Quorum Columbus December 2014

Mauricio & Ray’s Green Card Story A Salute to Steve Shellabarger SCRUFF’s Johnny Skandros OC MAY 2014 2014 DECEMBER

TIS THE SEASON TOFREE! BEOR JOLLY STEAL ME -- i’M QUORUM COLUMBUS LGBTQA MAGAZINE

614.745.1693

CONTENTS DECEMBER 2014 6 PERSPECTIVE At Home for the Holidays?

19 MOVIES How Gay Is Too Gay?

32 TASTE BUDS The Thurman Cafe

8 SCENE Return to Glamazonia

20 SARA SHARES Lessons From A Cowgirl

34 SEXPERT ‘Tis the Cuffing Season

10 LEGACY Chris Cozad & Gloria McCauley

22 FEATURE Love, Marriage, Citizenship

36 INTERVIEW Scruff’s Johnny Skandros

12 SINGULARLY SINGLETON Holiday Blues

25 SCENE Gendered Storytelling

38 SCENE Scruff Invades Axis

14 FROM THE ARCHIVES Steve Shellabarger

26 #wantlocal Gear Up for 2015

40 CRAB RACES Crab Racing with Kris

16 DEVELOPMENT Outsmarting Poverty

28 SCENE Pride Leadership Cycle 7

41 FITNESS Still Don’t Know Squats?

18 BARTENDER Courtney Saxon

30 COUPLE Valerie Mailman + Shannon Piper

45 ADOURN The Gift of Giving - Amy Eldridge

QuorumColumbus.com Quorum Columbus Magazine is published monthly by Qmunity, LLC. Quorum Columbus Magazine issues are FREE at distribution locations throughout the greater Columbus area. COPYRIGHT© 2014 Quorum Columbus Magazine. Reproduction without expressed written permission from the publisher is strictly prohibited. All rights in letters, manuscripts, photographs, drawings, illustrations, and artwork sent to Quorum Columbus Magazine will be treated as assigned for publication and copyright purposes and are subject to Quorum Columbus Magazine and Qmunity, LLC terms and conditions. All models are at least18 years of age. All photographs included are posed for by professional models or willing participants in Quorum Columbus Magazine except as otherwise noted. Neither said photographs nor accompanying editorial is indicative of sexual orientation. The publisher of the magazine does not assume responsibility for statements by advertisers.

ALL CONTENT AND RELATED MEDIA ARE COPYRIGHTED © 2014 BY QUORUM COLUMBUS MAGAZINE. All rights reserved.

On the Cover:

Photographer | Ray Lavoie

Professional Portrait Specialist (614) 323-6314 m e @ R a y L a Vo i e . c o m

1777 East Broad Street | Columbus www.fpconservatory.org | 614.715.8100 eventsales@fpconservatory.org Indoor & Outdoor Venues New Venue Opening in 2015

Adam Lowe Photography

Celebrate!

Quorum Columbus Crew Erik Hays

Jerry Turnes

Amy Tannenbaum

Managing Editor

CFO

Web | Multimedia Creative Manager Designer

Columnist Photographer

JM Rayburn

Heather Doughty

Jeffrey Wise

Craig Chadwell

Mike Moffo

Graphic Designer Illustrator

Graphic Designer Social Media Manager

Graphic Designer

Feature Writer

Columnist

Columnist Account Executive

Sara Ernest

Michael Greenhouse

John Henry, Jr

Adrian Jay Neil

Tom Queen

Sile Singleton

Columnist

Columnist

Columnist

Columnist

Columnist

Columnist

Isaac Bendele

Mickey J. Hart

President & Publisher

Editor

Patrick Butler

Allyson Fridley

Photographer

Angel Lemke

Kris Littler

Contributor

Joshua McCarty

Distribution Coordinator

Also on the Crew:

Ray LaVoie, Feature Photographer Calvin N. Cooper, Columnist Clayton Walter, Columnist Clare Hughes, Graphic Designer Tad Niemann, Account Executive Robert Wilson, Account Executive This Month’s Contributors: Amy Eldridge, Writer Ira Graham II, Photographer G. Honaker, Photographer Kari Jasinski, Photographer Maritza S. Nelson, Photographer

CONVENE

| MICKEY J. HART THIS ISSUE IS like a stocking stuffed full of goodies.

Just in time for the holidays, Jeffrey Wise shares the heartwarming story of Columbus’ first same-sex legally-married couple to be granted a green card.

Tom Queen salutes Steve Shellabarger’s leadership and service to the Columbus LGBTQ community over the years. Sara Ernest marks a few things off her bucket list and hits the trail (literally) on her way to becoming a cowgirl.

We also have photos of the concluding events of United Way of Central Ohio’s Pride Leadership Cycle 7. John Henry explores the cold weather phenomenon known as “Cuffing Season.” We catch up with Johnny Skandros about SCRUFF’s recent visit to Columbus. JM Rayburn gets a jump on fresh start items you might #wantlocal in the New Year. Amy Eldridge from Kaleidoscope Youth Center shares about the gift of giving as we adjourn this issue and 2014.

Speaking of giving…I encourage everyone to support any or all of the nonprofit organizations that comprise the backbone of our LGBTQ community: ARC Ohio, BRAVO, Columbus Urban Pride, Equality Ohio, Freedom Ohio, Kaleidoscope Youth Center, PFLAG Columbus, Rainbow Sisters, Stonewall Columbus, TransOhio and The Legacy Fund. Many of the organizations are eligible for tax exempt donations, so your year-end gift may be mutually beneficial. If you don’t have treasure to share, you can always give the gift of your time as a volunteer.

On behalf of the Quorum Columbus Crew, I wish you and yours peace, love, laughter and joy this holiday season.

Mickey J. Hart Editor mickey@quorumcolumbus.com

PHOTO | RAY LAVOIE

#jointhequorum

PERSPECTIVE

| ADRIAN JAY NEIL AS THE HOLIDAYS approach many of us are getting excited about being with our families. We can’t wait to sit around and sing Christmas carols, exchange gifts and listen to family stories told by our parents and grandparents, but for some of us, the holidays aren’t so joyful. The holidays can be a reminder that we aren’t accepted by our families of origin for who we really are and that we may never be accepted.

When Christmas break was approaching during my college years, I remember not wanting to go home. Believe it or not, I looked forward to finals more than I looked forward to going home to see family and friends. I was out in college and proud of who I was. I had even been featured in an online article and facilitated a program called “Bridging the Gap” that brought students from different backgrounds and beliefs together to make Ohio University more inclusive for students. Despite those achievements, I still felt a sense of shame, especially when I went home for the holidays.

At home, family would inquire: “Who are you dating? How pretty is she? When will you be bringing a girl home to meet us?” I would always respond with, “I am focusing on school,” or, “I am not ready to be serious.” If I was dating someone and didn’t want them to know it was a guy, I would refer to him as “them” or “they” instead of using masculine pronouns. Each time I did this, I felt more and more ashamed. I felt as though I could not be me—whoever that was—with the people who are supposed to support and love me, no matter what.

I felt isolated. While everyone else was talking about their successes in their majors or lives, I felt I had to keep mine a secret because I felt as though anything that dealt with being gay was not a success but a disappointment to my family.

These experiences and others like them left me feeling alone, and unfortunately, this is what many LGBTQ individuals are facing every time they contemplate going home. They have to choose between being with their family of origin, being with the new family or families they have developed and chosen for themselves, or being alone.

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DECEMBER 2014

They have to see their brother or sister with their new wife or husband and be reminded that they cannot bring their partner to the family holiday gathering because it’s not accepted. It’s bad enough that there are certain state officials who refuse to recognize same-sex relationships, but not having family recognition and support is worse.

AT HOME, FAMILY WOULD INQUIRE: WHO ARE YOU DATING? HOW PRETTY IS SHE? WHEN WILL YOU BE BRINGING A GIRL HOME TO MEET US? The holidays are meant to be a time where families gather and celebrate one another, a time where everyone feels comfortable and loved rather than experiences anxiety and discomfort because of who they are. Whether you consider your family to be the relatives you grew up with or the people you have met throughout your life, make sure that they love and respect you unconditionally. The holidays should be spent celebrating everything you are.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

SCENE

GLAMAZONS RETURN TO

8

DECEMBER 2014`

WALL STREET NIGHTCLUB

PHOTOS | ALLYSON FRIDLEY

LEGACY

2014 Legacy Fund Honorees

Chris Cozad and Gloria McCauley

CHRIS COZAD AND GLORIA MCCAULEY are a dynamic duo who have been making Columbus and the rest of Ohio better for LGBTQ people for the past 32 years. Their activism and service to the LGBTQ community began in the 1980s during the early days of the AIDS epidemic and have continued through various causes and organizations.

In 1996, the couple co-founded the Buckeye Region AntiViolence Organization (BRAVO) to eliminate violence perpetrated on the basis of sexual orientation and/or gender identity, domestic violence and sexual assault. Gloria and Chris remain integral parts of the group’s leadership to this day.

The Legacy Fund of The Columbus Foundation is one of the few permanent funds across the country established to addresses the needs of the LGBTQ community. This fall, The Legacy Fund recognized the Chris and Gloria’s dedicated and on-going work at a reception where they were presented the 2014 Legacy Fund Honors Award.

Legacy Fund Honors Award Recipients: 2006: 2008: 2010: 2012: 2014:

Rhonda Rivera Fred Holdridge & Howard Burns Lynn Greer Steve Shellabarger Chris Cozad & Gloria McCauley

Learn more: TheLegacyFund.org BRAVO-Ohio.org PHOTOS| MARITZA S. NELSON

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DECEMBER 2014

Check out these upcoming Stonewall events!

ACA Enrollment Assistance Event Saturday, Dec. 6 11:00am-4:00pm

ACA Enrollment Sessions Schedule: 11am • 1pm • 3pm Please arrive 10 minutes early for sessions 1/2 hour sessions followed by 1-on-1 assistance with a Certified Application Counselor enrolling on the healthcare.gov website.

Free parking for participants!

No registration required!

Same Sex Couples Tax Seminar

After DOMA and Taxes: What it means to you

Tuesday, Dec. 16 6:30-8:30pm

New Updated Information for 2014!

Join us for this educational talk on how your federal, state and local taxes will now need to be prepared.

Whether you prepare your taxes yourself or use an accountant, be sure you have the most up-to-date information.

Speaker: Lea Ann Maceyko, CPA For more information, call 614-299-7764

stonewallcolumbus.org/event/tax-seminar-2014

Both events at Stonewall Columbus • 1160 N High St • Columbus, OH • 43201

614-299-7764 | stonewallcolumbus.org

SINGULARLY SINGLETON

HOLIDAY BLUES

Just Like the Ones I Used to Know | SILE SINGLETON I WOULD LOVE TO write, “Wow, what a year it’s been!

I can’t even believe the time has gone by so fast, and I am so grateful for the things that I have.” Dammit, I suppose I wouldn’t be lying, but it all sounds a bit too damn cheery, and I feel opposed to glee right now.

It could be that I’m coming home in the “fall back” darkness of winter, and honestly, being grumpy is easy when there is a lack of sun. The truth of the matter is that this year has been tumultuous, full of intense emotion, some incredible highs and some sniffling-in-the-bathroom-stall-at-work, cursing-theamplifying-nature-of-tile-and-metal lows. I have to remind myself that what I have just described is simply life.

You’d think as a card-carrying Christian who loves the history and tradition behind Jewish holidays, who can’t say enough about the benefits of going to retreat, meditating and praying with the Sisters of Benedictine, as a person who will take you to church preaching the “restorative gospel” of Teresa Caputo, while—mind you—my two-spirited self applauds the accuracy of Chinese New Year ideology, you’d really think I’d somehow sidestep the “Life is so much work, and sometimes it really sucks” sadness pitfall. Yeah, right. I wanna be an evolved-beyond-foolish-human-emotion super-extraterrestrial, but I am not. I’m not even a sidekick.

I’m just a human, momentarily holiday blue. It happens.

This, as I think about it, is not really different from any the holiday seasons past. Maybe it’s different for the “breeder-less,” but for “Glitter Pants Jones” (that’s me at the holiday party), the old familiar whirlpool of stress starts the week before Halloween when my mom begins her, “Your Daddy and I are having Thanksgiving this year. Who’s coming? I need to get a count.”

Before I know it, I’m being asked to remember where we went last year and which relative has been visited three times already this year. Excuse me? I mean I barely recall a world before candy cane drool was glistening down my favorite winter beanie.

Why? My daughter begins her giddy chatter about my brother Warren’s Jesus’ birthday cooking the day after Halloween.

The day-mares soon follow with images of my son’s crinkledat-the-corners eyes in the rear view mirror, as he repeats like a recorder playing, “Mama, where we going fa duh hollerday?” I fall for the trap. “It’s For The Holiday , honey.” Maniacal laughter muddled by some of the promised 45 days of “familyfriendly Santa” music follows, and then the shouted response: “That’s what I saaayd.” For the last two years, “Where we going fa DUH holler-day!” Over and over, I hear those words.

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“Mama? Did ‘dhew’ heard me?”

Ting-ting-tingling.

“Mama?”

You know, it’s lovely weather.

“Mama?”

I WANNA BE AN EVOLVEDBEYOND-FOOLISHHUMAN-EMOTION SUPEREXTRATERRESTRIAL, BUT I AM NOT. I’M NOT EVEN A SIDEKICK. I’M JUST A HUMAN, MOMENTARILY HOLIDAY BLUE. Before I realize it, I drift away like flakes in a snow globe, shaken but steadfast and committed to what I know, that this pesky moment, minor in the scheme of things, too, shall pass. I’ll thaw out by June, all raring for the challenge of Pride month, and it will all be worth it. Heeyyy, we’ll both wave our rainbows high. Come December 2015, I’ll most likely be having to remind myself again that life happens, ups and downs, and I am blessed to have it. After all, in a few more years, my son will most likely be sulking that he has to hang with the family at all, and I will be the day-mare of his dreams.

“Mama?”

“Yes, Brynt?”

“I luuub you.”

“I luub you, too, Brynt.”

“Mama?”

“Yes Brynt.”

“You not say lubbb right.”

“OK, Brynt, I LOVE, you.”

“Me, too, Mama.”

“Mama?”

“Yes?” “Where we going fa duh holler-day?”

Sighhhhh. Merry, Blue Merry!

SouthBend "Still Your Favorite Corner Bar!"

Franklin Co. Childrens Services Benefit Toy Drive Sat Dec 6 - 6pm O.C.C.O. Holiday Party Sat Dec 13 - 2pm Blackburn Project Sun Dec 14 - 6 to 9pm Special Christmas Show with Riley Andrews Sun Dec 21 - 6pm

Christmas Eve with Tracy Lords Wed Dec 24 - 6 to 9pm Celebrate with Georgia Jackson for her 60th!

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Hours: Mon / Sat - Noon to 2:30 / Happy Hour Noon to 8 / Sun 12 to 12 Nightly Events call for more info or visit us at facebook.com/SouthbendTavern 126 E. Moler St. Columbus, Ohio (614) 444 - 3386 Southbend@wowway.biz facebook.com/SouthBendTavern

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Coming soon to Polaris Culinary crafts done right. (discover what Cbus foodies, wine lovers, and beer aficionados are all talking about)

thecaskandbarrelpolaris.com 8745 Sancus Blvd.

FROM THE ARCHIVES

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DECEMBER 2014 2014

Steve Shellabarger: | TOM QUEEN MANY OF YOU may be too young to know about the controversy which surrounded entertainer Anita Bryant: the Florida Orange Growers’ spokesperson led a high-profile campaign to overturn the Miami/Dade County, Florida ordinance which prevented discrimination due to sexual orientation. This was way back in 1977, and for Columbus’ legendary Steve Shellabarger and many others, it was a proverbial “call to arms.” It wasn’t long afterward that the HRC (then named Human Rights Campaign Fund) began to materialize, and thanks to the efforts of Steve and a few other dedicated local pioneers, the Columbus group became one of the earliest financial backers of the fledging organization’s office in Washington, D.C.

In addition to his activism, Steve was one of the pioneers who helped turn German Village into the “gayborhood” it became in the 1980s and 1990s. He and his partner of 17 years, Steve Marquis (“Little Steve,” as he was known to many), bought and remodeled many houses in the neighborhood, which was in decline at the time. Little Steve was the first Spanish teacher in the Columbus Alternative High School. Unfortunately, he contracted AIDS early in the plague, but the way the situation was successfully handled by the Columbus Schools became a model statewide.

Little Steve succumbed to the disease in 1990.

“Big Steve,” like everyone who lived through the dark days of the AIDS crisis in the 1980s, lost many loved ones to the disease. Steve lost his second longtime partner, Andy, to the disease just three years ago. He also recalls losing the friendships of many former gay friends who weren’t comfortable with his activism. Undaunted by this, his resolve remains unwavering. “If I see something that I feel passionate about, I tend to get involved.”

Steve grew up in Dayton and came to Columbus to attend OSU, graduating in 1967. His lifelong interest in politics stems from his former profession as a high school history teacher. Like many, Steve grew up in a Republican family. It was during the Reagan era that the Religious Right began to force bigotry into the official platform of the then more diverse party, turning it into the divisive entity that it is today. This also happened to coincide with the beginnings of the AIDS crisis.

As Steve recalled to me, “The gay civil rights movement is built on AIDS. People who died of AIDS are martyrs.”

This was also a time when those who contracted the disease were ostracized from their families, and many lost their jobs. Steve chose to get involved in the fight, rather than stand back and remain silent. He remarks, “The only way we were going to make any progress was operating within the system.” Steve began by working on the first Columbus HRCF fundraising event in 1983, which was held in the party room of the fabled Americana apartment building downtown. The event raised $6,000—all in cash due to donors’ fears of being outed by someone finding a personal check. Steve went on to serve eight years on the national board of HRCF, including two as its co-chair.

Steve now divides his time between his homes in the Short North, Buckeye Lake and Fort Lauderdale. While he continues to play a supportive role in HRC and Stonewall Columbus, he has passed the mantle of leadership on to the next generation of activists.

He is often “around and about” the Short North.

If you see him, go up and give him a handshake or a hug. It’s because of the many years of hard work and sacrifice by Steve and his comrades that we’ve got it so good today.

PHOTOS | RAY LAVOIE

2014 DECEMBER

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DEVELOPMENT

OUTSMARTING POVERTY A NEW MODEL OF AFFORDABLE HOUSING

| JM RAYBURN IN 2003, THE OHIO CAPITAL Corporation for Housing (OCCH), a local nonprofit corporation, acquired the largest portfolio of project-based Section 8 (governmentsubsidized) rental housing in the nation. The portfolio contained 250 buildings across seven inner city Columbus neighborhoods. In partnership with a number of community organizations, and with the active support of federal, state and local government, OCCH implemented a $133 million initiative to plan the redevelopment and rehabilitation of over 1,000 units of affordable housing. It then created the nonprofit Community Properties of Ohio (CPO) to serve as a mission-driven property management firm.

As full disclosure, I work for CPO as a property manager for the portfolio mentioned above. I manage 320 affordable housing units across 63 buildings in the King-Lincoln District, Olde Town East and Franklin Park neighborhoods.

I was drawn to CPO in 2011 when CPO’s Chief Operating 16

DECEMBER 2014

Officer, Chad Ketler, gave my graduate course in urban housing a presentation on how the company manages affordable housing differently from competitors. As CPO’s President and Chief Executive Officer Isabel Toth loves to remind staff, “It’s not what we do, but it’s how we do it.” CPO’s “how” is by an innovative, results-driven culture. The company has piloted a number of affordable housing models tailored to the unique challenges faced by low-income and no-income populations.

One pilot program in particular, The Columbus Scholar House, deserves recognition because it serves as friction against multi-generational poverty: the program involves setting aside some units of subsidized, affordable housing to meet the needs of student parents who want to attend college. The program launched in August 2012 with ten units in The Charles Building on N. 17th Street in the King-Lincoln District. Residents of The Columbus Scholar House must be enrolled full-time in an accredited

Ohio college or university and maintain a minimum 2.5 GPA. The current residents collectively maintain a 3.3 GPA. As the Director of Property Management, Denise Liston, puts it, “These residents have jobs, are raising kids and attend college full-time. They do it all.” Currently, The Columbus Scholar House residents attend OSU or Columbus State Community College.

To make this program work, the Columbus Metropolitan Housing Authority (CMHA) provide Section 8 vouchers.

The scholars pay 30 percent of their adjusted gross income in rent, and utilities are included. CPO partners with two local universities’ early childhood education programs to provide educational enrichment for scholars’ children. CPO also assists these young parents in getting their kids into summer camps or other special enrichment opportunities.

The Columbus Scholar House expansion [28 units]

The Scholar House is at full capacity. Families eager to take advantage of the opportunities offered through the program are on a waiting list; therefore, CPO has been given the green light to expand the program with an additional 28 scholar units. There are nine different colleges located within four miles of The Columbus Scholar House, and several have approached CPO to play a role in the expanded program.

“We’re really serving two generations,” Toth says. “The Scholars are earning their degrees, and their children are receiving enrichment programs and are watching their mom or dad make education a priority.”

Affordable housing serves an important role in neighborhood stability and economic empowerment.

As members of the community we ought to support The Columbus Scholars House and everything it stands for — self-improvement, accountability and momentum to move beyond poverty.

SCENE BARTENDER | ANGEL LEMKE FOR OVER 20 YEARS, Columbus has known that Slammers is the place to be to enjoy cold beer, a laid-back atmosphere and, most importantly, great pizza. For the last eight months, Courtney Saxon has been behind the bar at this local institution, bringing six years of prior bartending experience with her. “Being downtown, far from the Short North, Slammers still manages to have a strong following,” she says, and that famous pizza is a big part of it. “We have other goodies on the menu, but our pizza is gold.” Courtney recommends adding a little bacon to the “fan favorite” white pizza “because what isn’t good with bacon on it?”

While you can enjoy happy hour until 8 p.m. every weeknight at Slammers, Free Pizza Wednesdays from 5 to 7 p.m. can’t be beat, though you can still get $4 off a large pie on Thursdays while enjoying the recently returned karaoke night. It’s the ever-changing nature of the Slammers crowd that makes the job fun for Courtney. “We have a revolving door for all sorts of groups of people,” she notes. “I meet at least one new person every shift.”

Courtney is also a full-time student at OSU with the long-term goal of becoming a Physician’s Assistant. “Right now I’m just trying to survive chemistry!” She loves being a part of the community: “The Columbus LGBTQA community continues to grow every day and is so open and welcoming to people from all walks of life. At the end of the day, we’re all family.”

WHO:

Courtney Saxon

WHERE:

Slammers Bar & Pizza Kitchen 202 E. Long Street Columbus Ohio 43215 614.221.8880

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AUGUST 2014

COCKTAIL: Ketel One on the rocks with extra olives.

FUN FACT:

Courtney is also a nanny for “the most adorable nephew ever!”

PHOTO | JOSHUA MCCARTY

MOVIES

HOW GAY IS TOO GAY? | CLAYTON WALTER NOT ALL QUEER films are created equal – not only in terms of quality, but in terms of queerness. There are certain movies that are made specifically for a queer audience. These movies aren’t afraid of flamboyance; they’re draped in camp, littered with in-jokes that would likely land with a thud outside of the community and are not afraid to “go there.” When asked to describe certain queer films to straight friends, I start with “It’s really gay.” I don’t say that as a condemnation, nor as praise. It’s more a friendly warning to those viewers who might not be ready to watch something so fabulous.

Sometimes, these movies are really fun to watch. Pedro Almodóvar is perhaps the greatest queer filmmaker in the world, and his movies are often dripping in colorful, salacious melodrama. His airplane-set comedy I’m So Excited! is perhaps the gayest movie I’ve ever seen. Every character aboard the film’s cursed flight is at least bi-curious, leading to plenty of comic situations and the best dance number ever staged in a non-musical. It’s a slight entry in the auteur’s repertoire, but it is a treat to see something that has so much fun with its characters’ sexuality.

I never thought that it was possible for a movie to be “too gay” until I was recently sent a copy of a movie titled simply The Gays, written and directed by T.S. Slaughter. I figured even the queerest movies were harmless, as they catered to an underserved audience.

Straight viewers who might stumble upon them would likely be a little lost, but might gain some insight into a foreign community. No harm, no foul. The Gays, on the other hand, is harmful in how foul it is.

Slaughter has a noble goal. The Gays is barely a film; it plays more like a flashback-heavy episode of a familyfriendly 1980s sitcom like Full House, and as it parodies the sitcom form, it also parodies the way those shows shelled out conservative family values. Here those values, dispensed by monotone patriarch Rod Gay (Frank Holliday) and campy matriarch Bob Gay-Paris (Chris Tanner), are shocking taboos, as they instill their children with the sort of extreme gay propaganda that our community is accused of employing in our quest to achieve the “gay agenda.” It’s a fine match of form and function, but Slaughter fails to edit himself, and the result is vile.

For a gay viewer, The Gays won’t prove shocking; sure, there’s more full-frontal nudity and gross-out dialogue than in a usual movie, but it’s about equivalent to spending an hour on Grindr. The danger comes in how this movie might be received by anyone else who happens upon it (chances are, not many). This is a movie that is specifically designed to cater to a queer audience. It is vulgar without focus. Slaughter throws every nasty thing he can think of into the film without a filter, and thus, what he’s trying to achieve becomes lost in the shuffle of gags and ball gags. The Gays spews venomous platitudes, daring viewers to be offended and suggesting that anyone who feels offended should also feel ashamed to be offended. It’s an ugly, hateful film, one that wields its queerness as a barbed club, bludgeoning viewers into numbness and sacrificing its social commentary and humorous moments at the altar of poor taste. The Gays is only interested in shocking its viewers, which is the last thing a queer filmmaker should be trying to achieve.

2014 DECEMBER

19

SARA SHARES

| SARA ERNEST DREAM VACATIONS. We’ve planned them out in our minds for months or years until everything falls into place and we’re finally able to turn those dreams into reality. My partner Lori and I finally, after six years, had the chance to realize one of our dream vacations.

We had been talking about going to Puerto Rico since one of Lori’s co-workers took a trip there and told us about the bio-luminescent tour that she had taken. It sounded like an incredible experience and immediately went onto my bucket list.

We did our research and talked to Puerto Rican friends about what we should do there. Of course, the bio tour was a requirement. So was the possibility of yoga on the beach. I found that there was horseback riding on the beach, yet another thing on my bucket list. Our inner cowgirls were ecstatic, although a bit nervous trying to determine which would be the best riding company to trust. We made our choice, though, and we were set.

A week and a half before we were set to leave, I developed such intense back pain that I could hardly move. Putting on shoes and socks became adventures in contortionism, and I had to sit on the floor in front of the dryer in order to fold my clothes. How was I going to ride a horse in paradise and fulfill my dreams of island cowgirl adventure?

Getting to Puerto Rico was one of the worst travel situations we’ve ever been in, which didn’t help my back, and we were supposed to go on our trail ride bright and early the morning after we got there. I was devastated.

I soldiered on, though, and we showed up for our trail ride as planned. Walking up the driveway to the riding company started to ease the pain in my back to the point that I knew I would be OK if I just focused on how incredibly beautiful our surroundings were. Lori and I are both suckers for an island vacation, and experiencing it in person made me understand why Puerto Rico’s slogan is Isla de Encanto, or Island of Enchantment.

We started the ride and saw some really incredible things.

Who knew that on a clear day it is possible to see the Virgin Islands from Vieques, Puerto Rico, 45 miles away?

Around the halfway point in our adventure, I fell off my horse.

It was probably one of the most surreal moments of my life.

My horse got spooked, and suddenly, I was on the ground.

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DECEMBER 2014

It happened so fast that there was nothing that I could do to stay in my saddle. It was a Looney Tunes moment: you know, the Wile E. Coyote cartoons, where he’s chasing the Road Runner and runs right off a cliff and then hangs there before he falls? That’s how I envision my fall off the horse.

I got up and took stock of my situation. I’m really glad that I was wearing a helmet because otherwise I probably would have gotten a concussion. As it was, I ended up pulling some muscles in my neck and back and had a touch of a headache for a while. I was covered in dirt and a little trepidatious, but the first thing I did was jump right back on that horse.

The women from the riding company told me I was on my way to being a real cowgirl now that I had taken my first spill. The women said to be a real cowgirl you have to fall of your horse at least 30 times. I’m satisfied with once.

From this point, we rode through a dried-up riverbed onto a black sand beach, which, as it turns out, was yet another thing on my bucket list. The final stretch was riding through the pasture where the horses are kept, which prompted both Lori and myself to say that, in our next lives, we wanted to come back as horses who work for this riding company.

I guess what it comes down to is that sometimes in life we fall off horses. Most of the time, it’s not a bad thing. Granted, it’s not fun, but getting back up on the horse can show us how strong we are and lead us to some of the most beautiful moments of our lives.

2014 DECEMBER

21

FEATURE

Love, Marriage, Citizenship:

M auricio

and

Ray

,

s

Story

|JEFFREY WISE MAURICIO FERNANDEZ AND RAY VALENTINE were married on September 26, 2013 on the beach in Provincetown, Massachusetts.

In addition to celebrating their love for one another, their legallyrecognized marriage allowed them to achieve something that heterosexual international unions have always enjoyed: a green card. Mauricio, a native of Mendoza, Argentina, had lived in the U.S. illegally for 13 years. His time as an illegal alien was finally over.

Mauricio came to the U.S. in October 2001 while Argentina was on the visa waiver program, allowing citizens from stable governments to travel for up to 90 days without prior permission. The $400 a month he made working at an Argentinian bank left him wanting, and he decided to come to the U.S. to seek a better life.

Mauricio had some advantages not every immigrant enjoys. He arrived in California with some cash in hand and already speaking English. His father had sent him to private schools in Argentina and had encouraged of him to learn English. After a short time in the country, he moved to Indianapolis because a friend from Argentina lived there. He stayed there for only a few weeks before heading to Miami. Mauricio was there when his visa expired, but he made the decision to stay in the U.S. He found a job that paid him under the table and worked there for five months.

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MAURICIO AND RAY BECAME THE FIRST COUPLE IN COLUMBUS AND THE SECOND COUPLE IN OHIO TO BE GRANTED A GREEN CARD THROUGH THEIR MARRIAGE AS A SAME SEX COUPLE.

Mauricio then moved to Indiana, living first in Bloomington and then in Vincennes in short succession. He landed a job at a restaurant, allowing him to get his own apartment and buy his first car. After two years of hard work, the restaurant’s owner asked Mauricio to manage a new restaurant venture in Mishawaka, Indiana. He accepted the offer, but knew it would mean even longer hours. As is common with businesses willing to hire illegal immigrants, Mauricio’s employers left him overworked and underpaid.

While in Mishawaka, Mauricio started a romance with a man from Columbus named Ed. Their relationship inspired Ed to make the five hour drive to visit many times before Mauricio made the move to Columbus in 2006. Mauricio had saved enough money in a bank account opened with only a tax ID number. Such accounts are not difficult to set up for those living in U.S. illegally. The system allows illegal immigrants to file taxes; Mauricio began filing taxes shortly after he arrived in the U.S. Once in Columbus, Mauricio discovered a natural talent for photography, so he bought better camera equipment and eventually made it a side job. Over time, friendship replaced romance between Mauricio and Ed. Mauricio found a job at a local eatery which gave him an invaluable opportunity to live and thrive in Columbus’ LGBTQA community. His roots in Columbus grew deeper, and he joined the Columbus Gay Men’s Chorus. He built many friendships and worked very hard. In April 2010, Mauricio’s connections grew stronger when he met Ray. It did not take long for them to fall deeply in love and eventually move in together.

PHOTOS| |RAY RAYLAVOIE LAVOIE PHOTOS

FEATURE Time passed for the couple, and the news regarding the Supreme Court hearing a case involving the constitutionality of the Defense of Marriage Act came to their attention. As SCOTUS struck down DOMA on June 26, 2013, an unforeseen opportunity for Mauricio and Ray became closer to reality. The next day, the federal interpretation of the decision determined that same-sex marriages not only needed to be recognized, but they also necessitated equal treatment with regard to immigration. The love that Ray and Mauricio shared could now allow Mauricio to come out of hiding about his citizenship status.

Mauricio remained a bit skeptical until a chance encounter with Brian DeFranco at the Latin Festival. Having recognized him from a previous visit, Brian approached Mauricio and introduced him to the idea that the DOMA ruling applied to his situation and would allow him to gain a green card. Once legally married, the couple paid the legal fees necessary to pursue the green card in early December. After a relatively speedy process, as immigration decisions go, Mauricio received his green card on February 19 this year.

Having lived in hiding for so long, Mauricio felt the idea that he would no longer need to hide almost seemed too good to be true. Even though their love and marriage are genuine, their lawyer advised them to memorize pages of information regarding each other’s families and family history in case the application was contested. In the end, this proved to be unnecessary. It all came down to a clerk at the counter of the immigration office. With her simple words, “I approve you” and some paperwork, Mauricio and Ray became the first couple in Columbus and the second couple in Ohio to be granted a green card through their marriage as a same sex couple.

After receiving his green card, a friend approached Mauricio about a potential job opening. Interested in the position, Mauricio started working on his resume. “I got to create a resume for the very first time!,” he said. Mauricio applied for the job and landed an interview with Norse Dairy Systems. The interviewer was very impressed with his resume and offered him a job. He started the new job in early September. This past Labor Day was the first paid day off Mauricio had ever had in his life.

The journey to become a legal resident has been a difficult one for Mauricio, but through the steadfast love and support from Ray and their unwavering commitment to each other, they can finally share their story openly.

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PHOTO | RAY LAVOIE

SCENE

TEA TIME: Gendered Storytelling

QUEER BEHAVIOR, in collaboration with OSU’s Counseling & Consultation Services and Student Life Multicultural Center, invited queers and allies to come together for Tea Time, a gendered storytelling event in the Alonso Family Room of the Ohio Union on November 19. The names of the storytellers were drawn from the fish bowl, and what followed included tales of body hair acceptance, body parts that move more than their owners realize, and dancing until the parents got home. The event was part of OSU’s Trans* Awareness Week.

PHOTOS |ANGEL LEMKE

2014 DECEMBER

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#WANTLOCAL

#wantlocal

Gear up for 2015

“Every time you spend money, you’re casting a vote for the kind of world you want.” — Anna Lappé

| JM RAYBURN AS THE YEAR draws to a close, it’s time to start thinking about 2015. To start the year off, let’s make a commitment to well-being and beauty.

This edition of #wantlocal features local products and services geared toward grooming and rejuvenation. Here’s to a more invigorated you in 2015!

MEN’S CUT, $30 Square One Salon and Spa, 275 S. 4th Street

SquareOneSalon.com

All the professionals at Square One have a deep commitment to helping you look and feel your best, keeping their customers coming back. This isn’t your typical men’s cut: it includes a scalp massage, shoulder massage and mini facial. Go on a Friday after work to help usher in the weekend the right way, looking fresh and feeling rejuvenated.

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PHOTOS | RAY LAVOIE

SAIPUA SOAP, $10 Tigertree, 787 N. High Street

ShopTigertree.com

Any time I need a last minute gift, or just feel like browsing an eclectic space, I stroll over to Tigertree. This boutique has quite a product assortment including handmade Saipua soaps. All batches begin with food-grade Italian olive oil, dark green in color and rich in moisturizing elements. The soaps are comprised of herbs, butters, natural extracts and essential oils. Each bar is hand-cut, air-dried and cured in their workshop. The soap bar is then scented with essential oils and wrapped in a Cavallini paper depicting vintage maps of Rome. I chose the cedarwood with eucalyptus and mint because it is calming and reviving.

DETOX PAMPER PACK, $12 Bink Davies, 668 N. High Street

BinkDavies.com

Bink Davies is my go-to-place for unique presents and household accessories. The store sells the Detox Pamper Pack for a spur of the moment pamper-fest. Each pack contains ample supplies and great scents and is easy on the pocketbook. These are no high-end miracle products, but they’re fun for that “Treat yo’ self” moment.

INTENSIVE HYDRATING MASK, $22 Phía Salon, 755 N. High Street

PhiaSalon.com

Keeping your skin hydrated is a priority in the winter months. A great way to combat the harsh onset of winter is to invest in a hydrating mask. Phía Salon in the Short North carries an intensive hydrating mask by Aveda. This is a great product to use a few times a week during the cold, especially if you have sensitive skin like me. Leave the mask on for 10 minutes. It will make your skin fairly sticky, which is why you’re supposed to wash it off!

SCENE

THE START OF SOMETHING NEW

Pride Leadership Cycle 7 starts the Family Pride Network

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PHOTOS | RAY LAVOIE

THE COMPLETION OF A GOAL

PHOTOS | IRA GRAHAM II

Graduation Luncheon for Pride Leadership Cycle 7

INCREASING PRIDE: Be a Pride Leader

PRIDE LEADERSHIP is an intense 8-month training program designed to prepare participants to service on nonprofit boards in an effort to bring more LGBTQ people into leadership positions throughout Central Ohio.

Cycle 8 Recruitment Reception D: Wednesday, January 14 T: 5:30 p.m. - 7:00 p.m.

L: Barley’s Brewing Company, 467 N. High Street Applications for Cycle 8 are available at: LiveUnitedCentralOhio.org Applications are due January 30.

COUPLE

Valerie Mailman & Shannon Piper

| AMY TANNENBAUM

“COLUMBUS, OHIO WAS pretty close to where we put our finger down on a map,” says Valerie, about the journey that brought her to the Midwest. Valerie was born in Queens and raised on Long Island, but in her mid-20s, her sister invited her to come along on a cross-country adventure, and on a whim, she agreed. “Once we got here, it all kind of came together.” All the things that came together included meeting Shannon, who she calls, “the love of my life.”

They met one evening in February 2011 after volunteering to interpret a performance of the Vagina Monologues at Wall Street Nightclub. They were both actually dragged to the event that evening, but as soon as they met, they hit it off right away. Valerie recalls: “I never had so much fun with someone in such a short amount of time!”

Shannon’s situation was complicated, to say the least. Born and raised in central Ohio, she came from a very conservative family. Shannon married young, had two children, Maeven and Vaeda, then several years later came out to her family and left her husband. At the time that she and Valerie met, Shannon was still married.

The night continued with dancing and laughing. “She told me she loved me the first time we hung out!” says Valerie. They went to Hounddog’s Pizza with a group after the show, where they discovered an empty bottle on a table. This inevitably turned into a game of Spin the Bottle. As Valerie and Shannon watched the bottle spin, they both recall hoping that bottle would land on the other. When it did, and they went in for the kiss, Shannon says, “it happened in slow motion, and there were fireworks!”

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They couldn’t deny their feelings any longer. A week later, they became a couple.

Valerie’s transition into motherhood happened right away. “I wasn’t sure if the kids would like me, or if I even wanted kids, but there was a complete and sudden immersion,” she says. “I was completely in love with them.” Valerie moved in a couple of months into their relationship. Everyone around her couldn’t believe how quickly she took on the role of parent — and neither could she. “It’s probably one of the greatest things I’ve ever done,” Valerie says. “If I could legally adopt them, I would.”

But complications were not behind them. Shannon was still going through the process of divorcing her husband, and they were in a bitter custody battle. To make matters worse, he didn’t approve

One day they observed Shannon’s nephew raising money for a trip to France by selling t-shirts, and they found their avenue to fund their legal fees. Valerie sketched their first design on a napkin and ordered 20 shirts with what felt like the last of their money. It was just one color, navy blue with a white print. They filled backpacks of t-shirts and walked down High Street during Pride with their girls. They sold out before the parade even began!

THERE IS A LOT OF LAUGHING AND SILLINESS IN OUR FAMILY,” SAYS VALERIE. “WE VALUE IMPORTANT THINGS, BUT WE TRY NOT TO TAKE OURSELVES TOO SERIOUSLY.

After Pride, more shirts were sold at ComFest, and Valerie was convinced that she could make the shirts herself. She bought all the equipment and materials and made it happen! Thus, Homohio — now called Local Liberations — was born. The t-shirt company now offers more than 20 designs, and they sell their shirts at festivals all over Ohio, as well as through their online store. Their designs reflect a message of equality and hope, and products and supplies are locally purchased.

With their legal battles behind them, Valerie and Shannon now focus on being together as a family, raising Maeven and Vaeda.

“There is a lot of laughing and silliness in our family,” says Valerie.

“We value important things, but we try not to take ourselves too seriously.”

“We’re both really sarcastic with the kids,” says Shannon.

“Maybe one day it’ll come back to bite us in the butt!”

Their next battle? Marriage equality. The family has appeared on two marriage billboards in Columbus this fall, as a response to an anti-equality billboard that appeared in August. Shannon and Valerie say they won’t marry until marriage equality comes to Ohio.

Looking back on overcoming court battles and building a successful business together, Valerie says, “We are a unified front, and neither of us fits into one role.” Shannon adds, “We complement each other really well, but people ask me all the time, ‘How did you end up with a Jew from New York?’”

PHOTO | AMY TANNENBAUM

of Shannon’s relationship with Valerie, and he dragged the court battle out for as long as possible. Shannon and Valerie found themselves struggling to continue fighting for the kids with a draining bank account.

TASTE BUDS

THE THURMAN CAFE: | CRAIG CHADWELL & MIKE MOFFO WHAT WAS ONCE Columbus’ dirty little secret has blossomed into Columbus’ dirty little “place to be.” Thanks to some media exposure, people have learned just how amazing the food is at The Thurman Cafe. On a Friday night, there is a wait--every single Friday. And people do wait because the food, though incredibly simple, is so very worth it. With the addition of ThurmanTo-Go at the original German Village location, as well as in Reynoldsburg, you can also take home this deliciousness quickly – avoiding the wait.

Just think burgers.

Big, fresh burgers.

Thurman doesn’t freeze their meat; everything is freshly purchased from a local butcher and served to you juicy and unaltered.

We were once told by a reliable source that they pound through over 2,500 pounds of meat weekly. Sure, they offer other things – thin pizzas, subs, salads, fries and onion rings They are all outstanding, but the burgers are the real reason that we go.

We won’t talk about the Thurmanator. No one – and we mean no one – should ever have the appetite to take that thing 32

DECEMBER 2014

on. Last we checked, the completed product weighed in at around 691 pounds. OK, no – not really, but it is absolutely huge. The Thurmanator is proof that sometimes there can be too much meat.

They offer a variety of burgers, and we have our favorites.

Taste Bud Mike most enjoys the Pepperoni Pizza burger. The spiciness of the sauce, the pepperoni and the pepper in the meat complement each other very well. Even though this thing is three-fourths a pound of meat (after cooking), the flavors marry in a way that you won’t want to stop.

Taste Bud Craig, being the heat junkie, is in love with the Salsa Burger. It is served open-faced on Texas toast and drenched in the most flavorful salsa you can imagine. Freshly sliced jalapenos finish it off with one helluva kick! Look for our glistening bald spots – you’ll know we are sharing one.

All burgers are served with potato chips. They are good, but we recommend upgrading to the combo basket (proudly named “the happy basket” by Taste Bud Craig back in the 1980s). It is a 50/50 mix of fries and onion rings. Something is different about the way they deep fry, though. We can’t say what it is, but it is delicious! We have gone to Thurman simply to split a happy basket and have a few drinks.

One other thing that the Thurman has mastered is service. It can be so busy that they can’t see their next table, but their staff doesn’t panic, and most of them have been there for more than a decade. The service is always fantastic – once you finally get to your table. We recommend asking for Kevin and playing a Prince song on the jukebox. Just be ready to be serenaded!

As is custom, we give The Thurman Cafe four greasy thumbs up way up. Now where is the number to our cardiologist?

Learn more: TheThurmanCafe.com

For more information & to schedule your private exam with our doctors,

call ( 614 ) 427-1680 now!

COLUMBUS DOCTORS

RESTORE SEX LIFE

Columbus

X $99 for a limited time!

www.columbusmensclinic.com

SEXPERT

| JOHN HENRY, JR IT IS THAT time of year again. As the temperature drops and the carefree attitude of summer seems like a distant memory, an interesting phenomenon seems to occur.

Individuals who typically enjoy being single and free begin to wish for something more. This scenario is real and has even been given a name: “Cuffing Season.”

Cuffing Season is described in the Urban Dictionary as a time “during the fall and winter months [when] people who would normally rather be single or promiscuous find themselves . . .desiring to be ‘cuffed’ or tied down by a serious relationship.” There are a number of reasons for this shift including the cold weather, prolonged indoor activities and the approaching holidays. Ultimately, loneliness sets in and many desire someone special with whom to spend their time.

While I don’t believe that this situation applies to everyone, I have certainly seen it play out and even been subject to the cuffing craze myself in the past. There truly is something about this time of year that makes many envious of their already “cuffed” friends and family members. You may find yourself in this position in the coming months, and I think it is important to keep a few things in mind as you search for a holiday hottie to take home.

First, it is important to do some self-reflection on what you are really looking for. Is this a temporary endeavor or just an ideal time to make some long-term changes?

Are you looking for a snuggle buddy until April or an actual partner? Once you have decided the level of commitment you can realistically take on, you can begin to look for someone who can meet those needs.

Second, have honest and transparent conversations with potential cuffs about what you want. No one deserves to be misled or manipulated. Everyone involved in any relationship, as always, needs to be a willing participant. It is not fair to use someone to meet your needs and disregard their needs or feelings.

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My last suggestion is to have mutually-agreed-upon ground rules. If you are exploring a temporary cuff, talk about the relationship’s shelf-life. Do not expect everyone to understand and agree to your terms, but stand strong on the things that you are not willing to change. If anything that is important enough to bring up is a deal breaker for one of you, it is not a good cuffing fit. Making false promises or maintaining unrealistic expectations will be the downfall of any healthy relationship. Do not close yourself off from possibilities because there will inevitably be growth, but always have a back-up plan.

EVERYONE INVOLVED IN ANY RELATIONSHIP, AS ALWAYS, NEEDS TO BE A WILLING PARTICIPANT. IT IS NOT FAIR TO USE SOMEONE TO MEET YOUR NEEDS AND DISREGARD THEIR NEEDS OR FEELINGS. Remember, people who find themselves in seeking a cuffing situation may have trouble with commitment, so keep your expectations in check and don’t make promises you can’t keep. In any relationship always have fun, be smart and, above all else, be safe.

INTERVIEW

Q & A with

SCRUFF’s Johnny Skandros THE SCRUFF TEAM invaded Columbus for an incredible night of fun at Axis Nightclub in early November. Quorum Columbus chatted with Johnny Skandros, the founder of SCRUFF, about the visit, his company’s impact on gay culture, how they give back to the community and what’s next for SCRUFF.

What did you most enjoy about your Columbus visit?

I loved how friendly everyone was. People weren’t hesitant to jump in front of the camera and take pictures with us, so that made it really easy to meet people. Overall, I can tell you that our team felt very welcomed, and we definitely want to come back!

Why did you choose to visit Columbus?

We chose Columbus because we heard through the grapevine that SCRUFF was extremely popular in the area. One of our new models, Kyle Kline, is a bartender at Union Cafe. I also adore Nina West. I met her in NYC during the RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 6 premiere party, and she was wearing her SCRUFF dress, so I immediately fell in love with her.

What are your favorite moments with SCRUFF? It’s great when the team gets together outside of the office for events or other social activities. Everyone works so hard, and I enjoy seeing them be able to let their hair down.

What’s new at SCRUFF? BenevolAds™ is our new in-app global advertising platform that aims to connect LGBTQ nonprofit organizations to our worldwide base of more than 7 million members. We are donating a percentage of our ad space, which will be worth 1 million dollars! Members will see BenevolAds™ in the same place that current ads are on their screen.

By tapping on the ad, they will be greeted with a popup notification with a more detailed description of the nonprofit. BenevolAds™ is really an extension of our core mission: connecting guys to one another and to the global gay community. It’s also entirely FREE. 36

DECEMBER 2014

How can a nonprofit organization get involved with BenevolAds™?

We’ve made it very simple for everyone to get involved. A nonprofit looking to reach our members can go to Scruff.Com/ Advertise and follow the steps. You must have 501(c)(3) status or have ads that we think will be relevant to our community.

How does SCRUFF encourage safer sex habits?

First and foremost, most health organizations can now use BenvolAds™ to reach and educate our members. Also, we recently partnered with the National Minority AIDS Council to educate members about HIV prevention and raise awareness about the stigma of living with HIV or AIDS. They will be using BenevolAds™ to focus on issues related to PrEP, but their messages will be tailored throughout the year to focus on events such as National Coming Out Day and World AIDS Day. Gay men have turned to mobile as the norm for meeting other like-minded men, and we’re glad to be able to educate our members around an issue that’s still of vital importance to our community.

What steps is SCRUFF taking to help protect members in anti-gay countries?

PHOTOS | G. HONAKER, VISION VIDEO PHOTOGRAPHY

We’ve struck a partnership with ILGA - International Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans and Intersex Association – the world federation of national and local organizations dedicated to achieving equal rights for LGBTI people. They publish a comprehensive website dedicated to documenting laws that criminalize same-sex acts worldwide. SCRUFF members who travel to one of the nearly 90 countries listed will be alerted via an in-app notification of the consequences of conviction under these laws. By increasing the awareness of these laws, we hope to keep our members vigilant and raise the global pressure for reform.

What has been the impact of GPS-based apps on gay dating and on LGBTQ nightlife?

Gay dating has definitely changed with the use of GPSbased apps. More than ever, gay men can feel connected to one another and to the global gay community. We’ve had dozens of marriages result from guys chatting with one another from different parts of the globe. Hearing these stories is one of the most rewarding aspects of my job. The internet changed nightlife in the same manner that newspapers once did. Gay men still want to go out and socialize face-to-face, so I don’t see nightlife going away any time soon. SCRUFF has an in-app event listing that any bar or club can utilize to feature their event to our members.

What is the next step for SCRUFF in 2015?

There are many exciting things happening for SCRUFF. We are launching SCRUFF 5 next year with more cool features. We are also planning some international SCRUFF events in London and Paris. There are some upcoming media opportunities in the works, so you might be seeing me on TV again sometime in the near future.

2014 DECEMBER

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SCENE

SCRUFF INVADES

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PHOTOS | G. HONAKER, VISION VIDEO PHOTOGRAPHY

AXIS NIGHTCLUB

CRAB RACES | KRIS LITTLER GREAT NAMES: Laurence of Crabaria, Tallula, Clawed Rains, Crab Calloway, Graham Crabber, Clair’s Hips Don’t Lie, Va-Jay-Jay, Homosexual Agenda and Hermits Have No Peer Pressure.

NOT SO GREAT NAMES: No Name, Alan, Mark, Oh, I Gotta Name It?, Lance, Itchy, Brown Mouse, Josh, Angie, Ernie UPDATE: APOCA-LOCKA-LOCKA-LIPS, our Thanksgiving event, was to die for! It was a great turnout and so much food was given away. No one expected two complete catered meals to be given away. You just never know what you’re going to get at the races, besides CRABS! UPCOMING: The Christmas Crab Race: You’re a Mean One, Mr. Pinch! will be held on Thursday, December 18.

That’s right, the bad crab of Christmas will be here to put the pinch on your holiday spirit.

FASCINATING FACT: A hermit crab changes shells every time it molts and grows larger, but crabs are known to also change shells for no reason. Crabs are on a constant mission of house hunting.

Hope to see you at the races, Local bar on Mondays at 9:30 p.m.

Exile bar on Thursdays at 9:30 p.m.

Until next time, stay crabby!

You can follow the crabs on Facebook, CRABRACINGWITHKRIS

FITNESS

STILL DON’T KNOW SQUATS? LEARN TO DO THEM WELL | MICHAEL GREENHOUSE This is the second of a two-part series detailing the essentials of the squat. See Part one in our November issue.

THE PERFECT PERFORMANCE of the squat is more important than the amount weight you can squat. If squats cannot be accomplished correctly, you will not be able to move correctly. Therefore, the chance of injury during any physical movement will increase every day you do not learn how to squat properly.

I strongly advise you to learn the squat, and learn it well. Focus on form for maximum performance and improvement, not just for workouts, but for everyday activities! Below are some helpful pointers to achieve correct squats.

A Neutral Spine Keeping your spine in a neutral position the entire time is correct form. Many coaches will tell their lifters to look up, as that is the direction in which you want to move, but this is actually the last thing you want to do. This puts emphasis on maximum knee and ankle flexion (or bending) resulting in the knees staying behind the toes, and your butt behind your heels. If you have concerns as to whether you have the structural balance for this lift, consider hiring a qualified coach in your area to evaluate you.

Raising the Bar Keep the elbows directly under the bar. Many trainees new to squatting allow their elbows to drift backward. Doing so makes it more difficult to keep the chest and head in proper alignment, which leads to undue stress on the spinal erectors. Push upwards slightly on the bar with the hands. Although pressing upward does not actually lift the barbell, it allows you to engage the spinal erectors to a greater degree, which helps maintain an upright posture and a neutral spine.

No Buckling If improper form is a consistent issue during your training, you should lower the training load, learn to squat right and focus on letting your knees track straight over the shoes, all the way forward! No buckling in and no pushing out. These moves are just as bad as pushing the knees outward.

Stabilize the Back Avoid performing a back extension during the upward concentric phase of the squat. Extending the back is an indication of technical failure and means structural imbalance or lack of flexibility is hindering your ability to correctly perform a back squat. Remember, the prime movers of this exercise are the quadriceps, not the spinal erectors, keeping the back stabilized.

Increased Force The less hip flexion, the better. Every inch forward that your knee bends, you increase the sheer force at the area of L4-L5 lumbar vertebrae by an average of 50 pounds. This figure increases exponentially as your ability to move more weight improves. Although there are useful derivations of the squat that train the spinal erectors more intensely, the goal of the basic squat is to maintain an ideal, neutral posture.

2014 DECEMBER

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DOWNTOWN ITALIAN VILLAGE CLINTONVILLE

OLD NORTH COLUMBUS

DRINK.

DANCE.

4 Club 20 Old North Columbus 20 E Duncan Ave 614.261.9111 8 Exile Italian Village 893 N 4th St 614.299.0069 10 Wine on High Short North 789 N High St 614. 294.8466 13 Local Bar Short North 913 N High St 614.670.8958 14 Slammers Downtown 202 E Long St 614.221.8880

2 Axis Short North 775 N High St 614.291.4008 22 Wall Street Night Club Downtown 144 N Wall St 614.464.2800

EAT + DRINK. 11 12 21 23 25

La Fogata Grill Short North 790 N High St 614.294.7656 Level Dining Lounge Short North 700 N High St 614.754.7111 Union Short North 782 N High St 614.421.2233 MOUTON Short North 954 N High St 614.732.4660 Cray Eatery & Drinkery Italian Village 697 N 4th St 614.745.1693

SHOP. 9 The Garden Short North 1186 N High St 614.294.2869 18 Torso Short North 772 N High St 614.421.7663 19 Torso (in Exile) Italian Village 893 N 4th St 614.299.0069

ENGAGE. 5 ARC OHIO Clintonville 4400 N High St 614.299.2437 24 ARC OHIO Medical Ctr + Pharmacy Short North 1033 N High St 16 Stonewall Columbus Short North 1160 N High St 614.299.7764

MERION VILLAGE

BREWERY DISTRICT SOUTH SIDE OLDE TOWNE EAST

EAT + DRINK. DRINK. 3 6 7 15 17 20

24 Explorers Club Merion Village 1586 S High St 614.725.0155

Cavan Irish Pub Merion Village 1409 S High St 614.725.5502 Club Diversity Brewery District 863 S High St 614.224.4050 Columbus Fuel Bar Merion Village 1312 S High St 614.725.0130 South Bend Merion Village 126 E. Moler St 614.444.3386 The Toolbox Saloon South Side 744 Frebis Ave 614.670.8113 Tremont Brewery District 708 S High St 614.445.9365

DRINK + DANCE. 1 A.W.O.L. Bar + The Barracks Olde Towne East 49 Parsons Ave 614.621.8779

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MUNITY RESOURCES

LOCAL & STATE ORGANIZATIONS

NATIONAL ORGANIZATIONS

Stonewall Columbus 614-299-7764 www.stonewallcolumbus.org This local community and resource center serves the Central Ohio LGBTQ community by providing programs and services that enhance the well-being and visibility of a diverse

GLAAD www.glaad.org A national organization that promotes fair, accurate, and inclusive media representations of LGBTQ people. as a means of challenging discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity.

Additionally, Stonewall Columbus hosts the annual Pride Holiday.

Human Rights Campaign www.hrc.com The nation’s largest gay and lesbian political organization.

ARC Ohio 800-252-0827 www.arcohio.org Fights the spread of HIV, works towards reducing its transmission, stigma and the resulting discrimination through education and awareness, and provides quality services to BRAD (Buckeye Alliance of the Deaf ) membership@gmail.com www.bradohio.com Protects and promotes the interests and well-being of deaf and hard of hearing LGBTQ people while increasing awareness about the needs of Deaf and hard of hearing community.

BRAVO (Buckeye Region Anti-Violence Organization) 614-294-STOP www.bravo-ohio.org Works to eliminate violence perpetuated on the basis of prevention, advocacy, violence documentation and survivor services.

Equality Ohio 614-224-0400 www.equalityohio.org A statewide lobbying organization working to secure equality for LGBT Ohioans.

FreedomOhio 614-246-3807 www.freedomohio.com The Freedom to Marry Ohio movement is dedicated to ending marriage discrimination in Ohio.

Kaleidoscope Youth Center 614-294-5437 www.kycohio.org Provides advocacy, education, support and a safe environment for LGBT youth in Central Ohio.

P-FLAG Columbus 614-806-8025 awareness and understanding for Central Ohio’s LGBT citizens and our families, friends and allies.

Rainbow Sisters www.rainbowsisters.info A social and community-oriented group for lesbian women age 40 and over.

NGLTF www.thetaskforce.org The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force is a leading progressive civil rights organization that has supported grassroots organizing since 1973.

The National Coalition for LGBT Youth www.outproud.org A wide range of resources available for youth and educators.

ARTS & MUSIC Capital Pride Band of Columbus 614-325-1590 www.cappride.org A statewide LGBTQ organization of instrumentalists promoting the joy of music, friendship, and personal growth.

They provide a variety of performances each year.

Columbus Gay Men’s Chorus 614-228-2462 www.cgmc.com Singing out since 1990, this chorus presents a series of concerts each year. Open auditions held prior to rehearsal for each show.

Evolution Theatre Company 614-233-1124 www.evolutiontheatre.org A semi-professional theatre company that presents musicals, dramas and comedies that have not been seen in the area well as new works and world premieres.

Imagine Productions 614-398-1110 www.imaginecolumbus.com entertaining and educating community stakeholders. They recognize that empowerment and growth occurs for both the audience and performer.

Wexner Center for the Arts 614-292-3535 www.wexarts.org Internationally known contemporary arts center at OSU, programs, as well as a store and a café all under one roof in an architectural landmark.

COUNSELING

Sisters of Lavender

614-445-8277

A social/support for women 40 and over. S.O.L. is the oldest lesbian organization in Columbus.

A center for psychotherapy and growth with a long history of working with LGBTQ clients.

TransOhio 614-441-8167 www.transohio.org Serves the Ohio transgender and allied communities by providing services, education, support and advocacy.

Randi Cohen, LPCC-S 614-267-1993 www.randicohen.com Helping adult clients to create a strong sense of self, learn good communication skills, and gain a clearer sense of how others see you.

Why Marriage Matters Ohio www.whymarriagemattersoh.org A marriage equality education campaign supporting the right for any loving, committed Ohio couple to marry.

Shawn D. King, PhD., LISW 614-655-3554 www.shawnkingphd.com Providing individual, family, and group counseling services to the LGBTQ community. Specializing in relationship issues, anger management and mental health services.

HEALTH & WELLNESS AHF Wellness Center & Out of the Closet Pharmacy: 614-732-5947 Wellness Center: 614-223-1532 www.aidshealth.org The AIDS Healthcare Foundation (AHF) operates Out of the full-service pharmacy, and HIV testing at the corner of N. High St., Suite 350.

CHOICES 614-224-4663 www.choicescolumbus.org Since 1977 they have provided counseling, shelter, crisis intervention, education and community and legal support and advocacy to central Ohio residents facing domestic violence.

Columbus Public Health LGBTQ Health Initiative 614-645-1493 www.publichealth.columbus.gov As part of the department’s mission to protect health and cultural competency trainings to health care and other service providers. Additionally, their LGBTQ Health Advocate manages The Crystal Club 614-214-4828 www.thecrystalclub.org female impersonators, and other transgender individuals.

Huckleberry House 614-294-5553 www.huckhouse.org Established in 1970 to provide a safe place for runaway youth homeless or runaways.

NetCare 614-276-CARE www.netcareaccess.org Provides 24 hour mental health and substance abuse crisis intervention, stabilization and assessment for Franklin County Planned Parenthood of Central Ohio, Inc. 614-224-2235 www.plannedparenthood.org The nation's oldest and largest sexual and reproductive health care organization.

Trevor Project 866-4U-TREVOR www.thetrevorproject.org Determined to end suicide among LGBT youth by providing nationwide, 24/7 crisis intervention lifeline.

ADJOURN

| AMY ELDRIDGE ‘TIS THE SEASON for gratitude and giving. It is so easy to get lost in the concerns and overwhelming to-do lists of the day that I sometimes forget to pay attention to the wonders in my life and to what really matters. Life is full of gifts, and it is only when we practice gratitude that we can truly receive the gifts in our life.

THE GIFT OF GIVING

One of the most powerful gifts of all is when we are aware that we impact others in a positive way. I love hearing from youth, volunteers and staff about how much more they get back than give up through their service to others. Youth engage in opportunities to educate others, carry out programming and create an atmosphere full of fun, recreation and laughter. As executive director of Kaleidoscope Youth Center (KYC), it is a gift to be serving LGBTQIA youth every day.

If you ask the youth who participate in our activities about their KYC experience, you’ll hear about comfort, community and the ability to fully be and fully express themselves. They are likely to mention the center’s welcoming environment, where they get a break from rude questions about their sexual orientation or gender identity. They will note the importance of resources, such as a computer center for doing homework and job searching. The youth see KYC as a place where people understand them. The themes of KYC being a home and a family come up in every discussion I’ve had with youth about what matters most about the KYC experience. Of course, they also mention the food and fun the center offers!

There is so much fun going on at Kaleidoscope. From my third floor office, I hear the youth engaged in games and recreation, art projects, performances, book clubs, meals and food preparation, dancing, singing and discussion groups. When I join them in the center or at the Other Prom, the Columbus Pride events or on a field trip to Lazer Kraze, their energy, joy and gratitude are contagious.

The fun is so contagious that participation is skyrocketing. This fall the number of visits to the center nearly quadrupled visits at this time last year. This unprecedented growth means up to four times as many bus passes, groceries, supplies, volunteers and emergency resources are needed to operate the center. We are seeing similar increases in the need for crisis support and intervention, as well as for material assistance, such as winter coats and accessories, hygiene supplies and other basic needs.

Unfortunately, not all of our work involves having fun. LGBTQIA youth face a range of issues including housing insecurity and homelessness, bullying and harassment, family rejection or difficulties, poverty, racism, transphobia, homophobia, bi-phobia, ableism, unhealthy relationships, HIV and STIs, loneliness and isolation, suicidality, self-harm and mental health issues.

This year we are celebrating 20 years of Kaleidoscope offering LGBTQIA youth a safe space and caring community of peers and adult mentors, referrals, educational opportunities, discussions about healthy relationships, HIV and STI prevention/testing and social events. One youth said that LGBTQIA youth “need somewhere to feel safe, loved and happy, and KYC is the place to do it! Here, you can fully be yourself.”

KYC is also working to create safe and empowering spaces in schools. Our Gay-Straight Alliance (GSA) Network reaches out to students and staff in schools across central Ohio to support GSA club development and activism. Students and staff are provided support, training and resources, and then they give back to each other through KYC’s GSA Network, becoming trainers, and sharing challenges, successes and best practices.

Amy Eldridge has served as the executive director of Kaleidoscope Youth Center for three years. She graduated from OSU and lives in Eastmoor. Amy was introduced to nonprofit work, lots of lesbians and activism in the 1980s. Amy cut her activist teeth at the feminist collective, Women Against Rape. She worked as The Columbus Foundation’s grants coordinator before leaving to parent two children and start CORI Care, a business providing supportive living and ancillary services for people with developmental disabilities, which she co-owned with her former wife.

Working at Kaleidoscope marks a return to her nonprofit organization roots.

Giving any way that you can is such a gift. The young people of KYC are grateful for the gifts from our community, and they give back generously in return. If you haven’t already, please join us! The return on investment of time, money, material goods and kindness is the gift of a positive and loving impact on others and ourselves that is beyond what most of us can imagine.

Learn more: KYCOhio.Org

2014 DECEMBER

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614-594-0230