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HERALD Trainer seeks gym inclusivity

Annual flag field at Mepham

NMSD hosts helpful webinar

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NOVEMBER 26 - DECEMBER 2, 2020

VOl. 23 NO. 48

Volunteers give back and give thanks parishioners, John F. Kennedy High School students, and members of the local Kiwanis and Volunteers throughout Bell- Lions clubs. more and Merrick are giving Bellmore Kiwanis made a back this Thankslarge donation to giving. help Connect Last Saturday, Church feed particConnect Church of ipating families, Bellmore hosted its club President annual Families Andrew MeyerowFeeding Families itz said. “Any of the event. The Rev. families that we Jo h n G r ava g n a nor mally deal said that 140 famiwith, we direct to lies registered to [Gravagna] so they receive all the fixcan get Thanksgivings to prepare a ing meals,” he said. Thanksgiving “They’re doing a spread, which were ton of work and a provided in a driveton of good.” through distribuAlso doing good tion because of the are members of coronavirus panMerrick Kiwanis, demic. Donations who have org awere collected at nized food drives to JOhN GRAVAGNA food drives. collect donations “ I n a l o t o f Pastor, for the Bellmoreways, these fami- Connect Church Merrick Communilies depend upon ty Cupboard, the us going the extra Central High mile,” Gravagna said. “We make School District’s food pantry. sure not only to feed them but “Traditionally we have centered pray with them and ask for God’s on families with school-aged blessing upon their lives.” children,” Kiwanis President Gravagna estimated that 100 Martin Valk said, “but we felt volunteers pitched in during the distribution, including church Continued on page 3

By AlySSA SEIDMAN aseidman@liherald.com

Courtesy Coby Loew

JON AND COBy Loew craft furniture and other projects for fun and charity. Under the name Holywood Furniture, the duo have been donating furniture to families, businesses and houses of worship.

Furniture-making, a tradition for Merrick father and son By ANDREW GARCIA agarcia@liherald.com

Furniture building is more than a hobby for John F. Kennedy High School sophomore Coby Loew. It is a bond that he shares with his father, Jon, who learned the skill from his father. Together, Coby and John have constructed several pieces of furniture, including the desk and bed frame in Coby’s room, cutting, sanding and assembling them from scratch.

Now, the father and son are crafting furniture for others, free of charge. Under the name Holywood Furniture — spelled with only one l — the Loews are beautifying homes and places of worship with their custom-made pieces. Among the items are benches, a dining table and a bed frame, with the Loews funding all supplies and materials. “I just really like it — it’s a very peaceful activity for me,” said Coby, 15, of Merrick. “So, when the time came for my

bar mitzvah, I thought, ‘Maybe I’ll build something.’” When Coby turned 13, he crafted a bench and donated it to the Chabad Center for Jewish Life in Merrick, where it sits in the waiting room, along with a plaque. “Coby and Holywood Furniture built a magnificent bench for our center’s lobby, and it’s utilized all the time,” Rabbi Shimon Kramer said. “The workmanship is perfect, and the color is just right.” Continued on page 4

wish that everyone would be able to experience this kind of generosity at least once in their life — to be part of something bigger than themselves.

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MERRICK HERALD LIFE — November 26, 2020 Courtesy John Gravagna

Volunteers wore masks to stay safe during Connect Church’s Families Feeding Families event on Nov. 21.

Lions, Kiwanis step up during pandemic Continued from front page the need was so great that we had to go beyond that. “Nobody is immune [to] this virus — it’s striking every single group of our community,” Valk said, “and with people staying home looking for something to do, it’s the perfect time to volunteer to help your fellow man. Isn’t that what the holiday season is all about?” The local Lions clubs are also helping to ensure that needy residents are well fed on Thanksgiving. Camille Raia, president of Bellmore Lions, said that Wellington C. Mepham High School’s Leo Club helped her members pack 90 food baskets to support the Community Cupboard’s families. This year, Merrick Lions “did something that hadn’t been done before,” President Michelle Gagnon said. Members distributed fliers asking for donations to benefit the food pantries at Curé of Ars and Sacred Heart churches. Gagnon called the effort “very successful.” “Most people are very generous anyway, but this year it seemed like they were more compassionate,” she said. “Because so many people are listening to the news, they have a better understanding of how difficult it is, and how hunger is devastating. The pandemic is creating a huge hardship on almost everybody.” Although quarantining has prevented many people from feeling a sense of community, Gravagna said volunteering during the holidays could help restore that. “To be able to do something like this and put a smile on their faces . . . I wish that everyone would be able to experience this kind of generosity at least once in their life — to be part of something bigger than themselves,” he said.

student Volunteers from St. Pius Youth Group in Plainview, top, lent a hand during the event. Volunteer John dipierri, above left, loaded a trunk with groceries, helped by Nassau County Legislator Steve Rhoads and Nicole Angel assisted. ConneCt ChurCh members Meena Mohan, far left, and Angel helped the Rev. John Gravagna sort turkeys.

Holywood Furniture, a family tradition Continued from front page

November 26, 2020 — MERRICK HERALD LIFE

After that first project, Coby’s drive to build did not stop. He built his desk, some side tables and other pieces that can be found around the Loew house — even his bed frame was made by hand. “I think that’s the way used to be — we made our own houses, our own everything. Getting back to basics is a great way to ground yourself,” said Jon, an attorney. “He’ll have this bed in his family for 100 years. It’s a very simplistic way to show your appreciation for someone in a world that’s not simplistic.” With friends and neighbors suffering during the pandemic, the Loews said they wanted to do more to help. Friends who would visit and comment on the their custom furniture soon received versions of their own. They also helped a local business and other families who were struggling financially. “It’s a fantastic feeling . . . I know I’m capable of doing things that I’d say most people my age can’t do,” Coby said. “It’s a skill that will be with me my entire life, and it’s something that will gratify myself and others.” The Loews operate their nonprofit out of their home, and build roughly three pieces of furniture per year. Each project

takes from a few days to about two months to complete, depending on the size, before it’s delivered to the recipient. The latest donation went to Upper Room Ministries of Dix Hills, which received an L-shaped bench. The Loews had never met the pastor, the Rev. Regan D’Onofrio, yet they coordinated plans for a bench that would “bring people together,” Jon said. “It’s such a fun, unique experience, because it goes from the idea phase to shaking hands, then eventually everyone’s taking turns sitting on it,” Jon added. “It keeps me busy, but it feels good to help others, especially with what’s going on in today’s world,” Coby said. Holywood Furniture is now accepting project requests at www.holywoodfurniture.com, a website that Coby designed. Although the Loews have been busy renovating their kitchen by hand, they plan to get back to building furniture for others soon. “I know that if I’m ever in a situation where I need something, I can build it myself,” Coby said. “It’s a great feeling — and I can’t wait to do the same with my son someday.”

the loewS have built multiple benches, including one for the Chabad Center for Jewish Life in Merrick.

Photos courtesy Coby Loew

Several of the pieces of furniture in the Loew home were made by hand. Coby even built a custom-made computer desk for himself.

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Local trainer seeks to make gyms more inclusive aseidman@liherald.com

A fitness trainer from Bellmore is advocating to make gyms more inclusive for people of all abilities. Matthew Alexander, 19, is using his personal experiences to help the New York Fitness Coalition gain gyms essential status so they can remain open for clients — including those with physical and developmental disabilities — in the event of a second statewide shutdown. According to NYFC President Charlie Cassara, gyms are classified as recreational facilities in New York. In August, the coalition brought a class-action lawsuit against Gov. Andrew Cuomo to pressure the state to allow gyms to reopen. Cuomo later announced the facilities could reopen — with restrictions — on Sept. 2. But a new statewide restriction to curb the latest surge of Covid-19 infections nationwide requires gyms to close at 10 p.m. each night. “Closing at 10 o’clock only affects one percent of overall gyms — it’s nonsense,” Cassara said. “From 1.2 million check-ins at gyms in the state of New York . . . we have shown four Covid cases. I would love for [Cuomo] to prove where gyms have been super spreaders, because they haven’t been.” For Alexander, who’s on the autism spectrum, gyms provide a place to exercise and socialize with like-minded individuals, making them “essential” for people with disabilities, he said. “Going to the gym does not only contribute to physical health — it is necessary for mental health as well,” he said. “Studies show that people who are on the autism spectrum, have ADHD or anxiety need physical activity to be calm and collective. “The main reason why gyms should stay open is because exercise . . . provides the opportunity for social-

Courtesy Matthew Alexander

Bellmorite mAtthew AlexAnder is using his experiences as a fitness trainer to make gyms and fitness facilities more inclusive for people with disabilities. ization,” he continued. “Some people who are on the autism spectrum really struggle with socialization, and I used to be one of them. My entire life I had trouble socializing, [but] once I found the gym, I really felt like there was a place where I belonged.” Inclusion is a top priority at Charles DeFrancesco’s White Plains gym, Arena Fitness, which houses a facility dedicated to providing physical activity for children and adults of all abilities. DeFrancesco, Alexander’s col-

league, developed the “Fit 4 All” program for his son, Antonio, who is also on the autism spectrum. The owner said that if gyms are designated as essential businesses — and therefore, could stay open through shutdown periods — it would prevent people with disabilities from having to find another facility to accommodate them. “It’s difficult for some people on the spectrum to muster the energy to go to the gym,” DeFrancesco said. “Then you have some gyms that have permanently closed” as a result of the pandemic, “so the people going there now have to transition, which is the worst thing for [those] on the spectrum or with disabilities.” DeFrancesco is helping Cassara build universal gym licensing and accreditation guidelines for the Department of Labor and Department of Health to work towards standardizing the state’s fitness industry and gain gyms essential status. That includes bringing inclusivity to gym-goers of all abilities, Cassara said. “People need to understand” that people with disabilities are “different, not less,” DeFrancesco said. “Accommodations need to be set up for them ahead of time . . . so they immediately feel at home. The last thing they need to feel is singled out.” Alexander leads group fitness classes at Synergy Fitness in Merrick, Long Island Health and Racquet Club in Wantagh, Life Clubs in Lawrence and UFC Gym in New Hyde Park. As an instructor, he aims to make each session “as inclusive as possible,” a sentiment all trainers should be mindful of, he said. “There needs to be standards set from higher up that say how to teach people with autism,” he added, suggesting tools like noise-canceling headphones or incentivebased rewards programs. “The marketing needs to be more inclusive, welcoming people of all types of abilities — that’s the most important thing.”

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November 26, 2020 — MERRICK HERALD LIFE

Bringing local sports home every week

Herald sports Hofstra takes more aggressive approach By TONY BELLISSIMO tbellissimo@liherald.com

Last season was a difficult one for Hofstra’s women’s basketball program in terms of wins and losses, but there’s plenty of reasons for second-year head coach Danielle Santos Atkinson to be optimistic about the future. The Pride was unable to beat any of its Colonial Athletic Association rivals in 201920 and finished 3-27 overall while being outscored by an average of 15.6 points per game. Its victories came against Hartford, Morgan State and Campbell. “There were a lot of factors going into my first season and our eyes were set on a bigger picture,” said Santos Atkinson, a former Hofstra assistant who returned to campus last season to become the 12th head coach in program history. “We saw a lot of individual development and laid the foundation,” she added. “This season we’re looking to be much more aggressive at both ends of the floor. We want to play faster on offense and pressure the ball and generate more turnovers on defense.” The effort to close the gap on the rest of the CAA will be led by two full-time returning starters and one part-time returning starter, all of whom Atkinson is counting on to take their games to another level, along with a talented group of newcomers. Jaylen Hines started all 30 games in 201920 and led the team in scoring (11.6 ppg), rebounding (8.8 rpg) and steals while shooting nearly 50 percent from the floor (139-for281) to rank third in the conference. A 5-foot10 redshirt junior forward, she poured in a career-high 30 points against Charleston and is a “walking double-double,” Santos Atkinson said. “Jaylen is our most proven player and she’s returned with a lot more confidence,” Santos Atkinson said. “She worked on her game and her body big time during the quarantine. She has great touch around the rim and a positive demeanor that makes her a leader.” Sophomore Sorelle Ineza started all but two games last season at point guard and chipped in 8 points per game with a teamleading 32 minutes per game and 85 assists. From Quebec, Canada, Ineza was named to the CAA All-Rookie Team. “We put an awful lot on Sorelle’s shoulders last season,” Santos Atkinson said. “Being a freshman point guard is tough. Her game evolved over the season and now we’ll look to move her off the ball and give her more opportunities to shoot.” A couple of candidates to run the point are Rosi Nicholson, a junior coming off a strong season for Santa Fe Community College in Florida, and Jaysyni Knight, a junior transfer from the University of Pittsburgh who may not be eligible to play until next season pending a waiver decision on the NCAA’s transfer policy. Another former Pitt Panther, 6-foot-3 redshirt junior forward Jaala Henry, practiced with the Pride all of last season while sitting

out under the transfer rule. “She knows our system and is ready to contribute major minutes,” Santos Atkinson said. “She’s versatile with good shooting range and rebounding ability.” Hofstra’s third returnee with starting experience is junior guard JaKayla Brown, who averaged 6 points per game over 24 appearances, including a dozen starts. “JaKayla’s worked hard during the offseason and is an improved shooter who’ll help us at both ends.” Santos Atkinson believes the Pride will be a deeper squad than last season — and needs to be. “We want to play faster so we need fresh legs off the bench,” she noted. The Pride is scheduled to open the campaign with a non-conference game at Siena on Nov. 25. The CAA slate will once again include 18 games, but due to Covid-19 the format has been adjusted to limit travel and help ensure the health and safety of studentathletes, coaches and staff. In lieu of a traditional, home-and-home round robin schedule, teams will play against the same opponent at the same site on consecutive days, primarily weekends. “On paper, the conference is just as strong as last season,” Santos Atkinson said. “We’re focused on the little things and what’s going to make us competitive every single game.” The CAA regular season will tip off Friday, Jan. 1, and conclude on Sunday, Feb. 28. Games impacted by the pandemic could be made up at various alternate dates. Hofstra opens CAA action against William & Mary. As of now, fans are not expected to be permitted to attend games. “No fans is something we’ll have to get used to,” Santos Atkinson said. “When it’s game time, we just have to get locked in.”

JaYLEN HYNES LEd Hofstra in scoring and rebounding last season as a redshirt sophomore.

Photos courtesy Hofstra Athletic Communications

JuNIOr guard JaKaYLa Brown made a dozen starts for the Pride last season and averaged 6 points per game.

MERRICK HERALD LIFE — November 26, 2020

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November 26, 2020 — MERRICK HERALD LIFE

Applying to college amid the coronavirus pandemic tion process. “We are in a Covid world right now, nalcindor@liherald.com and students are concerned about if To help reduce Long Island high that is going to affect the list of schools school seniors’ worries while applying that they apply to, or if they need to to college amid the coronavirus pan- think about local schools, even though demic, Herald Inside LI hosted a webi- they might have been planning on going nar on Nov. 19 to guide them through a away for school, and they are also conprocess that is at once similar, but very cerned about how their families should plan financially for the decision-making different than in years past. Molloy College sponsored the hour- process,” DeMartini said. “SAT and ACT scores are ingrained in our psyche, long Zoom session. Because many entrance exams were so it’s shocking for many kids that we canceled during the pandemic, a num- no longer have to submit them. Howevber of students have not taken the SAT er, we encourage students to submit or ACT, and certainly have not taken SAT and ACT scores, and if they go test either or both of the tests more than optional, their college essays should be once, as many high school students had exceptional.” The panelists also agreed that the in the past between their junior to topics students choose for senior years. As a result, the their admission essays play webinar panelists said, a major role in their chances many colleges are making of acceptance to their such exams optional and desired schools. giving greater weight to “We are trying to steer extracurricular activities, kids away from choosing the number of Advanced Covid-19 or pandemic-relatPlacement classes a student ed stories for their college has taken and admissions essays. admissions essays because many people will write sto“At Molloy College, we ries like that,” Muzio said. have a holistic approach when evaluating students “However, if a student’s panfor entry into the college, so demic story demonstrates we always look at more than exceptional strength, then just the academic average we will encourage them to and the test scores that write about it.” appeared on the student’s The owner of Standout transcript and on their file College Prep, Bethany Goldand we dig a little deeper,” szer, said she has noticed a said Marguerite Lane, assisbig difference over the past t a n t v i c e p re s i d e n t fo r year in the college admisenrollment management at sions essays that students Molloy. “We understand that FrANk Muzio have submitted to colleges many high school students because of the stories stuWantagh were thrown into remote dents are telling about curlearning because of the pan- guidance director rent events in the world. demic, and that they might “Kids on Long Island not have the best academic have a habit of being spoiled test scores, so we look at the entire pic- and entitled, but the college admissions ture of a student to see if the student is essays have changed a lot to topics such a good fit for Molloy to help them devel- as sexuality, gender, race issues, Covidop in their academics and career.” 19-related stories and more,” said GoldFrank Muzio, the guidance director szer, who often serves as a liaison for the Wantagh School District, said between parents and high school counthe district has held Common App work- selors and parents and college admisshops with students and is encouraging sions officers. “I think in previous years them to apply both to local colleges and students would have been afraid to disthose farther away. cuss those topics, but now they talk “Students have adapted to this new about it. Kids are braver.” normal in different ways and at differ“I’ve noticed that students have put ent paces, and we want to make sure themselves out there more and have that all students have an application been more vulnerable in their college plan,” he said. “This past year, we really admissions essays — whether it’s about had to do a lot of individual counseling Covid-19 or about social justice,” Lane to meet students and families where agreed. they are and to meet a wide spectrum of Panelists also said they are encouragneeds.” ing students to fill out the Free ApplicaAnthony DeMartini, assistant princi- tion for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA). pal of school counseling and wellness at Finally, counselors are encouraging Calhoun High School in North Merrick, students to take a deep breath and relax. said counselors had to pivot last winter “We are trying to encourage kids to and spring because of the pandemic, enjoy school,” DeMartini said. “But, at using Zoom and Google Classroom to the same time, we want them to know keep in touch with students and meet that they can get through the college with parents about the college applica- application process.”

By Nicole AlciNdor

tudents have adapted to this new normal in different ways and at different paces, and we want to make sure that all students have an application plan.

VIEWFINDER By SUSAN GRIECO

THE QUESTION: How

do you cook a turkey?

You have to get something sharp to cut up the turkey. Put some salt on it, and then you put it on the stove for about 30 minutes. Or if you have a phone, you can Google it! MADELINE K. Kindergarten

Buy a turkey and cut it up. Put it in the oven, and cook it for 13 minutes with hot dogs. I love to eat the chicken part the best. LIAM B. Kindergarten

I think my dad has a baking soda box to put on it, but he never cooked a turkey before. I guess you put it in a pot or pan with cheese and M&Ms on it and then cook it. I don’t eat the bone part, just the chicken part. GIADDA I. Kindergarten

I think you put some kind of grease inside it to make it soft to chew. When it comes out, you decorate it with salad for its hair, bones for its legs and a carrot for its nose. Mackenzie U. 1st Grade

Buy a 10-pound turkey, season it with any type of spices, like pepper and hot sauce. Then put it in the oven for about 30 minutes. SEBASTIAN H. 1st Grade

Put the turkey in the oven for 30 minutes, bring it out, then eat it with a fork with corn, chicken, rice, meatballs and broccoli. When you’re done, put the plate in the sink, and then wash your hands. MARYN H. 1st Grade

MERRICK HERALD LIFE â€” November 26, 2020

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What’s neWs in and out of the classroom

November 26, 2020 — MERRICK HERALD LIFE

Herald ScHoolS

Photos courtesy Bellmore-Merrick Central High School District

StudentS and Staff members from Wellington C. Mepham High School installed the annual Flag Field of Honor on Nov. 3.

Mepham H.S. installs Flag Field of Honor The lawn of Wellington C. Mepham High School is adorned with nearly 200 American and military branch flags after students and staff volunteered to install a Flag Field of Honor on Nov. 3. In a fundraising effort led by social studies teachers Kerry Dennis and Chris Patten, students participating in the senior service-learning project sold flags to community members to benefit the district’s food pantry, the Bellmore-Merrick Community Cupboard. “In addition, the students have also been running a schoolwide fall challenge to benefit the Cupboard,” Dennis said. “The grades are competing against one another to bring in items needed. We are currently in the third week and have made two large donations to the cupboard so far.” Participants followed Covid-19 protocols during the outdoor event. “While we were putting up the flags, our students and staff wore masks and gloves the entire time while working, and we spread out stations for working,” Dennis added. Provided by the Bellmore-Merrick Central High School District; compiled by Alyssa Seidman.

Student Lana Jagat, above, carried a flag to place in the front lawn. the fLag fieLd of Honor stands on the Camp Avenue side of the high school, at right. Samantha Spencer, KeLLy Hennessy, Jenna Buehler, Rita McCarthy, Cassidy Perry, Brooke Corbo and Ali Heller affixed flags to their corresponding poles during the installation.

NMSD presents a night of virtual wellness

■ Teach children to use technology to communicate with friends and family in meaningful ways and to help others remotely;

■ Monitor children’s texting and gaming, and assist them with proper technology etiquette; and ■ Mentor good time-management skills so that children learn people run the devices, not the other way around. Feurer is a child psychiatrist at Cohen’s Children’s Medical Center. She focused her presentation on helping parents identify and relieve anxiety in children, particularly during a pandemic. She explained that anxiety in children is common and normal, but when it becomes overwhelming, it is crucial to intervene so it does not become a lifelong challenge. Feurer also detailed distress tolerance skills (TIPP) as well as breathing exercises, such as box breathing, to diffuse severe anxiety or panic. Her suggestions for parents include: ■ Spend one-on-one time with each child with your undivided attention in an activity they enjoy; ■ Stay calm, use praise, and provide positive reinforcement; ■ Create structures and routines and involve the children with scheduling; ■ Be aware of physical symptoms, such as headaches, which are often a manifestation of anxiety;

Courtesy North Merrick School District

Dr. Devorah heitner provided North Merrick families with some tips on digital safety, and empowered parents to be mentors and role models for their children. ■ Set a specific time for worrying and differentiate between real-problem worrying and hypothetical worrying; and ■ Get artsy by crafting a mindfulness glitter jar, coloring or painting, and make time to move with exercise, dance or yoga. Parent University concluded the evening with a soothing sequence of yoga

poses guided by Paras. At the end of the session, she asked families to bring their hands to heart center, stating, “May you be happy, may you be healthy, may you be peaceful. Namaste.” Provided by the North Merrick School District; compiled by Alyssa Seidman.

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■ Spend quality time together as a family while also finding time for self-care and being alone;

■ Take breaks from technology and be creative through cooking or writing;

MERRICK HERALD LIFE — November 26, 2020

North Merrick School District held its fall session of Parent University remotely on Nov. 16. The “Night of Virtual Wellness” was coordinated by teachers Maria Castle and Lisa Drewes, and included presentations from Dr. Devorah Heitner and Dr. Vera Feurer, and a family yoga session led by North Merrick teacher Christine Paras. Heitner is the founder and director of Raising Digital Natives and author of “Screenwise: Helping Kids Thrive in their Digital World.” She discussed the new reality of children spending so much time online during the pandemic, both for schoolwork and socially. She said parents can help their children learn empathy, responsibility and confidence as digital citizens by using technology to connect, create and learn. Some of her suggestions for parents are: ■ Be aware that even young children pick up on the news cycle, so give simple and age-appropriate updates as well as an understanding that information is evolving;

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maSSapequa Teacher, chaTTerTon elemenTary School

leViTToWn VolunTeer, eaST meadoW Fire deparTmenT eaST meadoW

hen the pandemic first started, we kind of didn’t believe it when we left on that Friday. We thought, if anything, we would have had to close school for a couple of days and then we’d be right back. For that period of time to stretch out more and more, it was crazy. I’m a parent also, so I was on the other end too — what was their school district doing? Are we all doing the same thing, and what does that look like? It was definitely a big surprise; no one knew what to expect when we went home on that Friday. Our district started a small team of teachers from all three buildings to come up with ‘what ifs.’ I’ve been teaching in Chatterton for 20 years, but at that time, I was working as the computer technology teacher. Being the technology person, I had a very different role, because as everything shifted to virtual, it became more about the best programs to use, how to get everyone up and running, and how to keep in contact with kids and teachers at home. Over the summer, we ran a number of committees. We had people talking about what a virtual or hybrid schedule would look like and what safety measures we needed to be in school. I actually went back into my classroom for third grade, which is where I started my career here, so I have now brought those technology skills and knowledge into this current group of kids. It’s very different. There’s a lot more time spent in the classroom. We sort of stay within your class — for lack of a better word, your family here.

’ve been doing it for 50 years. It’s not easy, but what makes it rewarding is working with my fellow firefighters in the department. I continue to do it because I love doing it. I joined as soon as I turned 18. I remember the exact day — Nov. 16, 1970. It’s amazing. It’s hard to believe myself. When you’re a firefighter, you never know what you’re going to get or when you’re going to get it. We respond to a wide range of calls, from physical injuries to car accidents to trouble breathing, which could be Covid-related. It’s the unknown that makes you have to take precautions. When I train our young firefighters, I teach them to think like our older firefighters. That means keep yourself safe, being knowledgeable and watching out for warning signs. You try to prepare for as many things as possible. Anybody in the back of the ambulance is in full [personal protective equipment], and when the call is completed, we clean out the entire thing and get it ready for the next one. We go a step further when it comes to taking safety precautions. I think my department is one of the ones most on top of it. You have gowns, masks, eye shields, full face shields, booties — everything and anything to cover up your exposed skin. If a patient needs oxygen, we put a mask over the oxygen mask too. You treat everyone as if they have it, and you can’t go wrong.

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November 26, 2020 — MERRICK HERALD LIFE

PasToR, ConneCT ChuRCh BellmoRe

his year we’re doing a drive-through food donation. We have volunteers from the Kiwanis Club, Lions Club, Kennedy High School, the parish and church itself, Stop & Shop, Stew Leonard’s, [Nassau County Legislator] Steve Rhoads and community members. We are estimating about 100 volunteers. We make sure not only to feed them but also pray with them. People have been affected so much, so you are not just giving to a food bank, but can encounter and experience and love with the families live and in person. The little things do mean a lot. We take the little things for granted every day. But that is what we value the most, and the families see it as a tremendous blessing. In a lot of ways, these families depend upon us going the extra mile. Every year we give more. If the cupboards are low, you name it, and we’re putting it in there and we want to give in abundance. We are always at the ready. I wish that everyone would be able to experience this kind of generosity at least once in their life and be a part of something bigger than themselves.

WanTaGh Chef-oWneR, liTTle KiTChen WanTaGh

ast year, we had a customer that would come in for lunch often, and one day she asked us if we would help her collect donations for Long Island Cares, who she worked with. Last year, we collected about 80 Thanksgiving dinners for families. I think reaching the 125 number, in terms of meals collected, would be a good number that we could reach for, but I think it’s realistic. I think it’s just something small we can do to help. At the end of the day, we’re just a drop-off location trying to collect some food for families who need it, that’s all. This year, there are a lot of families that are really being affected by the coronavirus. But, at the same time, I think people now are willing to give more, if they can. If we could surpass what we did last year, I think that is a win. This community is the most helpful and supportive community I’ve ever been a part of. I’ve got boxes here that still have to be brought over to Long Island Cares and other places. Just trying to help.

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November 26, 2020 — MERRICK HERALD LIFE

OBITUARY

Jfreda@liherald.com

Last week, the Herald reported the death of friend and colleague Timothy John Denton on Nov. 14, at age 67, in Manhasset. Co-workers from Herald Community Newspapers and Richner Communications offered words of remembrance of their friend Tim. Many noted his wisdom and quick wit. But Denton, a California transplant, was known among those closest to him as an animated, keenly talented and highly spiritual man. He was born on July 9, 1953, in Los Angeles, the third of Earl and Vita Denton’s four children. He and his brothers, William and Ross, and their sister, Laurel, spent their formative years in Whittier, 20 miles southeast of Los Angeles. In 1958, when Tim was 5, according to Laurel, the family moved to Arroyo Grande, a small town in central California. Earl Denton was a school district superintendent, born Timothy and raised in Los Angeles and a “city guy,” Laurel said. Vita was an English teacher. Their parents’ backgrounds in academia spurred her brother’s interest in learning, she said. “He was a reader from the time he’d just learned how,” Laurel recalled. “He started reading before anyone else, and he quickly began reading a lot of books — and talking about music.” Coupled with Denton’s early craving for knowledge was an insatiable appetite for music — listening to, discussing and eventually learning how to play it. “He was attracted to classical music, even as a child,” Laurel said. “That was the music that we had in the house, yes, but he was attracted to it on his own.” By the time he attended Ar royo Grande High School, she said, he had become a dedicated musician, as well as an unofficial follower of the hippie movement, which was at its height in California as Tim grew up. “He had long hair and wore his sandals to school,” his sister recounted. “These things were frowned upon at the time. Our father was very strait-laced, so you could say there was a rebellious side to Tim.” Throughout high school, Denton honed his musical talents, playing violin — his first instrumental love, followed later by the cello and the piano — in the school orchestra, and attending summer music camps. He also sang in the school choir. Laurel said that his emotional connection to music was a microcosm of his life. “He experienced the highest of highs and lowest of lows in music,” she said. “He would get extremely ecstatic to extremely frustrated quickly.” After he graduated from high school, Tim studied music at Whittier College, near his early childhood home. There Laurel remembers him living in a house just off campus with 10 other musicians. She recalls visiting frequently for cotillions

and celebrations, and Tim mingling enthusiastically with fellow lovers of music and culture. After college, he became a studio musician in Los Angeles and a member of the Roger Wagner Master Chorale. Then, in the late 1970s, he had an opportunity to travel to Vienna to study music. “He was so excited,” Laurel said. Tim remained in Vienna for roughly six years, she said, joining an ensemble, studying conducting and expanding his cultural interests. When he returned to the U.S., he settled in New York City. At that point, a friend had persuaded him to become an English teacher for non-English speakers. But, his sister said, “He was a writer, more so,” she said. As the turn of the century neared, Denton was offered a job as a reporteer at Standard & Poor’s. Finance and its political repercussions were also areas that interested him. But around the same time, he renewed his interest in spiritual development. He had grown up in the Episcopal church, Denton and as a boy was tasked with doing a comparative study of other religions to prepare for his confirmation. As an adult in New York in the mid1990s, he became a Buddhist. “When I met Tim, he was in the process of diving deeper into his study of Buddhism,” said Susan Salem, a longtime close friend. He eventually became a Buddhist priest — while working as a financial reporter in Downtown Manhattan during the business day. Salem said he gradually became more focused on his spirituality, and after working at Standard & Poor’s, he moved to Long Island and got involved in the Holy Trinity Orthodox Church in East Meadow. “He was always trying to learn more, and he wanted so desperately to share his spiritual gifts, both in Buddhism and in the Orthodox Church,” Salem said. And music remained important to him. He joined the church’s choir, which played an integral role in its prayer services. He even contributed to a recorded holiday album by the choir, according to Salem. As his faith and spirituality grew, so too did his relationship with Salem’s son, Jesse, who became his godson. The pair spent a lot of time together, going to carnivals, car dealerships, movies, bowling alleys, the mall. They formed a close bond, and Tim often spoke about his love for Jesse. “Tim became a like a second father to me, especially this past year,” said Jesse, who’s now 18. “All throughout my life, I really began to realize how much he treated me like his own.” Tim never had children of his own, but Jesse said he felt as if Tim considered him one. Denton is also survived by four nieces, Sarah Denton, Julie Fiumara, Wendy Heard and Elizabeth Denton, and a nephew, Andy Denton. In 2017, the Herald Community Newspapers hired Denton as an assistant editor, and he was promoted just weeks later. At

MERRICK HERALD LIFE — November 26, 2020

By J.D. FREDA

The life of Tim Denton

Photos courtesy Laurel Denton

ThE DEnTon chilDREn and their father. Above from left, Ross, Earl, Laurel, Tim and William.

DEnTon in his 30s at the piano. Before he was a journalist, he was an avid musician. the time of his death, he was the senior editor of the Wantagh and Seaford HeraldCitizens, and oversaw production of the Herald’s east zone, which includes the Bell-

more and Merrick Herald Lifes. His indepth reporting and sharp intellect made him a highly respected local journalist.

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EMPLOYMENT Help Wanted $18.50 NYC, $16 L.I. & up to $13.50 Upstate NY! If you need care from your relative, friend or neighbor and you have Medicaid, they may be eligible to start taking care of you as a personal assistant under NYS Medicaid CDPA Program. No Certificates needed. Phone: 347-713-3553 ACCOUNTANT: P/T for N. Bellmore CPA now through May, 2021 to work from home. Needs Q. Books & UltraTax exp. for eventual partial takeover of practice. N. Bellmore N. Merrick residents preferred. email: xmailit99@gmail.com or leave message (landline) 516-781-3709. ACCOUNTS PAYABLE, FLEXIBLE work schedule 3-4 days a week. Great position for parent with kids in school or other responsibilities. Must have excel skills, phone manners, and good financial sense. Contact Corey Carr CoreyCarrNY@gmail.com with resume/questions CLERICAL PART-TIME: 9AM-1PM More Hours May Follow as Needed. This is a (2) Person Office. Will Be Involved w/Insurance Claims and Heavy Assistance w/Construction Related Paperwork. Must have Excellent Computer skills, Be Able to Maintain Social Networking Updates, Create New Computer Forms When Needed, Type, Handle Telephones, Schedule Appointments, Billing, Answer Emails, Customer Service 516-792-0437 ELEMENTARY TEACHERS: Certified For Five Towns Yeshiva. After noon Hours. Competitive Pay. Send Resume To: atmdayw@yahoo.com

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to join our outside sales team, contact Rhonda glickman. send your resume today. rglickman@liherald.com, 516-569-4000 x250.

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November 26, 2020 — MERRICK HERALD LIFE

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Q. As a contractor who Ask The reads your column, I don’t always agree with you, but Architect generally I find things interesting, especially knowing other people are going through the same things as me. I have a strange situation I wanted your opinion about and also wanted readers to know about, since it has never happened before, to me, anyway. I have a really nice prospective job to do onte eeper that will keep me and my employees busy through the winter. It’s a complete interior renovation in an upscale, very large apartment. The problem is, I was just told there would be another contractor on the job. Weird, huh? After months of interviews and checking my references, I was told the owner would kind of “bid” items out as we go along, like if my number was too high for finish work in the master bathroom, they would take the other guy, or if they needed me to only do the flooring that week, even though I was supposed to do everything, they would give me a “day or two notice.” Have you ever heard of anything like that? How can I make a living this way? What do you think?

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A. Not only is it strange, it’s a great way to lose your business. I wouldn’t even consider such an arrangement. I have experienced similar setups, and I do mean “setup,” when an owner wants a building design, but after many design meetings, walls and spaces finally arranged, structure determined with room for ductwork, plumbing and electrical, the owner hands the job to a mystery interior designer who moves wall locations, violates code, ignores ductwork and plumbing locations — basically wrecking the building’s ability to work as a “system” in favor of random-ordered walls. When the owner does this, it sets us up for failure. It’s possible that owners don’t understand the consequences of their narrowed thinking. Your dilemma is financial and logistical, and worst of all, you’re being set up to fail at your job, one for which you could end up being blamed for work you didn’t even do. There’s the liability problem with whose workmanship caused damages, whose employee may get hurt because of cross-over work that created a dangerous condition, and whose insurance will be used to cover the scope of the job. The owner, it seems, wants to be the contractor, treating two competing companies as subcontractors. Maybe the owner has figured out a way to save money on every item while watching workers scrounge for morsels of tasks to try to make payroll that week. This is a bait-and-switch operation where you believe you’ll be doing the work, as a professional, setting up the dates to deploy which employee or subcontractor, arranging for tools and delivered materials, only to get a call the day before informing you that the parallel party will be stepping in. You may regret being set up. Good luck!

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MERRICK HERALD LIFE — November 26, 2020

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MERRICK HERALD LIFE — November 26, 2020

HERALD

20 Merrick

Herald editorial

Merrick

November 26, 2020 — MERRICK HERALD LIFE

HERALD HERALD and Merrick Herald News Established 1994

Giving thanks in 2020

Incorporating Merrick Beacon 1950-2020

AlyssA seidmAn Editor Andrew GArciA Reporter Audrey cohen robert cumminGs Advertising Account Executives office 2 Endo Boulevard Garden City, NY 11530 Phone: (516) 569-4000 Fax: (516) 569-4942 Web: www.liherald.com E-mail: merrickeditor@liherald.com Copyright © 2020 Richner Communications, Inc.

HERALD COMMUNITY NEWSPAPERS Robert Richner Edith Richner Publishers, 1964-1987 ■ clifford richner stuArt richner Publishers michAel boloGnA Vice President - Operations ■ scott brinton Executive Edtitor Jim hArmon

Copy Editor christinA dAly Photo Editor tony bellissimo Sports Editor KAren bloom Calendar Editor ■ rhondA GlicKmAn Vice President - Sales ellen reynolds Classified Manager lori berGer Digital Sales Manager ■

Jeffrey neGrin Creative Director crAiG white Production Coordinator crAiG cArdone Art Director ■ diAnne rAmdAss Circulation Director ■

herAld community newsPAPers Baldwin Herald Bellmore Herald Life East Meadow Herald Franklin Square/Elmont Herald Freeport Leader Long Beach Herald Lynbrook/East Rockaway Herald Malverne/West Hempstead Herald Merrick Herald Life Nassau Herald Oceanside/Island Park Herald Oyster Bay Herald Guardian Rockaway Journal Rockville Centre Herald South Shore Record Valley Stream Herald Wantagh Herald Citizen Seaford Herald Citizen

member: Local Media Association New York Press Association Chamber of Commerce of the Merricks

Published by richner communications, inc. 2 Endo Blvd. Garden City, NY 11530 (516) 569-4000

n a year when so much has gone awry — so many lives lost, businesses battered, jobs vanished — it strains the imagination to think what we might be thankful for, particularly as the nation enters its second wave of the coronavirus pandemic. The coming months will likely be, as President-elect Joseph Biden has said, a “dark winter.” Thanksgiving is, however, all about the audacious nature of hope. The holiday, first celebrated in the fall of 1621, commemorates the struggle that the original Pilgrims faced and, against all odds, overcame in the New World — and the kinship they felt with the Native Americans who rescued them, helping to provide sustenance to a relatively small band of people who otherwise might have starved. The roughly 50 colonists at the original harvest celebration in Plymouth, Mass., were outnumbered by Native Americans two to one, according to History.com. The 100 Pilgrims who arrived on the Mayflower had seen much death between 1620 and 1621: Some 78 percent of the women died during the first winter. Yet they persevered, and survived. So shall the American people today — thanks in no small measure to our heroes

— the doctors, nurses, EMTS, firefighters, police officers, teachers, teachers’ aides, sanitation workers, railroad workers, subway and bus drivers, custodians, cooks, waiters and waitresses, supermarket employees and so many others — who have kept us safe, our education system up and running, and our economy moving. When many others were able to work from home, they put their lives on the line to do their jobs. As a society, we should take a moment and reflect on their sacrifices over the past nine months. We can also be thankful for our family and friends. We may not be able to shower them with hugs and kisses as we might want, but we can keep them in our thoughts and close to our hearts. And we can be thankful for the miracles of modern science. Only 100 years ago, the 1918 pandemic ran wild for two years, killing 50 million worldwide, including 675,000 in the United States, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Thanks to technology that allows many of us to work remotely and socially distance, to date we have seen a tenth of the 500 million cases that the world did in

1918-19, and because of modern medical technology, the death toll thus far is onefiftieth what it was then. So, while the number of infections and deaths today is unacceptably high, it is not close to the level of suffering experienced a hundred years ago — and let us hope and pray that it remains that way. Likely, it will. On Saturday, the innovative New York company Regeneron Pharmaceuticals received emergency-use authorization for its experimental antibody treatment for the coronavirus. President Trump received the treatment, and by all accounts it was highly effective. The drug is designed to prevent patients from becoming severely ill by imitating the body’s natural defense system. We can only say, wow! If all goes well, the Regeneron treatment should prevent many deaths, enabling health officials to safely roll out at least one of the vaccines now in the pipeline without undue political pressure. By April, we could indeed round the corner on this terrible pandemic, says Dr. Anthony Fauci, director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases. Yes, there has been much despair this year, but there is much hope as well.

County does right by small businesses

e are pleased that Nassau County Executive Laura Curran is once again promoting small businesses ahead of the holiday season — which is vital this pandemic year. Last Friday, Curran and county Industrial Development Agency Chairman Richard Kessel came to Rockville Centre to promote an innovative contest, aptly titled the Shop Safe, Shop Local Scavenger Hunt, and we are encouraging readers to take part in it. The contest, which will be held for one week starting Saturday, will work like this: Complete four of eight tasks in your community, like buying breakfast at a local eat-

ery or making a purchase at a local shop, and take a photo of yourself — masked — at each location, along with the product you purchased and your receipt. Then email it to scavengerhunt@nassaucountyny.gov or share it on Facebook. The first person who finishes all four tasks and registers them on each day of the contest will receive a $100 gift card. All purchases must be made at small businesses in a single community on the day of the contest. Online and delivery orders are eligible. The complete set of

letters More praise for doctor’s column To the Editor: As Bob Praver did in last week’s letters, I also applaud Dr. Eric Last’s column, “Surely we shouldn’t be fighting over wearing masks” (Nov. 12-18), on the urgency of wearing masks in fighting the coronavirus

pandemic. But while Last’s exhortation that we must “treat others as you’d want to be treated yourself ” was well-intentioned, I believe it would fall on deaf ears when directed not only at those who, at this late date, scoff at the wearing of masks and social distancing, but also those who deliberately promote and take part in large, illegal social gatherings with no consideration of taking measures to counter the spread

instructions can be found at www.nassaucountygov/shoplocal. As we noted in last week’s editorial, “Remember to shop locally this holiday season”: “Despite the crisis, we encourage you to consider patronizing our mom-and-pop shops, many of which now offer their goods online. Abandoning our local businesses would be devastating on so many levels.”

opinions

he coronavirus pandemic has created a variety of hardships that have left families and children in distress. Social isolation. A mounting death toll. An estimated 8 million Americans falling into poverty. We have entered uncharted territory, and uncertainty continues as cases continue to rise across the U.S. Grief is a normal reaction — grieving not just the loss of life, but also the loss of normalcy and freedom when a disaster occurs. So what happens when we add even more stress to families sharon and their children, skariah particularly when schools close? The trickledown effect of all this misfortune can dramatically weigh on kids, especially if they don’t have access to mental health resources at home. Typically, mental health symptoms are identified at school, by their teachers and peers, social workers and guidance counselors. Children need a routine and consistency. Remote learning and social isolation will continue to uproot them. Children

with autism also face challenges with irritability, anxiety and behavioral disturbances. And the erratic nature of schools’ opening and closing (albeit temporarily) can have a lasting effect. A recent study in JAMA Pediatrics showed that more than 22 percent of students in the Hubei province of China reported symptoms of depression, and more than 18 percent had anxiety symptoms, when schools closed for over a month. A second study, in the Journal of Pediatrics, determined that younger children (ages 3 to 6) were more inclined to show fear or clinginess, where older kids (6 to 18) were more likely to show inattention and persistent inquiry. Clinging, inattention and irritability were the severe psychological conditions demonstrated by children in all age groups. School closures — short or long — are unfortunately bound to happen until a safe and effective vaccine is available. Prepare to take care of your child now. First, children need outlets. In early childhood, play is important for development in the physical, verbal and emotional domains. Build that imaginary fort,

he trickledown effect of all this misfortune can dramatically weigh on kids.

LeTTers of the virus. The time for these selfish and greedy individuals to be reasoned with has long passed. These people should be penalized for their actions, which continue to put the rest of us at even greater risk of acquiring the disease, and severe penalties should also be meted out to participants in these gatherings, not just their greed-bound organizers. If anything, these miscreants should consider the 17th-century English poet John Donne’s poem, telling us not to ask “for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee.” They might also be reminded that, indeed, “no man is an island,” as Donne wrote. It appears, though, that they do not realize or accept this concept, even though we are all in this fight — together. ROBERT RUBALSkY East Rockaway

We must protect communities of color To the Editor: The Washington Post last Friday published a new analysis of the impact of Covid-19 on people of color. It reported, “Nearly nine months after the virus exploded in

encourage storytelling, toast s’mores in your backyard. For adolescents, it’s important that they develop their own sense of identity but also explore peer relationships. Encourage this — in a socially distanced, safe way. Second, seek normalcy. The goal is to foster continued development, even if your children can’t attend school in person. They want to feel safe — an important tool for parents to use during the crisis. Make sure you provide protection and consistency in an otherwise uncertain time. Talk to them about their feelings. Ensure their safety by creating an atmosphere of stability. Third, adapt to the environment. Summer may be gone, but you can still enjoy the outdoors safely during the fall, and even on some nice winter days. When the extreme cold sets in, continue building on the elements of safety and fun you have already introduced. Have family game nights. Schedule a movie night. Cook and bake together as a family. Designate a reading hour. Although it may be colder, it’s important to get exercise, so go for a walk or a hike or a brisk bike ride. There are also online exercises for kids, like yoga and others.

Fourth — and most important — pay attention. Younger children can’t always express their distress, anxiety or fear. Their behavior may regress. Look for the signs, which include an increase in crying or neediness, more temper tantrums or somatic symptoms (headaches, stomach aches) than normal. Older children may also show increased anger and irritability. If you think your children or adolescents may need a mental health professional, don’t hesitate. They are acting that way because they need help. So watch out for them to verbalize any suicidal thoughts, ongoing sleep disturbances, a decline in overall functioning (hygiene, grooming), aggression or worsening substance use. If you see these signs, seek treatment. Following these steps may help keep children mentally fit during one of our harshest times. Nothing can replace life as we knew it pre-Covid, but you can manage this new normal and keep your kids safe, too. Sharon Skariah, M.D., is the director of child and adolescent psychiatry for Zucker Hillside Hospital. She is also an assistant professor at the Donald and Barbara Zucker School of Medicine at Hofstra/ Northwell.

Framework Courtesy Roni M. Chastain

the United States, and amid big treatment strides, the disease continues to ravage African-American and other minority communities with a particular vengeance. Black, Asian, Native American and Hispanic patients still die far more frequently than white patients, even as death rates have plummeted for all races and age groups.” As Covid-19 continues to spread aggressively nationwide, it is crucial that government officials at all levels — federal, state and local — address the disproportionate impact of the pandemic on people of color. Immediate attention should be paid to issues such as the availability of testing facilities in communities of color, access to health care, inequitable treatment once access is provided and priorities for providing vaccines once they are available. The evidence is clear: Government owes it to all Americans to ensure fair and equal access to health care, regardless of race, in this pandemic — and always. ELAINE GROSS President, ERASE Racism

The season’s last splashes of color — Glen Cove

MERRICK HERALD LIFE — November 26, 2020

We need to pay attention to children’s mental health G

November 26, 2020 — MERRICK HERALD LIFE

opinions

Give thanks the election is over, and put the knives away

esides the sad deaths of a quartermillion Americans, the pandemic claimed another victim this month: the re-election of President Trump. Had the election been held in February, Trump would have won against any Democrat. Unemployment was historically low, there were more jobs than job seekers, incomes were up, 401(k)s were high, manufacturing was robust, deregulation liberated small business, he engineered a more assertive U.S. trade policy, no new wars were waged, hostilities were being JoHn abroad, o’ConneLL reduced Middle East peace deals were coming and consumer spending was strong. Trump’s February re-election wouldn’t have been unanimous. Millions who prioritize the environment and climate change would have voted for a Democrat. People who disagreed with Trump’s right-to-life stand would have opposed him. Citizens who find him repulsive wouldn’t have voted for him. His obnoxious narcissism didn’t help, though Gov. Andrew Cuomo’s and former President Barack Obama’s obvious vanity is overlooked by a worshipful media.

But the ante-pandemic Trump would have won. Even in November he garnered 4 million more votes than Obama did in 2008, 8 million more than Obama did in 2012, 8 million more than Hillary Clinton in 2016. Trump 2020 even beat Trump 2016 by nearly 11 million votes. Yet still, to the cheers of nearly 80 million Biden voters, Trump is likely to have lost his re-election bid after his legal challenges conclude. The virus exposed his myopic focus on the economy and jobs and his minimizing of other critical concerns. Trump all along has preached a gospel of nationalistic capitalism. John F. Kennedy’s brilliant speechwriter, Ted Sorenson, once used the now famous aphorism, “A rising tide lifts all boats,” in a presidential address. Trump not only believed in that theory, he achieved such an uplifted economy. Unemployment was at 3.5 percent in February, the lowest since 1969. Americans were working, getting paid more, saving more, spending more. The increased demand encouraged more trade under better trade deals, such as the U.S.-Mexico-Canada Agreement. Retirement savings plans were doing well, helping limited-income seniors feel more secure about paying their bills. Most people were living better. A pre-election poll —

that received little press attention — revealed that most people felt they were better off than they were four years ago. Then the pandemic struck. Dr. Anthony Fauci, the director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, told the president and the nation in January that Covid-19 wasn’t a major threat. That’s all the rationale the country’s CEO needed to continue prioritizing economic growth. He knew that a pandemic had the potential to reverse all of his economic accomplishments and cut America’s flourishing growth off at the knees. While he took actions, like stopping incoming travel from China, ordering vaccine research and eventual distribution to commence at warp speed, sending hospital ships to California and New York, and ramping up ventilator production, he eschewed leading a national, coordinated effort. Nor did he inspire an America-wide “Let’s fight together” effort of mutual protection. This lack of a federal-level, all-out war on the virus gave voters the impression that Trump saw the pandemic as an annoying distraction, eclipsing the sun from shining on his accomplishments. The virus wasn’t a problem he could build, deal or fire his way out of. He ran for president to be the manager in chief, and he was good at it, but when the pandemic came,

ut just imagine if the vote had taken place in February, before the pandemic.

we needed an empathizer and inspirer, a credible leader who could take — and eloquently explain — tough actions, and he wasn’t that. Covid-19 delivered the fatal wound. And when Trump caught the virus at the height of the campaign — probably by setting a poor example by not wearing a mask and ignoring social distancing — the spotlight narrowed onto his failure to lead, and all his achievements went dark. He had fended off many cuts before. Long knives had been out even before Inauguration Day 2017: An indisputably far-left press in cahoots with social media moguls to censor MAGA speech; an infuriatingly condescending socialist elite; millionaire athletes and other entertainers; anarchists, arsonists and rioters disturbing the domestic tranquility and opposition-party conspiracies each drew blood. With little help, he prevailed against them all. President-elect Joseph Biden’s supporters can celebrate their victory this Thanksgiving weekend. Trump’s fans should also be thankful, because the national pride they’ve relished for the last four years will prevail. Trump ignited it, but it was ours before him and will be ours after him. Reasonable patriots on both political sides make America great. We can all be thankful for that. John O’Connell is a former executive editor of the Herald Community Newspapers. Comments about this column? OConnell11001@yahoo.com.

It wasn’t easy: How I got to see my grandkids

he following is not a how-to for anyone else. It’s just my story. We all have to maneuver our way through the grinding deprivations of the coronavirus as best we can. We hadn’t seen the kids or grandkids for nine months, since we were lucky enough to gather for an anniversary holiday in the Dominican Republic last February. Before we left for the D.R., we were worried about the mysterious and random deaths of Randi tourists on the kReiss island over the year before. We didn’t realize that the far more deadly Covid-19 was already lying in wait there, and gaining ground in the U.S. We went, and everyone came home healthy, but toward the end of our stay we started hearing news about this novel coronavirus thing. Having survived the D.R., we fully expected to go back to our lives and begin planning the next time we could see our children and grandchildren. We were on that imaginary road we all have in our

heads that rolls along into the future until we hit a wall. Suddenly all of us got knocked sideways by Covid-19, and we began making adjustments and accepting life compromises we never could have imagined. Over the summer, we didn’t visit our kids out West as we always do. We didn’t visit the Florida kids, either, because Florida seems to be ground zero for foolishness when it comes to the virus. We felt increasingly shocked and depressed by the stories of people toiling at risky jobs because they couldn’t afford to stay home, at the same time caring for sick relatives and watching loved ones die. If you have a heart and a conscience, they keep hammering you to do something when there really was nothing to do except try to stay healthy and safe. We stayed in touch with the family as the kids’ schools closed down, and they appeared increasingly detached and sleepy and bored when we connected on Zoom or Facetime. We leaned in and asked questions and they answered, and their slightly distant politeness seemed to exacerbate the pain of separation and real communica-

tion. A few weeks ago, my daughter in California said she wanted to visit and bring the kids. She really wanted to visit; I think she was worried that we might not be around forever. I suppose we’re all feeling our mortality. And she was worried that Covid was getting worse and flying might become impossible. As I wrote last week, we all decided that Thanksgiving was out of the question because of all the people who would be traveling over the holiday despite the warnings. We wanted to maximize safety. My daughter flew three weeks ago. Two flights to get here: empty planes. Everyone in the airports and on board was masked. When they got here, they stayed in a rental rather than with us, and we lent them a car so we wouldn’t drive anyplace together. They ate meals in their own place, although that’s usually our best family activity. It didn’t feel good at all to pay for a rental when I have plenty of room for them. It felt worse to wear masks when we were together, to keep six feet of social distance, and not hug. After a nine-month separation, we didn’t hug the people we love most in the

e invented the interlockingelbow hug and the expressiveeyes love beam.

world. The Florida kids came for 24 hours and stayed at a nearby hotel, just so the cousins could see one another before another year goes by. We were together outside whenever possible, and when the weather was uncooperative we sat inside, apart, near open doors and windows. The kids spent a big part of each day going to school online at their rental space. We invented the interlocking-elbow hug and the expressive-eyes love beam, and we went to parks when we could and walked around, taking in the fresh air and one another. I never noticed on Facetime how much they have grown this year, and how they carry themselves differently, and how one has become a bit more diffident as another displays a new boldness in the world. We did it as best we could. I would say we never forgot the danger lurking among us. Our regimen was disciplined but not perfect. They flew back home a few days ago, having obtained proof of life and proof of love all around. It was a visit unlike any others: We all knew we were seizing a moment with no promise of when we could meet again. Copyright 2020 Randi Kreiss. Randi can be reached at randik3@aol.com.

MERRICK HERALD LIFE — November 26, 2020

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