REF REPORT

All ofthe things in sportsthat have pissedme offor havebeendumbas hell

If youhad told me that the impractical jokerswereactually in Brett Maher’s ear duringthis game I would absolutelybelieve you.This manis payed to kick field goals and he missed FOURina rowfrom10 yards, in a playoffgame no less. This man missed onbothsides ofthe uprights, imagine overcorrectingwhenthereis NOWIND.

Dear Brett,

The NFLhas graciously given you little orangethings on topof the goal poststo tell you whenand wherethe windis blowing.Youare allowedto lookat them.If there is no windthen KICKTHE FUCKING BALL.

Sincerely, Someonewhois not a full blowndumbass

No lie I am a little worriedforthis man andhis family. The Dallas Cowboysshouldprobablylookinto protectivecustodyforhim because whenDallas inevitablyloses they will riot

“Our moms smoked Marlboros, and we turned out great!” –Brain Stew editors

POV: Harry Styles the homeless man and y/n

It was a dark and stormy night. Y/n was walking home from the nightshift as a waitress. Her dark blonde, purple, short but not too short, hair that was put into a messy bun was soaked and sticking to her face. Her blue, green, brown, orange, yellow, purple orbs were shining brightly like a cat in the dark stormy night. She clutched her jacket that protected her from the stormy night. She was walking past an alley when she heard the faint sharp inhale coming from it. She turned on her phone flashlight and shone it into the alley. The light hit a tall, olive skinned man, with dark curly hair that fell in his eyes and his green orbs shone bright and wide. His pupils were so huge that y/n could swim in them. “Can’t a man do cocaine in peace?” he exclaimed. Y/n was in love with this homeless man who loved cocaine in alleyways. “Who are you?” Y/n asked. “Harry Styles, love. I used to be famous.” Y/n was shocked she never heard of him. “I’m sorry I’ve never heard of you.” Y/n said. Harry stood up in shock. “I sang As it Was! I was the world’s favorite man!” Y/n tucked a piece of her hair back behind her ear. “I don’t listen to popular music. I’m just not like other girls.” Harry took her hands and made her stare into his bright green orbs. “I think I’m in love with you for that” he said and kissed y/n.