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Mobile Phone Jail Cell: £7.20 Amazon.co.uk
Donald Trump Corkscrew: £19.44 ebay.com
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THIS is the gift that every student needs. If your flat mate can’t stop looking at their phone during dinner time then just lock them away in a small jail cell for mobile phones. It’s also great if you’re a student and you can’t study because it’s ‘essential’ for you to scroll through your Instagram feed every two minutes. Students will pass their exams, no more re-sits so more time to spend on your phone. It’s a win-win situation. You can buy this off Amazon for just £7.20; it’s a gift that will ensure both laughter and tears. Mainly tears, though.
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Voodoo Doll: £3.99 findmeagift.co.uk
WHAT was once the domain of black magic practitioners and that kid out of an Indiana Jones movie can now be yours to savour and abuse. Flat mate ‘forgotten’ to do the dishes again? Boyfriend ‘lost’ his phone while on a night out with mates? Dish out the kind of justice
Rude Hand Gestures of the World Book: £9.99 prezzybox.com
LOVE alcohol but hate Donald Trump? Then this is the perfect present for Christmas. The next time you see the President of the USA on TV yelling about fake news and how much he hates immigrants just take out your frustration using the corkscrew on a good bottle of wine to help you forget that there is a tangerine running the White House. The perfect gift for any liberal, progressive thinking person in your orbit.
these hideous crimes deserve by plunging tiny little pins into a doll in the place which causes absolutely no pain for your victim but ensures maximum pleasure for you. Chronic flatulence is, however, unforgivable and deserving of a more serious punishment.
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LOOKING to offend innocent passers-by in Salt Lake City or ask for sex in the Middle East? Then this is the very book for you. Romana Lefevre provides the tools for causing outrage in Khartoum or hand-signing a mortal insult to a bewildered Ukranian labourer. There’s more to rudeness than the classic two-fingered salute, and this book includes the pictures to prove it.
12 Selfie Toaster: $95 burntimpressions.com
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IF you are a narcissist or know any self-proclaimed egomaniacs, then this one’s for you. Or them. This is a custom toaster that is specially designed to imprint a photo of yourself or somebody you know on every slice of bread you toast. The next time you get into an argument with a sibling/partner/parent etc, instead of throwing punches just get their face toasted on the next slice of bread you are going to eat. The results are just as satisfying but less likely to leave you feeling peckish.