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March 31–April 13 Volume 2

Issue 7

Ogden Man Guilty in ‘Gay Underworld’ Murder Defense attorney: ‘Scene reminiscent of Dante’s Inferno’

Utah State Univ. Nixes Partner Benefits Plan Legal counsel warns the school not to test Amendment 3

Center Raises Over $50K With Breakfast Most successful fund raiser in the organization’s history

DC. Activist Slain Mayor’s liaison to the gay community found stabbed Kinsey Sicks Coming to Grand Theatre

Laurie Can’t Remember if She Sent in Her Column Gay Agenda Comics

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Liam: Slippery Slope Argument Preys on Fears


News Ogden Man Convicted of Murder in “Gay Underworld” Case by Michael Aaron michael@slmetro.com

After a week-long trial, an Ogden jury deliberated only two hours before convicting Franklin Eugene Woodrick , 49, of murder for his part in the killing of Vincent Donato, 62, and stealing his car in November 2002. The Ogden Standard-Examiner reported the case several times as “centering on the gay underworld, drugs and jealousy,” likely because of defense attorney John Caine’s opening statement that portrayed the case events “reminiscent of Dante’s Inferno. Drugs, homosexual sex and violence all wrapped up in one.” Prosecutor Bill Daines was less sensational, describing Donato as “a gay man, and the reason I tell you that is it plays into the facts of the case.” According to Ogden police, Woodrick and his then-partner Rodney Boyle, 33, went to Donato’s apartment Nov. 6, 2002, for promised methamphetamine. During that evening, Donato pulled a butcher’s knife on Woodrick because he had broken up Donato’s relationship with another man the week before. Boyle, described during testimony as easy to enrage, attacked Donato, kicking him and breaking 13 ribs and his jaw. Woodrick then bound and gagged Donato and joined Boyle in ransacking the apartment for drugs and

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State Worker Caught Stealing Identity to Visit Gay Porn Chat Room A 23-year-old reservationist for the Natural Resources Department has pled guilty to felony credit card fraud after stealing the identity of someone who had just wanted to reserve a campsite or picnic ground. The thief used stolen credit card numbers to make three telephone calls to an interstate gay porn chat room—totaling about $100 in cost. When first questioned by a Kaysville police detective, he admitted that he had access to the card, but claimed he didn’t know it was stolen. He said a friend had the card—but the victim of the fraud had never lost possession of the card. When police noticed the victim had used the card over the phone to reserve a campsite with the Natural Resources Department, police questioned the reservationist again, leading to a guilty plea.—JK

money. They settled for two VCRs and left in Donato’s car, which they ditched at the house of Donato’s former boyfriend to throw off police. Donato died when the gag pushed back his dentures, blocking his airway. A friend found his body the following day. Police arrested Woodrick and Boyle the following day and both confessed to the killing. Boyle pleaded guilty to the crime in October 2003 and is serving a 5 years-to-life sentence in the Utah State Prison under a plea-bargain obtained by his attorney. Boyle testified during the trial that he alone was responsible for the killing, going as far as to say that Woodrick wasn’t even at the scene. However, he testified that he asked Donato why he pulled the knife on Woodrick, to which the prosecutor asked how Donato could do such a thing if Woodrick was not there. Boyle turned to the judge and berated the prosecutor’s actions saying, “He can play with me like that, like a cat with a ball, or a mouse?” The judge responded that it was standard cross-examination. Boyle said the pair lied to police at the time of their arrest about Woodrick’s involvement because they didn’t want to be separated. “We were in love, we had a relationship. So I gave him a story to tell so we’d go to prison together,” he testified. Daines charged in his closing statement that Boyle received some kind of payoff to testify for Woodrick, which Caine refuted. Caine had been trying to work Woodrick a similar plea-bargain to that received by Boyle, but headed to court March 14 without one. The trial had been scheduled and cancelled at least two other times. Woodrick petitioned the court for a change of attorney in September 2004 and Caine sought to suppress Woodrick’s confession in February of this year, saying his statement may not have passed constitutional muster. “It goes to whether his statement was completely voluntary,” Caine testified. “He is a diabetic, he had no food, and he had some problems at the time that he told the officers about.” Those problems were never revealed in court, but Caine represented that the police should have taken certain steps because of them. All pre-trial attempts failed. Woodrick is scheduled for sentencing on April 28. The first-degree murder charge carries a five-years to life penalty and the second-degree auto theft charge carries a one-to-fifteen year prison term.

MICHAEL AARON

LOCAL

Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgender Community Center of Utah at 361 North 300 West, Salt Lake City.

“Calling All Angels” Most Successful Fundraiser in The Center’s History by Jere Keys jere@slmetro.com

The Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgender Community Center of Utah recently held its most successful fundraiser in its seven-year existence. Titled “Calling All Angels,” the breakfast gathering of community members generated a combined $51,367 at last count including over $30,000 in new donations from the community. The success of the fundraiser is great news for the non-profit organization. Just three months ago, the board of directors and staff were unsure The Center would sustain itself and remain open until their annual Utah Pride festival in June. “We are touched by the community’s willingness to support The Center—from the adult groups to the Youth Activity Center and our resource and referral services,” Executive Director Valerie Larabee said. “It confirms for us that we are a vital and appreciated part of the Utah community.” “Calling All Angels” took place on Wednesday, March 16 at the Hotel Monaco with approximately 150 people attending. Organizers told guests about the vision of the organization and the various services The Center provides or supports for the gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and straight-allied community. Speakers at the event included board president Evelyn Garlington, board member Kip Swan, and Salt Lake City Police Capt. Kyle Jones. In her opening remarks Garlington said, “The people of the GLBT Community Center of Utah have a vision of a community living openly in dignity, united in a collective voice—a voice that carries our mission as a people. A voice that clearly says we will not be denied basic human rights because others may consider our rights ‘nonessential.’ We want you to know that we are working to harness the strength, knowledge, courage, experience and passion of our community in order to make this vision a reality.” In his remarks, Swan told the gathering about his personal coming out story, which involved falling prey to older men in public parks, and emphasized that The Center can help keep youth from making the same mistakes. Jones told the gathering about the vital role The Center played when his son came out to his wife and him years ago. “What

could have been a major crisis ended up being a speed bump,” Jones said. “The center is critical to the health and welfare of the community.” Additionally, Larabee informed the audience about new programs at The Center, including two recently-formed task forces and a new event planned for early 2006. The Mental Health Task Force will investigate self-destructive behaviors in the queer community, particularly the high rate of suicide among queer youth, and formulate plans to address the problems of low self-esteem and internalized homophobia. The Community Leadership Round Table Task Force will work to bring together leaders of different queer organizations to define common goals and promote cooperation within the community. The Winter Festival, planned for February 2006, will include community workshops, recreational outings and a formal dance gala. “A few months ago, we were in need of a compelling vision and a vote of financial support from the community,” said Larabee. “With a new mission statement and a revitalized board of directors, we’ve turned the corner and can now focus on the great work we have to do. I’m thrilled!” One major donor and new board member for The Center, Beano Solomon of Park City, agreed to match and double new donations raised at the “Calling All Angels” breakfast—making the event even more successful. Additionally, Solomon has personally donated funding to hire a full-time Director of Youth Programs. Providing a safe space for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, queer or questioning youth aged 24 and younger is among The Center’s most important functions. Solomon is also helping fund The Center’s Queer Prom on April 30, a smoke-free, safe event for youth who may not feel comfortable bringing their partners to official school functions. Perhaps the most exciting news of all, however, is that Solomon has pledged an overall match grant up to $100,000 for all new donations made to The Center this year. Board members hope this challenge grant will encourage more community support than ever before. Jere Keys is a member of the board of directors of The Center.


WORLD AND NATIONAL BRIEFS D.C. Activist Brutally Slain

In a statement released by McCusker’s family, the bishop said he deeply regretted his decision because it resulted in McCusker’s “unjust condemnation” and caused the family “anguish.” Local gays and lesbians have accepted the apology—with reservations. “I think in [Brom’s] mind, John was just a sleazy bar owner and he could do this to make a point,” said friend Mike Portantino, publisher of San Diego’s Gay and Lesbian Times. “What he didn’t realize was what a bright, fun, decent person he was and how many lives he had touched.” While Catholic cannon law allows bishops to deny funerals to members who publicly disobey major church teachings—such as Mafia bosses—the practice remains rare.—JV

Washington, D.C.—Wanda Alston, a prominent queer activist was found dead in her home by her partner, stabbed multiple times. Alston served as Washington D.C. Mayor Tony Williams’ liaison to the gay community. Police have charged a 38-year-old neighbor with her March 16 murder. William Parrot Jr. was arrested a short distance from where Alston's missing car was located the following evening, several blocks away from Alston’s northeast Washington home. Police said Parrot lives two houses away from Alston. An anonymous tip led police to Alston’s car and a witness reported seeing Parrot driving the vehicle. In a news conference, Capt. C.V. Morris of the District of Columbia Police Department said there is no indication that Alston's death was caused by a hate crime or was related to her work on queer issues. Parrot was charged with first-degree murder while armed. Police say that Parrot had been “high” on drugs for several days before he killed Alston and had her credit cards in his possession. Parrot told police that he used some crack, then got a knife and went to Alston's home. He said he attacked Alston and believed he had hurt her. Washington Police Chief Charles Ramsey personally led the investigation. He arrived at the Alston home shortly after the first officers on the scene realized that she was a member of mayor Williams’ cabinet. A standing room-only crowd packed a D.C. Unitarian Universalist church March 21 for her funeral. Friends and city leaders mixed laughter with tears as they remembered the woman known as a tough but generous advocate for gays, lesbians and other minority groups. “We all loved Wanda because she got it done for the cause of civil rights,” D.C. Congressional Del. Eleanor Holmes Norton said at Alston’s funeral. “Growing up, I always wondered how God was ever going to arrange the last judgment. Now I’ve realized Wanda is the leading organizer for the last judgment—it’s going to be on time and on budget,” joked Mayor Williams. Community members mourned Alston and questioned how a life with such purpose could be taken by such a random and senseless act. Throughout her career, Alston had worked with the D.C. Coalition of Black Lesbians, Gay Men & Bisexuals, Human Rights Campaign, National Organization of Women, National Stonewall Democrats and more. She founded a consulting firm named Alston Consulting Services, Inc.—JK

Washington, D.C.—According to the Human Rights Campaign, a new policy requiring parental permission for participation in extracurricular school activities may be detrimental to queer students. The group said that the policy, currently under consideration by the Georgia Department of Education, may keep students from joining gay-straight alliances because asking permission would force them to disclose their orientation to parents. “Schools shouldn’t put up roadblocks to critical support systems for students,” said David Smith, HRC Vice President for Policy and Strategy. “GSAs are a safe place for students to help them in their coming out process—which includes help with coming out to parents.” Sponsored by state superintendent Kathy Cox, the policy mirrors a proposal Senator Ralph Hudgens introduced earlier this year. According to Hudgens, however, he withdrew his legislation when Cox pointed out that a similar policy could be approved faster if it went through the Board of Education. Hudgens said he sponsored the legislation to deter students from getting involved in clubs that affirm homosexuality. “If this was the Spanish Club, or the French Club, or the Engineering Club, or the Future Farmers of America Club, then I probably wouldn't have a lot of concern about it,” an Agape Press story quoted him as saying. “But homosexuality, as far as I’m concerned, is a learned behavior. It’s not genetic—they’ve never been able to prove that there’s a gene that causes this. It’s something that is learned.” The Department of Education will hold a meeting in April to consider the policy.—JV

Catholic Bishop Apologizes for Denying Funeral

Pennsylvania Governor to Reveal Gay History Marker

San Diego, Calif.—The head of the San Diego Catholic diocese apologized to the family of a deceased gay nightclub owner and said he will preside over a mass in the man’s memory “to help rectify the situation” he created when he refused to bury the deceased. On March 13, Bishop Robert Brom cancelled a church service for John McCusker, the owner of Club Montage, because McCusker’s “business activities” conflicted with Catholic moral teaching. Brom made his controversial decision after anti-pornography activist and former club patron James Hartline told him gay porn filmmakers had rented McCusker’s businesses and that porn stars frequented one of his clubs. Brom also forbade the diocese’s other 98 churches from holding services. An Episcopal funeral service was held for McCusker at the Cathedral of St. Paul.

Philadelphia—The Pennsylvanian Historical and Museum Commission voted unanimously March 23 to designate the area around Independence Hall as the site of the nation’s first organized, annual gay and lesbian civil rights picket, held July 4, 1965. They will honor the area with an historical marker. With help from Frank Kameny and Barbara Gittings, gay rights leaders who helped organize the historic demonstration, Philidelphia-based gay rights group Equality Forum prepared the application for the marker earlier this year. “Pennsylvania is proud to be both the birthplace of our nation and the birthplace of so many historic events that have advanced civil rights in America,” PHMC’s Chairman Wayne Spilove said. Governor Ed Rendell will unveil the marker at Independence Hall on May 1.—JV

HRC, Senators Battle Over Gay Student Policy

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News LOCAL

Center to Hold Town Meeting April 10 The Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Community Center of Utah will hold its regular bi-annual town meeting on Sunday, April 10, beginning at 3:00 p.m., at the Head Start administrative offices, 1307 S. 900 West, in Salt Lake City. The town meeting, the third since The Center began holding town meetings twice a year last year, will be an opportunity for a community update on the work and initiatives of The Center as well as an opportunity for staff and board members to facilitate discussions on the pressing needs of the community. “These town meetings serve as an important forum for community dialogue,” said Valerie Larabee, Executive Director of The Center. “To achieve The Center’s mission—to be a catalyst for personal growth, acceptance and equality for GLBT people in Utah—we must remain grounded in the fundamental focus of our origin: community. By staying community-based and community focused, The Center allows for real life, up-close confrontations with a spectrum of issues affecting GLBT individuals ranging from individual and group support to facilitating a community-wide vision for equality.” In addition to The Center update, including The Center’s Utah Pride plans,

part of the afternoon will be devoted to small-group breakout sessions to discuss issues of concern to the participants. “Each town meeting, we make sure to invite members of the community whose interests and activities are focused in a variety of categories including political, social, fitness/sports/recreation, physical and mental health, and spiritual concerns,” said Robert Austin, Board Vice President and event facilitator. “We spend some time breaking into smaller groups to hear the concerns that may be unique to these affinity groups. Of course, all members and allies of the community are welcome. We are committed to making sure all members of the community have a ‘place at the table’ and a stake in the work of The Center.” The event is free and open to the public, but The Center will accept donations to offset costs and to continue the community-wide push to meet the recently announced Beano Solomon challenge grant of $100,000 for new donations to The Center. RSVPs will allow the Center to prepare refreshments and break-out sessions. Please RSVP to Jennifer Nuttall, Coordinator of Adult Programs at The Center, by e-mail at Jennifer@glbtccu.org, or by phoning 801-539-8800 ext. 13.

Sen. McCoy To Make Acting Debut at Tapestry Against Polygamy Fundraiser By Kim Burgess

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kim@slmetro.com

Scott McCoy, Utah’s first openly gay senator, will lend his acting skills to Tapestry Against Polygamy’s upcoming fundraiser by reading the part of a reporter in Brother-Husbands, a one-act play that will premiere at the event. Brother-Husbands depicts life in Bathtub Creek, a fictional polygamist enclave where women have multiple husbands. “We are so happy to have Scott involved,” says Susan Vogel, of Salt Lake City CodePink, one of the event’s sponsors. “His participation will help us get out the message that support of gay rights doesn’t have to mean support of polygamy.” Vicky Prunty, co-founder of Tapestry, goes on to say, “Polygamy has been riding on the coattails of gay rights for a long time, which is ironic considering that polygamists think homosexuality is a sin. We want to make it clear that unlike gay rights, polygamy usually doesn’t deal with consenting adults. Instead, these are teen girls who have been taught from birth that they should serve men. They are taken from school in their teens, so they have no education or means of supporting themselves outside the community; and everyone they know is pressur-

ing them to enter a polygamous marriage. In contrast, gay people enter relationships freely and those relationships are partnerships between equals.” To emphasize this point, the event’s organizers are distributing lavender-colored promotional fliers that read, “Polygamy is no laughing matter, nor is it a reason to deny gay rights.” Despite the serious subject matter, the event will take a lighthearted approach. “We want to have a good time, but also raise awareness about the abuses of polygamy,” says Andrea Moore-Emmett of Utah NOW, another event sponsor. Other celebrity readers in Brother-Husbands include bookstore owner Ken Sanders as God and Salt Lake Tribune political cartoonist Pat Bagley as the Head Husband, Burke. Popular local folk band the SisterWives will perform after the play, and a “polygamist buffet” will feature a casserole competition and Polygamy Porter beer. Tickets are $40 for general admission; $15 for students, low-income individuals, and seniors. The event, which is for ages 21 and older, takes place on April 2nd at 6:30 p.m. at Cactus and Tropicals, 2735 S. 2000 East in Salt Lake City.

“Operation Visibility” at the U. by Jere Keys jere@slmetro.com

The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender Resource Center at the University of Utah launched Operation Visibility, a week-long campaign designed to raise awareness and to spark discussion about gay issues and the existence of the LGBT Resource Center on campus at the University of Utah. Advertisements in the Daily Utah Chronicle, hundreds of flyers and lawn signs posted around campus depicting simple written statements: “Gay is real,” “lesbians are real,” “bisexuals do exist,” and “transgender is real” with only a phone number and room location of the Resource Center. The bold, simple statements and non-identifying room and phone numbers sparked inquiry. “The whole point is to get students talking about LGBT people on campus and about the LGBT Resource Center,” said Charles Milne, Coordinator at the LGBT Resource Center. “We can tell that’s what has been happening.” Milne reported an increase in calls and visits to the Center during the week, but not all the dialogue has been positive. “Either a group or a single individual put up posters that said ‘White Heterosexual

Males Exist,’” Milne explained, “and both those posters and ours got written on with messages like ‘Just because it exists doesn’t make it right.’” Milne said the dean of students has received complaint phone calls asking the fliers to be taken down. When the dean refused, one caller threatened to “get him fired” by writing to state officials. Another caller insisted that the University’s code of honor prevents homosexuals from being on campus. “We don’t even have a code of honor,” Milne replies. “That’s BYU.” The LGBT Resource Center also hosted a visibility rally March 28. Originally scheduled for March 24, the rally was meant to foster a dialogue around campus that will help make the community aware of the Center and its programs, and discuss the ads that have been placed on campus. The date of the rally changed because of the weather. In addition, the many questions the advertisements and flyers were designed to stir up were discussed at a forum in the Olpin Union Building Saltair Room March 28. The forum was moderated by Dr. Barbara Snyder, University of Utah, Vice President for Student Affairs.

Royal Court Hosts Cancer Fund Raiser On March 18, Princess Royales of the Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire Krystina Shaylee, Kyra Prespentte and Kim Russo, hosted “Ain’t Takin’ No Shit.” The show, held at the Paper Moon, raised much needed funds for the Court’s cancer fund and the general fund. An impressive crowd attended and supported the cause, and many performers stepped up to the stage to deliver outstanding and striking performances. Kyra Prespentte (Cary Hasler) said that she was proud to be part of the show because it was a “part of rebuilding the community and erasing the negatives.” All three hosts of the show felt strongly that it should have the sub heading, “Renewal in the Community.” The hosts also agree that “Renewal in the Community” is about erasing past hurts and misunderstandings and coming together as a

holistic group, a group that is committed to forgiveness, tolerance and understanding. In other events for March, Empress 29, Syren Vaughn, hosted a month’s worth of activities to benefit the Royal Court’s cancer fund. The events raised over $4000 for the fund and the Court will work throughout the year in dispersing the money. Both the 29th Reign and Empress Vaughn have worked to raise awareness about cancer and its many research efforts. They also aim to educate those attending the shows about the devastating effects that cancer has brought to so many lives. The Royal Court is a non-profit organization that strives to outreach to individuals, families and organizations in the community that are in need of assistance. The next Royal Court “Renewal in the Community” show will be presented at the Paper Moon on April 29 at 9:00 p.m.—KR


New Utah Internet Law Is a Potential Threat to Gay Websites by Joel Shoemaker joel@slmetro.com

A law signed by Gov. Jon Huntsman March 21 is intended to protect children from adult material, but could threaten gay websites and faces almost certain legal challenge. The law requires the Utah Attorney General’s office to compile a list of “adult” websites that are not access-restricted and that may be “harmful to minors.” Then, local internet service providers will be required to block access through a rating system and provide free software to customers who wish to have the sites blocked. ISPs that don’t comply could be charged with a third-degree felony. ISPs and free speech groups have come out against the law for many reasons, in part because of violations on free speech and the law’s vagueness. The bill gives no indication of what constitutes an “adult” site. Gay news website 365gay.com points out that sexual health and information websites, along with GLBT news sites, could be considered “harmful to minors” by some, and consequently blocked by

ISP filters. In an editorial in Provo’s Daily Herald opposing the law, ACLU of Utah’s Andrew McCollough wrote: “Who would make a decision as to whether a website is ‘harmful to minors?’” McCollough also points out that the law doesn’t establish an appeal process for websites who feel they have been wrongly targeted. XMission, EarthLink, and other ISPs have spoken out against the bill, saying there are already other alternatives on the market for parents who want to protect their children from unwanted material. Pennsylvania overturned a similar law last year. In a letter to Huntsman urging him to veto the bill, ACLU of Utah said this law would be unlikely to withstand legal challenge, too. They say it violates free speech rights of ISPs and customers who don’t want websites they wish to access restricted. Both of Utah’s openly gay legislators (Rep. Jackie Biskupski and Sen. Scott McCoy) voted in favor of the bill during this last legislative session; it passed with zero “no” votes in either the House or the Senate. The law took effect upon Huntsman’s signing.

USU Domestic Partner Benefits Plan Dealt a Blow norm in western United States educational institutions. “Perhaps a less risky alternative would be to allow another institution to ‘fight the battle first’ and see how it fares politically and financially,” wrote Nelson in a document to the Faculty Senate Executive Committee. Advocates of the proposal feel that since they are often told that employee benefits make up for relatively small salaries, denying gay and lesbian faculty and staff access to all the benefits amounts to employment discrimination. Debate continues on the subject, and if the Faculty Senate and administration approves the proposal, the USU Board of Trustees must still approve it as well. Nelson believes the Board of Trustees is likely to kill the proposal, and questions why the faculty and administration would expose the university to negative attention when the likelihood of success is very low. “As Utah State University seeks to maintain and improve its reputation as a research extensive university,” wrote the faculty who initially proposed the idea, “we must be mindful of the negative impact that failure to provide equal benefits to all employees has had, and will continue to have, on the viability of the institution.” On Monday, March 28, the Faculty Senate met and rejected the proposal, saying that USU doesn’t want to be a “test case” for domestic partner benefits, but supporters of the proposal have vowed that the fight is not over.—JK

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Utah State University officials are looking into a proposal that would provide equal benefits to faculty and staff in same-gender relationships. The proposal, which has been gaining momentum since first introduced to the Faculty Senate on Jan. 27, would ask the University to give same-gender partners the same treatment they give to spouses of heterosexual, married faculty and staff. Among these privileges, the University would pay for the partners’ health insurance upon request and after proving the partners are in a committed, long-term relationship. “In looking back, I counted 10 [faculty or staff] who have left the university because of unsupportive situations in their departments, lack of spousal accommodation, and the perceived ‘silencing’ of gay/lesbian issues on campus,” wrote Associate Dean Elizabeth York in the original proposal submitted to the Senate. An ad hoc Domestic Partner Benefits Committee has been working hard to gather facts, statistics, cost projections and legal arguments about the proposal. At least one faculty member, Irvin T. Nelson, stands opposed to the proposal. Nelson argues that the proposal could have political fallout with the legislature, students and donors of the university. He also brings up Amendment 3 and argues that refusing to recognize relationships that are not sanctioned by the state (unmarried partners) is not the same as discrimination in employment policies. Nelson argues that offering this type of same-gender partner benefits is not the


Publisher Michael Aaron Editor Jere Keys Arts Editor Eric J. Tierney

Opinion

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Utah’s Porn Law Flawed Where do we begin when speaking of House Bill 260, “Amendments Related to Pornographic and Harmful Materials,” which Governor Huntsman signed into law last week? It’s a bad law on so many grounds that our heads practically spin just trying to comprehend it. The new law requires Internet Service Providers to provide a way for parents to block their family from accessing pornography. Sounds fairly simple, right? Wrong. Despite what you’ve probably read in the papers and heard from our lawmakers, this law isn’t just about pornography. The law requires ISPs to provide parental blocks for “material harmful to minors.” Yet, we couldn’t find an exact definition of what that means. Is our website, which certainly promotes a positive image of the queer community, harmful to minors? There are many parents who would think so. What about the GLBT Community Center? What about websites like www.plannedparenthood.org, which provide information about contraceptives, pregnancy, sexual health and STDs? Do we even need to point out that access to this kind of information might save lives, prevent pregnancy, and do more good than the abstinence-only zeitgeist? If you want to talk about harmful to minors, though, what about websites for white supremacists? What about Fred Phelps’ godhatesfags. com? It is our opinion that this kind of material is far more harmful to minors than the occasional artistic nude shot of the human body. For that matter, we’d rather have children looking at artist Sharon Seligman’s breathtaking exhibit on breast cancer (www.sharonseligman.com) than looking at the unrealistic body images presented in just about any glossy fashion magazine out there. Once again, in typical Utah zealotry to appear more conservative than the next guy, our law-

makers have passed a law with such potential for abuse that the words “slippery slope” just slide off the tongue. We whole-heartedly agree with the ACLU and others who believe this law will not stand up in courts against a constitutional challenge on the basis of free speech rights. In the meantime, the Attorney General’s office is saddled with the task of creating an Adult Content Registry—which will find and track websites that offer unrestricted adult content. We find this both unnecessary and silly. There are entire companies that exist for this purpose (Net Nanny, Content Purity, Cyber Patrol, etc.) that have already been creating these kinds of databases. Still, if the Attorney General needs to hire people whose job it is to surf the web looking for free and unrestricted porn, there are several Metro staffers who already have some experience in that area and will be happy to turn their hobby into a career. There are dozens of methods out there for parents who wish to block their children from accessing adult content. This law is recreating the wheel. Why does the state feel it can do a better job at monitoring the internet for pornography than the consumer-driven market? Couldn’t the money spent on creating and maintaining this registry be better spent on something important, like education? What about the court costs the state will now incur defending this law against well-financed ISPs (like America Online)? It’s a “message bill” and the message is an ugly one: that Utah’s brand of conservatism is more important than the First Amendment. It is the opinion of Salt Lake Metro that the legislature and Governor Huntsman have passed a bad law. It’s poorly written, a bad idea, and will certainly bleed money away from much more important areas of the state’s budget.

From the Editor Wanna Play With My Balls? by Jere Keys jere@slmetro.com

After writing “Spring has Sprung” in my last editorial, I’ve watched in amusement as the temperature dropped, rain turned into snow, and the sky became more overcast than it’s been in weeks. Still, things are beginning to heat up ever-so-slowly, and with the return of (hopefully) better spring weather, we have many sporting events starting up in queer Utah. When I was in sixth grade, my mother coached my little league basketball team. Don’t laugh—even seven months pregnant she could win a match against my entire team. Since our elementary school mascot was the panther, we (except my mother) thought it would be a good idea to have pink uniforms (pink panthers, get it?). I scored two points the entire season. That pretty much ended my interest in organized sports. Well, that’s not quite true. In high school, I used to delay my walk home just long enough to pass by the soccer fields while the varsity team was practicing. For some reason, they didn’t feel it was appropriate to wear shirts during August in Las Vegas. I know I’m not the only gay man to find the idea of organized sports less than exciting. I don’t want to stereotype or anything, but when we did our reader’s survey several months ago, sports routinely rated at the bottom of the lists of people’s interests. My question, then, is why do so many of you list all the sports you play in your gay.com profile? All kidding aside, there is a strong and growing queer athletics community in Utah. From bowling to yoga, it’s hard to claim that none of these activities sounds the least bit interesting. What I most admire about the queer athletic groups, though, is that most of them seem to really get what it’s all about. The groups exist to foster health, teamwork, social opportunities, and fun. In our look at some of the sports groups for this issue, none of them said they turned away players who were beginners or simply lessthan-good. It’s less about competition and more about personal achievement. The straight sports community could learn a lesson there. There are people (there always are) who would scoff at the idea that we ought to have sporting organizations especially for queer people. As someone who grew up feeling that because of my “difference” I’d never fit in if I tried out for the wrestling team, I believe that open groups that allow us to socialize and make friends while doing activities that are healthy for our minds and bodies could be the most positive experience a queer person can have. As someone who’s been told more than once that I threw “like a girl” and was picked last for every team, only a comfortable and accepting group would help me get up the courage to try in the first place. Despite the diversity of our local athletic options, there are still holes to be filled. So what’s your passion? Boxing? Cheerleading? Gymnastics? (I dated a gymnast once—that was a workout!) Chances are you aren’t the only queer person interested in competitive miniature golf, or whatever, so why not get a group organized? Still not convinced that queer sports are cool? Well, think of the spectator aspect of it all. Salt Lake Metro is putting together a softball team this year, and while I’m not planning to play, I think it will be great fun to hang out on the sidelines and cheer the team on. I hope you all have a healthy and active spring season!


Letters HRC Should Work for More Than Just the Rich Editor, I’m glad that Salt Lake Metro made its readers aware of Human Rights Campaign’s new president, Joe Solmonese, who spent the last 12 years as CEO of EMILY’s List. Human Rights Campaign is a fine organization with a worthy mission to advance human rights and equality for everyone, including GLBT people. Metro readers should be aware that despite EMILY’s List’s stated purpose of helping progressive political candidates, that organization, under Joe Solmonese’s direction, also pushed for lessthan-progressive issues that are good for big business and bad for human rights. While I was an intern in the U.S. House of Representatives for Rep. Karen Shepherd (D-Utah) in 1994, EMILY’s List threatened to cut off campaign funding for Representative Shepherd if she did not vote in favor of NAFTA (the North American Free Trade Agreement). NAFTA has been great for business and bad for human rights, especially for the many people devastated by loss of employment in the U.S., and Mexicans forced to risk their lives to immigrate in hopes of finding work. It’s a free trade agreement for big business but not for workers.

The Slippery Slope by William Todd Park liam@slmetro.com

Rachel White Salt Lake City, Utah

Don’t Disrespect Those You Should Thank Editor: Where does one begin to respond to Ted Fisler’s letter bemoaning the lack of selfrespect he sees in our community? I hate to break it to him, but here in Utah he could lose his job for having written that letter. Thankfully, those of us with no self-respect will be there to fight for him if that happens. Perhaps a history lesson is in order. It was the drag queens that fought back in 1969 so that Mr. Fisler has the option to enter a gay bar or have a few friends over for dinner without being afraid that he might be arrested. He says that he should be able to marry his boyfriend. I agree, but how does he expect that to happen? I suspect he’ll wait for the freaks that cause him such consternation to finish the fight so he can enjoy the equal rights he thinks will otherwise magically appear on his doorstep like manna from heaven. He then asks why we need a gay newspaper (let alone two). As a daily reader of the Salt Lake Tribune I haven’t, in 15 years USA Today/Gallup poll still has the country pretty much evenly divided on the topic. The economic benefits associated with allowing same-sex couples to marry are far reaching. A study published by the UCLA School of Law projects an increase of $22.3 to $25.2 million each year to the California budget alone if gay marriage were legalized. On a federal level, legalizing same-sex unions would lead to an annual increase in federal government income taxes of between $0.3 billion and $1.3 billion. Then there are the actual weddings themselves. In a scenario based on 2000 U.S. Census figures, Christine Halverson of the University of Wisconsin-La Crosse modestly estimates gay and lesbian couples wanting to legally tie the knot would spend $4.75 billion in wedding costs—in just the first year. And don’t forget the gifts and the honeymoon. All-around, weddings are good for business. Despite the warnings of religious leaders, same-sex unions will actually strengthen and stabilize family systems. Gary Gates of the Urban Institute cites Census statistics that more than 40% of same-sex partner couples have lived in the same home for more than five years, and one in four of those couples raise children. Two-thirds of these children live in the 43 states where ‘second parent’ adoption isn’t guaranteed. Because legal parent status cannot be granted to the surviving partner, Social Security survivor benefits can be denied to the child, not to mention that the second parent cannot authorize emergency medical treatment. Crafting a legal framework for same-sex relationships creates a much more stable future for the children should one partner meet an untimely demise. Moreover, there is the priceless peace of mind that comes from being part of a family structure that can no longer be marginalized.

in Utah, seen a fraction of the gay news I’ve had access to in the bi-weekly Salt Lake Metro that has been in publication for less than a year. Perhaps Mr. Fisler subscribes to the Deseret News and gets adequate and unbiased coverage there. In one week this month a few tacky drag queens raised over $5,000 to benefit cancer charities. Between May and December a few tacky drag queens raised over $13,000 so that people with AIDS might have some sort of Christmas. Over the last 30 years the various organizations made up of the tacky drag queens, leathermen, circus clowns and limp-wristed sissies he so easily dismisses have raised a million dollars or more for local charities. Finally, while Mr. Fisler certainly has the right to espouse any opinion he wishes, I would think that he would have more respect for these very hard-working members of our community. They probably saved his life. It is thanks to the almost singular effort of these honorable, visible and outspoken individuals and organizations that there is any AIDS education or semblance of equal rights in Utah today. By all means, stay home on June 12th, 2005. Lock the doors, draw the curtains and, if necessary, hide in a darkened closet so you won’t be embarrassed by the parade. But do not disrespect the people you should be thanking for the quality of life you are able to enjoy today.

William H. Munk Salt Lake City, UT Rather than the continued vilifying of relationships that don’t fit a so-called traditional model and painting an apocalyptic picture of the consequences of granting equal rights to gays and lesbians, perhaps it’s time to apply that same slippery slope argument to the conservative misdeeds that are being glossed over. For example, under President Clinton we enjoyed a $236 billion budget surplus in 2000. The very next year, Mr. Bush reversed the policies that put us in the black. The 2004 budget is short by a record $415 billion, a figure masked by his taking $150 billion from Social Security, bringing the actual deficit to a staggering $565 billion. That changes our ten-year forecast from a $5.6 trillion surplus to a $4.7 trillion deficit! To cover for the crisis he created in Social Security, Bush is now trying to re-engineer the system through private investment. The Enron, Arthur Andersen, and WorldCom debacles are apparently too far distant in Mr. Bush’s memory. Saddling states with unfunded mandates for noble-sounding but shortsighted educational initiatives, engaging in flippant foreign policy, and threatening pristine wilderness in the interest of big business oil prospecting merely scratches the surface of the many colossal failures of this White House leadership. In contrast, same-sex partners will be discriminated against for just wanting to love each other while the ‘man of God’ we put into the oval office continues to inflict his ruinous and arrogant incompetence on the world. Talk about a slippery slope. The slippery slope to legally recognized gay marriage will herald economic and social growth, not to mention the fact that no one is injured in that scenario. In contrast, the slippery slope into the pit of neo-con-

Ah Ruby! Now I know why we’ve included the Bonanza theme song in our medley of “TV Theme Songs You Never Knew Had Lyrics” for our upcoming concert “Lights, Camera, Action!” Hoss and the gang live on in every little baby boom gay boy’s fantasy! Personally, I had the hots for Adam (until he got bounced!)—tall, dark and in control—you know, walk quietly but carry a big “stick.” Feel free to hum or sing along, Darlin... and let your Hoss fetish shine through! We got a right to pick a little fight, Bonanza! If any one fights any one of us, he’s got a fight with me We’re not a one to saddle up and run, Bonanza! Any one of us who starts a little fuss, knows he can count on me! One for four, four for one This we guarantee! We got a right to pick a little fight, Bonanza! If any one fights any one of us, he’s got a fight with me! Kudos!

Matt La Victoire Baritone and Board Member Orlando Gay Chorus Salt Lake Metro welcomes letters from our readers at letters@slmetro.com. or fax us at 801-323-9986.

servatism will continue to bring about higher debt, more social divisiveness, and more bloodshed on the battlefield.

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The Utah conservative Mafia insists that legislative maneuvers extending recognition to any non-traditional relationship will take American society down the slippery slope of moral decay to unspeakably horrible consequences. In discussing gay marriage, Focus on the Family founder James Dobson epitomized the slippery slope fear tactic, saying, “You could have polygamy ... ” but since we already have a long-standing history of that in this state, we need something more dramatic that will really frighten the flocks of decent, well-meaning people into the voting booths. In the same breath, Dobson carried his non-sequitur logic to the demagogic nth degree: “You could have incest. You could have marriage between a father and a daughter. You could have two widows, or two sisters or two brothers ... . Three women or three men, or five and two or five and five.” Before Dobson conjured up these images for us, the only place these things happened was in the tabloids or porn flicks. It’s end-of-the-world stuff we’re looking at here. Dogs and cats living together— mass hysteria! These panic-laden remarks, and so many others like them, would normally be the target of late night television monologues, but the sad truth is that people are buying this slippery slope argument. Pushing the moral rhetoric aside, there has been a lot of debate on the economic and social impact same-sex unions would have. Although things are improving, a

People who care about Human Rights Campaign should watch Mr. Solmonese carefully and demand that he in fact works for a progressive agenda for all LGBT people, not just rich ones.


Ruby Ridge Living Anyway muffins, the visual image that sticks with me to this day was the number of pedigreed Catholic heads whipby Ruby Ridge ruby@slmetro.com lashing on swivels trying to ogle the young chicken and party boys prancing Yes it’s Easter, their way down to Point State Park. And darlings! God’s let me assure you: it was not covert or passive-aggressubtle—it was downright blatant. A few sive way of saying, years later, when the whole pedophile “Ruby, take down priest cover-up scandal hit, I was sooooo the dang Christnot surprised! mas tree!” Which Now, I, of all people, am nowhere near I am proud to say perfect (or even near a Walgreen’s now I finally did last that I think about it), but, then again, I weekend. As I was bubble-wrapping my don’t wrap myself up in the trappings of Sears nativity, I found my mind drifting piety or profess to be speaking on God’s off and wondering, “What the hell is up behalf. The hypocritical thing that really with the Catholics lately?” In San Diego, bugs me when the Vatican launches into a Catholic Bishop wouldn’t allow final aggressive damage control is how they rites for a gay club owner who died, or label ALL gay allow his funeral priests as if they to be held in one were pedophiles. of their churches. Faced with posAcross the pond in Scotland, a CathoAnd let’s face it muffins, sible financial ruin in civil court lic Bishop wants the Catholic Church and a crisis of openly gay and faith from their lesbian teachers was built on the backs congregants, the to be banned from and knees of its gay Catholic adminteaching. Meanistration ignored while, the Vatican priests. their dysfuncis harassing and tional culture of libeling gay priests, gay denial and the aggressively camreal problems it paigning to stop creates. They instead sacrificed their gay gay marriage spreading across Europe and America, and blacklisting politicians priests for short-term political gain. And let’s face it, muffins, the Catholic Church who don’t toe their religious hard line on was built on the backs and knees of its social issues. Cherubs, I’m thinking John gay priests. Paul and the posse needs some fiber! And don’t even get me started on all of As the Catholic hierarchy is ratcheting the gay Jesuits out there in Catholic acaup the indignant anti-gay rhetoric, I’m demia. I mean, seriously, have you ever compelled to share this really tacky but been to a Loyola University campus? I’m abysmally true story with you all. Years ago, I was in Pittsburg for some meetings pretty sure Loyola is a Latin derivative for “gay bar with a library.” Well, enough and, lo and behold, who was occupying venting from me kittens, I need to get up the same downtown hotel as moi but a on my roof and take down my illumimeeting of the US Conference of Cathonated Snoopy Santa before Yom Kippur. lic Bishops! And here’s the funniest part: Ciao! It was also gay pride week. So while the Bishops and their entourage were winRuby Ridge is one of the more opinionated ing and dining in embarrassing luxury members of the Utah Cyber Sluts, a Camp inside the hotel, there were thousands of Drag group of performers who raise funds everyday gay folk lounging on the lawn and support local charities. Her opinions are her own and fluctuate wildly due to outside listening to musical performirritability and bloating. She is currently ers, political speeches, and lesbian developing an Atkins Approved communion comedians. It was so Fellini-meets-Jerry Springer that you just have to a) laugh, b) wafer, and a faith based line of beef jerky products. cringe, c) cry, or d) all of the above.

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Mass Hysteria


AberRant Memo Relapse by Laurie Mecham laurie@slmetro.com

You can count on me. I will never, ever reveal the dark secret that you shared with me that time, late at night when we had been driving for hours. I will not share the drunken confession I overheard in the ladies’ room after the premiere. I will never disclose what you admitted to me in the email when you hit “send” too soon. This is not because I am saintly or reserved or even because I possess any self-control. It is because I will not remember. I was inviting people to a fundraiser a few years back. I was stretching to think who should be included. At a party I ran into this guy I knew casually and I kept thinking that I should invite him, but for some reason I didn’t mention it. As I drove home later, I gradually pieced together the realization that one of the people putting on the event, a man I had only known for a short time, had been in a relationship that has recently ended with the party guy. It had ended with a restraining order, actually. I think you will agree that it turned out to be a good thing that I had not brought them together for the fundraiser. It may have raised all manner of non-fund things. But was I the kind of person who exploited their drama? Did I target their woundedness, vulture-like, smelling the blood? Not I! For I had seen something shiny, or a song came on the radio, or I had to remember three items to purchase at the grocery store (creamer, bread, Q tips) and so the whole scenario faded into the junkyard of my brain, another bit of uncatalogued, arbitrary data settling into the dusty dark corners of forgotten minutiae. Creamer, bread, Q tips. Creamer, bread, Q tips. It is well known in my family that if you want something expedited through the Mecham grapevine, you should tell sister Pat. And if you want something kept private, you should only talk to your therapist. The family is gradually learning, however, that I would make a fantastic priest, bishop, or other confessional figure, because I forget the details, the dirt, and even the names involved. Tell me about your abortion, your affair, that guy you killed in the drug deal gone awry. Your secret is safe with me. Oh, I may tell it unwittingly at some point, perhaps in this very column, but I will assume that I read it on the cover of The Globe while standing in the checkout line. This goes for anything: shoplifting,

alcoholism, hair appointment Thursday, hair appointment Thursday. It is possible that a couple of my friends have felt hurt because I forgot an important event in their lives. I am sorry. I had a deadline at work, and there was a story on NPR. What is left of my mind tends to wander. Oh my God, Robert Blake is so freaking guilty, how can anyone not see that? So anyway, sorry about that thing you just said, or was it me? My children—by the way, they are 26 and 23, and apparently I had not remembered to convey that before. If I made them sound younger, it is probably just because I dote on them, in a normal, borderline-obsessive but healthy manner. After all, if I was an overbearing mother in any way my son would be gay, wouldn’t he? And he is not. Not that there is anything wrong with that. Some of my best friends are gay. In fact, I’m queer myself! Anyway, my kids know that I will not remember the name of the person they are dating until they’ve rented an apartment together. That’s just Mom, mind like a steel strainer. I know that they have done lovely things for me on holidays, but I forget the gifts, those I have received as well as those I have given. I remember the important things, however; like the time when Emily was three and she mooned the Relief Society, and the fact that when the kids were little they both got teddy-bear hamsters with pink eyes. Emily named hers Cuddles and Jack, a.k.a. Super (pronounced “Thuper”) Jack, appropriately named his mighty teddy bear hamster Red Thunder. Ha—I remember! They tease me though. Sometimes they will make oblique references to some fictional guy that they refer to as “Dad.” I’m not falling for it. Some things you never forget. I mean, you can forget apathy, you can forget acrimony, but if I had ever received alimony, I think I would remember. Back to confessions and disclosure: I was going to keep this close to the vest, but word travels fast in the gay community, and people often get the wrong information. I just wanted to address some rumors that have been circulating about our publisher, Michael Aaron. Before I do that though, I do want to take a moment to thank those faithful readers who tell me they enjoy the column. I especially want to give props to those who voted in the Metro poll. Poll, pole, pole your boat, gently down the stream. Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock . . . . So, back to what I was saying . . . . Um, give me a hint. Thunder, abortion, creamer—oh yes, I need to remember to get Q tips. Q tips for Thursday.

Your secret is safe with me. Oh, I may tell it unwittingly at some point, perhaps in this very column, but I will assume that I read it on the cover of ‘The Globe’ while standing in the checkout line.

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Laurie Mecham wishes that she could write her own column. Oh, wait—never mind!


Lambda Lore The Pam Parson Scandal of 1984 by Ben Williams ben@slmetro.com

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In February 1982, Sports Illustrated published an article entitled “Stormy Weather at South Carolina” in which the women’s basketball coach at the University of South Carolina was accused of having a lesbian relationship with one of her players. This article rocked the national women sports realm as well as the Salt Lake lesbian community, dividing a fragile populace into opposing camps for years. Pam Parsons was the basketball coach of the South Carolina Lady Gamecocks. Her 1980 team finished third in the nation, and the following year they were ranked No. 2, ending the season undefeated. Suddenly “it all came crashing down after Parsons was caught in an affair with one of her players.” Parson first met 17-year-old Tina Buck at an Atlanta bar, but their relationship, according to critics, “made the stereotypes seem true—that untrustworthy lesbians pervade women’s basketball and entice impressionable young people.” In November 1980, a private detective revealed that the 30-point-high-schoolaverage Buck spent a night at Parsons’ house—violating recruiting rules because

Buck was, technically, a visiting high school recruit. Later that December, a player told her mother she’d seen Parsons and Buck embrace and kiss. The relationship between the women seemed so obvious that in 1982 Sports Illustrated outed Parsons as a lesbian, after which she was fired as a basketball coach. Parsons then accused Time, Inc., which owned Sports Illustrated, of libel and sued the company for $75 million. Two years later, the United States Federal District Court in South Carolina saw the case with Time defending the story as true and, therefore, not libelous. During the course of the trial, Parsons and Buck denied, under oath, that they had been lovers and swore that they had not had sex with each other. In May 1984, during Utah’s KUTV Channel 2 sports segment of the 10 p.m. news, Babette (better known as Babs) De Lay watched incredibly as Pam Parson and Tina Buck stated under oath in a Federal Court that they were not lesbians and denied any type of relationship. This infuriated De Lay, who had a secret that she could not wait to tell. By 1984, she had been involved in community building for nearly a decade and had built herself a reliable reputation as editor of fledgling gay and lesbian newspapers, as well as host of a weekly women’s music program on KRCL-FM. However, more importantly for this story, she also worked at the popular lesbian bar Puss N Boots as a bartender. There she had witnessed Parsons and Buck, “dancing in-

Brought to you through the Salt Lake Community College Multicultural & Diversity Programming Committee with support from: Fine Arts and Lectures, the Office of the President, the Office of the Vice President of Academic Services, the Office of the Vice President of Student Services, the Office of the Vice President of Business Services, Student Life and Leadership and Coloring Outside the Lines.

timately and openly proclaiming that they were lovers.” During much of the 1980s, law required bar patrons to sign a membership registry before entering and they also had to show drivers licenses. The Puss N Boots registry contained the signatures of Parson and Bucks, who had visited Salt Lake City the year before. Babs De Lay knew this. After KUTV’s broadcast, Time, Inc. received several phone calls from Salt Lake, including Babs De Lay’s, offering information concerning Parson and Buck’s stay in Salt Lake during the summer of 1983. When Time’s attorneys contacted Babs De Lay, she told them that she had a “smoking gun:” access to Puss N Boots’ membership book. De Lay claims that she had permission from bar owner Hattie Raddon to use the registry after blacking out all names except Parsons and Buck. Others claim she didn’t and that publicity was her motive since she was more than willing to testify against the lying women. Time, Inc. flew De Lay out for the trial and became the media giant’s star witness. She testified that Parsons and Buck frequently visited Puss N Boots, making her testimony a deciding factor in the suit in favor of Sports Illustrated. When the civil case ended, the presiding federal judge, Clyde Hamilton, asked the FBI to investigate criminal perjury by Parsons and Buck, who both denied ever visiting Puss N Boots. Perjury charges were filed against the pair and in November 1984, both women pleaded guilty to one count of perjury each. In February 1985, they were sentenced to three years in prison—109 days of which they actually served in a Lexington, Kentucky penitentiary. Back in Salt Lake City, Babs De Lay returned to a highly divided lesbian community—including some members that were ready to lynch her. The radical feminists accused her of betraying her lesbian sisters, while conservative lesbians thought she had endangered the security of those women whose names were also on the membership registry. De Lay was ostracized, had death threats made against her, and her home vandalized by outraged Salt Lake lesbians. In a September 1986 article by Mark Taylor for the defunct Utah Holiday magazine, Babs De Lay told her side of

the story and recounted the fear she lived in, for several years, because of lesbians with a vendetta against her. It took almost a whole generation of lesbians, who grew up not knowing the Parson incident, before the community could put this matter to rest; but among older lesbians there is still resentment and deep hurt over the affair. Today Babs De Lay is still host of a women’s radio program on KRCL called “Women, the Third Decade” and is a successful broker and realtor. Her continuing involvement in the lesbian community has Babs De Lay helping the owners of Modiggity’s, a lesbian sports bar, become a success. She served as chair of Mayor Rocky Anderson’s capitol improvements program in 2003, and received her Doctor of Metaphysics in 2002. She performs nondenominational marriages in Utah, and has twin daughters and grandchildren. Parson and Buck are still together, living in Atlanta, Georgia and getting by on $15,000 a year. After the University of South Carolina fired them as a successful basketball coach and player, they have worked as house painters, waitresses, and yard keepers. Parson’s latest claim to fame was during the impeachment trial of President Bill Clinton. She testified before Congress about her imprisonment for lying under oath. When asked by Congressman McCollum to state the nature of her perjury she answered: “Well, it’s really kind of funny. There is a gay bar called Puss and Boots in Salt Lake City, Utah. It wasn’t easy to say I’d been there. That occurrence was two years after the things that I was suing Sports Illustrated for. It wasn’t a pretty picture for me. I thought I had many reasons for why I couldn’t—could say no, but it was an out-and-out lie. I had been there. I finally found what I was looking for—peace,” she said. “I’m not afraid of being found out. I don’t have to lie or concoct an image. It’s an amazing space to be in. It is something I’ve wanted more than a national championship.” Ben Williams is the founder and president of the Utah Stonewall Historical Society at utahstonewallhistoricalsociety.com


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PRIDE COMMUNITY SOFTBALL LEAGUE Moving to later start time by Mandy Q Racer mandy@slmetro.com

Jordan Park has been the home to the Pride Community Softball League for twelve years. This year will be no different, except for a slight change in scheduling that will shift the Sunday starting time from 11:00 am to 2:00 pm. Last year, player attendance tended to be a bit spotty in the mornings. This gave way to squinting, bloodshot stragglers who arrived in the early afternoon. “By one o’ clock they will feel better,” said a laughing Gail Schamanek, a long time volunteer with the league. Daniel Montoya, organizer and scorekeeper extraordinaire, is expecting eight to ten teams this year. “We always have a large group of new players that just found out about the league and are new to the area. So we try to place them on a team or hook them up as a group on one team.” The league meets every Sunday at Jordan Park, 1050 South 1000 West, except for holidays and, of course, Pride weekend. Games will begin at the end of April

and will run through mid August. A large awards banquet will follow the year-end tournament. The cost is $300 for a sponsor and $25 per player, which includes the t-shirt. In addition, at the conclusion of the three-to-four games played each Sunday, a local club will host a late luncheon or a dinner. “We’d really like the league to prosper this year,” Schamanek said. “It’s going to be a great league. It is a lot of fun and it’s a great place for people to meet, not in clubs.” Neither the midsummer heat nor the early-season cold has kept spectators or players from the ball field in years past. The usual fare surrounds the diamond— lawn chairs, coolers and blankets, dogs wearing rainbow leashes, kids sporting HRC gear, kisses shared between same gendered couples ... typical Sundays. Join the league or come to watch; either way, it’s guaranteed to give “one, two, three strikes you’re out” a whole new meaning. For more information contact Daniel Montoya at kaos168@hotmail.com or Gail Schamanek at 541-6000.

FRONTRUNNERS UTAH Running/Walking group in its eigth year By David Samsel

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david@slmetro.com

Do you know how many steps the average American takes in a day? Do you know how many steps you take in a day? Unless you’ve recently watched the movie Super Size Me or have a pedometer strapped on your belt, you probably don’t have an answer for either of those questions. But if you’re a member of Frontrunners Utah, a local group of running and walking enthusiasts, you can rest assured that you’re probably doing better than the average American. Frontrunners is an international organization; Utah’s local chapter was founded in 1997. The group currently has more than 100 members across a wide range of age groups and backgrounds. Frontrunners Utah is open to all members and friends of our community and welcomes new members and visitors throughout the year. The group officially meets three times a week: Sundays, Mondays and Wednesdays. Some members arrange unofficial meetings in addition to the regular three. Sunday is the largest of the three official meetings. The group gathers in front of Barbacoa Mexican Grill (859 E 900 S) at 9:00 a.m. While some members take a longer run through the avenues, most walk or run around Liberty Park. Yes, for all of you who only run after attractive members of the same gender, or only break into a sprint to get into your car on a rainy day, Frontrunners lets you walk. They welcome people of all running

and walking abilities. The weather is warming and Utah Pride is just around the corner. While Pride is widely known for the official and unofficial parade of diverse people through the streets of Salt Lake, it is a less known fact that each year Utah Pride holds a 5k Run/Walk/Roll. The 5k is open to all, including pets. If you’ve ever wanted to participate in an event like this but don’t want to do it alone or without some training, then Frontrunners is the group for you. Not only do they provide the peer pressure and companionship to get—and keep—you moving, but they also offer a variety of helpful and easy-to-understand information on their website. From basic stretching techniques to training for a marathon, Frontrunners has the information and people to help you get started on a more active and healthy lifestyle. Frontrunners Utah offers an alternative to the members of our community seeking an alternative method to meet others with similar values and want to have a more active and healthy lifestyle. So, back to the initial question: How many steps does the average American take in any given day? Here’s a hint: If we are the fattest nation in the world, whatever the answer is, it’s not enough. So get out and join the Frontrunners for a chance to make new friends and move a little more while you’re at it. Frontrunners Utah is online at frontrunnersutah.org.


GAY SOCCER Relaxed Atmosphere Makes Gay Soccer Popular by Brendan Shumway brendan@slmetro.com

For more information, email Kirk Paxman at sportskirk@msn.com

MARCH 31, 2005 ■ SALT LAKE METRO ■ 15

Contrary to recent weather patterns, spring has finally arrived, along with all that comes with it: short shorts, low carb-fraps, general dissolution of seasonal depression —and the return of the increasingly popular Sunday afternoon event known around town as “gay soccer.” What began roughly seven years ago as a small get-together between friends has, over the years, developed into a larger affair usually accumulating enough people for standard-regulation-sized teams and an eager crowd of spectators. Martin Grygar, one of the original “founders” of the group and the long time unofficial captain of the team, is quick to point out that above anything else, the point of the weekly games is really a lot less about skill level or athletic prowess than just showing up and having fun. “The games are very informal and laidback pick-up games,” Grygar says. “You don’t have to be good at it, just come out and have a good time.” And a good time seems to be what keeps bringing people back. Grygar estimates that about three-fourths of the players are weekly players who return year after year. And while the majority of those who show up to play are gay men, there are no restrictions on who can play. “We have a pretty diverse group agewise that play,” he says. “While most of the players are in their late teens to mid-fifties, there have been players that have brought their teenage children as well. We even had a seventy year old man play once.” The games take place every Sunday at Fairmont Park in Sugarhouse and start around 2:30 p.m. This year’s first game will take place on April 3rd, and like previous years, the playing season generally runs spring through fall. While the number of players seems to increase with each playing season, Grgyar also says that given these are outdoor games, weather is a definite factor in actual weekly turnout. The regularly pleasant springtime weather seems to be the largest motivator in drawing the biggest number of people wanting to play, enough so that there is sometimes an overload of people on the playing field. Although there is typically a decrease in turnout during inclement weather and scorching hot summer days, there are usually enough players to form teams and start up a game. “Regardless of how many people show up, we’re pretty laid back and generally don’t rotate players on and off the field,” Grygar says. “People show up, and whether they want to play the whole game or come and go off the field as they want to is fine.” Keeping up with the relaxed nature of the weekly games is the “come as you are” approach for everyone who wants to play, with no official equipment or attire required. In the past, coaches have shown up sporadically, mostly to give out pregame advice and help where they can. But for the most part there are no coaches or referees present, and team members tally the points scored. Grygar admits that it’s not unusual for a game to end when the general consensus of both teams becomes

“next point wins.” Even with the yearly increases in attendance, Grygar says that because of the long playing season they’ve had to mix it up a bit to keep people interested in showing up week after week. Volleyball games of the same pick-me-up nature have cropped up during soccer games, and towards the end of the season they have begun to alternate weekly games with Ultimate Frisbee, which isn’t so stringent in the number of people needed to play. And for those less interested in running the field amongst the throng of sweaty people, spectator participation is another welcome element of Sunday sporting events. What could be better than a Sunday afternoon, post-brunch, wind-down in the park, cheering on the hard working players, all while sipping an iced latte and catching up with friends on the latest gossip of “who wore what last night?” Though Grygar recently and unexpectedly moved out of state, he remains confident that enough people have expressed interest in keeping the event alive, and that despite his absence, the games will continue. So whether you’re a yearly veteran player, have interest in joining up, or just want to be part of the spectator social, weekly “gay soccer” promises—at the very least—an open invitation for all to come out and, above all, just have a good time.


QUEER UTAH AQUATIC CLUB Fadel: The only requirement is that you like to have fun by Joel Shoemaker joel@slmetro.com

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John Funk credits Queer Utah Aquatic Club, Utah’s premier queer swimming organization, for helping him conquer his biggest demon: the water. “I had a horrible swimming experience as a child. I had gotten thrown into a pool, had to be resuscitated, the ambulance, the whole thing. Since, I’ve been pretty afraid of the water,” he says. For a milestone birthday last year, John decided it was time to overcome his fear; his then-partner convinced him to try QUAC. “It was really scary the first few times,” he says. “The first time I tried diving, I went to get up on the edge of the pool, but it was too much. I went outside and threw up.” But practice after practice, John says he’s gained more skill, more confidence, and more trust in his own ability in the water. He’s now able to swim several strokes, even though he says the breaststroke hasn’t quite clicked yet. As one of Utah’s largest sports-based GLBT organizations, John’s story is just one of many at QUAC. Head coach and founder Doug Fadel prides QUAC on being open to swimmers of all abilities, from beginners to serious competitors. The point is simple, he says, to get better than where you’re at. “And we’re actively recruiting new members. The only requirement is that you like to have fun,” he says. Started by Fadel and eight others in 1995, the group has grown each year to over a hundred active members on its current rosters. Eight coaches help lead technique practices three nights a week and polo practice on Sundays, and they’re adding another polo practice soon. The group is active at local competitions and is a member of International Gay and Lesbian Aquatics (IGLA) to which they travel each year to compete, as well as to other national competitions. But while competitions may be the highlight for some, many find the group to be a most inviting organization that fosters friendly socializing while helping its members improve their aquatic talent. Some members even find talents they

never knew they had. After years of playing volleyball, Barbara Nash decided to take up swimming as a sport that wasn’t so hard on her knees. The thought of doing laps alone in a “cement box filled with water” didn’t appeal to her, so she checked into QUAC knowing Fadel through another organization. “I didn’t think I would like it,” she says. After just a few months, she realized her swimming ability had been sleeping under the surface. “I have never swam competitively in my life ... but I went to my first meet and was surprised to find how fast I am.” Nash went on to break two state records in the 50- and 100-yard breaststroke, and Fadel says her times rank some of the highest in the nation. She credits much of finding her ability to QUAC. “If I had just gone to the U of U alone and got in the pool, I would have done about 6 laps and said, ‘This sucks.’” As one of the group’s transgender members, Nash reflects what many say about the group’s welcoming atmosphere. Many members say it’s a positive social setting to meet other people—a setting that isn’t easily available elsewhere. Fadel says the common goal of improving your skill helps foster that environment. “When you join a group and you’re doing the same thing, you have that in common. It’s easier to go up and talk to someone about the technique you’re working on, so much easier than going up and having to start a conversation with someone you don’t know cold,” he says. Many members credit much of the group’s success to Fadel himself, joining QUAC because they knew Fadel from other organizations; both Funk and Nash knew him from his work at The Center. Between organizing several practices a week, travel schedules for competitions, pool reservations, events to support local fundraisers, and more, many would find leadership of the group daunting, but not Fadel. And he does it all as a volunteer. “Paid?!” he says. “If I got paid I wouldn’t care as much!” For practice times, location and other information about QUAC go to www.quacquac.org.


WOMEN’S BOWLING LEAGUE Women’s Community Bowling League Still Going Strong After Twenty Years by Kim Russo kim@slmetro.com

In 1984, a woman named Tammy formed a bowling league for the women’s community. The league began with sixteen teams on board and played at Cottonwood Bowling. They remained there for five years before moving league play to Sue Rich Bowling, which remains their current home. The bowling league’s season runs from September to April of each year. The women’s bowling league is comprised of a group of women who not only enjoy the sport of bowling, but have also developed strong bonds of friendship with one another. Perhaps these friendships go further, as they all appear to be a very strong family unit. They have extended their friendships beyond league play by socializing with one another through other activities and social events throughout the year. It’s evident the bonds of friendship are strong as you watch the interactions of the bowlers as they all convene to participate in their league play each Sunday. This year, the league is under the leadership of Jean Myrup (president), Vickie Oakden (vice-president), and Ann Christensen (secretary). All three women volunteer their time toward making sure the league is well-organized and functioning at a fun, and yet professional, level each week. Currently, the league has ten teams competing. With team names ranging from “B The Ball” to “Cardiac Kids,” these women enjoy the friendly competitiveness that occurs on any formalized league play. As of March 13th, “B The Ball” and “Whatever” were in the top standings, although league rankings can change from week to week. Also, the league has recognized Stephanie Thomas for scoring a 277 during a single game and Nancy Moore for holding the highest score ever at 279. The unique aspect of this women’s league is that they have managed to stay

active for twenty years—and they intend to stay around for many more years to come. What draws the women to participate and stay active varies with each one. The president of the league, Jean Myrup, sums up the importance the league holds for her and so many others. “In winter,” Myrup said, “it is often hard to get together with friends. During our winter league we get the opportunity to see each other every week.” Myrup says that some of the bowlers have been with the league since 1984. As she sees it, it’s been a great honor and privilege to become a family and grow older together. “I consider them all family,” she says. Another bowler, Lori “Murt” Bennett, who also has been playing with the league for twenty years, adds to Myrup’s vision and says that she has a love and friendship like none other for the women who play on the league. While most bowling leagues hold an end-of-year banquet within the city, the women’s bowling league dares to be different. Each year at the conclusion of the season, they all venture to Wendover. They spend a weekend together enjoying each other’s company and recognizing the bowlers that have gained top honors within the league. This family of bowlers not only plays together, but travels together too. LEAGUE STANDINGS AS OF MARCH 13 1. “B” The Ball 1. “Whatever” 3. Any Action 4. Cardiac Kids 5. Lois Lanes 6. Pin Spankers 7. Split Happens 8. Lickitty Splits 9. Lucky Strike 10. S.O.L. If you are interested in joining the league, please contact Rich at the Sue Rich Bowling Lanes at 467-0642.

MARCH 31, 2005 ■ SALT LAKE METRO ■ 17


Wine and White Lies: through April 9 at Unknown Gallery, 353 W. 200 South. Admission is free; information at 521-4721.

THE GAY AGENDA by Eric Tierney

31THURSDAY

1FRIDAY

What happens when blue-collar people Red and Blue America? This Friday’s listescape their upbringing and enter the ings highlight the disconnect between upwardly mobile world of George Bush’s Red and Blue Utah: Some of you will be America? They do crazy things to breed thrilled to hear about comedian BILL the lower-caste remnants out of their ENGVALL’S visit to our fair city. One of children, like getting them into presthe stars of that Jeff Foxworthy redneck tigious preschools before sketch show, Engvall will delight you the tots can even talk. This with witticisms about hunting and obsession with class and trucks and guns or something. caste is at the heart of BRIGHT Others will be glad to know that they IDEAS, a tragicomedy writstill have the chance to see WINE & ten by Eric Coble opening WHITE LIES, an exhibit of paintings by tonight at the University of DANIEL NUZMAN that are both beautiUtah’s Lab Theatre/Studio Playwright Eric Coble ful and hauntingly dark at the aptly 115. I hear Woody and Soonnamed Unknown Gallery, which conYi had their kid on a waitlist within three sistently offers some of the city’s most days of conception. 7:30pm through Saturday. Matinees Friday dynamic art shows. Viva le difference! at 4:30pm and Sunday at 2pm at the Lab Theatre/Studio 115, University of Utah campus. Tickets $7.00 at 581-7100 or arttix.org

Bill Engvall: 8pm, Kingsbury Hall, Presidents’ Circle at the University of Utah. Tickets $29.75 at 581-7100 or kingsburyhall.com

 Also tonight, RIRIE WOODBURY DANCE COMPANY hosts their CABARET OF FOOLS annual benefit and auction. The website encourages dress that is “charmingly flamboyant” or “roguishly debonair.” If that’s not enough to get you in the door, I suggest that you take a good hard look at how this gay thing is working out for you. Also, this is your chance not only to mingle with beautiful dancer types, but to support one of out city’s most important cultural institutions. Or, you know, go see the hillbilly guy. I have no judgments about either. 7pm to 11pm at The Grand America Hotel, 555 S Main. Tickets $75 at 297-4235.

2SUNDAY The phrase “triple threat” has become common parlance in describing acts with multiple talents. Most of the time it means that the performer is mediocre in three different ways, but not so with the KINSEY SICKS, who are an amazingly talented singing group, razor sharp satirists, and quality drag performers. They’ll bring their “feast of music and comedy,” which has been entertaining the nation for more than a decade, to Salt Lake tonight as part of, to the institution’s credit, Salt Lake Community College’s Multi-Cultural and Diversity Programming Initiative. I guess everyone loves

CP’s Chuck ‘n Chevey with the RCGSE

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SALT LAKE METRO ■ MARCH 31, 2005

Present A Redneck W eddin’ Weddin’

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Proceeds to benefit the RCGSE General Fund and the

Crown Prince Chuck Whyte and

Crown Princess Chevy Suburban

Wood like U to show up to theyr weddin’. The church will opin at 8:00 pm and the preecher should git there at 9:00. He’ He’ss fancy so we’ll need $6 from you to watch’em bee hitched.

comedy—let’s just hope none of the Sicks decides to sport a short-sleeved white button-down and nondescript blue tie. They’d be lucky to make it out alive. 8pm, The Grand Theatre, 1575 S. State. Tickets $10 at the Grand Theatre Box Office.

 Shakespeare’s much maligned play THE MERCHANT OF VENICE is not as hateful as you think. The play’s anti-Semitism is certainly hard to endure, but Shylock is not the piece’s only villain—the play exists in a world where no one is truly virtuous, where everyone acts on their dark impulses, and people constantly betray the ones they love. At the center of the piece is Antonio, the titular merchant, who is one of Shakespeare’s most homoerotic characters. See the play and judge its merits for yourself. 7:30pm, Terrace Plaza Playhouse, 4700 S. Washington, Ogden. Tickets $8.00-$11.00 at 801-393-0070.

 Former Utah-based author Antonio A. Feliz’ (Out of the Bishop’s Closet) is returning to the beehive state for a book signing on his latest work BECOMING OPEN SOULS. An unabashedly theological work which explores the connection between the LDS church and Native American traditions. 2pm, Golden Braid Books, 151 S. 500 East . Free, 322-1162. concordpressinternational.com

3SUNDAY Well, another LDS General Conference is upon us. Many of you head out to the killer conference weekend parties afterward, by why not check out AFFIRMATION’S ANNUAL FIRESIDE AND MISSION REUNION. Confessions of a Mormon Boy writer and star STEPHEN FALES will be featured. Attendees are encouraged to bring a casserole, salad or desert for the potluck—temple garments optional. 5:30pm, Metropolitan Community Church, 823 South 600 East. Free, affirmation.org

5TUESDAY Does SLAC never stop? One minute they’re commissioning scripts from the likes of JT Rogers, the next they’re holding staged readings of innovative new plays, and now another world premiere from acclaimed Utah playwright Julie Jensen! This is one ambitious theatre, ladies and gentlemen. Julie Jensen’s previous plays for the company include White Money, Wait!, Two-Headed and the award winning Last Lists of My Mad Mother. Her latest, DUST EATERS, covers 140 years of the struggle between the Goshute tribe and Utah’s pioneers. 8pm, 7:30pm Wednesdays and Thursdays, 8pm Fridays and Saturdays, 2pm and 7pm Sundays through May 1, Salt Lake Acting Company, 168 W 500 North. Tickets at 363SLAC or arttix.org

 That show where the people dance around with garbage cans strapped to their feet is back. You know, STOMP? It’s pretty cool to watch, but just writing about it gives me a splitting headache. Enjoy! 7:30pm through Thursday, 8:00pm Friday and Saturday, 7:00pm Sunday. Matinees at


4pm Saturday and 2pm Sunday, Kingsbury Hall, President’s Circle at the University of Utah. Tickets $22–$42.50 at 581-7100 or kingsburyhall.com.

6WEDNESDAY In the eighties, being in a successful band meant you had a high-maintenance hairstyle and shopped at Fredericks of Hollywood. In the 2000s or whatever we’re calling them, being in a successful band means that you weigh 135 pounds and seldom attend to your hair at all. Witness the ALL AMERICAN REJECTS—reedy boys with floppy hair singing about love and loss. I wish I could muster some hipster contempt for cookie cutter bands, but the songs are catchy and the boys are cute. What more do you want? 6pm, In the Venue, 219 South 600 West. Tickets $12.00 at 467-TIXX or smithstix.com.

7THURSDAY What can you say about JERRY SEINFELD, God of Comedy, that hasn’t already been said? Well, how about the way he . . . no, that’s been covered. Guess I’ll just mention that he’ll be playing Salt Lake again tonight, bringing “did you ever notices”’ and “what’s the deal withs” back to the City by the Pestilent Sea. He’s performing his new act, which I understand deals extensively with fatherhood. Be careful though, Jerry. Bill Cosby always wins a turf war. 7pm and 9:30pm though tomorrow, Abravanel Hall, 123 W. Temple. Tickets $75 at 355-ARTS or arttix.org

8FRIDAY Ah, the glorious coming of spring: Cadbury eggs, tulips, and BALLET WEST’S SPRING SENSATION. It’s time once again for the company’s spring repertory program, which this year will feature choreography by Balanchine and the music of Bach and Gershwin. I will spare you the inevitable crack about athletic young men in revealing clothing. 7:30pm through April 16, 2:00pm on April 16, Capitol Theatre, 50 W. 200 South. Tickets $17-$65 at 355-ARTS or arttix.org.

 Bingo used to be about little blue-haired ladies passing a quiet afternoon. Well Gay

ALL-AMERICAN REJECTS. See Wednesday, April 6

Bingo with the Cyber Sluts will probably have the blue hair, but these aren’t ladies and it won’t be quiet. Tonight, The Center is hosting “Springtime in Utah” themed bingo, so dig out your Easter bonnets, General Conference attire, or winter coats (well, for this year’s “springtime” anyway). Proceeds will benefit The Center, contestants play for fabulous prizes. 7pm, The Center Multi-Purpose Room, 355 North 300 West. $5 admission includes first gameboard. 539-8800.

10SUNDAY The Center presents its third biannual COMMUNITY TOWN HALL MEETING this afternoon. Focused on discussing the pressing needs, issues and concerns of queer Utah, the goal is to keep community dialogue alive. So to all you highly opinionated people who constantly drone on about how you would run things if you were in charge, this is the time to share your ideas and concerns. 3pm, Head Start administrative offices, 1307 South 900 West. Free to all members of the public, but please RSVP to Jennifer Nuttall at Jennifer@glbtccu.org or 539-8800 x 13.

11MONDAY Come walk through fields of gold with STING tonight; within ten minutes, he’ll have you wrapped around his finger, but exercise caution or he’ll scream at you not to stand so close to him. Want me to go on? I could. Tickets are expensive, but hopefully you won’t have to sell your body to the night. 7:30pm, Delta Center, Tickets $36-$58.50 at 325-SEAT or ticketmaster.com

12TUESDAY Once and for all people, the Irish dance style with the flying legs and stiff arms is not called “Riverdance!” It’s called “step dancing,” and you’ll seem some very fine execution of it tonight when celebrated Celtic fiddle player EILEEN IVERS and IMMIGRANT SOUL get their Erie groove on. 7:30pm, Kingsbury Hall, Presidents’ Circle at the University of Utah. Tickets $24-$32 at 581-7100 or arttix.org.

Plan B’s Tragedy: A Tragedy—not so tragic by Eric J. Tierney eric@slmetro.com

Continues at 8pm through Saturday, 2pm and 7pm Sunday, Studio Theatre at the Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $18 at 355-ARTS or arttix.org

MARCH 31, 2005 ■ SALT LAKE METRO ■ 19

Night falls. In an age where the news media will report on anything from the dangers of riding escalators to exposés on the relative size of the dried fruit in your morning cereal (“It’s not nearly as plump as the box would have us believe!”), can an event as inane as a sunset be spun into something worthy of the nightly news? Will Eno’s Tragedy: a tragedy, the new Plan-B Theatre Company production running at the Rose Wagner, answers the question with an emphatic—and slightly horrified—of course it can! The play is staged as a special report by the crackerjack on-air news team of a midsize city. The anchor and his three correspondents are tracking a breaking story: darkness has, with the ending of daytime, mysteriously enveloped the city. Reporters in the field are there to perform those essential functions of the Fourth Estate, interpreting events, providing context, and engaging in fantastical speculation. If you’re thinking Broadcast News, you’re way off—the piece’s rhetoric and action are as surreal as its form is familiar, with dialogue worthy of and heavily influenced by Beckett. Anchorman Frank (the amiable Tyler Johnson) sits center stage, at the news desk, and deftly keeps the action flowing by cutting to his field reporters: seasoned news vet John (an astonishing Jay Perry), slightly off kilter Constance (Teresa Sanderson) and legal expert Michael (hilariously interpreted by Colleen Baum), all of whom are present throughout the piece. As the show progresses, the broadcast falls apart, the characters questioning their work, its meaning, and its relevance. These are people who cannot seem to determine where they end and their news personae begin, a situation that highlights one of the play’s central themes: if we create our worlds from the information fed to us by the media, how are we to know what is real and what is merely generated to fill space? Such ponderous notions are, thankfully,

treated delicately and with humor. Each of the actors, especially Mr. Johnson, has mastered the mannerisms and speaking style of the broadcast news personality, lending the proceedings a delicious irony. The text features hilarious digressions and incredible wordplay. The brilliant exploitation of the television news format creates a structure of tension and release, as the frantic broadcast is interrupted frequently when the local affiliate switches to the national feed, giving the characters a moment to smoke, do tai-chi, or reapply their makeup. There are also sudden, unexpectedly poignant moments in the midst of all the chaos, especially from the wonderful Mr. Perry, who makes time seem to stand still during a speech in which his character falls apart before viewers’ eyes, causing him to remark that “everywhere you look, you see your life no longer there.” Randy Rasmussen’s clever set isolates all the actors from one another, the anchorman in his studio and the reporters upstage, framed in stylized television monitors. All of their communication takes place technologically, through the airwaves, a device which points to another of the play’s ideas: the more sophisticated our methods of communication seem to get, the more isolated and disconnected from one another we seem to become. It is only when a “witness to the scene” takes over, in an eloquent performance by Barb Gandy, that any genuine communication takes place. In the ruins of the broadcast on the stage and in our media-saturated modern life, her message is clear and vital: the world is real, we are all here together, and nothing is as bad as it seems. Comforting notions to bear in mind the next time you watch the evening news. Or better yet, turn the set off and go to the theatre.


EarPiece Earpiece: Sin City by Eric J. Tierney eric@slmetro.com

Kinsey Sicks to Perform in Grand Theater

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SALT LAKE METRO ■ MARCH 31, 2005

by John Wilkes You’ve seen one drag show you’ve seen them all, right? Wrong! Prepare for “waves of nausea, jitters and panic attacks,” when America’s Favorite Dragapella Beauty Shop Quartet, the Kinsey Sicks, descend upon Salt Lake Community College’s Grand Theater on Saturday, April 2. The Kinsey Sicks took their name from a perfect six on Alfred Kinsey’s sexuality scale, which denotes absolute queerness. The group was born in 1993 when Harvard Law School alum Ben Schatz and friends attended a Bette Midler concert in San Francisco dressed as the Andrews Sisters. “We just knew that the room would be filled with drag queens,” explains Ben’s alter ego, Rachel. “We were shocked to discover that we were the only drag queens within miles—other than Bette.” On the way home they sang together, sounded good, began performing in the Castro District and soon had gigs lined up and down the block. The attention they’ve received since has been phenomenal. Their Studio 54 smash performance, “Dragapella,” was a Best Musical of 2001 nominee for the Lortel Award, Off-Broadway’s equivalent to the Tony.

They’ve performed at a diverse mixture of colleges, from Bryn Mawr to the University of Wyoming and at such prestigious venues as L.A.’s Roxy Theatre and Harrah’s in Lake Tahoe and Reno. The group has enjoyed rave reviews in major publications like Billboard and the New York Times. They’ve appeared on ABC’s 20/20, CBS’ Early Show with Bryant Gumbel, and on the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation. To date they’ve released four very well-received CDs of superb a cappella singing. The Sicks’ current incarnation consists of Schatz and Irwin Keller as Winnie, the two remaining original members, as well as Chris Dilley (Trampolina), who joined in 1998, and Jeff Manabat (Trixie), who arrived last year. One might wonder what possessed two prominent activist lawyers and two veteran performers to abandon their paying jobs for a whirlwind life of cross-dressing, madness and a cappella. Winnie explains, “We’re big hams; we love the stage and the audience interaction. The show’s an opportunity to expose people to messages they should hear, and they’re more receptive because of the mode of presentation.” What can the audience expect at a typical performance? “A delicate balance of political satire and joyous raunch,” according to Winnie. The troupe’s repertoire includes send-ups of popular tunes, like “AZT” (“A-B-C”), “Beaver” (“Fever”), “I Will Swallow Him,” and “Fetish” (“Cherish”). The title song of “Dragapella” promises “…barbershop meets Barbarella; more fun than salmonella.” This one-night-only appearance will mark their Sicks’ Utah debut. Irwin says, “We’ve driven through—even pulled over and tasted the salt flats once. It was just a quick oral experience. We’re honored to be invited by the college.” At press time all tickets are $10. CDs and T-shirts will be available for purchase. Proceeds benefit the Utah AIDS Foundation and The Center. Showtime is 8:00pm. For more information, contact Gordon Storrs at 957-4562.

I promised myself that I would take a more positive tone in this week’s column, since my persistent persnickety comments are no doubt wearing on you after all this time, gentle reader. I meditated, I drank tea, I took St. John’s Wort, I read Deepak Chopra, I did any number of things designed to make my irritable personality more palatable. I was making real progress, too, until I opened up the current issue of Premiere magazine, in which the creative forces of that fine publication (it’s probably my favorite movie mag) rank the fifty greatest movie stars of all time. Imagine my disgust, my moral indignation, when these brain-dead people elected to rank Doris Day as 24 and Elizabeth Taylor—ELIZABETH TAYLOR— as number 40! Of course, lists like this are nothing if not arbitrary and it is impossible to quantify star quality, which is a pretty nebulous thing. But I think we’d all agree that Liz Taylor had a bit more impact on the zeitgeist than Doris Day, right? Day made a career out of grinning idiotically and having bedtime telephone conversations with Rock Hudson, the man of her dreams—a man who turned out to be a homosexual. Liz Taylor was unlucky in love, to be sure, but she knew a Rock from a Dick, you know? Please indulge me for a moment while I repeat my mantra. “I am a hollow reed, and trouble flows through me like the wind.” Ah ... that’s better. Sin City opens this week, a film that I have been looking forward to for some time. I hopped online the other day to visit the official movie site and made the unfortunate assumption that the URL was sincity.com. I was, to put it succinctly, incorrect. I was confronted on the site with any number of images that no decent young gay man should have to look at. I will caution you by saying only this: there were boobs. The movie’s actual website is at sincitythemovie.com, and I highly recommend a visit. Here’s a bit of background on the project for those of you not familiar with it: the film is based on the comics of Frank Miller, who draws in a style that could well be described as post-modern noir, full of bleak cityscapes, dreary rainstorms, and endless black and white vistas. The occasional bursts of color in his panels are shocking and vibrant, occurring amidst all that gray: a startling yellow here, a thrilling bit of red there. His stories are equally dark, following the antiheroes who reside in the titular metropolis, a savage, violent, treacherous place. In the grand tradition of film noir and pulp fiction, all these

people are flawed and none are purely good. More than a few of them, though, are purely bad. There are a lot of reasons to look forward to the picture. Director Robert Rodriquez—best known for those Antonio Banderas shoot-em-ups and the Sky Kids franchise—was able to secure the rights to make the film only after literally presenting his vision to Miller by making a short film based on a vignette in one of the comics. His approach, which is uniquely selfless of a major Hollywood director, is to recreate, frame for frame and cell for cell, what is on the page. Rodriguez has chafed in interviews about the use of the term “adaptation” in describing the movie. He prefers to think of it as a translation. The result will be a comic book movie that lives up to its source material because it will, by and large, still be the source material. Then there’s the cast, who provides all the color the cinematography lacks: Bruce Willis as the ailing copper with a heart of gold. Mickey Rourke, America’s Favorite Hoodlum, is the loner avenging his lost love. The list of quality talent goes on and on: Benicio del Tori, Clive Owen, Brittany Murphy, my future husband Elijah Wood, Nick Stahl, Michael Clark Duncan, and more. Even the ranks of TV do-gooders trying to break out into bad-girl Hollywood roles are represented: isn’t-that-

sweet Gilmore Girl Alexis Bledel playing a stripper? Looks like we’re not in Stars Hollow anymore! What’s really going to sell this movie to you, though, is the sheer artistry of the filmmaking. Last year’s Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow was beautiful, sure, but it lacked a compelling story and well-drawn characters. Sin City will take the same visual bravura and add to it a well-told story of fear, loathing and redemption, peopled with characters that highlight the two-dimensionality not only of their comic book compatriots like the Man of Steel and the Dark Knight, but of most Hollywood movie characters. So go out and see the film. You’ll enjoy it, I promise. Next year though, when Premiere puts together a list of Best Comic Book Movies, and puts Sin City somewhere beneath The Hulk or The Shadow, remember to take a deep breath and say your mantra. You won’t believe how much it helps.


Café Trio by Vanessa Chang vanessa@slmetro.com

680 South 900 East, Salt Lake City (801) 533-8746 Monday-Thursday 11am-10pm Friday-Saturday 11am-10:30pm Sunday Brunch 10am-4pm

MARCH 31, 2005 ■ SALT LAKE METRO ■ 21

Everyone has a perpetually cool friend— painfully stylish (standing next to him or her makes you feel like Alice from The Brady Bunch) with fashionable threads, a choppy haircut, and enough attitude to punch Whitney Houston in the face. And oh yeah, s/he also happens to be the most unreliable and flaky person in the world. In the restaurant world, Café Trio is like that really cool friend. Casual, sophisticated, and lovely, cool is what you feel just walking in and taking a seat. But, like that friend, it s also inconsistent. Everyone loves this place there s no doubt that the digs are slick, minimalist, and hip, while still relaxed and casual. The servers look like they were culled from the Rolodex of the Casablanca modeling agency. But for all its pros, folks seem eager to let the cons slip past like a disillusioned octogenarian billionaire does with a trophy wife apparently it s just that pretty and that cool. The appetizer du jour is the eye-candy staff. But staring at them doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll get better service. Some days service is totally lacking and you spend half the time surveying the room not for beautiful people, but for the server who was supposed to get you the check half an hour ago. On a recent visit, my companion encountered some “hairy water.” Our server was prompt, apologetic and without blinking got him another glass—which also had some form of sea monkey in it. Still nicely, she got him yet another glass. She was unobstrusive and helpful, plus I didn’t have to wait around for the check. She redeemed her colleagues. A wood-burning oven at the entryway provides a blistered crust to all the

flatbreads and pizzas. Rosemary flatbread, served with warm goat cheese, roasted peppers, tomatoes, and a balsamic glaze is wonderfully messy in a place pumping with techno (à la Banana Republic) and modern lines on the furniture. Though the wonderful crusts can sometimes be overburdened with ambitious toppings (like a five-cheese pizza), the overall flavors work, with the BBQ chicken a prime example. One good thing about Trio is that prices are reasonable, even with the modest, if well-thought-out wine list. As a lunch destination, the sandwiches, pizzas, and flatbreads are your best bet for consistently good food. The Trio lemon chicken salad also makes a great light meal with briny caper berries and crisp greens. But be wary of pairing it with the white bean soup; bland at best, it only took on life (barely) after fishing out chunks of the grated asiago. When it comes to pasta, Trio has a fetish for cloyingly heavy cream sauces. The special on the day I visited featured an insipid mix of thin cream, overcooked asparagus and penne, and artichoke hearts. Even my companion, who loves Trio, conceded that it was not good at all. However, his chicken piccata sandwich was delicious with juicy breaded chicken, fontina, and a lemoncaper-basil aioli. Your best bet for pasta is perhaps the humblest of all: the huge Trio meatball, which sits atop a nest of nicely cooked pasta with a substantial tomato sauce. For all you Aqua Teen Hunger Force fans out there, it may be the actual size of the beloved Meat Wad. And it is pretty damn good. Another perennial winner is the maple-glazed pork with a cider glaze and spicy polenta. Desserts are rich (if overly sweet), but the pudding and seasonal lemon tart are safe bets. If they only served Sunday brunch’s challah French toast every day, there’d be a stellar dessert available all the time. True, Café Trio is a much-needed dose of casual sophistication. And just like those beautiful flaky friends you always manage to stay with, it s perfectly tolerable in limited quantities.


Di ing Guide Dining de SALT LAKE CITY, UT

Orbit Cafe

Café Med

orbitslc.com

420 E. 3300 S. / 493-0100 HOURS: SU-TH 11AM-9PM F-SA 11AM-10PM CUISINE: MEDITERRANEAN PRICE: $ CARDS: TC AE D MC V

Persian, Greek, Italian, Turkish and Vegetarian in a warm, relaxing atmosphere.

Coffee Garden 898 S 900 E / 355-3425 HOURS: SU-TH 6AM-11PM F-SA 6AM-12AM CUISINE: COFFEEHOUSE PRICE: ¢ CARDS: AE D MC V

SLC’s buzzing java shop with a diverse crowd. Sandwiches, desserts, sidewalk dining.

Fiddler’s Elbow 1063 E. 2100 S. / 463-9393

fiddlerselbowslc.com M-TH 11AM-11PM F-SA 11AM-12AM SU 9AM-10PM CUISINE: AMERICAN PRICE: $ CARDS: TC AE D MC V HOURS:

Panini 299 S. MAIN ST. / 535-4300

panini.us HOURS:

CUISINE: RESERV.: PRICE: CARDS:

M-F 11:30AM-3PM M-TH 5-9PM F-SA 5-10PM ITALIAN, SEAFOOD SUGGESTED $$$ TC AE D MC V

Robust Italian fare in an elegant atmosphere with a tasteful, contemporary vibe.

Salt Lake Pizza & Pasta 1063 E. 2100 S. / 484-1804

saltlakepizzaandpasta.com HOURS: CUISINE: PRICE: CARDS:

M-SA 11AM-11PM SU 11AM-10PM ITALIAN $ TC AE D MC V

Michelangelo Ristorante

Xiao Li

HOURS: CUISINE: PRICE: CARDS:

TU-SA 11:30AM-1:30PM 5:45-9PM ITALIAN $$ AE D MC V

Begun by childr\hood friends Paulo Celeste and Marco Gabrielli of Tuscany.

Nick-N-Willy’s Pizza

307 W. 200 SOUTH / 328-8688 HOURS: LUNCH: 1130AM-2:30PM DINNER: 4:30-10PM F-SA 4:30-11PM CUISINE: CHINESE PRICE: $ CARDS: TC AE D MC V

The restaurant that serves the most authentic Szechwan and Mandarin cuisine.

WEST VALLEY CITY

4538 S, HIGHLAND DR./ 273-8282

Gringo’s West Valley

nicknwillyspizza.com

2785 W 3500 S / 969-8811 HOURS: M-SA 10:30AM-9PM SU 10:30AM-8PM CUISINE: MEXICAN PRICE: ¢ CARDS: MC V

SU-TH 11AM-10PM F-SA 11AM-12PM CUISINE: PIZZA PRICE: $ CARDS: AE D MC V HOURS:

Dine in or take-out. Call ahead and we’ll have it ready. Albertsons Shopping Ctr.

SALT LAKE METRO ■ MARCH 31, 2005

Open late nights on Fridays and Saturdays with DJs and a special menu.

Voted as Utah’s Best Pizza two years in a row! Great beer selection. Sugarhouse.

michelangeloristorante.com

SU-TH 11AM-10PM F-SA 11AM-3AM CUISINE: AMERICAN ECLECTIC PRICE: $ CARDS: TC AE D MC V HOURS:

32 beers to choose from, including Utah’s best selection of microbrews. 2156 S, HIGHLAND DR./ 466-0961

22

540 W. 200 S. / 322-3808

Good Mexican food...fast. Fresh salsa bar, food made to order. See our coupon!

Red,White Bubbly Spice World by Beau Jarvis beau@slmetro.com

Do you crave spicy food? Is one of the joys in your life getting all misty-eyed over a spicy plate of curry? When most of us hear the words “spicy food,” we think of throat-burning, perspiration-inducing spice. Yet there’s more to spicy cuisine than watering eyes and flaming mouths. Consider the following spice categories: Savory spice, Mexican/Southwestern spice, Asian spice, and sweet spice. How on earth does one select wine for such spices? It can be tricky. Read on, and I’ll do my best to help. SAVORY SPICE Savory spice is familiar to most of us. For example, take a slice of pepperoni pizza. It’s got black pepper, onions, garlic, and for those who crave spice, perhaps a shake or two of Cayenne pepper. This spice combo presents the wine adventurer with two red wine options: 1) Subtle & crisp or 2) Bold & fruity. Subtle & crisp wines include mostly old world reds like Italian Barbera d’Asti, French Côtes du Rhône, and Spanish Rioja. These wines will accent your pepperoni slice by highlighting its spice components on your tongue. In this instance, wine acts as the backup band to the singing savory spice combo. Perhaps you would rather go bold. Bold & fruity reds include Australian Shiraz, Californian Red Zinfandel, and Californian Petite Sirah. These big boys will act as a reset button for your tongue—take a sip and pizza is mostly erased from the tongue’s taste memory. Which is better? Try both wine styles and let your palette decide. Wine recommendations: Taurino Salice Salentino, ’00 ($12) from Puglia, Italy (subtle & crisp); Bogle Petite Sirah, ’02 ($10) from California (bold & fruity) MEXICAN/SOUTHWESTERN SPICE This is one diverse category. It includes nearflammable chili peppers, earthy mole, salsa, cilantro, and zesty citrus. Dish yourself up a green chili quesadilla with spicy salsa. Now, before you pop open a bottle of cerveza, think about the kind of wine that could possibly taste good in this instance. Again, let me provide you with two options: 1) Light, crisp, slightly sweet white wine or 2) Bold & fruity red wine. The light whites include German Riesling, French Vouvray, and California Chenin Blanc. These wines work because they are a little bit sweet and a little bit zesty (kind of like a salt-rimmed Margarita). White wines of this ilk will accent the food and tame any spice-fire in your salsa. If you’re feeling a little more aggressive, fight fire with fire. Pit a

big ol’ heavy red fruit-bomb against this dish and prepare for a tasty wrestling match on your tongue. Big red wine will do its best to extinguish burning taste buds with concentrated, fruity flavors. Have a flavor Fiesta, give both wine styles a try. Wine recommendations: Beringer Chenin Blanc, ’02 ($7) from California (light, crisp, sightly sweet); Cline Ancient Vines Mouvérde, ’03 ($13) from California (big red) ASIAN SPICE I’m sure a studious foodie out there could author an entire treatise on the near-infinite spice combinations in Asian cuisine. Today, let’s pull our Asian spice example from Thailand. Picture a mouth-watering platter of chicken satays with spicy peanut sauce. How on earth could any wine handle soy sauce, peanut sauce, spicy red peppers, garlic, and onions? It’s tricky, yet it can be done. In this instance, our wine needs to be full-bodied, slightly spicy, and aromatic enough to register in this sea of spices. Let’s go with two fragrant heavy hitters: Alsatian Gewurztraminer (from France) or California Viognier. These white wines offer spicy aroma, tangy flavors, and tongue-protecting viscosity (i.e. this wine is thick and sticky). Take a sip. You’ll notice nutty flavors of the peanut sauce slipping through the spice wall. You may also enjoy the sensation of lasting tangy wine flavors hanging out with the spicy red peppers. Wine recommendation: Smoking Loon Viognier, ’02 ($9) from California SWEET SPICE Perhaps you are thinking, “Isn’t sweet spice an Oxymoron?” Not exactly. Consider Northern African cuisine (Morocco, Algeria). You’ll find cloves, cinnamon, cardamom, and even mint used as major spice ingredients. One of my favorite sweet spice dishes is couscous with toasted almonds, dates and green onions spiced with lemon, cinnamon and cloves. Fortunately, we won’t need to introduce a new wine category to handle this dish. We can grab two of the white wine styles mentioned above: 1) Light, crisp, slightly sweet and 2) Full-bodied, spicy, aromatic. A lighter white wine, such as Chenin Blanc, will accent sweet spices. Full-bodied white wine, like Viognier, will not only accent sweet spices, but also turn up the flavor volume on the almonds and green onions. My preference in this case is Viognier with the couscous dish. In fact, each time I sip Viognier with my sweet, spicy, nutty couscous, I become a little giddy. I dust off my eighties albums, put on Combat Rock by the Clash and dance around the house singing Rock the Casbah. Who knew that the old adage, “Spice up your life,” could be taken literally? Cheers. Beau Jarvis is a sommelier and wine educator. He operates basicjuice.com, a wine review and info website. He also runs basicjuice.blogs.com


MARCH 31, 2005 ■ SALT LAKE METRO ■ 23


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SALT LAKE METRO ■ MARCH 31, 2005


Bar Guide Club 161* 161 S. Pueblo St (1440 W.) 363-8161 / club161.com HOURS: M&W 7pm-2am TH–SU 2pm-2am CLOSED TUES GAY: Every Day AGE: 21+ / COVER: No Levi, Leather, Fetish. M Fetish Night, TH Underwear Night, F Leather/Bear

Comics ADAM AND ANDY by James Asal

Club Panini* 299 S. Main Street 535-4300 / panini.us HOURS: M–TH 11am-10pm F–SA 11am-12am GAY: Mondays AGE: 21+ / COVER: No Speed dating first Mondays of the month.

Club Try-Angles* 251 W. 900 South 364-3203 clubtry-angles.com HOURS: 2pm-2am daily GAY: Every day AGE: 21+ / COVER: No FR-SA DJ Boy Toy. MO “MorMondays.” TU, FR, SA–$1 drafts. SU afternoons–Buffet.

Heads Up* 163 W. Pierpont Ave. (240 S) / 359-2161 headsupslc.com HOURS: 4pm-2am daily GAY: Every day AGE: 21+ COVER: $2 / Members free Salt Lake’s newest club. MO & TH Karaoke. TU 50¢ drafts. FR, SA High NRG.

A COUPLE OF GUYS by Dave Brousseau

MoDiggity’s* 3424 S. State St. 832-9000 modiggitys.com HOURS: M–TH 4pm-12am F–SA 4pm-2am SU 11-2am GAY: Every day / AGE: 21+ COVER: $4/members free Sports & music club for women. Football & mimosa brunch Sundays.

Paper Moon* 3737 S. State / 713-0678 HOURS: M–F 3pm-1am SA 7pm-1am SU Noon-1am GAY: Every day / AGE: 21+ COVER: varies SL’s premier women’s club. TU Karaoke, WE 80¢ drafts. FR & SA hip hop/dance

Todd’s Bar & Grill* 1051 S 300 W / 328-8650 toddsbarandgrill.com HOURS: W 10am-2am GAY: Wednesday / AGE: 21+ COVER: No Gay Weds w/ DJ Ebenflow and Brent B. Free parking

Trapp*

Trapp Door* 102 S. 600 W. 533-0173 / trappdoor.com HOURS: 10am-2am daily GAY: Every day / AGE: 21+ COVER: $3/Members free New Ownership. Dance, show club. Hot men & hot music. SU Latin night.

W Lounge* 358 S W Temple 359-0637 HOURS: 9pm-2am daily GAY: n/a / AGE: 21+ COVER: varies Voted “Best Place to Meet Friendly Straight Folks” by readers of the Metro.

BITTER GIRL by Joan Hilty

MARCH 31, 2005 ■ SALT LAKE METRO ■ 25

102 S 600 W 531-8727 / thetrapp.com HOURS: 10am-2am daily GAY: Every day / AGE: 21+ COVER: $3/members free Really gay every day. SU Buffet, NFL, M & W Karaoke.


26

SALT LAKE METRO ■ MARCH 31, 2005


Service Guide

Classifieds MISSED ROOMMATES CONNECTIONS WANTED SAW YOU at the U of U YEARS ago; you told me I looked like your brother. Curious to know if you'd still think so. I believe you were studying pharmaceuticals. "GG" tattoo on chest.

FOR SALE AVENUES 4 bed, 2 bath, 2-story. New kitchen, walk to stores and restaurants. $268,500 Brad at Stonebrook Realty 550-0330.

FOR RENT DOWNTOWN, 335 E Broadway, Clean/Quiet, hrdwd, heat included, security, parking, 1bdrm 500.00/ Studio 400.00 322-2478 or www. oxfordplace.50megs.com WALK TO Starbucks & boutiques in upscale neighborhood. Spacious 3 bd, fml dining, hrdwd flrs, w/d hookups, private yard & garage. $1195 Call 581-0234 DONT RENT—BUY! All credit accepted, Connie 801-347-2956

AIRPORT/DOWNTOWN. Male to share large furnished home. No smoking, no pets. $350/month Call 631-8110

Share recently remodeled 3 bed, 2 bath house near downtown w/ 2 meticulous men. $260/month, utilities included. $260 deposit. No Pets/Smoking. Call 641-3362

HELP WANTED WANT TO START a new life in Phoenix, Arizona? Simgle male needed to share home rent free for helping in my software company, plus full-time job. E-mail me at azhomedog@yahoo.com DISPLAY AD SALES. Salt Lake Metro is seeking a full time display ad sales person. Previous sales is helpful but not required. Must be available to work full time. Call or email Steven for details at 323-9500 or steven@slmetro.com APPLE ONE Employment Services is seeking qualified call center experienced in sales. Can earn $12+/hr plus commission. Apply today. Employers, let us fill your staffing needs. Call Steven Whittaker at 4634828 for an appointment.

MISC. STUFF

ARE YOU HIV+? Pride Counseling is restarting a Therapy/Support Group for men who are HIV infected and seeking support from others in similar situations. Men who have participated in this group report a sense of connection and the permission to safely explore their uniqueness in a safe and affirming environment. We are able to bill most insurance companies, Ryan White and sliding fee scale available. For information please call Jerry Buie LCSW at 801-595-0666 TIRED OF THE BAR LIFE?

Pride Counseling is offering a Gay Men’s Therapy/Support Group. Gay men often find that their options to socialize limited to clubs and bars. This group seeks to bridge the gap of isolation and help gay men safely explore personal issues unique to their circumstances. Gay men regardless of “coming out” status, or life circumstance are welcome to this group. Most insurance companies billed, sliding fee scale. For information please call Jerry Buie LCSW at 801-595-0666.

ATTORNEYS

HOME REPAIR

MARLIN G. CRIDDLE, P.C. Serving Utah’s gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender communities. Estate Planning, Probate, Criminal Law, Bankruptcy, Corporations/Business. 474-2299. marlincriddle.com

HOMO IMPROVEMENT? Home repair and remodeling. Fast, friendly, professional service. No job too small. Kevin 815-4016

EMPLOYMENT SERVICES APPLE ONE Employment is seeking qualified people in many skills. Apply and begin your qualification today. Employers, let us fill your staffing needs. Call Steven Whittaker at 801-463-4828.

ESTATE PLANNING JANE MARQUARDT & DOUG FADEL Attorneys at Law, providing comprehensive estate planning services, custom designed to your unique family situation. Trusts, wills, partnership agreements, estate admin. 294-7777

HEALTH CARE

JEWELERS CUSTOM DESIGN JEWELRY. Relaxed atmosphere. All types of stone settings. Commitment rings, wedding rings, earrings, pendants. Repairs welcome. Charley Hafen Jewelers. Trolley Square. 521-7711

MASSAGE UNBELIEVABLE MASSAGE Athletic Male Therapists, #4405851 Contact 801641-4009 MASSAGE WORKS: 801-450-4144 LORRAINE, Convenient Location RELAX #109063

BEST THERAPISTS, best price, best place, best hours, call 486-5500 Pride Massage 1800 S. West Temple Ste A224 WWW.DENNISMASSAGE.COM A Man’s Man. 598-8344. “For Men” Model/Massage. LMT#98212332470

STIMULATE YOUR SENSES or feel deep peace with a relaxing full body massage. Call Therron at 879-3583 for $5 off mention this ad. LMT

GAY RM’S–SOCIAL group for return missionaries of the LDS Church. Regular parties and group activities more info. at www.gayRMs.com

#5608006

ROYAL COURT of the Golden Spike Empire. rcgse.org Membership meetings held twice monthly. Help support your community!

PET CARE HAPPY PAWS Pet Sitting Plus 205-4491 Libbie Neale. Pet sitting in your home for your pets’ comfort and peace of mind. Providing vital home care services while you are away.

RESOURCES AFFIRMATION: GAY and Lesbian Mormons. members.aol.com/wasatchweb/: Sunday meetings 534-8693 ENGENDERED SPECIES 801.320.0551. A social/support group resources for transgender people. www. engenderedspecies.com BI MEN of Utah groups. yahoo.com/group/Bi-GayMen-Utah. Social and support group for bi/gay men of Utah. UTAH GAY Rodeo Association ugra.net PO Box 511255 SLC, UT 84151-1255 A social & Rodeo Sport Organization

AMERICAN CIVIL Liberties Union. Fighting for individual freedoms since 1958. www. acluutah.org GAY MENS HEALTH SUMMIT. Gay men’s health is more than just HIV. visit us at utahgaymenshealth.com CODE PINK. A women-initiated peace and social justice movement by positive social change via creative protest and non-violent direct action. www.codepinkalert. com SAME-SEX MARRIAGE is a Feminist Issue: NOW’s mission is to promote equality for ALL women. NOW has fought for gay and lesbian rights, and we won’t stop until we achieve equality for all. Join us utahnow.org

FIRST NATIONAL Conference on Methamphetamine, HIV and Hepatitis: Science $ Reponses 2005 August 19th % 20th in Salt Lake City ~ Visit us www.harmredux.org

ADVERTISE in the Service Guide Classifieds for as little as $15 per issue! Call 323-9500 today or visit our website at slmetro. com.

EXTRAORDINARY SKIN CARE Chemical Free Skin Care Line with powerful ingredients that are clinically proven to nourish, revive, and refine. http://brian.whyskincare.com or brian@whyskincare.com

MARCH 31, 2005 ■ SALT LAKE METRO ■ 27


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SALT LAKE METRO ■ MARCH 31, 2005


Metro, Volume 2, Issue 07  

Utah's gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and ally magazine. April Fools Edition

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