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Utah’s News & Entertainment Magazine for the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Community | FREE

salt lake Issue 172 January 20, 2011

A Call for Civility

Westboro ‘Church’ Ogden Moves One to Picket Sundance Step Closer

Reichen Riled by Reality Show


An EvEning with

n e H P e St m i e H d Son An onstage conversation with legendary

composer and lyricist Stephen Sondheim and former Salt Lake Tribune theatre critic nancy Melich.

February 1 | 7:30 pm Tickets: 801-581-7100 | Tickets starting at $20.50 Photo by Jerry Jackson

U of U Discounts Available


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SOME OTHER VICTORIES INCLUDE:  Worked closely with the Obama administration to extend hospital visitation rights for LGBT couples.

 Led the campaign to oust bigoted Arkansas school board member Clint McCance.

 Fought to bring marriage equality across the country. Led the effort to enact marriage equality in Washington, D.C., and organized the key religious voices in support of marriage.

 Launched an innovative program to empower transgender job seekers who are unemployed or underemployed by providing essential skills training to make the most of the job market.

 Launched a campaign to work to pass marriage equality legislation in New York and helped elect three new voices for marriage in the state Senate.  Launched to hold the National Organization for Marriage accountable for the misinformation and hate spread in its effort to thwart equality.  Developed the Countdown 2010 Grassroots Campaign calling for a fair and inclusive ENDA.


 Deployed 39 staff to 17 states to work for pro-equality candidates and recruited more than 4,500 volunteers to support these candidates.  HRC’s Corporate Equality Index expanded with 337 employers reaching 100 percent scores, the most ever.  Signed 50 adoption agencies across the country to implement LGBT-inclusive policies and practices.  HRC is only LGBT national partner organization to join the national non-partisan citizenship and voter registration program Ya Es Hora. HRC mobilized more than 500 volunteers for 40 citizenship workshops in 20 communities.

 Led the call for Mormon leader Boyd Packer to renounce his discriminatory, homophobic remarks.  Worked with the Joint Commission, which accredits most hospitals, to establish LGBT-specific accreditation standards to eliminate discriminatory policies in healthcare facilities.  In response to high profile anti-LGBT bullying and youth suicides, launched a new website to help address bullying in elementary schools.

 Formalized a partnership with National Education Association (NEA) to extend the reach of HRC’s Welcoming Schools program.  Successfully lobbied the Obama administration to issue guidance permitting employees to take federal family and medical leave to care for a same-sex partner’s child and extending federal domestic violence protections to include victims in same-sex relationships.















Q staff

publisher/editor  Michael Aaron

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assistant editor  JoSelle Vanderhooft arts & entertainment editor  Tony Hobday graphic designer  Christian Allred contributors  Chris Azzopardi, Lynn

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First Person

from the editor Another call for civility by Michael Aaron


alt Lake City Mayor Ralph Becker and Utah Lt. Governor Greg Bell recently held a press conference at Memorial House to launch an initiative on civility (see related story on page 10). Days later, a troubled young man went on a shooting spree in Phoenix, killing many and ruining the lives of many others. Leaders across the country began calling for a toning down of the political rhetoric that drives Grand Canyon-sized wedges between us, calling such a tragic event “inevitable” in the current political fire storm. As the seconds tick by and memories begin to fade, however, the new majority party in the U.S. House of Representatives puffs its chest and is trying to beat down the health care bill as nothing more than a symbol of the “new sheriff in town.” The repeal has no chance of getting past the threshold of the Senate chambers, but that won’t stop them from slapping the left around a bit before moving on to what Rep. Jim Matheson calls the “real work of the Congress” perhaps next week. If we think such tragic events are just “somewhere else” than Utah, we would be mistaken. Utah has its own Jared Lee Loughners with itchy trigger fingers. I’m sure all states have at least one. But it’s more than just about tipping the mentally unstable over the edge. It’s also about

the ability of our nation to rise about schoolyard rhetoric and have serious conversations about serious issues in a controlled, measured manner. A few months ago, back when it was nice and warm, I used this space to call for our community to be better to one another. Today, even as Fred Phelps and his ilk from Westboro Baptist Church are purchasing their bus tickets to our pretty, great state to spew their “God Hates Fags” venom, and Sen. Chris Buttars is using a recent Utah Eagle Forum conference to sharpen his tongue, I am calling for our community to be better to those with whom we disagree. Yes, I know that those who disagree with us are like the schoolyard bullies we grew up with, using words like “evil” and “immoral” against us and belittling our innate nature by labeling us as having “same-gender attraction issues.” They use fraudulent science to show how “bad” we are. They falsify documents to hide their involvement in organizations that spread falsehoods and outright lies during political campaigns. But if we rise to the bait and return the same fire they throw at us, are we any better than them? By calling them names, exaggerating their statements and labeling them as bigots or hate-mongers, are we not lowering ourselves to their level?

I would rather earn my rights honorably so that when they come, and they will, I can hold my head high and proudly say that we were on the right side of history and we conducted ourselves with dignity. So, I will begin by reflecting on my tone that I have set and the tone I will set in the future. I hope my fellow leaders will do the same. I will use this column, this newspaper and my other comments to share my belief that it is necessary to treat everyone with the respect I hope that they would treat me and my community. I will engage in setting this tone in my workplace, in my house and with my friends. I will take action when I see those around me treat others in negative ways. I will also solicit contributions from our readers on other ideas to ensure that the debate we are having over our inalienable rights is respectful. I also ask that if you see me or others who grace these pages who are not living up to this call, that you set us straight (gaily forward?). I just ask that you do it respectfully. Respectfully, Michael Aaron

J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 5

national news

Quips & Quotes

by Rex Wockner

Justice Department appeals rulings that struck down DOMA


It’s a really restrictive environment here. And there’s still a need. People are hurting. People are killing themselves. And people are getting bullied.” — David Andrews, a volunteer for the Empathy Line, explaining the need for such a service to Fox 13 News

HRC to Obama: Support same-sex marriage now The Human Rights Campaign called on President Barack Obama Jan. 13 to abandon his opposition to same-sex marriage. Obama has said he supports civil unions for gays but thinks marriage is for straight couples. But he also has said his thinking on the issue is “evolving” and “it’s pretty clear where the trendlines are going.” As such, “it’s time for him to help lead the American public toward full equality for all Americans,” said HRC President Joe Solmonese. “We ask him to fully recognize the dignity of LGBT Americans and their families by supporting marriage equality.” Solmonese’s exhortation came as the Justice Department appealed two federal court rulings from last July that struck down as unconstitutional the part of the Defense of Marriage Act that prevents the federal government from recognizing states’ same-sex marriages. The section states: “In determining the meaning of any Act of Congress, or of any ruling, regulation, or interpretation of the various administrative bureaus and agencies of the United States, the word ‘marriage’ means only a legal union between one man and one woman as husband and wife, and the word ‘spouse’ refers only to a person of the opposite sex who is a husband or a wife.” (The other section, which gives states cover to refuse to recognize other states’ same-sex marriages, was not targeted in the lawsuits.) The administration has said it has a duty to defend U.S. laws — including those such as DOMA that the president opposes. HRC disputed that claim and urged the Justice Department to “at the very least ... acknowledge that (DOMA) is unconstitutional.” In its appeal to the 1st U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals, the government argues: “ ... DOMA is rationally related to legitimate governmental interests. Congress passed DOMA in 1996, at a time when states and their citizens were just beginning to address the issue of marriage rights for same-sex couples. Since that time, some states have enacted statutes or issued court decisions that permit same-sex couples to marry, and other states have promulgated statutes or constitutional amendments that define marriage as between a man and a woman. Other states do not allow same-sex couples to marry under their own laws, but nonetheless recognize same-sex marriages from other states. DOMA, which implicates over 1000 federal laws, reflects Congress’s reasonable response to this stillevolving debate among the states regarding same-sex marriage. The Constitution permitted Congress to enact DOMA as a means to preserve the status quo, ensure consistency


I think that will probably be a great resource for kids.” — Gay high school student Jordan Despain talking to The Salt Lake Tribune about the phone line


Former NBA MVP Charles Barkley spoke out against anti-gay discrimination before the Celtics-Magic game during a tribute to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. “You know, people try to make it about black and white. He talked about equality for every man, every woman. We have a thing going on now — people discriminating against homosexuality in this country. I love the homosexual people. God bless the gay people. They are great people,” he said. During a brief stint in politics in 2006, he advocated for same-sex marriage and acceptance of a potential gay player in professional sports. in the distribution of federal marriage-based benefits, and respect policy developments in the states without implicating other states or the United States, pending the resolution of the debate taking place in the states over whether to permit same-sex marriage.” In striking down DOMA, the federal District Court in Boston ruled that it violates the Due Process Clause of the Fifth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution by treating married gay couples differently from married straight couples without any rational basis for doing so, violates the 10th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution by intruding in areas of exclusive state authority, and violates the Spending Clause in Article 1 of the Constitution by forcing Massachusetts to discriminate against its married gay citizens in order to receive certain types of federal funding. The government’s appeal disputes all three determinations. In 1996, when Obama was running for the Illinois Senate, he told the Chicago gay newspaper Windy City Times that he favored legalizing same-sex marriage, but since that time he has expressed support only for civil unions for same-sex couples. Very recently, however, he has suggested that his feelings on the matter may be in flux. In December, he told The Advocate: “My attitudes are evolving on this. I have always firmly believed in having a robust civil union that provides the rights and benefits under the law that marriage does. I’ve wrestled with the fact that marriage traditionally has had a different connotation. But I also have a lot of very close friends who are married gay or lesbian couples. And squaring that circle is something that I have not done yet, but I’m continually asking myself this question, and I do think that — I will make this observa-

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tion, that I notice there is a big generational difference. When you talk to people who are in their 20s, they don’t understand what the holdup is on this, regardless of their own sexual orientation.” He made similar remarks to gay blogger Joe Sudbay last October.

Maryland expected to legalize same-sex marriage Maryland’s Legislature is expected to legalize same-sex marriage this year. It also is expected to pass a bill outlawing anti-trans discrimination. Equality Maryland Executive Director Morgan Meneses-Sheets said the marriage bill is being introduced in the House by Majority Leader Kumar Barve and Delegate Keiffer Mitchell, and in the Senate by Majority Leader Rob Garagiola and Sen. Richard Madaleno. The measure is believed to have enough support to pass both chambers, and Gov. Martin O’Malley has vowed to sign it into law if given a chance. Maryland already recognizes same-sex marriages that take place in other states and countries. The trans-rights legislation will ban discrimination based on gender identity or expression in employment, housing and credit. Gays, lesbians and bisexuals already are protected under state law. Same-sex marriage is legal in Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Vermont and Washington, D.C. Internationally, it is legal in Argentina, Belgium, Canada, Iceland, the Netherlands, Norway, Portugal, South Africa, Spain, Sweden and Mexico City.

During that time that parents are uncomfortable they are having a tremendous impact on their kids. … My hope is that if we can educate parents privately in their homes, they can start doing the right thing for their kids sooner.” — University of Utah psychology professor David Huebner, telling The Salt Lake Tribune about the documentary Lead With Love, which focuses on the experiences of parents with gay and lesbian children


This is an entire program to bring America down and I want to tell you right now it’s well entrenched in Utah.” — Sen. Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan, as reported by Fox 13 News telling Eagle Forum members that the state’s school boards are indoctrinating students to accept gays and reject God


[Socialists] [t]each children the concepts at a very young age so by the time they’re ready to vote they’ll vote for the right candidates. Hence, Democratic Socialism.” — Utah secessionist advocate Susie Schnell to the Eagle Forum


The Core Standards have nothing to do with morals or ethics, but are simply an outline of what students in each grade should be learning in the core subjects of math and language arts. We’re not talking about sex education or even evolution here.” — The Salt Lake Tribune, criticizing Buttars for his remarks against nonbinding federal education standards

Log Cabin refuses to back off DADT case The Log Cabin Republicans are refusing to pause their federal case against the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell military gay ban even though Congress has authorized the military to repeal the policy. The ban was struck down as unconstitutional last October by U.S. District Judge Virginia Phillips in Riverside, Calif. The Obama administration, however, appealed the ruling to the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals and obtained a stay of Phillips’ injunction that had halted the ban’s enforcement worldwide. Now the administration wants the court to put the appeal on hold while the Pentagon moves on implementing DADT repeal — a process that could take months. But Log Cabin isn’t interested in delaying the proceedings. “Log Cabin Republicans are acutely aware President Obama and his administration desperately want our case to just go away. That is not going to happen,” said LCR Executive Director R. Clarke Cooper. “The Obama administration’s continued defense of this failed and unconstitutional policy is a mystery. Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell was rejected by Congress, by the Joint Chiefs of Staff and most notably by the American people. It is time for the presi-

dent to stand by his commitment and end this policy of discrimination.” LCR attorney Dan Woods expressed defiance. “Despite what the government has led the American people to believe, Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell has not been repealed and will likely remain the law of the land until the end of 2011,” Woods said. “In the meantime, openly gay individuals are not free to enlist in our armed forces, current service members must continue to live a lie, and the government continues to investigate and discharge service members. What’s more, the government is trying to delay the briefing and argument on its appeal from the judgment and injunction obtained by Log Cabin Republicans.” “The government asked us to agree to the delay and we were willing to do so on one condition: that the government halt all pending investigations and discharges during the period of delay,” Woods said. “The government refused, and its attorneys said that investigations and discharges will continue. For these reasons, Log Cabin Republicans’ case is still alive and kicking. Our filing [Jan. 10] opposes the government’s motion to delay the appeal and asks the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit, in the alternative, to stay all investigations and discharges in the event it is prepared to grant the government’s request for delay.”

international briefs

you are gay/lesbian but someone else will’ is no different.”

Gay senator leads Irish president race A poll has found that openly gay Irish Senator David Norris leads the pack seeking to be the nation’s next president. The Red C poll conducted in early January found that Norris, 66, is favored by 27 percent of voters, followed by Member of the European Parliament Mairead McGuinness at 13 percent, former Prime Minister Bertie Ahern at 12 percent, Dáil member Michael D. Higgins at 11 percent, and MEP Brian Crowley and charity executive Fergus Finlay at 10 percent.

Court: Officials can’t refuse to marry gays Marriage commissioners in Canada’s Saskatchewan province cannot refuse to marry same-sex couples, the Court of Appeal ruled Jan. 10. The top court ruled in advance on a proposed law that would have let commissioners opt out of performing gay marriages for religious reasons. The court said: “It is not difficult for most people to imagine the personal hurt involved in a situation where an individual is told by a governmental officer, ‘I won’t help you because you are black (or Asian or First Nations) but someone else will,’ or ‘I won’t help you because you are Jewish (or Muslim or Buddhist) but someone else will.’ Being told, ‘I won’t help you because

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Gay Portuguese journalist killed in NYC Well-known openly gay Portuguese journalist Carlos Castro, 65, was killed in his New York City hotel room Jan. 7. Reports said he was tortured at length, poked in the eye with a corkscrew and castrated at the InterContinental Times Square hotel. Castro’s traveling companion, 20-yearold model Renato Seabra, reportedly confessed to the attack, told police he isn’t gay anymore, and said he castrated Castro to get rid of homosexual demons.

McDonald’s Wi-Fi blocking gay news McDonald’s has come under fire in New Zealand for blocking access to gay websites on the free Wi-Fi available at restaurants. The banned sites included GayNZ, PFLAG, and Rainbow Youth. The company responded that it uses filtering software to be sure pages viewed at its locations are “child-friendly.”

Nepal to count transgender residents A new “third gender” category is being added to Nepal’s census forms in order to count transgender people. The move follows a similar decision in neighboring India. J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 7


LOCal news

Feb. 1 deadline set for Ogden discrimination ordinances By Seth Bracken

The Ogden City Council will accept public comment on Feb. 1 for proposed legislation to protect against discrimination in the workplace and in housing based on sexual orientation and gender identity. After the public hearing, it is likely that the council will take the ordinance to a vote, said Ogden City Council Member Caitlin Gochnour. This hearing will be the culmination of 10 months of discussion and cooperation between the residents of Ogden, city officials and Equality Utah, said Equality Utah Executive Director Brandie Balken. The city council heard comment from Balken and Ogden residents at a city council meeting in the Ogden Municipal Building on Tuesday night. “This is an amazing opportunity for us to partner with the administration of Ogden and with the residents of Ogden to craft

important supplemental information that can be used not only here in Ogden city, but across other cities and counties in our great state,” said Balken. Representatives from Equality Utah, an organization that aims to secure equal rights and protections for lesbians, gays, bisexuals and transgender Utahns, have met with city officials multiple times over the past 10 months, said Balken. The most recent meeting occurred on Jan.7, when a green light was given to draft the anti-discrimination legislation, she said. The ordinances will be similar to laws already passed in 10 other municipalities in Utah. The laws will make exemptions for religious organizations, small business owners and landlords that rent fewer than four rental units, Balken said. “I was actually incredibly heartened at our last meeting on Friday when a deadline was set

for draft ordinances to be provided,” she said. However, not all the Ogden residents at the meeting were as pleased with the progress of the city ordinances. “I am very grateful that the administration, the city attorney and city council have taken so much time to deliberate,” James Humphreys, an Ogden resident and vice president of the Utah Log Cabin Republicans, told the council. “I would, however, remind everyone that the residents themselves, up until this point of time, have not been involved in the process.” Gochnour said she was grateful for patience of Ogden residents as the city considered the legislation. “We’ve taken a bit of criticism for our thoughtful approach,” said Gochnour. “But we’d just like to remind everyone that Salt Lake City has been two years in creating their non-discrimination ordinances.” Details of the meeting to discuss the ordinances on Feb. 1 will be released at the end of this month and will be available at council.  Q

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Following the disbandment of Weber State University’s gay-straight alliance, two students formed a club to serve the needs and interests of the school’s diverse population. When the school’s GSA disbanded in October due to a shortage of members, Turner Bitton said that he and Dustin Porlas created diverCITY, a group that focuses on a number of social-justice issues. “We had diverCITY planned well before the actual ‘split’ of GSA,” said Bitton, a young activist who organized last year’s Rally for Equality in response to the suicides of several young, gay Utah men. “We wanted something that was focused on working with all minorities and less queer-centric.” The topics diverCITY covers are wideranging, focusing on, as Bitton said, “everything from animal rights to abortion rights.” “Each month is themed around a cause and throughout that month we work to change something on campus that has to do with that theme,” he said. For example, January’s theme is race, and it has included an observance of Chinese New Year as well as Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, during which the group attended a presentation on King’s legacy by the Utah chapter of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People. February will focus on health, with presentations on safer sex, and a suicide prevention training. On Feb. 1, the group is scheduled to attend the Ogden City Council’s hearing on two ordinances that would prohibit job and housing discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity. The council has scheduled this date as a “Fact Finding Hearing”

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for the public to weigh in on the ordinances. March, which is dedicated to “Queer Equality,” will feature diversCITY’s largest event in the spring on the 25th: what Bitton calls a “byob (bring your own beauty)” fashion show. “We are charging $5 for non-students, and $3 for students, including high school students,” he said. This month also includes a presentation by the staff of the Utah Pride Center and Equality Utah and members of the labor union AFL-CIO. QSaltLake owner and publisher Michael Aaron and transgender rights activist Dominique Storni will also speak to diversCITY members on March 29 about the diversity of Utah’s lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer community. April will be devoted to environmental awareness, and May to topics surrounding students’ rights, including Equal Access Act of 1984 (which has been used to defend gaystraight alliances), and a presentation from the American Civil Liberties Union of Utah. The “CITY” in the group’s name, Bitton told WSU’s newspaper The Signpost indicates that the group is not just for students, but for all residents of Northern Utah’s surrounding cities who want to become more educated about diversity, social justice and environmental concerns. “This club is for anyone who is willing to put aside differences for similarities,” he said. “It’s for anyone who feels that they don’t have a niche.” DiverCITY meets every Tuesday at 6:30 p.m. in WSU’s Shepherd Union Building, Room 305. Q

Who’s Afraid of Bisexuality? University of Utah professors and authors Lisa Diamond and Kathryn Stockton will host an informal discussion about bisexuality and their research titled “Two Queers in Conversation” as part of the school’s Bisexual Awareness Week. Diamond is an associate professor of psychology and gender studies, and Stockton a professor of English. A Q-and-A period will follow and light refreshments will be served. WHEN: Jan. 20 4–5 p.m. WHERE: University of Utah Olpin Student Union, Crimson View Room INFO: Ian Vilisoni Palu at 801-5877973 or COST: Free

Empathy Line The Empathy Line is a new service that allows individuals of all sexual orientations and gender identities to call in for references to social services, or just a friendly and understanding listener. The line is still looking for volunteers age 18 and over to assist with marketing and answering phones. INFO: Tiffanie Cole at 801-696-0074.

Therapist Workshop The LGBTQ-Affirmative Therapist Guild of Utah will hold an interactive workshop for mental health clinicians this March. The topic will be the ethical and therapeutic options for treating clients experiencing conflicts between sexual orientation and religious background, a topic surrounded in controversy. The workshop will discuss issues including how to assist clients while respecting their cultural background and their right to self-determination. Lunch will be included. WHEN: Mar. 4, 9 a.m.– 4:30 p.m. WHERE: Highland Ridge Hospital, 7309 S. 180 West COST: $100–$150, $60 students. Info/Registration: or Jim Struve at 801-3645700, ex. 1

Survey Says! The Utah Pride Center is surveying members of Utah’s lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer and questioning community to learn what programs and services they would like to see it offer in the future. The anonymous survey, which also seeks to identify the demographics of the population the Center serves, can be found at


Let your voice be heard As the 2011 General Legislative Session gears up, one local activist is asking lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer Utahns to make their concerns heard on Capitol Hill. On Jan. 24, Eric Ethington and several members of the local lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer community will hold “This Is Our Voice,” a rally, as Ethington explained it, to remind state legislators “just who it is that they work for.” The rally’s focus, said Ethington, is to show legislators that Utahns overwhelmingly support nondiscrimination housing and employment laws, 10 of which were passed in Utah municipalities in 2009 and 2010. “[O]n the final eve of these successes, Senate President Michael Waddoups announced that he would consider repealing everything that we have accomplished!” Ethington wrote on the rally’s Facebook event page. “Every city, county and municipality that has chosen to protect their LGBT citizens would see those rights stripped away!” Waddoups, a Taylorsville Republican, told The Salt Lake Tribune that he saw “no advantages” to codifying housing and job protections for sexual and gender minorities, and that gay and transgender rights advocates were “trying to make a mountain out of a molehill.” “I think that will be a real acrimonious debate — whether it [these protections] will be [expanded] statewide or prohibited,” Waddoups told the paper last December. “The rally is designed to highlight the fact that our state legislators aren’t listening to anybody,” said Ethington, noting that 70 percent of Utahns (as per a Tribune poll conducted last year) are in favor of extending housing and employment protections to include sexual orientation and gender identity.

It will also draw attention to Sen. Chris Buttars. Buttars, who has previously compared gays and lesbians to terrorists and called them “the biggest threat to America going down that I know,” recently announced that he will run a resolution to put Utah schools under the control of the legislature, rather than school boards. His announcement comes just weeks after the Salt Lake City School Board amended its anti-bullying codes to protect students, staff and faculty from harassment based on sexual orientation and gender identity. Ethington also said that PRIDEinUtah, the blog and organization that he runs, will hold a number of citizen lobbyist trainings throughout the session “where our readers will head up to the Capitol to engage their legislators directly.” At press time, Ethington said that these dates would be announced soon. “Also, with our legislators, never count out the possibilities of more rallies to counter their ridiculous rhetoric and ideas,” he added. “This Is Our Voice” will be held in the Capitol Rotunda on Jan. 24 from 5:30– 8:30pm. For more information contact Eric Ethington at Q



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LOCal news

Initiative calls for civility in the state Salt Lake City Mayor Ralph Becker and Utah Lt. Gov. Greg Bell joined for a press conference announcing a new initiative for civility in the state. Modeled after the “Three-R’s Project” launched in schools in 1997 calling for “rights, responsibilities and respect,” the Utah Civility and Community 2011 initiative offers up “Citizens’ Five Steps to a More Civil and Caring Utah” — self reflection, sharing of feelings, engaging in conversations, taking action, and contributing stories and ideas. Organizers of the initiative handed out colorful cards with the theme “Civility. Pass it On.” on one side and the group’s website on the other. They encouraged people to pass them out when they see heated discussions and when they wish to reward good, civil behavior. “I think it’s really important that we all consider how we are interacting with each other, how we’re listening to each other, how we’re respecting each other,” Becker said at the conference. “If we can keep these very basic principles and values in mind, Lt. Gov. Greg Bell and I will continue to be having a good discourse on things, and we’ll arrive at good decisions.”

Citizens’ Five Steps to a More Civil and Caring Utah In Utah we are committed to respectful discourse and behavior toward all people. Further we are committed to being a welcoming, inclusive and caring community. Now is a great time to pass it on and start the five steps to a more caring Utah.

Reflect I intend to make a personal assessment and reflect whether I am honoring the Civility Themes in all areas of my life.

“The simple message of the Civility Initiative is one we believe everyone can get behind and benefit from as we all strive to treat those around us with respect,” said Bell. “The best solutions and results for our community come from collaborative efforts, and true collaboration demands civility and respect for one another.” Organizers know that an initiative itself will not change a community in the short term, but hope to begin a dialogue on how people treat others. As the Utah State Legislature reconvenes and topics such as gay and transgender rights and immigration become the topics of the moment, organizers hope that all parties can engage in civil discourse rather than arguing through hyperbole, anger and name-calling. Becker said that the changing ways in which people gather their news is exacerbating the situation, rewarding those “shrill and impolite” over those more reflective. The shootings in Arizona brought similar calls for civility nationwide a week after the press conference. More information on the initiative can be found at



I am going to share my thoughts and feelings in this regard with my close friends and family and encourage a family discussion about how we can all be more civil, caring and inclusive in our daily lives.

In all of these settings we will set some action oriented goals for 2011 to more fully realize these Civility Themes, to be more civil caring and inclusive and how we might be of service to others in consistent ways and act on them.



I will engage in conversations with my neighbors, colleagues in the workplace, at school, religious gatherings and other community settings about the Civility Themes and how we can all be more civil, caring and inclusive.

During 2011, we will share the richness of our community stories, projects and ideas with other Utahns by contributing information to the Utah Civility and Community office.

Support Your Advertisers Who Bring QSaltLake to You Free of Charge and tell them

‘QSaltLake Sent Me!’ 10 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 17 2 | J a nua r y 20, 2011

Anti-gay Westboro Church announces pickets in Utah Members of the virulently anti-gay Westboro Baptist Church are threatening a two-day picket in Utah in six locations this month. Beginning at Congregation Kol Ami in Salt Lake City, a Jewish reform synagogue, WBC will picket at 8 a.m. Jan. 23 to “remind the Jews that the smiting rod of God’s wrath is on them for their role in killing Christ.” There was no mention in the announcement on the group’s site of the fact that Kol Ami’s rabbi is a lesbian. The group will move to St. Mark’s Cathedral at 10 a.m., calling it the “Episcopal Dog Kennel masquerading as a church” whose “clergy have made a living out of lying about all sins.” The next stop at 11 a.m. is the LDS Church’s Salt Lake Temple, a favorite spot for them to protest, calling the religion “silly” and “idolatrous.” On to the Sundance Film Festival, the group will picket the Eccles Theatre in Park City at 2:45 “to remind this nation that God Hates Fags, Fags Doom Nations, America is a Fag-infested Nation, ergo, America is doomed! The actors, producers, directors and fans of the Doomed American motion picture industry enjoy nothing more than engaging in drunken, wanton, riotous behavior and mocking the servants of God from WBC. Of one accord, they raise their clenched fists to God and say “No, We will not obey!”, according to the announcement. “These Hollywood heathens celebrate movies that blaspheme the Lord

such as the 1985 winner of the Special Jury Prize The Times of Harvey Milk glorifying a filthy fag, the 1986 winner Working Girls glorifying prostitutes, and various others that won for endorsing fornication, adultery, and the mocking of God’s word. WBC is here to warn you that there are consequence to these actions: death and eternal Hellfire.” [sic] The group is also angry about Kevin Smith’s film, Red State — a horror film inspired by Westboro and its leader Fred Phelps, and will return to the Eccles Theatre at 6 p.m. before its showing At a release party last month, Smith explained the premise of the movie. “It’s certainly not Phelps himself but it’s very much inspired by a Phelps figure,” said Smith. “And to me, too, the notion of using a Phelps-like character as a villain, as horrifying and scary as that guy can be, there’s even something more insidious than him that lurks out there in as much as a public or a government that allows it and that’s the other thing that I’m trying to examine in a big, big way.” On Jan. 24, the group will be in front of West High School at 7:10 a.m. In their announcement, they call West High students, teachers and parents “worthless brats” and “reprobates.” “God does not love everyone and it is not okay to be gay or to fornicate with anyone or thing you please,” the statement said. The group has announced pickets in Utah in the past and failed to show up.


Big sticks on ice By Brad Di Iorio

Jeff Lubsen has a dream to create and build Utah’s first gay and lesbian hockey team, and has been promoting the idea to Salt Lake City’s gay sport groups, non-profits, and assorted queer and straight media and bloggers. Because of his efforts, the first skateand-meet was well attended with about 14 female and male skaters. Only half of those Jeff Lubsen expressed an interest in actually learning or playing on a Utah gay hockey team. The others were there to support Lubsen and take a skate on the ice. “According to my contact with other gay teams in the United Staae, it usually takes up to a year and a half for a new team to get established,” said Lubsen. “I would like to get this team together in four months.” As a founding member of the Colorado Gay Ice Hockey Association, Lubsen estimated it took about four to six months to get enough players to be able to rent a ice

rink to have a team-only practice. Most ice rinks are open to the public. Reserved ice rink skating requires teams and coaches to rent the rink privately for practice and play. “So this is a work in progress, my goal is to develop leadership here — people who are interested in forming the organization and who can actively help build a team,” said Lubsen. “We hope to encourage as many straight allies to become involved with the team, drawing from those who are already playing hockey who also believe in playing in a non-discriminating and culturally diverse environment.” Because Utah is an active winter sports state, there are many amateur hockey leagues already in existence. “There are multiple levels of play from A being the best, to D being beginners. We will start by playing in a D recreational league and go from there,” said Lubsen. “Many of the recreational leagues that are considered men’s leagues still incorporate women. There are also leagues that are specifically designated as co-ed.” Lubsen acknowledged an unspoken rule, where some women wear pink on their uniform, on gloves or a helmet, to let men know that they are a female playing in a largely male group. “With adult recreational leagues, the hockey is non-check, less aggressive and with being fully pad-

ded, even getting knocked down or pushed, is less of an issue when you are equally padded,” Added Lubsen. Women playing in the USA Hockey League play by the same rules as men. All Utah Gay Hockey team members will eventually join USA Hockey to be eligible to play in any league or national tournament. A complete set of rules exist on the Utah Gay Hockey Association (UGHA) website. “Skating is indeed a primary skill, however, skating naturally develops once the player is in full gear, because there is less fear of falling. Beginning skaters will see their skills quadruple in the first year,” said Lubsen. “All practices will involve skating drills, puck-handling drills, shooting drills, strategic coaching and a scrimmage.” To start, the Utah hockey team will practice at public ice skating rinks, where renting the skates and time on the ice can be as little as $4 for two hours. The general public will be using the rink also so learning to skate with others on the ice is the first lesson. “I plan on coaching some of the basics to get the group started,” said Lubsen. “After that I have already been in touch with some advanced players/coaches in town who are interested in helping me.” There are equipment costs and ice rink reservation costs to consider. Equipment

required include an official helmet with faceguard, skates, a stick and gloves. Lubsen suggests getting a mouth guard mentioning that falling on one’s chin or getting hit in the mouth is the most common injury when starting hockey play. Locally, the Players Bench is a dedicated hockey retail location in Murray where beginners can buy used equipment and try out specific gear. Gear can also be found online, but fit is the major concern for some of the equipment, and experts at local retail stores can better steer beginners to the correct size & fit. “Our goal is to make hockey affordable for all walks of life. League play is usually $150 per person. Our goal is to have 14 to 16 players per private practice so that ice time will run $10 a session,” said Lubsen. “Ideally we will start practicing at least twice a month, possibly once a week if there is enough interest. The dues would simply be a pre-payment to x-number of private ice sessions.”   Q

For more information on the Utah Gay Hockey Association go to or e-mail The next skateand-meet is scheduled for Wednesday Jan. 26, 2011, from 7-9 p.m. at the UofU Steiner Aquatic Center & Ice Rink, at 645 S. Guardsman Wy (1580 East).

J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 11


Question of the issue ❝❝What is your

greatest fear or hope of this year’s legislative session?

William Jay Carlson I hope the legislature starts openly discussing queer issues again. Last year’s so called “stand down” just gave legislators an excuse to keep their heads in the sand. Kennan Beckstrand That they will act to their level of intelligence. Backward, lacking understanding, lacking compassion, full of bigotry and swayed by religion. My only hope rests on McAdams!

guest editorial Arizona shooting and class resentment By Peter Ryskewecz


n the past 23 years, only two U.S. Congress persons have been shot at. Both are Jewish: Gabrielle Giffords, last week in Arizona, and Eric Cantor of Virginia, the new GOP House Majority Leader. Given the acceptance of class warfare and class resentment — with all its rhetoric and innuendoes — in our popular culture, including the LGBT culture, it is no wonder that some nut-job spins out of control and thinks he can solve the nation’s problems by trying to kill a Jew; as many people perceive the Jewish as “the people at the top.” (Actually, several Asian-American immigrant groups, including those from India, China, Japan and Korea, make more money per capita in the United States than the Jewish people do today. So, logic says that someday soon, we will be shooting at AsianAmericans.) Class resentment so permeates our culture — gay or straight — that it has infected nearly all mainstream institutions: universities, public schools, churches, political

campaigns, unions, newspaper and media coverage of current events, commencement speeches, music, even conversations on Thanksgiving Day. And sentiment to blame every sniffle in life on the the “rich,” “people

Many of us are so warped by class hatred, we don’t even know that we are warped with money,” or the “well-to-do” certainly does not stop once you enter the gay community; rather it flourishes in gay papers and conversations at gay bars. In fact, many of us are so warped by class ha-

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tred, we don’t even know that we are warped. We believe that bashing the rich is a virtue. It may be politically incorrect, but is it any great surprise that mass murderers and serial killers such Adolph Hitler, the Unabomber Ted Kaczynski and ‘Son of Sam’ David Berkowitz (who were also considered homosexual by many objective psychologists and historians who evaluated them) were driven by class hatred? Almost all of us are to blame for tolerating the existence of class resentment in our daily lives, and that surely goes for many gay activists who claim to be egalitarians or champions of the poor. So often, when we speak up for the poor, we feel entitled to slander the wealthy ... and by innuendo, that means people who are perceived to make the most money, such as Jewish people or the well-to-do. Conversely, we should all be grateful for what these industrious and gifted people do to create opportunity and wealth — even if it is just modest wealth — for all people. Today, those who bash the rich in their daily lives should be ashamed of all the hate they promote, wittingly or unwittingly, and that includes many of us in the gay community who think we are entitled to hate just because we are gay. And therein lies the lesson of Arizona and the shooting of Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords. Q Peter Ryskewecz is a retired Michigan school teacher and graduate of University of Michigan.

Heidi Shelton My greatest hope is that more people participate vs. bitch. It’s one thing to complain, it’s another to do something about it. We elect our officials to represent our voices, if they don’t hear our voices they don’t know what’s in the best interest of Salt Lake, they go with the best interest of their party. Amber Miller Not sure about the ins and outs of this session, but I hope Home Depot is donating shovels cause there is a lot of crap to dig out of. Danny Thomas I fear they will waste time on things that don’t do anyone any good and just use 2011 to set things up for 2012 elections and not get anything done.

Queer gnosis Roseannearchy! By Troy Williams


here are many people who have inspired my worldview. Roseanne Barr is definitely one of them; outspoken, defiant, loud and always hilarious. She is a proud defender of the working class, a champion for women’s equality and a persistent advocate for the queer community. Her new book is Roseannearchy: Dispatches from the Nut Farm. We talked recently on KRCL’s RadioActive.

RB: [laughs] Oh , she loved Ayn Rand. I think as soon as you pass you are free of the BS of this world. I can imagine her liking you.

Troy Williams: We have a lot in common. We both suffer from messianic complexes.

TW: She used to say, “When it’s time to change the story, women must step up and change the story.”

Roseanne Barr: I think so many of us do.

RB: She did. That is our duty. It’s very normal to go from being small-minded and your opinion contained and shaped by the old world. Then you walk into a new world and change. It’s hard to do if you are in a big religious group. They don’t like people to change.

TW: I was born with the need to save the world. RB: I’m so glad to hear it. A lot of us born in Salt Lake have it. It’s kind of the culture here to do the best for other people. We’re all on a mission. TW: The other thing we have in common is that as a Mormon, I was healed of my Bell’s palsy from a New Age life coach. And as a Jew, you were healed of your Bell’s palsy by the Mormon Priesthood. RB: How crazy! Yes, that’s what my mother said. They came over and said a prayer and then the Bell’s palsy went away. But when I was 15 I was reading in medical journals (that was my hobby), and it said Bell’s palsy was a temporary condition, often 48 hours, so I started questioning that story. I started questioning a lot of brainwashing. I was brainwashed Mormon and Jew both. TW: The other thing we have in common is that I actually live in the very apartment that your grandmother Mary lived in and owned. RB: Isn’t that freaky? Almost everything important in my life happened in that apartment. I loved going over there. TW: She was very conservative. RB: Oh yeah. She was so right wing, like Sarah Palin. She thought everything was a big conspiracy against the small business owner. TW: I think I’ve been a good influence. RB: Are you talking with her?! TW: Yes, she came to me the other night and said, “You are so right about Ayn Rand. I’ve met her in Heaven now and she’s a total bitch!”

TW: You credit her for helping to shape your feminism. RB: She was all about the women running the family. That is how it is in ethnic families. I saw really strong women in charge. That’s what I saw as normal.

TW: It’s painful but wow, when you get to the other side it feels pretty good. RB: It feels bigger. You feel the presence of god far more when you step outside those little stalls. We are human veal in high heels in little stalls. Once you get out of there you feel a larger connection to god. TW: You once told me that when all the gays and fat girls get together we’ll change the world. RB: I swear to god! That is the most powerful thing I see. Being a fat girl in high school, we were the ones telling the thin girls how to get the guys. They had no idea. We knew how to play it. We knew how to bring people together. And so do gays and lesbians. We know how to create something different that doesn’t exclude. TW: I’m forming a group of underground radical queers called the Faggotistas and we’d like you to be our sub-commandant. RB: I, of course, will lead if called. TW: Our first act will be to abolish the forprofit health insurance industry. RB: Let’s get rid of it! It doesn’t work, it never will. It’s horrifying. Every other country on earth has universal health care. You can’t charge people for being sick and get a pay off when they die! That’s purely devil! TW: Our next step: nationalize all the oil fields so that ‘We The People’ own them. Then we’ll take all of the billions of dol-

lars in petroleum profits to invest in a green energy infrastructure. RB: You are a visionary. I totally agree! These same jerks are getting the pay off. They get the pay off when you get sick. They get a pay off for putting poison in the air and in the food. Then when you get cancer they get a pay off for your treatment and your drugs. Then they get a big pay off when you drop dead. It’s in their interest to kill people. They’re all psychopaths at the top. What the hell? And they always pass for normal. TW: An idea I got from you is to take all corporate criminals and put them into sanitation repair. RB: Or we could also get them harnessed up to treadmills (‘cause they’re almost all obese because they are hoarders), and they could power a whole city at night. Just for once in their lives they can be in service to a community. It would be new for them. And I think it might awaken some part of their soul that they sold to Satan. TW: Of course, to pay for everything I want to tax the hell out of the mega-rich. RB: Of course. I say there should be a maximum wage. I’m really a generous ruler. One-hundred million, that’s the

capper. Nobody needs $30 billion. No! You shouldn’t be allowed. I don’t draw targets over people’s faces like Sarah Palin, but I do believe that people who have robbed whole communities need to be arrested. They need to be charged and tried in a court in a law. That’s why I’m running for president. TW: In the Green Tea Party.

RB: Yes, and I’m the only candidate who advocates the use of guillotine for criminals found guilty of sedition. When you are responsible for a million people losing their homes, you gotta go! TW: We need policies that put people first and corporations last.

RB: Yes, “Peopleism” — not “socialism” or “capitalism,” but Peopleism — something in the middle that actually works.

TW: I look back on my life and I wonder how I became a raging leftist, and I remember as a teenager watching Roseanne Conner standing up to her boss and walking out of Wellman Plastics. That had a huge impact.

RB: I was hoping it would. I raised this generation, and now I must command them.  Q Podcast the entire interview at

J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 13



lambda lore Bayard Rustin By Ben Williams

id you know that the organizer of the 1963 March on Washington was not Martin Luther King, Jr., but rather Bayard Rustin, an openly gay man? Two decades after his death, Bayard Rustin, one of the great heroes of the civil rights movement, is all but forgotten. A long time aide to Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., Rustin helped organize the Montgomery bus boycott of the 1950s, suggested to King the formation of the Southern Christian Leadership Conference, and was the principal organizer of the 1963 March on Washington where King gave his famous “I Have A Dream” speech. Today, few people know about him because of his sexual orientation. Rustin was born into a Quaker family in 1912. He was an integral part of the AfricanAmerican civil rights movement, and one of the leading advocates of pacifism and passive resistance. Rustin became active in the civil rights movement when he moved to Harlem and began studying at City College of New York. He became a member of Fifteenth Street Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends (Quakers) where, at age 25, he joined the American Friends Service Committee. Here got involved in efforts to defend and free the Scottsboro Boys, nine young black men in Alabama who were accused of raping two white women. That same year he joined the Communist Party and organized the Youth Communist League. In the 1930s the Communist Party USA was a strong supporter of the AfricanAmerican civil rights movement. However, in 1941 Joseph Stalin ordered the CPUSA to abandon its civil rights work and focus on supporting U.S. entry into World War II. Thus Rustin, who was a pacifist, became disillusioned with communism. He began working with anti-communist socialists such as Philip Randolph, the head of the Brotherhood of Sleeping Car Porters, and A.J. Muste, leader of the Fellowship of Reconciliation. He then became Race Relations Secretary for the Fellowship of Reconciliation. Although Rustin had quit the Youth Communist League and become anti-communist, LDS Church President Ezra Taft Benson would, in the 1960s, accuse Martin Luther King, Jr. of being a communist and associating with communists because of Rustin. Segregationist Sen. Strom Thurmond of South Carolina similarly denounced Rustin as a “Communist, draft-dodger and homosexual.” In 1942, Rustin assisted George Houser, James L. Farmer, Jr. and activist Bernice

Fisher as they formed the Congress of Racial Equality. Although Rustin was not a direct founder, he was referred to as “an uncle of CORE.” As declared pacifists, Rustin and other members of CORE and FOR were arrested for violating the Selective Service Act. Rustin was imprisoned in Lewisburg Federal Penitentiary for two years, where he organized protests against segregated dining facilities. After being released, Rustin helped organize the Journey of Reconciliation’s “freedom rides” in 1947. These Freedom Rides were done to test a Supreme Court ruling of Irene Morgan v. Commonwealth of Virginia, which banned racial discrimination in interstate travel. On this ride, Rustin was arrested for violating Jim Crow laws that mandated segregated seating on public transportation. He then served 22 days on a chain gang in North Carolina. His experiences there were chronicled in the New York Post and initiated an investigation that eliminated chain gangs in North Carolina. CORE was conceived as a pacifist organization based on the writings of Henry David Thoreau and modeled after Mohandas Gandhi’s non-violent resistance against British rule in India. In 1948, Rustin traveled to India and learned nonviolence techniques directly from the leaders of the Gandhian movement. The conference had been organized before Gandhi’s assassination earlier that year. Rustin was arrested in Pasadena, Calif., in 1953, for homosexual activity. Charged with vagrancy and lewd conduct, he pleaded guilty to a single, lesser charge of “sex perversion” and served 60 days in jail. This was the first time that Rustin’s homosexuality had come to public attention even though he had been, and remained, candid about his sexuality. After his conviction, he was fired from FOR. He then put his energy in the War Resisters League. Rustin took leave from the War Resisters League in 1956 to advise Martin Luther King, Jr. on Gandhian tactics. At that time, King was organizing the public transportation boycott in Montgomery, Ala. known as the Montgomery Bus Boycott. The following year, Rustin and King began organizing the Southern Christian Leadership Conference.

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Rustin, however, was considered a liability by many civil rights leaders who were concerned that his homosexuality and his past Communist membership would undermine support for the movement. U.S. Representative Adam Clayton Powell, Jr., who was a member of the SCLC’s board, forced Rustin’s resignation from the SCLC in 1960 by threatening to discuss Rustin’s “morals charge” in Congress. And despite his friend King’s support, National Association for the Advancement of Colored People chairman Roy Wilkins did not want Rustin to receive

snaps & slaps SNAP: Empathy Line OK, we snapped for this a couple issues ago, but new year, new slate. The new hot line will be the first of its kind in the state — a place where lesbian, gay bisexual, transgender, queer and questioning people of all ages can seek not only resources, but a listening ear, for facing any number of challenges that pertain to being a sexual or gender minority. Given that suicide and substance abuse rates for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer people are higher than those for their straight, non-transgender counterparts, this line could not come at a better time. If you’re over 18 years old please consider volunteering to staff the phone lines, and if you’re under 18, please contact the Utah Pride Center to find out other ways that you can help.

SLAP: Sen. Chris Buttars There is a scientific law that governs the Utah Legislature: a general session cannot pass without Sen. Chris Buttars sticking his foot in his mouth at least once. But this year, he seems to have begun early. At a meeting of the arch-conservative Eagle Forum, the West Jordan Republican accused state school boards of trying to undermine God and the state’s values, and said that any public credit for his role in planning the march even though Rustin served as the deputy director and chief organizer. A year before his death in 1987, Rustin testified on behalf of New York State’s Gay Rights Bill. In a speech before the New York legislators, he asserted: “Today, blacks are no longer the litmus paper or the barometer of social change. Blacks are in every segment of society and there are laws that help to protect them from racial discrimination. The new “niggers” are gays. ... It is in this sense that gay people are the new barometer for social change. ... The question of social change should be framed with the most vulnerable group in mind: gay people.” Rustin wrote several essays, recorded songs and received numerous honorary doctorates while continuing his involvement as an officer on numerous human rights committees. He was survived by his partner of 10 years, Walter Naegle. Q

he would strive to put state schools under the Legislature’s authority. While he hasn’t yet said that punishing the Salt Lake City School Board for protecting gay and transgender students from bullying is the real purpose of his plan, does anyone really believe otherwise? And while we’re at it, why the hell is Buttars running the State Public Education Committee after his call to do away with the 12th Grade last year? Asking Buttars to be ashamed of himself is like asking a pig to sing, but we can certainly ask his colleagues to be ashamed of him, and to vote down his Senate Joint Resolution that would hamstring the state’s school boards.

THE SEAWEED IS ALWAYS GREENER FEBRUARY 5 DEBUSSY’S LA MER | 8 PM ABRAVANEL HALL AFTER PARTY | 10 PM CAFFÈ MOLISE Eastern romanticism meets visual impressionism in this duo-themed concert. Debussy’s vastly important work La Mer will sweep you away with its beautiful depiction of the sea; especially when paired with the exotic influence of Mozart’s Overture to The Abduction from the Seraglio and Bartók’s Violin Concerto No. 2.


J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 15

our views

the straight line Getting involved Your one-stop shop for all your dogs needs Best of SLC ‘08, ’09 & ‘10 Dog Trainer of the Year

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By Bob Henline


n my last column I discussed the value of activism and the importance of getting involved in the political process. The general session of the Utah State Legislature begins on Jan. 24, 2011, just a few days away. During this session, there will be a number of bills and resolutions being considered that will undoubtedly

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impact all of our lives, both with respect to the LGBTQ community and outside. Regardless of your personal position on these matters, it is important to participate in the process, and make your voice heard. The obvious question that arises as a result of this appeal is: how do I get involved and make my voice heard? The first step in this process is to be informed. Find out what bills are being considered, and what impact they have on your life and the lives of those around you. The website of the Utah Legislature is a good place to start ( This site will provide you with information about all of the bills and resolutions being considered during the session. It also provides links to the House and Senate rosters which provide contact information for each member. If you don’t know who your representatives are, visit for the Senate map or DistrictInfo/newMaps/State.htm for the House map. Once you’ve determined your position on a particular issue, the next step is to communicate that position to your elected representatives. You can do this in either a conciliatory or confrontational manner. Generally speaking, your first attempt should be conciliatory, as most people respond better to a calm and rational approach. There are however, as we all know, certain members of the Utah Legislature that just can’t be reasoned with, so there are times when a more confrontational approach is required. When contacting your elected official I recommend that you have a written position statement about the issue at hand. Research the issue and understand the facts, then write a well-reasoned statement that explains your position on the matter. Include basic facts, numbers and bullet points when possible, and keep it as brief as you can while covering the topic. Now the fun starts: getting in touch with your elected official of choice. I advise people to first e-mail their position statement to the representative they intend to contact. But don’t stop there, it’s easy to ignore an e-mail. If you have the time and ability, go to the Capitol during the legislative session. Find out when the bill is being considered by the appropriate committee and try to attend. Attempt to contact your desired representative at that time, and bring a copy of your position statement. If you have the time, circulate your position to other registered voters and have them

sign the hard copy in support of the position. Numbers always help. Find your representative and introduce yourself as a registered voter from his/her district. Tell them that you sent an e-mail explaining your position but would like to discuss it personally. Understand that they may not have read the e-mail — they receive thousands — and then give them the hard copy. Listen to what they have to say about the issue and explain your position — again, as briefly as possible. Show an appropriate level of respect for their time. At this point, you’ll be faced with one of three situations: 1) your representative agrees with your position and will vote accordingly; 2) your representative disagrees with your position; or 3) he/she is noncommittal. In any case, thank them for their time, but now you have a decision to make. If they agree with you, do you want to put more effort into it? If so, ask them what you can do to help sway other key members of the Legislature. Are there certain obstacles that need to be overcome, and how can you help with that? If they disagree, are you ready to become confrontational? Remember, threatening violence or acting hostile at the Capitol is likely to land you in some hot water, legally, and it won’t accomplish your mission. Confrontational in the political sense means organizing or participating in protests, rallies, petition drives and other activities designed to legally call attention to the issue at hand. Begin an e-mail or fax campaign, fill up their inboxes with as many pledges of support as you can find. If the issue is meaningful enough to you, begin a campaign to beat this legislator in the next election. Non-committal legislators are probably the most difficult to work with. On the one hand, you want them to either support or oppose your position, but on the other, you don’t want to irritate a potential supporter to the point that you push them the other way. Explain to them why you feel the issue is so important, and continue to bring the problem to their attention. Help organize other people to meet with the legislator (in a conciliatory manner) to communicate the same position. Invite him/ her to an event regarding the issue at hand. Remember, whether the legislator believes it or not, they are the servants of the people. You are the people, and you have the power to remove them from their positions. The question, as always, is how far are you willing to go in support of your beliefs? While this certainly isn’t a comprehensive guide to citizen action, I hope it provides you with a place to start. If you have specific questions or need any guidance in this regard, my e-mail address is listed below and I’d be more than happy to speak with anyone on this topic. Q

Bob Henline is a straight man. Don’t hold that against him — he was born that way. He is also a professional author and editor. His blog can be read at, and he can be reached at

mountain meadow mascara Blazing a trail By Ruby Ridge


o Petals, have you seen Black Swan yet? OMG! Talk about lezbo porn with leg warmers. I went to see it last night with a buddy, and we came out of the theater in shock. It was awesome. There was a make-out scene between Mila Kunis and Natalie Portman that was so hot, the kernels at the bottom of the popcorn bucket started popping. Definitely go see Black Swan while it’s on the big screen. And my proud lesbian sisters you will thank me for this later, but do yourself a favor, and go see Black Swan in a theater with a good vibrating sound system. Yeah, you know exactly what I’m saying. Anyways muffins, last weekend I hosted one of our Big Gay Fun Bus trips to Wendover and it was such a blast. “So Ruby, just how gay is the Big Gay Fun Bus,” you ask? Well let’s just say that when we showed the DVD of Momma Mia on the way home, the entire bus knew all of the words and were singing. Yup ... the Big Gay Fun Bus is really, really, super gay! Plus it raises money for our QCares charitable causes, so it’s all good. Somehow we oversold the seats so we ended up having to change to a bigger bus, and even then we had to turn some lastminute folks away. The moral of the story peaches? Buy your tickets online and buy them early! But while you’re here, I do have to tell you something about Wendover so spectacularly appalling it warrants documentation in print. For those of you with delicate sensibilities go make a snack in the kitchen, as you may not want to read this. While I was at the Montego Bay I was really hot so I decided to walk up the hill to the Red Garter (don’t panic darlings, I was wearing sensible flats). It was a bit chilly

outside but it was kind of nice to get out of the noise and away from that heinous casino carpet. As I walked across from the Peppermill Concert Hall I noticed there were a lot of cocktail glasses laying on the sidewalk and worst of all there were huge sprays of semifrozen vomit for about 200 yards. I was appalled but at the same time I was mesmerized. There had to be some monumental story of excess and regret behind this trail of chunky, well preserved forensic evidence. Pumpkins, I sincerely hope there was more than one person producing this trail of puke, because it was pooled about every 10 feet. It was like the Rainbow Buffet had reenacted the Catholic Stations of the Cross. Station Number 2. Jesus is given his cross. HUUUURLLLL ... looked like blue cheese dressing and that fake krab salad stuff. Station Number 3. Jesus falls the first time BWAAAKKK ... this one looked runny and thin, I’m thinking Bloody Mary’s and some type of shredded stuff that might have been pineapple. Station Number 6. Veronica wipes the face of Jesus ... BLAAAAHHHHGGG ... dark fluids and big chunks of egg noodles, I’m definitely thinking there was stroganoff involved because the sauce was way too dark to be an alfredo. I weaved in and out of vomit like a slalom racer as I laughed my ass off all the way to the Rainbow Casino. After surveying all of that projectile carnage I came to the only logical conclusion I could. The Kenny Loggins concert must have been epic! Ciao, babies. Q

Yup, the Big Gay Fun Bus is really, really, super gay!

You can see Ruby Ridge and the Matrons of Mayhem in all of their polyester glory at Third Friday Bingo (every Third Friday of the month at 7pm) at First Baptist Church (777 South 1300 East).

See Ruby Ridge and the Matrons of Mayhem in all their polyester glory at Third Friday Bingo 7pm, First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 East J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 17

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lipstick lesbian I ruff By H. Rachelle Graham


y former bishop compared me to a dog; my puppy hated that so much she went in for the bite. Fortunately, neither of them ever pressed any charges. While it’s true I’m close to my dog, Faith, for sure beyond the normal realm of connection between a dog and their human companion, (that’d be me) I have not asked Faith to marry me or exchanged rings with her; besides whenever I even try to touch her fingernail she nips off mine. With this in mind, I can’t understand how my former bishop and so many other religious leaders actually say with a straight face; if I’m going to ask a woman to marry me I might as well ask my dog too. Oh, excuse me; ask my dog instead of the woman I love because that would somehow be just as sane, or using their terminology, morally-wrong. First of all, what led him and so many others to jump from a woman to a dog is an acid trip. Contrary to popular belief, shape-shifters are not real. Sorry to have to say this, but neither are vampires or werewolves. While it’d be nice if I were 10 years

younger or more accurately if I were a few hundred years older, then vampire Rosalie and I could dance off into the twilight together, but that’s only what happens in the movies. Just can’t figure out why a person asking to marry a dog is somehow just as non-fictional as same-sex marriage. Second of all, the worst consequence of marrying a same-sex partner might be that we’d have to deal with people comparing our love to bestiality. Well there’s the not going out in public without being tackled by nine men in penguin suits or the fact we have next to zero rights in a place where we pay taxes. But these are not our fault. Same-sex couples will not hurt others; no lonely plural wives, diseases and deformities, or a half-human/half-dog creation. No one is abused or taken advantage of in a mature same-sex relationship. Can we say the same of all heterosexual relationships, especially since most of the religiously dominated ones still adhere to strict patriarchal values, where the woman’s feelings come dead last in the family, even though they do most of the housework and child-rearing, on top of careers.

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It may be true two men or two women can’t physically procreate together, but so what? Neither can a significant amount of straight couples, but they can raise, support and provide love for a child, where they can foster an environment that doesn’t breed hate, ignorance or how to use God as an excuse for their behaviors. It’s no wonder the first study of its kind done by Bos and Gartrell found that children of lesbian couples have higher self-esteem, more confidence and do better academically, and have less behavioral problems. It would have made more sense to have my bishop reward me for having the courage and strength to use my own free agency and judgment; to stand up for what I believe in and live in a way, in the only way, that can make me truly happy and healthy. In-

stead of bringing me to tears many times, the church could have used their power and money to help a castoff and abused group of people by accepting them for who they truly are; a kind and benevolent people. I hope a day will come when my bishop will not compare me to bestiality, but will want to bring me back to his ward with pure acceptance and unconditional love. He will look at my heart and not my orientation. He will remember the moments I spent in his family room, or served the people in his ward, or that we are “brothers” and “sisters.” This time he will not see me as a monster, a person who would marry my dog and take advantage of the being I love so much I call her a child, but will see what my dog only took seconds to see, the pain he caused with his words.  Q

creep of the week Cindy Jacobs By D’Anne Witkowski


hanks to Fred Phelps and his Westboro Baptist thugs, everybody knows that God hates fags. But you know what else God hates? Birds and fish. Because of the fags. At least that’s what Cindy Jacobs says in a video she posted online Jan. 5. Jacobs, along with her husband Mike, runs Generals International, a ministry “devoted to training in prayer and spiritual warfare.” She calls herself a prophet and claims that people are always turning to her for insight when crazy shit happens. Take for instance that whole alarming incident with the thousands of blackbirds falling dead out of the sky in Arkansas on New Year’s Eve. Spooky. No one knows why it happened, or why three days later hundreds more fell out of the sky in Louisiana. Or why a few days after that thousands of dead fish washed up on an Arkansas shore. But Jacobs has a good theory: the gays. Not that the gays themselves killed the birds and fish, but that God killed them because God was pissed off about gay rights, specifically the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. “According to biblical principles, marriage is between a man and a woman, so we have to say, ‘What happens when a nation makes a decision that’s against God’s principles?’” She asks while wearing a purple leopard-print jacket. “Well, often what happens is that nature itself will begin to talk to us. And you know there are actually some patterns that you can see where a nation will make a decision that is contrary to the principles of God and after that there is some kind of answer that God gives — being the God of creation, the God who created nature.” The problem, however, is that “we don’t always understand what he’s saying.” Which is where Jacobs comes in: to sort it

all out for us and come to the sanest possible conclusion. Did I mention she calls herself a prophet? “Let’s talk about this Arkansas pattern and say, could it be a pattern? We’re going to watch and see,” she continues. “But the blackbirds fell to the ground in Beebe, Ark. Well the Governor of Arkansas’ name is Beebe. And also, there was something put out of Arkansas called Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell by a former governor ... Bill Clinton.” She then asks if there could be a connection between the Hosea 4 in the Bible, where God gets pissed at folks in Israel who are killing and stealing and sleeping around, and declares that everyone there is going to waste away and die along with all of the animals, including “the birds of the air” and “the fish of the sea.” “And so,” Jacobs asks, “could there be a connection between (Hosea 4) and now that we’ve had the repeal of the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, where people now, legally in the United States, have broken restraints with the Scripture because the Scripture says in Romans 1 that homosexuality is not allowed?” Huh, could there be? Hey, I don’t know, lady. You’re the prophet. “It could be because we have said it’s OK for people who commit these kinds of acts to be recognized in our military for the first time in our history there is a potential that there is something that actually happened in the land where a hundred thousand drum fish died and also where these birds just fell out of the air,” she says. Sure. Because it totally makes sense that God would be all, “I don’t want homos in the United States military! I am so pissed off I could kill a few thousand birds and some more thousand fish to teach those gays a lesson.” And then school children could look on in horror and vow to never become gay soldiers. Amen.  Q

1 8 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 17 2 | J a nua r y 20, 2011

Happy trails to you By Joselle Vanderhooft


ews sure does travel fast in this valley. Long before I sat down to write this goodbye, nearly everyone I interviewed asked me if it was true that I was leaving. Rumors of my departure have not been highly exaggerated. After this issue, I will be resigning as QSaltLake’s assistant editor and moving to Florida, to start another chapter in my life with my girlfriend. School and work have kept us apart for six years, and now that graduate degrees have been achieved and resumes are no lon-

ger blank, we wanted to take the opportunity to move closer to one another. Of course, entering a new part of one’s life always means leaving another behind — in this case, Utah’s kind, inspiring and all-around wonderful lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer community, whom I have reported on and grown to cherish like family in the last six years. I was fortunate enough to be in the right place at the right time when this newspaper (under the name Salt Lake Metro at the time) opened its doors in 2004. In April of that year, a mistake on my undergraduate thesis’ title page sent me to the University of Utah’s English Department to get a second signature from my adviser. While I waited for his class to end, I saw that a new gay and lesbian paper was looking for writers. Well, I thought, I did this journalism thing in high school, and I just spent the last five years analyzing Shakespeare, Beckett and Blake. I could make this work.

The article I submitted to then-editor Brandon Burt was actually a piece I had written as a 17-year-old high school student. But he liked it, warts and all, enough to bring me on as a writer. Little did I know that decision would begin a years-long relationship with the paper — and I say relationship because, as part of a small staff, sometimes I felt as if I was married to my job! In that time I’ve covered just about every subject imaginable, from anti-gay assaults and gay rights legislation, to breakthroughs in HIV treatment, to prominent lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender business owners, to pet psychics. Whether hard-hitting news or fluffy features, I have enjoyed researching, covering and writing each and every story. I have also enjoyed meeting you, our readers and community members. And while I am excited to see my girlfriend more, I will miss talking to you, laughing with you, crying with you and celebrating with you as our rights are achieved bit by bit. But while I am

stepping down as assistant editor, I am hopeful that I will still be able to write articles for the paper, as I began doing all those years ago. As I told Michael Aaron a few weeks ago, “It’s not going to be that easy to get rid of me. I think I’ll be here until they turn off the lights!” What can I say? This “journalism thing” has become as much a profession as it has an addiction. As 2011 goes on, I hope the best for all of you, politically and personally. Keep on being the wonderful, gracious and kind people that you are, even when legislators, clergy members and loved ones say and do hateful and saddening things. And most of all, don’t ever stop speaking out for your rights, and against injustices against all people. After all, we as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer people are not truly free as long as anyone is oppressed. My love to you all.  Q

J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 19


2011 Legislative Preview

Last year brought unprecedented victories to Utah’s lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer community in the form of 10 municipal ordinances prohibiting housing and employment discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity. As the 2011 general Legislative Session opens, however, the community will need to work to safeguard these protections and to make further advances. QSaltLake is happy to present this guide to what you can expect in the coming two months.

Housing and Employment The push for a statewide law that would protect employees and tenants from discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity began in 2008 with a bill by then-Rep. Christine Johnson. Titled “Antidiscrimination Act Amendments,” her legislation was part of the Common Ground Initiative, a set of four bills sponsored by statewide gay and transgender rights group Equality Utah, that sought more protections for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people. Despite receiving widespread support from the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community, Johnson’s bill failed to make it to the House floor that year, and in 2009. In 2010, Johnson did not run the legislation as part of an agreement with Republican leaders. As part of this agreement, all gay and transgender-related bills were put on hold in exchange for allowing Salt Lake City’s own gay and transgender-inclusive nondiscrimination ordinance to stand. A total of 10 Utah municipalities have now enacted similar ordinances, which forbid landlords with four or more units and employers with 15 or more employees from firing, refusing to hire, harassing or evicting people based on actual or perceived sexual orientation or gender identity. Religious-owned organizations are exempt. Johnson, who is openly lesbian, did not seek another term and moved out of state last summer to accept a job as executive director of Equality South Carolina. This year, her bill has been taken up by Sen. Ben McAdams, D-Salt Lake City. McAdams replaced openly-gay Sen. Scott McCoy in late 2009 and won the seat on his own right during last year’s election.

20 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 17 2 | J a nua r y 20, 2011

McAdams, a straight, married member of the LDS Church, said that he agreed to take on the bill because of his background with Salt Lake City’s ordinances. As an assistant to Salt Lake City Mayor Ralph Becker, he spent a great deal of time answering legislators’ questions about what the capital’s ordinances would and would not do. “I feel like I have a rapport with my Republican colleagues about this issue and know some of their concerns, and where they might be inclined to agree and where their disagreements are,” he said. The fourth version of the bill, said McAdams, will be a little different from Johnson’s, which he described as taking “more of a circuitous path” to seeking protections. “My approach is that we can take a much cleaner approach to this,” he said. “Utah has an anti-discrimination law in its code. We’re just inserting sexual orientation and gender identity to the list of [its] enumerated protections.” At press time, McAdams said that he had not drafted the bill and would like to get more feedback from the community “to see if there are ways we can compromise, to accomplish my goals and resolve concerns of other parties who may be opposed [to the bill].” And so far, McAdams has said that he has received a wide range of feedback on the legislation. “It ranges everywhere, from people who are supportive ... to people who aren’t convinced there’s a problem [with job and housing discrimination against lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people]. And then at the other end there are people who are opposed to the entire premise of the bill,” he said. Shortly before Christmas, Grand County became the 10th Utah

municipality to sign on to the nondiscrimination ordinances. At that time, Senate President Michael Waddoups told The Salt Lake Tribune that McAdams’ was “running a risk” by entering his bill. “I think that will be a real acrimonious debate — whether it will be [expanded] statewide or prohibited,” Waddoups told the paper. This and past statements by legislators, as well as a number of canceled bills from last session that targeted Salt Lake City’s ordinances, has lead many members of the local lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community to worry that this session will also see bills forbidding municipal governments from acting protections like those in Salt Lake City. These concerns have lead activists like Eric Ethington to organize “This Is Our Voice,” a rally scheduled for the session’s Jan. 24 opening. The purpose of this rally, he said, is to show legislators that a majority of Utahns favor these protections. Indeed, a 2010 poll by The Tribune found that 70 percent of Utahns did. “I haven’t heard it firsthand, but I have heard rumors that there are people who don’t like what Salt Lake City started and what other cities have followed and would like to see these [ordinances] overturned,” said McAdams, adding that he had not yet seen any bills seeking to do this. He said that he would like to have a dialogue with those who oppose these protections. “I think there is room in our Utah community to offer protections at work and at home for members of the gay community that doesn’t compromise the values of other members of the Utah community,” he said. “I think we can have protections and I think we can value religious liberty at the same time.” —Continued on page 22

. to the Floor l is eturned il R b e Is l th il g n B ri The ittee hea m m co ittee e m th ith a com Following ll house w fu e ut o th l il to b orts the returned mittee rep substim , co ts e n e Th m . d report ith amen ws w ra ly d b r ra to la vo fa bled. d. A legis favorably, as been ta t Develope at the bill h ciding wha e th d r An Idea Is o in , . The d s e te rc tu re as n Session rous sou ed in Ope e Legislatu from nume t th a b oor in e fl D d g n ce is ri u introd The Bill e from ssion. Du m se n co e s p a should be o e iid in f ted d or subst ecial r sources o bill is deba e amende encies, sp b g n a a bill. Majo t a ca n l r e il fo m b e order or, and ts, govern debate, th (circled). In the Govern ld constituen e it s, h st s, e yi b ve b n ti b ups, lo presenta tuted. It ca interest gro ouse of Re st H u e m l th il b ss a e tor. tes. Th bill to p the legisla submitorder t least 38 vo a is in e a te iv e a id ce n e e re S Th the must d Drafted. 15 votes in esearch an The Bill is ive at least gislative R ce Le re f o ve ce ti ffi O legisla ted to the npartisan e to pass. ses in th unsel, a no quest. The re l il b Both Hou General Co a f o es rough ss th rm a e fo P n e l st o , in th The Bil views exi bill has g e re y th e r fe staff office rn ft o A tt a re. presiding o res ill drafting Legislatu and prepa ed by both n s, g e r si assigned b su ke is is a it e e p s, the S searches th both house . The bill is sident and ing law, re chnical form Senate Pre d te e e r h e ct (t p u rs d ro n p ce fi co the bill in al review is se). mber. A fisc e bill is of the Hou vernor’s given a nu attached. Th tional for the Go is d ” e r te a o p N e l ca Pr Research constitu and a “Fis The Bill is Legislative atutory or f st o r ce fo nal d ffi e O w e the bill in fi also revie Action. Th l prepares se n u o C l l. s. ra il ed” b introconcern and Gene the “enroll . The bill is is is called the roduced t Th to . In d e rm is rr fo l fe il The B vernor’s re and re es the Go e Legislatu iv th e to ec the R in l d il duce The B ill is sent to enrolled b mittee. e m o er sign the Th e C h . e it s t e le it ion n u R Act n. He ca io ing Comm ct d a n is out his h ta r S e law with eceives les Governor fo w it becom The Bill R ut. The Ru o p ll a In r o c , li it b nd Pu siding bill, veto Review a s to the pre d commend h the re ic h e signature. w te it to bill enacte m e Com ective. A committe g Eff it in m d es n m m a lco st eco ing ays fo officer the The Bill B . The stand ective 60 d be referred lature is eff e bill and is th g er date is s Le th w o e e n vi th a bill should re y may b nt, unless meeting, e e n of Utah m te e it p rn o m u n jo m a d Source: State tee, in lowing a ony. The co im  st l. te il a c b li ub the r make receives p specified in bstitute, o ld, table, su ill. o b h e , d th n n e o m n a atio commend favorable re

How an idealaw becomes a

Testifying before a legislative committee

Citizen participation in committee hearings impacts government policy. Legislative committees lie at the heart of Utah’s legislative process. Committee meetings are open to the public and provide a forum for citizens to express their views about proposed legislation, budgets, and other public policy issues. Public testimony may influence the committee’s action. It also becomes part of the permanent record and may be used in future research. Well-prepared public testimony before a legislative committee can be exciting and fulfilling. Four Suggestions to Enhance Your Appearance before a Legislative Committee:


Know Your Audience The members of the committee are “citizen legislators.” In addition to their public service, they have full-time jobs. They are farmers, public employees, doctors, lawyers, homemakers, craftsmen, and a host of other occupations and professions. They are a cross section of Utah’s society. They are your neighbors and friends.

Be courteous. Don’t accuse committee members of causing your particular problem. Resist the temptation to scold, put down, or insult the decision-makers or other witnesses. This tactic will likely alienate them from your cause.


Know the Issue Support your personal opinions with clear, understandable facts. Be knowledgeable of the “other side of the story.” You may be asked to discuss the differences. Draw from your own knowledge and experience.


Be Familiar with the Committee Process Know the meeting time and location. Meeting times and locations are found on the meeting agenda. Agendas are posted 24 hours in advance of the meeting on the third floor of the State Capitol building or they can be located at the legislative home page on the Internet, le.utah. gov. Check to make sure the issue you are following has not been removed from the agenda. Agenda items may not be heard in the order in which they appear. Contact the staff policy analyst in advance

2011 Legislative Calendar January 24 First day of session February 2 Last day for the Legislature to either pass or defeat each base budget bill by noon February 3 Last day to request bills or appropriations without floor approval by noon February 3

Utah State Legislative Session 101

of the meeting to request permission to testify and to be placed on the committee chair’s list of those wishing to speak. If possible, attend a committee meeting before you testify to become familiar with the process and room layout.

February 25 Last day for legislators to prioritize fiscal note bills and identify other programs for new funding March 3 Last day for Executive Appropriations Committee to complete all decisions necessary to draft the final appropriations bill March 4 Any bond bill shall be made available to legislators by noon and final action must be taken by calendared closing time March 4 Last day to pass any bill with a fiscal note of $10,000 or more March 7 Last day for a motion to reconsider March 7

Last day to consider bills from own house

March 8

General appropriations bills, supplemental appropriations bills, and school finance bills shall be available to legislators by calendared floor time and final action must be taken on each bill by calendared closing time

March 10

The final appropriations bill shall be made available to legislators by calendared floor time and final action must be taken by noon


Prepare Your Written Testimony and Oral Presentation Give copies of your testimony to the committee staff before you begin your presentation. Begin your presentation by addressing the chairperson first, then members of the committee. “Chair ____, members of the committee ...” For the record, state your name, address, and the organization or group you represent. State your purpose for testifying. Do not read your testimony to the committee word for word. Prepare an outline. Be prepared to summarize your testimony in one minute — that may be all the time you are allowed. Thank the committee members and offer to answer any questions. When a member asks you a question, respond: “Chair (last name) or Senator/ Representative (last name), the answer to your question is ...” Relax. The committee understands that this can be an intimidating experience — they don’t expect a perfect presentation.Source: State of

Last day to approve bills for numbering without floor approval by noon

March 10

Last day of session

March 30

Last day governor may sign or veto bills

May 9

Last day a veto-override session may begin

May 10

Normal effective date for bills

May 10

First day to file bills for the 2011 General Session

J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 21

Utah State LegislatURE

2011Utah Legislative Session Preview

ruling in the case of two lesbian parents who split up after agreeing to conceive and raise a child together. In that case, Jones v. Barlow, the court said that non-biological, non-adopted parents were essentially legal strangers to their children. In doing so, they overturned a lower court’s judgment that the doctrine of in loco Continued from page 20 parentis (Latin for “in place of a parent”) meant that individuals acting in the role of a parent had rights and responsibilities to their children. McAdams will also run a bill seeking to allow same-sex partners If passed, Chavez-Houck’s bill would change that. It would, she and adults dependent on a non-spousal adult to sue in cases of said, give a biological parent the power to designate an individual wrongful death. with whom he or she wishes to parent a child. That individual The first bill of this kind was introduced by then-Sen. Scott would then be able to adopt the child. McCoy in 2007 and has changed drastically over the years that Although polls have shown that the majority of Utahns are it has appeared before Senate committees, where it has always uncomfortable with same-sex couples adopting children, Chavezbeen kept from making it to the floor. Houck noted that “they seemed to be more comfortable about an “This one is one that I think just makes sense,” said McAdams. individual saying I want to co-parent with someone else.” “It reflects that in “I hear the horrific stories of where a child knows two individuour Utah community als and the biological mom or dad dies and this other partner we have families of who this child knows has no legal right to that child,” she said. “I different make ups can’t imagine being in that situation, having lost one parent and and backgrounds the other parent isn’t your parent. I think that’s a horrible thing to and the law should do to a family.” reflect that.” She noted that current Utah law also affects straight couples Although the bill who are not married, as well as grandparents who wish to adopt has not yet been their grandchildren drafted, McAdams but cannot. said that it will state “If we’re all about that dependent parental rights in this same-sex partners state, which often and an adult in a detimes I hear, why pendent, non-marican’t we look at [this tal relationship can situation] from this sue if the individual perspective?” said upon whom they Chavez-Houck. are dependent dies An identical due to negligence version of Chavezor recklessness. If Utah State Sen. Ben McAdams Houck’s bill will be an individual can offered to the Senate provide proof that he or she was in a financially interdependent by Minority Leader relationship with the deceased individual, he or she can then sue Ross Romero. The for lost income. purpose of the dual “What the bill would propose is that we recognize families where bill, both legislators the relationship is marriage, but we should also recognize [other] said, is to see if the financially interdependent relationships, whether they are gay famiSenate might be lies or elderly sisters who never married and live in a relationship willing to consider where they’re dependent on each other’s income,” he said. Utah State Rep. Rebecca Chavez-Houck the issue if the House The bill would require individuals to produce proof of such does not. things as joint bank accounts, shared rent or mortgage before a “I thought we don’t even have a sense of what the Senate will suit could be made. do with this issue, so I talked to Rebecca about running it and starting in the Senate,” said Romero, a Salt Lake City Democrat. If Chavez-Houck’s bill makes it out of committee, Romero said that Since 2000, unmarried Utah couples have been unable to legally he will be its Senate sponsor, and vice versa. adopt children. This, of course, includes same-sex couples “We want there to be an option for parents to designate who who are forbidden from marrying both by Utah law and its is the best parent for their child and who would be the best coConstitution. In 2008, Rep. Rebecca Chavez-Houck sought to parent for their child,” he said. change this. At this time, Chavez-Houck and Romero said that they are finalThat year, the Salt Lake City Democrat ran a bill that would have izing their bills’ language. repealed the 2000 law as part of Equality Utah’s Common Ground “It’s a work in progress that should be ready to be advanced at Initiative. However, her legislation was defeated in committee the beginning of the session,” said Romero. that year and in 2009. It was also tabled last year as part of the He said that he was not sure which Senate committee would same legislative compromise that effected Johnson’s anti-discrimtake on the bill if it makes it out of the Rules Committee, but noted ination bill. that Government Operations and Judiciary were two possibilities. During that session, Chavez-Houck said that her bill would undergo a significant change. Rather than seek adoption rights, it will now seek to secure rights for non-biological parents who cannot adopt.“My dream would be to repeal what we had passed In 2007, the Utah Legislature passed a law mandating that Utah schools adhere to a basic code prohibiting bullying, harassment in 2000,” she said. “But the challenges I ran into [with this bill] and hazing. But today, said Brandie Balken, executive director of during the first years running it told me I needed to see if there Equality Utah, fewer than 40 percent of Utah’s schools have an were other ways to fight this one piece at a time.” accessible anti-bullying policy. In 2007, the Utah Supreme Court handed down a controversial

Wrongful Death

Second-parent Adoption

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Anti-Bullying and Harassment

“Meaning it’s not on their websites or in their student handbooks,” she explained. “How will students know what their rights are?” Last year, several high-profile suicides of students made antigay bullying a much-discussed topic in local and national news. Before that, the 2007 Massachusetts Youth Risk Survey determined that lesbian, gay and bisexual youth were up to four times more likely to attempt suicide than their heterosexual counterparts (the study did not include transgender students). A number of Utah parents would like the Legislature to help these numbers go down. “My experience has been that we need to do everything we can to raise awareness of how bullying and harassment of youth is everywhere, the school hall, the school class room, the locker room, the phone, the radio, the television and in the mall,” said Kathy Godwin, president of the Salt Lake City chapter of Parents, Families & Friends of Lesbians and Gays. “We can no longer dismiss these actions as ‘kids will be kids, and these realities will toughen our youth to be resilent adults.’” During the past few months, Godwin and several parents have been working together to encourage the Legislature to enforce the 2007 statue in order to “clearly communicate to students, staff and families on the anti-bullying and anti-harassment regulations and expectations for recourse.” “[T]his is a community push ... parents, friends, employers, teachers, community leaders, and politicians,” said Godwin. “I feel the attitude will change if we begin to set foundational frameworks in which to empower administrations on how to help teachers communicate to students, parents, families and staff on how to counter bullying and harrassement.” One school district has changed its policies to explicitly protect lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender students, faculty and staff. During its last meeting in 2010, the Salt Lake City School Board added protections based on sexual orientation and gender identity to its nondiscrimination codes. While Sen. Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan, did not mention the board’s policy change in a recent speech to members Eagle Forum, he nonetheless told the ultra-conservative group that state school boards were encouraging students to “question absolutes.” “By accepting that, there’s no God because he deals in absolutes,” Buttars told KSTU Fox 13 News. “This is an entire program to bring America down and I want to tell you right now it’s well entrenched in Utah.” Buttars has enrolled SJR 1 “Joint Resolution on State Board of Education Authority,” which would make the State Board of Education’s control of Utah’s public education system contingent on statue. And while the resolution does not specifically mention school anti-bullying policies that include gay and transgender people, some members of Utah’s lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community believe the resolution’s purpose is to prohibit school boards from enacting such policies. “Senator “black babies are dark and ugly things” Chris Buttars was recently named as chair of the State Public Education committee, despite his call in 2010 to eliminate the 12th grade as “unnecessary,”” wrote activist Eric Ethington on his blog, PRIDE in Utah, referring to Buttars’ infamous 2007 comparison of a bill he did not like to “a black baby ... a dark, ugly thing.” “It appears he plans to use his latest position of power as much as possible in his war against civil rights” Ethington’s post continued. “His proposed resolution, SJR 1, strips the State School Board of the power to make changes to their policies unless they are already provided by statute. In other words, take away the protections for straight and LGBT kids from bullying, and the nondiscrimination rules for district employees.” Ethington said that Buttars’ resolution would be a key focus of the planned “This Is Your Voice” rally, which is scheduled for the session’s opening on Jan. 24.  Q

Services as diverse as the community we serve

Q safety Being heard without being arrested By Officer Adam Schall


any protests were held last year by many different people from many different walks of life. The subject matter varied greatly. Some issues being protested did not seem important to some of us — but to those protesting, the issues were the most important to them at the time. They felt that their voice should be heard on the issue. This is a basic and fundamental part of living in the United States. Free speech is not only a right to possess, but also one to be exercised. The purpose of this article is to explain some processes and communication tools to use when dealing with authorities. These tools and this article are meant to help delineate a “line not to cross” which could end up in arrest. It is important to illustrate this line because to be an effective protester you need to be able to approach the line as closely as possible without crossing it. Most of this article will be in reference to Salt Lake City and protesting within its jurisdiction. This is simply because most protests occur in this area and for the most part not within other areas of the Salt Lake Valley or the state for the matter. The same principles can, however, apply to other jurisdictions. Salt Lake City has a “Special Event Freedom of Expression” link on the city website. Salt Lake City terms its protest permit “Freedom of Expression.” The permit usually includes a $5 fee for processing. When organizing a protest the city prefers two weeks notice of the event by processing this permit. The permit copies are sent out by the city Event Department to all other city agencies to be involved with the event if needed. There are two types of permits. A commercial permit can be denied because it charges for admission and makes money. An expression permit is protesting without making money and therefore will not be denied by the city unless you are already in violation of the law with the protest underway. Things to think about when going to fill out a protest application include: Request for sidewalk or street closure Whether music or loudspeakers will be used Temporary structures being erected Food/drink served Two weeks’ notice is preferred as a courtesy to Salt Lake City. This allows for better organization and communication between government entities and protestors — as well as cooperation. Protests are not denied, however, because they are last-minute. A permit may be denied because it does not have time to be processed, but the city still cannot stop the protest for this reason. If a last-minute protest is organized and people turn out, it will not be chased off by the

• Headaches • Back or neck pain • Arm or leg pain (sciatica) • Effects of scoliosis police department unless the protestors are breaking the law. Things the city and law enforcement can regulate regarding the protest are also listed on the permit and are listed as guidelines. These include how big posters and signs can be — as well as the size of the sticks holding up the signs. There are many ways to have your protest be successful — as well as many ways to avoid yourself or members of your protest from getting into trouble. Generally, city ordinances cover penalties for breaking the law during a protest. These include disorderly conduct, blocking public thoroughfares, making threats, assault and inciting a riot. A good example of not blocking a thoroughfare was a protest at the site of the LDS Temple in downtown Salt Lake City. The protestors had lain head-to-toe along the sidewalk surrounding the property. They were not, however, blocking the sidewalk entirely. Since the public was still able to use the sidewalk, the protestors had not violated the law. Signs and things protestors are stating must be directed in general toward an issue or position and not directed in a threatening manner toward a specific person. As soon as a person is singled out with aggressive comments it becomes threats, harassment and potentially inciting. Communication is key to a protest being successful and not feeling harassed by the police department. One suggestion would be to establish a few responsible members of the protest to regulate the other group members. They can be identified by all wearing the same color shirts. These members can communicate with the police when there is a problem and help regulate their group to aid in fixing the problem. This gives the police a member or members to speak with about the problem instead of yelling at the crowd and trying to get the mass to listen. Problems usually involve a quick and simple fix which can be quickly and simply remedied by effective communication. Another part of communication is attitude. Remember the police officers on scene are citizens just like you are. Many of them share the same opinions you may be expressing through your protest. So when an officer asks you to move do not respond with “I’m not moving, why should I?” because you most likely get a negative response like, “because I told you.” Instead, a more productive response would be “Where can/should I move to?” Protesting is an effective way to exercise our right to free speech and public assembly in our great democracy. It is an effective way to bring attention to a cause and to communicate with those in governance. Hopefully some of the above dialogue can be helpful for you and your protest in the future. Adam Schall is a member of LBGT Public Safety Committee representing the Salt Lake County Sheriff’s Office.

J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 23

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Momix Botanica See Jan.22

Dance Craze by Tony Hobday

Writer’s block sucks! The brain is just empty ... I’m sure you’re saying to yourself “oh big stretch, Tony,” but let me tell you, it’s like being celibate ... completely celibate ... for more than two days — it’s maddening, and lonely. I’m just glad both my occassional writer’s block and celibacy don’t last long ... like the movie Avatar, that’s just too long ... and maddening.


thursday — The

Sundance Film Festival starts today, and there are plenty of great films to be seen. But there’s more than just movies — stargazing, freezing your tush off, parties sponsored by Queer Lounge, parties in the streets, parties in your pants ... what? Don’t miss this event, you have a chance of meeting flamers, I mean famers such as Ashley Judd, Thomas Dekker (yum!), Rob Lowe and even Miss Ross ... holy shit! Times, venues & events vary, through Jan. 30, Park City. For more information and ticketing, visit, and


FRIday — Sugar Space and SB

Dance Company present The Neta Dance Company: 2280 Pints, which is inspired by “A Day Like Any Other,” a retrospective of Brazilian visual artist, Rivane Neuenschwander. The production will feature 30 performers, 80 buckets, wild music, hot action and bucket magic ... hmmm, I’m oddly turned on by it. 8pm, through Saturday, Black Box Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $12, 801-355-ARTS or


saturday — MOMIX, a dance company known for its exceptional inventiveness and physical beauty, presents Botanica, which transforms the theatre into a breathtaking fantasyland, delighting the audience a special brand of stage magic. Using spellbinding choreography, large-scale puppets and larger-than-life props Botanica evokes a vivid landscape of childlike wonder brought to life by a cast of dancer-illusionists. 7:30pm, Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E. Presidents Cir., UofU. Tickets $16.75–39.50, 801-581-7100 or

QQ Local artist Trevor Southey gives prominence to four life passages that have defined Southey’s character and art, in the exhibit Reconciliation: his youth in Rhodesia and education in England; his life as a married, practicing Mormon and his desire for a utopian lifestyle created around family, farming, and art. Gain insight into this retrospective exhibition during Conversations with Artist Trevor Southey, and get a chance to meet this amazing and talented artist. 2pm, today and Jan. 29, Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Dr., UofU. Free, 801-581-7332 or


Monday — Returning for

a third season is RuPaul’s Drag Race, featuring a dozen drag queen extraordinaires wigging out (no pun intended) on camera and being catty on the runway, trying to win the the coveted title. I’m shooting for Delta Work or India Ferrah (she looks like Alexis Colby). Catch the new season on the big screen at Club Try-Angles starting tonight, hosted by drag bartender extraordinaire Jimmy Mybackdoor. 7pm, Mondays throughout the season, Club TryAngles, 251 W. 900 South. Free, 801-364-3203.


tuesday — There’s a “new

way to think about dance in Salt Lake City;” it’s called loveDANCEmore, and their new presentation dancedance: a gallery of video is a new film event that features dance films and videos from choreographers across the globe. these projects span a wide variety of genres. some are award winning, some are new, some are traditional, some are experimental, some are old, some are projected, some are on i-phones & old tv players. Times vary, through Jan. 30, Hive Gallery at Trolley Square, 367 S. 700 East. Tickets $5–10 at the door,

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thursday — Keith

Lockhart returns to conduct the Utah Symphony in Stravinsky’s Pulcinella, a witty, neo-classical piece composed in 1920. The performance will also include Bizet’s Carmen Suites and Adamo’s beautiful and virtuosic Harp Concerto. 10am today, 8pm Fri. & Sat., Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple. Tickets $15/Thurs. and $15–85/Fri. & Sat., 801-355-ARTS or


friday — Where can you

find 200 white balloons, 24 hula hoops, 18 bouncing volleyballs and one giant weather balloon all in one place? Miss Ross’s hair!?! Tehehe ... actually with Ririe-Woodbury Dance Company. This family friendly performance of CIRCLE CYCLE revolves around anything round. Life is not only full of circles but cycles ... endless cycles of life. Beginnings becoming endings, endings becoming beginnings. 7pm, through Saturday, Capitol Theatre, 50 W. 200 South. Tickets $30, 801-355-ARTS or arttix. org.


tuesday — Thirty-two-year-old

musician Amos Lee returns to the Utah stage, and I’m so excited about it. I saw him the last time he was here, and the boy can freakin’ sing, girl! His style is a mix of folk, R&B and jazz ... it’s fabulous. He’s here promoting his fourth album Mission Bell. Go check him out, it’s totally worth it. 8pm, The Depot, 400 W. South Temple. Tickets $21/adv.–$26/day of show, 801-467-8499 or QQ Unfortunately this band that I absolutely adore is playing the same night ... poopoo! Anyhoo, The Plain White T’s is a Grammynominated pop rock group whose hit songs

include “Hey There Delilah,” “Natural Disaster” and “Rhythm of Love.” This concert will probably be worth it too, so I’ll leave it to your discretion ... mwah! 6pm, In The Venue, 219 S. 600 West. Tickets $17/adv.–$20/day of show, 801-467-8499 or QQ Gay composer/lyricist Stephen Sondheim is the most important artist to work in American musical theater during the past half-century. In this intimate conversation, An Evening with Stephen Sondheim, he offers a personal and engaging view of his career, the state of American musical theater and his own creative process, from early collaborations to masterworks. 7:30pm, Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E. President’s Cir., UofU. Tickets $20.50–$75, 801-581-7100 or


Wednesday — Salt Lake

Acting Company presents the world premiere of Kathleen Cahill’s The Persian Quarter, in which a diplomatic crisis and a chance encounter trigger revelations of a shared past. The play unfolds on the final day of the Iranian hostage crisis in 1980 with Anne, an American hostage and Shirin, an Iranian revolutionary student who is one of her captors. Thirty years later, their daughters meet accidentally in an empty classroom at Columbia University during the visit of Iranian President Ahmadinejad. 7:30pm, Salt Lake Acting Company, 168 W. 500 North. Tickets $15–41, 801-363-7522 or

UPCOMING EVENTS FEB 14 Sarah McLachlan, Kingsbury Hall MAR 12 Pilobolus, Park City APR 16 Lily Tomlin, Kingsbury Hall APR 20 David Sedaris, Kingsbury Hall

save the date January 20–30 Sundance Film Festival, Park City February 18–20 QUAC Ski-N-Swim February 27 UAF Oscar Night March 19 sWerve’s St. Patty’s Day Party April Queer Prom utahpridecenter. org April 15 Day of Silence April 24 PWACU’s Spring Fling May Hey Look Us Over by the Salt Lake Men’s Choir, saltlakemenschoir. org June 3–5 Utah Pride Festival utahpridecenter. org June 23–26 Utah Arts Festival August PWACU River Trip August 4–7 Park City Arts Festival kimballartcenter. org August 20 Equality Utah Allies Dinner

theatre review ‘Tuna’ is more oil than water By Tony Hobday


he great state of texas, my birthplace — El Paso, to be exact — is known for its radical residents like Sandra Day O’Connor, George W. Bush, Anna Nicole Smith, Wanda Holloway and the inhabitants of the small fictional town of Greater Tuna, Texas. (I’m so proud to be a Texan!) As a sidebar, according to the Texas State Historical Association, there once was a town called Tuna in Texas that was inhabited from the late 1800s to the mid-1900s. The comedy play Greater Tuna is the 1980’s brainchild of Jaston Williams, Joe Sears and Ed Howard — also radical Texans, but radical satirists to the state’s ultra-conservatism. Wasatch Theatre Company’s production of this two-man (performed by Charles Lynn Frost and John Rowland) show opened last week to a modest, yet friendly audience in the Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center’s intimate Studio Theatre. Director Sallie Cooper, a WTC principal, does a fine job in keeping to the offbeat tone and tempo of the play — opening with OKKK radio commentators, Thurston and Arles, airing the day’s dirty laundry of Greater Tuna, and guiding us through trials and tribulations of backward, small-town hicks. Frost and Rowland tackle another dozen or so characters throughout the 90-minute show with the style and pizazz of a West Texas waltz. Of course, Frost is cast as Mrs. Bumiller, a frumpy mother of two teenagers and a devout member of the Smut Snatchers of the New Order, whose many tasks include censorship of school literature. Although Frost makes a great Mrs. Bumiller, achy southern drawl and all, it’s difficult not to mix her up with Sister Dottie Dixon (if you’ve seen her). Rowland’s characters include Petey, a puppy pusher with a profound lisp, who works for the local humane society, and Snavely, the town drunk who claims to have seen a UFO — though, this not all that creative of a character. I found both Frost and Rowland enjoyable to watch, but Rowland was more animated, which made his characters a bit more fun; plus his interpretation of a whining puppy was frighteningly good. The set, designed by Kit Anderson, was well-considered for the space of the theater and gives an adequate sense of the surrounding. The set is also riddled with props: telephone, michrophone, radio tower, coat rack, kitchen table/coffin; and yet there is also the use of imaginary props and animals, which is interesting. The costumes, designed by Linda Eyring, are typical rural American, where clothes shopping consists only at Kmart and JCPenney. And though several costume changes take place on stage, which isn’t my favorite, Rowland and Frost make it look taskless. Overall, WTC’s Greater Tuna conjures only a few laughs and mild applause, mainly I think due to the show’s out-dated material — it’s more than 25 years old. To be honest I haven’t raved about WTC’s productions over the last couple of years, but here, I’m a little disappointed that this small company that has a history of bold choices like Boys in the Band and the obscure The Sugar Bean Sisters didn’t keep to their more risky productions, which I’ve admired in the past. Greater Tuna runs through Jan. 29 at the Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets are $18, 801-355-ARTS or

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J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 25


restaurant review Fratelli Ristorante: Two brothers in Sandy By Chef Drew Ellsworth


or a very long time I’ve been wanting to go to Fratelli Ristorante in the south end of Salt Lake Valley, and last weekend, my long-awaited visit came to fruition. Brad Di Iorio and I drove out to a new retail park located in Sandy’s old quarry district. For someone who grew up thinking that there was really nothing south of Murray or Midvale, I was proven wrong once again. Salt Lake has grown into a huge new metro area where people can shop and dine without ever venturing out of their neighborhoods — Fratelli is proof of this fact. The restaurant, though in a strip mall, is modern and elegant. You’re greeted in the entry by a soothing water feature and high ceilings. The floors are stained concrete slabs arranged in various color patterns, and there is a nice configuration of tables and booths. Modern lighting hangs from the ceiling sporting beautiful Italian glass shades that add good light where you need it, and romantic light everywhere else. The restrooms, or at least the men’s room is spacious, immaculately clean and is appointed with a lot of travertine marble and darkly painted walls — I was impressed. One thing Brad and I both noted was a sort of noisy din during the busiest part of the night; we were seated next to a man with a booming voice and we heard every bit of his conversation. You know, there are two thoughts about noise in a restaurant — sometimes it’s what you want because it does make you feel like you’re in a happening place, but sometimes it’s just annoying. It was Saturday night and Fratelli was busy, which is a good thing. Brad and I chose drinks off the cocktail menu while we were waiting to be seated in a booth.

Brad enjoyed a Martini laced with Chambord and I had a White Tuscan, an Italianate version of the White Russian. Both drinks were delicious and calmed us down from a very busy day at work. There iss a long bar with plenty of swiveling chairs available as a waiting area. (I really liked this idea because in many popular places, the waiting area is never big enough on a busy night and you all stand or sit uncomfortably crammed together which distracts from the experience of dining out — Fratelli’s seems to have solved this problem.) Fratelli is owned by Dan and Pete Canella who are the children of Salt Lake restaurant royalty. They are the nephews of Joe Canella, who passed away a few years ago, and are cousins to the Canella clan, famous for the downtown eatery called Canella’s. (This is another place in downtown Salt Lake City I love to go.) I was impressed by the wine list which had shown a lot of thought and I was happy to see many Italian wine choices. I brought an elegant Planeta Syrah from Sicily which was light, luscious and could not have been more appropriate for our food. I hope this wine will come back to the state soon since it was discontinued a few years ago. Dan and Pete were preparing several sample appetizers for us so while we were waiting we enjoyed some house-baked bread. There was very special extra virgin olive oil on the table with thick and sweet balsamic vinegar for dipping. We were also served a delicious salad of organic arugula in a light, citrus vinaigrette topped with shaved fennel, hand cut orange sections and really tasty shredded Parmesan — a very nice beginning. After our salad we were treated to a amusebouche plate with a sample of Fratelli’s

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ing for the pork — I may have liked them more signature tomato bisque laced with creamy mascarpone cheese, and a tasty bite of a as a side dish. And our second entrée was Veal cheese focaccia. But what really got our attenMarsala: tender, pounded scaloppini in a dry tion was a trio of house-made gnocchi which, in Marsala sauce with porcini mushrooms served my view was the highlight of our meal. Gnocchi over linguini. From my perspective, the seasonis soft, creamy potato dumplings that are hard ing was off on the veal dish — it was flavored to make, in that they can easily with cinnamon, lemon juice and be doughy and gummy. You have capers which, I thought, took to come up with just the right Fratelli Ristorante away from the flavor of the mushconsistency for the little darlings rooms. In my view there were just to hold together, while keeping too many flavors here, I would 9236 S Village Shop Dr that melt-in-your-mouth quality. Mon–Thurs: 11 am–9 pm have liked the mushrooms and Fratelli got it right. The trio plate the wine flavors to dominate, but Fri–Sat: 11 am–10 pm also had three delicious and quite they didn’t. CHEF DREW’S SCORE: 89.5 classical sauces which dressed We were served for dessert a the gnocchi. Bolognese sauce is very nice sampler plate of Italian a tomato and meat sauce topped Gelato and sorbet — a lovely and with fresh herbs, gorgonzola/cream sauce with refreshing end to our evening. fresh spinach and walnuts, and beautifully In spite of the mild criticism, Brad and I made pesto — yummy! enjoyed our experience and were greeted with Ken, our waiter had interested us in the warmth and enthusiasm. Fratelli is truly worth a pork tenderloin entrée which was lightly ladled visit; the menu is extensive with pizzas, pasta, with a honey glaze and served with Brussels salads and classical Italian entrees, and I really sprouts in pancetta. The pork was plated in a need to go again soon. If you live in the south pool of polenta which was creamy, cheesy and end of the valley, Fratelli is certainly a place flavorful. I have to say that, although I loved the you’ll need to go to again and again. Many sprouts, I thought they were a little overpowerplates are in the $11–$13 range. Q

dining guide Frida Bistro Sophisticated Mexican cuisine, wine and spirits 545 W. 700 South 801-983-6692 Loco Lizard Cantina Serious mexican food since 1999 at Kimball Junction. 1612 Ute Blvd., Park City 435-645-7000 Off Trax Café Coffee, wi-fi and pool 259 W 900 South 801‑364‑4307

Omar’s Rawtopia Restaurant Organic live food 2148 S. Highland Dr. 801‑486‑0332 Sage’s Cafe The freshest and healthiest cuisine possible 473 E 300 South 801‑322‑3790 Tin Angel Cafe Local food, music, art. Serving lunch, dinner and Saturday brunch 365 W 400 South 801‑328-4155

Trolley Wing Company We’re Back! Open daily noon to 11pm 550 S 700 East 801-538-0745 Vertical Diner Vegetarian restaurant open seven days a week 10 a.m.–9 p.m. 2280 S West Temple 801‑484‑8378 To get listed in this section, please call 801‑649‑6663 and ask for Brad or e-mail brad@



Learn about great wines and great food Wine taught by Wasatch Academy of Wine’s Sheral Schowe, and staff Food taught by Chef Drew Ellsworth, Certified Executive Chef Sunday, January 23

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Learn how to make fresh bread and pastries in every class! Monday, February 21

PRESIDENT’S DAY TRIBUTE Our Best Cherry Pie and Early American Cuisine

Monday night classes $35 or 3 for $95 Sunday night wine classes $40 plus $15 the night of the class or $110 for three.

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FOR MORE INFORMATION ON CLASSES CATERING AND CULINARY PARTIES: 801-278-1039 J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 27

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theatre review Brighten your day with ‘Black Comedy’

Alexander Weisman

By Tony Hobday


nglish playwright Peter Shaffer is probably best known for his dramatic plays, such as Amadeus and Equus (the 2007 revival starring Daniel Radcliffe who stirred controversy for his nude scene). On the other hand, Shaffer’s comedies are of the same caliber as many British farces, like those seen on the BBC (British Broadcasting Corporation). His 1965 Black Comedy is currently lighting up the Utah stage, put on by the Pioneer Theatre Company — one of the most consistently good theatre groups. The one-act play opens with a few minutes of complete darkness on stage as a couple prepares for a dinner party — presumably moving about easily and complimenting the look of each other and the furniture. Suddenly, the stage flood lights flip on, glaring as a train’s headlight, and the couple starts bumbling around, unable to see anything in their “complete darkness.” This “reverse lighting” technique obviously changes the perception, in a physically humorous way, and is the essence of Black Comedy. Brindsley (Michael Brusasco) is a struggling sculptor who recently became engaged to his fiancée Carol, who’s a little rough around the edges. The couple has invited Carol’s military father Colonel Melkett (Greg Thornton) to Brindsley’s “flat” to share the news of their impending nuptials. Before the colonel arrives, they first replace what little furnishings Brindsley owns with acrossthe-hall gay neighbor Harold’s (Donald Corren) expensive, antique furniture — who happens to be out of town; all to impress Carol’s father, as well as an arts dealer (Steven Fehr) who’s also been invited to see Brindsley’s work. Of course the evening is muddled by a power outage, a nosy and intoxicated neighbor (Joyce

Cohen), a slow-witted electrician (Lenny Wolpe) the early return of Harold and the unexpected arrival of Brindsley’s ex-girlfriend Clea (Lauren Elise McCord), in hope of getting back together. Sound chaotic? As any farce should be, and it’s done superbly. The stunt choreography by Dale Anthony Girard is oddly graceful in its execution; Carol’s timid acension of the stairs in the dark and Brindsley’s tumble down them are hilarious in their genuity. The ensemble cast is like moving parts of a well-oiled machine, gliding around and between each other in comic clarity. Brusasco’s performance as a deceptive charlatan is slapstick heaven; Wolpe’s inappropriate appreciation of Brindsley’s sculptures is comic genius; Thornton’s military reverberance booms; and Moulton’s “pretty-girl with an unpolished demeanor” is incredibly funny. Costume designer Carol Wells-Day fittingly ... well execpt for Moulton’s too-high-hemmed dress, which I’m sure was not an accident ... dresses the cast in 1960’s attire congruent with the characters’ personalities — especially Harold’s outfit, a cross between Autin Powers and Gumby. And William Barlcay, the set designer, creates a functional surrounding for the constant movement of the actors. I’m a huge fan of British farce and physical comedy, which is basically one-in-the-same, and there is plenty of it in Black Comedy. The wacky, light-heartedness of Black Comedy should brighten your day.  Q

Black Comedy lights up the stage through Jan. 29, Pioneer Theatre, 300 S. 1400 East, UofU, Tickets available at 801-581-6961 or




Feb. 26




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30 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 17 2 | J a nua r y 20, 2011

Life After ‘A-List’ Reichen Lehmkuhl candidly talks reality TV regrets, DADT and ex Lance Bass’ career copycats By Chris Azzopardi


ome people had a hard time sitting through The A-List: New York, Logo’s tawdry teledoc about a gay gaggle that got eye-roll reactions from viewers who couldn’t completely look away. Imagine starring in it. Reichen Lehmkuhl, who became the show’s punching bag for nasty names, looks back with regret that you didn’t see him like you should have. But he’s learned to get on with his life and focus his attention on the future — one that includes a film based on his first book (a follow-up to 2006’s Here’s What We’ll Say: Growing Up, Coming Out, and the U.S. Air Force is in the works) and exploring other avenues of his bottomless ambition as a political activist, model, musician and jeweler (seriously, he has his own line). In a recent chat with Lehmkuhl, the 37-year-old got personal about his hurt feelings, how the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell affected him, his book-turned-movie, and his take on ex-boyfriend Lance Bass seemingly copying his career. You were called a lot of nasty names for your behavior on The A-List: New York. How do you feel about the way Logo cast you?  It hurts. If it didn’t hurt, I think there’d be something wrong with me. I see myself differently. Clearly when I look at my life I see myself being raised in a trailer park and breaking into a successful military career, serving my country and

graduating from the Air Force Academy. After getting out and writing a book that sticks up for our entire community and cries out for help from everyone to get rid of a policy that’s going to help a lot of other anti-gay policies fall, to see anyone in the community turn around and call me a douche bag, it just makes me say, “Wow.” I watch A-List with different eyes, I’m sure. I guess if I were watching the show from those people’s eyes, maybe I would think I was a douche bag, too. How is it balancing serious stances on issues like DADT and then doing a reality show like A-List?  (Laughs) It’s really hard, because with a show like A-List the cameras are on us for five months — 3,600 hours over the summer just of me — and you probably saw, over 10 episodes, maybe three hours. Imagine what they can do. I tell people, “Don’t talk to me about editing until you’ve done a reality TV show, because you don’t know what you’re talking about.” Out of 3,600 hours, you take three hours of that and you make a person whatever you want them to be. A show like A-List doesn’t want to show anything that’s boring and not what people are tuning in for. They want the things that are sensationalized, and we understand. We signed up for this and we understand what they’re going to do. I wish I could just tell people, “That’s not the way it is.” But you look even more stupid sticking up for yourself, so I’ve learned to just let it go. You said you’re surprised by some of the reactions, but you also said you knew what you were getting into. Do you have regrets about doing the show? Would you do a second season?  Umm... I don’t know. They haven’t even said yet if there will be a second season, so we haven’t really thought about it yet. I think that there are definitely some regrets. There are moments when I think, “Wow, we shouldn’t have even given them that.” A show can make you look like you’re hitting on someone in a club, but the editing doesn’t let you see that it’s your friend of 13 years. (Laughs) Suddenly, you’re hitting on someone in the club because you’re having a conversation and saying it’s too bad someone’s leaving the next day. That’s terrible, and it’s hard. Even doing my song (“Up to the Sky,” a DADT protest tune), they showed the one moment where I really screwed up, and anyone who’s a singer screws up. They took that and ran it over and over and over, and it ruined any credibility that I had to sing or to have a

song or to try to do something good. You see the tragic part, and that’s it. Had I known it was going to be so negative, I wouldn’t have done any of that on camera. I would’ve kept it as a very private part of my life and just released a song on my own, because now a lot of people won’t even download the song. They’re judging it based on what they saw on the TV show. Would you like to continue to pursue music?  Um, yeah. I think I’d love to record more songs. I play the guitar all the time. I’ve been playing the guitar since I was 7, but the show makes it look like I am 7. (Laughs) If I did record more songs, I would never ever do it on the show. It was a humiliating experience for me when I set out for it to be really great project from the heart and to make a difference. Do you look online for buzz about you?  I used to. I used to care, and after a few years you realize it doesn’t matter and that it’s just a handful of people who are negative that are actually drawn to those kinds of blogs and websites. The majority of people are normal. As someone personally affected by Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, how did you feel when you heard it was repealed?  There are no words to describe how I felt. It was 3:30 on the East Coast on Dec. 18, and I’ll never forget it: I had a few friends over here, we were watching C-SPAN like it was the Super Bowl. The verdict really lit a new fire under me for the integration of LGBTQ people in the military, because now we have ground to stand on to get this done, and I feel like it’s just the beginning of integration. Now it’s really up to our community to watch like hawks these people who are integrating the military and to make sure they do it correctly; if they do it too slowly, if they do it right and if they don’t enforce it the way it should be enforced, we need to watch for that. We really need to be careful not to say, “Oh, that’s all done,” and wash our hands of it. If this repeal had taken place while you were serving in the military, how do you think it would’ve affected you? Oh man — at this point, if I were still in, I would be so anxious about when I could come out, and I think I would probably be leading the barrage to get every servicemember who is gay to come out now. The more people who come out, the bigger problem they have with keeping us in. There’s an estimated 60,000 to 70,000 LGBT troops serving right now, and that’s just people who’ve admitted it on survey forms. If all those people came out, it would send really big waves through the squadrons and it would just normalize everything. It would say, “Hey, we’re here, everything’s cool. I’m the same guy

you’ve known, but if you ask what I did this past weekend you’re going to hear the truth rather than a lie.” I really wish I could go back in right now. I don’t know if it was a moment of insanity or a moment of nostalgia, but I thought, “I wonder if I could investigate what it would be like for me to go back into the military and serve again.” But then I thought I would be a captain still, because I got out as a captain, and I would be 10 years older than all the other captains. That might be a little weird, but the thought’s crossed my mind. Regarding Obama, you’ve said he’s failed you. Does the repeal of DADT restore your faith in him?  No, because he didn’t do anything to make it happen. And the thing is, when President Obama had the Justice Department appeal the decision of the court ruling to end the ban, which he was under no obligation to do, he risked having this policy maybe another two years, maybe another six years if we didn’t get it passed just now. If there wasn’t so much hype from everybody who was screaming — from me to all my friends on Twitter to all these huge organizations that we’ve spent entirely too much money to support because of this crap and this horrible ban — and if that hadn’t happened in the lame-duck session, we would be screwed. So yeah, I still have no faith in him, because he brought us to that point. I hear all these excuses being made for him, but I’m not going to apologize for him because I’m a Democrat. Your book’s being turned into a film, and names like Chace Crawford and Taylor Lautner are allegedly being considered for the lead. Who would you want to play you?  You know what, it’s not my call. I want whomever the casting director says should play me. Those are names that were on the shortlist and that are on a list, and there are a lot of other great names. Like who?  Well, that’s the thing. That’s not something I’m going to talk about yet, because it’s pointless. I’m not going to give names of people who aren’t even going to be involved in the project.

I’m wondering how you feel about certain people also making movies about their lives. And, you know, taking over a role that was once yours in a play called My Big Gay Italian Wedding.  (Coyly laughing) Um. You know, I don’t even care. I just don’t care. I hear chatter, and I wish Lance very well. Will you see his movie when it comes out?  (Laughs) Maybe if I’m invited I’ll go see it. I mean, I’m not against it. I have no ill-will toward him.

But didn’t you at one point?  I think when people break up, they break up for a reason. Usually those reasons are confined to personal space, and we were in a more public situation — so things got out and made it look like more than it was. Our relationship was a couple of months, and it was so long ago. A-List made it look like we just dated; it’s ridiculous. That’s ancient history.  Q

The 2011 QPages will be published in May 2011. Call to get rates


1 1 0 2 Y A G ’S


My vote’s for Taylor Lautner. He has your abs.  (Laughs) It would be interesting. All the people that casting has lined up are great actors or up-and-coming actors who I would love to see play a gay role. Whomever plays you, it must just be cool to have a movie made about your life.  I don’t even think about it being made about my life. The main character is not named Reichen, it’s not like that. It’s a story based on my life, and the lead of the movie is going to represent what happened to every gay cadet that was in the Air Force Academy.

J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 3 1


Together Again

44 James Dean’s East of Eden role Across 47 Areas for Dr. Callie  1 Cinderella’s comingTorres out party 48 Dog or work area  5 North Sea feeder 50 Young man’s part in  9 Gertrude Stein’s A Shakespeare’s day Long Gay Book, for one 52 Respond to the cold 13 Where to find Moby Dick 55 A Streetcar ___ Desire 14 Takes advantage of 56 She played Celie in pupils? 16-Across 15 Heavy burden 58 Band in Boston 16 Movie based on an 59 Feisty female in The Alice Walker novel Lion King 19 Punished for illegal 60 Ziegfeld Follies cosparking tume designer 20 W. or H., to Auden 61 Sexy clothing material 21 Rubber 62 Eat beaver-style 23 Like a really big shoe 63 Young miss 24 Butt 26 Wilder’s The Bridge of Down  1 Pancake mixture San Luis ___  2 Away from one’s first 27 Bernstein’s fifth mate 29 Cylinders for thread  3 Street named for 31 You, to Frida writer Harper? 33 Start of a  4 Shoestrings Shakespearean title  5 Immigrant ed. choice 34 She played Sofia in  6 Fifth-century pope 16-Across  7 Swiss capital 38 Burl of Cat on a Hot  8 Makes out Tin Roof  9 Gay-friendly singer 39 The active crowd Amos 40 Break off 10 Conditionally out 43 Mysore Mr.

11 Megan of Will & Grace 12 Tongue ending 17 Ukrainian seaport 18 Sch. in Dianne HardyGarcia’s home state 22 Kind of IRA 25 Copies of a women’s magazine 28 Like porn 30 Crew tools 31 Bear that may be a minor 32 God in Granada 34 Rubber 35 Where to find real bitches 36 Big name in soft balls 37 ___ of Dorothy 38 Oft-broken promise 41 Illegal block by Esera Tuaola 42 In possession of 44 Mapplethorpe’s tool 45 Gives a heads-up to 46 Precarious places 49 Started out 51 Nancy Clue creator Maney 53 ___ Hashana 54 Marlene’s Blue Angel role 56 Secretary’s stat 57 Jude of The Talented Mr. Ripley Puzzle answers on page 36

anagram An anagram is a word or phrase that can be made using the letters from another word or phrase. Rearrange the letters below to answer:

Name the play in which local actor Charles Lynn Frost is currently starring.

uneager tart _______



32 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 17 2 | J a nua r y 20, 2011

Q doku


Q doku

Level: Easy

Level: Hard

Q health

7 3

Is it prostatitis, an STD or both? By Lynn Beltran


Each Sudoku a unique solution which one can be logically blank puzzle spaces.has Every row must contain of reached each digit, as must withouteach guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 intoQdoku the blank spaces. Every column and each 3x3 square. is actually five row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. connected, puzzles. Qdoku separate, is actually but five separate, butSudoku connected, Sudoku puzzles.

am going to start this article with prostatitis 101, with the caveat that I am really branching out from STDs and into urology (the study of the male urinary tract) when I do. Although the former is really more of my area, I often have prostate-related conditions as well as STDs. This leads to much difficulty in trying to understand the relationship between the two issues, and in recognizing appropriate prevention strategies for maintaining good prostate and sexual health. The prostate is a very small gland that sits below the bladder and rectum. It is essentially responsible for helping to produce semen and is critical in transporting urine and semen to the penis. It is recommended that all men get a digital prostate exam once a year to check for abnormalities such as swelling, irritation and lumps. Prostatitis, as the name implies, means there is some sort of inflammation of the prostate that is leading to disease. While prostatitis may be an acute or chronic issue, this diagnosis is often quite complex. Depending on who you talk to or what you read, you may find differing opinions about the details of prostatitis. However, there is some general agreement that identifies three or four possible sources of disease: bacterial infection, an immune system disorder, a nervous system disorder or a traumatic injury. Additionally, some of the general symptoms include things like pain or discomfort when urinating, needing to urinate more frequently, having difficulty urinating, pain in the stomach, penis or groin area and painful ejaculations. Long-term consequences of prostatitis may include erectile dysfunction. If you have been paying attention to my

articles over the past two years, you may have noticed that these symptoms are very similar to those that appear when diagnosing an STD. So you can probably see how many patients struggle to understand whether they need to get checked for an STD or see a urologist. The answer may be to do both. My first message to all men is to protect your prostate! Do the things that you can do. First, avoid traumatic injury to your parts. Since prostatitis is a common condition among HIVpositive individuals, stay on top of your prostate health if you are HIV positive. And if you are not HIV positive, protect yourself from HIV by using condoms during rectal sex. Condoms provide very effective protection from HIV, which is a known risk factor for prostatitis. Condoms will also protect you from developing a urethral bacterial infection. Bacterial infections that start here can lead to prostatitis when the bacteria leaks from the urethra into the prostate. Quite frankly, chronic or persistent urethral infection can then lead to chronic prostatitis. How and when this occurs is where things get a little murky, but what I can say is that many men who have tested positive multiple times for an STD tell me they have been diagnosed with prostatitis. The research also shows there is a link between the two. Using a condom during rectal sex is something that you can do, and it will not only protect you from acquiring an STD, it will also protect your prostate. Most of all, get your annual prostate exam. If you are experiencing any of the problems listed above, understand that resolving them may not be as simple as diagnosing an STD and popping a pill. Even if the root cause of your prostatitis is a bacterial infection, an infection becomes much more difficult to treat once the prostate is involved. If you are diagnosed and treated for an STD, yet symptoms persist, it is likely time to consult a urologist. Q

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3 5 6 1 2 4 9 6 3 9 7 1 4 2 9 7 3 8 7 3 6 9 2 4 5 4 9 6 5 4 7 2 8 7 5 1 4 9 1 2 5 7


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5 6

Cryptogram A Cryptogram is a puzzle where one letter in the puzzle is substituted with another. For example: ECOLVGNCYXW YCR EQYIIRZNBZN YZU PSZ! Has the solution: CRYPTOGRAMS ARE CHALLENGING AND FUN! In the above example e’s are all replaced by c’s. The puzzle is solved by recognizing letter patterns in a word or words and successively substituting letters until the solution is reached. This week’s hint: D=I Theme: Gene’s saying


_____ _____ ___ _ _ _ _ _ _ ’_ _ _ _ _

KRCL is home to public affairs programming that's focused on inclusion Ð not exclusion Ð and presenting alternative viewpoints. Tune in for RadioActive every week night, your chance to participate in the conversations that affect the LGBT and allied community. Be a part of KRCL.

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5 8 9 7 1 5 2 4 1 9 8 6 4 9 8 1

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Q giggles

J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 33


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7 4 8 3 2 7 5 1 9 2 8 6 8 1 4 9 6 4 9 2

Anagram An anagram is a word or phrase that can be made using the letters from another word or phrase. Rearrange the letters below to answer: Who’s turning five?

GAY BURNT CELLS ____ ___-______

Q giggles


cocktail chatter The Pomegranate Cocktail By Ed Sikov


will! I will! I-I wi-ill!” I sang wildly off-key in the shower, where only the Korean family next door and the lesbian phlebotomist with the Phyllis

Diller wig below us could hear me. Also Bruce, who was making honking noises outside the

A cryptogram is a puzzle where one letter in the puzzle is substituted with another. For example: ECOLVGNCYXW YCR EQYIIRZNBZN YZU PSZ! Has the solution: CRYPTOGRAMS ARE CHALLENGING AND FUN! In the above example Es are all replaced by Cs. The puzzle is solved by recognizing letter patterns in words and successively substituting letters until the solution is reached.


This week’s hint: X = K, Theme: Quote by author Stephanie Coontz on gay marriage equality. Cvwwnvpm hvg vuwmvla bmmf wvlnevuua iwvfgszwcml nf v kva ihvi cvxmg pva cvwwnvpm fzi zfua nfmqnivbum bti vugz rtnim uzpnevu.



_ _ _ _

apy, I accepted Craig and Kyle’s affair. Therapist Gary and I aired the musty



and eventually the stink of emotional rot receded. I’d been half right: My from my mother, my dick and my creationist-like

_ _ _ denial of aging. Having unearthed them, I achieved






_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ namaste”!



_ _ _ _ _ _ _ enlightenment. ”Om shanti This Nirvana was admit-


_ _ _ _ _ _ _ . tedly eccentric. I stopped swiping sleeping pills from

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3 4 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 17 2 | J a nua r y 20, 2011

pomegranate juice (oh, squeeze my ass!) but for adding pomegranate molasses. What? Waltz into Costco and inquire as to the whereabouts of the pomegranate molasses? I’d sooner slap on an Elizabeth I wig and ask for the mead department. I adapted the recipe for those of us who are not deranged. Lo: it worked! We all

roots of my breakdown,

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ puke-green jealousy came

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


bathroom door. It didn’t bother me. In crisis ther-

recipe called not only for making your own fresh

The insane but inspiring recipe called for making your own fresh pomegranate juice (oh, squeeze my ass!)

Dan’s supposedly secret

drugs, or the money, or that strumpet’s phone number.) As for stewing over Craig and jerking off to filthy thrilling images of Kyle every day? I wiped my hands of them (in Kyle’s case, literally). Facts: I’m 53 and have a loving partner and a fine life. No reason to ruin it over some perfect-assed boy with the shoulders of Apollo. My constant put-downs of Craig had to stop. I ceased fishwife-screeching at Dan. But how could I prove my shiny new peace with my buddy Gargantua screwing my tight-as-a-2(x)ist-sportbrief dreamboy? Solution: cocktails and dinner. Those wretched margaritas Craig adores were considered and rejected;shanti namaste had its limits. Still, a fruity cocktail for Craig would show off my fabulous new generosity of spirit, which was entirely absent during mein psychoticschen episode. Cosmically, the next day a cooking blog

evening. The drinks were luscious — a little tart, a little sweet and quite refreshing. Craig had three. I had one. Dan was relieved. Craig did a brief impersonation of Dolores Del Rio, which even I found a bit rarified, but Kyle beamed with pride, though Señorita Del Rio’s identity escaped him. We adjourned to a steak joint, where Craig polished off a

stash. (Even cretins start with the boyfriend’s jockstrap drawer for the

enjoyed a marvelous

24-oz porterhouse, and I made no jokes. This boy was back! At which point Kyle piped up: “Um, hey guys? Robbie can’t find a place for next summer. Nobody else will put up with him. Can he stay with us?” Craig responded in the voice of Helen Lawson: “So Satan’s come crawling back to Broadway! Well, Broadway doesn’t take to rudeness and fire-red treasure trails!” But we needed the rent money, so I supposed we’d have to.

Pomegranate Cocktail 2 parts Absolut ½ part Cointreau 3 parts bottled pomegranate juice *“Really” Simple Syrup (optional) Pour Absolut and Cointreau into a pitcher. Add pomegranate juice. Stir. Taste. Add 1/4 tsp. simple syrup if you like. Pour over ice. *Put equal parts sugar and water into a jar, seal it tight and shake until the sugar dissolves.

featured a pomegranate cocktail. The recipe was

Ed Sikov is the author of Dark Victory: The Life

vile — more suitable for pomegranate Jujubes.

of Bette Davis and other books about films and

Craig would love it. The insane but inspiring



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J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 35

Q scopes

your grandparents deal with similar problems? Cooking up old family recipes can be a healing meditation.

You’ll be fine, Libra By Jack Fertig

Mercury is in Capricorn squaring Saturn and Eris, tending to be worried and argumentative. The good news: Venus is in Sagittarius in harmony to all three offering a pleasant negotiation between those challenges. Simply: Good times with friends will help you see more clearly through the problems.


ARIES (March 20–April 19) Pay close attention to colleagues and higher-ups. Not that you’re lacking, but you could learn a few tricks from them of how to be charming and sociable in ways that will prove to your advantage.


TAURUS (April 20–May 20) Don’t be afraid of your own sex appeal. Even in an all-business situation your erotic draw, properly sublimated, will help you win friends and arguments. Some of those friends, however, aren’t to be trusted. Be careful!


GEMINI (May 21–June 20) Talking dirty can be a real turn on and being brutally frank can be refreshing. There’s a time and a place for everything, but with your partner and your good friends, don’t hold back!


LIBRA (September 23–October 22) It’s sometimes hard to know who to be in a relationship even though the answer is obvious Just be your own sweet self. Turn on the charm (as if that takes any effort) and you’ll be fine.


SCORPIO (October 23–Nov. 21) Easy come, easy go? You could control the outflow if you can control your impulses. Keep an eye on your tongue as well; secrets aren’t safe with you right now, but use that openness to examine old doubts, worries and fears.


SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22–Dec. 20) Feeling the need to measure up in the social whirl? Go to the gym and brush up on your Dorothy Parker or Miss Manners if you feel you must. There’s always room for improvement, but really, hon, you’re fine as you are!


CAPRICORN (Dec. 21–January 19) The stress for success is making you a mess. All work and no play… seriously. Take a break. You may think there’s no time for that, but it’s a good investment that will help you to work smarter, not harder.



AQUARIUS (January 20–Feb. 18) Charm and at least seeming openminded will win more agreement than the accuracy and force of your arguments. Worrying over losses is useless. Meditate on what matters and get creative with friends to improve what you can.


PISCES (February 19–March 19) Frustrated with your social life? It’s just one of those passing Piscean phases. You could hone your social skills (Nobody’s perfect!) or just focus on work for a while, be very productive and earn good notice for your efforts.


Jack Fertig, a professional astrologer since 1977, is available for personal and business consultations in person in San Francisco, or online everywhere. He can be reached at 415-864-8302, through his website at, and by e-mail at

CANCER (June 21–July 22) The best way to stay out of trouble is to stick to business, especially your own! Being nice to colleagues will work to your advantage all the better if you don’t expect anything in return, but stay focused on your goals. LEO (July 23–August 22) Take your work seriously, but not too much! Be willing to laugh at your own ideas. Having a sense of humor is more important than winning an argument, and it’s more effective in getting others to accept your ideas.

VIRGO (August 23–September 22) Leaning on traditional, homey values will get you through the crises at hand– as long as they’re your own traditions. How did

puzzle solutions


Cryptogram: Marriage has already been radically transformed in a way that makes gay marriage not only inevitable but also quite logical.

Anagram: Greater Tuna 5 8 6 2 3 1 7 9 4

1 3 2 7 9 4 8 5 6

4 9 7 5 8 6 3 2 1

1 9 4 2 5 8 6 7 3

2 3 6 1 9 7 5 4 8

5 7 8 4 3 6 1 9 2

6 2 4 3 1 8 5 7 9 8 4 2 9 1 3 7 6 5

9 7 3 6 5 2 1 4 8 3 5 7 8 6 4 2 1 9

8 1 5 9 4 7 6 3 2 9 6 1 5 7 2 3 8 4

6 2 9 3 4 1 8 5 7 1 4 3 2 6 9 1 7 3 4 8 5

7 8 5 6 2 9 4 3 1 9 2 6 7 5 8 4 6 9 2 1 3

4 1 3 7 8 5 9 2 6 7 5 8 3 4 1 8 2 5 9 6 7

3 8 2 5 1 4 6 9 7

5 6 9 3 8 7 1 2 4

7 1 4 6 9 2 8 3 5

4 2 1 8 5 7 6 9 3 8 7 5 4 1 2 9 8 3 5 7 6

8 9 6 4 3 1 2 7 5 4 6 1 9 8 3 6 7 5 2 1 4

7 5 3 6 2 9 1 4 8 2 3 9 5 7 6 1 4 2 8 3 9

2 6 9 4 5 7 1 8 3 2 6 7 9 4 3 5 8 1

8 4 7 3 1 9 6 5 2 9 4 5 2 1 8 7 3 6

3 5 1 2 6 8 4 9 7 1 3 8 7 6 5 4 2 9

1 3 4 5 9 6 7 2 8 3 8 4 1 7 6 9 5 2

7 9 5 8 2 4 3 6 1 6 7 9 5 8 2 3 1 4

6 2 8 7 3 1 9 4 5 5 1 2 3 9 4 8 6 7

3 6 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 17 2 | J a nua r y 20, 2011



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Q: The other day my friend, Stan, invited me over for drinks. When I got to his apartment, Barry, who is partnered with my best friend, had just come out of the bedroom wearing a towel. It was really awkward and Stan was shocked that I know Barry and his partner. Barry and my best friend have been together for years and their relationship is supposed to be monogamous. Do I tell my friend, yell at Barry — or just keep my mouth shut?

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Q: My father recently told the family that he’s gay. To be honest, I didn’t know what to say back to him. What would you have suggested? A: In a dream world, you’d be genuinely happy for your father and shout “Mazel tov” or “Congratulations” and give him a big hug. And it would be but one supportive voice among many, with warm wishes from friends, colleagues and other relatives alike. But if that’s not in your heart right now, at the very least I’d suggest you thank your dad for being open and honest with you and tell him that your love for him has not changed. Most LGBT people—yes, even our fathers and mothers—fear rejection more than anything else when they’re coming out. By the way, it’s not too late to take my advice and speak with your dad.


Dad just told us he’s gay


By Steven Petrow



A: Yikes! What’s up with Stan that he invited you over while he still has a paramour on the premises? If you step back from the situation a little, however, you’ll realize that best thing that could happen would be for Barry to let you know that he’s going to fess up to his partner — so that 1) you don’t have to, and 2) you won’t have to have a guilty conscience about saying nothing to your friend. With any luck, Barry will reach out to you with this plan. But, if he doesn’t, call him and let him know “what a good idea” you’d think it would be for him to “do the right thing.” Obviously, the implied threat is that if he doesn’t speak up, you will, but I wouldn’t actually say that. Still, Barry may call your bluff by not saying anything. Then, I’d fold and sit it out on the sidelines because you’re really in a no-win situation. If you turn Barry in, there’s the possibility that your understanding of their monogamous status was wrong in the first place — or that sharing this information wasn’t what your friend would have wanted. Perhaps ignorance may be bliss for him. Finally, I’d be remiss if I didn’t point out that couples often do “kill the messenger” in a charged situation like this. If these two fellows get through this rough patch and back to trusting each other, there’s a real possibility they will both view you as interfering or as a troublemaker. If in the end, if your friend does find out that you knew about his philandering partner and didn’t say anything, tell him the truth: That was Barry’s responsibility.  Q


J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 3 7

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the climacteric Unusual impressions By A.E. Storm

y friend jesse Had thrown a fabulous New Year’s Eve bash this last year, but in all honesty, at my age I should have been in bed before the proverbial ball dropped. Alas, I was not; I was celebrating way into the wee hours of morning. I couldn’t help myself ... I had met someone at the party in whom I’m interested. His name is Billy. He has sexy, chisled features, which complement his military cut. He stands a few inches taller than I do, which is maddenly appealing. And he seems put-together. However, I’m not exactly sure how he feels about me; I’ve been told by many that I’m about as approachable as a wasp’s nest. I suppose there could be two reasons for why interested guys stare at me with wanton puppy eyes but then tinkle the floor where they stand: either I give off a ‘don’t fuck with me or I’ll mess you up’ vibe — an absurdity because I’m a gay man who doesn’t enjoy ruining my clothes — or my natural beauty instantly bewitches them, turning them to stone. Of course, I prefer the second reason, but my gut tells me it’s the first. Billy and I wouldn’t have met that night if Jesse hadn’t had introduced us. We went through introductions, I forgetting his name as soon as he said it, as usual. “How’s your night been?” Billy asked. “Pretty fucking fun,” I replied enthusiastically. He gave me a motherly look of disgust. I thought at any moment he’ll pull a bar of soap from his pocket and wash my mouth out with it. My gut began to hurt. “How about yours?” I urgently asked so as not to lose him. “It’s been okay so far.” Wow, I felt so special at that moment. We exchanged a few more awkward pleasantries that were as memorable as Brtiney Spears on Glee. But that’s really who I am: a man whose first impression is as light and fluid as tar. That’s until I get to know someone, usually after a few drinks; as my friends can attest, alcohol turns me into Julie McCoy, the entertainment director on The Love Boat. Because, while speaking with Billy, I felt more like Gopher, I told him I needed to refreshen my drink; off I went, in a scurry, as embarrassed as if I had been standing in front of him the entire time with my zipper down. As the night wore on, I had asked Jesse twice what was Billy’s name, and I had continued to drink alcohol ... to the point that I believed I was ready to show my dance moves to the entire party. When I was younger I could dance pretty good. I had had no formal training, but I could do club dancing with the best of them. Now, being over 40, my dance fluidity, like my first-impres-

sion fluidity, is sort of like tar. But, I love dancing and it shows, so people tend to get a kick out of watching me. Apparently so does Billy. After a few turns on the living room “dance floor” to a chain of Kylie Minogue diddies, I squeezed my way through sweaty bodies to the kitchen for a glass of water. Billy was waiting, at least I hoped, for me. I walked past him to the fridge and by the time I grabbed a bottled water, he was next to me. “Hi,” he greeted me. “Hey.” I twisted the cap off and took a long swallow. “Tommy,” he said, “I have to say that you’re not really my type, but I’m intrigued by you, especially after watching you dance.” I chuckled unexpectedly. “Um, okay.” “Well, then should I give you my number?” (It was so smooth on my part, it’s a wonder I’m not already hitched.) Billy chuckled, I think unexpectedly. “Sure.” It took me an eternity, or so it felt, to find a pen and paper to write down my number. “Here,” I said, finally handing him the slip of paper. “By the way, tomorrow is my birthday.” He unfolded and glanced at it, as if checking that maybe I had only given him a nine-digit number. He slipped it into the pocket of his jeans. “Thanks,” he said. “Well, I better go, it’s late. Happy New Year ... oh, and happy birthday, too!” What?! No “I’ll call you.” Does he just collect phone numbers and put them in a scrapbook like a person who collects stamps? I was bummed out, so I decided to make myself another cocktail, as if I really needed it. The following day, my birthday — as always — had started out slow and painful. But by the time Jesse, Geoff, George and I pulled up to Jill and Leah’s time-share condo in Deer Valley, the Alka Seltzer in a 5-hour energy drink had kicked in and I was feeling human again, if not a little wired. Inside the condo, there were several friends, a bunch of ‘Over the Hill’ balloons (real original) and a cake in the shape of a penis, but what shocked me was that Billy was there, sitting in a leather chair by a roaring fire, and smiling at me. After a moment he removed himself from the chair and approached me. “Hey there,” he began. “Happy birthday! Sorry I haven’t had a chance to call you in such a long time.” I giggled like a dippy schoolgirl. He gave me an alien look like I was from another planet. I then had hoped at any moment my mothership would come and beam me up. Q


Mike Babbitt

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J a nua r y 20, 2011  |  issue 17 2  |  QSa lt L a k e | 39


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