Out in STL - Volume 1, Issue 2

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SEX, LIES & INSTAGRAM: THE NEW GUY IN TOWN TELLS ALL

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A GAY OLD POOL PARTY

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HOMETOWN GIRL LEA DELARIA HAS A DATE WITH JAZZ ST. LOUIS

A magazine exploring — and celebrating — the LGBTQ community in St. Louis Publisher Chris Keating Editor in Chief Chris Andoe E D I T O R I A L Managing Editor Nicholas Phillips Associate Editor Melissa Meinzer Copy Editor Evie Hemphill Contributing Writers Eric Berger, Seán Collins, Patrick Collins, Charles Reagan, Melinda Cooper, Dera Luce, Melissa Meinzer, Monica Mileur, Ben Westhoff Editor at Large Sarah Fenske

A R T Art Director Kelly Glueck Contributing Photographers Susan Bennet, Monica Mileur, Matt Seidel, Mabel Suen, Sara Bannoura, Gerry Love P R O D U C T I O N Production Manager Brittani Schlager

M U LT I M E D I A A D V E R T I S I N G Sales Director Colin Bell Senior Account Executive Cathleen Criswell, Erica Kenney, Nicole Starzyk Account Managers Emily Fear, Jennifer Samuel C I R C U L A T I O N Circulation Manager Kevin G. Powers E U C L I D M E D I A G RO U P Chief Executive Officer Andrew Zelman Chief Operating Officers Chris Keating, Michael Wagner Human Resources Director Lisa Beilstein VP of Digital Services Stacy Volhein Creative Director Tom Carlson www.euclidmediagroup.com N A T I O N A L A D V E R T I S I N G VMG Advertising 1-888-278-9866, www.voicemediagroup.com Out In STL is published quarterly

by Euclid Media Group Verified Audit Member Out In STL 308 N. 21st Street, Suite 300, St. Louis, MO 63103 www.outinstl.com General information: 314-754-5966 Fax administrative: 314-754-5955 Fax editorial: 314-754-6416 Founded in 2017

Out in STL is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. Additional copies of the current issue may be purchased for $1.00 plus postage, payable in advance at the Out in STL office. Out in STL may be distributed only by Out in STL authorized distributors. No person may, without prior written permission of Out in STL, take more than one copy of each Out in STL weekly issue.

The entire contents of Out in STL are copyright 2017 by Out in STL, LLC. No portion may be reproduced in whole or in part by any means, including electronic retrieval systems, without the expressed written permission of the Publisher, Out in STL, 308 N. 21st Street, Suite 300, St. Louis, MO 63103. Please call the Out in STL office for back-issue information, 314-754-5966.

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| OUT IN ST. LOUIS | Volume 1 - Issue 2

letter from the editor :

CHRIS ANDOE T

wenty years ago, I was living in Oklahoma City and decided to spread my wings and move to a larger metropolitan area. I wanted to be within a comfortable day’s drive of my family in Tulsa, and I had a few options, none of them ideal.

There was no adventure in moving to Dallas. It was full of insufferable Oklahomans who acted like their 200-mile move was akin to conquering Paris. Kansas City seemed pleasant, but was also too similar to my hometown. And Denver, the capital of the state that had recently passed the homophobic Amendment 2, didn’t sound like a welcoming place.

But there was a mysterious dark horse 500 miles to the northeast, the last eastern metropolis: St. Louis. And nobody had anything good to say about it.

“Oh, it’s awful,” began a friend who had traveled to the city on business. “The best way I can describe it is it’s like Gotham City. It’s really old and crumbling, with soot-stained buildings, crowded rowhouses, smokestacks…”

Everything I heard only piqued my interest. This was the adventure I was looking for — and without knowing a soul in this city, I made it my home. I’ve since wandered around, living from San Francisco to New York, but this place has remained my muse, inspiring my book and pulling me back time and again.

Some cities have no memories. Some are just nice, sedate places without roots, while others have transient populations and ephemeral cultures. In such cities, clean slates are easy to come by. St. Louis is not among them. Ours is an opera of larger-than-life characters with long histories of collaboration and conflict. Ours is a haunted city that writhes, a passionate city that burns. Ours is a saga to keep a writer like myself busy for a lifetime.

Now, two decades on — after first being discovered by venerable journalist Colin Murphy, then ten years working under the direction of Darin Slyman (the Miranda Priestly of St. Louis) — I’m deeply honored to be chosen to take the helm of this audacious magazine.

The industry consensus is that LGBTQ media is dead. Out in STL, however, is making a bold bet: that if we deliver a high-quality product that reflects and connects us, LGBTQ media can thrive.

I’m betting my reputation on it.

Chris Andoe, Editor in Chief

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20.

TABLE OF

CONTENTS QS.............................................8 ANDOE.....................................10 VANITIES................................16 LONGFORM...........................20 AGENDA..................................32 FLAVORS................................36 PERFORMERS.......................40 WELLNESS.............................44 NIGHTOWLS...........................46

Cover photo taken by

KHAREN HILL

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| OUT IN ST. LOUIS | Volume 1 - Issue 2

Volume 1 - Issue 2 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

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ALL PHOTOS COURTESY OF LEA DELARIA

Qs OUT IN STL

Lea DeLaria I

f all you know about Lea DeLaria is her gimlet-eyed prison persona Big Boo on Netflix’s Orange Is the New Black, well, truthfully, you’re off to an OK start. Boo brings butch sexiness into the mainstream in a way we haven’t much seen before, which is quite cool.

But there’s so much more to know!

DeLaria grew up just across the river in Belleville, Illinois. A multifaceted artist who has been collecting Theatre World and Screen Actors Guild awards since the 1990s, she’s also won plaudits as a jazz singer. Her 2015 record House of David consists of jazzy updates to David Bowie’s catalog.

This Christmas, after you open all your goodies, you can unwrap one more gift from DeLaria: On December 27 and 28, she’s doing two sets each night at Jazz St. Louis. Her show promises bits of comedy interwoven with songs from her latest album.

Out in STL caught up with DeLaria to talk about lesbian dreams, Bowie, Sicilian rage, Trump, weird jazz and how much things have changed in our little corner of the world.

THE Hometown heroine dishes on jazz and local LGBTQ history BY Melissa Meinzer Out in STL: What was it like for you growing up queer in Belleville?

Lea DeLaria: I went to grade school, K through eighth, at St. Mary’s. I was originally supposed to go to Notre Dame for high school and live in the dorms. I was going to live in the dorms at an all-girls Catholic high school! That’s like a lesbian dream! The month I was supposed to start, the school got condemned and closed. I think God was saying “no.” I went to Belleville West.

I had the luck of having a couple of very smart parents who encouraged me to be who I am. Not everybody has that. My parents, even though they were Catholic, both of them, which is not generally very good for us queers, they were able to see past it, and were able to listen to me and grow. I listened to them.

Continued on 8 Volume 1 - Issue 2 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

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Lea DeLaria: DeLaria + Bowie = Jazz.

Music and comedy featuring special guest Janis Siegel. Presented by Jazz St. Louis and the Cabaret Project of St. Louis. $40.

Buy tickets online at jazzstl.org or call 314.571.6000, or at the box office at 3536 Washington Avenue.

8

LEA DELARIA Continued from pg 7 The Red Bull, I think, was the dyke bar in East St. Louis, around the corner from Faces. That was my first gay bar.

I was underage; I had a fake ID. I walked in there and I was like, “Wow, I think I know who I am!” I actually fit in there.

I went to my first gay pride parade and it was in St. Louis. It was the first one. The person I was with wore a fuckin’ mask; that’s the way it was. I was arrested in Missouri for open and notorious homosexuality. I spent the night in jail.

And now there’s a gay bar in Belleville. I speak at universities and high schools now. They have me speak! At high schools! Come on! They have clubs!!

OISTL: What led you to do an album of David Bowie covers? Was it weird for you that he died just months after your record came out?

LD: When you’re a little queer in Belleville in the 1970s and David Bowie

| OUT IN ST. LOUIS | Volume 1 - Issue 2

Qs OUT IN STL

comes out in a skirt singing rock and roll, you gotta go “What the fuck?” He was very instrumental for all of us little queers in those days. He was the boss.

He was very significantly helpful with this record. My label, Warner Jazz, doesn’t exist anymore. I started this process with the label and the label went under, and I had to do a crowdfunding thing. David Bowie was incredibly supportive. I honestly felt like I killed him. It was so strange.

I cried [when he died]. I have to say I cried. I don’t think I have to keep him alive. We all keep him alive, we all do in our hearts.

OISTL: You’ve been a vocal critic of the White House’s current occupant. How do you keep your head up?

LD: We’re dealing with an administration that is basically a hate crime. A lot of people are feeling distraught by it, but I like to keep my eyes on what’s actually going on. We have to look at our progress. Sometimes it’s very ugly progress.

I’m getting fucking rageful! All you

have to do is read the asshole’s tweets every day. I stay rageful because I’ve always been rageful. Some people are just a little too middle class and a little too, oh, polite. They don’t get it. I am way too Sicilian. I am fucking Sicilian and I know that rage gets things done.

OISTL: How did you get into jazz? What should we expect from the show?

LD: My pops was a musician. That’s how. When he saw that I was into it, he taught me. I would sing with him.

This is my first time playing Jazz at the Bistro. I have a very special guest, Janis Siegel from the Manhattan Transfer. She has nineteen Grammy nominations and nine Grammys.

I’m coming out with an all-chick band because I think it’s really important in the face of the sexism we are dealing with right now. If I’m going to get work, I’m going to give it to my sisters. All women. It’s going to be a girlsrule concert.

OISTL: Is it frustrating to be so accomplished in jazz and have most people chiefly know you from TV?

LD: I’ve always done a lot of things.

That’s my career, that’s the way it is. I write, I act, I direct, I sing, I write music. Everything that I do I’ve found success in. It’s probably harder on my manager than it is on me. He’s the one that’s gotta navigate that shit! I don’t think of it as frustrating. Some people know me for only one thing. Some people only know me as a comedian, some people know me only as an actor, some people know me only as a Broadway star, some people only know me as jazz singer.

Since Orange, I get a whole lot of crossover now. I’ve done Conan a whole lot. I’ve sung every time I’ve been on Conan.

Jazz is really dying out. Part of the reason is they do the same 50 fuckin’ songs over and over. The American Songbook is great, but it’s not the only songbook out there. Kids don’t wanna hear that. If you look at the oeuvre of albums I’ve put out, you’re only going to see one American Songbook. I do weird jazz because I’m trying to entice younger audiences.

OISTL: Anything else we need to know? n LD: Come see me, bitches!

Volume 1 - Issue 2 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS | 9

Sex, Secrets & Shame

Spurned romantic prospects dug into his past. Now Salam Alhamdy tells all

S

alam Alhamdy hadn’t been in the office more than an hour when he became fixated with setting up a sexual encounter. On that May morning in 2016, the 33-year-old was still living in Kansas City. Business travelers were always on his radar, and one was ready and waiting at an airport hotel. He fired off a few directives to work colleagues, replied to a text from his partner of two years and then discreetly ducked out for one of his trademark four-hour lunch breaks.

By all appearances, Alhamdy, a fit and attractive young professional, had a life that was perfectly in balance: a harmonious relationship, a fashionable Midtown loft and a lucrative position in finance. He was the cook of the household, and over candlelight dinners, Alhamdy and his partner would discuss art, decor, music, politics and their future together.

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On the inside, however, his compulsion was consuming him.

“I mean, I’m a project manager. Time management and milestones are my thing. But still, my erratic behavior was reaching a point where there were close calls, mostly with the boyfriend. I would show up to events late, ‘long nights in the office,’” Alhamdy explains.

Instead, there was sex. What began with one-on-one action evolved into full-on orgies in hotel rooms, with the behavior getting riskier as time went on.

Sometimes he even entertained extreme fetishes like blood play.

“It would start with an app. The biggest party happened when I texted a guy in town from Chicago. He invited a couple of his friends, and his friends’ friends. I think within two hours we had about twenty or so guys come in and out. Some jerked off and left, some came to watch. Others to get fucked. It didn’t matter what anyone wanted or

BY Chris Andoe

why they were there; everyone was welcome.”

I first took note of Alhamdy about a year later, shortly after he’d moved to St. Louis. Seen as a mysterious, even exotic, newcomer, he ignited imaginations and generated social media buzz with his professed mission of bringing back the lost art of dating, all while looking for his ideal companion. It was reminiscent of The Bachelor, and many contestants were jockeying for position, seeing who would be the next to be wined and dined.

The St. Louis honeymoon was shortlived, with a deepening pool of spurned romantic interests telling their friends not to waste their time because Alhamdy was a player — giving every indication of budding romance, only to cut it off after a couple of dinners. Alhamdy has a fascinating ability to make anyone in his gaze feel like the hottest, most interesting man. And he offers those in his

.

PHOTO COURTESY OF SALAM ALHAMDY

Andoe OUT IN STL

Alhamdy was seen as a mysterious, even exotic newcomer. But soon locals were speculating on what he was hiding. company the kind of undivided attention that’s unheard of in today’s distracted culture. If attention is a drug, many locals were now in withdrawal.

Soon flirtations were on the decline and cold shoulders on the rise. Then rumors of a torrid past in Kansas City hit the local bloodstream. Over cocktails,

St. Louisans speculated on what exactly Alhamdy was hiding.

Aware of the whisper campaign, Alhamdy decided that if stories were going to be told, he wanted to be the one to tell them. He also felt the process would be one of personal growth. We met for dinner at the Boat House in Forest Park to discuss what he now says was an all-consuming sexual addiction.

Alhamdy describes being in a trancelike state when in the eye of the storm, which was followed by an adrenaline rush.

“When you have that much sex, you not only lose track of time but you lose track of reality,” he says. “You really do.

Somehow the pleasure only became more intense. And I became more aggressive and volatile. Slowly I let go of whatever inhibitions. I didn’t care what someone wanted me to do to them.”

After exiting the hotel, he says, he often felt “elated.”

“I didn’t feel guilt,” he recalls. “I felt joy. I felt connected. I knew it was a temporary high, because at the end I knew I am doing something terrible to someone, and to myself. But for a good few hours that didn’t matter. The way I felt towards the end of relationship made nothing matter but my pleasure.”

The hangover, however, was atrocious.

“By the next day guilt sets in and it’s heavy. Really heavy. You feel like you’re this criminal, this low grade of human filth. I thought of suicide many times.

Can’t tell you how many times I wished I had driven into oncoming traffic or how many times I seriously thought of shooting myself in the head. That’s how bad it was.”

Known for his artistic selfies, during the height of his addiction Alhamdy would avoid looking into the camera — or he’d obscure his face altogether.

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OUT IN STL Andoe SALAM ALHAMDY Continued from pg 11 “My boyfriend never knew anything was wrong. He just knew I took pretty dark pictures in which I didn’t make direct contact with the camera and hid my eyes. He would ask me, ‘How come you cover your eyes a lot?’ I would tell him because it makes it feel like a candid cinematic shot. The truth is, I could barely look at myself.”

On a flight back from Seattle, Alhamdy was looking through erotic text messages when his boyfriend, seated one row back, leaned forward and saw the contents. While nothing was said on the flight, emotions exploded at home with demands for answers and Salam’s partial admissions.

“I knew there was no fixing this. He was shaking, yelling and crying, and I wanted to comfort him, but I couldn’t.”

The two briefly tried to live as roommates as they worked to untangle the

living situation. That created situations ripe for jealousy and resentment, especially since Alhamdy hit the ground running, wasting no time pursuing a new romance. It all came to a head when he returned home to find his partner had filed for an order for protection claiming harassment, a charge Alhamdy adamantly denies.

“I walked into my apartment to find six cops with my partner, who was looking dead-faced. They told me I had ten minutes to get my things and go. I checked into a hotel and sat on the phone with my best friend all night, just thinking about how badly I’d fucked up my life.”

Alhamdy says he didn’t challenge the order of protection, which was granted in July 2016.

Retreating to the distant suburbs as salacious tales of his double life, many of which he says were false, spread through Kansas City, Alhamdy entered

“ ‘How come you cover your eyes a lot?’ The truth is, I could barely look at myself.” a twelve-step sex addiction program.

“I’m not a religious man,” says Alhamdy, “and wasn’t expecting all the references to God in the program, but it did help me see and admit that I was out of control, which was an incredibly hard thing for me to do.”

After the program, Alhamdy decided to make a fresh start in St. Louis. He says he has shed the duplicity that was the hallmark of his past and lives a life

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that’s an open book (check out his Facebook page to see for yourself). He aims to be honest with others and honest with himself. Rather than finding sex, his focus now is finding his one true love.

One could argue that Alhamdy has gone from being sexually promiscuous to romantically promiscuous. But while anonymous sexual partners are normally easy to shake, spurned romantic interests often get messy — as Alhamdy knows all too well. Few things disinfect better than sunlight, and by owning his story I think he has given us all an example of how to effectively neutralize our often complicated pasts.

While he is a single man who still enjoys sex, Alhamdy said in the past year he’s had less of it than any time in his adult life. But it’s not for the lack of offers.

“At the end of the night, it’s not St. Louis if they don’t want to fuck you.” n

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ne step into Rafael Adón and you find yourself in an intimate mashup of eras. On one hand, this boutique at 1901 Park Avenue in Lafayette Square is as artistically curated as the best of Instagram and Pinterest. On the other, the commerce that takes place here is decidedly old school, harking back to the days when consumers bought made-to-order clothing from tailors right around the corner.

“I want our bags to be timeless,” says owner, designer and maker Ralph Córdova.

Córdova, who also teaches educational ethnography at the University of Missouri–St. Louis, is a fourth-generation California Mexican. He opened this space in the fall of 2015. In deciding what to call it, he settled on using “Rafael,” the Latinized version of his first name, in combination with his middle name, “Adón.”

Thus he created a whole new persona for himself, one decidedly more artistic and design focused than one might expect of a tenured education professor.

“I want to recognize trends, but not become trendy,” he says. Accordingly, the silhouettes of the bags that emerge acknowledge the latest fashion, but the roots of the process that guides their creation run deep in history.

That process often begins as customers browse the display area and notice that the adjacent workshop has a sewing machine, leather stitcher and bags in various states of completion.

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PHOTOS BY MATT SEIDEL

O

BY Patrick Collins

Vanities OUT IN STL

Stitching

the Past

to the

Present

A Lafayette Square craftsman makes modern bags the old-fashioned way Volume 1 - Issue 2 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

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OUT IN STL Vanities RALPH CÓRDOVA Continued from pg 14

He was raised on a ranch near the small desert town of Blythe, California, where his paternal grandmother once worked as a seamstress making bespoke clothes. Córdova eventually moved to Santa Barbara, where he earned his Ph.D. in cultural perspectives in education. He also reconstituted and regrouped, as an out gay man, with his sister, mother and maternal grandmother — the latter a curandera, or woman who heals with plants. Together, they started a soap company, Verdura Botanica. Running a successful company gave him a taste for entrepreneurship; it also paid for graduate school.

By 2013, Córdova had settled in St. Louis. He found himself in the market for a book bag, and after looking at stores and on several websites, including Pinterest, he conceded that what he wanted did not yet exist. Refusing to settle for the next

PHOTOS BY MATT SEIDEL

“When people realize the making actually happens here, it opens up space for a conversation,” he says.

“Part of being in the bespoke or made-to-measure industry is educating the public that yes, you can contract someone to make something for you that’s really you, not something Burberry has decided to offer for fall.”

Córdova says his goal is to revive the old-fashioned practice of going to the tailor to have a skirt made based on pictures cut out of the Sears catalog. He is also tapping into the traditions of our cave-dwelling ancestors who assembled pieces of natural fiber to carry things.

Yet in the most intimate sense, Córdova is continuing a family tradition.

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7 7 2 6 F O R S Y T H • C L AY TO N • 3 1 4 . 2 9 6 . 8 0 9 6

W W W. TA N I S U S H I . C OM

PHOTOS BY MATT SEIDEL

best thing inspired his foray into leather bags.

“I couldn’t find exactly what I wanted, but I found different features that I liked, so I asked myself, ‘Why not just make it?’” he recalls. “I’d never worked with leather, but I knew how to sew.”

At the time, Córdova was using the sewing machine his husband gave him for Christmas shortly after they met, a machine they now call the “gateway drug” — because every machine he’s acquired since has become incrementally stronger. These days he uses a Consew model that — like the shop, and like Córdova himself — exudes an understated, sturdy sense of competence.

Continued on 19

be the truest you, whoever that may be

WE’RE PROUD TO LEND OUR HANDS 6 6 3 5 D E L M A R B L V D - S T. L O U I S , M O 6 3 1 3 0 - 3 1 4 . 8 6 3 . 8 2 8 8

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Volume 1 - Issue 2 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

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Vanities OUT IN STL RALPH CÓRDOVA Continued from pg 17 Córdova keeps that first bag (which he never completed) close at hand as a reminder of what he’s learned. And while the original bag is impressive, the prototype that occupies the center of the glass table where Córdova meets with clients is on another level entirely. Black with silver hardware, it’s at once sleek, elegant and durable; before the untrained eye it appears to be both sculpture and architecture. It has depth.

Most importantly, the prototype, while beautiful, is clearly a functional accessory. “I don’t like vanity for vanity’s sake,” he says. “I support individuals and companies whose products grew out of necessity rather than those that appeal strictly to lifestyle without any of the substance.”

That’s why he insists that clients remain closely involved in the design and creation of their bag. He prefers meeting in the studio, but engages online for those who live elsewhere. In addition to drawing on images that clients share of bags they like, Córdova conducts an indepth interview. What does the client carry? Is the bag just for work or will it be needed across different parts of the day?

“We talk about design and silhouette, then we go to textiles,” he says. “I get a sense of who a person is.”

Next, Córdova creates multi-dimensional hand renderings on his iPad. He shares them with the client, soliciting feedback. Once the design is finalized, he sends text messages to keep the client current on process, a stage he thoroughly enjoys.

“It’s important, not just so they can see their baby getting made but also if we reach a point where I’m realizing that I actually recommend something different in terms of components like hardware or thread,” he says. “It provides an in-themoment opportunity for them to the be author of the story of their bag. I like that process. I’m making something for them but they’re steering it.”

Once the bags are picked up, delivered or shipped, they rarely return for a visit, but Córdova loves it when they do. “That means we’re no longer just sharing an experience,” he says. “It means we’re in a relationn ship.”

Patrick Collins is a writer who recently returned to St. Louis after living for many years in Portland, Oregon. You can reach him at pword313@msn.com.

Rafael Adón 1901 Park Avenue

314-621-3784 www.rafaeladon.com Holiday hours, beginning the day after Thanksgiving and running through Christmas Eve: Thurs., 6 p.m. – 9 p.m.

Fri., 5 p.m. – 9 p.m.

Sat., noon – 9 p.m.

Sun., noon – 7 p.m.

Volume 1 - Issue 2 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

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A Gay Party Through an estate sale find, Geoff Story stumbled onto the hidden history of gay men in mid-century St. Louis

BY Nicholas Phillips

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PHOTOS COURTESY OF GEOFF STORY

Longform OUT IN STL

Left, Two men steal a poolside kiss at the Micotto farm in Jefferson County. Middle, The two canisters of 8 mm film that Geoff Story bought at the 1996 estate sale. Right, The mansion on Lindell Boulevard where the sale was held.

M

ost of the details of April 27, 1996, have melted away in Geoff Story’s mind, but he rightly remembers it being a Saturday. His Saturday ritual in those days was to scour the pages of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch for notices of estate sales. He loved estate sales. They allowed Story, then a 27-year-old advertising creative, to indulge in an unusual hobby: collecting the discarded family portraits and home movies of strangers.

Even as a child, such mementos had captivated him. He would stare at antique photos and ask adults who the subjects were, only to be told, “Nobody knows.”

“The concept of someone becoming anonymous and erased within a generation or two,” says Story, “that was so intriguing to me.”

On that April weekend, the newspaper ad that caught his eye began like this: Complete contents of CWE mansion [for sale] including art work, marble sculpture and pedestals, large period dining table, demi-lune tables, Paul McCobb dining set, sofas, beds, mirrors....

There was no mention of old films, but what stood out to Story was the address: 5615 Lindell Boulevard. The home sat just steps from the Missouri History Museum — smack in the middle of the twomile stretch of stately residences that line Forest Park’s northern edge. Estate sales there were always top-shelf.

“A lot of times, it was wealthy individuals who had really wonderful and tacky stuff,” he says. The ad further listed “much, much” miscellanea, “priced to sell.” Story was in the market for old-school cameras and 1950s neckties, too. He decided to go.

Inside the mansion, he climbed the staircase to the third floor. Wandering into a room that felt like an attic, he noticed a box with canisters of 8 mm film. He carried one canister over to the dormer window, unspooled the leader and held some title frames up to the light.

The title: “A Gay Party.” Story, who is gay, felt a flutter of curiosity. The film stock looked decades old. He wondered if it dated back to mid-century, when “gay” meant “jolly” but still served as code for “homosexual.” Hoping for the latter, he kept that reel, grabbed a second one, Continued on 23 Volume 1 - Issue 2 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

21

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| OUT IN ST. LOUIS | Volume 1 - Issue 2

PHOTOS COURTESY OF GEOFF STORY

Longform OUT IN STL

Sam Micotto and an unidentified friend.

A GAY PARTY Continued from pg 21 picked out some Kodachrome slides and descended the stairs. All three items totaled something like $3.

But when he finally watched the reels, which added up to 22 minutes, he realized he had stumbled on a treasure.

These home movies captured dozens of men splashing, lounging, dancing and laughing around a swimming pool somewhere in the countryside. It’s clear from their gestures and physical affections — and, in some cases, drag

attire — that they’re gay men.

What makes the film so poignant is its historical moment: Several clues suggest it was shot during and soon after World War II — an era in which the vast majority of homosexuals remained in the closet (which would explain why some are wearing wedding rings). The pool, it appears, was a place where dozens of them could just frolic and be themselves.

“In terms of length and time period,” says

Dr. Wil Brant, director of the Gerber/Hart Library and Archives in Chicago, WWII-era footage like this “would be extremely rare,” even in gay hubs such as San Francisco.

Michael Bronski, the Harvard University professor who authored the 2011 book, A Queer History of the United States, agrees. He has been allowed to watch the film and calls it “a remarkable find.”

The film sat on Geoff Story’s shelf for many years, but last Continued on 24

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April, he resolved to turn it into a documentary. He pitched his idea to a production company in Hollywood, which showed great enthusiasm.

There was only one hitch.

Before the project could proceed, Story needed to pin down basic facts about this secret gay pool party. The task began to consume him, and turned into an obsessive quest to answer three main questions.

Where was this pool? Who were these men? And, most urgently: Are any of them still alive?

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eoff Story, now 48, is a highly functional daydreamer. His bristled brows and sleepy eyes give him the air of a professor at bedtime, though his real job is creative director at TOKY, a branding firm in Midtown.

He remembers how, as a giddy 27-year-old in 1996, he bought the 8 mm film and rushed it across the river to his parents’ house in Belleville, Illinois.

Story’s father, in addition to being a retired teacher and amateur genealogist, was also a collector of knickknacks.

He frequented flea markets and would pull over the family car to pick up interesting objects on the roadside. In his possession was an old-fashioned Bell & Howell projector.

When Story showed up at his boyhood home, he and his father set up the old projector on the living room carpet. The first shot was a doozy: It showed a man

PHOTO BY NICK SCHNELLE

A GAY PARTY Continued from pg 23

wearing lipstick, a pearl necklace and leopard-print bikini top sashaying toward the camera.

Story, who had yet to come out to his parents, sensed his father’s confusion. He abruptly shut off the machine.

But he was, nevertheless, electrified. He borrowed their projector and hurried it back to south St. Louis. That night, in his flat overlooking Benton Park, he watched the rest and thought, “This is gold.”

The film (which is actually several scenes spliced together) shows men sunbathing and socializing around a small in-ground pool in a bucolic setting. Their swimsuits have belts; the automobiles look like boxy 1940s models.

Some men shy from the camera, but others camp it up with towels worn like skirts, headscarves à la Rosie the Riveter, wide-brimmed hats and dresses. They swing dance. They sing. They make

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Timeless luxury.

Filmmaker Geoff Story holds up the two original film canisters he bought in 1996.

out. They splash and tease each other. They sip on St. Louis-brewed beers such as Falstaff and Griesedieck (one man leaps off the diving board naked, then covers his crotch with a bottle of Griesedieck—“the joke that never gets old,” says Story).

Perhaps the most arresting image, though, is the close-up of a soldier in service dress who seizes a man’s face with his hands and plants a long, passionate kiss on his mouth.

Then he plants one on another man.

The soldier’s cameo points to the possibility that at least some of this action transpired at a pivotal moment in gay history.

On the eve of World War II, around 43 percent of all Americans were still living in rural areas. Gay men had to hide their urges back then, according to Allan Bérubé’s seminal history Coming Out Under Fire. Homophobia lurked “quietly below the sur-

face of everyday life,” Bérubé wrote, “coming into view only in sporadic acts of violence, arrests, school expulsions, firings or religious condemnations.” Gay men were kept “invisible, isolated, silent, ignorant and trivialized.”

Yet the war mobilized massive swaths of people, helping gay men find each other in military bases and war-boom cities, far from the watchful eyes of their families and neighbors. They fought in battles together, drank together, had sex and taught each other slang and signals and how to blend in.

The daring, live-for-today spirit of the war would soon give way to the rigid conformity and moral panic of the postwar era. But the mid1940s were a heady and, in some ways, hopeful time for gay American men. The men in Story’s reels may have converged at their swimming pool

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Continued on 26 Volume 1 - Issue 2 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

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A GAY PARTY Continued from pg 25

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at precisely that moment.

Story didn’t realize all this at first. He intuited that he had something special, but he didn’t examine it closely.

For sixteen years, the film collected dust.

Then, in February 2013, Story’s father passed away. In the process of organizing the family’s 8 mm home movies in the years that followed, Story realized he still had his pool-party reels. He sent them to Cintrex AV, a Maryland Heights shop that digitizes old film.

When he got the digital version back in the winter of 2017, he was struck by how well it preserved a moment in time.

“It was so quintessentially mid-century,” says Story.

“The colors are slightly magenta, slightly cyan. The wardrobe, the quick cuts, the light leaks — it almost looked staged by an art director.”

Inspired, Story re-edited the shots using iMovie. He cobbled together a soundtrack, which includes “Where the Boys Are” and “Secretly,” a pop-country No. 3 Billboard hit from the late 1950s with the lyrics: Wish we didn’t have to meet secretly, Wish we didn’t have to kiss secretly, Wish we didn’t have to be afraid To show the world that we’re in love.

And he added the following title frames as an introduction: “A group of gay friends gathered for a picnic in the country... They swam.

They danced. They drank too much. For one summer day... they lived like no one was watching.”

T

he first cascade of discoveries began on the evening of April 29, when Story invited more than a dozen friends to a screening at his home in the LaSalle Park neighborhood.

He lives in a refurbished 1864 brick row house with high ceilings and tall windows (he lit up the latter with rainbow lights for the occasion). He set out cinema-style boxes of popcorn and candy on his dining room table.

Guests carried their treats along with drinks upstairs to his bedroom, which he had converted into a mini-theater.

The goal was to see if the footage captivated his friends as it did him.

“I stood in back of the room, just watching reactions,” he recalls. “People didn’t get emotional, but it was affecting them. Nobody was checking their phones.

Then afterwards, there was such curiosity: ‘Who were these guys? What lives did

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they go back to?’”

One of the attendees was Beth Prusaczyk. A 31-yearold Ph.D. candidate in social work at Washington University, she only knew Story in passing. She had come to the screening after being fascinated by the stills he’d been posting online. Afterward, she gushed on Facebook.

“I still have goosebumps,” she wrote. “It was one of the most moving and amazing things I’ve ever seen.”

Continued on 28

On November 4, Story converted his bedroom into a mini-theater to screen

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Story thanked her, and then the next day, alerted her to a major find. Two attendees at the screening had helped identify a man in the film with blond hair: Elvin “Buddy” Walton. Walton had grown up near Potosi, Missouri, and became one of St. Louis’ elite hairdressers. His clients ranged from several first ladies (Roosevelt, Truman and Bush) to European royalty. For 35 years, he ran a hair salon at the Chase Park Plaza and owned six more salons, including four in Florida.

Prusaczyk responded, “OMG INCREDIBLE!” An hour later, she messaged Story with an obituary from the Post-Dispatch: “This article says Elvin Walton owned a mansion on Lindell with his ‘longtime companion Sam Micotto.’”

Micotto too had an interesting backstory. He had been one of thirteen kids. The construction business owned by his large Catholic family had helped

build the St. Louis Hills neighborhood. Micotto had served in the U.S. Army during the war, then later operated his own dog-grooming business at the Chase: The Poodle Palace.

Prusaczyk found a photo of him and sent it to Story. He had a flashback: At the estate sale, he had noticed the mansion’s outgoing resident, an elderly man with brilliant white hair. That must have been Micotto, Story guessed.

Indeed it was. After checking property records and other sources, they established that Micotto (the dog groomer) and Walton (the hairdresser) had been a couple for decades and had lived in the same Lindell mansion where the estate sale was held.

Unfortunately, both were already deceased. But Prusaczyk kept digging compulsively online for more info. Story drafted her into his project.

“You are so much better at

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Left, Beth Prusaczyk and Geoff Story answer questions from those who attended the November 4 screening. Top, Elvin “Buddy” Walton owned a half dozen hair salons in St. Louis and Florida. Above, Walton on a stairwell at the Chase, where he did business for 35 years.

this than I am,” Story wrote to her. “Do you have time to research it? Or give me pointers?

Would love to collaborate.”

“Definitely!” she replied.

They have been in close contact ever since, communicating several times a day. In their division of labor, which emerged organically, Prusaczyk is the organized spreadsheet-maker with a mind for facts and figures; Story is the artist with the big ideas and helpful contacts in the gay community.

He also has a knack for facial recognition. While studying the men in the footage, he noticed that Micotto resembled a younger fellow in certain scenes. After consulting a yearbook from Chaminade High School, he confirmed it: Both Micotto and his younger brother, Charlie, were at the pool party.

Meanwhile, Prusaczyk developed what she calls “a borderline obsession” with locating the

swimming pool. She had to move to Nashville in June for professional reasons, but after work each night, she would curl up on her couch for hours, ignoring her husband and poring over the film, often with her laptop’s screen just inches from her face. She even dreamt about the pool. (At one point, she noticed a wartime gas ration sticker on one of the car’s windshields, which helps date the footage, though not conclusively.)

The path to the pool really narrowed after Prusaczyk made contact with Buddy Walton’s family. She found his niece, who led to his old friend, who mentioned that the Micottos once owned a farm near Hillsboro. Prusaczyk paid a freelance assistant to search Jefferson County land records. He found a plot of land of about 30 acres purchased by the Micottos in the late 1930s. Still, she Continued on 30

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PHOTO COURTESY OF GEOFF STORY

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Above, Carol Stevenson knew Walton and Micotto as far back as the 1960s.

Micotto (right) lived together long before it was widely accepted.

A GAY PARTY Continued from pg 29 couldn’t find any trace of a pool on Google Earth.

But then she discovered a website full of vintage aerial photos, and there it was: a beautiful rectangular pool, right there on the Hillsboro acreage.

Her three-month search had ended.

“The world was silent,” she recalls. “It was such a release.

But I was sad, because it was over!”

E

ven with the basics of the pool party nailed down, a far tougher challenge remained: exploring the inner lives of the partygoers, including Micotto and Walton, who lived together decades before it was widely accepted.

The filmmakers found sources last summer to fill in some gaps. Carol Stevenson is a former nurse who had a client in common with Walton. She befriended the hair-

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dresser and his partner, and recalls their large social circle as far back as the 1960s.

“A lot of wealthy women wanted to go around with [Buddy] and Sam,” she told the filmmakers, “because Sam was so attractive — he looked like a movie star — and Buddy was cute too with his blond hair.”

The couple had myriad gay friends too, says Stevenson. (She remembers being derided on occasion as a “fag hag.”) Once, when she tried to visit the pool on a whim with her four kids, she encountered a group of men lounging outdoors, some nude. Mom and kids beat a hasty retreat.

In Stevenson’s view, the animal-loving Micotto was a homebody who took care of the household, while Walton, the flamboyant salon magnate, kept spending time out with friends.

During their twilight years in the late 2000s, both men suffered health problems.

PHOTO COURTESY OF GEOFF STORY

Right, Buddy Walton (left) and Sam

They got into nasty fights.

According to Susan Seagraves, Walton’s niece, Micotto would sometimes get so furious he would cuss out his partner in Italian. But still, they appreciated each other.

“They had a deep feeling and mutual respect,” says Seagraves, “otherwise they wouldn’t have stayed together all those years.”

She adds that some family members approved of their situation, while others didn’t.

But in at least one respect, Walton and Micotto were more fortunate than many gay couples of their time: As wealthy men, they had a free pass to live openly together.

Their income, drawn from businesses they themselves owned, shielded them and gave them entrée to “re-

spectable” society.

The last place they lived together was a house in St. Louis Hills. After they died — Micotto in 2007, Walton in 2009 — Seagraves found a cedar chest there with a stack of photographs. Some photos were risqué, and she threw out the entire collection, a decision she now regrets. (“I don’t know what I would’ve done with them,” she offers, apologizing.)

With each passing day, the filmmakers grow more fearful that the pre-1960s history of gay St. Louis is being discarded in shoeboxes and forgotten as witnesses pass away. Thus Story and Prusaczyk are desperately seeking out the pool-partiers.

But so far, they have not crowdsourced this task to any online community. One

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reason is practical: Brian Graden Media, the production company in Hollywood that’s interested in the project, has advised them not to release precious material.

Another reason is philosophical: Doing so would run the risk of “outing” 95-year-old men.

The filmmakers plan to create a website, asking anyone with knowledge of gay life in St. Louis in the 1940s and 50s to get in touch. In the meantime, Story is working his network of friends in hopes of making IDs. One such interview has already proved fruitful.

Last July, Story and his videographer visited the home of Jerry Birkhead, an 80-year-old gay resident of University City. Birkhead watched the footage mostly in silence, but at one point, the videographer asked if anything was jogging his memory. “The one guy in the swimming pool looks like Harry Smith,” Birkhead replied.

And indeed, it turned out be Harry Smith, who had died in 1974. Smith’s family had owned a grocery store in south city. Smith himself played the piano at the Chase, and he and his late partner Russ Grenzebach (who also appears in the film) had managed “The Ranch,” a gay-friendly weekend getaway in Winfield, Missouri.

The filmmakers tracked down one of Smith’s surviving family members: a nephew, Guy Smith, who lives near Union. They carpooled out to interview him on

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Partners Harry Smith and Russ Grenzebach appeared in the pool party footage, but have both passed away.

November 4.

Smith’s trailer sits at the end of a small loop off a state highway. An American flag fills the front window.

Smith is a Vietnam vet, a Trump supporter and, in some ways, socially conservative. But he also considers himself a “Jeffersonian” with a live-and-let-live philosophy. And the love he still feels for his late gay uncle is obvious.

“He was the father I never had,” Smith says from his recliner, in between cigarettes. The videographer’s camera is trained on him.

The filmmakers have just shown him the old footage of his uncle Harry and are trying to draw out any emotion it rekindled. Smith explains that his father always worked long hours, so Harry took the initiative to invite him out to movies and shows, introducing him to “the finer things in life.”

Smith remembers him as being a very “discreet” and

“private” individual.

Story asks him: “Do you think that was hard for your uncle, to always have his guard up and be careful what he said?”

“I’m sure it was,” Guy replies. “It was good to see him laughing and joking in that film and everything, because I don’t ever remember him being that jovial and happy like that around his parents — my grandparents.

He was more reserved.”

Story asks Smith what he would tell his uncle right now if he could.

“I missed ya,” says Smith.

“I wish you would’ve lived longer.”

H

ours after interviewing Guy Smith, Story held another screening at his house — his third. About a dozen people came, including some of Out in STL’s staff.

Like every audience who has seen the film, this group was charmed. Afterward, they peppered Story with questions

and offered suggestions on how to find the survivors.

“Seeing all these people get together and having a good time, it really reminded me of my friends,” said Kage Black, 34, who attended with his husband, Out in STL editor Chris Andoe.

Others had shared the same sentiment at earlier screenings: that these men from 70 years ago seemed so familiar — the main difference being that while their behavior would raise few eyebrows today, back then they had to drive 40 miles outside of St. Louis to feel so liberated.

“Everybody in the movie has passed away,” Black continued, “but they made that their moment. It made me realize, we may only be here for a blink of an eye, but this is my moment. And whatever is happening right now, I need to just make it what it is.”

Black and his husband did not linger long after the screening. They went out to a bar and met up with friends. n Volume 1 - Issue 2 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

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PLANNED

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| OUT IN ST. LOUIS | Volume 1 - Issue 2

PHOTO COURTESY OF ARCH RIVAL ROLLER DERBY

PHOTO COURTESY OF MTUG

YOUR WINTER,

A CROONER COMES A-CAROLING

Stage performer Tim Schall knows the winter holidays can usher in a whole sleigh-full of emotions, from the mirthful to the melancholy. That’s why he’s bringing all of them out in song December 14 at the Stage, an event space run by KDHX 88.1 FM in Grand Center. Backed by his longtime accompanist Carol Schmidt on the piano and bassist Ben Wheeler, Schall will swing his way through jovial classics such as “Jingle Bells,” “Let It Snow” and “Frosty the Snowman.” He’ll also do a pop version of “Little Drummer Boy,” which he says reminds him of his childhood. But the singer will add some depth to the set by adding tunes such as “River,” a somber ballad by Joni Mitchell, one of Schall’s favorite artists. “The holidays are a mixed bag,” says Schall. “It’s the music that really draws me in.”

–Nicholas Phillips

Holiday Swing!, $20, Thurs. Dec. 14, 7:30 p.m., The Stage at KDHX, 3524 Washington Ave., 314925-7556, www.ticketfly.com/event/1583170-timschall-holiday-swing-st-louis.

SMASH BASH!

A grudge match is upon us, ladies and gentlemen! The pent-up anger goes back to last April, when two-time Arch Rival Roller Derby champions the Stunt Devils tried to clinch a three-peat, but fell instead to the hungry Smashinistas in the season finale.

Now the Stunt Devils are hell-bent on showing that it was all a fluke, that they alone are St. Louis’ supreme squad of wheeled warriors. They’ll get their chance for revenge on the night of December 16 during the league’s home opener at Midwest Sport Hockey in Ballwin. With more than 70 active skaters, Arch Rival Roller

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Agenda OUT IN STL

Derby is our city’s only nationally certified all-female flat-track league, and things get physical. Real physical. “It’s rough-andtumble,” says Sandy Giovannetti of the M80s team. “We all end up with bruises.”

The big question is: Who will end up with more at the home opener?

–NP Arch Rival Roller Derby, $12 on game day, free for children under 10, Sat. Dec. 16, doors 6 p.m., game 6:30 p.m., Midwest Sport Hockey, 570 Weidman Rd., Ballwin, 636-230-6466, www.archrivalrollerderby.com.

THE TELETHON, TRANS-FORMED

This ain’t your grandad’s telethon! Starting at noon on December 16, the Metro Trans Umbrella Group of St. Louis will stage a 24-hour variety show on Facebook and YouTube to raise money for MTUG’s many trans-oriented programs. The tele-

thon will have a bit of everything: Musician Kristen Goodman will play a set, designer Maxi Glamour will put on a creative makeup tutorial and a team of artists will be painting a mural live for 24 hours to auction off at the end. The proceeds, gathered through ActBlue, will benefit MTUG, a 501(c)3 that serves more than 100 adults monthly. MTUG plans to use the funds to provide bus vouchers so individuals can attend the six support groups it offers. The staff also wants to hire a therapist and to help people pay for name-change costs. A new office space wouldn’t hurt either. Tune in and toss some coin their way!

–NP

Left, MTUG is staging a variety show to raise money for its programs.

Above, catch the Arch Rival Roller Derby on Saturday, December 16.

MTUG Telethon Live!, Sat. Dec. 16, noon, to Sun. Dec. 17, noon, connect on Facebook (www.facebook. com/MetroTransUmbrellaGroup) or on MTUG’s YouTube channel. More info on the website, www.stlmetrotrans.com.

Continued on 34 Volume 1 - Issue 2 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

33

OUT IN STL Agenda AGENDA Continued from pg 33 Max & Louie Productions, a mid-sized St. Louis theater nonprofit that staged the Grey Gardens musical last year, is back again with another foray into camp. This time, it’s the play Souvenir. The show is based on the true story of society matron Florence Foster Jenkins, a rich 1920s egomaniac who yearned to be a stage singer but had zero talent. In the show, she convinces a gay pianist named Cosmé McMoon to accompany her. Together, they hold recitals, which are terrible. But they’re so terrible that people want to see it for themselves — so she continues for the next two decades. Along the way, she marries Cosmé and becomes a legend. Eventually she ends up in Carnegie Hall, with disastrous results. As one New York Times reviewer noted in 2005, this play fleshes out why the gay community loves campy old ladies: Such adoration often comes from a “sincere admiration for the valiant excesses of women who refuse to accept their limitations, whether of old age, ugliness or, in Mrs. Jenkins’s case, unconditional tone deafness.”

–NP Souvenir: A Fantasia on the Life of Florence Foster Jenkins, $20-$45, showtimes vary, Thurs. thru Sun., Dec. 14-31, The Marcelle Theatre in Grand Center, 3310 Samuel Shepard Dr., 314795-8778, www.maxandlouie.com.

A CANDY CRUSH

Justin Allen knew from a young age that the line between genders was blurry. Though plagued by social anxiety, he began spending 34

| OUT IN ST. LOUIS | Volume 1 - Issue 2

PHOTO BY RICHARD NICHOLS

TONE-DEAF TENDERNESS

time at Van Ella Studios, that wellknown local workshop of burlesque, vaudeville and variety entertainment. While there, he transformed himself into a female-presenting character, Sugar Rush, who will be one of many artists to perform at the Silver Screen Spectaculaire at Casa Loma Ballroom on New Year’s Eve. Sugar Rush is a member of “The Bon Bons” (a troupe created by head mistress Lola Van Ella) and has hosted the studio’s monthly showcase. In Sugar’s signature dance act, the

artist transforms in a “gender-bent” style: stripping away layers of drag to shift from male to female presenting. “Sugar Rush is the feeling I get when I am performing,” says Allen, “the spark of attitude when I’m feeling sassy, and the sweet self-confidence I have gained in myself.” –Charles Reagan

A Silver Screen Spectaculaire, tickets from $45, 9 pm., Sun. Dec. 31, Casa Loma Ballroom, 3354 Iowa Ave., 314-6648000, www.eventbrite.com.

Sugar Rush performs at Casa Loma Ballroom on New Year’s Eve.

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PHOTO BY MONICA MILEUR

OUT IN STL Flavors

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| OUT IN ST. LOUIS | Volume 1 - Issue 1

Sweet and Greet

When a local pastry chef wanted to bring two loved ones together, he turned to dessert

I

BY Eric Berger

n September 2016, Tyler Davis decided (as many people do) that a meal would be a good way to introduce his partner to his mom. But for Davis, a pastry chef, the key was not the dinner per se.

It was what came right after.

“Black forest cake is kind of an amalgam of my partner, Matt, and my mom’s favorite desserts,” says Davis, who works at Element Restaurant and Lounge in Lafayette Square. “Her favorite kind of cake is a German chocolate cake, and his is anything with cherries in it.

So I kind of wanted to do something that was a marriage of the two.”

For the dessert, which he prepared at his mom’s home in Mount Vernon, Illinois, he started with German chocolate sponge cake base. Then he added layers of a mousse made from pecans, coconut and chocolate; homemade Luxardo black cherries; dark chocolate; a type of brandy called kirsch; and a touch of espresso. He finished the cake with dark and white chocolate shavings and chocolate sauce drizzled over the Continued on 38

Volume 1 - Issue 1 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

37

OUT IN STL Flavors pastry and onto the plate.

How did it go over?

“It was absolutely fantastic, marvelous,” says his mother, Cynthia Davis.

His partner agrees.

“It was unlike anything I had had before,” says Matt Stevens, 32.

For Davis, 33, baking is a creative outlet, and with this dish, a chance to illustrate his feelings for these two “very different” people who have played pivotal roles in his life.

Cynthia Davis raised Tyler and his three older sisters on her own in a “nomadic family,” Davis says. He attended thirteen different schools.

When he was in middle school, he even moved onto the campus of Southern Illinois University-Edwardsville with her while she studied for a teaching certificate. He also was living with her as she battled breast cancer.

“He’s seen his mom at her high points and her very low points,” Cynthia Davis says.

Chef Tyler says his mother seems “super intimidating” at first, but when you get to know her, she’s “super loving.”

“She just is very stoic and very strong because she was like a mom and a dad,” he explains. “She survived breast cancer and [bad] marriages and abusive relationships.” She even worked as a police officer for a while; today she’s a minister.

As for the chef ’s partner, Matt Stevens, he and Davis only knew each other online at first. Stevens is a science educator and nonprofit con38

| OUT IN ST. LOUIS | Volume 1 - Issue 2

PHOTO BY MONICA MILEUR

TYLER DAVIS Continued from pg 37

sultant. The two men had a lot of mutual friends on Facebook, so at one point, Davis just added him.

In July 2016, Stevens posted online to ask if anyone wanted his extra ticket to the electronic duo AlunaGeorge’s concert at the Ready Room in the Grove.

Davis replied that he was interested. Unsure how it would go, he brought “a wingman who could get me out of there” if necessary.

It wasn’t.

“We hit it off and have been together ever since,” says Davis. The two spruced up Stevens’ house and sold it, then moved in together.

They are also collaborating on Davis’ latest project: Alchemy Artisan Bakery, an online company that delivers handcrafted desserts —

mainly cheesecakes — around St. Louis. Stevens, who also does graphic design, has created all the logos and graphics for Alchemy.

“It’s been a lot of building on one another and helping each other grow,” says Davis, who also works at Brennan’s in the Central West End and was a contestant on the Food Network’s Halloween Baking Championship.

Davis and Stevens plan to put the black forest cake on the menu at Alchemy when they open a brick-and-mortar next year (they’re still looking for a location).

As the chef ’s career takes off, he is pleased to have a strong foundation in his personal life with a partner and parent who get along well — a situation he first engineered through food.

“She usually doesn’t like anybody I bring by — ever,” Davis says. “I thought if I could make something delicious, it would take her mind off [any reservations] a little bit.”

As it turned out, “I really liked him,” says Cynthia Davis. “He seemed very kindhearted and is a gentleman.”

Stevens says he and Tyler’s mom have since remained in touch, “congratulating each other on things that have happened in each other’s lives.”

“I was nervous at first but it was ultimately amazing,” says Stevens. “We have a surprising number of similarities.”

Among those? A taste for n black forest cake.

Volume 1 - Issue 2 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

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LIFE IS A

CABARET,

OLD CHUM

Physician and singer Ken Haller wants music to surprise you

think of myself very much as a storyteller — probably a storyteller first and then a singer second.”

For cabaret artist Ken Haller, the stories that weave his songs together are the important part of his shows.

“The thing about the cabaret is that it’s about creating an emotional space for the audience so that they can have their own experience rather than just mine,” says Haller.

Culturally, cabaret is packed with meaning. The French word simply describes a restaurant or club where food and drink are served and live entertainment is provided. But think for a moment about what happens when audience and performers, happily fed and enjoying more than a few of those drinks, begin to sing and play and listen. As the night goes on, a narrative gets told.

Cabaret has acquired the heady reputation of being the champion of everything from bohemian freedoms to anti-fascist politics to a modernity that celebrates the genius at the lovely edges of society, including the lives of sexual minorities and all our wonderful quirks. The art form has traveled from Paris to Berlin to London to New York.

Arriving in St. Louis, it’s a cultural bundle that’s just waiting for a cabaret performer and audience to unpack it. For an hour, Ken Haller gets inside your head with stories and songs. He begins to tell a story and Continued on 42

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| OUT IN ST. LOUIS | Volume 1 - Issue 1

PHOTO BY GERRY LOVE

I

BY Seán Collins

Performers OUT IN STL

“Music accesses a part of the brain that we know mere words don’t,” says Ken Haller — and he would know.

Volume 1 - Issue 1 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

41

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Ken Haller with his music director, Marty Fox.

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| OUT IN ST. LOUIS | Volume 1 - Issue 2

t t c m t m

PHOTO COURTESY OF KEN HALLER

Is This Your Dream?

OUT IN STL Performers

(Guys and Dolls, Music & Lyrics by Frank Loesser)

KEN HALLER Continued from pg 40 then he sings a song.

And then something happens when the audience hears those lyrics in a new way.

Because the stories are the performer’s stories, each cabaret encounter is personal.

“When a cabaret performer performs a show it is their show,” says Haller. “And even though they’re using songs that were written by other people, the way those songs pull the narrative together really belong to that performer.”

When you set words to music, Haller says, the brain processes them in ways it doesn’t process words alone.“That’s one of the gifts of music is that it accesses a part of the brain that we know mere words don’t. If words that are both in-

y i o p

d t d s s

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y h p c p t

M f s H n r w h s t ‘ s

0

telligent and affecting are put to music, it makes people access a part of themselves that might be a little bit more thoughtful and a little bit more compassionate.”

Haller can be excused his analytical way of describing cabaret’s power to reach deep into our psyches. He comes to it honestly. Haller is a pediatric physician at Cardinal Glennon Children’s Hospital, where his work includes guiding residents in treating LGBTQ children, adolescents and teens.

Sometimes, when he talks, you aren’t 100 percent sure if it’s Dr. Ken Haller speaking or Ken Haller, the cabaret performer.

“I think that what we can do is create a space for people to be truly themselves in the deepest sense and let people see what’s going on in their souls.”

Do LGBTQ people have a responsibility to keep the art form alive and thriving?

Haller thinks the answer is yes. “I would say so. I think it has a particular resonance for people in our community because it allows us to tell very personal stories using songs that are familiar.

“For example, in my show Mama’s Boy, I talk about my father and how he had had some problems with alcohol.

He overcame that, but we never really had a very close relationship. At the age of 30, when I finally came out to him, he said, ‘Well, I’m not surprised,’ and I said, ‘I didn’t think you would be.’ He said, ‘Well, I’m not shocked,’ and I said, ‘I didn’t think you would

be.’ And then he quietly looked at me and said, ‘Are you happy?’ And that’s when my piano player starts underscoring with the song that’s about to come up and I say to the audience, ‘The very fact that he asked me that question was enough for me to say in that moment, ‘Yes, I am happy.’”

And then, in Mamma’s Boy, Ken Haller sang: “He will not always say what you would have him say/but now and then he’ll say something wonderful.”

It’s a lyric from Rodgers and Hammerstein’s The King and I, a lyric first uttered by the king’s first wife, but through the magic of cabaret and the genius of Ken Haller, it’s transformed into a messenger for the universal truth that sometimes people surprise you. And sometimes those people are your parents.

For Ken Haller, that’s what cabaret is about: songs — heard in a new context — surprising an audience. What a delightful way to spend an n evening.

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43

PRIDE

of Home Ownership THE ONLY CLOSET YOU SHOULD BE IN

IS YOUR NEW WALK-IN!

Gals Grindin’ Gears Monthly Cycle creates a new space for non-dude bike riders

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| OUT IN ST. LOUIS | Volume 1 - Issue 2

BY Melissa Meinzer

eath. Taxes. Dudely bro-dawgs monopolizing bike rides. Some things you must endure, but others you can adjust.

For more than four years running, a group of women has converged on the first Monday of every month for a social bike ride: the Monthly Cycle. They pedal a different fifteen-mile route each time through a mix of city neighborhoods. Formed specifically to welcome women and new riders, the club has grown into a space for all women, including trans and gender-non-binary folks.

It all began with cyclist Courtney Cushard, who in the days before Monthly Cycle had been attending social rides and rides sponsored by bike shops, in addition to racing and commuting.

Something stood out to her.

“It would be like almost all men, like 99 percent dudes,” she says.

“It’s not always welcoming, I’ll say that,” echoes cyclist S.J. Creek. “Cycling as a whole is a big broad diverse group. There are definitely a lot of cis white men who are most visible as cyclists. They dominate cycling threads, they dominate in groups.”

So in 2013, Cushard put the word out: Once every 30 days, women should meet at the Gelateria del Leone on South Grand Boulevard at 7 p.m. and go for a bike ride.

The group has been going strong since then. (Keep an eye on their Facebook page for information about rides in nasty weather.)

Beyond just the rides, Monthly Cycle has expanded into

PHOTOS BY MABEL SUEN

Experience the

r

h

PHOTOS BY MABEL SUEN

s

Wellness OUT IN STL

S.J. Creek, far left, joins with fellow riders at the Monthly Cycle in November.

special events, such as partnering with bike shops to teach women basic bike maintenance. It’s a kind of information sharing and self-sufficiency that calls to mind St. Louis’ Women’s Car Repair Collective, a group of feminists who set up a garage near Jefferson Avenue and Arsenal Street in the 1970s so women could share tools and skills without having to depend on men for auto maintenance.

“Cycling, like so many other sports or other things in general, is super male-dominated,” says Cushard. “It’s always this tiny section of the bike store that has women’s stuff in it, or there’s one female employee and she’s a salesperson or cashier. There’s not really a space for people that are not men to go and do that kind of thing.”

A few years in, the group was challenged to stretch their definition of “people that are not men.”

“I identify as gender non-binary,” says Creek. “I’m always unsure if I’m welcome in a space, if I’m invading someone’s space.”

When Creek heard about Monthly Cycle, it seemed like it could be a great space for social biking. Creek noticed a handful of queer friends talking online about participating in the ride and decided to go for it.

“I just sort of joined,” says Creek. “I was stealthy, not talking about pronouns or anything, just doing the ride.”

After about a year, with hopes of exiting stealth mode, the cyclist approached Monthly Cycle leadership, asking if there was room for trans and non-binary people. The leadership was a little surprised by the question but immediately recep-

tive — and even asked Creek to join the governing board.

“We did not have the language or knowledge about the gay or transgender community and about their needs,” says Cushard. “It obviously became something really important to our mission, to expand not just to women but anyone that identifies as a woman.”

Creek appreciates the inclusivity.

“You just need a space where you feel comfortable, where you feel less on guard,” says Creek.

Both Creek and Cushard say there are ways to widen out the group even further. Cycling can be an expensive pursuit, so it’s important to let people know they can show up on a $50 Craigslist bike and the clothes they wore to work and join the ride.

Being accessible to all levels of physical ability is a challenge, too. Cushard, a racer, at first wanted the ride to be fast — but realized the riders wanted a slower, more social pace.

The sport requires some level of ability, so it’s not possible to be completely inclusive.

It’s also crucial to reach out to cyclists of color. Creek says it’s incumbent upon the Monthly Cycle folks to be proactive.

“You can’t just be like, ‘Why don’t we have any trans women, why don’t we have any women of color? I guess they don’t like cycling.’”

Monthly Cycle is hoping to join with the St. Louis chapter of Black Girls Do Bike for a social ride.

“I think all of us want to find community and space in the world where we can just ease in, not feel the static or the pinch,” says Creek. n Volume 1 - Issue 2 | OUT IN ST. LOUIS |

45

From the left, Makena Knight, Miss Gay Metropolitan America; Karma T. Cassidy, Miss Gay St. Louis America; Adria Andrews Miss Gay Missouri USofA.

j Crown ewels T

“Queen of Controversy” Janessa Highland holds the following titles: Miss Gay St. Louis America 2018 Missouri All American Goddess 2016, Miss Show-Me States USofA 2014, Miss Bastille 2014 and Miss SEMO America 2013.

Steven Louis Brawley is the founder of the St. Louis LGBT History Project.

46

Meet the local luminaries on our 2017 Diamond List

he history of drag in St. Louis is both colorful and politically important.

The LGBT History Project has unearthed examples of “female impersonator” news stories dating as far back as the 1870s — including one of a man who died from wearing a corset too tight, crushing his organs. St. Louis’ masquerading laws, which were on the books from the 1840s until 1985, prohibited a person from “appearing in public in a dress not belonging to his or her sex.” Breaking this law landed many female impersonators (and many people who today would most likely identify as trans) in jail.

Just as New York City’s drag queens were key players at Stonewall, St. Louis’ female impersonator community has

| OUT IN ST. LOUIS | Volume 1 - Issue 2

played pivotal political and social justice roles. In fact, it was the 1984 arrest of entertainer Michael Shreves (Michelle McCausland) and others at Uncle Marvin’s bar that finally ended years of bar raids and police harassment. In 1985, Shreves challenged his arrest in court, prompting a judge to finally deem the masquerading law unconstitutional.

Over the years, St. Louis’ female impersonators have led vital fundraising efforts to support the LGBTQ community, including early HIV/AIDS charities in the late 1980s. Those efforts often take the form of a pageant, where contestants compete in categories including interviews, evening gowns and talent shows.

From system pageants to bar titles, these competitions give the community an opportunity to

support entertainers who have captured their hearts — even while giving money to worthy causes.

These entertainers either live in St. Louis or have captured titles in our region over the past year.

National Title Holders

Mr. American National Star: Kobra Belle (St. Louis resident, crowned in Memphis, Tennessee)

State/Regional Title Holders

Missouri All American Goddess: Nikki Vixxen (Minnesota resident, crowned in St. Charles at Throwbacks Bar and Grill) Miss Missouri Continental: Moltyn Decadence (Kansas City resident, crowned in St. Louis at the Improv Shop) Miss Gay Missouri America: Tabbi Katt (St. Louis resident,

Nightowls OUT IN STL crowned in St. Louis at MCC Church) Mr. Missouri National Showman: Jace Highland (St. Louis Resident, crowned in Springfield at Martha’s Vineyard) Miss Missouri Continental Elite: Jade Sinclair (St. Louis resident, crowned in St. Louis at Attitudes Nightclub) Miss Gay Missouri USofA: Adria Andrews (St. Louis resident, crowned in Springfield at Martha’s Vineyard) Miss Missouri State: Tajh Valentino (St. Louis resident, crowned in St. Louis at the Ambassador) Miss Cosmopolitan: Chasity Valentino (St. Louis resident, crowned

in St. Louis) Mr. Missouri State: Angel Iman (St. Louis resident, crowned in St. Louis at the Ambassador)

City/Bar Titles

Miss Bubby & Sissy’s 2017: Khrystal Leight (Cape Girardeau resident, crowned in Alton, Illinois) Miss Bubby & Sissy’s 2018: Diva Coppafeel (St. Louis resident, crowned in Alton) Queen of St. Louis Pride: Tassandra Crush (St. Louis resident, crowned in St. Louis at the Improv Shop) King of St. Louis Pride: Sir Lix-a-Lot (St. Louis resident, crowned in St. Louis at the Improv Shop)

t Georges Bizet

Miss St. Louis Pride: Jinger Fahrenheit (St. Louis resident, crowned in St. Louis at the Improv Shop) Mr. St. Louis Pride: Noah Mazzarattie-Steele (St. Louis resident, crowned in St. Louis at the Improv Shop) Miss Gay Metropolitan America: Makena Knight (St. Louis resident, crowned in St. Louis at the Grey Fox Pub) Miss Gay Northwest Missouri America: Lindsay Bryant (St. Louis resident, crowned in St. Joseph) Miss Gay Show Me Pride Missouri America: Diva Coppafeel (St. Louis resident, crowned in

Kansas City) Miss Gay St. Louis America: Janessa Highland (St. Louis resident, crowned in St. Louis at the Grey Fox Pub) Miss Gay River City America: Roxxy Malone (St. Louis resident, crowned in St. Louis at the Grey Fox Pub) Miss Bastille: Tiffany T. Hunter (St. Louis resident, crowned in St. Louis) Miss Fannie’s Ball: Sage Summers (Indianapolis resident, crowned in St. Louis) Any 2017 title holders omitted by error or due to print deadlines will be added in the online version of this piece. n

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