unless you enjoy sitting on chairs with miscellaneous stains and vending machine coffee that sits in your stomach like a biohazard, I’d advise you study elsewhere. For the select few that are somehow able to book one of the study rooms without getting kicked out by some arrogant high school students – I hope you enjoy the poor ventilation and nauseatingly bright wallpaper.

5. MEZZANINE Studied here once in late 2019. This place has an ambient room temperature of about 70 degrees Celsius. I’m aware that hot air rises and all, but seriously man wtf. This place is a furnace. Please do not study here on a hot summer day – you will not be able to focus. Perhaps my opinion would be more favourable if I had tried studying here on a cooler day – but until that day, I’d advise studying elsewhere.

4. BARR-SMITH LEVEL 1 If it wasn’t for constant wi-fi outages, this place would be higher on the list. A genuinely good place to study. Plenty of sequestered study spaces for those who value their privacy and peace and quiet while studying.

3. BARR-SMITH LEVEL 3 My most frequented study spot. The recent renovation has provided new hardwood tables, plenty of charging ports and chairs with actual lumbar support (if that’s important to you lmao). I am particularly a fan of the tables lined along the windows, offering views of the Barr-Smith lawns and Union House. Best of all, this space is open 24/7. Would highly recommend this study space to all.

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2. OUTSIDE

This one might be a bit polarising. If you are a nature loving, outdoors enthusiast then I’m sure this is the right fit for you. On the other hand, if you are a vitamin-D deficient ghoul – the chances are if you’re a law student you probably are - then I’m afraid this might not be the spot for you. There are plenty of outdoors study spaces at our university, most notably the tables on the Maths lawns and of course, how could I leave out the outdoor tables at the Liggy courtyard. Personally, my go-to outdoors study spot is between the Physics building and Radford Auditorium (the table beneath a large tree).

1. READING ROOM This is it. The objectively best study spot on campus. Need I explain my decision any further? I mean, just look at it. You’re surrounded by a wealth of knowledge on all sides and you’ll never be without company, with the likes of Sir Douglas Mawson and Lord Howard Walter Florey glaring at you from the walls. Granted, studying here requires the highest level of stealth, as even the slightest movement will be reverberated across the entire room, prompting vengeful stares from fellow students. Also, given the lack of climate control in the building, during the colder winter months you would be prudent to wear extra layers. Apart from that, this spot really is the best place to study on campus. In fact, I’m so confident of my decision that I guarantee if you study here regularly you will receive constant HD’s.

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must-watch movies & tv shows Words by: christina akele We’ve done it! It’s the last stretch of the university year, but for us law students that means plenty of study and readings to keep us occupied. With this in mind, there is nothing like a classic law-related movie or TV show to get us in the studying mood! Once again, keep reading for the perfect film to watch after end-of-year exams. This movie, which has absolutely no affiliation with law, is sure to help you recover from SWOT VAC stress, exam-room nerves, and put a smile on your face!

Movies worth (2020) It has been 20 years since the tragedy of 9/11 irrevocably changed the course of history. With countless documentaries and films centring on the event, Worth is definitely a mustwatch for law students. Worth ticks all the boxes of a successful drama: It has a fabulous cast and a gripping script exploring themes that remain pertinent to this day. The film follows the true story of Kenneth Feinberg (Michael Keaton), a lawyer tasked with the role of determining how much money should be distributed to the victims’ families and partners following the terrorist attacks. The film navigates Feinberg’s role, the obstacles he is forced to overcome, and his efforts–as well as the efforts of his colleagues–to ensure that all victims receive as much compensation as possible under the fund. Ultimately, this movie will prompt you to question how much a life is truly worth.

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hand-picked for law students a time to kill (1988) Finally, a John Grisham novel adaptation on one of these lists! In fairness, this was inevitable. Before I summarise the premise for this film, I would like to warn you that this film does contain some really confronting images regarding rape and violence. Please be conscious of that if you decide to watch this film! The plot follows young Mississippi lawyer, Jake Brigance (Matthew McConaughey), whose client is Carl Lee Hailey (Samuel L. Jackson), an African-American man living in a town plagued by racism and racial prejudice; on trial for the murder of two men who brutally raped and almost killed his ten-year-old daughter. The film follows Jake’s journey throughout the trial and documents how it not only impacts his life professionally, but his personal life also. The story is emotional—and devastating at times—but through this emotion it highlights the importance of unwavering resilience in the face of injustice and adversity.

a cry in the dark (1988) Once again, a disclaimer in regard to this film, which also deals with confronting content. This movie tells the true story of Lindy Chamberlain (Meryl Streep) and her family, whose lives are irreversibly changed when their daughter, Azaria, is killed by a dingo while the family is camping near Uluru. While not technically a legal film, the movie shows the trial and explores the extreme media attention faced by the

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Chamberlains, as well as the intense public scrutiny directed towards Lindy Chamberlain in particular. Overall, this film—through a well-written script and talented acting—really provides some context regarding the aftermath of the tragic and infamous event that took place at Uluru. Students interested in criminal law, especially Australian criminal law, should definitely give this film a watch!

tv show Impeachment: American Crime Story (2021) I started watching this show recently and all I can say is that I am absolutely hooked! Like The People vs OJ Simpson: American Crime Story, this Ryan-Murphy produced series focuses on one of America’s most famous trials (which gripped the world): The impeachment of former US President Bill Clinton. The TV Show covers the Clinton-Lewinsky scandal, which prompted an intense investigation, leading to charges (including that of perjury) being made against Clinton. Ultimately this resulted in his impeachment trial. With a powerhouse cast: Including, Beanie Feldstein as Monica Lewinsky and Sarah Paulson, who gives a truly compelling performance; transforming into Linda Tripp (the woman who famously secretly recorded conversations with Lewinsky, who in turn, believed Tripp to be a friend and confidante). On the whole, this series is quite compelling. It looks at these historical events through a unique lens, which may make us question or change the way we look at the famous scandal.

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WHAT TO WATCH AFTER A 2 HOUR EXAM? MAMMA MIA! (2008) What do you get when you combine a beloved jukebox-musical, based on the iconic songs by Swedish pop-group ABBA, and a star-studded cast? Mamma Mia! For those who do not know the premise of this wonderfully vibrant movie-musical (I would be genuinely surprised if you didn’t), it follows over-worked single-mother, Donna Sheridan (played by none other than Meryl Streep), who runs a run-down hotel on the beautiful and unfortunately fictional Greek Island, “Kalokairi”. Soon to be married, her daughter, Sophie (Amanda Seyfried), finds her mother’s diary and secretly discovers that she has three potential fathers (played by Pierce Brosnan, Colin Firth and Stellan Skarsgård) who Donna has not seen in 20 years; only for her to invite them to the island for her wedding. Mayhem ensues, but this just enhances the film’s positivity, comedy, and choreographed dance numbers that will no doubt leave you with a smile. In any event, this film is possibly the best movie to watch to unwind. Forget about studying and prepare for the summer holidays!

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the the white-bread-law-boy’s white-bread-law-boy’s guide guide to to getting getting aa goth goth gf gf It’s spooky season and Halloween is right around the corner, which can only mean one thing: You are now officially running out of time to acquire your dream goth gf - what a nightmare. It appears to me that it is often the blandest, most uninteresting of men who are starving for a goth/ alternative babe. I can also understand that because of your lack of knowledge on essential topics like the works of William Blake, Doc Martens shoes and the discography of British postpunk band the Cure, it is especially hard for you to achieve this life goal of yours. Alternative/goth girls are not that hard to impress here in Adelaide, given that most people have very limited experience with the subculture, and will usually swoon over the first guy who can demonstrate surface-level knowledge in one of our interests. So, being the humanitarian I am, I’m here to provide you with some basic phrases to try out so that you can finally plus one that goth babe you’ve been pining over to your fellow basic friend’s Halloween party and show her off.

‘So have you seen that Joy Division biopic, Control?’ Goths listen to Joy Division like an average private-school-alumni-law-boy stockpiles rugby jumpers. While it may be tempting to go the easy route and play Love Will Tear Us Apart in the car like the rest of the basic white boys, going that extra mile and watching the biopic will score you some extra points.

‘Can you tell me what my birth chart says about me?’ If you’ve fallen for the irresistable and alluring charm of a witchy gal, this is the line for you. For this to develop into an extensive conversation, however, you must know your birth time (to the minute if possible) and location, so make sure to text your mum before trying this out. From there, this can go one of two ways: you either have a great birth chart with minimal water and/or earth signs, or you have the chart of the devil, which will make her run for her life. Either way though, this question is guaranteed to turn into a fruitful conversation, and maybe (hopefully) it might serve as your

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much needed introduction to ~introspection~.

‘Ah yes, this painting is quite derivative of Salvador Dali’ Got an art gallery date planned, or has your desperate eye noticed a mysterious, all-black wearing girl admiring a surrealist painting at the gallery? Try this line and watch her eyes light up with hope that maybe, just maybe, despite your RMs, you are actually a man of culture. How to spot a surrealist painting, you ask? Just look for dismembered/disfigured bodies and things in places where it shouldn’t be. When in doubt, find something your conservative grandmother might label satanic. Warning: this will backfire and make you look like a clown if the painting isn’t actually derivative of Salvador Dali.

‘I definitely understand the merit and utility of modern-day Satanism’ So you’ve just found out that the person of your dreams is a self-proclaimed satanist? Instead of sweating profusely and making the conversation uncomfortable by mentioning you went to a

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Christian/Catholic private school, hit her up with this line, regardless of your understanding of satanism. And don’t worry, she probably - likely - will not sacrifice you to satan (no guarantees). And with that, I would like to wish you luck, comrade, in your search for a goth gf. Remember, we’re in this together. xx


things you can do instead of studying for your exams Words by: jackson erhart-bruce

With exam season fast approaching— *depression intensifies* —and the teaching staff looking even more sadistic than usual, the Hilarian editorial team has finally decided to answer the question that no one’s been asking: What on earth do I do with all my free time? Here are some suggestions…

Take up a hobby A new hobby can be a great way to procrastinate exam prep, while also letting your friends know that you are a fun and interesting person. The benefit of a hobby is that it comes without that pesky little thing called guilt, allowing you to waste your life away in perfect bliss! Don’t worry, you may have failed your contracts exam, but at least you have become a more emotionally and culturally well-rounded person (whatever that means).

play a sport Ah, sports. I put to you a situation: You are in the library, ground floor, when suddenly you find yourself craving a coffee from St Raph’s (your seventh that day). Unable to restrain your raging caffeine addiction, you stand up, make your way to the staircase, and start climbing; But it’s too much, with each step you find yourself growing weaker, your legs quivering as they strain to keep you upright. You are panting now, coughing with every step. You are so close

but you just can’t make it, if only you had exercised more. Three stairs from the top you crumble, your weak spine (the trait of a law student) folding harder than a first year against confrontation. You are defeated. Does this sound familiar? If so maybe try a sport… or a doctor.

read a book There is nothing quite like the feel of an Ernest Hemmingway novel in your hands, as you careful tilt the cover to show people that you are indeed an intellectual. Books let everyone, from friends to people in your general vicinity, know that you are smarter than them. My personal recommendations include The Narrow Road to the Deep North, a harrowing tale with the type of cover and width that scream ‘I’m better than you’. However, The Odyssey is also an excellent choice, in the original ancient Greek of course.

Join the AULSS (committee) If you’re still stuck for ideas, why not apply for the LSS. Thirsty for members and better looking on a resume than your GPA, LSS positions can be a great way to procrastinate assignments— er, I mean further your legal career, in a fun and challenging way. Editor’s note: smart people might point out that all these activities are technically hobbies, lucky I don’t see many of those around.

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elegy elegyfor forthe theliggy liggylibrary library stapler stapler Roses are red Violets are blue
 I hate this stapler
 No I mean it
 I really I hate it You know, the black one at the front desk that always jams
 I had two minutes before the start of class
 And wanted to staple my print-out slides together
 And this dumb stapler jams
 Again
 And I have to ask the librarian for help
 He looks at me with contempt and smirks
 “These kids are supposed to settle my divorce suit
 And they can’t even use a bleedin stapler” And I went red in the face and said that’s not true I do know how to use a stapler
 I’ll have you know I got a high credit for Contract Law
 So you better start sucking up to me for when that pre-nup hits...

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Ya flog (I didn’t actually say this, he was kind of scary but could you imagine??) Anyway this is not really a poem can someone from AULSS just use the law ball cash to buy a new stapler, thanks



Group project red flags Group project red flags

Words by: jade uyen lam

Group assignments can be complicated. Here are some warning signs to identify problem members, before you get too deep (not that this will help very much):

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1

poor communication It seems like they never listen to you or understand you. Disagreements never seem to be resolved.

ghosts you for days Your messages are always unread or left on read, but you can clearly see them active.

3

doesn’t wanna meet up They’re always too busy for you but you see them out with someone else on their IG story.

makes you do all the work They never put any effort in, and you find yourself constantly doing their work.

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2

4

Always has excuses Whenever you confront them, they have excuses like ‘sorry I’ve been really busy’ or ‘omg I swear I replied back to you!!’

You’re never a priority They’re always complaining about another assignment due or staying up too late to finish something else.

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Sound like someone in your group? If not it’s probably you.


what should you be for halloween? Words by: bellarose watts

first letter of your first name

first letter of your last name

A - Spooky B - Magical C - Dancing D - Scary E - Zombie F - Sleepy G - Cheerful H - Drunk I - Silly J - Dead K - Mysterious L - Sparkly M - Scary N - Killer O - Sexy P - Haunted Q - Terrifying R - Ghostly S - Laughing T - Crying U - Peaceful V - Vampire W - Happy X - Royal Y - Crazy Z - Anxious

A - RM Williams B - Mooting competitor C - Redeemable assignment D - Bec and Bridge dress E - In-person exam F - Ligertwood G - AGLC H - Disposable mask I - St Raph’s coffee J - Copy of the Hilarian K - AULSS member L - MacBook Pro M - Thesis N - Case notes O - Law clerk P - Wayville invigilator Q - Law library book R - Franc De Zwart S - Tote bag T - Unopened textbook U - Mark Giancaspro V - 3 piece suit W - Law school dropout X - Mimosa Y - Seminar leader Z - Country road jumper 25



clerkship clerkship season? season? I’ve I’ve never never heard heard of of her her Words by: isabel brewer “I don’t even really want one, I’m just applying for a bit of joke,” said every fourthand fifth-year law student lying through their teeth. Late July and early August is a dreaded time in the law school. Mid-semester break is almost done, exam results have been cried over, and of course, it’s uniform clerkship season. Every law student’s inbox is inundated with reminders to apply, information on how to apply, and the subtle message behind not applying: you’ll never get a job. Anyone in third year or below has likely skipped this article, as they are yet to understand what exactly a clerkship is, or why they should so desperately want one. Telling them about it would be like telling a child Father Christmas isn’t real. “I really don’t want to go into corporate law,” said fifth-year student Hannah, while she opened the Dentons Fisher Jeffries,

HWL Ebsworth, Johnson, Winter and Slattery, Kain Lawyers, Lynch Meyer, Mellor Olsson, MinterEllison, Norman Waterhouse and Thomson Geer websites to their respective clerkship information pages. “I just think I would be more suited to family or crim, or maybe even work in policy,” she continued, while taking down the dates applications closed, as well as when offers would come out. “I truly don’t think I would accept one, even if I got something,” Hannah sighed, as she started updating her resume with her recent accolades, and downloaded a copy of her transcript from Access Adelaide. The Hilarian can neither confirm nor deny if Hannah has been successful in acquiring the clerkship she didn’t really want. Sources say she is still checking her emails around the clock.

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Words by: michelle hall

Cryptic Law Crossword. The excuse you’ve been looking for to avoid starting that exam prep you know youshould be doing.

aulss end of semester procrastinator

down

across

1. An oldie but a goodie! A movie from the ‘80s witha hot Harrison Ford mixing it with the Amish. 2. As exams approach, the forlorn and stressedgather, like moths to a Flaming Lamborghini. 4. Stop drinking those chi chi Mimosas at the LawBall and get real with my mate, Harvey. 5. Saul can’t help you now. It might be time towatch ‘The Sopranos’ and get some tips! 6. Let me speak for you. Trust me, I’m a lawyer! 9. Rick Springfield may have lost the argument, butat least he’s feeling dirty after cute conversation. 12. Often what is sought but never found in a courtof law. 14. Major Tom would be proud. 16. When rowing mixes with property law the interest

3. There’s something about those beans. No start to the daywould be complete without it! 7. Once upon a time, amongst the crispy and auspiciouspages, Law scholars acquired myopia and vitamin Ddeficiency. 8. Our beloved building to all who study Law. 10. Dad jokes and Adidas get us through the legal basics. 11. Move aside Sir Galahad, this crusade is going global! 13. An engineers’ wet dream. 15. Sir H Parkes et al made Australian history with this legalopus. 19 ‘Let’s make it into a comic book! They’re bound to get it then’ he chortled.

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solution

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help the law student find a clerkship! :0 words by: jade uyen lam

flip page for solution ;)

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JK there is no way out... you thought you’d find a clerkship? that’s kinda pathetic lol

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