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September 2 – 15 Volume 1 ■ Issue 10

GOP Bitterly Divided

Storrs: Anti-gay platform ‘shameful’

Matheson, Huntsman Disagree on 3 Neither support gay marriage

Sheriffs Call Off Search for Gay Man Missing boy scout tapped available resources

Walker Concerned About Amendment 3 Wanted amendment to go through proper channels

AberRant Massachusetts marriages make Mecham a manners maven

A&E A Letter to Harvey Milk opens

Sports Gay Olympians take five medals, give one finger

Sane Advice Is it cheating or chatting?











sacramento, calif. — Judge Loren McMasters heard arguments Aug. 24 on whether to uphold a 1999 California law giving same-sex couples nearly identical legal rights and responsibilities to married spouses. Lawyers for the suit’s plaintiffs said that the law should be thrown out because it violates the spirit of Proposition 22. Also known as the Knight Initiative, this 2000 voter-approved ballot measure said that California would only recognize the unions between a man and a woman as legally valid. Supporters of the measure, signed into law by then-Governor Gray Davis in 2003, told McMasters that the law said nothing about denying spousal benefits to gay and lesbian couples who have registered as domestic partners. “When the people vote on an initiative, they only get to vote on what’s in front of them, so you can’t say they were voting on domestic partnerships here,” said Deputy Attorney General Kathy Lynch. The Attorney General argued on behalf of California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger, who assumed Davis’ role as the case’s defendant upon his election. California became the first state to allow same-sex couples and unmarried opposite couples over age 62 to register as domestic

partners in 1999, and legal rights for domestic partners have been expanded over the last five years. Unless overturned, the law will go into effect January 1. — JV

Mass. High Court Rules Against Lesbian Child Support boston, mass. — A woman who split up with her lesbian partner before the birth of their child cannot be forced to pay child support, according to a Massachusetts Supreme Court ruling given August 25. The ruling involved two Hampshire County lesbians, identified in court documents as T.F. and B.L., who had lived together from 1996 to 2000. Initially, B.L. had not agreed with T.F.’s desire to have a child, but later changed her mind. After T.F. used artificial insemination to get pregnant, the couple broke up and T.F. sued B.L. for child support. Although Associate Justice Judith Cowin wrote that the women’s informal agreement to have a child together wasn’t an enforceable contract, three justices dissented, including Chief Justice Margaret Marshall, who penned the ruling legalizing same-sex marriages in the state. “The child may have been abandoned by the defendant, but he should not be abandoned by the court,” Justice John M. Greaney wrote in the dissent. — JV


Judge Hears Challenges to Calif. Domestic Partners Law

PrIdaho 2004 — PrIdaho emcee Walter! as Carol Channing hams it up with an overly-zealous spectator. PrIdaho drew several hundred participants to downtown Pocatello, Idaho for their fourth annual gay and lesbian pride day on August 21. Inset: pageant winners Mr. Gay Pride Mr. Mark, Ms. Gay Pride Amy, and sharing the Miss Gay Pride crown, Spike Naugahyde and Crystal Blue (left to right). The event culminated in the annual Fruit Float in Lava Hot Springs. More photos are at

Gay Marriage Issue Divides GOP by JoSelle Vanderhooft washington, d.c. — Some Republicans have criticized Vice President Dick Cheney for stating that he opposes a constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage, and have amended the national Republican platform to include an anti-gay marriage statement in response. “Lynne and I have a gay daughter, so it’s an issue our family is very familiar with,” Cheney said at an August 24 campaign rally in Iowa, which his lesbian daughter Mary attended. “With respect to the question of relationships, my general view is freedom means freedom for everyone. … People ought to be free to enter into any kind of relationship they want to.” Adding that the issue Vice President Dick Cheney of defining marriage was best left up to individual states to determine, Cheney also said Bush’s decision to back the Federal Marriage Amendment stemmed from judicial rulings that made gay marriage legal in certain states, such as Massachusetts. “I think his perception was that the courts, in effect, were beginning to change, without allowing the people to be involved,” he said. “The courts were making the judgment for the entire country.” Further, Cheney added that the President’s decision was the final say on the matter. “At this point, say, my own preference is as I’ve stated, but the president makes policy for the administration. He’s made it clear that he does, in fact, support a constitutional amendment on this issue.” Family Research Council President Tony Perkins criticized Cheney for his remarks: “I find it hard to believe the vice president would stray from the administration’s position on defense policy or tax policy. For many pro-family voters, protecting traditional marriage ranks ahead of the economy and job creation as a campaign issue.” Perkins also said Cheney’s statements made the Bush administration appear to be

“split on the issue” of gay marriage. Additionally, Gary L. Bauer, president of the neoconservative group American Values, said that Cheney’s words ran “the risk of demoralizing the very people the president and vice president desperately need to be reelected.” Mere hours after Cheney’s statement, Republican delegates voted to include support for the Federal Marriage Amendment at the outset of their two-day long platform hearings — a position Perkins and Bauer said their groups helped write. The “protecting marriage” plank, which garnered little debate in the 110 member platform committee, condemns “a few judges and local authorities” for attempting to alter civilization’s “most fundamental institution.” It also said that same-sex couples should not have legal benefits that married straight couples receive, and urges the U.S. Senate to vote to strip federal courts the power to overturn state laws forbidding same-sex marriage. The House of Representatives voted overwhelmingly to do so in July. Although party platforms are non-binding to the point that several candidates ignore them, some moderate Republicans have said their party was alienating swing voters. Additionally, gay and lesbian Republicans have expressed outrage at the plank’s inclusion, with Log Cabin Republicans spokesman Christopher Barron calling it “mean spirited” and “a slap in the face to fair-minded Republicans.” Likewise, Utah Log Cabin Republicans President Gordon Storrs said that while he found it “helpful for [Cheney] to vocalize his perspective when politically it is probably difficult for him,” the creation of the “protecting marriage” plank made him “very disappointed.” “That focus on a place at the table for every American is seriously eroded by the installation of a plank in the party platform that divides us against each other and perpetuates an untenable position contrary to traditional Republican Philosophy,” he said. Further, the plank “creates a scenario that encourages people to treat gay people as if they were somehow less important than all of the others. “It is shameful that my party would take this position,” Storrs added.


Marquardt, Wardle Face off at Amendment 3 Debate Wardle: Don’t Amend Alliance’s ‘Scare Tactics’ Legally Baseless by Mandy Q. Racer

Walker Expresses Concern over Amendment 3 by Michael Aaron In her monthly KUED news conference, Utah Governor Olene Walker expressed some reservation towards Amendment 3,

Utah Governor Olene Walker

Editor Brandon Burt Events Editor Greg Harrison Sports Editor David Nelson Contributing Writers Scott Abbott, Brandie Balken, Lee Beckstead, Xenia Cherkaev, Janice Eberhardt, Jace Garfield, Beau Jarvis, Lynette Malmstrom, Laurie Mecham, LaDonna Moore, Rob Orton, William T. Park, Scott Perry, Nicholas Rupp, Mandy Q. Racer, Ruby Ridge, Joel Shoemaker, Jim Struve, Darren Tucker, JoSelle Vanderhooft, Ben Williams Photographers Lucy Juarez, William H. Munk, Shauna Sanchez Proofreader Nicholas Rupp Art Director Michael Aaron Graphic Designer Kris Kramer Marketing and Public Relations Director Chad Keller Sales Director and Office Manager Steven Peterson Sales Executives 801-323-9500 | 877-870-0727 Sebastian Cruz | Bob Tubbs | Distribution Steven Peterson Courtney Moser, Northern Utah Copyright © 2004 Salt Lake Metro.

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which would alter the Utah State Constitution to ban gay marriage as well as any other arrangements providing similar legal rights, such as domestic partnerships. “From studying constitutional law and the Constitution, I believe that the constitutions are best that give simple principles and the specifics are left to statutes. I would prefer a simpler approach,” Walker said. Walker was also concerned about potential litigation should the amendment pass. “You have to look at that and understand there probably will be fallout. There probably will be a lot of legal issues,” she said. She stated she would have preferred the proposed amendment go through the legislature’s constitutional revision commission.


Walker skirted a question of whether she supports Attorney General Mark Shurtleff’s position that the second part of the amendment would be difficult to administer and enforce, saying, “I will leave that up to him and his interpretation because he is the one in state government that analyzes the law and he’s in a perfect position to make that interpretation.” The governor noted that her office is not included in the constitutional amendment process: “Ironically, constitutional amendments are not passed by my desk. They are passed by two-thirds majority in the state legislature and then go directly to the people. So I urge citizens to study and analyze [the bill’s language] and make their decision.” The governor is known for her moderate stand on social issues, which may be partially to blame for her ouster from the ballot at the Utah State Republican Convention in June. During the legislative session in February, Walker questioned the need for a new definition of marriage. “We already have a definition of a traditional marriage … we have a law on the books,” Walker said. “I want some legal interpretations of what [Senate Bill 24, sponsored by Sen. Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan] does to the law.” She signed the bill, which defined marriage as “a contract between a man and a woman” in March. Asked at this month’s news conference if she personally would vote for the Amendment 3, she stated, “I will have to make those same, weighty decisions, because I believe in the definition of marriage as between a man and a woman. Does that outweigh, maybe, the second part that has some more complex issues? Like every other citizen, when I go to vote in November, I’m going to have to analyze those two aspects and make a decision.” Pressed for an answer, she stated, “I’ll make that decision when I get to the voting booth.”

Publisher Michael Aaron


The Family Fellowship, a support group that consists predominantly of Mormon parents of lesbians and gays, hosted a debate Aug. 29 on Amendment 3. Attorneys Jane Marquardt and Lynn Wardle discussed the proposed amendment’s pros and cons. Marquardt practices estate planning. Wardle is a professor of law at Brigham Young University. The language of Amendment 3 is separated in two parts. Part one reads: “Marriage consists only of the legal union between a man and a woman.” The debate focused on part two: “No other domestic union, however denominated, may be recognized as a marriage or given the same or substantially equivalent legal effect.” Amendment 3, Wardle said, was designed to protect marriage both formally and legally. “Formally” pertains to the definition of marriage, one Wardle asserts should remain as one man and one woman. “Legally” pertains to what Wardle called the package of benefits bestowed on a legally married couple. Wardle said that the proposed amendment is not intended to stop the extension of particular benefits, but instead, the granting of “the entire package” to gay and lesbian couples. Citing California’s passage of Proposition 22, which restricted marriage to that between one man and one woman, Wardle warned of what might happen if Amendment 3 did not contain part two. Since Proposition 22 did not bar same-sex couples from being granted the same or similar rights as those granted by marriage, the benefits of marriage were given to gay and lesbian couples in domestic partnerships. “You need to protect both the form and the substance,” Wardle said. Wardle stressed that Amendment 3 wouldn’t stop the legislature from creating alternatives to marriage for gay and lesbian couples — only that those alternatives could not be “the same or equal” to the benefits granted to heterosexual married couples. Marquardt countered that the amendment would indeed prohibit Utah’s legislature from granting any rights to gay and lesbian couples similar to those granted in marriage. In addition, it would put rights currently granted to domestic partners at risk. According to Marquardt, Nebraska passed language similar to that in part two of Amendment 3. About one year after the passage, a bill was presented to the legislature that would grant domestic partners a handful of the rights granted to married couples. Nebraska’s attorney general said that the bill couldn’t even be introduced, much less passed. “That is exactly what will happen in this state,” she said. Gail Turpin, who attended the forum with her husband, stepdaughter and her stepdaughter’s partner, stood and spoke through tears. “I didn’t have to be black to support black civil rights and I don’t have

to be gay to support gay civil rights,” she said. “I don’t understand what this amendment is all about. I don’t understand what it all means. This is an emotional point of view, not a legal point of view. It makes me incredibly sad.” Wardle said that Turpin’s fear is a direct result of the actions taken by Amendment 3’s opponents. He used the Don’t Amend Alliance’s website as an example of “what I consider to be scare tactics.” Wardle further classified the Alliance’s list of “Legal Implications” of Amendment 3 as “a parade of horribles to scare people.” He said that the claims are “facetious” and that there is “no coherent legal argument” to support these assertions. At this, Marquardt turned

to Wardle and informed him that she authored many of the arguments listed on the website. Marquardt and Wardle both agree that the proposed amendment should have passed through the legislature’s constitutional revision commission for much needed clarification. According to Scott McCoy of the Alliance, a stop at the commission is not required, but “nearly every amendment of any substance goes through the process.” According to McCoy, Amendment 3 was on the commission’s Feb. 3 agenda, but when Rep. LaVar Christensen, the amendment’s sponsor, failed to show up, the commission did not review it. Marquardt said, “Why pass it at all until we’ve first had the discussion?” At the debate’s close, Wardle said, “This amendment doesn’t take away anything.” Attendee Clay Essig rose in disagreement, and said that it took away his right to marry. “You don’t have a right to marry, my friend,” Wardle said. Wardle stated that he is not a spokesman for BYU or for the Mormon Church.


Matheson, Huntsman Square off Over Amendment 3 by Darren Tucker

Utah’s Republican and Democratic candidates for governor are divided on the issue of an anti-same-sex marriage amendment to the state’s constitution. Democrat Scott Matheson Jr. opposes the amendment but supports traditional marriage, whereas Republican Jon Huntsman Jr. supports the amendment. Current Governor Olene Walker recently expressed concerns about the amendment in her monthly KUED Television press conference saying the measure would “muddy the state’s constitution.” Huntsman’s published statement makes very clear his intention to vote for the amendment, and to “vigorously defend” the measure if he is elected Governor. “I believe in the sanctity of marriage, and I believe in the tradition definition of marriage as between one man and one woman,” reads the statement. “I strongly support a constitutional amendment

preserving this definition of traditional marriage.” The statement also includes language supporting “reciprocal beneficiary” legislation which would give “two people with mutual economic interests rights and privileges, such as visitation rights, medical decision making, etc.” Scott McCoy, head of the Don’t Amend Alliance, says Huntsman’s statement on the amendment is “flat out bizarre.” “On one hand he would support an amendment banning same sex marriages, but on the other hand he supports legislation granting reciprocal rights.” McCoy said. “You can’t have it both ways.” McCoy said the second part of the amendment defining marriage would specifically ban any legislation granting those rights. “Every credible legal scholar who has studied this amendment has said part two would prevent the legislature from

The three candidates for Attorney General have issued a joint statement opposing the amendment [“Attorney General Candidates Oppose Amendment 3,” Aug. 19, JoSelle Vanderhooft]. McCoy said he hopes “Huntsman is receiving some very bad legal advice.” “I would hope a man as honorable as Jon Huntsman would not deliberately Gubernatorial candidates Scott Matheson, Jr. and Jon Huntsman mislead Utah voters into voting for the amendment.” doing exactly what Huntsman says he Huntsman’s statement says if this supports,” McCoy said. amendment does not pass, he would Matheson is one of the “credible legal work as governor to promote a new scholars” who have researched the issue, amendment. according to McCoy. He points out that McCoy says there is no way to look Matheson teaches Constitutional Law into the future and predict what the legand is Dean of the University of Utah’s islature may do if this amendment fails. law school. “We’re focused on this amendment,” Matheson has issued no such statehe explained. “If they came back with ment on his website, but has publicly an amendment that was just part one, stated he opposes the amendment. it would obviously be a much tougher “To clarify Matheson’s position, he fight. But what we are faced with right is in favor of traditional marriage and now is a hurtful amendment that would supports current laws banning same-sex deny basic rights to Utah residents.” marriage,” says McCoy. “But he opposes As of press time, neither candidate this amendment for the same reason the had returned calls from Salt Lake Metro candidates for attorney general do: Part requesting interviews on the issue. two contains some serious flaws.”

Sheriffs Call off Search for Missing Salt Lake Leatherman Bruce Smith Believed Suicidal by Partner Stan DeClue; Ten-Deputy Search Team Unsuccessful




by Brandon Burt

summit county — Police called off their search Aug. 29 for a Salt Lake City man who had gone missing five days earlier near the Yellow Pine camping area in the Uinta Mountains. Bruce Smith, 44, was reported missing by his partner of 21 years, Stan DeClue. According to DeClue, Smith suffered from bipolar affective disorder, and was released Aug. 6 from the University Hospital psychiatric ward where he had been committed for problems related to severe depression. Smith may have driven up to the camping area near Kamas to end his own life. “He had attempted suicide before,” DeClue said. “Wednesday morning I got up and he still wasn’t home, and I knew what had happened: I knew he took off and attempted suicide because his depression was just eating him up.” Depression had tormented Smith for years, said DeClue: “He’d just wake up at night fighting something in his mind, and I didn’t know how to comfort him.” On Aug. 25, a day after Smith failed to return to the couple’s home south of Liberty Park, DeClue drove to the Uintas to look for him. “I went right up to our campsite hoping I would find him there,” he said. The site was a favorite of Smith’s, and was the place where the couple scattered the ashes of their pet dog, which died in June. “It’s the first campsite past Kamas on the Mirror Lake Highway.”

DeClue found Smith’s vehicle parked at the campsite, but Smith was nowhere nearby. The Summit County Sheriff’s Office began searching for Smith Wednesday afternoon, but the five-day search was unsuccessful. An unrelated search for Garrett Bardsley, a 12 year-old boy scout who went missing on a camping trip Aug. 20, stretched Summit County’s resources. “Everybody else was up looking for the little boy who was missing, and they couldn’t spare very many deputies,” said DeClue. “I don’t think there were more than 10 of them at any one time.” By contrast, at the height of the search for the boy scout, an estimated 500 deputies and volunteers participated. Officials called off both searches on the same day. Even while conducting two simultaneous searches, the sheriff’s office was “excellent, wonderful” during the search, said DeClue. “Sunday they had deputies on horseback, and even their wives came” to help search. “I kept breaking down in front of them. I told them, ‘Well, I’ve got to get this out in the open: By now you know I’m gay,’” said DeClue. “They said, ‘It’s somebody we have to find. We understand what you’re going through.’ They were really, really nice.” DeClue is convinced that Smith committed suicide. “His remains are out there somewhere,” he said, adding that he will continue efforts to recover his partner’s remains even though officials have called off the search. “He wanted to be cremated,”

Bruce Smith

said DeClue. “Until I can find some part of his earthly remains to carry out his last wish, I’ll keep looking.” DeClue and Smith have been active in Salt Lake City’s gay community for more than two decades. DeClue and Smith were early members of the Wasatch Leathermen Motorcycle Club, which disbanded in 1999. Anybody with information regarding the whereabouts of Bruce Smith may contact Stan DeClue at 486-7079, or the Summit County Sheriff ’s Office at (435) 615-3600.

Resources Dry up for HIV/AIDS Patients Ryan White Program Struggles Under Bush Budget Cuts by Rob Orton

month on drug costs alone. In February this year, an Early Treatment for HIV Act (ETHA) was introduced in the U.S. House of Representatives by Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi, D-Calif, Rep. James Leach, R-Iowa, and 68 other members of Congress. ETHA provides states with incentives to enroll HIV-positive individuals in Medicaid before they are diagnosed with AIDS — reducing the strain on drug assistance programs. This is not the first time this has come to legislators. According to David Ferguson, program director of the Utah AIDS Foundation, similar legislation has been proposed twice before. Ferguson notes that other states have already changed the structure of their

Medicare requirements to allow services to anyone who is HIV-positive. “The lack of response by our legislators marks their philosophy and is making healthcare a luxury. The poorest are becoming the sickest because of inaccessibility to healthcare,” he said. People who are asymptomatic with HIV or are not disabled are generally not eligible for Medicare or Medicaid. “Individuals have to advocate for themselves to find benefits,” said Ferguson, “but if you are a person who is already not feeling well, these systems can be very defeating.” Medicare is the second largest source of funding for HIV/AIDS care after Medicaid. But according to Gay Men’s Health Crisis, plans under Medicaid and Medicare do not

HIV Education Lacking in Utah Schools by Rob Orton

“I’ll make that decision when I get to the voting booth.” —Governor Olene Walker on how she will personally vote on Amendment 3.

“Bush is filled with hate and is trying to bring hatred into the Constitution.” —New York Parents and Friends of Gays and Lesbians president Jerry Goodman before a march protesting the Republican National Convention in New York City.

“I just can’t stomach this — the thought of those girls being raised in that kind of setting.” —Mormon activist Sheri Dew commenting on a March Newsweek photograph showing a gay couple and their children. Dew gave the invocation at the Republican National Convention on Monday, August 30.

“You mean to tell me all you have to say is sorry … sorry that I lived all that time believing I was going to die?” —Jim Malone to his doctor after being told that his HIVpositive diagnosis eight years ago was incorrect.

“My general view is freedom means freedom for everyone.” —Vice President Dick Cheney after being asked his stance on same-sex marriage. Cheney’s daughter, Mary, is a lesbian.

“Our country right now needs to fight terrorists, not pry into people’s private lives.” —C. Dixon Osburn, executive director of Servicemembers Legal Defense Network after the nation’s highest military court declined to strike down the armed forces’ ban on consensual sodomy.


When the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (GLSEN) issued its “2004 State of the States” report, Utah received a failing grade, ranking near the bottom of the list of states that provide a safe place for queer students to learn [“Utah Fails to Provide Safe Schools,” July 8, Rob Orton]. However, that was only half the story. According to the report, educators here are also unwilling — or prevented from — addressing curricular issues that could save gay and lesbian students’ lives. “Human sexuality” is one of the issues assessed by the GLSEN in grading Utah’s safe school policies. While Utah educators cannot advocate or educate the use of contraception or homosexuality, this is nothing new in our country. Most states require abstinence-only instruction and receive funding for it under the Planned Parenthood Act. Most states do not provide information or advocacy of contraception, let alone contraceptive devices themselves. According to a report in the Boston Phoenix, “Federal programs sponsored by the Christian Right Campaign are causing teens to learn less about AIDS and sexually transmitted infections (STIs) than they were a decade ago. And they’re still having lots of sex.” The Advocates for Youth, a national statistics and trends resource, reports the United States has one of the highest rates of STIs among adolescents in the developed world. Centers for Disease Control reports 51 percent of new HIV infections are among people under the age of 25, and 25 percent of new HIV infections are contracted during the adolescent years. “With STIs, the stakes are just too high to talk only about abstinence,” said James Wagoner, president of Advocates for Youth. “Over 27 million people between the ages of 15 and 24 have had sex, and they need all the facts — including medically accurate information


on condoms — to protect their health.” Early in the 1900s, typhoid fever was at epidemic levels. It took the education system to educate young people the importance of personal hygiene and the ramifications of ignoring it to ameliorate this public health crisis. “Educators have a responsibility outside of parental values. We’re going to make parents mad about many things,” said Olsen. “This is an ‘open door’ system designed to have input from the community at large.” According to Mark Peterson, public relations director for the Utah State Board of Education, “The administrative rules which we deal with don’t have to go through the legislature. School policies by legislative mandate have to have input from school district employees, teachers, students, parents, as well as community members. So as districts are putting policies together, they certainly follow the democratic process to get that input from everyone in the community.” The fact that topics are not as thorough as the national community would like, and that they enable parental “opt-outs” for sexual education, shows a lack of responsibility to prepare youth for healthy interactions in society by Advocates for Youth. According to state board attorney Jean Hill, educators’ hands are tied: “Educators agree: The law is limiting. There’s no question about that. In order to change this, we have to go to the legislature and get the laws changed. We also need to do more training with the educators.” A public comment period is provided in every school district board meeting where community members can come and make their comments and concerns known. This is where policies that encapsulate race, gender, and disability have made way into the education code. Concerned community members can contact the local school district to get a schedule of board meetings and are encouraged by officials to attend. As Olsen states, “It is very important that these discussions continue.”

Notable Quotes


According to the Utah Department of Health (UDOH), there are more people than ever before living with HIV/AIDS — and those who depend on public assistance are being turned away, as federal budget cuts take their toll. While President Bush requested a $25 million increase for the federal Ryan White Title II AIDS Drug Assistance Program (ADAP) for the current fiscal year, there was no concurrent increase in funding for other Comprehensive AIDS Resources Emergency (CARE) Act programs. Locally, this means that newly diagnosed people will have more challenges getting assistance under certain federal programs. UDOH reports there are currently 1,803 people living with HIV / AIDS in Utah. 750 of these qualify for benefits under Title II. As a result of the level in funding and increases in medication costs, UDOH has announced that they will no longer take any new applicants for Ryan White Title II benefits. Fourteen other states have had to institute similar containment strategies, and 10 more will follow by the end of this year. The decision to limit new enrollment in Title II programs is a recommendation by the national ADAP Advisory Committee to ensure treatment of currently enrolled individuals. A report by the National Alliance of State and Territorial AIDS Directors (NASTAD) states that the medical benefits and support services provided by Title II not only improve quality and length of life for people living with HIV/AIDS, but by delaying the progression from HIV to AIDS, the overall cost of treatment is reduced. AIDS is the advanced and often more chronic condition of an HIV-infected person. Persons who are diagnosed with HIV undergo rigorous drug therapies the keep the viral count in check with the objective of preventing or slowing the progression to AIDS. Research in 2002 by the University of Alabama at Birmingham showed that the yearly expense for treatment averages $34,000 for people in the advanced stages of AIDS compared with $14,000 for those who are taking drug therapies to keep the virus controlled. The Title II Act provides grants to all 50 states for comprehensive AIDS services for all individuals with HIV: home care services, health insurance continuation programs, community-based services, and the AIDS Drug Assistance Program. Other Title II provisions include dental, nutrition, mental health, substance abuse, food vouchers, and legal services. There is no state funding in Utah for HIV/AIDS treatment apart from Medicaid and Medicare. According to UDOH, less than $100,000 of the total HIV/AIDS treatment budget comes from the state — and that is directly associated with administrative salaries. Theresa Garret, director of the state Bureau of Communicable Disease Control, says that it is not uncommon for the costs of prescription medication for people with HIV/AIDS to increase 200-400 percent in less than a year’s time. Even with drug assistance programs, some clients will spend $1,500 or more per

cover all the drugs needed by HIV individuals. They also lack choices that physicians need to prescribe comprehensive drug therapies. UDOH estimates that as much as $800,000 is needed just to maintain services at the current level. While options are being explored to secure additional funding, existing clients will continue to receive services. Garret concedes that despite the budget limitations, there is still a very strong support from UDOH administration.





Blood and Ganja For many people whose only exposure to Reggae music has been Legend: the Best of Bob Marley and the Wailers, it may come as something of a surprise that the genre includes more than songs about love mixed with revolutionary paeans to liberation. It may be a superficial reading of Marley that concludes he was a peacenik, but it is still possible to listen to the island strains of “One Love/One Heart” and feel he has something positive to offer the world. By contrast, a new generation of Reggae artists with names like Beenie Man and Buju Banton wax poetic about murdering gays. This sort of thing may go over well in places like Kingston, Jamaica. However, once Beenie and Buju stepped off the island, it wasn’t surprising when their murderous lyrics inspired outrage among people in more modern and enlightened places. Unfortunately, these enlightened places don’t include EMI/Virgin Records, which continues to promote and to sell Beenie Man’s tropical blend of religion, ganja, and homophobia. When activist groups managed to decode Beenie Man’s curious dialect — in which, for instance, “chi-chi man” and “batty boy” are derogatory slang terms for gay men — they protested that Beenie’s lyrics included such poetic gems as “I’m dreaming of a new Jamaica, come execute all the gays” and “queers must be killed” as well as other statements advocating shooting, hanging, pouring acid on, and setting fire to gay men. The record distribution giant responded by slapping Beenie on the wrist and issuing this statement, supposedly from Beenie himself: “It has come to my attention that certain lyrics and recordings I have made in

the past may have caused distress and outrage among people whose identities and lifestyles are different from my own. While my lyrics are very personal, I do not write them with the intent of purposefully hurting or maligning others, and I offer my sincerest apologies to those who might have been offended, threatened or hurt by my songs. As a human being, I renounce violence towards other human beings in every way, and pledge henceforth to uphold these values as I move forward in my career as an artist.” It was an uplifting and strangely eloquent statement, particularly when contrasted against Beenie’s normal mode of speech. Still, when asked about the matter, Beenie replied that he didn’t understand what the controversy was all about, since homophobia is such an integral part of Caribbean culture, but that he was amused by all the fuss. After the corporate apology was made, Beenie continued including the homophobic lyrics in his concert song lists until pressure from activist groups forced his promoters to drop him from their events. More power to them. Now if only EMI/Virgin could be convinced to do the same. Regardless of how many apologies the company issues in its artists’ names, by continuing to promote murder music, they not only help promote violence against gays and lesbians, but are actively profiting from the blood of countless victims of that anti-gay violence. EMI/Virgin should revoke Beenie Man’s contract, or face a boycott by those of us who censure violence in all its forms.

From the Editor Deerhunter Provided Cherished Memories by Brandon Burt By the time I started sneaking into bars, the Deerhunter was already an institution in Salt Lake’s gay community. Back in those days it was the closest thing we had to a Levi/leather club. At age 19 I would present my fake I.D. — which, to tell the truth, was as convincing as the GOP’s recent pretense at inclusiveness — and somehow the doorman would let me in. Most nights, having successfully negotiated the tight squeeze up to the bar, I would be greeted by a handsome, jovial, bearded man. I’d plonk down my dough for a dollar draft and, as he gave me my change, Steve Baxter would briskly tap the bar twice — a friendly, trademark gesture — and say, “Thanks, buddy!” I don’t think he ever learned my name. But it was enough for me, at that tender age, to be his “buddy.” Eventually I turned 21, and, as it turned out, half of Salt Lake’s gay male community was Steve’s buddy. But somehow he always made each of his customers feel special, and whatever profits he made — on the narrow margin that any bar business earns — he invested back into the business. City Cab dispatchers, with cynical wit, would call it “Bambi’s.” It had a reputation for attracting a somewhat more butch clientele than many straight people were willing to associate with a gay bar in those days. To begin with, it was a quirky and somewhat cramped place — just a bar and a tight spot with a pool table — but Steve kept expanding and adding onto it. The game room was notorious, but then a front bar was opened, and with it enough space for multiple pool tables. Tournaments started up. The summer the patio appeared, with its quaking aspen and ponderosa pine, was glorious. The Wasatch Leathermen Motorcycle Club adopted it as their home bar, and would regularly hold fundraising beer busts. Steve himself would offer weekly two-for-one specials, and in odd compliance with DABC regulations, would present customers with a “wooden nickel” — a pine slug exchangeable for a draft beer — with each purchase. Only last week I was going through a box and came across a few of those beer tokens. One of my fondest memories was the night I was blindfolded, handcuffed, and carried bodily out of the Deerhunter by the WLMC. My pledge period was finally over and it was time for the big initiation. When I, along with the rest of my new club brothers, returned, I was a changed person. Suddenly, I was part of something larger than myself — something that often freaked out a lot of other people. In some ways that was the best part — the shock value — but, no matter how far we went with our raucous, somewhat perverse fun, Steve always made us feel our presence was valued. In some ways we were the floorshow, and on the bright side, nobody ever lost an eye. For many of the Deerhunter’s customers, the beginning of the end came with the addition of the dance floor. A friend of mine, John Martin, mainly objected to the inclusion of a Confederate flag along with all the other banners hanging from the ceiling. (After complaints were met with little response, John’s plan to get rid of the flag was to bring a bullhorn and begin to agitate the crowd against racism. During the ensuing brouhaha, another friend would just “happen by” carrying a gas can. John would run into the bar, tear down the flag, grab the gas can and engage in an “impromptu” flag burning. For better or worse, this bit of street theater never actually took place.) For the rest of us, however, the dance floor simply changed the dynamic of the bar. It brought with it a flood of people we would derisively refer to as “the Sun crowd” — twinks, sweater queens. I’m pretty sure now they were not much different from the rest of us, but at the time it marked a distinct change in the Deerhunter’s clientele. After the Sun blew down during a freak tornado, the change was complete — the Deerhunter would never be the same. Later, the Deerhunter itself burned down and Club Blue was closed by the DABC Gestapo. It was a bad period for gay clubs in Salt Lake City. There’s more to life than going to the bar, of course. But Steve Baxter provided a comfortable, friendly place for us to meet, and without him, Salt Lake’s gay community wouldn’t have been the same. And for that, all I can say is, “Thanks, buddy.”


Cops Have Carte Blanche Editor: Something has been weighing on me for a while now, so I decided to make it something of a request to see if I can find some peace. It has to do with the Public Safety GLBT Liaison Committee. Can Salt Lake Metro please do a story that talks about what the committee is, where it came from, and how it is having an impact on us — both positively and negatively? I’ve done a bit of research, and can find virtually nothing about who they are and how they came into “power.” The story in this recent issue raised more questions for me than it answered [“PSLC to Hold Workshop Series,” Aug. 19, Rob Orton]. Who are they? (And I mean names. If they aren’t willing to let the community know their names, they shouldn’t be in a position to represent our interests. What community groups do they represent, if any? Are they appointed by someone? Are they accountable to anyone? Whom do they answer to if they do bad things — and I believe some of the things they do are bad. For example, are they the assholes who gave KUTV News carte blanche to do that outrageous story “Sex on Your Street” in March? Are they self-selected? Are they hand picked by the police departments? Don’t people see the incredible conflict of interest in that?

Workshops about domestic violence and self defense are all well and good, but it seems to me a group like this does more harm than good by giving aggressive and hostile law enforcement the justification it needs to target the “undesirable” element. I think it’s outrageous that they hold up the closing of Club Blue as a positive police/community interaction. Were they behind the SportsMallMetro targeting specific men as gay and therefore automatically suspected of sex in the steam room? The cops can close any club they want, entrap as many men as they want, and be as cruel as they want, as long as they have some naive community group standing behind them.

Name withheld at author’s request

Gays on Ice Editor: Thanks for carrying the piece on “OneVoice: a Cabaret on Ice” in San Francisco. I’m Thom Mullins, the producer of the event and director of Skate Out, the Bay Area’s skating team for Gay Games. I assume David Nelson’s reporting was tongue-in-cheek and served up in a light-hearted, well-meaning spirit. After all, we can take a joke … we know figure skating has a reputation among many for being a “gay sport.” So the idea that boas and feathers, etc. are not allowed seems ironic, especially when it comes from gay organizers. Yes, our entry form encourages skaters to be as openly gay as they like. On the flip side, feathers, boas or anything that could

leave debris on the ice are not allowed in most skating competitions and events because they actually do create a hazard and could trip up the next skater. While this all has a seemingly funny side, it also has a well-intended side. Through sport and entertainment, we’re trying to create an event that brings people together to laugh and cheer and in the end, gain more respect for one another. Skate Out is creating dialogue between all communities, straight and gay. So when we create an inclusive event, we hope that all skaters — gay and straight — will take an interest. So, yes, we do let skaters signing up know that we’re positioning the event as “gay” and marketing it to the “gay community.” If that is a problem for the skater, fine. At least they won’t feel like they’ve been “outed” simply by participating. Bottom line: We’ve created an event that showcases gay skaters alongside straight skaters, free to be openly gay without fear or bias. Glad we gave you a chuckle, but maybe we can step beyond stereotypes and consider how an event that reaches out to all communities better serves our own community. Let me know when we can organize an event like this in Salt Lake City.

town to go read whatever and they say only the cover story is new. I don’t think this is the first issue like that. Is your web guy on vacation?

Amy Heinetz Salt Lake City You are right — we were a bit late getting the last issue’s articles online. We appreciate hearing that people are reading the paper on the internet and will make sure to prioritize that in the future. — Editor

Letters to the Editor Salt Lake Metro welcomes letters from our readers. Rants, gushes, thoughtful diatribes, pats on the backs, incredulous expressions, rabble-rousing raves and maudlin sob stories are all welcome! Write us at: Metro Publishing, Inc. 352 S. Denver Street, Suite 350 Salt Lake City, UT 84111 or email

Thom Mullins

or fax 801-323-9986

San Francisco, CA

Salt Lake Metro reserves the right to edit for clarity and brevity. Letters under 300 words are given preference. True, full name, address and phone number must be included for verification purposes.

Web Woes Editor: Love the paper, and you’re doing such a good job being on time — except for putting the articles online! I keep telling my friends who are out of












AberRant Again, you can use the traditional format:

Wedding Belles

_____ will be pleased to attend the reception.

by Laurie Mecham Say you want to get married. On purpose. Well, I hope it lasts. No, I’m not worried about you — I’m worried about the legislative jihad being waged by Jesustold-me-to-hate-you, nervous, twitchy, white folks who don’t want there to be any gays except in certain restrooms and out of town and in the porn that’s locked up in the ammo box in the top of the closet. When two gay people in Utah want to go to, say, Massachusetts so that they can be legally married, what questions should they ask? What preparations should they make? There are numerous resources on the legal steps that a couple needs to take. But there are other serious considerations that should be made, and I thought I’d address them for you here. I’m not talking about compatibility; I’m talking about style and form. Here, then, is Laurie Mecham’s Guide to Gay Wedding Etiquette.

ANNOUNCEMENTS Should you send announcements? Absolutely! Remember, the personal is political, and what more beautiful way to enshrine your love than to stick it in the craw of all the right-wing homophobes in the “Friends and Family” section of your address book? Some couples may take this as an opportunity to make a statement of principal, such as:

Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald were legally married on September 1, 2004, so get used to it. I am a fan of the more traditional format. You may need to tweak it just a bit to fit your needs. For example:

John Doe and Jane Doe are ashamed and dismayed to reveal the marriage of their son/daughter Ruby Ridge to Blanche Davidian, love child of G.W.B. and R.B.C.




For your guest’s convenience and the purpose of planning, include an RSVP card.

Or you can modify the response card to fit your theme or circumstances, as a gay couple I know did: 


(Check one): What a brilliant way to disrupt the patriarchal, heterosexist paradigm. We will be there in solidarity for the movement. If it will make you happy, we affirm your choice without judgment and will attend. We find this fad alarming. We must decline, and hope that you will reconsider your choice. We refuse to participate in the further destruction of America’s Christian values, including normal marriage. The next time we see you will be in hell.

CEREMONY AND VOWS This is a potentially sticky one for samesex couples. Unless you have a certain fetish, most couples will start by striking out any clause using the word “obey.” Exchanging vows offers a chance to articulate precisely what it is that you are committing to. This can include special rituals, such as, “I promise to rub your back when it aches,” countered by, “I promise to make the morning coffee.” Remember, this is not the place to bicker. No “I promise to put the dishes away but only if you at least leave then in the goddamn sink!” Many couples like to write their own vows. This can be genuinely lovely for the couple and for their friends. More often, it can be a hellish, interminable nightmare of bad poetry and tacky expressions. Remember, less is always more. Another potential pitfall is that the expression of vows becomes a contest. Both parties are thinking, “Oh, no! He is going to say something beautiful. Now I have to come up with six pages of everything wonderful about him just to keep up!” You may wish to stick to vows that are more traditional and generic, with the usual “for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others,” etc. (Note: Be sure to rehearse the “forsaking all others” part. The actual ceremony is no time to discover that you have differing views on an open relationship.) 801.268.6487

A monthly magazine for lesbians and their friends in Utah and beyond! Womyn 4 Women is a localized and empowering publication written from a lesbian perspective for women of all sexual identities. W4W’s articles cover: • women’s stories • art • travel • relationships • community events and many other timely issues. Please help this unique publication grow by advertising in and subscribing to W4W. W One-year subscriptions are only: $25 - 12 printed issues, each one mailed in a discreet envelope $12 - 12 downloadable issues (PDFs) sent each month to your e-mail address You can subscribe on our web site and also check out our reasonable advertising rates. Or send a check or money order to W4W, P.O. Box 575708, Salt Lake City, UT 84157-5708.

No matter what color you choose to wear, from virginal white to heathen red, everyone still knows what a slut you are. Just kidding. As the song says, “It doesn’t matter what you wear, just as long as you are there.” So listen to your Inner Bride and let her have her day!

THE RECEPTION Everyone loves a beautifully decorated venue with an eclectic, thoughtful selection of music and some lovely Spanish tapas. However, the key to a successful reception really lies in these two words: “open bar.”

REGISTERING FOR GIFTS Since you are a non-traditional couple, is it reasonable to expect to participate in the traditional wedding gift registry? To quote Emily Post, you bet your ass it is! How many times have you coughed up $25 for the kid of someone in the ward? You say you haven’t been invited to many weddings? You wonder if it’s your personality, your breath, your daring fashion statements? Believe me, it’s probably none of the above. It’s just that your friends are all gay. Anyhoo, whether or not you have made the standard trek to Bed Bath and Beyond or Target, printed out the incredibly lengthy and detailed registry only to select the first thing that falls in your price range (what could make a lovelier gift than two hand towels and a spoon?) you still deserve the full range of whatever benefits you can get. Believe me, darling. You won’t be getting any love from the State of Utah. How many of us have fantasized about registering at ZCMI? Oh, if only that venerable institution had hung on until the present day, what fun we would have had with the lilac-haired ladies in the bridal registry! At any rate, you can register almost anywhere you want, from Home Depot to Williams-Sonoma. It is possible to register online — which is a lot like shopping online, except you receive fabulous prizes without the disturbing credit card bill. For real thrills, though, nothing beats in-store registration. First, you get to sit down with the registry consultant and watch with amusement as she struggles to appear unfazed with the two-grooms-no-bride conundrum. The best part, though, is when she hands you the special barcode gun. Oh, what power! Suddenly, you have renewed shopping energy. You walk through the entire store. Whenever an item tickles your fancy, you just scan the barcode, et voila! The electric nose-hair trimmer, the Halloween costume for your Jack Russell Terrier, the Zen Garden barbeque utensils — all appear on your registry! Be thoughtful in your choices, however. Give your guests a wide range of affordable options, and remember that some of them may not be comfortable making their selections from the toy room at Blue Boutique. Registering for gifts makes some people feel uncomfortable. It may feel as though you’re being greedy. In fact, many of you are greedy, but rest assured — registering is a standard social practice, even for those who are wealthy or who hold political office and therefore have no real friends. It may also be helpful for you to realize that even male-female couples sometimes miss the gift boat — which can handicap the beginning of an otherwise blissful relationship. I got married in 1978. I told him, “Look.

We have a five month-old baby. If you stall any more, you can forget it.” On a Sunday in December, he said, “Okay, let’s do it on Thursday.” (He picked Thursday because it was Pearl Harbor Day. I am not even kidding. Should this have been a sign?) With all that notice, our wedding gifts consisted of a couple of knives and a Hickory Farms holiday sampler. I never even got a wedding ring. Learn from me, people! A) Get married on purpose, for a good reason. B) Register for presents! You may never get another chance! Besides, your friends and colleagues want to get you a gift, and it places this big burden on them to figure out what that perfect gift should be. And if what you really want is the Sears Craftsman ratchet set, than that is what you should have. Do your friends a favor! Register for wedding gifts.

THANK-YOU NOTES By now, you have already set the tone and the level of formality of your wedding. Use this level of formality for your thank-you notes. (Please note that a formal affair is not rendered informal based simply on the behavior of the guests at the reception.) The more formal and traditional method would be an engraved thank-you card with the monogram of your married name. Some couples who have set an informal tone try to save time on the thank-you notes. Running off a batch of notes on your printer with blank spaces or checkboxes to be filled in later is the ultimate in tacky wedding behavior. I actually received a thank-you note that was done this way:

Thank you so much for the wonderful ____. What an original and clever gift! We will use it every time we have (choose one):  dinner  sex  company  nothing better to do  surgery  a fight This is wrong on so many levels. Formal or not, you must always send a thoughtful, hand-written thank-you note. I suggest that you do these in small batches, lest they all begin to sound alike: “Thank you for the lovely garden weasel. We know it will become indispensable in our daily lives. We just appreciate ’cha and all that you do …” Take a lot of breaks to keep your imagination alive. Avoid radio ads and all religious programming, as they will corrupt all creative thought. You may receive gifts that don’t really fit your needs. It is fine to exchange them for something you want, but never indicate this in the thank-you note. Find something positive to say: “Thanks so much for the hand-crocheted Budweiser toilet paper cozy. What a unique and useful gift. We immediately found the perfect spot to display it!” They never need to know that it is on permanent display at Deseret Industries. And if they ever ask about it while visiting, you can pretend it was stolen.

COSTS Many gay couples who choose to marry are somewhat older and established in life. Some, sadly, have strained family relationships. These couples will probably foot the bill for the whole wedding. Be forewarned that costs can be steep, and you will probably have to put off that Olivia cruise for awhile. If your families remain close to you, however, and want to take part, it is certainly appropriate to graciously accept help and financial assistance. And remember, when in doubt, the father of the bottom pays. Laurie Mecham typically denies the allegations.

What Jesus Did by William Todd Park



Honesty, Integrity & Reliability in your Mortgage Lender, Think DIVERSITY 1ST!

If you're looking for


The world of George Jetson was the 1960s cartoon fantasy of the future, complete with push-button convenience, animated billboards and of course the nuclear family with requisite two children and pet. Not a bad jump forward for a kid’s show when you think about it. For too many though, that cartoon mentality seems to be the sense of reality when it comes to family. We live a culture convinced that society should be G-rated, but beyond the finger painting-adorned refrigerators and the quiet suburban homes, the cold hard facts of the R-rated world are anything but animated. The media introduced us to the universe beyond our tidy but humdrum egocentric existences and with it, the undeniable face of imperfection. Is it any wonder that there were those who condemned moving pictures and television’s debut? Imperfection isn’t a bad thing — it just is. We are all but individuals with human emotions and failings. We make mistakes, we fall short of idealistic expectations, and we fall into lust and conceive children out of wedlock. The crimes we commit rarely fall into neat little categories and the resolutions to our problems don’t work themselves out with Dickensian literary neatness. No doubt for some families, those idealistic Father Knows Best days really happened and for others, they still do. But for the vast majority of people, life happens, genetics rears its head, and we prove we’re human. Enter the family of the 21st Century. The human drama still looks like it has for thousands of years, yet instead of cloistering away our socially imperfect women and children, we’re not only acknowledging that they exist, we’re actually addressing some of the problems. Regardless of motives, we can be grateful for government programs and non-profit social organizations that have sprung up to meet the needs of single parents. Some local congregations now extend real help rather than simply peddling an empty message. More importantly, we’re not letting overbearing bullies push their abuse under the rug any longer, despite one’s station in the business, government, or religious communities. It’s rare nowadays where the shame of a single indiscretion overshadows an entire life and the term “family” now embraces those who used to be social pariahs. Why would anyone with a conscience want to revert back to a black-and-white time gone by when these people were shunned and

hidden? Noses raised high in contempt at single women trying to put food on the table for their children have no place in today’s world. Neither should there be gasps when two people who happen to be of the same sex enjoy a committed loving relationship. Heaven help the young people who are 25 years old and unmarried. It doesn’t look like Utah has outgrown that one yet. Oh, the scandal! The battle to define the family is thrown all over the media’s playing field like the political football it truly is. In our attempts to be all-inclusive, we perpetually run the risk of offending someone by an unintended omission. The New York Times captured this spectacle in one of John Kerry’s latest meet and greets: “In Columbus, last month, the campaign chose a cul-de-sac seemingly assembled to appeal to its constituency — a Hispanic family living next to a single mother next to a black couple next to a military veteran next to a laid-off worker, with a foreclosed home in between.” The religious right seems to have a set ideal of what family means, but thankfully a growing number of their ranks has seen the light that the definition is painfully devoid of reality and compassion. In fact, the very writings that shape much of Western civilization would point adherents of Christianity to a much broader view of family. According to the Right Reverend Carolyn Tanner Irish, Bishop of the Episcopal Diocese of Utah, “Jesus redefine[d] the nature of ‘family’ — beyond blood or tribal loyalties. …What a radical shift from his religious culture!” What a radical shift that would be from our current religious culture if those professing a faith actually practiced its tenets as taught by their Master Teacher. Unquestionably “family” is beyond hard and fast definitions. Not government agencies, nor conservative think tanks nor churches can adequately depict a family. More than mere biology, the bonds forged by steadfastness in the midst of adversity make up the very essence of familial relationships and where natural families were not part of our upbringing, we end up surrounding ourselves with a serendipitous group of people who become the embodiment of what we and they truly need. Further, one must look elsewhere than the Bible to support the vague category called “family values.” I know of no consistently good “family values” stories in the Hebrew or Christian scriptures. Instead, such narratives tell of disobedience, jealousy and murder; rape, incest and infidelity. Nor was Jesus promoting “family values” in such a statement as: “Whoever loves father or mother ... son or daughter ... more than me is not worthy of me” (Matthew 10:37). What Jesus did do was redefine the nature of “family” beyond blood or tribal loyalties. What a radical shift from his religious culture!

Ruby Ridge Living Ruby’s Athletic Support by Ruby Ridge




Oh my God, blossoms, did you let out a giant sigh of relief when the Olympic flame was extinguished last week in Athens? After all the doomand-gloom prophecies of incomplete venues, imminent terrorist strikes, and a shortage of NBA divas, I was so thrilled for the Greeks for pulling it off so well. For such a little country to coordinate such a logistical fiasco like the summer games was just fabulous. Unfortunately, they are going to be paying for it longer than an immigrant with no credit buying a couch and end table at a West Valley Rent-to-Own furniture store. Pumpkins, I have such mixed feelings about the Olympics and the so called “Olympic spirit.” When I was a youngster, the Olympics seemed almost magical and the opening ceremony was an amazing, diverse, multicultural spectacle that just seemed to reinforce what a small, colorful, interconnected world we

really are. Now that I am an adult, the Olympics seem so corporate, pre-packaged, licensed, and marketed that I find it hard to care — which is really sad. The other thing that just freaks me out is who is playing for what country. It’s like a bad soap opera, muffins: The American runner was born in Bulgaria but was given a scholarship to USC at the age of three to train in water polo. Then he switched sports one summer while altitude training at the Olympic Training Center in Colorado Springs, after he met his future wife — a former Chinese acrobat — now playing soccer for the U.S. in memory of her dead father, an Argentinean shot-putter. But she’s marching under the flag of Swaziland because she has amnesia and she’s carrying Rulon’s baby! Dear God, it’s easier to chart the Kingston family tree. On a brighter note, I have been fortunate enough to visit several cities that have hosted Olympic Games to see what sort of legacy they leave. Calgary (great town; super nice people; go if you ever get a chance) renovated big chunks of downtown blight into really usable public space. They built the Saddle Dome, a train system, highway upgrades, and student housing at the University. The scale of the host city and the scale of the winter games worked for them.

Don’t get me started about the overblown edifice complex that was the Nagano venues. I’m just waiting for a James Bond movie to use them as a set and blow the damn things up. Sharon Stone would be great as nefarious super villain Clit Romney: “No, Mr. Bond — your domestic partnership to Q means nothing to me. Now die from the searing heat of this hateful Gayle Rusicka venom. Mwahahahahaa!” Oops, sorry — where was I? Oh yes, Sydney — which in my unbiased opinion was the coolest, hippest summer Olympics ever (fun city; super nice people; go for no reason). The Australian government invested big money into the airport, trains and huge venues, which today are barely being utilized. The best thing for Australia was the international exposure and the sense of nationalistic pride. If you ask the typical Aussie in the pub what they liked about their games, it wasn’t the athletic competitions themselves. It was the fact that their relatives came from all over the continent to be a part of the Sydney Olympics for a few weeks. That’s not a bad legacy. (Bizarre-but-true note: My spell checker stopped on “Aussie” and gave me “abusive,” “fussy,” and “hussies” as spelling options.) Ruby Ridge is one of the more opinionated members of the Utah Cyber Sluts, a camp drag group of performers who raise funds and support local charities. Her opinions are her own and fluctuate wildly.

Sane Advice When Is It Cheating? by Lynette Malmstrom Dear Sane Advice, My boyfriend and I need help settling an argument. I enjoy chat rooms on the internet, sometimes of a sexual nature. He says it’s cheating, even if I don’t have actual physical contact with another person. I don’t see why this even has to be a big deal. Is it cheating?

Virtually Faithful in Salt Lake Dear Faithful, Discussions about sexual behaviors and expectations have become much more complicated with the availability of non-contact encounters via the internet and phone sex. Whenever we attempt to renegotiate the rules regarding intimate expression, it warrants careful examination and clear communication. Keep in mind that unresolved arguments, especially about sex, are often the catalyst for divorce. Here are some things you may want to consider. If you are the partner who is looking for sex play separate from your relationship, what is it you’re seeking? Is it excitement? Are you bored? Are you looking for an ego boost? Is it the thrill of the chase? Has this become an insatiable curiosity and adrenaline rush, or is it an occasional distraction? Maybe you reject the terms of a traditional, monogamous relationship and this feels like a safe outlet. What are the costs? Whatever the motivation, and there may be many, is the time you’re spending on this pursuit enhancing your relationship or is it a deterrent to greater emotional and physical intimacy with your partner? Boundaries are easier to stretch than they are to reign in, meaning that if you open the sexual boundaries to include outside involvements, it will permanently alter the way you relate to each other. Quick hit, unencumbered sexual outlets don’t require you to do the difficult and meaningful parts of a relationship. They’re easy, but risky and shallow. They can quickly begin to replace the depth of a hard-won connection. What are the established expectations

regarding sexual expression — the spoken and unspoken contracts of your relationship? I’ve seen a number of clients who begin a relationship with an understanding that outside sexual encounters are acceptable. Sometimes there are conditions attached: I want to know (or don’t want to know) about them; only out of town; only with my prior approval or only if I’m present, etc. Obviously, it’s entirely up to the couple to determine what will work for them. As long as there’s agreement and everybody plays by the rules, you may avoid the other traps. Frequently, however, one partner may become uncomfortable with the arrangement and push for change. Then it’s back to the drawing board! So let’s get back to the original question: Is it cheating? When is it an affair? Whether we’re talking about sexual or emotional affairs, perhaps the defining characteristic is betrayal. If we betray our partner via sexual interaction or we attempt to hide a relationship (the old “what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him”), isn’t this the essence of an affair? Energy spent, often secretly, on the pursuit of sexual or emotional connection with someone outside of a committed relationship may be defined as cheating. Obviously, this is a very different kind of pursuit than the closeness we share with best friends or family. Check your intentions. We could easily debate various situations and attempt to dissect where the line is between “just playing” versus a threat to the relationship. The greater challenge is in understanding and honoring the commitments we make in our most important relationships without qualification. The two of you must decide what those commitments entail. Lynette Malmstrom, LCSW, is a private-practice therapist in Salt Lake City. The therapists who write “Sane Advice” would like to hear from you. If you have a question about relationships, emotional well-being or practically anything else, send it to

SEPTEMBER 2, 2004 ■



by JoSelle Va






eanna Willi ams and her partner Kim Carey kn ow first hand what tragedy look s like. After “j umping through a lo t of hoops” in cluding psycholog ical interview months-lon s an g waits to se e the only doc d the state at th tor in e time who w ould help sin females con gle ceive via arti ficial insemin their first ch ation, ild — a girl — was stillborn Williams, a fu . ll time social Utah AIDS Fo worker at th e undation an d the Harm duction Pro Reject, remem bers a poign counter that ant ennight at the hospital in O where the co rem, uple and thei r son Sulliva reside: “The n night nurse came in and were filling ou we t the death ce rtificate,” sh recalls. “Kim e was pretty ou t of it on med tion and we icawere waiting for this poor to be born so child we could bu ry her. And th nurse said, ‘O e k, so let’s see, where do we your inform put ation?’ This is three a.m it’s already b . and een two day s, and I just looked at her kind of and said, ‘Th is is Utah. Th is no place fo ere r my inform ation.’ “She looked at me and sa id, ‘No, that right.’ And sh isn’t e kept turnin g this paper like someth over ing was goin g to magical pear,” contin ly apued William s. “I think a lot of people don tion,” Carey, ’t pay attena stay at hom e mom, gen adds while b tly ouncing a fu ssy Sullivan, months old. four “They don’t have a clue you don’t hav that e any rights to him.” But whether or not most people know it, gays and lesbians hav e not been ab adopt their le to partners’ ch ildren under law since Gov Utah ernor Mike Le avitt signed House Bill 10 3 into law in 2000. After th Utah’s adop at, tion laws, w hich previou allowed any sly had adult to adop t, barred peo “cohabitatin ple g” in sexual relationship than “a lega s other lly valid and binding mar under the la riage ws of this st ate” from ad ing children opt— thereby le aving people Williams wit like h the same re sponsibilities heterosexual as parents, but few of the ri and protect ghts ions. “[ They’ll] le t me pay for my son’s med [bills] and sc ical hooling and the million d that it takes ollars to raise a ch ild,”

Williams says, “But [they] won’t give me the rights to protect me if something happens to the birth mother.” It’s a terrible situation, and one Utah attorney Laura Milliken Gray finds intolerable, particularly given the rights families and especially children receive from legal adoption. “Children gain a lot of legal rights through being adopted,” she said. “They get federal Social Security death and disability benefits if the adoptive parent dies, the right to inherit from that parent, the right to get on that parent’s health insurance through that parent’s employment and the right to stay with their non-biological parent if their natural parent dies or becomes disabled. The legislature just stripped those rights away and effectively bastardized these children because [these families] are unable to avail themselves of the protections available before the passage of that law. That really affected lots of families here.” After the new statute’s creation, Gray says she’s had to “get creative” in finding ways to help her clients gain at least some protections they would have enjoyed when she performed her first “second-parent” adoption for a Utah lesbian couple in 1998. Now that Utah law forbids unmarried couples from entering into these adoptions, in which the non-biological gay or lesbian parent fully adopts the child, gaining the full legal rights over their children that a heterosexual step-parent would have, Grey says she typically presents her clients with two options these days: co-guardianship actions and co-parenting agreements. According to Gray, the two arrangements work somewhat differently. In the first, the child’s non-biological parent simply enters into an agreement to act as his or her child’s co-guardian. Although a court has to file such an action, it grants the adoptive parents only a fraction of rights over their adoptive children. Co-parenting agreements, on the other hand, work a little differently. These are simply agreements between the two parents which define their intentions in raising the child together and provisions for how the child will be raised if their relationship breaks up or if one partner dies or becomes disabled. “One thing we’re seeing now in this marriage paranoia frenzy that’s occurring with these anti-gay marriage laws, particularly in Utah, is laws that try to prohibit gay couples from going to court for redress for any of the issues that may arise if their relationship ends,” including dividing property and arranging for visitation and child support, Gray explains. “It’s somewhat unclear as to whether these agreements would be honored by courts in every case or not, because it’s new and nobody’s tried it here yet. But my opinion is I have to do something.” Gray wants to do everything in her power to protect these families — not only from intrusion by third parties who might try and break them apart, but also “in the event there’s a break up so that both parents can continue their relationship with the child if that was their intention from

SEPTEMBER 2, 2004 ■



finances to fight [a custody battle].” the beginning.” She also recommends that It’s a worry for me,” Williams continues. gay and lesbian couples carefully plan their estates, naming partners as guardians “I have no ties to this child legally or blood wise. And right now our relationship is in wills and trustees when setting up trusts great, but legally if she wanted to, Kim for their children. could just pack up and go and there is abNonetheless, Williams and Carey see solutely nothing I could do. I couldn’t sue such necessary legal actions and papers as her in court or demand visitation.” more red tape to wade through, because “And I wouldn’t be able to demand child they only give them a fraction of the rights support for him either,” Carey adds. married couples enjoy. This became clear When it comes to challenging the law in to Williams when Carey went into labor court, Gray also hopes for the best, even with Sullivan seven weeks early. At this though she knows that the current climate time, Williams realized that she didn’t have of political hostility towards gays and lesbiany legal documents for their baby, and ans means Utah courts aren’t ready to hear her partner’s parents would have full rights challenges to the statute — yet. to her son if Carey died in labor — a very According to Gray, real possibility conafter testifying before sidering her high-risk the legislature against second pregnancy. “Our neighbors do not HB103, the bill limiting “I had to run home to legallyand hurry up and type care. They came to our baby adoption married couples, up a document of power of attorney and a shower. When Kim got out “When I was walking guardianship docuof the hospital they brought out, I walked by Gayle Ruzicka and said, ‘This ment specifying that if dinner over. The more is not over and I’ll see something happened to her in child birth, I got people I talk to the more you in court.’ I meant it, and I will get there to make the decisions I wonder who are these because I think this is a for [Sullivan],” Williams recalls. “I had two nurspoliticians representing manifest injustice. But when you bring those es witness it because when they say, kinds of suits you have there was no notary available and [hoped] ‘We’ve got to stop this?’” to wait for the right time, and now is not that that was going to the right time.” hold up in court.” Sadly, waiting for the She laughs at the right time seems an situation’s absurdity: increasingly harrowing task for Williams “I don’t think other people have to go and Carey, who fear that the increasingly through with that. Since he’s been born, hostile political climate Gray described we have to carry documents that don’t may have an immediate effect on their even mean anything in Utah. Cohabitation family — particularly with Amendment 3 agreements, co-parenting agreements, on the November ballot. stuff that is totally not legal, isn’t worth the “[If the amendment passes] we couldn’t paper it’s written on. None of it is more or even appeal to the legislature to do less in Utah, it just goes to show intent in anything about certain rights. It would tie case something happens to her. But we their hands because it’s a constitutional have to carry it everywhere.” Additionally, Williams said she chose not amendment,” Williams explains. “That really frightens me because I don’t know how to enter into a co-guardianship agreement far people will go. You know, does somedue to the high cost and the unlikelihood of an Orem judge granting such a measure. body call DCFS and say ‘they’re in violation of everything?’ Does it come down to, “I don’t have that kind of money right ‘I’m sorry — one of you is going to have to now,” she explains. “I mean, I’m a social move out or you’re going to lose custody of worker for two non profits so I don’t have your child?’” that kind of money. And co-guardian“I’d like to think that Utah would not go ship still doesn’t mean much. I mean, if that far, but without some kind of protecsomething happens to her, I could have all the guardianship papers in the world. Even tion in place and something to fall back co-guardianship. But if her married, hetero on, who knows if that’s the next step?” said Williams. “You’ve got people saying that siblings wanted to step in on her death, they’re going to win. They are blood related this child is being abused simply because he’s with two women — that he’s in an to this child. They can provide more. They abusive family and he’ll never grow up norhave a two-parent family with other sibmal.” After a pause, she continued, “You lings — even with co-guardianship I would know, I don’t know how ‘normal’ he’s going probably lose custody.” to be, but he’s going to be very well loved.” Although Carey’s parents and siblings Nonetheless, Williams takes some have accepted their relationship and their family, that acceptance doesn’t make either comfort in remembering the conclusion of her encounter with the night nurse at the of them feel more comfortable. Orem hospital the night her first child died. “You know after your child dies things “She got teary eyed,” Williams rememchange,” Williams says. “Her parents are bers. “She said, ‘That’s not right.’ I said, very cool right now, as cool as they can ‘Are you from Utah?’ and she said, ‘I’ve be, but she’s got some siblings who are lived here all my life.’ This is a nice little very wealthy and two parents and kids in Mormon nurse, you know, on the delivthe house, and I wouldn’t even have the

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ery unit and she was just floored that we were going through this and my name wasn’t going to appear anywhere on the death certificate. And that’s where I thought, ‘You know, I don’t think most people demonize samesex households the way politicians would like to think they do.’” “The more people I talk to the more I realize Joe average voter out there doesn’t care,” Williams continues. “Our neighbors do not care. They came Seanna Williams and partner Kim Carey holding their son Sullivan. to our baby shower. When Kim got out of the hospital they brought problems, we have arguments, we have dinner over. The more people I talk to the family stresses.” more I wonder who are these politicians “And we have the same goals for our representing when they say, ‘We’ve got to son,” Carey interjects, handing a cranky move on this’ and ‘We’ve got to stop this?’” Sullivan to her partner. “We want to raise “I wish people could know that we’re him to be a good, kind, generous, loving not different,” she continues. “My lawn human being.” has to get mowed once a week, my house Williams takes her son in arms, smiling: gets clean, my laundry gets done and I “We want him to go to school, and be a need to take my car in for an oil change. fabulously wealthy doctor someday,” she My kid won’t sleep all the way through the chuckles, “and marry a nice girl or a nice night — oh please oh please sleep all the boy — whatever he chooses to do and have way through the night — we have financial M a wonderful life.” 





110 WEST BROADWAY (300 SOUTH) • SALT LAKE CITY • 801-519-8515




Ted Clayton and partner Manuel Maravi

mitment ceremony at the United Church of Christ in Holladay where they are both members and they appeared in a 2001 article about gay marriage in The Salt Lake Tribune. Now, four years later, the Park City couple wants to do another progressive thing: They would like to adopt children. “We were talking as our relationship was maturing about the possibility of starting a family,” Maravi explains. “We consider ourselves already a family, but to add to our family children.” And so the couple began researching their options. “Our first inclination for us would be adoption,” Maravi says, “because why do you want to bring more children into the world if you have so many already who need loving families and loving parents?” When meeting with attorney Laura Milliken Grey to arrange their wills and assign powers of attorney, Clayton said he and his partner mentioned that they wanted to adopt. Unfortunately, the Utah statute had already changed to bar unmarried cohabitating couples from legally adopting children. Not content to lie to the Utah Department of Child and Family Services by say-

Adoption Laws an Insurmountable Hurdle for Utah Couple by JoSelle Vanderhooft “It was not common, when Ted and I got engaged,” Manuel Maravi remembers. When he told one of his gay friends about the engagement, the friend laughed out loud. “He said gay people don’t get engaged.” The friend’s bewilderment notwithstanding, Maravi, a concert pianist, piano tuner and teacher, and his partner Ted Clayton, a pianist, still became one of Utah’s first gay couples to travel to Vermont in 2000 to obtain a civil union. They also had a com-

States Weigh in on Gay Adoption Although only three states — Utah, Missouri and Florida — currently prohibit gay and lesbian couples from adopting children, state courts and legislatures have wrestled with the issue with increasing frequency over the last four years. • In February 2003, Texas State Representative Sid Miller filed House Bill 916, also known as the Defense of Families Act. This bill would have amended state law to require a petition for adoption to be filed by a man and a woman as opposed to one or more people of either sex. • During the same month, a Colorado bill that would have authorized adoptions for same sex couples and given their children access to health insurance and inheritance from both parents died on the House floor. The four voting Democrats approved the bill while the seven Republicans united against it. • Three months later, the California Supreme Court heard a case involving Sharon S. and Annette F., two lesbian partners who had jointly adopted one of their children, whom Sharon S. had conceived through artificial insemination. Following the couple’s separation, Sharon S. wanted to withdraw her consent to allow her partner to adopt their second child. Although a San Diego trial judge prohibited Sharon from doing this, a state appellate court later ruled that the second-parent adoption process hadn’t been established under state law. Instead, the court ruled that the process had been arranged by administrative agencies which lacked authority to approve such adoptions except in cases involving married couples. The decision caused widespread panic among California’s gay community, many of whose families feared their rights to their children would now no longer stand up in court even though California law had allowed same-sex couples in registered domestic partnerships to adopt since 2002. • Despite repeated challenges from the ACLU, lawsuits from gays and lesbians including adoption



support from our families,” Maravi explains. “My family are too poor because they are from Argentina, and he doesn’t have the support of his family. So if you don’t have a job, what are you going to do?” Additionally, Clayton says he is reluctant to move to a state that allows gay couples to adopt because he enjoys living in Utah. “I can’t say for Manuel, but I wouldn’t specifically move for that reason [to adopt],” he says. “If we got to the point one day where we could have a second home in a place like that, dual residency, that’s something I would do, but I personally wouldn’t move to California just so I could adopt. I like living in Utah, I like the people here for the most part and I love where we live.” So, at least for the moment, the couple can only wait and hope that Utah’s adoption statutes are subject to a revision allowing gay couples to adopt. “I’m a piano teacher and I work with children a lot, and it’s just wonderful to see how much difference you can make in the life of a child, just trying to give them music education,” Maravi says. “We’ve had the chance to baby-sit for our family members, so we are parents for a week, and it’s just a wonderful feeling. It’s incredible because these kids depend so much on you. You help them do their homework, and you have to prepare their meals and [see] that they are on time to school. All of that reminds me [what] my parents did with me, and it’s valuable. It’s just a unique experience to be a father. It is something very special that you will never have otherwise.”


ing they were merely roommates because they had always been “open about our relationship,” Maravi and Clayton looked into other options. As a gay male couple facing different options than a lesbian couple, who can have children through artificial insemination, the couple examined options that could work for them, including surrogate pregnancy. The prohibitive costs made them back down. “One company sent us this at the end of 2001,” Maravi says, producing an information packet from a company specializing in attempting surrogate pregnancies for gay male couples to adopt. “Twenty thousand dollars for only one try, and if it doesn’t work your money’s gone,” he muses. “Then there are all the fees you have to pay: $74,000 and they don’t guarantee you that she will get pregnant.” “Most of them fall around the $50,000 range, and that’s just a lot to save up,” Clayton adds. “Eighty-five thousand is like a condo,” Maravi elaborates. “For medium-income people like us, this is out of our budget for the moment. It’s just so sad to put off having your family because of a money thing.” Money is an important issue for the two men, particularly as their families are unable to provide them the financial assistance heterosexual couples often receive after marrying. This reality has made not only surrogacy but also moving out of state to adopt — or adopting a child from a foreign country — an impossible goal for the couple, at least at this time. “We had to do everything by ourselves, even our wedding — and we don’t have

advocate Rosie O’Donnell and harsh criticism from former US Attorney General Janet Reno, Florida’s ban against same-sex couples adopting children continues to hold. Anti-Equal Rights Amendment activist and singer Anita Bryant was instrumental in drumming up support for this law as part of her save the children crusade in 1977. • According to a 2002 Lambda Legal study, Arizona, New Mexico, Idaho, Montana and Wyoming have not yet allowed second-parent adoptions, even though any single adult may adopt in all five states. While Colorado codified disapproval of second-parent adoptions, Nevada’s lower courts have permitted such adoptions, although Nevada state law allows only married couples and single individuals to adopt. Despite these unfavorable rulings, some state courts, particularly appellate courts in the Midwest and along the East Coast, have drafted laws permitting secondparent adoptions for gay and lesbian partners, or have struck down statutes prohibiting such adoptions. • In 1999, New Hampshire repealed legislation banning lesbians and gays from adopting children or being foster parents. Two years later, the state legislature considered broadening the ruling to grant rights and responsibilities to both parents in unmarried gay, lesbian and heterosexual relationships, including allowing courts to decide custody if the relationship dissolved. Until 1999, New Hampshire’s anti-gay adoption statute had been one of the harshest in the country, prohibiting straight couples from adopting children if they had a close gay or lesbian relative or if they permitted gays or lesbians to stay in the same house as the child. • In March 2003, Indiana’s Court of Appeals overturned a lower court decision which ruled that a woman’s lesbian partner was not an equal parent. In defense of its ruling, the court said the state’s adoption statutes didn’t specifically prohibit second-parent adoptions. Thus, the lower court had no legal reason to throw the case out. — JV

2THURSDAY WEST SIDE STORY IN PICTURES. The Salt Lake City Arts Council is holding the exhibit “Our West Side,” a show curated from three different shows of photography and mixed media primarily made by west side youth. Through September 10, Park Gallery at the Art Barn, 54 Finch Lane, (1325 E. 100 South).

3FRIDAY BIRLS AND GOYS Local choreographer Chelsea Elliss presents “Gender Neutral,” an evening of dance, music and performance art orbiting around issues of gender identity. Elliss delves into the discrepancies of pop culture and displays them on a platter of movement for everyone to sample. The night promises to be shocking, surprising and educational to anyone willing to open their mind. Featuring San Francisco transgender artist and choreographer Sean Dorsey, whose modern dance work is traveling the country. 8pm, Leona Wagner Black Box Theatre, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $15 at 355-ARTS or

4SATURDAY TAKE A HIKE. Lambda Hiking Club sets off on a four-mile/three-hour easy hike to Lake Solitude and Twin Lakes up Big Cottonwood Canyon near Brighton.

10am, Chevron station, 200 S. 700 East. Carpool to Silver Lake Trailhead. Trail climbs 300 feet in the first mile to Lake Solitude and 700 feet over a ridge, descending to Twin Lakes with a lunch break.

PIXIES IN DIXIE, Southern Utah Pride kicks off again with a night of film and dance in the beautiful setting outside Zion Park. 6pm, 7pm and 9pm film showings, OC Tanner Amphitheatre, Springdale. Springdale Park. Tickets $0–$10 per showing. 10pm–1am, Pride Launch Party and Dance. Springdale Town Park. Free.

5SUNDAY BIATHALON PRIDE PARADE. Southern Utah Pride heads to their pride festivities gathering people from Kayenta to Springdale by car, and to Springdale Town Park on foot. 1pm–3pm, Xetavia Gardens, 815 Coyote Gulch Ct, Kayenta. Drive to Ivins, Santa Clara, Green Valley, Bloomington, Bloomington Hills, River Rd, Bluff Street, St. George Blvd, Red Cliffs Drive, Tonaquint Drive, Washington, Hurricane, La Verkin, Springdale and meet at Springdale River Park. By foot: March from Springdale River Park to the Pride Festival in Springdale Town Park. LET THE PRIDE BEGIN. The Pride event at Springdale Town Park will feature Dana Kass, Kelexis Davenport and French Canadian singer/songwriter Lucy Blue Trembley. Vendor booths, childrens activity center,


THE GAY AGENDA Thousands of red-dressed and other gay and lesbian people spun and swum at the Metro gay day at Lagoon on Sunday, August 29. Two groups pose here in front of Dracula’s Castle. More Lagoon Day photos are at

artist and gallery exhibits, Chili cookoff and AIDS benefit. 3–9pm, Springdale Town Park


release of Latter Days on DVD happens today. Check Borders, Virgin and Musicland. OUT AGAINST AMENDMENT 3. Panini is again host to a cocktail reception to raise muchneeded funds for the final few months of the “No on 3” campaign. 5–7pm, Panini, 299 S. Main Street. $5 Contribution at the door

9THURSDAY WHAT HAPPENS IN WENDOVER... Salt Lake Metro, the City of West Wendover, the Nevada Tourism Commission, and the Peppermill, Rainbow and Montego Bay Resorts have teamed together to bring you a fabulous Gay Wendover Weekend. They’re rolling out the rainbow carpet for us. Circuit parties (that can go past 2am), pool parties (where you can wear that special illegalin-Utah thong), entertainment, gaming tournaments and classes. Through Sunday, Call 1-877-MONTEGO for packages.





DEAR HARVEY. Plan B Theatre Company brings another gay-themed production to Salt Lake City with A Letter to Harvey Milk. See the story on the next page. 8pm Thurs–Sat., 2 and 7pm Sundays through Sept. 26. Studio Theatre, Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $18 at 355-ARTS or

HALL MONITORS. As school starts, the safety of gay and lesbian students is of paramount importance. The GLBT Public Safety Liaison Committee presents a seminar on Student Safety. Students and parents should plan to attend. 7pm, Pioneer Precinct, 1040 W. 700 South. Free.

GOOD FOOD CHEAP. Thirty downtown restaurants are hawking their wares for 20 days at special prices as part of the Downtown Alliance’s Dine O’ Round. Each participating restaurant will offer a 3-course dinner for $25, with certain casual establishments offering a 3-course dinner for $15. No coupons, no punch cards. Just call the restaurant and make a reservation to order off of their Dine O’ Round menu. or 359-5118.

A NEW SEASON. Utah Symphony begins their 2004–2005 season with Schumann’s piano masterpiece, and one of the most popular classics ever written, Piano Concerto in A Minor, performed by Utah Symphony favorite and Van Cliburn International Piano Competition gold medal winner Olga Kern. Kern made her concerto debut at the age of 7, and by age 17 she had 15 concertos in her repertoire. The Symphony will also perform: Strauss’ Til Eulenspiegel’s lustige Streiche, and Beethoven’s Symphony No. 5. 8pm, Sept. 10 and 11, Abravanel Hall, 123 S. West Temple. Tickets $12–47 at 355-ARTS or



BLUCIE TRUE LEMBLAY. Called one of the most important singers in the women’s music scene, lesbian singer/songwriter Lucie Blue Tremblay delights her audience with her sultry, haunting voice. Utah singer/songwriter Kathryn Warner will open this concert. Lucie Blue will also be performing at Southern Utah Pride over Labor Day Weekend.



of year again. The Goodtime Bowling League is starting up its fall-winter season. Come as a team or come as you are and they will team you up. 7pm, Bonwood Bowl, 2500 S. Lucie Blue Tremblay. Main Street. 832-9745 See Saturday, Sept. 11

FORE THE LOVE OF THE CENTER The annual golf tournament at Stonebridge Golf Club is a benefit for the GLBT Center of Utah. 8:30am shotgun start, Stonebridge Golf Club, 4415 W. Links Drive. $85 registration. Call Marie at 539-8800 ext. 0.

L-O-L-A LOLA Lola’s annual fish fry happens at the Trapp. 4pm, The Trapp*, 102 S. 600 West.

13MONDAY MORE DATES IN A NIGHT THAN A TRUE HOOKER. Salt Lake Metro and Club Panini’s Speed Dating returns for a second round. Meet several people for 7 minutes apiece for a quick ‘date.’ Mark the form which people you want to meet again sometime, and if they choose you as well, you will each be given contact info for that next step in the dating game — a real live honest-to-goodness longer-than-a-quickie date. Call beforehand to register. 7pm, Club Panini*, 299 S. Main Street. 535-4300.

Plan-B Theatre Company is presenting A Letter to Harvey Milk, a play adapted from Leslea Newman’s short story of the same name. Newman is the author of over 40 books, including the celebrated


GET PUBLISHED. A special Open House will be held for the DiverseCity Writing Series. The series holds writing groups as part of a citywide program conducted by Salt Lake Community College’s Community Writing Center. Anyone can join a group at any time. There are no qualifications other than literacy in English and an interest in improving your writing in any genre. All participants may submit pieces for publication in a semi-annual anthology, and can participate in public readings, held to celebrate publication of Sine Cera. Drop by and check out the book, write a line or two of interactive poetry, or just listen and observe. 7pm, The Center, 351 S. 300 West. Free. Susan or Joanna, 957-4992.

Actor Yaron Schweizer

children’s story, “Heather Has Two Mommies.” “A Letter to Harvey Milk” was the Second Place Finalist in the 1987 Raymond Carver Short Story Competition, and has also been made into a film. This touching one-man show centers around an elderly Holocaust survivor as he recalls his friendship with Harvey Milk — the first openly gay public official in U.S. history — causing him to exam-

UPCOMING SEPTEMBER 18, Taste of the Titanic, Panini and Salt Lake Metro, SEPTEMBER 18, Allies Dinner benefitting Equality Utah PAC. $100, 355-3479. SEPTEMBER 19, Blue Alley Fair, Club 161*. SEPTEMBER 23 Patti Rothberg in concert at MoDiggity’s SEPTEMBER 23 Confessions of a Mormon Boy, 355-ARTS *a private club for members.

ine the origin of the pink triangle and befriend a lesbian teacher. Actor Yaron Schweizer was a member of Kibbutz Lotan and the Movement for Progressive Judaism in his native Israel, performing with Eliot Theatre and working as an activist for religious freedom. After relocating to New York City in 1990, he studied acting with Katheryn Gately and taught Judaism in Hebrew schools. In 1994 he relocated again — this time to a queer community in middle Tennessee — and joined the Eggplant Fairie Players theatre troupe. Since then he has performed in many productions and has written, produced and toured throughout the U.S. and internationally. Performances are September 10 through 26 in the Studio Theatre at the Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center at 138 West Broadway in Salt Lake. Tickets are $18 ($10 students) and may be purchased online at harveymilk.htm or by calling 355-ARTS. On Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights of the run, the Metropolitan Restaurant at 173 West Broadway is offering a three course meal for $25 per person. Call 364-3472 for reservations.

Choreographer Sean Dorsey. See Friday, September 3.

SEPTEMBER 2, 2004 ■




7:30pm, South Valley Unitarian Universalist Church, 6876 S. 2000 East. Tickets $10-20 sliding scale, 14 and under free. 944-9723. Proceeds benefit the South Valley Intern Fund.

Plan-B to Stage Newman’s ‘A Letter to Harvey Milk’

greatest characters — Oliver, Fagin, Nancy, Bill Sikes, The Artful Dodger and Bumble — spring to life once again in this celebrated musical as Broadway in Utah presents Oliver! The show’s unforgettable songs include “Food, Glorious Food,” “Consider Yourself,” “Where is Love?,” “You’ve Got to Pick a Pocket or Two,” “I’d Do Anything,” “Oom Pah Pah,” “As Long As He Needs Me” and many more. Some say this is the greatest musical ever written. Others don’t. Various times, Sept 14–19, Capitol Theatre, 50 W. 200 South. Tickets $30–45 at 355ARTS or

Now Playing ANACONDAS: THE HUNT FOR THE BLOOD ORCHID Scientists embark on a journey deep into Borneo’s jungle in search of the rare blood orchid, believing the flower holds the key to a pharmaceutical fountain of youth. But to reach the bloom, they must endure pouring rain, boating mishaps, paralyzing bug bites, cellular dead zones, and the snakes of the title. It’s mating season, so the super-sized anacondas are extremely peckish and regard the expedition as so much sushi. This lunatic horror-thriller lacks both terror and thrills, but provides unintentional laughs with its ludicrous dialogue, risible characters, and sub-B-movie plot. The acting by the mostly no-name cast is uniformly terrible, save for an adorable trained monkey who emotes far more efficiently than any of the humans. By no stretch is this a good movie, but if viewed as a live-action game to guess who gets eaten next, it mildly amuses. Grade: C- / Kinsey Scale: 0 (There’s no gay or lesbian content of any kind.)


CODE 46 In a dystopian tomorrow, a Seattle-based investigator (Tim Robbins) travels to Shanghai to expose a forger. But instead of apprehending his suspect, Maria (Samantha Morton), he sleeps with her, an affair made more reckless by the fact that they share a genetic link, which means intercourse between them is strictly illegal. In creating a world where manmade viruses cause empathy or selective amnesia and where people’s movements are strictly monitored, director Michael Winterbottom presents a chilling sci-fi vision, made more so by his rendering of a future that looks exactly like our present. It’s a fascinating premise, but the script so overflows with ideas that the tale eventually lapses into incoherence — a failure made more glaring by the unbelievable passion of the cold, chemistry-free leads. Grade: B- / Kinsey Scale: 1 (Winterbottom and screenwriter Frank Cottrell Boyce previously collaborated on the lesbian serial killer thriller Butterfly Kiss. Robbins won an Oscar for his portrayal of a sexually confused abuse survivor in Mystic River.)

COLLATERAL Mild-mannered L.A. cab driver Max (Jamie Foxx) picks up slickly dressed, gray-haired Vincent (Tom Cruise) in his cab and winds up being kidnapped by the contract killer and forced to drive from hit to hit in this tense, elegantly directed thriller from Michael Mann (The Insider, Heat). While there’s nothing new happening here, Mann uses the catand-mouse formula well by shrinking its physical scope (imagine the cat swatting that doomed mouse inside a car for two hours) and playing his actors against type. The normally funny Foxx is deadly serious and conflicted, while the often irritatingly heroic Cruise gets to be an evil, murderous machine. The audience gets a nearly flawless, nerve-wracked bit of escapist fun. Grade: A / Kinsey Scale: 1 (Neither Foxx nor Cruise have played gay, but supporting cast member Jada Pinkett-Smith starred in the lesbian-inclusive crime drama Set It Off; co-star Irma P. Hall appeared in Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil; and co-star Javier Bardem played gay in Before Night Falls, as well as appearing in Pedro Almodovar’s Live Flesh and High Heels.)

EXORCIST: THE BEGINNING Plagued by the atrocities he witnessed during World War II, Father Lankester Merrin (Stellan Skarsgard) long ago lost his faith. He rediscovers God on a visit to a Kenyan archaeological dig, but only after he senses the devil’s presence as he witnesses rampaging hyenas, horrific violence, and a possessed child. Hamfisted director Renny Harlin commits a mortal sin in delivering this dead-on-arrival prequel to 1973’s horror classic, The Exorcist. The handsome production

design, Oscar-winning cinematographer Vittorio Storaro’s luminous images, and Skarsgard’s sympathetic performance are wasted on this dreck that substitutes mindless gore and pointless action for genuine chills and a compelling story. One wonders if Harlin even appreciates the irony in his creation of such a soul-deadening exercise built around questions of belief. Grade: D / Kinsey Scale: 0 (There’s no queer content to speak of.)

THE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE Nightmares of bizarre wartime mind-control experiments plague Gulf War veteran Bennett Marco (Denzel Washington), who becomes increasingly convinced the dreams are real. When fellow vet Raymond Shaw (Liev Schreiber), an amiable congressman under the thumb of his powerful mother (Meryl Streep), becomes a vice-presidential nominee, Marco races to prove his suspicions before the brainwashed candidate can assume his position a heartbeat away from the presidency. Based on a Cold War-era novel (which was also made into a 1962 movie), this paranoid thriller adds to today’s political discourse as it transforms the villains from Communists into Halliburton-like corporate titans. Director Jonathan Demme ignores gaping holes in the plot as he effectively ratchets the level of suspense, but the talented cast is wasted on characters that operate as little more than pieces on a chessboard. Grade: B- / Kinsey Scale: 1 (Washington previously worked with Demme on the AIDS drama Philadelphia, while both Streep and Jeffrey Wright appeared in HBO’s Angels in America.)

THE PRINCESS DIARIES 2 The sequel to the popular 2001 family comedy begins with the elevation of Princess Mia (Anne Hathaway) to Genovia’s queen being thwarted by an obscure law that decrees only a married woman can rule. Given 30 days to find a husband, Mia settles for an arranged marriage with Andrew (Callum Blue), only to realize that she’s falling in love with dishy Sir Nicholas (Chris Pine) — the man who would usurp her throne. This emptyheaded, predictable romantic comedy is plumped like a sausage with pointless filler — an all-princess slumber party, for example — in director Garry Marshall’s desperate attempt to bolster a wafer-thin story. The production is handsome and so is the bland, personality-free cast, but pretty pictures and people do little to alleviate the tedium of this royal bore. Grade: D / Kinsey Scale: 1 (One of Mia’s rejected suitors is gay, as is her hairdresser, played in stereotypically flaming fashion by Larry Miller. Co-stars Julie Andrews, Heather Matarazzo, and Kathleen Marshall have all appeared in queer-themed projects.)




Jason Bourne (Matt Damon) thought he’d left his old life as a skilled assassin behind. But then he’s found by Russian criminals, framed with a crime he didn’t commit, and forced back into action. Add to his headache a CIA chief (Joan Allen) one step behind him and nightmares of memories he can’t quite piece together from a life he no longer remembers. There’s plenty of globetrotting location scenery to enjoy and the even more enjoyable sight of a grim, anxious Damon forgetting that he’s a movie star for a moment and really investing himself in Bourne, a hunted man who becomes the hunter himself. This still-chilly bit of post-Cold War espionage is made fresh with violent, seizure-induc-

ing camera work and a death-defying car chase that will leave audiences breathless. It’s that rare summer thing: a sequel that matches its original, and an action-thriller that doesn’t leave viewers feeling empty. Grade: A / Kinsey Scale: 1 (There’s no gay content, but some cast members have been in gay-themed films or films by gay directors. Damon starred in Gus Van Sant’s Good Will Hunting and as the sexually ambiguous title character in The Talented Mr. Ripley. Co-star Brian Cox played a gay pedophile in the indie film L.I.E., while costar Gabriel Mann had small roles in I Shot Andy Warhol and Stonewall.)

Kinsey Scale: 0 – not gay at all 6 – gay as a bunny

The People With AIDS Coalition of Utah is dedicated to providing educational and support services that enhance the quality of life for all people impacted by HIV/AIDS.

Ben Kingsley, Suspect Zero

SHE HATE ME Jack Armstrong (Anthony Mackie) has a plateful of trouble. He’s a corporate whistle-blower who’s just been fired and is being hounded by the Feds; his parents never stop fighting; and his lesbian ex-girlfriend, Fatima (Kerry Washington), and her partner both want him to impregnate them. Soon afterward, Fatima begins a side business in which Jack acts as sperm donor to a group of upwardly mobile lesbians at $10,000 a pop. Like Jack, director Spike Lee has trouble, too — only his is of the filmmaking variety. Lee is a scattershot director, juggling storylines and writing ranting, polemical dialogue that could only work in his own heavily stylized movies. And when his chaos works, as in Do the Right Thing, it can be brilliant. But when it doesn’t, as in this film, it’s a big, if well-intentioned, mess. Grade: C+ / Kinsey Scale: 5 (There’s pervasive lesbian content, but lesbian viewers may find it problematic that every lesbian character in the film feels the need to actually engage in passionate sex with Jack in order to conceive a baby. Turkey basters are mentioned but not taken seriously. Otherwise, it’s clear that Lee is trying to fuse the straight male perception of hot, lipstick lesbians with a more feminist perspective. It works occasionally. Mackie also appears in the upcoming gay-themed film Brother to Brother.)

SPIDER-MAN 2 Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire) has mixed feelings about being Spider-Man. He also has a full plate of trouble. His erstwhile girlfriend (Kirsten Dunst) may marry a man she doesn’t love; his best friend (James Franco) wants to kill Spider-Man to avenge his own father’s death; his beloved aunt is bankrupt; and, worst of all, Doctor Octopus (Alfred Molina) wants to destroy New York. Director Sam Raimi balances these stories and keeps breathing life and humor into a sequel-ready franchise that could, in less caring hands, simply become an assembly line of big-budget blockbusters, all sensation and no emotional weight. This Spider-Man, however, is a complicated superhero, a beleaguered, sometimes weak Everyman who happens to be able to save the lives of people in out-of-control speeding trains with his super-strong sticky web. And he’s just what the summer movie schedule needs. Grade: A- / Kinsey Scale: 1 (Molina starred as Joe Orton’s lover in Prick Up Your Ears, while Franco played James Dean in the TV biopic of the same name. Queer as Folk’s Hal Sparks — comicbook nerd Michael Novotny — appears in a cameo role.)

SUSPECT ZERO Disgraced FBI agent Thomas Mackelway (Aaron Eckhart) has barely started a new assignment in Albuquerque when he’s called to the scene of a horrific murder. Soon more bodies pile up, and suspicion falls on renegade lawman Benjamin O’Ryan (Ben Kingsley). O’Ryan shares Mackelway’s obsession with rooting out evil, but at the moment he appears to be on an active hunt and Mackelway fears he may be the prey. This stylish thriller rises above the ordinary with a plot that’s heavily dependent on psychic

phenomena, but while it is undeniably suspenseful, it’s also rather silly. Still, spooky special effects, evocative cinematography, eerie expanses of the southwestern location, and Eckhart’s and Kingsley’s soulful and empathic performances transcend the absurdity, making the results riveting. Grade: B / Kinsey Scale: 1 (Director E. Elias Merhige previously directed the somewhat queer-themed Shadow of the Vampire. Eckhart starred in the lesbian-adjacent Possession, Kingsley appeared in Maurice, and co-star Kevin Chamberlin was in Trick and In & Out. )

THE VILLAGE For the inhabitants of a rural village surrounded by woods, living in fear of the monstrous forest creatures that lurk all around them is a daily fact of life. And when it seems that the creatures are tired of an established “truce,” and a young blind girl (Bryce Dallas Howard) enters those woods to save another villager’s life, fear threatens to shatter their collective idyllic existence. To give away more details of this film’s plot would, similarly, destroy readers’ enjoyment of the carefully constructed mystery. But know that writer/director M. Night Shyamalan has created yet another odd cinematic world in which nothing is quite what it seems, surprises live around every corner, and things that go bump in the night may be harmless — or, then again, may destroy you. Grade: B+ / Kinsey Scale: (No queer content. Cast members include William Hurt, who won an Oscar for playing gay in Kiss of the Spider Woman, out lesbian actor Cherry Jones, Michael Pitt from Hedwig and the Angry Inch, and lesbian fave Sigourney Weaver, who appeared in Jeffrey.)

WITHOUT A PADDLE Tom (Dax Shepard), Jerry (Matthew Lillard), and Dan (Seth Green) are three 20-something buddies who decide to go off on a treasure-hunting river expedition to honor the memory of a recently deceased friend. The movie then attempts to be “meaningful,” with the trio having to learn life lessons to create “closure” instead of participating in tasteless, raunchy, testosterone-addled humor or moments of PG-13 horniness with busty, tree-hugging, wood nymphs. Too bad, because this pale imitation of Up the Creek could have been funny. Instead, the whole film seems to be afraid of its own potential for masculine obnoxiousness. It even misuses the stunt-casting of Deliverance icon Burt Reynolds, begging the question of how much failure filmmakers can pack into one bad comedy. The answer: a lot. Grade: D / Kinsey Scale: 2 (Homosexual panic is always fun to watch, especially when the panic-stricken straight men are huddling together for warmth while wearing nothing but their underwear. Jerry even says he’d rather die than do such a thing — but eventually he does, and becomes the one that creates a moment of sexual arousal among the guys. There’s also the requisite suggestion of girl-on-girl action. Green played James St. James in Party Monster, and Lillard co-starred in John Waters’ Serial Mom.)

Epic Proportions Hero 3 / 4 stars Directed by Zhang Yimou Mandarin with English subtitles by William T. Park Considered by many to be Chinese film maker Zhang Yimou’s crowning achievement, Hero dazzles the senses with an emotional score, a rich palette of colorful costumes and sets and breathtaking cinematography. The epic carries the Western mind to a place that rides the fine line between pageantry of the Oriental dynasties and fantasy. The tale is one of honor, nobility and changed hearts, set in ancient, divided China. The king of the Qin province (Daoming Chen) sought to unite the six warring provinces at the price of widespread carnage. The film opens as nameless wanderer (Jet-Li) is summoned to the king to detail his victories over would-be assassins Sky (Donnie Yen), Broken Sword (Tony Leung ChiuWai) and Flying Snow (Maggie Cheung). As his story unfolds, Nameless is

honored with riches and responsibility and commanded to draw nearer to the king with each stoically recounted conquest until he is near enough to the throne to assassinate the king himself. The king, we are told, hasn’t slept in ten years and remains armored out of fear of his enemies. He challenges the nameless man’s story and proposes his own version. Confronted, the true story comes to light. The subtle twist, which plays on the relationships, evokes greatness in the nameless man’s character that in the end does what the great king cannot. The plot interweaves exceptionally choreographed martial arts scenes where one doesn’t overshadow the other. Dramatic, flowing costumes enhance the characters where muted dialog and translation might not quite carry the full context. The colors in wardrobe change with the story’s perspectives and contrast well with the setting and countryside. Loyalty and sacrifice figure prominently in the overall message of the film. The shortcomings of Hero are minor. Some of the martial arts scenes are reminiscent of the airborne fight techniques made famous in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. While the speed of the nameless warrior’s sword is lauded, the hidden-wire flying fight sequences are distracting. Because the movie is character-driven, the truncated 98-minute American version may be missing some crucial elements of the original 120-minute Chinese production.

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 13 – 7pm Club Panini, 299 S. Main Street Have you ever been on a first date where within seven minutes you wanted to escape? At Speed Dating, you are set up with several seven minute dates, giving you time to get to know someone well enough to know if you want more. Call any time before the event or show up early to register. 535-4300.

“Hero” is now playing in theaters throughout the city.

Obituary Steve Baxter

burned down in August 2001. Earlier this year, Steve moved to live with his mom in Arizona, where he eventually passed away. Steve was known by many and loved by all who encountered him and will be greatly missed in our community.




It is with great sadness that we note the death of Steve Baxter, who has long been a familiar and beloved face in our community. Steve passed away Aug. 29 due to AIDS complications. Steve was born in Oregon to Joan and Art Baxter. He is survived by his son Michael Baxter, his sister Suzie, and his brother David. He grew up in the Oregon/Washington area. He served in the U.S. Navy during the Vietnam War in San Diego, California as a supply officer. He later moved to Salt Lake City and, in 1980, opened the popular gay club The Deerhunter on 300 West. The bar operated continually until, tragically, it


Red,White & Bubbly The Jugsy Challenge




by Beau Jarvis Hello everyone! Welcome to America’s hottest new game show, The Jugsy Challenge. I’m your host, Wink Tanninbaum. Let’s introduce today’s contestants: From the Big Apple, she’s a discerning wine critic who knows how to dissect wine with only a couple of sniffs and a single sip. KW, welcome to the show. Thank you, Wink — I’m excited to play. Our other contestant is a Salt Lake City resident. She’s a casual wine drinker who knows exactly what she likes and what she doesn’t like. CC, welcome to The Jugsy Challenge. Thanks, Wink! I am glad to be here. Alright everyone, here’s how we play! Our crack staff has selected two value-priced “jug” Chardonnays for you to taste. One is in the conventional 1500ml magnum bottle, which is the equivalent of two standard-sized 750ml bottles. The other wine is in the revolutionary new bag-in-box cask. This is an airtight bag that allows wine to remain fresh in the refrigerator for one month or longer. All you have to do is tell me which one you prefer! After I hear your answers, we move on to the bonus round. In the bonus round I will ask each of you which wine you would serve at your best friend’s house-warming party and which one you would take to your boss’s unbearably lame annual office party. The contestant who answers most convincingly wins our fabulous grand prize. Okay, contestants, let’s play The Jugsy Challenge! Wine number one is Hardy’s Stamp of Australia Chardonnay in a three-liter bagin-box cask. Hardy’s describes this wine as having “clean fresh citrus melon and peach aromas.” This three-liter box sells for $16; it is the equivalent of four regular-sized bottles. KW what do you think of this wine? Well, Wink, let me say that the packaging is great. Who wouldn’t want to have a fresh glass of wine available in the fridge at any time? This Chardonnay smells like canned pears in heavy syrup. It’s smooth and easy to drink, but unfortunately it does taste quite artificial. All right! Thank you, KW. Now, CC — what do you think? Wink, this tastes a little like nail polish remover.

Uh, thank you CC. Anything else? Yes, Wink. Can I have a glass of water, please? I really need to get this taste out of my mouth. Okay, contestants, moving along: Let’s taste Lindemans Bin 65 Chardonnay in a magnum bottle. That’s the equivalent of two regular-sized bottles. This wine sells for $12. Lindemans describes Bin 65 Chardonnay as offering “fresh white peach, pear and citrus aromas with a hint of oak complexity on the nose.” CC, give us your opinion, please. Wink, it’s really fruity. It tastes kind of sweet. I suppose I could drink a glass of this wine if I had to. And KW — your opinion? Wink, I smell butter and apple scents. It feels creamy in my mouth and the flavor lasts slightly longer than the first wine. This wine does indeed have the telltale qualities of a value-priced Chardonnay. I would select it over the bag-in-box wine. Thank you, contestants. Now let’s move on to the bonus round. CC, which wine would you serve at the house-warming party and which one would you take to the lame office party? Wink, if I had to choose, I would serve the Lindemans Chardonnay at the housewarming party and conveniently “forget” to take that other wine to the office party. I wouldn’t want to get fired. Thank you CC for your honesty. KW, may I have your answer? Wink, I agree with CC. While I think the concept of a bag-in-box wine is admirable, the quality of this Chardonnay falls below Lindemans Bin 65. However, I recommend keeping your eye on bag-in-box casks as many wineries are rumored to be offering their quality wines in this packaging format in the near future. Those were great answers, contestants! The judges have declared a tie. You both win our fabulous Grand Prize: one brand new, three liter bag-in-box wine! Excuse me, contestants? Well, ladies and gentlemen, it looks like our contestants have unexpectedly left without claiming their prizes. However, tune in again for the next episode of The Jugsy Challenge, coming up in the next few months when quality wines are finally available in this ingenious bagin-box wine cask package. Good night and cheers! Beau Jarvis is a sommelier and wine educator. He operates, an independent wine review and information website. He also manages, a weblog of entertainment and culture.

Dear Sane Advice: see page 13.


Queeriscaping Put It In Park by Brandie Balken

With these in mind, let’s assess your strip.


Now that’s what I call a parking strip! The handy city forester recommended the following: Honey locust (Gleditsia tricanthos) is a quick-growing deciduous tree to 70 feet, flowers inconspicuous, followed by long dark seedpods. These trees are wonderful for yard plantings as they leaf out late and go dormant early and the shade they provide is dappled, allowing ample light to under-plantings. Kentucky coffee tree (Gymnocladus dioica) is a gnarly, deciduous tree with moderate growth to 60-plus feet. Flowers are inconspicuous followed by long brown seedpods. These trees shine in the winter when their heavy, contorted branch structure is visible You must be thinking, “But this is all about trees! There’s nothing here about ground covers or perennials or anything like that!” Oh, my dearest readers, I have intentionally excluded this information in order to focus on grasses, ground covers, bushes etc. in my previous columns. I don’t want to risk being repetitive. If you haven’t read my former columns (gasp!) you can easily get a great list of drought tolerant, park strip-savvy plants at Trees are a stellar choice for parking strips. They give your guests a shady place to park, they prevent too much snow for building up on your sidewalks, they help cool your home in the summer, and they provide a sound barrier from the street — you get the point. Now we know, trees are the answer — and the question is, “What am I going to do with that damned parking strip?”

AVENUES. A must see charming restored victorian home. 122 M Street, 2 bedroom/1 bath, Great investment property. $159,500 For sale by owner. 359-0963 NEW LISTING 11696 Oak Manor Drive on the 16th hole of the Hidden Valley Golf Course. Very open 3,304 sq. ft. with 4 bed and 3 bath. 3 car garage on a wooded .26 of an acre. Priced to sell @ $280.000. Dawn Colbert, Signature Group RE, 979-3558. 3 BEDROOM DUPLEX $700/ mo $250 deposit 356 N 300 W 298-2774 or 867-3093

AVENUES INVESTMENT— Hardwood flrs, fplc, 3 bed, 2 bath, 1 car gar w/wkshp. Walk-out, stainless steel appliances. One yr. lease in place. $209,900. Dawn Colbert, Signature Group RE, 801-979-3558

2 BD CONDOS in Holladay area. Several floor plans from $84,500 to $110,000. Beautiful grounds & pool. Model open Sats 1-4. Karen 518-7155 Century 21 Elite. PERFECT 2 BED, 1 bath starter. Stream runs behind. Walkout patio w/park-like backyard. Quiet location, mature trees surrounding make it an ideal place for someone who has a night job. Great daytime sleeping. $90,000 Dawn Colbert, Signature Group RE, 801-979-3558 HOME FOR SALE 264 W Ardmore (350) N $425/ mo includes gas 298-2774 or 867-3093 DOWNTOWN TWIN HOME Model unit $138,650. 3BR/ 2BA, only one left. 586 N. 800W. See tour at urbanutah. com. Babs De Lay, Broker, cell: 201-UTAH

COMMERCIAL REAL ESTATE NEW OFFICE CONDO’S, Redwood Rd. exposure in S. Jordan. Starting at $125,000. 980–5,733 sf available. Cambridge office complex. Dawn Colbert, Signature Group RE, 801979-3558

FOR RENT AVENUES VICTORIAN Duplex 135 K St. 2+Bdrm 1.5ba skylights. New remod. 1200 sq.ft. Super clean.Cute! Dshwshr,W/ D,fridge,yard,storage,near #3 Bus stop. No pets/smoke $850+Dep.363-6184 1 BR APARTMENT. 264 W Ardmore (350 N). $425/mo includes gas. 298-2774 or 867-3093 3 BR DUPLEX, $700/mo, $250 deposit. 356 N. 300 W. 298-2774 or 867-3093

ROOMMATES QUIET GAY MALE, nonsmoker seeking roommate to share 2 bdrm condo in Taylorsville area. $350 a month includes utilities. Pool, hot tub, weight room. Call Larry at 913-7004. MASTER BEDROOM w/bath, walk-in closet & deck available in home with owner. 2 additional rooms negotiable. Near airport. $450 includes utilities, washer, dryer. Call Lisa 801-209-8757 SHARE A CUTE house downtown with 2 gay men. Cozy attic room in dormer, small. Rent includes all utilities except phone. Rent $250/month 641-3362.

FOR SALE JEEP GRAND WAGONEER 1985, SUV, 4WD, 6-cyl 4.2 liter engine, 4 door, power everything, CD, Allow Wheels, Rook Rack Silver & Gray. New tires, Showing its age but no major repairs needed. $2,000 OBO. Call Steven at (801) 323-0727. FORD TEMPO 1990 4-door, Runs. Selling as is. $600. Call (801) 359-9089 and ask for Gina.

ADAM AND ANDY by James Asal


Brandie Balken is a horticulturist in Salt Lake City and can be seen at Cactus & Tropicals.


FABULOUS 3500 SqFt 4BD 3BA Revival Period end unit townhouse condo on 3 levels of historic Graystone Mansion. Karen 518-7155. Century 21 Elite. More info

1 BED APARTMENT No pets/No smoking, new paint, carpet & appliances. $425 + 250 deposit 1320 So. 500 E Call MGR 467-8174.

This is what most of us have. Luckily, it is at this width that you are allowed to plant


CLASSIFIED/SUBSCRIPTION SALES. Salt Lake Metro is seeking a full time classified ad and subscription salesperson. Previous telephone sales helpful but not required. Must be available to work full time. Steven (801)323-9500 or

SALT LAKE Gorgeous architect remodel Upstairs Master Suite w/jetted tub,walk-in shower,vaulted Ceiling. $304900 exposed wood beams 1595 E 1300 S. Call Jim 209-6308



I was given two tree recommendations for this size strip: Purple robe tree (Robinia ‘purple robe’) is a quick-growing, deciduous tree to 40 feet with reddish bronze new growth and showy purple pink flowers in midspring. Sycamore maple (Acer pseudoplatanus) — is it a sycamore, or is it a maple? It’s a maple that looks like a sycamore without the pokey brown fruit, a moderately growing deciduous tree to 50 feet that provides heavy shade under a wide crown.

ADVERTISING SALES. Salt Lake Metro is seeking a full time salesperson for display advertising. Must have previous sales experience, vehicle and be available to work full time. Steven (801)323-9500 or

SANDY 877 E 7865 S. over 2,000 sq. ft. 4 bd, 2 bath, private backyard. Arbor over deck. 100% finished rambler. Seller relocating. $175,000.00 1 oversized car garage. Dawn Colbert, Signature Group RE, 979-3558.

If it’s less than 24 inches wide, you may want to consider using primarily decorative mulch, gravel or rock for your space. There will be no maintenance, no water use and no worry! If you wanted to plant a few specimens for interest, may I suggest some of the creeping junipers (Juniperus spp.). Not only will they add some wonderful color and texture, but they will tolerate drought, compacted soil and foot traffic.




It has been a little cooler (thank God!) and I have gotten back to my normal, gardening self. I’ve been out in the yard deciding what area to tackle next. You see, my friends, I have recently purchased a new home, and I must prioritize. I’ve decided to work on what is the most visible — and possibly the most frustrating — area. In this column, dear readers, I am grappling with that age old question that occurs to every homo-ner: “What am I going to do with that damned parking strip?” Honestly, what other piece of your property do you not really “own,” but must plan and maintain according to stringent government ordinances? Not only does the county make its demands, but the environment does also: The strip gets mounded with snow (often laden with salt); it gets run over, walked through and used as a rest area by neighborhood pets. Thankfully, it is a relatively small space, and with some well-chosen plantings, it can become a source of joy and pride to you and your neighbors for years to come. Let’s begin with the basic guidelines set by the county for parking strips. • The strip must contain at least 33 percent plant material. • No plants with thorns or barbs are permitted. • Groundcovers, annuals, perennials and shrubs should not be more than 18 inches in height when located within sightlines of a corner, driveway, etc. • Specimen plants up to 36 inches in height may be used when they do not interfere with a sightline, but may not be used as a continuous hedge or a screen. • It is strongly recommended that 80 percent of plants used are drought tolerant. • The remaining 67 percent can be bark, mulch, decorative rock, or pavers. (If your parking strip is less than 24 inches wide, the entire space can be non-vegetative material.) • Poured concrete and asphalt are not permitted. • You may not excavate within 18 inches of an existing tree. • Installation of a “carriage way” or formal walkway between street and sidewalk is strongly encouraged.

trees. I spoke to the city forester and he recommended three varieties for this size strip: Japanese tree lilac (Syringa reticulate) is a deciduous tree growing to 30 feet with smooth glossy bark and showy white flowers in early summer. Net leaf hackberry (Celtis spp.) is a deciduous tree similar to an elm in appearance and structure. These grow to 30 feet, with inconspicuous flowers followed by reddish brown fruit that attracts birds in the fall and winter. Golden rain tree (Koelreuteria paniculata) is a lovely deciduous tree slowly growing to 30 feet with bright yellow flowers in midsummer followed by rusty “lanterns” that hold through fall. Be aware that these drop round black seeds that, much like ball-bearings, can be a slip and fall hazard.





by David Nelson glyfada, greece — Leaders of the Germany-based sportswear giant PUMA Aktiengesellschaft Rudolf Dassler Sport, a major sponsor of music and sports in Jamaica, warned reggae singers that the company has a “zero-tolerance policy towards homophobia and prejudice.” Company leaders told Buju Banton and other Jamaican reggae entertainers that if they include anti-gay content in their Buju Banton concerts, they won’t be allowed to perform at companysponsored events and that the leaders will terminate any commercial deals they have with the entertainers. The warning was provoked by an Aug. 14 company-sponsored performance at the trendy Balux Beach Club. Banton and other reggae entertainers performed there as part of the Olympic Village entertainment. Olympic organizers approved the concert which was open to all athletes at the games. German and British gay leaders told company leaders about Banton’s songs like “Boom Bye Bye,” which urges listeners to shoot gay men in the head, pour acid over them and burn them alive. Amnesty International leaders reported also that Banton, whose real name is Mark Anthony Myrie, was identified by witnesses as part of gang who attacked four gay men June 24 in their Kingston, Jamaica home. Law-enforcement officers there are seeking to interview Banton in connection with this attack. Shocked by the revelations, company leaders issued a statement at a news conference in Athens, Greece, and sent a senior company official to inform Banton of their policy. Company leaders signed a sponsorship deal recently with New York-based VP Re-

cords, home to artists like Banton, Elephant Man and other singers whose music has been described as encouraging and glorifying violence, especially in Jamaica. “We are delighted with PUMA’s commitment to challenge homophobia in reggae music and in Jamaican society,” said Philipp Braun, head of the Lesbian and Gay Federation of Germany. “We hope other companies, such as the record labels, will follow PUMA’s positive example and refuse to tolerate music that threatens lesbians and gay men. We were shocked to learn that a German company like PUMA was associating with Buju Banton, who has openly advocated the shooting and burning of gays and lesbians.” Leaders of the Jamaica gay-rights group J-FLAG said in a statement that PUMA’s stand “sends a powerful message from a major sponsor and sets a precedent for others to follow. J-FLAG calls on other corporate sponsors of reggae concerts like Pepsi, Coca-Cola, Smirnoff Ice, and Benson and Hedges to follow PUMA’s lead.” “PUMA’s stand means that performers like Buju Banton, Elephant Man and others will have to choose between continuing to make anti-gay incitements to violence and lucrative sponsorship deals,” said Brett Lock, head of OutRage!, a group based in the United Kingdom. “They’ll have to decide which is more important: cheerleading harassment and attacks on lesbian and gay people or international superstar status. They may get away with their homophobic bile in Jamaica — where repressive legal discrimination against gay people still exists — but they won’t on the global stage.” “With sponsorships in jeopardy and concert dates canceled in Germany, Belgium, the United Kingdom and the United States — plus a police investigation in Britain and legal action planned in Germany — the days when reggae stars could incite homophobic violence with impunity are over,” OutRage! Spokesman Peter Tatchell said.


PUMA: ‘Drop Hate Lyrics or Lose Sponsorship’

UGRA 2004 RODEO Utah Gay Rodeo Association’s 2004 Rodeo drew over 500 spectators and participants from 10 states and Canada. The Paper Moon All-Around Cowgirl Shari Ralston (left) and Wells Fargo Bank All-Around Cowboy John Becker, both of Denver Colo., display their awards at a ceremony held Sunday, Aug. 29 at the Trapp Door. Locals Milo Bardwell and Ritchie Olsen won the Bacardi Silver All-Around Camp Buckles. More rodeo pictures at

Out Olympians Take Five Medals, Give One Finger by David Nelson athens, greece — Of the 929 gold, silver and bronze medals awarded during the 17-day Summer Olympic Games which ended Aug. 29, five were won by as many openly gay

Official PUMA Statement PUMA’s policy does not tolerate hate statements of any sort, including homophobic hatred or views that endorse homophobic violence. Upon Buju Banton’s arrival in Athens, a senior PUMA staff member will brief him on our zero-tolerance policy towards homophobia and other forms of prejudice. Buju Banton will be told that if he chooses to break this policy he will not be allowed to perform at the Athens show and will no longer be supported by the PUMA brand. Additionally, if Buju Banton defies this agreement and performs a song using anti-gay lyrics — either at the Athens concert or at any future concert anywhere in the world — PUMA will not associate with him in the future. This also holds true for all performers with which PUMA works. When speaking with Buju Banton and other artists, specifically in the Jamaican community, we will inform them of our zero tolerance stand on hate statements and lyrics. PUMA will encourage reggae artists to take responsibility for their lyrics and their global impact. PUMA is committed to working together with lesbian and gay organizations to challenge homophobic hatred, discrimination and violence in Jamaica and elsewhere. — Paul Gautier, International Marketing Director

Olympic silver medalist Judith Arndt of Germany

athletes who represented the United States, France, Germany and the Netherlands. Two others including lesbian tennis legend Martina Navratilova of the United States competed openly but failed to earn medals. Judith Arndt of Germany won a silver

medal for her performance in the Cycling Women’s Road Race competition in her first Olympics. She completed the race with her middle finger displayed prominently to the judges to show German officials her anger that they cut her lover and partner, Petra Rossner, from the team despite the fact that Rossner had earned the ranking. “Petra is the best sprinter in the world,” Arndt said. “I’m sad that she did not ride with me. I dedicate my medal to her.” International Cycling Union officials fined Arndt $162 for the gesture. Johan Kenkhuis of the Netherlands and his teammates won silver medals in the Swimming Men’s 4 x 100m Freestyle Relay Final competition in his first Olympics. Amelie Mauresmo of France won a silver medal in the Tennis Women’s Singles Gold Medal Match competition in her second Olympics. Robert Dover and Guenter Seidel of the United States won bronze medals in the Equestrian Dressage Team Grand Prix competition in Dover’s sixth Olympics and Seidel’s first. Rob Newton of the United Kingdom failed to advance in the Track & Field Men’s 110m Hurdles Round 1 competition in his first Olympics. Navratilova failed to advance in the Tennis Women’s Doubles Quarterfinal 3 competition in her first Olympics.



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GAY WINE CLUB. Join qVinum at for monthly wine tastings and events.

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FUN STUFF Crossword Puzzle






Since we’re on our way to Wendover, we should brush up on Nevada lore. Designated by italicized clues.
























24 28

32 34








47 51

48 52


56 59 66

60 67

61 68





55 Midget 56 Council 57 Molt 59 Divorce Center 61 Qualified 62 Selector 63 Chows 65 Owns 67 Single




36 Home of Vegas strip 38 Take the rind off 39 Russia 40 Silly (slang) 42 Make unclear 46 Usual 47 Roman thirteen 50 Relative 52 Genomic expert from Utah 53 Guidance 54 Bake eggs

48 Clairvoyance 25 49 Wield 51 A competition 29 30 31 54 Small bunch of 33 flowers 56 Slid on the Tahoe 41 42 mountains 57 Unassertive 45 58 Way to dispose of 49 50 nuclear waste in Yucca 60 Occupy 54 55 64 Peak 58 66 Chinned comedian 57 68 Shin 64 65 69 Writer Bombeck 70 Later 69 71 Acclaim 72 Prohibitionists (inf.) 72 73 Traveled by car costume 74 Pulls in 11 Not Hispanic DOWN 12 Partly frozen rain 1 Nab 13 Dr. Jekyll’s “partner” 2 Lawyer (abbr.) 21 Father 3 Winged 23 Sign language 4 Head of Islam 26 Red headed orphan 5 Insane person 28 Point 6 Fast plane 29 Dumb as a shrub 7 Ms. Channing 30 Ancient Indian 8 In a frenzy 31 Destination 9 To write again 35 Entire 10 Nevada showgirl



ACROSS 1 Was the National Negro Committee 6 Pock 10 Hit 14 Book of facts 15 Very 16 Merely 17 Pope’s country 18 Walked 19 Mature 20 Words to a song 22 Gumbo 24 Nevada ghost town founded by Gus and Dick Lee 25 Vial (obs.) 27 Knotted scarf 29 Nevada state animal 32 Contagious disease 33 Card game not played in Nevada casinos 34 Play 37 Nevada neighbor is famous for these 41 Rocky Anderson was called this by AFL-CIO 43 Sickly 44 Mexican dollar 45 Try your luck at the gambling ___ 46 Rest





DWF,59,Warm,kind,fun, feminine, attractive professional seeks same. LDS/given up on men. Seek emotionally commited, stable relationship. Love music, conversa., the out of doors, Young/active

PERSONALS MISSED CONNECTIONS CLUB PANINI You were at speed dating but didn’t participate. Going to this time? Hope so. REPLY TO BOX 89, PERSONALS@SLMETRO.COM

LAGOON You: burgundy shirt, khaki shorts. Me: red tank. We were banging each other at the bumper cars. Hope to bang some more. REPLY TO BOX 91, PERSONALS@SLMETRO.COM

TRY-ANGLES Saw you at the urinal. Nice. You laughed at where my eyes were. REPLY TO BOX 94, PERSONALS@SLMETRO.COM

MGD AND TOXIC WASTE. Aug. 7 near Tesoro oil refinery in North Salt Lake. You: on late-model Harley wearing leather chaps. Me: in hazmat gear cleaning up a chemical spill. On my break, we shared a 40-oz bottle of MGD in a gas station parking lot. I can’t get you out of my mind. REPLY TO BOX 81, PERSONALS@SLMETRO.COM

DEER VALLEY Amphitheater during the Aug. 14 performance of H.M.S. Pinafore. We smiled at each other in the refreshment line during intermission. Can I call you my Little Buttercup?

GATEWAY. You were dancing in the fountain. Shirtless, tan and in cutoffs. I was sitting on the rocks staring and you began dancing for me. Was that your girlfriend or friend?

YOU WERE IN the rented car in Oxbow Park reading book, “Hey Dude Who Stole My Country.” I was in white Rabbitt. Said hi. You looked at me and said hi and left. I like Michael Moore too. Let’s go see F911 together.




MEN FOR MEN YES SIR, OFFICER! Goodlooking, professional GWM, mid-30s, seeks dominant law-enforcement professional, 35-55. I’m healthy, clean, discreet and eager to please. Wild times, no strings. REPLY TO BOX 86, PERSONALS@SLMETRO.COM


PERSONALS $1 323-9500


GWM SEEKING BEAR for friendship or more. No smokers. No partyers. Must be employed. Mid 40’s, furry, beard a plus. Must like massage, long walks, and home cooking. REPLY TO BOX 88, PERSONALS@SLMETRO.COM

SPEED DATING If you have tried all the other ways to meet that special someone, try Speed Dating sponsored by Salt Lake Metro at Club Panini, a private club for members. Monday, Sept. 13, 7pm. Register in advance at 535-4300.

QUESTIONING? Ex-gay? Reporter would like to talk to you for upcoming Metro story on people who have tried to alter their sexual orientation. I will honor your choices and respect your privacy. Brandon 323-9500.



SPEED DATING Club Panini Mon. 9/13, 7pm. 535-4300

AM I READY? Perhaps it’s time to try again. 40 looking for 30s. Arts, travel, festivals, camping, getting out and doing things. Watching a video by the fire is nice too. Not big on bars, but get there often enough. Wanna know more? REPLY TO BOX 101, PERSONALS@SLMETRO.COM

WOMEN FOR WOMEN NEW IN TOWN, or interested in meeting new friends? Come to sWerve monthlies, 3rd Saturday of each month, GLBT Center. Info 539-8800 ext. 25 or www.swerveutah. com (join email list!)



















BITTER GIRL by Joan Hilty

SEPTEMBER 2, 2004 ■






A D m s i A r u V o T E Nmission on


Metro, Volume 1, Issue10  

Utah's gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and ally magazine. Red Tape: Protecting Gay and Lesbian Families