Purpose Driven Women Magazine featuring Dr. Peggie "P.J" Ingram McPhee

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Publisher Kimi Johnson, PurposePals LLC

Editor-in-Chief Carmelita Mcroy

Design Editor Brittany Rockwell

Cover Feature

Dr. Peggie “P.J. Ingram” McPhee Photographer: Mari Alexis

Contributing Writers

Clarissa Partlow Tikia McGhee Christina Malloy Edana J. Perry Dr. Sheila E. Sapp Carleeka Basnight-Menendez

Share My Story

Debbie Andrews Dr. Cynthia J. Hickman Purpose Driven Women Magazine is a publication of PurposePals, LLC. The information in this publication is presented in good faith. The publisher does not guarantee accuracy or assume responsibility for errors or omissions.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Jeremiah 29:11 NIV OUR MISSION Imagine a world where every woman knew exactly why they were created. Despite their economical background, past failures, trials, or tribulations they believed they were more than enough to thrive as the person God created them to be with ease and flow. Our Vision is to create an international publication that creates unification and connection amongst women from different walks of life, giving them an opportunity to uplift each other by sharing stories, resources, products, and expertise.

OUR VISION Purpose Driven Women Magazine’s Mission is to inspire and encourage women to discover and surrender to the plan God has for their life. We give everyday women a voice and platform by means of testimonials, interviews, training, resources, and informative articles to share stories of how their faith helped them to overcome hardship. EBSITE: pdwag.com

Copyright 2020 © PurposePals, LLC.

All rights reserved. Reproduction, in part or in whole, without expressed written consent of the Publisher is prohibited. All photo stocks are generated from canva.com.

Purpose Driven Women Magazine is the woman's guide to connecting to and thriving in their purpose. We are a bi-monthly digital faith based magazine designed to provide inspiration for women on their purpose journey. Our publication is published by PurposePals, LLC.

CONTACT INFORMATION PDWMAG.COM EMAIL: HELLO@pdwmag.com

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6 PDWMAG.COM February Special Edition 2021

6 Years

I ALMOST GAVE UP!!

Dr. Peggie McPhee

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12

PLANT YOURSELF IN GOD

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HELLO FEAR

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PERSERVANCE POWER

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A JOURNEY OF DUTY AND HONOR

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RACE

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DREAMS, DAUGHTER, DEPARTURE

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FAITH MATTERS

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BITTER OR BETTER

CONTENTS

Debbie Andrews is a breast cancer survivor, advocate, and author. She is a speaker on the topic of “Living with and Beyond the Breast Cancer Diagnosis.” She openly and transparently shares her journey to encourage others as they walk through their journey. Debbie incorporates positive affirmations and indomitable faith to survive breast cancer. www.debbieannandrews.com

Tikia McGhee, affectionately known as Lady T, loves the Lord with all her heart, mind and soul.

She is the beautiful wife of Pastor Darrick D. McGhee, Sr. and an amazing mother to Darrick D. McGhee, II and Tania McGhee. Tikia is also a daughter, a sister, an aunt, a friend, a mentor, a blogger, an encourager, an intercessor, the First Lady of Bible Based Church Tallahassee and so much more. www.tikiadmcghee.com

Carleeka Basnight-Menendez is a bestselling author and prolific speaker with global appeal. She is the creator of the F-IT Method and Menopause and Mimosas.

She is the voice the world needs and believes that when you change your perspective, you change your life.

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Clarissa Partlow is the creator and writer of the Finding My Fifty Plus Life blog. She resides in the Greater Atlanta area. She has co-authored two anthologies, Lessons from My Grandmother’s Lap and Woman Heal Thyself. Clarissa has two adult sons, a daughter in love, and two granddaughters. findingmyfiftypluslife.com

Edana J. Perry is a wife, mom, minister, poet, and author who is passionate about couples and families.

She shares knowledge gained from her professional and marital journey with transparency, honesty, and humor. Reading a book, listening to gospel, jazz and R&B at the beach is her happy place. www.kaylarossperrymemorialf oundation.org

Christina Malloy is from Fayetteville, North Carolina. Writing letters and poetry helps her release the stress in her life. A lot of her poems are love letters to God and prayers to help her make it through.

Dr. Sheila E. Sapp is a retired educator and former school administrator with years of experience with parents, students, teachers, and school leaders. She has served as a reading specialist, elementary curriculum director, adjunct college instructor, author, and speaker. Dr. Sapp owns Sheila E. Cares Educational Consulting and Services, LLC.

christinamalloy@yahoo.com

sheilaecares.com

Dr. Cynthia J. Hickman is an author, speaker, and proactive caregiver advocate. She retired from a nursing career to care for her mother. She earned a Ph.D. in Health Services and a Masters in Nursing Education both from Walden University and a bachelors in nursing from Prairie View A & M University. cynthiajhickman.info/

April 2021 PDWMAG.COM

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Become a Better You!

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Letter from the Editor

Giving Up is Not an Option!

Hello Purpose Driven Women; Have you ever been stressed, overwhelmed, or felt like giving up? I am sure if most of us admit it, we all have felt that way at one time or another. Trials and struggles come to all of us, but as a woman with purpose giving up is not an option. No matter how hard things get in life we can never give up because we serve a God that is bigger than our problems. I do not care how bad things get in our life we must sit and evaluate the situation. Did we cause this drama in our life or is it a distraction because we are on the right track? Am I taking on other people’s baggage, which I should not?

You have a purpose in life, do not let anything get in the way of you fulfilling it. Say no when you need to so that you do not get overwhelmed with life. Situations will come in life and some of them will seem unbearable, but I say stop and seek your heavenly Father who has the answer to everything in life.

If giving up was an option He would not have given us the answers to every situation in life in His word, The Bible.

As you read this issue, I know you will be encouraged and uplifted to continue to pursue your purpose, your goals, and dreams. Never forget, “giving up is not an option”.

JOIN OUR TEAM Are you looking for a professional and inspiring platform to share your content? Our design team will transform your content into a beautiful editorial design to be published in Purpose Driven Women Magazine. This is a great way to help expand your reach, jump start your writing career, and gain more followers all while inspiring women on their purpose journey.

Our inspirational topics include:  Spiritual Inspiration  Love and Relationship  Wealth and Prosperity  Family  Beauty and Wellness  Health and Fitness Visit pdwmag.com/submissions to get started.

Remember to always Expect It, Believe It, Receive It Carmelita Mcroy Editor in Chief

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Plant Yourself in God

By Clarissa Partlow

Three years ago, when I set out on the journey to find my fifty-plus life, I searched for the woman I thought I was. I quickly learned I had no clue. I had defined myself based on how I thought others saw me. I believed things about myself that were not true. I am not fond of this phrase, but I realized I did not know who I was. At the ripe old age of fifty-seven, I had an identity crisis.

Like so many women, I found myself at a place I did not know what I wanted.

I spent many of my years as a mother, employee, and wife at one point. I had put the needs of others above my own. So, when I found myself alone without all the things or people that made my world, it was an eye-opener.

My identity crisis was plain to see after I relocated to Georgia. What I thought was not a problem became a hindrance. I did not recognize it right away. After three years of being together, I relocated for a fresh new start after being left by my husband. The marriage abruptly ended, leaving me broken and confused.

After I relocated, finding a job was more difficult than I thought it would be. I was not able to find one as quickly as I had hoped. During my job search, potential employers would say, tell me a little about yourself. I have always hated this part of an interview, but I would stumble my way through to answer. Why was it so hard to tell them about me?

I was not able to confidently communicate who I was or who I understood myself to be. I was no longer the mother of the boys that people thought were twins, the case manager who worked at one of the largest community action agencies in South Carolina, or a wife. Who was I? What were my hopes and dreams? These were questions that I could not answer.

Without realizing it, I had placed my identity in the external and not in the God who made me. God is good to us, and He is patient. If you ask Him to show you who you are, He will do just that. The key is to believe that you are who He says that you are. To find your life, you must lose your life, as it says in Matthew 10:39. In finding my fifty-plus life, I have had to lose who I believed myself to be. Children grow up, jobs change, people come and go, but being rooted in God will provide the stability none can.

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Hello Fear

By Tikia McGhee

“Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.”

Isaiah 41:10 (NKJV)

What has you fearful? What should you be doing? What have you delayed because of fear? Many times, we are afraid and make excuses for being disobedient to God’s will for our life. When will you speak to your fear(s)?

When will you cast fear aside and step out on faith? So today, I encourage you to stop and acknowledge that you are fearful.

Hello Fear.. you have kept me in this place too long; you have kept me complacent for too long; you have kept anxiety in my heart for too long and you have halted my destiny for too long. Fear will keep you bound; fear will paralyze you; fear will prevent you from launching; fear will keep you from moving forward; fear will stunt your growth and fear will keep you from stepping out. God told us to fear not. If the Bible tells us not to be fearful, then why are we so fearful? Fear has caused the writer in me to be afraid to share my heart and what God was speaking to me. So, today I cast fear aside and decided to launch out. Just as I did today, I encourage you today to take a deep breath and take the first step.

Bible tells us to fear not…Why? Because HE is God, HE will strengthen you; HE will help you and HE will uphold. HE is waiting for you to take the first step. Believe me, I know stepping out is not easy and uncomfortable. If it was easy, then everyone would be taking the first step. It’s okay to step out into the unfamiliar because God is with you and HE promised to never leave you nor forsake you.

Don’t allow fear to keep you bound; don’t allow fear to prevent you from launching; don’t allow fear to keep you from moving forward; don’t allow fear to stunt your growth and don’t allow fear to keep you from stepping out. God has equipped you with everything you need for the next move. Fear is a distraction on life’s journey. Distractions are designed to steer us off the journey. The next time fear wants to creep in, remember that “fear with hinder you, but faith will propel you!”

Lady T

I know that you keep having the conversation with yourself about the things you want to accomplish in life.

I know you want to do God’s will for your life, but you allow fear to stop you. What happened if you stepped out and fulfilled what God has called you to do? The April 2021 PDWMAG.COM 17

I almost gave up!

How to Not Give Up and Stay Committed to Your Purposed Journey CLICK HERE TO WATCH INTERVIEW

Dr. PJ McPhee, the author of I almost gave up, is a retired Social Worker; Child Abuse Investigator, Juvenile Probation Officer, Family Self-Sufficient Counselor, Paralegal, and Adult Protective Investigator, investigating the abuse, neglect, exploitation and self-neglect of Adults. After 22 surgeries, a failed marriage, car accidents, the loss of twins at birth McPhee found herself existing in a whirlwind of pain and frustration while living an unfilled life. Growing up in the church as a “PK” also known as a preacher’s kid, she was a devote Christian who served God with all her heart. But despite her background and service work-life simply had not been fair. Feeling as though God owed her something she decided to write a book sharing her frustrations and how she felt He needed to step up to the plate.

While in her wilderness experience, she soon realized everything she had gone through had a purpose. Her troubles were not about her, but more about the lessons God wanted her to learn. This revelation inspired her to share her story and be an encouragement to others facing the temptation of giving up.

“This book has been written primarily for the person who is hurting, and the enemy has told them that there is no way out,” says Dr. McPhee. “It is critical for you to be aware that it is okay to feel out of touch at times, but also to know you don’t have to face your fears alone. This book comes from the depth of my heart knowing now that we can survive our trials and tribulations one step at a time. This is not a full or complete account, but it depicts a portion of the important ways God protected me and showed His love in ways I did not understand. God still

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There may be delays in your plans that will make it challenging to stay focused and to be honest, it may make you want to give up the project. But this is the time when you have to say, “giving up is not an option.”

Have a Plan: It is impossible to move forward without making the “first step.” Each step becomes a steppingstone to getting you where you want to be. If you notice at times, some walkways are smooth and leveled, but then some have loose gravel and rocks which makes the journey a little more difficult; but not impossible.

Have you noticed that if you’re not a handy person and you try to put something together without going directly by the instructions, for the most part, there are always extra pieces left over? The same goes for your goals and objectives. If you don’t follow the plan, you probably won’t be able to achieve your goals. For me to write my book, I started to journal years in advance, keeping notes and brainstorming for a good title. The first book was finally completed and started with one

chapter at a time. I became inspired and have gratefulness for the unremarkable facets of my life appreciating steps along a rugged path of self-transformation.

Staying Focused: Staying focused all the time isn’t as easy as it sounds.

Originally, there may be delays in your plans that will make it challenging to stay focused, and to be honest, it may make you want to give up the project. But this is the time when you have to say, “giving up is not an option.” Don’t get weary when you have a bad day or get off scheduled because it happens to the best of people; everyone. This is where having a plan comes into play! You can go back, reflect on where you got off track, and then refocus to move forward, accessing and/or re-evaluating the situation. This Provides space to retreat to key factors and recover healing and recovery. Being faced with challenges and changes fosters a sense of greater empowerment. I was riding in the car with a young lady who was driving me to a physician’s appointment, and she was struggling with a problem. I asked her to pull the car over and park, and then I had to look in her rear-view mirror. I asked her, what can you see from looking in the rear-view mirror, and she stated, only what’s behind me. As long as we are looking at what’s behind us, we cannot see a clear view of what’s ahead. You cannot allow yourself to be handcuffed by your past failures! You have to remain focused, driven, and motivated at all times.

Support System: Most importantly, after you have prayed to God for directions, it is equally important that you associate

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with the same-like minded family and friends. In other words, surround yourself with people with similar goals and experiences. I’ve always heard the saying, “if you’re the smartest person in the group, then you’re in the wrong group.

You need to be around someone who challenges you to come up higher. Your support group should always challenge you to be advancing daily and not be stagnant or non-progressive. Realistically, there are going to be some people in your circle that you will have to limit your time with, and then there are some who are a hindrance that you’re going to have to let go altogether!

Positive Self-Talk: Opening the door to believing in yourself starts with being curious about your beliefs. It’s easy to get stuck in nurturing your limiting beliefs, but when you are curious about them, you can begin to be a more positive and purpose-driven “You.” So, what does believing in yourself look like? Well, it’s talking positively to yourself. Using things like positive self-

talk helps to foster positive emotions, thoughts, and actions. Studies say, 80% of your thoughts are negative, and 95% of them are repetitive. Negative thoughts will always come, but they don’t have to stay there. You have the choice to do something about it. I often had to repeat the scripture where David had to encourage himself in the Lord. There were times I did not see or feel God near me, BUT I had to trust and hold on to the faith that He promised to be a present help in time of trouble. There were many nights my pillow was wet with tears but God reassured me that the tears and the floods of water were not to drown me but to wash and cleanse me daily into making me what He wanted me to be.

Self-Love: Sometimes the journey you are on can seem overwhelming and the thought of giving up may cross your mind, but remember that God loves you and has a purpose for you. Then remember that the foundation of believing in yourself is built on being able to love yourself, and all the trials that come with being you. If you cannot love yourself, how can you ever learn to have faith in yourself?

Embrace your values, strengths, and yes...even your weaknesses. It is in your weaknesses and failures where you experience the most growth. So, I say to you, be kind to yourself, as it can create

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a new level of understanding and healing that you will enjoy.

Creating A Healthy Routine: How you start your day can set the tone for the rest of the day. Starting your day with things like prayer, a motivational reading or video, exercise, a nutritious meal...etc are all examples of ways to increase your mood and motivation. A healthy routine can also decrease anxiety and depression and help you focus on core competencies, such as stress reduction, problem-solving, decision making, control of emotions, and more. Not only how you start your day matter, but how you end it as well plays a role. A healthy nighttime routine helps you relax your mind and body from all the things that happened in your day. Examples of ways to wind down may be reading, listening to relaxing music, a hot bath, and proper rest. Set the tone for your day. Do not let it set the tone for you. I send out a text message Monday-Friday to over 300 people to share with them my experiences from day today. This was a tough journey. It is because of all the roadblocks; surgeries; disappointments; family members who abandoned me when I needed them the most, and so forth, that I’m able to write my testimony, and to give God praise. He is the only one who could have helped me not give up and to stay committed to my purposed journey.

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Perseverance Power By: Carleeka Basnight-Menendez

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” Philippians 4:13 (KJV)

What are we talking about PERSEVERANCE….. Despite difficulties, obstacles, and discouragement we have to keep going. The principle of perseverance can be applied to our daily lives, long and short-term goals, and in our businesses. Have you ever felt like everything in your life was going downhill? Or you were being tested on every level and by every devil, but when we look back all we can say is, “Thank you, Jesus, I made it through!”

Even when we feel like we're drowning, God has his hand pulling us up and he will not allow us to sink.

Most times, we quit before the battle is won. When we understand that victory is ours and we have a right to his promises, that’s when we can persevere and keep going and holding on to God’s unchanging hand.

Have you ever watched a sports

game and though one team may be losing badly they keep going, they stay focused, and then the game starts to turn around. They gain some momentum and they say, “hey we can win this!” They encourage their teammates and pick up the pace and keep going.

When we decide to keep running then nothing can stop us. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” Philippians 4:13 (KJV).

In the Kingdom, we win always! 3 key points to perseverance are having clarity about what we are doing and where we are going, being intentional in everything that we do and say, and have faith in God that he is able and willing to do what he said he would do. Be encouraged and stand even in the storm knowing that we have persevering power.

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SHARE MY STORY By: Dr. Cynthia J. Hickman

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A Journey of Duty and Honor Shibbolethia.

My Mother, My, Queen. Our Matriarch The name, as unique, remarkable, and lovely as the lady herself. It came from the Hebrew Biblical word “SHIBBOLETH” found in the Book of Judges 12:6.

Shibbolethia Bryant {Smith} Lewis was born on August 13, 1920, in Shelbyville, Kentucky, the month and year that women were granted the right to vote.

Shibbolethia, my mommy, my queen, the matriarch of our family, at seventy-seven, embraced a new home, leaving Toledo, Ohio, and moving to Missouri City, Texas with hubby and me. I was the daughter, nurse, and caregiver.

Becoming a caregiver was not my choice; it was all in God’s divine plan. Of course, I questioned the plan; in part, because I had three capable sisters who were talented and skilled to handle the role. But God chose me. It became my duty and honor to care for my mother. The twenty-year journey was not without its ups and downs. When mommy was up and about, I continued to work. As the years passed, I found it necessary to quit my job to become a full-time caregiver. I took early retirement on August 13, 2013.

Does this date sound familiar?

As the years progressed, the role of a caregiver is not all about feeding, dressing, bathing, potty-time, and bedtime shenanigans. A huge part of caregiving is communication. You must discuss “What If.” It was essential to have an awareness regarding care needs and personal wishes. While caring for my mother, I promised her several things, and she had a few requests of her own. My promises were she would never see a nursing home, and two, if hospitalized with a terminal condition, I would not prolong life

with cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) or artificial ventilation (intubation). The latter request was mommy’s wishes. We were on the same page.

Confusion and a urinary tract infection landed mommy in the hospital at 96. The final hospitalization was different. She needed intravenous antibiotics and close monitoring due to her age and new kidney worries. Hospitalizations always required family surveillance. The initial night was mine. The next morning, hubby and sister took the day shift, and I came home to shower and nap. The phone rang a few hours after being home. It was my husband screaming mommy was coding, and they put a tube in her throat.

I made it to the hospital in 7-minutes when the hospital was at least 20-minutes away. I later discovered that the admitting nurse failed to ensure the ‘Do Not Resuscitate’ (DNR) and ‘No Code’ orders were on her chart during the admission process. I screamed in anguish! Believe me, when I say God had a plan!

My sisters living in Ohio were informed of the hospital admission. I shared with them that removing life support was a decision mommy made years back.

My sisters traveled to Texas to see mommy, and after much discussion, the day came to remove the tube.

Mommy, at 96-years old, started breathing on her own. She was discharged from the hospital on July 25, 2017. We celebrated her 97th birthday at home in hospice care on August 13, 2017. It was a grand affair with family all around. On Sunday morning, 7-days after her birthday, mommy closed her eyes to this side of heaven. God planned to bring the family together for mommy to see one last time. No matter what our plans are, God’s plan is always best.

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Poetic Purpose

Race

My race does Not determine Wholam My character Does. My Race does Not say that I am a threat My spirit does.

My race does Not say who I am my soul Does. And who Am I? I am a Divine image Of God. I am a human Being

Faith Matters

by Debbie Andrews

W

e all have experience unexcepted circumstances in our lives and adversities happen to build us not hold us in captivity.

But, hearing the diagnosis, “You have Stage 1 Ductal Carcinoma Breast Cancer” resulted in me having so many uneasy emotions. I was literally

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in denial, shock, and disbelief. My subconscious was, “What’s going to happen to me”? “Why is this happening to me? “How do I share the cancer diagnosis with my family members”? Before the diagnosis, I was mentally exhausted from several doctor appointments: an ultrasound, a mammogram, an MRI, and having a needle biopsy. Even though the diagnosis was stage 1, it was still difficult for me to comprehend what I heard from the physician.

Particularly, since I’ve always been very consistent

But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

Isaiah 40:31

with my yearly physicals, mammograms, exercising regularly, and consuming healthy meals. My family history consists of heart disease, diabetics, and yes cancer. Therefore, health and wellness have always been a top priority in my life. Also, as a young adult, I witnessed both my parents endured this dreadful disease many years ago and eventually transitioned to paradise. As I sit in the doctor’s office, I began to wonder how my parents reacted when they heard their cancer diagnosis and suddenly my eyes began to wail in tears.

Shortly after the diagnosis, my physician discussed the surgery and other treatment procedures. This was the beginning of a faith walk, and as a Woman of Faith, I needed to get my mind in the right perspective and prepare myself for the race ahead.

But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. Isaiah 40:31 It’s in those valley experiences that stretch your faith and energized your faith muscles. During my chemotherapy and radiation treatments, I prayed earnestly and meditated on God’s word daily with a spirit of expectancy. I knew God was in the midst of my circumstances and would be healed from breast cancer. I maintained a positive attitude by exemplifying a steadfast and faithful demeanor and continue to press my way with a life of normalcy. I refused to waste energy wavering in misery, anguish, or hopelessness, but I wholeheartedly surrendered to God. I

endured the fiery furnace and lost my hair, but I didn’t lose my faith.

I mentioned to an acquaintance about having my first covid-19 vaccination administered. Their response was “The second vaccine has extremely harmful side effects.”

I unequivocally responded, “Chemotherapy didn’t kill me, surely the vaccine will not kill me either.” Beloved, speak God’s word when facing the storms of life, and declare positive affirmations over yourself. Faith moves God on your behalf. Maintain a stress-free life and surround yourself with folk who will infuse you with positive energy. God has already equipped you to live your best life and has everything in and under control.

Thank God for His divine supernatural healing.

Debbie is a breast cancer survivor, advocate, and author.

She is a speaker on the topic of “Living with and Beyond the Breast Cancer Diagnosis.” She openly and transparently shares her journey to encourage others as they walk through their journey. Debbie incorporates positive affirmations and indomitable faith to survive breast cancer.

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Bitter or Better

By: Dr. Sheila E. Sapp

What do you do when the life you planned and dreamed about ends abruptly? There are no warning signs of this impending breakdown of an almost 19-year marriage. Or were the signs always there and you chose not to see or accept them as the realistic view of the state of your marriage. How many of us have hidden behind the façade of a healthy, fruitful, and productive relationship? We live the lie so masterfully that we believe the false life we are portraying. We fill our lives with other things and tasks to block the feelings of discontent, dissatisfaction, and loneliness that surface periodically from time to time.

So outwardly you appear as the dutiful and faithful loving wife. Your pleasant smile and calming spirit masks doubt and emotional turmoil and uncertainty just beneath the surface on the verge of exploding at any moment.

You tell yourself that trying harder and being more understanding will pave the way to living happily ever after. At least that is what happens in the romantic

fairytales of your childhood. The princess always ends up with Prince Charming and rides off into the sunset.

Then one day you are faced with a situation that you can no longer ignore, block, or deny. He is having an affair. You are now challenged with not only facing the truth but also having to make a choice.. Do you continue to deny and relegate your life to resentment and bitterness? Or do you face the truth of this latest revelation and move on to a better and more fulfilling life?

Finally, after many prayers and introspection moments, I realized I had placed my former husband on a pedestal while putting my desires and goals on the back burner. Also, I did not love who I was as a woman and person. My choice of being better and carving out a better life for myself would involve and require change. It was during this journey that I learned 5 basic principles that led to growth and development.

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