Foster Care Fortnight runs between 12 and 25 May, and this year’s theme is the power of relationships – because at the heart of every fostering journey are the connections that make all the difference. And relationships are the focus of this newsletter.
Relationships are central to everything we do at Quarriers Fostering Service. Relationships with foster carers, relationships with children and young people, relationships with social workers – all these foster a nurturing, loving and supportive environment for the children and young people who we care for.
In this newsletter we look at the relationship between a foster mother and child’s birth families in A Foster Mother’s Story. Through our picture-profiles of the various fun days out – including Drumlanrig Castle and Blair Drummond Safari Park – you can see families, social workers and children having a fabulous time in the sunshine.
You will also meet Jack, Lorna and Jim on a short break to a caravan in Dumfries and Galloway. Judging by the smile on Jack’s face, his relationship with Lorna and Jim has developed to a point where Jack feels safe and secure in their company.
At Christmas, Razia, Linzie and Heather met with social workers to make Christmas wreaths. When foster carers come together, they build relationships, get to know each other, and offer each other valuable peer support. It is these sorts of relationships that give the people we support some much-needed time out.
Creating and maintaining safe, equal and collaborative relationships is key to any community, and in this newsletter, we look at the organisations’ work on trauma and
Relationships are central to everything we do at Quarriers Fostering Service.
Rachel, Service Manager
trauma-informed practice and what they mean for foster carers.
We finish off by meeting the team and panel and welcoming new team members Natalie and Suzanne. In addition, we say a fond farewell to Colette – who has retired – and Helen, who’s moved on to pastures new.
There’s also a message from our Chief Executive, Dr Ron Culley, who talks about a chance encounter he had recently at Quarriers Village.
The relationships between the team, the panel and the foster carers are critical to providing an exemplary level of care and I am proud to be part of the scaffolding that Ron talks about in his message.
We continue to work closely with partner agencies to build on existing relationships and are actively seeking new placements. (continued overleaf)
Colette’s fostering journey
Colette never imagined herself as a foster carer. She was playing with her grandchildren in the garden one day when her neighbour, who fostered children with additional support needs, called over the fence and said, “You’d be good at my job.”
“The idea of looking after someone’s most treasured thing scared me. It’s a huge responsibility,” Colette admits. But that conversation planted a seed.
A year and a half later, after going through the fostering approval process, Colette welcomed two-and-a-half-year-old Ashley into her home for short breaks. “She’s 27 now, and she’s like a granddaughter to me.”
The ups and downs
The fostering process can feel intense, and Colette found the approval process invasive at times. “You have to remember not to take it personally: it’s about making sure you’re the right fit.” But once Ashley arrived, the rewards quickly outweighed the challenges.
Colette’s granddaughters would try new activities, and Ashley, watching them, felt encouraged to give things a go, too. “They had great fun together. Ashley just became part of the family.”
The early days with a new child can be tough. “They don’t know you, and they’re scared. That’s the hardest stage for me. You’re trying to build trust, and it takes time. But when they settle in, feel safe, and start acting like one of the family, that’s the best part. I always say, ‘I’m not their nana, I’m their spare nana.’”
Colette
When they settle in, feel safe, and start acting like one of the family, that’s the best part. I always say, ‘I’m not their nana, I’m their spare nana.’
Colette
Feeling supported
One of the biggest sources of encouragement on Colette’s journey has been Quarriers. “The training you receive is endless, both before you start and throughout your fostering journey. I’ve done so many courses, and I always learn something new.”
From first aid to tube feeding, from sign language to advocacy training, Colette has embraced learning to give the best possible care to the children who stay with her. “I have about four folders of certificates from courses I’ve completed! You never stop learning, and Quarriers is always there with training and support when you need it.”
Beyond training, Quarriers is also a lifeline for foster carers when challenges arise. “If there’s ever an issue, they deal with it. If my social worker doesn’t have the answer, they’ll find out. You never feel alone.”
Becoming family
Over the years, many children have come through Colette’s door. “Every child I’ve looked after has been treated just like my grandchildren. The boundaries are the same, the care is the same.” Some still keep in touch, even as adults. “One lad, who must be nearly 30 now, phones me every week, and we go for lunch.”
The experience has also had a positive impact on her family. “My grandchildren have grown up with a greater understanding of disabilities. It’s given them empathy and patience.”
Advice for potential foster carers
So, what does it take to be a foster carer for children with additional support needs?
“A lot of patience, a caring nature, and a sense of humour,” Colette laughs. “It’s not easy at first, it takes time. But once they’re comfortable, the hard part is over.”
For Colette, fostering has never felt like a job. “I always joke that I get paid to play with children! But the truth is, it’s been one of the most rewarding things I’ve ever done.”
And the best part? “When parents get in touch to say thank you. Knowing they had a muchneeded break, knowing their child was safe and happy, that’s what makes you want to keep doing it.”
If you’ve ever thought about fostering, Colette’s advice is simple: take the first step, you never know where it might lead.
I always joke that I get paid to play with children! But the truth is, it’s been one of the most rewarding things I’ve ever done. Colette
A fond farewell: Colette’s retirement
Quarriers would like to extend its deepest gratitude to Colette for her years of selfless dedication through fostering. Her care, kindness and unwavering support have changed the lives of so many children and their families.
After more than two decades of fostering, Colette has decided it’s time to retire from offering short breaks. This decision was influenced by both personal circumstances and a promise she made to her mother.
“My mum was very ill, and when she was able to leave the hospital, I moved in with her so that I could care for her.”
Colette has spent her life caring for others: her aunt, her father, her mother, her children, her grandchildren, and the many foster children who have come through her door. But during one of those heartfelt moments with her mum, she was reminded to take time for herself.
“She made me promise to stop working and enjoy my life, just like she and my dad did when he took early retirement. So, I’m keeping that promise. My husband and I are taking a couple of years for ourselves. We’re going to travel, sell up, and buy a smaller house. The plan is to spend six months in one place, so the family can visit us on holiday.”
Colette also had a moment that made her think twice about continuing. “I’m 67 now, and some of the children that come to me are young and fast. I always hold their hand when we’re out. One day, a child tried to run, and I just managed to catch him. But it made me wonder, what if I wasn’t quick enough next time?” (continued overleaf)
Safari park outing
As you can see, everyone had a wonderful day when we visited Blair Drummond Safari Park to celebrate Foster Care Fortnight.
Foster Care Fortnight
Jack has been visiting Lorna and Jim for short breaks since 2021. Every month, he goes to Lorna and Jim’s for a weekend.
However, one weekend Lorna and Jim surprised Jack with a stay in a caravan at Southerness. Jack had a fun-filled break and fit in lots of different activities. He particularly enjoyed going to the swimming pool, which had a pirate ship with water cannons: he really loved squirting the water at Jim and giggled as he did so!
He also enjoyed playing pool and going out for dinner, but most of all, he loved having a cup of tea with his feet up on the decking and enjoying the view.
Jack likes to feel included and really enjoys helping. Doing little jobs to do around the house makes him feel involved, and he likes having some responsibilities and receiving praise for a job well done.
As Jack has got to know Lorna and Jack very well, he feels safe when he is with them. Jack likes being busy and is always very eager to learn new things, and Lorna and Jim always have ideas for new experiences he can enjoy.
Keeping the Promise
The following case study, ‘A foster mother’s story’, illustrates the transformative impact of prioritising love, compassion and relationships between fostering and birth families. It reflects the heart of Keeping the Promise, placing relationships and the needs of the child at the centre, and supporting families in ways that are respectful and meaningful.
When a foster mother first entered the life of her son, she recognised a vital truth: every member of his birth family had already experienced deep trauma. From the beginning, she made a conscious decision that her presence in their lives would not add to that pain. Instead, she chose to lead with kindness and empathy, avoiding any suggestion of authority or judgement.
Understanding the emotional weight of both getting to know her son and in meeting his birth family, she worked hard to separate the two, recognising that the child’s story was interwoven with others who also deserved compassion.
When she met his birth mother, her immediate feeling wasn’t judgment but sorrow, that this young woman, too, hadn’t received the care and support she clearly needed. This moment reflected a deep human understanding: that vulnerability exists on all sides, and support shouldn’t stop at the child.
The paternal grandmother, known to be strongwilled and central to the family dynamic, was initially a source of apprehension. But that fear quickly gave way to connection. Over coffee, an offhand remark - “You’re just like me: a straight talker” - set the tone for an open and honest relationship rooted in mutual respect.
Initially, communication was through Social Work, limited to infrequent emails and structured updates. However, recognising the connection made through their previous conversations and the warmth that was
naturally developing, the foster mother advocated for direct contact. Once granted, the relationship flourished.
What followed was a mutual connection: frequent emails, shared stories, support during bereavement and illness, and even gifts for one another’s families. Contact visits, once daunting, became joyful occasions filled with laughter, storytelling and shared pride in the little boy they all cared for.
The foster mother was intentional about maintaining openness, making sure the grandmother felt included, heard and respected. Her guiding principle was that no matter how complicated the situation, there would always be love in the room when they were together.
This story powerfully illustrates several core elements of keeping the Promise.
Relationships matter most, for this foster mother recognised that a child’s sense of belonging is strengthened, not threatened, by loving connections with their birth family. Choosing love and compassion over judgement or control ensured that everyone involved felt safe, valued and included. By inviting the grandmother’s voice into decisions and valuing her perspective, the foster mother honoured the importance of lived experience and relational continuity. Through shared commitment, vulnerability and joy, these two families became united.
This is a profound example of what happens when adults put aside systems and formalities and instead choose to build genuine, lasting relationships. By leading with love and honouring everyone’s role in the child’s life, this family has shown what keeping the Promise looks and feels like in a world where children grow up feeling connected, loved and supported by everyone who holds them dear.
A foster mother’s story
I felt very strongly from early on that my priority in engaging with our son’s birth family was to be loving, kind and compassionate.
Both sides of his birth family had experienced enough trauma without me being another adult swooping in from a place of authority to disrupt their lives more than they already had been. It can be hard to separate the paperwork you receive about the child you care for from the situation of meeting their birth family, to hold your protective emotions in check. For me, when I met his birth mum, I had an overwhelming pang that I hadn’t been able to foster her too. Any hint of questioning the situation that had led us both to meet was never there, only a sadness that we weren’t able to help this vulnerable girl, too.
Our son comes from a strong-willed paternal grandmother. I was most nervous to meet her knowing she would be the driving force of our quarterly contact. We chatted at a coffee shop for our first meeting and very quickly she said, “You are just like me. A straight talker.” and I knew we were off on the right tone.
Our conversations were, for a long time, diverted through Social Work. We were advised to keep photos to one email in between each contact. The problem with this is that granny and I are both blethers! And we love sharing and chatting about our little boy. Social Work suggested that we have direct email contact and since then we chat frequently. We share a lot about our families, holidays, days out, hospital appointments and our lives. We have emailed supportive messages through bereavement and illness on both sides. She buys gifts for our biological children and is kind and gracious in every email, contact and meeting.
Because of all of this we have found building a strong relationship easy. I was determined we would and made sure that when she asked for certain information once that I would continue to keep her in the loop. I make sure I include her in conversations and ask for her opinion. We spend the two hours of contact laughing
and chatting and catching up on each other's lives and her telling me stories about when her sons were young.
I am mindful of my place with both sides of his birth family and how easily I could make them feel upset or uncomfortable. I try to always be a positive voice and a cheerful, kind face of what is an intensely difficult situation for a family to find themselves in.
Thankfully contact now feels like hanging out with family. We are family. We are forever bonded by our love for this amazing little boy who brought our families together and my role in that is to make sure there is nothing but love in the room when we are all together.
We are family. We are forever bonded by our love for this amazing little boy who brought our families together. Foster mother
Meet the team
Rachel Sawyer Service Manager rachel.sawyer@quarriers.org.uk
Holly Carlton Supervising Social Worker holly.carlton@quarriers.org.uk
Tricia McHugh Supervising Social Worker patricia.mchugh@quarriers.org.uk
Alana Perry Supervising Social Worker alana.perry@quarriers.org.uk
Meghan Travers Supervising Social Worker meghan.travers@quarriers.org.uk
Suzanne Gallagher Supervising Social Worker suzanne.gallagher@quarriers.org.uk
Kirsty Henderson Panel Support Assistant kirsty.henderson@quarriers.org.uk
Nicole Docherty Supervising Social Worker nicole.docherty@quarriers.org.uk
Ruth Newman Supervising Social Worker ruth.newman@quarriers.org.uk
Floyd Robinson Supervising Social Worker floyd.robinson@quarriers.org.uk
Nat Warner Social Work Assistant natalie.warner@quarriers.org.uk
Meet the Fostering Panel
Elspeth Soutar • Panel Chair
Elspeth has an extensive background in Social Work with children and families and fostering and adoption. Her early training in person-centred support of others and her mindfulness practice are inscribed into every ring of her tree of life and have shaped her career.
Elspeth has been able to extensively deepen her knowledge of trauma-informed practices, adverse childhood experiences and attachment theory as a certified DDP practitioner while working long term in multi-disciplinary teams. She moved to independent practice as an ISW and Mindfulness Teacher in 2020 and brings this experience to fostering and shared lives panels, capacity assessments and expert witness work for the legal system.
Elspeth lives on water and loves to slow life down with a good book, a long walk and a jolly up the canal on her boat. She has launched Scotland’s first floating therapy room boat, which she shares with local therapists, meditators and artists to provide a healing space in a non-clinical setting.
Janice MacKay • Independent Panel Member and Co-Chair
Janice is an Independent Social Worker who has worked in a number of social work environments over the last 24 years.
Her most recent post was as a Manager of a Fostering Team in the voluntary/charitable sector, where she worked for eight years. Prior to this, she worked in the Fostering and Adoption Team in two local authorities, and in Child Protection teams. This variety of working environments has provided her with a sound knowledge in these areas of practice, and brings these skills to the Quarriers Fostering and Shared Lives Panel.
Scott Robertson• Independent Panel Member
Scott worked with Quarriers for 22 years overseeing a number of our Glasgow Youth Homelessness services and an acquired brain injury service. Scott is a qualified social worker and previously worked within local authority housing and social work environments.
Scott’s particular areas of experience relate to homelessness and care experienced young people. He has a passion for promoting social justice and enabling people to overcome a range of social barriers.
Scott recently retired and focuses on his role as an independent panel member for the Fostering service. Outside of this, Scott enjoys going to concerts, current affairs and both watching and playing football.
Team updates
Welcome Nat Warner
Nat started in post as a Social Work Assistant, supporting carers in Dumfries and Galloway.
“I started as a social work student on placement back in September 2024 and thoroughly enjoyed my time at the Fostering Service. I was able to take on a temporary contract continuing my work and I’m glad to be back! Outwith Quarriers, I have just finished my Social Work degree and also work with the justice team in my local council. Two very different roles, but both equally rewarding!”
Welcome Suzanne Gallagher
“Hello everyone. I am delighted to be joining Quarriers Family Placement and Shared Lives Project as a Supervising Social Worker. I would like to briefly introduce myself.
“I qualified as a Social Worker in 1998. I have 17 years social work experience as a local authority social worker in the areas of child protection, older people’s services and adult protection. I have experience of supporting carers and ensuring high standards of care for children and adults. For the past 8 years I have worked in primary and secondary schools as a Learning Support worker to help children and young people access education and succeed in school by building trusting, nurturing relationships. I have post qualifying certificates in Counselling Skills; Dementia Studies and in The Theory and Practice of Nurture. I am also mum to three teenagers, with personal experience of caring for a child with autism.
I am excited to be joining the Team and hope to meet you soon.”
