The Black Sheep Hav
e a Free n a ...li we ke so a b me ird su ! mm
er!
• a college newspaper that’s actually about college •
Volume 2, Issue 6 4/26/12 - 5/12/12
theblacksheeponline.com @BlackSheep_VT
Dr. Seuss Speaks about the Stadium Woods Debate Sam Howard wrote this On Washington Street where the freshman all sleep and wait every week for the newest Black Sheep and not a sound could be heard, not one single peep were the Woods at Virginia Tech. And deep behind the tennis courts, some people say, if you look deep enough you can still see, today, where the woods once stood just as long as they could before somebody chopped the woods away. Why were the woods chopped down in a heap? from the far end of town where the freshman all sleep? Coach Beamer still lives here. Ask him. He knows. You won’t see the Beamer. Won’t see him at all. He stays in his Field House until the fall. He stays in that house till it’s time to recruit, when the freshman come visit in their newly-bought suits And on special Saturdays in September, he coaches In hopes that an NCAA title approaches And if you listen closely, you might hear him say He’ll tell you how the woods were lifted away. He’ll tell you, perhaps... if you’re there on game day.
Other stuff
Inside
The practice facility! It’s much too small! There’s no room for the whole team to practice at all! Running mile after mile in the fresh morning breeze. But once inside they all stand knee to knee Doing their drills and reading playbooks With so little room that reporters can’t look All my life I’ve been searching for land such as this. However these trees are historic People may get pissed. I hope these complaints can be dismissed for a new practice facility is too good to resist. I submitted a proposal; clearing the woods would seem meager Sent it straight to the office if President Steger A third of them gone shouldn’t upset them at all If it leads to a national title come fall. In no time at all, we had drawn up plans. For a facility that met all the program’s demands. And with LT’s skillful skill and his great speedy speed, This new facility might give us a title indeed! The instant I’d drawn it, I heard a loud “HEY!” I turned around. I saw a small man pop out of the ground.
He was shortish. And oldish. And acted quite silly. He sounded like Frank from Always Sunny in Philly “Mister!” he said with a sawdusty sneeze, “I am the Lorax. You already know me. Stop this plot right now, I’m asking you, please. And I’m asking you, sir, “many joined in his chorus“What’s that THING you want to put in my forest?” “Look, pal,” I said.” There’s no cause for alarm. There’s plenty of trees left. I mean you no harm. I’m being quite useful. This building’s a need. A need that will let us do all sorts of good deeds! It’s a gym. We can practice. We can punt, we can catch. Even a Sugar Bowl ref could see that. You can use it for soccer. For warmups! For track! Once this building is built the national titles will stack!” He said, “Sir! You’re shitting me. No indoor practice building could replace all those trees!” The debate still kept going, on signs and in papers. For football or forest, neither side would waiver Plenty of Hokies sided with the Lorax While just as many wanted the indoor track Whatever you support, be it nature or games We here at The Black Sheep love all of you the same.
oh my god, they’re all so good man, hahahah!!!
Justin from Tots got mad skills from playing Fruit Ninja.
Peace out drunk bitch, i hope we never hold your hair again.
see page 4
see page 9
see page 12
A Review of Downtown Cupcake (On 4/20)
Bartender of the Issue
The People You Won’t Miss