Puzzle Answers
3 National Tell a Joke Day and Ed’s Bit
4–5 KA! JAM 6 Bumper Bible Breakdown 7 Kiddo 8–9 Giggle in the Middle 10 Build Your Own Gromit Competition 11 Readers’ Jokes 12–13 KA! World 14–15 Your Space
16 Patch’s Pals Naughty Norman
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EDITOR Cara Mott
DEPUTY EDITOR AND KA! JAM CO-ORDINATOR Ibukun Baku
EDITORIAL ASSISTANT Jacob Adams
GRAPHIC DESIGNER Philippa Martin
PROOFREADER Chris Horne
CONTACT US
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Email kidsalive@salvationarmy.org.uk
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FOUNDERS Catherine and William Booth
INTERNATIONAL LEADERS General Lyndon Buckingham and Commissioner Bronwyn Buckingham
TERRITORIAL LEADERS Commissioners Jenine and Paul Main
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Major Julian Watchorn
Published weekly by The Salvation Army United Kingdom and Ireland Territory. The Salvation Army is a Christian church and registered charity. The charity number in England, Wales and Northern Ireland is 214779, in Scotland SC009359 and in the Republic of Ireland CHY6399. ISSN 1363-5662.
Get Ready to Giggle for... NATIONAL TELL A JOKE DAY!
We have a special rule that you have to follow as you read this page of Kids Alive! – you’re not allowed to laugh. That’s because this is a very serious Kids Alive! issue, all about a special sport called silent tennis. It’s exactly like normal tennis, just without the racket! We’re kidding, it’s not about silent tennis (and to make a racket is to make lots of noise, just in case you didn’t know). It’s also not about a terrible footballer called Cinderella, who keeps running away from the ball. We almost created a special issue all about the tip of a broken pen, but we thought that might be a bit pointless! Instead, we’ve decided to focus on one of our favourite days – National Tell a Joke Day. In fact, it’s National Tell a Joke Day today (16 August)! This is a day to celebrate the funny things in life, and how brilliant it is that we can make one another laugh. So why not take part in this hilarious occasion by having a competition at your home to see who can make everyone giggle the most? Or you could make a funny comic with your friends!
No matter how you decide to celebrate we hope that you have a hilarious time. Now before you read the rest of this issue, let’s have one last joke! What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dino-snore! Come on – that one’s brilliant!
when...happens
To read some laugh-out-loud jokes sent to us by some of our readers, check out page 11
What did the...
Are you enjoying our National Tell a Joke Day issue so far? I love a good giggle. No matter how I’m feeling, hearing a good joke always cheers me up. Which reminds me, have you ever heard of the saying, ‘Laughter is the best medicine’? If you have, did you know it originally came from a Bible verse? Proverbs 17:22 says, ‘A cheerful heart is good medicine’ (New International Version).
Laughter can reduce stress and make us feel better, and if we feel good, then we can have a positive impact on others around us. That might be by sharing a joke to cheer them up, but it might also be by welcoming a new person to your class or encouraging your friend when they’re struggling. If you do things like these, you’ll feel good, and you can also be the medicine that others need to feel at their best too! Have a happy week, everyone!
A Whispered Name Amazing Children of the Bible
Check out your Bible –1 Samuel 1:26-28; 3:1-18
Listen Up!
How do you feel when you get into bed at night? I love snuggling under my duvet to get cosy and have a good rest – sleep is the best! Unfortunately, when I became a mum, I had to get used to having lots of disturbed sleep! Both of my daughters would wake up … a lot! They both sleep well now, but it took a lot of patience to get to the place we are now!
There’s plenty of patience on show in this week’s Bible cartoon too. Samuel is woken up several times by a voice, and he wakes Eli up too. After all those sleep interruptions, Eli and Samuel could have lost their patience – but they didn’t! Eli helped Samuel hear God’s voice and Samuel heard what God said and delivered the message God gave him.
Read the comment below about how we can hear God
says
Have you ever heard God speaking to you? I’ve never heard him in the same way as Samuel did, but there are plenty of moments where I’ve felt God was telling me something. Rather than a voice talking, I’ve felt God when I’ve been praying, listening to music, reading a book or spending time in nature. It was never a clear voice talking, but more of a feeling that God was with me, or that there was something he wanted me to know.
If you’ve never felt God talking to you, why don’t you try reading a new story in a Bible, listening to worship songs or spending some time being quiet in nature? Listen out and see if you can hear or feel what God wants to say to you.
Muddled Up Message
Below is a message from God that can be found in the Bible, but some of the words have got muddled up. Put them into the correct places to reveal the full message.
Proverbs
Answers on Page 2
Cara Mott
Bumper Bible Breakdown
Did you know the Bible isn’t one big book? It’s actually 66 books put together to tell one big story of God’s great love. Join us as we look at each Bible book and discover why God made the world, what went wrong and how in the end God saved the world through his son, Jesus.
Jesus Saves the World!
After Jesus was arrested, it was decided that he would be put to death. He was beaten and bullied by soldiers, and his friend, Peter, denied even knowing him. Then Jesus was hung on a cross next to two criminals.
Here’s the shocking twist in our story – Jesus (who is God himself) actually died! And after his death, he was taken down from the cross and put into a tomb. Then, two days later, a group of women who followed Jesus discovered that his tomb was empty!
Here’s another shocking twist – Jesus had come back to life! He visited the women, and once the women had told Jesus’ disciples that he was alive, he visited them too! So why did Jesus die? He died to save the world by taking the punishment for all the wrong things we do. But we can celebrate, because Jesus came back to life!
Name:
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Unbelievable Animals
Forget cats and dogs – there are some animals that are so strange that it’s hard to believe they actually exist! Over the next few weeks, we’ll discover some of the wackiest!
Proboscis Monkeys
Proboscis monkeys look like any other ordinary monkey – except for the fact that they’ve got humongous noses! They use these noses to attract partners by making loud and impressive noises. These monkeys live in the jungles of Borneo, and mostly eat seeds, leaves and fruits.
Problem...
Hello, readers, i’M PATCH AND I’VE GOT A PROBLEM I THINK YOU MAY BE ABLE TO HELP ME WITH. i’VE LOST A VERY IMPORTANT OBJECT SOMEWHERE IN THIS ISSUE. WOULD YOU BE ABLE TO HELP ME FIND IT? i HAVE A CLUE OF WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE HERE.
You might know the date that Valentine’s Day is on or the name of the current king of the United Kingdom. However, there are also plenty of strange facts we reckon you haven’t got stored in your noggin! So here are a couple of random facts that you definitely (and by definitely, we mean don’t really) need to know.
If you want to send a postcard to someone, then you might take it to a post office. If you were to send a postcard from a place called Vanuatu, then you might take it to a post office that’s underwater! That’s because Vanuatu is home to the world’s only underwater post office. In fact, you have to swim down three metres below the surface to get to it!
Imagine living somewhere that’s named after a TV show! Although there’s no town called Bluey or Doctor Who, there is a city in the USA named after a radio show. In 1950, to celebrate the 10th anniversary of a super popular show called Truth or Consequences, a city called Hot Springs changed its name to Truth or Consequences!
Ho ho, ha ha, he he!
He he, he he!
Hoho,haha,hehe! Hehe,hehe!
ho, ho!
t e l l a j o k e day WO R D S E A R C
Find the National Tell a Joke Day-related words in the grid
doctor, doctor comedy chuckle giggle funny
riddles knock, knock belly laugh hilarious
Hoho,haha,hehe!
one-liner
punchline
Why can’t you trust the stairs?
Because they’re always up to something!
I’m writing a book about glue... ...but I’m stuck on the first chapter!
I went to buy some camouflage trousers... ...but I couldn’t find any!
Why did the man throw water out of the window? He wanted to see the waterfall!
PAGE PUZZLE PAGE PUZZLE
Explore this week’s ‘Kids Alive!’ to work out which pages these images are taken from
laugh out loud jokes A C E B D F G H
What’s a sea monster’s favourite lunch? Fish and ships!
What did the nose tell the finger?
‘Stop picking on me!’
by Neil Locker
across:
1 Donkey. 3 Grassy part of garden. 6 Colourful art material, such as watercolour and oil. 7 Hot beverage. 8 Cain’s brother in the Bible. 10 Correct or not false.
12 Item from which a baby bird hatches. 13 Stopping device on a bicycle. 15 Sycamore, for example. 16 Rug.
down:
1 Letters from A to Z. 2 Item of footwear for winter sport.
3 Arriving after the due time.
4 H2O. 5 Walkway beside a road.
9 Keen. 11 Woodwind instrument.
The answers to the clues are made up using all the letters from the list of words below. The three highlighted letters have already been placed in the grid to help you. Solve the clues and use up all the remaining letters. 1 2 3 3
across:
1 The Holy _ _ _ _ _.
2 Glowing coal.
3 Name of book, for example. down:
1 Invited visitor.
L I M
2 Planet’s path.
3 Number of blind mice in the song.
14 Upper limb of your body. right bee mouth seer list
by Neil Locker
TBuild Your Own Gromit Competition
here are plenty of spectacular dogs that have appeared in films across the years, such as Scooby Doo and Superman’s pet, Krypto. However, there’s no dog quite like Gromit, from Wallace and Gromit! That’s because Gromit is ridiculously smart – he’s a fab chess player, and he loves reading long books. However, he’s also a super loyal sidekick to his best friend, Wallace! Now, with the Build Your Own Gromit kit, you can make your own Gromit at home! All you need to do is slot together the cardboard parts in the kit – you don’t need any glue, which means that there’s no mess and no fuss. Before you know it, you’ll have your own Gromit to play with. You’ll be able to wag his tail to make his legs walk and press his head to raise his ears. If that doesn’t sound like cracking fun, then we don’t know what does! For your opportunity to win a Build Your Own Gromit kit, answer the question below and email your full name, age, address and answer to kidsalive@salvationarmy.org.uk
Remember to put ‘Build Your Own Gromit Competition’ in the subject box. Your entry needs to reach us by Friday 12 September when the winners will be chosen. You can also enter by filling in the details on the coupon below and posting it to: Build Your Own Gromit Competition, Kids Alive! 1 Champion Park, London SE5 8FJ.
What’s the name of Gromit’s best friend?
Shaggy Superman Wallace
Name:
Address:
READERS’ JOKES
Who knew that our Kids Alive! readers could be absolutely hilarious? We did, of course – which is why we asked some of our readers to send us their favourite jokes! They more than delivered, because we think these jokes are laugh-out-loud funny. In fact, if you can make it to the end of this page without giggling, then you probably deserve a gold star (a sticker, not a real star – obviously)!
Living a healthy and an active lifestyle and caring for your physical, mental and spiritual well-being.
B a c k t o S c h o o
Back to school, already? We’ve packed this issue full of ridiculous jokes, but we’re not joking right now. While lots of our readers will still be in the middle of their summer holidays, we know that some of you might have already gone back to school – or you’ll be going back during the coming week!
Love It or Hate It?
How do you feel about school? You might love going to school, or you might feel it’s about as uncool as that annoying old song your parents or carers won’t stop listening to. We actually think that school is absolutely fantastic. Don’t believe us? Well, keep on reading and we’ll tell you why!
School is Spectacular!
Here are just a couple of reasons why we love school…
It helps you to learn important skills. Although you might not understand right now why you need to know how to figure out what 90 per cent of 2,428 is, the skills that you learn at school are actually incredibly useful. In fact, you’ll find yourself using lots of them throughout the rest of your life!
It helps you to explore things you’re interested in. If you love writing stories, creating art or playing sports, then you can do those things at school – and you can learn how to do them really well. Every lesson at school is an opportunity to discover something new that you might love!
Feeling Nervous?
Hopefully you’ve started to see why we think school is so fab. However, the thought of having to go to school might still make you feel a bit nervous. You might be struggling to figure out how you can make the most of the lessons you go to, or how you can make friends. If that’s how you’re feeling, don’t worry – we’ve got some tips for you on page 13!
Tips for Learning
Try your hardest to pay attention during lessons, but talk to a parent, carer or trusted grown-up if you’re struggling at school. You don’t need to ever feel embarrassed to ask for help – we reckon even Albert Einstein (a super genius) sometimes needed help from grown-ups when he was a kid!
Do your homework! It might not be as interesting as watching a TV show or playing a game, but homework helps you to understand what you’re learning about at school even better.
We know it can be frustrating when you’re finding a lesson hard, or don’t know the answer to a question. However, try to stay positive about not knowing everything, as this means that you’re about to learn something new!
Make sure that you get enough sleep on school nights and eat a healthy breakfast. This will help you to feel prepared for the day ahead.
Tips for Making Friends
If your school has clubs, then join one or two that interest you. This will help you to meet people who have things in common with you, which is always a good starting point for making friends.
Ask people questions about themselves, such as questions about what they’re interested in. Make sure you listen to what they’re saying too.
Saying something nice can be a great way to start a friendship. If you think someone’s got an awesome haircut or the coolest backpack you’ve ever seen, let them know!
If you see someone’s struggling with something, offer to help them. Ask other kids to help you if you need it too. Doing this might start up a great conversation!
Making friends can sometimes be tricky, but there will always be others around you who want to make friends too – so just go for it!
We hope you have a brilliant time when you go back to school!
Cool Colou ri ngs
What an amazing rainbow turtle! This colouring was sent by Akeesa, aged 3 –we can tell how much she loves the ocean!
We’d love to see a butterfly in real life that’s as colourful as the one in this colouring! It was sent by Theivamani, aged 6.
Theivamani’s colouring put a big smile on my face when I saw it – great work!
Mithiran, aged 8, sent this awesome pastelcoloured creation! The butterfly looks spectacular!
Here’s another colouring to celebrate our oceans. This was coloured in by Emily, aged 5. The turtle looks very happy with its blue and green shell!
This colouring was created by Melissa, aged 8, to celebrate Trooping the Colour – King Charles’s Birthday Parade. The soldiers’ uniforms look super smart!
H a p p y B i r t h d a y t o y o u !
To see your name and birthday printed in a future issue of KA! email your full name and date of birth to kidsalive@salvationarmy.org.uk
21 August
Willow Salvage-Buss – age 6
We were buzzing to see this beautiful Bee Colouring! Ruby, aged 8, coloured it in to celebrate National Bee Day – it’s fab!
Age? 11.
Favourite colour? Orange, purple, pink.
Favourite food? Sweets and jacket potato.
Favourite sport? Badminton.
G e t I n T o u c h !
Favourite bit of Kids Alive!? Games.
Favourite Bible story and why? The Lost Sheep, because the shepherd already had lots of sheep, but he went out of his way to find that one sheep. This shows us that everybody is important.
The Kids Alive! team loves to hear from its readers. And guess what –other readers love reading your news! So why not get in touch?
You can email or post your own colourings, drawings and letters. Or you could ask your Sunday school, church or corps leaders to email us or write to us with any news about the fun stuff you’ve been doing at your church or corps.
Favourite TV programme? SpongeBob Squarepants.
What do you want to be when you’re older? Author.
Pets? Tarantula.
Hobbies? Playing with my little brother and going gym.
Tell us a joke. Why are pirates called pirates? Because they arrrr! What special skill or talent do you have? I’m good at badminton and handstands.
Email: kidsalive@salvationarmy.org.uk
Post: Kids Alive! 1 Champion Park, London SE5 8FJ
Tell us something interesting about yourself. My longest handstand I have ever done was eight seconds.
I hate cabbage! I’ve got a cunning idea!
my dad is always telling me to put others first, so you can go ahead of me.
Ha, HA! No cabbage for me!
That’s very kind of you, norman. ...you can have a double portion!
don’t worry, there’s plenty more cabbage...
...and because you were so kind to that girl...
