WELCOME GROWTH COMES FROM GROUNDING. ROOTS REACH DEEP IN THE EARTH SO THAT TREE BRANCHES CAN STRETCH TO THE SKY. I AM REMINDED OF THIS EVERY TIME I REACH FOR SOMETHING WITHOUT ROOTING FIRST.
Rethinking what it means to grow was the inspiration for this, our first printed issue of Rebelle Magazine. My hope is to inspire some new ways of considering how we want to expand. I have learned from my own experiences and those shared with me by the contributors in these pages, that growth without grounding isn’t growth at all. As Rebelle, the organization, has evolved and expanded, our ethos exists unchanged. The desire remains to support ambitious women in defining their own version of success, and reach their goals without self sacrifice. This to me, means growth on our own terms, at our own pace, and in our own directions. As I flip through the drafts of these pages, I am struck by all the ways in which growth can occur, by making old things new again (A Modern Upgrade), by deciding where we want growth to take place (A Seat at The Table) and by moving through something challenging (Running Towards Healing). And as many ways as there are to expand, there are for us to take care of our foundation, ourselves. Instead of struggling and striving for what’s next, I am inspired by those who can let the future unfold, who follow ferociously in their curiosity, and who leave space for possibility as they move forward. Root down, let go, and take up the space you need to grow. xox Shannon
self 54
Summer 2022 Issue Sleep More Soundly How a sleep expert says you can
Editor + Designer: Shannon Siriano Greenwood Cover Photography: Sofia Owen
get more zzzzs.
60
Running Towards Healing When faced with infertility, one woman reclaimed her own body.
Rebelle Magazine is a digital and print publication published quarterly, January, March, June, and October by Lemon Umbrealla, LLC (dba Rebelle Con).
in every issue 2
Welcome Words from our Editor.
7
Contributors Meet the women behind this issue of Rebelle Magazine.
Interested in contributing an article to a future issue of Rebelle Magazine or to the Rebelle Blog? Email shannon@rebellecon.com with your pitch or other inquiries.
Seven of our favorite ways to bounce back from the ineviatable set back. If you have these tools in your toolkit to help recover from life's curve balls, you may think differently about risk vs. reward.
Female Founded: Pineapple Collaborative If you are looking to add female founded products to your pantry, look no further. A “where are they now” style update on female founders who spoke at past Rebelle Con, our boutique conference experience, coming back this November.
7 Ways to Combat Decision Fatigue If you are feeling overwhelmed, you are not along. Here is what you can do. Not only are you living through a global pandemic, having your attention pulled by technology and social media, you also have more choices and options than ever before.
keep reading ...
visit readytorebelle.com/blog
7 Ways to Bounce Back from Disappointment
CONTRIBUTORS 1
7
3
4
2
1
Sofia Owen (cover photography) A photographer with a passion for design, Sofia was born in Bogota, Colombia. Founder of SO ATELIER, a studio supporting individuals, companies, and teams to capture, create, and curate brand-aligned visuals through custom photography, video editing, graphic design, and web design.
2
Lustre Home (A Modern Upgrade) A Richmond, VA based interior design and styling company led by Chyrelle Dorinsky and Zhiela Ashatiani. With an infinite love for all things boldly colorful, beautifully strange, classically stylish, and carefully crafted, they are passionate about bringing just the right finesse to projects ranging from large scale remodels, historical renovations or a single room makeover.
3
Anna Koehle (Running Towards Heeling) Wife, mother, yogi, runner, dog lover, and a student of life, Anna focuses her work on supporting families and organizations with education and training on topics such as transracial adoption, cultural competency in human services and inclusive language in child welfare systems.
4
Anne Poarch (Grounding) The founder of BASKET & BIKE, a bicycle tour company that promotes leisurely excursions in nature. Through her business and her poetry, Anne empowers people to connect with the land and their communities in graceful, new ways. The Grit & Joy of Being is her second book of poetry.
5
Natalie Miller-Moore (A Perfect 10) Natalie is a creative connector, bringing together people, words and ideas as a communications consultant. Her passion is: getting women to tell the truth about their lives, so we can all have healthier, more equitable communities.
6
Ellie Burke (Finding Your Why) Holistic Life Coach and Meditation Teacher, Ellie supports individuals in seeing and growing their authentic selves, cultivating holistic wellbeing, and creating lives that feel meaningful and fulfilling. She works with clients 1:1, offers group coaching, teaches weekly guided meditation, and holds quarterly retreats.
5
6
8
career
r
Craft A Better Pitch Creating buy-in, is a process that can be learned and practiced.
We are all making pitches all the time. Whether you work in sales, funding a startup, or trying to get your kids to brush their teeth, there are lessons to be learned so that your ideas are not only heard, but accepted.
LEAD WITH THE PROBLEM It is a common misconception that creating a perfect pitch has to do with painting a picture of the future. But honestly, no one cares about the future if they don’t understand what the stakes are right now. Start by clarifying the problem you want to solve before you explain how you are going to solve it. Pro tip: “Nobody cares what you’re doing, or how you’re doing it, until they know why it matters to them.” - Mike Troiano
TELL A STORY
USE ANALOGIES
Humans are wired for storytelling, so using story to pitch your ideas is one of the best ways to get buy-in. A common story structure has a main character (your user), a problem, and a resolution.
Analogies are a great way to paint a picture of your idea by comparing it to something more familiar. Particularly when you are presenting an idea that seems foreign to your audience, by referencing something they more easily can relate to, you have a way to create understanding. This is a common strategy for pitching startups, and can be used for all kinds of ideas.
Example: I knew a little boy who really wanted to play and didn’t want to brush his teeth, but then he used the Pokemon brushing app and caught his own Pokemon every time he brushed. Now his teeth are sparkling and his Pokemon collection is stocked.
Examples: DogVacay is the AirBnB for dogs or Linkedin is the Facebook for business professionals
PREPARATION OVER PASSION We have all experienced the loudest voice in the room attracting attention, but according to research, passion is not as convincing as preparedness. A study of business plan competitions, startups pitching Venture Capital investors, “showed that preparedness, not passion, positively impacted decisions to fund ventures.” Being prepared to present your ideas is more important than expressing your exuberance.
USE REJECTION AS A LEARNING TOOL It’s all just data. And while rejection can sting, it is truly there for us to learn from it. What parts of your story did they respond well to, what parts of it didn’t connect. Learning from feedback, whether it is direct and explicit or requires some analysis, will make you that much better prepared for the next pitch.
12
A Perfect 10 is Not Perfect By: Natalie Miller-Moore
Here is my one evolving professional (and life) philosophy,
have suffered as a result – both from the extraordinary
I call it “Strive for Nine.” As a recovering perfectionist
effort
workaholic, I find that striving for excellence is admirable,
expending all of my energy, it’s still not good enough.
but you need room to grow. You need to leave space for
This not only inhibited my overall creativity, it also meant I
creativity, imperfection and innovation, too. Always trying
struggled to finish or find any satisfaction in a job well
to get a 10 (cue the scorecard from the Olympic judges
done. Any artist knows that you need to know when to
here) results in some surprisingly negative results in the
stop fiddling with it and just put it out there in the world.
long term.
You can create more, you can create again, you can
as
well
as
the
disappointment
that
despite
iterate until it's sublime. When I was striving for 10, I was so hard on myself, almost paralyzed with whether all the fine-tuning would get it
This doesn't mean, of course, strive for 3 -- don't allow
just right. I have a Type A, oldest child, ENTJ personality
shoddy work or set the bar too low. But expectations
that constantly looks at everything with a critical eye (is
shape our sense of internal criticism, how we work with
there
our teammates and there will always be tradeoffs in time,
some
historic
trauma
coping
skills
in
that?
Yes,
surely.)
money
and
quality
to
disappointment-creating There are ways to do things better, and I truly appreciate
balance. as
Nothing
holding
is
yourself
as
to
a
standard of unachievable perfection.
sublime execution in art, events and creative works. But too often I’ve prostrated myself and my health to the work
I
gods in pursuit of excellence, without proper resources.
component of this. The Stages classes have intervals of
That means that my effort has carried many projects and I
pushing yourself into the high range of red, maroon and
was
in
spinning
class
recently
and
realized
another
purple, but these are interspersed with yellow and orange for medium effort and blue and green for light effort. I was
STRUGGLING
maroon.
And
then
with I
the
resistance
realized,
of
everyone
my
else
ride, was
in on
orange. I was exhausting myself needlessly by doing too much.
And just like my work, there’s actually an art to the aspect of
controlled
effort.
I’ve
realized
with
time
and
experience that unfettered effort doesn’t always get the best results – smart effort does. Work the plan, take
13
“Imagine the perfect scenario for your project. You have everything you need, an unlimited budget, the right staff, plenty of time to plan. Can you see it? Okay, now focus on the most important parts, and do 10 percent of it. You’ll get close to 90 percent of the results.” I like this because in practice, there are things that are small details and there are things that are critical success factors. Imagining perfection is fine. Being crushed when you busted your ass and things aren’t the absolute, ultimate perfection is not.
Nothing is perfect, and imperfection is part of life and critique and execute to the best of your ability. But don’t humanity. Continually reaching for a perfect 10 is push at the highest level all the time. Being able to know unforgiving, while 9 is exceptional and alive. Go do great, the right amount of effort to apply when it takes time and imperfect things! experience to master, and it definitely can be a “sharpen the saw” kind of philosophy. What this can look like: Taking a break, getting away from the computer and Toxic productivity is giving us nothing but burnout and going to read a book. You might get inspired. unrealistic expectations. I think that women are more Go for a walk to let a problem settle before you prone to it than men, with an abundance of cultural respond to your client or co-worker. Turn it around messages about doing it all, and earning your place in until you find the real source of the issue. the work world (which is rarely designed for women.) So if Get up slowly and see if an idea you overlooked we aren’t rewarded or applauded or feel the internal surfaces while you are still in bed. Sometimes you’ll satisfaction, we strive harder. remember a resource you forgot existed… until you paused. Rather than pushing hard, to the maximum 10 level, try to Take a vacation and don’t respond to any messages do your best, but rest and stop and revisit what you are that aren’t about what you are doing on vacation. trying to accomplish. One of my favorite life hacks is from (Like, what are we having for lunch? Or, what time for a college professor who shared this 90/10 rule. (Stay with sunset drinks?) me….It’s not the more popular one.) Plan a project and then set it aside for a while. Come back to it, marvel at your previous genius and then see what the next steps should be.
14
ER rule BREbyAKRebelle Tasha Dean is the Executive Vice President and Head of Production at SuperJoy, a 360 creative playground for all sorts of makers and bright minds. Her client roster over the years includes global brands such as Visa, Apple, Gatorade, McDonald’s, Michelin, Kraft, Johnson & Johnson and H&M,
"I think that we’re creating more of everything lately. I feel there’s more innovation born out of constant making. The growth of plant based food, vertical farming, and metaverse are some of the more interesting ones for me."
R: What did you want to be when you grew up? Tasha: Marine Biologist. The idea of traveling the oceans and finding unexpected creatures at the time was very appealing. R : Do you think any of those early dreams inspired where you are in your career now? T: Yes! It’s the dreaming and hoping that makes us want to achieve the unachievable. When you don’t have much growing up your dreams and ambition are all you have to propel you forward. It gives you something to chase. R: You said, "The challenges we’re facing in the (advertising) industry are coming at us at warp speed.” what did you mean by that? T: I think we were in a constant state of fluctuation. The changes are more rapid and unpredictable today. Leaders need to be able to live at the edge of chaos and be comfortable that nothing will ever be status quo. It can be an uncomfortable place to live in but it’s also a place where the most innovation comes from. What rules do you think you are breaking in your work/career? I think I’m helping to redefine the notion of swim lanes. The hybrid rising is really the idea that each one of us is not defined by any one thing, skillset, or title. We are true hybrids and should be able to express ourselves in our work as such.
RULE BREAKER BY REBELLE Women leaders share with us about where they came from and where they are going next.Know a Rule Breaker who we should meet? Email us at heygirlhey@rebellecon.com
15
comm
unity
SWELL by Rebelle A 12-Month peer mentor program where ambitious professional women can learn, grow, and share. Meet with your very own group of peers, once per month, facilitated by our trusted leadership coaches. http://readytorebelle.com
BUILD YOUR SQUAD Tried and tested ways to get the support you deserve.
Even the most successful women we know doubt their own abilities sometimes. (Trust us, it's more common than you think.) One of the best remedies for self-doubt is finding a support squad, a group of people who can help you make important decisions and work through those inner thoughts that are potentially holding you back. But not everyone has a safe place to go when they need unbiased advice. This kind of support can't come with strings attached from family and friends who just want "what's best for you". Whether you on the verge of a pivotal career move, ready to level up in your current role, or looking to feel more fulfilled in the work that you do, having supportive people around you, will help you gain the confidence you need to reach your goals without self-sacrifice.
TRADITIONAL MENTORSHIP A mentor is someone who asks thoughtful questions. They can be a great resource to navigate professional decisions. HIRE YOUR SQUAD Whether it a therapist, counselor, or coach, there is a time when the guidance of a professional is just the right kind of support. PHONE A FRIEND Reach out to people who know you the best. That's what friends are for. JOIN A GROUP We created SWELL by Rebelle to connect successful women with one another whether they are working inside companies or successful business owners, to create a safe space to talk through challenges and make real change at work and beyond. Visit readytorebelle.com/swell for info.
20
A
s a small business owner getting started, partnerships are essential.
Finding the right support, from professional services to referral partners, are key to building a business. But, having more experienced business owners validating your ideas and providing emotional support, that is what fuels you when uncertainty creeps in. The team at Paisley & Jade have figured this out for themselves and paid it forward. In 2018 co-founders, Perkins Morgan and Morgan Montgomery, signed on as a sponsor for Rebelle Con, our annual boutique conference for women leaders, and have been with us ever since. Their incredible collection of event decor has elevated our event experience and helped us build our brand. From the very beginning, they understood how design could elevate an experience, but their business is truly built on their customer service and how they have invested in partnerships to elevate their industry. We caught up with them to learn more about how they have grown from a small collection of vintage seating, to a warehouse filled with unique pieces to create one-of-a-kind visual displays for events for 10 to 500 people, trade shows, commercials, and productions. R: What was your vision when you started Paisley & Jade? P&J: Our vision with Paisley & Jade was to be able to offer boutique event rentals that stepped beyond the traditional folding chair. Instead we offered vintage curated items and custom built visual displays. We both had the pleasure of working in the local special events industry and saw a need for something new and exciting in the industry. R: Were there other companies doing what you were doing in other markets? How did you know where to start?
23
P&J: There were a few companies in California and Florida who were amazing inspiration but in terms of knowing where to start, ha! That was a fun trial and error that took a few years to work through. With the knowledge we have gained over the past 10 years, we have been able to help other specialty rental companies all over the country with where to start and how to navigate this industry. Everything from sourcing, building, storing, and then communicating to local designers what we source and provide for them.
R: Describe your first few years in business.
R: Any major milestones or big hurdles?
P&J: Our first few years of business were really exciting and required a ton of energy! Because we had started in the industry (in off-premise catering) we had a chance to build relationships with planners, venues, and other vendors who were eager to give us a chance when we first started. It was their support that was absolutely pivotal in our success.
P&J: Really big milestones that we can remember would be learning to back up (successfully) our 12 ft. covered tag- a-long trailer, signing the lease on our first warehouse, and definitely hiring our first employee. The hurdles were almost comical looking back, finding the right fit in lawyers, accountants, insurance providers who understand the service we provide and could represent us accordingly. That took a few years.
24
R: Why did you make the decision to build furniture vs. curating a collection of rentables? P&J: When we started, we were nearly 100% vintage rentals with focus on upholstered pieces and lounge areas. Once we established relationships with event planners, the request for architectural pieces grew in demand. We had ideas for specific pieces and grew the courage to attempt to create them ourselves. What’s interesting about rentals is that it’s not just the final product, you have to consider how it will travel, assemble, and how much space can it take up in storage. R: Your service is above and beyond, in a time where everyone seems to be struggling to find good help, how do you keep such a solid team? P&J: That means the world to us and something we and the whole team here works on continuously. We are service based business and have found that word of mouth from current team members and event professionals have been the most successful! The events industry sometimes has a reputation for a revolving door but we pride ourselves on team members creating a niche for themselves here and growing along with the company.
25
R: We know the sad stats about female founders raising capital. Did you have any problems accessing the money you needed to grow? P&J: We were self funded when we started but as we grew and it was time to access additional capital and there was definitely the instance of banks not taking us seriously and the feeling that we were “ladies playing with pretty things” after going through a few different banks over the years we finally landed on a wonderful bank lead by women and have loved the experience. R: So much of the world has changed in the last few years, but your events business was seemingly unfazed. Why do you think that is? During Spring 2020 obviously the world stood still for a few months and we buckled down and bent over backwards to keep our full time team members employed. Once restrictions liftted slightly, people were ready to celebrate on a small scale and they invested in the specialty rentals. We stayed busy through the Fall of 2020 and then as soon as Spring of 2021 hit, it was the busiest we had ever been in company history in the past 9 years and it’s not letting up anytime soon.
R: During the pandemic you moved into an even larger facility, what motivated the move? P&J: We needed a more efficient space to get our 26 ft. box trucks in and out of the parking lot. We found our new home in Manchester and made a move in July of 2021. This property has been amazing and has additional warehouse spillover space as we navigate the next few years. The goal is to keep the collection manageable in size but upgrade periodically for quality and changing styles. R: What if anything has shifted for you in the past several years in regards to how you think about your business? P&J: Something that has shifted for us over the past few years has been the idea of growth. In the early stages, growth meant taking on new inventory and expanding our depth in collections. The idea of growth now has shifted into reinvesting into our team. Our collection stands on its own but it’s our team members that sets us apart. Part of our growth plan has been making sure the right butt’s are in the right seats and empowering them with the right tools and assistance to take pride in their work and opportunities to take part in local and national associations. The team size has more than doubled since 2020 and the focus is to enrich each of those positions as full time careers.
5 Ways To Get The Best Advice And leave the rest
When emotions are clouding your ability to make the best decision, it's time to reach out.
Having the support of others is essential when navigating uncharted territory, but not all advice is created equal. Opinions from family and close friends can come with attached emotions. Those close to us want what is best for us, but can be distracted by the need to protect us from disappointment. And just because someone has “more experience” than you, does not mean they can give unbiased opinions.
01.
Ask the right person. Not every person in your life is fit to advise on every problem. Family may be helpful at life skills, like how much is too much to pay for an oil change, but may not be as well equipped to help you with strategic career decisions. Knowing who to ask for what kind of advice will set you up to get recommendations suited to the challenge at hand.
02.
Encourage your advisor to ask you questions. Encourage your advisor to ask you questions to clarify, instead of dumping all the details on the table from the moment you sit down. Advisors and mentors who know how to ask questions can help you find the answers within yourself, vs. telling you what you should do.
03.
Practice self-compassion.
05.
Consult your board of advisors. The most important decisions should not be made by one individual. This is where having a “board of advisors” can be your best asset. By having a group of smart people who understand your situation, but aren’t as emotionally involved as friends and family, you have unbiased feedback and a place to process your most important choices.
Many people (especially women leaders) struggle to ask for help and see advice as another form of support they should not need. Have compassion for yourself that you don’t have all the answers. By being kind to yourself and giving yourself the space to explore, you may be surprised by what you discover with the help of someone who cares.
04.
Leave therapy to the professionals. There are some quandaries that are best dealt with in therapy. Know when the advice you are seeking should be coming from a certified mental health professional and when it is ok to ask a friend or confidant.
28
We asked our commuity: what is one of the bravest things you've ever done? Left a toxic work environment after a two months - I've been wired to "tough it out" and to "hang in there" for the sake of being just grateful to be working. --Maggie N.
Speaking in front of hundreds of women professionals and physicians on awareness and self-care. --Arpita P.
Getting over myself! Not letting my negative self talk dictate my next move. --Lauren C. Did a news interview exposing sexual misconduct within the church I grew up in and worked for. Later testified in the trial that followed which made national news. --Amber B.
Admitting I’m wrong and fixing it. Vulnerability is a superpower. --Sherri C.
I started talking openly about my struggles with mental illness. I was nervous about being judged at first, but I knew it was important to show others who are struggling that they aren’t alone. --Saylah J.
Went back to uni to get my masters, 1/2 way around the world in the middle of a pandemic at the age of 50. --Debra K.
30
lifesty
le
A MODERN UPGRADE A true transformation, this renovation and design project shows how creativity and embracing eclectic design can create a space that feels elevated and cozy at the same time.
Designers Chyrelle Dorinksy and Zheila Ashtiani of Lustre Home transformed a traditional colonial row home to an eclectic modern sanctuary.
Q
What was the main goal of this renovation?
A
Updating a classic Richmond row home to the modern taste of the client while preserving the charm we all love.
35
Q A
What are the first few steps in your design process?
A discovery period is important for us to learn about our clients' lifestyle, aesthetics, needs, budget, and vision for their space. We gather inspiration imagery from them and we provide them with some if we have a general idea on what we think they may want to see.
We make sure they’ve seen our portfolio so we know our general aesthetics are aligned.
Q A
What was some of the home functionality that you wanted to improve upon?
The house only had a hall bath on the second floor. When reworking the floorplans a bathroom was added towards the
Consider This: SHARE YOUR REALISTIC BUDGET with your designer/contractor. With the high cost of renovations these days, your team wants to maximize what you’ll get with few surprises so a solid budget is important.
front of the home. We also wanted to create a more functional primary bedroom and ensuite bathroom. A soaking tub was a must from the homeowner and we managed to get one in to the space!
are the first steps Q What in your process?
A
Establishing a preliminary budget right upfront is so important. Getting measurements and blueprints as a starting point. Reviewing existing layouts and then providing our clients with the proposed layouts so they can get to work getting bids from various contractors.
materials made an Q What impact in this design?
A
Paint! Lots of colorful paint and tile. We added a large sliding glass door in the bedroom that allowed for a lot of natural light. It lended an industrial modern feature to the otherwise traditional colonial row home. 36
Consider This: PATIENCE, PATIENCE. Recognize that the timeline may have unexpected disruptions or may not happen as quickly as you would like, but the end result is always well worth the wait.
RETHINKING
STORAGE
The designers reimagined spaces in the home to create impact and functional storage space. Book shelves. They removed the columns on the inside of the home and replaced them with modern open bookshelves. Closets. They added a closet in the primary bedroom by making it a unique feature of the room, vs. a standard closet. Bedroom. A large sliding glass door was added in the bedroom, allowing natural light, and making the bedroom feel larger.
37
was your favorite Q What part of the project?
there any favorite Q Where other design elements.
feedback did you Q What get from the homeowner?
A
A
A
It’s not every project that you get to do a rainbow mural! Getting to work with local muralist, Sarah Apple of Lucky Signs, was so fun!
In the back yard, there was a the secret garden-like escape. We capitalized on the view from the primary bedroom by having a large glass door installed. This allowed the bedroom to feel more open and larger, while bringing some of the nature in. Plus, it added a more industrial modern feature to the traditional space.
"It’s contemporary but also cozy. It’s eclectic but also cohesive. It’s modern but also timeless. And it’s a joy to live in a home that so beautifully reflects my ideal style. It’s exactly what I asked for while also being what I wouldn’t even know to ask for.”
38
Artwork was sourced from both local to Richmond artists and sourced from artists online. 1. "Certified Freak" by Freak Flags https://freakflagsrva.com 2. Art Print Black Frame: Artist Temi Coker https://temicoker.co 3. Shapes Print: Figure Form https://shopfigureform.com 4. Kelsey Copeland of Copeland Studio https://copeland-studio.com/
40
12
OUR FAVORITE FINANCE HACKS Four budget hacks that you need to try.
Keep a Freedom Fund A savings account for expenses you know are going to happen, eventually. Things like car repairs, home repairs, property taxes, or other annual expenses tend to sneak up on us when we least expect them. *This is not to be confused with a “F**k You Fund” which is the amount of money you need (about 6 months of your salary) to say F*** You to your current employer.
Name Your Savings Account In order to prevent yourself from the temptation of pulling money out of your savings account, name it something exciting! You will be much less likely to tap into your “Barcelona Adventure” account for smaller purchases and it will be more exciting to save for something specific versus a generic Savings1 account.
Get Rewarded for Spending If you aren’t using a cash back credit card, you are leaving money on the table. The secret to success in using a cash back card is to make sure you pay your balance in full every month and select a card that offers the best cash back options for your spending with the least amount of fees.
Automate Your Savings Automate as much as you can when it comes to savings towards your goals. Retirement withdrawals, savings into your Freedom Fund and your Savings Accounts can all be set up to automate so you never miss the money you didn’t see in the first place.
42
REBELLE BOOK LIST
BROUGHT TO YOU BY
Thriller “A twisty, fast-paced” (The Sunday Times, London) debut thriller, as electrifying as the #1 New York Times bestseller The Girl on the Train, about impending motherhood, unreliable friendship, and the high price of keeping secrets.
Celebrity Memoir From a crumbling apartment in Central Falls, Rhode Island, to the stage in New York City, and beyond. This is the path I took to finding my purpose but also my voice in a world that didn’t always see me.
Fantasy Fiction A rollicking feminist tale set in 1950s America where thousands of women have spontaneously transformed into dragons, exploding notions of a woman’s place in the world and expanding minds about accepting others for who they really are.
Fiction an intimate, compassionate portrait of a family whose bonds are tested and a community clinging to a vanishing way of life. For generations, the community has lived and breathed timber; now that way of life is threatened. 90's Love Story A breathtaking love story about two broken people who find themselves drawn to each other again and again across their lives, and a funny, uncommonly wise coming-of-age tale set in the early 90s that brims with unexpected moments of joy.
Historical Fiction Cassie discovers suffrage cartoons, diaries, and letters of Kate Easton, the founder of the Birth Control League of Massachusetts, and then she discovers that she and Kate are closely related, even though Cassie had never heard of Kate before then.
Find Discussion Guides for these titles and more at bookclubs.com
44
R E M M SU S T A E R T
from women owned brands
I scream, you scream, we all scream for more women-led startups to receive funding for growth! Wait, that’s not how it goes? If we can’t flip the distribution of venture funding (reportedly only 2.2% of all venture funding in 2021), then at least we can enjoy some frozen treats made by female founders this summer. Yum.
NIGHTINGGALE ICE CREAM SANDWICHES Gourmet and handcrafted, each sandwich uses 14 percent butterfat ice cream plus hand mixed and made cookies. Created by Chef Hannah Pollack, as a dessert option while she was working in a restaurant kitchen, the sammies got so popular that she and her husband/business partner left the restaurant kitchen behind to fully embark on their new venture. Available in Nationwide and endorsed by pop culture celebrity, Nicky Hilton. You can find her very own flavor, Nicky’s Blondie, online and soon to be in stores. https://www.nightingaleicecream.com/
JIJI'S FROZEN CUSTARD FOOD TRUCK Kendall Appich, part of the duo who owns Richmond, Virginia’s coveted frozen custard food truck, announced her goal to serve Wisconsinstyle custard at the “Women In Food” event hosted by Rebelle back in 2019. The response from the crowd was absolutely enthusiastic, and now it’s hard to imagine hot weather without their creamy custard doled out in cones all over the city. They make it fresh and onsite, using slow churn, and special process of egg yolks and less air to create the ultra creamy, decadent, treat. https://www.jijifrozencustard.com/
47
COOLHAUS Founders Natasha Case and Freya Estreller did not feel represented by any of the dessert brands on shelves, not as Millennials, not as women, and definitely not as LGBTQ+ women. They debuted their ice cream at The Coachella Music Festival in 2009, went viral, and grew from there. For them, it’s about more than ice cream. They want to inspire the next generation of diverse founders, entrepreneurs, and creators to live out their dreams. In stores you can find sammies, cones, pints and cups. https://cool.haus/ JENI'S SPLENDID ICE CREAM This artisan ice cream company is headquartered in Columbus, Ohio. Jeni's has over 40 branded 'scoop shops' and retail distributors nationally. Jeni Britton Bauer, Founder and Chief Creative Officer, has built her personal brand as “the” expert on artisan ice cream with two best selling ice cream cookbooks. Jeni’s ice creams are described as having “uniquely smooth texture and buttercream body, with bright flavor and clean finish.” https://jenis.com/
RUBY SCOOPS Rabia Kamara put Richmond, VA on the map when she took home first place, in “Clash of the Cones”, an ice cream competition on The Food Network, in 2021. Located in Northside Richmond, VA, Ruby Scoops is a creator of premium small batch ice creams, sorbets, sherbets, and desserts, all handcrafted and scratch made by Chef & Owner, Rabia Kamara, co-owner Emmett Wright, and the Scoops Squad. https://www.rubyscoops.com/
self
Let it be easy I used to think of growth as a struggle. In my mind, I was constantly pushing against the elements like a flower erupting from the earth after being buried deep down in the cold months before. Or reaching with outstretched arms and on tiptoes for the next rung of the ladder I was climbing. If I wasn’t pushing myself to the maximum, was I really growing at all? As I’ve continued to explore (with curiosity) my ambitions, my motivations, and my desire for growth, I realize I had it all wrong. I am growing whether I am pushing or not. I am learning from mistakes and successes, from those around me, those who came before me, and those coming behind me. I have a choice, to keep the pressure on, or let my foot off the gas once I’ve found the direction in which I am headed. This mantra, “let it be easy” is a way I remind myself that I can do better work in the world when I am not testing my capacity. In order to do the challenging things that need to be done, I must find ease in as many places as I can. -Shannon Siriano Greenwood
6 Time-Tested Tips to Sleep More Soundly How a sleep expert says you can get more zzzzs.
01.
A
ccording to the National Sleep Foundation, up to 67% of women say
they’ve had a sleeping problem at least a few nights during the past month—and 46% said they had problems almost every night. The average adult needs seven to nine hours of sleep each night. Unfortunately, fewer than two-thirds of women (according to the CDC) actually get that much sleep each night.
Consistency is key
Implementing consistent sleep habits is key to achieving restful sleep and ultimately optimal health, and that means waking up at the same time every morning – even on weekends – to strengthen your circadian rhythm.
Try this: Choose a wake-up time that you can maintain even on the weekends. Consider a time that is not too early or inconsistent with your lifestyle.
54
02.
Take work out of the bedroom
Try this: Use the bedroom for sleep and intimacy
Experts agree that working where you sleep can disrupt your sleep schedule and even make you less productive.
only. If you wake up at night and can’t get back to sleep, go to another room and do something relaxing in dim light, like reading a book or journaling, until you feel sleepy. Then get back into bed.
03.
Prioritize time to address worry and stress
Try these: Download Insight Timer, Calm, or
A common sleep complaint is not being
Headspace apps to help guide you
able to fall asleep because of worrisome
through meditation.
thoughts or waking up in the middle of the night stressed about tomorrow’s daunting to-do list.
Write your to-do list down before you go to bed. Perform deep breathing techniques, and not just at bedtime. Proven to reduce
04.
Make your bedroom a sleep santuary
Small bedroom tweaks that can easily
Try this:
improve your sleeping environment are super
Download my free Better Bedroom
simple to address.
checklist for tried-and-true tips on how to craftily curate a sleep-loving Shangri-la. www.morganadamswellness.com/betterbedroom
55
Try these:
05.
Consume consciously
Avoid eating a heavy dinner 3 hours before bed. This could help you avoid potential heartburn or indigestion
What and how we consume – be it food,
Implement an alcohol curfew. If you’re
alcohol, caffeine, and media – makes an
going to enjoy a cocktail or a glass of
impact on the quality and duration of sleep.
wine, opt for one at Happy Hour over a nightcap. Avoid disturbing or overstimulating television. If you’re going to Netflix & Chill before bedtime, consider uplifting content. Choosing shows like Ted Lasso over Handmaid’s Tale is one easy way to improve sleep quality.
06.
Don't jump to medication as a first resort
While prescription sleep drugs can help you
Try this:
become unconscious, sedation isn’t the
Have an evening cup of chamomile tea
same as sleep. Instead, start a new routine
which provides natural sedative properties and a slew of health benefits,
that supports sound sleep
including reducing inflammation, stabilizing blood sugar levels, and improved digestive health.
by: Morgan Adams Former insomniac and two-time breast cancer survivor, is a holistic sleep coach for women who struggle with getting a good
night's
sleep
consistently.
After
spending
almost
a
decade dependent on prescription sleeping pills and her sleep quality suffering greatly despite this, she became inspired to reclaim her rest and help other women feel better and live better – and the key to both begins with a good night's sleep.
WOMEN AND CRYPTO People are talking about crypto. To be honest, up until this point, I haven’t paid much attention. I am not interested in trendy financial advice and to me, crypto seemed like exactly that. It wasn’t until I really started to understand what crypto is, and began reading insights from women reporting on the fintech space, that I became interested in following the industry more closely. I am interested to see what impact women will have on cryptocurrency going forward. What exactly is crypto? Crypto is a digital currency that is not reliant on any central authority, such as a government or bank, to uphold or maintain it. It is digital money, commonly referred to as a coin, that you can buy and sell online without a bank. As an alternative to money issued by a government, it lives in a digital ledger called the blockchain.
57
Why are people excited about crypto? Banks charge fees to move money and quite frankly, they haven’t been offering very good customer service for a long time. It’s also worth noting that the banking industry remains one of the least diverse in the U.S. According to coinbase, an app that allows people to trade crypto, “Crypto makes it possible to transfer value online without the need for a middleman like a bank or payment processor, allowing value to transfer globally, near-instantly, 24/7, for low fees.”
“Bitcoin enables individuals worldwide to find freedom because anyone can use it, irrespective of race, gender and power status, and no one can stop it or control it. This concept may seem like a small impact in America where most of the Bitcoin chatter is around gains and bro talk. But across the country, access to decentralized financial systems can mean life or death.” Women working in crypto? Not surprisingly, we have work to do when it comes to gender equity in crypto. Currently, less than 5% of crypto entrepreneurs are female. Female founders in the space are already attempting to do something about this with the launch of an ambassador program. Defy Trends, a startup that provides AI-backed analytics to retail and institutional investors, hopes that their program will increase the number of women who invest and work in crypto. Women investing in crypto? Roughly 19% of women ages 18 to 29 say they have invested in, traded or used a cryptocurrency, compared with 43% of men in the same age range, according to a recent Pew Research Center study.
Many believe that crypto has the potential to bring equity to financial systems because no government controls this currency and anyone can access it.
Gemini, a regulated cryptocurrency exchange, however suggests the gender gap of crypto ownership could narrow in 2022. Their survey of nearly 30,000 adults across 20 countries, 47% of which were women, showed that roughly 40% of respondents first bought digital assets in 2021. That is a significant number of new investors of which women are almost equally represented.
Nicole Casperson, author of WTFintech, a newsletter covering Fintech news explains it like this:
And to take a step even further, BTC Markets, an Australian based crypto currency exchange, reported a 175%
Photo by André François McKenzie
increase in female users last year compared to 80% increase in male users. They also noted that women made larger initial deposits (averaging $2,381, compared to $2,060 deposited by men). The message we often hear is that women are more conservative investors, meaning they are more risk averse. Their report states "More women trading cryptocurrency dispels stereotypes around cryptocurrency investors being risk lovers." What should you be concerned about? Similar to traditional investing, crypto can be complicated and technical in addition to highly volatile. If you are not cautious you can lose your investments completely. Like any financial decision, it is important to gather information from reliable sources.
Take time to learn about blockchain technology and different currencies offered. At the time of writing this article cryptocurrency values are significantly falling from an all time high in November 2021. But it is worth noting that if you invested 5 years ago, your crypto value could still be up 13% from your initial investment. It is important to assess your own risk and your other investments. Talking with your financial advisor is recommended. What does MY financial advisor say about crypto? I called Christina Todd, CFP®, CDFA®, and my personal advisor to ask her what she thinks about crypto. Her advise: "use caution."
Because crypto is volatile and highly speculative, it is not a recommended alternative to traditional investments but rather a supplement. Why should you keep learning about crypto? It’s not surprising that women are motivated to take financial measures into their own hands after the last few tumultuous years. In February, year over year inflation underwent the highest increase since January 1982. Last year, over 70% of home listings saw a bidding war. Women who are interested in advancing themselves financially, should keep learning more about the investment opportunities available to us, and make the most educated decisions we can for our own financial futures.
4 SPA SERVICES THAT IMPROVE YOUR HEALTH Melanie Mueller, founder of Scents of Serenity Spas in Richmond, Virginia felt her city was missing a destination atmosphere that offers guests a relaxing and peaceful safe-haven. We caught up with her to learn more about her spas and the services they offer that support full body health. Learn more at https://scentsofserenityspa.com/
SOON TO BE 4 LOCATIONS AROUND RICHMOND
3-In-1 Full Spectrum Sauna
Vagus Nerve Massage
Most saunas only offer far infrared, however our full spectrum saunas are designed with the newest technology and includes all three. Mid and far infrared heat starts at a high intensity during this session to increase the body’s core temperature then reduces to a low, comfortable intensity level. This infrared combination improves vascular access flow to reach toxins at the cellular level.
The Vagus Nerve is the longest cranial nerve in the body—reaching from the brain to the belly. It helps regulate stress, rest and digestion. This unique massage experience was created to activate the parasympathetic nervous system and the calming effects of the Vagus Nerve.
Seaweed Bath Soaks A soak in hand-harvested organic seaweed provides deep relaxation and other benefits. Seaweed contains easy to absorb minerals such as calcium potassium iodine and zinc which can help relieve sore muscles, alleviate skin irritation, and improve circulation.
Platinum HydraFacial For those who want results oriented skincare and relaxation the HydraFacial covers both. This patented treatment incorporates vortex technology both deeply exfoliates the skin and provides the most effective infusion of antioxidants into the skin. This service includes lymphatic drainage to reduce inflammation and puffiness while detoxing your face and increasing circulation.
grounding by Anne Poarch
I want to return to the page and the pen to find again what grounds my feet to earth. Taproot to the eternal, moving force of life and love. To spread my arms and penetrate the sky with clouds on my chest and still a smile on my face. Barefoot walking on clumps of clover violet-hued carpet spreading a naturally unkempt lawn. Toes to earth fused rivulets of me watering the soil in great need of our true attention. Holding me erect while tulips Pretty and Poised Punctuate Predominate Part for the billowing bloom to blow shades of white into the crazy blue. I sway softly lacy fingertips grace other out-stretched fingertips so many more exist out there adding their own drops to ours, to our shared and sacred sky And what have you found up there? Did you too find that force that anchors? I have, and I say Look up! Ground, my page Sky, my pen. Much of our growth must come from grounding.
Running towards healing
By: Anna Koehle
“Well IVF for you!” the doctor shouted after the very painful HSG test. I had regular periods, normal pap smears, nothing indicating any problems. Yet there I was on the examining table looking at the screen reflecting dye pooled in my uterus, a collapsed tube on the left and blocked and knotted tube on the right. Shock and shame washed over me as the doctor told me there was no chance of ever getting pregnant naturally. One in four women receiving infertility treatment have tubal related infertility but I felt so alone. We moved forward with IVF in 2018 and found that I was able to produce eggs…lots of eggs! However, due to my age (35 at the time), I was no longer producing high quality eggs. From the over 50 eggs retrieved, I created 15 fair/good quality embryos. Unfortunately, after this process, the doctor discovered my naturally high estrogen levels coupled with weeks of hormone injections for
61
Photo credit (Above): Julie Tashner Photography
the procedure, resulted in a condition called ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome (OHSS). This condition caused uterine polyps that required additional surgery before we could proceed with getting pregnant. OHSS happens to about 1% of women undergoing IVF but was something I had never heard of and was not mentioned as a side effect. Because we are conditioned to avoid conversations about infertility, I avoided asking other women about their experiences with IVF and OHSS.
After the polyp surgery, it was time for the embryo transfer…finally! As we prepared for the procedure, the doctor discovered my body did not create the typical hormone surge during ovulation that occurs for most women. My estrogen levels remain elevated throughout my cycle (which certainly explains my temperament) and prevented the doctor from timing the embryo transfer correctly.
62
After months of tests to understand my body’s natural rhythm we finally did the embryo transfer and waited the excruciating 10 days to learn if I was pregnant. When the call came, I could hear our nurse say to my husband, “It’s negative”. After 18 months of treatment and over $25,000 out-of-pocket, it didn’t work. All of the effort, time, hopes and prayers were shattered in that moment. We later learned that it would never work. Pregnancy was not something that my body would ever be able to do. We donated our 14 remaining embryos to science with hopes that they would be part of research that would help another couple. The months after the failed IVF cycle was the hardest time of my life, a time where I truly questioned if I wanted to live or die. In an attempt to save my own life I decided to focus on the things that my body could do to prove to myself that my body was still capable and that I was still worthy to occupy space on the planet. I decided to try running. As someone who has NEVER been a runner, this was a lofty goal. On that first day I laced up my sneakers and headed down my block. I ran for 30 seconds and stopped. That was all I could do but, I did it! Everyday from that point forward, I would see if I could run a little bit longer, go a little bit further and what I found was that my mind was quiet in these moments. The racing thoughts stopped and the grief subsided. I wasn’t a failure or a defective body, I was movement. I was one with myself and the air and the earth. As my confidence grew, I began to sign up for training teams and virtual 5k races and I found in these spaces, no one asked me about motherhood because no one cared about that. They simply wanted to know me. Infertility made me hide myself because I was so ashamed but in this community of runners, I was seen and known for the first time in such a long time.
63
Being in community, growing stronger and meeting new people who encouraged and coached me to meet goals I never thought possible was restorative to my identity and my soul. It was like fog clearing, giving way to beautiful, golden warm sunlight. That first 30 second run became hour-long runs and freedom in my body again. From this painful journey of infertility, I found a new, deep love for a sport that has made me feel strong and grounded again. I found community and an ability to quiet my mind through movement which has been invaluable. I crossed my first in-person finish line in the fall successfully completing an 8k and setting a personal best time. As I crossed the finish line with tears in my eyes, I saw my husband and my daughter holding a sign that read “Go Mama!” and I shouted to them “I did it!”. It came full circle. I do not consider myself a survivor of infertility simply because I am a mother now. I will always be infertile. I did not overcome, I endured, and I am stronger and better for it. After many years of creating families as a Social Worker paired with my own unique journey through IVF and adoption, I recognized that there was a need for women to have support and coaching through this process. My goal was to use my journey to create a space for women to learn what to ask, what to look for in a doctor, how to prepare for family building if IVF is unsuccessful and to help women identify networks and communities of support before starting this journey. I wanted every woman to walk away with a written plan that she could refer back to when the process becomes overwhelming. In 2019, I started Xona Consulting (formerly known as ShieldHER) to provide consultation and coaching on the IVF process. In 2020 I also began offering adoption consulting and coaching to help prospective adoptive families research and select an adoption agency, understand transracial adoption, create adoption profile books and understand the importance of life story work.
If you are walking the road of infertility here is Anna's Advice: 1. Do your homework .Research your doctor including his or her success rates and experience treating your specific type of infertility. 2. Hold your medical team accountable. Ask questions, know all the options, ask for the testing that you want to help you get the answers you need and don’t be afraid to get a second opinion. 3. Share your story and find community. Tell it to anyone who will listen! Chances are a woman you know is suffering silently right now. 4. Surrender it. Hand the journey over to the universe or a higher power and know that you already have everything you need to be the person you were created to be.
Download a free copy of any issue of Rebelle Magazine. All of our previous issues are available online for free. Subscribe now to receive this issue in your inbox. Join us at
readytorebelle.com and receive a free copy
FINDING YOUR WHY FIVE QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF TO FIND YOUR WHY If you’ve ever set goals for yourself but found yourself unable to follow through to achieve them, you are not alone. When it comes to changing our patterns, habits, and eventually our lives, we must have powerful energy behind us, something that pushes us to keep going when we don’t feel like it. This is where our why comes in. When we know our why, we can then tether all of our decisions and actions back to it. It keeps us motivated. It keeps us inspired. It allows us to prioritize the things that will move us towards our goals versus away from them. It gives us a quality of certainty even in the midst of change and uncertainty. What is the Why? In order to motivate ourselves to move forward on a new or challenging action (aka a step towards our goal), we have to have a reason behind it. That bigger, deeper reason we want to achieve the things we want to achieve. As Simon Sinek, marketing guru in the consumer world, puts it “the Why is the purpose, cause or belief that drives every one of us.” Having a meaningful reason behind your goals, will help to achieve them. Doing something because we “should” is different from doing something we “want or need.” “Should” is connected to the outer or surface-layer thoughts and ideas. “Needs” are connected to the inner desires, something that is more deeply important to each individual person.
THE FIVE QUESTIONS What is the change you want to make?
Why is that change important to you?
Why does that matter?
Why is that important?
Why?
You can keep adding why until you feel clear on your deeper need to make a change. Once you land at an answer that has an emotional tie, an emotional experience connected to it, you’ve found it. Now that you have your Why, from using this series of questions, you can use it as a way to assess your choices going forward. When faced with a choice to take action toward your goal (or not), return to your why. When you feel resistant to take that next right step, come back to your why. Your why, that deep inspiration, has the ultimate power to move you into action. Adapted from this post by Ellie Burke.
Thank you for reading. Here are a few more ways that you can stay in touch.
Contribute and article. Do you have a story or area of expertise that professional women need to know about? Email your pitch to heygirlhey@rebellecon.com
Advertise with us. Get your business in front of professional women interested in professional and personal growth and fulfillment. Email shannon@rebellecon.com for rates.
Subscribe to our email list. Stay in touch to read more articles, learn about upcoming events, and opportunities to contribute your expertise to our community. Visit readytorebelle.com/newsletter
Attend an upcoming event. Additional events will be announced for our 2022-23 season, including our annual conference and smaller events in Richmond, VA Visit: readytorebelle.com.
Join SWELL by Rebelle. Our peer mentorship program is a place for ambitious women to get the support they deserve. Apply to join our Fall 2022 cohort. Visit: readytorebelle.com/swell