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Estate executors perform multiple roles for the deceased’s estate. These roles include but are not limited to:
• Deciding if probate is necessary given the estate status.
• Entering the will of the deceased into the probate court.
• Identifying, locating, securing and listing the assets and property of the deceased, including making insurance arrangements.
• Notifying insurance companies of the death and providing copies of the death certificate to initiate payments to beneficiaries.
• Notifying non-insurance agencies or companies of the death in writing and, if necessary, terminating accounts. This can include the Social Security Administration, Medicare, United States Postal Service, and the United States Department of Treasury.
• Notifying creditors and heirs of the death in writing, including a newspaper announcement.
• Examining the existence of
partnerships and similar agreements, and taking steps to meet clauses related to the estate within those agreements.
• Providing tax information for the estate to a qualified lawyer or accountant by filing deadlines, applying for an Employer Identification Number (EIN) for the estate, and paying all taxes owed on the estate.
• Creating a list of all debts against the estate, including the funeral costs, and submitting the list to the court.
• Paying all debts and dispersing property and assets to heirs and creditors according to the will of the deceased and current property law. In order to accomplish this, it may be necessary to sell the deceased’s property or assets.
• Appearing in court as a representative of the estate if proceedings are necessary regarding the deceased’s will.
• Establishing a bank account in the name of the estate for distribution of property and assets.
• Keeping records of all matters relating to the settling of the estate for possible review by the probate court, heirs and creditors.
• Responding to information requests by creditors, heirs, attorneys and officers of the court.
• Making arrangements for minor children of the deceased.
An executor has a fiduciary duty to the deceased. This means that they have to act in the best interest of the deceased at all times. This sometimes pits the executor against friends and family members of the deceased if the deceased’s wishes were contrary to what friends and family members want.
Fiduciary duty also means that the estate executor cannot benefit from his work beyond what is allowed in the deceased’s will or state estate executor fee law.
Estate executors also take on legal responsibilities when they handle an estate. For example, they can be held liable for any taxes not paid related to the estate. Additionally, being an executor takes considerable time and effort—it is not unusual for it to take a year or more to close an estate.
Executors may have to deal with irate family, friends and creditors of the deceased as well.
It is legal for an estate executor to charge a fee for their services, given the extent of responsibility the executor accepts. The state typically sets the fee, but roughly three percent of the value of the estate is standard. Courts have the right to determine what is reasonable compensation for acting as executor if state law does not specify a fee limit numerically. Individuals also may specify in their wills how much they want their executors to receive if they feel the executor deserves more than the state guideline.
Taking on the responsibility of being an executor is a lasting way to honor the final wishes of someone who has passed away. It’s also a lot of hard work. Be sure you are prepared to undertake these duties before agreeing to be the executor of an estate.
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In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Dona Kay Reid (McCarthy) 1957-2024
El Cajon, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Janet Anderson 1927-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Varda Peller Backus, M.D. 1931-2024
La Jolla, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Lewis Achen 1925-2024 Sacramento, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Joseph S. Annino 1933-2024 La Jolla, CA
Christine Marie Bahen 1949-2024
Eileen Barron 1931-2024
La Jolla, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Rodney Darrel Black 1969-2024
Chula Vista, CA
Memory
John Dominick Alessio 1969-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Tom Aranda, Sr. 2024 El Cajon, CA
William B. Alexander 1933-2011
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Myrna Naegle Armstrong 1935-2024
La Jolla, CA
Barbara A. Anderson 1940-2024
Point Loma, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Anthony Daniel Attanasio 1939-2024
San Diego, CA
Escondido, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Barbara Cowles Bartosik 2024 Pacific Beach, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Elizabeth Thornbury Blunt 1944-2024
La Jolla, CA
Elizabeth Appel Bailey 1940-2024 Vista, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Deborah Benson 1952-2024 Ramona, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Karen Lynn Gibson 1963-1987 San Diego, CA
Preston Ross Bankhead 1937-2024 Jamul, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Shirley Gordon Berryman 1923-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Vieno ‘Vicky’ Bradshaw 1931-2024
Rancho Bernardo, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Helen Louise Barnhart 1942-2024 El Cajon, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Virginia “Ginger” Black 1929-2024
Chula Vista, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Dale Keith Brewer 1957-2024
Escondido, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Patricia May Brotherton Brill 1934-2024
Oceanside, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
June Myra Bush 1937-2024
Carlsbad, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Joseph Castagnola 1928-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Jeffrey Broido 1934-2024
La Jolla, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Julia (Judy) Mathewson Butsko 1936-2024
El Cajon, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Ernestine “Tina” Cerda 1943-2024
Leila Champ 1928-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Jerry Fred Brooksher 1946-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Jo Anne Hendrickson 1943-2024
Paul Cortez Combs, Jr. 1943-2024
Richmond, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Mark Cooper Bunting 1961-2024
Dolores “Dee” Thielbar Cabana 1930-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Juan A. Cetina 1934-2024
Ramonda, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Mark Conrad 2024
Ramona, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Ella Jane Carnahan 1931-2024
Ramona, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Susan Adler Channick 1943-2024
Walnut Creek, CA
Philip F. Buran 1930-2024
El Cajon, CA
La Jolla, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Marian Casazza 1948-2024
Del Mar, CA
Huntington Beach, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Robert Gage Carr 1951-2024
San Diego, CA
Joseph S Chalmers 1938-2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Brown Pickering Clark 1943-2024
Tucson, AZ
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Janet Lea Convery 1934-2024
La Jolla, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Ruth Gunther 1919-2024
Solana Beach, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Brian Charles Coll, Sr. 1940-2024
Sonoma, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Susan Kelly Crafton 1947-2024
San Diego, CA
David Crawford 1931-2024
Carlsbad, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Harry W. Crosby 1926-2024
San Diego, CA
John Dee 1925-2024 Ramona, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Caroline F. Dooley 1958-2024
Carlsbad, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
David Edward Dyas 1932-2024
San Diego, CA
Kathleen D. Fahey 1951-2024
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Serita Degracia 1929-2024
Mesa, CA
Barbara Doren 1940-2024 Chandler, AZ
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Magdalena “Maggie” Elfalan 1928-2024
San Diego, CA
Frederick P. Crowell 1931 - 2024 La Jolla, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Ronald William Delaney 1934-2024
CA
Dr. Joseph B. Duckworth 1936 - 2024 San Diego, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Georgia Ellis 1944-2024
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Thelma Ruth Curry 1931-2024
San Diego, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Thomas William Delaney 1944-2024 San Diego, CA
Coronado, CA
Steven A Deal 1952-2024
San Diego, CA
Vickie Durham 1937-2024 San Diego, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Janice Louise Emery 1934-2024 La Jolla, CA
Silvija K. Devine 1941-2024
Rancho Santa Fe, CA
Joseph Duris 2024 Poway, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Dallas J. Evans 1935-2024
San Diego, CA
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Mary Ellen Fleischli 1937-2024
La Jolla, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Darrell Dean Fanestil 1933-2024
La Jolla, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Jan Denise Fuchs (photo) 1943-2024 San Diego, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Deborah Green Farrior 1951-2019
San Diego, CA
When you have a limited liability company that owns assets, such as investment
real estate, it provides you with personal liability protection but often doesn’t have any estate planning benefits. A living trust enables you to pass assets to your heirs immediately, outside of probate, but doesn’t provide any personal liability protection. To gain the liability protection of an LLC and the estate planning benefits of a living trust, consider making your living trust the sole member of your LLC.
When you put assets into a revocable living trust, the assets pass directly to your heirs when you die without going through probate court. This eliminates the delays associated with supervision from a probate judge and prevents public disclosure of the transaction. It’s also usually less expensive than probate court. While you’re alive, you can add assets to the trust, remove assets from the trust and control the current assets as the trustee.
When you form a company to hold assets, you must typically choose to organize it as a corporation, a partnership or a limited liability company. A corporation provides personal liability protection if someone wins a judgment against the company, but the government taxes you twice. A partnership eliminates double- taxation, but doesn’t provide personal liability protection to the general partner. A limited liability company, however, combines the liability protection of a corporation and the single taxation of a partnership in a single entity. When you die, however, your LLC ownership must pass to your heirs through a probate in many states.
While the rules regarding LLCs vary by state, most states don’t require more than one member to form an LLC. A member can be a person or an entity such as
a corporation, a partnership, another LLC, a foreign entity or a trust. The company’s operating agreement specifies who is responsible for making decisions and commitments on behalf of the company. If an LLC is member-managed, the members are responsible for running the company. It the company is managermanaged, the members appoint a manager with responsibility for company operations. An LLC can be manager-managed, with the single member of the LLC serving as the manager.
By making a living trust the sole member of an LLC,
the living trust becomes the owner of the company. If the company is member-managed, the trustee is responsible for running the company. If it’s managermanaged, the manager runs the company but the trustee can usually replace the manager at any time, depending on the provisions in the company’s operating agreement. When you die, company ownership passes to the trust’s beneficiaries without a probate, and your heirs also inherit personal liability protection as the new owners of the LLC and its assets. -
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Veronica “Ronnie” Feehan 1947-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Willis (Will) Forman 1924-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Nephi “Jacob” Herrick 1992-2024 Sacramento, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Jean ‘Geno’ Hahn 1961-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Robert C. (Bobby) Hartman Jr. 1970-2024
Encinitas, CA
Memory
Patricia Ann Fernandez 1934-2024
Oceanside, CA
Betsey Marek Frankel 1921-2024
El Cajon, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Lily Mae Good 1931-2024 Lemon Grove, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Judy Corey Haines 1940-2024
Memory
Robert Thomas Ferrez, Jr. 1935-2024
San Diego, CA
Suzanne H. Fink 1938-2024
Inocencia Arriola Gamboa 1925-2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Katherine Greco 1927-2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Barbara Hartung 2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
John Phillip Fitzpatrick 1944-2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Lea Haley 1925-2024
San Diego, CA
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Charles Haugh 1959-2024
La Quinta, CA
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Renee Craven Gokenbach 1935-2024
John Brittain Griffiths 1937-2024 La Jolla, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Judy K. Hanson 1944-2024
Oceanside, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Carlos A. Gonzales 1936-2024 San Diego, CA
Diane Hagen 1953-2024
Encinitas, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Carole Meisner Hertz 1932-2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Escondido, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Thomas D. Harpley, Ph.D 1948-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Norman Hibser 1944-2024
Jacksonville, OR
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Joanne Bovee Hickey 1930-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
George E. Hurley, Jr. 1943-2024
Chula Vista, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Margaret Jennings 1929-2024
Chula Vista, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Lynn Hopewell 1951-2024
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Loreen Holt 1933-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Kathy Ireland 1938-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Ramona, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Barbara Louise Holt 1942-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Richard ‘Dick’ Ivey 1930-2024
Susan Maile Jewell 2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
William “Bill” Paul Kidder 1954-2024
Milton Kodmur 1924-2024
La Jolla, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Geraldine Diana Holton 1930-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Kimberly Johnson 1956-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Karen Houghton 2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Claudia “OB Claudia” Peters Jack 1945-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Rosemary Cincotta Kiely 1932-2024
San Marcos, CA
La Jolla, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
John Kortlang 1947-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Thelma Mae Jones 1942-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Dr. Robert Eric King Jr. 1928-2024
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Cary William Hulstine 1965-2024
Carlsbad, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Lawrence Jaffe 1941-2024 San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Meridian, ID
Valley Center, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Gray Lafrenz Kristofferson 1946-2024
La Jolla, CA
Lionel ‘Lyle’ Kalish III 1944-2024 La Jolla, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Hannah Marie Kinney (Armanino) 1939-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Peter Lalli 1949-2024
San Diego, CA
Michael Bruce Lambert 1952-2024
Spokane, WA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
David Wood Lamott 1935-2024
San Diego, CA
Charles Howard League 1935-2024
Frances V. (Muggins) Lewis 1929-2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
George Nicholas Mansolf 1983-2024
San Diego, CA
Samuel N. Matsumoto 1931-2024
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
JR “Lucky” Lidster 1928-2024
County, VA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Herbert D. & Suzanne M. Marbach 7/16/1905 Fallbrook, CA
Escondido, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Dr. Louie Gene Linarelli 1938-2004
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Gordon (Randy) Martin, Jr. 1952-2024
CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Linda Sue Ledesma 1948-2024 Vista, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Steven N. Linton 1950-2024 San Diego, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Marion Leslie 1923-2024 Imperial Beach, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
David Matthew Lowe 1948-2024 San Diego, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Gayle Martin 2024 La Jolla, CA
Richard Matheron 1927-2024 Escondido, CA
Solana Beach, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Brian McCarthy 1932-2024
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Grace Mary Maunu 1931-2024 Ramona, CA
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Janet Audine (Polley) McCoy 1930-2023 Poway, CA
Melvin G. Mayuiers 1937-2024 San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Dan McDuffee 1947-2024 Oceanside, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Thomas Davis McBride 1922-2024 San Diego, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Dennis Thomas McKee 1932-2024 Carlsbad, CA
Marjorie Ann McBride 1926-2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Mary Jo Meyer 1946-2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Marilyn Miles 1937-2024
Houston, TX
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
John R. Morse
1940-2024
Del Mar, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Piret Munger 2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Charles Robert Newcomb 1948-2024
Carlsbad, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Brahm Prasad 1937-2024
San Marcos, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Sylvia Moore 1930-2024
Escondido, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Lynn Ronald McDougal 1932-2024 El Cajon, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
David G. Moore 1925-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Mary Meadows Pitt, BSN, MSN 1956-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Melody Hyde Morgan 1930-2024
Coronado, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Eugene Fred Muehleisen Jr 1931-2024 Fridley, MN
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Dwight Morris 1940-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Bob & Trudy Mulligan 2005 & 2018 California
Robert J. Murphy 1937-2024 San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Patricia “Pat” M. Nickol 1946-20224 Birmingham, MI
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Thomas J. Noakes 1951-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Janet Murphy 1929-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Albert Magnus Bernard Nienhaus 1932-2024
Escondido, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Reuel White 1932-2023
El Cajon, CA
Marjorie Murray 1938-2024 La Jolla, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Carol Jean (Magoffin) Ninteman 1936-2024
Rancho Santa Fe, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Barbara L. (Odle) Nommesen 1944-2024 Cardiff, CA
Terence Edward Needham 1944-2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Donley Gordon McReynolds, M.D.) 1937-2024
Solana Beach, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Frederick Joseph Oginz 1951-2024
Oceanside, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Lee Okeson 1930-2024
Rancho Bernardo, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Jeffrey Scott Paisley 1954-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Reinold “Reiny” Pinneker 2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Albert Henry “Buster” Prince 1937-2024
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
William White 1936-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Marie I. Paiva 1931-2024
Cedar Park, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Santee, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Georgia Olsen 1925-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Gaylord O. Paulson 1939-2024
Frank Pisciotta 1925-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Roswell Pund 1963-2024
Rita Rank 1928-2024
La Jolla, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
James Patrick O’Neill 1935-2024
Alpine, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
La Jolla, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Esther W. Ransom 1924-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Barbara Leiser Pephens 1934-2024
Phyllis Ann Wild 1941-2024 Vancouver, WA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Sheila Purnell 1939-2024
Ramona, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
San Diego, CA
Mark Alan Potter 1945-2024
Vista, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Vella R. Raucy 1927-2024
Race Henri Paddock 1951-2024 Julian, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Frederick W. Pierce, IV 1962-2024
Rancho Santa Fe, CA
Escondido, CA
La Jolla, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Larry Quigley 1943-2024
Santa Cruz, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Gary Allen Reece 1941-2024
Ramona, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Robert ‘Bob’ Williams III 1946-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
James Ramey 1931-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Evangeline Regan 1932-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
John Reinhardt 2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Jean Atherton Rogers 1948-2024
Bonita, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Dr. John R. Russell, D.D.S. 1929-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Ramon Rendon 1946-2024
Chula Vista, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
William Emory Root 1945-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Greta E. Sandberg 1931-2024
James See 1948-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Scott Shelton 1965-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
William “Bill” Wade Spore, M.D. 1935-2024
San Diego, CA
Patricia Sprague 1928-2024
La Jolla, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Daniel Rigoli 1936-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Garry Hirsch Rosenblum 1941-2024
Los Angeles, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Flora Linda Sardina 1927-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
John Roy Simpson 1938-2024
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Robert “Bud (Music Man)” Roberds 1920-2024
Fallbrook, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
John ‘Jack’ Spencer Rule 1933-2024
San Diego, CA
R. Larry Schmitt, M.D. 1936-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Donald M. Stampfli 1929-2024 Poway, CA
Laurie Bushey Robinson 1962-2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
John ‘Jack’ Spencer Rule 1933-2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Daphne Maude (Hensley) Smith 1960-2024
El Centro, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Margaret Stein 1947-2024
La Jolla, CA
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Ronald R. Schutte 1947-2024 Vista, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Lady F. Smith 1921-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Paula Jean Svoboda 1949-2024
El Cajon, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
John “Jack” Talmadge 1936-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Sgt Maj Jerry “JT” Thomason 1949-2024
Oceanside, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Marilyn Jane Townsend 2024
Rancho Santa Fe, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Stacey Lee Valencia 1964-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Patricia Jean Vouaux 1933-2024
Santee, CA
Memory
Marisa Nichole Dawn Tatro 2024 Ramona, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Harold Throckmorton 1938-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Daniel William Turpin 1990-2024 Santee, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Margaret Lamb Vaughan 1925-2024
La Jolla, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Bill Waite 1942-2024 San Diego, CA
Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Robert L. Temple 1935-2024
Ramona, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
John R. Tickson 1947-2024 Lakeside, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Electa (Billie) Tussing 1928 - 2024 Chula Vista, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Alvin James Vildibill, Jr 1937-2024
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Robert LeRoy Temple 1935-2024 Ramona, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Patricia Ann Tisdale-Schroeder 1942-2024 San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
El Cajon, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Bradley Walborn 1960-2024 San Diego, CA
Ernest Andrew Thomas 1964-2024
San Diego, CA In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Ronald Totin 1945-2024 Fallbrook, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
John J. Shughrou, Jr., Captain USN (Ret.) 1930-2024 Murrieta, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Rolando Cruz Villarba 1934-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Mary L. Waters 1948-2024
El Cajon, CA
Nancy Beezley Usrey 1937-2024
San Diego, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Jeanine Volinski 1952-2024
Carlsbad, CA
In Loving Memory In Loving Memory
Eileen Roof Watson 1931-2024
San Diego, CA
Robert E. Williams, Ph.D. 1930-2024
Chula Vista, CA
Henry Wilton Williams 1937-2024
1939-2024
Silver Spring, MD
San Diego, CA
Kimball David Wing 1992-2024
Daniel
1943-2024
San Diego, CA
La Jolla, CA
Lois Kritchman Winsen 1926-2024
Rancho Bernardo, CA
Giving the eulogy at a funeral is an honor as well as an intimidating responsibility. Particularly if you are not accustomed to public speaking, it can be difficult to know where to begin.
Well, take a breath and relax. With a little forethought, you can prepare and deliver a stirring eulogy. It is important to invest the time necessary to prepare in advance. Do not wait to “wing it” during the funeral. That is a recipe for disaster. You may freeze up, ramble on, and miss out on the opportunity to pay proper tribute to your loved one. If you plan ahead and organize what you intend to say, it will minimize those dangers. When the time comes, you may choose to digress a bit from your prepared statements, but you will at least have a framework to guide you.
Writing the eulogy
To help with your preparation, make sure you carry a notepad, smartphone or tablet with you for note-taking purposes. Whenever you hear a family member or friend make a relevant observation
Jane Wolcott-Bisheimer 1928-2024
San Diego, CA In
May the constant love of caring friends soften your sadness. May cherished memories bring you moments of comfort. May lasting peace surround your grieving heart.
about the deceased, quickly jot it down. This way, you can keep track of quotations, humorous stories, and factual information. Later, when you sit down to organize your thoughts onto paper, you can use your notes as a reservoir of ideas. If you are have difficulty recalling information or getting input from others, don’t be afraid to ask outright. Spark conversations by asking questions such as:
• What is your favorite memory of your time with them?
• If you could sum up their life in one word, what word would that be?
• What kinds of hobbies did they have?
• What nicknames were they known by?
When you have gathered enough information, it is time to put it all together. While there is no right or wrong way to prepare a eulogy, the following blueprint can help you get started if you are unsure.
To begin, describe your own relationship with the deceased. Explain how you are personally affected by the loss. Remember that many of the people listening to you will understand fully and may share many of the same emotions. Next, work in some personal details pertaining to the deceased, and include
three or four anecdotes. Tell stories that included you, or that were shared with you by others. Heartwarming accounts of generosity are powerful when delivered in a eulogy. Stories that demonstrate the person’s character will resonate with the people who miss them. Humorous anecdotes provide much-needed comic relief from the tension of a funeral service. However, be sure to keep the humor respectful and appropriate.
Talk about life lessons you learned from them as well as the qualities that made your loved one special. Whenever possible, tie these lessons or qualities into your anecdotes. Keep the focus on the person you are honoring.
Near the end of the eulogy, consider addressing the deceased directly. For example, you can turn toward the casket and say, “Mom, I love you and I’m going to miss you. You taught me well, I couldn’t have asked for a better mother, and you will always be close to my heart.”
You should prepare a complete manuscript of what you plan to say. Using this manuscript, you can practice delivering the eulogy a few times to see how it flows and to edit for length. In
most cases, a eulogy of five to ten minutes (two to four typed pages) is appropriate. If you expect that you will stray from the manuscript during delivery, aim for shorter. If you tend to speak faster when nervous, prepare a longer eulogy.
Whether you take the complete manuscript to the podium or condense the eulogy onto cue cards is your decision. If you are nervous about speaking publicly, bring the entire manuscript up to the podium with you. Just having it handy can relieve your anxiety about getting lost during the eulogy. If you are a confident public speaker, condense the eulogy to bullet points on cue cards. This will help you deliver a more natural, conversational tribute to your loved one.
If you invest the time and energy in preparing the eulogy, you can approach your responsibility with confidence. Step up to the podium, take a deep breath to calm your nerves and get your bearings, and tell everyone about this wonderful person you are honoring.
It is never easy for someone who has lost a member of the family, even when it comes at the end of a long life or a prolonged illness. The loss is always deeply felt and followed by a period of grief. Considering this, how can you help support a friend who has suffered such a loss? Here are seven simple suggestions.
1. Be there for your friend
Expressing your support by being physically present with your friend is perhaps the single most appreciated action you can take. Because of the sensitive nature of the situation, many friends fail at this most basic task. Be sure to devote some time to spend with your friend in the days and weeks following the loss.
2. Don’t talk; listen
Your friend is likely experiencing a number of thoughts regarding the deceased, and you can be their sounding board. It is appropriatefor you to offer the occasional comment in order to share personal recollections, express sympathy, and provide encouragement, but most of the time you should just listen to what they have to say, and empathize with the feelings they share.
Allow your friend to work through volatile emotions, freely express grief without fear of judgment, and tell you how the deceased had an impact on his or her life.
3. Provide childcare
If your friend has children, volunteer to take care of them for an afternoon or evening. Particularly if your friend has to make funeral arrangements to handle, your offer can allow them to focus on those responsibilities without the hassle of arranging for a babysitter.
4. Drop off a meal
Prepare a home cooked meal and deliver it to your friend. There are enough things demanding their attention—preparing meals doesn’t have to be one of them. However, don’t pressure your friend to invite you to stay to share the meal. Rather than intruding on family time, simply drop the meal off and leave.
5. Show up for visitation and for the funeral
A day or two prior to many funerals, there are times designated for visitation. Often called a wake, this is an opportunity for people togather to view the body and to express their condolences to the family. Show up for at least a few minutes during one of these times,and then do your best to attend the funeral itself. If you are unable to attend the funeral in person, at least check in periodically over the phone or online.
6. Offer to help out with the reception
If your friend is responsible for organizing a reception following the funeral, volunteer your services. There are a variety of ways you can help out. For instance, you can offer your home as a possible location. You could also help with preparations if the reception is to be held at another location. If sandwiches or sweets are desired, you could offer to prepare some. During the reception, you could assist as a host. Afterward, stick around to help clean up.
7. Check in
Grief doesn’t simply end after the funeral. In fact, after the funeral is when the journey through grief truly begins. Check in with your friend regularly after the death. Remember the anniversary of the loss and ask your friend how you can support them on this day. Offer your company, assistance and support through the months and years to come.
Allow your friend to relax and show honest emotions. Losing a loved one can be an intensely stressful and exhausting experience. Your friend should not have to put on a brave face or attend to your needs. Give them the space and freedom they need to process the loss, even if it extends well beyond the date of the funeral.
By being sensitive to your friend’s mental and emotional state—and by taking some responsibilities upon yourself—you can help remove some of the weight from their shoulders. Your support in these ways will go a long way toward helping your friend through this time of loss.