HUNGAPPA
FR EE
An Open Letter To CSU Shows - By Tom Butler Swagtember Fashion Fever Psych Club Eastern Uni Games USA To Aus - By Selene Castillo The Blur Between The Worlds - By Rachel Dianne
rivcollsrc
Made by students, for students.
Š2014
!
TERM 3, ISSUE 9
Editor in Chief Brandon Harry Graphic Designer Tyhe Reading Printery CSU Print Photographer Keelan Hogie Website facebook.com/rivcollSRC Email Hungappa@Rivcoll.com Twitter: https://twitter.com/hungappa CONRTIBUTORS
CONTENTS An Open Letter To CSU - 5 Shows - By Tom Butler - 8 Swagtember - 10 Fashion Fever - 12 Psych Club - 14 Eastern Uni Games - 21 USA To Aus - By Selene Castillo - 26 The Blur Between The Worlds - By Rachel Dianne - 28
Tom Butler Rachel Dianne Laura Boyd Selene Castillo Leah Ellis Demi Spencer
CLASSIC HUNG Letter From The Editor - 3 Crow Bar Photos - 16 Stalker Space and Vox Pop - 22 Ask Patty - 23
DISCLAIMER Hungappa is a Rivcoll SRC publication and the opinions expressed within are not necessarily those of the editor, staff or student members. Association by person or companies with ‘Hungappa’ does not necessarily reflect the religious, political, sexual, or racial beliefs of those parties. The editor and Rivcoll SRC do not accept responsibility for any omission, errors, misconceptions or the views and opinions contained in any article accepted for publication. The editor reserves the right to edit or reject any articles submitted for publication.
2
Hungappa Fungappa - 32 Taste - 34
Deadline All submissions for the next edition of the HUNGAPPA must be submitted to the Editor via the official email address of the magazine. All submissions must have been submitted by 27th August 2014.
LETTER FROM THE EDITOR Waggarians, I am really glad that we are almost on holidays again, I just really enjoy having no reason why I can’t just lay on the couch all day and watch Ellen and Dr Phil re-runs. I promise I do more with my time, not too much more, but a little bit more than that. We’ve had a really great time at the Hungappa for the first term of this session! So many more contributors, a touching Stalker Space and an anonymous Letter to the Editor writer! We hope that everyone has enjoyed the change up in the Hungappa and that you might even be thinking of contributing yourself. Rivcoll SRC has currently been looking into some of the big issues that face our students: academic support, residence cost, facilities upgrades and maintenance,
events and so many more. The SRC is now asking for student input! We want to know what you would like to see change on your campus. What do we have down pat and what can we improve upon? Throughout the next couple of weeks and in the new term you will see some of your SRC Reps walking around, asking question, handing out surveys, or just waiting for you to talk to them. So get thinking and let us know! See you all at Final Fling! Brandon Harry Editor In Chief hungappa@rivcoll.com
LETTER TO THE EDITOR I guess I owe some more apologies. By no means be expecting a new apology each week because most weeks I shouldn’t need one and the weeks I do I probably won’t mean it anyway, but I do feel the need to apologise to all those people that had to read the drivel I spouted last week. I’m not exactly sure how much pot I smoked to think that was good, but one could probably assume it had about the same mass as an average new-born. Sure writing it felt fine, but re-reading it made me want to claw my eyes out and obviously only one of us writes it whereas all of you people have to read it. I’ll be honest I was so put out by how poor my last piece was that I wasn’t going to write another this week, a fact that is augmented by me not actually having anything to write about, but I already covered how difficult it is to think up this shit in issue six, so there’s no way I’m going into that again. I actually wasn’t going to write a piece this week, but the ineffable editor messaged me and specifically asked which I thought was strange considering, but he assures me that I’ve become a regular now. Also strange considering I’ve only done two pieces, and I don’t know in what world two equals regular. My big problem at the moment is that I’ve got a lot of really good half ideas, but nothing I can talk about in enough substance to fill out a whole page. Add to this that EIC has demanded I cover topics relevant to the Uni I’m struggling to find a suitable point to analyse in any form of depth, so we’ll have to settle for something shallower. Mid-session exams are coming up soonish, which I’m sure has many of us worried (at least, those of us
doing real degrees) personally I have 4 to get through, 3 pre-mid-session break, and another in the first week of thanks to res-school. On top of that many of you probably have major assignments due in the next couple weeks which are of course cause for concern. One thing I’ve always been thankful for in a science degree is a distinct lack of assignments. Not that I have none, but more that they’re far less plentiful than I’m sure the artsy-fartsy students have to deal with. I know some people claim that assignments are easier and to some extent it’s true, but at the same time I don’t have the commitment to work on them slowly over time, so I tend to crush them out in the final 24 hours anyway, and typically they take longer to write than the 2-3 hours I spend working on an exam. The obvious benefit of assignments over exams is that you don’t actually need to KNOW anything as you have boundless resources at your finger-tips, but just the time it takes to transcribe this information is enough to drive me batty. While I’m here I’m going to take the opportunity to remind you about the benefits of maintaining a health sex-life, emphasis on the “healthy”. There’s been higher than average level of discussion at least around my circles about sex, particularly friends with benefits, and while who/when/how you have sex is your own concern, if you start peeing blood someone has to clean that up, your friends have to hear you complain, anyone else you bang gets the problem. It’s just not worth it. Use a condom, get tested. Sincerely yours Edward Nygma
3
4
AN OPEN LETTER TO CSU By Laura Boyd
Thanks to you, CSU. It’s been a long, cold, confusing first couple of weeks back. But as always, coming back to Uni felt like returning home. There are a few special people and places at this Campus that bring a multitude of emotions to my life on a weekly basis, and after this week in particular, I’d like to take a moment to thank you all. Firstly, I’d like to say thanks to everyone who attended the ‘Back to School’ festivities at the crow bar. Particularly those who gave me a sneak peek of their genitalia because their skirts resembled bottomless underwear. Surprisingly, this is more relevant to the boys, as many of you decided cross-dressing was a good idea in the 2 degree Celsius weather. I’m definitely not traumatised at all. Thanks to The Nosh/Hub/Eat@20 or whatever that joint is called for not having an eftpos machine at the payment counter. Seriously. Thanks. It’s not even awkward when there are fifty-two people behind me, subs in hand. But actually, even the forum 6 cinema has an eftpos machine now. Come on. I don’t want to withdraw $20 every time I want a bottle of water, so help a sister out. Thank you to everyone who insisted on wearing thongs to uni this week. You made me feel super satisfied my life choices. You’re totally right though; covered footwear in winter is for narks. All the hip kids have frostbite these days. Thank you CSU for sending cleaners to the Communication and Creative Industries toilets once in a blue moon. I’ve had the immense pleasure of watching a tiny family of spiders grow and develop over the past five months and it has been a very touching experience. I feel emotionally connected to every spider in the toilet block and I cheer every time I see them trap a new bug for dinner in their impressive web structures. Thank you to the library café for having basically identical cinnamon and chocolate powder shakers. The five teaspoons of cinnamon I accidentally poured on my mocha a few days ago made me very alert and ready to conquer the day. Well played. Thanks to the folks on the second floor of the library who sit at the tiny brown study desks but still conduct everyday conversations. I actually didn’t come to the library to study. I know, crazy. It may be full of books and free wifi, but I actually came here hoping it would be extremely loud and that I would get to listen to you talk about why the Vic is better than Romano’s. You’re wrong, by the way.
5
SHOWS If you’ve been paying any attention at all to the televisual landscape since the dawn of the millennium, I don’t have to tell you how good we’ve currently got it. There have arguably been more amazing shows come and go in the past thirteen or so years alone than ever existed in the whole of the 20th century. Maybe that sounds like a hefty claim and anyone who was actually around for The Simpsons/Seinfeld glory days has probably stopped reading now, but then again, when you consider the quality of both sitcoms and dramas across the board, from Arrested Development to Deadwood, 30 Rock to The Wire, both UK and US versions of The Office, and the recently departed, still dearly missed Breaking Bad, it’s hard not to feel like the Golden Age of Television is upon us. Of course, ages by their definition function within a specific time period that is destined to end and there’s no shortage of chatter, on-and-offline, suggesting that this particular era of serialized prosperity has passed us by. To those pessimists, my response is simply to offer…
The Top 5 Television shows of the First Half of 2014
5
(Tie) Community (Season 5) / Rick and Morty (Season 1)
Both of these shows exist, at least partially, thanks to the industrious Dan Harmon, a sardonically witty and dangerously intelligent man whose writing is informed by his encyclopaedic knowledge of pop culture and surprisingly sentimental bent. The first show centres on a gaggle of lovable misfits at Greendale Community College and if you don’t already know and love it, I hate you, because you people are the reason it’s almost been cancelled like a gazillion times (well, not really, but you know what I mean… #SIXSEASONSANDAMOVIE!) The latter is an animated sci-fi smorgasbord co-created by Harmon and Justin Roiland, who voices both Rick, an aged alcoholic scientist, and his nebbish grandson Morty, as the story largely follows their many ill-advised adventures to other planets and dimensions. Are you torn between which of these awesome shows to check out first? Here’s my advice: if you like improbably
6
By Tom Butler good-looking people (and Chevy Chase) having whipsmart conversations, hooking up and acting out your favourite movies, then Community; if you think Dr. Who would be better as a foulmouthed cartoon with way more butt jokes, definitely Rick and Morty. Community highlight: Episode 4, “Cooperative Polygraphy”, in which (SPOILERS… sort of, I guess) the study group bids farewell to a core member in the most hilarious and disarmingly poignant way imaginable. This might seriously be the best episode of Community ever. Rick and Morty highlight: Episode 8, “Rixty Minutes”, in which Rick, Morty and their family watch TV. For pretty much the whole episode. Oh, and the channels are from every conceivable dimension. However beautifully weird you’re imagining that to be, you have utterly no idea.
4
Mad Men (Season 7, Part 1)
In my opinion, this is the smartest television show ever made. That doesn’t necessarily make it my all-time favourite, though it’s certainly up there, nor is that label intended to ward off people who are disinclined toward pretentious writing and highbrow plotting. Actually, the overarching plot is the least complicated thing about Mad Men: the show, at least initially, centres on the staff at the Sterling Cooper ad agency on Madison Avenue, beginning at the dawn of the swinging 60’s and, during the current season, drawing the revolutionary decade to a reeling close. Truly, though, one of Mad Men’s most sagacious aspects is in its examination of the 1960’s as a means of commenting on the present day, all while maintaining a thematic focus on the ephemeral nature of desire glimpsed through the medium of advertising. One of the larger issues the show addresses is the nature of inherent privilege, dissecting the tumbling of the white male hierarchies of the era incited by the second wave movement of women’s liberation and prominent freedom fighters like Martin Luther King, all of which is shrouded with a wry retrospective knowledge of what the future holds. However, even with all of these topical balls in the air, the writers are sure to never sacrifice elegant dialogue and character progression in the name of BIG THEMES. As fascinating as I find the history, to me the most intelligent part of this show remains the discerning care with which these characters are formed, often causing me to think of them as real historical figures and wonder how they would regard
the world as it exists today, which they unknowingly helped to forge. Highlight: Episode 2, “A Day’s Work”, in which everyone’s innate racism bubbles over to inflict itself on the office’s newest employees, two canny black secretaries, all while leading man Don Draper takes a day to bond with his teenage daughter, achieving perhaps his most honest moment of connection in the run of the series.
3
Fargo (Season 1)
This small screen adaptation of the Coen brothers’ majestically strange film of the same name is simply— Pardon me, what was that? You haven’t seen the original Fargo? Well, I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to insist that you go and get around that shit, like, right now. Seriously, go. I’ll wait… You’re back? Good. Awesome movie, right? Anyway, this show pretty much picks up where the movie left off, focussing on the unusually violent levels of criminal activity taking place across several small towns in the state of Minnesota, shocking the plainspoken, unassuming residents. It’s also approximately a thousand times better than a show based on a classic movie deserves to be, so there’s that too. Additionally, the plot manages to be a solid deviation from the source material, chiefly regarding the travails of the pathetically submissive Lester Nygaard, played by English actor Martin Freeman with a remarkably natural “Minnesota nice” accent, as his encounter with Lorne Malvo (aka Billy Bob Thornton, aka The freakin’ Devil) shoves him towards a life of vile, murderous chicanery. Incipiently, the show seems like it may be setting us up for a confrontation twixt Nygaard and Malvo as the metaphysical representation of good versus evil, before introducing the effervescent Allison Tolman as Deputy Molly Solverson to play the unlikely hero of the story. From there, everything snowballs into an unexpectedly satisfying and wonderfully chaotic exploration of the theological and real-world implications of the forces that spur us ever onwards into this cosmically unknowable existence. Also, there’s snow. So much snow. Highlight: Episode 9, “A Fox, a Rabbit and a Cabbage”, in which Lester, despite all odds, connives his way into being the most evil, monstrous and unsympathetic character on television ever, and yes, that’s including Walter White and Prince Joffrey. Also, we find out Malvo’s sex fetish… and it is soooo not what you would think.
2
Hannibal (Season 2)
Speaking of shows based on old school movies that no one expected to be anything more than a cheapass cash grab, here’s the phenomenal Hannibal, a prequel to the psychological horror The Silence of the Lambs, with further inspiration drawn from the Thomas Harris novels that spawned the infamous character of Hannibal “The Cannibal” Lecter. What allows this show to achieve an immensely high level of appeal is a heady mixture of gorgeously saturated visuals, a consistently haunting soundtrack, supremely restrained acting on all fronts and a savvy approach to the writing that mingles subtlety with a cheeky self-awareness, resulting in an abundance of cannibalistic puns (my personal favourite of Hannibal’s lines: “I have no taste for animal cruelty. That’s why I employ an ethical butcher.”) In the nascent episodes of this resoundingly bloodthirsty programme, creator Bryan Fuller offered up a dual character piece, dealing with the bizarrely intimate relationship that bloomed between unorthodox FBI profiler Will Graham, portrayed by the unreasonably handsome Hugh Dancy, and the eponymous serial killer, given life by the chilling Mads Mikkelsen in my favourite television performance this side of Bryan Cranston. This second instalment mostly confronts the detrimental fallout from the previous season, finding plenty of opportunities along the way to muse philosophically on the nature of murder, paternity, trust and, most saliently, the extent of one’s own personal… taste. You’re welcome. Highlight: Episode 12, “Tome-wan”, in which Will and Hannibal develop a weirdly protective relationship over Margot Verger and so become targeted by her engrossingly vile brother, Mason, leading to a thrilling showdown in a piggery. Afterwards, Hannibal manages to convince Mason to— Wait… wait, what is he— Oh God, WHAT IS HE DOING?! No, no, no. No! NOOOO! What… the actual… fuck. Dude.
7
1
Game of Thrones (Season 4)
I don’t feel like I have to spend a lot of time on this one, because if you’ve managed to live the past four years without any interaction with this show then I’d like to congratulate you on your successful occupation of the Earth’s core. Were the subterranean goblins a problem to deal with or did you guys find a way to cohabitate? You know what, doesn’t matter, let’s keep the mystery alive. So, this is an epic series based on George R. R. Martin’s A Song of Fire and Ice saga involving ice demons, warring factions, dark magic and dragons, but it’s not as impenetrably nerdy as that sounds. It’s basically just a fantasy soap opera and, additionally, not even nearly as terrible as that sounds. Yes, the characters encounter all manner of seismic events including revelations of estranged family members, intermarital affairs and unexpected deaths, but it all contains more weight than your typical Home and Away instalment because (and I can’t stress this enough) we actually give a shit about the characters. That and dragons are unassailably bad-ass. Highlight: Episode 8, “The Mountain and the Viper”, in which a lot of things happen. Honestly, so many long-gestating plot points pay off in this episode that it’d be hard to detail everything succinctly in less than a couple of paragraphs. But then we come to those last ten minutes or, rather, the last ten minutes, the superlative concluding scenes by which every subsequent episode (and probably every other show) shall henceforth be graded against. There has never been a moment quite like the final words exchanged between the two warriors that give this episode its title. To aptly describe it, I would like to indulge in a phrase that those who have not seen the episode will consider criminally overused and those who have seen it will find involuntarily cringeinducing: Mind. Blowing.
5 Other Shows to Check Out Archer Vice (Season 5) The uproariously funny and strangely inept secret agents that star in this animated show are back, on a perilous mission to… sell a metric ton of cocaine. Danger zone, right?
How I Met Your Mother (Season 9) The choice to include this long running sitcom’s final season comes with the caveat that you do not watch the last episode under any circumstances, as it is aggressively terrible. Seriously.
I Wanna Marry ‘Harry’ This selection is ironic, an abhorrent reality show that I wouldn’t discourage you from actually watching, though I can’t guarantee that prolonged exposure won’t result in adverse effects, like… sadness.
Orange Is The New Black (Season 2) The first season of this dramedy, set in a women’s prison, is my favourite new show of 2013. If this second instalment is even half as good, it’s worth it.
Walking Dead (Season 4, Part 2) Want compelling fantasy? Game of Thrones. Good writing? Mad Men. Nuanced acting/character development? Hannibal. But how about if you want to see some extremely well-done, gory zombie attack sequences? Bingo.
8
9
“DID SOMEONE SAY... SLEEPOVER AT THE CROW BAR?� YES JOHNNY, THEY DID.
Thursday 18th September 7:30pm - Friday 19th 7:30am
@ THE CROW BAR
This September, CSU will be hosting a sleep-out to raise funds for Street Swags, an organisation committed to providing emergency relief to the homeless. Every $60 donated provides a street swag to a homeless person as a practical solution when they cannot find accommodation. These swags are waterproof, UV resistant sleeping swags. They can be strung up like a lean-to style tent, and folded up into a carry bag during the day. They offer protection from the weather and unwanted attention. Street Swags needs our help. They have had a waiting list of 1,500 for the past 8 months, and unfortunately, homelessness in Australia is increasing. Last year, their annual event, Swagtember, raised $40,000, through sleep-outs, bake sales and other fundraising activities. This year, CSU aims to help their cause by hosting a mass sleep-out across its 5 major campuses. Students are invited to register, and get sponsored to spend a night at their campus. There will be prizes for the biggest fundraisers, as well as free food, a pillow fight tournament, live entertainment, pillow fort building, open mic, movies on the big screen, and a BBQ breakfast (these will vary across campuses). Distance students are also encouraged to participate, either by attending their nearest campus, or by hosting their own events.
10
“HOW DO I GET INVOLVED?” I HEAR YOU ASK..
11
FASHION FEVER By Laura Boyd
The last decade has seen considerably less fashion change than the leaps that took place between the decades of the 20th century. Unlike the scenarios anticipated in most films of the 90s we are not yet dressing in metallic or plastic clothing. The truth is the year 2014 is a mix of styles and sensations taking inspiration from every time and culture. From the conservatively clad (yet free spirited) hipsters with their high necked dresses to the barely dressed hip-hop-happening 21st centurers with their crop tops and underpant sized shorts. Fashion is so many things these days, from awesome to daring to the plain bizarre. So let us look now at some basic fashion donts that should still be followed in this modern time of fashion freedom. 1. Jeans That Don’t Fit Properly We live in a time where there are 6 million different jeans styles: boot cut, flare, straight leg, skinny leg, low-rise, ultra-low-rise, mid-rise, high-rise, boyfriend, slim etc etc etc. So , no more jeans that show off your entire bottom. No more jeans that make your legs look like sausages. No more jeans that are so shredded at the bottom because they’re 6 years too big. No more jeans that are so tight they make you look like an uneven hour glass. There are so many online guides, store managers, friends and mirrors waiting to tell you which type of jeans are the ones for you. Don’t waste your life with the wrong jeans, unlike your genes -these are ones you can control. 2. Ugg Boots in Public Now, before I start I will point out the obvious exceptions to this rule. If you are sick, going to a pajama themed event or wearing them with apple bottom jeans in the event of ‘getting low’ (in which case the whole club will be looking at you for other reasons, regardless of show choice). BUT ugg boots are not a real shoe, they are intended for warmth and comfort around your own home, much like a slipper – one could even say they are a slipper. They ESPECIALLY are not to be worn with football shorts or short shorts. If you’re cold wear pants, ugg boots aren’t helping while the rest of your body hangs out for the world to see. Keep your ugg boots at home along with your baggy swear pants are your reeboks with the straps. 3. Thos High Helled Runner Things
12
I am reffering here to the trend of wearing sports like looking shoes that are actually high heels. Joggers and jeans are no more acceptable just because they make you taller. If anything they’re the most unattractive show I have come across to date (and yes I am placing that above crocs and flippers). Are you planning to go to the club and do some sprints? (In which case you’ll break an ankle.) Are you planning to go the gym and do some runway training? (In which case you’ll be judged harshly.) Even female body lifters, who essentially are the combination of gym goddesses and models don’t wear this morphed shoe abomination. They wear heels to model and joggers
FASHION FEVER to train. Each shoe has a specific purpose, there is no need to mush them together. 4. Boyfriend Jeans 4) 4. I don’t want to see your panties, your tracks of land, muffin top or what you had for breakfast. Bras are not shirts, neither are crop tops – unless you’re 6 and a gymnast. Shorts that are the same length as your underpants, or shorter than their pockets are not clothing, that is a rag which is intended for wiping oil at the mechanics or cleaning glass. Lycra is not a viable option unless you’re in a costume or planning to cycle away while I cringe at your outfit. Mini skirts should be longer than a belt. Low cut does not mean I want to be able to see the entirety of your mammaries. If you have to get a bikini wax in order to wear an outfit in the outside world, you need to rethink your whole life. 5. HUGE Drawn On Eyebrows WHAT EVEN IS THIS TREND. You were born with eyebrows, waxing them off then drawing them back on is ridiculous. Drawing more eyebrows on top of your eyebrows is also ridiculous. You are literally millimetres away from the monobrow you so easily criticise. You are exceptionally worse if you have blonde hair and draw black caterpillars on your forehead. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, it looks like leeches are living on your face. 6. Tight Pants That Are The Same Colour As Your Skin This is a disaster waiting to happen. Maybe you want the scandal, maybe you want the double take of strangers, maybe all that ‘is he/she, isn’t he/she’ attention is what you live for. Well let me tell you, everybody things you’re not wearing pants and that you look like a tool. Now, I realise I have been perhaps a little harsh here and I certainly don’t mean to offend. But seriously guys, we’re letting the team down. People of the past died thinking that we’d be wearing cool geometric shapes, metallic suits and latex. We’re here in the 21st century dressing like aliens who painted very scarce parts of themselves with glue and rolled around throughout time. Lets make better choices and show the future that we were cool. I 100% do not apologise for my opinion of thick, black, drawn on eye brows. Stahp.
12
13
BAR NIGHT
TIGHT & BRIGHT
SRC CARNIVAL
TIGHT & BRIGHT
SRC CARNIVAL
TIGHT & BRIGHT
18 12
SRC CARNIVAL
TIGHT & BRIGHT
19 13
20
EASTERN UNI GAMES 2015 By Ellie Parker
Charles Sturt University (CSU) in Wagga Wagga has been announced as the next university to host the annual Eastern University Games in 2015. The games will provide incredible opportunities for CSU students everywhere and allow other university students to see how great the CSU community is.
EUGS are for YOU. Students will have to be enrolled in the current session (201530) and be ready to represent Charles Sturt University at one of the most exciting events of the year!
The 2015 EUGs will provide CSU students with a number of great opportunities to be involved with one of the largest annual sporting events held in NSW and the ACT. Students will have the opportunity to represent their university in over 16 different sports, volunteer in areas such as media, event management or just help behind the scenes.
Basketball (men and women)
For CSU Wagga, this unique opportunity will give them exposure to over 3000 other university students and a chance to showcase what a regional university has to offer. Due to the timing of the games (5 – 10 July 2015), there will be no Residential Schools held on the Wagga campus during this week. Student Support Officer, Niklaus Granger, is hopeful that plenty of CSU students will be involved at the EUGS next year. “It is our hope to have a CSU team in each division of every sport, and in some cases multiple teams to help CSU try and claim the Overall Points score trophy, something we have not achieved since hosting the Eastern University Games in 2009 in Bathurst. We would really like to have more CSU student involved, in particularly any Distance Education students wishing to represent their University.” For the games to be as successful as possible, students need to start organising teams as soon as possible. Niklaus says there is already a great deal of interest, and that “We will want to register our strongest teams possible, this may mean that we hold trials early next year.”
There are sports for everyone, and include: AFL 9’s (men and mixed) Football (men and women) Futsal (men and women) Golf (men and women) Hockey (men and women) Indoor Cricket (open) Lawn Bowls (open) Netball (women and mixed) Oztag (men and mixed) Squash (men and women) Tennis (men and women) Tenpin Bowling (open) Touch Football (men, women and mixed) Ultimate Frisbee (mixed) Volleyball (men and women) Water Polo (men and women) Those interested in participating should nominate their sport at: https://student.csu.edu.au/ campus/sport-and-uni-games/university-games/ uni-games-sport-nomination To keep up to date with any event developments and CSU in general at CSU, visit facebook.com/CSUSport
Whether you’re an internal student on the Wagga campus or a distance education student – the 21
CSU Stalker Space To that person or place that you want to creep on or whinge about!
VOX POP What TV Series really makes you procrastinate?
To H, We spent one amazing night together. We laughed, cuddled and it felt like I’d known you forever. I love you, please let me know you forever.
Genevieve Waller: Orange is the New Black, so addicted!
- LoveStruck To the guy in 201, Your toned body and reluctance to dress for the cold has become too much for me. It also doesn’t help that you use words such as spanking in a casual context. That is not a casual word, shorts are not a casual winter attire, sitting with your arms flexed above your head is not a casual position. Please stop, actually don’t. - UghYes To CSU, Why are our lecture theatres shit?
Meagan Rees: I’m doing criminal minds again too!
- Love AllStudents To the Hub, In particular to the girl who discounted my lunch till I could afford it. You reaffirmed my faith in humanity! You didn’t have to do what you did, but you did, and I think you deserve recognition for it!
Haidee Studholme : Yeah, uh Pokemon haha
- IThinkYou’reGreat To the guy who sometimes plays table tennis in the nosh, With the large glasses, facial hair and fashion sense of the 80s. You look like you walked out of another time. I would love nothing more than to return to 1980 with you and be your housewife and look after our adorable kids. Please never change. - WifeMe To the guy in TV (I think), The way you wear anything makes me want to not wear anything. Maybe we can do it together sometime? - DoMe
Submit your creepy thoughts to us on Facebook or email. xoxo 22
Sophie Thornton: Breaking Bad. All that meth is a little.... addictive....
Dear Mrs. Patty,
I am an 18-year-old student. I recently slept with a guy at work and he has not paid attention to me since. I have totally fallen for him.
We have been friends since I started there and he always was shy. Why won’t he speak to me, let alone date me? HopelessInLove Dear Hopeless, It’s like you haven’t listened to any response I’ve written. Step one, get the ring then give them the goods. I suggest you channel the goddess Mrs Z, otherwise known as Beyonce, and sing him a bit of Single Ladies. Obviously he likes it, I doubt we live in a time where people undergo sexual acts without emotion or interest in the other person. Now if you are not one for singing I think the best options to make a giant gesture of love that will sweep him of his feet. The other options include, hiring a choir to sing whilst you throw rose petals on him, releasing doves that are trained to spell I love you in the sky or writing him a sonnet about how much you love him. If these don’t work, write back. Love always, Pat.
Dear Pat, I downloaded the app Tinder like 3 weeks ago and I quickly got addicted. To be honest I did get a little slutty at first but now I think I’ve fallen for someone.
The problem I have is that I’ve become that person… I want a Tinder girlfriend! Dude, is that okay or does that mean it’ll never work? TinderCurse
Dear Tinder Curse, I had to do a little research in order to understand your situation my dear, so I downloaded Tinder onto my smart phone. Never have I seen so many lovely faces who are up for a chat. There was also a very strange element where so many of them assumed I owned a cougar and used lingo I was so unaware of like milf, dtf and yolo. Aside from that I can see why you got addicted to the thing, so many lovely people wanting to compliment you. And don’t worry about being too ‘slutty’ I have 9 matches already, so I guess I’m being ‘slutty’ as well! Now, there’s no shame in finding the one you love online. My friend Susan met a wonderful man just last week on the internet and if she sends him $1000 he will be able to access his inheritance, fly over and they’ll be able to be together with a whole heap of cash too! Who said nobody lives happily ever after. As you can see, these romances definitely work and perhaps you’ll be lucky and she’ll be royalty, a prince emailed Anne last week.
Hope all goes well (and never call me dude), Pat.
Dear Pat, Since starting Uni 2 years ago I have been able to come out of my shell and find out who I am. I guess I know I’ve been gay since like 14 but I think I was just trying to deny it by pretending it didn’t exist.
Now, I am just over it. I want to tell everyone everything but I don’t know how. What do I do when people don’t accept me? Fab
Dear Fab,
With a name like that who was ever doubting? All I can say is, be you my dear. Once my friend Geraldine wanted to bring another woman to the quarterly knitting appreciation dinner and the ladies on the board were having kittens over it! Sally was so upset she spat out her dentures. But I’ll say to you now what I said to Geraldine then: we are here on this earth for such a short time and who wants to spend it unhappy. I don’t necessarily understand how you feel but you need to do what is true to your heart. Anybody who has enough hate inside them to be rude, mean or judgemental is clearly missing a piece of their heart. We were not put onto this planet to judge or condemn but to love everyone, from the lost and tormented to the confident and free. Anybody who wants to create perfection or happiness through hate and persecution will never achieve their goals. When you come against these people, which you will, know that you are capable of something they are not, love. Go out and love, love yourself, love the world and love the gender you love. All the best, Pat
Patty, She asked to be Simba’d and I just obliged. It was kind of hot but… Is that okay? InTheWild
Dear InTheWild, You need Jesus deary. Love, Pat
23
24
AG RACES And they’re off… It’s that time of year again CSU! It’s racing time. With Ag races only a few weeks away (20th September) it’s time to hit the stores to find the perfect outfit for the races. Because Ag College have a great line up of mares and stallions to tickle your fancy. It will be the 27th annual Agricultural races, so get behind it, with all proceeds from the event going to a good cause. On top of the races this year, the lovely women and men of Wagga Agricultural College have another event to thrill you with before the races. The Wagga Agricultural Inaugural Industry Ball, this is set to be the night before Ag races, Friday the 19th September. The only formal event on the calendar that gives students from: Agricultural Science, Agriculture Business Management and anyone else who wants to come a chance to meet with industry representatives from the cotton industry to the chicken meat industry. It plans to be a night of networking, gaining experience and possible employment opportunities for after university. With inspirational guest speakers lined up and the mighty yak hitting up some tunes, it plans to be a night not to miss. And if you still want more Agricultural Cocktails will be held upstairs at Romano’s on the 13th of September. So get your cocktail dresses out ladies and ties out men, tickets are $25 includes two cocktails and nibbles. Cheap cocktails are planned so make sure you don’t have class on Thursday morning people, because it might be a rough one. Well that’s the wrap up from Ag College, get keen CSU, we plan to see you there!
25
USA TO AUS CONTINUED By Selene Castillo
“USA to AUS” continued… I’ve had a couple Aussies ask me what I had heard about Australia while in the US... Unfortunately the answer is, “hardly anything”. I’m sure the first things Americans think about when they hear “Australia” it’s Kangaroos, Steve Irwin, and the words “Down Under” and “mate”. It’s well known that the US participates in selective teaching, so throughout my education I’ve been taught whatever the US government wants me to learn which sadly doesn’t include much about Australia. Believe me when I say that I felt ignorant as heck when an Aussie told me that Australia was in one or both (see, there I go again) of the World Wars. I am also surprised by how much Aussies know about the US! For example, most of you know who the US president is... that alone already surprises me. Also, I am in disbelief by how far in the world American media has reached. I was looking forward to having a movie night with my housemates where we could alternate from American to Australian movies but I quickly found out that they’ve seen nearly everything that I have.
Then I heard a couple of radio stations and some of them seem to only broadcast popular American music. I find all of this so strange; isn’t it annoying having to listen to our American accents all the time?! I was also shocked by the reaction I got when I said the n word… native. In the US we call our aboriginals Native Americans (or natives for short) and it’s ok to refer to them as such and even they do so. Personally, when I use the word native I mean that they’re the people who were there before the settlers and I don’t mean it in any derogatory way whatsoever. When I used that word, the Aussies I was talking with stared at me with a shocked expression and I thought, “oh gosh, what have I said now
26
that could be so offensive?” then they explained to me how the word sort of translates to a savage. Once I realized what I had said, I quickly explained to them why I used it and I felt a bit ashamed. Now on to demographics. In case you didn’t know, as a Mexican American in the US, I am a “minority” basically meaning that Caucasians are the “majority” which better translates to “superior”. Luckily I grew up in Southern California where there is so much diversity, empowerment, and liberation (at least compared to most other states). If I were to make my way east across my country I am sure I would experience many racist acts all the way until I reach New York or Florida, and I have heard horror stories. Even moving to Northern California I’ve seen huge changes in demographics. Coming to Australia, I’ve encountered many nice Aussies but I have to admit that I felt a lot more welcomed and comfortable in Sydney where I saw people of all sorts of tones, ethnicities and heard people speak my language, Spanish. On another note, Americans really can be the cocky people that are portrayed in the movies; it’s so true and is to the point where I (along with MANY of my multi-racial friends) hardly have any Caucasian friends… this is also why I am so much happier saying that I am Mexican than I am American. Coming to Australia I debated whether I should tell people that I’m American for the fear of getting that “ugh! American!” reaction, however, everyone has been so kind and I have yet to hear that from anyone.
27
28
The Blur Between Two Worlds By Rachael Dianne
They call them the living dead, the victims of severe violence. Once a year, for a period of 12 hours the town gathers at the Greenberg Memorial Hall for protection against the evil race. Until 1970, we never used to know when the dead would rise from their graves and attack the living. Many tried running, but they were always found. You cannot run from that which you have caused. The 1888 fire was the beginning. Our ancestors felt it wise to burn a woman believed of witch craft and before she died, she cast a curse upon the town, a curse never to be lifted. Now, once a year, those whom have died in vain within the town, rise again. For once you live in the town, you become the town. It was the night of November 1st, 1970, when the dead revealed their weakness. I was home alone when it occurred. My mother was out of town on business, she didn’t survive. This is the story of my survival, the beginning of Halloween... Scanning through the TV channels, I was eating my pop-corn when suddenly; I heard the screams of horror from my nearby neighbour. “It’s happening,” she shouted “Run!” Spilling the pop-corn as I leapt from my chair, I ran across the room to the window. Looking out through the fogged glass, I saw families running wildly across the street, chased by creatures that look like us but with a lust for human flesh. My face lit up in shock as my heart began to race uncontrollably; I’d never been
alone when the creatures of the dead attacked. Still gazing out the window, I watched one of those monsters sprint after my elderly neighbour Marie only to tackle her to the ground and begin chewing at her leg. She cried out in pain as I saw him rip into parts of her body like it was nothing, eating pieces of her flesh while rivers of her blood mixed with the water in the gutter nearby. Frozen, I stood still, not knowing what to do. My eye brows twitched while I watched from the window of my house as these foul creatures terrorised my neighbourhood. Still staring at my innocent neighbour’s mutilated corpse, I was a little slow to realise that the creature on her back was her late husband, Donavan. Without thinking, I screamed, and to my horror, he heard me. His head twitched instantly in my direction as blood spattered from his mouth. Terror spread across my face as I quickly turned off the lamp next to me and hid behind the curtain. Darkness filled the room as clouds covered the moon. I could feel my pulse quickening. With my body pressed firmly against the wall, I slowly glanced between gaps in the curtain while a shiver of dread crawled down my spine and to my comfort, he was gone. A sudden breath of relief came upon me as the tension in my shoulders eased, only to tense again when I heard a scratching sound at the door. Throwing my body against the wall, my head span with the room. Squeezing my eyes tight, I repeated in a panicky voice, “This can’t be happening”. The scratching became
29
The Blur Between Two Worlds By Rachael Dianne
more violent, but still I stood stiffly wall was really the lounge room against the wall. The noise grew, window and the tight sensation I ringing in my ears, until finally was feeling were the frozen fingers I couldn’t take it anymore and of a dead man. so I let out a loud, high pitched I started squealing as we began scream. And just like that, the playing a game of tug and pull scratching stopped. using my wrist as the toy. As my I took a moment to calm my vision moved between my wrist breathing before I carefully and his face, his eyes caught my peered out the window again. attention and I recognised him Looking into the darkness, I saw from the newspapers. “Jeremy?” no movement; the world was I whispered as I stopped resisting. quiet. My heart’s rhythm slowed I once had a crush on Jeremy; he as I relaxed my head against the was only 18 when he died. His window, gently closing my eyes. father shot him and his mother in anger once he found out his wife “Smack!” went a sharp sound was cheating on him. He kept as it rattled the window pane. them hidden for days, locked in a Jumping up in fear I let out a loud refrigerator in the basement. scream as I saw Donavan leaning against the glass, thumping his It wasn’t until I could feel a slight wrinkled, greyish green fist against itching agitation on my wrist that it. A pool of blood drooled from my I turned my attention towards his mouth as he faintly smiled. I the window sill where I could see could see the tire tread marks on more of them trying to squeeze his upper body from the accident their mangled fingers through which killed him. the gap. Using my spare arm I held the top of the window ledge Gradually, he began punching and pushed it down as hard as I the glass more aggressively as I could. I heard Jeremy let out a carefully starting stepping back. painful moan as the window ledge His left hand leaned against the crushed his frozen hand. window pane while his fingers began clawing the glass. Suddenly My mind was overwhelmed I felt something touch my back, and it wasn’t until I heard the using my right hand I lightly felt shattering of glass that I looked the surface only to realise it was back behind me only to notice just the wall. Pressing my back that Donavan was trying to climb against it, I calmly started to move through the window. I ran towards past it. Then, I felt something grip the other end of the house and my left arm, and I was too late to into my mother’s room at the realise that what I thought was a end of the hall. The lavender
The Blur Between Two Worlds By Rachael Dianne
incense filled the room, masking all other essences. I raced over to my mother’s closet, gently locking the doors behind me. Dragging my body to the right hand corner, I hid between her dresses listening to the sounds of glass breaking. Squeezing my legs tight to my chest, I wrapped my arms around my knees and buried my head in between them. I could hear the cruel screams of their moans echo through the walls. My heart started pounding as they moved towards my mother’s bedroom. A gentle creak disturbed the silence of the room as the door slowly opened. Dark shadows moved quietly into the lavender scented room as their revolting stench mixed unpleasantly with it. My breathing grew heavier as horror took control of my body. I could hear them sniffing the air, searching for me. Pushing my head out from beneath the clothes, my eyes were drawn to the only gap of moonlight in the room. I could see a shadow standing directly on the opposite side, gently rattling the door. Hiding back in amongst the clothes, the rattling became more aggressive as I blocked my ears and squeezed my eyes firmly and curled up into a little ball. Everything grew dark and silent. As minutes passed, I gently opened my eyes to realise the shadow at the door was gone and the stench of death had disappeared. I stayed in that closet for hours beyond their leaving; pondering as to why they left me untouched. Days later, I realised. The incense. They couldn’t smell me.
It is now the year of 2011. Some people die peacefully, but those who don’t, take their revenge upon the living because of it. These creatures are known as zombies. The curse began in the town of Greenberg, but when the weakness was discovered some people felt safe to leave the town, and so it spread. Now they come from anywhere, attacking every town not prepared. I am K. P Thompson, founder of the zombie weakness. On November 1st of each year, a horrific occasion occurs which I named, Halloween. Once a year, the boundary of the living and that of the dead become blurred and for 12 hours, the world is at war with itself. No one is safe.
HUNGAPPA FUNGAPPA
30
HUNGAPPA FUNGAPPA
31
TASTE Butter Cake
INGREDIENTS
METHOD
250g butter, softened
Step 1
1 cup caster sugar 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 3 eggs 2 cups (300g) self-raising flour
Before starting, make sure all ingredients – eggs, milk and butter – are at room temperature. Preheat oven to 180C. Grease and line the base of two 20cm round cake pans. Step 2
Butter icing, to decorate
Use an electric mixer to beat the butter, sugar and vanilla in a bowl until pale and creamy. Add the eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition.
Strawberry jam, to decorate
Step 3
White icing flours, to decorate
Add the flour and milk, alternating, in batches, until just combined. Divide mixture evenly among the prepared pans and use the back of a spoon or small palate knife to smooth the surface. Bake for 20-25 minutes or until a skewer inserted in the centres comes out clean.
1/2 cup milk
Step 4 Remove from oven and cool in pan for about five minutes before turning on to a wire rack to cool completely. Place one cake on a serving platter. Spread with icing and jam, if desired. Top with remaining cake and decorate with more icing and icing flowers.
33
Hey
ARE YOU LOOKING FOR G N I T N I R P T R E EXP L A N O I S S E F O R AND P GRAPHIC DESIGN N A T A S E C I V R E S ? E T A R E M O S AWE ! P L E H N A C T N I R CSU P WE CAN DESIGN AND PRINT • Logos and complete branding • Booklets • Brochures • Business Cards • Envelopes • Flyers • Annual Reports • Large Format • Letterheads
Get in touch
• Magnets • Notepads • Packaging • Posters • Promotional Cards • Stickers • Tent cards • With Compliments + Heaps more!
print@csu.edu.au Bathurst: 6338 4152 Wagga: 6933 2091