Hans and Gretel
Once upon a time in a town called Tervuren, there lived two children- Hans and Gretel and their father Franco.
Before Halloween Hans asked his father if he and Gretel could go trick and treating for Halloween. Their dad shouted at Hans and told Hans that his name was FRANCO and the boy didn’t have to dress up for Halloween because he was scary enough. Franco added that Gretel could go and he asked Gretel to look after her stupid brother. He told them to come home before dark.
Gretel agreed to go and added that she would dress up like a witch.
She said, “I love you, Dad!”
Franco answered, “I love you too!”
Hansel started saying, “I lov…” but his father shouted at him to shut up.
The children walked out of the door and started their exciting journey of going to houses to get some free candies.
Gretel was anxious and said that she was so excited. Then they noticed a weird building. Hansel suggested going to the house because that looked cool. The kids approached a big dark house and rang the doorbell. But… it was quiet and no one was opening the door….
Hansel said hello politely and asked if there was someone inside. Gretel invited Hansel to go in because the house looked creepy. Hansel said no and added that the house looked like it had come out of a movie.
Gretel agreed and said that was the reason to enter the house. She asked Hans if he hadn’t
learned anything from movies and said that there was always a kind of killer clown type of monster living there.
Hans agreed.
But just when they were about to go, the door opened with a creaking sound and a tall man walked out. The kids turned around.
Hansel shouted, “Trick or treat!”
Gretel said, “Looks terrified.”
This was Alberto. He turned to the kids and said that he had some candies for them. He invited the kids to the house. Hansel was excited and suggested going inside.
But Gretel said, “No, No. No way! That man looks like a crackhead! He’ll just give some ecstasy instead of candies!”
Hansel asked her how she even knew what ecstasy was. Gretel replied, “How do YOU know?”
Hansel started laughing and asked her not to be such a pussy. He said that she watched too many movies. And again he suggested going inside.
Gretel apologized and said that he was probably right.
And then Alberto introduced himself.
Hansel and Gretel walked inside with Alberto and came right into a big room with a huge table in the middle of the room. On the table there was a big basket with all sorts of candies in it. The kids looked astonished. Hansel said,” Wow!” He asked Gretel if she could see the basket full of candies.
Gretel was “surprised” and said that she hadn’t noticed. Hansel asked why she was bullying him. But then Alberto asked the kids to go to the basket and take as much as they wanted.
The kids started eating the candies till they almost puked. They were so happy and thanked Alberto and went to the door to walk outside… But the door was locked.
Gretel was confused and asked Alberto to open the door. Hansel asked Gretel to wait and took a look inside. But Gretel felt that something was wrong. She also started to feel dizzy. Hansel asked the girl not to bitch over everything and wait a
second because he thought that it was probably in her head.
Hansel walked inside and everything was still quiet… Maybe a bit too quiet….
Then Gretel called for Hansel. But there was no response… Gretel started freaking out and tried to get out of the house. Suddenly she heard something behind her. It was Alberto who asked Gretel what the problem was and why she was so stressed. Gretel answered that it was because of him. She wanted to know where her brother was and what he had done to him.
Alberto was surprised and told her that Hansel had been a bit tired so he had put the boy in bed so he could sleep. Gretel was terrified and asked what he had given to him because Hansel hadn’t been tired at all when they were together.
Alberto answered, “Oh, well you know, if you put two grams of hash in the candy, and you are someone who eats as much as Hansel, then you feel tired very quickly.”
Gretel shouted, “You crackhead! Why would you even do that to us?”
Alberto explained that kids were so valuable, especially if someone sold them to mafia on the black market… Gretel told him that he was a psychopath. Alberto smiled and said that some people called him a psychopath but he would call himself a smart and handsome guy.
Gretel, who didn’t know what to do or say and was scared by Alberto, just kept standing in front of the door. Alberto told her that he would keep on giving her brother drugs and she would farm them to him. And then Alberto took the arm of Gretel and pulled her towards his weed plantation.
In the weed plantation Alberto showed everything to Gretel and said that she would farm weed for him till the mafia offered enough money to buy her brother. Gretel agreed but asked him if he would let her go afterwards. Alberto declined and stated that this would be the girl’s life until she died.
Days went by and Gretel had an amazing idea. One morning Alberto had just woken up….. Gretel invited Alberto to have a cup of coffee since she had woken up before him. Alberto was really flattered. Alberto drank the coffee and Gretel started working again. A few minutes went by and Gretel came back to the kitchen. But there was something wrong with Alberto.
The man asked her what she had done with him because he was feeling so sick and dizzy.
Gretel said that she knew and added that it was not nice to have 50 grams of weed in his coffee.
Alberto called her a bitch but Gretel answered that some people called her a bitch but she liked to call herself a smart and cute girl.
Alberto passed out and Gretel sprinted towards the room of Hansel and freed him. They looked for the key and ran outside.
Hansel wanted to know how they would get home because he didn’t recognize the area.
Gretel recommended calling an Uber. Hansel said that it was a good idea and asked Gretel for a phone. Gretel gave him a phone and Hansel started calling the Uber.
Marcella from Uber answered the phone call.
Marcella said, “Hello, this is Marcella. Where can I come and pick you up?”
Hansel asked if she knew a dark creepy house in Tervuren. Marcella knew and said that it was of her crazy psychopathic brother Alberto’s.
She wanted to know what he was doing there.
Hansel said that it didn’t matter and asked if she could come and pick them up. Marcella agreed and promised to be there in five minutes.
Five minutes went by and there was a big pink Fiat Multipla that arrived.
Marcella greeted the kids and asked them to come in the car. Hansel and Gretel ran to the car and Marcella started the car. She turned to the guys and asked how they had got there. Hansel answered that they had been going around for Halloween and had wanted to get some candies.
Marcella didn’t understand why they had been near the house of her psychotic brother. Gretel explained that Hansel had thought that the house looked cool. Marcella asked Gretel what her brother’s name was.
Gretel said, ”Hansel...”
Marcella answered, “Hansel, you are stupid.”
Gretel added, “See, Hansel, that’s why dad hates you.”
Marcella nodded and said, “Exactly, Hansel.”
Hansel was crying till they reached home. Then the kids thanked Marcella and said goodbye. The two kids walked on their driveway and lived happily ever after.