Costa Link Magazine December 08 by paulsnooks

Costa lInk magazine

COVERING COSTA DEL SOL - COAST AND INLAND FROM FUENGIROLA TO SOTOGRANDE

DECEMBER 2008 NO.21 WIN € 200 WITH

See Page 82

Jokes Puzzles Local Info Bar & Restaurant Guide Kids Page What’s On Guide Business Directory

F Glass Curtains S.L.

www.connectinternetcafe.com

E E R

BRITISH BUILDING SUPPLIES

ALHAURIN AUTOS Alhaurin

With over 15 years experience in the UK, we at Alhaurin Autos know how to look after our customers. We will take part exchanges of either English or Spanish vehicles. We even give you cash back if you wish to trade down to a smaller car. We have a fully qualified gestor and will take care of all the legalities for you.

Autos

LEFT HAND DRIVE AUDI A4 2.8, Quattro, FSH, 1998, Immaculate. €9,995 AUDI A4 1.8 TDi 1999, PAS, A/C, E/W, CD/MP3, Leather, VGC €9,995 AUDI A3. 1.9 TDi, PAS, A/C, CD, 1999, Immaculate, €9,995 AUDI A4, 2.5TDi, 6 speed, PAS, A/C 1999 €9,995 PEUGEOT 206, 1.4, 2004, on Spanish plates €4,995 VW GOLF, 1.9 TDi, PAS, A/C, Long I.T.V., 1996 €3,995 SEAT IBIZA, 1.4 petrol, PAS, A/C, CD, New I.T.V. €3,995 MERCEDES E300 TD. AMG, AUTO, PAS, A/C, Leather, Electric pack €9,995 MERCEDES E200 Auto, TD, 1993, PAS, bargain €3,995 FORD FOCUS ESTATE 2 ltr, 6 speed diesel, 2005, PAS, A/C, CD, FSH 140 bhp €11.995 CITROEN XANTIA, 1.9 TDi, 1997, PAS, A/C, Just serviced. €3,995 RENAULT KANGOO 1.9, DCi 65, 2 seater, panel van, 2001, A/C. €4,995 RIGHT HAND DRIVE FORD MAVERICK 4x4 petrol, 1997, A/C, PAS, CD €2,995 DEL BOYS TROTTER INDEPENDENT TRADING VAN, As seen on TV, No plonkers. €3,995 SEAT IBIZA, 1.2 Petrol, 2003, PAS, A/C, CD €4,995 RENAULT MEGANE SCENIC, 1.9 TDi, 2002, PAS, €6,995 ROVER 75 Connoisseur, 2001, Auto, PAS, A/C, Sat Nav, TV, leather €6,995 FIAT ULYSEE, 2LT., JTD, Diesel, PAS, A/C, CD, 7 seats, 2000. €8,995 JEEP CHEROKEE 2.5 TD, PAS, FSH 1997, VGC €5,495, REDUCED TO €3,995 LDV SHERPA 1998, diesel €1,795 MERCEDES C240 ESTATE, blue with beige leather 1999, FSH, PAS, A/C, CD, as new condition €5,995 SSANYONG MUSSO, 4x4, 2.9 CRDi, RHD, UK plates, 2001, X reg, €6,995 4 WHEEL DRIVE SSAYONG REXTON, 2.9 CRDI, Diesel, Auto, 2007, PAS, A/C, CD, Immaculate, 2 years warranty. €24,995 MITSUBUSHI L200 PICK UP, Diesel, 2003, 4 door, PAS, A/C, CD, Immaculate, Bargain €13,995

FORD F150 LARIAT 2006, PAS, A/C, Leather, 5.4 Auto, low Kms.

€27,995

VOLVO C70 CONVERTIBLE, 2001, PAS, A/C, CD, leather interior, only 42,000 kms. €15,995

RENAULT ESPACE INITALE LTD ED. 2001 FULLY LOADED HALF LEATHER, 7 SEATS, C/L, VGC €10,995

MERCEDES E300 3.0L DIESEL. CHOICE OF TWO FROM €6,995

SELECTION OF AUDIS, CHOICE OF FOUR See descriptions on left. €9,995,

MERCEDES E320 CDI Avantguard estate auto.2000, PAS, A/C, CD, Tow bar, Immaculate inside and out €11,995

BMW 840 I. 1996, PAS, A/C, CD, FSH, leather interior, long I.T.V. €9,995

MERCEDES SL 500. 1993, PAS, A/C, CD, removable hard top, immaculate. €13,995

Advert

REDUCED FROM €19,995

We have more stock available, please see our website for a wide selection of LHD, RHD, Commercial, 4x4 and Cabriolets.

www.alhaurin-autos.com Cars bought and sold, cash waiting, immediate decision. Free collection service, best prices paid, Call now! Sunday viewings by appointment.

661 964 014 690 006 175 Email: alhaurinautos@hotmail.com Poligono Industrial La Rosa, Alhaurin el Grande

CITROEN C3, semi auto, 2003. PAS, A/C, CD, FSH,.changes from cabriolet to pick up. €10,995

Nissan X Trail 2.2L DCI Elegance. 2004, PAS, A/C, CD, leather, immaculate. Further reduced €15,995

I.T.V. SERVICE AVAILABLE CAR IMPORTS AND TRANSFERS NOW AVAILABLE

So here we are in the last month of the year and what a year it has been! Quite how we got here so quickly I don’t know, this year truly has flown! Obviously the last Contact Us part of the year has been dominated with news of financial disaster and although we are all of course Tel: aware of the problems I don’t think it needs to be 663 061 669 rammed down our throats quite as much as it has Email: been recently. Besides, although things certainly aren’t sales@costalinkmagazine.com easy out there, we know from our own experience and Website: by reguarly talking with our advertisers that through www.costalinkmagazine.com hard work, dedication and enthusiam businesses of all Deposito Legal: MA-228-2007 types can still thrive and prosper even in the toughest of markets. Remember the Costa Link Magazine Advertising Sales: golden rule ‘Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell 663 061 669 and advertise!” So if you are feeling a little deflated Deadline Date: 15th of each and uninspired at the moment the New year is the permonth. fect opportunity for fresh thinking and new beginnings. No part of this publication, including Enjoy this Christmas, and remember it isn’t all about pictures may be copied, SCANNED, used or reproduced without our prior the presents, it’s a perfect time to spend quality time with family and friends and that doesn’t have to cost written consent. anything! So with all that said we would like to take this Costa Link Magazine accepts no responsibility for alterations to opportunity to thank all of our loyal advertisers and events listed, claims made by our readers for your continued support and wish each and advertisers or information provided everyone of you a very, very Merry Christmas and a by our contributors. Happy, healthy and prosperous New Year. Enjoy!

Inside This Month’s Issue

Bar & Restaurant Guide

What’s On Guide

Puzzles

Jokes Page

Kids Page

40 & 46

to advertise in costa link magazine please call 663 061 669

952 462 092

A W o m a n’s W o r l d How to get that Job To hoom it mae cunsern, I waunt to apply for the job what I saw in the paper. I can Type realee quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting. I think I am good on the phone and I no I am a pepole person, Pepole really seam to respond to me well. Certain men and all the ladies. I no my spelling is not to good but find that I Offen can get a job thru my persinalety. My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth, I can start emeditely. Thank you in advanse fore yore anser. hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr. Sinseerly, BRYAN P.S. Because my resimay is a bit short

below is a pickture of me.

Employer's response: Dear Bryan, It's ok handsome, we’ve got spell check. See you Monday.

Credit Crunch Busting Advertising Advertise on our online Business Directory for a one off payment of only €49 Tel: 663 061 669 or email: info@costalinkmagazine.com

CHRISTMAS FAIR IN AID OF CUDECA SUNDAY 7TH DECEMBER, 12.00pm - 7.00pm HOTEL BARCELO, GUADALMINA ALTA, SAN PEDRO Carol singers, childrens fashion shows from local boutiques, surprise guest singers, wonderful food and gift stalls, but most importantly WE NEED YOU! For more information contact: Jayne Melville: 952 906 865 or Monica Bohman: 952 887 737 websitewww.cudeca.org.

W h a t ’s T h e G o s s Madonna and Guy Update Madonna and Guy Richie have reportedly come to an agreement over the terms of their divorce settlement which was due in court at the end of last month, a formality which the couple did not have to attend! The film director refused to take a penny of the pop star’s cash but wants to share custody of the couple's children, Rocco and David. The children will apparently split their time between Madonna’s New York home and Ritchie’s London pad, (what a settled life they will live!) while Lourdes, Madonna's daughter with Carlos Leon, will continue to live with

her mother. I have two questions regarding this 1) How is it that celebrities do not have to go through the rigmarole of other mere mortals when divorcing, it seems to happen in weeks and they don’t even have to attend their hearing! And 2) I wonder how Lourdes feels about the whole situation, after all she is being taken away from someone who she has reportedly a very good relationship with and someone who has allegedly carried most of the responsibility of childcare within the family. I guess it just goes to show, celebrity or not, it is always very hard on the kids when a marriage breaks down.

Colour 4 Eyes

DISTRIBUTORS WANTED ALONG THE COAST Crazy Eyes available at: Party Party, C.C Los Jarales, Calahonda.

For our complete range of coloured lenses:

Tel: 607 337 383 www.colour4eyes.com Email: info@colour4eyes.com GAME ROOM MARBELLA

www.gameroommarbella.com. Tel: 952 806 178 Calle Juan de Mena 18. Pol. Ind. Estepona 8

All 380 Premiership games LIVE!

Brings you the Best in World Sport

LIVE Rugby, Six Nations

Plasmas / LCD’s

Pto. Paraiso Local 15, Estepona Port.

WORKING ON THE COSTA DEL SOL SINCE 1990

Email: orbitsl@hotmail.com

TEL / FAX: 952 802 457 / 654 758 415

VISIT OUR SHOWROOM OR CALL TO DISCUSS OUR SPECIAL CHRISTMAS OFFERS

Specialists in Community Installations European Golf Tour

PLUS games not on SKY or SETANTA

Sky - Sky + - Sky HD - Freesat

Home Cinema’s and Home Automations Up to 8 LIVE games ALL at ONCE

Suppliers and Installers of:

Home Entertainment SL

O RBIT ORBIT The new home of Premiership Football

CREDIT

Let us help!!!

GET YOUR BUSINESS NOTICED... With a 5m inflatable Airdancer you can’t be missed!

With message or logo 100’s of themes available Custom shapes

Buy Me from just

Hire Me

€3

€18

per day

from just per day

y u B r o e r Hi Unique promotion product portable Easy to inflate Inflates/deflates in seconds Custom designs Low cost Low maintenence Rapid delivery Christmas Airdancers

www.airdancers.es Email: info@airdancers.es

Australian Logic A man in Australia calls his son in London the day before Christmas Eve and says, I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing, forty-five years of misery is enough. “Dad, what are you talking about?” the son screams. “We can't stand the sight of each other any longer,” the father says. “We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Ireland and tell her.” Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. “Like hell they're getting divorced,” she shouts, “I’ll take care of this.'” She calls Australia immediately, and screams at her father, “You are not getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back,

and we’ll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don’t do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?” and hangs up. The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. “Okay,” he says, “they’re coming for Christmas and they’re paying their own way.”

Only in Australia advertising costs less than you think with costa link

Early to bed, Early to rise, Work like hell and

ADVERTISE this size advert for just € 50 a month Call: 663 061 669

please mention costa link when responding to adverts - thank you

CHRISTMAS IS COMING...

INTRODUCING OUR NEW NARCOTIC GAS ALARM

THE MOST LIKELY TIME TO BE BURGLED PROTECT YOURSELF FROM JUST

€195

We've all heard the nightmare stories of families being GASSED and put to sleep then robbed in there own homes. Well not any more the new knock out gas detector alarms as soon as it senses anaesthetic gasses. (Also detects many other gasses)

DON'T BE THE NEXT VICTIM we welcome trade enquiries we welcome trade enquiries we welcome trade enquiries

DRAIN & LEAK SOLUTIONS S.L.

High Pressure water jetting Drain tracing, C.C.T.V. Septic tank problems and installations Bath, sinks and toilets unblocked Leak detection and repairs Fully Qualified, Fully Legal, No Call Out Fee.

Tel: 951 310 111

Mobile: 651 111 005

www.drainandleak.com 14

THE DRIVE IN CAR CARE CENTRE Jardin Botanico. Ctra. N340 Km 200, Mijas Costa Beneath Autos 2002

From

Hand Car Wash €9 Engine Oil & Filter Change From €39

Tyres & Exhausts CALL US FOR A QUOTE

ITV

Preparation & Appointments €99 all included

Don’t Delay Call us Today

610 75 00 76

Email: the-drive-in@hotmail.com

Tommy Cooper Classics So I said to the taxi driver, “King Authur's Close.” He said, “Don’t worry, we’ll lose him at the next set of lights.”

you're calling from.”

I went into this pub, and I ate a ploughman's lunch. He was livid.

“I was cleaning out the attic the other day with the wife. Filthy, dirty and covered with cobwebs... but she’s good with the kids...”

“Sometimes I drink my whiskey neat. Other times I take my tie off and leave my shirt out.”

Two cannibals eating a clown. One says to the other “Does this taste funny to you?”

“My wife and I were fighting like hammer and tongs. She won, she had the hammer.”

Two prostitutes standing on a street corner. One says to the other, “Have you ever been picked up by the fuzz?” The other replies, “No, but I've been swung around by the t*ts a few times!”

“I hurt my back the other day. I was playing piggy back with my 6 year old nephew, and I fell off.” So I rang up my local swimming baths. I said “Is that the local swimming baths?” He said “It depends where

So I rang up a local building firm, I said “I want a skip outside my house.” He said “I'm not stopping you.”

For all you Christmas gifts, cards and wrapping in La Cala

Gorgeous greeting cards for all occasions Unusual giftware Helium balloons and partyware Fantastic prices, Great quality Retail and wholesale available

Come and see for yourself Open Monday - Friday 9.30am - 8pm Saturday 9.30am - 3pm

Tel/Fax: 952 587 549 Three shops away from the Tabac (tobacconist)

en.

op w home o n m o s r i f e site b a tast e o w om t g c e . n i k m o p u c l p s e o d W ne sh pfoo

onli sto e w n e o n . r w u O ww n o k c i Cl

Shop on line and get all your Uk foods and groceries delivered straight to your door. We have thousands of top brand name UK foods from chilled to frozen, tinned foods to cooking sauces, baking products, sweets and snacks, cleaning products to health and beauty all at very competitive prices. Shopping on line could not be easier with our easy to use website and payment options. We even offer free delivery. (See website for details)

We have great price busting special offers every week helping you to save money . Check out our fantastic new range this year of Christmas goodies with a vast range of gift ideas and baking products to make your Christmas a special one this year. Why not check out our store in Los Boliches Fuengirola, 3 streets back from the El Corte ingles roundabout on Avenida de las Salinas near the los boliches train station.

Tel: 951 262 653 info@onestopfoodsuk.com

Calle Torrox Edif Blanca no 3, Los Boliches, Fuengirola. Malaga

Finally you can get a quality wine in bag-in-box packaging in Spain

TRY IT FOR FREE

Free Wine tasting all of November at One Stop Foods UK.

Easy to store - Less space than 4 bottles Easy to keep cold - In the fridge Easy to pour - Tap - open and close Always fresh - No contact with air During 2007 Vi単a Maipo sold 3.653.469 litres in England.

Business cards Single Sided Double Sided 100 22.00 100 37.00 500 +200 Free! 55.00 500 +200 Free! 93.00 1000 + 300 Free! 85.00 1000 + 300 Free! 130.00

Ready in 3 days or less 24h service available

350 gsm matt or gloss

A5 Flyers & A4 Tripticos Single Sided

Double Sided

1000 99.00 1000 130.00 5000 225.00 5000 279.00 10000 285.00 10000 366.00

A4 Tripticos 1000 227.00 5000 370.00 10000 605.00

EYEPRINT strives to conduct business in an ecologically sound manner using 150 gsm gloss EFC Paper

Websites Packs Website Starter Package Your domain name

Website E-commerce Package Your domain name Hosting + databases + PHP scripts Up to15 Email addresses

Hosting

Shopping Cart

5 Email addresses

Online payment

Website Design 6 pages + contact form

Website Design 10 pages + contact form

650€

1450€

We have 1000’s of products, call now for a customised quote

We Print at Eyeprint!

info@eyeprint.es | www.eyeprint.es | www.eyeprint.es/iphone (For your Iphone or PDA)

A M a n’s W o r l d Vegas Baby A man came home from work one day to find his wife on the front porch with her bags packed. “Just where the heck do you think you're going!” said the man. “I'm going to Las Vegas”, said the wife, “I just found out I can get $400 a night for what I give you for free!” The man said, “Wait a minute!” and then ran inside the house only to come back a few minutes later with his suitcases in hand. “Where the heck are you going?” said the wife. The man said, “I’m coming with you. I want to see how you're gonna live on $800 a year!” The Sentence An 80 year old woman was arrested for shop lifting. When she went before the judge he asked her, “What did you

steal?” “A can of peaches” she told the judge The judge then asked her why she had stolen the can of peaches and she replied that she was hungry and needed to feed herself and her husband. The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can. She replied “Just six.” The judge feeling sorry for the old lady thought for a moment and then said, “Then in that case I will give you just six days in jail.” Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment, the woman’s husband spoke up and asked the judge if he could say a few words. The judge said, “What is it? I already feel I have been extremely lenient.” The husband said, “She also stole a can of peas.”

FANTASTIC FUN COME RAIN OR SHINE

THE NEWEST & MOST EXCITING TOUR ON THE COAST buggy safari

MARBELLA MALAGA COSTA DEL SOL

Reservations: 952 83 36 64 651 05 35 18 20

NEW & SECOND HAND BUGGIES FOR SALE

Web: www.buggysafarimarbella.com

No 1 Cars Marbella

IDEALLY SITUATED IN MARBELLA POLIGONO ALL MAKES OF CARS FREE VALET WITH SERVICE AND REPAIRS AIR CON SERVICE AND RE-GAS OIL CHANGE WHILE YOU WAIT

SERVICING AND REPAIRS FULL DIAGNOSTIC REPAIRS FREE PICK UP AND DELIVERY SERVICE FROM €85 BENALMADENA TO ESTEPONA PRE I.T.V. INSPECTIONS ACCIDENT DAMAGE REPAIR I.E. PAINTING ETC. MOTORBIKE AND SCOOTER REPAIRS Email: no1carsmarbella@gmail.com 45 Calle Uranio, Poligono Industrial La Ermita, 29600 Marbella

IO CALLE DEL A LUMIN

C. MERCURIO C. DE COBRE

RANIO CALLE U

Tel: 952 926 544

POLIGONO INDUSTRIAL LA ERMITA

CALLE GRANITO

C. DEL CARBON FUENGIROLA

CALLE ZINC ESTEPONA N340

Fast Broadband Internet and Telephone Service Provider No contract or landline required

Call 952 932 266

info@Y-Internet.com

www.Y-Internet.com

Surf by day, week or month Access at home or local hotspots Free site survey Monthly connection from €15pm Full Residential Wi-Fi installation from €175

Enjoy a Funny Five Minutes David Beckham arrives home one day to find Victoria (Posh Spice) all sweating, flushed and breathless. He rushes over to her and ask's if she is alright. Posh stutters a reply “I’m er, er...I’m having a heart attack” “Oh no” he cries in despair. “I’ll call an ambulance.” He runs downstairs, picks up the phone and begins dialling 999. However, he is stopped in his tracks by a tearful Brooklyn. “What’s the matter, son?” asks Becks. “Uncle Giggsy is in the wardrobe with no clothes on Daddy!” sniffles Brooklyn. Infuriated by this, Beckham runs upstairs and kicks down the wardrobe door. Sure enough, the carpet-chested Welshman is stood there, starkers. “You w**ker Giggsy!” screams Becks. “My wife is right over there having a heart attack, and you're running around naked scaring the sh*t out of Brooklyn.”

A journalist interviews Sir Paul McCartney: “So, Sir Paul, do you think that you will ever go down on one knee again?” Sir Paul replies “I’d prefer it if you called her Heather.” A man appeared before St. Peter at the pearly gates. “Have you ever done anything of particular merit?” St. Peter asked. “Well, I can think of one thing” the man offered. “Once, on a trip, I came upon a gang of bikers who were threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn’t listen. So, I approached the largest and most heavily tattooed biker and smacked him on the head, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground. I yelled, ‘Now, back off!’ or you’ll answer to me!” St. Peter was impressed, “When did this happen?” “Just a couple of minutes ago.”

please mention costa link when responding to adverts - thank you

PARKER SOL PROPERTIES & COSTALETS Tel: 952 56 39 39 / 636 829 631 www.costalet.com C/ Sagitario 6, Jardines de Gamonal Blq 7, 29631 Arroyo de la Miel C.I.F: B-92171388

ONE OF THE BEST KNOWN AND MOST SUCCESSFUL RENTAL AGENTS AND REAL ESTATE COMPANIES IN BENALMADENA IS NOW OPERATING IN CALAHONDA. IF YOU WISH TO SELL, BUY OR RENT LONG TERM FROM EL FARO TO ELVIRIA, CALL US NOW. CALAHONDA AREA SALES 2 BED APARTMENT IN MIRAFLORES, PARKING, CLOSE TO GOLF 185,000€ UPPER CALAHONDA. LARGE 2 BED LUXURY APARTMENT, 110 SQM. BRAND NEW, FULLY FURNISHED, INCLUDES PARKING AND STORE ROOM.199,000€ MIRAFLORES 3 BED LUXURY. SEMI DETACHED TOWNHOUSE IN A SMALL EXCLUSIVE DEVELOPMENT, PARKING, CLOSE TO GOLF. BEAUTIFUL HOME 365,000€

CALAHONDA AREA RENTALS 1 BED IN TORRENUEVA. GROUND FLOOR, PART FURNISHED. CLOSE TO SHOPS, RESTAURANTS & BEACH. GREAT VALUE. 600€ PCM UPPER CALAHONDA. 2 BED/ 2 BATH APARTMENT WITH PRIVATE PARKING. BIG TERRACE AND STUNNING VIEWS. AMAZING VALUE 800€ PCM

THESE ARE JUST A SMALL SELECTION OF OUR STOCK. CALL NOW FOR THE PROPERTY OF YOUR CHOICE Decreto 218/2005. All the properties shown are built. A ficha informative will be given at viewings or immediately afterwards. All prices include 5% commission. All properties are liable to 7% IVA, approx. 2% notary & registration fees, and 1% solicitors fees. A nota explicative is available showing all costs, upon request. The information shown is valid until the 31st December 2008. None of the details shown form part of any contract but are for illustration and information only.

Designer and Character Childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Clothing and Toys Including: Oshkosh, Timberland, Juicy, Ralph Lauren, High School Musical, Dora the Explorer, Thomas the Tank Engine and much more...

Opening Saturday 22nd November Urb Jardin Botanico 19

Tel: 952 493 086 Email: koolkidzspain@gmail.com

The brightest ideas in home refurbishment Complete renovations from design to build Kitchens Bedrooms Bathrooms PVCu Windows and Doors

glps Builders of Distinction Tel: +34 952 467144 Web: www.glps.eu Email: info@glps.eu

For Sale British supermarket for sale in Coin

u 240 square meters u Plenty of easy parking u 126 rented Mailboxes, which brings in a revenue of just over €7300. (per annum)

u €100,000 worth of stock (trade) u 8 years on the rental lease remaining u Includes all fixtures and fittings (trolleys, baskets, pallet truck, epos-scanning till for stock control, shelving, fridges, freezers etc.)

Price: €165,000 For more details please telephone:

(0034) 951 315 128

FOUNDATION FOR ABANDONED AND MISTREATED ANIMALS

952 450 487

CALL: 663 061 669 www.thedepot-andaluciafreight.com 26

Luisa Approx. 2 year-old female mixed breed. Luisa has a very kind, loving character. She adores being with people and has no problems with other dogs. Reaction to cats unknown. F.A.M.A. is a foundation set up and funded solely by voluntary contributions to provide an acceptable standard of life to the abandoned animals whilst in its care: A clean and safe living environment A regular and nutritional diet Veterinary care when needed. To ensure that ALL adopted animals comply with current legislation: Spaying/ Castration, micro chipping, vaccinations etc. To match (via adoption) animals with suitable owners. For more information visit their website: www.f-a-m-a.net or contact Pat Coleman. Mobile: 620 354 885.

GREAT VALUE ADVERTISING 1/8 page advert only €25 A MONTH BUSINESS SERVICES Company Formations from €750 Business Valuations Business Start up Sole proprietors (autonomo) Bookkeeping from €55 per month Malcolm Greenwood

Tel: 952 59 69 27

AirtechAC FOR THE PERFECT CLIMATE, ALL YEAR ROUND QUALITY HEATING AND AIR-CONDITIONING UNITS AT COMPETITIVE PRICES FULL INSTALLATION SPECIALIST KNOWLEDGE AND COMPLETE SERVICE AND MAINTENANCE RANGE OF SERVICES FOR COMMERCIAL CUSTOMERS. Finca Dorada 5, El Chaparral, Mijas Costa Phone: +34 952 599 019 or +34 607 793 923

www.airtechacspain.com info@airtechacspain.com

Christmas Crackers W

hy is Christmas just like a day at the office ? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

he three wise men arrived to visit the child lying in the manger. One of the wise men was exceptionally tall, and bumped his head on the low doorway as he entered the stable. “Jesus Christ!” he shouted. Joseph said, “Write that down, Mary; it's better than Clyde!”

he president of the Festive Foods Corporation was included in a papal audience and he took the opportunity of making a business proposition to the Pope; that if he could arrange for the Lord's Prayer to be changed from “Give us this day our daily bread” to

“Give us this day our daily turkey” throughout the whole of Advent and Christmas the Festive Foods Corporation in exchange would give £20 million to Catholic charities. The Pope declined his offer. A few weeks later the man called the Pope and upped the offer to £50 million but once again it was turned down. A few weeks before the beginning of Advent the man came back to the Pope with an astonishing offer of £100 million. The Pope considered all the good work that could be done with such a large amount of money and decided to go ahead. The next day he called a special meeting of the Cardinals to let them know about the situation. “Well” said the Pope. “I have good news and bad news. The good news is that we are to receive

REPAIR

OF POOL LEAKS

POOL REFORMS RE-TILING MARBLE

SUMMER OFFERS

SURROUNDS & PLUMBING PUMPS AND FILTERS CHEMICALS TERRACES AND PATIOS PUBLIC AND SEMI PUBLIC POOLS REFORMED TO COMPLY WITH THE NEW SPANISH REGULATIONS

8 x 4 m pool: All incl. only 15,800€...and you get a free INOX shower and

MD SYSTEMS S.L.

ELECTRICS

dolphin tile image for your pool.

10 x 5 m pool: All incl. only 17,950€...and you get a free INOX shower and two pool lights with remote control.

or 952 59 67 64

12 x 6 m pool: All incl. only 21,800€...and you get a free INOX shower and two LED lights. Lights change through 10 different colours on 10 different sequences.

Tel: 647 95 47 81

All Pools Guaranteed for 7 Years!

C/Puerta de la Villa 1, Alhaurin el Grande.

Christmas Crackers £100 million. The bad news is that we have lost the Hovis account.”

n Christmas morning, a policeman on horseback was sitting at a traffic light, and next to him was a kid on his shiny new bike. The policeman said to the kid, “Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?” The kid said, “Yeah.” The policeman said, “Well next year, tell Santa to put a tail light on that bike.” The cop then proceeded to issue the kid a €20.00 bicycle safety violation ticket. The kid took the ticket. Before he rode off he said, “By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?” Humoring the kid, the policeman said, “Yeah, he sure

did.” The kid said, “Well next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top.”

hree men die in a car accident on Christmas Eve. They all find themselves at the pearly gates waiting to enter heaven. On entering they must present something ‘Christmassy’. The first man searches his pocket and finds some mistletoe, so he is allowed in. The second man presents a cracker, so he is also allowed in. The third man pulls out a pair of knickers. Confused at this last gesture, St. Peter asks, “How on earth do these represent Christmas?” The third man answered “They’re Carol’s.”

VxÄxuÜtà|ÉÇá

`tÜuxÄÄt

Professional Party Planning Want something exciting this Christmas? Celebrations are ready to work their magic and create something really special for you this year. Party this festive season theVxÄxuÜtà|ÉÇá `tÜuxÄÄt way. Professional Party Planners that know how to make your occasion memorable. For further information call today:

+34 670 526 561 / +34 666 584 132 celebrationsmarbella@hotmail.com www.freewebs.com/celebrationsmarbella

Unforgettable

Vibrant

Special

Extraordinary

Trade and Public Welcome FREE HAMMER WITH THIS ADVERT WHEN YOU SPEND OVER €100

Teak & Softwood Decking Cuprinol Woodcare Products Creosote Wall Ties & Wall Starters Marshalltown Brick & Plaster Trowels Coving Joist Hangers Power Tools Fence Panels Patio Seal Kids Playhouses Made To Measure

Roofing Felt Feather Edge Fencing Door Liners Brick Reinforcement Bitumen D P C Ready Mixed Tile Adhesive Dust Sheets Rubble Sacks Sheds Thistle Multi-Finish

Delivery to all areas

Open 8am - 5.30pm Monday to Friday. Saturday 8am -1pm Las Chapas Poligono, Elviria, Marbella Tel: 952 835 172 www.britishbuildingsuppliesinspain.com

AIM

BRITISH BUILDING SUPPLIES

LCOME YO L WE U

BUTIPLAYA LA CALA

(Behind Sunshine Golf) FRESH FOOD COOKED DAILY Daily specials, All to eat in or take away Authentic Indian recipes Fish and Chips with mushy peas Traditional Sunday Roast, served all day OPEN MON - FRI 5PM TILL LATE SAT AND SUNDAY 1PM TILL LATE TEL: 607 622 091 OR 645 233 320

Cala Bella

All English and Dutch football and main sporting events shown. Open Mon - Fri 5pm till late. Sat - Sun 2pm till late. Tel: 952 494 550. Calle Torremolinos, La Cala.

Food served 10am -10pm. Sunday Lunch 1pm - 9pm. Thursday quiz night, Friday darts league, Saturdays Karaoke. La Cortijera. La Cala.

(rubber surface) Open from 10am for food monday to saturday

The Sussex Bar

Home made sunday lunches served from 11am-10pm Las Adelfas No.11 Urb. Los Claveles

Tel: 952 493 763

bars and restaurant guide

U PA

E TH

Wednesdays and Fridays, Xmas Party nights with 3 course meal (incl Traditional Xmas meal) for only €24.50 - Upgrade to free Wine & Draught beer for €40 plus 3 course meal plus entertainment. Vista del Mar, beachside Miraflores. New Years Eve - a few tables left Martin Joseph & Dave Lee aka Frank & Deano with 4 course meal, cava & canapes on arrival plus free bar €150. Vista del Mar, beachside Miraflores. THE BEAT Radio Xmas Party. - 6th Vista del Mar. Beachside Miraflores. News Years Eve Party Shenanigans, Riviera del Sol. New Years Eve Party - Lil’ Rob’s Karaoke and Disco plus great views of fireworks. El Zoco, Calahonda.

AN DY

Christmas

Great places to eat and drink in La Cala

W h a t ’s O n T h i s

EVERY FRIDAY 7.30 till 10.30 - Teenage Disco 16yrs and under € 5 membership EVERY FRIDAY/SAT — Live- The Best of Costa Del Sol D.J.s (See facebook for details.) FREE SHOTS B4 12 O’CLOCK

NEW SHOWROOM ON THE N340 NEAR LA CALA DE MIJAS. EST. 8 YEARS, FULL WARRANTY & SERVICE NO ITEM TOO SMALL

www.grupocaterquip.com TEL/FAX: 952 493 636 or MOBILE: 605 411 881 - 637 546 978

Sandi

OPEN FOR BREKFAST, LUNCH AND OUR NEW BAR-CAFE NOW OPEN EVENINGS FOR TAPAS. BREAKFASTS, FRESHLY BAKED BAGUETTES AND CROISSANTS, SANDWICHES AND ROLLS WITH DIFFERENT FILLINGS DAILY. DAILY LUNCHTIME SPECIALS, KEBABS, MEXICAN CHICKEN, SPECIALITY SALADS, LAVAZZA COFFEE, MILKSHAKES, FUSION TEAS, EVENING DRINKS. ENJOY ‘AL FRESCO’ ON OUR SUNNY TERRACE OR INSIDE OUR NEW BAR-CAFE. DAYTIME MENU AVAILABLE UNTIL 5.00PM Local 26 Jardín Botánico, La Cala de Mijas Open from 8.00am. Tel: 952 493 184

HONG KONG

CHI ESE RESTAURA T

Takeaway. Fresh Baguettes, Paninis, Pies, Kebabs, Burgers and Pastries. Mon - Sat 11.30 - 15.30 and 18.30 - 22.30 C/Torremolinos, La Cala. Tel: 618 181 507

Numero Uno

SPECIAL LUNCHTIME MENU 12PM - 4PM STARTERS Spring Roll, Special Salad, Chicken and Sweetcorn/Tomato/Hot and Sour Soup or Spare Ribs.

MAIN COURSE

Beef with Blackbean/Oyster/Chinese Mushroom and Bamboo/Curry or Chicken with Cashew Nuts/Sweet and Sour/Curry or Prawns with Vegetables or Sweet and Sour Fish (Hake)

RICE AND NOODLES

Special House Fried Rice, Boiled Rice or Noodles with Soya Bean Sprouts or Chips

DESSERTS By the tower in La Cala. Friendly atmosphere, helpful staff. Internet Wi-Fi Fed Ex. Office services. Open 9.00am - 7.00pm. Tel: 952 58 77 62

Coffee, Tea, Ice Cream, Cream Caramel or Fruit Main restaurant serving usual delicacies 6pm - 12pm

Jardin Botanico, Local 16, La Cala de Mijas. Tel: 952 599 236. Mob: 685 578 743

bars and restaurant guide

Great places to eat and drink in La Cala

COMMERCIAL CATERING EQUIPMENT NEW & SECONDHAND FURNITURE, DESIGNER/BUDGET, INDOOR/OUTDOOR & MODULAR SEATING FULL PROJECT MANAGEMENT EXTRACTION/ REFRIGERATION ITALIAN DESIGNER BARS STAINLESS STEEL FABRICATION

Tel: 952 932 519 41 & 42, 1ST FLOOR CENTRO COMMERCIAL LOS JARALES, CALAHONDA

Harrys Sports Bar

Advertise Your Bar Or Restaurant Here For Just €20 A Month. Tel: 663 061 669

Los Jarales

THURSDAY KARAOKE 8.30pm SATURDAYS CABARET 8.30pm

All live sports and premiere league football. Six TV’s and big screen. Full menu, Sunday roast and homemade tapas. Large sun terrace. Open 10amlate, seven days a week. Upstairs Los Jarales.

Sit ‘n’ Go

Sisters Bar

Sit ‘n’ Go sports lounge broadcasting all the weekly action in comfortable, friendly surroundings. Open daily from 1pm until midnight. Wi-fi internet access. Frontline C.C.Calypso.

Friendly family bar with good food, tapas, live entertainment, karaoke and sports. Open seven days a week. The Strip, Calahonda Tel: 952 939 579

Calahonda

great places to eat and drink Calypso

Play world famous Texas Holdʼem Poker. From beginners to pros, we have games to suit everyone

ALL LIVE SPORTS SHOWN ON TWO LARGE SCREENS FOUR LIVE MATCHES ON SATURDAYS FULL MENU AVAILABLE TILL LATE SUNDAY LUNCH 2 COUSES €8 BREAKFAST SPECIAL €5 FRESHLY MADE TAPAS FOR BOOKINGS CALL: 952 935 568 C.C Los Jarales, Mijas Costa

Los Jarales

Sports - Cafe Bar

great places to eat and drink

THE PIT STOP

Villa Paradiso - Open since 1989

Small friendly bar. Daily sport. Karaoke on Tues and Thursday. All football matches shown. First floor El Zoco (corner) Tel: 952 935 340

Italian Restaurant

Italian restaurant. Taste the genuine Italian food in attractive decor. Open seven days a week, 1pm till late. C.C. El Zoco, first floor, Sitio de Calahonda. Tel: 952 932 042

Curry Crazy

Trafalgar Cocktail Bar

Indian Restaurant. Take away and delivery. Only natural herbs and spices, no additives, no colour. Open 7pm until late Mon - Sat. El Zoco Tel: 952 934 909

For before and after dinner drinks. Live music Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Open every evening until late. El Zoco First floor, Sito de Calahonda. Mijas Costa.

The

BOAT HOUSE

Mijas Costa’s Premier Fish and Chips Restaurant and Take Away Excellent Quality Fish and Chips Large portions Enjoy your meal in our large fully air-conditioned restaurant or outside ‘al fresco’ on our large terrace Large selection of desserts

OPE EVERY IGHT 6.00 - 10.00 ABOVE SUPERSOL, C.C. EL ZOCO, CALAHO DA

TEL: 952 930 148

bars and restaurant guide

great places to eat and drink El Zoco, Calahonda

Fools Bar

New Years Eve Party Disco and Karaoke 9 till late and best seats in the house for New Years Eve Fireworks

Happy ‘2’ hours every Saturday 4pm - 6pm Karaoke Every Saturday. 9pm - 12pm

Chill Out Lounge Bar. Good Atmosphere, Good Music, Good Times. Tel: 666 834 616 Open everyday. Top floor El Zoco. Calahonda

Things That Make You Go Mmmm Quick Christmas Pudding Can be make very shortly before Christmas.

Ingredients

50 g fresh wholemeal or white breadcrumbs 1 beaten egg 50 g self-raising flour 1 level teaspoon mixed spice 225 g mincemeat 1 tablespoon milk 1 level tablespoon dark treacle Method

1. Add crumbs to egg in bowl. 2. Sieve the flour and spice and add the mincemeat, milk and treacle. Mix well. 3. Spoon into a greased 600 ml basin, cover with greased greaseproof paper

Cockles

and a layer of foil, tucking edges round rim of basin. 4. Place on u p t u r n e d saucer in pan with boiling water halfway up basin. (Or, use a steamer which will give you a lighter pudding). 5. Steam for 4 hours. Keep water on boil, refill with boiling water when necessary. Or pressure cook following instructions given in your pressure cooker manual. The pudding can be eaten now or kept a week or so. If it is kept until another day ,steam it then for 1 hour. Serves: 4.

Win a meal for 2

English Seafood Tapas Bar

Fuengirola

Fuengirola Port

Vista del Mar are offering Costa Link readers the chance to win a meal for two up to the value of â&#x201A;Ź50 at their fantastic restaurant, situated at Beachside Miraflores.

Everything Direct from Billingsgate Market London EAT IN OR TAKE AWAY

Pie, Mash and Liquer Jellied Eels Dressed Crab Whelks Peeled Prawns and much more...

Parties catered for Tel: 672 028 226

CLMÂŠ2008

Orders now being taken for Christmas and New Year. Open Tues - Sun 11am - 7pm

To win all you have to do is answer the following question: What nights are Vista del Mar holding their Christmas party nights? Email your answer to: info@costalinkmagazine.com Call or text : 663 061 669

W h a t ’s O n Mondays Quiz and Bingo - Shenanigans, Riviera del Sol. Film Nights - 9.30pm, Bunkers Bar Bistro, Miraflores Driving Range.

Tuesdays Quiz Night - 9.30, Bunkers Bar Bistro, Miraflores Driving Range. Karaoke - Fools bar. El Zoco, Calahonda.

Wednesdays Strictly Come Dancing - Dancing Lessons. 2pm Shenanigans, Riviera del Sol. Steak Night - 5.30 - 9.45, Bingo and Quiz 10pm. Bunkers Bar Bistro, Miraflores Driving Range.

Thursdays

Riviera del Sol & Miraflores

Steak Night - with Gary Young. Eat as

much as you can for €25 Vista del Mar. Beachside Miraflores. Quiz night - JJ’s Bar, Riviera del So.l Quiz Night - Sussex Bar, La Cala. Karaoke - Fools Bar, El Zoco, Calahonda. Karaoke - Sisters Bar, The Strip, Calahonda.

Fridays Karaoke - “Paul the Bear” Shenanigans, 9.30pm Riviera del Sol. Darts League - Sussex Bar, La Cortijera, La Cala. Live Music - Trafalgar Bar, El Zoco. Fish and Chip Night - The Far Isle, Riviera del Sol. Fish Shop Night - 5.30 - 9.45 Bunkers Bar Bistro, Miraflores Driving Range.

Continued on page 46

Light snacks, baguettes and sandwiches, fresh Lavazza coffee, selection of beers and wines.

NEW WINTER PRICE LIST. Offex pick up point Mobile phone top ups. Internet cafe. Open from 10am - 10pm 7 days a week. Tel: 952 930 844 www.connectinternetcafe.com Top of Riviera del Sol, Las Terrazas de Miraflores. (round the corner from Miraflores supermarket.)

great places to eat, drink and be entertained

Your Entertainment Guide

Come and enjoy the delightful ambience of this fine Indian restaurant situated in the Torrenueva Urbanisation, Near La Cala. With our premier Indian chef preparing cuisine from all different regions of India whilst also cooking his own specialties. For example: Kadhai Goshi Bussainy - Pieces of lamb in a mild sauce Handi - Meat or fish with onion, tomato, peppers and a special spicy sauce Chicken Pasanda - Marinated chicken fillets in mild sauce stuffed with spices. Restaurant and Take Away

Open 7 nights a week 6.00 - 12.00

Tel: 902 463 426 IND IAN CLMÂŠ2008

Come and Enjoy the Relaxing Atmosphere of Browns BBQ and Grill Over looking the Mediterranean on the main roundabout at Riviera Nr. Calahonda. FANCY A PARTY IN Succulent Ribs NOVEMBER OR DECEMBER WITH THE Spit Roast Chicken RESTAURANT TO YOURSELVES? Prime Steaks Pork Chops ANY PARTIES OF 25 OR MORE YOU CAN SELECT YOUR OWN MENU AND HAVE THE Lamb Cutlets Grilled Fish PRIVACY OF YOUR OWN RESTAURANT. Or delve into Pie Corner ALSO CHRISTMAS PARTIES. Sunday Carvery 2.00 - 9.00 1st & 2nd course €15,95 Main course €11,95 Open 7 days a week Restaurant and Take Away 6.00PM - 10.30PM Tel: 902 276 967 902 BRO WNS CLM©2008

Golden Sun

Bunkers Bar Bistro

Traditional Chinese Food. Takeaway menu. Open 12.00-16.00 and 18.30-24.00 everyday. Riviera Commercial. Tel: 952 931 737

Breakfast, brunches and evening dinner. Open 7 days a week from 10am. Internet connection. Terrace available for private functions. Miraflores Driving Range. Tel: 952 939 381

En Un Rincon De La Boca

Specialists in Argentinian grilled meat. Take away. Open daily 10.00 - 23.00. Closed Tuesdays. Las Terrazas de Miraflores Tel: 952 930 649

Advertise Your Bar Or Restaurant Here For Just â&#x201A;Ź20 A Month. Tel: 663 061 669

bars and restaurant guide

CLMÂŠ2008

Great places to eat and drink in Riviera del Sol & Miraflores

Family Bar ty s Eve Par r a e Y w Internet e N Quizzes and Karaoke Live Entertainment Pool Tables Games Machines Open for Food Closed Tuesdays Beachside, Riviera del Sol Tel: 952 935 676

JJ’s Bar

Charley’s Cafe & Bar

RIVIERA DEL SOL UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT Open all day and evenings. Newly reburbished. Sunday roast 12pm - 9pm 2 courses €10. Tel: 615 315 605

Papa Luigi

SMALL COSY BAR WITH LARGE SUNNY TERRACE AND FANTASTIC VIEWS OVER THE MED. LIVE SPORT FUN QUIZ NIGHTS - THURS MUSIC NIGHTS Avenida del Golf

Traditional Italian food. Fresh pasta, wood burning pizza oven, Open every day 12 - 11. Riviera Commercial, Tel: 952 934 496

Riviera del sol JJ’s Bar

Great places to eat and drink in Riviera del Sol & Miraflores

Beautiful Panoramic Sea and Beach Views From The Terrace Freshly Cooked Versatile Menu. Warm Friendly Atmosphere. ‘Winter Early Bird’ Teas. Christmas Menu Bookings. Above Shenanigans, Beachside, Riviera del Sol Tel: 952 935 039. Closed Tuesdays.

bars and restaurant guide

Saturdays

Cont. from page 40

Your Entertainment Guide Sundays

Come to the Cabaret - 13th Gary Young It's Only Rock 'n' Soul Night. 20th The Return of Peng Motown & Stevie Wonder Night. 27th Amanda Rosa with hits from the West End. Vista del Mar. Beachside Miraflores. Cabaret - Michelle Allan 9.30pm Shenanigans, Riviera del Sol. Karaoke - Lilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Robs, Top floor El Zoco, Calahonda. Traditional Pie, Mash and Liquer during the day, Karaoke in the evening. Sisters Bar, The Strip, Calahonda. Live music - Trafalgar bar, El Zoco, Calahonda. Mixed Grill Night - 5.30 - 9.45 Bunkers Bar Bistro, Miraflores Driving Range.

Sunday Lunch - 1 till 6 with Gary Young on vocals, 2 till 5. Vista del Mar. BBQ - 6pm - 9.30 Bingo and Quiz 10.00pm, Bunkers, Miraflores Driving Range.

MBC Internet Cafe

All day Breakfasts, Lunches + Snacks Fax + Photocopying Mon-Fri 9am - 7:30pm Sat 10am-2pm Marbella Business Centre Elviria Tel 952 850 052

Elviria

great places to eat, drink and be entertained.

W h a t â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s O n

BEAT THE EXCHANGE RATE! PAY IN POUNDS

ESTABLISHED 1987 Email: fortress@telefonica.net www.fortresssecurityspain.com RELIABILITY AND SERVICE QUALITY AND WORKMANSHIP GUARANTEED

PHONE 952 931 128 OR 952 933 234

Puzzle It Out

Solutions on page 82

Quick Crossword Across

1.Eternal (9) 6.Water barrier (3) 7.Precious gem (7) 9.Mistake (5) 10.One of the senses (5) 12.Expert (3) 13.Beer mug (5) 14.Score (5) 16.Very old (7) 18.Self (3) 19.Stage name (9)

Down 1.Military chaplain (5) 2.Compunction (7) 3.Survival (9) 4.Fifth sign of the zodiac (3) 5.Emblem (5) 8.Tried (9) 11.Physician (7) 13.Frighten (5) 15.Tempest (5) 17.Drinking vessel (3)

I can flutter and take your breath away. I can take a beating, but do not bruise. If I stopped you would be sure to lose. Everyday I am with you. What am I?

Picture Puzzles

Sudoku

Can you spot the twelve differences?

Say What You See...

Final 5,4,3,2,1 48

smupoke

to sponsor this page please call: 663 061 669

Christmas Double Entendres Things which sound rude at Christmas See how many you can slip in to the conversation this Christmas! “Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.” “Smother the butter all over the breasts.” “How long do I beat it before it's ready?” “Wow, that’s one terrific spread.” “Talk about a huge breast!” “Breast or leg?” “I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.” “Do you want stuffing?” “Don't play with your meat.” “Are you ready for seconds?”

n ligatio No ob n tio quota

“More meat darling?” “That's the biggest bird I've ever had!” “If I don't undo my trousers, I'll burst.” “I'm so full up; I've been gobbling nuts all morning” “Do you want me to put some cream on your pudding?”

News Flash Until further notice BA has halted all flights to and from the UK. BA announced: “I ain’t going on no plane you crazy fool.” Share Costa Link with your friends around the World! Full magazine online at www.costalinkmagazine.com

New Showroom La Cala de Mijas

Tailor made furniture packages & make over solutions

Are you struggling for ideas, time or patience for your property? Take the stress out of what should be a wonderful new phase in your life. New or existing properties, we can help you. Call Dilys for a no-obligation quotation, from dressing one window to a whole furniture package. Our showroom is situated between the BP petrol station and the Farmacia, next door to Sr. Nick’s. Tel/Fax: 952 494 155. Dilys: 600 583 673. Juliette: 678 539 365 Web: www.whitedesignco.com. Email: info@whitedesignco.com CLM©2008

We would like to wish all our customers a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year

Ladys Shop All Designer Handbags Fashion Accessories All Ladys clothing from Footwear to Exclusive T-Shirts at Silly Prices Opposite B.P. Garage La Cala Next door to Snack Attack Tel: 952 493 455

Jackies

HIGH CLASS CLOTHING ALTERATION SERVICE AND MADE TO MEASURE GARMENTS SPECIALISING IN BRIDAL WEAR AND EVENING WEAR NOW SUMMER HAS GONE IT’S TIME TO START THINKING OF CHRISTMAS OUTFITS AND BALLGOWNS.

WHY NOT GIVE JACKIE A CALL, WITH 45 YEARS DRESSMAKING EXPERIENCE I PROMISE YOU’RE IN GOOD HANDS AND YOU WON’T BE DISSAPOINTED.

PERPHAPS THIS YEAR YOU WOULD LIKE SOMETHING A BIT SPECIAL MADE TO YOUR OWN DESIGN OR MAYBE YOU COULD GET LAST YEARS LITTLE NUMBER RE-DESIGNED.

FOR MORE INFORMATION CALL JACKIE ON: (0034) 952 493 505 (0034) 666 502 004 JACKIEHEYS@YAHOO.CO.UK

LUGAR GALARIAS PANIAGUA, LOCAL 12, AVENIDA PANIAGUA, SOTOGRANDE 11311 SAN ROQUE, CADIZ.

Lawyers... A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural Saskatchewan in Canada. He shot and killed a duck, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, “I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it.” The old farmer replied, “This is my property, and you are not coming over here.” The indignant lawyer said, “I am one of the best trial attorneys in Canada and, if you don't let me get that duck, I’ll sue you and take everything you own. The old farmer smiled and said, “Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes in Saskatchewan. We settle small disagreements like this, with the Saskatchewan Three Kick Rule.” The

Not the most popular of people lawyer asked, “What is the Saskatchewan Three Kick Rule?” The Farmer replied, “Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up.” The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom. The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work boot into the lawyer’s groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer’s last meal gushing from his mouth. The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer’s third kick to his rear end sent him face-first into a fresh cow pat. Continued. overleaf...

Lawyers... The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, “Okay, you old coot. Now it's my turn.” The old farmer smiled and said, “Naw, I give up. You can have the duck.” A truck driver used to amuse himself by running over lawyers he would see walking down the side of the road. Every time he would see a lawyer walking along the road, he would swerve to hit him, and there would be a loud ‘THUMP’ and then he would swerve back on the road. One day, as the truck driver was driving along he saw a priest hitch hiking. He thought he would do a good turn and pulled the truck over. He asked the priest, “Where are you going, Father?” “I’m going to the church five miles down the road!” replied

Not the most popular of people the priest. “No problem Father. I'll give you a lift. Climb in the truck.” The happy priest climbed into the passenger seat and the truck driver continued down the road. Suddenly the truck driver saw a lawyer walking down the road and instinctively he swerved to hit him but then remembered there was a priest in the truck with him, so at the last minute he swerved back to the road, narrowly missing the lawyer. However, even though he was certain he missed the lawyer, he still heard a loud ‘THUD’. Not understanding where the noise came from he glanced in his mirrors and when he didn’t see anything, he turned to the priest and said, “I'm sorry Father. I almost hit that lawyer.” “That's okay,” replied the priest. “I got him with the door!”

INTERIORS +

Bespoke Décor

A2Z

Interior Design Service and House Doctoring

Urb. Jardin Botanico, Local 14, La Cala de Mijas. Across from BP station. 10 doors up from Snack Attack. Tel: 952 492 166 Mob: 669 496 947 Email: karenfiretto@yahoo.co.uk 54

Art - Sculptures - Hand painted blank furniture - Artefacts Lamps - Mirrors - Dress Agency

ALTERNATIVE MARKETING

Varsha Hair, Nails & Beauty Paul Mitchel - Crystal Clear - Guinot

Manicures & Pedicures Fibre/Gel/Acrylic Reflexology - Massage Spray Tanning - Sunbed Power Plate, - THE PRE-

MIUM VIBRATION EXERCISE MACHINE NOW AVAILABLE

Urb. Jardines Atalaya (Isdabe)Ctra. Cadiz Km 168, Estepona

952 897 907 608 364 712

can’t stop. Burger King condoms - Home of the whopper. Goodyear condoms - For a longer ride go wide. Muller Light condoms - So much pleasure, but where’s the pain. Royal Mail condoms - I saw this and thought of you. Andrex condoms - Soft, strong and very very long. Heineken condoms - reaches parts that other condoms just cannot reach. Carlsberg condoms - Probably the best condoms in the world. AA condoms - For the 4th emergency service. Pepperami condoms - It’s a bit of an animal.

Shop early for a special Christmas gift... At our selective Dress Agency. High street names and designer labels. Accessories, handbags and untold riches.

The Frock GE N A H EXC Tues - Sat 10-2 El Pilar,Benavista (above World Book shop)

29680, Estepona Tel: 689 119 520

Imagine if all major retailers started making their own condoms and kept the same tag line... Sainsbury condoms - Making life taste better. Tesco condoms - Every little helps. Nike condoms - Just do it. Peugeot condoms - The ride of your life. Galaxy condoms - Why have rubber when you can have silk. KFC condoms - Finger licking good. Minstrels condoms - Melt in your mouth, not your hands. Abbey National condoms - Because life is complicated enough. Ever ready condoms - Keeps going and going. Pringles condoms - Once you pop, you

Strange but true... Albert or Marilyn?

When you look at the picture opposite at close range you see Albert Einstein. Now stand up and take several steps back, roughly 15 feet away, It will become... Marilyn Monroe.

Quick Mind Game What is: 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1. Now repeat saying the number 6 to yourself as fast as you can for 15 seconds. Quick!! think of a vegetable! You're thinking of a carrot right? If not, you're among the 2% of the population whose minds are different enough to think of something else.

METACONA Manufacturers of ornate iron work Pool Enclosures and Balustrades Aluminium doors and windows Mosquito screens Shower screens Electric shutters suppliers of scissor gates Stainless steEl welding and fabrications Toldos manual

Add a touch of glass to your surroundings. We specialize in luxury glass pool surrounds and balcony balustrades. With the new Spanish regulations stating that all communal pools must be fully fenced now in effect in the New Year, there is no classier way to acheive this.

or electric Nave 8, Fase 3, Poligono La Vega, Camino Coin, Mijas Costa

Tel: 627 812 987 Email: metacona@hotmail.com

CLMÂŠ2008

to advertise please call 663 061 669

POWERFUL DOUBLE AIRCON UK DRIVER PRIVACY WINDOWS MALAGA AND GIBRALTAR AIRPORTS HEN, STAG PARTIES

SKI TRIPS TO SIERRA NEVADA SEVILLE, RONDA AND GRANADA GOLFING EXCURSIONS FUN AND SUN IN TARIFA

London's Premier Personal TrainerLifestyle Coach With Over 15 Years Experience You Are Never Alone In Your Quest For Improved Health And Fitness. Specializing In Weight Loss, Muscle Gain, Body Toning And General Fitness. Also Offers Free Advice On Diet And Nutrition. Summers On The Way, So Get Fit!

Call Lenny for a free consultation on:

628 684 212 Email: lennyseb@msn.com

Now In Spain

Soon coming to Spain

BOAT OWNERS

Antifoul removal Graffiti removal Swimming pool coating removal Timber restoration etc. Also airless spraying for larger areas This system uses no chemicals and is non toxic Low dust levels and is a totally self contained and mobile unit.

UK: 07717 085 839 Spain: 693 105 803

Email: litefabs@aol.com

A secure rental site is required for this unit and possible employment for someone with suitable experience. Please email with details.

a utri-Cleanse Colonic Irrigation Food Intolerance Testing

man ered.

Colonic Irrigat

Electromaintenance, Lymphatic vements. Treatmentrvice Gift ainting Vouchersmbing

Warm filtered water gently cleanses the colon to remove was & toxins from over 1 year ago. IBS, constipation & weight problems.

niture blinds aintenance

Electrical Lymp

ay on:

Food intoleran

20 years in America. free treatmnet - swe cellulite & immune s

188

Safe, pain-free tests Detox packagesvitamins, & Gift minerals a mall. For more informatio available d Vouchers advice. appointment, call He Clinic: 952 853 838 quesa. Mobile: 628 298 201 952 853 838 or

Clinic: 952 853 838 N utri-Cleanse San Pedro Mobile: 628 298 201 You’ll always find something different at

e asy

Wide selection of beds available at affordable prices. Christmas gifts now in store.

www nutri

Wonderful things for your home, modern and antique. Gifts galore.

New and Quality Second Hand Furniture. Home Packages Available Furnish your home beautifully for half the price! (New beds and sofas included) Jayn and Caroline welcome you to their ‘Aladdin’s Cave’

Open Mon to Fri 10am - 7pm. Sat 10am - 2pm Located at Sr. Nick’s, El Pilar opposite the Crowne Plaza Hotel Km 168.

Look out for the red doors!

Tel: 952 79 22 31

S TA R S I GN S

A look at what's in store for you this month... The month gets off to a pretty wonderful start. You've been working hard and your goals and a little well-deserved R-and-R are in sight! You'll be surrounded by dear Capricorn friends and supportive family and you should feel free to relax and bask in your achievements to date.

Aquarius

Pisces

Aries

Taurus

Gemini

No matter how much you want to skip your workout and adjust your timesheets this month, don't. A few more days of strict self-discipline will bring the payoff you've been waiting for. You'll soon see the benefits, in the form of great energy, fantastic ideas and a sense of calm. Get your accounts in order at the beginning of the month, who owes you what? And what do you owe? Once that's cleared away, you can focus on finding the perfect gift for everyone on your list. The 25th is a lucky day for you and on the 31st, you end the year on an up note! Basically, you're thinking about the world at large and your place in it. Sounds like pretty heavy stuff, but starting to understand yourself on some of these levels will only benefit you in the future. If you're stuck, turn to a trusted friend for advice. All that hard, emotional work you've been doing is really starting to pay off. From confronting old fears to removing current ones, you've been dealing with feelings of insecurity that often hold people back and you can greet the last month of the year with confidence. Is there an element of confusion in your life that you just can't seem to shake? It's time to devote all your energy into nailing this thing down. What is it, exactly, that's eluding you? Once you've simply identified the source of the confusion, you're more than halfway to resolving it.

Cancer

Leo

Virgo

Libra

Scorpio

You need to make an extra effort to ensure everyone is on your wavelength in your personal and professional life. A fundamental misperception could really throw you and that's the last thing you need right now. Clear the air and you’ll be rewarded for your flexibility. Your ego may be bellowing ‘feed me’ but now is not the time when you should give into that hungry ego. On the 5th, all that glitters is not gold and every offer on the table isn't quite as profitable as it may appear. Do some thorough research before you commit. If you're single, you have a good chance of encountering somebody particularly cute at work on the 1st. If you're taken, you could encounter them, anyway. Luckily, you'll have so much in common with this person that a platonic friendship is a real possibility, too. You are a smooth operator this month! Solving problems with grace and panache that impresses absolutely everybody. On the 10th, being overly possessive is not the best way to show your love for someone. Try to go beyond your old emotional limitations. It's definitely time to tackle that domestic issue head on. Your partner may well be feeling neglected and with all the festive parties this month be aware that jealously might rear its ugly head. Simply talking to your partner will aleviate many of their concerns.

Watch the pennies at the beginning of the month to avoid having to scrimp on pressies and miss out on festive celebrations later. Unless it’s something that will help you make Sagittarius money in the near future don’t buy it! Reflect on the past year and see if there are lessons to be learned.

Dulux SUPER SALE ON Clearance Stock Free roller and tray

TILE SHOWROOM AND WAREHOUSE

KITCHENS APPLIANCES BATHROOMS

Paint 5 litres colour from €17 20 litres: White from €40 Colours from €50

MARBLE GRANITE PAINT TILES ADHESIVES

Office: 951 275 257 Ralph: 619 412 288 Gill: 667 513 977

Calle Bilbao No. 4. San Pedro de Alcantara Email: hardrocktiles@hotmail.com

Golf Tips And Tricks How to mark a score card by Mark Sibley of Miraflores Golf Academy Marking a score card and not making a mistake is important as under the rules of golf you can’t mark your own card and will be responsible for keeping record of another players score as you play. The score card below shows what the

MARK SIBLEY

PGA GOLF PROFESSIONAL

UK QUALIFIED 15 YEARS OF COACHING EXPERIENCE LESSONS FOR ALL LEVELS OF GOLFER BEGINNER TO PLAYING PROFESSIONAL LESSON PACKAGES AVAILABLE NOW BASED AT THE MIRAFLORES GOLF ACADEMY NOW WITH FULLY STOCKED PROFESSIONAL SHOP MIRAFLORES DRIVING RANGE & GOLF ACADEMY. S/N RIVIERA DEL SOL, 29649 MIJAS COSTA. TEL: 952 933 729 OR 678 833 736

colours, figures and boxes mean. Hole - The hole you have played. Yellow - The total distance of the hole from the men’s tee box. S.I-Hcp - The stroke indexes for the holes, telling you how difficult the hole is on the course 18 being the easiest and 1 the most difficult. Red - total distance for the hole from ladies tee box. S.I-Hip -The stroke index for hole from ladies tee box. Par - Strokes allowed achieving par on the hole. A, B, C - Lines where the names of the players whose score you are recording and their scores are entered. D/Marker - Line where the marker keeps record of their own score. Points - Line where points are recorded when playing in stableford format. When you get to the end of your first nine holes enter a total of the players score for

Golf Academy

that nine under the par total box. At the end of your game enter the total for the second nine holes in the total box for that nine, then add the two totals together entering the result into the total scored box under the total par for the course. Enter the players handicap into the box next to total score and subtract the handicap from the total score to give the players net score for the round. Practice Balls at the Miraflores Academy have been replaced. Any golfers wanting to try the new balls in the system can take advantage of our 2 for 1 offer Monday to Friday between 12 Noon and 4pm. Just ask in the professional shop at the Golf Academy.

www.costalinkmagazine.com

Paint and Repair Garage SCRATCHES BUMPER SCUFFS CHIPS DENTS CRASH REPAIRS INSURANCE REPAIRS FULL CAR RESPRAY WINDSCREENS TINTED WINDOWS

Tel: 952 49 93 05 Mob: 653 10 71 86

SPAS4YOU.COM B E F O R E YO U BU Y. . . V I S I T U S

Premium Quality American Spas A Spa for every size and budget Large showroom and warehouse in Estepona. Spas available for immediate delivery Outstandingly keen prices

CLMÂŠ2008

Juan de Mena 24 Estepona Poligono Next to Furniture World 902 88 11 02 952 79 75 70 667 59 90 24 www.spas4you.com Email: info@spas4you.com

London Barber FUENGIROLA PORT GENTS HAIRDRESSER NOW INCORPORATING

LONDON HAIR UNISEX HAIRDRESSERS

CUT & STYLING COLOURS - NAILS PERMS - TREATMENTS OUT OF HOURS APPOINTMENTS

SPECIAL OFFERS ON SKY+

GB TV

CALL US NOW FOR A QUOTE

SKY DIGITAL Installation within 24 hours HD free to air boxes available

Call Us Today 658 084 802 658 084 806 Fuengirola, Marbella, San Pedro, Estepona WE COVER ALL AREAS and in between. From the coast to the campo

SKY CARDS - CONTRACTS - ACTIVATIONS RE - ALIGNMENTS - NO FIX NO FEE

Can you spot the seven differences? 66

What do you call Santa Claus when he doesn't move? Santa Pause What do you get if you cross Santa Claus with a duck? Christmas Quackers! What does Rudolph want for Christmas? A Snowy Sleighstation!

get your kids business seen by the ones that matter. call:663 061 669

MRS CHIPPY

TRADITIONAL FISH & CHIP SHOP IN ALHAURIN EL GRANDE (OPP. MERCADONA) PROPER CHIP SHOP CHIPS €5 MENU - FISH & CHIPS, ANY PIE & CHIPS, ZINGER BURGER & CHIPS, KEBAB & CHIPS €1 MENU - INC. SAUSAGES , FISHCAKES, PEAS ETC. OPENING HOURS :lUNCHTIMES: tUES -SAT 12.30-2.30 EVENINGS: MON-SAT 17.30 -22.00. TAKE AWAY OR EAT IN. TELEPHONE ORDERS WELCOME JUST RING: 666 954 434

FINNISH QUALITY & DESIGN

The revolutionary frameless glazing system that allows you to turn your balcony, patio or porch into a space that you may use around the year! Product & installation guarantee 5 years. Priority number one is the quality of our work! To arrange a free quotation without obligation: Call: (+34) 647 122 747 Or email: cristalino@rock.com cristalinoglass.googlepages.com

SATELLITE INSTALLATIONS SATELLITE, COMMUNITY, SURROUND SYSTEMS ETC. INSTALLED AND MAINTAINED T.V, VIDEO AND ELECTRONIC REPAIRS IN HOUSE. MOBILE PHONE SALES, SIMMS, TOP-UPS AND CALLING CARDS. WIRELESS INTERNET AND HOTSPOT

LOCAL 10, DOÑA LOLA, OPP. EL ZOCO (CALAHONDA) TEL: 952 93 91 98 MOB: 607 383 578 EMAIL: reeceelectronics@ya.com

Patio doors secured, Safes opened and fitted, Locks upgraded, Changed key holding. Fully registered. Credit cards now taken. Call Bob and Debbie on:

952 660 233 - 667 668 685

THE E GLISH

PIE SHOP

Sausage Rolls, Scotch Eggs, Pasties, Pies, Crumbles, Quiches, Fruit Pies, Wraps and Hot and Cold Rolls made to order with Fresh Beef or Roast Ham, Vegetarian Pies. OUTSIDE CATERING AVAILABLE FOR WEDDINGS, PARTIES AND FUNCTIONS. Local 16B C.C. Calypso Calahonda Tel: 619 522 331 68

OPENING TIMES MONDAY - FRIDAY 10.00 - 16.00 SAT 10.00 - 14.00

Bringing all the excitement of Las Vegas and glamour of Monte Carlo direct to your: Pub, Club, Hotel, Yacht or Private Villa. With our professional croupiers and full size roulette and black jack tables you will have a night to remember. For bookings and enquiries please contact: 680 739 942 662 426 778 info@casino-fun4u.com www.casino-fun4u.com

Corporate Entertainment • Wedding Receptions Clubs & Associations • Product Launches • Dinner Dances • Private Parties • Fundraising • Grand Openings • Exhibitions • Christmas Parties

T he Jokes page

page

An Australian, an Irishman and a Glaswegian are in a bar. They're staring at another man sitting on his own at a table in the corner. He's so familiar, and not recognising him is driving them mad. They stare and stare, until suddenly the Irishman twigs: “My God, it's Jesus!” Sure enough, it is Jesus, nursing a pint. Thrilled, they send him over a pint of Guinness, a pint of Fosters and a bottle of Buckfast. Jesus accepts the drinks, smiles over at the three men, and drinks the pints slowly, one after another. After he's finished the drinks, Jesus approaches the trio. He reaches for the hand of the Irishman Smell my finger? and shakes it, Dat’s your mama! thanking him for the Guinness. When he lets go, the Irishman gives a cry of amazement: “My God! The arthritis I've had for 30 years is gone. It's a miracle!” Jesus then shakes the Aussie's hand, thanking him for the lager. As he lets go, the man's eyes widen in shock. “Strewth mate, the bad back I've had all my life is completely gone! It's a miracle.” Jesus then approaches the Glaswegian who knocks over a chair and a table in trying to get away from the Son of God. “What's wrong my son?” says Jesus. The Glaswegian shouts, “You

f*** off, I'm on disability benefit!” Harold is 82 and having some prostate problems. After examining him, the doctor gives him a specimen jar and says “Take this home with you, and try to produce a semen specimen. Stop by tomorrow and drop it off so I can run a few tests.” Harold takes the jar and heads home. The next day Harold comes in and asks to speak with the doctor. When he is taken into the office, the doctor asks how he got on. “Not good, Doc.” says Harold. “I went home and tried to do what you said. I tried with my right hand until it was cramped from the arthritis...no luck. I tried with my left hand, until I had blisters...no luck. I asked my wife to help me out, so she tried with her left hand and with her right hand... no luck. She even tried with her mouth. She tried with her teeth in, and she tried with her teeth out... still no luck. Then we called Edna, next door, to see if she could help.” “Good Grief man!” exclaimed the doctor, “You asked your neighbor to help you?” “Yep,” says Harold, “None of us could get the lid off that damn jar.” Little Tony was staying with his grandmother for a few days.. He'd been playing outside with the other kids for a while when he came into the house and asked her, “Grandma, what's that called when two people sleep in the same room and one is on top of the other?” She was a little taken aback, but she decided to just tell him the truth. “It's called sexual intercourse, darling.” Little Tony just said, “Oh, OK,” and went back outside to play with the other kids. A few minutes later he came back in and said angrily, “Grandma, it isn’t called sexual intercourse. It’s called ‘Bunk Beds’ and Jimmy’s mum wants to talk to you.”

to advertise please call 663 061 669

HAIR & BEAUTY SPA SEBASTIAN PROFESSIONAL

Pure-Col

WWW.FORUMHAIRANDBEAUTY.COM

952 599 098

Edificio calasol, local b 13, la cala de mijas, mijas costa.

What ’s New Kool Kids

Now open in Jardin Botanico is the fantastic new children’s clothes shop Kool Kids stocking designer and character childrens clothes and toys. With names like Ralph Lauren, Juicy, OshKosh and Timberland as well as some of the harder to source here in Spain character toys and clothing such as High School Musical, Thomas the Tank Engine and Dora the Explorer the shop is definately worth a visit before Christmas. You can find them at Jardín Botánico 19. Call: 952 493 086 or see advert on page 24. CasinoFun4You Fancy something different for your Christmas or New Year party this year?

Bring the excitement of Las Vegas and the Glamour of Monte Carlo right here to the Costa del Sol with Casinofun4you. With professional croupiers and full size roulette and black jack tables you’re sure to have a night to remember. For further information visit www.casinofun4you.com or see their advert page 69. Lil’ Robs Enjoy your New Years Eve at Lil Rob’s in El Zoco. They will be having a disco and karaoke from 9.00pm until late and they have some of the best seats on the coast to view the New Years fireworks from their large terrace. For more information call: 666 834 616 or see their advert page 38.

F o ru m HAIR & BEAUTY SPA 5 STAR SPECIAL

Specialists in timber decking, pergola’s and gazebo’s.

Aromatics facial, back and shoulder massage, eyelash tint, brow shape, shampoo and blow dry. Only 80 euros. TOP TO TOE

Spa pedicure, Spa manicure, nail paint, shampoo and blow dry. - 55 euros GOLDEN TAN

Face & body exfoliation, all over spray tan, shampoo and blow dry. - 40 euros

Increase your living space and improve your lifestyle. For more information or a free quotation please contact:

BRIGHT EYES

Eyelash extensions, eyelash tint, eyebrow shape and tint. -38 euros Dr. Grays next visits for Botox and Collagen are November 4th and December 2nd.

Email: info@ecodeckspain.com

www.ecodeckspain.com

Tel: 952 887 700 Mob: 679 975 683

WWW.FORUMHAIRANDBEAUTY.COM

Edificio Calasol, Local B 13. La Cala de Mijas, Mijas Costa

Monsoon Iwww.monsooninteriors.com nteriors Stockists of: rugs, mosaic tables, lamps, lanterns, ceramics, wrought iron and solid sheesham wood furniture. Detailed, current stock photos emailed to customers. Free delivery for orders over â&#x201A;Ź400. Situated in Solerche, 6km from Iznajar to Rute

Open: Wed - Sat 10am - 2pm Sun 10am - 1pm

Email stefbala@yahoo.com.

957 534 906

Adrenalin Junkies Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop. The owner comes over and asks if he can help them. “Yeah, we'll take four of dem dere little budgies” says Gerry. The owner puts the budgies in a paper bag. Paddy and Gerry leave the shop and get into Gerry's truck to drive to the top of a cliff. At the top, Gerry looks down at the 1000-foot drop and says, “Dis looks like a grand place.” He takes two birds out of the bag, puts them on his shoulders and jumps off the cliff. Paddy watches as Gerry falls all the way to the bottom, killing himself stone dead. Looking down at the remains of his best pal, Paddy shakes his head and says, “Fook dat. Dis budgie jumping is too fook'n dangerous for me!” Moment's later, Seamus arrives. He’s been to the pet shop too and walks up to the edge of the cliff carrying a paper bag in one hand and a shotgun in the other. “Hi,

Paddy. Watch dis,” Seamus says. He takes a parrot from the bag and throws himself over the edge of the cliff. Paddy watches as half way down, Seamus takes the gun and shoots the parrot. Seamus continues to plummet down until he hits the bottom and breaks every bone in his body. Paddy shakes his head and says, “And I'm never trying dat parrotshooting either!” Paddy is just getting over the shock of losing two friends when Sean appears. He’s also been to the pet shop and is carrying a paper bag out of which he pulls a chicken. Sean then hurls himself off the cliff and disappears down until he hits a rock and breaks his spine. Once more Paddy shakes his head. “Fook dat, lads. First dere was Gerry with his budgie jumping, den Seamus parrotshooting...and now Sean and his fook'n hen-gliding!”

ANH PLUMBING & MAINTENANCE CITY & GUILD QUALIFIED PLUMBER CORGI REGISTERED (234955) COMPLETE SYSTEMS REPAIRS AND MAINTENANCE BATHROOM AND KITCHEN REFURBISHMENT PLASTERING RENDERING AND TILING 24 HOUR CALL OUT TAKE MY CARD QUALITY ASSURED ANH PLUMBING ALL WORK CARRIED OUT Tel: 687 391 829 WILL BE SUBJECT TO A neilhunston@hotmail.co.uk 12 MONTH GUARANTEE CLM©2008

Want to walk on water? Here at Costa Link we are always on the look out for new and exciting things to do with our very precious free time. So when we heard about Aguaspheres, the latest craze to hit the Costa del Sol, we were keen to find out more and went to vist them at the Lions Club Christmas fair at Hotel Tamisa Golf. Aguaspheres are two meter high inflatable spheres that allow you to run, walk and even somersault on water without even getting wet! Our kids loved it when it was their turn, giggling and laughing the whole time. They proved to be extremely popular with people of all ages with there being a constant queue for a go in them all day. They are available for private hire so why not make your Birthday/Christmas/Office party or any type of event unique and different by hiring an aguasphere. Being non weather dependent is an extra added bonus. For a limited period until Christmas they are also available to buy - what a cool Christmas present that would make!

Great fun for all ages!

To find out more call Aguaspheres on 693 579 690

Walk on water without even getting or to see them in action visit their website: www.aguaspheres.com and watch the video. wet!

House Cleaning. Household & Garden Rubbish Clearance. Marble Floor Buffing & Polishing. Pick up and Delivery Service with same day delivery.

Tel: 656 721 511 Email: bosssman1@hotmail.com

SKY DIGIBOX REPAIRS DON’T JUST BUY A NEW DIGIBOX LET US TRY AND REPAIR IT FIRST REPAIRS TO ALL DIGIBOXES - SKY, SKY+ AND SKY HD. ALSO HARD DRIVE UPGRADES. DOUBLE YOUR SKY+ MEMORY

LOCAL 10, DOÑA LOLA, OPP. EL ZOCO (CALAHONDA) TEL: 952 93 91 98 MOB: 607 383 578 EMAIL: REECEELECTRONICS@YA.COM

Putting the Shine back in your home

INTERNATIONAL

DRIVING LICENCES

All Categories Valid Worldwide Fast Delivery

610 868 748

Tel: 951 273 218 Unisex Hair Salon 20% Discount For Senior Citizens (Wed & Sat ) (not valid with other offers)

Urb. Calypso. Mon-Fri 10-7 Thur 10-9 Sat 10-4

RETAINING WALL SOLUTIONS Are you wasting valuable land? Garden on a slope, no room for a pool?

A modular block system and EC7 approved An engineered solution means a safe retaining wall No more waiting - fast installation and a planned programme Looks l ike natural stone – custom colouring Affordable and maintenance free No hidden costs Guaranteed work, qual ified installers

Tel/Fax: 0034 952 666 547 www.retainingwallsolutions.eu

On DVD - available at Little Hollywood, Los Jarales, Calahonda. Batman: The Dark Knight - With the help of Lieutenant Jim Gordon and the committed new District Attorney, Batman sets out to destroy organized crime in Gotham City for good, but they soon find themselves prey to a rising criminal mastermind known as ‘The Joker’, who forces the Dark Knight ever closer to crossing the fine line between hero and vigilante.

Hancock - Superhero Hancock’s (Will Smith) well-intentioned heroics might get the job done and save countless lives, but always seem to leave jawdropping damage in their wake. As grateful as they are to have their local hero, the good citizens of Los Angeles are wondering what they did to deserve this guy. Hancock isn't a man who cares what people think until the day that he saves the life of PR executive Ray Embrey (Jason Bateman).

Hellboy 2: The Golden Army - The mythical world starts a rebellion against humanity in order to rule the Earth, so as Hellboy and his team returns they must save the world from

the rebellious creatures. Now, as the creatures who inhabit the spiritual realm gear-up for an all out attack on the human plane, the only one capable of saving the Earth is a tough-talking hellspawn rejected by both worlds.

All new releases available on release date. Films for all ages available to rent

CD’s from classics to charts. A great selection for sale

XBox, WII, PS3. All games available. All in English. If we have not got it, just ask!

TEL: 610 870 221 Email: littlehollywood@hotmail.co.uk

LOS JARALES, LOCAL 13, CALAHONDA, MIJAS COSTA 78

to advertise your business please call 663 061 669

ocal Info Emergency Numbers Central number for Fire, Police & Ambulance National Police Local Police Guardia Civil dica

112 091 092 062

Medical

Emergency 061 Ambulance Marbella 902 505 061 Ambulance Coin 952 453 267

Marbella 952 769 946 Coin 952 452 767 San Pedro 952 787 700

Town Halls Marbella 952 761 100 San Pedro 952 453 020 La Cala de Mijas 952 493 208 Fuengirola 952 589 300 Estepona 952 801 100

Fire Brigade Emergency number 080 Marbella 952 774 349 Estepona 952 804 483 Fuengirola 952 461 046

Markets

Consulates 952 952 952 952 952 952 952

352 475 226 604 212 226 474

300 108 373 383 442 590 891

Tourist Information Marbella Coin Estepona Fuengirola San Pedro

Bus Stations Marbella 952 764 400 Coin 952 450 366 San Pedro 952 781 396 Estepona 952 800249 For a list of complete times www.andalucia.com/travel/bus Train Timetables 902 240 202 Airports Malaga 952 048 844 Gibraltar 956 773 026

Health Centres

British Ireland Denmark Sweden Germany France U.S.A

Transport

952 771 442 952 822 818 952 822 818 952 467 457 952 785 252

Monday - Marbella (fairground site on east side) Tuesday - Fuengirola (fairground near Los Boliches) Wednesday - Estepona (Avda. Juan Carlos) La Cala - Feria ground Thursday - San Pedro (Recinto Ferial) Alhaurin el Grande - (La Fama) Friday - Alhaurin el Grande (Bar Aquamania) Saturday - Coin (Calle Urbano Pineda) La Cala - Feria ground. Sunday - Puerto Estepona

(Marina)

Cinemas

All the Cinemas listed below show films in English as well as Spanish. Call first to check what is showing that week. Marbella: Cinesur Plaza del Mar 952 766 941 La Ca単ada 902 333 231 Puerto Banus: Gran Marbella 952 810 077 Coin: La Trocha 951 315 039 Fuengirola Cinesur Miramar 902 221 622

Chemists 24 hour chemist Urb. Artola, Ctra. Cadiz Km 194. Marbella. Tel: 952 83 25 89

Taxis Marbella Taxis 952 774 488 Mijas Costa Taxis 952 476 593

Diary Dates 6th December - Day of the Constitution Public Holiday. 6th December - Festival of Christmas Traditions Parque Butibamba, La Cala de Mijas Christmas food and crafts. Christmas performances from various countries. 11am to 6pm. 8th December - Immaculate Conception - Public Holiday. 22nd December - Spanish Christmas Lottery (El Gordo)

if you would like to sponsor this page please call 663 061 669

ThelReviews c osta ink directory Advertise Your business here for just €65 for 12 issues -that’s just over 5 a month!!! or have it framed for only €99! MPA Homes Baby Boutique>> Computer Repairs & Sales Builders M & MH Builders 30 years experience, reforms, new builds, kitchens, hard landscaping & pools. Tel: 952 457 977 or 615 309 446 JCB Builders Property Maintenance Multi Services, All jobs considered Repairs and Improvements Pool Cleaning Service Free Estimates and Advice All Areas Covered. Fully Legal Tel Jonno: 677 079 704(Day) 952 882 305(Eve)

Building Supplies Aim Building Supplies Las Chapas Poligono, Elviria, Marbella. Tel: 952 835 172

Car Traders Alhaurin Autos Cars bought and sold. LHD and RHD. Alhaurin el Grande. Tel: 661 964 014

Cleaning ‘We Care to Clean and We Clean to Care’ for your domestic property. Daily/Weekly cleans, Spring cleans, ‘One offs’, Moving house cleans and End of tenancy cleans. Contact Karen: 677 553 647 karencox@live.co.uk

Mintmicro S.L. Computer Shop Alhaurin el Grande, for Inks, Sales - Repairs & Upgrades.Virus & Spyware Removal Open 10 - 6 Mon - Friday No Siesta. Saturday 10 - 2 Tel: 951 160 411 or Skype: mintmicro.support Email: info@mintmicro.es

Electrician 16th Edition BS7671 qualified, Apprentice trained, 21 years experience. Rewires, extra sockets, lights, fault finding etc. Pay as you go electric meters supplied and fitted, ideal for holiday lets, aircon etc. Ian: 650 151 569

Estate & Rental

Edif. Euromarket, Local 4, Urb Calypso, 29649, Mijas Costa, Malaga. Tel: 952 933 534

Fish and Aquariums The Fish Factory Tropical and fresh water fish, pond and tank maintenance, funky aquariums. Cancelada Pueblo. Tel: 952 884 953

Fish and Chip Shop The Boat House El Zoco Calahonda. Mijas Costa’s premier Fish & Chip Restaurant and takeaway. The best Fish & Chips on the Coast. Tel: 952930148 Open 7 nights a week

Game Room Game Room Marbella Tel: 952 806 178

Glass Curtains

Kingfisher Club

Elite Glass Curtains.

Holiday rentals. Self catering holiday rentals suitable for families. Kingfisher Club, Edificio Benal Beach, Ctra. de Cadiz km 221, 29630, Benalmadena Costa. Tel: (0034) 952 440 659 Email: kingfisherclub@ctv.es www.thekingfisherclub.com

Poligono Elviria 26 Elviria, 29600. Tel: 952 830 503

Hairdressers Inspirations Urb. Calypso. Tel: 951 273 218

Hair Magic Urb. Calypso Tel: 952 931 777

please mention the costa link magazine when responding to adverts

c osta l ink directory Internet

Painters

Y-Internet.com Y-Internet.com Broadband internet & teleBroadband internet &

phone service provider for telephone service provider residents, communities & for residents, communities holidaymakers. & holidaymakers. Tel: 952932266 or visit our Tel: 952932266 or visit our website www.y-internet.com website: www.y-internet.com for more information for more information

Kitchens Kitchens & Beyond Kitchens, bedrooms and studies. Free design and consultation. Tel: 952 88 65 55

Ladies Fashion The Ladys Shop Ladies clothing, footwear and designer hand bags. La Cala. Tel: 952 493 455

Lawyers VELASCO Y BALBÁS ABOGADOS Conveyancing Rentals Debt Collection Inheritance and Wills Insurances Litigation. Tel: 952 808 477 Fax: 952 808 724 Avd. España 220, 3ºC, 29680, Estepona.

info@vbabogados.com

Marble Floor Polishing NON-SLIP, LASTING SHINE, NO MESS OR DUST. SPECTACULAR RESTORATIONS. FULL GRINDING SERVICE TEL: 608 455 104 BLITZ OF ELVIRIA

Professional painting. Interior and exterior and decorative painting. www.artdecoxxiplus.com Tel: 667 235 741 after 3p.m.

Parking Space Barriers Myparkingspace.com Fully lockable parking prevention system. perfect for communal parking areas. Only €99 with free delivery. Tel: 678 43 00 92 myparkingspace@gmail.com

Satellite TV GB TV Sky installation within 24 hours. Sky cards, re-alignments and activations Tel: 658 084 802 or 658 084 806.

Security Fortress Security All steelwork. Grills, gates, fences, balconies, garage doors. Tel: 952 931 128

Dragon Security Systems

Perfectos Pools

Concept smoke screen system, CCTV, Intruder alarm systems and more. Tel: 670 954 409

Spas, pools, chemicals, and poolside furniture Tel: 952 417 562

Hard Rock

Pools and Spas

Spas 4 You Premium quality American spas for every size and budget. Tel: 902 88 11 02

Printing & Signage Eyeprint Business cards, flyers, signage, display stands. Tel: 951 310 395 or 952 906 121

Removals The Depot International and local removal specialists. Pol. Ind San Pedro, Marbella. Tel: 952 450 487

Please let our advertisers know you found them in Costa Link Magazine

Tile Warehouse Tile showroom and warehouse. Kitchens and appliances, bathrooms, marble, granite and paint. Tel: 951 275 257

advertise your business in the

costa link