Cathedral Times - August 1, 2021

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The CATHEDRAL TIMES The weekly newsletter of the Cathedral of St. Philip · Serving Atlanta and the World · August 1, 2021

LEARNING TO SAY “NO,” SO YOU CAN SAY “YES” By Keith Dumke, Director of Youth and Young Adult Ministries After being involved in youth ministry for more than 15 years, I know one thing for certain: our youth are the busiest, most over-scheduled people I know. Many adults also have such jam-packed schedules that we end up exhausted and wondering how we can get everything done that needs to be done. So, I have a suggestion for how we all can fulfill our obligations: decide to have fewer obligations. While the pandemic has resulted in life-changing and undesirable effects for some, I’ve been thinking about one positive result for others: having time and motivation to truly consider the paths of our lives. Many of us had the time to reflect on what is of most value to us – as individuals and as a community. For many, being in quarantine revealed just how over-committed we had become. In the past year, the subject of self-care took on a whole new meaning, and it seemed like people everywhere were talking about it. I am one of those individuals who was habitually over-committed, and I worked diligently in recent years to learn how to say no. It was, quite frankly, difficult to learn how to do this. However, I began to see that when a commitment feels wrong in my gut and in my soul, saying no is what’s best for not only me, but the other parties involved. I learned that there is no reason to make excuses or over-explain my decisions. Once I began saying no sometimes, I began to see new opportunities to serve God and my community suddenly present themselves. Perhaps they were there all along, and the background noise of my habitual busyness was drowning them out. I urge everyone to recognize when it is time to not only say no when something feels wrong, but also to step away from current commitments that no longer feed us. I’ll admit, it is not always easy to step away. But as faithful people, we may find ourselves unable to open our hearts and hands to accept new opportunities and gifts from God if we are overbooked with other things that no longer fulfill us. When we won’t say no, we may ultimately be cheating ourselves out of true joy, purpose, and fulfillment. Recently I have been drawn to Ecclesiastes 3:1-7: “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak.” This piece of scripture seems to be telling us that everything has a beginning and yes, an end – and that is okay! There seems to be a great mystery in the air as we emerge from this pandemic into something new or perhaps something familiar that we can approach in a new way. We are heading into the fall season and a new program year in the church. What will be different from previous years? What is ready for a new approach? Take some time to be silent with God; to listen to God’s still, quiet voice. Is God revealing to you a new passion, a new skill, a new relationship, a new opportunity? Do you need time to rest, reflect, pray, be silent, love yourself ? Take time to ask ourselves: • • • •

What are my priorities, for me and my family? Are our commitments serving this purpose? Is God calling me to serve and use my gifts in a new way? What can I do differently to help build the kingdom of God in my life, in my home, and in my community? What do I need to say no to, so I am able to say yes to something new?

I pray that we can discern exactly when to say no, so that we can say yes to all God is working in us to reveal.


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