Tenerife weekly issue 114 by Tenerife Weekly

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Editor Marc Craig editor@tenerife-weekly.com Production Colm McCarroll design@tenerife-weekly.com

www.tenerife-weekly.com

The material contained within Tenerife Weekly may not to be reproduced unless permission has been received from the Owner. Disclaimer

CONTRIBUTORS John Sharples Sir Old Golfer Steve Andrews Barry Pugh Diane McGlone Colin Kirby English Time

The opinion of the owner or staff of Tenerife Weekly is not necessarily mirrored in the opinions or assertions made by any of our contributors.

Janet Anscombe

janetanscombe.com

Meryl Kew

(Red Queen Musings)

lagomera1.blogspot Adeje Blog

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While we strive to bring you a quality newspaper Tenerife Weekly cannot be held responsible for the print quality of this publication. The responsibility for print quality lies directly with our printers (TF Print, S.A.). Please be aware that by advertising in Tenerife Weekly you are agreeing to this disclaimer.

PUB QUIZ (Page 34) 1 Mowgli 2: The nine of diamonds 3: Tequila 4: Megalosaurus 5: The puffin 6: Pups 7: Zebra 8: The Victoria Line 9: BMW 10: -273 11: John Boyd Dunlop

SUDOKU Easy (Page 16)

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SALES

Issue 114

Miller Rental S.L C.I.F: B 38709366 Deposito Legal: TFE 447/2012

While Tenerife Weekly makes every realistic effort to inspect the contents of all of our advertising, it cannot be held responsible for any assertions or declarations they may make.

SUDOKU Challenging (Page 16)

Owner & Publisher - Christopher Miller

1. They Have Flights 2. They Have Balls 3. They Have Needles 4. They All Fly 5. They Have Necks 6. They Are Mounted 7. They Are Cracked 8. They Have “Tails” 9. They Are Driven 10. They Have Pits 11. Types Of Stops 12. Dogs 13. Ages In The History Of Man 14. Tests 15. Measured In Degrees

CRYPTIC CROSSWORD (Page 8)

COMMONYMS (Page 38)

QUICK CROSSWORD (Page 56)

Solutions to this week’s puzzles

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www.tenerife-weekly.com editorial Ahoy there readers!! I thought I’d begin in a Maritime fashion, due to the content of the front page! So, another Friday and the end of another month, tomorrow February is upon us bringing with it Valentines and Carnivals, among other things, should be quite a month! This last week has been quite an eventful one, we celebrated Burns Night in Vivo last Saturday (see page 10) which everyone seemed to thoroughly enjoy, we also put the finishing touches to our buffet area in Vivo, ready for the launch of our

Some Interesting Comments From One Of Our Burns Night Guests, Thanks Shirley! Hi Marc, As promised here are some of the photos from Saturday night. I hope they are helpful, as not my best work! Was not expecting you would need them for the paper. Next time I may have some warning, although my camera never leaves my hand normally. Anyway, was nice to meet you and I hope to be of help in the future as we are very much into photography.....ooh and eating out, which I notice you don’t really have a review of restaurants page?! I’ve always thought that even though paper’s really only give

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014 mid-week carvery… which means I’ll be typing away each day as the delicious smell of home cooked food wafts through the open window, I’ll be the world’s oldest Bisto kid! On a personal note our extended family of furballs increased again when my wife discovered a petrified puppy cowering under a van in our street. After trying to locate her owner through posters, Facebook, word of mouth and the dog refuges, we are happy to say we’ve now adopted “Bobble”! It’s heartbreaking just how many poor animals are abandoned daily over her e, so, as always please help the dog

good reviews due to restaurants advertising with them, that a surprise/secret review of the week would be great.....It gives readers an idea of what a new place might be like and opens the door for new clients that might like to advertise with you. For the real foodies out there it would be great info. My apologies if I’m being forward, it’s just that all the papers on this Island are starting look the same.......and it’s clear all they are doing is advertising without true content! Hope this email finds you well Kind Regards Shirley Woollett PS. I’m only going to say “weekly photography project” or photography club......that’s it no more!

shelters featured inside if you can. As always we have loads of points of view, recipes, home and garden tips, gossip, politics and entertainment news from our regular columnists inside to browse through at your leisure, as well as tons of news, events and stories from local to across the globe, from the serious to the downright silly! I really hope you enjoy reading it as much as we enjoy putting it together, any feedback would be most welcome! See you next week.

Marc Craig

CONTINUED fROM PAGE 1

Spanish Royals Visit Santa Cruz

he Spanish Royals were in Santa Cruz this week when Prince Felipe and Princess Letizia officially inaugurated the Palmetum (Botanical Gardens specialising in Palm trees)

by dianamcglone.com

The Palmetum, which was converted from a former landfill site, covers 12 hectares with its spectacular vegetation and has splendid views of the sea, the city and the mountains of Anaga. The project was started in 1995 with funding from the European Union and the city of Santa Cruz but was paralysed for lack of funding by the year 2000 and has never opened to the public. The best collection of palms in Europe are represented alongside streams, lakes and waterfalls. In his speech Prince Felipe said

the fact that “such beauty could flourish on an old landfill should be taken as example of overcoming the odds, as an example of how to address the difficulties that still hinder the development and welfare of so many people in Spain and particularly those in the Canary Islands.” ” The Princess and I would love to follow, and of course continue to support, the development and evolution of this park, we love to visit Tenerife and all the islands, to give encouragement to your future, which is our future too….” the prince went on. After delivering his inaugural speech the Prince of Asturias planted a palm of Jamaican origin, just one of 472 different species on display in the Palmetum. The Palmetum is located in Avda de la Constitución and is expected to open to the public shortly.

Historical Russian frigate in San Miguel

photo by Sir Old Golfer Photography by janetanscombe.com

He RuSSIAn replica frigate ” Shtandart ” has arrived at San Miguel marina, and

at 12 midday on Saturday 1st February it will launch a salvo

in honour of the town. Several local dignitaries will be present, and there will be guided tours of the ship. It will be in San Miguel marina until 14th February.

It was Tsar Peter the Great himself, who designed the frigate in 1703, and it was the flagship of his fleet , combining the dominant English and Dutch shipbuilding styles of the era. The Shtandart continued in service until 1719, when Peter decreed that the ship would be preserved forever as testimony

to its history and a monument to the art of shipbuilding. But in 1727, while the vessel was being restored, an accident shattered the Shtandart. Almost 300 years later, Peter’s vision was realised, and the ship was rebuilt as a floating museum. The whole project is described on the ship’s website.

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

NEWS ON THE ROCK As part of new bylaw regulations for rubbish disposal Arona Ayuntamiento is employing plain-clothes policemen to ensure the public in the municipality comply. The police will focus on areas known as blackspots, often in the borough’s tourist areas where establishments and residents pile rubbish up at bins which are already full, or throw it out during daylight hours. Environment councillor Antonio Sosa said that he was determined to ensure that thoughtless rubbish disposal did not give Arona a bad tourist image. He added that the same plain-clothes officers – the new brigadas de intervención rápida (rapid intervention brigade) – would also patrol during the evenings to control street traders, and dog owners who failed to clean up after their pets. Between eight and twelve police will be involved in monitoring “civil behaviour” in the areas, particularly, of Los Cristianos and Playa de las Américas. For years, tour operators and businesses have focussed on the value of the so called “pink pound”, attempting to attract the seemingly more affluent gay and lesbian sectors of society, whose perceived general lack of children often means more disposable income, one top choice for the gay traveller is seeing an incredible growth. Maspalomas in Gran Canaria resort of has shown a 10.3% increase in gay tourism in 2013, compared to 3.8% of non-gay visitors, according to the World Travel & Tourism Council and the World Tourism Organization. According to these sources, the gay community is now responsible for 10% of the volume of international tourists and just over 15% of global spending. A 33-year-old German motorcyclist is in hospital with serious chest and stomach injuries after his motorbike left the road near the Teleférico in the Teide caldera just before 3pm on Monday. After being treated at the scene by paramedics, he was collected by a Canarian health service helicopter and transferred to HUC where he remains in a serious condition. Tenerife Government, through Tenerife Tourism and its brand Tenerife Golf, have just launched the application in Golf in Tenerife-Tenerife Golf Guide, the most comprehensive guide to golf courses and hotel partners on the island created so far for Apple devices and Android. The guide is in English and can be downloaded free for iPhone and iPad at the Apple Store and Google Play for tablets and smartphones with Android system. Created by Tenerife company Tosal Creative Projects, it features a selection of member hotels of Tenerife Golf brand, a list that will be expanded gradually. Tenerife Golf Guide provides information on services that may be of interest to golfers, such as weather, transport companies and local golf stores. Each page of the guide provides contact details of all golf courses in Tenerife and La Gomera: their web and email, field map, game cards, image gallery and strategic advice on playing the most outstanding holes on each course. It also lets you connect directly to the golf course and hotel webs to make reservations plus it displays the GPS coordinates associated with Google Maps to make transfers easier to different courses and back to the hotel. The black economy in the Canary Islands is going from strength to strength, reaching almost 28% of GDP at the end of 2012, representing more than 11.2 billion euros hidden from the tax man. According to a recent report by the syndicate of financial and technical staff of the Ministry of finance (GESTHA), the rate of the Canarian black economy is more than three points above the national average, estimated at 24.6%, upwards of 253 billion euros. Obvious contributary causes are the collapse of the housing boom, the spectacular rise in unemployment, tax increases that were not accompanied by an efficient tax control and an increase of cases of political and corporate corruption.Add to that the social implication; in Spain there is a serious moral problem with paying taxes; comparisons of our level of fraud against the rest of Europe, where the culture of fraud is not as rooted, are striking.

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7 Stories – 7 Islands

by Red Queen’s Musings STORIeS is a project by Turismo de Canarias to rediscover the landscape and people of the seven Canary Islands through the eyes of seven young and high-profile filmmakers. each of the videos is only about 3 minutes long but gives a wonderful idea of the islands, their similarities and their differences.

Tenerife – The Edge of Earth by Matty Brown from Seattle, USA is a freelance director, cinematographer and editor who makes emotional and imaginative pieces, whether it is films/docs, music videos, commercials or museum installations and brings them to life in the most beautiful and ambitious way possible La Gomera – A volcano in the sea by Juan Rayos from Madrid, Spain. A filmmaker and photographer, who divides his activity as advertising director and director of independent documentaries and videos. He has worked for brands such as Adidas, Burn, Sony, McDonalds, Repsol, Reina Sofia Museum, Zara, Abengoa, and Royal Academy Spanish. The Lanzarote Effect – Lea Amiel and Nicolas Libersalle are a couple of French filmmakers. For several years they have worked as directors, camera operators and editors for TV and we are currently working on many different projects. Gran Canaria – Mirrorlapse by Rick Mereki from Melbourne, Australia. He shot to fame in 2011 after releasing

3 short films; MOVE, EAT and LEARN. The films were to be some of the fastest growing viral videos in Vimeo’s history. This video made me giddy. This is Fuerteventura by Andro Kajzer from Ljubljana, Slovenia El Hierro by Jean-Julien a French filmmaker who explores animation combined with live-action. His short films embrace both Chinese and French culture. They evoke existentialism, sensuality and sometimes absurd humour. These shorts have been awarded and screened in festivals around the world. He also worked on interactive films for Chinese, Arabian and Danish museums. He’s now in Seoul teaching animation in Kookmin University while developing new projects. La Palma – Frames of Life by Günther Gheeraert a freelance Film Director and Motion Designer based in Paris, France. Who can count: Nike, BrandAlley, Luminarc, Smirnoff, and L’Oréal, amongst his clients.

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HILARIOUS NEWSPAPER MISTAKES

eLL BY nOW you’ve probably all spotted my deliberate mistake last week; I did it to see if you were paying attention. If you didn’t see it, well, I’m not going to tell you where it was, am I? One thing I’m learning more and more as each week, and each issue goes by, is how easy it is to make a mistake, and how valuable proof reading is! Luckily we, hopefully catch most errors before they go to print, but, for your amusement (and to prove to the boss that I’m not the only one) here’s some mistakes, from simple spelling errors to mistaken identities to unfortunate picture/ad placings that must’ve had the editors reaching for the vodka!!

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014 Students... they eat the strangest things.

I’m sure she’s really a very nice girl.

Cilantro sounds way better than cement for a salsa recipe!

IT SAYS SUIT, SUIT!!

This British newspaper has given up on writing headlines entirely. Front page too!!

By Marc Craig

Misspells are common, but misspelling your own name? That’s what New Hampshire’s Valley News did!

Im not going to comment on this one, so don’t try and force me!

Who said Americans know nothing about soccer?

Ooooooooooh dear! Unfortunate advertising placement!

You’re just not even trying now, sack the proof reader!

Now, if I head down to Echo Arena, am I going to see the amazing US band that sing Mr Brightside or organised crime thugs?

And finally one of the most famous newspaper bungles in history.

Louis Union Station while returning by train from his home in Independence, Missouri, to Washington, D.C.] The Chicago Tribune, which had once referred to Truman as a “nincompoop”, was a famously Republicanleaning paper. In a retrospective article over half a century later about the newspaper’s most famous and embarrassing headline, the Tribune wrote that Truman “had as low an opinion of the Tribune as it did of him.” So, solid evidence that editors are in fact human, and will always make the odd mistake here and there…now, I’m off to get this proof read!

Erm, that’s comedienne Tina Fey on ‘SNL’, not an official Sarah Palin photograph.

Who needs the puzzle? This correction is a puzzle altogether.

I always thought there was something not quite right about Winnie The Pooh.

“Dewey Defeats Truman” was a famously incorrect banner headline on the front page of the Chicago Tribune on November 3, 1948, the day after incumbent United States President Harry S. Truman won an upset victory over Republican challenger and Governor of New York Thomas E. Dewey in the 1948 presidential election. The paper’s erroneous headline became notorious after a jubilant Truman was photographed holding a copy of the paper during a stop at St.

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

SELf DEfENCE AGAINST GENDER VIOLENCE

photos by Gerard Zenou

He FIRST course of female self defense (Krav maga-kapap) in the south of Tenerife, based specifically against gender violence, has been performed and successfully completed, by the

Master Moon Martin (General Manager Spain) and steve coster. Helping and contributing once again to society and public safety

of the capital. Krav Maga, literally Hebrew for â&#x20AC;&#x153;contact combatâ&#x20AC;? is a self-defense system developed for the military in Israel and Slovakia that consists of a wide combination of techniques sourced from boxing, savate, Muay Thai, Wing Chun, Judo, jiu-jitsu, wrestling, and grappling, along with realistic fight training. Krav Maga is known for its focus on real-world situations and extremely efficient and brutal counter-attacks.

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

vivo.11480 ACROSS

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CRYPTIC CROSSWORD

1. Ironman or woman (6) 4. South Australian lads love their greens (6) 9. Heard a vulgar curiosity built up in bank accounts (7,8) 10. Uncle, I destroyed the Atomic Centres (6) 11. Anaesthetise queen and editor- their days are limited! (8) 12. It is clear Gil has become hypersensitive (8)

DOWN 1. French capital real and verifiable (7) 2. Ethical advice from fable (5) 3. Out of the wind in front of circus arena smiling unpleasantly (7) 5. Have a shot at charm (7) 6. Formal contract in which nouns and verb correspond correctly (9) 7. Accused is not to be trusted (7) 8. We hear you should choose young Nicola to

Av Rafael Puig 7, Playa De Las Americas Arona ( In Front Of Hotel Tenerife Sol)

14. Written pact will indulge youth leader (6) 15. Reportedly carves vealers (6) 18. Cutest sheep wanders around in tricky trials (8) 21. Maintain animalsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; special domain (8) 22. Cleaning cloth rusted badly (6) 24. Foul talk? Scan clue - find nine dirt-free ones! (4-6,5) 25. Keyboard operator takes typical tourist to extremes (6) 26. News boss rioted wildly (6)

prepare outdoor meal (6) 13. Listen secretly in case parts of roof sag (9) 16. Gentle wind on the left where planes take off (7) 17. Roads confused setters (7) 18. Pieces of paper used to make the bed (6) 19. Persisted and came to the finish outside ancient city (7) 20. Using red lens makes you look slim (7) 23. One of Baden-Powellâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s boys sent out to reconnoitre? (5)

Answers to the CRYPTIC CROSSWORD are on page 2

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Lucky family Win Car!

n OVeRJOYeD client of Rev’s Motors discovered he was the lucky winner of a “Drive Away” car at the company’s 2nd Anniversary Party at The Treehouse, Chayofa.

On the day it was nice to see everybody together,

English, German, French, Norway, Italian, Latvian, Polish, no doubt a few others. Simon the owner of the The Tree House made a comment to Keith, that they have very nice clients at Revs Motors. Thank you Simon and all the staff, fab afternoon, and the food was yummy. After seeing the look on

PARA VIAJAR NO LONGER NEEDED

he government has modified the requirements for resident discounts so as to avoid “unnecessary procedures”. The measure is included in a law approved today by the cabinet. Government minister Ana Pastor said that from now on travel agents and

airlines will use the same telematic system (SARA), and will be required to do so. As a result, the public will find the process completed automatically and the Certificado de empadronamiento para Viajar will therefore no longer be necessary.

Just to be clear: anyone getting a discount must not only have a Certificado de

Registro but must also have registered with the council and be “on the padron”. It is just the requirement to get a travel certificate that is being waived. The travel agencies or airlines or ferries will be able to confirm the registration with local councils automatically. Please be aware that you have to renew your registration on the padron periodically: check with your local town hall how often this needs to be done.

S.H.E. Can Help THE FIRST DOMESTIC VIOLENCE DEATH OF 2014 TOOK PLACE THIS JANUARY.

He FInAnCIAL crisis has affected people in many ways and sadly tight finances and higher bills often result in tempers out of control and domestic violence escalating. The worst case scenario has happened with a death this January. If you or someone you know is in the midst of problems involving sexual abuse, help is at hand. The S.H.E. Helpline is there to put you in touch with someone who can give you the assistance you need. Do not suffer in silence. The S.H.E confidential helpline number is (0034) 690964145 If you need help from the Police or to make a report, ring the Multilingual Police central office, ask to speak to an English operator. The number is 902 102 112 Do not let

STARMUS RETURNS TO TENERIfE

Jannie’s face (Stuarts wife) when she realized Stuart Long Let Rentals Woodward had won the car, they have decided to give a car away for their 3rd Birthday. All invoices from 24th Oct 2013 till 24th Oct 2014 will be valid, as long as you are there on the day or someone is there representing you, Wendi and Keith. x

EMPADRONAMIENTO by janetanscombe.com

the language barrier keep you away from help. The S.H.E. HELPLINE is there to support.

Photo courtesy of Turismo de Tenerife

by janetanscombe.com

AST TIMe, there were legendary astronauts present – the late neil Armstrong himself attended among many others – and Starmus is back, this time with several nobel prize winners. This is glitterati and stars in more than one sense! This second Starmus festival, whose theme is the origin of the modern world, is promoted and directed by Garik Israelian, investigative astrophysicist at the Instituto de Astrofísica de Canarias (IAC), and backed by the Canarian Government and Tenerife Cabildo, and in collaboration with the

Abama Hotel.

Starmus 2014 will be held between 22 and 28 September, and delegates will enjoy talks, discussions, workshops, and even a night sky visit to Teide. The subjects will range beyond pure astronomy, however, and will cover science generally, and the arts, and all while those taking part enjoy enjoying the fabulous surroundings we have to offer here – not least the night sky! The festival isn’t cheap, and can cost a few thousand for attendees staying in luxury hotel accommodation, but day attendance prices start at �240 and so not ridiculously expensive for the seriously interested – astronomers say that Starmus 2011 was the most stunning and inspirational meeting they’d ever been to.

Bather missing off Playa de Benijo emergency teams have been out since Sunday, searching for a bather lost off Playa de Benijo, Taganana, on the north coast of Tenerife. Lifeboats, local and national police, and a search and rescue helicopter are all involved in looking for the missing man. The man is said to

be German, and he went missing around 5pm. The search, which continued at the time of going to print, is being carried out by sea, land and air teams, involving lifeboats, search and rescue helicopters, Policía Nacional, Guardia Civil, and Cruz Roja.

by janetanscombe.com

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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Burns Night

AST SATuRDAY was Burns night and down at Vivo, the cast of Decades got a bonus night off as the Masons and guests took over the venue to celebrate in true Scottish style!

For those of you who don’t know much about it, Burns supper is a celebration of the life and poetry of the poet Robert Burns, author of many Scots poems. The suppers are normally held on or near the poet’s birthday, 25th January, sometimes also known as Robert Burns Day (or Robbie Burns Day or Rabbie Burns Day) or Burns Night

(Scots: Burns Nicht), although they may in principle be held at any time of the year. Once the Piping of the haggis, in which everyone stands up as the cook brings out the haggis on a large dish to the sound of bagpipes,Our host for the evening, who I’m afraid to say I never caught the name of, did a wonderful job of reciting the “Address to the Haggis”. At the line His knife see rustic Labour dicht the speaker took a knife, and at the line An’ cut you up wi’ ready slicht, plunged it into the haggis and cut it open from end to end. The guests then toasted the haggis with Scotch whiskey then it was whisked back into the

kitchen to be prepared as the main course, while our guests enjoyed a bowl of Cullen skink, a thick Scottish soup made of smoked haddock, potatoes and onions. Everyone seemed to love the haggis, as almost every plate was cleaned off, then after a raffle, the live entertainment, namely yours truly began. The audience were a joy to perform for, up dancing to the very first song in an hours set, although Scottish songs are really my forte, 500 miles brought the house down. Thanks for a great nicht and hopefully see you next year, just save me some haggis this time!

Icod de los Vinos

Santiago del Teide

Plaza del Cristo, s/n, 38640 Plaza General Franco, s/n, Arona. 38300, La Orotava. Tel: 922 725 100 y 922 725 Tel: 922 324 444 - Fax 922 125 - Fax: 922 725 478 334 512

La Orotava

el Sauzal

Granadilla de Abona

el Tanque

Adeje

C/ Grande 1, 38670, Adeje. Plaza Luis de León Huertas, Tel: 922 756 200 - 922 710 1, 38440, Icod de los Vinos. Tel: 922 869 600 - Fax 922 120 - 922 710 420 869 643

Arona

C/ San Francisco, 14, 38600, Granadilla de Abona Tel: 922 759 953 y 922 759 902 - Fax 922 759 965

Guía de Isora

Puerto de la Cruz

C/ Santo Domingo, s/n, 38400, Puerto de la Cruz. Tel: 922 378 400 - Fax 922 375 253

el Rosario

C/ del Ayuntamiento, 4, 38680, Guía de Isora. Tel: 922 850 100 - Fax 922 850 354

Plaza del Ayuntamiento 1, 38290, El Rosario. Tel: 922 297 447 - Fax 922 548 280

Güímar

Ctra. de Los Abrigos 30, 38620, San Miguel de Abona. Tel: 922 700 000 y 922 700 001 - Fax 922 167 168

Plaza del Ayuntamiento, 4, 38500, Güímar. Tel: 922 526 100 y 922 526 101 - Fax 922 526 102

San Miguel de Abona

C/ la Placeta 10, 38436, Santiago del Teide. Tel: 922 863 127 y 922 863 150 - Fax 922 863 212 C/ La Constitución 3, 38360, El Sauzal. Tel: 922 570 000 y 922 570 24 - Fax 922 570 973 Avda. Príncipes de España 24, 38435, El Tanque. Tel: 922 136 715 y 922 136 623 - Fax 922 136 766

Local Markets Day

Location

Time

Plaza de San Marcos 1, 38280, Tegueste. Tel: 922 541 799 y 922 541 851 - Fax 922 540 903

Monday

Alcalá

9:00 am to 4:00 pm

Monday

Torviscas

7:00 pm to 10:00 pm

Tuesday

Los Abrigos

5:00 pm to 9:00 pm

Wednesday

Playa San Juan

9:00 am to 2:00 pm

Vilaflor

Thursday

Fañabé

9:00 am to 2:00 pm

Tegueste

C/ Doctor Pérez Cáceres 1, 38613, Vilaflor. Tel 922 709 002 - Fax 922 709 151

Friday

Golf del Sur

9:00 am to 2:00 pm

Friday

San Isidro

5:00 pm to 9:00 pm

Saturday

Fañabé

9:00 am to 2:00 pm

Saturday

El Médano

9:00 am to 2:00 pm

Sunday

Los Cristianos

9:00 am to 2:00 pm

Markets information numbers: 922 716 867 / 610 464 841

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Wert’s Presence At Cathedral Opening Sparks Riot

He Re-OPenInG of the La Laguna Cathedral after 12 years of renovations, was supposed to take top billing yesterday, however, the presence of the Spanish Minister for Culture, Jose Ignacio Wert, completely eclipsed the planned ceremonies.

While dignitaries were making speeches inside the cathedral, outside, about 3,000 chanting people called out the Minister’s name in a demonstration organised by unions and social groups to protest against the education reform act. National Police in riot gear took at

least four people into custody, and two others suffered minor injuries, while protesters chanted “Fewer police more education”, “a fascist government is the cause” “Resign Wert; the people do not support you” and “More schools and hospitals and less military spending”. Inside the cathedral Minister Wert received a somewhat warmer welcome from the Bishop of Tenerife, Bernardo Álvarez; in his speech the Bishop thanked the minister for attending before going on to review the history of the Cathedral. Then it was the turn of the minister, there were no screens or speakers for those outside to follow his speech, but

the protesters knew he had taken the floor and the noise increased exponentially, including the bangs of firecrackers, as some protesters surged against the barricade. Inside the Cathedral the ceremony carried on with the President of the Canarian Government, Paulino Rivero, who was the last speaker. Ignoring what was going on outside, Rivero chose to emphasize that it was a big day, not only for Catholics, but for all citizens because “the Cathedral is now once again an architectural jewel. La Laguna has had a great past and now has a bright future ahead.” he concluded.

by dianamcglone

Live Arico News Santiago del Teide

Get your doggie’s jabs up to date!!

eS, In collaboration with Hospivet Sur, Las Chafiras we are subsidising vaccination costs for the third time. Get your dog’s annual V7 and rabies jabs done for just 25 euros. We also offer the legal mini-

mum of microchip and rabies vaccination for the same price, 25 euros. No appointment necessary, just get yourself (and your pooch) to the clinic, just off the roundabout by Solbank. They open all day from 10am to 8pm, and quote “Live Arico” to get this knock down price. For the month of February only!!!

Animal Aid – Live Arico Supports Other Associations. This Friday the 31st January on the Top Square, San Blas, Golf del Sur, we will be raising money for the following animal welfare organisations :- Cats Welfare, Adepac refuge, SOS Peludos and MA-

DAT. All do sterling work and we are happy to assist with fund raising. DO come down, the line up is fantastic and includes Kerry Railton, Vici Denton, Cara as Cher, Micky Glamz, Darren Carr, Danny Bi-

nacho – Dog of the Week Found abandoned in Las Chafiras last summer, Nacho is still looking for his permanent home. He is around 18 months old, playful, sweet and is fully vaccinated and sterilised. He is medium sized, and our usual adoption fee of 110 euros includes all his injections and chip. Call Sue on 629 388102 for more information.

anco, Michaela as Tina Turner and Charlie Volare. All hosted by Suzy Q, with a finale by THE SPICE GIRLS......Dont ask. Just come and have a great night with us, from 8pm until we drop!!

PLeASe, if you have QUALITY unwanted clothes, CDs, DVDs, shoes, household items or childrens clothing, call Siobhan now on 630 857626. And do come and see us, we have shops in Los Cristianos, Calle Revron near Churchills Bar, and San Eugenio opposite Hotel La Nina by Amandas bar at las Carabelas complex. Both shops open from 10 – 4 Monday to Friday, and until 2pm Saturday. Kel even opens the Los Cristianos shop on Sundays.... Come and have a browse, bag a bargain and help the animals.

Charter Night

He LIOnS Club - Santiago del Teide are holding their Charter night this year at el Marques, Puerto Santiago on Saturday 22nd February. As in previous years the event will be a full sit down hot & cold buffet followed by cabaret & dancing till late. The evening starts at 7.30 pm for 8.00 pm sit down. Anyone that has experienced an el Marques Buffet will know what an amazing selection of food

they provide.

In addition to the superb entertainment, there will be our usual Euro note draw with great prizes donated by local businesses. This promises to be a great fun night & with the price of the tickets still held at 32.50 euros per person & including half a bottle of wine per person it is excellent value. There will be Happy Hour at the bar & Dress Code for the evening is Smart Casual. Tickets are available from El Marques Resales Office in Puerto de Santiago or call Steve on 666 362 092.

DATE CHANGE fOR VIVO TEA DANCE

VIVO will be holding their next Tea Dance of the season on tomorrow Saturday 1st and Sat 22nd February. This time, however, there is a twist! Professional dance teacher Beverley is offering 30 minutes tuition from 1pm, the first half hour is for people who have

not danced before, or have two left feet, so you can brush up your dance steps before the start, at 1.30pm. The organisers, Beverley and Carole were delighted to see some new faces last time, and look forward to seeing some more, as well as the regulars. Entrance costs just

5,00 Euros which includes refreshments and profits are shared between the Swallows official charity, Cancer Research and the Living Room, which offers support to local workers. Numbers are limited, so please contact Beverley on 636817265 or 922723392 for further details and future dates. See you there

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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THINGS TO DO IN fEBRUARY PART 1. by Red Queen’s Musings.wordpress.com

What to Expect February is one of our unpredictable months when the weather can change from perfect summer day to torrential rain all within a very short time. Average temperatures in the south of the island range from 21/22C during the day, with the odd occasions hitting high 20s to 15/16C at night so it is advisable if you are outside on an evening to carry a light jacket or cardigan. In the north the temperatures are lower, people living there light fires most days and average day time temperatures are between 14/17C and at night it is somewhere around 10 degrees. There are, however, still plenty of opportunities to spend days on the beach whether it is the golden sand of Las Vistas, the best natural black sand beach at Playa de La Arena that consistently re-

tains its Blue Flag award, or if you want a beach that’s off the beaten track, Playa Bollullo in Puerto de la Cruz can be reached after a challenging walk through banana plantations. Although there are no facilities it might be the hideaway you seek. February is also the month when Tenerife celebrates the Almond Blossom with walks and hikes through blossom routes and photography competitions. It has been declared of specific tourist interest by the Canarian Government. February Highlights 26 February to 9 March – Santa Cruz Carnival. One of the most highly anticipated events of the year Carnival takes place in Tenerife in February, although this year the majority of the highlights actually take place in March as the date is dependent on when Easter falls. Car-

nival is celebrated before Ash Wednesday, as the last chance for excess prior to the abstinence of Lent. Many towns across the island hold parties, with the best celebrations being held in Santa Cruz where something is going on almost every day. There are carnival queen elections, parades, street parties and plenty of opportunities for everyone to dress up. This years theme is Cartoons so get out that costume of your favourite character. 26th 21:30h. Gala Election of the Queen of Carnival 2014 International Centre for Trade Fairs and Congress Los Cristianos hosts one of the warmest and most colourful carnivals and although when this goes to press the theme has not been announced the dates are 21st to 31st March when the carnival takes to the streets with parades and

dances, among which the Carnival Parade through the streets of Los Cristianos to the beach and the next day, Sunday, Gran Coso Apoteósico (final event). Los Gigantes dedicate their Carnival to the theme of 1980s. The resort pays homage to the ’7 Magníficas’, founder of Carnival in the Los Gigantes in 1981. The Plaza hosts the costume contests, carnival groups performances, dances, parades and ‘burial of the sardine’ that puts an end to the party. Dates are 13th – 16th March. The theme for Puerto de la Cruz Carnival will be Wild West. Events for your diary are Gala Queen Election (February 27), the Opening Parade (1 March) Burial of the Sardine (5 March) Apotheosis of the Gran Coso Carnival (8 March), which puts an end to 10 days of parties, parades and an explosion of music and fun.

This week VIVO Decades is proud to announce the opening of our Mid-Week Carvery!

Due to the success of our Sunday Carvery, which is now into its 2nd year, we have decided to offer you a choice of delicious traditionally cooked meals, including our carvery as well as our “Dish of the Day” on Monday to Friday, maintaining the excellent quality of our Sunday Carvery, which has customers coming back week after week! From slow roasted meats to freshly cooked vegetables, delicious salads to beer battered fish and chips and mouth-watering desserts, there really is something for everyone! Prepared and cooked from scratch by our two fully trained chefs Barry Pugh and Argelia Placeres Gómez, at prices you won’t find anywhere else, and on Sundays, kids under 8 years of age eat ABSOLUTELY FREE, you’d be crazy to miss it! VIVO Carvery …..Incredible food, incredible value, incredible surroundings…. What are you waiting for?

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EVENTS ON THE ROCK Virgen de la Candelaria

janetanscombe.com Just a reminder that this Monday, 3 February, is a Tenerifewide public holiday in honour of the Virgen de la Candelaria. Many shops and businesses will be closed, as La Morenita (the Black Madonna) is the Canary Islands’ patron saint, and she has particular meaning for Tenerife because her apparition is said to have taken place in 1392 in Candelaria, where her basilica is now located . There is always a televised mass and procession in Candelaria itself, as well as in many towns throughout Tenerife, particularly in the north. There is also a tradition here of pilgrims walking from all over the island to Candelaria, and they are a regular sight walking in groups, even on the motorway, in the days leading up to the fiesta itself, though efforts have been made to stop this in recent years for the walkers’ own safety.

Was one of your new Year resolutions to learn Spanish?

Have you kept it yet? YOU may be interested to hear about Spanish courses organised by Adeje Town Hall together with the University of La Laguna. Graciela Dávila González, the tutor, is an experienced qualified teacher trained for teaching Spanish to foreigners and can guide you through the learning process in an easy way. Whether you are an absolute beginner, basic, an intermediate or advance learner, the teacher will introduce you to ways to immerse yourself in the language. Once you finish the course, you can get the certificate of the University of La Laguna. If you are interested in taking a course, please visit their website at www.adeje.es, click on “FORMACION, CURSOS DE IDIOMAS CAMPUS DE ADEJE”, or call into the offices at Adeje Cultural Centre, Pelinor Street, Adeje Town. Circolandia, a big-top spectacular for all the family janetanscombe.com An artistic journey full of music, rhythm and humour, that will transport the whole family into a magic world. That’s Circolandia, a, interactive spectacular show especially – but not only (!) – for children, and which will be performed for one night only in the Infanta Leonor auditorium in Los Cristianos on Friday 7 February at 8pm. Apart from clowns, attractions include the balloon man, magic, soap bubbles, and tightrope walker Sergio Rueda, finalist in Spanish TV’s Tu Si Que Vales, equivalent I’d say to the UK’s BGT. The big big-top finale will involve everyone on stage … and the public as well! A family show not to be missed, particularly since tickets cost just 5 euro. For more information call 010 (922 761 600 if outside the municipality of Arona).

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Moonshine

by Red Queen’s Musings enerife Weekly contributor and local blogger, Meryl Kew, has something to share that she’s very proud of.. and quite rightly so.

Many readers know that I am extremely proud of my young nephew Andrew Reddy who is an army photographer and the following show what he has been up to of late. Soldiers who fly and maintain the Apache attack helicopters have trained closer to home as they prepare to deploy to Afghanistan. 654 Squadron, 4 Regiment Army Air Corps has carried out the first live firing of the Apache’s 30mm cannon at Stanford Training Area in Norfolk, as well as practice arming and refueling the helicopter in the field. The unit, based at nearby Wattisham Flying Station, leave for a four month tour of Helmand Province in September. Previously, all live fire training has been carried out at Otterburn in Northumberland or Castlemartin in south west Wales.

PARAS TAKE THE SIGNALS MOTTO CERTA CITO WITH THE FOREIGN LEGION Colchester-based B Company, 2nd Battalion The Parachute Regiment (B Coy, 2 PARA) has been working alongside 2e Regiment Etranger de Parachutistes (2e REP) at their base on the rugged island of Corsica. Exercise BLUE LEGIONNAIRE has seen the two units fire each other’s weaponry and practise fighting together in urban areas. The 2 PARA soldiers earned French parachute wings by jumping with French Ensemble de Parachutage Individuel parachutes from a French C-160 Transall aircraft, while jumps from an RAF C-130 Hercules earned 2e REP soldiers their British wings. 2e REP has specialist mountain and amphibious troops who taught 2 PARA’s soldiers survival techniques and climbing on Corsica’s snow-capped mountains and, in the Mediteranean Sea, handling assault boats and attacking and defending beaches. The two-week long training was part of the Interim Combined Joint Expeditionary Force (i-CJEF) – an operational partnership

between the British 16 Air Assault Brigade and the French 11e Brigade Parachutiste, which stands at high readiness to deploy on contingency operations ranging from war fighting to disaster relief. Major Adam Wilson, Officer Commanding B Coy, said: “2 PARA and 2e REP maintain strong links as sister battalions. Exercise BLUE LEGIONNAIRE has been about us seeing 2e REP on their home turf and learning more about how they operate and live. It has been a huge success in developing the understanding, respect and trust between our two units, which could prove critical in future operations. “Corsica itself has been an excellent location that has allowed us to train in the air, on the land and in the sea. As airborne troops the sea and high mountains are not familiar environments to us, but it has been rewarding to challenge ourselves and learn new skills.” If you have enjoyed seeing how our boys and girls train you can see more at Moonshine Images For weather & news updates around south Tenerife check Queenies Daily Snippets

Las Galletas Marathon 2014

Inscription will open on Saturday, and runners can register in the Pabellón de Deportes (Los Cristianos), Guzmán Sport (La Laguna), or Mundi Sport (Puerto de la Cruz). There are 1,000 places, which will be allocated in strict order of inscription. The categories are:

photos by Andrew Reddy

Los Gigantes Carnival

Goes Back To The Eighties

He THeMe for this year’s Los Gigantes Carnival being held from the 13 to 17 March is “The eighties”.

The Carnival commission say the theme was chosen as a tribute to the founders of the first Los Gigantes Carnival held in 1981. Alejandrina Villar, Rosi Díaz, Olga Medina, Isaabella Issepato, Cochi Gorrín, Conchita del Busto and Loli Hernández (shown above) became known as the “Magnificent seven”, starting a tradition that today brings thousands of people into the small resort for the festivities.

by dianamcglone

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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POLE ALL OVER THE WORLD Your Chance To Break A World Record!

AST WeeK we broke the news about this exciting attempt at breaking a Guinness world record. Here’s a chance to find out all about it again and maybe get involved, plus a picture of some of the girls involved! Helen eastwood, Michelle Birks, Kate nicholson, Selina Bradley and Team leader, Stefania Roberto.

To celebrate the World Pole Sports Championships 2014 and promote Pole Sports across the world, the International Pole Sports Federation, IPSF, has invited Polericise Tenerife to take part in ´Pole 4 Life´ a World record breaking event on Saturday 22nd February 2014. The Aim is to do so whilst raising lots of money for well deserving charities and giving your studios the

opportunity to show your local communities what you are all about. There are also prizes up for grabs, including tickets to the WPSC 2014 and everyone who participates will be awarded a certificate. In 2006 KT Coates organised a charity event to create the first pole related Guinness World Record and raised over £50,000 for cancer charities across the globe. The record currently stands at 206 people, so who can imagine how much higher we could get the figure 8 years since the record was originally set?!? How it works: What we will need is to teach our participants a short, basic routine, Then on the 22nd February we will need to get two adjudicators (they must be people of standing with in the community such as a doctor, teacher or mayor) to supervise and witness us whilst we repeat the routine for

6 minutes. Our recording of the attempt will need to be sent to the IPSF, so that the World Record committee can decide if they will accept or decline each studio’s participation. There will be 6 of our girls taking part. We currently have over 70 Pole Studios across the world signed up for the event. We have chosen to raise money for various charities including, Macmillan cancer trust, Cancer research uk and World Child Cancer Charity. If anyone would like to get involved you can pop down on the day to witness the event, complimentary drinks will be available. Or you can make a donation on our JustGiving fundraising pages. https://www.justgiving.com/teams/PolercisePole4life Studio is situated in c/c Tropicana, Calle gran bretana, San eugenio. (opposite Jardin tropical hotel)

community administration Hestria is a professional company with more than 10 years' experience in conducting the administration of communities which are situated in the south of Tenerife. The staff of the company consists of 4 people, all speaking more than 1 language. Together we speak the following languages: Spanish, English, Dutch, French and German.

We know that transparency is very important. We therefore offer the owners in our communities complete access to the information of their community through our website. On the 24 hour office you can find the announcements of the General Meetings, the minutes, a monthly survey of the income and expenses of the community, see the state of your personal payments of the community fees, internal rules and/or the statutes, insurance policy, etc. In fact, anything you need to know as an owner.

The financial situation of the community has improved significantly since Hestria took over the administration of our complex, with a strong reduction of debtors.

Hestria is a professional company. They always respond immediately to any questions or issues that arise and they look at all viable options, keeping in mind price and quality.

They also publish the community accounts on their website, so nobody has to wonder how the community money is spent.

I would highly recommend Hestria to others!

Robert Hobbs, President Tagoro Park Costa del Silencio

Jim Halliday, President Villas del Duque Fañabe (Adeje)

For more info: www.hestria.es Hestria Administración de Fincas, S.L. Avda. Rafael Puig Llivina, 19 Centro Comercial City Center, local 23 38660 Playa de las Américas Tel: 922 795 613 Fax: 922 789 820 E-mail: info@hestria.es

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Accion Del Sol Weekly News

CCIOn Del Sol invites all children aged between 5 and 12 years to join us every Saturday starting the 1st of February from 13:00 to 15:00 at the refuge.

During these hours we will do Educational and Recreational activities. It is an opportunity for children to have fun while learning about animal and the natural environment of our Refuge. We will also include activities like learning to cook,

embroider, paint, dance, act, etc. and also how to train and care for pets among many other activities that will make for an entertaining and fun time for the children. Parents are welcome to join in or maybe they can use those hours to take a walk with our many dogs. Ongoing activities every Saturday will be published quarterly on our Facebook page “Aktion Tier Accion” So do not hesitate to contact us ,if you need more information, our phone number 922 77 86 30.

Here are three lucky dogs who are starting their new lives in Germany. Accion Del Sol are always looking for people to escort dogs on their flights to Germany. If you would like to help in anyway please do call the refuge on the above number. Here are the activities planned for the month of February, FeBRuARY 2014 01 Basic dog training: learn how to teach our dogs to sit, lie down, give paw, etc. We will also do some fun dog agility with them. 08 Preparation of Cakes: We’ll have fun preparing,

mixing, baking cakes and then decorating them. 15 Learn to Crochet and Knitting to decorate shirts, pants, bags, etc.. 22 Will be spend working with our Pony’s, learning how to groom, feed and care for them and the opportunity to ride them.

Accion del Sol last week seen its youngest future animal supporters visit the refuge, it was 40 3 year old children from a school in San Isidro who came to

learn about animal care and welfare. It was a mixture of many nationalities of children all coming together to help our many unfortunate dogs here in Tenerife.

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Gold Buying Shop Robbed At Gunpoint

OLICe are reporting a robbery in a gold buying shop (Compra Oro) in the La estrella area, just before Las Galletas. One of the attackers, wearing a motorbike helmet, entered the shop shortly after it opened and threatened the assistant, who was on her own, with a gun, though whether this was real or a fake is not known. The young woman

Opening times: Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday 14:00 – 17:00 Saturday 13.00 – 16.00 The Refuge will be closed

Wednesday, Sunday and on Holidays. Please call 922778630 for more information or if you would like to help out in anyway The refuge is situated at Poligono De Industrial Estate, Granadilla, Exit 51 on the TF1, directly next to ITER the Parque Eolica where the windmills are.

sensibly did not try to resist and handed over around 2,000 euros worth of jewellery and money. The thief then fled and joined an accomplice waiting outside on a motorbike before making a getaway. A search operation was mounted shortly afterwards but to date the thieves are still at large, and the Guardia Civil is continuing the investigation, helped no doubt by the images of the thief captured on the shop’s CCTV.

by janetanscombe.com

ADEJE COUNCIL CARRIES OUT IMPROVEMENTS TO ARMEÑIME SCHOOL The renovations won’t interfere with classes

T Please remember the new opening times of the refuge from the 1st of February are as follows

He ADeJe councillor for education, Andrés Pérez Ramos, announced that the council has begun a series of improvements to the primary school in Armeñime. He said “work will be ongoing throughout the year in different education centres in the borough to attend to any structural problems and carry out any renovations needed, and of course the main part of that

work will take place in August when the schools are closed and the work won’t be causing annoyance to students or teachers. However there are a few repairs that need to be carried out during term time that would be considered urgent and others that won’t interfere with classes, as in the case in Armeñime. Any work that is carried out by the council is also done at the re-

quest of the school directors or the parents associations and is for the benefit of the student body.”

Pérez Ramos added “the council understand that the needs of our educational centres, and as such any repairs and maintenance need to be attended to as soon as possible, as the students and professors who spend every day in these centres need an installation that is in proper condition for their studies and their convenience”. Basically the work consists of a series of maintenance repairs, including the removal of a garden zone in the reception

area of the Armeñime school which was causing damp, and replacing it with paving. Other repairs include the removal of the countertop and hand basin in the library which don’t serve any function and will allow more room for seats and other furniture for student’s use. The garden wall beside the courts will also be raised and repaired. Those employed to carry out these repairs in Armeñime are chosen and paid under a programme to improve and upgrade Costa Adeje and Armeñime, a joint council/regional government scheme.

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CHALLENGING Puzzle

EASY Puzzle

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

SuDOKu Every Sudoku has a unique solution that can be reached logically.

Enter numbers into the blank spaces so that each row, column and 3 x 3 box contains the numbers 1 to 9.

Answers to the SuDOKu are on page 2.

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

MAINLAND NEWS IN BRIEF Roshan Jamal Khan, now 56, who spent six years in Spain jails, returned home this week after his jail term was reduced with the government dropping charges of terrorism and planning to bomb metro trains in six countries. Khan and his family say they did not receive any cooperation from the Indian Embassy and that they are preparing to file a defamation suit and demand for compensation from the Spain government. Jamal, a St Xavier’s College graduate, went to Spain in January 2008 to look for options for Olive oil trade. On the night of January 17, he was picked up from Tarique Bin Ziyad mosque in Barcelona along with an Indian and 12 Pakistanis. Throughout Spain, the official emergency service responsible for managing rescues at sea, the Sociedad de Salvamento y Seguridad Marítima, who operate on behalf of the Ministerio de Fomento, coordinated the rescue, support or search for 13,090 people during 2013, an equivalent of 36 per day, as well as an additional 5,121 other maritime based activities, or 14 per day on average. In terms of the total number of vessels involved, in 2013 that figure reached 3,789 compared to 3,449 in 2012. The coastline alone, including the mainland and the Balearic and Canary Islands, is a huge distance of 7,880 kilometres. The overall operation is conducted as a public company, which has a team of more than 1,500 workers, on 24-hour alert, to respond to all emergencies that may arise at sea. They have 73 marine units, of different types, from salvage vessels to patrol boats. In addition, they have 11 helicopters equipped to carry out rescue work of human life and air reconnaissance, as well as 3 airplanes equipped to search specifically for shipwrecks and the detection of spills in the marine environment. Professors from the University CEU Cardenal Herrera studied 200 specimens of freshwater turtles from eleven Valencian wetland areas, to determine the prevalence of Salmonella and Campylobacter in these animals, because of their potential risk of transmitting gastrointestinal diseases to humans, especially children, 11% of the analyzed specimens of freshwater turtles were found positive for Salmonella. Campylobacteriosis and salmonellosis are common infections in humans: there have been 212,064 cases of the first and 99,020 cases of the second registered in the European Union during last year. Moreover, both are the two most frequent zoonosis worldwide, and thus represent an important public health problem in many countries which are interested in designing methods of preventing transmission of these infections from animals to humans. Salmonella can cause human gastroenteritis and meningitis, especially in children and elderly. Pope Francis has been asked to intervene in a decade-long dispute between the cardinal-archbishop of Madrid, Antonio Maria Rouco Varela, and the association ‘Santa Rita da Cascia’ over the ownership of 23 Flemish tapestries from the XVI and XVII centuries estimated to be worth over 2 million euros. Two Spanish courts have issued opposite rulings on the case but - while awaiting the Supreme Court ruling - the president of the association, Rosa Barranco, wants the pope to solve the matter and has collected 107,000 signatures in an online petition at www.change.org to this end. ‘’The church’s money must be used for charity,’’ said Barranco, openly accusing the cardinal of trying to get his hands on the tapestries to decorate the cathedral of Almudena. The priceless tapestries instead belong to the religious association founded in 1834 by Isabel II, which received them as a gift in 1869 from the noblewoman Victoriana Oliva in exchange for a pledge that they would be displayed for public viewing and that the revenue from tickets would go towards helping battered women. Last year more than 190,000 foreign residents left Spain because they couldn’t find work. Most of them, 105,774 were from non-EU countries, the previous year, only 15,229 foreign residents decided to leave the country. According to the National Institute of Statistics, there are currently 47,129,783 people in Spain, 0.29 per cent fewer than in 2011, of which 11.77 per cent are foreigners. Last year was the first since 1996, when data was first collected, that the population of Spain fell. According to the official census, the most numerous groups of foreigners in Spain are Romanians, Moroccans, British, Ecuadorians and Colombians. The only region where the population increased in 2012 was the Canary Islands, and the foreign population decreased in all regions except from Aragon.

The TW Political Showcase with Brian Harrison

AST WeeK, we began our countdown of the top 10 of the most famous corrupt, jailed or accused politicians in Spain, past and present. now, the big top 5!

nº 5 - María Dolores de Cospedal García (PP). Implicated in the Bárcenas case, the Secretary General of the PP emphatically denies any connection although Luis Bárcenas has testified against her. Just a while ago, she stated “Corruption is just a part of human nature”. Enough said. nº 4 - Francisco Javier Guerrero Benítez (PSOE), ex-director of Work and Social Security, Andalucía. Currently behind bars for his part in a decade long employment grant scam.

nº 3 - Francisco Enrique Camps Ortiz (PP), President of the Valencian regional administration 2003-2011, current member of the regional parliament.In March 2009, Camps was one of several PP figures accused by Judge Baltasar

Garzón of taking bribes in association with the ongoing Gürtel case. A few years later, the same judge was debarred for “unlawful” phone tapping of suspects. These phone taps went on to reveal over 40 million Euros of stolen public funds in Swiss bank accounts. Shortly after the departure of Garzón, Camps was found not guilty of fraud in an unrelated case. nº 2 – Luis “El Cabrón” Bárcenas (PP). The party’s accountant between 1990, treasurer as from 2008, ex-best buddy of Mariano Rajoy. Thanks to El País for publishing the famous handwritten “cash in envelopes” accounts, and judge Garzón for tracking down his 40 million Euro nest-egg in Switzerland via phone taps, Luis is currently in custody awaiting trial. It is alleged that these fundsare linked to the Gúrtel case, a sweet little number where public works contracts were awarded to overpriced contractors who would then pay cash to Bárcenas for distribution to key PP members, costing the Spanish taxpayers tens of billions of Euros over 13 years.

It’s Rat Tossin’ Time!

VeRY January, during the fiesta of San Pedro nolasco in the tiny Spanish town of el Puig, If you’re lucky, you get candy thrown at you, if you’re not lucky, you could end up with a dead rat in your face! Every year on the last Sunday in January, townsfolk serve up rice,

beans and turnips from steaming caldrons. Dancers whirl about in flowing dresses. Then the rats start flying The townsfolk have been slinging dead rats at each other on San Pedro’s day for about as long as anyone can remember although the custom’s origins are long lost, although “battle of the rats,” more than likely began after

nº 1 – Mariano Rajoy (PP). Now, you can’t just abandon your best buddy. Even if Luis Bárcenas was caught with his pants down and 40 million in a tax haven. In the space of a few months, Rajoy’s statements about Bárcenas changed from “I have known Luis for years, he is an honorable member of this party” to “he is a lying cheat, and the Spanish legal system will deal with him”. Not at all loyal, considering that Rajoy was one of the select PP members to have allegedly received regular cash payments from these fraudulently obtained funds.Just what we’d expect from the President of Spain who broke practically all his election vows within the first two years. Coincidentally, Rajoy’s handsome profile has been photographed with many others on this list. And we still haven’t forgotten that photo in 2009, of Mariano aboard the Moropa, a vessel owned by one of the most notorious narco-trafficking rings in Spain, whose leader is serving a 17 year sentence. Mariano Rajoy still evades questions about the incident.

the rat-borne plagues that ravaged Spain from the 14th through 17th centuries, or the Black Death would have claimed everyone who could have possibly continued the tradition! 18 year old Abel Flores said: “In El Puig, they say you aren’t a man until you pick up a rat during San Pedro Nolasco’s fiesta and heave it with all

your might,” Animal-rights activists’ have tried for years to get the practice banned, locals last year be to chant “Rats! Rats! We want rats But Mr. Montesinos says: “We can’t lose the very thing that makes us unique. Believe me, there’s nothing that can prepare you for getting hit by a flying rat,”

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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MERCADONA IS SPAIN’S LEADING SUPERMARKET

WOMAN KILLS BABY BOY

SWISS WOMAn who was taken into custody with her son in Torrevieja on the Mediterranean coast by police acting on an arrest warrant issued by Zurich authorities allegedly cut the boy’s throat with a hidden knife and killed him after receiving permission to give him a bath, Spain’s Civil Guard reported.

CCORDInG to the latest KAR (Key Audience Research) survey from leading market research company IPSOS, Mercadona is still the most valued retailer in Spain.

A massive 76% of respondents to the survey, which aims to measure behaviours, attitudes and opinions toward retailers, said that they would recommend shopping at the country’s largest supermarket chain Mercadona. Mercadona beat competition from El Corte Inglés, who were recommended by

71% of respondents, Carrefour (47%), Alcampo (39%), and Día with 30%. Mercadona rated highest in all of the questions asked in the KAR survey, most notably 82% of people said that the valued the quality of Mercadona’s produce and services, followed by Isidiro’s Alvarez company, El Corte

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Inglés. In another IPSOS survey released this week, the president of Mercadona, Juan Roig, was ranked alongside Banco Santander chairman Emilion Botin and the founder of Inditex Amancio Ortega as one of the three most influential businessmen in Spain.

Katharina Katit-Staheli, 40, was detained by Spanish authorities and taken to a hospital with her 10-monthold son, she had allegedly took her child suffering from a brain abnormality without authorization from a specialist Swiss clinic. A Civil Guard spokesman said in a statement that the mother and child were taken to the Spanish hospital because the boy needed medical attention. She asked permission from police to give him a bath, took a knife she had concealed in diapers and allegedly killed him. The woman then tried to kill herself but police prevented her from doing so, the statement said. KatitStaheli is in a serious condition at the hospital.

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Outrage Over Anorexic Doll

He nenuCO Won’t eat doll has been branded “deeply disturbing” by eating disorder campaigners in the uK . They believe the Spanishmade doll that refuses food could encourage anorexia among young children.

Idoya Revuelta, a spokesperson for the doll’s manufacturers Famosa , claims: “It’s been blown out of proportion. Children know perfectly well that is misbehaving when it refuses to eat. They learn to help and stimulate the baby so that it does finally eat its food.”

Wolves Return To Spain

ITH MORe than 2,000 specimens on the prowl in the wild, Spain is now an established wolf stronghold, leading to an increase in the number of attacks on farm animals. In the 19th century the european wolf was almost driven to extinction as hunters made a living from the bounties paid by villagers There is an estimated 250 breeding

groups and in the past two months alone around 100 cattle and sheep were killed in Butraigo, at the foot of the Guadarrama hills – Spain´s newest national park, about 60km from Madrid. Wolves are a protected species and most countries offer to compensate farmers for the animals they kill. But many are now being hunted illegally and poisoned. Farmers and shepherds invest in fences and fierce dogs to protect their animals. Officially, 130 wolves have been killed since 2005 in Spain, but the real numbers are unknown.

Wolf specialist Juan Carlos Blanco said: “Guadarrama can support two, even three, packs. We think there are now six packs within 100 km of Madrid. When they arrive in a new area the shepherds do not know what to do.Then they find ways to protect their flocks with dogs or fences. It’s a natural event and the wolf will not go away now. Maybe hunters will exterminate one pack, but others will take its place. Wolves are very flexible and resilient.” Wolves have been sighted within a few kilometers of major cities such as Berlin, Rome and Athens.

Brokeback Mountain Opera Opens

n JAnuARY 28 in Madrid, some six years after it was first commissioned, Brokeback Mountain, the Oscar-winning epic about the relationship between two cowboys in the American West, is coming to the stage as an opera. Brokeback Mountain is the tormented love story of two young cowboys, Jack and Ennis, who meet in the spectacular yet hostile mountainous region in Wyoming, the 2005 film starred Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal won three Oscars.

The opera and movieis based on the 1997 short story of the same name by Annie Proulx, composed in two acts over two hours, with dialogues in simple English with some swearing, Brokeback Mountain is scheduled to run at the Teatro Real until February 11. The opera’s 75-year-old American composer, Charles Wuorinen says: “The whole opera is about a typical kind of impossible situation, a tragic situation. In this case, it is two people who in some way want to have a relationship, which in their time is forbidden by society,” Wuorinen worked closely with Proulx,

whose original short story was published in The New Yorker before being transported to the screen by Taiwanese director Ang Lee. Gerard Mortier, director of the Teatro Real in Madrid where the opera will be showing said he deliberately scheduled Brokeback Mountain to open straight after the performances of Wagner’s opera of the adulterous love tragedy, Tristan und Isolde: “The importance of Annie Proulx’s novel is that great love is great love even if social reflections and conventions are opposed to it. Tristan, Isolde, Jack, Ennis; they all don’t understand what’s happening to them but

are all prepared to die for the love they feel,” Mortier said in a statement. Wuorinen, a New Yorker, has created 260 orchestral, choral, piano and percussion compositions, as well as of electronic music and ballets, denies creating Brokeback Mountain, in which the two heroes kiss on stage, as a message in favour of homosexual rights: “If that helps, that’s good. But I’m more interested in the fundamental human problem because I would not want the opera to be thought as an ideological or propaganda piece for a particular point of view,” he said.

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Special One Day Sale Event - 7th February

To celebrate our 9th Anniversary we are holding a One Day Sale with 20% discount on all items. Refreshments will be provided - so come along and help us celebrate in style!

Bamboo Towels & Sheets THeY are brand new to Tenerife; in fact, they are brand new to anywhere! You may not have heard of Bamboo towels or sheets before, but they are here and they are fabulous. Take an opportunity to discover the benefits of having bamboo bath towels. Picture yourself getting out of the bath or shower and wrapping yourself in pure heaven, in possibly the softest bath towel ever. Bamboo towels allow you to dry yourself off quickly due to their premium absorbent properties while also giving you the luxurious feeling of the softest fabric you have ever felt against your body. Imagine sleeping on pure heaven, now you can with the amazing Bamboo sheets that are now also available in a selection of different colours. Experience the ultimate in sleep comfort. Pure cotton can often feel a bit rough to the touch; not only will you find that the towels are exceptionally soft and absorbent, but you will also find that they are durable for everyday use. They are also perfect for people who want to maintain a hygienic environment, because they

are naturally odour resistant due to the fibres fast-drying characteristics. So say goodbye to that disgusting mildew smell you get from other towels from time to time, and bathe in serenity. Bamboo fabric is created from the bamboo pulp and is 100% biodegradable. It is also anti-bacterial and hypoallergenic; bamboo is naturally antibacterial and resists mould, mildew, fungi and dust mites. These properties remain intact, making it suitable for those with eczema, hyper-sensitive skin or hay fever caused by dust mite. Even better news is that bamboo fabric require less frequent washing, it needs no more than a 30Ë&#x161;C wash and dries in half the time of cotton. Tumble dry low and remove from dryer as soon as it stops to avoid unnecessary creasing. The only place that actually stocks these delicious items is Antiquities Tenerife in Las Chafiras. The have stock in three different colours, soft brown, grey and aubergine. Pop in and see them and feel the difference for yourself.

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POLICE INVESTIGATE SEX TRAffICKING USE Of GANG DISMANTLED GOOGLE A GLASS HuMAn trafficking gang responsible for transporting young nigerian women into prostitution in europe has been dismantled, following a joint investigation involving Home Office Immigration enforcement, Border Force and the Spanish national Police.

OLICe in Spain may soon be using Google Glass for police patrols.

At a presentation, the Director of the police, Ignacio Cosidó, said that he has been interested in research and operational advantages that bring the incorporation of Google Glass under the Strategic Plan of the Police Corps, intended to transform real smart security elements as part of a plan named “Policía 3.0”. It seems like something from a futuristic movie like “Minority Report”, but the technology is available today. Whereas some are worried about the security and privacy implications of glasses that can record your every move, the use for law enforcement, safety and protection is something

the Spanish authorities are keen to explore. In addition to being used by both regular and scientific investigating officers, the advanced eyewear would assist in recognition, recording and collating evidence in visual inspections, viewing live cameras and security monitors, video capture and facial recognition, as well as information about the location of other police units and support services. The glasses could also integrate with facial recognition systems, data verification and exchange with other patrols, access to police databases and management systems, vehicle checks, police records, and other supporting documentary evidence and procedural rules and protocols, among others.

RECYCLABLE SPECS MADE fROM CITRUS WASTE

GROuP of researchers from the technological centres AIDO, AIMPLAS and AInIA have been working for the past year in the development of a new plastic material that will make it possible to manufacture 100% biodegradable spectacles entirely from agro-food waste generated by the fruit and juice industry. The bioplastic material obtained, resulting from the fermenting process of citrus subproducts, will also be usable by other industries, such as the packaging and automotive sectors. The study forms part of the OPTOBIO project, which seeks to give use to all waste generated by the agro-food industry to reduce its impact and develop sustainable optical-ophthalmic products. During the first year of research, the techno-

The network used London’s Heathrow Airport as a transit hub to move the women, some of whom were under 18, to mainland Europe for the purposes of sexual exploitation. The British end of the investigation began in 2011 when Border Force officers at Heathrow intercepted a number of females in transit from Nigeria to mainland Europe. Immigration Enforcement staff based in Madrid liaised with the Spanish authorities providing intelligence linking some of the victims to a suspected group of traffickers operating in Spain. They identified 48 potential victims of the trafficking network. The Spanish leg of the investigation culminated in the arrests of seven alleged traffickers in the cities of Madrid and Lleida in September 2013. Two female victims were also

rescued. Because of legal restrictions in Spain details of the arrests there can only now be made public, but last year two men were convicted in the UK as a result of the investigation. In March 2013, following an investigation also involving Sussex Police, Odosa Usiobaifo from Enfield was jailed for 14 years for his role in the trafficking of 14 and 15-yearold Nigerian girls whom he put on flights to Spain from London. The following October David Osawaru, from Benin City, Nigeria, was jailed for nine years. He had been detained by Border Force at Heathrow in May 2012 as he chaperoned two Nigerian women in transit from Lagos to Prague. Clinton Nield, assistant director of Home Office Immigration Enforcement’s Risk and Liaison Overseas Network (RALON), said: “Thanks to our close co-operation

with the Spanish National Police and other law enforcement agencies in the UK and Europe we have successfully stopped a criminal network who actively targeted and manipulated vulnerable young women. “These women were given false promises and forced to travel to Europe where they were forced into prostitution. “Trafficking is an abhorrent crime and I hope this case sends a clear message to those involved overseas that international borders will not stop us from tracking you down and bringing you to justice.” James Brokenshire, Security Minister, said: “Modern slavery is a global problem and I welcome the news that thanks to the cooperation between the British and Spanish authorities this trafficking network has been stopped. “We are working closely with international law enforcement agencies to deter individuals falling prey to criminal gangs and disrupt slavery routes coming to the UK. “In addition to strengthening our response overseas, we are introducing a Modern Slavery Bill later this year which will send the strongest possible message to criminals, if you are involved in this appalling crime you will be arrested, you will be prosecuted and you will be locked up.”

NEW RAIL SAfETY MEASURES

logical centres have focused their efforts on optimising the process that makes it possible to obtain the polymeric material, the preparation and processing of the biomaterials and the optical optimisation. For the next (and last) year, the researchers aim to conclude all optimisation procedures and study the possibilities for the biomaterial’s application in other sectors.

IX MOnTHS After The Train Crash Which Killed 79 The Spanish Government Announces Safety Improvements

Spain is to install new safety measures on its high-speed rail system, and the Ministry of Development has backed the creation of an independent rail safety authority in the wake of the Santiago de Compostela crash that

killed 79 passengers and injured 100 others The Agencia Estatal de Seguridad Ferroviaria (State Railway Safety Agency) will be responsible for issuing operating licenses and safety certification, as well as developing a security policy framework and managing the Special Register of Railway Companies. The new body will have total access to information held by train operators and infrastructure

manager Adif, as well as the power to carry out neccessary inspections. The authority’s role will also involve developing an active dialogue with other safety bodies around Europe. .Public Works Minister Ana Pastor says video and audio recordings will be made inside train drivers’ cabins and speed controls will be rolled out across Spain’s railways. Train drivers will be forbidden from using mobile

phones while driving, she said. Recordings of their movements and conversations will only be made public as part of accident investigations, she added. In addition to automatic braking systems, trains will also be equipped with GPS systems to keep drivers informed about the maximum speed permitted in each section of track and warn if that limit is exceeded. The improvements will begin testing in March.

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Elizabeth Becomes Queen February 6th, 1952:

n THIS DAY in 1952, after a long illness, King George VI of Great Britain and northern Ireland died in his sleep at the royal estate at Sandringham. King George VI, the second son of King George V, ascended to the throne in 1936 after his older brother, King edward VIII, voluntarily abdicated to marry American divorcee Wallis Simpson. During World War II, George worked to rally the spirits of the British people by touring war zones, making a series of morale-boosting radio broadcasts for which he overcame a speech impediment, famously recreated in

the Oscar winning film “The Kings’ Speech” and shunning the safety of the countryside to remain with his wife in bomb-damaged Buckingham Palace. The king’s health deteriorated in 1949, but he continued to perform state duties until his death in 1952.

Princess Elizabeth, born on April 21, 1926, and known to her family as Lilibet, was the oldest of the king’s two daughters and next in line to succeed him, was in Kenya at the time of her father’s death; she was crowned Queen Elizabeth II on June 2, 1953, at age 27, the 40th British monarch since William the Conqueror On November 20, 1947, at London’s

Westminster Abbey she married a distant cousin, Philip Mountbatten. The first of Elizabeth’s four children, Prince Charles, was born in 1948 From the start of her reign, she was considered a modern royal, Elizabeth understood the value of public relations and allowed her 1953 coronation to be televised, despite objections from Prime Minister Winston Churchill and others who felt it would cheapen the ceremony., has worked hard at her royal duties and become a popular figure around the world. In 2012, she celebrated her Diamond Jubilee and 60 years on the throne The queen’s reign, however, has not been without controversy. She

was seen as cold and out-of-touch following the 1996 divorce of her son, Prince Charles, and Princess Diana, and again after Diana’s 1997 death in a car crash. Additionally, the role in modern times of the monarchy, which is largely ceremonial, has come into question as British taxpayers have complained about covering the royal family’s travel expenses and palace upkeep. Still, the royals are effective world ambassadors for Britain and a huge tourism draw. Today, the queen, an avid horsewoman and Corgi dog lover, is one of the world’s wealthiest women, with extensive real-estate holdings and art and jewelry collections.

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There Really Is A Groundhog Day

n 1993, the movie Groundhog Day starring Bill Murray popularized the usage of “groundhog day” to mean something that is repeated over and over. Today, tens of thousands of people converge on Gobbler’s Knob in Punxsutawney each February 2nd, to witness Punxsutawney Phil’s prediction. The Punxsutawney Groundhog Club hosts a three-day celebration featuring entertainment and activities. On February 2nd in 1887, the first ever Groundhog Day, featuring a rodent meteorologist, was celebrated for the first time at Gobbler’s Knob (yes, really) in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania. According to

tradition, if a groundhog comes out of its hole on this day and sees its shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter weather if there is no shadow, it means an early spring. Groundhog Day originates from the ancient Christian tradition of Candlemas Day, when clergy would bless and distribute candles needed for winter. The candles represented how long and cold the winter would be. Germans expanded on this concept by selecting an animal, in this case, the hedgehog, as a means of predicting weather. Once they came to America, German settlers in Pennsylvania continued the tradition, swapping hedgehogs for groundhogs, which were plentiful in the Keystone State. Groundhogs, also called woodchucks and whose scientific name is Marmota monax,

typically weigh 12 to 15 pounds and live six to eight years. They eat vegetables and fruits, whistle when they’re frightened or looking for a mate and can climb trees and swim. They go into hibernation in the late fall; during this time, their body temperatures drop significantly, their heartbeats slow from 80 to five beats per minute and they can lose 30 percent of their body fat. In February, male groundhogs emerge from their burrows to look for a mate (not to predict the weather) before going underground again. They come out of hibernation for good in March. In 1887, a newspaper editor belonging to a group of groundhog hunters from Punxsutawney called the Punxsutawney Groundhog Club declared that Phil, the Punxsutawney groundhog, was America’s only true weather-forecasting groundhog.

The line of groundhogs that have since been known as Phil might b e America’s m o s t f a m o u s groundhogs, b u t other towns across North America now have their ow n weather-predicting r o dents, from Birmingham Bill to Staten Island Chuck to Shubenacadie Sam in C a n a d a . . . . . Yo u know, I’ve got the strangest feeling that I’ve written this before....

STEPHEN HAWKING: “THERE ARE NO BLACK HOLES” and energy prisoner before eventually releasing them, albeit in a more garbled form.

n A PAPeR posted online titled “Information Preservation and Weather Forecasting for Black Holes”, the world famous physicist Stephen Hawking, one of the creators of modern black-hole theory, has dismissed the notion of an event horizon, the invisible boundary thought to shroud every black hole, beyond which nothing, not even light, can escape, for the much more benign “apparent horizon”, which only temporarily holds matter

Hawking says: “There is no escape from a black hole in classical theory, Quantum theory, however, enables energy and information to escape from a black hole.” However the physicist admits A full explanation of the process would require a theory that successfully merges gravity with the other fundamental forces of nature: “The correct treatment, remains a mystery.” Event horizons are mathematically simple consequences of Einstein’s general theory of relativity, researchers theorising what would happen to an astronaut unlucky enough to fall into a black hole assumed the astronaut would happily pass through the event horizon, unaware of his or her impending doom, before gradually being pulled inwards — stretched out along the way, like spaghetti — and eventually crushed at the ‘singularity’, the black hole’s hypothetical infinitely dense core Quantum theory however dic-

tates that the event horizon must actually be a transformed into a highly energetic region, or ‘firewall’, that would burn the astronaut to a crisp. .Now Hawking proposes a third option: Quantum mechanics and general relativity remain intact. But black holes simply do not have an event horizon to catch fire. The key to his claim is that quantum effects around the black hole cause spacetime to fluctuate too wildly for a sharp boundary surface to exist. An “apparent horizon”, would be a surface along which light rays attempting to rush away from the black hole’s core will be suspended. In general relativity, for an unchanging black hole, these two horizons are identical, because light trying to escape from inside a black hole can only reach as far as the event horizon and will be held there, as though stuck on a treadmill. However, the two horizons can, in principle, be distinguished. If more matter gets swallowed by the black hole, its event horizon will swell and grow larger than the apparent horizon. . “The absence of event horizons mean that there are no black holes — in the sense of regimes from

which light can’t escape to infinity,” Hawking writes. If Hawking is correct, there could even be no singularity at the core of the black hole. Instead, matter would be only temporarily held behind the apparent horizon, which would gradually move inwards due to the pull of the black hole, but would never quite crunch down to the centre. Information about this

matter would not destroyed, but would be highly scrambled so that, as it is released through Hawking radiation, it would be in a vastly different form and it would be almost impossible to work out what the swallowed objects once were. “It would be worse than trying to reconstruct a book that you burned from its ashes.”

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MARRY MY GAY DAUGHTER fOR £78M

BILLIOnAIRe property tycoon who offered £39million to any man who could persuade his gay daughter Gigi (who is in a nine-year civil partnership with Sean eav) to marry him, has now doubled the ‘marriage bounty’ to a staggering £78

million!!

The wealthy property developer’s offer of HK$500million made global headlines back in 2012, and he is now reportedly considering increasing his offer. Cecil Chao, chairman of Hong Kong property developer Cheuk Nang Holdings has a reputation for being a playboy, he is a fixture of Hong Kong high society and once claimed to have slept with 10,000

women. He made the original offer two years ago, attracting 20,000 potential suitors, including 1500 via Facebook. Malaysian publication The Edge claimed the 77-yearold tycoon ‘hinted this figure could be doubled if someone could capture her heart’, Chao has stated: ‘I don’t want to interfere with my daughter’s private life. I only hope for her to have a good marriage and

children as well as inherit my business,’ This latest attempt to entice a suitor has left his daughter’s civil partner Ms Eav ‘distraught’ Gigi married Ms Eav in a ceremony in France in 2012, though same-sex marriages are not recognised in Hong Kong. His daughter says she’s not upset that her father is attempting to pay any man who can woo her away from her lesbian partner, 33-year

Gigi, who is on ‘very loving terms’ with her father, said: ‘I don’t think my dad’s offering of any amount of money would be able to attract a man I would find attractive, I would be happy to befriend any man willing to donate huge amounts of money to my charity Faith in Love, provided they don’t mind that I already have a wife. Third and lastly, thank you daddy.’ Chao and his daughter

are said to have a close relationship, she has taken her father’s behaviour in her stride, and previously told a newspaper she believed it was an indication of how much he loved her. But she has repeatedly asked him to stop mentioning the financial reward to the press. British movie maker Sacha Baron Cohen is reportedly working on a film based on the story.

DAFT PUNK GET LUCKY AT GRAMMYS

T WAS a good night for robots and singer songwriters with the surname Williams as The robot-headed duo, Daft Punk won record of the year for the hit “Get Lucky” and album of the year for “Random Access Memories” at the 56th Annual Grammy Awards Sunday night. Daft Punk was typically silent, but singer-songwriter Paul Williams accepted the album of the year award with a generous speech. Williams, who’s written such songs as “We’ve Only Just Begun” and “Evergreen,”

had struggled to overcome substance abuse problems over the years. “Then I get sober and two robots asked me to make an album,” he said. Pharrell Williams, who sang on “Get Lucky,” accepted the award for record of the year. The typically silent duo also provided one of nights highlights, a performance of “Get Lucky” featuring Pharrell Williams, Stevie Wonder, Nile Rodgers and song originators Daft Punk, who lurked in a “control room” in their robot helmets. Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr, who received a Lifetime Achievement Award for their work with the Beatles,

both played. Starr did his “Photograph” with musicians including Peter Frampton and Kenny Aronoff, and McCartney did his new song “Queenie Eye” with a group that included Starr. Other performances included Katy Perry channelling Stevie Nicks and a Strappy leotard-clad Beyoncé who kicked off the show with a steamy rendition of her tune Drunk in Love, a chairgyrating sexy performance (she was eventually joined by her husband Jay Z) but was a questionable choice to open the show (8 p.m. still family hour!), leading to much online criticism from annoyed parents.

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Behind The Mask

BACKDRAFT!!

0 COWS locked in a shed in Rasdorf, Germany created so much methane gas that it caught fire and blew up!

You know you need to get help for your flatulence when your farts cause a barn to blow up. Police said in a statement: “The gas had built up inside the structure and was ignited when a static electric charge caused the gas to explode with flashes of flames.”

Luckily only one cow suffered minor injuries, but the barns roof was blown off by the flatulent Friesians Twitter user Mocking Bard wrote: ‘So a German cow actually started a fire with a fart. And then you ask why people worship cows.’ Jeremy Cowles added: ‘Cow farts are a serious health hazard.’ Rumours that the farm animals were fed on an experimental new livestock feed made from leftover baked beans and brussell sprouts have so far been unconfirmed.

HOTOGRAPHeR Andy Gotts has spent the past two years travelling the globe to capture more than 100 stars who have won or been nominated for a Bafta. But instead of made up faces and dazzling smiles these stark black and white

800 Students + 5000 Jägerbombs

=(And World Record A Lot Of Hangovers)

he controversial record was set at the Old Brewery Tavern in Canterbury, Kent when students drank almost 5,000 Jägerbombs in a night.

The crowd downed 930 litres (205 gallons) of the Jägermeister/Red Bull combo. It took 204 bottles of the herbal liqueur, 2,382 cans of Red Bull, 752,712 calories were consumed and the amount of red bull cans would stand 5 and a half times the height of Canterbury Cathedral if stacked on top of each other.. Just don’t ask any of the taverns customers to try and balance them!! The challenge took place at a weekly student event called Jäger Rocks, where the cocktail is sold for just £1. Organiser Student Republic

tweeted the results, posting: ‘News just in: you guys drank a record 4,764 Jägerbombs at last Thursday’s Jäger Rocks #cheeky.’ One psychology undergraduate said: ‘It’s always a mental night but it was better than ever – the Jäger just did not stop flowing.’ Another bragged: ‘It wouldn’t even be over 4,000 if it wasn’t for me and my mates.’ But not everyone thought it was clever or funny, one student criticised the event as ‘irresponsible’. She said: ‘At the time, I thought it was great – cheap drinks are always welcome to a poor student. But I ended up drinking so many, I had heart palpitations and I was sick. It was irresponsible, really.’ The event saw attendees

consume more than 14,200 units – an average of six Jägerbombs per person or 18 units each. The recommended weekly alcohol limit is 14 units for women and 21 units for men. Alcohol awareness charity Drinkaware warned against the ‘worrying trend’ of mixing spirits with energy drinks, which can cause palpitations, agitation, tremors, irritability and tension. Chief medical adviser Prof Paul Wallace said: ‘Caffeine can reduce the sedative effects of acute alcohol consumption, inducing a state referred to as “wide-awake drunk”. This can put people at risk of alcohol-related injuries because the stimulatory effect can lead them to underestimate alcohol’s impact on their mind and body, giving them a false sense of security.’

pictures show a very different side to celebrated actors and actresses. His free exhibition Behind The Mask features thespians such as Tilda Swinton, Al Pacino, John Hurt, Jeff Bridges, Robert de Niro and Sidney Poitier Mr Gotts said: ‘I have always been a movie buff and getting the oppor-

tunity to meet my matinée idols is beyond a dream come true, I specialise in character studies of the face and try to show a new and different side of world famous faces in my “warts and all”-style.’ Mr Gotts’ photographs will be projected on to the site of Bafta’s headquarters in Piccadilly on February 15 and 16 to coincide with this year’s

award ceremony. Curator at Bafta, Anna Allalouf said: ‘This is a show of historical importance as the first of its kind to document the many fine actors who have won or been nominated for a Bafta since 1954.’ The Behind The Mask exhibition is on at Somerset House in central London until February 7.

Stand To Attention!

CCORDInG to Government figures, nearly £6,000 worth of the anti-impotence pills Viagra, has been stolen from military reserves since 2007. The Ministry of Defence used the Viagra for conditions such as low blood pressure and altitude sickness. The figures were disclosed by the MoD in response to a written parliamentary question from Conservative MP Nick de Bois. The thefts were significantly greater between 2009 and 2010 with £2.5m

of equipment going missing, while just £816,906 worth of kit vanished between 2012 and 2013. They are among £7m of stolen stock, which also includes 100 bayonets, thousands of rounds of ammunition,(it’s unknown whether or not they were firing blanks), televisions, a karaoke rig an industrial washing machine, equipment from nuclear submarines, £7,000 of silver cutlery from Redford Cavalry and Infantry Barracks near Edinburgh and a £25,000 silver statue from the Household Cavalry barracks in Knightsbridge. Defence minister Dr Andrew Murrison said: “The Ministry of Defence

takes detecting and deterring fraud and theft seriously and set up a new counter fraud and loss department last year to improve the way fraud and theft is managed across defence. The focus of this new department’s work is to secure reduced losses caused by fraud, theft and loss, increased recovery through civil and internal procedures and the improved protection of assets through increased target hardening.” The figures were released following the case of Sergeant Major Steven Barratt, who was last week jailed for 20 months for trying to sell £115,000 of Army night vision kit on eBay.

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Paws for Thought

CL CHIneSe Theatre is the world famous cinema on the historic Hollywood Walk of Fame at 6925 Hollywood Boulevard in Hollywood, California. Originally Grauman’s Chinese Theatre and renamed Mann’s Chinese Theatre in 1973, the current name of

the theatre became official on January 2013 after TCL Corporation purchased the naming rights.

There are nearly 200 Hollywood celebrity handprints, footprints, and autographs in the concrete of the theatre’s forecourt. Variations of this honoured tradition are imprints of the eyeglasses of Harold Lloyd, the cigar of Groucho Marx, the magic wands of

Harry Potter stars Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson and Rupert Grint, the facial profile of John Barrymore (reflecting his nickname “The Great Profile”), the legs of Betty Grable, the fist of John Wayne, the knees of Al Jolson, the ice skating blades of Sonja Henie, and the noses of Jimmy Durante and Bob Hope. As well as human imprints, there are a few nonhuman ones too, most notably my favourite droids, C3P0 and

R2D2! Well now the non-human count has been added to by a 90 year old legend. MGM mascot Leo the Lion, has been immortalized with a paw print ceremony in the forecourt after a year-long global campaign to honour the studio’s legacy and film catalogue with the ceremony, attended by actor Sylvester Stallone and Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer (MGM) CEO Gary Barber, ‘bout time Leo!!

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entertainment

By Marc Craig

WHAT A MUG $1m 3 Movie

Deal for Wonder Woman

ell as if we needed any more confirmation- he’s proved it once and for all, Justin Beiber is a total drag- and I don’t mean artist! In the last few weeks he’s been caught spray painting his name on a wall, his homes been raided and now he’s been arrested for DUI and drag racing in a rented Lamborghini! What a tool! When will he realize that trying act like sugary pop’s baddest choirboy is NEVER going to make him cool, he’ll always be luckiest teen to ever post a video on YouTube. I still blame Usher- but who hasn’t sat browsing through YouTube whilst drunk? Anyway to celebrate.. I mean commiserate the silly little mop head’s incarceration, here’s his mug shot, along with some other naughty celebrities photographic mementos of they brush with the law, see if you guess them all!

sraeli model turned actress Gal Godot has signed up with Warner Bros for 3 movies at 330,000 dollars each, earning just short of a million dollars. Originally signed up to play Diana Prince.AKA Wonder Woman in the much publicized sequel to Man Of Steel, this news seems to confirm confirms that

Mandella:

long walk to freedom

Showing daily at 16:00 hr - 141 min Biography/Drama/History Rated 12A Starring

Idris Elba Naomie Harris Terry Pheto

Information Correct at time of going to press. Check our Facebook page or contact the cinema for further information.

Tel: 922 713 858

A chronicle of Nelson Mandela’s life journey from his childhood in a rural village through to his inauguration as the first democratically elected president of South Africa.

the the still untitled Batman vs Superman movie is a prelude to a justice league movie, but it seems likely that a standalone movie for the amazon goddess may come first. WB recently announced that the Batman vs Superman movie, starring new Kal El, Henry Cavill, and introducing Ben Affleck as an ageing Batman, has been pushed back

to a 2016 release, leading to Internet speculation that the production was troubled, this new information is surely a huge vote of confidence, it’s unlikely that the studio would confirm 2 other movies if the introductory movie wasn’t in great shape? So here’s a challenge.. The original JLA consisted of Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Flash, Green Lantern and Martian Manhunter... Who should play the other 3 roles? If you have an opinion email me at marc@tenerife-weekly.com

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Suitcase Goblin Spooks Cops

P JANUARY 2014 Friday 31st January . . . . . . . . . . . Bitter & Twisted Experience

fEBRUARY 2014 Saturday 1st February . . . . . . . . Saturday GALA Night Sunday 2nd February . . . . . . . . . ViVO Sunday Carvery Monday 3rd February . . . . . . . . . Decades Spectacular Thursday 6th February . . . . . . . Decades Spectacular Friday 7th February . . . . . . . . . . . Bitter & Twisted Experience

OLICe officers in the city of Bulawayo, apparently ran for their lives when a strange creature, described as a goblin, hopped out of a bloodfilled bottle. In what must be an early favourite for the most bizarre/ amusing story of the year involves a creepy goblin, which allegedly jumped out of a suitcase in the police station in Zimbabwe.

A family, who arrived at the station with a

traditional healer, claimed the goblin belonged to a tenant who was staying with them One police officer said: ‘We heard some screaming from the charge office and most officers who had knocked off rushed to see what was happening, at first everyone gathered around the suitcase, wanting to see what was inside. No one told anyone it was time to run. One minute, the charge office was full, the next, it was empty. I think some people went out through the windows because we could not all have fitted through the door. Fat cops and slim cops all ran for their lives screaming.’ The healer managed to overpower the goblin before burning it to death (apparently).

New Bra is Top Clasp!

Saturday 8th February . . . . . . . . Saturday GALA Night Sunday 9th February . . . . . . . . . ViVO Sunday Carvery Monday 10th February . . . . . . . . Decades Spectacular Thursday 13th February . . . . . . Decades Spectacular Friday 14th February . . . . . . . . . Valentine´s Night Saturday 15th February . . . . . . Saturday GALA Night Sunday 16th February . . . . . . . . . ViVO Sunday Carvery Monday 17th February . . . . . . . . Decades Spectacular Thursday 27th February . . . . . . Decades Spectacular Friday 28th February . . . . . . . . . Bitter & Twisted Experience

MARCH 2014 Saturday 1st March . . . . . . . . . . .Saturday GALA Night Sunday 2nd March . . . . . . . . . . . .ViVO Sunday Carvery Monday 3rd March. . . . . . . . . . . . .Decades Spectacular Thursday 6th March . . . . . . . . . . Decades Spectacular Friday 7th March . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Bitter & Twisted Experience Saturday 8th March . . . . . . . . . . .Saturday GALA Night Sunday 9th March . . . . . . . . . . . .ViVO Sunday Carvery Monday 10th March. . . . . . . . . . . .Decades Spectacular Thursday 13th March . . . . . . . . . Decades Spectacular Friday 14th March . . . . . . . . . . . . Bitter & Twisted Experience Saturday 15th March . . . . . . . . .Saturday GALA Night Sunday 16th March . . . . . . . . . . .ViVO Sunday Carvery Monday 17th March. . . . . . . . . . .St. Patrick´s Day Party (noon ´til 6) Monday 17th March . . . . . . . . . Decades Spectacular * Discount vouchers are not accepted for these dates

APAneSe lingerie maker Ravijour have created a bra that cannot be unhooked without true love. Well that’s what its makers claim, anyway.

The True Love Tester has a built-in sensor which monitors the wearer’s heartbeat, making sure the front clasp remains locked – unless genuine ‘excitement’ is detected, If it is, the bra will

automatically spring open: ‘When excited, the adrenal medulla [gland] secretes catecholamine, which affects the automatic nerve, and stimulates the heart rate. A sensor reads the woman’s heart rate and sends it to a special app via Bluetooth for analysis. The app then calculates the True Love Rate based on changes in the heart rate over time. When the True Love Rate exceeds a certain value, the bra hook is opened.’

The bra isn’t for sale but is being offered as the top prize of a competition held to celebrate Ravijour’s tenth anniversary, for those who spend ¥5,000 (£30) or more on its lingerie. “Loveless flings can never happen and unwanted gropers don’t stand a chance – as long as a lady is wearing TRUE LOVE TESTER” Erm.... one question, what if SHE wants to take it off herself?

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Sharples in Session By John Sharples

HELP HIM DON’T SCORN HIM

ustin Bieber, the self made rock star is in trouble with the police again. He appears, to many people, as though he is out of control. Many are joking about him and there is plenty of name calling going on. I personally feel that this “pop” boy wonder needs serious help. It won’t be easy for anyone who tries as most of the people around him depend on him for their livelyhoods. He doesn’t have to listen to anyone at all. At such a young age he has all the money he could ever need for the rest of his life. It looks likely that he will end up in prison for

drag racing in the streets of a residential area in the early hours of the morning with a friend. We have seen rock stars out of control before and a few of them are no longer with us. Many have died because of drug overdoses or have been killed in car crashes etc. One of the first things

he did when he had been charged was go on holiday to Panama and was seen racing around the beach on a giant quad bike. Whether you like his music or not, you have to recognise that the lad needs putting back onto the straight and narrow before he is committed to an early grave and eternal youth.

ABUSE CHARGES

1O THINGS YOU DON’T NEED TO KNOW 1 On a Canadian two-dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament building is an American flag. 2 Almonds are a member of the peach family. 3 Al Capone’s business card said he was a used furniture dealer. 4 The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket. 5 A polar bear’s skin is black. Its fur is not

KEEP RUNNING MISSY M issy the raccoon has escaped from her zoo enclosure. Her partner Rocky decided to stay where the food is easy to find but Missy has had her own Shawshank Redemption moment and dug a tunnel out of her enclosure at Tropiquaria in Somerset.

Good for her! I have visited zoos over the years and i love to see the animals but hearing of one making a

“Sat watching Mr. Balls statement on his plans to

do with anything? If it can be proved that they were abused in any way, the crime was still committed and somebody has to pay. Case in point is Stuart Hall who found that the evidence against him was so overwhelming that he decided to admit his guilt.

Whatever the reason is, for these people coming forward after such a long time, isn’t the issue. The issue is that we have laws and they should be adhered to. If someone has broken the law then they MUST pay.

break for freedom brings a happy smile to my face. It is just a shame that her partner didn’t have the guts to follow her. Raccoons can survive well in Britain and she is unlikely to find a mate so there shouldn’t be any dramatic change to the local wildlife. The owners of the zoo have said that she could

bite so don’t try to pick her up. They say that if she is spotted indoors, close the door on her and contact the authorities.

MR GRUMPY

y friend Mr. Grumpy, alias Dave Owen in Lancashire always comes up with a few lines that I agree with on facebook. Here is one of his offerings this week.

The recent clutch of trials of celebrities continue. They all seem to be on trial at once. Many people have said that they don’t understand how people could wait for thirty years before they did something about the alleged cases. What does this have to

white, but actually clear. 6 More people are killed by donkeys annually than are killed in plane crashes. 7 Shakespeare invented the words “assassination” and “bump.” 8 If you keep a goldfish in the dark room, it will eventually turn white. 9 The names of the continents all end with the same letter with which they start. 10 “I am.” is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

squeeze the rich. His followers reminded me of the Supreme People’s Assembly of North Korea, not the Fabian Society. All sat there applauding at the correct time not one dissenting voice, to an utterly cynical, and useless proposal to up the tax to 50p on high earners. I`ve always had a silly

thought that Balls reminders me of Mussolini, except that he, at least, got the trains to run on time. On his first day as Labour leader, in 1994, Tony Blair said that the party would not add to the middle-class tax burden. He pledged that the top rate of tax would stay at 40p, warning that primary school teachers, police officers and middle managers would be hit by any rise. Until, that is when Alistair Darling, just days before the General Election, raised it to 50p because he knew it would be awkward for the Tories. Labour MPs and union leaders hailed the initiative as a ‘populist vote-winner’ that could propel the party into power at next year’s General Election. So … not for economic reasons then !”

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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Leaked Documents Prove Aliens Are Here!

DWARD JOSePH Snowden is the American computer specialist, a former Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) employee, and former national Security Agency (nSA) contractor who disclosed top secret nSA documents to several media outlets, initiating the nSA leaks, which reveal operational details of a global surveillance apparatus run by the nSA and other members of the Five eyes alliance, along with numerous commercial and international partners. But if this story from the edward Snowden leaked documents affair has any truth

to it, the nSA eavesdropping on our phone calls could be the very least of our problems. According to a story posted by Iran’s Fars News Agency (who apparently have a tendency to tell tall tales), documents revealed by Snowden prove that the U.S. government has been under the control of a shadow government overseen by extraterrestrials who helped Nazi Germany’s rise in the 1930s. The documents give: “Incontrovertible proof that an alien/extraterrestrial intelligence agenda is driving U.S. domestic and international policy, and has been doing so since 1945.” Former Canadian defense minister Paul Hellyer who has publicly spoken about his belief in extraterrestrials, has allegedly confirmed the Fars story was totally accurate.

Question 1: What is the name of the child brought up by wolves in Rudyard Kipling’s The Jungle Book?

Question 2: Which playing card is known as “The Curse of Scotland”? Question 3: Which alcoholic drink is obtained from the agave plant? Question 4: What was the first dinosaur ever discovered? Question 5: Which bird is known as the “sea parrot” Question 6: What are baby seals called? Question 7: What animal did the Roman’s call the Horse-Tiger? Question 8: Which new London underground line was opened by the Queen in 1969?

Question 9: Who bought Britain’s Rover car company from British Aerospace in 1994?

Question 10: At what centigrade temperature is absolute zero? Question 11: With whom is the development of the first pneumatic tyre

associated?

Hellyer, 90, was Canada’s minister of defense during the 1960s. After his retirement, he became the first cabinet-level politician from a G8 country to go on the record claiming that extraterrestrials are already on Earth. In the past, Helyer has talked about Earth’s interaction with many extraterrestrials, including a race of “Tall Whites” that are allegedly mentioned in Snowden’s documents. When asked in an interview why he believes that aliens walk among us he said: “Because I know that they are. As a matter of fact, they’ve been visiting our planet for thousands of years. ... There’s just so much evidence, if anybody will take time off to do a little bit of research and study. Some people are interested and will take the time, and others just say, ‘Oh, you know it’s just fantasy.’

Since I’ve been public on this subject, I get probably three or four emails a week from all over the world, from people who’ve actually witnessed sightings, and some of them who’ve actually been on the ships, and some of them who’ve actually been transported to another planet. The latest reports that I’ve been getting from various sources are that there are about 80 different species (of aliens) and some of them look just like us and they could walk down the street and you wouldn’t know if you walked past one. They are what we call Nordic Blondes and also the Tall Whites who were actually working with the U.S. Air Force in Nevada. They’re able to get away with that -- they had a couple of their ladies dressed as nuns go into Las Vegas to shop and they weren’t detected.

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

home anD GarDeninG

Peppers

ePPeR plants offer a mix of tastes that vary from robust to sweet or super spicy. Harvesting your own peppers gives you that chance to get creative in the kitchen by adding to pizzas, soups, salads and even making your own salsa. They come in such a variety of colours from red, green, yellow, purple, orange, brown and even black. There are in fact hundreds of types of peppers and a super starter for you novice gardeners out there. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m going to show you how to save the seeds from your shop bought peppers and grow your own. There are two methods to process pepper seeds-dry and wet. The dry method is adequate for small amounts. Simply cut the bottom of the fruit and carefully reach in to strip the seeds surrounding the central

By linda Barratt

cone. In many cases the seeds need no further cleaning. To process seeds from large amounts of peppers, cut off the tops just under the stem, fill a blender with peppers and water then carefully blend until good seeds are separated and sink to the bottom. Pepper debris and immature seeds will float to the top where they can be rinsed away; or use this liquid mixture as a base for making soups. Spread the clean good seeds onto a paper towel and dry in a cool location. Both methods require the seeds to be left to dry (in a cool place) until they are dry enough to break when folded. Just be patient as the longer you leave the better the results. It will take approx two weeks to dry and anything up to six months to harden. Your seeds will then be ready to plant in your garden or if preferred pots. Did you know that you can even grow just one plant

from seed as most peppers have self pollinating flowers and therefore do not need another plant close by. Therefore you could even grow a pepper plant in your home if you unfortunately have no garden or balcony, providing that you have a warm sunny spot to place your plant whilst growing. Any type of growing soil can be used and seeds can also be placed straight into your

garden, pushing the seeds down roughly one inch below surface. The seeds do like a warm temperature but do not need much water...please do remember though that if too dry they will not grow. Once growing has properly begun your plant will need plenty of nourishment in the form of a liquid fertilizer. This is to give good growth and production without disease.

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Aquarius 20 January to 18 February

You could be in your element with a focus on your sign this week. This is an opportunity to get involved in deeply personal projects that have a creative and meaningful element. Plan ahead for ideas that contribute to your purpose and enhance the sense that you’re on target. Expect synchronicities and coincidences to play a big part in your life over the coming days. If you pay attention to these and your intuition, you may find you’re in the flow and doing great!

Pisces 19 February to 20 March

As the focus shifts to your spiritual zone, this is the time of year when it helps to slow down and take it easy. It’s a chance to rest on all levels and do more meditation or reflection as a way to get in touch with your feelings and deeper thoughts. Even taking half an hour a day for this could make a big difference further down the line. You’ll get a chance to prioritize your goals and spot potential mistakes before they happen.

Aries 21 March to 19 April

There’s a sociable vibe that you might enjoy. It might help you connect with new folks who could be helpful in the future. As Mars moves through your relationship sector, you may be eager to work on other people’s terms and consider their needs along with your own. Balance seems to be the key! Friday could be a lively day for love and general fun. However, a communication blip on Saturday could set you back unless you keep your options open.

Taurus 20 April to 20 May

You seem to be getting into the swing of things in your career, as this week’s lineup brings plenty of activity and opportunities to push ahead. Inspired ideas could come out of the blue, especially if you’ve been hoping to complete a goal or take the next step on your career path. You might make more progress with intuition rather than logic. Friday could be excellent for meetings or discussions that offer a new slant on an ongoing issue.

Gemini 21 May to 21 June

Creativity, inspiration, and curiosity might work together to bring some fascinating experiences your way in the days ahead. There’s a focus on expanding your horizons and generally moving outside your comfort zone that you might relish. This could involve travel, taking a class, publishing a book, or even teaching subjects you know a lot about. When you take a step into the unknown, you may find you can do more than you thought. It can give you the confidence to go even further.

Cancer 22 June to 22 July

Watch out for power struggles this week, especially in their initial stages. If you can discuss this or nip it in the bud now, you might be able to stave off a more complicated crisis. Issues associated with shared finances, birth, transformation, and personal secrets could be on your mind. You might have a chance to talk to a family member who can share something that might be a revelation. Understanding may bring a sense of relief and positive healing.

Leo 23 July to 22 August

Relationships seem to rock over the days ahead, with opportunities for a fun social life, new love, and mingling that can produce interesting results. Accept those personal or business invitations, as you never know where they may lead. A promising opening could come your way on Friday, when a discussion may lead to an idea and further involvement. However, if you’re feeling put upon at work, this might be good time to take a stand.

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British Police In Portugal For Maddie Suspects A SCOTLAnD Yard team has flown to the Algarve to liaise with local officers. British authorities sent a letter to Portuguese police requesting help with finding and interviewing three burglars who were in the area, and whose phones were “red hot” after Madeleine McCann went missing from her family’s Praia da Luz apartment in May 2007. Detective Chief Inspector Andy Redwood, who is leading the investigation for the Metropolitan Police and three colleagues held meetings with senior members of Portugal’s Policia Judiciaria to discuss the recently identified leads Crime Correspondent for Sky News, Martin Brunt said: “Four detectives from Scotland Yard arrived to meet their Portuguese colleagues - there’s a small team of Portuguese police working in the Algarve on behalf of Scotland Yard. We know that among those detectives from London is Chief Inspector Andy Redwood, who’s the officer in charge of the British end of the investigation into Madeleine’s disappearance. It’s certainly not the first time Scotland Yard detectives have visited Portugal - more than

a dozen times in the last two years since Scotland Yard have been reviewing and then investigating Madeleine’s disappearance has such a team gone to liaise. But it could be of some big significance because we know that earlier this month the UK authorities sent what’s known as an international letter of request to the Portuguese authorities seeking, we think, help in interviewing three potential suspects.” Although Portuguese authorities had closed the case more than 3 years ago, police reopened their investigation last year.

War For Ukraine?

Virgo 23 August to 22 September

You could be inspired to splurge on anything that can enhance your image and make you feel good. Investing in yourself might be one of the best things you can do, especially if it includes purchasing a gym membership or indulging in a few days at a local spa. A massage or beauty treatment could give you a tremendous boost. You might be examining your diet and exercise routine and pondering some positive changes. This is the time to do it!

Libra 23 September to 23 October

Your creative talents could peak this week, so bust out the art or craft materials or anything else that gets you in the mood to express yourself. Play music, dance, and have a ball! You might also be drawn to seeing more movies than usual, or opt for a real entertainment extravaganza. You might be in the mood for love, especially at the start of the weekend, when a romantic offer might be too good to pass up.

Scorpio 24 October to 21 November

You might feel like taking time out. With your home zone highlighted, this might mean relaxing and catching up with all that’s happened lately. Take your feelings seriously. Use this opportunity to release any undesirable incidents and move on. You might also be motivated to do some home projects or decorating to give your place a fresh look for 2014. Don’t rush to get back into socializing or your usual routines. You’ll benefit by meditating, reflecting, and taking life slowly.

Sagittarius 22 November to 21 December

As Mars continues to glide through your social sector, you may enjoy getting involved in community projects, teamwork, and being a part of things. There seems to be a real buzz in the air that you might find very stimulating. You may be doing a lot of communicating, connecting, keeping all the balls in the air, and loving it! There could be surprises and unexpected invitations that make things so worthwhile. Don’t doubt yourself on Saturday - you can do it!

Capricorn 22 December to 19 January

Thoughts about spending money, attracting money, and keeping the money you have could be very much on your mind this week. A focus on your personal financial zone suggests you may have some inspired ideas about how to earn extra cash. You might also be able to hunt down some fantastic bargains, particularly online. There’s a chance of a contract or job that could enhance your income, giving you even more to play with. Regarding relationships - be prepared to compromise!

eOnID KRAVCHuK, ukraine’s first post-independence president has warned the country is on the “brink of civil war”. At least five people have been killed and a number of government buildings across the country have been occupied. Hundreds of people remain on the streets of the capital, Kiev, the parliament is considering amnesty for protesters detained since demonstrations began, in the hope it wiilease the tension.

Kravchuk, who was president from 1991 to 1994, urged parliament to “act with the greatest responsibility” as it debates on an amnesty for detained protesters. Current President Viktor Yanukovych wants amnesty only if protesters leave official buildings and dismantling barricades. The protests began in November after Mr Yanukovych reversed a decision to sign a longawaited trade deal with the EU, instead fa-

vouring stronger ties with Russia. His decision to favour instead a £9bn bailout from Russia to bolster the ailing public finances angered many EU supporters in Ukraine. Kravchuk said: “All the world acknowledges and Ukraine acknowledges that the state is on the brink of civil war. It is a revolution. It is a dramatic situation in which we must act with the greatest responsibility,” he said in an emotional address that earned him a standing ovation. We need to ease the confrontation between the sides and agree a plan to solve the conflict. We need to work on this plan step by step to ease the confrontation.” .US President Obama, in his State of the Union address, said: “All people have the right to express themselves freely and peacefully, and have a say in their country’s future”. However Russia’s President Vladimir Putin has criticised what he called foreign “interference”, saying Ukrainians were “capable of solving this on their own”.

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37 parkle´s S y r r Ba

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

pUGh´S pantrY By Barry pugh

Bit On The Side

LUXURY RICE PUDDING Hellooo Sparklettes! O W K… SAT watching the Television the other night craving something sweet. RICe PuDDInG came to mind – but I could only make it with what I had lurking in my kitchen cupboards! Hence, I couldn’t use a normal recipe, so instead used some of the ingredients and techniques as inspiration. I had plenty of sliced almonds and a bag of raisins that I’ve been desperate to get rid of. I wasn’t disappointed after tasting it.. Also, to my dismay, I realized that I did not have cardamom like I thought I did. Instead I went with a blend of vanilla, cinnamon and nutmeg. Again, that’s

eLL THeRe are just so many celebs visiting our fair island lately it’s almost too easy to write this column !!!

more like an American style rice pudding but I’m trying to use only what I’ve got. I liked the technique of toasting the nuts, raisins and rice in the butter before adding the milk so I did that with mine. I also loved the idea of adding a bay

leaf so I threw one in there. It was good. I only had jasmine rice on hand so I used that for a little extra subtle flavour. YUM. I will always be using jasmine rice for rice pudding from now on.

Ingredients: 1 Tbsp. butter 25g sliced almonds 40g raisins

100g jasmine rice 900ml milk ½ tsp. cinnamon

¼ tsp. nutmeg ¼ tsp. vanilla extract

Method:

Sauté the almonds and raisins in butter over medium heat for one minute. Add the dry rice and sauté for 1-2 minutes more or until it looks slightly golden and toasted. Watch the heat carefully, if the butter or sugar from the raisins begins to burn take it off of the heat immediately. Add the milk, sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, vanilla and bay leaf to the pan. Using a whisk stir it well so there are no clumps.

1 whole bay leaf 50g white sugar

Bring the mixture to a boil over medium/high heat while stirring often with a whisk. As soon as it comes to a boil, reduce the heat to medium/low and let it continue to simmer until thickened (30-40 min). Stir often with a whisk to prevent caking and burning on the bottom. After 30-40 minutes the rice should be soft and the mixture should be thick and creamy. Serve hot or cold.

A couple of weeks ago I reported about how Corrie star Kym Marsh jumped on a plane to enjoy some sun, sea and well whatever other s’s you think she got up to, as a way of forgetting about her split from her man. This week

Slash star and TOWIE member Gemma Collins is doing the same. Several UK mags have featured tweeted images of her and TOWIE pal Harry Derbidge soaking up the sun, saying that they are “thought to be in Tenerife”. Well that’s just a bit sloppy, as I. Can confirm that they are indeed here on an 11 day getaway and arrived in Sunday! Come on UK press (mentioning no names) try and get things right... OK ???

Gemma recently split with her man Rami Hawash only weeks after their Christmas Day engagement announcement, he proposed by hiding his ring ( ooer ) in her Christmas pudding... Now I know what you’re thinking... How did he know she was going to have pudding ??? Anyway, you go Gemma... At least you can wash that man right out of your hair when you get back to Splash !!!

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Commonyms

Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a commonym you ask?

A commonyms is group of words that have a common trait in the three words/items listed. For example: the words; A car - A tree - An elephant.. they all have trunks. These will make you think! 1. An Airline - A Dart - A Stairwell ________________________________________ 2. A foot - Cinderella Fairytale - A Christmas Tree _________________________ 3. A Compass - A Doctor - An Evergreen __________________________________ 4. Time - A Kite - A Flag _________________________________________________ 5. A Bottle - A River - A Guitar ___________________________________________ 6. Deer Antlers - A Horse - An Attack ____________________________________ 7. A Whip - A Joke - A Safe ______________________________________________ 8. A Dog - A Kite - A Storyteller ____________________________________________________________ 9. A Golf Ball - A Nail - A Car _______________________________________________________________ 10. A Peach - A Long Jump - A Pole Vault ___________________________________________________ 11. Short - Bus - Rest _____________________________________________________________________ 12. Hound - Bull - Sheep ___________________________________________________________________ 13. Iron - Bronze - Stone __________________________________________________________________ 14. Blood - IQ - Ink Blot ___________________________________________________________________ 15. Burns - Angles - Temperatures _________________________________________________________

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Issue 114 - PuZZLeS Page 8. Page 16. Page 34. Page 56.

Cryptic Crossword Sudoku Pub Quiz Quick Crossword

Answers to the COMMONYMS are on page 2.

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

motorinG neWS

By lingy

Big Brother Is Watching Your Car

F YOu OWn or drive a car in the uK, the government has almost 500 archived pictures of it, and that archive grows by 26 MILLIOn pictures every day. Pictures taken by Automatic Number Plate Recognition cameras are used to fight crime, the government has a database of 17 billion images from a network of 8,000 cameras, so extensive that it allows police forces to track where vehicles have gone every single day. The cameras discreetly photograph cars on Britain’s roads every day, and are stored for up to two years. Pictures can be checked against the Police National Computer and used by the Driver and Vehicle Licensing Agency in the battle against crime and by 2018, up to 75 million pictures of vehicles will be taken every day. As well as fixed cameras, police forces use mobile units

- with more than 100 in London alone. The first cameras were installed in Britain on the M1 in 1984 to spot stolen vehicles. By 2005, the number of cameras had increased to 2,000 and there are now more than 8,000. Privacy campaigners have voiced concerns about the vast database of images which is thought to be the biggest of its kind in the world. Director of Big Brother Watch, Nick Pickles,says: ‘ANPR is a classic example of a very intrusive technology being rolled out with zero public debate. The public hasn’t been given even the most basic information about what information is being recorded, how long it is kept or who is able to access it. When you consider the system allows every journey to be tracked, down to the second, and for someone to search through the entire log of when your car was scanned and where, it is without doubt an ex-

tremely intrusive system. How many people would have said yes if they had been asked to install a device on their car so the police could monitor their journeys? Yet this is exactly what ANPR technology allows. It is a total failure of law and oversight if this massive yet secretive expansion of ANPR systems is legal.’ Julian Blazeby, from the Association of Chief Police Officers, claims the cameras are: ‘One of the jewels of modern policing. It is always a challenge for us, balancing the rights of individuals with preventing and detecting crime. However, we want to be as transparent as possible and perhaps in the past we have not been as open as we could have been. We want to reassure the public we are doing everything we can to prevent the misuse of the systems, with national standards and guidelines in place.’

Google To Launch Spain Loves free Taxis Spanish Made Cars

XPenSIVe TAXIS are often the last and only option for getting where you need to go. Imagine a world where a robot driver picks you up from your house, and instead of trying to work out the highest price he can get away with, your automated ride takes you to where you want to be completely free of charge, that’s exactly what Google is proposing. Next time you fancy a romantic meal for two, or a trip to the cinema, you could be taken there in a free taxi, courtesy of Google, the journeys would be paid for by advertisers hoping to encourage more people to use their businesses. The system would run on Google’s existing AdWords software, and in the future, these journeys could even be carried out by Google’s self-driving cars. According to a Google patent, journeys would be paid for by advertisers hoping to encourage more people to use their businesses. Local businesses would compete for adverts, in the same way firms currently compete for Google adverts online. Google would use location data, and other relevant personalised information including browsing history, to show relevant ads on a smartphone. Additionally, these adverts could be shown at bus stops and train stations on a kiosk For example, if a group of friends are on a night out and want to go somewhere for dinner, they could sign into Google+ and select

IX OuT of the 10 most sold cars last year were made in Spain.

how many people are in the group, and even what kind of food they want. The final choice of adverts would be chosen using an algorithm that works out how much the journey will cost the business, and how much money the business is likely to make from any sales that take place. Once Google’s self-driving cars are approved, businesses could dispatch the autonomous vehicles to collect their customers. Google says: ‘Getting a potential customer to a business location in order to conduct a sale may be one of the most difficult tasks for a business or advertiser. An advertiser may have to offer various inducements, such as coupons, discounts, parking validations, in order to entice customers to the location. In some examples, ‘brick and mortar’ businesses may even be forced to invest in more costly real estate near high-traffic areas as opposed to lower-cost real estate in more isolated locations. These factors may create a significant financial burden to a business.’

During 2013, the bestselling model in Spain was the Citroen C4 with 23,837 units sold. The multi-purpose versions of this vehicle, the C4 Picasso and Grand C4 Picasso, are manufactured at the

PSA Peugeot Citroen plant in Vigo. The second bestselling model last year, With 23,310 units sold, the Renault Megane, is made at the French manufacturer’s plant in Palencia. The third bestselling car of 2013, the Seat Ibiza and ninth, the Seat Leo, are both manufactured in Martorell (Barcelona).

In fifth place, the Volkswagen Polo, is made at the plant the German manufacturer has in Landaben (Navarra The Opel Corsa made at the General Motors plant in Figueruelas (Zaragoza), is the last model manufactured in Spain to appear in the top 10 bestselling cars of the year.

TREASURE ISLAND TV GUIDE

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

31 J a n u a r y

Friday - TV 09:15: Wanted Down Under 10:00: Homes Under the Hammer 11:00: The Sheriffs are Coming 11:45: Helicopter Heroes Down Under 12:15: Bargain Hunt 13:00: BBC News at One 13:45: Doctors 14:10: Father Brown 15:00: Perfection 15:45: Escape to the Country 16:30: Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 17:15: Pointless 18:00: BBC News at Six 19:00: The One Show 19:30: A Question of Sport 20:00: EastEnders 20:30: Room 101 21:00: Silent Witness 22:00: BBC News at Ten 22:25: BBC London News 22:35: Graham Norton Show 23:25: Football Focus 00:00: EastEnders Omnibus 01:55: Weatherview

06:00: 06:55: 07:45: 08:30: 09:30: 10:30: 11:30: 12:30: 13:30: 14:00: 16:10: 17:05: 18:00: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 23:15: 00:25: 01:20:

Emmerdale You’ve Been Framed! The Jeremy Kyle Show USA Dinner Date The Real Housewives of Atlanta Real Housewives of Orange County The Millionaire Matchmaker Emmerdale You’ve Been Framed! Jeremy Kyle Show Real Housewives of Orange County The Millionaire Matchmaker Dinner Date You’ve Been Framed! Two and a Half Men The Bourne Supremacy Take Me Out Two and a Half Men Dads

07:45: 08:15: 09:00: 10:00: 11:00: 12:00: 13:00: 13:30: 14:15: 15:15: 16:15: 17:15: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 20:30: 21:00: 22:00: 22:30: 23:05: 01:00:

06:00: 06:25: 07:20: 08:20: 09:30: 09:55: 10:20: 10:50: 11:50: 13:00: 14:00: 15:05: 16:05: 16:40: 17:15: 17:50: 18:50: 19:55: 21:00: 22:00: 23:00: 00:40:

Helicopter Heroes Down Under Paul Hollywood’s Pies and Puds Cold War, Hot Jets Question Time BBC News The Daily Politics Britain’s First Photo Album Cash in the Attic The Great British Bake Off Coast Lost Land of the Tiger Flog It! Eggheads Great British Railway Journeys The Great Interior Design Challenge Mastermind An Island Parish Natural World QI Newsnight Tennis Question Time

Fresh Fields Heartbeat The Royal Agatha Christie’s Poirot Judge Judy Judge Judy Judge Judy Murder, She Wrote The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes Heartbeat The Royal Agatha Christie’s Poirot Fresh Fields Duty Free George and Mildred Heartbeat Murder, She Wrote Agatha Christie’s Poirot William and Mary Scott and Bailey The Vice Intolerable Cruelty

08:30: 09:25: 10:30: 11:25: 11:30: 12:30: 13:30: 14:00: 15:00: 16:00: 17:00: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 20:30: 21:00: 22:00: 22:35: 23:35: 00:30:

06:00: 06:25: 06:45: 07:35: 08:00: 08:35: 09:35: 10:35: 11:40: 12:45: 13:45:

14:40: 15:45: 16:50: 17:55: 18:55: 19:30: 20:00: 21:00: 23:00: 01:00: 02:00:

Lorraine Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning ITV News This Morning Loose Women ITV News and Weather Dickinson’s Real Deal The Alan Titchmarsh Show Britain’s Best Bakery The Chase ITV News London ITV News Emmerdale Coronation Street The Martin Lewis Money Show Coronation Street Piers Morgan’s Life Stories ITV News at Ten and Weather The Americans Benidorm Jackpot247

06:25: 07:10: 08:00:

Motorway Patrol Motorway Patrol The Sweeney Cheers Cheers Kojak Magnum, P.I. Minder The Professionals The Sweeney World’s Wildest Police Videos Kojak Magnum, P.I. Minder The Professionals Cheers Cheers The Sweeney Sweeney! Buried The Motorbike Show Minder

06:00: 07:10: 07:35: 08:00: 08:30: 09:00: 10:00: 11:00: 11:30: 12:00: 12:30: 13:00: 14:00: 15:00: 15:30: 16:00: 16:30: 17:00: 18:00: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 21:00:

9:00: 10:00: 11:00: 12:00: 12:05: 13:05: 14:10: 15:10: 16:00: 17:00: 17:30: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 22:50: 23:20: 00:55: 01:00:

22:00: 22:40: 23:20: 00:00: 01:00:

Countdown Will and Grace Everybody Loves Raymond Frasier Secret Millionaire USA Sarah Beeny’s Selling Houses Channel 4 News Summary Come Dine with Me Come Dine with Me A Place in the Sun Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me Coach Trip The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News Jamie and Jimmy’s Friday Night Feast The Jump The Last Leg Brooklyn Nine-Nine Saw IV Random Acts Random Acts

Children’s TV Peppa Pig Milkshake! Show Songs 08:35: Toby’s Travelling Circus 08:50: Bananas in Pyjamas 09:00: Tickety Toc 09:15: The Wright Stuff 11:15: The Hotel Inspector 12:10: 5 News Lunchtime 12:15: Ultimate Police Interceptors 13:15: Home and Away 13:45: Neighbours 14:15: The Mentalist 15:15: Angels Fall 17:00: 5 News at 5 17:30: Neighbours 18:00: Home and Away 18:30: Newstalk Live 19:00: Building the London Underground 20:00: Ice Road Truckers 21:00: Ben Fogle: New Lives in the Wild 22:00: The Siege 00:15: Super Casin

Home Shopping Megatruckers Megatruckers The Gadget Show The Gadget Show Top Gear Top Gear Megatruckers Megatruckers Trawlermen Trawlermen Top Gear Top Gear Megatruckers Megatruckers Trawlermen Trawlermen Top Gear Top Gear Megatruckers Megatruckers Suits Dynamo: Magician Impossible Mock the Week Mock the Week QI Suits Mock the Week

06:00: Cricket 09:30: Football’s Greatest International Teams 10:00: Copa Del Rey Football 11:00: Barclays Premier League World 11:30: Football’s Greatest International Teams 12:00: Ringside 13:00: The Rugby Club 14:00: FL72 - Preview 15:00: Copa Del Rey Football 16:00: Ringside 17:00: FL72 - Preview 18:00: Football’s Greatest International Teams 18:30: Barclays Premier League Preview 19:00: The Fantasy Football Club 20:00: Deadline Day Live 22:00: Deadline Day Live 00:00: The Fantasy Football Club 01:00: Barclays Premier League Preview 01:30: Football Gold

06:00 08:25: 08:30:

19:00: Tennis 23:05: Family Guy 23:30: Family Guy 23:50: Live at the Electric Another visit to television’s finest theatre of comedy. 00:20: American Dad! 00:45: American Dad! 01:00: Uncle 01:30: Sun, Sex and Suspicious Parents

11:00: 13:10: 15:15: 17:10:

Murphy’s War Detective Story Sink the Bismarck! The Seventh Voyage of Sinbad 19:05: Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging 21:00: Braveheart Mel Gibson directs and stars in this Oscarladen epic as William Wallace, the medieval Scottish patriot. 00:20: Friday the 13th

06:00: 06:30: 07:00: 08:00: 12:00: 13:00: 14:00: 15:00: 16:00: 17:00: 17:30: 18:00: 19:00: 19:30: 22:00: 22:30: 23:00: 23:30:

01:30:

Cricket Ashes Modern Classics Ringside Cricket Cricket Thinking Tackle Cricket Cricket The Rugby Club Sporting Greats Sporting Greats Cricket IRB Sevens World Series Rugby Highlights Rugby Union Sporting Greats Sporting Greats Barclays Premier League Preview World Wrestling Entertainment Late Night Smackdown World Wrestling Entertainment Late Night Bottom Line

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

TREASURE ISLAND TV GUIDE

S a t u r d ay - T V 06:00: 10:00: 11:30: 12:00: 12:45: 13:00: 13:05: 13:10: 13:15: 14:00: 16:30: 18:55: 19:05: 19:08: 19:10: 20:30: 21:20: 22:10: 22:25: 22:30: 23:55: 01:15: 01:20:

06:00: 06:45: 06:55: 09:20: 12:45: 13:45: 13:50: 14:35: 15:35: 15:40: 16:45: 17:15: 17:45: 18:50: 19:50: 19:55: 21:00: 22:00: 22:05: 23:10: 00:10: 01:10: 01:15:

Breakfast Saturday Kitchen Live Food and Drink Football Focus Saturday Sportsday BBC News Regional News Weather Bargain Hunt Six Nations Rugby Union Six Nations Rugby Union BBC News Regional News Weather The Voice UK The National Lottery: Who Dares Wins Casualty BBC News Weather Match of the Day The Football League Show Weatherview BBC News

Beauty and the Geek The Hot Desk Coronation Street Omnibus Emmerdale Omnibus Honey FYI Daily Honey Peter Pan FYI Daily Peter Pan You’ve Been Framed! You’ve Been Framed! You’ve Been Framed! Kids Special Miss Congeniality FYI Daily Miss Congeniality Quantum of Solace FYI Daily Quantum of Solace The Magaluf Weekender Funny People FYI Daily Funny People

06:00: 06:35: 07:40: 09:10: 10:05: 11:00: 11:30: 12:00: 12:45: 13:15: 14:15: 16:30: 17:15: 18:00: 19:00: 20:00: 20:30: 21:15: 23:00: 01:00:

Preview Enchanted April The Maggie Life with Eliza Life on Earth Fred Dibnah’s Made in Britain Great British Railway Journeys The A-Z of TV Cooking The Good Cook The Big Bread Experiment Anchors Aweigh Final Score Coast Natural World Flog It! Dad’s Army QI XL Made in Dagenham Tennis Comfort and Joy

06:00: Movies Now 06:10: The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes 07:05: Life with Judy Garland Me and My Shadows 09:05: Columbo 11:10: Agatha Christie’s Marple 13:20: Agatha Christie’s Poirot 14:25: Summer Holiday 15:25: FYI Daily 15:30: Summer Holiday 16:40: Inspector Morse 19:00: Rosemary and Thyme 20:00: Doc Martin 21:00: Vera 23:00: A Touch of Frost 00:45: The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes 01:40: Judge Judy 02:00: Judge Judy

1 February st

06:00: 09:25: 09:30: 10:30: 11:30: 11:45: 12:40: 14:50: 16:50: 18:25: 18:35: 18:50: 20:20: 21:35: 22:35: 22:50: 00:55: 03:45:

06:00: 06:50: 07:40: 08:10: 08:45: 09:10: 10:10: 11:10: 12:15: 12:45: 13:15: 14:15: 14:20: 15:30: 16:30: 16:35: 18:10: 19:10: 19:15: 19:55: 22:00: 23:00: 23:05: 23:55: 01:00:

CITV ITV News Dinner Date Murder, She Wrote ITV News and Weather The Crocodile Hunter Diaries Charade Midsomer Murders Johnny English Regional News and Weather ITV News and Weather Splash! Take Me Out The Jonathan Ross Show ITV News and Weather Bloody Sunday Jackpot247 ITV Nightscreen

The Sweeney Cheers Cheers Cheers Motorway Patrol Bundesliga Minder I Want That Car Duck Dynasty Duck Dynasty Aces High FYI Daily Aces High Dunkirk FYI Daily Dunkirk The Gunfight at Dodge City FYI Daily The Gunfight at Dodge City Hornblower First Blood FYI Daily First Blood River Monsters River Monsters

06:10: 07:00: 08:00: 09:00: 09:30: 10:00: 10:30: 11:00: 11:30: 12:00: 12:35: 13:30: 15:55: 17:00: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:45: 01:30:

06:00: 07:15: 08:05: 10:00: 11:00: 11:30: 12:00: 12:30: 13:00: 14:00: 15:00: 15:30: 16:00: 16:30: 17:00: 18:00: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:00: 00:00: 01:00:

Bigfoot Files Channel 4 - 20:00 - 21:00

s ‘Bigfoot’ an ancient member of the human family like neanderthals? Are they giant apes or some other species? Or are they simply hoaxes? A leading British geneticist believes he has the tools to finally answer the riddle. In this three-part documentary series Bryan Sykes, Oxford Professor of Human Genetics, alongside presenter Mark Evans, embarks on a global quest to answer scientifically, once and for all, the mystery of ‘Bigfoot’. Professor Sykes put out a worldwide call for samples and he’s assembled substantial physical evidence that has been subjected to the most sophisticated DNA

tests available. In this programme, Mark Evans visits America’s Pacific Northwest in search of ‘Sasquatch’. In 1958 a digger driver called Jerry Crew found a series of huge footprints in Willow Creek, Northern California and the Bigfoot legend took off. Since then the region has had over 1000 Bigfoot encounters. But for decades science has scorned the idea of Bigfoot and anyone who studies it. Mark meets some of the Bigfootologists who believe they’ve come face to face with these creatures: Justin Smeja, who claims to have shot two Sasquatch; Vietnam vet Dan Shirley, who claims he can communicate with Bigfoot by ‘wood knocking’and Native American Marcel Cagey, who says a Sasquatch changed his life.

The Hoobs Transworld Sport The Morning Line Everybody Loves Raymond Frasier The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory How I Met Your Mother How I Met Your Mother The Simpsons Undercover Boss USA Channel 4 Racing Come Dine with Me Come Dine with Me Come Dine with Me Channel 4 News Speed with Guy Martin Bigfoot Files Hostages Priest 28 Weeks Later Street Kings

10:00: 12:00: 13:45: 14:45:

Home Shopping Meat Men Top Gear Storage Hunters Flip Men Flip Men Lizard Lick Towing Lizard Lick Towing Top Gear Top Gear Storage Hunters Storage Hunters Lizard Lick Towing Lizard Lick Towing Top Gear Dynamo: Magician Impossible Storage Hunters Storage Hunters QI XL Russell Howard’s Good News Extra Russell Howard’s Good News Russell Howard’s Good News QI XL Russell Howard’s Good News Extra

06:30: 07:30:

16:45: 18:40: 18:45: 19:35: 20:30: 22:10: 00:10:

08:00: 09:00: 10:00: 12:00: 14:30: 15:00: 18:00: 20:00:

23:30: 00:00: 01:00:

Bewitched Blue Streak Diagnosis Murder Columbo Make Me a Perfect Murder. Series 7, episode 3. Peter Falk, Trish Van Devere, Laurence Luckinbill. Lieutenant Columbo tackles a murder in the media industry after a ruthless TV executive is passed over for promotion and decides to kill her boss. Columbo is soon on her trail, but she makes life difficult by covering her tracks carefully. Director: James Frawley. Columbo 5 News NCIS NCIS War on Terror The Contract Super Casino

19:00: 20:00:

Ringside Barclays Premier League Preview The Fantasy Football Club Game Changers Soccer A.M. FL72 Live Saturday Night Football: Team Talk Gillette Soccer Saturday Football Fight Night Lee Selby v Rendall Munroe (British and Vacant European Featherweight Titles). Lee Selby takes on Rendall Munroe at Motorpoint Arena Cardiff for the British and European featherweight titles. FL72 Saturday Reloaded Saturday Night Football: Match Choice

06:00:

23:00: 23:22: 23:44: 00:06: 00:28: 00:50: 01:12: 02:00:

11:00: 13:00: 15:10: 16:55: 18:45: 21:00:

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07:00: 07:15: 07:30: 08:00: 09:00: 10:00: 10:30: 11:30: 12:00: 13:00: 15:00: 16:00: 18:00: 19:30: 20:00: 22:00: 23:30: 00:00:

Top Gear Tennis Davis Cup. Coverage of the latest tennis action. Family Guy Family Guy Family Guy Family Guy Family Guy Family Guy Family Guy Uncle

The Valley of Gwangi The Devil Wears Prada Nacho Libre The 39 Steps A Good Year Shooter Mark Wahlberg stars as Bob Swagger, an ex-special ops sharpshooter. The Fourth Kind Revenge of the Nerds

Glasgow Continental Cup 2013 Football Gold Football Gold IRB Sevens World Series Rugby Highlights LV=Cup Rugby Ringside IRB Sevens World Series Rugby Highlights LV=Cup Rugby IRB Sevens World Series Rugby Highlights Ringside WWE SmackDown! WWE Bottom Line WWE SmackDown! NFL NFL Saturday Night Football: Game of the Day Saturday Night Football: Match Choice NFL Women’s Rugby

Editor Recommends

TREASURE ISLAND TV GUIDE

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Sunday - TV

07:30: 09:00: 10:00: 11:00: 12:15: 13:00: 13:10: 13:15: 13:45: 14:30: 17:00: 17:35: 17:55: 18:00: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 22:20: 22:25: 23:10: 23:50: 01:45:

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19:50: 19:55:

21:00: 22:00: 23:00: 23:05: 00:15:

Match of the Day The Andrew Marr Show The Big Questions Sunday Politics MOTD2 Extra BBC News Weather for the Week Ahead Bargain Hunt The Indian Doctor Six Nations Rugby Union Songs of Praise BBC News Weather Fake or Fortune? Countryfile Call the Midwife The Musketeers BBC News Weather Have I Got Old News for You Who Do You Think You Are? USA Breaking and Entering Weatherview

Beauty and the Geek Emmerdale Omnibus Coronation Street Omnibus Take Me Out You’ve Been Framed! Dennis FYI Daily Dennis Despicable Me FYI Daily Despicable Me The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor FYI Daily The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor The Magaluf Weekender The Faculty FYI Daily The Faculty Mom

06:00: 06:05: 07:25: 09:10: 10:05: 11:35: 12:20: 12:50: 13:20: 15:45: 16:45: 17:15: 18:00: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:00: 01:00: 02:00: 02:55:

06:00: 06:55: 07:55: 08:00: 09:05: 10:05: 11:10: 12:10: 14:25: 16:35: 18:45: 21:00:

22:00: 23:00: 23:05: 00:05: 01:15:

Preview The Whip Hand I’m Alright Jack Countryfile Saturday Kitchen Best Bites The A-Z of TV Cooking The Good Cook The Good Cook Funny Girl Escape to the Country The Olympic Journey: Inspire Ski Sunday Dan Snow’s History of the Winter Olympics Flog It! Top Gear Dragons’ Den The Route Masters: Running London’s Roads Tennis Countryfile Holby City This is BBC Two

The Blackheath Poisonings Summer Holiday FYI Daily Summer Holiday Heartbeat Heartbeat Rosemary and Thyme Inspector Morse Agatha Christie’s Marple Lewis Agatha Christie’s Poirot Les Dawson: An Audience with That Never Was Steptoe and Son FYI Daily Steptoe and Son Cracker And Then There Were None

10:20: 11:20: 11:25: 12:25: 13:25: 14:10: 15:40: 17:50: 18:00: 18:15: 19:45: 20:30: 21:00: 22:00: 22:15: 22:45: 23:45: 00:40:

06:00: 06:15: 08:05: 09:00: 10:00: 11:00: 12:00: 14:10: 15:10: 15:15: 17:15: 18:15: 18:20: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 22:05: 22:55: 23:55: 00:55: 01:00:

Murder, She Wrote ITV News and Weather Inside the National Trust The Crocodile Hunter Diaries Catchphrase Splash! Goldfinger Regional News and Weather ITV News and Weather Dancing on Ice All Star Family Fortunes Dancing on Ice Mr Selfridge ITV News and Weather Birds of a Feather Piers Morgan’s Life Stories Rugby Highlights The Store

06:10: 07:00:

Greatest World Cup Matches Cheers World’s Wildest Police Videos The Motorbike Show Motorway Patrol Ax Men The Professionals All Quiet on the Western Front FYI Daily All Quiet on the Western Front The Rawhide Years FYI Daily The Rawhide Years Storage Wars Rugby Highlights The Quest FYI Daily The Quest Hell on Wheels Guest House Paradiso FYI Daily Guest House Paradiso

06:00: 07:10: 08:00: 10:00: 10:30: 11:00: 11:40: 12:20:

www.bonadea2catamaran.com

Tel. 922 714 500 Whale Watching Puerto Colon 2 Hours 22 Euros

07:25: 07:55: 08:25: 09:30: 12:30: 13:00: 13:25: 13:55: 14:25: 14:55: 15:30: 17:30: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:30: 05:45:

13:00: 14:00: 15:00: 16:00: 16:30: 17:00: 18:00: 18:40: 19:20: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 22:40: 23:20: 00:20:

The Hoobs Everybody Loves Raymond Frasier Frasier The Taste Sunday Brunch The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory How I Met Your Mother How I Met Your Mother The Simpsons The Simpsons Eragon Deal or No Deal Channel 4 News Jamie and Jimmy’s Friday Night Feast Scandimania The Jump The Super Bowl: American Football Live Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard

10:00:

Home Shopping Hardliners Top Gear Man v Food Man v Food Red Dwarf Red Dwarf Have I Got News for You Top Gear Top Gear Dynamo: Magician Impossible Man v Food Man v Food Top Gear Red Dwarf Red Dwarf Have I Got News for You Have I Got a Bit More News for You Have I Got a Bit More News for You Mock the Week Mock the Week Have I Got a Bit More News for You Have I Got a Bit More News for You

06:00:

10:35: 11:00: 11:10: 12:10: 13:10: 14:10: 15:10: 16:50: 18:55: 19:00:

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18:30: 20:00: 22:00:

February

Power Rangers Super Samurai Power Rangers: Megaforce Access Building the London Underground Ice Road Truckers Ben Fogle: New Lives in the Wild Police Interceptors Doctor Dolittle 2 Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory 5 News Arachnophobia Chilling horror in which an American doctor comes to a new town and finds his patients falling victim to a deadly tropical variety of the very species he loathes. Drag Me to Hell The Matrix Super Casino

19:00: 20:15: 23:05: 23:25: 23:45: 00:15: 00:37: 01:00: 01:30:

Saturday Night Football: Match Choice Game Changers FL72 The Sunday Supplement Goals on Sunday Ford Super Sunday West Bromwich Albion v Liverpool. West Bromwich Albion welcome Liverpool to the Hawthorns for this Barclays Premier League clash. Ford Super Sunday Arsenal v Crystal Palace. Arsenal entertain Crystal Palace at the Emirates Stadium in the Barclays Premier League. Football Football American Football

06:00: 06:30:

02:00:

11:00: 13:00: 15:10: 17:10: 19:15: 20:55: 21:00: 23:25: 01:35:

07:00: 07:30: 08:00: 12:00: 13:00: 13:30: 14:30: 15:00: 18:00: 18:30: 19:30: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:30: 00:00: 01:00:

The Voice UK Tennis Family Guy Family Guy Uncle American Dad! American Dad! Bad Education Live at the Electric Sun, Sex and Suspicious Parents

Gunman’s Walk Grease Ramona and Beezus Home Alone The Man Black Swan Interview Special Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy Lucky Number Slevin The Page Turner

Cricket Ashes Modern Classics Ashes Modern Classics NFL Cricket Cricket NFL NFL NFL Indoor Hockey NFL NFL NFL Cricket Cricket Ford Football Special Premier League 100 Club La Liga Ford Football Special

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

TREASURE ISLAND TV GUIDE

3 February

M o n d ay - T V 09:15:

Wanted Down Under Revisited 10:00: Homes Under the Hammer 11:00: The Sheriffs are Coming 11:45: Saints and Scroungers 12:15: Bargain Hunt 13:00: BBC News 13:45: Doctors 14:15: WPC 56 15:00: Perfection 15:45: Escape to the Country 16:30: Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 17:15: Pointless 18:00: BBC News 19:00: The One Show 19:30: Inside Out 20:00: EastEnders 20:30: Panorama 21:00: Britain’s Great War 22:00: BBC News 22:35: Match of the Day 2 23:40: Graham Norton Show 00:25: Weatherview

07:25: 07:45: 08:30: 09:30: 10:30: 11:30: 12:30: 13:00: 14:00: 16:10: 17:05: 18:00: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 21:30: 22:00: 22:30: 23:00: 23:50: 00:20:

You’ve Been Framed! Jeremy Kyle Show USA Dinner Date The Real Housewives of Atlanta Real Housewives of Orange County The Millionaire Matchmaker Emmerdale Coronation Street Jeremy Kyle Show Real Housewives of Orange County The Millionaire Matchmaker Dinner Date You’ve Been Framed! Two and a Half Men Mom Dads The Job Lot Plebs Fake Reaction Two and a Half Men Two and a Half Men

09:05: 10:05: 10:35: 11:00: 12:00: 13:00: 13:30: 14:15: 15:15: 16:15: 17:15: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 20:30: 21:00: 22:00: 22:30: 23:20: 00:20:

06:00: 06:25: 07:20: 08:20: 09:30: 09:55: 10:20: 10:45: 11:45: 12:55: 14:00: 15:05: 16:15: 16:50: 17:20: 17:55: 18:55: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:05: 00:45: 01:40: 02:00:

Ben and James Versus the Arabian Desert Britain’s Empty Homes Click BBC News The Daily Politics Britain’s First Photo Album Cash in the Attic The Great British Bake Off Coast Lost Land of the Tiger Flog It! Eggheads Great Continental Railways Top Gear University Challenge Food and Drink Horizon QI Newsnight The Coffee Trail with Simon Reeve Film 2014

Fresh Fields Heartbeat The Royal Agatha Christie’s Poirot Judge Judy Judge Judy Judge Judy Murder, She Wrote The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes Heartbeat The Royal Agatha Christie’s Poirot Fresh Fields Duty Free George and Mildred Heartbeat Murder, She Wrote Agatha Christie’s Poirot Long Lost Family The Town The Vice Agatha Christie’s Poirot Judge Judy ITV3 Nightscreen

DCI Banks

08:30: 09:25: 10:30: 11:25: 11:30: 12:30: 13:30: 14:00: 15:00: 16:00: 17:00: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 20:30: 21:00: 22:00: 22:35: 00:30:

06:00: 06:05: 06:50: 07:45: 08:10: 08:40: 09:45: 10:50: 11:50: 12:50: 13:50: 14:45: 15:50: 16:55: 17:55: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 20:30: 21:00: 21:30: 22:00: 23:00: 00:00: 01:00: 02:00:

Lorraine Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning ITV News This Morning Loose Women ITV News and Weather Dickinson’s Real Deal The Alan Titchmarsh Show Britain’s Best Bakery The Chase Regional News and Weather ITV News Emmerdale Coronation Street A Great Welsh Adventure with Griff Rhys Jones Coronation Street DCI Banks ITV News at Ten and Weather Mickey Blue Eyes Jackpot247

World of Sport World’s Wildest Police Videos The Sweeney Cheers Cheers Kojak Magnum, P.I. Minder The Professionals The Sweeney World’s Wildest Police Videos Kojak Magnum, P.I. Minder The Professionals Cheers Cheers Storage Wars Storage Wars Storage Wars Storage Wars Ax Men Bundesliga Rugby Highlights Buried FYI Daily

07:10: 08:00: 09:00: 10:00: 11:00: 12:00: 12:05: 12:35: 15:10: 16:00: 17:00: 17:30: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 20:30: 21:00: 22:30:

23:30: 23:35:

Produced by award-winning indie Left Bank Pictures, the new series comprises of 6 x 60’ episodes based on three of the internationally successful novels from the pen of author and Banks creator Peter Robinson. Two episodes are devoted to each of the three stories entitled Wednesday’s Child, Piece of My Heart and Bad Boy. The series sees the return from maternity leave of DS Annie Cabbot, played by Andrea Lowe

Will and Grace Everybody Loves Raymond Frasier Undercover Boss Canada Sarah Beeny’s Selling Houses Channel 4 News Jamie’s 15 Minute Meals Come Dine with Me Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me Coach Trip The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News Dispatches Food Unwrapped The Jump Three Wives, One Husband: Married to the Mormons Random Acts There’s Something About Mary

06:00: Home Shopping 07:10: Storage Hunters 07:35: Storage Hunters 08:00: Man v Food 09:00: Top Gear 10:00: Top Gear 11:00: Storage Hunters 11:30: Storage Hunters 12:00: Man v Food 12:30: Man v Food 13:00: Top Gear 14:00: Top Gear 15:00: Storage Hunters 15:30: Storage Hunters 16:00: Man v Food 16:30: Man v Food 17:00: Top Gear 18:00: Top Gear 19:00: Storage Hunters 19:30: Storage Hunters 20:00: QI XL 21:00: QI XL 22:00: Would I Lie to You? 22:40: Russell Howard’s Good News Extra 23:40: Alexander Armstrong’s Big Ask 00:20: QI XL

ITV - 21:00 - 22:00 CI BAnKS returns for a new sixpart series starring Stephen Tompkinson, Andrea Lowe and Caroline Catz.

(Love Life, Monroe), immediately thrown into a harrowing case for a new single mother. Having acknowledged their feelings for one another in the last series, the new episodes focus on whether a romantic relationship between Banks and Annie can ever be a reality. However, there are inevitable complications as the pair come to acknowledge their own unique and challenging roles as colleagues and parents. Caroline Catz (Doc Martin) also returns to the series playing DI Helen Morton, the disarmingly blunt and often socially inept detective who joined Banks’ team when Annie left for maternity.

09:15: 11:10: 12:10: 12:15: 13:15: 13:45: 14:15: 15:15: 17:00: 17:30: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00:

23:00: 01:00:

06:00: 07:00: 08:00: 09:00: 10:30: 1:00: 12:00: 12:15: 12:30: 12:45: 13:00: 14:30: 15:30: 16:00: 17:00: 18:00: 19:00: 23:00: 00:00: 00:30:

The Wright Stuff The Hotel Inspector 5 News Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead Home and Away Neighbours NCIS The Mystery of Natalie Wood 5 News Neighbours Home and Away Newstalk Live Go Hard or Go Home Police Interceptors Benefits Helix Series that follows a team of scientists from the Centre for Disease Control and Prevention. Starship Troopers 3: Marauder Super Casino

Good Morning Sports Fans Good Morning Sports Fans Good Morning Sports Fans Ford Football Special Spanish Gold La Liga Spanish Gold Spanish Gold Football Gold Football Gold Ford Football Special La Liga The Fantasy Football Club Game Changers Soccer A.M. -The Best Bits FL72 - Review Ford Monday Night Football FL72 - Review SPFL Round Up Soccer A.M. -The Best Bits

19:00:

19:20: 21:00: 22:00: 22:30: 23:00: 23:45: 00:30: 01:00: 02:00:

11:00: 14:05: 16:15: 18:20: 21:00:

23:05: 01:20:

06:00: 07:00: 10:30:

11:00: 11:30:

13:00: 16:30: 17:15: 18:00: 23:00:

Great Movie Mistakes V: Revenge of the Fifth Cars 2 Growing Up Down’s Uncle EastEnders Family Guy American Dad! Uncle Growing Up Down’s Live at the Electric

The Inn of the Sixth Happiness Double Indemnity Murphy’s War A Knight’s Tale Black Swan Natalie Portman´s Oscar-winning performance in Darren Aronofsky’s brooding psychological drama. 4.3.2.1 Nurse Betty

World Judo Championship 2013 Fight Night Sporting Greats Sugar Ray Robinson. A look back on the career of boxing legend Sugar Ray Robinson. The American fought 200 times, winning 128 of his first 131 bouts. He won world titles at welterweight and middleweight level. Racing News Extreme Sports Snow Unleashed. A look at some of the best skiers and snowboarders from around the world. Features spectacular highlights of the alpine sport elite taking to the slopes. Fight Night Super League Gold Super League Gold NFL Super Bowl Fight Night

Editor Recommends

TREASURE ISLAND TV GUIDE

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

4 February

Tu e s d a y - T V

09:15: 10:00: 11:00: 11:45: 12:15: 13:00: 13:45: 14:15: 15:00: 15:45: 16:30: 17:15: 18:00: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 22:35: 23:20:

Wanted Down Under Revisited Homes Under the Hammer The Sheriffs are Coming Saints and Scroungers Bargain Hunt BBC News Doctors WPC 56 Perfection Escape to the Country Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is Pointless BBC News The One Show EastEnders Holby City Death in Paradise BBC News The Richard Dimbleby Lecture 2014 Away From Her

06:00: Emmerdale 06:25: Coronation Street 07:25: You’ve Been Framed! 07:45: Jeremy Kyle Show USA 08:30: Dinner Date 09:30: The Real Housewives of Atlanta 10:30: Real Housewives of Orange County 11:30: The Millionaire Matchmaker 12:30: Emmerdale 13:00: Coronation Street 14:00: Jeremy Kyle Show 16:10: Real Housewives of Orange County 17:05: The Millionaire Matchmaker 18:00: Dinner Date 19:00: You’ve Been Framed! 20:00: Two and a Half Men 21:00: Quantum of Solace 22:00: FYI Daily 22:05: Quantum of Solace 23:10: Tricked 00:10: Two and a Half Men 01:10: Ladette to Lady

08:20: 09:05: 10:05: 10:35: 11:00: 12:00: 13:00: 13:30: 14:15: 15:15: 16:15: 17:15: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 22:30: 23:20: 00:20:

06:00: 06:25: 07:20: 08:20: 09:30: 09:55: 10:20: 10:50: 11:55: 13:00: 14:00: 15:05: 16:15: 16:50: 17:20: 17:55: 18:55: 20:00: 22:00: 23:00: 00:40:

The A-Z of TV Cooking Great British Garden Revival Britain’s Empty Homes HARDtalk BBC News The Daily Politics Britain’s First Photo Album Cash in the Attic The Great British Bake Off Coast Lost Land of the Jaguar Flog It! Eggheads Great Continental Railways The Great Interior Design Challenge Children’s Emergency Rescue Inside the Animal Mind House of Fools Newsnight Dragons’ Den Naked Rambler

Fresh Fields Heartbeat The Royal Agatha Christie’s Poirot Judge Judy Judge Judy Judge Judy Murder, She Wrote The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes Heartbeat The Royal Agatha Christie’s Poirot Fresh Fields Duty Free George and Mildred Heartbeat Murder, She Wrote Midsomer Murders The Town The Vice A Touch of Frost

08:30: 09:25: 10:30: 11:25: 11:30: 12:30: 13:30: 14:00: 15:00: 16:00: 17:00: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 22:35: 23:35: 00:05:

06:00: 06:05: 06:45: 07:35: 08:35: 09:40: 10:40: 11:40: 12:45: 13:45: 14:40: 15:45: 16:50: 17:55: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:00: 23:05: 00:00: 01:00: 01:05:

Lorraine Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning ITV News This Morning Loose Women ITV News and Weather Dickinson’s Real Deal The Alan Titchmarsh Show Britain’s Best Bakery The Chase Regional News ITV News Emmerdale River Monsters Celebrity Who Wants to be a Millionaire? Births, Deaths and Marriages ITV News at Ten Sports Life Stories The Crocodile Hunter Diaries Jackpot247

Uefa Champions League Hat-Trick Heroes World’s Wildest Police Videos The Sweeney Cheers Kojak Magnum, P.I. Minder The Professionals The Sweeney World’s Wildest Police Videos Kojak Magnum, P.I. Minder The Professionals Cheers I Want That Car Duck Dynasty Rambo: First Blood Part II FYI Daily Rambo: First Blood Part II Species III FYI Daily Species III

07:10: 08:00: 09:00: 10:00: 11:00: 12:00: 12:05: 12:35: 14:35: 15:10: 16:00: 17:00: 17:30: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:00: 00:00: 00:05:

06:00: 07:10: 08:00: 09:00: 10:00: 11:00: 11:30: 12:00: 12:30: 13:00: 14:00: 15:00: 15:30: 16:00: 16:30: 17:00: 18:00: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 20:30: 21:00: 22:00: 22:40: 23:20: 00:00: 01:00: 01:40:

Will and Grace Everybody Loves Raymond Frasier Undercover Boss Canada Sarah Beeny’s Selling Houses Channel 4 News Jamie’s 15 Minute Meals Come Dine with Me Come Dine with Me Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me Coach Trip The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News Location, Location, Location The Taste Secrets of the Pickpockets The Undateables Random Acts Pokerstars.Com Ept Barcelona

Home Shopping Storage Hunters Man v Food Top Gear Top Gear Storage Hunters Storage Hunters Man v Food Man v Food Top Gear Top Gear Storage Hunters Storage Hunters Man v Food Man v Food Top Gear Top Gear Flip Men Flip Men Storage Hunters Storage Hunters QI XL Mock the Week Mock the Week Never Mind the Buzzcocks QI XL Mock the Week Mock the Week

09:15: 11:10: 12:10: 12:15: 13:15: 13:45: 14:15: 15:15:

17:00: 17:30: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:00: 01:05:

06:00:

The Wright Stuff The Hotel Inspector 5 News Ultimate Emergency Bikers Home and Away Neighbours NCIS The Mystery of Natalie Wood Starring: Justine Waddell, Michael Weatherly, Matthew Settle, Colin Friels, Elizabeth Rice, Grace Fulton 5 News Neighbours Home and Away Benefits Go Hard or Go Home Police Interceptors Benefits Helix Starship Troopers 3: Marauder Access

Good Morning Sports Fans 07:00: Good Morning Sports Fans 08:00: Good Morning Sports Fans 09:00: Ford Monday Night Football 11:30: SPFL Round Up 12:00: FL72 - Review 13:00: Ford Monday Night Football 15:30: SPFL Round Up 16:00: FL72 - Review 17:00: Barclays Premier League Review 18:00: Football’s Greatest International Teams 18:30: Revista de la Liga 19:30: Live Coppa Italia 22:00: Revista de la Liga 23:00: Barclays Premier League Review 00:00: Coppa Italia 01:00: Football’s Greatest International Teams 01:30: Revista de la Liga

19:00: Don’t Tell the Bride 20:00: Tough Young Teachers 21:00: Sun, Sex and Suspicious Parents 22:00: Bad Education 22:30: EastEnders 23:00: Family Guy 23:45: American Dad! 00:30: Sun, Sex and Suspicious Parents 01:30: Bad Education 02:00: Pramface

11:00: 12:55: 14:55: 16:50: 18:35: 21:00: 23:15:

01:20:

06:00: 08:30: 12:00: 12:30: 13:00: 13:30: 17:00: 19:00: 19:15: 19:30: 21:30: 21:45: 22:00: 23:00: 00:00: 00:30: 00:45: 01:00: 01:15: 01:30:

The Outrage Blossoms in the Dust Merrill’s Marauders Siege of the Saxons Ever After The A-Team IP Man Donnie Yen stars in Wilson Yip’s excitingly choreographed period action-drama. The Limey

Ford Monday Night Football Big Bash Cricket Ashes Modern Classics Ashes Modern Classics Ashes Modern Classics Big Bash Cricket WWE SmackDown! From the Vault From the Vault Sheffield Super League Gold Super League Gold Poker - 100 Greatest Moments Polo at the Palace Football Asia Super League Gold Super League Gold Super League Gold Super League Gold Polo at the Palace

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

TREASURE ISLAND TV GUIDE

We d n e s d ay - T V 09:15:

Wanted Down Under Revisited 10:00: Homes Under the Hammer 11:00: The Sheriffs are Coming 11:45: Saints and Scroungers 12:15: Bargain Hunt 13:00: BBC News 13:45: Doctors 14:15: WPC 56 15:00: Perfection 15:45: Escape to the Country 16:30: Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 17:15: Pointless 18:00: BBC News 19:00: The One Show 20:00: Waterloo Road 21:00: Outnumbered 21:30: Mrs. Brown’s Boys 22:00: BBC News 22:35: A Question of Sport 23:05: Film 2014 23:35: The Matador 01:10: Weatherview 01:15: BBC News

06:25: 07:25:

Holiday Airport You’ve Been Framed! 07:45: The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 08:30: Dinner Date 09:30: The Real Housewives of Atlanta 10:30: Real Housewives of Orange County 11:30: The Millionaire Matchmaker 12:30: Emmerdale 13:00: The Cube 14:00: Jeremy Kyle Show 16:10: Real Housewives of Orange County 17:05: The Millionaire Matchmaker 18:00: Dinner Date 19:00: You’ve Been Framed! 20:00: Two and a Half Men 21:00: Benidorm 22:00: The Magaluf Weekender 23:05: Fake Reaction 23:50: Two and a Half Men 00:45: Magaluf Weekender

09:00: 10:00: 10:30: 11:00: 11:30: 13:00: 13:30: 14:15: 15:15: 16:10: 17:10: 17:55: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 22:30: 23:20:

06:25: 07:15: 08:20: 09:30: 09:55: 10:15: 10:40: 11:45: 12:55: 13:55: 15:00: 16:15: 16:50: 17:20: 17:55: 18:55: 19:55: 20:55: 21:00: 22:00: 23:00: 00:05: 01:05:

Nature’s Weirdest Events Rip Off Food See Hear BBC News The Daily Politics Britain’s First Photo Album Cash in the Attic The Great British Bake Off Coast Lost Land of the Jaguar Flog It! Party Political Broadcast by the Liberal Democrats Eggheads Great Continental Railways The Great Interior Design Challenge The Restaurant Man Royal Cousins at War Inside No 9 Newsnight Inside the Animal Mind

06:00: 08:30: 09:25: 10:30: 11:25: 11:30: 12:30: 13:30:

Heartbeat The Royal Agatha Christie’s Poirot Judge Judy Judge Judy Judge Judy Murder, She Wrote The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes Heartbeat The Royal Agatha Christie’s Poirot Fresh Fields Duty Free George and Mildred Heartbeat Murder, She Wrote Housesitter FYI Daily Housesitter The Town The Vice Trial and Retribution The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes

06:00: 06:10:

Inside No. 9

14:00: 15:00: 16:00: 17:00: 18:00: 18:25:

18:30: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 22:00: 22:35: 23:40: 00:30:

06:55: 07:50: 08:15: 08:40: 09:45: 10:45: 11:50: 12:50: 13:55: 14:50: 15:50: 16:55: 17:55: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:05: 00:05: 00:10: 01:10:

5 February th

Daybreak Lorraine Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning ITV News This Morning Loose Women ITV News and Weather Dickinson’s Real Deal The Alan Titchmarsh Show Britain’s Best Bakery The Chase Regional News Party Political Broadcast by the Liberal Democrats ITV News Emmerdale Coronation Street Midsomer Murders ITV News at Ten Jonathan Ross Show The Cube Jackpot247

08:00:

Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Frasier Undercover Boss Canada Sarah Beeny’s Selling Houses Channel 4 News Jamie’s 15 Minute Meals Come Dine with Me Come Dine with Me Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me Coach Trip The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News The Restoration Man 24 Hours in A and E Hunted Don’t Look Down Random Acts Launched at Red Bull Studios with Sony Xperia Smartphones

09:15: 11:10:

World of Sport World’s Wildest Police Videos The Sweeney Cheers Cheers Kojak Magnum, P.I. Minder The Professionals The Sweeney World’s Wildest Police Videos Kojak Magnum, P.I. Minder The Professionals Cheers Cheers Touring Cars Legends River Monsters Hell on Wheels Renegades FYI Daily Renegades Minder

06:00: 07:10: 08:00: 09:00: 11:00: 12:00: 12:30: 13:00: 14:00: 15:00: 15:30: 16:00: 16:30: 17:00: 18:00: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 20:30: 21:00:

Home Shopping Storage Hunters Flip Men Top Gear Storage Hunters Flip Men Flip Men Top Gear Top Gear Storage Hunters Storage Hunters Flip Men Flip Men Top Gear Top Gear Storage Hunters Storage Hunters Man v Food Man v Food Have I Got a Bit More News for You 22:00: Russell Howard Live: Dingledodies 23:30: Dave’s One Night Stand 00:30: Have I Got a Bit More News for You 01:30: Russell Howard Live: Dingledodies

06:00:

08:30: 09:00: 10:00: 11:00: 12:00: 12:05: 12:35: 14:35: 15:10: 16:00: 17:00: 17:30: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:00: 00:00: 00:05:

BBC 2 - 22:00 - 22:30

n AnTHOLOGY of darkly comic tales from the minds of Steve Pemberton and Reece Shearsmith (The League Of Gentlemen, Psychoville). For six weeks, you are invited into six very different no. 9s, where the ordinary and mundane rub shoulders with the extraordinary and macabre. From a grand country house where an innocent game of Sardines leads to some chilling revelations, to a blood-soaked actor’s dressing room in London’s West End, or the one-bedroom flat of an apparently

happy primary school teacher - these unpredictable tales feature high comedy, unexpected twists, and claustrophobic horror by turns. In Sardines, it is the day of Rebecca and Jeremy’s engagement party, and everyone (well, nearly everyone) has turned up to the old house to wish them well. Except that one of the bedrooms – the one with all the old baggage in it – has been left unlocked... Starring Reece Shearsmith as Stu and Steve Pemberton as Carl. Guest starring Timothy West as Andrew; Anne Reid as Geraldine; Anna Chancellor as Elizabeth; Mark Wootton as Stinky John; Tim Key as Ian; Luke Pasqualino as Kev; Katherine Parkinson as Rebecca; Ophelia Lovibond as Rachel; Julian Rhind-Tutt as Mark; and Ben Willbond as Jeremy.

12:10: 12:15: 13:15: 13:45: 14:15: 15:15: 15:20: 17:00: 17:30: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:00: 23:55: 00:55:

09:00: 10:00: 10:30: 11:00: 12:00: 12:30: 13:00: 14:00: 15:00: 15:30: 16:30: 17:30: 18:00: 19:00: 21:30: 22:30: 23:00: 23:30: 23:45: 00:00:

The Wright Stuff The Hotel Inspector 5 News World’s Worst Holiday Horrors Home and Away Neighbours NCIS Chinese Food in Minutes Prairie Fever 5 News Neighbours Home and Away Newstalk Live The Dog Rescuers Highland Emergency Gibraltar: Britain in the Sun She’s 78, He’s 39: Age Gap Love Law and Order: Special Victims Unit Body of Proof Body of Proof Chinese Food in Minutes

Good Morning Sports Fans Revista de la Liga Football’s Greatest International Teams Football Asia Barclays Premier League Review Football’s Greatest International Teams Football Asia Revista de la Liga Barclays Premier League Review Football’s Greatest International Teams Revista de la Liga Barclays Premier League Review Football’s Greatest International Teams Football Gold Football What’s the Story? Football Gold Total Rugby Darts Gold Darts Gold JP Trophy Football

19:00: Snog, Marry, Avoid? 20:00: Growing Up Down’s 21:00: Extreme Beauty Queens: Secrets of South America 22:00: Sun, Sex and Suspicious Parents 23:00: Family Guy 23:45: American Dad! 00:35: Extreme Beauty Queens: Secrets of South America

11:00: 13:15: 15:35: 18:40:

21:00: 23:05: 01:15:

06:00: 07:00: 07:15: 07:30: 07:45: 08:00: 08:30: 12:00: 13:00: 13:30: 14:00: 14:30: 15:30: 19:00: 19:30: 21:30: 21:45: 21:55:

Helen of Troy Battleground The Towering Inferno A Good Year Russell Crowe stars as Max Skinner, a ruthless stockbroker who unexpectedly inherits a struggling vineyard in Provence. Layer Cake IP Man 2 Reindeer Games

Soccer A.M. The Best Bits One2eleven One2eleven One2eleven One2eleven The Fantasy Football Club Big Bash Cricket Ram Slam T20 2012 Sky Sports Cricket Gold Sky Sports Cricket Gold Sky Sports Cricket Gold Ram Slam T20 2012 Ram Slam T20 Total Rugby Premier League Darts 2014 Preview Darts Gold Football Gold Cricket

Editor Recommends

TREASURE ISLAND TV GUIDE

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Thursday - TV

09:15: 10:00: 11:00: 11:45: 12:15: 13:00: 13:45: 14:15: 15:00: 15:45: 16:30: 17:15: 18:00: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 20:30: 22:00: 22:35: 23:35: 00:20: 00:25:

06:25: 06:55: 07:45: 08:30: 09:30: 10:30: 11:30: 12:30: 13:00: 13:30: 14:00: 16:10: 17:30: 18:30: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 22:50: 23:15: 23:45: 00:35:

Wanted Down Under Revisited Homes Under the Hammer The Sheriffs are Coming Saints and Scroungers Bargain Hunt BBC News Doctors WPC 56 Perfection Escape to the Country Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is Pointless BBC News The One Show EastEnders Pound Shop Wars Inspector George Gently BBC News Question Time This Week Skiing Weatherview BBC News

Coronation Street You’ve Been Framed! The Jeremy Kyle Show USA Dinner Date The Real Housewives of Atlanta Real Housewives of Orange County The Millionaire Matchmaker Emmerdale Coronation Street You’ve Been Framed! Jeremy Kyle Show Real Housewives of New Jersey Dinner Date You’ve Been Framed! Two and a Half Men The Big Reunion Fake Reaction Mom Dads Two and a Half Men Plebs

09:05: 10:05: 10:35: 11:00: 12:00: 13:00: 13:30: 14:15: 15:15: 16:15: 17:15: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 22:30: 23:20: 00:20: 00:50:

06:00: 06:25: 07:15: 08:20: 09:30: 09:55: 10:25: 10:50: 11:55: 13:00: 14:00: 15:05: 16:15: 16:50: 17:20: 17:55: 19:00: 20:00: 22:00: 23:40: 00:40:

Italy Unpacked Rip Off Food HARDtalk BBC News The Daily Politics Britain’s First Photo Album Cash in the Attic The Great British Bake Off Coast Lost Land of the Jaguar Flog It! Eggheads Great Continental Railways Horizon Restoration Home Royal Cousins at War Charlie Brooker’s Weekly Wipe Newsnight Don’t Panic The Truth About Population Panorama Pilgrimage with Simon Reeve

06:00: 08:30: 09:25: 10:30: 11:25: 11:30: 12:30: 13:30:

Fresh Fields Heartbeat The Royal Agatha Christie’s Poirot Judge Judy Judge Judy Judge Judy Murder, She Wrote The Return of Sherlock Holmes Heartbeat The Royal Agatha Christie’s Poirot Fresh Fields Duty Free George and Mildred Heartbeat Murder, She Wrote A Touch of Frost Wire in the Blood The Vice A Touch of Frost

06:00:

14:00: 15:00: 16:00: 17:00: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 20:30: 21:00: 22:00: 22:35: 23:35: 00:05:

06:45: 07:40: 08:05: 08:40: 09:45: 10:50: 11:50: 12:50: 13:50: 14:50: 15:55: 16:55: 18:00: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 20:30: 21:00: 22:00: 22:05: 23:20: 00:20: 00:25: 01:15:

6 February th

Daybreak Lorraine Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning ITV News This Morning Loose Women ITV News and Weather Dickinson’s Real Deal The Alan Titchmarsh Show Britain’s Best Bakery The Chase Regional News ITV News Emmerdale Tonight Emmerdale Birds of a Feather Benidorm ITV News at Ten Exposure: Fashion Factories Undercover Regional News Jackpot247

06:25: 07:10: 08:00:

World’s Wildest Police Videos The Sweeney Cheers Cheers Kojak Magnum, P.I. Minder The Professionals The Sweeney World’s Wildest Police Videos Kojak Magnum, P.I. Minder The Professionals Cheers Cheers Storage Wars Storage Wars Pale Rider FYI Daily Pale Rider The Quest FYI Daily The Quest The Professionals

06:00: 07:10: 07:35: 08:00: 08:30: 09:00: 10:00: 11:00: 11:30: 12:00: 12:30: 13:00: 14:00: 15:00: 15:30: 16:00: 16:30: 17:00: 18:00: 19:00: 19:30: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00:

09:00: 10:00: 11:00: 12:00: 12:05: 12:35: 15:10: 16:00: 17:00: 17:30: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:05: 00:05: 01:00: 01:05:

22:55: 23:35: 00:35: 01:30:

Countdown Will and Grace Everybody Loves Raymond Frasier Undercover Boss Canada Sarah Beeny’s Selling Houses Channel 4 News Jamie’s 15 Minute Meals Come Dine with Me Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me Coach Trip The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News Supersize v Superskinny Big Ballet Bodyshockers My Baggy Body 24 Hours in A and E Random Acts Undercover Boss USA

Home Shopping Storage Hunters Storage Hunters Man v Food Man v Food Top Gear Top Gear Storage Hunters Storage Hunters Man v Food Man v Food Top Gear Top Gear Storage Hunters Storage Hunters Man v Food Man v Food Top Gear Top Gear Storage Hunters Storage Hunters QI XL Suits Have I Got a Bit More News for You Mock the Week QI XL Suits Have I Got a Bit More News for You

09:15: 11:10: 12:10: 12:15: 13:15: 13:45: 14:15: 15:15: 17:00: 17:30: 18:00: 18:30: 19:00: 20:00: 21:00: 22:00: 23:00: 00:00: 01:00:

06:00: 07:00: 08:00: 09:00: 10:00: 10:30: 11:00: 11:30: 12:30: 13:30: 14:30: 18:30: 19:00: 22:30: 23:30: 00:00: 01:00:

The Wright Stuff The Hotel Inspector 5 News Building the London Underground Home and Away Neighbours NCIS Mcbride: The Doctor is Out, Really Out 5 News Neighbours Home and Away Newstalk Live Caught on Camera Police Interceptors NCIS She’s 78, He’s 39: Age Gap Love Benefits Pokerstars: The Big Game Access

20:00: 21:00:

Good Morning Sports Fans Good Morning Sports Fans Good Morning Sports Fans JP Trophy Football Premier League 100 Club Premier League 100 Club Premier League 100 Club JP Trophy Football What’s the Story? Cricket Dubai Racing Carnival Barclays Premier League World Premier League Darts FL72 - Preview Barclays Premier League World NFL Premier League Darts

06:00:

22:00: 22:30: 23:00: 23:45: 00:30: 01:00: 01:30:

11:00: 13:10: 15:00: 16:55: 18:50: 21:00:

22:55:

07:00: 07:15: 07:30: 07:45: 08:00: 11:30: 15:00: 17:00: 18:00: 19:00: 20:00:

21:00: 21:30: 21:45: 21:55:

Motorway Cops Tough Young Teachers Ja’mie: Private School Girl EastEnders Family Guy American Dad! Ja’mie: Private School Girl Russell Howard’s Good News Tough Young Teachers

Yojimbo Winchester ‘73 The Valley of Gwangi The Rare Breed Jungle 2 Jungle East is East Om Puri stars as a Pakistani immigrant is trying to run his fish-and-chip shop while coping with seven children. Snakes on a Plane

What’s the Story? One2eleven One2eleven One2eleven One2eleven International Open Bowls 2014 Ram Slam T20 Premier League Darts FL72 - Preview Ringside FL72 - Preview The Rugby Club Rugby Club. An expert panel of guests weigh in on all the talking points from the world of rugby union. Plus, interviews with some of the biggest names in the game. ATP Tour Uncovered Football Gold Football Gold Cricket

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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Gibraltar And Spain Kept Apart In Draw

Button Zips Around Jerez

uALIFYInG Spain and Gibraltar will be kept apart in the euro 2016 draw, ueFA said last Friday.

Defending champion Spain, refuses to play new UEFA member Gibraltar because of a sovereignty dispute with the British territory. The British Overseas Territory of Gibraltar will be taking part for the first time after being accepted as a member of UEFA last year.

UEFA said that Azerbaijan and Armenia would also be kept apart but Russia and Georgia have agreed to play each other if they are drawn together. Armenia and Azerbaijan, which have a territorial dispute, have been kept apart since their scheduled Euro 2008 qualifiers were cancelled. Russia and Georgia have ended their football spat dating to a brief war in 2008, The two national football associations stated their willingness to play in 2016 European Championship qualifying

matches. UEFA President Michel Platini said: “I’m very pleased to say that the Russians and Georgians can play together if they are in the same group. I’m not sure what political discussions took place between their governments, we’re only in touch with the football associations.” The agreement comes before the qualifying draw next month, and Russia hosting the Sochi Winter Olympics near its border with Georgia.

enSOn BuTTOn steered his repaired McLaren to the fastest lap on Wednesday at the Circuito de Jerez in Jerez de la Frontera, Spain. An electrical problem stopped the former world champion racing on Tuesday, but he was the first out the following morning, setting the benchmark lap time with 1 minute, 24.165 seconds.

Nico Rosberg helped Mercedes rebound from Lewis Hamilton’s crash with the longest run on the second day of Formula One preseason testing. Apart from those two drivers most teams struggled with their new cars following a massive rulebook changes. F1’s new rules include a shift to a 1.6-liter V6 turbo engine from last year’s 2.4-liter V8. They also affect the cars’ fuel limits, weight and body design. Four-time defending world champion

Sebastian Vettel only managed eight laps around the Jerez track before Red Bull’s engine maker, Renault, reported a malfunction and the team decided to call it quits.. Vettel said: “Obviously we’ve not had a lot of running and have a few problems to sort out, but with such big rule changes it is usual to have some teething problems. That’s what tests are for, to sort those issues out.” Rosberg, compared the steering wheel of the new Mercedes F1 W05 to a “smartphone with all the information on it”, led the eight-car field with 97 laps, a day after a front wing problem sent Hamilton’s Mercedes flying into the barrier. McLaren’s promising recovery from Tuesday’s no-show coincided with its hiring of Eric Boullier as its new racing director. Boullier joins a week after leaving rival Lotus, in a restructuring at McLaren that recently included luring back former team principal Ron Dennis as its new chief executive.

made me wonder if being president means putting my family at risk and in anguish,” .” Rosell oversaw the signing of Neymar, Cesc Fabregas, Alexis Sanchez, Javier Mascherano, Jordi Alba, and Alex Song to further strengthen a team built around star forward Lionel Messi. “The best players in the world wear the Barcelona jersey Messi himself is going through his own legal difficulties. The Argentina forward and his father, Jorge, are waiting to hear if they will face charges in a tax fraud case after answering a judge’s questions last year about allegations they avoided 4 million euros ($5.3 million) in back taxes. Rosell steered Barcelona through uncertainty last season when treatment for throat cancer kept coach Tito Vilanova away for several months. Vilanova had to step

down at the end of last season through ill health and Gerardo Martino was brought in to take charge. But while helping to establish Barcelona as Europe’s most successful team, Rosell also upset some members by putting paying sponsors on the front of Barca’s shirts for the first time by striking deals with Qatar Foundation and Qatar Airways. Rosell has faced accusations about his business dealings away from the Camp Nou, with accusations in Brazil he illegally benefited from a friendly organized by his marketing company in 2008. By leaving his powerful job at Barcelona, Rosell also loses seats on influential committees within world football on FIFA and UEFA. Read more here: http://www.bradenton. com/2014/01/23/4951144/barcelonacalls-emergency-board.html#storylink=cpy

Barca president quits

AnDRO ROSeLL , the president of Spanish champion Barcelona resigned last Thursday , facing criminal accusations that he misappropriated funds from the signing of Brazil forward neymar.

A judge in Madrid ruled on Wednesday 22nd, that he will hear a lawsuit that alleges the real cost of Neymar’s transfer from Santos last year was hidden, leaving the expresident facing a lengthy legal battle. The 49-year-old former Nike executive Rosell insists that the deal to bring Neymar to Barcelona was legal, stating: “I don’t want unfair attacks to negatively affect (the) management or the image of the club. This is why I think my time here has come to an end,” Neymar, joined Barcelona for 57 million

euros in June, according to Rosell, the legal action, which was brought by club member Jordi Cases, alleges the real cost of Neymar’s transfer was closer to 95 million euros , and that false contracts hid the real value of the move. The criminal offense of misappropriation of funds is punishable by up to six years in prison. The lawsuit does not accuse Rosell of taking money from the deal. Rosell, who was elected in 2010, said he was leaving to reduce the stress on him and his family and lamented what he described as attacks from both outside and within the club, despite its continued success on the pitch. He added that vice president Josep Bartomeu will take his place and complete the presidential term that expires in 2016: “Through this period of success, my family and I have suffered attacks that have

www.tenerife-weekly.com

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Sochi 2014 A LTHOuGH they’re only a week away, the Winter Olympics has been creating very little buzz compared to its 2012 summer monster, but it’s hardly surprising, the summer Olympics has always been the louder, more glamorous sibling, and there was the small matter of the games being held in London. It was always going to be a hard act to follow especially as Danny Boyle’s incredible production made him a national hero- if he wasn’t already. So, with that entire in mind, here are some interesting facts about the games, that may entice some of you to tune in to part of the 650 hours of TV coverage the games are scheduled to get. If you are unfamiliar with Russian geography, Sochi is on the Black Sea just north of Georgia and across from Turkey. It is known as the “Russian Riviera” and is a subtropical resort where the weather rarely drops below 12 degrees Celsius (53.6 Fahrenheit). With 11 new venues built for it the games have the dubious honour of being the most expensive games in history easily beating the Beijing summer games (46.5 billion dollars) costing a staggering 51bn!

In cash money, London gold medals were worth $25,000, if you get the big one at Sochi it’ll be worth $122,000. Norwegian Bjorn Daehlie is the Winter Olympian with the most medals, the cross country skier has 8 golds and 4 silvers and he’s after more. Due to the sub-tropical climate the mountainous Krasnaya Polyana will be used for any events needing hardcore snow but if even there is to warm, snow machines from Finland are standing by. The USA Bobsled team has a sled designed by BMW using advanced aerodynamic engineering. With 12 entirely new events to debut and a chance to see world class violinist and stunning beauty Vanessa Mae take to the slopes for Thailand, there’s bound to be something for everybody. The XXII Winter Olympic Games start next Friday 7th February-23rd.

He FIVe-STAR La Manga Club has been named as the best golf resort in Spain for the third successive year.

Receiving nearly 50 per cent of all votes cast, The luxury venue in Murcia, south-east Spain won the top consumer travel award, voted by readers of leading UK magazine Today’s Golfer La Manga Club has established itself as a firm favourite with visiting golfers since opening in 1972. Set in an area three times the size of Monaco, its facilities include three 18-hole championship golf courses - all of which were named in the latest list of the Top 100 Courses in Spain - and an array of other five-star sports and leisure amenities such as a 28-court tennis centre and a 2000squaremetre spa and fitness centre. It also offers the choice of a five-star hotel, four-star serviced apartments and townhouses and more than 20 bars and restaurants. La Manga Club’s director of golf Gary Silcock said: “To be recognised as Spain’s top golf resort for the third year running is an amazing achievement and a great honour. The vote results demonstrate the high regard that

La Manga Club continues to be held in by UK golfers. It is a golf and sporting institution that is loved all over Europe and our commitment to excellence is shown by the wealth of facilities that are available for guests to enjoy. The last 12 months have been very successful and there are a number of exciting additions to our golf product in 2014 which will help to further cement the position of the resort as the continent’s leading sports and leisure destination.” A regular host of high-profile professional and amateur tournaments, the resort increased its total number of golf rounds played by 20 per cent in 2013, while it provided the stage for the 2013 Spanish International Amateur Championship and was the venue for the climax to the Ecco Tour Winter Series for a fourth time. The resort also offers a wide selection of academies for boys and girls of all ages including golf, tennis, cricket, rugby, athletics, football and dance, and a range of funpacked activities in its junior club.

La Manga Is Number 1

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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the SportS SCene By Colin Kirby

Young Guns Have CD Tenerife firing With Away Win

nAKeS and ladders has nothing on life in the Segunda Division, an Ayoze Perez inspired 2-3 win at Hercules saw CD Tenerife climbing the rungs from the relegation zone to 13th and mid table. Coach Cervera made five changes to the starting line up after the painful 0-4 home defeat to Alcorcon and pink clad Tenerife flew at their Alicante opponents going 0-2 up in six minutes. Chechu took over on the right from suspended Suso and his early cross just flicked over

the bar from Ayoze’s boot. The young prospect did better next time, a cheeky back heel from Aday let him in for the opener. A corner found Carlos Ruiz with a glancing header that made it 0-2, just what had they had for the pre match meal? Of course it couldn’t be that easy, Assulin was cursing Roberto after the Tenerife goalie denied him after the half hour and the defending was slack when Portillo nipped in to pull one back before the break. A bad error by Moyano let Assulin in to score after the restart and the nerves were jangling again. It was down to Roberto again

to stop Azkorra and Tenerife were riding their luck. Chechu made way for Nano with12 minutes left and the 18 year old striker linked up well with Ayoze threading a perfect pass for him to elude two defenders and grab the winner. That’s nine goals from 20 games. This Sunday Mirandes come calling to Santa Cruz for a 5pm kick off, the home goal drought has to break but without the suspended Ros and Aridane. Maybe the squad can drive around the ring road for a few hours and try to recreate their impressive away form.

Transfer Window Scramble full House Cheer Iberostar Tenerife Defeat I T COuLD be a frantic last few hours of the January transfer window as CD Tenerife continue to wheel and deal to improve the squad. A striker or two are the priorities and the fans will want hotshot Ayoze Perez chained up in the changing room to stop admirers like Real Madrid, Arsenal, and Swansea City from tempting him away. Former defender Ayoze Diaz has come home to CD Tenerife, the La Laguna born player, now 31, last wore the white shirt 10 years

OSInG at home to Manresa 7883 was not in the script but it didn’t matter as other results ensured eighth place in the ACB by the cut off date and a place in the Copa del Rey for the first time in 26 years.

Iberostar Tenerife had called on the La Laguna fans to push them over

the line and it was a full stadium of 5,100 to see them let the game slip away late on. Quarter scores of 20-16, 23-20, 1924, and 16-23 failed to get the win but great performances all season have put the team in the knock out cup weekend in Malaga from 7 to 10 February. In the quarter final Tenerife have drawn Barcelona, a real toughie but they are hopeful of pulling off

a shock. Blagota Sekulic was, as so often, the star man with 17 points, Nico Ricotti added 15and Luke Sikma and Ricardo Uriz weighed in with 11 each. The only sour note was a leg injury that got Carles Bivia carried off but he could be back next game. The league carries on with an away game this weekend to Rio Natura Monbus.

ago and has played in the Primera with Racing, Mallorca, and Deportivo. There’s another home coming for Edgar Mendez, the 23 year old winger from Arafo has joined on loan from Almeria, via Rael Jaen, until the end of the season.Goalie Diego Rivas from Elche has joined on loan as cover for Roberto but left back Salva Ruiz is going back to parent club Valencia to find a new loan deal after the arrival of Ayoze Diaz. After that it’s down to any good late deals that can be brokered, Javi Flores of Elche, an attacking midfielder with a good goal record sounds a good fit but we will have to wait to see what loose change the club directors can find down the back of the sofa.

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Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

Defenders Dominate Battle Of The Goal Scorers

ard work and good organization were the winners over flair as CD Marino shaded the play at home to CD Tenerife B but

couldn’t get the win they needed most of the two sides. The threadbare state of the pitch did little to help as the ball bobbled around on the hard surface but Marino should have put more pressure

on visiting goalie Carlos who relied on punching the ball clear rather than catching when under threat. The division’s top scorer Jefte of Tenerife looked big and strong but was kept in check well by the home defence and Marino’s Murci, a

goal behind, also found it hard to break free of his markers. Murci tested Carlos after ten minutes with a blast from the right that he saved well and Jefte found Alberto alert to deal easily with his low shot. Just before the half hour Jefte looked to have unlocked the defence with some nifty foot work but Alberto stuck out a boot at the post to deny him. The game was hard fought with plenty of friendly digs at each other but the ref got the tone just right and let a lot go. Lamine was always looking to burst through for Marino and Josito on the left made some early headway but Tenerife

itzky Cup in Austria when the world top 10 players competed and Tom Kite won with a new course record.” Chris likes to work with individuals or small groups from beginners to advanced for the best results. “I like to be flexible, start with technique, picking out weak spots, fault finding, and dealing with cause and effect of their game,” If that sounds very technical he certainly managed to make it fun and free of pressure, Tanya was soon chipping and putting smoothly.

It’s difficult to stop Chris from singing the praises of Tenerife as a golf destination. “It’s got it all, great weather, professional people running the courses and keeping them in top condition, and amazing scenery. I normally teach at Golf Las Americas, Golf Costa Adeje, and for a smaller and easier starting point Los Palos.” Silverpoint have golf packages tailored to all levels and needs throughout the year, there’s more information at silverpointpromotionalholidays.com

Learning To Love Golf In Tenerife

he perfect place to play golf, and fast outstripping its rivals in other holiday destinations. That’s the verdict of PGA advanced professional Chris Davies, he should know after making his professional debut at the age of 15 and playing all over the world. Now passing on his knowledge through coaching, Chris spends half of the year at his

golf school at the Fontana club in Austria and from November to March he works in partnership with Silverpoint in Tenerife. I caught up with him at Golf Las Americas, his pupil Tanya, on holiday at Hollywood Mirage in Los Cristianos, was a relative newcomer but wanted to get more from a sport she enjoys. Chris did his PGA studies in the UK and took further tuition at Sports University in Salzburg. How about this for a career highlight? “I came 9th in the Vran-

captain and right back Alejandro was a cool customer and marshaled his defenders well. Aaron Darias is always adventurous from the Marino right back slot and he chanced his luck with a hard shot at goal that Carlos made a meal of covering. Adrian in midfield for Tenerife was a little terrier and Josua looked a good play maker but most of their attacks floundered on the well drilled Marino defence. At half time it already looked a banker for a goal less draw. With clear chances hard to come by the race was on at the start of the second half as a loose ball gave Amorin a sight of goal,

Alberto in the home goal was left stranded but won the battle to get to the ball first and clear the danger. Lamine hustled to make some openings for Marino, Carlos saved his first from Airam and Verdes mad a strong block on Lamine to deny him a way through. Both sides seemed to be content with a draw and it edged towards a stalemate even though Lamine had another couple of late goes, one punched away by Carlos and the other put over the bar. It’s another massive game this weekend away to leaders Atletico Granadilla.

Tenerife Weekly - 31st January 2014 - 6th February 2014

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QUICK CROSSWORD

ACROSS

1. Ship’s prison 7. Considerate 10. Idly fantasising 11. Aluminium kitchen wrap 12. Early Peruvian 13. Clumsy louts 15. In contact with

DOWN 1. Polishes 2. Stupid 3. Sports day 4. Counts up 5. African striped beast 6. Slugs 7. Join closely

Av Rafael Puig 7, Playa De Las Americas Arona ( In Front Of Hotel Tenerife Sol)

vivo.11480

17. Perched 18. Pat 20. Fish eggs 21. Glacial material 23. Perish 25. Curved doorway 26. Soiled 28. Date of offensive (1-3)

30. Expends, ... up 31. Yield 32. Knowledge test 34. Dusk to dawn 35. Deeds 37. Flavour enhancer (1,1,1) 39. Bullfight cheer 40. Space

41. Dear ... or Madam 43. Crowd in upon 45. Experiment rooms 48. Eyelid swelling 50. Blond 51. Solely 52. Calculating (8,3) 53. Tofu bean 54. Please reply (1,1,1,1)

8. Disregarded 9. Cover with cloth 14. Lawyer’s charge 16. Assent with head 18. Thin-petalled flowers 19. Beef & pork vendor 22. Pals

24. Most suitable 25. Pub drink 26. Lion’s lair 27. So far 29. Aye 33. Boost (sound) 36. Makes firm 38. Babble 39. Porridge flake

40. Donations 42. Pakistan’s neighbour 44. Purchase (entire stock) (3,2) 46. Opera solo 47. Deliberately avoid 48. Palm cereal 49. Belonging to you

Answers to the QUICK CROSSWORD are on page 2