Costa Link Magazine May 09 by paulsnooks

Costa lInk magazine

COVERING COSTA DEL SOL - INCLUDING FUENGIROLA, LA CALA, CALAHONDA, ELVIRIA, MARBELLA, PUERTO BANUS, SAN PEDRO, ESTEPONA, LA DUQUESA AND SOTOGRANDE.

MAY 2009 NO.26

Jokes Puzzles Local Info Bar & Restaurant Guide Kids Page What’s On Guide Business Directory

Glass Curtains S.L.

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ALHAURIN AUTOS Alhaurin

With over 15 years experience in the UK, we at Alhaurin Autos know how to look after our customers. We will take part exchanges of either English or Spanish vehicles. We even give you cash back if you wish to trade down to a smaller car. We have a fully qualified gestor and will take care of all the legalities for you. Can’t get to see us? No problem, we’ll bring the car to you. Servicing and repairs at competative prices 3, 6 and 12 month warranties available.

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LEFT HAND DRIVE PEUGEOT 206, 1.4, 2004, on Spanish plates CITROEN PICASSO 2 LTR DIESEL, PAS, AC, CD, 2000. SEAT MARBELLA, 1993, 850cc, only 86,000Km. BMW 850 I, 1990, PAS, A/C, FSH, leather interior, long I.T.V. PEUGEOT PARTNER 1.9 TD. 2004 PAS 5 seats and Side doors. 45.000kms, lovely example. FORD FOCUS SALOON, four door, 1.6 Zetec manual. 2001, PAS, A/C ,E/W ,C/L ,radio, FSH. VW GOLF, 1.9 TDi, PAS, A/C, Long I.T.V., 1996 SEAT IBIZA, 1.4 petrol, PAS, A/C, CD, New I.T.V. OPEL COMBO 1.7 DTi, 2003, A/C, C/L, E/W, rear loading door, 5 seats, I.T.V., only 50,000Km, immaculate. MERCEDES E200 Auto, TD, 1993, PAS, bargain CITROEN XANTIA, 1.9 TDi, 1997, PAS, A/C, Just serviced. RIGHT HAND DRIVE NISSAN NAVARA 2.5D, 1997, top truck, 2 sets of wheels, MOT and tax. DEL BOYS TROTTER INDEPENDENT TRADING VAN, As seen on TV, No plonkers. FIAT ULYSEE, 2LT., JTD, Diesel, PAS, A/C, 7 seats, 2000. LDV SHERPA 2.5 DIESEL, 1998, side loading and rear shutter door, P/S, perfect for trip back to UK. Ready to go 4 WHEEL DRIVE & QUADS SSAYONG REXTON, 2.9 CRDI, Diesel, Auto, 2007, PAS, A/C, CD, Immaculate, 2 years warranty. NISSAN TERRANO, 2.7 TDi II, SWB, AUTOMATIC, PAS, A/C, CD. RICE TWIN HORSE BOX, 4 brand new wheels and tyres. QUAD, Campo. 500 Polaris. Towbar and trailer.

MERCEDES E320 CDI AUTO, Classic, 2000, PAS, A/C, 2 years I.T.V., FSH, New tyres.

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Well things are certainly brightening up here on the coast. Yes, just as we all pop the last mini egg into our mouths and lick the last of the fondant filling from the creme egg, the sun suddenly heats up, the clouds (well most of them) melt away and bikini and speedo season is just around the corner, which, to many of us means months of walking around sucking your tummy in and/or puffing your chest, which I personally think is a work out in itself!

www.costalinkmagazine.com

Dates for your diary this month are a cheeky Deposito Legal: MA-228-2007 bank holiday on the Friday 1st giving us a nice long weekend and to make it even better Spanish Deadline Date: 15th of each Mothers day is on the 2nd. Sounds good to me! month. So before the beaches and bars become burstNo part of this publication, including ing at the seams and the car parking spaces pictures may be copied, SCANNED, used or reproduced without our prior become rarer than hens teeth, make the most of the warmer, but not boiling weather and settle written consent. Costa Link Magazine accepts no responsi- yourself down outside for a good read of this bility for alterations to events listed, claims months costa link magazine. Hope you made by our advertisers or information have a fantastic month and remember, keep provided by our contributors. smiling!

Inside This Monthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Issue

Bar & Restaurant Guide

Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s On Guide

Puzzles

Jokes Page

Kids Page

41 & 55

to advertise in costa link magazine please call 663 061 669

952 462 092

A W o m a n’s W o r l d Fridge Magnets for Women! “I don’t skinny dip, I chunky dunk.” “I only have a kitchen because it came with the house.” “I don’t have hot flushes, I have short, private holidays in the tropics.” “If it’s not one thing it’s your mother” “A balanced diet is a bar of chocolate in both hands.” “I have PMS and ESP. That makes me a bi*ch that knows everything.” “I gave up jogging because my thighs kept rubbing together and setting my knickers on fire.” “They lied...hard work has killed loads of people.”

“Born free, now I’m expensive.” Underwear Dust One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife, “Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in ‘Slim Fast’. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!” His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go unrewarded. The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer. “What the heck is this?” he said to himself as a little ‘dust’ cloud appeared when he shook them out... “April”, he hollered into the bathroom, “Why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?” She replied with a snigger. “It's not talcum powder...it's ‘Miracle Grow!’”

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W h a t ’s T h e G o s s Kerry Katona who famously had £15,000 of plastic surgery, including liposuction last year, was seen all over the gossip magazine pages showing off her trim new figure, but recent photos show she just can’t keep the weight off or shift her stubborn jelly belly. Perhaps the star, who’s admitted to comfort eating in the past, has turned to junk food again as a result of her troubles, the latest being a major bust-up with husband Mark Croft. The volatile pair split in March when Kerry accused him of using her for her money, but were reunited four days later. Bankrupt Kerry is also said to be irrationally convinced that Mark’s having an affair with his ex-girlfriend Louise Oortwyn, the mother of his daughter Keeley, seven. Added to that,

Kerry’s said to be worried about losing her lucrative deal with supermarket chain Iceland - Dancing On Ice star Coleen Nolan has taken the lead role in their recent ads. With all this going on, it’s no wonder keeping in shape is the last thing on Kerry’s mind.! Britain's Got Talent sensation Susan Boyle must be feeling as if she's living in a dream. Not only has her performance of ‘I Dreamed A Dream’ now been viewed over 6 million times on YouTube, but she's now even appeared on Good Morning America as well as NBC's Today Show. The female presenter of the latter was moved to tears when the audition was played. cont....

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W h a t ’s T h e G o s s Simon Cowell has also talked about his excitement for Susan, saying, “She literally just had an offer from Oprah to do her show. If she went on Oprah I think there's every chance Susan Boyle will have the number one album in America, I will predict that.” Blimey! Going on Oprah and having the Number One in the US? Not too bad for an unknown volunteer from West Lothian. Susan herself seems overwhelmed by all the interest, but her brother has said, “She is as high as a kite!” Bless her. Britain's Got Talent fans have been flooding internet forums with complaints after Shaheen Jafargholi's impressive CV was leaked online. The 12-year-old wowed the judges and audience at the audition in Cardiff, which was televised on Saturday.

It's now emerged Shaheen has appeared on Casualty and Torchwood and attended the prestigious Mark Jermin Stage School. “I think it's a long, long way from the spirit of the totally unknown, inexperienced amateur, everyday person we're supposed to believe in,” says one fan. But a show spokesman insists Shaheen has not broken any rules. “Britain's Got Talent is open to everyone whether they are professional or amateur,” the rep tells the Daily Mail.

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“Tragedy” Gordon Brown was visiting a primary school and he visited one of the classes. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asked Mr. Brown if he would like to lead the discussion on the word ‘tragedy’. So the illustrious leader asked the class for an example of a ‘tragedy’. A little boy stood up and offered: “If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a tractor runs over him and kills him, that would be a ‘tragedy.’ “No”, said Gordon “that would be an accident.” A little girl raised her hand: “If a school bus carrying fifty children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy” “I'm afraid not,” explained Gordon “that's what we

would call great loss.” The room went silent. No other children volunteered. Gordon searched the room. “Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?” Finally, at the back of the room, little Johnny raised his hand. In a quiet voice he said: “If a plane carrying you and Alastair Darling was struck by a ‘friendly fire’ missile and blown to smithereens, that would be a tragedy.” “Fantastic!” exclaimed Gordon, “That's right, and can you tell me why that would be tragedy?” “Well,” says little Johnny “it has to be a tragedy, because it certainly wouldn't be a great loss, and it probably wouldn't be a f*@king accident either!”

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Christmas Bonus Three dustbin men, the driver and two other men, are going on their rounds asking for christmas bonuses which they do yearly. They stop at the first house and one man runs in and a women gives him €5. They move on to another house and a bloke gives him €6. They pull up to the next house and the man runs in knocks on the door. A blonde women answers and says “Oh yes...come upstairs with me”. Without reply he follows the blonde lady upstairs and she gives him the best sex he’s had in a long time. Once they are finished she says “Now if you could go and get your mate for me and tell him to come in for his bonus.” The man who still can’t believe his luck runs out to his mate and says “Quick! Go in get your bonus, she'll show you a bloody good time, one hell of a bonus!” The second man goes in, the blonde lady shows him upstairs and

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true to her word she also shows gives him the best bonus he’s ever had . When they’re finished she says “Now, go and get your driver and send him in for his bonus,” Off the second man goes and says to the driver “Driver, it’s your turn now, go on my son its one hell of a christmas bonus!” so off the driver goes. He steps in the door very excited but instead of taking him upstairs she reaches for her purse and pulls out €5 and gives it to him. He says “What the hell is this, you give my two friends the time of their life and you give me this?!” The beautiful blonde lady turns around and explains “I have strict instructions from my husband. When I told him last night you’d be round to collect your bonuses today he said ‘Oh sod em, scrounghing g*ts. Just give a fiver to the driver and f**k the other two!’”

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The car accident ... A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning. It's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. As they crawl out of their cars, the man is ranting and raving about women drivers. How they shouldn’t be allowed on the road. The woman simply brushes herself off and says, “Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but we're unhurt. That is a miracle. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends.” Flattered, the man replies, “Yes, I agree with you completely, this must be a sign from God. But, you're still at fault! Women shouldn't be allowed to drive.

The woman continues, “and look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune.” Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it, drinks half the bottle in just a few gulps and then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle and immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man. The man asks, “Aren't you having any?” The woman replies, “No, I think I'll just wait for the police...”

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The moral of the story... The teacher gave her year three class an assignment to get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories. Ashley said, “My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg laying hens. One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the car when we hit a big bump in the road and all the eggs went flying and broke and made a mess.” “What's the moral of the story?” asked the teacher. “Don't put all your eggs in one basket!” “Very good,” said the teacher. Next little Sarah raised her hand and said, “Our family are farmers too, but we raise chickens for the meat market. We had a dozen eggs one time, but when they hatched we only got ten live chicks, and the moral to this story is, “don't count your chickens before they're hatched.”

“That was a fine story Sarah. Michael, do you have a story to share?” “Yes, my daddy told me this story about my Aunt Karen. Aunt Karen was a flight engineer in the Gulf War and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a bottle of whiskey, a machine gun and a machete. She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't break and then she landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops. She killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she ran out of bullets. Then she killed twenty more with the machete until the blade broke. And then she killed the last ten with her bare hands.” “Good heavens,” said the horrified teacher, “what kind of moral did your daddy tell you from that horrible story?” “Stay the f*@k away from Aunt Karen when she's been drinking.”

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Always check the kids homework The Assignment: Draw a picture showing what you want to be when you grow up. The Result:

Parent Response:

Dear Mrs. Jones, I wish to clarify that I am not now, nor have I ever been, an pole dancer. I work at B &Q and I told my daughter how hectic it was last week when the unexpected snow storm hit. I told her we sold out of every single shovel we had, and then I found one more in the stock room, and that several people were fighting over who would get it. Her picture doesn't show me dancing around a pole. It's supposed to depict me selling the last snow shovel we had at B &Q From now on I will remember to check her homework more thoroughly before she turns it in. Sincerely, Mrs. Smith

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A M a n’s W o r l d One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, but then she turns to me and says, “I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.” I said, “WHAT?! What was that?!” So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... “You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.” She responded to my puzzled look by saying, “Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?” Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went shopping at a big department store and I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, “Lets get a

Sup

pair for each outfit.” We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you, she was so excited. She asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I just replied, “That's fine, honey.” She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. She finally said, “I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier.” I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, “No honey, I don't feel like it.” Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, “WHAT?” I then said, “Honey! I just want you to hold this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.” And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added “Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?” Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....

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Famous quotes on love, sex and marriage “My girlfriend always laughs during sex no matter what she's reading.” Steve Jobs (Founder, Apple Computers) “I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.” Tom Clancy “You know ‘that look’ women get when they want sex? Me neither.” Steve Martin “Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.” Woody Allen “Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.” Rodney Dangerfield “There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among

these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL.” Lynn Lavner “Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.” George Burns “Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.” Billy Crystal “Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.” Robin Williams “See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.” Robin Williams “Did you ever notice the people who are most adamantly against abortions are people you wouldn't want to f*@k in the first place?” George Carlin

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AUSSIES A bloke’s wife goes missing while diving off the West Australian coast. He reports the event, searches fruitlessly and spends a terrible night wondering what could have happened to her. Next morning there's a knock at the door and he is confronted by a couple of policemen, the old Sarge and a younger Constable. The Sarge says, “Mate, we have some news for you, unfortunately some really bad news, but, some good news, and maybe some more good news.” “Well,” says the bloke, “I guess I’d better have the bad news first.” The Sarge says, “I'm really sorry mate, but your wife is dead. Young Bill here found her lying at about five fathoms in a little cleft in the reef. He got a line around her and we pulled her up, but she was dead.” The bloke is natu-

rally pretty distressed to hear of this and has a bit of a turn. But after a few minutes he pulls himself together and asks what the good news is. The Sarge says, “Well when we got your wife up, there were quite a few really good sized crays and a swag of nice crabs attached to her, so we've brought you your share.” He hands the bloke a sugar bag with a couple of nice crays and four or five crabs in it. “Geez thanks. They're bloody beauties. I guess it's an ill wind and all that... so what's the other possible good news?” “Well,” the Sarge says, “if you fancy a quick trip, me and young Bill here get off duty at around 11 o'clock and we're gonna shoot over there and pull her up again!”

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The moral of the story... My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day her little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love

to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said, “I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me.” I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house and ran straight towards my car. Lo and behold, my future father-in-law was standing outside with the entire future family. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, “We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family”.The moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car.

For all your cards, gifts and more in La Cala...

Gorgeous greeting cards for all occasions Unusual giftware and jewellery Helium balloons and partyware Fantastic prices, Great quality Efficient postal service available GHD Hairstraightners

Pink and Black €75

Now Body Shop creams and toiletries Come and see for yourself Open Monday - Friday 9am - 6pm Saturday 9am - 3pm

Tel/Fax: 952 587 549 Three shops away from the Tabac (tobacconist)

Foil Highlights full head, including cut & blow wave From 50€ Cut & Blow dry From €22.50

Opening Hours Tuesday - Friday 10.00 - 18.00 Saturday 10.00 - 14.00

Tel: 952 58 66 47 Hotel Las Piramides Miguel, 43, Fuengirola (Near the new boat play area)

NEWLY REFURBISHED SALON

Ladys Shop All Designer Handbags Fashion Accessories All Ladys clothing from Footwear to Exclusive T-Shirts at Silly Prices Opposite B.P. Garage La Cala Next door to Snack Attack Tel: 952 493 455

That will be 20€ please... On their wedding night, a young bride approached her new husband and asked for €20.00 for their first lovemaking encounter. In his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed. This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 30 years, with him thinking that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed. Arriving home around noon one day, she was surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state. During the next few minutes, he explained that his employer was going through a process of corporate downsizing, and he had been laid off. It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find another position that paid anywhere near what he 'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially

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ruined. Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which showed more than thirty years of steady deposits and interest totaling nearly one million euros. Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the bank which were worth over two million euros and informed him that they were one of the largest depositors in the bank. She explained that for the more than three decades she had ‘charged’ him for sex, These holdings had multiplied and these were the results of her savings and investments. Faced with evidence of cash and investments Worth over three million, her husband was so astounded he could barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out, “If I'd had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you all my business!” That's when she shot him.

Estepona showroom

Wood-block and Laminate ‘Click’ systems Guaranteed Quality Flooring – Fits over existing floors Many designs and Textures to suit your personal Décor Professional Fitting Service For Free estimate and Site Measure: Tel: 637 107 419 www.invoguedesignerfloors.com

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CHRYSLER VOYAGER, AUTO...3,999€ LANDROVER DISCOVERY........9,800€

MERCEDES SL......................9,999€

LAND ROVER DEFENDER......8,999€ CHEROKEE DIESEL 2001.........6800€ PEUGEOT 207 CABRIO 02 ....6,999€ FORD MONDEO, ENGLISH..........790€ MERCEDES A140 PETROL......5,999€ BOMBADIER INCL TRAILER ..1,999€

MONTERO TD, 2001..........10,900€

MERCEDES ML 430, RHD....... 7,999€

KIA SORENTO, 2006..........18,999€

SSANGYONG DIESEL, 2001....8,900€

JET SKI INC. TRAILER........1,350€

BMW 120, 2006, TD.............16,900€

MITSUBISHI L200 TD...........5,999€ CITROEN C3, 2005 ......ONLY 3,999€ HUMMER, MUST SEE.............39,900€

LANDROVER DISCOVERY......11,999€ FREELANDER GIB PLATES....4,990€ HYUNDAI 01 7 SEATS.............4,999€ VOLVO 850/V70 TDI...............4,999€ SUZUKI VITARA DIESEL........11,600€ MITSUBISHI MONTEREY........4,999€ SAAB CABRIOLET AUTO.........7,999€

CARS FOR RENT FROM...........199€

CHEROKEE 99 TURBODIESEL 3999€ CORVETTE 94, SPANISH ......12,999€ KAWASAKI 99, 1500cc ..........4,999€ BMW X5 TD 2005 ..............24,900€

BRITISH PLATED 24,900€ or 29.999€ SPANISH PLATED

Funny five Minutes Three Aussies were working on a highrise building project - Steve, Bruce and Bluey. Steve falls off and is killed instantly. As the ambulance takes the body away, Bruce says, “Someone should go and tell his wife.” Bluey says, “OK, I'm pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I'll do it.” Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of Fosters Beer. Bruce says, “Where did you get that, Bluey?” “Steve's wife gave it to me,” Bluey replies. “That's unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you the beer?” “Well not exactly,” Bluey says. “When she answered the door, I said to her “You must be Steve's widow.” She said, “No, I'm not a widow.” and I said, “I'll bet you a case of Fosters you are!”

n ligatio No ob n tio quota

The other day I needed to pay a visit to the public toliet, so I found a public toilet that had two cubicles. One of the doors was locked. So I went into the other one, closed the door, dropped my trousers and sat down. A voice came from the cubicle next to me: “Hello mate, how are you doing?” Although I thought that it was a bit strange, I didn't want to be rude, so I replied “Not too bad thanks.” After a short pause, I heard the voice again “So, what are you up to?” Again I answered, somewhat reluctantly, “Just having a quick poo... How about yourself?” The next thing I heard him say was “sorry mate, I'll have to call you back. I've got some idiot in the cubicle next to me answering everything I say.”

New Showroom La Cala de Mijas

Tailor made furniture packages & make over solutions

Are you struggling for ideas, time or patience for your property? Take the stress out of what should be a wonderful new phase in your life. New or existing properties, we can help you. Call Dilys for a no-obligation quotation, from dressing one window to a whole furniture package. Our showroom is situated between the BP petrol station and the Farmacia, next door to Sr. Nick’s. Tel/Fax: 952 494 155. Dilys: 600 583 673. Juliette: 678 539 365 Web: www.whitedesignco.com. Email: info@whitedesignco.com CLM©2008

GUARANTEED RENTAL FOR 1 YEAR - INQUIRE FOR DETAILS

Dibleys Tapas

Bar

La Cala de Mijas, Opposite the church. Tel: 952 493 042

Totally Refurbished and Outside Courtyard Tapas 12pm - 3pm & 6pm - 10pm English and Spanish mix Saturday - Live Entertainment Steve Summers Sunday - Sunday Roast only. 12pm - 10pm Beef/pork/lamb €8 Chicken €7

Incorporating

to go...

Sandwich Bar

Filled baguettes, sandwiches and salads to eat in or take away. 10am - 3 pm Tuna and sweetcorn Bacon, lettuce and tomato Brie, salami and sun dried tomatoes Mozzarella, tomato and basil Chicken and Mayo Jane andCoronation Steve formerly from ‘to go’ chicken and many more... and Claire and Gary formerly from Captains Bar

Ring to pre-order: 952 493 042

Snack Attack Cafe - Bar Due to popular demand Snack Attack is now open on Sundays 10am - 4pm for Breakfast, Lunch and our popular ROAST DINNER 2 courses for only 10 €

Open from 7.30 for Quality Breakfast, Lunch and Sandwiches

GREAT VALUE BREAKFAST ONLY 3.95€

LUNCH TIME SPECIALS (changes daily) KITCHEN NOW OPEN UNTIL 6PM Early EVENING TAPAS AVAILABLE Everything avaialble as take away for days out Why not take a baguette of your choice to the Local 26 Jardín Botánico, airport? La Cala de Mijas NOW IN OUR 6 T H YEAR Tel: 952 493 184

On the Sunny Side of the Street

CHI ESE RESTAURA T

Takeaway. Fresh Baguettes, Paninis, Pies, Kebabs, Burgers and Pastries. Mon - Sat 11.30 - 15.30 and 18.30 - 22.30 C/Torremolinos, La Cala. Tel: 618 181 507

The Sussex Bar

SPECIAL LUNCHTIME MENU 12PM - 4PM STARTERS Spring Roll, Special Salad, Chicken and Sweetcorn/Tomato/Hot and Sour Soup or Spare Ribs.

MAIN COURSE

Beef with Blackbean/Oyster/Chinese Mushroom and Bamboo/Curry or Chicken with Cashew Nuts/Sweet and Sour/Curry or Prawns with Vegetables or Sweet and Sour Fish (Hake)

RICE AND NOODLES

Special House Fried Rice, Boiled Rice or Noodles with Soya Bean Sprouts or Chips

DESSERTS

Food served 10am -10pm. Sunday Lunch 1pm - 9pm. Thursday quiz night, Friday darts league, Saturdays Karaoke. La Cortijera. La Cala.

Coffee, Tea, Ice Cream, Cream Caramel or Fruit Main restaurant serving usual delicacies 6pm - 12pm

Jardin Botanico, Local 16, La Cala de Mijas. Tel: 952 599 236. Mob: 685 578 743

Friendly Atmosphere, Family Bar, Children Welcome

KID’S MEAL DEAL €3.89 -

Choose from Sausage, Hot dog, Chicken nuggets,

Fish fingers or Burger all served with Chips and including Soft Drink, Ice Cream or Chock Stick.

BIGGEST ROAST ON THE COAST 2 MEAL DEAL - Choose any two meals for just €10 (Monday to Saturdays) Buy two glasses of wine €4 or buy the bottle for just €5.99

Bingo and Quiz Nights (phone for details) Two large, sunny terraces. Pool Table Internet access All live sport shown. Happy Hour 5pm-7pm Monday - Friday Las Adelfas No.11 Urb. Los Claveles

Tel: 952 493 763

bars and restaurant guide

Great places to eat and drink in La Cala

HONG KONG

Sandi

Mondays

Your Entertainment Guide Thursdays

Quiz and Bingo - Shenanigans, Riviera del Sol. Under 12’s eat free Mon, Thur, Sat with paying adult - Menu of the day, 2 courses €11,95. The Far Isle, Riviera del Sol.

Tuesdays Quiz Night - 9.30, Bunkers Bar Bistro, Miraflores Driving Range. Karaoke - Fools bar. El Zoco, Calahonda.

Wednesdays

El Zoco, Calahonda

Quiz Night - Captains Bar, La Cala. Strictly Come Dancing - Dancing Lessons. 2pm Shenanigans, Riviera del Sol. Live Entertainment & Quiz night (Entertainment every other Wednesday) Shaggys, Fuengirola Port, Courtyard.

Steak Night - Eat as much as you can REDUCED to €19.95 with Gary Young Live. Vista del Mar. Quiz night - JJ’s Bar, Riviera del Sol. Quiz Night - Sussex Bar, La Cala. Karaoke - Fools Bar, El Zoco, Calahonda. Karaoke - Sisters Bar, The Strip, Calahonda.

Fridays Karaoke - “Paul the Bear” Shenanigans, 9.30pm Riviera del Sol. Bingo - Captains bar, La Cala. Darts League - Sussex Bar, La Cortijera, La Cala. Live Music - Trafalgar Bar, El Zoco. Fish and Chip Night - The Far Isle, Riviera del Sol. Continued on page 55

Tel: 666 834 616 Open everyday. Top floor El Zoco. Calahonda OFFICIAL AGENT FOR I TER ATIO AL SPORTS SHOOTI G CLUB FULLY INCLUSIVE PACKAGE €95. FOR MORE INFORMATION CONTACT: 666 834 616

great places to eat, drink and be entertained.

W h a t ’s O n

Tel: 952 932 519 41 & 42, 1ST FLOOR CENTRO COMMERCIAL LOS JARALES, CALAHONDA

Harrys Sports Bar usinessand ropertydirect.com

All live sports and premiere league football. Six TV’s and big screen. Full menu, Sunday roast and homemade tapas. Large sun terrace. Open 10amlate, seven days a week. Upstairs Los Jarales.

Calahonda

Sisters Bar

Friendly family bar with good food, tapas, live entertainment, karaoke and sports. Open seven days a week. The Strip, Calahonda Tel: 952 939 579

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Trying to sell your bar or restaurant? Are estate agent fees pricing you out of the market? Why not sell direct, cut out the middle man and put the cash in your pocket!

Tel: 670 954 396 businessandpropertydirect.com

great places to eat and drink

THURSDAY KARAOKE 8.30pm SATURDAYS CABARET 8.30pm

X X

Los Jarales

Play world famous Texas Holdʼem Poker. From beginners to pros, we have games to suit everyone

Villa Paradiso - Open since 1989

Calypso

Small friendly bar. Daily sport. Karaoke on Tues and Thursday. All football matches shown. First floor El Zoco (corner) Tel: 952 935 340

Italian Restaurant

Italian restaurant. Taste the genuine Italian food in attractive decor. Open seven days a week, 1pm till late. C.C. El Zoco, first floor, Sitio de Calahonda. Tel: 952 932 042

Sit ‘n’ Go

Trafalgar Cocktail Bar

Sit ‘n’ Go sports lounge broadcasting all the weekly action in comfortable, friendly surroundings. Open daily from 1pm until midnight. Wi-fi internet access. Frontline C.C.Calypso.

For before and after dinner drinks. Live music Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Open every evening until late. El Zoco First floor, Sito de Calahonda. Mijas Costa.

The

BOAT HOUSE Mijas Costa’s Premier Fish and Chips Restaurant and Take Away Excellent Quality Fish and Chips Large portions Enjoy your meal in our large fully air-conditioned restaurant or outside ‘al fresco’ on our large terrace Large selection of desserts

NOW OPEN ON WEDNESDAY, THURSDAY, FRIDAY AND SATURDAY LUNCHTIMES 12PM TILL 2PM WITH A LUNCHTIME SPECIAL MENU.

OPE EVERY IGHT 6.00 - 10.00 ABOVE SUPERSOL, C.C. EL ZOCO, CALAHO DA

TEL: 952 930 148

great places to eat and drink El Zoco, Calahonda

Fools Bar

Los Jarales

Sports - Cafe Bar

ALL LIVE SPORTS SHOWN ON TWO LARGE SCREENS FOUR LIVE MATCHES ON SATURDAYS FULL MENU AVAILABLE TILL LATE SUNDAY LUNCH, PORK, CHICKEN OR BEEF 2 COUSES €8 BREAKFAST SPECIAL €5 SPIRIT AND MIXERS €3 ALL DAY 7 DAYS A WEEK MENU OF THE DAY €5 LARGE SUNNY TERRACE FOR BOOKINGS CALL: 634 670 553 C.C Los Jarales, Mijas Costa

great places to eat and drink

THE PIT STOP

Calahonda

Full Menu All live sports and premier league football Open 6 days a week 9.30 until late Avenida de Espana (The Strip) Uncle Alex, Irene and staff welcome you to come and enjoy yourself in a friendly family bar.

Cocktail Bar

ADVERTISE YOUR BAR OR RESTAURANT HERE Telephone: 663 061 669

Just â&#x201A;Ź35 a month

Buying or Selling a Business on the Costa del Sol ?

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CALL US NOW!!! 952 477 874 or 647 830 885 info@fiestaproperty.com www.fiestaproperty.com

Golden Sun

CHARLEY’S BAR & RESTAURANT

Traditional Chinese Food. Takeaway menu. Special lunch menu only €6.95. Open 12.00-16.00 and 18.30-24.00 everyday. Riviera Commercial. Tel: 952 931 737

Papa Luigi

Traditional Italian food. Fresh pasta, wood burning pizza oven, Open every day 12 - 11. Riviera Commercial, Tel: 952 934 496

UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT SUNDAY ROAST with Fresh Veg & Yorkshire Pud & Dessert for just 10€ Adults & 4.50€ Children NEW DAY & EVENING MENUS & DAILY SPECIALS SNACKS & TAKEAWAY AVAILABLE ALL DAY OPEN EVERYDAY SUNNY TERRACE, SEA VIEWS & SKY SPORTS. LAGER: 2.50€, SPIRITS & MIXERS €4.50

Tel: 615 315 605

1ST FLOOR RIVIERA COMMERCIAL (NEAR THE CHEMISTS), RIVIERA DEL SOL, MIJAS COSTA.

bars and restaurant guide

Great places to eat and drink in Riviera del Sol & Miraflores

Family Bar Internet Quizzes and Karaoke Live Entertainment Pool Tables Games Machines Open for Food Closed Tuesdays Beachside, Riviera del Sol Tel: 952 935 676

Freshly Cooked Versatile Menu. Warm Friendly Atmosphere. Above Shenanigans, Beachside, Riviera del Sol Tel: 952 935 039. Closed Tuesdays.

JJ’s Bar

Bunkers Bar Bistro

RIVIERA DEL SOL SMALL FRIENDLY BAR

En Un Rincon De La Boca

Specialists in Argentinian grilled meat. Take away. Open daily 10.00 - 23.00. Closed Tuesdays. Las Terrazas de Miraflores Tel: 952 930 649

WITH LARGE SUNNY TERRACE AND FANTASTIC VIEWS OVER THE MED. LIVE SPORT FUN QUIZ NIGHTS - THURS MUSIC NIGHTS Avenida del Golf

Breakfast, brunches and evening dinner. Open 7 days a week from 10am. Wi-fi internet connection. Terrace available for private functions. Miraflores Driving Range. Tel: 952 939 381

Riviera del sol JJ’s Bar

Great places to eat and drink in Riviera del Sol & Miraflores

the terrace.

bars and restaurant guide

Beautiful panoramic sea and beach views from

Fine Indian Cuisne Restaurant and Take Away Open from 6pm - Midnight CLMÂŠ2008

Tel: 902 463 426 IND IAN

Mughal Village Urb. Torrenueva, Mijas Costa Fine Indian Cuisine. Restaurant and Take Away Open from 6pm - Midnight Tel: 902 463 426

Front line Fuengirola port. Open all day. 6 days a week. Pool table, Darts and Sky Sports.

ADVERTISE YOUR BAR OR RESTAURANT HERE

Everything Direct from London EAT IN OR TAKE AWAY

Pie, Mash and Liquer Jellied Eels Dressed Crab Whelks Peeled Prawns and much more...

Just

€20 a

Open Tues - Sun 11am - 6pm NOW SUPPLYING WHOLESALE for details call: Tel: 672 028 226

Telephone:

month

663 061 669

La Cr es a ñ ta Pe

The rural bar with the great atmosphere

Great food and Spanish tapas at Spanish prices!

Selection of fine wines and local beers.

Open 12 - Late 7 days Tel: 662 607 784 Between Hotel Byblos and Venta la Morena

Regular live entertainment and karaoke in English and Spanish 9 people minbus available €3 per person each way. Call for details. CAMINO DE COIN HOTEL RODINASON

VENTA LA MORENA

RIVER BED

bars and restaurant guide

Fuengirola Port

Great places to eat and drink in Fuengirola

Cockles English Seafood

Nemos Bar

SPECIALS IGHTS Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Sunday

CHEFS SPECIALS - 3 or 4 extra dishes to satisfy your palate MEXICA IGHT - A selection of traditional Mexican dishes MID WEEK ROAST - Roast meats with all the trimmings CHEFS SPECIALS - 3 or 4 extra dishes to satisfy your palate FISH A D CHIP IGHT - Your favourite battered cod, SU DAY ROAST-

homemade chips and mushy peas Roast meats with all the trimmings

OR CHOOSE FROM OUR REGULAR ME U

Dishes include: Chargrilled ribs & steaks, Salmon & Swordfish Lamb cutlets & thick pork chops or simply delve into pie corner. COME I BETWEE 6 - 7 A D GET 10% OFF YOUR MEAL COME I BETWEE 6 -7 1 CHILD U DER 10 PER ADULT EATS FREE FROM KIDS ME U COME I BETWEE 7 - 10 HALF BOTTLE HOUSE WI E PER PERSO WITH 2 OR 3 COURSE MEAL

OPENING TIMES Sunday - Friday 18.00 - 22.30 Closed Saturdays Tel: 902 276 967 902 BRO WNS Restaurant and Take Away Riviera del Sol

Things That Make You Go Mmmm Strawberry and White Chocolate Cheesecake Ingredients

75g shortbread biscuits 50g unsalted butter, softened 200g melted white chocolate 300g full or medium fat soft cream cheese 200g fromage frais 225g strawberries, roughly chopped

Serves 6. Ready in 20 minutes Method

Estepona Port

1. Put the shortbread biscuits in a plastic bag and bash with a rolling pin until they resemble breadcrumbs. Mix the biscuit

LA PERLA PUERTO ESTEPO A

Win a meal for 2

SEA LEVEL EAT IN OR TAKE AWAY

English Breakfast from 8.30am Sandwiches Baguettes Croissants and much more... FRIDAY IGHTS FROM 7PM FISH & CHIPS - COD I BEER BATTER A D MUSHY PEAS.

Closed Thursdays 46

crumbs together with the softened butter and press firmly onto the base and sides of a 2 0 c m springform tin. Refrigerate until needed. Melt the white chocolate in a bowl in the microwave and set aside until needed. 2. Beat together the cream cheese and fromage frais until smooth and thick. Add the strawberries to the cheese mixture with the melted white chocolate and mix. Spoon the cheesecake filling into the biscuit case. Level the top and chill for about 4 hours until set. Enjoy!

Vista del Mar are offering Costa Link readers the chance to win a meal for two up to the value of €50 at their fantastic restaurant, situated at Beachside Miraflores.

To win all you have to do is answer the following question. The winner will be picked at random from received entries. What night is the ‘all you can eat steak night’ held at Vista del Mar? Email your answer to: info@costalinkmagazine.com

Your Entertainment Guide Sundays

Cont. from page 41

Fridays cont.

Lucky Balls Competition - Number drawn eats for free! Vista del Mar, beachside, Riviera de Sol

Saturdays

Nueva Andalucia

Cabaret - Michelle Allan 9.30pm Shenanigans, Riviera del Sol. Cabaret Night - Live music plus 3 course meal only €25. Vista del Mar. Traditional Pie, Mash and Liquer during the day, Karaoke in the evening. - Sisters Bar, The Strip, Calahonda. Live music - Trafalgar bar, El Zoco, Calahonda. All Live Sports - 5.30 - 9.45 Bunkers Bar Bistro, Miraflores Driving Range.

Sunday Lunch - 1 till 6 with Gary Young on vocals, 2 till 5. Vista del Mar. Live Entertainment - Shaggys, Fuengirola Port, Courtyard. Sunday Roast - 1pm - 9pm. Bingo and Quiz - 9.30. Bunkers, Miraflores.

WANT TO ADVERTISE YOUR EVENTS? Advertise in the Costa Link Bar and Restaurant guide and receive free listings of your events and entertainment. Call: 663 061 669

Freshly Cooked Continental Deli Style Food and Desserts

Sunday roast Menu of the day 9€ Mon - Sat Fresh smoothies and juices All day breakfast Outside catering Open 7 days a week Home made cakes to order Sandwich bar Home made desserts Take away service available Outside sunny terrace

WxÄ|@|v|Éâá Tel: 952 907 876 Calle Califa No 1, Edif. Maestranza, Nueva Andalucia, Marbella.

great places to eat, drink and be entertained

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Urb. El Pilar, Edif. Benapilar. Locales 8-10, Estepona. Exit Km 168 (Opposite the Crowne Plaza Hotel) Tel: 952 88 36 66

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We specialise in serving our customers the highest quality food, w service, large portions, good value and most i FROM SPRING OUR BEAUTIFUL GARDEN TERRACES ARE OPEN -

WE ARE THE CELEBRATIES CHOIC

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SIR ALAN SUGAR

THEO PHAPHITIS

THOMAS LAW

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C/Jose de Espronceda, Edif. Mrc 7, Locale 32, ‘La Campana’, (opp. La Torre Andalucia Hotel) Nueva Andalucia, Marbella. Tel: 952 81 79 89

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d, whether you choose to eat in or take away. A friendly, efficient st important of all - GREAT COMFORT FOOD!!! N - TRENDY...BUZZY...ENJOYABLE. OUTDOOR EATING AT IT’S BEST

OICE FOR GREAT FISH AND CHIPS

SHAYNE WARD

PAT RICE

CASINO

San Pedro

CILLA BLACK

ALAN DAVIES

N340

Marbella

Health Problems Barry returned from a doctor's visit one day and told his wife, Carolyn, that the doctor said he only had 24 hours to live. Wiping away her tears, he asked her to make love with him. Of course, she agreed and they made passionate love. Six hours later, Barry went to her again, and said, “Honey, now I only have 18 hours left to live. Maybe we could make love again?” Carolyn agreed and again they made love. Later, Barry was getting into bed when he realized he now had only eight hours of life left. He touched Carolyn's shoulder and said, “Honey? Please? Just one more time before I die.” She agreed, then afterward she rolled over and fell asleep. Barry, however, heard the clock ticking in his head, and he tossed and turned until he was down to only four more hours. He tapped his wife on the shoulder to wake her up. “Honey, I only have four hours left! Could we...?” His wife sat up abruptly, turned to him and said, “Listen Barry, I'm not being funny... but I have to get up in the

morning and you don't.” Mr. Smith goes to the doctor's office to collect his wife's test results. Receptionist: “I'm sorry, Sir, but there has been a bit of a mix-up and we have a problem. When we sent the samples from your wife to the lab, the samples from another Mrs. Smith were sent as well and we are now uncertain which one is your wife's. Frankly, that's either bad or terrible.” Mr. Smith: “What do you mean?” Receptionist: “Well, one Mrs. Smith has tested positive for Alzheimer disease and the other for AIDS. We can't tell which is your wife.” Mr. Smith: “That's terrible! Can we do the test over?” Receptionist: “Normally, yes. But you have private health insurance, and they won't pay for these expensive tests more than once.” Mr. Smith: “Well, what am I supposed to do now?” Receptionist: “The doctor recommends that you drop your wife off in the middle of town. If she finds her way home, don't sleep with her.”

SolScreen Professional window tinting Sun pouring through your windows? Bleaching your furnishings? Annoying glare? Privacy problems? Call SolScreen - we can help SolScreen supply & install a complete range of Solar Control, U.V. protection, Privacy, Decorative or Security Window Films. Also available, the latest technologically advanced, practically invisible solar control window films.

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Gracie’s Family Bar and Restaurant

Fantastic single unit Cafe Bar located in Fuengirola Port. Lots of passing trade with plenty of seating inside and out. Low rent for the area. Ideal starter bar! Price €25,950

Perfect opportunity for a family or two couples. Located in Fuengirola Marina, it offers amazing views and seating for up to 90 guests. This lovely airy bar comes with 3 months free rent. Price €59,750

The Marina Bar

GJ’s Fish Restaurant & Takeaway

Successful well established bar popular with tourists and locals alike. This large double unit would be suited to those with experience in the trade. Price €39,950

Well established, fully air conditioned, restaurant located in the heart of Alhaurin el Grande. Popular with both Spanish and English customers an opportunity not to be missed. Price €79,950

Three Bed House

Land for Sale

Beautiful three bed, two bath house for sale in Puerto de la Torre. With stunning rooftop garden, amazing views, Jacuzzi and splash pool and the added bonus of a separate studio apartment. Price €350,000

22,000sqm plot for sale, with permission to build in El Chorro. Stunning views of the mountains. Just 5 minutes from the lakes and 5 minutes from the local station. Price €60,000

usinessand

Trying to sell your business or property? Are estate agent fees pricing you out of the market?

ropertydirect.com Why not sell direct, cut out the middle man and put the cash in your pocket!

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Puzzle It Out

Solutions on page 98

Quick Crossword Across

Down

1.Second sign of the zodiac (6) 4.Professional cook (4) 7.Desert plants (5) 8.Arm bone (5) 10.Pressing (6) 12.Sprocket (3) 14.Beverage (3) 15.Provide evidence for (6) 18.Proprietor (5) 19. Saying (5) 20. Profit (4) 21. Ravine (6)

1.Diplomacy (4) 2.Unsure (9) 3.Merge (5) 5.Search for food (6) 6.Female relative (4) 9.Essential (9) 11.Fish trap (3) 13.Powerful (6) 15.Halo (4) 16.Crown-like headdress (5) 17.Blood vessel (4)

Picture Puzzles

Sudoku

Can you work out what common phrases or sayings these pictures represent?

Say What You See...

Knee Light 60

Ground feet feet feet feet feet feet

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Does your passport need renewing? Has it been Lost or stolen? offers: • Passport Application Forms • Advice • Documentation and Application Form Checks • Bio-Metric photograph checks • Daily Courier Service to the British Consulate in Madrid

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Teachers Tales During one of her daily classes a teacher trying to teach good manners, asked her students the following question: “Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?” Michael said, “Just a minute I have to go pee.” The teacher responded by saying, “That would be rude and impolite. What about you Paul, how would you say it?” Paul said, “I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back.” “That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table. And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?” “I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to meet after dinner.” The teacher fainted. The 8th grade science teacher, Mrs Parks, asked her class, “Which human body part

increases to ten times its size when stimulated?” No one answered until little Mary stood up angrily and said, “You should not be asking eighth-graders a question like that! I'm going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will then fire you!” With a sneer on her face, she then sat back down. Mrs Parks ignored her and asked the question again: “Which body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?” Little Mary's mouth fell open. She said to those around her, “Boy is she going to get in big trouble!” The teacher continued to ignore her and asked the class, “Anybody?” Finally, Billy stood up, looked around nervously, and replied, 'The pupil of the eye.” “Very good, Billy,” said Mrs Parks. Then, turning to Mary, she said “As for you, young lady, I have three things to say. One, you have a dirty mind. Two, you didn't read your homework. And three, one day you are going to be very, very disappointed.”

TILE SHOWROOM AND WAREHOUSE

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Tile ranges buy 2 3 for the price of 2 2m Get third free! Calle Bilbao No. 4. San Pedro de Alcantara Email: hardrocktiles@hotmail.com

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Household goods Cars Boats Motorcycles Full or part loads Secure warehousing Packaging materials and boxes for sale

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C/ Sagitario 6, Jardines de Gamonal Blq 7, 29631 Arroyo de la Miel IF YOU WISH TO BUY, SELL OR RENT LONG TERM FROM TORREMOLINOS TO ELVIRIA, CALL US NOW.

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OTHERS AVAILABLE 3 BEDROOMS, SUPER COMMUNITY, CLOSE TO SHOPS, WALKING DISTANCE TO BEACH. URGENT SALE.

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You’ll never walk alone St. Peter was manning the Pearly Gates when 40 Liverpool fans showed up. Never having seen anyone from Liverpool at heaven's door, St. Peter said he would have to check with God. After hearing the news, God instructed him to admit the ten most virtuous from the group. A few minutes later, Saint Peter returned to God breathless and said, “They're gone.” “What? All of the Liverpool fans are gone?” asked God. “No” replied Saint Peter “The Pearly Gates!” Three men, a Scouser, a Manc and a Rasta all in the maternity ward waiting for their partners to give birth. The midwife comes out and tells them congratulations, they're all fathers of beautiful healthy boys, however unfortunately they've run out of the name tags, and the babies have been mixed up, so if they could each go in and

identify their sons from any family resemblance etc. The Manc wants to go first, so in he goes and comes out with a black baby The Rasta looks a bit confused, “Excuse me”, he said, “but don't you think he's likely to be mine?” “Probably”, said the Manc, “but one of them in there's a scouser, and I'm takin' no chances!!!”

Please tell them you saw them in costa Link magazine when responding to adverts - Thank you

SPANISH NUMBER PLATES FOR FOREIGN PLATED VEHICLES Transfer of ownership for Spanish cars Driving license exchange English - Spanish Duplicates of lost car documents Finance and legal problems on vehicles N.I.E. numbers/residencia I.T.V. pick up and delivery service CLM©2008

Tel: 952 593 500 or Mob: 616 673 556 C. Camilo Jose Cela, Alondra Bldg (Opposite the Zoo entrance) Fuengirola 68

Designer and Character Childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Clothing and Toys

Including: Oshkosh, Timberland, Juicy, Ralph Lauren, High School Musical, Dora the Explorer, Thomas the Tank Engine and much more...

Now Open! Urb Jardin Botanico 19

Tel: 952 493 086 Email: koolkidzspain@gmail.com

INGRID BATIK FASHION COME AND SEE OUR UNIQUE RANGE OF ORIGINAL HAND PAINTED BATIK CLOTHING FROM INDONESIA

We cater for all sizes with our extensive range of beach and evening wear, ladies dresses, jumpsuits, caftans, kimonos, ponchos, sarongs and lots more.

JUST ARRIVED Our new spring collection for children & teenagers Plaza de la Cala, Mijas Costa Tel: 619 178 194 www.ingridbatikfashion.com

TRAIN FOR A CAREER AS A

WEIGHT-LOSS COACH

Patio doors secured, Safes opened and fitted, Locks upgraded, Changed key holding. Fully registered. Credit cards now taken. Call Bob and Debbie on:

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SATELLITE INSTALLATIONS SATELLITE, COMMUNITY, SURROUND SYSTEMS ETC. INSTALLED AND MAINTAINED T.V, VIDEO AND ELECTRONIC REPAIRS IN HOUSE. MOBILE PHONE SALES, SIMMS, TOP-UPS AND CALLING CARDS. WIRELESS INTERNET AND HOTSPOT

LOCAL 10, DOÑA LOLA, OPP. EL ZOCO (CALAHONDA) TEL: 952 93 91 98 MOB: 607 383 578 EMAIL: reeceelectronics@ya.com

NINTENDOS WANTED FOR CASH All Nintendo DS and Wii games and consoles bought and sold. Best prices paid. See main advert page 16. Call: 678 43 00 92

This exciting course is mainly distance learning,with a two day practical element (workshop) which will be held at a venue convenient to you. Run by the Real-Goals Academy the course is Indemnity Insurance approved. Call now for your free Information Pack

(0034) 972 52 18 41 or email: lifeway@hotmail.es

TRANSLATION SERVICES LEGAL HOSPITAL WEBSITES REAL ESTATE

Call Celia on: 645 043 230

Pattypaws Dog grooming & Pet Supplies

Dog and Cat Grooming Professional English Groomer All breeds, bathed, clipped and scissored to breed standard or individual requirements. Tel: 615 044 588 Avenida del Golf, Riviera del Sol pattypawsgrooming@hotmail.com “For your mucky pups and shaggy

GREAT VALUE ADVERTISING 1/8 page advert only €20 A MONTH for a limited period 70

PROPERTY

MANAGEMENT S.L Properties urgently required in all areas Approved tenants waiting. Long/short term rentals solutions. Tel 952 939 186 Mob 672 100 803 Transport to and from airport aranged from as little as 30€ each way

Ye l l o w 2 4 A man goes to the doctor's, feeling a little ill. The doctor throughly checks him over and says, “I’m so sorry to say but I have some very bad news. You have a rare condition called Yellow 24, a really nasty virus. It's called Yellow 24 because it rapidly eats away at your blood cells turning your blood yellow and you usually only have 24 hours to live. There's no known cure, so I suggest you go home and enjoy your final precious moments on earth.” The man trudges home to his wife and breaks the news. Distraught, they decide how to spend their last day together and she asks him to go to the bingo with her that evening as he's never been there with her before although she has always wanted it to be something they

did together They arrive at the bingo and with his first card, he gets four corners and wins €35.Then, with the same card, he gets a line and wins €320. Then he gets the full house and wins €1000. Then the National Grid comes up and he wins that too winning a massive €380,000. The bingo caller gets him up on stage and says, “Son, I've been here 20 years and I've never seen anyone win four corners, a line, the full house and the national grid on the same card. You must be the luckiest man on Earth!” “Lucky?!!!” he screamed. “Lucky? I'll have you know I've got Yellow 24.” “F*** me,” says the bingo caller. “You've only just won the bloody raffle as well !!”

Golf Tips And Tricks How Old Before They Play? by Mark Sibley of Miraflores Golf Academy As a professional coach, the question from adult golfers ‘how old should my children be before they can play golf?’ is a common one. My oldest daughter, Harleigh, first picked up a golf club at two years old and has kept playing ever since. My motto has always been ‘Today’s juniors are tomorrows golfers’ so it is important to make sure if they have an interest and ability in the game that it is developed in the right way and should not be left to develop itself. The younger the better, those who pick up the clubs at an early age seem to develop a fearless approach and confidence which is a great base for the development of the swing. A belief that they will strike the ball every time they swing and surprise when things go wrong. Once you have established they have an interest in golf get them to a qualified coach, look for the group systems available. One to one for a beginner is boring I have been told by a junior “it’s just like school”. At Miraflores Golf Academy we run a group format monthly test system, with a coloured progress ladder and pass certificate, designed to take the junior golfer from beginner to a nine handicap player. It is popular, giving the juniors goals in progress through the system and a chance to meet other junior players through group format coaching. Our system at Miraflores Academy works, our three best pupils of 2008 moving from handicaps in the 20’s to low teens and our first team out against other juniors from all over the Costa del Golf taking 3rd place, but more importantantly they enjoy playing golf. If you would like to find out more call in or telephone David Bright, junior coach and organizer. How old before they play is a dif-

MARK SIBLEY

PGA GOLF PROFESSIONAL

UK QUALIFIED 15 YEARS OF COACHING EXPERIENCE LESSONS FOR ALL LEVELS OF GOLFER BEGINNER TO PLAYING PROFESSIONAL LESSON PACKAGES AVAILABLE NOW BASED AT THE MIRAFLORES GOLF ACADEMY NOW WITH FULLY STOCKED PROFESSIONAL SHOP MIRAFLORES DRIVING RANGE & GOLF ACADEMY. S/N RIVIERA DEL SOL, 29649 MIJAS COSTA. TEL: 952 933 729 OR 678 833 736

Golf Academy ficult question, so if they show interest give them a go. If they show talent get them a coach you may have a great social player or you could have the next Tiger Woods!!!

Golfing About

A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife," he tells the doctor, "when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows. We went to look for it, and I noticed one of the cows had something white in its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough, there was my wife's golf ball stuck right in the cow's butt. That's when I made my mistake." "What did you do?" asks the doctor. "Well, as I was standing there holding up the tail, I yelled to my wife, 'Hey, this looks like yours!'"

www.costalinkmagazine.com

WINTER 2009: 1ST FEB TO 31ST MAY 18 HOLES 65.00€ 9 HOLES 34.00€

BUGGY BUGGY

30.00€ 15.00€

SUMMER 2009: 1ST JUNE TO 3OTH SEPT 18 HOLES 42.00€ 9 HOLES 25.00€

BUGGY BUGGY

30.00€ 15.00€

SPECIAL OFFER BUGGY RENTAL AFTER 12:00 (HRS) 15.00€

SANTA MARIA GOLF & COUNTRY CLUB Urb. Elviria, C.N.340 Km. 192 29604 Marbella (Malaga) Tel: 952 831 036 Fax: 952 834 797 E-Mail: caddymaster@santamariagolfclub.com Website: www.santamariagolfclub.com

Imagine living here... Beaver (Oklahoma, USA) Shitlingthorpe (Yorkshire, UK) Bastard (Norway) Twatt (Orkney, UK) Arsoli (Lazio, Italy) Muff (Northern Ireland) Wankie (Zimbabwe) Climax (Colorado, USA) Nobber (Donegal, Ireland) Lickey End (West Midlands, UK) Fukum (Yemen) Lord Berkeley's Knob (Sutherland, Scotland) Dildo (Newfoundland, Canada) Turdo (Romania) Seymen (Turkey)

Brown Willy (Cornwall,UK) Wanks River (Nicaragua) Beaver Head (Idaho, USA) Shag Island (Indian Ocean) Middle Intercourse Island (Australia) Wankie Colliery (Zimbabwe) Chinaman's Knob (Australia) Wet Beaver Creek (Australia) Tittybong (Australia) Pis Pis River (Nicaragua) Dikshit (India) Dog Dyke (Midlands,UK) Pratt's Bottom (Kent, UK) Jacks Bush (Salisbury, UK) Black Charlies Opening (Tasmania, Australia)

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Email: fitnessstudio@terra.es

CLASSES FOR ALL AGES

THE DRIVE IN CAR CARE CENTRE Jardin Botanico. Ctra. N340 Km 200, Mijas Costa Beneath Autos 2002

From

Hand Car Wash €9 Engine Oil & Filter Change From €39

Tyres & Exhausts CALL US FOR A QUOTE

ITV

Preparation & Appointments €99 all included

Mechanical Ser vice & Repairs CALL US FOR A QUOTE

Don’t Delay Call us Today

610 75 00 76

Email: the-drive-in@hotmail.com www.thedriveinspain.com

Lawyer v’s Cop A London lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a Glasgow copper. He thinks that he is far smarter than the cop because he is a lawyer from London and is certain that he has a better education then any Jock cop. He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the Glasgow cops expense! The Glasgow cop says, “Licence and registration, please.” The London lawyer looks innocently at the cop and says, “What on earth for?” The Glasgow cop replies, “Ye didnae come to a complete stop at the stop sign.” The lawyer says, “I slowed right down, and no one was coming.” The Glasgow cop sighs and says, “Ye still didnae come to a complete stop. Licence and registration, please.” The lawyer, get-

ting even cockier now, says, “What's the difference?” The Glasgow cop says, “The difference is, ye huvte to come to complete stop, that's the law, licence and registration, please!” The lawyer with a smug grin on his face replies, “I tell you what, if you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my licence and registration and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket.” The Glasgow cop says, “Sounds fair. Exit your vehicle please Sir.” As the London lawyer climbs out of his car, the Glasgow cop takes out his baton and starts beating the tripe out of the lawyer and says “Dae ye want me to stop, or just slow doon?”

MRS CHIPPY

TRADITIONAL FISH & CHIP SHOP IN ALHAURIN EL GRANDE (OPPosite. MERCADONA)

PROPER CHIP SHOP CHIPS €5 MENU - FISH & CHIPS, ANY PIE & CHIPS, €1 MENU - INC. SAUSAGES , FISHCAKES, PEAS ETC. OPENING HOURS :lUNCHTIMES: tUES -SAT 12.30-2.30 EVENINGS: MON-SAT 17.30 -22.00. TAKE AWAY OR EAT IN. TELEPHONE ORDERS WELCOME JUST RING: 666 954 434

Flaming Hot Offer 1/4 page adverts for just €37.50 a month when you book for 3 months or more. Tel: 663 061 669 78

Jus t €37.50 a

month

SKY DIGIBOX REPAIRS DON’T JUST BUY A NEW DIGIBOX LET US TRY AND REPAIR IT FIRST REPAIRS TO ALL DIGIBOXES - SKY, SKY+ AND SKY HD. ALSO HARD DRIVE UPGRADES. DOUBLE YOUR SKY+ MEMORY

LOCAL 10, DOÑA LOLA, OPP. EL ZOCO (CALAHONDA) TEL: 952 93 91 98 MOB: 607 383 578 EMAIL: REECEELECTRONICS@YA.COM

GREAT VALUE ADVERTISING

FOR SALE

VW BEETLE 2.0L 1999, LEFT HAND DRIVE, ENGLISH PLATES, AIR CON, REMOTE CENTRAL LOCKING, E/W, PAS, 6 DISC CD PLAYER, VERY GOOD CONDITION

€4,995 Tel: 663 061 669

1/8 page advert only €20 A MONTH for a limited period

RETAINING WALL SOLUTIONS Are you wasting valuable land? Garden on a slope, no room for a pool?

A modular block system and EC7 approved An engineered solution means a safe retaining wall No more waiting - fast installation and a planned programme Looks l ike natural stone – custom colouring Affordable and maintenance free No hidden costs Guaranteed work, qual ified installers

Tel/Fax: 0034 952 666 547 www.retainingwallsolutions.eu

What ’s New Agua Trend - With the summer months and warmer weather well on the way, we all need to be thinking about drinking more water and keeping ourselves, employees and our children properly hydrated. Agua Trend offer spring water dispensers for the home or office, which dispense either hot, cold or room temperature water and can be rented for as little as €6 a month with no minimum contract. What’s more the 19L bottles of spring water only cost €6 and are delivered for free with no minimum order. Call: 951 247 273 or see their advert page 29. Snack Attack - Due to popular demand Snack Attack in Jardín Botánico, La Cala de Mijas are now

opening on Sundays from 10am - 4pm offering breakfast, lunch and their extremely popular roast dinner which is just €10 for two courses. They also offer a fantastic value full English breakfast for only €3.95. You can find them at Local 26 Jardín Botánico or see their advert page 39 for more details. Kool Kids - in Jardín Botánico offering kids designer and character clothing and toys are now also working in conjunction with Red photography and are able to offer professional photo shoots and sittings in the dedicated studio inside at the rear of the shop. For further info call: 952 493 086 or see their advert page 69.

F o ru m HAIR & BEAUTY SPA

Specialists in timber decking, pergola’s and gazebo’s.

SPRING SPA SPECIALS 5 STAR FACIAL - 80€ Aromatics Facial, Back and Shoulder Massage, Brow Shape, Lash Tint and a Shampoo and Blowdry to finish.

TOP TO TOE - 55€ Spa Pedicure, Full Manicure and a Shampoo and Blowdry.

GOLDEN TAN. - 40€ Increase your living space and improve your lifestyle. For more information or a free quotation please contact:

Tel: 952 887 700 Mob: 679 975 683

Email: info@ecodeckspain.com

www.ecodeckspain.com

Face and all over Body Spray Tan, all over Exfoliation and a Shampoo and Blowdry.

FULL HEAD FOIL HIGHLIGHTS, Shampoo and Blowdry and a Tidy and Paint. (Hands or Feet) Only 80 euros. Introduce a friend and you will both receive 10€ off your next visit. Offers valid until end of May 2009.

952 59 90 98

www.forumhairandbeauty.com Edificio Calasol, Local B 13. La Cala de Mijas, Mijas Costa

GARDE CE TER L I D A V I S TA

Ctra de Cadiz, Km171,29670, San Pedro de Alcantara, Behind McDonalds in San Pedro. Tel; 952786020

HUGE RANGE OF: POTS GARDEN TOOLS PLANTS FLOWERS & SHRUBS GARDEN FURNITURE BAR-B-QUES GARDEN ORNAMENTS

www.gameroommarbella.com. Tel: 952 806 178 Calle Juan de Mena 18. Pol. Ind. Estepona

GAME ROOM MARBELLA

VIP Marbella card holders, receive from between 5% and 50% discount from our list of over 1000 retailers in the Marbella and surrounding areas. You the card holder will receive 100% of the discounts offered by the retailers without us receiving any comission. All of the advantages, discounts and benefits are given directly to the card holder at the point of sale. There are no points to collect, no bonus systems and no free flights just intstant cash savings.

The first choice for baby swim ming classes on the Co sta del Sol.

swim bebé swim

The original and longest-established provider of baby swimming and children's swimming lessons on the Costa del Sol for little ones from 3 months up to 4 years old.

20 month old baby swims confidently under water

Babies learning survival techniques 2.5 year old very confident with underwater swims

Baby games and activities

Did you know that babies can ‘swim’ independently in water before they can sit, crawl or walk? Babies are born with natural reflexes which can be developed to enable them to swim at a very early stage. swim bebé swim use natural methods of teaching your child to swim, without armbands, with the parent/helper present in the water and with immediate results.

For more information call: +34 609 474 038 www.swimbebeswim.com nathalie@swimbebeswim.com A ‘swim bebe swim’ franchise owned and operated under License by Nathalie Martinez.

T he Jokes page

page

When a woman found out that she was pregnant, she lit up the phone lines telling everyone the good news. One day later that week, she took her four year old son, Sam, out shopping. A woman asked the boy if he was excited about the baby. “Yes,” he said. “I know what we're going to name it. If it is a girl, we're calling her Molly and if it is a boy, we’re going to call it Quits.” Two good old boys in a Tennessee trailer park were sittin' around talking one afternoon over a cold beer After a while the first guy says to the second, “If I was to sneak over to your trailer on Saturday and put it to See what happens when you your wife sleep around! while you was off hunting and she got pregnant and had a baby, would that make us kin?” The second guy crooked his head sideways for a minute, scratched his head and squinted his eyes thinking real hard about the question. Finally, he says. “Well...I don't know about kin, but it sure w o u l d make us

even.”

A teacher is explaining biology to her fourth grade students. “Human beings are the only animals that stutter,” she says. A little girl raises her hand. “I had a kitty-cat who stuttered.” The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident. “Well,” she began, “I was in the back garden with my kitty and the Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!” “That must've been scary,” said the teacher. “It sure was,” said the little girl. “My kitty raised her back, went Sssss, Sssss, Sssss and before she could say ‘Sh*t’, the Rottweiler ate her!!!” The teacher had to leave the room. A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him twenty streets from his home and leaving him at the park. As he arrived home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day he decided to drive the cat forty streets away. He put the beast out and headed home. Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat! He kept taking the cat further and further and the cat would always beat him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there. Hours later the man calls home to his wife: “Jen, is the cat there?” “Yes,” the wife answers, “why do you ask?” Frustrated, the man answered, “Put that son of a b*tch on the phone, I'm lost and need directions!”

to advertise please call 663 061 669

INSTANT CASH SELL YOUR FURNITURE PACKAGE OR INDIVIDUAL ITEMS CALL LUCKY: 663 95 83 78

ATTENTION Photography for costa link magazine

WILL NO LONGER ACCEPT ADVERTISING FROM THE FOLLOWING BUSINESSES OR INDIVIDUALS: GUY MASSEY TIM LE CHEF ANH PLUMBING NATASHAS ARLENE FOR HAIR MONSOON INTERIORS

all Occasions

Weddings Birthday Parties Portraits Commercial All events covered.

Photography by Jenniferjane tel: 0034 661 194 653 byjenniferjane@gmail.com www.byjenniferjane.com

get your kids business seen by the ones that matter. call: 663 061 669

FRIDAY

What is out on the lawn all summer and is Irish?

KIDS STUFF

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952 450 487

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1 2 3 4 5

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S TA R S I GN S

A look at what's in store for you this month... The month begins with you worrying about what the future holds. Whether it's money, work, time or romance, you just feel like there's not enough to go around. Consider Capricorn the situation: Is it really as dire as you perceive it to be? It isn't, so go ahead and loosen up.

Aquarius

Pisces

Aries

Taurus

Gemini

You’ll feel strongly this month to act on impulse. Should you go with it? Well, only you can be the judge of that, but before you do anthing rash like telling your boss to ‘get lost’, think about the consequences and decide whether some of these impluses should be surpressed. Just because you look at a situation involving a friend and see exactly how things are going to play out doesn't mean that your friend is interested in hearing your analysis. Sometimes, you just have to sit back and let your friends figure things out on their own. There's just no stopping you this month. No way, no how. You're a lean, mean getting-things-done machine. You're charming, disarming and energetic. You have big plans and whatever you take on this month, you'll take it all the way to the finish line. Don't be taken in by false promises and unfounded claims on the 10th and 11th. Somebody wants to take you to the cleaners, and you can't let them do that. However you deal with the situation it is imperative that you remain calm. Make peace and you’ll be quids up. You're ready to finally take that great idea and put it into action this month. It might mean you finally ask for a raise or pluck up the courage to ask someone special out. Whatever it is, your whole month will benefit from your get up and go attitude.

Cancer

Leo

Virgo

Libra

Scorpio

There's nothing wrong with showing off a little once in awhile, and this month is an excellent time to strut your stuff. You’ve been putting in a lot of work and you’re pretty proud of your acheivments. The folks who love you will love seeing you thrive. If you haven't figured out just where to channel all your extraordinary energies, this month you'll identify just the right creative outlet. Use some downtime the 2nd, 3rd and 4th to reassess your strategies - particularly regarding financial planning. You’re really want to be a good little helper at the beginning of the month. Keep up the good work all month long and you'll be thrilled at all the great things you accomplish for the people around you. Some particularly rewarding results will come your way as a result of this. There's a lot of activity, both at work and after-hours, that could lead to some serious (and very positive) upheavals in your life. You want to be ready for them! Throw caution to the wind and plunge into a new friendship or romance on the 21st. Your daydreams are a great source of inspiration for you on the 18th. Plumb them for ideas about where to go next in your life. If you want to be in a relationship, you have to learn to compromise, and you can't compromise if you can't communicate. So practice both and pronto!

While chances are good that you will be circumnavigating something new, you'll have to push to make it happen. Go ahead and push- the effort will more than pay off! An Sagittarius open mind will stand you in good stead this month and allow you to see new, unexpected opportunities.

Strange but true... Only 30% of us can flare our nostrils. 21% of us don’t make our bed daily. 5% of us never do.

13% of us admit to occasionally doing our offspring’s homework. 91% of us lie regularly.

Men do 29% of laundry each week. Only 7% of women trust their husbands to do it correctly.

27% admit to cheating on a test or quiz.

40% of women have hurled footwear at a man.

50% admit they regularly sneak food into movie theaters to avoid the high prices of snack foods.

85% of men don’t use the slit in their underwear. 67.5% of men wear briefs. The average bra size today is 36C whereas 10 years ago it was a 34B. 85% of women wear the wrong bra size. 3 out of 4 of us store our euro notes in rigid order with singles leading up to higher denominations.

29% admit they’ve intentionally stolen something from a shop.

82% believe in an afterlife. 45% believe in ghosts. 13% (mostly men) have spent a night in jail. 29% of us are virgins when we marry. 58.4% have called into work sick when we weren’t.

METACONA Manufacturers of ornate iron work Aluminium doors and windows Mosquito screens Shower screens Electric shutters suppliers of scissor gates Stainless steEl welding and fabrications Toldos manual or electric Nave 8, Fase 3, Poligono La Vega, Camino Coin, Mijas Costa

Tel: 617 760 155 Email: metacona@hotmail.com to advertise please call 663 061 669

Sponsored by Videonet, La Cala On DVD - all available at Videonet, La Cala THE READER - begins in Germany shortly after the end of WW2 when teenager Michael Berg becomes ill and is helped home by Hanna, a stranger twice his age. Michael recovers from scarlet fever and seeks out Hanna to thank her. The two are quickly drawn into a passionate but secretive affair. Despite their intense bond, Hanna mysteriously disappears. Eight years later, while Michael is a law student observing the Nazi war crime trials, he is stunned to find Hanna back in his life - this time as a defendant in the courtroom. As Hanna's past is revealed, Michael uncovers a deep secret that will impact both of their lives. BRIDE WARS - Liv and Emma are best friends who since childhood have planned every detail of their respective weddings. Now,

at age 26, they're both about to get married and live happily ever after. Or maybe not... When a clerical error causes a clash in wedding dates it turns out they're now to be married on the same day! Now, the two best friends who'd do anything for each other, find themselves in a no-holds-barred struggle that threatens to erupt into all-out war. SEVEN POUNDS - From the Director of The Pursuit Of Happyness comes Seven Pounds. Will Smith stars as Ben, an IRS agent who is depressed and guilt-ridden about mistakes from his past. He sets out to make amends by helping seven strangers. When he meets Emily (Rosario Dawson), a beautiful woman with a heart condition, he falls in love with her, thereby complicating his plans.

ocal Info Emergency Numbers Central number for Fire, Police & Ambulance National Police Local Police Guardia Civil dica

112 091 092 062

Medical

Emergency 061 Ambulance Marbella 902 505 061 Ambulance Coin 952 453 267

Marbella 952 769 946 Coin 952 452 767 San Pedro 952 787 700

Town Halls Marbella 952 761 100 San Pedro 952 453 020 La Cala de Mijas 952 493 208 Fuengirola 952 589 300 Estepona 952 801 100

Fire Brigade Emergency number 080 Marbella 952 774 349 Estepona 952 804 483 Fuengirola 952 461 046

Markets

Consulates 952 952 952 952 952 952 952

352 475 226 604 212 226 474

300 108 373 383 442 590 891

Tourist Information Marbella Coin Estepona Fuengirola San Pedro

Bus Stations Marbella 952 764 400 Coin 952 450 366 San Pedro 952 781 396 Estepona 952 800249 For a list of complete times www.andalucia.com/travel/bus Train Timetables 902 240 202 Airports Malaga 952 048 844 Gibraltar 956 773 026

Health Centres

British Ireland Denmark Sweden Germany France U.S.A

Transport

952 771 442 952 822 818 952 822 818 952 467 457 952 785 252

Monday - Marbella (fairground site on east side) Tuesday - Fuengirola (fairground near Los Boliches) Wednesday - Estepona (Avda. Juan Carlos) La Cala - Feria ground Thursday - San Pedro (Recinto Ferial) Alhaurin el Grande - (La Fama) Friday - Alhaurin el Grande (Bar Aquamania) Saturday - Coin (Calle Urbano Pineda) La Cala - Feria ground. Sunday - Puerto Estepona

(Marina)

Cinemas

All the Cinemas listed below show films in English as well as Spanish. Call first to check what is showing that week. Marbella: Cinesur Plaza del Mar 952 766 941 La Ca単ada 902 333 231 Puerto Banus: Gran Marbella 952 810 077 Coin: La Trocha 951 315 039 Fuengirola Cinesur Miramar 902 221 622

Chemists 24 hour chemist Urb. Artola, Ctra. Cadiz Km 194. Marbella. Tel: 952 83 25 89

Taxis Marbella Taxis 952 774 488 Mijas Costa Taxis 952 476 593

Diary Dates 1st May - Labour Day - Public holiday. 2nd May - Spanish Mothers Day. 3rd May - Malage Crosses of May celebrations. 25th May - Corpus Christi processions throughout Andalucia. Benalmadena Pueblo in the morning is covered in flower petals followed by a procession.

if you would like to sponsor this page please call 663 061 669

ThelReviews c osta ink directory Advertise Your business here for just €65 for 12 issues -that’s just over 5 a month!!! or have it framed for only €99!

Accountant Malcolm Greenwood. Company formations from €750, business valuations, business start up, sole proprietors (autonomo), bookeeping from €55 per month. Tel: 952 59 69 27

Beauty Permanent Perfect Make Up Permanent make-up. Eyeliner, eyebrows and lips. Free consultation. Fully insured worldwide. Member of SPCP. Call: 666 094 075

Building Supplies Aim Building Supplies Las Chapas Poligono, Elviria, Marbella. Tel: 952 835 172

Car Traders Alhaurin Autos Cars bought and sold. LHD and RHD. Alhaurin el Grande. Tel: 661 964 014

Cleaning ‘We Care to Clean and We Clean to Care’ for your domestic property. Daily/Weekly cleans, Spring cleans, ‘One offs’, Moving house cleans and End of tenancy cleans. Contact Karen: 677 553 647 karencox@live.co.uk

Computer Repairs & Sales Mintmicro S.L. Computer Shop Alhaurin el Grande, for Inks, Sales - Repairs & Upgrades.Virus & Spyware Removal Open 10 - 6 Mon - Friday No Siesta. Saturday 10 - 2 Tel: 952 596 346 or Skype: mintmicro.support Email: info@mintmicro.es

Drain services Euro Drain Services CCTV surveys, Drain jetting, Septic tanks, Soakaway Installations. Fast and Effective 24hr blocked drain clearance. Call Darren 629 640 754 All areas.

Electrician 16th Edition BS7671 qualified, Apprentice trained, 21 years experience. Rewires, extra sockets, lights, fault finding etc. Pay as you go electric meters supplied and fitted, ideal for holiday lets, aircon etc. Ian: 650 151 569

Estate & Rental Agents www.spanserv.com Property for sale or rent. Horses for sale, Discussion forum. Tel: 616 218 617 or 619 638 498

Fish and Chip Shop The Boat House El Zoco Calahonda. Mijas Costa’s premier Fish & Chip Restaurant and takeaway. The best Fish & Chips on the Coast. Tel: 952930148 Open 7 nights a week

Fitness The Fitness Studio Calahonda offering, Aerobic 4 mums n Babies, Spin, Body Tone, Aerobox, Pilates, Yoga, K Boxing, dance & more! 637118 848 fitnessstudio@terra.es

Gardener 8 years in Spain, hedges and palms pruned & planted, turfing & fencing, tall trees a speciality. Properties tidied, monthly maintenance from 30€. Call Steve: 616 669 285

Glass Curtains RDMC Glass manufacturers and glass curtain and stainless steel specialists. Nave 16, Camino de Coin. Tel: 952 477 963

Elite Glass Curtains. Poligono Elviria 26 Elviria, 29600. Tel: 952 830 503

Hairdressers Hair Magic Calypso. Tel: 952 931 777

please mention the costa link magazine when responding to adverts

c osta l ink directory Internet

Painters

Y-Internet.com Y-Internet.com Broadband internet & teleBroadband internet &

phone service provider for telephone service provider residents, communities & for residents, communities holidaymakers. & holidaymakers. Tel: 952932266 or visit our Tel: 952932266 or visit our website www.y-internet.com website: www.y-internet.com for more information for more information

Lawyers VELASCO Y BALBÁS ABOGADOS Conveyancing Rentals Debt Collection Inheritance and Wills Insurances Litigation. Tel: 952 808 477 Fax: 952 808 724 Avd. España 220, 3ºC, 29680, Estepona.

info@vbabogados.com

Professional painting. Interior and exterior and decorative painting. www.artdecoxxiplus.com Tel: 667 235 741 after 3p.m.

Photography Jennifer Jane Photography for all occasions. Weddings, Birthdays, Portraits, and Commercial. All events covered. Tel: 661 194 653 www.byjenniferjane.com

Printing & Signage Eyeprint Business cards, flyers, signage, display stands. Tel: 951 310 395

Removals Companies The Depot

Locksmiths Costa Locks 24 hour emergency locksmith. Patio doors secured, safes opened and fitted. Tel: 952 660 233 or 667 668 685

Locksmith 24Hour Tel: 666 089 427 www.knockoutlocks.com

Marble Floor Polishing NON-SLIP, LASTING SHINE, NO MESS OR DUST. SPECTACULAR RESTORATIONS. FULL GRINDING SERVICE TEL: 608 455 104 BLITZ OF ELVIRIA

International and local removal specialists. Pol. Ind San Pedro, Marbella. Tel: 952 450 487

Satellite TV Kings Klub Sky Installations, all viewing cards, digiboxes, Sky and Sky HD, dishes and re-alignments, community systems, parts and labour guaranteed for 1 year. Tel: 951 273 538 www.kingsklub.com

GB TV Sky installation within 24 hours. Sky cards, re-alignments and activations Tel: 658 084 802 or 658 084 806.

Security Fortress Security All steelwork. Grills, gates, fences, balconies, garage doors. Tel: 952 931 128

Dragon Security Systems Concept smoke screen system, CCTV, Intruder alarm systems and more. Tel: 670 954 409

Tile Warehouse Hard Rock Tile showroom and warehouse. Kitchens and appliances, bathrooms, marble, granite and paint. Tel: 951 275 257

Windows & Doors Windows Direct PVC, Aluminium windows, doors, conservatories and glass curtains. Edf. Los Pinos, Elviria. Tel: 951 704 594 or 666 094 072. www.windows-direct.eu

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