/2002_1229_A by Ravi Pall

IMP 22 February 2002 Issue 1229

The Student Newspaper for Imperial College

Gold Fii ltd the rest of him. Oscar gets it on. (Page 27)

Possibly the weirdest thing I've seen today, and I went to Council! Simian. (Page 25)

Council Makes A Decision The U n i o n is half-way to a n e w constitution this w e e k after the draft s u r v i v e d its first reading i n Tuesday's unconventional meeting of C o u n c i l .

year since the e n d of his tenure as Deputy President (Clubs & Societies), resigned at the last meeting due to the conflicting demands of his U n i o n duties and degree course. A n d y H e e p s , former U n i o n President a n d C o l l e g e celebrity, h a d acted i n M r Sharpe's place for Tuesday's meeting and w a s confirmed as C o u n c i l Chair by a vote before the m e e t i n g closed.

The meeting k i c k e d off w i t h a record turn-out as members of IndianSoc tried to take issue w i t h the President's h a n d l i n g of fire regulations at their 'East meets West' event. C o u n c i l d e c i d e d not to entert a i n the complaint, however, requesting that they should present their argument more formally at a later date. The remainder of the meeting w a s cons u m e d b y the approval a n d amendment of a draft constitution, the creation of w h i c h has so far taken u p the majority of C o u n c i l sessions this year. It has b e e n b e e n necessary due to the change to faculties by College, w h i c h must n o w be reflected i n the Union's o w n structure. been Recent C o u n c i l s h a v e also p l a g u e d b y l o w attendance of its members. The number of attending members must exceed the C o u n c i l ' s quorum for the meeting to be v a l i d - half of the members i n this case - but a count is only required

A n d y Heeps (for it is he...) should someone call for the q u o r u m to be checked. A s a result, members last night spent m u c h of their time referring to "the Q w o r d " w h e n d i s c u s s i n g the quora to be set b y the n e w constitution. The draft itself p a s s e d reasonably uneventfully, w i t h no major upheavals.

This meeting marks a particularly favourable part of the nascent constitution's journey to implementation. Council's work w a s completed before the imposed guillotine - essentially an enforced e n d to d i s c u s s i o n at a specific time - w h i c h w a s certainly a contrast w i t h previous meetings. Unless there is any strong opposition at its next reading i n U n i o n Council, the constitution w i l l pass to College's C o u n c i l and, subject to its approval, s h o u l d take effect on the 1st A u g u s t 2002. Alisdaii

The final item on the agenda w a s the matter of C o u n c i l Chair. Sam Sharpe, w h o h a d b e e n chairing meetings for the past

1111^

you get to decide who wins and who loses. It's all a bit sadistic, really." Interviews with all the candidates...

REFERENCE COLLECTION Imperial College and Science Museum Libraries

college news

ULU Elections On top of our o w n U n i o n elections, the candidates for the top posts at the University of L o n d o n U n i o n have been announced, including one of this year's I C U sabbaticals. Students

educational

institutions across the capital, including Imperial, w i l l vote online next month to decide who w i l l run the U n i o n in the coming year. Standing for the only contested position, that of President, are Charlotte Dawkins of Q M U L and Chris Piper from Kings College. Rob Davenport, this year's Deputy President for C l u b s & Societies at our U n i o n , is standing for election as U L U ' s Vice President for Sports. A l s o nominated are Claire Wren of U C L , standing for the position of Vice President for Finance & Societies, and James M a c C o l l ,

also of U C L , standing for Vice President for Welfare & Student Affairs. There are some concerns about the election, as it appears that voters w i l l not have the option of voting for a 'New Election' candidate, meaning that those standing for uncontested positions are almost assured of w i n n i n g their respective polls. Voters w i l l also be unable to spoil their online ballot 'papers'. A l l U L U members, except the R e t u r n i n g Officer and including the candidates themselves, are entitled to vote in the election, provided that they have registered for a U L U card. These can be obtained from Union Reception in Beit Quad, or from the U L U reception in M a l e t Street. Passwords providing access to the online voting site w i l l be

Nurses at Wye? Wye

is already

accommo-

d a t i n g 55 cadets from the Police Training academy in Ashford. It is not thought that any further such ventures are being planned, as the Provost of Wye recently announced his intention to see student numbers there rise by ten percent a year for each of the next five years.

The U n i o n have been involved at every stage of these negotiations, and w i l l continue to be consulted as they progress. Felix has been assured that this deal, if it happens, w i l l be to the benefit of both the U n i o n as a whole and the students at Wye, and the on-going consultation s h o u l d make sure that this continues to be the case.

Felix has learnt that College is in the process of disposing of another of the residences there - Coldharbour House - in order to raise funds. It is not yet k n o w n h o w this, combined w i t h the increase in lett i n g accommodation to nonstudents, w i l l affect the Provost's planned increases in student numbers. Alex

from

The launch of the first stage of U L U ' s electronic v o t i n g process on 4 M a r c h is due to be attended by Robin Cook M P Leader of the House of Commons, who is a supporter of introducing similar technology to future parliamentary ballots following the s m a l l turnout at the 2001 General Election. This year's local elections w i l l give the electorate the option of voting electronically for the first time. More information about the U L U elections is available at www.ulu.lon.ac.uk. John S

Issue

1229

22 F e b r u a r y 2002 A c t i n g Editor: A l i Wren N e w s : A l e x Coby Reporter: John Stratford Books: J o n M a t t h e w s A r t s : J o n Brenner Film: Darius N i k b i n Sports: Vacant Crossword: Dr. Hot Fudge Comic: J W i t h Thanks To: Joe, Dave, Bobby Printed by: MCP Litho Limited Felix, Beit Quad, Prince Consort Road, London, SW7 2BB Tel: 020 7594 8072 Email: felix@ic.ac.uk Felix is a registered newspaper: ISSN 1040 - 0711 Copyright ÂŠ Felix 2002

News In Brief

Preliminary negotiations are underway between the authorities at Wye and the N H S to provide accommodation for nurses on campus. The current p l a n involves the letting of one or t w o buildings to the N H S for this purpose, a n d g i v i n g the n u r s e s full access to the bars a n d sports facilities.

In other news

d i s t r i b u t e d w i t h i n the next t w o weeks. U L U successfully piloted its online voting scheme last year, and this year's U L U sabbaticals were the first people in the U K to be elected to public positions by an electronic poll.

Wye,

N U S R e f e r e n d u m Date Set A date has n o w been set for the referendum on Imperial College Union's affiliation to the National Union of Students. The poll w i l l take place on 14 and 15 M a r c h in all departments. The referendum w i l l require a turnout of 15% (around 1800 students) i n order for it to be v a l i d . C a m p a i n i n g from b o t h the 'Yes' and 'No' camps is expected to begin in earnest after the imminent sabbatical elections. B o' Selecta Boanerges, one of the mascots of City and G u i l d s College, featured recently on local radio station B B C London following its appearance at a dinner held at the official City residence of the Lord Mayor of

London to thank all of those w h o entered the Lord Mayor's Show in November. Bo', w h i c h reaches the age of 100 this year, took part in the annual Veteran Car Club Run from L o n d o n to Brighton in the same month, in w h i c h the Rector, Sir Richard Sykes rode in the vintage car to personally deliver a message from the L o r d Mayor to the Mayor of Brighton and Hove. The event at M a n s i o n H o u s e w a s an opportunity for Bo' to deliver a reply. One of the presenters, resident architect Prof. M a x w e l l Hutchinson, h a d infuriated the engineers b y calling City and Guilds College an institution of "typists," during his commentary of the show. John S

news world

World News Shootings Four m e n a n d a pregnant w o m a n were fired u p o n b y members of the Parachute Regiment this w e e k i n a n unfortunate incident that may mark a turning point in the fortunes of the i n t e r n a t i o n a l peacekeeping forces of Afghanistan. The six soldiers concerned, part of the seventeen-nation International Security Assistance Force (ISAF), were stationed i n a command post on top of a grain silo at the time of the shooting, w h i c h took place o n Sunday e v e ni ng . Hearing gunfire and, apparently, bullets striking the walls around them, the leader of the party decided that the noises provided sufficient evidence of a "close and immediate" threat. Under their U N approved Rules Of

Engagement, the soldiers then opened fire for a period of approximately one minute, during w h i c h time over 100 rounds were fired. One m a n w a s killed i n the incident, while t w o others suffered minor injuries. The w o m a n - on her w a y to hospital at the time - delivered a baby i n a nearby house some hours later. The paras involved were taken off patrol, i n accordance w i t h M o D policy, while t w o - the corporal leading the section a n d one other m a n flew home on Tuesday. Speaking for the Ministry of Defence, a spokesman insisted that the m e n h a d at all times acted in accordance w i t h A r m y policy, adding, " W h e n you're under fire from a n u n k n o w n direction, i t ' s really a very scary thing. You make very sure that y o u establish where

the shots are c o m i n g from before y o u do anthmg else, otherwise if y o u stick your head up it's likely to get shot off." He added that "the shots fired must have come from the direction of [the victims' car]. They may w e l l have got caught in an unlucky crossfire."

terrorism he refers to as a " w a r " - described North Korea, along w i t h Iraq a n d Iran, as representing a n "axis of evil" from w h i c h the "forces of terrorism.. . g a m support and sustenance for their wicked deeds."

A full joint investigation b y the Royal Military Police a n d Afghan security forces is currently underway.

South Korea are worried that Bush's remarks may hinder or even d a m a g e attempts at reunification. Korea w a s split into t w o countries following the Korean War in the last cen-

However, many in North and

B u s h In Korea George Bush this week visited South Korea as part of a tour over the next fortnight of the Pacific R i m countries of A s i a . The visit w a s expected to cause controversy, however, because of his remarks earlier on this year in his State Of The Union address. A t the time, the US president - referring the US-led efforts to control global

tury - regarded b y many as the first real (successful) test of the nascent United Nations. This year the richer, capitalist South plays co-host to t h e F I F A World C u p w i t h Japan, a n d native pundits and businesses are hoping the event w i l l promote Korean values, culture and standing to the world. Joe

Knowledge i s o f two k i n d s . We know a s u b j e c t o u r s e l v e s , or we know where we can f i n d i n f o r m a t i o n upon i t . Samuel Author,

Johnson (1709-1784), lexicographer

Wye Campus, JCR Union Building 6:30pm Tuesday, February 26

South Kensington, dBs Club Bar 6pm Wednesday, February 27

[) Sabbatical Elections w

••• coNege nninn

Should Imperial College Union affiliate to the National Union of Students (NUS)? Yes / No

You Choose

NUS Referendum - Voting 14 and 15 March For more information check outwww.union.ic.ac.uk or contact Sen Ganesh (president@ic.ac.uk)

Le g r e a t t h i n g about democracy i s that i t gives every v o t e r a chance t o do somethin g s t u p i d . Art

Spander,

Columnist

6;30pm/Tuesday, F e b r u a r y 26 Wye Campus,

JCR Union Building,

6:30pm

6;00pm/Wednesday, F e b r u a r y 27 South Kensington

Campus,

dBs Club Bar, 6:00pm

10-5:OOpm/Thursday, F e b r u a r y 28 10-5:00pm/Friday, M a r c h 1 12 noon/Monday, M a r c h 4 South Kensington

Campus,

Union Dining Hall

How to Vote To vote, you will need your Imperial College Identification (Swipe) card. You are permitted to vote once in your O W N department. See www.su.ic.ac.uk/elections for more information.

Sabbatical Elections

arts feature

From The Ashes Phoenix is the A r t a n d Literature magazine of the college. It is published once a year in the summer term, but here's a selection of the material that has b e e n submitted so far. This year, Phoenix w i l l also contribute to a w e e k long exhibition as part of the A r t s Festival w e e k (February 25th - M a r c h 1st). It offers a chance for members of the college to have their stories, photos, paintings and poems p u b l i s h e d a n d displayed around college. If you w o u l d like to contribute please e-mail claire.trippl@ic.ac.uk. Apology

Matrix Welcome. Welcome To a w o r l d Because To a w o r l d Because To a w o r l d

to the w o r l d they made for you. without pain. your nerves have been cut. without want. your desires have been removed. without hate.

Because your fury has been suppressed. Never more to be lost.

Let me not i n the w o r k i n g s of my m i n d Profess consistency. Life is not life W h i c h sees success and chooses to be kind Or works to ease the never e n d i n g strife.

Because they k n o w exactly where you are. Never more to be unloved. A s they strip your m i n d of resistance. Never more to fear. A s the truth is kept from you. No more nightmares. No more dreams. No more sorrow. No more joy. This is the b e g i n n i n g of your n e w life.

O no it is the never fixed mark, A s sullied as the average canteen c u p Filled w i t h pain, torment a n d thoughts ever dark W i t h one fixed truth - sometimes people just screw up. Sense lost, grammar a veritable sea Coherence ripped a n d s t r i p p e d no more to be. So if this coursework's crap a n d from me marks that takes Please note w e learn the most from our mistakes...

You are already dead.

George Hale

Andrew

Prowse

eare s f

HAMLET 26th, 27th, 28th February and 1st March Imperial College Concert Hall Union Building, Beit Quad, South Kensington

Tickets on sale at lunchtimes from the BMS Building, St. Mary's, and IC Union e-mail msh97ic.ac.uk to reserve

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talk union

Harvard, MIT or Imperial? A N o t e b y Sen G a n e s h , U n i o n President One of the key issues that has come to the fore recently is the number of applications to Imperial. Some of you may have read in the press and m e d i a that there has been a w o r r y i n g trend i n a reduction of applications for university science courses. Some of this has in part been attributed to an increasing mistrust in science. This has also been compounded in recent years by the Foot and M o u t h crisis a n d the British Beef fiasco.

tution w i t h great resources and some of the most talented students to be found

Fewer and fewer students are studying science and maths at A - L e v e l and applying for science and engineering subjects. Imperial College, b e i n g a specialist institution focusing on science, technology and medicine w i l l face the brunt of it. In effect the market for good students is shrinking and the competition b e t w e e n the top Universities w i l l get ever more fierce. So w h a t is College going to do to combat this? Firstly the College must maintain itself as a w o r l d leader in teaching and research. We are a world-class insti-

anywhere. Whatever the College does to address these problems, it is important that w e must not compromise our position as a leading institute and lower standards. . One of the key strategies as outlined by

the Rector in his recent talk, is to improve the image of Imperial College. Whilst the College is w e l l k n o w n is scientific circles it is not as renowned as the Harvards or the MITs of the w o r l d . Improving the image w i l l attract help attract the best students and staff to maintain our h i g h standards. Another short-term effect might be an increase in the proportion of international students. There is still a large number of high calibre international students who w a n t to study in the U K but this in itself is not a long-term solution. There are other w a y s in w h i c h the College can address this problem. The College has a w e l l developed programme of promoting science to the younger generation in the hope of attracting more people towards science. Whatever happens there is going to be a change in the culture of the College - w e are entering a n e w age of competition and modernisation to establish our status as a world-class institute.

Imperial F r i d a y

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Imperial College U n i o n C h o i r Hatch end High School Chamber Choir Imperial College S y m p h o n y O r c h e s t r a Tickets E7 / ÂŁ 3 . 5 0 students. Tickets available on the door, or in advance from Miss Ainslee Rutledgt room IVILBOa, Blyth Music and A r t s Centre, or reserve online at http: \ \ www.su.ic.acuk \ choir

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union talk

IC Radio IC Radio's Science at Six is home to the Vagina Monologues, home-cooking your o w n a p h r o d i s i a c s , a n d psychological insights to help y o u w i n friends a n d get t h e m into b e d . B u t is t h i s Science? W e t h i n k s o . Y o u c a n tune i n to enjoy t h e s h o w every T u e s d a y at 6 p m for an hour of d e l i g h t a n d e n l i g h t enment. So w h o p r o d u c e s this excellent magazine programme, full of d r a m a , w i t a n d fresh facts from t h e w o r l d of S c i e n c e ? W e l l , t w o teams from Imperial's Science M e d i a Production course compete to create a n hour of s c i e n c e - t a l k a n d

r a g e d a g a i n s t t h e status q u o that if your a p p l i c a t i o n lacks b y t r a c k i n g d o w n science's the correct k e y w o r d s , t h e most controversial characcomputer scanning your ters. neatly w o r d - p r o c e s s e d episWe get our k i c k s from taktle w i l l b i n it before t h e h u m a n resources h u m a n as i n g a l o p - s i d e d v i e w of scim u c h as casts their eyes over ence a n d if you're g u t t e d to it! R e a l h e a d - h u n t e r s feahave m i s s e d any, w e archive tured i n a book r e v i e w - i t s e v e r y s e c o n d of w h a t w e amazing what people w i l l broadcast at The stuff w e t h r o w into the collect - a n d they d i d not icradio.com/relive, just scroll show each week depends even have formaldehyde at back to the last T u e s d a y a n d entirely on the w h i m of the we're there for y o u to click, p r o d u c t i o n t e a m but as w e the time. Not only that, but l i s t e n a n d enjoy! b r o a d c a s t a n y t h i n g u p to t e n we've k i t t e d up i n h i g h - t e c h clothes a n d items i n the hour, w e g u a r a n - m o t o r - b i k i n g h o s t e d our very o w n B l i n d tee there'll be s o m e t h i n g for The Science At Six Show hapDate for lovelorn M a r i e C u r i e . you. pens at 6-7pm on Tuesdays We've h a d far o u t a n i m a l In t h e last f e w w e e k s , s o u n d effects, interviews Science at Six has brought w i t h real s c i e n t i s t s a n d a few you careers a d v i c e from a that we've just made u p a n d head-hunter w h o warned www.icradio.com (u

m u s i c e v e r y other w e e k . E a c h t e a m tries to outdo the other i n their drive to b r i n g you a fresh, upfront science pr o g r am m e that's more Five L i v e t h a n R a d i o 4, more C h a n n e l 4 t h a n B B C 2, w i t h a fast m o v i n g format to carry you from six to seven.

icradio,

Applications

are invited

for positions

REAPPLICANTS

Part-Time Staff Needed

F A L M O U T H KEOGH HALL

Union staff needed to work in the Shop and Bars. Many variable hours available. 0

A p p l i c a t i o n s are invited f r o m lively, o u t g o i n g a n d r e s p o n s i b l e students for positions as r e a p p l i c a n t s in F a l m o u t h K e o g h Hall f o r t h e 2 0 0 2 - 2 0 0 3 a c a d e m i c year.

g Application f o r m s are available from the A c c o m m o d a t i o n Office, 15 P r i n c e s G a r d e n s , o r F a l m o u t h Keogh Wardens/Subwardens.

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Work for yourself. Work at the Union... ..and make a difference to your social life

Completed application forms should be returned to either the A c c o m m o d a t i o n Office or t o one of the F K W a r d e n s / S u b w a r d e n s by M o n d a y 4 t h M a r c h 2 0 0 2 at 5 p m

back talk Condom-nation? Dear person w h o wrote last w e e k ' s Inkwell, If o b t a i n i n g condoms is embarrassing to you then are you really mature enough to be u s i n g them? The offering of free condoms has to be controlled for various reasons but the first of t h e m is the law. It is illegal to encourage underage sex in any w a y a n d as it is possible for U16s to use the h e a l t h centre, a form w i t h date of b i r t h details must be used. Secondly, I have u s e d the service for 4 years and have never found it embarrassing, just a useful service. Is society so repressed w e can't admit the n e e d for safe sex? F i n a l l y some religious groups o p p o s e the i d e a of c o n t r a c e p t i o n a n d therefore on d i s p l a y to-be-taken condoms could cause these people offence w h i c h stops the health centre b e i n g for all. I do hope however that you don't find u s i n g condoms as embarrassing as you s e e m to find o b t a i n i ng them. Yours, Jolyon Thompson, Aero

Dear Editor, Inkwell has a point (Condom Bureaucracy - Felix 8 February 2002) so to speak. Here at the Health Centre w e w o u l d dearly love to leave buckets of condoms l y i n g around for eager students to carry away. Indeed, w e d i d give 2500 condoms to I C S U to distribute during Freshers' Week, hopefully p r o m o t i n g safe sex. Unfortunately, s u c h gestures of largesse are c o n s t r a i n e d by... The H e a l t h Authority. It is Kensington, Chelsea and Westminster H e a l t h A u t h o r i t y who give the condoms to local

practices to distribute free to their patients and w e get our share. A l t h o u g h this is more t h a n other l o c a l p r a c t i c e s , because there is recognition that w e serve a student population, it is not enough for students to take as many as they w a n t . This is w h y w e have to l i m i t the n u m b e r that are given to each i n d i v i d u a l . Furthermore, i n order to qualify for this supply of condoms w e have to provide statistics to the H e a l t h Authority on the gender and ages of those w h o request them. The simplest, most economic and efficient w a y of doing this is to enter the d a t a on to p a t i e n t s ' records a n d t h e n s e a r c h for it. H e n c e the request forms. The request forms do provide confidentiality for students or w o u l d it be less embarrassing to stand at the Reception desk aski ng for "6 naturelle please". I am dismayed, yet strangely impressed, b y Inkwell's claim to be responsible for Britain's h i g h rate of u n w a n t e d pregnancies. A more appropriate assessment w o u l d be to examine the u n w a n t e d pregnancy rate at Imperial College compared to other universities, particularly those w h i c h do not offer free c o n d o m s . This is reassuringly low, presumably either because I n k w e l l is active elsewhere or, more likely, b e c a u s e the majority of students think that filling i n a form is a small price to pay for condoms. Yours faithfully, Irene Weinreb

NUS Dear Felix, President

G a n e s h gave the reason i n his letter to Felix for h o l d i n g a referendum that lots of freshers a s k e d for N U S

cards this year. If this is the reason can I ask w h y there hasn't b e e n a referendum before?? In the t w o years I spent in halls as fresher then re-app many people queried w h y Imperial w a s not in the NUS. The reason for a s k i n g the questions w a s not because N U S colleges provide cheaper beer or food, or that N U S membership w o u l d ensure a better union. I w o u l d like to guess that most wanted Imperial to join the N U S so they could have a N U S card and get discounts at H M V and the cinema. So, w h y should Imperial join the NUS? P o l i t i c a l l y it w o u l d be a bonus: it is a w e l l k n o w n secret that whoever becomes president of the N U S mysteriously ends up w o r k i n g at W e s t m i n s t e r w i t h i n a few years. A l s o colleges have to declare a political allegiance upon entry. H o w e v e r Imperial has been apolitical ever since the events of the sixties w h e n political factions of the college created havoc. Only last year the Felix editor w a s brought i n front of the c o u n c i l for his political v i e w s w i t h i n Felix. On an administration level it w o u l d give the U n i o n extra clout on certain issues d e e m e d i m p o r t a n t s u c h as fees etc. But w o u l d help on external issues be exchanged for a devolution of internal powers to the NUS?? O n the catering side b e i n g part of the N U S cartel w o u l d help to ensure the procurement of cheap beer and food. H o w e v e r s u c h cartels exist within college including strong links w i t h breweries built up over the years: Has anyone else noticed that the prices for alcohol and hot food in Southside and the U n i o n are cheaper t h a n U L U and most of the other L o n d o n NUS

unions? If w e were to enter the N U S cartel w h a t w o u l d happen to the selection of real ales for instance - w o u l d the prices increase a n d the choice diminish? H o w e v e r it might enable p e o p l e to acquire Stella on the South Ken campus. T h e n w e move onto the cost. To join the N U S requires a yearly joining fee r u n n i n g into tens of thousands. G i v e n the current financial situation of the U n i o n I w o u l d be interested to see w h e r e this money is to come from. Perhaps from improving the efficiency of the central administration? I doubt it. Last year the club f u n d i n g w a s cut severely, w i t h arts clubs b e i n g hit as w e l l as sports teams (if anyone can suggest h o w to fit 17 rugby players into a mi nibus plus kit w i t h o u t exceeding the w e i g h t limit please tell me). The s u m m e r b a l l is nearly scrapped due to lack of funding: yet the U n i o n can afford the membership - how? A t this point I w o u l d like to point out that I have no g r u d g e s w i t h the N U S : at sixth form I h e l p e d usher the college u n i o n into the NUS. Only there the fee w a s considerably smaller a n d d i d not affect the student activities. I also agree that IC students are d i s c r i m i n a t e d u p o n b y h i g h street retailers because w e do not have N U S cards. Surely that should be w h a t the college should be camp a i g n i n g for. In p l a c i n g the opportunity to get N U S cards certain people in the U n i o n are d a n g l i n g a huge carrot in front of the students they represent. H o w e v e r , four years at Imperial have taught me that wherever a carrot is dangled, a dirty great b i g stick is not too far away. Regards, Simon C h i l d (Phys IV)

The Union will be hosting an open discussion led by the Union President, Sen Ganesh, concerning the evening activities held at the Union. This will be held in meeting room 7B in the lower level of the East Wing of the Union Building, Beit Quad, l-2pm, Monday, March 4. Opinions are being sought on the nights held at the Union; especially the type, frequency, costs and variety, among any other concerns you may have about the Union.

Friday Rag Ball School Uniform day, today, for R A G w e e k . O l d school ties, short plaid skirts, jumpers for goalposts, not in my day, then party at the Union. Union, 8pm

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Imperial College Union. Belt Quad, Prince Consort Road

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ABV Some d r i n k i n g . Some more drinking. It's not necessarily a drinking club, but maybe it is. A n d some old skool tunes. L i k e Aciiieeeed! dBs, 6pm

Monsters, Inc. M a n y w i l l be surprised to hear that this is the top film in Britain at the moment, but then many are s u r p r i s e d by that springy w o r m s in jars gag, so you never know.

Union Concert Hall Shallow Hall Not about a s w i m m i n g pool, but really about a fat bloke, w h o goes out w i t h a fat bird, w h o he sees as thin, or somet h i n g egually propsterous. Arse, more like.

Gould i be time to see Yetr . t h i n k it - i s ' - Oh h o w many cflanneis are w h a t u . H o w cool J . silly >. People w i l l flock show, , nig at t:o ! ' ray w i s d o m , ,.m for ' . M I ,'- Idon't:" ItHQW not. w a t c h i n g Uiem? whi i ia.n.eway is... Sky One, bpn; 1

'. )b by Discov i i Sii William Ramsey. The name •• from the Greek w o r d hellos (sun), and is used for p sea

Bananarama D i d you see w h a t I just wrote? W h y are you still here? You should be on the phone even as w e speak, booking your tickets... w e l l , move! Astoria

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Deep P u r p l e H o w very very very very very cool. D u m d u m dummm, dum dum dumd u m . These guys are older than your grandfather, and still rocking. London Apollo H'Smith

5pm •

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Gigs & Concerts

Every Wednesday

They'. they'n this cevent a lot a

Noble Gases

Television & Radio

Work for yourself. Work at the Union... and make a difference to your social life.

At The Movies

Student Activities

Karma

All are welcome, whether you come to the Union often or not at all. Your opinion matters.

•

This Week

Open Invitation

Union Events

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Monday Arts Festival A festival of arts, perhaps? Taking over dBs for the entire afternoon/evening, w i t h arts stuff. If you like arts, you'll like this. dBs, 2pm 'til late. L e o n a r d o Society

Tuesday Trivia O n c e more unto the breach, dear friends. W h a t ' s the c a p i t a l of Outer Mongolia? W h a t was the date of Gladstone's Bag? Da Vinci's, 8-ish.

Wednesday Thursday Cheesy Wotsits Words fail to describe this e x t r a v a g a n z a of delight. People return from matches to commiserate or celebrate, and then get drunk. Yus. Union, For Ever

Links head Learn to be a first aid '1 lie-, 'II h•}.':••;•/.'. , trainer Train to be a first tK,"> fie: lag th« i ntel who will be d r a w i n g , aid learner The perrau- IfiCI aft! mii.'jr,!. J> ' . S T ] , painting and sculpting •:,•!' ion: ire ton grea to y p n g . fotilbe opptirtuiaiwith ail materials profit ! 1 I O I o But go ...i u 1 !.' 1'. t;. .M i. vu led for only £3 learn how to save lives blow Die die die!!! 3-13. Huxley. 7pm U P - Base wni 7i .-.-• brow ,i, ' hvon, '•{'•'•> :

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Comedy

Shaft! you're W u k k a w u k k a w u k k a funny, do you? Luckily w u k k a . That's a w a - w a w e ' l l never find out, p e d a l . V u c k a V R O W ! because w e get profes- A n d t h a t ' s a p o w e r sionals in. Tony L a w is chord. Together they are this week's victim. 70's music. Pow! dBs, 7:30pm Union, 8pm So

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Rat Race If you l i k e d A i r p l a n e , you'll probably like this, but t h e n y o u ' d also probably like a complimentary lobotomy. Come to my office for your free trial.

The P r i n c e s s Diaries Iris I remain convinced that Sadly not an in-depth this w i l l be a reworking documentary on the fasof Pygmalion, but hav- cinating subject that is i n g not seen it, I have no the h u m a n visual organ, right to comment. Not but instead about Iris that that w i l l stop me, of Murdoch: she's not even course. H a ha ha. related to the A-Team...

Star. Trek. V o y a g ei= I can't believe how w e l l i his is going- hero is , .in.. i - , . .••,!i.-ii, ni from tlio fourth quadrant ..; J • •• galaxy they're iri. '. Sky One, hprn

M < > - -gxgk \ V o y >• iii • Star 'Tr ek ; V o y a g e r ;. S t a r T r e k V o y a g e r While ii i;J si.iJl on on Sky P a m m i t . . . B a c k to Sky ivj; yoii !•.!''!.; |0 iVl'/IKJ One at 5pm, I feel it is One I'm beginning to with the old fa n ;u,o<:wo: .} pointf.g • • it that ffiihk they've g o l S J i e a - e an /o.i- imagine < day it v:i also or; some other ;sail. y o i. > g. B i u;; life least. thai •< i n, j ; « i wiliu Dl channels as well, just to this. o i i f ' s s? a different !h.'. :<\ l t"'.. I ir • really screw your mind thru- • rhfit s i )K. : [)(>riljj (._! ' I ' ,( 1,1 / BBC2, 6.20pm 3ty}One^Midttight Sky Om 5pm

Ben A n d Jason

Black Rebel Motorcycle Richard Hawley Club Bloke from Pulp and The But I have heard these Longpigs crooning away g u y s , a n d one of my in a poppy kind of fashmuso friends t o l d me ion, maybe slightly they were like someone. rocky poppy, come to Jesus and M a r y Chain? think of it, choppy! The Mean Fiddler Cargo

D r o w n i n g Pool BuffSeeds No idea, but you might Similar emotions on this have heard of them. one, but again may be They're the only people w o r t h a l i s t e n . Some on today, so that's w h y chap here says they're they're here. They might average. So I probably be really good! wouldn't bother, then. M e a n Fiddler Monarch

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Bastard Sir William Ramsey also discovered this in 1898, and named ii norn the Greek word kryptos (hidden). Used fat fo lighting (surprise surprise).

Hurrah! Discoverered by idn i Era i Dorn w 'I'-., tht i frit original'! . from i hi oJement radium mti v. used i n - ittn "ut .,) oaru ei in , il mined from radium.

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Similar to Belle a n d Sebastian, but with slightly less pretentious names. Okay, I admit, I s h o u l d have h e a r d of them but I haven't. Fine. Hanover Grand

From Hell

Vanilla Sky I guite like the sound of Not quite as catchy as this film, but since I've his cousin, Mr. Ice, this been rude about all the film is about a failed rapother films, I have to be per w h o w a s the son of fair and say that this is some hippies, born into p r o b a b l y a b i g h a i r y the w o r l d of flower load of bollocks. power. Not really.

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election special

How To Vote: A Quick Guide On the following pages, all the election candidates present their manifestoes, and have been interviewed by Felix. First, David Francis - Deputy President (Education & Welfare) and Returning Officer - introduces the system by which you will vote next week. The posters are up, the manifestoes have b e e n s u b m i t t e d , the c a n d i d a t e s have been grilled by a n over-enthusiastic Felix reporter and paraded in front of a television camera so that the whole J C R can see w h a t they have to say. You k n o w w h i c h the departments the candidates are from, you've heard w h a t they've contributed towards the u n i o n over the last few years and you've been stunned by arcane titles for clubs a n d societies that you never even k n e w e x i s t e d. You've nearly sussed the candidates out. N o w you're looking. L o o k i n g for reasons either to vote for, or, indeed, like the majority of voters, to not vote, for a particular candidate. You have an impression in your m i n d . You k n o w w h a t they look like. You k n o w w h a t they s o u n d like. You k n o w the r a s h g e n e r a l i s a t i o n s you've

made about them, either good or bad, that you w i s h you hadn't. You've spoken to people in your hall, in your clubs, to that girl your mate pulled last Wednesday night. You've even spoken to your departmental representatives, as they're likely to actually have b u m p e d into some of the candidates, at some stage. So n o w w h a t ? N o w you have to vote. Sounds easy, huh? Sounds like this article is going to patronise you beyond comprehension? I w i s h it w a s that simple. First things first. You vote w i t h a s w i p e card. Not a U n i o n card, or an Activities card, or a U L U card or indeed a NUS card. A s w i p e card. The t h i n g that lets you into the computer room, but you can never be bothered to d i g it out of your wallet and so there it sits. You also need to be in the right place at the right time. You cannot vote at any ballot box you turn up at. You must vote i n your o w n department. If you turn up elsewhere, you w i l l be informed of where you should be voting and politely told to head i n that direction. There w i l l be no exceptions. Once there, b e t w e e n the hours of 10am and 5pm on both Thursday 28th February

You could say that a large group of individuals is an impossible concept; alternatively you could work for one.

Ylarakon Associates strategic m a n a g e m e n t consultants

Your time starts now

www.marakon.com

and Friday 1st M a r c h , you w i l l be presented w i t h five bits of paper: One for each of the sabbatical positions. O n each piece of paper, w h i c h w i l l be colour coordinated for your benefit, there w i l l be a list of candidates s t a n d i n g for each position. There w i l l also be R O N (Re-open nomination). For instance, for the position of President, there w i l l be, i n alphabetical order, Stuart Davies, Sen G a n e s h , Idris H a r d i n g and R O N . You w i l l then be required to vote b y the Single Transferable Vote system. In a nutshell, your first choice gets one m i l vote, and if they don't w i n , your other preferences are reflected. You put a '1' next to the candidate you w a n t to w i n . You put a '2' next to the person you w o u l d class as your second choice and so on. If you put a '1' next to R O N , all other numbers w i l l be ignored. If you only like one candidate, and there are more t h a n 2 candidates standing, put "2" next to R O N . You see h o w this is working? Lovely. So there w e go. No ticks, no crosses, no ripped ballot papers and no silly pictures next to candidate's names. So get out there and V O T E V O T E V O T E . Ishra!

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manifestoes election

Candidate Manifestoes President

BAG

I w i l l start a drive to improve all services for students, whether they are provided by the Union or b y College. Both catering services need to improve i n quality and reduce in price. The installation of a c a s h machine i n the m a i n b u i l d i n g , the introduction of card sales a n d the increased use of the Great Hall for live performances can only enhance the Union. Investigating College's health

President Changes i n government fundi n g a n d the "London Factor" have led to increasing pressures for students. M y goal is to build on the advice and support services a n d put student hardship high on the agenda.

provisions, both mental a n d physical, and developing their provisions for students w i t h special needs w i l l help to make a lot of students better off. I w i l l work to ensure the retention and quality of all departmental and site libraries.

I w i l l remove pointless forms, cut the number of administrative hoops that club chairs have to jump through and stop debate on the U n i o n constitution. I w i l l get people w h o run the Union to focus on their jobs instead of their C V ' s .

Outside College, I w i l l campaign on student debt, increase the number of companies that give student discounts to IC students and continue the attempts to allow the U n i o n to issue student LT cards.

The Union is meant to be an open and democratic organisation, responding to the needs of all students. I w i l l ensure that it is. After all, if it is not working constantly to improve things for each and every stu-

I w i l l cut Union bureaucracy.

teaching and research. One of the biggest challenges facing the Union is how w e help and support students at the many campuses. I w i l l dedicate greater resources to integrating the sites, improve communication and ensure that decisions are taken where they are most effective.

demic a n d administrative make-up of College. The Union has to ensure education remains a priority and that w e

I believe the U n i o n must expand clubs, societies and student activities, and support the many volunteers that help the Union. A d d i t i o n a l l y I w o u l d ensure the U n i o n plays a

continue to be a world leader in

greater role in helping students

The changes in College structure have transformed the aca-

on what is served i n the bars, h o w much the shop charges for a paper clip or whether the hockey team wins or loses.

Friday entertainment programmes to compete w i t h other London unions. Together w i t h the permanent staff I w i l l encourage and make it easier for students to get involved w i t h running all union services. The structures for this already exist; I don't anticipate any major policy changes, just a change in emphasis and publicity to put you in control.

The union needs a time of stability, good management, focussing on w h a t students want. I w i l l concentrate on building up the Wednesday and

The only structural issue for the union this year is its failure to recognise that IC is a multicampus institution. A s a medic no longer based at South Ken I

President I don't w a n t to change the structure of the union - too much time has been wasted on this i n recent years. What the constitution says has no effect

dent, whatever campus they attend, it is not doing its job.

find affordable accommodation. The Union must continue to provide value-for-money services and develop long-term plans to meet the needs of the students. A s President this year, I have gained the experience a n d skills necessary to achieve my goals. The Union has achieved a lot, but there is more to do. We must build on the successes and improve services. I w i l l make sure that the Union continues to take the initiative, is accountable to the students it represents and provides practical and tangible benefits for all.

have an accurate perspective on this problem. I C U needs presence at the major London campuses as a minimum. I have the experience from running last year's summer ball to transform h o w the union runs without changing regulations, avoiding protracted debate. I managed to revolutionise the summer ball last year, turning it from a failing institution in danger of extinction into an event c o m m a n d i n g a 20k subsidy from college. A s union president I w i l l endeavor to complete a similar feat.

election manifestoes

Candidate Manifestoes Deputy President

(Fin

>r»o« &

Services)

The Deputy President Finances a n d Services (DPFS) is not only responsible for just the Union's money but he or she is also responsible for the bars, the U n i o n shops, the catering a n d the U n i o n minibuses. The role of the DPFS effects all aspects of student life w i t h i n the college. This is w h y I believe that DPFS one of the most important positions i n the Union.

Deputy PresideWflf^Mie

* Services)

Justin Rodger - Who is that you may think? L e t me introduce myself, this year I a m standing for DP(F&S). I a m a final year physics student, member of bar staff and a union treasurer. W h y I a m standing? Well, i n my opinion it's the best w a y anyone could spend a year of their university life and I think more people should stand. If elected some issues I w o u l d like to pursue: After m u c h c o n s t r u c t i o n

Deputy President

•

• > *4 •

(Finance

Services)

The union has seen many large changes this year. I believe that the n e w exec need to be able to spot teething problems in the n e w structure, a n d react to them before they become large issues. I believe that I a m able to do this. The DP F & S role is split into t w o parts, and a competent DP F & S needs to have experience in both those roles. During my year out I worked as a Team Leader. M y team and I were responsible, in part, for

It is critical for the Union to provide these services i n an efficient and effective manner. M y m a i n objective as DPFS w o u l d be to provide value for money to the students that use the services of the Union, for increasing the variety of drink promotions at the bar and u s i n g debit cards i n the union for food a n d drink. It is important for the students to have an input i n the w a y that these services are run. A s the Chair of the Overseas Students C o m m i t t e e I w a s responsible for m a n a g i n g the

financial affairs of 30 Societies and organising major events such as International Night. I am a member of the U n i o n Council, the governing body of the Union. I have also been a society president a n d last year sat on the B u d g e t A d v i s o r y G r o u p (BAG). I have seen h o w the Union is run from various different levels. If elected, I w i l l a i m to improve the standard of the Union's services to meet the needs of the students on all sites.

work, the union building needs a face lift to remove years of dirt & grime and restore the building to. its former glory, sufficiently so to warrant exterior illumination. Provide online minibus booking a n d guides for people w h o run the union. Internally, u n i o n resources such as room usage should be efficient and encourage sabbaticals to participate i n club activities as members. Concerning current issues, of course I w o u l d support the student body decision on the N.U.S. referendum.

What makes me suitable for this position is m y attitude and experience. The resources of the union should be efficiently used a n d should offer maxim u m benefit to greatest number a n d as DP(F&S) I w o u l d play a major role i n this. I've spent years in the bar on both sides, I've h e l p e d r u n the finances of clubs as a treasurer and union officer a n d w o u l d like to take a more active role in union life. W h y should you vote for me? Simple, because you think I w o u l d do the best job.

reacting to people's difficulties within the work place; both recommending more training where necessary and changing protocols around the office if required. I believe that this is valuable experience for the Services part of the role. Outside term time, I work for a financial temp agency, w h i c h means that I have spent time in many of the large financial companies in this country a n d around the world. I believe this is valuable for the post.

to improve. For example, at the moment students c a n provide feedback to the union, by filling in a form, w h i c h is handed to the bar staff. O n several occasions I have heard people complain that either no-one has got back to them, or are not happy w i t h what they have heard. I also think that the day-to-day role of the sabbaticals is not very w e l l understood by the student body. Several people that I've spoken to don't know what a sabb is, let alone what their jobs are and h o w us and the union benefit from them.

If I am elected, then there are several things that I would aim

manifestoes election

^ ^ 1 5

Candidate Manifestoes Felix

Edm It is difficult for me to write a manifesto, since the issues of Felix that I have edited this year are far better evidence of how I like to work than anything I can write here. While I do intend to make significant changes to the layout a n d design next year, I think that the experience I have gained over the last year w i l l mostly benefit the administration of Felix, w h i c h in turn w i l l benefit the students. I have a good knowledge of h o w the

Felix Editor Throughout my t w o years at Imperial, I have been a regular contributor to Felix. This year, I spend 15-20 hours per week working as music editor, and I also have overall responsibility for the n e w clubbing section. I have written and edited various other articles a n d dealt w i t h advertisers. I present shows on IC Radio for six hours each week, I am a member of IC Symphony Orchestra and I have also been

Felix Editor Y o u d be forgiven for thinking Imperial College is the most dull place on Earth. Actually, there's a lot of stuff going on and there's a free magazine you c a n look i n to find out about it all. That's the theory. What w e n t wrong? Felix ought to be the face a n d t h e voice of Imperial College. It ought to be somet h i n g w e pick up on a Friday because it's interesting, entert a i n i n g a n d relevant. But

Union and College work, w h i c h w i l l help me negotiate the politics of both, and thus write better news. I understand h o w to get more money out of corporate advertisers, w h i c h means I w i l l be able to lower the cost of advertising for clubs a n d societies within the Union. More specifically I intend to expand on the success of Coffee Break, w h i c h seem to be the most popular pages, and so give yet more room to fun things to do during lectures. I want to have a greater connection w i t h Phoenix, thus getting

more art a n d culture into Felix on a regular basis, and I w i l l continue trying to get more students from non-central campuses involved i n both content and news. I also plan to make the diary larger, as it seems to be gaining popularity, filling it w i t h more that is useful, as w e l l as more that is silly. Finally, I think that a second year w o u l d allow me to do things that I have not have had the capacity to do up until now, thus making Felix more entertaining to read and more fun to write.

heavily involved in several R A G

put full, uncut versions of interviews, reviews and letters on the site.

events this year. I will continue to run Felix as a newspaper, but I will include more national and international news, and more sport. College news w i l l remain on the front page, and I w i l l extend the popular Coffee Break section. The diary section w i l l become a useful guide to the week, featuring detailed listings and previews.

I w i l l make Felix more professional, both i n appearance and as an organization i n general. More news and features relating to Wye, Silwood a n d the medic campuses are needed, and I hope to get more students from these campuses involved w i t h Felix.

I w i l l put College news on the Felix website as it breaks, so that you don't have to wait until Friday to find out about important developments. I w i l l also

I am committed, experienced, reliable, w e l l organized a n d enthusiastic. Felix is a good newspaper this year, but I will make it better.

instead w e have pages of waffle about nothing. Articles that are as m u c h fun as the lectures some people read t h e m i n . Serialised stories that it physically hurts to read.

A n d not just about Imperial College - about London, a n d life. We'll have an expanded, informative, useful, non-gridbased diary. More information on the huge number of clubs and societies at Imperial, special events, things happening at the union, a n d things happening i n London. The Felix website w i l l also be improved and kept u p to date.

There's plenty going on at Imperial, and so m u c h to do i n London - so w h y does a flick through Felix at the moment make me think I'm stuck on a particularly uninteresting island? I w i l l turn Felix into a magazine you'll actually w a n t to read. Articles you'll find interesting. N e w s you care about.

I w i l l make Felix more like The Times, Time Out and F H M a n d less like the Silverlmk Train Timetable (Autumn 1998) and Littlesby Parish Magazine.

election manifestoes

Candidate Manifestoes ' A l l '

deputy President

(Clubs &

Societies)

The diversity, success, a n d continuing g r o w t h of IC C l u b s and Societies is testament to h o w important they are i n IC life. I basically a i m to make involvement, a n d running of clubs a n d societies next year, as easy as possible for all participants. W h y me? I a m the C l u b captain, a n d former treasurer of the Ladies Football Club. This has given me a n i n s i g h t into most

Deputy President

(Education

& Welfare)

During my time at Imperial, I've held the positions of year rep, department rep and a m currently the academic affairs officer for R C S U (science subjects), so I have nearly 3 years experience of academic representation here. During this time I have seen how the representation system is plagued b y bureaucracy, apathy and little communication, this needs to change! A c c o m o d a t i o n : M a n y stu-

Standing for All

aspects of finance, and organisation of a club, as w e l l as giving me the opportunity to meet a n d work w i t h people from other clubs and societies at IC and other Universities. I have also participated i n several I C U events. M y wider responsibilities include b e i n g the A C C Women's Officer, a n d being part of the sub-editing team of L o n d o n Student.

bers i n order to rightly represent t h e m at union, college, and university level. B e i n g a n i n i t i a l contact point for i n d i v i d u a l enquiries and problems is another important aspect of the job.

The D P C S job s h o u l d be directed b y C & S members themselves. M y objectives w o u l d be to get viewpoints and feedback from I C U mem-

I think C l u b s a n d Societies are the best bit of IC. A s a participant, it is i n your interests to vote a n d have a say about

dents are trapped; dodgy landlords exploit students year in, year out. I w o u l d work to introduce a system where the impressed or disgruntled c a n write about the good and b a d landlords/properties. Through this others w i l l kno w h o w best to deal w i t h the usual suspects.

they can be made even better. Supporting other Academic Reps: M y a i m w i l l be to increase the visibility of, equip and support everyone w h o is there to help you w i t h any academic or welfare problem. With this, everyone should k n o w who can help them a n d their problems should be dealt w i t h swiftly.

Peer Support: I w i l l work to get a "buddies" scheme or similar, organised by students, runn i n g i n every department. Where schemes already exist I w i l l work w i t h those running them already and do my best to support them, and find out how

likewise if you think Sergeant Bosco "B.A." Baracus can set Posts everyone straight as Deputy "Ifyc u have a problem, if no one President (Finance and :an help and if you can find Services). ' If you think ., maybe you can hire the Lieutenant Templeton "Face" mi." Peck is charming enough to fill at's exactly what R O N (Rethe role of DP (Clubs a n d i Nominations) has done Societies), then vote N e w year for the N e w Election Election. A n d if y o u think jaign! So, if you would preCaptain "Howlin' M a d " Murdoch can best represent your educa2olonel John "Hannibal" Smit r as your President - and tional and welfare needs, N e w face it, what better leader Election is the candidate for there been through the you. We need a Felix editor, so >e of history? - then you what better candidate than the Id vote N e w Election. Do newspaper reporter Amy

I w o u l d also like to promote inter-campus links, b y encouraging events w i t h club a n d society counterparts at South Ken, Wye and Silwood.

their future!

M y door w i l l always be open and I w i l l make a real effort to let people k n o w I exist and a m there to chat about any problem they may have, a n d then deal w i t h it.

Allen? OK, so w e all know that she's not a proper A-Team member, but then the Felix editor isn't a proper Sabbatical... The

A-Team's

election

pledges include replacing the entire minibus fleet w i t h the cool black vans seen i n the series. Secondly, they have promised to put an e n d to motorised mascotry. Jez, Bo, Clem and Derrick w i l l be taken to bits and reassembled to form an awesome fighting machine that w i l l defend I C . b u t , just like on TV, you k no w that no one w i l l ever come to any harm.

interviews election

Candidate Interviews p

r e s

(

Why do you want to be Union President? It's a challenge! I think I have the experience as RCSU President; I've sat on the committees, I've gone through the processes, I think I kno w what I'm doing.

What's the best thing about the way the Union is being run?

What experience do you have? A s R C S U President, I've pulled the R C S U out of the quagmire it

The bureaucracy. It's as simple as that.

w a s in, and I kno w the Union staff, as w e l l as its structures.

What would you change? I w o u l d stop debate on the con-

The permanent staff have a very efficient w a y of doing things, and services are delivered w h e n they're supposed to.

stitution and the way we do things. I want people to focus on w h a t they're doing, and focus on their jobs. Do you think the President should be a figurehead or an administrator? Both. It's a necessary figurehead; it gives the Union something to revolve around.

And the worst thing

Presidem^

What's the best thing about the way the Union is being

Kpfisidenf

run? It is democratic, and that is important, and w e still listen to our students. A case i n point w o u l d be the faculties; there w e r e m a n y disagreements to start off w i t h , but now, after mass consultation, w e have reached a consensus, embodied through the constitution p a s s e d at the last council. What's

the

single

biggest

â&#x20AC;˘ * * Âť

Why do you want to be Union President? Because I think, w i t h my breadth of experience of a large range of different Union activities over four years, that I'm the best qualified candidate in College at the moment. What experience do you have? I've seen the administrative side of the Union by sitting on Council for a couple of years. I've had real hands on, nitty-

would you judge your success? If people were still talking about the constitution in twelve months time, I w o u l d have

thing you'd like to change?

Why do you want to be Union President? I think this year has b e e n a challenge, e s p e c i a l l y with respect to the problems faced by the advent of faculties, but we've also h a d the opportunity to start many n e w initiatives. I n o w have the skills and experience to be able to realise w h a t has begun.

At the end of your year, how

gritty experience administering t w o Summer Balls now, and I've also been involved on the clubs a n d societies side; involved mainly w i t h the Medics' drama society. What's the best thing about the way the Union is being run? It's not getting worse. What's the single biggest thing you'd like to change?

We have a huge number of volunteers w h o run our clubs and societies, and participate in a lot of our activities, and I w a n t to try a n d ensure that w e carry on recruiting good quality students, train them, and put in place a reward system that acknowledges what they've done for us. In a year's time, how would you judge your success? If I've accomplished the things I set out to do in my manifesto and if the students feel that

failed. If other people haven't done their jobs, again, the same thing. A l s o , if the services haven't been improved one iota, I w o u l d have failed also. What makes you the strongest candidate? M y outlook. Because I want to cut bureaucracy, because I want to make things better, I want the services to improve. I've done it w i t h the RCSU, and I can do it again. I don't think the other candidates have that drive or that motivation.

they've been served better by the Union, t h e n I'll be happy. In particular, I w o u l d like to help students find accommodation after they leave halls, and I w o u l d also like major improvements to be made in the induction of Freshers. What makes you the strongest candidate? I think I have the skills and experience necessary, I understand h o w to do the job, and I i n t e n d to a p p l y w h a t I've learnt.

I'd like to include n e w people, by getting them to run the services. I'm not about re-designing the Union from the ground up.

Definitely. It is the figurehead to the outside world. That's how I ran the Summer Ball and that's how I'll run the Union.

At the end of your year, how would you judge your success? Turnout in that year's election is a very good indicator of how involved people feel and how connected people feel w i t h w h a t the Union's actually doing.

What makes you the strongest

Would you want the President to be a figurehead?

candidate? With the obvious exception of the president incumbent, I have the best idea of how the Union runs on a day-to-day basis, but also over a large amount of time. With respect to the current President, I am still student; I go out and hear what people moan and groan about.

election interviews

Candidate Interviews Deputy President

{Finance

W h y do y o u w a n t to do this job? I've worked in the Union for t w o years now, and I've seen the Union from so many different angles. I've worked w i t h all the sabbaticals, and I'll enjoy the job and the challenges.

Services)

Also, I've organised t w o b i g events. I've organised "East meets West" last year. I w a s i n charge of organising International Night this year, so I w a s in charge of two big budgets there and I think that w i l l give me an advantage going into the job.

What experience do y o u have? Last year I w a s S C C chair, this year I'm OSC chair. I've worked with the clubs and societies, I've worked w i t h their finances.

Depuf^Pfesident

the current sabbaticals agree, spending a year at the end of your degree is a great way to spend a year. You get to see a whole different side to College life than you might do otherwise.

What experience do y o u have that qualifies you? I think I spend too much time i n the Union drinking and working

What experience do y o u have? I have very little Union experience, but I've got plenty of experience in the financial field through w o r k i n g for various agencies out of term-time. What's the best t h i n g about U n i o n Services? They all seem extremely reli-

Services)

H o w w o u l d y o u judge y o u r o w n success at the year's end? I want to improve on the services that w e offer. This can only be done by getting people to come i n and give their say on how the services are provided and what they want to see at the bars and catering.

do y o u t h i n k of this? One thing I w o u l d like to do is to look at policies so every club and society are on the same playing field and get an even chance. What makes y o u the strongest candidate? Simply because of my experience w i t h the Union. I've been working closely w i t h the Union through the S C C and OSC, I've got to k n o w the staff and the sabbaticals this year. I've got a

Some clubs get £50 per head, w h i l e some get only £1. W h a t

good understanding of what my job w o u l d be.

Some clubs get £50 per head, w h i l e some get only £1. Is that fair?

ing they get. W h a t standards w o u l d y o u set yourself?

in the bar so I've had some feedback on h o w the bars have been doing for the past couple of years. I've also been working w i t h the radio station as their treasurer and M e d i a Group junior treasurer.

Some of those clubs w h o get more funding c a n provide broader services like IC Radio and STOIC. They go beyond their members.

What's the worst t h i n g about the U n i o n ?

Those clubs are quite specialist and their members are really enthusiastic about what they do. I'm a member of Gliding Club and clubs like that should definitely be allowed the fund-

I'm i n it to provide what I think the students want and need from my post. If you agree, you should vote for me.

very few people know about them.

H o w w o u l d y o u judge success?

Sometimes people get too involved w i t h U n i o n politics and get very pedantic - The Union - it's for students.

fFmknce

W h y do y o u w a n t to do this job? I think I can, is the main reason.

biggest

I w o u l d like to introduce debit cards use at the Union - not

(finance

W h y do y o u w a n t to do this job?

Deputy Present

What's the single change?

many people carry cash any more. I'd probably start just w i t h catering and, if I can, move it to bars.

Services)

able, but I've only used them on the South K e n campus. Although I've been to Wye and Silwood I haven't investigated the facilities out there, or at Mary's or Charing Cross. What's the worst thing? The communication. We need to introduce a reliable and welladvertised method for the students to tell us what they want. Alright, there are forms available, but they break down and

But w h a t about, say, gliding or underwater clubs?

Do y o u t hi nk the inequality between funding for clubs is fair? It depends on what you mean by fair. A sports society will need transport to get to their games and I believe that the international group have a fairly large contingency w h i c h they can turn to. Whereas the sports societies need entry fees, kits and so on. I would be interested in sponsorship for the kit particularly.

I think putting money in to promote and encourage students to use the U n i o n w o u l d be great. Improvements in bar takings and an increase i n finance levels are important. W h a t makes y o u the strongest candidate?

If people like me, and people say that I've been a good DP(F&S) then I've done a good job. I suppose I could also say the profits, but that doesn't include services and the Union isn't a profit-making organisation. Profit should be regarded as a bonus. W h a t makes y o u the strongest candidate? I w o u l d say I a m the strongest candidate because of the research I've done.

interviews election

/19

Candidate Interviews Felix Editor W h y do y o u w a n t to be Felix Editor again?

What's t h e single biggest change y o u w a n t to make?

I enjoy it. I think, due to the experience I've got, that I'll be better than the other candidates and that I'll improve Felix.

I'd like to make Felix look more interesting, and be more interesting by giving writers more power to do what they want.

What's the best t h i n g about Felix at the moment? I like the diary, a n d I like the crossword. [Why?] Because the readers like the diary a n d the

W h a t magazines/newspapers w o u l d y o u like Felix to emulate?

crossword and that's my job.

Felix Editor

In a perfect world, and if money were no object, I d like it to look like Empire and have the content of a broadsheet. I want it to

Âť

W h y do y o u w a n t to do this job? First, I think I w o u l d enjoy doing the job. I already enjoy working for Felix - I do lots of work for them at the moment as Music Editor. The most important reason is because I'm certain I could do a very good job. W h a t experiences have y o u h a d that y o u t h i n k w o u l d make y o u good at this job? Obviously the experience that

I've had in Felix doing music - I think that's quite similar to the job of Editor. I also do quite a lot w i t h IC Radio. I think all of this shows that I work well as part of the team. I'm a team player and I can get along w i t h people very w e l l and motivate them w e l l too. What's the best t h i n g about Felix at the moment? I think I'd probably say the College news. It tells us what's

have a feel slightly more like TimeOut. I enjoy, the diary and the review sections. I think other people do too - they read the second half much more than the first. I have a duty to the people who read it, and as such I want to do whatever people like. Some people said they liked the colour front covers last year - from a financial point of view, that's impossible, but maybe w e need to make it feel more like a magazine. If I d i d get it again, I'd spend a lot of next term doing surveys to find out what people want.

*F*nx

Editor

W h y do y o u w a n t to be Felix Editor? Because I think I can do it.

So, w h a t magazines/newspa-

W h a t experience do y o u have? I edited my hall magazine last year and I generally do a bit of writing on websites. So what's t h e biggest single change you'd like to make? I w o u l d introduce more articles that are of interest, really.

magazines/newspapers

w o u l d y o u like to see Felix emulate? A b o u t ? W h a t k i n d of thing? N e w s ? College? T h i n g s generally about life. Last year and previous years there have been articles on things that were important financial matters, sexual health. Those don't get covered in Felix at the moment as far as I'm aware. There aren't enough articles that are entertaining. There's a lot of waffly semiopinionated articles, but nothing offering a concrete opinion.

If people came up to me at the end of next year and said it was better than the year before, then I'd think I had done a good job. W h a t makes y o u the strongest candidate? I don't think anyone can appreciate how much effort goes into Felix unless they've tried to do it themselves. I also think that Felix should be fun for both the readers and the people who put it out each week - I'm a club president as w e l l as an Editor.

going on i n College and the pers do y o u w a n t to emulate? Union, w h i c h is probably the Cambridge Student, w h i c h I've mam purpose of Felix. read a lot of - it's fantastic. If w e can aim for some of the stanSo what's the single biggest dards that they set, then that'd change y o u w o u l d make? be good. It's important w e include more national and international news What makes y o u the strongest and sport. I also think w e need candidate? to make more use of the Felix I have t w o years' experience at website - w e could use it to put Felix. I k n o w quite a lot of the news up as it happens w i t h things I'd need to k n o w as more detail. Finally I think w e Editor. I'll r u n it more profesneed to make it more professionally - I'll try to run it propersional. ly. I'm very w e l l organised and

What 1

H o w w o u l d y o u judge your success?

I want to see it more like Time Out, The Times and F H M . H o w w o u l d y o u judge y o u r o w n success?

basically I'm certain I can make Felix a better publication.

include more rather than less of them but of course students w i l l very lazily write a lot of rubbish so I'll have to exercise some kind of quality control and just not publish articles that are just waffle.

Whether people say to me that

W h y are y o u t h e strongest

they've enjoyed reading Felix.

candidate?

H o w w o u l d students get to w r i te for Felix? Well, I'd give everyone a chance at least for Felix. I want to welcome people submitting articles a n d I w o u l d hope to

Intriguing question. I don't k n o w w h a t I w o u l d say, it depends on w h a t the other guys have got really, and I don't k n o w whether they have... it. Just the w i l l to succeed.

election interviews

2QJ

Candidate Interviews >#ÂťaÂŤjty Pre^wMn^MMlT &

understanding of the paperwork and processes involved. I have also become increasingly involved in the Union itself and feel that the experience I've gained can be of use to others.

W h y do y o u w a n t to do this job? I have been involved w i t h Clubs and Societies since my first year and I think it w o u l d be a great opportunity to get stuck in, be responsible and make a difference.

What's the best t h i n g about Clubs and societies at Imperial?

What experience do y o u have? I'm approachable and a natural problem solver. In particular, I have been Treasurer of the Ladies' Football so have an

.11

^mm&

What about the differences i n

it because they have to, but

There are many considerations

j v : : ; ; . ] ; . ^ i IS :

;

W h y do y o u w a n t t h i s job? I've done a lot of positions in the education structure a n d I've often felt that they're under supported. What experience do y o u have? I started off as a year rep i n the first year, then I w a s a department rep i n the second year and I a m currently the A c a d e m i c Affairs Officer for RCSU

& Welfare)

What's the best t h i n g about the U n i o n ' s E d u c a t i o n a n d Welfare policy? I think the best thing is quite a lot of the volunteers w h o actually do the posts, some of the years... the enthusiasm of the people involved, and I really want to use that. A n d the worst thing? It's quite bureaucratic, too official.

Posts

RON means Re-Open Nominations. If R O N w i n s i n any post, t h e n n e w candidates w i l l be requested a n d another election w i l l take place. W h y should w e vote R O N ? R O N is there for those w h o feel the real candidates wouldn't do a good job. You can ask for n e w people to stand for our post.

What's the single biggest t h i n g that y o u w o u l d change? I really want to increase the links between the campuses. I think there are a lot of people who do similar things at Wye and Silwood, for example, who could learn a lot from the clubs at South Ken, and vice versa.

For me, I think the best thing is the fact that they exist because of volunteers. They're not doing

i Deputy Presidemr(BaMcMion

Standing for All

Societies)

because they want to, and a lot of enthusiasm and enjoyment comes w i t h that.

W h a t experience t e a m have?

do the A-

Hannibal is a Colonel and what better leader can you think of? He'd make a fine President. I'm sure B A would be a pretty scary DP(F&S) and wouldn't let anyone spend any money that they weren't supposed to. I'm sure Face is charming enough to help everyone w i t h their clubs and societies and

funding between clubs?

that need to be taken into account w h e n comparing clubs, the primary one of w h i c h is what is actually being funded. For instance, the Yacht Club may require a n e w boat that may cost several thousand pounds, but without that funding, the club couldn't exist. What makes y o u the strongest candidate? I a m interested enough and dedicated enough to do the job, and I think I'll do a good job at that!

If someone came into y o u r office a n d makes a homophobic/racist/sexist comment, h o w w o u l d y o u react?

jointly how to go about it. I think a lot of people vote for a particular president on that, based on their manifesto.

I w o u l d probably let it pass, and assess the situation, and find out what their problem is.

H o w w i l l y o u judge y o u r success?

Do y o u t h i n k that p o l i t i c a l c a m p a i g n i n g is part of y o u r job?

I want people to talk more, and k n o w w h o to turn to if they need to.

I w o u l d see that as something that falls between my job and that of the President. I think that if either of us think that it's an issue, we would discuss it together, and then both decide

W h a t makes y o u the best candidate? I'm the only one. I've got experi-

Murdoc h can help everyone w i t h their educational and welfare needs. The candidate for the Felix Editor is A m y A l l e n who is actually a journalist in the series, so I'm sure she d fit in fine into that role.

son or the other because someone told them to, or because nobody else is standing. The reason for R O N is to make sure people are voted i n for the right reasons. Where there's doubt about a candidate's ability to do the job it gives a chance for a second try.

Does R O N ever w a n t the elections to end? R O N wants the elections to continue until there's someone suitable in each post, rather than the students just thinking that they've got to vote for this per-

ence of the academic structure, I've been there and I've done that.

W h y s h o u l d I vote for you? Because you might not think that the candidates are any good.

M a n y t h a n k s to D a v i d R o b e r t s for i n t e r v i e w i n g the candidates a n d to D a v i d F r a n c i s for his t r a n s c r i p t i o n s k i l l z

Union Services Survey

imperial college

Please give us a few moments of your time to help improve the Union's services, and you could... WIN

one of these p r i z e s

Third Prize

One of five tickets to a Union Bust-a-Gut C o m e d y Night of your choice, (£3 value)

S e c o n d Prize

Two pairs of tickets to the end of term party, 22nd March (£10 value)

First Prize

A ticket to the Summer Ball, 8th June (£25 value)

Your Union is working to improve its service for you. Your comments and opinions are very important to us, and we hope you can spare a couple of minutes to let us know what you think. This survey is anonymous - if you choose to enter the competition, rest assured that we will separate the competition entry forms from the survey before either are examined. Please select the one most appropriate answer for each question. Please tell us about yourself.

Male/Female

Campus news

This week

This term

Last term

Never

World news

This week

This term

Last term

Never

Reviews

This week

This term

Last term

Never

Crossword

This week

This term

Last term

Never

What's on

This week

This term

Last term

Never

Sports

This week

This term

Last term

Never

Features

This week

This term

Last term

Never

Letters

This week

This term

Last term

Never

Age: Under 25 / 25-35 / over 35

Are you a member of Imperial College?

Visitor

Student

Staff

3rd year or above

Other

1st year

2nd year

Post grad

Department

2. O

Are you a member of a Union sports club? Yes

O No

Please list

7. 3. Are you a member of any other Union club or society? O

Yes

Please list

9. 3.

If you read a newspaper, where do you get it?

On the way to college

Sherfield Walkway

I borrow someone else's

Elsewhere on campus

Where do you buy...?

High Street Kensington

O Union shop

Other

Computer supplies (disks, blank CD-Rs, etc.) O

High Street Kensington

O Union shop

Other

Greeting cards O

High Street Kensington

O Union shop

Have you visited the Union website (www.su.ic.ac.uk)? O

Yes, but not in the last few weeks.

Yes, quite recently

Have you ever listened to IC Radio? o

Yes, but not in the last few weeks.

Yes, quite recently

Have you ever watched STOIC (Imperial Student TV)? o

Yes, but not in the last few weeks.

Yes, quite recently

Have you worked for the Union? (Please circle)

Yes, as a student: Full / Part-time

Yes, as a staff: Full / Part-time

Area/s

10. Have you visited the Union Advice Service in the Beit Quad East Wing basement?

Stationery for college/work (pens, notebooks, etc.) O

When did you last read Felix, and which sections?

Other

No, ! didn't know it was there

No, I know about it but have never needed it

Yes, but not this term

I found it helpful

They couldn't help

Yes, quite recently

I found it helpful

They couldn't help

Comment

Thank you very much for your time. Your opinions matter to the Union. W e will use this information to improve services in the future. The results will be published in Felix at a later date. What now? For a chance to enter the competition, please fill in the section below and drop into one of our collection boxes before 12 noon Friday, March 1st. P l e a s e note that this section will be detached from the survey before it is evaluated, ensuring the anonymity of your response. Thank you. Name Department

E-mail

D r o p B o x e s a r e l o c a t e d at: T h e U n i o n R e c e p t i o n (1st floor of U n i o n building)

11. Did you visit any part of the Union Building in Beit Quad in...? Fresher's Week

T h e Library

16. Please circle all of the following you have visited in the evening this term, and rate their different qualities.

Fresher's Fair

Union/Activities Card

Union Bar

Fresher's Party

Other

Atmosphere Prices

Last term

Daytime

Evening/Weekend

Careers Fair

Other

Convenience Staff Food/Snacks

Daytime

Evening/Weekend

Daytime

Evening/Weekend

T h e U n i o n S h o p o n the S h e r f i e l d W a l k w a y

©© ©© ©© ©© ©©

©© @© ©© @© ®©

d B ' s B a r (to the left of the U n i o n lobby) Yesterday or today

Atmosphere Prices

Every day O

O Daytime

Evening/Weekend

Convenience Staff

Never

Music

12. Have you bought tickets for club and society events at the Union office? O

Yes

I didn't know I could

I've never wanted any

Prices

Staff

13. Where would you go to see a movie?

Music

Alternative cinema

Food/Snacks

I would rent a video or DVD

Union Cinem a

Commercial cinema

Other

Prices Convenience

( P l e a s e tick all u s e d regularly, a n d c i r c l e the o n e u s e d m o s t ) O

J C R (Junior C o m m o n Room)

M D H (Main Dining Hall)

Da Vinci's Cafe

dB's Cafe

Departmental canteen/cafe

Outside College

I bring a packed lunch

I don't eat lunch

S C R (senior C o m m o n Room)

Other

Southside Bar Atmosphere

14. Where do you go for lunch?

D a V i n c i ' s B a r (to the right of the U n i o n l o b b y ) Atmosphere

Convenience

Staff Music Food/Snacks

A c l u b in L o n d o n . c a l l e d ... Atmosphere Prices Convenience Music Food/Snacks

15. How much money, on average, do you spend on a night out, including transport? On. a weekend E

On a weeknight E

A p u b in L o n d o n , c a l l e d ... Atmosphere

Prices

Convenience

©©

Music

Food/Snacks

©©

reviews music

Clinic Walking With Thee

Two Day Rule When You're Ready

Various FabricLive 02

Out this Monday on Domino

Out this Monday on Sugarshack

Out now on Fabric

records

The career of this L i v e r p u d l i a n fourpiece, formed i n 1997, h a s developed strangely. H a v i n g released arguably their best material on a series of early EPs, acquired a good live reputation and fallen out w i t h their fan base for re-releasing The Second Line to coincide w i t h a Levi's advertisement, Clinic have not always been successful or w i d e l y accepted. This album forces me to ask questions a n d leaves me confused. O p e n i n g w i t h the s u b d u e d and sombre Harmony, the Clinic boys offer up a dark electro-seance. Welcome is a dronebased psychobilly number, where Clinic live u p to all those Velvet Underground references. Nonetheless, t h e track b e c o m e s p r o p h e t i c a l l y ironic as A d e Blackburn remarks "How could you disintegrate form?" just as it becomes apparent that the a l b u m itself lacks structure and direction. Title track a n d f o r t h c o m i n g single Walking With Thee (aka Nuns) is evidently t h e most effective song, w i t h i t s fairground s w i r l and monkey organ grind providing a fitting backdrop for a defiant vocal. However, this becomes the pivotal point of the album - afterwards, deja v u sets in and it all goes d o w n h i l l . Walking With Thee leaves me w i t h a strange taste i n m y mouth. Is there anyt h i n g particularly good here? The b a n d have tried to progress - the a l b u m has a distinctly d e v e l o p e d cabaret feel, for example - but instead of m o v i n g forward, they have only stepped sideways. Clinic burned w i t h vitality a n d urgency once, m a k i n g this a l b u m even more disappointing and hard to bear.

records

Two Day Rule are a feisty Bristolian boygirl punk combo. C o m p r i s i n g of N e i l M u r r a y (lead vocals/guitar), A n d r e a Kenny, (who vies w i t h Murray for top billing), C r a i g Smith (bass) a n d M a t t Woolman (drums), they've built u p a s m a l l racket of e n t h u s i a s m for their a c c o m p l i s h e d p u n k s e n s i b i l i t i es a n d crazy live sets. Their debut album begins

w i t h the mildly likeable Odds and Ends a n d No Doubt, w h i c h have me merely nodding w i t h appreciation a n d do not bode extremely w e l l for the rest of the songs. Eager anticipation leads me to the recent single Had A Good Thing, w h i c h is almost indescribable despite being an impressive track. It's acerbic lyrics, such as "I want to get into your pants", stand out from the w a l l of sound. Space is more reflective, w i t h a thrashier feel. The cymbal and maracas provide an interesting b a c k g r o u n d for the centrepiece Andrea's vocals.

Dance compilations are always difficult things to judge, since they are often as much about record label politics as about the music. With this is mind, FabricLive 02, m i x e d b y A l i B (pic above), promises to be a true reflection of a FabricLive set, rather than a load of " a n t h e m s " lumped together in one convenient package. So, h o w does it compare? Purists w i l l argue that FabricLive 02 lacks the rough edges of a live set - that it is too polished. They may even argue that it misses out on the whole atmosphere of Fabric itself. That aside, the a l b u m delivers a great selection of professionally mixed tracks, put together into a structured set that takes you from a quirky and comparitively s u b d u e d start to a bass-heavy climax. It does exactly w h a t you'd w a n t it to do. Essentially, the key to success for this CD w i l l lie i n its track list. l i s ' The Next Level, currently providing the soundtrack to a major advertising campaign, is sure to generate interest in FabricLive 02.

The bluesy jazz-funk fusion on Johnny And Loretta is the first real sign of originality. This track is the clear winner on an a l b u m p a c k e d w i t h peaks a n d troughs. Better Off Now is a sixties-style number w i t h more of the jazz and less of the funk. The juxtaposition of this w i t h the trashier I'll Be Just Fine, reminiscent of Bis in their heyday, works well.

To most people, the fact that the album w a s mixed by FabricLive resident A l l B won't mean a thing. But only someone who truly understands the FabricLive experience can convey that sublime mix of bass a n d beats to an audience w h o may not yet have experienced it.

Highlight number t w o is Sympathetic, full of guitar noodling and the vocal spir-

ple and vast quantities of smoke, this is about as close as y o u c a n get to

it of Blink 182's Tom De Longe - pop-punk at it's very best. The excellent eighties pastiche Too Good To Be True rounds off a real album of t w o halves - the second by far outshining the first.

FabricLive without actually being there.

A p a r t from t u r n i n g off your lights and filling your bedroom w i t h a hundred peo-

Patrick For a chance to w i n a copy of FabricLive

Chris

records

Sajini

02, turn to page 25.

music reviews INTERVIEW with Vex Red Felix probed the minds of angsty indie-metallers Vex R e d on their dimly-lit, slightly dingy tour bus, somewhere i n W l . [See right for a review of their latest single Can't Smile.] F E L I X : So w h a t bands do y o u t h i n k are g o o d at t h e m o m e n t then? NICK: Well, w e s a w a b a n d supporting The Cooper Temple Clause the other day in Portsmouth - Biffy Clyro, or something? You know, I haven't been to a g i g where I've been b l o w n away by a b a n d i n ages, a n d then suddenly there's this b a n d , a n d they come on, a n d they start w i t h the quietest k i n d of music and then launch into the heaviest kind of music a n d I w a s b l o w n away. They were w i c k e d .

LIVE: Delta + Kidd Dynamo + Serafin @ The Monarch

KEITH: Yeah, I think I read on a website we're playing w i t h them... You r e a d about yourselves o n a w e b s i t e ? W h i c h one of y o u posts as V e x R e d o n t h e official noticeboard? KEITH: Normally me.

This evening w a s a showcase for some of the n e w talent trying

Aren't there about three girls w h o post r e p e a t e d l y o n there?

to find their w a y into the music business. First u p were Serafin (pic above), a four-piece from London who certainly rocked the venue. They w e n t absolutely m a d on stage, despite seeming nervous at first, and played all-out, gett i n g the crowd's feet t a p p i n g almost immediately.

KEITH: Yeah, I'll put a message up, and half an hour later there'll be thirty messages and they're all from the same girls. Spencer, the guy w h o does the website, made himself this hoodie that said "Vex Red Webmaster" on it.

Serafin flit b e t w e e n dark, melancholy rock (Day By Day) a n d quiet, melodic m u s i n g s (Ordinarily Me) without a flinch. Their very special b r a n d of indie-rock is b o u n d to take them a long w a y - here's hoping they get s n a p p e d u p quickly and make the big time.

NICK: Yeah, he wore it at a gig, and he w a s like, "I'm famous for fifteen minutes!" W h i c h festivals are y o u p l a y i n g t h i s year? NICK: Apparently w e ' v e got Glastonbury. Apparently. A n d probably Reading and Leeds as w e l l . H a v e y o u got a favourite? N I C K and K E I T H (together): Glasto, definitely. W h a t ' s t h e best set y o u ' v e seen there?

Next on stage were K i d d D y n a m o , from Belfast, looking quite intimidated b y the size of the crowd. "This is our first g i g in L o n d o n " admitted lead m a n Colin, before the b a n d launched into some of the best emo I've heard i n a long time. K i d d Dynamo's a i m should be to retain the naive charm that so many n e w bands lose after w o r k i n g hard to make it b i g . Their lyrics, together w i t h Colin's sweeter-than-sugar voice and the ringing, beautifully harmonised guitars make K i d d Dynamo something very special to look out for in the near future.

D e l ta were the headline act, and b y this time w e were expecting great things, considering h o w good their support had been. Unfortunately, w e were disappointed. Their better tracks were m e d i u m to good, but their worse tracks were just not w o r t h listening to. They were everything that w a s b a d about mid-nineties britpop, mixed w i t h some of the subtle, smooth melodies of today's indie revolution. The disappointment of the c r o w d w a s reflected by the number of people w h o vacated the room i n favour of m i n g l i n g w i t h the t w o support acts downstairs in the bar.

Jess

NICK: U m, I don't think w e see many bands w h e n w e go - w e get caned i n our tents and can't move. C a n y o u t e l l us about t h e a l b u m ? KEITH: It's fairly eclectic. If you've only heard the singles, it'll be a bit of a surprise. NICK: It's definitely a mix - there are a lot of quiet songs on there as w e l l . Someone described us as the "Spiritualized of numetal", w h i c h w a s quite cool. KEITH: Yeah, and I read that Terry looks like Daniel Johns out of Silverchair - he's got the same hair a n d piercings a n d everything. But if you say that to Terry, he'll say he h a d them first. M a y b e D a n i e l J o h n s bases h i m s e l f o n Terry. So, t e l l u s about the pot p l a n t episode. NICK: O h yeah, everyone k n o w s about that! A n t nearly got arrested! The tour bus broke d o w n and w e had to go to a bus depot to get it fixed. A n t stole this pot plant and he n a m e d it Frank. It w a s about three feet high, and w e just h a d it on the bus. We got to customs and they wouldn't let us through. They wouldn't tell us why, and then suddenly about six police cars drove up a n d surrounded the bus, a n d they were like, " w e believe y o u have something that doesn't belong to y o u on the b u s " . A n t w a s really good about it and gave it back, but I still can't believe they called the police about a pot plant.

Sajini

reviews music O U T THIS W E E K The following are due for release on M o n d a y 25 February: ALBUMS CLINIC - Walking With Thee J E W E L - This Way M O N T E L L J O R D A N - M o n t e l l Jordan T W O DAY R U L E - W h e n You're Ready SINGLES B R A N C A C C I O & A I S H E R - It's Gonna Be (A Lovely Day) C A P I T O L K - Pillow T E T R A S P L E N D O U R - Pollen Fever ...and also the Hefner, Simian, White Stripes, Gorillaz and M i s s Black A m e r i c a singles (all reviewed below)

Singles Roundup V E X R E D - Can't S m i l e W i t h more angst and p a s s i o n t h a n a fourteen-year-old's diary, Can't Smile is the m i n d - b l o w i n g l y wonderful n e w single from Vex Red (pic above). The combination of a throbbing bass line, a snappy but memorably dark guitar riff and Terry's melancholy lilt makes this single w e l l w o r t h having.

BflBBB

Jess

H E F N E R - The H e f n e r B r a i n Another quirky mixture of d r u m machines, modules and indie crooning is coming your way, and if you like Hefner already, then you k n o w exactly w h a t to expect. Worryingly though, most of the tracks sound uncanni l y like theme tunes from kids' T V programmes. I think the makers of Fireman Sam should sue.

W H I T E S T R I P E S - Fell In L o v e W i t h A G i r l What energy! This is definitive rock music. In less than two minutes, M e g and Jack White deliver a powerful song without superficial production, and the result is really exciting. The t w o other tracks on the C D are just as dynamic and energetic as the first. This is b o u n d to be successful.

aaaa

Frangois

G O R I L L A Z - T o m o r r o w Comes Today So the album's customary slow track finally gets released as a single. Tomorrow Comes Today is a chilled out song w i t h a cool harmonica bit, but it feels a little too m u c h like Blur. Not that there's anything w r o n g w i t h Blur - I just expected more. There's nothing special here, although there's nothing dire either. It might grow on me, but Damon's moaning voice w i l l probably just piss me off.

BBQOO

Oscar

MISS B L A C K A M E R I C A - Infinite C h i n e s e B o x

BBOQD

Derek

Systematic guitars, dynamic power chords and block rocking beats begin your ten minute affair w i t h the indescribably allur-

SIMIAN - M r Crow Simian, w h o released their excellent first L P Chemistry Is What We Are last year, b r i n g us more of their psychedelic pop experiments. The t w o incarnations of M r Crow - radio edit and a l b u m version - are both very catchy. Then, on the five other tracks, all previously unreleased, Simian's exciting brainwaves are particularly interesting as their sweet melodies contrast w i t h a background of electronica. O n the whole, they produce a unique, innovative sound.

ing, truly seductive Infinite Chinese Box. "Short but s w e e t " is a good description for one of the best singles of the year so far. The B-sides are equally promising. The tale of the dysfunctional, self-destructing relationship has rarely been so eloquently expressed via m u s i c a t h a n on Scarface, and the bluesy, expressive Pub Rock Coma features punk sounds reminiscent of J i m m y Eat World and vocals in the style of H u n d r e d Reasons.

aaaao Frangois COMPETITION This week, we're g i v i n g a w a y a copy of the highly recommended compilation a l b u m FabricLive 02, mixed by A l i B (see review, page 23). Q U E S T I O N : N a m e the t w o resident D J s at F a b r i c L i v e . E m a i l your answer, along w i t h your name, year and department, to m u s i c . f e l i x @ i c . a c . u k by Thursday 28 February.

BBBBO

Sajini

T E L E P O P M U S I K - Breathe Squeaky electronic beats b a c k e d w i t h inoffensive sonar swirls. That's probably the most tactful w a y to describe this attractively pa c ka g e d single. E v e n the randomly scattered lyrics are unsalvageable, unimaginative drivel. You can't dance to this - the best that one can muster is a slight n o d of the head in time. But it isn't chilling music either, as the dithery beat becomes more and more irritating as you listen.

BOOOD

Sajini

film review

Editorial "Lord Of The Macarena"

Oscar Nominations for the 74th Academy Awards 2001

The first editorial of term and my excuse is that I s a w The Fellowship Of The Chicken Wing last week. The acting is definitely not up to scratch, but really, w h o cares. The scenery, the monsters, the special-effects. One of the greatest action movies ever made and if you have not seen it, then see it, because it is w o r t h a butcher's on the b i g screen.

It takes twelve people t w e n t y hours to make each of them and on 24th M a r c h they w i l l be h a n d e d out to this year's most highly-regarded achievers i n Hollywood. The Oscars initially derived their name w h e n A c a d e m y librarian, Margaret Herrick, claimed that the statuettes looked like her uncle, Oscar. H o w she came to this conclusion is still a mystery, since the statuette has no facial features, except for a nose. Margaret Herrick. What a muppet.

The t w o sequels, The Return Of Burger King and The Two Zingers, w i l l fail in having the same impact as the Fellowship. The Fellowship has set the landmark and I think there w i l l inevitably be a b a c k l a s h from the critics. In any case, I cannot w a i t to see the next one. One aspect of the L o r d Of The Chicken Wings I find fascinating is the w a y political forces have tried to extract their ideology from it. I read earlier this w e e k that the book is held in enormous esteem b y Italian fascists, for instance. Apparently, no self-respecting fascist's library is complete without a copy of Mein Kampf alongside The Lord Of The Chicken Wings. Then I read that leftist hippies in the 1960s s a w it as an essential part of their reading. But that many people see it as a metaphor for the allied victory in World War II. So w h a t do w e read into it? Is it just 'entertainment'? The values represented in movies have shaped our o w n personal morality for decades. They affect the w a y w e see the w orl d. Should w e care? Perhaps. More importantly, I w a s d o w n the U n i o n for Cheesy Wotsits last week w h e n the crap D J decides to play Macarena. Then, to my horror, several people actually started 'doing the Macarena'. N o w at some point they h a d to learn h o w to do the dance - and that's w h a t I'm w o r r i e d about. D i d they have Macarena lessons? H o w d i d they learn it so w e l l , that b y the time they were geschloshed, in the Union, at l a m i n the morning, they could 'go through the motions', so precisely? So m u c h effort, just to look like a t w i t ? One final rant. The J C R shop. I happene d to be in there the other day w h e n the manager turns up, dappered up like a King. A r m a n i suit, gold cuff-links, flashy w a t c h , the works. Why? Because IC students are still w i l l i n g to s p e n d money i n that ripoff merchant. Fair enough, sit d o w n in the J C R if you want, but don't encourage t h e m by spendi ng money in the shop.

This year everyone is looking to the Fellowship Of The Ring to storm the s h o w w i t h its 13 nominations. Its rivals include A Beautiful Mind (8 nominations), Gosford Park (6 nominations), and Amelie (5 nominations). If I w a s a betting m a n (which I am) I w o u l d put my house (or my parents' house) on the Fellowship to take this year's Oscars to the proverbial cleaners. So w h a t else should w e look out for? Best supporting actor/actress? No. T h e y ' v e already lost out to the best actor/actress by default. Never got the point of that award. What w e should look out for is Willard Smith's nomination for Ali. It w a s a great performance and I think he is clear favourite. A l s o look out'for the British interest. There are about a half dozen nominations for Brits, although they are not famous enough for us to k n o w precisely w h i c h ones they are. The Oscar ceremony represents the A m e r i c a n movie industry giving itself a huge self-congratulatory pat on the back. This year w i t h movies like Ali, Memento, and the Fellowship Of The Rings, I think it has just about deserved it. Some interesting Oscar facts: • Walt Disney holds the record for the most individual tions and awards: 64 nominations and 26 awards

nomina-

• Only two women have ever been nominated for directing: Jane Campion in 1993 for The Piano, and Lina Wertmuller in 1976 for Seven Beauties • The Academy

is made up of about 5,700 voting members. They all vote to determine the final winners • The 1928 Oscars took fifteen minutes to hand out the awards. The 2000 Oscars took 249 minutes. Legendary presenter Bob Hope once said that the Oscars were 2hrs worth of entertainment crammed into four hours. Darius

interview film Best foreign language f i l m of the year * A M E L I E France E L L I N G A Norway L A G A A N India N O M A N ' S L A N D Bosnia & Herzegovina S O N OF T H E BRIDE A r g e n t i n a Best O r i g i n a l Screenplay A M E L I E Guillaume Laurant and Jean-Pierre Jeunet * G O S F O R D P A R K Julian Fellowes M E M E N T O Christopher Nolan M O N S T E R ' S B A L L Milo A d d i c a & W i l l Rokos T H E R O Y A L T E N E N B A U M S Wes A n d e r s o n & O w e n Wilson

P e r f o r m a n c e b y a n actor i n a l e a d i n g role

Achievement i n cinematography A M E L I E Bruno Delbonnel B L A C K H A W K D O W N Slawomir Idziak

Russell Crowe in "A Beautiful M i n d "

* T H E F E L L O W S H I P OF T H E RING A n d r e w Lesnie

Sean Penn in "I A m Sam"

T H E M A N W H O W A S N ' T T H E R E Roger Deakins M O U L I N R O U G E Donald M . M c A l p i n e

*Willard Smith in " A l i " Denzel Washington in "Training Day" Tom W i l k i n s on i n "In the Bedroom" P e r f o r m a n c e b y a n actor i n a s u p p o r t i n g role J i m Broadbent in "Iris" Ethan H a w k e in "Training Day" Ben Kingsley in "Sexy Beast" Ian M c K e l l e n in "The Fellowship of the Ring" * J o n Voight in " A l i " P e r f o r m a n c e b y a n actress i n a l e a d i n g role Halle Berry in "Monster's Ball" * J u d i Dench in "Iris" Nicole K i d m a n in " M oul in Rouge" Sissy Spacek in "In the Bedroom" Renee Zellweger i n "Bridget Jones's Diary" P e r f o r m a n c e b y a n actress i n a s u p p o r t i n g role "Jennifer Connelly in "A Beautiful M i n d " H e l e n M i r r e n in "Gosford Park" M a g g i e Smith in "Gosford Park" M a r i s a Tomei in "In the Bedroom" Kate Wmslet in "Iris" Achievement in directing A B E A U T I F U L M I N D Ron H o w a r d B L A C K H A W K D O W N Ridley Scott G O S F O R D P A R K Robert A l t m a n * T H E F E L L O W S H I P OF T H E R I N G Peter J a c k s o n (pictured) M U L H O L L A N D DRIVE David Lynch Best m o t i o n p i c t u r e of t h e year A BEAUTIFUL MIND GOSFORD PARK IN T H E B E D R O O M * T H E F E L L O W S H I P OF T H E R I N G MOULIN ROUGE

Best O r i g i n a l M u s i c a l Score A.I. A R T I F I C I A L I N T E L L I G E N C E J o h n Williams A B E A U T I F U L M I N D James Horner H A R R Y P O T T E R J o h n Williams *THE F E L L O W S H I P OF T H E RING H o w a r d Shore M O N S T E R S , INC. Randy N e w m a n Achievement in film editing A B E A U T I F U L M I N D M i k e H i l l and Dan Hanley B L A C K H A W K D O W N Pietro Scalia T H E F E L L O W S H I P OF T H E R I N G J o h n Gilbert M E M E N T O Dody Dorn * M O U L I N R O U G E Jill Bilcock A c h i e v e m e n t i n v i s u a l effects A.I. A R T I F I C I A L I N T E L L I G E N C E * T H E F E L L O W S H I P OF T H E R I N G PEARL HARBOR * Felix O n F i l m p r e d i c t i o n

Felix O n F i l m C o m p e t i t i o n W h e n a routine drug deal goes bad. Clayton Pierce, anti-terrorist agent, w o r k i n g undercover, finds out that the deal is actually... a nuclear bomb. Starring W i l l i a m M c N a m a r a , Roy Scheider, and D i n a Meyer. In a w o r l d where the truth is power. A n d p o w e r is the truth. A l l it takes... is a lapse in time. Time Lapse is a straight-to-video B-movie, w h i c h you have another chance to w i n . It is very, very good. We have T i m e Lapse on Video and D V D to give away. Just answer the following question: W h a t year d i d the first Oscar a w a r d s c e r e m o n y take place? a) 1928 b) 1924 c)1910 A n s w e r s to: film.felix@ic.ac.uk

coffee break

Crossword by Mummy Huffwell 1.

10.

11.

Across 1. She alone sounds like 5.

Down 1. Listen, talk, gossip. (7)

an imp's death car. (7) Chinese et ring w r o n g

Right level reserves for

number. (7)

J a m a i c a n guy. (5) Avoiding museum caught in bent sieve.

A British painter doesn't vote.(9) 11. C h a r g e man with

13.

12.

spots. (5) 14.

15.

17.

16.

20.

19.

22.

23.

18.

21.

25.

stupid, stupid. (13) Disaster stormed over junction fronts. (7)

12. A n i m a t e s b a c k w a r d s removi ng drug endurance. (7) 13. Hat has four points too

6. 7.

Criminals cause great w o r r y to queens. (9)

much, bizarrely (7) 14. A l u m i n i u m yitrium

Royal duck rats. (7)

damages

sulphur, in the living, tests for alcohol. (13)

10. M i x e d currants are at

15. Nice cops drool about crime scene barriers

14. Skilled speaker bill in Universal silver mud-

(6, 7) 19. Southern peacekeepers followed by l a i d

dle. (9) 15. Spot beat mixed w i t h

back timekeeper. 24.

(7) A m a z i n g l y drink felix

(3,4)

20. Not any one in lands.

food w a g o n . (10, 3)

underground drink. (7) 16. W e e p e r swallows odds,

it's

crunchy. (7) (7) 17. U t o p i a testicles conHey there packers. Another crossword from the delightful M u m m y 22. Take over A m e r i c a , you are soft! (5) tain drugs. (7) Huffwell for you to peruse over this week, I hope it is to your taste. Cyclops and I are getting very excited because soon w e ' l l be able to go 23. Sailor may snatch 18. M e s s u p penny, the and spend copious amounts of College money on coffee break prizes for awkwardly. (9) queen, angela and you crazy kids. A s you may already know, w e ' l l be giving away a PS2 for 24. E n v i r o n m e n t a l l y elizabeth. (7) the w i nner of the crossword, and w h o knows w h a t for the w i nner of the friendly Los A n g e l e s is palace. 21. B u c k i n g h a m mighty G F Q Q . The crossword prize d r a w w i l l take place on the last out to get bigger. (7) D'oh! (5) week of the spring term and I'll announce the winner of the PS2 in the 25. Substitute is about to first edition of next term. We thought it w a s fairer to end the competistart tennis. (7) tions at Easter, as people come back at different times in the summer. The w i nner of this w e e k ' s crossword is Adrian Rogers, J M C 3 . This A n s w e r to 1228 - Across: Sleeper, Stunner, Daredevil, young w e b - w i z a r d e-mailed his answers to coffee.felix@ic.ac.uk, as you E d w i n , Sprog, Retaliate, Supreme, Suckers, Blossom, are all w e l c o m e to do; or just fold your grid into a paper airplane and fly Elastic, Vengeance, Pupil, Rests, Irregular, A s s u m e d , it on d o w n to the Felix office i n the w e s t basement of Beit quad. Wrestle. Well that's all for another week, keep those crosswords coming in and D o w n : Sadists, Error, Pedigrees, Reverse, Salutes, keep reaching for that rainbow! Ureal, N e w s a g e n t , Ringers, Prognosis, C h a m p a g n e , Dr. Hot Fudge Bavaria, M a n k i n d , Eyebrow, Calorie, E p s o m , Pilot.

break coffee

G F Q Q - The Great Felix Quote Quiz by Bobby Cyclops & Dr. Hot Fudge 1. "Nobody tosses a dwarf!"

Number of players: 65

2. "A wink from a pretty girl at a party results rarely in climax, Karl. But a man is a fool not to push a suggestion as far as it will go."

The Leader B o a r d - top 15 Name Score Daniel Sauder 120.5 Christopher Dent 118 Chris Ince 117.5 A n t h o n y Rodriques Simon North A n d r e w Ince

3. "Hmmm. Much anger in him, like his father." 4 . "Do you think he's a saint or something? Because of the way he looks? 1 don't think he is." 5. "I was hired to kill you. But I'm not going to. It's either because I'm in love with your daughter or I have a newfound respect for life." 6 . "It can't be bargained with! It can't be reasoned with! It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead!"

you...

...enjoy w rit ing ? ...care a b o u t the i m p a c t of s c i e n c e a n d t e c h n o l o g y o n the w a y w e live? . . . w a n t t o publish your ideas?

1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7.

116 114

John A n d e r s o n

113.5 112

M i c h a e l Simonds Fred M a r q u i s

89.5 85.5

Chris Toffis Rebekah H y m a s

A r o s h a Bandara Gregory M a n n

62.5 61

Geoff Lay

59.5 58

K i m Randell

A n s w e r s to coffee.felix@ic.ac.uk or to the Felix Office - West W i n g Basement, Beit Quad.

A n s w e r s to last w e e k ' s quotes Morpheus/Laurence Fishburne - The M a t r i x Number J o h n n y ' 5/Tim Blaney (voice) - Short Circuit Pvt. J i m Paxton/Matthew Davis - Tigerland Rick Blaine/Humphrey Bogart - C a s a b l a n c a Winston Wolf/Harvey Keitel - Pulp Fiction Lucus Jackson/Paul N e w m a n - Cool H a n d Luke Ruby Rhod/Chris Tucker - The Fifth Element G F Q Q Prize Update!

Then why

n o t t a k e p a r t in

WRITING THE

FUTURE

A n e w w r i t i n g challenge for UG a n d P G s t u d e n t s at Imperial College W a t c h for

details in your department school

Challenge

starts early

February

Finalists to be chosen from each department/school. Medals for departmental winners. College Editorial Panel selects papers for publication. Editor: Ann Shearer, RLF Writing Fellow

Time to talk prizes, and w e need your feedback. Fudge and I have foolishly been given ÂŁ300 to give away, but w e w a n t to k n o w w h a t you want. For example, you could have a D V D player w i t h a selection of DVDs, or a really good D V D player w i t h no D V D s , or maybe an X-Box, or a PS2 w i t h games, or just ÂŁ300 w o r t h of vouchers - the choice is yours! So w i t h your answers this w e e k could you put a note saying w h a t sort of prize you w o u l d like, t h e n Fudge and I w i l l put the wheels in motion - only a few weeks left! N o w for a joke: I w a s driving to work the other day w h e n the boss rang and said: "You've been promoted." I w a s so shocked I s w e r v e d , narrowly avoiding a small dog. Later on there w a s another call - the boss: " W e l l done - I'm promoting you again." Startled, I swerved, this time having a lucky escape w i t h a Granny. W h e n I w a s nearly at work the phone rang once more - the boss! "Congratulations, you're n o w a chief executive!." This w a s all too m u c h for me... I lost control and w ent straight into a w a l l - a write-off. W h e n I finally got to work, the boss demanded w h y I w a s late. M y reply: "I careered of the road". Bobby Cyclops

F r i d a y Tuesday

22nd

Wednesday Thursday

26th

union • S B : play

M MPKARMA IN m MILL OVT IN m m to cool wnv* •

UNION QUIZ NIGHT s p o n s o r e d by

8pm-2am £2.00 In Fancy Dress/ £2.50 Guests & Others 50p from each entry donated to RAG Friday Night Out Supported by

Prizes: £50 & beer

W K D Joke Competition

8pm-2am from the Union Reception £1 U n i o n / £ 1 . 5 0 Guests Doors 7:30pm Late Night Hot Food £3 Union/£3.50 Guests

8:30pm/FREE@the union

Vine*'*

F r i d a y Tuesday 5th

UNION QUIZ NIGHT

Pisco

T o n y L a w Purchase advance tickets

l>*

1st

^union dis: play

Winner of the 1995 Glastonbury Festival New Act Competition, comic Tony Law has firmly established himself as a regular standup on the UK circuit.

Wednesday Thursday 7th vj*

Aunjon display