This week in fake news... Confusion at the Vatican and awkward dinner revelations
University of Wisconsin-Madison
Men’s basketball prepares for Big Ten tournament +SPORTS, page 8
Complete campus coverage since 1892
Weekend, March 15-17, 2013
UW scientists advance stem cell research Study could be step toward curing Parkinson’s disease For the first time, University of Wisconsin-Madison researchers successfully implanted stem cells generated from skin cells into the region of a monkey’s brain that was affected by Parkinson’s disease, according to a study released Thursday. UW-Madison neuroscience professor Su-Chun Zhang, the lead researcher on the project, extracted cells from three monkeys’ skin and turned them into stem cells, which are cells that have not yet been differentiated to fit a specific purpose in the body.
In his research Zhang changed the Induced Pluripotent Stem cells, derived from non-embryonic cells, into the dopamine-creating cells and implanted in an area of the monkeys’ brains that contained a lesion causing Parkinson’s disease. Parkinson’s disease is a degenerative disorder of the central nervous system, which results from the death of dopamine-creating cells. It causes behavioral and cognitive problems, including shaking, dementia and slow movement, and currently has no cure. One of the major setbacks in previous stem cell research was immune rejection, which occurs when a patient’s body rejects stem cells because they come from another source. This research marks an important step in solving the issue, Zhang said, because his research created stem cells
from the monkey’s own body, which prevents immune rejection. Zhang said the implanted stem cells integrated so well into the monkeys’ brains that they were virtually indistinguishable from normal cells. Researchers hope to apply the same idea from this study to treat other diseases, according to Zhang. He added they hope to use the procedure in human clinics, after further documented success. Moving forward, Zhang said his team will continue to monitor the monkeys to ensure no side effects develop from the surgeries and to see if the integrated cells help diminish or cure the effects of Parkinson’s. “I think it’s quite unique for UW to lead this part,” Zhang said. “So I feel really honored to do this kind of work here.” —Sam Cusick
Czech your taste buds
WUD Global Connections and International Student Services hosts their fourth Taste of Cultures Thursday, featuring the cuisine of the Czech Republic. + Photo by Nithin Charlly
Ward, WISPIRG continue to spar over staff funding contracts By Cheyenne Langkamp the daily cardinal
University of WisconsinMadison Chancellor David Ward said in a statement Thursday he has not signed contracts to fully fund a campus organization because the request does not adhere to UW System policies.
“Without our voice we lose our power.” James Lanser/the daily cardinal
HR project team leader Bob Lavigna presented an update on the redesign at three public forums on campus this week.
Human Resources design forums see large turnout Three human resources design forums earlier in the week brought large crowds from the campus community to hear updates on the plan’s implementation, which will begin July 1. HR design team leader Bob Lavigna said he expected large turnouts because there has been continual interest in the project since its release last fall from campus stakeholders. According to Lavigna, many forum attendees asked how the change will affect them directly, but he said the team will be in a “better
position” to answer these questions as they continue work on the plan. “Everyone is quite interested in what this new system is going to look like and how they will be able to continue to learn about it and become engaged in the process,” Lavigna said. The project team will take input from the forums to a recently created committee consisting of representatives from all shared governance groups, including labor and non-represented classified employ-
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Emily Ten Eyck board chair WISPIRG
Last year Ward refused to sign contracts allowing student segregated fees to fund the Wisconsin Public Interest Research Group’s
non-university staff positions despite receiving a recommendation from the Student Services Finance Committee, the student government body that oversees the allocation of these funds, to grant the contracts. In the statement, Ward cited UW System policy F50, which says non-university staff positions can only be funded through the Campus Services Fund. According to Ward, this fund is “outwardfacing,” meaning the student government needs to identify the need for staff services and then request contract approval. This differs from the process WISPIRG took in applying for the contract from the General Student Services Fund that is allocated through SSFC. Ward approved the remainder of the group’s budget at
$55,571.17. “I believe WISPIRG can continue to operate effectively on campus, as many WISPIRG members have shared with me its successes over the past year,” Ward said in the statement. The statement also said Ward will continue to govern student funding under this interpretation of the F50 policy. However, WISPIRG Board Chair Emily Ten Eyck said Ward is going against students’ wishes by refusing to sign the contract, citing a recent petition to “Save WISPIRG” that garnered signatures from more than 10 percent of the student body. “It’s such an easy issue to mobilize students around because without our voice we lose our power,” Ten Eyck said.
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Wisconsin Film Festival tickets to go on sale Saturday Tickets for the Wisconsin Film Festival, the largest campus-based film festival in the country, will go on sale Saturday. The festival will provide audiences with eight consecutive days of documentaries, comedies, classics and films from around Wisconsin, beginning April 11. The renowned “Wisconsin’s Own” films, which will be
shown at the festival, are created by filmmakers with ties to the Badger state. Even closer to campus, the film “56 Up” features University of Wisconsin-Madison engineering professor Nick Hitchon as one of its subjects. The festival will kick off with the Crystal Ball benefit Friday from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. at the Hilldale Shopping Center.
Food, drinks and sneak previews to this year’s films will be provided. Tickets for the benefit are $25 in advance and $30 at the door. Advance tickets for the festival can be purchased on the film festival website or at Union South for $8 or $5 with a student ID. During the festival, regular tickets will cost $10 or $5 with a student ID.
“…the great state University of Wisconsin should ever encourage that continual and fearless sifting and winnowing by which alone the truth can be found.”
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hi 37º / lo 24º
hi 28º / lo 18º
hi 30º / lo 27º
chance of sad
chance of happy
chance is GONE
Weekend, March 15-17, 2013
An independent student newspaper, serving the University of Wisconsin-Madison community since 1892 Volume 122, Issue 105
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firstname.lastname@example.org Editor in Chief Scott Girard
Vatican forced to hastily pick pope after intern sends up white smoke
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By Regina Phalange FAKE NEWS FRIDAY
graphic by Angel Lee
One of Chancellor Rebecca Black’s first initiatives will be an overhaul of the campus bus system, transitioning to convertables instead, all of which have one seat available to avoid seat-choice dilemas.
Rebecca Black to be chancellor after typo By Oliver Love fake news friday
The University of Wisconsin System Board of Regents acknowledged a spelling error Thursday in the contract for the University of Wisconsin-Madison chancellor position that gave the job to singer Rebecca Black and not Dr. Rebecca Blank. Blank, the acting U.S. Secretary of Commerce, was one of four finalists for the position, all of whom have attained a doctorate degree. Black, who performs hit single “Friday” and the less-famous “My Moment,” is 15 years old. “I appreciate that they meant to choose me,” Blank said, as she listened to the viral video hit in an attempt to better understand Black. “But I am somewhat glad not to be tied to a university that would make such a mistake. This song is catchy, though.”
Black was surprised at the news but couldn’t wait to take on a new opportunity after already winning the Internet. While Black didn’t have time to consider her main goals for her chancellor tenure between studying for her math test on long division and reading “To Kill a Mockingbird” for her English class, she said she wants to stay true to her principles. These include only serving cereal for breakfast, mandatory 7 a.m. wake-up times and replacing all campus bus routes with convertibles. “I just hope everyone can figure out which seat they can take,” Black said. “But they are in college, and I was only in middle school when I did it, so I’m sure it will work out.” UW System President Kevin Reilly refused to comment on the story beyond saying, “We’ll talk
in one year when this is all over,” referencing the yearlong term before the system can opt out of the contract. UW students had mixed emotions, but many wanted to give Black the benefit of the doubt. “Her song went viral, and it really gets stuck in your head, even if you only hear like two words from it, so I hope she can bring that notoriety to the university,” said junior Kylie Tanner. “Maybe we can use a mash-up of ‘Friday’ and ‘Call Me Maybe’ to really attract students.” Upon hearing the idea, Black immediately called Carly Rae Jepsen and offered her an assistant chancellorship. Some students think this move signifies great progress for the university, although half of the undergraduate population un-enrolled after hearing about the hire for no apparent reason.
Student rejoices after being told his conception was accidental By Kane Kaiman FAKE NEWS FRIDAY
Much to the surprise of his family, University of WisconsinMadison freshman Daniel Garner was thrilled to find out Saturday his parents had not planned on his conception. The shocking revelation was made inadvertently at one of the Garner Family’s bi-weekly “Taco Night” dinners this Saturday evening. “Danny and Mike were really getting into it about the War in Afghanistan, and Danny kept saying it was a mistake. Then Mike was like, ‘Oh, a mistake? Speaking of mistakes... ’ and just sort of trailed off,” recounted
Garner’s sister Amanda. “Danny asked Mom and Dad what he was talking about.” Daniel’s parents had no choice but to tell their son the truth: There was never meant to be a third Garner child. Garner’s reaction shocked everyone at the table, especially his brother Michael. “There was an awkward silence, Daniel didn’t say anything for a while, and then he got this crazy grin on his face,” Michael said. He looked up whispered, ‘This... is... AWESOME.’ We were speechless.” Garner himself had a lot to say to the throng of Daily Cardinal reporters who congre-
gated outside his bedroom window after dinner. “Okay, so at first, I was like, ‘Whoa, not cool,’ but then it hit me: My first big break was when my parents messed up. My second was being the first sperm to the egg. What’s the probability on that? One in a billion?” He went on to say, “I’m not even supposed to be here! It’s like I’m living on borrowed time. I think I’ll go sky-diving.” This reaction comes as a relief to the Garner parents who had been living in fear of this moment ever since the neighbor girl found out she was adopted and pierced her tongue in a show of rebellion.
Cardinals Wednesday announced the election of Jorge Mario Bergoglio, who will take the name Francis, as the 266th pope of the Roman Catholic Church after an incompetent papal intern accidentally released white smoke instead of black. In conclave tradition, black smoke is released when the cardinals have not selected a pope and white is released when they have. When white smoke was seen after the fifth ballot, many were shocked at the speed of the choice— the fastest in over 100 years. But unbeknownst to the public, the true cause of that white smoke was Kyle Ratzinger, firstyear papal intern. Ratzinger was SnapChatting his girlfriend during Vatican Orientation Day last week and panicked when he was assigned to conclave smoke duty. “The buttons for black and white look really similar,” Ratzinger said on Instagram Wednesday night in a caption accompanying a distraught-looking selfie of him in his official robes. After the white smoke was seen, media swarmed the Sistine Chapel in anticipation of an official announcement and many world news sources began streaming live coverage. In an effort to save face, several of the cardinal finalists for pope engaged in a hasty series of rock-paper-scissors matches and one thumb war to determine a winner. “He’s the first Latin American pope we’ve ever had, and a lot of people are saying it’s because the Vatican wants to acknowledge the large Catholic population in that region,” said a Vatican spokesperson in a statement late Wednesday night. “What they don’t know is it’s his fast thumbs and daring choice of paper over rock in the face of adversity that really clinched it for him.” The Vatican has given no official word on what will happen to Ratzinger, although his Twitter seems to indicate he has been relegated to making the cardinals’ coffee and sulking in the chapel playing Angry Birds. “they even took my cool hat away :(,” said Ratzinger’s most recent Tweet.“verynotcoolman. #everybodymakesmistakes.”
Weekend, March 15-17, 2013 3
Edgewater plan sees minor changes City officials recently approved minor adjustments to the Edgewater Hotel renovation plan as construction on the project continues. Ald. Bridget Maniaci, District 2, said she and Steve Cover, the city’s Planning, Community and Economic Development director, approved minor technical changes to the project, including a screening on a penthouse meant to store mechanical equipment and adjustments to the building’s balconies. Although the renovation project was controversial before it received city approval and broke ground on construction day Nov. 15, Maniaci said she saw it like a normal project due to the small scale of the changes. “This has been a very thorough process,” she said. The renovation, which Maniaci said should be completed late in summer 2014, includes a new addition to the building, an outdoor stairway leading to the lakefront and the installation of a new coffee shop and restaurant. “I look forward to a successful project that will enhance the neighborhood,” Maniaci said.
Bob Lavingna HR design team leader Office of Human Resources
Grey Satterfield/cardinal file photo
Construction for the renovation of the Edgewater Hotel at 666 Wisconsin Ave. began in November and is expected to be completed late in summer 2014.
Madison Metro Transit expanded its low-income bus pass program Friday to provide 150 additional discounted passes each month. Metro Transit provides discounted bus passes for Madison residents who fall below 150 percent of the national poverty line, according to a release on the City of Madison website.
Prior to the expansion, Madison Metro Transit offered 300 low-income 31-day bus passes beginning on the 15th of each month. In late February, Madison’s Common Council approved additional funding to the program, allowing Metro Transit to provide an additional 150 discounted passes each month.
Ald. Larry Palm, District 15, said in the release demand for low income passes is high in Madison. “Transportation is important to our working families who are below the poverty line,” Palm said in the release. Low-income bus passes cost $27.50, compared to a regular 31-day bus pass, which costs $58.
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The group has sought legal advice on whether or not its request meets F50 requirements and, according to Ten Eyck, Ward’s argument is not valid. Ten Eyck said the group will know more after an upcoming meeting between SSFC Chair Ellie Bruecker and Ward next
week when Bruecker will present budgets for the 2013-’14 year in which SSFC voted to approve WISPIRG’s contract request a second time. “Our student leaders are prepared to stand up for the decision that they made,” Ten Eyck said. “Hopefully he’ll be convinced.”
Man attacked after telling assailants to leave his house on College Court A College Court resident was attacked by five males after kicking the group out of his apartment March 8, according to Madison Police Department spokesperson Joel DeSpain. The victim waited until Tuesday to report the crime because he was unable to provide police with a description of his assailants, according to a police report. The victim described his attackers as white, college-aged males. The attackers entered the front door of the victim’s apartment at approximately 11:30
ees, Lavigna said. “We are making sure the governance groups are represented, and we are directly communicating with them,” he said.
“Everyone is quite interested in what this new system is going to look like.”
Madison Metro Transit expands program offering monthly low-income bus passes
According to Ten Eyck, WISPIRG serves an important role in advocating for students, with professional staff playing a vital role in having institutional knowledge and connections.
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p.m. Friday, while the victim and a friend were playing loud music and hanging out, the report said. According to the report, the victim told the men to leave, prompting them to bang on the door and ask why they were kicked out. The victim told police he fought with one of the assailants outside before the other four attacked him, the report said. After the victim fell to the ground, the suspects kicked and hit him multiple times, resulting in a concussion.
Check out dailycardinal.com for complete coverage of the UW chancellor search.
According to Lavigna, the project team will continue to provide updates to the campus community and is constantly adding content to its website about the project. Lavigna said the system is a “big challenge” because it impacts many people, but his team is excited about the level of campus engagement and the opportunity to create a system “uniquely suited to the talent needs of a world class research institution.” Lavigna said the next key steps are receiving policy approval from the Board of Regents and the Joint Committee on Employment Relations, and ensuring a timely implementation. —Paige Villiard
Plaintiffs in redistricting case claim state deleted numerous documents Documents on state computers concerning state Republicans’ 2011 redistricting efforts were deleted before the hard drives were turned over to plaintiffs, who challenged the redistricting in an earlier court case, according to court documents filed Wednesday that the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel examined. Several state Democrats and the immigrants’ rights interest group Voces de la Frontera initially challenged Republicans’ redistricting efforts, arguing they were drawn to disenfranchise Latino voters in Milwaukee. The state legislature is required to redraw congressional maps every 10 years to accommodate changes in populations around the state. The process is usually highly contentious because it allows the majority
party to redraw state districts to give candidates from their party a better chance of winning in elections. The initial case resulted in a judgement against the state, but soon after the decision, the plaintiffs discovered the state had withheld at least 55 documents during the proceedings, according to the court records. A judge ordered the state to hand over the nine hard drives containing the documents soon after the discovery, but the plaintiffs recently found a number of the documents had been deleted. The plaintiffs filed the court papers Wednesday to investigate the deleted documents. The plaintiffs are currently working to recover some of the lost documents and identify who may be responsible for deleting them, according to the court records.
Weekend, March 15-17, 2013
Student musical is a ‘Voyage’ worth taking Theater Review “Space Voyace: The Musical Frontier” Written by Quinn Elmer and Nicholas Connors By Lanni Solochek The DAily Cardinal
Photo courtesy of drizzydrake.com
Drake, with his pop elements and sung hooks, is just one member of a new breed of hiphop artists that challange the styles established by classic artists.
The poisonous new generation of hip-hop By Zachary Pestine Guest columnist
“Hip Hop, started out in the park/We used to do it to avoid the narcs.” -Jay-Z — “I Do It for Hip Hop” Like it or not, embrace it or shun it, all art forms, all movements and all people evolve and devolve. That’s just the nature of things. Nothing gold can stay. While manifestations of adroit and traditional rap music still exist, aberrations from what now seems like classic hip hop are now the rule, not the exception. Hiphop is not dead, but that’s only because hip-hop doesn’t mean any single thing anymore. Hip-hop music did not begin with Tupac Shakur; its roots date back far before him. However, I view Tupac as the progenitor of modern rap music, an era beginning roughly with the dawn of the ‘90s. As Jay-Z clarifies in the epigraph above, hip-hop began as a cathartic pastime that engaged an underprivileged group of people and allowed them to express life’s difficulties by cleverly articulating those troubles through lyrics. Then Tupac came around and really brought the art form into the limelight. For roughly a decade and a half, the umbrella of good rap music had a somewhat clear nucleus and successfully straddled the line between mainstream success and staying true to poignant self-expression and complex rhyme schemes. During this time, artists like Jay-Z, Nas, The Notorious B.I.G., Eminem, Common, Outkast and Kanye West produced a sonorous picture of what rap music can be
when it’s at its best. These artists eloquently painted a picture of the goings-on around them and matched their lyrical prowess with intricate flows and beats that adeptly benefited the listening experience. Rap’s image today is markedly different from what it was even six years ago. I believe this point to be best emphasized by Drake’s Take Care , which I view as an amalgamation of bad rap, bad R&B, bad pop and bad house music, despite securing the award for Best Rap Album at this year’s Grammys. But that’s what’s poppin’ on the radio. Of course, the Grammys are not the end all be all encyclopedia of what constitutes good music. But what’s telling is that Take Care overtook Nas’ Life is Good and Lupe Fiasco’s Food and Liquor 2 to usurp the 2013 rap throne. Both of the latter albums constitute rap in the classical sense, whereas Drake’s album seems like a foreign genre to anything 2Pac would have conceived of producing. But here we see the evolutions and devolutions of modern hip hop. There is no longer one thing called rap music. The innovation and creativity of Kanye West is partly to blame for that. But the real culprit is the marketability of hip-hop culture to consumers who couldn’t care less about its roots or the intricacies and complexities of its many apexes. Again, this isn’t any single person’s fault, it’s just the nature of capitalism. But for every artist like Drake and B.o.B, who blur
the genre of rap by infusing it with pop-singing and musical instruments that are unorthodox in the rap realm and for every Chief Keef (who venally makes music for the lowest common denominator by glorifying gratuitous violence and emphasizing the best possible life as one entirely composed of promiscuous sex, hard drugs and improper grammar) there exist artists like Wale, J. Cole and Kendrick Lamar, who pull mainstream rap back into the realm of self-conscious lyricism and intellectualism. Artists like Macklemore, who blend radio beats and pop sounds with genuine emotion, heartfelt writing, political undertones and stimulating concepts further convolute the story. Whereas Chief Keef flawlessly emphasizes the devolution of rap, Macklemore’s panache is the perfect example of how rap has evolved. There is no such thing as rap anymore. There are songs whose essences have roots in rap. There are artists who embody what rap used to be. But rap has become so diverse, so dynamic that there can no longer be one umbrella term to define the musical manifestation of the hip hop movement. There are now only subgenres that emanate from the late parent movement. In many cases this is a tragedy. In many cases this is a blessing. But in any case, it is simply what it is. Do you think hip-hop’s getting better? Or do you really like Drake? Let Zachary know at email@example.com.
Snippets from the South by Southwest festival
Some of our Arts Desk writers have ventured from the cave that is The Daily Cardinal offices into the sunny and terrifying world of Austin Texas’ SXSW. Reviews, interviews, photos and all sorts of coverage will leak in as the days pass (we’ll also be doing a big blowout feature on tuesday), but in the meantime kick pack and enjoy a playlist of tunes culled from the staff’s thursday itinerary. On display today are DangeRuss & James Franco, Parenthetical Girls, Foxygen and Dessa. Courtesy of SxSW.com
“Space Voyage: The Musical Frontier” is a once in a lifetime experience. A satire on science fiction, this show captures some of the best moments in sci-fi history and turns them into hilarious jokes and commentary on pop culture. The show is presented by InterMission Theatre, a theatre started by sophomores Quinn Elmer and Nicholas Connors at the start of the 2012 fall semester. The two began writing “Space Voyage” when they were still in high school and finally committed to the project and their vision this year. With a Kickstarter account used to fund the production and the support of friends, family, and an 18-person volunteer cast the musical exploded into existence. Connors, a music composition major here at UW-Madison, produced and scored the music himself while working with Elmer to write the script. The hilarious result makes for a night of comedic gold. In the far future, Captain David Drake of the USS Derivative and his crew are on a dangerous job in deep space. Their mission: obtain three extremely dangerous weapons and return them to the Star Patrol base for safekeeping. Their enemy: Exrin Apix, an evil mastermind who plans to destroy Star Patrol and let evil run rampant in space. The crew: eight specialists and two interns with half a mind to destroy Captain Drake themselves after he launches the weapons off the deck of the ship. The captain and crew must retrieve the deadly weapons from all corners of space before Apix finds them and sets them off. As far as the musical side of the show goes, it is up to par with many other local theaters. While it is not filled with Broadway classics featuring fine-tuned harmonies and extravagant lyrics, it gets the story across, usually with a comedic twist. Many of the songs are fast-paced and include great belts and solos from the performers. The title track, “Life In Space” opens the show and sets the mood of both danger and also incredible excitement. One song that stood out was the token love ballad, “If I Tell You How I Feel,” a duet sung by two crew members who performed with emotion and energy in their
“Hangin’ With Da Dopeboys” —DangeRuss & James France Ripped from the “Spring Breakers” soundtrack, this absurd song features James Franco rapping over trap beats. Solid gold. “The Pornographer” —Parenthetical Girls Slinky and sexy (in the dirtiest sense), “The Pornographer” shows off Parenthetical Girls’ guitar muscle.
voices and movements. The captivating song falls in the middle of the first act between the wonderfully titled “The Super Space Drive Blows” and “Find Our Balls.” In the second act, Apix and his crew outline their lifestyle with “The Best Thing About Being Evil,” featuring tap dancing and trumpet tones reminiscent of “Young Frankenstein.” The show closes with a reprise of “Life In Space,” which includes the entire crew of Star Patrol. The cast of “Space Voyage” was surprisingly professional for a DIY venture. While only a few members of the cast have majors or minors in theater, all have had experience on the stage in the past. Creator Nick Connors played the hunky Captain David Drake, a play on Captain Kirk from “Star Trek.��� His pompous attitude and lack of morals made him an exciting lead. Nick’s voice lent to the character perfectly, with his ballad “Between the Lines” being vocally powerful. Even with technical issues at the start, Connors helped lead the cast into a great performance. Apix, portrayed by cowriter Quinn Elmer, also held his own in the evil role. While his vocals were not as prominent and strong as Connors’, his body language and enthusiasm as a character helped him reach the same caliber of performance. The loving pair of Tolland (Luke Thimmesch) and Palmer (Natalie Perry), who performed “If I Tell You How I Feel,” stole the musical, both taking strong leads in their characters and their music. Another personal favorite was Kate Mann’s Karla Millenium, Apix’s overly angry sidekick who yelled, screamed and tapped her way through the role, adding another comedic side to evil. The other crew members all added their own bit of spice to the mix, though not all had the same performance caliber as the other members. The show was extremely entertaining, but definitely had its ups and downs. The main concern of the performance is the length. Most full-length Broadway musicals run between two and three hours including intermission. “Space Voyage” was a little over three hours long, which drag on a bit by the end. There is a section when the songs slow a bit and the show lulls, as most shows tend to, but it takes a bit longer than it should to pick back up. “Space Voyage” is a fresh, entertaining and incredibly original. While the time is a bit of a downfall, the story is captivating and the music worthwhile. “Space Voyage” is playing at Bartell Theatre through March 16th. Tickets can be found online at http://www.intermissiontheatre.com.
“No Destruction” —Foxygen Sounding like a fuzzed out and lo-fi 21st century take on Dylan’s cryptic lyracism and Mick Jagger’s lazy toocool-for-school delivery, Foxygen are derivative but brilliant. “551” —Dessa With roots in the slam-poetry scene, Dessa might be the most artistic voice in hip-hop right now.
See how many people get this wrong... The Irish nickname for Patrick is “Paddy.” “Patty” is a woman’s name, so it’s never “St. Patty’s Day”! Weekend, March 15-17, 2013 • 5
Friday morning hangover
By Dylan Moriarty www.EatinCake.com
© Puzzles by Pappocom
By Nick Kryshak firstname.lastname@example.org
Solution, tips and computer program available at www.sudoku.com.
Fill in the grid so that every row, every column and every 3x3 box contains the digits 1 through 9.
By Melanie Shibley email@example.com
Today’s Crossword Puzzle
This week’s request
You should do a drawing of Adrian Peterson from the Minnesota VIkings hoisting the MVP trophy! — Anonymous
Steve Irwin riding a flying crocodile through a sky filled with rainbows and sparkles and cupcakes. — Haley H.
A laughing Buddha!
— Mohit G.
Draw Haley eating a pizza while riding a flying crocodile that is also made of pizza through a sky full of pepperonis. — Grey S.
Answer key available at www.dailycardinal.com
ON AN ACRE ACROSS 1 Shoemaker’s material 6 Compound found in perfume 11 Buck Rogers player Gerard 14 “You’ll get ___ kick out of this!” 15 Rental contract 16 Biology class topic 17 Decorative property border 19 Toward the stern 20 It’s just a number 21 Hither and ___ 22 Respectful title in India 23 “To sum up ...” 27 Craftsperson 29 Bygone French coin 30 Part of many musical notes 32 PC support person 33 California’s ___ Gatos 34 Email predecessor 36 Add more lubricant 39 Unnaturally pale 41 High-risk event for cowboys 43 Full of energy 44 Made cat calls? 46 Agents making busts 48 Word with “second” or “mile” 49 Very slim margin
51 Country singer McCann 52 67 1/2 degrees 53 Not just hungry 56 Sticks together 58 “Lord of the Rings” monster 59 Finish for “beds” or “cyan” 60 It’ll give you a fare deal 61 Diving cousin of a puffin 62 Certain hardy, fragrant pink flowers 68 Sweater letter? 69 Accustom to hardship (Var.) 70 Battery’s negative electrode 71 Make a goof 72 Spread around 73 It may run while you walk DOWN 1 Bonehead 2 Geller of the mind stuff 3 Common Market monogram 4 Capital of Senegal 5 Writer of sad poems 6 Mischievous fairy 7 Come to understand 8 Country singer Tucker 9 Accompany, as to a party
10 What a stamped hand may allow you to do 11 Aesop’s loafer 12 Prefix with “red” or “structure” 13 One-time mass communication medium? 18 Wobble 23 Sunni’s faith 24 Oater choker 25 Oater ambusher 26 Convicted crook 28 Finishes the cupcakes 31 Decoration of honor 35 Adapted to dry climates 37 Good-night girl of song 38 Ancient instruments 40 Calendar unit 42 Time-teller’s contraction 45 Halves 47 Arid 50 Colorful tunneler 53 Dry Italian table wine 54 More accurate 55 Voice a formal objection 57 Jet black 63 Would seem to be 64 Ply needle and thread 65 Roman sun god 66 Tokyo, to the shoguns 67 Wash. bigwig
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Weekend, March 15-17, 2013
view Cardinal View editorials represent The Daily Cardinal’s organizational opinion. Each editorial is crafted independent of news coverage.
More action needed against OWIs Wisconsin’s German heritage may explain where this perverse drinking culture began, but it cannot be the reason for such lax alcohol laws. There is nothing wrong with putting back a few cold ones after a long day, but did you know Wisconsin leads the nation in binge drinking (which is defined as having five drinks in a sitting for a man and four for a woman)? People in Wisconsin are more likely to drive drunk than anywhere else in the U.S., and this state has the highest incidence of drunken driving deaths in the U.S. Not only that, but minors can legally drink at bars if accompanied by their legal guardian.
plished by just administering fines and jail time. This board would also like to see harsher penalties for repeat offenders. Second-time offenders and so on should be at risk of increased jail time, license revocation and the installation of breathalyzers in their cars. These should all be considered minimum penalties for those with two or more offenses. We cannot allow drivers with repeat offenses back on the road in six months. Maybe they didn’t hurt anybody that time, but are you willing to bet your own life they won’t next time? Also, there shouldn’t be forgiveness for those who haven’t had an incident in the previous 10 years. As it currently stands, second offenders who haven’t been There is nothing wrong caught driving drunk in the past with putting back a few decade have a lesser penalty than cold ones after a long those who have been caught withday, but did you know in last 10 years. Why? Why is 10 Wisconsin leads the years an acceptable amount of time nation in binge drinking? for somebody to be forgiven for a drunken driving offense? These offenses should be permanent and This board—as a group of a second offense should be a secyoung college students—has ond offense. It’s that simple. nothing against drinking. We like Where it gets tricky are to party just as much as the next those people with many OWI person. However, when drunk offenses. When this is the case, people get behind the wheel of a it is not simply just another car it creates a dangerous envi- mistake. At this point, drinkronment for everyone. ing is a serious health probRecently, a set of bills was lem and needs to be addressed. put before the state Legislature This board would like to see that would essentially some focus on theracrack down on drunken peutic solutions to driving. Without going drinking. As stated into too much detail, earlier, the Wisconsin the general theme of drinking problem is a OWI the bills is to increase cultural issue. We canconvictions fines and make some not expect to fix the (within 5 offenses actual crimes problem by merely years) before depending on the numthrowing people in felony OWI ber of operating while jail. Sure, when it’s charges in Wis. intoxicated tickets your third OWI maybe received and the level a few months in jail of intoxication. will straighten you percent of While this is all very out, but when we are Wis. high commendable, this looking at eight, nine, schoolers board would like to see even 10 OWI offenses, reported more. Given the fact that jail is not the solution. binge drinking drinking is ingrained in Alcohol therapy is the in 2011. the Wisconsin culture, only real way we will it is important to prosee progress in changtect its citizens from ing the drinking culof the total production the consequences of ture in Wisconsin. of Korbel drunken driving. The While the new probrandy is first offense should not posals are in fact a step consumed in be just a slap on the in the right direction, Wisconsin. wrist. The new proposthere is still much to be als would require first done. Increasing fines offenders to appear in court, and jail time is not going to fix the which is great. This forces them problem Wisconsin faces. Taking to think about their actions and preventative measures like the consequences that could license revocation and installing have resulted. car breathalyzers will help keep Furthermore, we encourage offenders off the road, while therlegislators to consider adding apy and community involvement mandatory community service will keep people sober. and alcohol-related classes to The Daily Cardinal Editorial be taken by first offenders. Board consists of seven members The idea here is to reverse the and represents the views of the drinking culture in this state paper. Please send all feedback to and that cannot be accom- email@example.com.
Homeless population needs more advocates Mitch Taylor opinion columnist
fter a semester and a half of writing on local issues, I’ve noticed some recurring themes. One is protesters and the other, occurring almost as often, is protesters getting arrested. Friday of last week, six protesters were cuffed at City Hall for refusing to leave after hours. They were there with many other community members to voice their objections to a policy that limits the homeless to sixty days total per year in a shelter. I agree with these protesters that sixty days is far too few. While this sixty day limit doesn’t apply at some shelters during winter, the shelters are often overstuffed on the coldest nights. And some people are still spending the night outside. Winter in Wisconsin is cold. Basically, if I can’t walk a hundred feet outside without a hat, no one should be spending the night there. I’m sure the numb ears and fingers of every UW-Madison student agree with me. The human body is simply not meant to live outside in Wisconsin’s winters and I find it unacceptable that we as a society
allow it to happen when we have the means to do something about it. The solution is simple: better homeless shelters. Yes, it would be costly. I guarantee, however, that more government money is being spent on stupider and more useless things. Not to mention the money would be going toward saving potential lives. At this point, the fiscally responsible reader may be shaking his or her head. “Our society can’t afford to fully support the living of those who don’t contribute to it,” they may say. An understandable point, but it is too often forgotten what our society supposedly can afford. To name one example, the U.S. government spends more money on tanks that never get used than most of us will earn in our lives. There’s also bureaucracy, war, nuclear weapons, tax breaks for the rich, enforcement of drug laws and teaching children to write in cursive to name a few other things we pretend are more important than people. There is enough frivolous spending in government to house and feed every homeless person in the country. It’s simply not true that we can’t afford to take care of them. Madison’s homeless shelters simply don’t have the space or
means to support the number of homeless here. If this is the case, the solution is simple: better homeless shelters. The only reason homelessness is even allowed to exist in America is that the homeless are a voiceless minority. It’s so easy to marginalize people when they can’t do or say anything about it. It’s hard to admit to ourselves the people sitting out in the cold are humans like us, so we allow ourselves to ignore them so we don’t have to deal with the cognitive dissonance that comes from our desire to be good people while also not lifting a finger to help others. There are exactly zero members of government who directly represent the homeless population. They have absolutely no say in making the policies that affect them. I’m not suggesting we start putting the homeless in government offices, but it’s time we began taking more time to think about the needs of those to whom fortune was not as kind and who cannot speak for themselves. Apathy toward others is, in my opinion, the greatest problem in the world today. Please send all feedback to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Iranian and North Korean nuclear programs threatening zac pestine opinion columnist
ecause of the advanced nature of its nuclear weapons infrastructure, The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea is the western world’s public enemy number one at the moment. North Korea recently launched its third successful nuclear explosion. North Korea, a country that doesn’t shy away from unvarnished rhetoric, has repeatedly said the aim of its nuclear program is to have the capability to hit the continental United States. It has also threatened the Republic of Korea with what it calls “final destruction.” North Korea is unquestionably a terrorist state. However, it is not the single greatest state sponsor of terror. That ignominious title goes to Iran, a country which is also unvarnished with its rhetoric and the largest donor to the terror organizations Hamas and Hezbollah, as well as the best friend of Syrian President Bashar al-Assad, who has slaughtered close to 70,000 of his own people to date. While Iran is a bit more surreptitious with its nuclear program than is North Korea, hiding several of its nuclear plants underground where the International Atomic Energy Agency, the U.N. nuclear watchdog, is not permitted access to them, and insisting that its
nuclear goals are for civilian energy only, recent actions taken by Iranian executives can hardly be defended as peaceful. Last week, the father of Iran’s nuclear program, Mohsen FakhrizadehMahabadi, observed North Korea’s nuclear launching. This, coupled with the fact that Iran has told the world it will never shut down Fordow, one of its foremost facilities and a cache built inside of a mountain to protect it from air strikes, is cause for major concern. It may be true Iran’s nuclear goals are only aimed at civilian purposes, but those purposes are mass deaths of civilians of other countries. As previously stated, the Lebanese terrorist group Hezbollah is Iran’s proxy. This same group was just officially named as the source of a bus bombing that murdered six Israeli tourists in Bulgaria last June. This same group is scurrilous in its repeated calls to eradicate the State of Israel. Actually, Iran uses identical rhetoric. But make no mistake, Israel is not the big fish in the equation. The whopper is the U.S. Israel is the little Satan because it is the neighborhood foe. Israel is the enemy these groups have the capability of reaching. But with North Korea on its side, and Russian and Chinese money and support flowing into its pockets, Iran and its proxy Hezbollah will take all actions necessary to promulgate terrorism and threaten the well-being of the big Satan, the U.S.
President Obama, the U.N., and the EU have led unprecedented grueling sanctions against North Korea and Iran. While the North Korean and Iranian economies have taken turns for the worse, their quests for a full-blown nuclear arsenal have only proceeded to a crescendo. There are no signs either terrorist country will capitulate. If Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu gets to the point where he believes the existence of his country is in immediate danger, he will strike Iran. President Obama has ostensibly assuaged Prime Minister Netanyahu’s fears of that happening by assuring him that the U.S. is committed to preventing Iran from obtaining nuclear weapons at all costs. Containment is not an option. As average American citizens, we may think we are powerless. We are not. Each of us has a voice. In order to raise those voices, each of us must stay informed. The New York Times has extensive pages detailing each country’s nuclear program. CNN and the Wall Street Journal run articles almost every day regarding these menacing and portentous nations. In the coming months, President Obama and Secretary of State John Kerry will exhaust every last option to obviate use of military force. Let us sincerely hope those steps are effective. Please send all feedback to email@example.com.
playoffs from page 8 in the corners and our forecheck has been outstanding so I think if we can get pressure on them, rattle [McNeely] a little bit … If this place gets rocking and we score a couple goals early I think he might feel a little uncomfortable.” Head coach Mike Eaves, however, is a little more wary of the Bulldogs’ young talent. “After Christmas, they are not freshmen anymore,” he said. “We’ve had kids here that become big-time players after Christmas. They are good players, and a little puppy dog will bite you in the ankle as well as an older dog so we have to be
ready for that.” Duluth also has one of the most impressive power play units in the country. The Bulldogs are ranked No. 4 in the country, converting on 41-of-171 chances this season. Their 41 power play goals account for an incredible 42 percent of their total offensive production this season (41-of-97) “We have to stay out of the box, that’s the number one thing.” freshman forward Nic Kerdiles said. “If we take too many penalties, then we just get in trouble. First priority is to stay out of the box and just play our 5-on-5 game and go from there.” The last time the Badgers made it out of the first round
of the conference playoffs was in 2010 when they made it to the NCAA title game, but they have gained valuable playoff experience in their three-game series with Colorado College and Denver. “Veteran guys like [senior defenseman John] Ramage who have gone to the Frozen Four and other older guys like [junior forward Mark] Zengerle—all those guys can bring a little more,” Kerdiles said. “Hopefully we as freshman can learn from this and then we can also play our best game and help the team.” The puck drops at 7 p.m. at the Kohl Center Friday, Saturday and, if necessary, Sunday.
Weekend, March 15-17, 2013
Badgers look to continue hot start By Samuel Garigliano the daily cardinal
Wisconsin (18-3 overall) tries to continue its six-game win streak in the Louisville Classic starting this Friday, where will they take on four teams in three days. This tournament marks an important test for the Badgers, as they will face two ranked teams in No. 24 North Carolina (18-6) and No. 11 Louisville (21-3). The Louisville Tournament marks the second time this season the Badgers go up against multiple ranked opponents in one tournament, something of which head coach Yvette Healy and the team are well aware. “What we kept hearing from a lot of people was that we needed more signature wins, more wins against ranked teams, so everybody circled those games on the schedule,” Healy said. The task of defeating Louisville is made more significant by their renowned home record, which sits at 36-2 since the beginning of the 2011-’12 season. “I think everybody’s excited especially since you’re the underdog when you play Louisville at Louisville,” Healy said. “They’re always a tough team anywhere but when they’re at home they’re ridiculously good.” Wisconsin will also challenge two other formidable opponents this weekend, facing Ball State (11-9) and Eastern Michigan (8-8), who it plays twice. “Ball State [has] about five kids who were all region so have a really talented pool up and down their lineup that you’re going to have to pitch against,” Healy said. Senior pitcher Meghan McIntosh is looking to capitalize on the confidence she gained after throwing her first career no-hitter against Eastern
Kentucky last weekend. “I’ll bring the same confidence and same mindset going into this weekend,” McIntosh said. “We’re just going to go in 1-0 after our first game against North Carolina and get that win first.” McIntosh’s accomplishment is already the second no-hitter by the Badgers this season. Healy noted the impressiveness of the feat saying, “to have two different pitchers throw a no-hitter in the same season, I’ve never seen that before so I couldn’t be more proud of the team.”
“We’re just going to go 1-0 after our first game against North Carolina and get that win first.” Meghan McIntosh senior pitcher Wisconsin softball
Junior infielder Michelle Mueller had a spectacular tournament on the offensive side of the game, batting .615, and is concentrated on recreating her performance. “We’ll focus on the same things we continue to focus on,” Mueller said. “To make sure we’re seeing the ball and I’ll personally make sure I put the ball in play, and having that confidence that we are great team and that we can do great things.” Both Mueller and McIntosh won Big Ten Players of the Week for the tournament, making it the fifth time a Badger has received such honors this year, already a team record for the season. “Michelle did not make Allconference last year in the Big Ten and she put up some really good numbers so I’m happy for her especially,” Healy said. “And for Meghan as a senior its really nice tribute to her.”
weekend march 15-17, 2013 DailyCardinal.com
Badgers play host to Minnesota-Duluth in WCHA playoff opener By Matt Masterson The daily cardinal
abigail waldo/cardinal file photo
Junior guard Ben Brust will look to build upon his 14 point performance against Michigan earlier this season when the Badgers play the Wolverines in the Big Ten tournament.
Badgers prepare for rematch with Michigan 83-66 win. Wisconsin would have met Wisconsin arguably ben- the Nittany Lions if Michigan efited the most from the Big hadn’t blown a five-point lead Ten’s single-play cycling in the final minute of its showschedule this season, drawing down with Indiana Sunday, both Indiana and Michigan but the Wolverines’ loss gave only once during the regular UW the first-round bye. season slate. “I’ll definitely take advanWith Nebraska’s addition tage of [the first-round bye],” to the conference last sea- said sophomore guard Traevon son, everyone in the Big Ten Jackson. “That’s an extra day of matches up with seven league rest, an extra day of preparation opponents twice per season and getting shots up.” and plays the other four teams While Brust said UW will be one time. prepared for tip-off Friday, he also Wisconsin certainly made acknowledged Michigan could the most of their matchups with benefit from having a game under the Hoosiers and Wolverines. their belt at the United Center. The Wisconsin beat IU Wolverines could at Assembly Hall gain momentum or and knocked off develop fatigue from Michigan in what the extra 40 minutes was perhaps colof basketball. lege basketball’s “It could go best game this seaeither way, to be Points scored by Wisconsin in its son, with junior honest,” Brust previous meeting guard Ben Brust’s said. “You never with Michigan. half-court heave know, and that’s as time expired how it is in the sending the conseason—teams Average points per test into overtime. come off wins or game scored by Wisconsin went on come off losses, Michigan sophomore to edge Michigan, so you’ve got to be guard Trey Burke. 65-62, in the extra ready at all times five-minute frame. for anything.” The Badgers One would (12-6 Big Ten, 21-10 overall) think a significant portion will meet the Wolverines (12-6, of Wisconsin’s preparation, 26-6) once again Friday at the especially for Jackson, would United Center in Chicago for be spent focusing on Michigan a quarterfinal game in the Big sophomore guard Trey Burke, Ten tournament. who was named the Big Ten’s While UW earned a Player of the Year this week. first-round bye, Michigan Jackson, who grew up in had to defeat the Nittany Westerville, Ohio, and played Lions Thursday to set up a with Burke, said the conferrematch with the Badgers. The ence’s top player is especialWolverines held just a two- ly difficult to scout. Because point edge over No. 12-seeded of Burke’s ability to create Penn State at halftime, but opportunities for himself and they went on to cruise to a his teammates offensively,
By Vince Huth the daily cardinal
Jackson said it will take a joint defensive effort to slow him down.
“Teams come off wins or come off losses, so you’ve got to be ready at all times for anything.” Ben Brust junior guard Wisconsin men’s basketball
“He’s such a reactionary player. He doesn’t have too many weaknesses, so with him, you just have to get a hand up and hope the ball doesn’t go in,” Jackson said. “You can make him take tough shots, but he’s made so many tough shots already it’s just become natural to him.” Associate head coach Greg Gard said he was pleased with the way Wisconsin made Burke take tough shots when the Wolverines came to the Kohl Center last month. However, the Badgers allowed Burke to get into a rhythm in the second half of that contest. “[Burke] was able to get into the paint on us, so we’ll have to be better off ball screens,” Gard said. “Trey’s really done a great job of learning how to create on his own shot. You can guard him perfectly and he’ll still create separation and be able to get a shot off.” Tip-off for the WisconsinMichigan showdown Friday is set for 25 minutes after completion of the Illinois-Indiana matchup, which will start at 11 a.m. The winners of those two games will meet in the semifinal round Saturday.
After earning a win last weekend when it mattered the most, the No. 14 Wisconsin men’s hockey team will host MinnesotaDuluth in a best-of-three series at the Kohl Center this weekend. The Badgers (13-8-7 WCHA, 17-12-7 overall) defeated No. 8 St Cloud State—the top-seeded team in the WCHA—Saturday 3-2 to earn the No. 4 seed and home-ice advantage, as well as a chance to host the Bulldogs (1013-5, 14-17-5) in the first round of the conference playoffs. “It’s really nice, you don’t need to worry about sleeping in some hotel room,” sophomore defenseman Jake McCabe said of playing at home. “To be around these settings—it’s home for us— so its always an advantage. We hope all the fans come out and really pack this place and if that happens, this place should be a fun environment.” In the first round of the 2010’11 WCHA playoffs, UW took game one on the road against Colorado College, but dropped the next two to lose the series and ultimately have their season ended. That mirrored the following season when the Badgers also took game one in Denver before again dropping the final two games to lose the series. McCabe said that getting off to a good start in the season is key, but even that may not be enough. “A lot of us have been in this situation before in the past couple years and we’re not very happy with the result,” he said. “You can’t look at it as a threegame series, you have to take it one game at a time. From here on out we have to win out. That’s
our mindset; you have to win hockey games from here on out to keep playing.” Back in October, Wisconsin and Duluth faced off in their regular season series. Sophomore goaltender Joel Rumpel made 29 saves to lead the Badgers to a 2-0 victory in game one before the teams skated to a 2-2 tie in game two. Coming of an eight-game winless streak, the Bulldogs have put together four straight wins with series sweeps over Alabama-Huntsville and Nebraska-Omaha.
“A lot of us have been in this situation in the past couple years and we’re not very happy with the result.” Jake McCabe sophomore defenseman Wisconsin men’s hockey
Duluth is a team that has relied heavily on their young talent this season. Freshmen forwards Austin Farley and Tony Cameranesi lead the team with 34 points, and freshman goaltender Matt McNeely has earned a team-high 24 starts and 10 wins for Duluth. While the Bulldogs are carried by younger talent, the Badgers are a veteran team that is supported by their more experienced core of players. “I think [we can], especially the way we have been playing here the last couple months— hard nosed hockey,” McCabe said. “We’ve been playing hard
playoffs page 7
shoaib altaf/cardinal file photo
Freshman forward Nic Kerdiles and the Badgers will try to make it past the first round of the WCHA playoffs for the first time since 2010.