THE TABARD
LITERARY MAGAZINE 2023-2024
Salesian College Preparatory
Richmond, California
Poetry & Prose
Nancy Cervantes • Oromena Eruhun • Anna Clara Oliveria •
Carlos Josemaria Perez • Jeffery Timms • Jayden White
Editors
Kathryn Tolentino • Petra Draper Arrivas • Sarabjot Kullar
Mr. McCarthy
Cover Art
Samantha De Leon • Kailey Miranda
Robert Chuang • Harvey Saravia
POETRY
The Never-Ending Waves
Nancy Cervantes
Oceans, rivers, lakes, ponds: our beings capture the essence of water and existing with it we are reborn.
Have you felt the tranquility and peacefulness along the crashes of the waves? Have you cried at that longing for never-ending calm and internal happiness?
I have seen the lonesome lakes, each with its rippling current, and felt sadness and regret, deep and pure blue. I have seen anger entangled in the lives of people, a sole existence that has untied these knots.
And I have transformed my being to the ways of the water. Here where it is free and the future is endless,
I feel what others do and my life has been fortified. I know pain and difficulty, I am now living on the never-ending waves of peace and happiness.
Orbit
Oromena Eruhun
Sitting and waiting, gut wrenching feelings
My mind and soul suffer like a planet conquered by global warming
And similar to a planet I must once again orbit around the sun
The greatest star, like the gravitational force that the sun holds I remain attracted
However, these feelings remain superficial
Uncalculated and rash, no sort of thought in these words.
You remain just a means for me to continue to spill my guts.
Won’t you eventually free me from this tedious grasp?
Ghost
Oromena Eruhun
Can you see through me
Transparency wasn’t what I was going for I’ve become the phantom that I wished to escape
All my worst fears out in the open
All my vicious thoughts attacking me once again
It’s a deep dark spiral, will I ever escape
Covered in a white veil, the reaper finally found its prey
Time
Oromena Eruhun
For what purpose do we live?
To make memories?
After a few hasty breaths we are nothing forever. A few shaky breaths and all of the memories and things that have been achieved disappear. For a few stolen breaths.
Breaths that don’t last long
A rather annoying thought that comes up Is it really worth it?
What exactly do I keep waiting for?
Money? Excitement? Fame? Pleasure?
Do all these things deserve my attention or am I sitting in the corner like a fool
A rather ignorant fool to say the least
Nevertheless I’ll bet all that by mere coincidence you’d look at me like that again.
Glance
Oromena Eruhun
Kind stranger can you spare me a minute?
Give me a chance to be great
Just a little bit of your time to spare Grace me with a bit of your presence
The mere thought of a look in my direction opens up a realm of possibilities
The same realm that I would only ever see in my dreams.
Always Waiting
Anna Clara Oliveria
Grace, weeks or months, I do not know. Laying asleep
Motionless Wires attached.
My restless eyes watch from afar Noises from the distance Beeping, But Grace remains asleep with figures in white surrounding her stricken body.
My heart halts at a stop as I hear that Grace will not awaken in decades. Shaken, tearful eyes look at the white being.
Decades it may be that I may not see those delightful eyes.
Taking a Dance in Life
Carlos Josemaria Perez
In May’s cool overcast and light breeze, She eagerly picks me up at my humble address, She articulates modesty and class with ease, As she wears her timeless sapphire sheath dress. I analyze her and ensure she’s recognized, With her stunning body and sublime beauty. “You’re acting a bit naughty!” she tantalized. I was too embarrassed to call her a cutie.
We drive to the chapel and I open her door.
For the Lord’s blessing, we attend Mass. She sits beside me, as my dearest mentor, With the disposition of a pretty little lass. I ask the Lord for her to stay years more, For passionate prairies and golden grass, With nothing but her love for ages past.
After the Holy Eucharist, we slowly leave. We enjoy each moment and head to eat. Hopefully, the Lord gave us His reprieve, For her love is rejuvenating and sweet. Much more delectable and no more perfectible, Than her homemade meal filled with love ever so real.
When the golden apples of the sun
Become the silver apples of the moon, She pulls me close and baptizes me ‘Hun.’
We dance tenderly as she swoons, And I promise to hold her in the long run.
I feel her warm body pressed against mine, With her soft breasts up against my chest. I gently kiss her experienced lips, And the taste spreads up my spine. She’s all I’ll ever need until the day I rest, As all I once knew, she had eclipsed.
Amidst the languorous, fleeting candlelight, Her saintly soul and holy heart are all I see. As we spiral ceaselessly into the night, I lose and find myself as she becomes me.
I vow to her that on one warm July, I’ll marry her and make her my wife. I fully hearken to her sweet love’s lullaby, As she says, “I feel high taking a dance in life!” Oh! My baby and I! We’d never bid goodbye.
But with January’s unforgiving, somber sky, I abruptly open my weary eyes, And she flows down my cheeks as I cry. I didn’t even get to say goodbye. How foolish of me, to think she was mine.
Unititled Unknown
Imitation of “The Shapes of Leaves” By Arthur Sze
December 3rd, 1987
On the plush snow-filled streets I saw you walking in my direction, with those beautiful grey eyes so enchanting. You took your gloves off and took a sip of your warm coffee, and you dropped one of them. In the fluffy snow, your glove settled, until I went and picked it up.
I turned around to give it to you but you were already gone.
I have your glove now, it rests next to my desk lamp. I hope to see you again.
December 29th, 1987
I saw you again, in the flower shop you own. I went in to buy myself flowers when I saw those grey eyes of yours, and I was shocked that I had seen you again. These past few weeks have been the most fun I have ever had, they were amazing because of you.
I don’t buy flowers from other flower shops anymore, they aren’t as pretty.
May 3rd, 1988
You remind me of all the pretty flowers blooming in the Spring, your laugh, your smile, your kindness, your presence, just you.
You make me the happiest I have ever been in a long while, a breath of fresh air
September 12th, 1988
Moving Boxes still crowded the living room, we helped each other unpack all our belongings. We’ve settled into a new apartment, it suits both you and me. The autumn breeze made it cold. We sat together outside on our balcony, watching the stars as the wind flew past us. We were covered in blankets and drinking hot cocoa, and the light hue of the moon illuminated our faces. You looked so relaxed, so at peace, and you looked at me with so much adoration. You said you would do anything for me, and I said I would do anything for you. I wouldn't want to be here with anybody else.
November 29th, 1988
Yesterday was Thanksgiving. You said you were so grateful to have me in your life, and I said I was so grateful to have met you. We talked about all of our lovely memories, ate delicious food, watched some movies, but something felt wrong. It felt as though you were hiding something from me. Were you?
December 3rd, 1988
You told me that on the day you dropped your glove, you had seen me too.
You said you were captivated by my beauty, and wished to see me again too.
When you saw me enter the flower shop that day, you were still and couldn’t move.
From the moment you saw me, you knew you were in love.
From the moment I saw you, I knew I was in love. The ring is beautiful, so, so beautiful. It’s a symbol of our love, my favorite gemstone, you remembered.
I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you
Mother Nature is Not Your Mother
Kathryn Tolentino
In the beginning, I was the barren universe
Then He created Earth
Then I was light
I was the sea and the sky and the land
I was the fish and the birds and the animals
I was the sun that rose and set
I was the moon that waxed and waned
I was the multitude of stars that filled the heavens
Then He made you, you humans
You beautiful, strange creatures
The creation that I was to provide for
The creation that had dominion over me
I was named your caretaker and you were named mine
We were one, and we were together with Him
I was named Mother Nature
And you were named His children
That is a fitting title, I think
I watched as you grew and learned I watched as your civilizations rose and fell
I have seen how much you have created
And I have seen how much you have destroyed
But I have constantly provided so much for you
I gave you beauty
In the sky, I painted sunrises and sunsets
Deep in my earth, I planted iridescent gems I gave you beauty to calm your souls
And as you have grown and created
As you have fought and destroyed
I have tried to remain a constant
But you have made it impossible for me to do so
My fish choke on your plastic
My sky gives acid rain because of your pollutants
My birds fall from the sky because of your pesticides
My land has been leveled to make way for your houses
My forests have been decimated for your furniture
My animals struggle to survive on the land you destroy
My sun rises and sets, but you go inside to artificial worlds
My moon still waxes and wanes, but you no longer need it for light
My stars are still present, but no one uses them to guide their way
You have rejected me
You no longer need me as your Mother
I applaud your independence
But you have inflicted too much damage
Many of you aren’t sorry
Many of you won’t spare a single moment to think of me
You don’t want the guilt for the consequences you know you ’ ve caused
The sun will still give you sunrises and sunsets
At night the moon will still wax and wane
And the night sky will still be filled with a myriad of stars
Alone, part of me mourns
I mourn the animals you have maimed and killed I mourn for my vast oceans overflowing with your trash I mourn what you have become and all you have done
You must think me pathetic
I was once great
I was once appreciated, loved, and revered
I was the great god Pan of wild places
I was Apollo of the sun and Artemis of the moon
But you have been told that Pan is dead
And many of you no longer believe in gods
I once loved your reverence
But I do not need it
I once loved helping you fix your mistakes
But you have made too many I once loved you and part of me still does
But I don’t need you
I don’t need you for my survival
I am not just the plants and animals or mountains and oceans
I am the universe and all its phenomena
I am the planets, the stars, the cosmos
I do not exist solely on Earth
I still exist after the extinction of hundreds of species
You humans are no different I will exist if you go extinct
Your extinction will not be my end
Nor will it be my fault
I will go on and you will only be a part of my history
If you want to live, if you want your species to survive
Don’t destroy my Earth and work to fix it
Not for my sake but for yours
I am not your Mother and I won’t fix your mistakes
You have to do it by yourself
Because with or without you
I will adapt and change
And I will persist
“Hometown” Samantha De Leon
PROSE
THE HILL
Nancy Cervantes
The wind carries me away from the world, from the children yelling, the bubbles floating in the air, and my twelve-year-old sister sitting beside me. There was a moment of green silence. Then the wind carries me back to the children playing, the dancing trees, the smell of freshly popped popcorn, and my sister sitting beside me.
I turned to look at my sister, she got up so abruptly.
“Look, cotton candy! I’m going to go get one, you want one?” Hallie asked.
“Sure, Hallie!” I exclaimed.
I watch my sister run down the hill stopping in front of the cotton candy, standing in line. Hallie looks back at me with a big, goofy grin excited to have a taste of the sweet cloud. I smile back at my little sister, somberly. This park, this hill, is so green. It truly feels lonely here.
The wind picks up and families begin to leave. Only a few people are left sitting on benches and reading books or listening to music.
The sound of the wind flowing through the trees, the birds soaring together in the sapphire blue sky, the prickly grass grazing my legs. No more laughter from children and their parents. No more dogs running about chasing squirrels. I truly am lonely. We are alone. It’s really cold.
I look towards the cotton candy stand.
Hallie. She’s gone.
Only two cones of fluffy clouds lay on the dirty cement.
There’s only so much a fourteen-year-old could do in a situation like this.
Hallie was gone, no sight of her anywhere. I had to leave, away from this place, what once was our home. So I left on a train three and a half months later.
I continued to grow. I grew my mind into an older one, got a job, and went to university. By the time I was twenty-one, I decided to go back to that hill. It was the anniversary of the disappearance of my little sister once again. I have to go back this time. For her.
I sit in the same spot Hallie and I would sit. The hill is still so green. It’s completely empty here. No laughter, no bubbles floating past me, just debris and trash littering the cold, hard pavement. Abandoned cotton candy stands boarded up, benches crumpling down, and everything but the hill and trees are still so green.
It’s really cold. Once again in the depths of silence and so alone.
A piece of paper settles beside me in Hallie’s spot. It’s wrinkled, dirty, and a little torn.
On the center of the page lies the face of my sister. She would have been nineteen this year. I wish we could have grown together, left this place, and explored the world. But she’s dead. They finally found her after seven years, but my little sister was dead.
“Apples don’t fall far” Samantha De Leon
Short Story
Jeffery Timms
“Why can't I do it all?” Trev asked himself as he juggled a soccer ball in his room. After juggling the ball about 20 times he stopped and fell to the floor of his room. On the floor he was surrounded by a football, a basketball, track shoes, and his soccer ball. After lying there staring at his ceiling covered in posters of famous athletes he got up and decided to start juggling again.
“Can you like, not do that?” asked his sister Charlotte.
“Don’t you have midterms?” Trev questioned.
“Well how can I possibly focus when you keep letting the ball hit the wall? Anyway what’s up with all these balls?” she asked.
“Well I can’t decide which sport to play. I would like to do all but mom will only let me do one, ” Trev told her.
With a glance, she told him “I can help you decide” to which Trev promptly accepted.
“Well for starters you can’t play football or do you forget about what Kevin did last year, ” Charlotte said.
“You’re right. Most, if not all of the team hates me. Shoot I would too if I was the younger brother of the guy who dropped the game winning ball, he sure is lucky he graduated,” Trev said.
“It’s not like you would have been great at football either,” Charlotte said while picking up the football from the floor.
“What do you mean, I'm a great wide receiver,” Trev said as he dropped the pass that Charlotte just threw at him.
“Anyway, moving on. Trev, why do you even have this basketball here? I’ve seen you play,” Charlotte said. In a family full of basketball players Trev was the odd man out. Despite having the perfect build of 6”3 he still wasn’t good at basketball.
“I can’t argue with you on that, but just think how proud Dad would be if I made the team,” Trev said.
“Well you making even junior varsity would catch me off guard,” Charlotte laughed.
“Okay. Okay fine. What about soccer though?” he asked.
“Well you might have a chance there, little T,” Charlotte said, “ you ’ ve gotten much better at that than in any other sport.”
“Yeah, but the competition is heavy, will I even stand a chance?”
Now walking back to her room Charlotte said, “You can’t let competition deter you, if that's your mentality then you’ll never succeed little bro.” Following her, Trev felt like he didn’t receive the closure he wanted.
Now, standing in a bright pink room lined to the brim with trophies, Trev found himself at the end of his list of sports.
“Wow it seems like you get more and more trophies every day sis,” Trev said.
“Well, such is the life of a winner little brother,” Charlotte said.
“A winner,” Trev said quietly under his breath. He now was captivated by every single time he lost. He could remember each time he failed, each time he didn’t reach a standard he should be at. Every day he dwelled upon this. Maybe he was never meant to be a winner or an athlete at all. What else could possibly be the reason for someone to fail this many times athletically. Dwelling upon these thoughts, his eyes began to tear up just a tad, but then started welling up more to the point of overflowing. He quickly wiped his eyes to cover up his shame. He was the only one in his family not to excel. His thoughts were interrupted though by his sister telling him to scram, to which he obliged.
Retreating to his room he was back where he started. Surrounded by his many failures he opened his closet and pulled out a box. This box was full of his father’s trophies of which he scratched out his father’s name and wrote his. These superficial objects told him what he could be. The hand that gripped the trophies showed him what he wasn’t.
Hours of feeling sorry for himself passed and Trev got hungry. As he made his way to the kitchen he passed his mother’s room. Ever since her husband left to pursue a professional career she’s been all alone. She doesn’t even watch sports or want to hear about sports. Members of the family have started calling her a “Proclaimed Widower.”
Before going into the kitchen he walked past a portrait of his father holding up his college trophy both arms raised high. He wished he could do that too, but how could a handicapped player ever play ball?
The Book
Jayden White
“Ramsey! Ramsey! Ramsey, do you know the answer to the question on the board?” Unready, and chronically tired, I did not respond to Mr. Thomas. After my silence, Mr. Thomas asked for me to stay after class. As I waited for class to end, I looked at my watch and read January 24th, 8:33 am. Exhausted and disappointed, I kept my head down and continued to think about my dreams and the countless ways life could merely be a simulation.
Once the bell had rung, I got up from my seat and put my notebooks and pencils in my bag. As I walked over to Mr. Thomas, it felt as if the pressure of a million rocket ships was blasting off of my shoulders. This wasn’t the first time this had happened, soI knew that I was in for a long speech. Mr. Thomas, with his gray hair and interesting eyes, looked at me and asked, “Why do you never pay attention in my class when I’m teaching?” I answered honestly, “My mind always seems to be somewhere else. It’s almost as if I’m in a different world that doesn’t even seem to exist.” When I answered, Mr. Thomas looked at me as if he understood me. It was almost like I wasn’t looking at Mr. Thomas. It was like I was looking at myself in the mirror and I saw my dreams expressed through his eyes. Without saying a word, Mr. Thomas got up slowly and asked me to follow him to his bookshelf at the back of the classroom. Never feeling as I have felt before about these past occurrences, I walked with Mr. Thomas to the bookshelf. He grabbed a dark blue book and blew dust off the cover of it, revealing its true beauty. It was as if the secrets of the world were unleashed. Looking at the book, I was shocked. The dark blue color of the book reminded me of galaxies beyond our understanding. The
deepness of the blue unlocked my inner desires and dreams. Mr. Thomas held the book and said, “I was once a kid just like you, dreaming about the universe, wondering and insisting that there were different realities, and questioning if I was living in a simulation.” For the first time in my life I felt as if someone understood me, as if they knew exactly what I was thinking. Mr. Thomas gave the book to me and said, “Read this book at night. Alone. Quietly. Thoroughly.” Excited, I immediately grabbed the book and I felt like a mayor, holding the keys to the city. As I was exiting Mr. Thomas' classroom, I noticed that the book’s title was in a different language. Confused, I turned around to ask Mr. Thomas about the title, but the door was already closed. Thinking nothing of it, I continued on my way home to finally read a book that caught my attention.
After I arrived at home, I rushed inside faster than a stampede of horses running across a field and dumped all of my things on the floor. Instantly, I grabbed my book and went inside of my room. However, as soon as I was about to open the book, I remembered Mr. Thomas’s words, “Read this book at night. Alone. Quietly. Thoroughly.” It was only 5:30 pm when I got home, so I decided to take a nap and read it after I woke up.
Waking up like it was Christmas Day, I looked at my alarm clock and it read, “January 25th, 12:26am.” Excitedly, I grabbed my book and sat up on my bed. Mesmerized by the dark blue color of the book, I closed my eyes and opened it, full of curiosity. When I opened the book, I felt something….a shift. A different
setting….feeling….sensation in my body. A strong gust of wind like a tornado hit my face. The feeling of the bed below my legs was gone. It was as if I were floating on a cloud. Was I alive? Worried? Scared? Happy? Opening my eyes, I could not believe it, the sight was amazing. The universe was laid out before me. I saw planets, universes, stars, comets, and asteroids. I turned around and saw robots, computers, and technology developed in a way I have never seen before. All around me was a different era, a time in space where everything was completely different. It was almost as if I was living in my dreams. As I looked around, I noticed that things were different from my normal world. Although it seemed as if I was in a different world, I still had memories of my home, Mr. Thomas, and the book.
As I was exploring and looking around in this new world, I felt alive, energetic, and most importantly, engaged. I was running around the new world with a smile across my face as if I was a kid, playing with a new toy. Interestingly, I saw another kid running around. Intrigued, I decided to walk over and introduce myself. As I got closer, the strange kid noticed me and was frightened so he hid behind a bush. Instantly I shouted, “Hey! I’m no harm! I’m a kid just like you!” Slowly, the strange kid revealed himself and came over to me. His gray hair immediately struck me as odd. Happily, we introduced ourselves to each other. The kid introduced himself as Galvin. Curious, I asked Galvin where he came from, and he said, “I have no idea, but this place sure is fun!” I agreed, and Galvin and I continued to explore the mysterious world we were in.
After a while, there was a sudden shake in the world that Galvin and I were exploring. The shake was so strong that it felt as if the world was splitting into two. Quickly, I asked Galvin, “What should we do?” Galvin’s response was, “We must look for shelter or a high mountain!” As we quickly looked around, we spotted a glowing building. Without any words exchanged, we immediately raced toward the glowing building floating in this mysterious galaxy. Tossing and turning, dodging and bolting through the various catastrophes happening around us, we finally arrived.
Upon entering the glowing building, there seemed to be something important about it that I just couldn’t figure out yet. As Galvin and I entered the building, the first thing that caught our attention was a golden pedestal with a missing item from it. Intrigued, Galvin and I walked towards the pedestal and noticed the print left behind on it. It turned out that the missing item seemed to be a sort of book. At that moment, I wondered if the book Mr. Thomas gave me was the missing book from this pedestal. Feeling guilty, I was going to say to Galvin that the book may be missing from the pedestal because I have it, which was causing the world to shake. However, before I could express my thoughts to Galvin, Galvin pulled out the exact book that I had. Flabbergasted and stunned, I stood there staring at the book with its dark blue color, and title written in an almost completely different language. I looked at Galvin and in his eyes, I saw something familiar, and realized who Galvin truly was. Galvin was no other than Mr. Thomas from my school. At that moment, Galvin told me the true meaning of the book. He said, “This book possesses the power of transferring between different universes and timelines. When I wield this book, I hold the power to control space and time.” I was puzzled and did not
know what I should do. As I was standing there, Galvin said, “I was once a kid just like you, dreaming about the universe, wondering and insisting that there were different realities, and questioning if I was living in a simulation.”
“:)” Samantha De Leon
