Pot-litically Incorrect
Scheduling like a Schmuck It seems like every time somebody mentions the ridiculousness of cannabis’ status as a Schedule I controlled substance they invariably follow it up with, “like heroin and LSD.” It’s pretty damn ridiculous that cannabis, a plant cultivated and used for industrial and medicinal purposes for literally thousands of years, is now considered by the consciousness police to be amongst the most addictive and dangerous substances known to man. Maybe they should use some of that civil forfeiture money to build a time machine and go back and warn Queen Victoria that the plant she was using to assist in her menstrual pain would invariably lead her down a path of addiction and mental degradation. The DEA warns, “Schedule I drugs are the most dangerous drugs of all the drug schedules with potentially severe psychological or physical dependence,” so clearly cannabis — with an extremely low rate of dependency and overblown if not outright false claims about its negative effect on mental health — doesn’t fit this category. Factor in the whole “no currently accepted medical use” caveat that directly contradicts the medical cannabis programs now in effect in a majority of states, as well as the position of the National Cancer Institute and any number of medical bodies, and it seems pretty undeniable that cannabis doesn’t belong in this category. But you know what else has no place in the Schedule I designation? Lots of things… like, really, a lot.
LSD As stated earlier, every time some reasonable media source mentions the scheduling of cannabis they follow it up with “like heroin and LSD.” But what needs to follow this is “… which is also stupidly categorized.” D-lysergic acid diethylamide, or ‘cid’ (as it’s known by really cool people), was added to the CSA during the ‘60s, a reaction to its widespread extrapharmaceutical use. Prior to its placement amongst the worst of the worst substances known to man, LSD was used to treat alcoholism. That’s right, LSD was once used to treat addiction issues, and its beneficial properties were even acknowledged by the founder of Alcoholics Anonymous, Bill Wilson. In the book “Distilled Spirits,” Wilson is quoted as having written, “I am certain that the LSD experience has helped me very much. I find myself with a heightened color perception and an appreciation of beauty almost destroyed by my years of depression… The sensation that the partition between ‘here’ and ‘there’ has become very thin is constantly with me.” So the founder of AA, who finds himself nearly powerless against addictive properties of alcohol, seems to think that LSD can help stir a spiritual awakening, which is itself an aspect of the AA program. A study published in 2012 in the Journal of Psychopharmacology analyzing studies carried out between 1966 and 1970 confirmed this application as well, finding that 59 percent of patients treated with LSD showed a reduced level of alcohol misuse. Additionally, LSD has been shown to ease the anxiety of those facing death due to serious illness, as illustrated by a study published in the Journal of Nervous and Mental Diseases titled “Safety and Efficacy of Lysergic Acid Diethylamide-Assisted Psychotherapy for Anxiety Associated With Life-
62 October 2015
by DJ Reetz
threatening Diseases.”
If LSD is shown to help alleviate addiction and has potentially beneficial applications for those facing the end of their life, it probably doesn’t belong in the section of the schedule designated for highly addictive substances that have no beneficial application. Sure, tripping balls can lead to some strange and possibly dangerous behaviors, but it seems like those stories we’ve all heard about parents returning home from a night out only to find that their LSD-laden babysitter has placed the turkey in the baby’s crib (and oh god, what’s that in the oven!?) may be slightly disingenuous. The point is, LSD doesn’t meet Schedule I criteria.
Psilocybin Another one of the most dangerous and potentially addictive substances known to man that occurs naturally just about fucking everywhere. Why, if I subscribed to the notions of intelligent design (and the DEA’s bullshit) I’d swear that god was trying to destroy us all by making the most harmful substances grow out of the ground. Fortunately, I subscribe to the principles of reason, which are pretty clear to the contrary on the topic of psilocybin. For those that don’t know, psilocybin is a psychoactive compound that occurs naturally in a variety of mushroom species. So if you do believe in the whole intelligent design thing, god made it for you, just as he did cannabis. These mushrooms have long been used for spiritual and shamanistic purposes, so the claim that psilocybin is likely to be abused isn’t really backed up by the overwhelming majority of history behind its use. A 2008 study also published in the Journal Psychopharmacology found that a majority of test subjects had meaningful spiritual experiences after oral consumption of psilocybin. From the study “Mystical-type Experiences Occasioned by Psilocybin Mediate the Attribution of Personal Meaning and Spiritual Significance 14 Months Later”: “At the 14-month follow-up, 58 percent and 67 percent, respectively, of volunteers rated the psilocybin-occasioned experience as being among the five most personally meaningful and among the five most spiritually significant experiences of their lives; 64 percent indicated that the experience increased well-being or life satisfaction; 58 percent met criteria for having had a ‘complete’ mystical experience.” If you’re the kind of hippie that believes that promoting spiritual well-being counts as a beneficial trait, then I guess that just leaves the addictive property of psilocybin as its reason for being Schedule I; because who doesn’t ceaselessly fiend for moments of profound spiritual insight? Well, according to Brown University, “Psilocybin does not produce compulsive drug-seeking behavior and addiction to hallucinogens is rare.” So ‘shrooms can help users find a meaningful place for their existence in the unfathomably infinite and unknowable expanse of reality, and they have little chance for creating dependency. I guess the DEA just likes diving into bullshit.