ut Mean Girls
lished Author and English Instructor n Kelly Shares Her Findings on Bullying
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Do You think?
we girls are reeach other, we ctly what to say, tell each other erefore we know nds’ secrets. So re is an issue, eseen friends, girls e the sore spots ly what to say in e the person feel worse. Girls fight with words and secrets, while boys fight with their fists.
As far as I’m concerned, girls are mean to girls. Guys are mean to guys. Girls get jealous and think of creative ways to be mean to each other like snubbing and stuff like that. Girls have more awkward “frenemy” situations. Guys are straight up with it if they don’t like each other. Delaney Roberts, ‘16
Murphy, ‘14
“Girl Code?” “Yes. You can’t go after someone’s ex, you can’t buy the same clothes as a friend, and you can’t steal someone else’s friends... and that’s the girl code.” - Courtney Price, ‘15
on’t understand s are creatures rent planet... irl code is an de that causes drama.”
herland, ‘15
I
According
to Alison Kelly, English Instructor, and many others, bullying differs between guys and girls. Girls who bully are typically powerful, popular figures who can manipulate others into their abusive actions, making girl bullying a group-action. Guys who bully typically act alone, partly because they tend to be loners with few friends. Guys can attack anyone, and usually do not know the people that they choose to assault. Girls, on the other hand, make deliberate decisions to isolate a girl that they know, and that they believe deserves to be ridiculed.
Photo by Casey Harris
The Facts
n order to understand bullying, it is important to know a good definition of what bullying is. The three main points of bullying is that it is intentional, it involves a power imbalance, and it happens over time. Bullying usually involves a vicious cycle in which an insecure person puts others down in order to gain more self esteem, attention, or power. The person who becomes a bully often times does receive the attention and power, so he or she continues to bully. Bystanders of bullying can react in different ways, feeling afraid, powerless, guilty for not acting against the situation, or tempted to participate. These feelings lead to a silence among peers who have witnessed bullying, which allows the cycle to continue. One question that is important to understand is why do people, including girls, bully in the first place? Bullies often come from homes in which they are bullied or abused. They feel a sense of control by bullying others that they do not feel at home. Girls who bully most often have a need to feel powerful, and try to give off the impression of being powerful by going after girls who are passive, easily pushed around, or have few friends. Most bullies are also insecure, and attempt to hide their own insecurities by pointing out others. A girl will attack another be-
fore they get the chance to attack her. Most commonly, the underlying cause of bullying is the desire to be “popular.” Girls view popularity as gaining attention from their peers. They believe that being cruel to other people, most often girls, will cause them to be accepted by the “cool crowd.” The sad part is, most mean girls are considered “cool” and have others actually striving to be like them. Girls bully in a way that often goes undetected by adults, or other kids who are not directly involved. Rumors, gossip, and direct verbal attacks are used to make an “opposing” girl get the message that she messed up in the eyes of the bully. Teenage bullying among girls can be caused by a number of issues, some as petty as common interests in dates or dresses. Despite the common belief that girls partake in more, and worse, bullying than guys do, Dr. Perry says she has not seen a disproportion in the number of bullying incidents involving either girls or guys, but it can take different forms according to gender. Alison Kelly, English Instructor, does believe that bullying takes different forms between guys and girls, and differentiates between typical girls who bully, and typical guys who bully. All bullying affects those involved in a negative way. Movies satirize the cruelty among peers, and make it entertaining, but the bottom line is, girl or guy, bullying is intended to hurt others, and in most cases is successful in doing so.
Statistics About Girl Bullying and Self-Image A girl is bullied every 7 minutes in the school yard, playground, stairwell, classroom or bathroom. Only 2% of women think they are beautiful. 90% of all women want to change at least one aspect of their physical appearance. 81% of 10 year old girls are afraid of being fat. 57% of women are targeted for workplace bullying. Girls are more likely than boys to be victims of cyberbullying. Suicide is the third leading cause of death among adolescents and teenagers. Teen girls are more likely to attempt suicide. Three-fourths of girls with low self-esteem engage in negative activities, such as disordered eating, bullying, smoking or drinking.