Rewind fall 2017

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Restore, Empower, Win, Improve, Nourish and Develop Marriage WINTER 2017

?

PLAYMATE OR SOULMATE

HIS VOICE

Are You Single & Settling

LISTEN REAL RESPONSES FROM MARRIED MEN WHAT THEY WANT WOMEN TO KNOW

RETIREMENT TODAY Does it make good sense to retire at 70?

HE NO LONGER DESIRES ME A Woman Who Almost Walked Away From Her Marriage Due To a Lack of Understanding

911 MARRIAGE EMERGENCY

Readers Questions Answered

10 WAYS TO SCORE

A Touchdown In Marriage

GET THE LOOK

Fashion & Accessories For Women & Men

DATE NIGHT

WHY DO IT?



t a b l e

o f

c o n t e n t s HE NO LONGER DESIRES ME

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HIS VOICE LISTEN

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A true story of a woman who almost walked away from her marriage due to a lack of understanding. BY TAMARA HUNDLEY

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911 MARRIAGE EMERGENCY

Couples questions answered by a licensed Marriage Therapist BY MINISTER PAMELA BELL.

Real Responses From Married Men... What They Want Women To Know... BY TERRANCE HUNDLEY

18 20 23

PLAYMATE OR SOULMATE?

Are you single and settling for a playmate just to have someone, or patiently waiting, while preparing yourself for your soulmate? BY LATONYA MOORE

RETIREMENT TODAY DATE NIGHT WHY DO IT?

Does it make good sense to retire at 70? BY ZELMA ALLEN

“I Do” Cartoon BY DOMINIC JORDON, JR.

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LOVE & MARRIAGE

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BY LATONYA MOORE

10 WAYS TO SCORE A TOUCHDOWN IN MARRIAGE BY TERRANCE & TAMARA HUNDLEY

32

Crossword Puzzle

6

editor’s corner

REWIND / Fall 2017

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18 REWIND / Summer 2014


Reader’s Corner Restore, Empower, Win, Improve, Nourish and Develop Marriage

NO CHAOS ALLOWED A Practical Guide To Effective Church Administration defines and looks at the Biblical origin of church administration. It explores the characteristics of good church administrators and leaders by pointing out key qualities mandated by scripture. Additionally, it examines the issue of “Is it a church or is it a business” — and dispels the myths showing how both the spiritual and business aspects work together. Further, NO CHAOS ALLOWED emphasizes the fact that administration starts at home with anyone working in administration or leadership. If chaos is constant in an individual’s life, it does not disappear because he/she takes on a leadership role in a church. Last, but not least, this book highlights “the basics” in relation to successful church administration — offering vital suggestions on the dos and don’ts for church administrators and leaders.

ORDER TODAY AT www.amazon.com OR www.createspace.com

FALL 2017 PUBLISHER/EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Tamara Hundley tamara@uniqdesigninc.com GENERAL MANAGER Terrance Hundley ASSISTANT EDITOR LaTonya Moore MARKETING TEAM Rosalyn Hall, Derryck Fletcher CONTRIBUTING WRITERS LaTonya Moore, Zelma Allen, Terrance Hundley, Tamara Hundley, Pamela Bell and Sylvia Marion. GRAPHIC DESIGNER Tamara Hundley ILLUSTRATOR Dominic Jordon, Jr. SALES info@rewindmarriage.com FOUNDERS Terrance and Tamara Hundley COVER PHOTO

photographer — egidefoxworth

Advertising/Editorial/Business Offices to view online and support, visit:

www.rewindmarriage.com

Editorial Inquiries: Send inquiries to info@rewindmarriage.com (no phone calls please). The magazine is not responsible for unsolicited manuscripts or artwork. REWIND does not necessarily share the opinions of its authors. Editorials are solely the opinion of the contributor and not necessarily the shared opinions of REWIND. To subscribe visit www.rewindmarriage.com. Subscription Price: $18 per year. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission by REWIND is prohibited. Copyright 2013. Uniqdesign, LLC. All Rights Reserved. REWIND Magazine is a Uniqdesign Publication. REWIND (ISSN 2169-3102) is a free online publication. Subscription and fee required for printed copies.


CONTRIBUTORS

Derryck Fletcher is a radio host for Morgan State University’s (WEAA 88.9 FM) Sunday Gospel Music Show. He is a loving husband and father of three.

LaTonya Moore is an author, editor and freelance writer.

Terrance & Tamara Hundley Publishers & Contributors

Restore, Empower, Win, Improve, Nourish and Develop Marriage

Editor’s Corner Rosalyn Hall is the Owner and CEO of RMH Marketing, a Maryland-based Marketing Company.

Zelma Allen Financial Advisor, Columnist, and Realtor. Happily Married with three children.

Contrary to popular belief, changes in trends, and the ideology that marriage is a thing of the past...MARRIAGE (GOD’S WAY) STILL WORKS! Not only does it still work, but it is the only sure foundation for the family unit. Hence, our mission continues... to share information designed to build and strengthen marriages. We celebrated 21 years of marriage this past summer and have no regrets. As a matter of fact, we are still enjoying the journey. One may ask HOW?...And our answer­, without hesitation, would be a SURE FOUNDATION (Jesus Christ). Yes, like any other married couple, we have had our challenges. However, because we choose to always stand on our SURE FOUNDATION, today we are still enjoying this journey. So, we encourage you to hang in there and don’t give up on your marriage. We know we’re in an age where society says it’s okay to throw in the towel when tough times hit. Instead, choose to show others that God’s Word takes precedence over societal changes and trends. Pray, seek godly counsel/ therapy and be sure to build on the SURE FOUNDATION—Christ Jesus! May God continue to bless each of you, Terrance & Tamara Hundley We advise anyone considering marriage to seek biblical pre-marital counseling.

Sylvia Marion is a Toastmaster, Realtor and freelance writer residing in Maryland.

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REWIND / Fall 2017


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Marriage Matters

HE NO LONGER DESIRES ME!

A TRUE STORY OF A WOMAN WHO ALMOST WALKED AWAY FROM HER MARRIAGE DUE TO A LACK OF UNDERSTANDING.

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REWIND / Fall 2017


Marriage Matters

By: Tamara Hundley

“I

can’t believe after 34 years of marriage we’re going through this! My husband seems to no longer be interested in sex with me,” Karen said to her best friend Mary.

Karen continues explaining the challenges she and David currently face in their relationship. “What exactly is happening,” asked Mary. “Well, lately it seems that physically, I turn David off instead of on. We are still very close and deal with everything else like best friends, but when it comes to our sex life…it is dead,” Karen replied. She also shares with Mary that David tries, but is unable to get aroused. As a result, Karen said she feels rejected by David and often accuses him of wanting another woman — even a younger woman. David insists that Karen’s constant false accusations cause his body to shut down. He believes her behavior and the way she talks at him has caused him to mentally shut down, which also affects him physically. Conversely, Karen believes David simply is not interested anymore. As a result, Karen states that she has become bitter, frustrated and even angry. She does not know how to respond to this situation and she has allowed her emotions to control her. Mary, who experienced this same type of situation five years prior, immediately recognized the signs and began telling Karen about her experience. Mary and her husband both agreed that something was wrong, but they had not idea what was happening. After going to their doctors and being tested they discovered that their frustrations were a result of changes taking place in their bodies associated with the normal REWIND / Fall 2017

9


Marriage Matters cont. from page 8

aging process. His testosterone and her estrogen levels were changing, causing Mary’s husband to no longer be able to respond in the bedroom, even though their relationship was good. Consequently, Mary suggested checking things out physically with a doctor before jumping to other conclusions. They both were relieved to find out their issue was physical resulting from changes in his hormonal levels.

What Happens As Men Get Older? According to an article by the Mayo Clinic. As men get older, their testosterone levels gradually decline — typically about 1 percent a year after age 30 or 40. It is important to note that this change affects a man’s entire health including his muscle strength, energy levels, lean muscle mass, mood, and yes — his sex drive

“ His testosterone and her estrogen levels were changing, causing Mary’s husband to no longer be able to respond in the bedroom, even though their relationship was good .”

2. Encourage him to get his levels

tested and see if there is something physical he can do to help balance his hormones, if needed.

3. Seek Marriage Therapy/

Counseling to find out how to respond to the changes happening in his body, which have now affected your marital relationship.

Remember, acting out of ignorance could possibility ruin a great marriage. Get educated! Know your

On the contrary, Karen’s uneducated reaction to David’s cold behavior caused friction in their relationship. This was so strange to Karen because David has always found her attractive. He has always desired her in every way a man should desire his wife — including the desire for physical itimacy. After receiving information and educating themselves, Karen and David’s relationship improved tremendously. They both have a better understanding of how their bodies change with age, what to expect, and how to properly respond. They also decided to seek counseling.

10 REWIND / Fall 2017

or ability to perform. So don’t think it strange if your husband tends to have more mood swings than you as he ages — it is just part of growing older. Also, instead of allowing your emotions to take over when he seems less interested in the bedroom, consider the fact that it could be medical, based on the aging process. But don’t stop there.

Here are some suggestions:

1. Share this article with your

spouse.

spouse — spiritually and naturally.


Zelma Allen

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Sales Consultant

S. LEE MARTIN & CO.

Mobile: 443-791-3726 Office: 410-367-6500 Home: 410-323-1182

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4809 Liberty Heights Avenue Baltimore, Maryland 21207


Marriage Matters

ASK MINISTER BELL Minister Pamela Bell is a Licensed Therapist and owner of Serenity Counseling in Reisterstown, MD. She has counseled couples for more than 10 years - Married 26 years

EMERGENCY

12

REWIND / Fall 2017


Q

My wife and her ex are really close. They have been friends since childhood. I have actually met him and he comes across as a decent dude. Usually when he comes in town, she and a large group of their other friends get together and go out. However, he is coming in town and it seems that the only person available to go out with him is my wife. I have a problem with this. Should I? It would be unwise for your wife to go out alone with her ex. Even though they are good friends and their intentions may be pure, the romantic history they share makes them more vulnerable to inappropriate attraction. Proverbs 4:23 says, “Above all else guard your heart”. Your discomfort with the idea of them being alone indicates that you want to protect your marriage from unnecessary vulnerability. However, it’s important that you communicate your concerns in a way that strengthens your marriage. Avoid making accusations or demands. Tell your wife how you are feeling and why you feel that way. Explain exactly what you need in order to feel comfortable with their friendship. Pray with your wife about this situation and then let her know that you trust her to make the right decision for the marriage.

Q

My husband and I have talked about money continuously. We agreed that neither of us would make major purchases without discussing it first. Since then he has purchased a wide screen TV, a custom made suit, and recently something as frivolous as a Louis Vuitton brief case. As a result our account has been negative several times and the late fees continue to accumulate. I don’t know what else to do. Please help. Compulsive spending or shopping addiction controls many Americans. There are no campaigns or public service announcements to warn us about shopping addiction because it’s good for business, but it can be overwhelmingly stressful for a marriage. Many couples report that their marriage is full of distrust, insecurities and financial hardships because of compulsive spending. The definition of compulsive spending is a pattern of chronic, repetitive purchasing that becomes difficult to stop and ultimately results in harmful consequences. Some of the warning signs of compulsive spending connected to shopping addiction: • Your spending habits cause you or your loved one emotional distress • Arguing with others about your spending habit • Feeling insecure when you don’t have credit cards • Shopping to relieve stress • Buying items on credit that you cannot afford to buy with cash • Experiencing a rush when spending money • Feeling guilty, ashamed or disappointed with yourself after spending money • Hiding items that you bought • Lying about purchases or how much money you spent • Thinking excessively about money • Juggling accounts or bills to accommodate spending 4 or more of the above behaviors indicate a compulsive spending habit. If your husband has a problem with compulsive spending, he may not be ready to admit it. You cannot force him to change his behavior. You can help him by praying to God to set him free and increase his self control. Galatians 5:23 says that self control is fruit of the Holy Spirit. That means that spiritual intervention is essential to his recovery. He would also benefit from counseling with a qualified professional. Compulsive spending could be a sign of a deeper emotional issue. For more support on this issue try a 12 step group like Debtors Anonymous. They offer spiritual, emotional and practical support for compulsive spenders and their loved ones.

REWIND / Fall 2017

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REWIND Feature

By: Terrance Hundley

LI

These are the Voices of Married Men of different ages, races and backgrounds. This is a new column specifically designed to hear the male perspective as it pertains to marriage and family. All responses are anonymous. The purpose of this column is to share the hearts of married men and create an opportunity for better understanding and meaningful communication in marriage. THE QUESTION: As a

married man, what tip or piece of advice would you give to married women in general — something that you feel could help marriages?

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REWIND / Fall 2017


ISTEN V

VOICE 1

Men don’t often share their feelings or talk about their problems. One piece of advice I would give to wives when it come to their husbands is, when we do talk we don’t always want an answer or want you to solve our problem as much as we just want you to listen.

VOICE 2 If you have a man who is willing to work hard because he is driven to provide for his family, thank God that He blessed you with a partner that is aware of his role and assignment in the faily. When expressing your need for time and attention, be careful not to ridicule him for wanting to do what God created him to do for his family. Also, understand that sometimes silence is okay.

VOICE 3 Understand that marriage isn’t necessarily hard. What’s hard is

making one’s self small at times for the sake of your significant other. Prior to marriage, you’ve spent your life doing what you want to do. Once you get married, you must take into account what someone else wants and their feelings. So wives, consider that just because something is small to you does not mean it is not a big deal to your husband. Further, if something is important to your husband, don’t minimize it because you don’t feel the same.

Voice 4 When I think about this question, so many thoughts run through my mind. However, at the forefront of my thoughts is respect. As a married man, having the respect of my wife is huge. It is wanted and needed. I believe respect allows men to push on and do what is needed for their wives and families. The need for respect is in a man’s “make-up” and it enables him to lead as he was designed to do. A wife who truly and totally respects her husband makes a man feel loved and supported. In return the marriage and family balance can be maintained.

The next thought after respect is appreciation. Everyone wants to feel appreciated. If the man is doing everything in his power to provide, protect, and support his wife and family, saying and showing appreciation helps him maintain his focus and desire to continue.

Voice 5 Life is complicated enough. Keep your marriage simple and keep it uncomplicated. Are you doing your part to keep your marriage uncomplicated? Are you mature enough to let go of trivial stuff and toxic people who complicate your marriage? Simplify your marriage immediately and keep it simple! These voices, from men of all ages and ethnicities, speak the same message— Men don’t often share their feelings or talk about their problems. Based on the message from these voices, I offer one piece of advice to wives: When your husbands open up and talk, they don’t always want an answer or want their wives to solve their problems. In many cases they just want you to listen. REWIND / Fall 2017

15


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Restore, Empower, Win, Improve, Nourish and Develop Marriage

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PLAYMATE OR SOULMATE? Are you single and settling for a playmate just to have someone, or patiently waiting while preparing yourself for your soulmate?

By: LaTonya Moore

B

By the time this article is published, my husband and I will be approaching our 1-year anniversary. After a year of marriage, I know without question that I have married my soulmate. I also know that in the process of discovering his identity, I encountered some cheap imitations. These individuals were fun to be around, but they were not vested in the success of my soul. They were merely playmates.

For the most part I enjoyed my season of single. I dated a few guys, mostly gentlemen and one catastrophic jerk . . . I digress. There is one gentleman who stands out amongst the men I dated during my season of single. To protect his identity, let’s call him Brian. Brian was an older gentleman who was settled in his career and his family. His children were grown and were beginning to establish families of their own. His life circumstances worked out very well for me. No longer doting on his children, he spent most of his free time

18 REWIND / Fall 2017


catering to me. If I wanted something, I need only suggest an interest in it and suddenly it appeared. I would be lying if I said I did not consider milking this situation. I definitely thought about it. However, thinking about it was what made me reconsider. While we were merely dating, there was nothing to worry about. Random gifts and free dinner . . . sounds good to me. He was attempting to win me, and I was perfectly willing to let him do all he thought was necessary to do so. The problem is I am not a cold-hearted woman. A person cannot continue to lavish me with love and I not feel a need to respond. I wanted to respond with love and appreciation. I got the appreciation down (cook dinner, treat to an ice cream cone), but love was something else. I kept searching for a reason to love him, but every reason was superficial. Having a superficial relationship is possible, but it is not healthy. Eventually, when those superficial demands are not met, someone is going to be left wanting and the other left

feeling used. Life had already taught me this and I wasn’t willing to sacrifice my identity to learn it again. Consequently, I took a moment of pause to take inventory – self inventory. Taking self-inventory is one way to check-in on your process of becoming. This moment of self-reflection and taking of personal inventory caused me to consider my purpose and identity. I had to ask if being with Brian was going to further my purpose or agree with my God-given identity. These two things are something only a soulmate can do. Playmates make you feel good, but soulmates help you become. After taking inventory, I had a decision to make. Would I sacrifice my identity and purpose on the altar of superficiality? Would I allow comfort to convince me to abandon my call? Would I allow fear to cause my faith to fail? I took inventory of my identity and Brian simply did not stack up; therefore, we had to break up.

I think it is important to be clear. I did not break up with Brian because there was someone else standing in the wings. I broke up with him purely because he was not in alignment with the forward progression of my soul. Once we broke up I was single for a good year before my husband and I started dating. Here’s the point: sometimes being fully single is one of the best states in which to be. There you can learn more about you and how your gifts work. This connection with God and self makes playmates less tolerable and brings HE -T F new meaning to the statement, “I’ll let nothing separate -O P THE TO E IN G me from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus.” RANGE EN

THE DELIVERS ALL EED, N way God demonstrates His love towards us is by POWER YOU One . identity and purpose. We reciprocate ITour EED us WHEN YOU Ngiving U YOby living out the identity and purpose He has ES love ALWAYS LEAVthat E. Soulmates don’t subtract from our ability to R O us. WANTING Mgiven

reciprocate God’s love, they make it impossible for us not to. They push us to purpose and strengthen our resolve to carry out the will of God for our lives. They don’t view God’s will as something with which they must compete; instead they see it’s accomplishment as a testament to the success of the marriage. Today, I gratefully stand beside my soulmate reaping the benefits of a shared perspective on ministry, relationship, call, and purpose. The depth of our connection is one I would not trade. You can keep your playmates. My Soulmate and I have purpose to fulfill.

REWIND / Fall 2017

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Finance

20 REWIND / Winter 2017


RETIREMENT TODAY DOES IT MAKE GOOD SENSE TO RETIRE AT 70? After a lifetime of hard work, raising kids, sweating out bills, and building a secure life, married couples dream of enjoying their golden years with fun and leisure. By: Zelma Allen

H

However, retirement can also be a time of financial difficulties compounded by illness and loneliness. That may be an overly harsh view, but married couples should prepare for the worst while hoping for the best. One way to do so is by arranging for each other’s retirement security as early as possible. Starting early coupled with ending late could ensure married couples have the retirement of their dreams. Therefore, I would recommend couples work until they each turn 70. Working longer means they’ll draw less from their retirement

savings and delay collecting Social Security Benefits. The more years they put in their jobs, the more money they can put away for their eventual retirement. The additional funds remove more and more financial worry and (in the case of death) leave more for the surviving spouse. The logic behind delaying full retirement is clear. The longer money remains invested the more time it has to work and grow. Additionally, the acquisition of additional paychecks reduces the amount of time they have to spend money in retirement. Sure, there may be a few vacations here and there, but working drastically reduces the temptation to spend frivolously. There is an added benefit to waiting until 70 to retire. If the couple

can delay collecting their Social Security Benefits until after they reach full retirement age, they will get an additional 8% more each year between their full retirement age and 70. This fact alone makes waiting until 70 to retire a great financial decision. After all, the bigger the monthly check, the less supplemental income is needed to survive. Waiting until 70 to retire has benefits beyond a monthly check. Waiting extends employee benefits like health insurance. Employer based group health insurance coverage has a much lower cost than insurance obtained by older individuals. The exorbitant cost of health care can cripple the financial stability of those who have retired. Therefore, the longer they can wait to retire the better. Further, REWIND / Fall 2017

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Finance

cont. from page 21

some employers may also offer special incentives for older workers to continue working such as stock options or other financial incentives. The incentives are based on expertise; therefore, aim to be the absolute best. When it comes to working there is more to it than just financial benefits. Most people who work beyond their retirement age cite a sense of accomplishment and increased wellbeing from continuing to work. Some couples who retired earlier fell into a state of depression because they felt

of placing all bonuses, cash awards, raises and any monetary gifts into a retirement savings account. Delaying the enjoyment of current bonuses will only increase the value of that bonus – making the golden years even more pleasurable. Another savings trick with a quick return is downsizing. Couples who are finished rearing children can rapidly reduce expenses by trading their four bedroom homes for two bedroom condos. Not only will they be able to use the equity from their previous

Most people who work beyond their retirement age cite a sense of accomplishment and increased wellbeing from continuing to work. useless. Not knowing what to do with their free time these couples also had a hard time adjusting to their new reality with each other. Conversely, couples who continued to work avoided many of these issues. As we get older our minds start to suffer. The less active our minds are, the more they will deteriorate. Staying employed longer will keep our minds sharp, while keeping us healthy and fit. However, if a married couple is determined to retire at 65 they should immediately begin to curb their expenses and save more. An easy way to start saving more money is to immediately begin the habit

22 REWIND / Fall 2017

home to support their lifestyle, they will save thousands of dollars yearly on maintenance, and utility fees. While it is not an ideal situation for some people, downsizing a home in retirement can go a long way in increasing the amount you can save. Knowing retirement is more securely funded makes for much better sleep at night. Therefore, get a clear financial picture and make more definitive plans to enjoy a full retirement. And the Lord spake unto Moses, saying, This is it that belongeth unto the Levites: from twenty and five years old and upward

they shall go in to wait upon the service of the tabernacle of the congregation: And from the age of fifty years they shall cease waiting upon the service thereof, and shall serve no more: But shall minister with their brethren in the tabernacle of the congregation, to keep the charge, and shall do no service. Thus shalt thou do unto the Levites touching their charge. Numbers 8:23-26 Now Joshua was old and stricken in years; and the Lord said unto him, Thou art old and stricken in years, and there remaineth yet very much land to be possessed. Joshua 13:1 And it came to pass, that, as soon as the days of his ministration were accomplished, he departed to his own house. Luke 1:23KJV


s k r o W e g KEEP IT ria

Mar

Spontaneous

MARRIAGE CARTOON BY DOM


BY: LaTonya Moore

20 / Winter 2017 24REWIND REWIND / Fall 2017


D

Dating is an opportunity to reconnect and to enjoy each other’s company. It can also be a time to have some real fun and discover something new. It is for the latter reason that I recommend R. House as a date choice. This urban food hall in the middle of Baltimore City has a wide variety of food for very reasonable prices. There are ten static restaurants (Ground and Griddle, Stall 11, ARBA, BeBim, BDR, White Envelope, BLK Sugar & Little Baby’s Ice Cream, Hilo, Amano Taco, and r. bar) and a rotating pop-up. The selection of food makes this a great location for a double date, a date with two people who have very different tastes, or a date where you can order two very different things and both enjoy sampling from one another’s plates. I have had the opportunity to enjoy the food from Hilo, ARBA and Amano Taco. Of the three, I’ve been disappointed by none. Hilo brings Hawaii to Baltimore with poke bowls and sushi. It is not necessary to be

a sushi connoisseur to enjoy a good California Roll in which the main ingredient is imitation crab sticks. The ‘C’ class of sushi, California rolls are a great entry point to the world of sushi or a new sushi location. Hilo’s California Rolls are the best I have ever had. They do not skimp on quantity or quality. You’ll love them. I’m definitely going back to try one their poke bowls. There is not much about Greek food I do not enjoy. It is something about the tanginess of its sauces combined with mild and flavorful feta cheese. ARBA does Mediterranean cuisine right. There I enjoyed the most delicious lamb burger ever. It was cooked medium well – the perfect temperature to enjoy lamb and all of its complexities. You can get it on a bed of greens, over rice, or wrapped in pita bread. I enjoyed it wrapped in pita and was hooked from the first bite. This is something you have to taste to believe. Again, they skimped on nothing – there was plenty of meat, lettuce, sauces, onions, and the most flavorful feta cheese! Finally, there is Amano Taco. Don’t let the name fool you. They offer bowls as

well transforming a taco into a rice dish or a salad. I opted for a shrimp taco over salad. I approached Amano Taco thinking I was going to have a highend Chipolte experience. This was so much more than that. Instead of food which tasted like an American version of Mexican cuisine, these flavors were authentically Mexican and my taste buds danced with every bite. As if I were suddenly teleported to my favorite vacation destination, I literally had to slow down and enjoy this meal. For the next few minutes there was nowhere for me to be, but in R. House eating this salad. There were so many flavor notes in this one dish, that it’s difficult to truly describe it. However, the abundance of flavors was not overpowering. Instead, they were balanced and seemed to tell a story you had to slow down to hear – so that’s what I did. R. House has extensive operating hours. This makes this a great date spot for breakfast, brunch, lunch and dinner, or even after a late night show. Check them out for your next date. You will be glad you did.

REWIND / Fall 2017

25


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3

EXPECT FUMBLES

Like the game, there will be good plays, but there will also be times when your spouse will fumble the ball during the game. Don’t panic...remember there will be another play or even another game. Learn from the fumble and move on.

1

4 BE A TEAM PLAYER

Like football, Marriage is a team effort. Never lose sight of the fact that you both are on the same team. Don’t fight against each other.

2

KNOW YOUR TEAMMATE

In football, players know their teammates. Continually get to know your spouse. Understand his/her strengths and weakenesses and strategically make plays that they can handle.

32 REWIND / Winter 2017

FOCUS ON THE GOAL LINE

During the game, your goal line may appear to be getting further and further away, due to penalties and set backs. The life goals that the two of you set together may seem to be way off in the distance. Just remained focused and keep your eyes on the goal line. Don’t allow the flags, 5-yard penalties or inteceptions cause you to give up hope or quit. If you don’t reach the goal today...the game continues tomorrow.


5

PLAY YOUR POSITION

6

HUDDLE UP!

As a team member, play your position. Football has wide receivers, running backs, kickers, etc. No matter what the role, each position is just as important as the other. The team can’t win the game without the players. For instance, the kicker only steps in when it is time to punt or kick a field goal and may only be in the game for a few minutes— but the role is vital for the team to play/win. As such, in marriage, roles of boh the husband and the wife are vital for the win.

During the game, players must huddle to receive instructions to execute the next play. In marriage, couples must do the same. Pause in the middle of everything to regroup, strategize and execute the next move.

7

KNOW WHEN TO PLAY OFFENCE AND WHEN TO PLAY DEFENSE

Don’t lose sight of the fact that you have an opponent. Just like the game of football, couples must know when to play offense and when to play defense. ..And ALWAYS play together.

8

REVIEW THE PLAYS

9

CELEBRATE THE WINS

Players review the plays from previous games— both wins and losses.. Likewise in marriage, take time to review your failures and your victories for the purpose of learning. Don’t repeat the plays that caused pain, disappointment andstrife in your marriage. Rather, learn from the strategies you used to gain victories and continue to apply them daily.

Win or Lose, remain a team and ALWAYS celebrate the wins. Life brings all kinds of challenges to marriages. Instead of focusing on the losses, go all out celebrating the victories. Learn from the mistakes, but Celebrate the WINS.

10

TOUCH DOWN!!!

REMEMBER - you have a coach — JESUS CHRIST. He is your rock and your foundation. Nothing else matters, if He is not at the center of your marriage. Read and study the Bible together... Pray...Love and WIN!

REWIND / Fall 2017 33


LOVE & MARRIAGE Winter’s Fun

34 REWIND / Winter 2017


REWIND / Fall 2017 35


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