The Dimensions Issue

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The Dimensions Issue Astral Blackness Future of Fish Feelings Flow and SMiiLEs Redefining Retail

volume 2






The Dimensions Issue


more content at All rights reserved. Please ask us before reproducing any parts of this magazine. Views expressed are those of the respective contributors and are not necessarily shared by ORANGE Magazine.


contributors EDITORS-IN-CHIEF


Jacqui Briddell Kennedy Williams

Romi Geller

Anna Ranabijuli Ashley Hackett Bailey Cho Carly Luczak Carys Anderson Faith Castle Hannah Thornton Juan Alfonso Nunez Rodriguez Julia O’Hanlon Kara Fields Linda Hamilton Maya Halabi Miles Eackles Molly Schrader Rhylee Lionberger Roxanna Sanchez Sarah Ponder Shreya Chari



Alexis Fischer Allyson Waller Tyler Lewis Violet Glenewinkel

Carlos Villapudua Ellen Okamura Isabel Canales Jasmy Liu Jordi Romano Julia Ramirez Moira Scrimgeour Reneé Koite


SECTION EDITORS Cruz Rendon David West Jr. Gabrielle Sanchez Ingrid Garcia Kara Fields Lydia Wagner Molly Schrader Rachitha Jadala Savannah Olson Zoe Judilla

PHOTOGRAPHERS Aylin Martinez Barrera Henry Youtt Rebecca Chen

table of 9


The Young, Stupid Beauty of People

On Family and Feminism



Body Dysmorphia

Life Savers



Cybersession and the Human Problem Online

The Future of Fish



Beauty Lies in the Eyes of the Beholder

Farm to Table: A Sustainable ATX Restaurant Guide



Me, Myself, and (I)dentity

Your New Party Trick: Spinach Artichoke Risotto



Kaleidoscope of Love

The Connection Between Food and Culture

contents 51


Cuban Picadillo Recipe

Redefining Retail: A Conversation with Kristen Cole



Zodiac Drink Guide




Feelings Flow and SMiiLEs Spread

The ‘90s Will Never Die



Inside Inside Books

The Playbook



The Duality of a Student

Astral Blackness: Afrofuturism in Music



ATX’s Top 10 Defining Murals

Albums of the Decade

Art by Sarang Kim Photo by Maya Coplin

Dear Readers, To be quite honest, this past year was rough. Actually, the past few years have been rough. Cheers to us for making it this far. As both of us navigate our last year of college, we’ve found ourselves looking back at our time in school and figuring out how to merge all of our experiences and skills before we move on to the next chapter. This is also true for our time in ORANGE. When we were appointed to this position, we had countless late-night conversations about what we’d like to change, refine and continue. Much of the magazine’s work, structure and tone changes with every editor-in-chief duo. For our era, we not only wanted to refine ORANGE’s outward facing content, but streamline its internal processes. This inspired us to create a culture guide and brand guidelines with the help of our creative director and creative teams. ORANGE is the largest independent culture and lifestyle publication at UT Austin and we don’t have an advisor or a large infrastructure backing us. This means that every story, edit, graphic and big-picture decision is made by our team. While there’s a beautiful sense of freedom to our independence, we’ve faced a never-ending struggle of dealing with questions we never thought to ask or never learned the answers to. When we first started to brainstorm the theme of this semester’s issue, we came up with a list of words that all revolved around the same idea: an observation of time and place, connections, identity, culture, vulnerability, homecoming, etc. And so “Dimensions” was born. As we look toward 2020, we want to reflect on what has brought us to this moment.This issue is a collection of things that we have overcome and are still battling on our campus and most importantly, in our world. Creating this print issue was truly a masterclass in both claiming and releasing every part of ourselves and our lives. We hope you consume these pieces with as much thought and care as our writers and creatives poured into them. Our world, just like many aspects of our lives, is multi-dimensional. There is no “one way” or “single path” to anything. Our journeys are never linear. There are dimensions to our thoughts, to who we are and who we wish to become, the places we grew up and the people we’re surrounded by. We must observe these dimensions before we can understand life itself. In this issue, contributors dissect ideas of self-image and self-love, homelands, race and ethnicity and the future of our oceans, to name a few. Read them once. Then read them again. There are brilliant, intentional and nuanced thoughts to every word in this issue, and we encourage you to hear them loudly and clearly. To our staff of 82, we love you. Every moment of this semester felt like trial and error, but we cannot thank you enough for your patience, support and most importantly, your dedication to us and ORANGE. We’d like to extend our deepest gratitude to some of this issue’s largest contributors, Maya Coplin, our creative director, Sarang Kim, our co-design editor and the print issue’s lead designer, and all of our hard working editors. We’d also like to thank you, our readers, for your ongoing support. ORANGE means different things to different people, but we hope you find reflections of yourselves within this issue and our digital content. Lastly, we must extend a huge shoutout and thank you to Kathleen McElroy, the director of the UT School of Journalism, without whom none of this would have been possible. We thank you dearly, Kathleen. As we stand on your shoulders we will work to do the same for those who come after us. If you know, you know. We welcome you to Volume Two of ORANGE Magazine, the Dimensions Issue. Here we go! Love always,

“ 7

I can’t be a singular expression of myself,



there’s too many parts, too many spaces, too many manifestations...



The Young, Stupid Beauty of People With Too Much Time on Their Hands


By Henry Youtt



And I’d like to think we’re the ones To dance at the end of time


So we move our bodies around a lot Collide into each other Make disaster among us Soon each of us will be a skyscraper Unsuited for disaster Maybe never the same city


Tonight we let ourselves be something to remember Go out kissing and screaming Love until it’s deafening Know that it’ll be the only thing We’ll still hear years later


These shots in the dark How crazy it is How brilliant we are


How rare and beautiful it is to even exist


Body Dysmorphia: Performing Perfection Words by Maya Halabi Photos by Maya Dandashi


lashback to fifth grade. I was a true “scene” girl, per say. I rocked knee-high converse (that today, I wish

I could still fit into) and flouncy, short, neon-colored Hot Topic tutus, despite how much my mother resented going in that store. I struggled to find confidence in my tiny circle glasses and asymmetrical bangs. Regardless of my lack of trendiness, my phases in fashion began there. Middle school was the “trial and error” phase, when I wore anything my friends wore. My apathy for style was deeply embedded in my lack of body confidence. I looked to the gym for support, where my new-found obsession in weightlifting began. As a competitive dancer and volleyball player at the time, body image and physical fitness were of the utmost importance to me. What began as a hobby to improve my athletic ability soon spiraled into a deeper dilemma: an eating disorder with symptoms of body dysmorphia. Often, the two go hand-inhand. If you find yourself having obsessive thoughts of your food or calorie intake, partaking in binge-eating cycles and purposely restricting yourself from specific food groups, you might have an eating disorder. If you consistently dissect your body, taking extensive measures to fix and alter how you look, you might have body dysmorphia. These two disorders look and feel different to everyone, but share the idea that because you dislike a part of yourself you can find control through the toxicities of disordered eating habits and thought patterns.

Fil-A waffle fries with a salad. It was one or the other. I cycled into new diet and food restriction phases often and assumed this behavior was normal because I justified it as a “fitness regimen.” Whenever you start losing weight and seeing new emerging muscles you’ve never seen before, you and everyone around you start to put you on a pedestal: your family, friends, and the people who comment on your progress photos. You may ascend to cloud nine, changing how you dress to ensure you’re showing off all your hard

Thoughts of food and fitness lingered in the back of my mind as I dedicated myself more to the gym and new diet regimens. Sinking into an eating disorder isn’t simply about wanting to change how you look. It’s widely formed by your environment and others’ belief of who you are. You begin to find a sense of control apart from the chaos of life which consumes you. I started to believe that I couldn’t eat Chick-

work. But as I stated before, these thoughts dawdle in the back of your mind. Life is going on and you’re evolving in other ways, too. In eighth grade, I was learning what habits and hobbies would propel me to define myself in the years to come. Aside from the gym, I began listening to wide varieties of music (I discovered Kanye this year, fascinatingly) and became more



influenced by factors outside of my mother’s closet, my

much attention and hard work I dedicated to my body in the

friends’ styles and whatever trends I saw on social media.


Journeying into high school, I entered what I presume was my “Nirvana” phase. I discovered Tumblr and began to

As my high school career chugged along and the amount of

settle into an interesting grunge, emo episode (that was also

effort I put into my body image became increasingly intense,

spurred from the depression of growing pains). My love for

my habits worsened. Freshman year and beyond, I joined

Nine Inch Nails and, *shudders*, a few Pierce the Veil bops

the theater department. Sophomore year, I quit volleyball

led me to dress the part of what I believed to be grunge at

and pursued dance and drill team. Despite these new

the time. I scoured for striped black and white turtlenecks,

developments, my toxic, disordered habits that once laid in

beanies, tight black skinny jeans and Doc Martens and

the back of my mind rose to the surface. Binge eating Halo

transitioned into what looked like a stereotypical “Tumblr

Top ice cream and passing up my mother’s home cooking

girl.” All the while, I stayed true to pieces that exposed how

to cut back on carbs took its first heavy toll on my life as a

Sinking into an eating disorder isn’t simply about wanting to change how you look.

student, performer, daughter and friend. Being a performer became my world. In fact, I performed everywhere, including on and off the stage and in dance competitions. I performed by pretending the way I was




18 treating my body was acceptable. I pretended that fasting for dance competitions was what all dancers did and needed to do. I performed especially well during my senior year of high school, where I felt influenced by my body to dress in ways that only made me feel dainty, feminine, curvy, but thin. I attempted to reach out for medical support, where I was referred to a pediatrician for the first time. She taught me the ins and outs of mindful eating, where you train your brain to listen to hunger cues and eat based off of feeling instead of calorie numbers and food groups. As this approach helped me in the long run, it was difficult to maintain consistently as I entered college and began functioning more independently. Entering college, I clung to these old mindsets in the midst of trying to discover myself post-high school. I knew this was traditionally a time for change, but I still felt comfort in the routine of a diet or consistent fitness regimen. As real life hit the fan with challenging classes, the pressure to do every hobby possible and the questioning of my future, I came to the realization that your body isn’t what composes your life — a pill I sometimes remember I have to swallow. There were days I would stress over missing a workout for homework or something I might find more enjoyable. There were times I would notice how my favorite pants fit a bit tighter than usual or when I no longer felt comfortable in extra-small, formfitting tops. These changes are inevitable. After all, humans continue to grow and evolve their whole lives. And that’s something I learned as I began to indulge into the world of vintage, fashion and defining myself through clothes in a way

that were more important to me than squeezing in a gym session or sticking to a single diet structure. Styling shoots and becoming involved in the vintage community, I spiraled into the fashion phase I’m in today. Frankly, I don’t have a name for this phase, because I am truly all over the place. I wear everything I feel and believe that fashion should wholeheartedly encompass my passions and personality. I dress fluidly, whether masculine or feminine. I play with patterns and textures, fuzzy or velvet. I’ve invested myself into a creative outlet that propelled me into finding myself and slowly shedding my past skin. Despite tendencies of eating disorder behaviors today, I find it is much easier to talk myself into being confident with my newfound liberation of dressing and being whoever I want.

I am the way I am because my struggles propelled me to embrace parts of myself I hadn’t before while being blindsided by body dysmorphia Sometimes, I feel very much out of place being in Austin and dressing the way I do now. It’s a funny feeling walking into a small coffee shop and instantly standing out, watching coffee-drinkers stare from their seats. I find that we often judge people by the way they dress or hold themselves, without considering that there might be a deeper meaning to

I never thought I could before.

why they are the way they are. I am the way I am because my

In fact, I performed everywhere, including on and off the stage and in dance competitions.

before while being blindsided by body dysmorphia. I subsume

Becoming an avid thrifter and a freelance stylist, my wardrobe and focuses in life began to evolve. I found myself spending much more time at Goodwill and vintage shops than I did thinking about food or when I’d have time for the gym. My growth into this new passion didn’t spawn overnight. Slowly but surely, I began self-meditating by prioritizing things

struggles propelled me to embrace parts of myself I hadn’t different cultures and all the types of music I ever listened to and compile them into my wardrobe. I found that my love for grunge wasn’t just a phase, but a concept I will incorporate into my style on a daily basis. My fervor for the history of fashion and pop-culture has welcomed itself into my closet through chunky, fuzzy Demonia platform boots, reminiscent of 1960s punk, and through boxy, oversized vintage blazers calling from the 1980s. Eccentricity has spoken to me beyond measure. Fashion brought me a sense of comfort that no other passion could do before.



Words by Lydia Wagner Art by Ellen Okamura ORANGE MAGAZINE

Cybersession and the Human Problem Online A


plague with widespread grip, social media dictates

praise us or reward us online. Goffman’s claims were about

self-presentation, splitting us in two. We exist in two

face-to-face interaction. However, social media

dimensions. Within the parameters of performance,

fragments our performance. In real-life interactions, a

or our curated behaviors in real life and online, we make

facade must be upheld to create a false impression, but

up a ‘physical’ self and a ‘virtual’ self. Each of us diseased,

social networking is a whole different beast. Imagine writing

infatuated with the screen and chained to third-party

and directing a play, but only including a few scenes in the

affirmation. We have certain ideas of ourselves that we

performance. These are the scenes that flatter you.

want others to recognize and we try to force them upon our audience. Human behavior on social media exemplifies

Our performative behaviors, Goffman said, depend on

a combination of control, curation and cybersession,an

setting. Could he have possibly imagined a shared public

equation for dissociation, dishonesty and image problems.

space like the modern social network? Instagram, Twitter and Snapchat oscillate between physical and metaphysical worlds. We can change real-time impressions with truly

Online presentation: The virtual self “Other







opportunities and the biggest threats to us,” said Samuel

‘captured’ images, moments we choose to share with the audience in mind.

Gosling, professor of psychology at The University of Texas at Austin. “That’s why many people are very interested


in worrying about other people’s opinions. Those have

perfectionism, often strays from honesty. Social media






consequences, huge consequences.”

users are capable of excessive transparency. For example, “Finstagrams,” fake Instagram profiles meant for one’s

We put on social and physical facades for observers,

closest friends, diverge personal struggles for catharsis or

especially online. We perform. Erving Goffman, a social

visibility. Finstagrams, accessible to only our closest friends,

psychologist, theorized about performance in his 1956 book

illustrate Goffman’s performance theory. These are both

“The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life.” In this work,

frontstage and backstage performance, being semi-public

he details the metaphor of self-presentation as theatrical

but secretive. There are ways to be transparent and counter

performance. Performance, in Goffman’s terms,

the controlled impressions that plague us. Generally, though,

“may be

defined as all the activity of a given participant on a given

users strive to control their public image.

occasion which serves to influence in any way any of the participants.”

Faking It An internet study conducted by Gosling and his colleagues posited that our online peers account for self-idealization.

We put on social and physical facades for observers, especially online.

Gosling wondered if social media users’ facades are accepted or if their audiences see past their masks. “(On) social media, there’s often at least some expectation, some overlap with the people who you also know from

Making impressions on others is meaningful, even urgent to

reality,” Gosling said. “So there’s some accountability,

us. Think of the barrage of notifications we receive daily.

not just being completely fake. Unless you’re going to be

They alert us that someone is trying to communicate with us,

completely detached from the physical world.”



So, other social media-savvy users see through falsities and deep inside, they want their followers to view them how they

Sure, we can be proud of the physical states we are in and flaunt them if the desire arises, but we’re dealing with a double-

view themselves.

edged sword. We hold ourselves hostage to exceptionalized

“Even in contexts where we can create false impressions,

analyzed and images on a glass screen are backed by metal and

physical standards that play into body shaming. Curated, over-

people generally want to be seen by others as they see themselves,” Gosling said. “They want to be seen accurately. You want me to see you as you see yourself.”

self-hatred. In a highly visual digital landscape, emphasis on physical appearance promotes body shame and dissociation. Craig Watkins, a UT Austin professor and media professional

But self-image is much more complicated than that. Sometimes, we don’t know how we want to define ourselves, especially online. Certain people play characters on social

There exists a great divide between the bodies we sit in and the bodies we stare at onscreen. media, others simply exude our own perception of self to others, whether consciously or unconsciously.

who studies young people’s digital behaviors, claims social networks can alter self-image. “It absolutely can have an impact on people’s image or notion of themselves (and) their perception of themselves as they’re being inundated with images from other people — people that they know, people that they don’t know (and) celebrities,” Watkins said. Watkins called it “this kind of hyper-visual culture that we now live in.” Body image changes due to an overwhelming amount of images.

“You would think that most people want to be seen positively by others, right?” Gosling said. “Well, that’s true for people who see themselves positively. Those people who have negative self esteem...they kind of

“We know a lot of social media — particularly for young people — is what we might call ‘aspirational,’” Watkins said. “It is media that they post and share that’s largely designed

prefer to be seen negatively.”

to promote an aspired self or a desired self. Choosing the

Body Image Online

event or this venue - those are all things that are designed to

perfect picture, or posting pictures from this activity or this

There exists a great divide between the bodies we sit in and the bodies we stare at onscreen. The physical body is everchanging and renewing, but the virtual body remains static. These captured moments of peak physical confidence toxify the social media environment. In extreme cases, media users

help shape how other people perceive you.”

Fat Shaming Body shaming is rampant online, but fat bodies are especially targeted and policed. Most social media users

will ‘catfish’ others, taking

experience a degree of body-related insecurities. However,

on a different physical identity. Less severe, but still deceptive

and the aspiration. Fat people cannot escape the notion

thinner and smaller bodies are often the norm, the goal

practices on social media include using old photos after our bodies have changed or editing photos with easily accessible editing apps.

that they should be unhappy with themselves — that their ultimate goal should be to lose weight, because fatness obviously means unhealthiness and lack of self-care.



Virtual body infatuation distorts the relationship between

different kinds of body types,” Watkins said. “I do think

an individual and their physical form. Every time an image

that social media has become... communities of people,

is posted, another ‘captured’ self permanently shapes how

hashtags that are pushing back against fat shaming, body

we and others imagine our bodies. The body is abstract and

shaming and embracing different body types.”

completely impermanent. There is so much allure in that. But we want static bodies. We want captured moments that

Counter movements to online incivility signify the most

affirm Westernized beauty standards: control, curation and

positive aspect of frequent social media use.

the death of curiosity. The reality is that no one body is stagnant and that desire is dangerous.

“The internet often provides a space and a voice for those communities and populations that have been kind of pushed

The Positives

to the margins of our culture … social media has become at

With transparency and moderation, diving into the digital

least a platform where they can begin to gain a voice, gain

dimension can create community and safe, expressive

recognition, form community.”

spaces. We, the young adults of this tech-driven world,

It is necessary that young social media users create safe,

spend plenty of time online — and that is okay! The important

counter movement spaces that defy regimented standards,

thing is that we use social networking to create visibility and

but our first priority should be honesty — it may need to be a

counter intolerance.

daily mantra: ‘This online performance is not real life.’

From every idealistic corner of the internet, young media

“I think, increasingly, young people are savvy enough to

users forge counter-cultures in protest. These online

know that a lot of this is idealistic,” Watkins said. “These

connections, founded on shared opposition to harmful

are images that are carefully crafted, selected and curated …

norms, actively reverse shame — for instance, body shame.

even though we now recognize that a lot of this is staged and crafted, it still has that interesting impact on us in terms of

“There is a kind of counter movement where people are

how we perceive it as real.”

embracing the so-called ‘plus size’ body or embracing DIMENSIONS




by Rebecca Chen


or this photo story, I was interested in examining people’s ideal standard of beauty. I’ve noticed

that people want to stand out in a way that society deems as beautiful. For example, the comment “you


have high cheekbones” is interpreted as a compliment versus the comment “your nose is flat” is understood as a negative. Why is this when both are objective observations? I wanted this portrait series to focus on the contrast between the differences and similarities of people’s ideal standard of beauty with themselves, so I told my subjects to bring in a photocopy of a famous woman whom they found physically beautiful and comment on what they admired about their features.


This idea is inspired by a larger project I’m working on called The Color Complex where we are advocating against colorism. Colorism in the Colorism says you are better if you have a slimmer nose, bigger eyes, straighter hair, and lighter skin. This is a mental health concern that undermines a person’s sense of worth.


















Me, Myself, and (I)dentity Words by Sarah Ponder Art by Isabel Canales Photos by Maya Dandashi


veryone wants to feel like they belong somewhere.


Whether it be among our closest friends or family, we

all want to feel accepted as we are. It is a basic human need

Soon after, my race became very apparent to me. My dad

to feel a sense of belonging.

moved back to his hometown, close to a Thai Buddhist community where he grew up. Many of my weekends with

But finding a sense of belonging is something that I have

him were spent at Buddhist festivals where I was exposed to

struggled with for years. Being of Thai descent on my

Thai culture.

father’s side and Mexican descent on my mother’s side, I have always had trouble figuring out my identity. I felt like

While I enjoyed being exposed to my Thai heritage, it was

I didn’t belong to either ethnicity. Even now as an adult, I

clear I wasn’t perceived as fully integrated. My grandmother

still question how I should define myself in a society where

played a large role in the community. She knew everyone—

everything is labeled.

especially those who liked to gossip. When I met people, the first thing they noticed was the color of my skin. Unlike my

I was born into a blended family, and I’m the youngest of

sisters who have much lighter skin, mine is darker. People

five. Both my parents had children from previous marriages

would ask questions, and when they found out I was also

and, in a way, my birth became the glue that bonded the two

Mexican, that’s all I became known for.

families together. They would call me “The Mexican Granddaughter.” It made I didn’t question why my siblings didn’t look alike even when

me feel inferior. After a while, I stopped visiting my dad as

nosey strangers would ask. There were plenty of times when


someone would stop my mom while she walked through the grocery store with a trail of kids following her. They would

I began to spend more time with my mom and her side of

ask questions like, “Oh, so, which ones are yours?”

the family. Because I felt I looked more like this side of my family, I was more comfortable around them. Understanding

“They’re all mine,” she would say to quickly shut them down.

the language also helped a lot as well.

As far as I was concerned, my siblings were all my mother’s

However, I would constantly be picked on for not being able

children. When I was old enough to understand, my family

to speak Spanish. It was always pointed out by anyone who

explained to me why people asked the questions they did.

met me, and eventually turned into a question of “Was I

My parents wanted us to feel like we were a family, no

Mexican enough?” At one family gathering, in particular, I

matter how much blood we shared. I always fostered this

was sitting with my cousins when one of them said, “Well,

idea, believing that there was no such thing as half siblings—

she’s not Mexican, she’s white.” That stuck with me.

they were all my brothers and sisters. I know his “she’s white” comment was in reference to how However, when my parents got divorced, things changed. I

Americanized I was compared to them. I had never been

stayed with my mom, while my dad moved to another part of

called that before. To me, it referred to someone who was

town with two of my siblings. My life was straddled between

of Caucasian descent and that’s not me. Overall, it made me

two places. I would split my time between my dad and my

realize how this side of my family did not consider me one





of them. Again, I began to feel like I didn’t fit in here either. When I got to college, I felt even more out of place among my peers. I started my freshman year at The University of Texas at Arlington. With 33% of the student population being Hispanic, I found comfort among people from a culture I grew up in by joining a Hispanic society. But I began to feel as if I had to prove that I deserved to be part of the group. This feeling of being an outsider only worsened when I transferred to another, less diverse, predominantly white institution. At The University of Texas at Austin, 41 percent of students are white, and only about 3 percent of students identify as multiracial. I remember chuckling to myself when one of my professors admitted how glad she was that UT was now diverse, compared to when she was a student here. The

It almost seems outdated to question someone’s ethnicity between a limited number of boxes. University may have improved over time, but coming from

more prevalent in my everyday life. With the 2020 Census coming up, for the first time in my life I will be able to selfidentify on paper. Not only have I started to wonder how I will answer the questions about race and ethnicity, but how others in similar situations will answer them as well. According to a report by the Pew Research Center, post-millennials are the most diverse generation to date. I question if this upcoming census and future censuses will be able to reflect the U.S population as much as it is meant to. With multiracial identities becoming the norm, it seems like there should be more up-to-date ways of collecting this data. It almost seems outdated to question someone’s ethnicity between a limited number of boxes. I recently spoke to my sister, who is of Asian descent, about my struggles with racial identity and asked if she ever felt the same way. To my surprise, she said she did. She told me she had trouble understanding her Asian side after our parents’ divorce. She also made a point that I had often overlooked. “You need to remember that there’s a hyphen,” she said. She explained that the hyphen before American explained it all. “You’re Mexican and Thai, but you’re also American. It’s

a student of color, it is still not as diverse as it claims to be.

okay to not be completely one.”

During this time, I realized I wasn’t as in tune with my

I have always felt like I needed to prove myself to the Thai

Hispanic culture as I thought I was. I wanted to learn more about my Mexican heritage. I traveled to Mexico with my mom and spent over a month in different cities in Central Mexico. I came back to the U.S. with the decision to become a Mexican citizen. My mom supported the idea, and now I hold dual citizenship. Since then, I have finally began to feel as though I am truly connected to my Mexican ethnicity.

community and the Mexican community. I felt as though I had to choose a side. It has led me to constantly compare myself to others. Because I am not fullyThai or Mexican, I feel as though I am not enough to fully identify as either one.I am slowly learning to accept that this is okay. There is no definitive guide to what it means to be biracial, and while I am still figuring it out, I have learned that I cannot let others define who I am.

As I am getting older, these kinds of decisions are becoming



“Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.� James Baldwin





Story By Anna Ranabijuli Illustration By Esther Shin


sian-Americans are an integral part of the American

best as they possibly can.

story. The community has served as part of the backbone of history in the United States, despite

The dream of a socially elevated life comes from immigrant

enduring hate and discrimination for its origins. During the

Asian-Americans longing for stability. Immigration is a

boom of Asian-American immigration in the early 1900s, the

grueling process that humbles those who brave it. After

San Francisco school board declared that “our (white) children

experiencing the ups and downs of such an ordeal, it’s not

should not be placed in any position where their youthful

surprising that immigrant Asian-Americans seek to build a

impressions may be affected by association with pupils of the

life of stability. Unlike many of their American-born peers,

Mongolian race,” according to an article by the Asia Society.

immigrant Asian-Americans spend a portion of their life

This was a common sentiment that plagued much of America

in chaos as they attempt to navigate their way through

at the time and incited hateful discrimination for generations

the American dream. Meanwhile, first generation Asian-

of Asian-Americans.

Americans that grew up under the watchful eye of their wise parents wish to replicate the stability they experienced as a

Along with a culture that strictly adheres to familial values,


the pressure that’s been put on Asian-Americans throughout history has determined how Asian-Americans perceive

Because of this difference in experience, first-generation

many facets of their lives. Marriage, in particular, has been

Asian-Americans typically ‘hike’ when it comes to looking

informed by the values that have formed in the Asian-

for marriage. They take their time experiencing life and

American community over the course of several decades.

will marry if fate happens to lead them in that direction.

Standards for marriage vastly differ between immigrant

Dissimilarly, immigrant Asian-Americans mostly ‘hunt’ when



it comes to looking for marriage. They look for someone at a

Perceptions of success, stability and cultural value all tie



specific time. Many immigrant Asian-Americans believe that

into the changing mindset of the Asian-American community

marrying someone similar to them and marrying someone

when it comes to marriage.

well-off socially and financially will grant them a stable and safe household in which they can spend the rest of their

Pragmatically speaking, success is subjective to each person

lives. This divergence in values when it comes to stability

based on their unique life experiences. At The University of

in respect to marriage among Asian-Americans highlights

Texas at Austin, first-generation Asian-American students

the generational differences between the two groups. UT

Arya Saksena and Yousuf Din defined success as “being able

Austin Asian Studies PhD student Anuja gave her insight into

to provide for yourself and your loved ones,” “being content

the hike versus hunt concept when it came to marriage for

with where you are in life,” and “fulfilling a self determined


purpose in life.” “First generation Asian-Americans are often raised with Because of the divergent ideas of success between immigrant

the mindset that their success is of utmost importance,

Asian-Americans and first generation Asian-Americans,

and therefore they should work towards perfecting their

standards for marriage between these two groups often

professional and social life before looking to connect with

clash. First generation Asian-Americans tend to value

another person” Anuja said.

self-fulfillment and are content living without guaranteed monetary and social gain. They look for a life partner based

Anuja then went on to explain the psychology behind

on romantic attraction —if even looking to get married at all—

prioritizing marriage as an immigrant Asian-American,

for the most part dismissing social class, race and religion.

especially those who immigrated in their 20s.

Meanwhile, immigrant Asian-Americans tend to look for a fellow Asian of similar status to serve as their significant

“When you spend your 20s and 30s, the time that many

other, preserving their envisioned socially elevated life as

people spend making connections and exploring life options,


transitioning to live in a whole other country, you grab at any sense of familiarity or stability you can find. Typically, a form of this stability for these immigrants that combines both cultural importance and a short time frame is marriage, particularly marrying someone of a similar background who

Kayla said. Kayla and Rushi are not alone in their struggle for acceptance of their sexual identities. Asian culture puts great importance on the idea of family and lineage. Since gay and lesbian

can relate to your struggles.”

couples don’t have the ability to procreate ‘naturally’, Asian

Modern pieces of Asian-American literature like “Born

Additionally, influences from the West that fell upon Asia

communities have historically shunned these couples.

Confused” often reference the importance of identity. The author of the book, Tanuja Desai Hidier, writes in the novel, “What good are you to anyone without yourself?,” placing importance on the way each individual is distinguishable from the rest. The rest of the Asian-American community typically falls in line with this train of thought, placing self preservation as a priority in life. However, the manner in which immigrant Asian-Americans versus first generation

throughout the history of colonization have made Asian countries more intolerant to lesbian and gay couples. Hayden Blain from the global startup Culture Trip goes even so far as to say that in China “exposure to Western psychiatry brought about the adoption of the rhetoric of “tongxinglianbing” or “homosexuality illness.” Western values that both formed on the basis of patriarchal dominance and western religion spread within Asia during the period of European colonization,

Asian-Americans view self identity is vastly different.

instilling the idea that homosexuality is a disease. Before

Immigrant Asian-Americans typically point to their culture

accepted in many places in Asia, and can even be traced back

this period of time, the LGBTQ+ community as a whole was

when describing their identity. Their place of birth and their parents’ homeland play a vital role in shaping who they become as a person, so they hold onto their culture and traditions tightly as to not let go of the main factor of their identity. First generation Asian-Americans are also shaped by their cultural heritage, but more so by the society that they are raised in from birth. Because of this difference in environment, first generation Asian-Americans align their identity in such a way so that they are straddled between cultural and personal values.

in history to traditional stories like “The Passion of the Cut Sleeve” from the Chinese Han Dynasty and the Hindu Vedas, which refer to the existence and acceptance of a third nonconforming gender category. Holding tight to a culture that can be discriminatory against same-sex couples, immigrant Asian-Americans detest the idea of same-sex marriage, while first generation AsianAmericans who grow up without the restraints of homeland tradition continue to push the bounds for marriage standards, especially in terms of same-sex marriage.

However, balancing cultural and personal values is easier said than done. Kayla and Rushi, a South Asian lesbian couple at UT Austin, spoke first hand about the struggles they have had to face for their sexual identity with their

Maneuvering marriage as an Asian-American is tricky. Regardless of immigrant or first generation status, AsianAmericans are pulled in different directions when looking

friends, family and community as a whole.

to marry someone based on their perceptions of success,

“I love my family, I love my culture, but sometimes it’s hard

American community persist throughout the generations,

stability and culture. While these values of the Asian-

to make people understand that I can be Indian, Hindu, and like girls all at the same time,” Rushi said. “My Asian friends support me, but tell me not to get too attached to Kayla because we’ll have to break up eventually anyways. It’s not that they’re trying to be mean, they’re trying to give what they think is realistic advice.Even though I’m out to my parents, I don’t think they really believe I’m gay. I think they still believe that one day I’m going to show up at home with a boyfriend, and everything about me being gay would be just a phase”,

as Asian-Americans continues to assimilate more within the United States, perceptions of these values are changing as younger generations develop novel beliefs on how marriage should be handled. As the disconnect between immigrant and first generation Asian-Americans continues to grow, one is left to wonder what the future holds for the AsianAmerican community, and how its view on more liberal and diverse marriage proposals, or lack thereof, will evolve as time goes on.



On Family and Feminism Words by Shreya Chari Art by Ellen Okamura


As a child, I constantly straddled a divide between

sees her, love at first sight (slow motion, blowing hair and

two cultures. I loved my American side, but I also

all), the catchy songs, laugh-so-hard-I-get-abs comedy, the

embraced my Tamil heritage. By far my favorite part of

perfect villain, and of course, the ideal ending when the guy

being Tamil was Kollywood, the Tamil film industry. If only I

defeats the villain and gets his girl.

knew then the toll that Kollywood’s anti-feminist perspective would have on my life.

As I aged and was exposed to feminist theory through friends, classes and the internet, I began to apply my teachings to the

While I want to avoid generalizations, the majority of

nostalgic movies I grew up watching. What was depicted in

Kollywood movies made during my childhood catered to the

the movie as true love would be called “stalking” today, and

Indian cultural norms of the time. They all followed one main

would most likely end with a restraining order. As I mentioned,

plotline: the hero is passionately attracted to a beautiful,

after the love-at-first-sight scene, Rajni thoroughly stalks

docile woman, though I see now that it’s really lust. He stalks

the woman, all the way up to arriving at her house with a

her, finds some out-of-the-norm way to get her to fall for him

marriage proposal. When she and her family rebuke him,

and marries her in the end, despite all the lies he’s made up

they’re portrayed as rude and selfish. So I thought they were

along the way to get her. What a catch, am I right? At least I

rude and selfish. When they finally gave in to his immature

thought so.

methods and got them engaged, they were portrayed in a good light.

But, let us focus on the girl. Through the entirety of the plot, she remained passive. She’d rebuke the guy over and over,

The thing is, even though the heroine started out strong in

but never had the guts to get a restraining order against him,

her resistance, we all knew she’d give in at some point. Plus,

like a sane, self-assured woman would. Regardless of the

it’s not like her character was built to have much of a role

sassy smirk or hard-to-get demeanor, she never stood up for

besides getting married. That’s what women were supposed

herself and had no ability to save herself when necessary, so

to do.

the hero would have to step in. This gross dependency on the male lead is how heroines were defined in Tamil films. It was reflective of the patriarchy in Indian society at the time. Not only was she a picture-perfect reflection of howIndian women viewed themselves, but she depicted the idea that Indian men didn’t expect anything more from women than being a good stay-at-home wife.

As I aged and was exposed to feminist theory through friends, classes and the internet, I began to apply my teachings to the nostalgic movies I grew up watching.

One of my favorite movies growing up was “Sivaji: The Boss,” with superstar Rajnikanth cast as the lead, it was a blockbuster

Sadly, this old-fashioned idea is how I began to shape my

hit upon release. My dad, a diehard Rajni fan, took me to see

worldview of women from childhood. It’s how I thought I

the movie with our family friends. It does, however, fit all of

would act as an adult and how I expected women around me

the tropes of the genre: overhyped hero entrance, the goofy

to act. How could I have known otherwise? It’s not like there

best friend/sidekick, that drawn-out moment when the guy

were Tamil women-centered movies for me to model after.





I learned recently in my psychology class that as kids, our

allowed her to do her residency in the U.S. She earned a spot

cognitive skills during early development are frequently based

at St. Vincent’s Charity Hospital in Cleveland, Ohio and my

on observational learning. In the mid-1900s, psychologist

parents relocated there. As I was born in the middle of her

Albert Bandura conducted a study to see if kids modeled

residency, she was constantly running around to make sure I

adults’ behaviors. A group of children were shown a video

was well cared for as well as deal with being on-call almost

of a woman hitting a BoBo doll violently. Then, one by one,

every night.

each kid was placed in a room with the same doll. Results showed that the kids acted violently with the doll, replicating

After we moved to Dallas in 2002, my mom began working

the actions of the woman.

at a hospital, but she was constantly exhausted. She decided that she was losing too much valuable family time and left

As I grew up, I was the mirror image of this experiment. Just

the hospital, focusing on nursing home and clinic.

as the kids in the experiment watched a video of an adult kicking and hitting the doll, I watched Tamil movies that

But even this was stressful for her. Once my little brother

propagated a patriarchal view of domesticated women. As the

started daycare, she shortened her work hours and even quit

kids replicated the action of hitting the doll, I too replicated

the nursing home to pick us up after school, despite losing

this propagation among the foremost Indian woman in my

patients because of it. Unfortunately, at that age, I couldn’t

life: my mother.

see her sacrifices. All I cared about was the fact that my other

I fell for the stereotype then, but not anymore.

friends’ moms stayed at home and had food ready when they came home. This is what I thought women were supposed to do with their lives, because I was seeing it in films. I even told my mom angrily one day when she picked me up in the van:

My mom, or amma as I call her in Tamil, grew up in Bangalore,

“I wish you were like other moms. I wish you didn’t work. Why

India, as the middle child in a middle-class family. My

couldn’t you stay at home?”

grandparents supported her dreams wholeheartedly and at 17 she was sent to medical school (the system works differently

I only understood once I grew up how difficult it must have

in India) in Bellary, a small town located a seven hour train

been for her to work towards a medical degree in India during

ride away. Without a mode of constant communication to her

the ‘80s. I can’t imagine the struggles she, and many other

family, like I have now, how my mom was able to grow into

inspiring Indianwomen, went through to be trailblazers for our

a strong, independent woman is surprising to me. In Indian

generation. To work so hard, and still see women displayed as

schools, boys and girls are completely separated in terms

meek and dependent on their husbands in Tamil films must

of housing and dining, and my mom has told me that since

have been infuriating.

they were so isolated, walking past boys was a sometimes embarrassing for her as boys would cat-call and make fun.

I fell for the stereotype then, but not anymore. Today, my mom is my best friend, the person I tell everything, and the woman

After medical school was over, my mom spent six months at

who sets an example for how I want to live. Because of her

home with her parents before her marriage was arranged to

persistence and dedication, I know what a woman’s role really

my dad. Once they tied the knot, she left her family again

is: it is to be motivated, to lead other women to succeed, and

to move across the planet to little Greendale, Wisconsin. For

to defy the norms set out for you. Sorry, Kollywood. There’s a

about three years, she had to study and take more exams that

new heroine in my heart, and her name is Mom.



Words by Violet Glenewinkel Art by Jasmy Liu + Esther Shin


ED lights suck the soul dry. At least that’s how I felt

have to use.” She’d clutch her swollen belly, carrying my

when washed in CVS lights. Shocking, electric, they

little sister at the time, and groan about how it’d be “a long

make my head spin. I always walked in with squinted eyes,

time before I needed to worry about anything like that.” But

maybe a hand up to shield them. It’s like looking into the

I wasn’t interested in the future or what I’d worry about later

sun, but the sun is everywhere and instead of it being hot, it’s

on. I only cared about the one thing any child cared about

clammy, cold and the roar of an old air conditioner replaces

in a God-forsaken CVS — the candy aisle. It was aisle two,

an eruption of flames. It’s like reaching the white light at the

a rainbow blur. It made me think of sneaking away from my

end of the tunnel, but instead of it smelling like the Rose of

mother’s grip. I’d gawk, run the choices through my brain.

God, it smells like soap and medication. And the ground isn’t

Before she could find me, give me a shrill talking to, and pop

made up of clouds. It’s shiny linoleum that squeaks beneath

one on my behind, I’d stuff a pack of Life Savers in my jacket.

my busted sneakers. I don’t really like thinking of heaven,

She’d always been too distracted to notice my arm clutched

or the afterlife. Besides, I don’t think “Slide” would be the

tight around my middle. She never paid too close attention

Lord’s choice in music up in heaven, unlike here.

to me unless I was doing something that would affect her image. Good thing Momma never caught me, too. I’d have

“Welcome, sweetie,” a woman with a southern accent cried

been lectured on the sin of theft, the fear of Hell further

out. It crackled and crunched from years of smoke inhalation.

being burned into my mind by my mother. Everything could

The older woman grinned a collage of yellow teeth, a stain

get you into Hell with that woman. I’d accepted my fate at

of hot pink lipstick on her front tooth. It was forced. She was

this point.

looking at my knobby knees peeking from holes in my jeans then trailing up to land on my oversized his sweater and

Behind the candy was an aisle of vitamins. My body grew

school bag on my back. I gave an uneasy smile and wrapped

cold when I saw someone was already there. A man, maybe

my arms around my the middle of my torso. She reminded

in his seventies. He picked lazily at a pouty moustache and

me of Nanny. Condescending, yet sickly sweet. The last

stared at the wide array of vitamins. I held my hands together

person I wanted checking me out at this CVS was my Nanny.

to keep them from shaking, my stomach flipped. I felt bile creep up my throat.

The first aisle was personal hygiene. I’d always come with Momma years before. She would lead the way and barked

I turned on my heel to aisle four, trying to ignore the sudden

orders at me to “not touch the bottles” and keep my “hands to

rush of anxiety. Christmas decorations, wrapping paper

myself.” Her shaking, always shaking, hand would anxiously

and plastic toys lined the shelves, almost claustrophobic in

grab at toiletries, band aids and something “grown up girls

manner. The red and green pops of color were nauseating



under the harsh LED light. I used to love Christmas growing

knew where the vitamins I was supposed to get were. The

up until a kid on the playground told me there was no magic

doctor told me they’d help me, but I didn’t bother to ask

in the world. The holidays had suddenly looked a lot less

what I needed “help” within the first place. I began to feel

bright, but I still did my best to look for the childhood spirit

sick. I kept thinking to myself I was going to be sick on this

in it, even as a teenager.

CVS floor and the condescending elderly cashier would have to deal with my puke. My hands clawed at my eyes,

Moving on, I found myself in front of the pharmacy. Mom and

squeezed my temples, and took a few deep breaths. The

I made stops here a lot growing up, especially when she was

‘prenatal’ sign swung in an invisible breeze before me, but I

pregnant with my siblings. She’d ask about every over-the-

never made it close enough to see the options.

counter medication, if it was safe for pregnancy, would there be dangerous side effects, how much of it is she allowed to

I rounded the corner back to the candy aisle and grabbed

take. I remember wondering what the big deal was.

the first Life Savers bag I saw. I stuffed it into my school bag, shielded my enlarged stomach with my arms and made a

Somehow, I ended back up at the vitamins. The elderly

beeline for the exit. A tiny kick nudged against the wall of my

man was gone. The aisle seemed giant before me. My shoes

belly, like a little push of encouragement to leave and never

squeezed and echoed, as if I was all alone in this CVS. I

come back.



“ That neverending nurturing you need



the sea has it. Nayyirah Waheed



Words by Alexis Fischer Art by Jordi Romano


t is common for restaurants to proudly boast the catch

depends on fishing and aquaculture for its livelihood.

of the day: fresh seafood sourced straight from the Gulf

This report also discussed the perilous state of Southeast

Coast. Wait, doesn’t the same Gulf Coast have a history of

Asian fisheries, warning of the imminence of their collapse

oil spills, including one that has been slowly leaking since

throughout the region. While Westerners have become

2004? Unfortunately, there is no amount of cocktail sauce

desensitized to environmental traumas, entire economies

or deep-fry batter that can mask the harm done to our

are crashing because of their reliance on the ocean. Millions

environment. We are naive to think these issues are distant

of plastic pellets, straws and other man-made materials are

from influencing humankind. These ecosystems, chains and

washing ashore and overwhelming coastlines, and it is clear

cycles interplay with one another to foster a delicate balance

there are disproportionate consequences of environmental

of existence. This balance is easily disrupted, most often by

destruction wrought by Western capitalism.

the hands of humans. Considering this disastrous record of anthropogenic interaction, what will the future of fish look

The story begins with what’s on your plate. Never before

like? Can human intervention save the resources we have

has the platitude “you are what you eat” been so literal. New

left, and will it be enacted in time? First, it is necessary to

research has found plastic microfibers and microparticles

understand how current structures of power exacerbated the

in our oceans and seafood. Not only have we contaminated

problem to this crisis point. Additionally, it is not possible to

our water, but also vital sources of protein that have been a

discuss the future of fish without understanding the scope of

staple in human diets since the beginning.

plastic pollution. Humans have created something that we cannot destroy. The world’s oceans are under attack. A study, directed by

Plastics will outlive every person on earth and slowly degrade

an international team of scientists and published in Science

over billions of years. S---, that is scary. Plastic is found in

in November 2003, predicted that all of the global fisheries

just about everything, from condoms to furniture to cars to

will collapse by 2050. The study noted that, “the loss of

toiletries. There’s even plastic in clothes. Unfortunately,

marine biodiversity worldwide is profoundly reducing the

Ocean Conservancy estimates there are 150 million tons of

ocean’s ability to produce seafood, resist diseases, filter

plastic in our oceans and each year 8 million more tons are

pollutants, and rebound from stresses, such as climate

contributed. If you haven’t already heard, the Great Pacific

change and overfishing.” Nearly two decades later, inaction

Garbage Patch is a floating island of trash that is twice the size

has propelled us toward catastrophe. This issue is not new,

of Texas, and it’s only getting bigger. Plastic pollution poses

but has garnered more attention because Western cultures

a threat to marine and coastal ecosystems as it disrupts the

are finally seeing the effects on their home turf (or should I

natural environment. Debris skims the surface of the water

say, surf).

and birds and aquatic life confuse the shining flecks of plastic as food. These creatures are unable to digest plastic, so their

Bodies of water, be it lakes or oceans, have sustained life

stomachs balloon with waste until they eventually starve to

for thousands of years. As a source for trade, nutrients,

death. Beneath the surface, there’s an even more disturbing

materials and more, civilization has been constructed

reality. Plastic will take billions of years to break down, but

around these natural resources. In 2016, the Food and

before that, larger plastics will reduce to microparticles

Agriculture Administration of the United Nations published

invisible to the human eye. The imperceptible size of these

a report that stated 12 percent of the world’s population

microplastics are then ingested by every kind of marine life,




Choosing a sustainable lifestyle looks different for everyone, but it begins with an individual who no longer enables industries that are destructive and toxic.

from plankton, oysters and clams to fish, whales, dolphins,

fishing industry and the importance of regulation.

seals and more. Since plastics are derived from petroleum, they contain harmful toxins that bioaccumulate in bodies

“The reasons I’m on the boat now are different. It used to

over time. Fish are constantly ingesting these microparticles

be, ‘Well, Grandpa’s gonna catch a big fish, but I’m gonna

and while it may not cause immediate damage, there are

catch an even bigger fish!’” said Marando, who has been

certain, negative long-term effects of plastic consumption.

fishing since she was five years old. She is drawn to the

These are the same fish that we find on our plates.

ocean because the work feels purposeful: “I’m out there to educate people. If they’re going to eat seafood, at least they

Chemical compounds and microplastics are stored in fatty

can learn about it and make sustainable choices. I want to be

tissue, which coincidentally happens to be the most enjoyable

advocating for our greatest resource.”

part of any fish. Due to biomagnification, the concentration of toxic chemicals increase as they make their way up the

In 1933, the people of Maine designed legislation to protect

food chain. What are the implications for humans who eat

their coasts, holding the state’s fishing industry accountable

fish? All of those nasty microparticles that were once in

to ensure the prosperity and livelihood of future generations.

the ocean now exist within the human body, and at a more

Marando said she was grateful for the high standards of

prevalent level than before. With every fish entree, shrimp

the Maine lobster industry, which boasts local-led fishing

cocktail or oyster chucked down, microplastics are collected

regulations to mitigate overfishing and bycatch.

and stored in human fat cells. This biomagnification poses significant problems to public health.

Consumers have power when they invest in local businesses who commit to sustainable, just and fair-trade practices.

The current United States administration has set clear

If the people of Maine could see already see the impact of



the fishing industry in 1933, the rest of the country needs

expansions for drilling offshore and on protected lands,

to catch up. Staying informed combats the passiveness that

like the Alaskan Arctic refuge. This increases fossil fuel

capitalism banks on. Be curious, ask questions and demand

dependency, and loosens restrictions on major polluters like

more responsibility from industry and government. This

corporations. While it is not an individual’s sole responsibility

starts with something as simple as purchasing sustainably-

to clean up the oceans or be held accountable for America’s

sourced seafood out of respect for the environment and its

lack of environmental protection, we must commit to a





higher consciousness of living to mitigate further damage to the world around us. Choosing a sustainable lifestyle looks

It is easy to get bogged down by the weight of these issues,

different for everyone, but it begins with an individual who

but we suggest remaining solution-oriented by approaching

no longer enables industries that are destructive and toxic.

these issues through small, daily behavior changes. Good job for remembering to bring a to-go cup for coffee! That’s one

Nicole Marando comes from a long line of fishermen. After

less piece of plastic floating around out there. Someone in

pursuing a degree in Animal Behavior with a concentration

line at your favorite coffee shop saw how easy it was for you

in Marine Conservation, Marando worked on a lobster boat

to bring your own cup and next time around, they may be

in Maine for over three years, gaining valuable insight to the

more likely to bring their own, too. Next step for responsible



“The reasons I’m on the boat now are different. It used to be, ‘Well, Grandpa’s gonna catch a big fish, but I’m gonna catch an even bigger fish!’”

consumption? A commitment to sourcing food, including seafood, sustainably and locally.

bottled water, which creates a generational dependency on plastic. Local municipalities are responsible for their

It’s important to support local retailers and restaurants committed to ethical standards of sourcing. Of course, there are apps to make buying sustainable seafood simple, including the Monterey Bay Aquarium’s Seafood Watch, as well as Oceanwise. There are a few key indicators to look for when purchasing fish. First, fresh isn’t always the best. Similar to other grocery goods, fishing has various seasons and some species may be more or less available throughout the year. Fish that is frozen on the boat may have a more vibrant taste than raw fish at the market, because the freezing process maintains the fish’s nutrients. Ask the fishmonger at the store when it was caught. Don’t ask when the fish came in— there could be days between when it was pulled out of the water and how long it took to travel to the store. Look for official labels that distinguish the seafood, including labels from Marine Stewardship Council, Aquaculture Stewardship Council and Friends of the Sea. If you don’t see any labels, be sure to inquire how the fish was farmed or caught. Whole Foods Market is a known MSC-certified retailer that also partners with Monterey Bay Aquarium. As for where fish should be coming from, it is best to purchase fish that was sourced locally, meaning within the country. Remember: the closer it was caught the less time it spends in transit. Canada and the United States have strict regulations for fisheries that protect species and prevent overfishing. Asking these questions sets a standard of transparency for fisheries that will prevent devastating species populations and carelessness.

recycling infrastructures, which creates unequal burdens for waste disposal. Just this year, China has refused to continue importing the United State’s recyclables, and has exposed how inextricably buried the country is underneath it’s rubbish pile. Experts say there’s no longer a “market” for recycling and these implications prove that these halfhearted environmental crusades are encouraged only if they’re profitable. While these are the country’s internal battles, the scope of the plastic problem extends to every corner of the globe. For a short period of time, photos of turtles with straws lodged in their noses galvanized the masses long enough for a metal straw crusade. Yes, declining a straw might make you feel good, but it is not enough to save our oceans. This is not the fault of the consumer, but of the greedy corporations that have polluted our earth for profit. Capitalism and convenience have furthered the destruction of our environment. All that considered, there are changes an individual can make that can be beneficial to the environment. Easy solutions include things like buying a Guppy wash bag to capture microfibers in your laundry and carrying your own utensils, cups and containers. As always, reduce consumption and normalize reuse. Avoid styrofoam at all costs, as it cannot be recycled and breaks up into tiny pieces that infiltrate our water systems. Critically evaluate where plastic is used most in your daily life and implement small, manageable changes to combat the culture of disposability. Social change is bottom up and that means work is needed from you, and you, and

Of course, we must not ignore the socio-cultural implications of plastic. It is almost always cheaper and readily available in low-income areas. Communities without trusted water sources, like Flint and many others, are forced to use

you. Most importantly, become a conscious consumer and individual, understand the relationships between yourself, the environment and the living things in our world to ensure the prosperity of the oceans and future generations.


43 Words by Carly Luczak Art by Sarang Kim


s manufacturing becomes more apparent in our society, it is increasingly important for some

people to know where their consumer goods are coming from and the motives behind making those products. Several restaurants in Austin are influencing the Austin food scene on a grassroots level. ORANGE has compiled a list of some of those restaurants who have their hearts rooted in keeping food in Austin sustainable.

Odd Duck

Texas French Bread

1201 S Lamar Blvd

2900 Rio Grande

If you’ve ever taken a drive down Lamar, you may have

What’s in a name? A bakery by any other name could

noticed a white building adorned with open windows and

never match the artisan expertise and soul of Texas

covered in greenery. The property is none other than Odd

French Bread, a restaurant with humble beginnings. What

Duck, a former food truck turned acclaimed restaurant.

originally started as a family business out of owner Murph

Dylan and Bryce Gilmore opened the food truck in 2009

Wilcott’s family home soon morphed into a temporary

with a focus on cooking creative dishes sourced solely

shop, then a flagship store. Judy Wilcott passed the

from the local Austin community.

business down to her son, but started the bakery and restaurant by selling bread door-to-door.

Following the success of Barley Swine, the Gilmores converted the food truck into a building on the same

You’ve likely seen their products. For years, Texas French

lot where the food truck once stood. To this day, the

Bread has been the supplier of breads and pastries for

establishment operates under the team’s overarching

several businesses around Austin including Houndstooth

goals of craftsmanship, hospitality, and community.

Coffee, Banger’s Sausage House and Beer Garden and the Austin Independent School District, along with farmer’s

Odd Duck is the perfect place to sample an assortment

markets across the city. The cuisine they serve in their

of sustainable dishes tailored to the season. Each dish is

bistro is a hearty fusion of the family’s French roots

tapa-sized and meant to be shared, not to mention savored.

and Mediterranean cooking techniques; and everything

The entrees are listed simply as a list of deconstructed

is sourced from the surrounding area. Texas French

ingredients, making the restaurant perfect for clients with

Bread has close relationships with their purveyors, like

an experimental palate, but each customer is sure to find

Boggy Creek and Springdale Farm. With the help of their

something that fits their tastes. Odd Duck’s website lists

support network, the bakery is continuing to grow and

its vendors under the Local tab of its page so customers

mature while keeping ties deep within the family kitchen

can stay educated about where their food is coming from.

from which it came.



Hillside Farmacy

Casa De Luz

1209 E 11th St

1701 Toomey Rd

It’s not often that you find an old pharmacy that serves incredible food.

Did we mention it’s also a miniature

grocery store? Hillside Farmacy on East 11th Street is rooted in decades of history. Starting in the 1950’s, the building was operated as a drugstore by one of the oldest African-American lineages still residing in East Austin, The Young family. After it closed in the seventies, the current owners of Hillside Farmacy restored the building with the Young Family’s approval and turned it into a bustling restaurant.

of a more fitting name for this 27-year-old restaurant just east of Zilker Park. On its website, the establishment likens itself to a “religious assembly,” not because it is a place of worship, but because religion in Spanish comes from re ligare, meaning to bind together again. Macrobiotics, or the philosophy of living a good life, is the driving force behind Casa de Luz; and their philosophy shines through in everything that they do. Founders

Although it serves food throughout the day, Hillside Farmacy is best known for its breakfast and brunch. Hillside’s dishes are simple and classic, enhanced by the freshness of farm-sourced foods from nearby Eastside farms. Note that the eggs here are impeccable. The eatery also supports other small food businesses by serving or selling their food in their grocery and to the table.

Casa de Luz means “House of Light”, and we can’t think






Longoria had visions far too large for Casa de Luz to be just a food pantry or a restaurant. Everything that they serve is 100% vegan, organic, and gluten-free, with a distinct meal plan for the day created from ingredients from the surrounding area. Every person at the dining hall is served the same meal for a donation of about $10, much like a family meal. Casa de Luz is also home to offices for wellness practitioners, a playground, and health classes, making it the ultimate holistic health center in Austin.


Your New Party Trick: Spinach Artichoke Risotto 45


Everyone’s favorite spinach artichoke dip-turned-entrée



Words by Alexis Fischer Art by Sarang Kim

Makes 2 servings


1 cup of Arborio rice

talian risotto provides a hearty base for a host of flavors. The dish is made by carefully combining Arborio rice and

2 cups of veggie or chicken broth

warm broth. It must be stirred continuously until thick and creamy. With all the flavor and none of the complexities, this

1 shallot

risotto is a change of pace to weeknight dinners, meal preps

2 cloves of garlic

and those new adult parties we may be hosting. While the dish can have sophisticated flavor profiles, the ingredients

1 can of artichokes

are relatively low-cost and can be tailored to fit a budget.

3 cups of fresh spinach

When the next potluck party rolls around, this dish will shine

3 Tbsp. of butter

among the dinner rolls and prepackaged cookies.

1/4 cup of cream cheese

There’s only two rules for risotto: always be stirring and

1/2 cup white wine

use warm broth. Stirring the rice will let the liquids absorb


evenly and keep the rice from burning. Warm broth must be slowly introduced. If not, the temperature of the pot will

Handful of parmesan

fluctuate and overcook the dish.


10. Ladle in the warm broth, 1/4 cup at a time. Stir until broth is fully absorbed. 11. Taste the rice, and sprinkle salt and pepper accordingly.


Pour broth into one pot, simmer on medium to low heat.


Finely dice shallot and chop garlic.


Drizzle olive oil into the pan. Wait for oil to get hot, but do not let it smoke.


Drop shallots into the pot, cook until they become translucent, approximately three to four minutes.


Add garlic after shallots are cooked, keep on medium heat.


Without rinsing the rice, add it to the pot. The starches on the rice contribute to the creaminess of the dish.


Using a wood spoon or rubber spatula, cook the rice for two minutes.

18. Add 1/2-1/4 cup of cream cheese, based on desired level of creaminess.


Fry rice in the pan, then coat with white wine. Don’t be afraid to give it a healthy splash.

19. Add spinach last.


Let wine cook off for two minutes.

12. Add the last of broth, let it cook down once more. 13. Depending on your preference of crunch, add more stock as needed. Rice should taste just shy of cooked. 14. Add another splash of white wine, then cook off. 15. Add the slices of cubed butter. 16. Drain the artichokes and break apart according to preference, then add to pot. 17. Sprinkle parmesan, continue to stir.

20. Finish off with a squeeze of lemon and a sprinkle salt and pepper to taste. Enjoy!


to make to feel better,” Mara said. The comfort food provides


is not only limited to how it tastes, but also the memories

The Connection Between Food and Culture

that it allows the consumer to remember. Food is about remembrance and honoring. When students are placed in a new environment, particularly in Austin, it can be hard to rediscover their cultural footing that gives them safety, especially while they are adjusting to life and are busy with classes. Away from home, it can be hard to find something that feels as good as your family making your favorite dish and beginning to figure out how to

Words by Julia O’Hanlon

make it can feel like an impossible task.

Art by Sarang Kim


here are many ways to express culture, but perhaps one of the most personal ways is through food. We learn how to cook from our family, and we make the dishes

that tie us closer to our homes and cultures when we need strength and comfort. This story explores the link between food and culture and how it keeps us tied to our roots even in the face of the push to assimilate.

“When I moved to Austin last year, I struggled to find places that could offer me the same kinds of Korean staples that have always been available to me in Los Angeles and Seoul,” senior corporate communication major Alexa Chung said. “There is a H-mart that was built last year where I am able to ravage the aisles and shop for the ingredients to cook all of my desires for quality Korean food.” Chung drives 14 miles to this H-mart that has products such as kimchi, Korean

Food is complex and telling all at the same time. perhaps one of the most interesting subjects one can talk about. Perhaps this is why there seems to be a new Netflix show dedicated to it each day. It allows people to connect relate back to their ancestors,to feel whole in their identities, to feel safe and to reinvent how they identify and express themselves. It ties us to our pasts and propels us into our futures. In the tangible, it nourishes us and reminds us of good times and our families. In the abstract, it is what creates culture and common bonds between groups. And that is something to dig into.

spices and Korean desserts that are not available at grocery stores like H-E-B. These ingredients are essential in order to make good Korean food and their availability revolutionized the way that Chung interacted with her culture at home.“You make the culture in your own kitchen,” Chung said. The feeling of home is something that people sometimes take for granted, and food can be the bridge that allows someone to feel comfortable in a new environment. Culture evolves through each generation, and family recipes are swept along. Food is not a rigid code that is meant to be passed down. Situations change, families grow, and cultures

In the United States assimilation is highly encouraged,food allows families to celebrate their identity. “Growing up I have always struggled with my Indianness,” senior humanities and government dual major Priyanka Mara said. “The Indian families around me were all Hindu, but my family has been Christian for at least five generations. Eating Indian food was a way to feel like I fit in and related to my culture.” When Mara’s grandmother lived with her family she would make simple meals like homemade chapati to dip in sweet coffee, dhal, and mango spicy pickles for the family. “Sometimes when I am sad or sick I will make the food my grandma used

are given the opportunity to blend with each other. “As an Arab-Latina, food is a central part of how my family and I share traditions, and it highlights the immersion of these two cultures in my life,” junior international relations and premed major Yasmin Alfurati said. “My parents raised me on their own made up Arab-Mexican fusion food. My mom uses halal meat in our pozole, tacos, and other stews because my dad is Muslim.” For biracial folks, and for all of us, fusion of food is something that we can play with to discover new depths to our cultures. Food is not meant to box us in, but rather it is meant to give us a baseline of the familiar to bounce off of to create new, exciting things.



Spicy Mango Pickles

The perfect union of sweet and spicy, these pickled mangoes are a delicious snack hailing from South India.

Recipe courtesy of Priyanka Mara COOK TIME


24 hours (10 minutes of preparation, 24 hours of marinating)

1. Warm oil in a pan and set aside to cool once it begins to bubble.


2. Cube 1 cup worth of a mango.

15 servings

3. Places mangoes into a dry bowl. Add mustard powder, red chili powder, salt, and crushed garlic to the bowl.

INGREDIENTS 1 cup cubed mango pieces 2 Tbsp. mustard powder 3 Tbsp. red chili powder 1.5 tsp. Salt

4. Pour oil into the bowl and mix well. 5. Put mixture in a glass jar and let it sit for 24 hours. 6. Stir pickled mangoes and add salt if needed. 7. Keep mangoes stores in a glass jar.

4 crushed garlic cloves 3 Tbsp. vegetable oil DIMENSIONS


Kimchi Stew Recipe courtesy of Alexa Chung COOK TIME 40 minutes (10 minutes preparation, 30 minutes cooking) MAKES 2 servings INGREDIENTS 2 cups of fully fermented kimchi 4 oz. of pork 3 tsp. of red chili pepper flakes 1 tsp. of minced garlic 1 tsp. of minced ginger 2.5 cups of water

A fatty, comforting stew for the winter, this Korean dish is made from spicy and semi-bitter kimchi, pork, and a hefty amount of umami spices.

INSTRUCTIONS 1. Cut the pork and the kimchi into bite sized pieces. 2. Combine the kimchi, pork, red pepper flakes, garlic and ginger in a pot over high heat for about 10 minutes. The kimchi should soften and the pork should cook. 3. Add water to the pot and reduce the heat to medium. Let the mixture boil and cover the pot. Let the pot sit for about 20 minutes. 4. Add the scallions and salt and pepper to taste. 5. Serve the soup while bubbling.

2 chopped scallions Salt and pepper to taste


Halal Pozole Rojo

INSTRUCTIONS 1. Place Halal lamb, one chopped onion, and six garlic cloves in a large pan and fill the ingredients until they are submerged.

Recipe courtesy of Yasmin Alfurati A Mexican tribute with a Halal twist, this filling and light soup with fresh vegetable garnishes is served best with a crunchy tostada or with the rice of your choice. COOK TIME 4 hours and 30 minutes (30 minutes for preparation and 4 hours of cooking) MAKES 6-8 servings INGREDIENTS 2 lbs. of Halal Lamb 2 medium onions 12 large garlic cloves 8 dried ancho chiles (stems and seeds removed) 1 tsp. of Mexican oregano .5 tsp. of Kosher salt 30 oz. of hominy .5 of a Napa cabbage 4 radishes 2 avocados

2. Bring the water in the pan to a boil and then lower the heat. Let the pot boil for two hours and 30 minutes. Skim the excess fat off of the top of the water as needed. 3. Remove the lamb from the broth and trim off any excess fat. Discard the bones, onions, and garlic. 4. Strain the broth into another large pot and set the liquid aside. 5. Shred the lamb and set it aside. 6. Bring a medium pot of water to a boil, turn off the heat, and place the ancho chilis in the water. Let them sit until soft (around 30 minutes). 7. Places the peppers, one chopped onion, six garlic cloves, oregano, and Kosher salt into a food processor. 8. Puree the mixture until it is smooth. Strain the sauce through mesh. 9. Add the sauce to a medium saucepan and let it simmer over medium heat for 25 minutes. The sauce should have a slightly thicker consistency. 10. In a large pot, combine the broth and the chili sauce. Bring the mixture to a boil.

1 cup of chopped cilantro

11. Lower the heat and add in the lamb. Let the mixture simmer for 10 minutes.

Tortilla strips

12. Pour in the hominy and stir.

Lime wedges to garnish


13. Season the stew to taste with more salt and other spices.



Cuban Picadillo Recipe Words by Molly Schrader Art by Esther Shin


ue bola, hola chicos y chicas! For those who have ever been to Miami, listened to Celia Cruz or downed a cafecito, then the only thing missing

to be an honorary Cuban is a guayabera and a plate of picadillo and rice. Cubans are known for their hearty, non-spicy dishes seasoned generously and best prepared by abuelita. Speaking of abuelita, check out Jenny Lorenzo, previously from “We are Mitú,” on Youtube to get a sense of what Cubans are all about. Traditional Cuban meals include arroz con pollo, ropa vieja and a medianoche, among others. Another typical Cuban dish comes from the word “picar,” which means “to chop or mince.” Picadillo, which is made of ground beef, is simple, quick, inexpensive and seasoned with love.

INSTRUCTIONS 1. Heat one teaspoon of olive oil in a sauté pan (just enough to coat the surface). You don’t want to add too much because the fat from the ground beef will drain out as you cook it. 2. On medium heat, toss in the chopped onion and minced garlic for five minutes until the onion is translucent and soft. 3. Then, add the ground beef to the pan over medium-to-high heat. You may break up the beef in a bowl or on a cutting board beforehand, or simply chop it up with a wooden spoon as it cooks. 4. Turn over the beef and make sure none of it is raw or pink. Then, generously sprinkle in the Badia seasoning to personal taste as the mixture cooks. 5. Pour the tomato sauce over the mixture, still cooking over medium-to-high heat. The picadillo should start bubbling and become thick and reddish from the tomato sauce. 6. Tip: Add a teaspoon of water or oil if the sauce isn’t runny enough or drain the pot if it is overwhelming the beef. The picadillo will be served over rice, so the beef should be evenly coated. 7. Optional: Add a few pinches of salt or even a splash of white cooking wine. Serve on top of rice and mix it together. Add green olives for garnish and enjoy!



FYI: Steamed Rice 1. Boil a medium size pot of water over high heat. Generally, 1 cup of rice equals 2 cups of water. Filling the pot 2/3 of the way also works! 2. In a sauté pan, spread 1 cup of white rice and coat with 1/2 tbsp of olive oil. 3. Set the pan with rice to medium heat and have the cover ready. 4. Once the water is boiled, pour 2 cups into the sauté pan. The rice should be completely submerged and the lid can now be put over the top. 5. Raise the heat to high temperature and taste the rice until it’s soft and mushy. This will allow the picadillo to mix well with the rice. 6. If the rice is still hard, just keep adding water little by little.

INGREDIENTS 1 lb lean ground beef sirloin tray (Substitute: Vegan, plant based ground beef) 8 oz can of no added salt, tomato sauce 1 tbsp minced garlic 1/4 cup chopped yellow onion 1 cup white rice (faster option: 1 packet of boil-in-a-bag rice) Olive oil Badia Sazón Completa (Lo más importante!) Green olives for garnish



Words by Rachitha Jadala // Art by Sarang Kim





Ingredients: pomegranate juice, ice, vodka (optional)

Ingredients: Calvados, lemon juice, simple syrup, sparkling rosé

Ingredients: thyme, honey, lemon juice, strawberries, moscato

Aries are feisty and sometimes exhibit their animated energy in immature ways. Cool down your fiery personality with a sweet iced slushy that’ll be sure to tame your childish side. Add vodka to add a little bite to this nostalgic treat.

Lighten any burdens of commitment with this bubbly drink. The french calvados in this drink will allow you to escape momentarily, fulfilling your desire to travel.

Your like for expensive items and bright colors is perfectly portrayed in this drink. This vivid moscato will aid one’s journey in search for some needed self awareness.



Ingredients: ripe mango, white rum, sugar syrup, lime juice, ice

Ingredients: margarita mix, tequila, grapefruit + raspberry juice, lime juice

Your protective and loving character can cause unpredictable moods. Balance your emotions with a tangy mango daiquiri. The sweetness of sugar syrup and the tartness of a plump mango will work together to give you emotional harmony and a satisfied sweet tooth.

This beautifully pink drink is elegant and gentle. Its artistic aesthetic will accentuate your own creative flare. Learn to indulge in yourself and resist your urge to be completely selfless by treating yourself to this drink.



Ingredients: vodka, jalapeño juice, dry vermouth, olives

Ingredients: simple syrup, Angostura bitter, rye

Ease your often stubborn self with the familiar relish of a classy martini. Your cautious yet risk-taking tendencies pair well with this spicy twist on a classic drink.

Complement your attachment to tradition with a truly old fashioned drink. This drink of choice will appropriately present you as an individual who is responsible and level headed.

LIBRA Ingredients: sweetened condensed milk, water, ice, dark roast coffee beans Vietnamese coffee is a captivatingly sweet drink. Your diplomatic nature and love for company makes this an ideal drink to strengthen your friendships over. Resolve indecisive tendencies by creating this social beverage every time.

GEMINI Ingredients: orange juice, champagne, lavender syrup As a sociable and chatty individual, you are likely familiar with sharing mimosas over brunch. Add a hint of earthy lavender to a bubbly mimosa to keep your interactions calm and collected just as you are.


SCORPIO Ingredients: vodka, rum, gin, tequila, triple sec, cola, lemon juice, simple syrup, Whip up this super boozy drink to match your intensity. Although your assertive energy is not always wanted, this uniquely strong drink will be.

VIRGO Ingredients: London Dry gin, crème de poire, lime juice, allspice dram, tonic, orange wedge Challenge your obsession of practicality by sipping on this drink. Our gin & tonic introduces refreshingly natural flavors of pear and spices that will fulfill your love for both cleanliness and nature.

AQUARIUS Ingredients: apple whiskey, raspberry vermouth, angostura bitters, cocktail cherries The independent importance of quiet flavors in this drink represent your own qualities. Your intellectual persona will partner well with the classic roots of this cocktail drink. Your more eccentric side however will appreciate the unusual fruity additions.


“ The place in which I’ll fit



will not exist until I make it. James Baldwin



Feelings Flow and SMiiLEs Spread Words by Gabrielle Sanchez Photos by Maya Coplin


ake Miles had a pretty bad week. On the first day of

“I think that’s something that I definitely identify with, I’m an

the week he got dumped by his girlfriend. The next, his

optimistic person, whether through love, or political struggle

car broke down. Without a car, he couldn’t get to his job

or just kind of growing up,” Miles said. “The fog starts to

and was fired. He then moved out of his now ex-girlfriend’s

clear a little bit in a really beautiful way. I think that’s kind of

house. Not to mention, the next day his band broke up. He

a part of it and remaining optimistic.”

was 23 and had no girlfriend, job, car, house or band. What else was there to do besides pack everything up and travel

The tracks are lighthearted, groovy and perfect for driving

the U.S. for a year?

with the windows rolled down. Folky guitars guide Miles’

“I was walking down South Congress with my guitar and I

depth, all reminiscent of Dirty Projector’s 2009 album “Bitte

smooth voice, with Bryce and Long’s vocal harmonies adding

sat with (street performers) for a second and they were like ‘Hey, you sound pretty good man, we’re going to NYC tomorrow to play a festival, you wanna jump in the van and come with us?’ and I was like, ‘Well, I got nothing else going on,’” Miles said. “So basically I packed a bag, stuck all my stuff in an unwilling friend’s closet and just didn’t know when I was (going to) come home.”

Orca.” One of their latest songs, “Capable,” originally written and performed in 2016, came out soon after the last presidential election. Fans responded heavily, seeking positivity in such a dark time, which led to the song’s studio release this year. “People really liked that song,”Miles said. “The timing was

The year-long journey took Miles to New York City, then North Carolina where he lived and farmed for the next three months. Portland, Oregon was next. There, he went on a 1500-mile bike ride down the West Coast. Eventually, he came back to Austin for the holidays to visit family. With the urge to play music again, he joined Mary Bryce and her band, Dreamboat. After a while, Miles left Dreamboat to start local indie folk and psych band, SMiiLE. Bryce, Harrison Anderson, Annie Long and Everett Bergstedt eventually joined Miles in SMiiLE. Miles centered SMiiLE around the idea that any musical instrument could be replaced with

really effective because people were genuinely experiencing depression in the face of a political leader that represented the opposite of what they wanted their lives to be. The song is definitely acknowledging the darkness that we’re facing, but it’s optimistic, and I think people liked that a lot. It wasn’t long before people started requesting to listen to (it) on Spotify.” Miles writes, produces and engineers all of SMiiLE’s music. He also records local artists at a fair price. SMiiLE built Feel Flow Studio, a recording space in their home in Northwest

great vocals, which Bryce and Long provide.


That was four years ago, and 2019 has been a busy year for

“I spend everyday in heaven,” Miles said. “It’s incredibly

the band. They released two tracks almost every month at the beginning of this year, building up to a full album set for release in early 2020. The five-piece decided to release their new music in this format to create structure as well as cater to the needs of the culture. They know the music industry moves quickly, so releasing singular tracks is more effective than an full-length album— especially for smaller bands. The overarching theme of these songs is optimism.

rewarding to have that capability in our home. But to engineer and produce your own music, it’s playing three roles at once and it’s been really challenging.” The studio takes up two rooms of the house. Drums, keys and other instruments occupy one room and all of the computers and mixing equipment in the other. Promising their landlord that the space would not be a loud disruption,




59 Miles built out the walls, constructing them from scratch. Indigo dyed canvases by Bryce line the soundproofing panels on the ceilings and walls. These panels, while not appearing too ominous, posed danger and complications during the installation process, almost taking Miles out and pushing

want good recordings, you want people’s emotions in them and capturing that with people is really tricky.” Miles said. “It requires that people are vulnerable, which requires that people are comfortable.’”

Bryce to tears.

Miles and Bryce encapsulate the Austin way of doing music:

“I had a full-on meltdown, but we got them up!” Bryce said.

structure, “do-it-yourself” is the way to go most of the time.

The idea of running a recording studio has been in Miles’ head

made their way from California to change the city forever,

all on your own. In a bustling music city that lacks industry

since he was a child, he said. His father, a lifelong musician who currently performs under the name Papa Mali, passed

Growing up in Austin in the ‘90s, long before tech companies both Byrce and Miles saw their musician parents live their lives DIY. Building a studio from scratch is not the easiest

this idea and musical interest onto a young Miles.

way to do music, but it’s the only way they’d want to do it.

“Honestly it’s been something that I’ve been talking about for

“I think it’s given us a certain kind of appreciation for (the)

years and years,” Miles said. “I feel like I inherited this dream from my dad. He always wanted to have his own recording studio, but he’s always been a really busy traveling musician and never got around to it. At some point it was like this could be my income instead of having to work other jobs to support

grassroots atmosphere that we grew up in,” Miles said. Bryce echoed Miles’ statement. “My parents to this day have always done things their way,

music, I could use music to support music.”

maybe to their own detriment,” Bryce said. “We kept bees

The couple works together to keep the studio flowing, with

kind of how we seem to do things, by ourselves.”

when I was little, my mom made bread, hippie stuff. That’s

Bryce handling the booking and financial side of the business and Miles working with the musicians in the booth. Bryce now has the opportunity to record solo music and dive into a creative process that has been taken up by working service

After opening the studio in July, local musicians and friends throughout the years kept their books full. As the initial energy surrounding the space faded, the duo are looking

jobs for the last several years.

to keep things rolling. Miles keeps an open mind with what

“I think I’ve been too scared to work on my own music and

with musicians who work with more acoustically driven

genre he wants to work with, but expresses a desire to work

definitely too scared to record my own music but now there’s no excuse anymore,” Bryce says. “We created the perfect environment. I’m about to start recording and my hope is to

instruments as opposed to those with a heavy electronic presence. In line with the song that’s the studio’s namesake, the musician hopes artists seeking some experimentation,

record a whole album by the end of the year.”

especially with psychedelic elements, come to their doorstep.

The studio space is homey. With large windows that bring

As the group continues to grow and release new music, aside

light into the spacious rooms, the mixing room even has what they call the “Psychedelic Grandma Couch,” an inviting yellow couch imbued with green floral swirls. Miles and Bryce sought to create a space that avoids the “hypermasculinity” that usually pervades studios. To them, building comfortable and musical accessible spaces simply leads to the best recordings.

from greater financial goals, Bryce reflected on the purpose of all this work. “I feel (the) ultimate goal of music is to have a moment of connection and oneness with music... and to serve,” Bryce said. “(It’s) a way you serve the people around you or the people that come to see you, which is crazy that they do that to begin with. The tangible goal is to take it to the top.”

“This is an emotional thing inherently,” Miles said. “If you ORANGE MAGAZINE





Inside Inside Books


Words by Linda Hamilton Art by Isabel Canales


ancing with Wolves,” “Harry Potter and the Order of Phoenix” and “Longarm in the Badlands” are just a handful of book titles resting on shelves and carts in an East Austin church. The room is lined with chairs and tables ready for volunteers to sit down and make an impact on another person’s life. Right in the middle of the room stands a table with scales, envelops and a box of letters from individuals across the state of Texas, with magazine racks and book carts sitting in the corner. This church is home to the Inside Books Project, an Austinbased nonprofit and volunteer-run organization that responds to letters from Texas inmates requesting free books and educational materials. The organization has donated over 250,000 books to Texas prisons since its start in 1998. All packages and their contents become the personal property of the inmates. The people that make this possible are the volunteers. Inside Books doesn’t receive government funding and is solely funded by donations from the community. “Whenever I was in county (jail) and I got out, it was important to make an impact in someone else’s life,” said Paul Tardi, a volunteer.

Along with this being such an impactful community organization, the Inside Books Project sheds light on the realities of mass incarceration in the state. That small touch of humanity has proven to make an impact on prisoners who share their sentiments through letters. “There was this one letter and this guy said that our package came right on time because it was right before Christmas,” volunteer Adam Karlin said. ”He was able to pretend that his family had sent him something when he opened it.” Karlin has been working withInside Books for about three years after being a part of a similar organization in Seattle.

The operation is an assembly line of sorts. One volunteer opens a letter, reads it and leaves notes detailing the inmate’s interests or genre’s requested on the front of the envelope. Another volunteer reads the notes and gives suggestions for books individuals may have requested. Then, the process of picking and weighing books begins. The spectrum for requests are far and wide, allowing volunteers to meet needs by providing as many books as are allotted. Book requests range from comics to pulp fiction, historical fiction and drawing books. Inside Books also carries law books, dictionaries and thesauruses. Despite the popularity of Inside Books rising within the Austin community, book donations tend to be insufficient. Sometimes, books cannot be sent to inmates because the demand exceeds Inside Books’ supply. Although most books are permitted to be sent to prisons, there are some restrictions enforced by the organization itself and the Texas Department of Criminal Justice. For instance, books dealing with hate crimes or that display nudity are restricted. Along with this being such an impactful community organization, the Inside Books Project sheds light on the realities of mass incarceration in the state. According to Prison Policy, there are over 250,000 state residents behind bars in Texas as of December 2018, and the rates are only rising. According to Prison Policy, there are over 250,000 state residents behind bars in Texas as of December 2018, and the rates are only rising. When it comes to incarcerated individuals and their conditions, many turn a blind eye on inmates every day. Simone Harry, an Inside Booksvolunteer, said this reality was depicted in an essay she received from an inmate. “I read one that I just won’t forget and it was titled, ‘Who Will Watch the Watchers,’ Harry said. “It was about how people that are incarcerated are considered less human and they die at such rapid rates and no one cares and no one investigates — no one is held accountable for their deaths.” She describes having read about how inmates are neglected



or abused by the prison system, detailing the carelessness of some prison guards. Their inattention can range from the negligence of an inmates’ allergies to hot temperatures within the prison cells when the air conditioning fails. According to the inmates’ letter, he’s watched several people die in his prison.

The organization upholds inmates’ rights to quality reading and educational opportunities, regardless of their criminal record. “They don’t care about us because we are thieves or we were convicted for manslaughter or carrying illegal substances, people don’t care about us because we are slaves of the state.

No one is watching us, but we watch everything and that is our lives,” Harry read from the essay. Inside Books received 1,500 letters from all over the state in November alone.. The effort and commitment to responding to letters and sending books out on Sunday and Thursday evenings continues to showcase the importance of compassion. The organization upholds inmates’ rights to quality reading and educational opportunities, regardless of their criminal record. Some may wonder if organizations like Inside Books actually make a difference in the lives of prisoners, but small gestures and human interactions do more than one would think. “You guys are the only ones that contact me anymore,” an incarcerated individual wrote in a letter to Karlin. “You’re the only family I have, my own family stopped contacting me years ago so thank you so much for what you do.”



The Duality of a Student Words by Rhylee Lionberger Photos by Maya Dandashi


he identities of students at The University of Texas are complex. These young adults are attending 12 or more hours of class, participating in extracurriculars,

typically have jobs and still find time for further ventures. Recently, I had the pleasure to narrow the scope upon three







represent duality; attending an accredited university while also creating music. With a unique style, sound and perspective, these three artists should be added to playlists and recognized for the tenacity they hold.


65 68

Axel Samaniego Instagram: @axelmao Axel Samaniego, a transfer student from Texas A&M University, describes his experiences as a newcomer to The University of Texas at Austin and shares the quests he encounters while creating music in a new space.

Q: When did you start creating music?

Not at all. I chose my major at a time when I wasn’t into

I first started when I picked my guitar back up in December

creative endeavors nearly as much as I am now. However,

2018. I put together a few chord progressions on guitar

I believe my affinity for math contributes to my desire to

and played with some ideas. Some time in March I got

create music.

software I needed to put things together. From there, I made little snippets of stuff to practice with the software

Q: Has your experience at UT Austin impacted the creation

and sounds I liked. Things really got into gear once the

of your music at all?

summer started in May, and I actually started making full

Absolutely. When I first got here, I hadn’t really been

songs with multiple layers to it.

putting in as much time playing guitar and making things because of school and just settling in Austin. I then met a

Q: What would you classify your sound as?

few guys who make music, and it really inspired me to set

I try to go for an Indie, Psychedelic, Rock sound. It’s hard

aside time to at least keep at practiwcing guitar at least

to classify it myself sometimes, but that’s at least what

10-15 minutes a day.

I’m going for. Q: Do you find it difficult to make music while being a Q: Did music have any influence over you deciding to


attend UT Austin?

For sure. Over the summer it was a lot easier to just take

I guess I felt like there would be more people over here

hours doing nothing but making music, but now there’s

that shared my music taste than at A&M. Although it may

a sense of guilt. Every time I start creating, I can’t spend

not have been an influencing factor, I have bonded with

more than an hour really before I feel I should just work

people over music here more than I had at A&M.

on school work, which for me disrupts the process of creating something coherent.

Q: Is your major influenced by music at all? ORANGE MAGAZINE


Khya Salahuddin Soundcloud: KHYA // Instagram:@khya_ Songwriter and vocalist Khya Salahuddin allows a look into her particular music-making procedures and R&B sounds.

Q: When did you start creating music?

It was at first when I majored in RTF, but everything

I started when I first came to college. I started singing

was centered around film which was cool because I’m

in church when I was around 8 years old. I didn’t take it

also a big film lover. My stepdad had a lot of influence

seriously until I moved to Austin.

with that as well. But I decided to major in Corporate Communications as a back-up. Music is my only and first

Q: When do you feel most creative?

option. I refuse to do anything else.

I always feel creative. I hate not making music. It’s really my outlet from school and work related shit.

Q: Do you find it difficult to make music while being a student?

Q:Who has influenced your sound?

Music is time consuming and expensive. I didn’t realize

My parents and my Godmother. My stepdad is the reason

until I started working on my first cover. To make it less

why I’m into Neo-Soul and artists such as Erykah Badu

time consuming I would type tons of verses in my phone or

and Raheem Davheen. He would make us get up on

in my journal when I would catch the bus to work. It takes

Saturday mornings, which were our cleaning days, and

me about 35 to 40 minutes to get to my job on the bus,

blast music throughout the house. He even bought my

but during that time I’m plugged in with my headphones

first boom box, my little Barbie acoustic guitar - which

and I’m just writing to different beats. Most producers are

I wish I took seriously. But my family is the reason why I

nice and like me enough to charge me less or not at all.

love that type of vibe. My Godmother and cousin (were)

Beats typically run from $25 to $1000 depending on the

gospel singers and my grandma and her sisters were all

producer and the people he’s worked with. So it’s hard

vocalists. So it ran deep in my family: Soul and R&B music.

being a student working so many hours at work, paying high ass rent, and still attending UT which is not an easy

Q: Is your major influenced by music at all?




Nef Ortiz Twitter: @OrtizNef // Instagram: @nortiz5rw Nef Ortiz, who mainly identifies as a producer, has dabbled in various sounds creating individual and collaborative projects.

Q: When did you start creating music? I’ve always made music on keyboards we had growing up, but then when I got older, I transitioned to garageband. Around sophomore year of high school, I decided to start making beats and putting them on soundcloud.

honestly, it’s not terrible. If you want to make music, it’s easy to find time in between classes where you can work on a track and keep some momentum going in your workflow. That being said, it is pretty easy for me (to) procrastinate school with working on music.

Q: What would you classify your sound as? (I’m) not too sure if we’re being honest, but something that sounds like the color green.

Q: When do you feel most creative? When I’m in the shower. Alternatively, when I’m surrounded by nature or a nice building, or just really anywhere with windows.

Q: Who has influenced this sound? There’s been a lot of direct and indirect influences, but some of the most impactful to my growth as a musician would have to be Kanye, Thom Yorke, Yung Lean, George Clanton, Kevin Parker, Sleigh Bells, Metric, Grimes, Pharrell, LCD Soundsystem, Slipknot, Crystal Castles, basically everything I listen to on YouTube. Q: Has your experience at UT Austin impacted the creation of your music at all? Most definitely. All the people I’ve met here have really influenced how I approach music and without it, I know creatively I wouldn’t be where I am today.

Q: Do you prefer collaborations or working alone? I think it all depends on what I’m working on. I think sometimes I’m pretty efficient when I’m alone, but there’s a few like-minded people I know that I work with and we get a lot of great ideas very easily. Like I already have some collaborations with my good friend Will Stegman out and a few we are still working on.They’re easily some of my favorite song ideas I’ve gotten a chance to work on.

Q: Do you find it difficult to make music while being a student? Yeah, it’s hard to make time to work on music, but ORANGE MAGAZINE


ATX’s Top 10 Defining Murals ATX Section Collab Art by Sarang Kim

1. “Hi, How are You?” Artist: Daniel Johnston Location: 21 St. and Guadalupe If you’re a student at UT Austin or a long time resident of Austin,

there is no way that you haven’t seen this

iconic mural. The “Hi, How are You?” mural was painted in 1993 by singer-songwriter Daniel Johnston on the exterior of what used to be Sound Exchange record store. The massive frog depicted in the mural appears in his 1983 album and is named “Jeremiah the Innocent.” The

for erasing an important part of the community. Felipe Garza, one of the artists of the original mural, was part of the restoration efforts and aimed to alter the mural to reflect the political issues facing the Mexican-American community of the current time.

iconography of Jeremiah the Innocent has become one

3. “La Cantante”

Austin’s most replicated images. After the death of Daniel

Artist: Arte Texas and local Austin artists

Johnston on September 11, 2019, the mural served as a

Location: 1619 E. Cesar Chavez St.

memorial for fans of his work and was decorated with flowers, drawings and candles.

This giant portrait of Selena is located right next to the

2. La Loteria Mural

piece. The portrait was actually redone just three days

restored La Lotería Mural as an addition to the overall

Artist: Arte Texas and local Texas artists Location: 1619 Cesar Chavez St., on the side of Flat Track Coffee

before the unveiling of the La Lotería Mural in 2015 because of the overwhelming negative feedback received by the community of the art style that Selena was painted

The La Lotería Mural is a landmark site and tribute to the Mexican-American community in East Austin, but what you may not know is that the mural also gives a nod to Austin’s gentrification. Originally painted in 1989 by a group of young artists, the mural contained imagery of

in. The original mural of Selena did not capture her correctly and was criticized by many for making her look similar to Janet Jackson. The updated portrait of the award-winning artist is styled like a lotería card to fit in with the overall theme of the mural.

Chicano culture in the form of Lotería, a Mexican card

4. “We Rise”

game that is similar to Bingo. The mural was painted over

Artist: Chris Rogers

by the South by Southwest Festival and has since been

Location: corner of 12th and Chicon

restored due to backlash they received from locals in the community. South by Southwest donated $12,000 to the restoration of the La Lotería Mural, as a means of apology

In 2014, word reverberated across the East Austin community that an iconic community mural — donning



venue hosted legendary African-American artists such as Bobby Bland, B.B. King, James Brown and others. Officially opening in 1945, Victory Grill during this time became the place to be for people of color as Austin was subjected to profound segregation. Today, Victory Grill, alongside a majority of East Austin has undergone significant icons such as Jimi Hendrix, James Brown and Tupac Shakur — had been painted over in white by the nowclosed brick and mortar gallery Las Cruxes. Gallery owner, Veronica Ortuño, said it wasn’t her intention to cause a stir, according to Austin Monthly, and that the gallery’s actions were not done in a spirit of erasure, rather of haste. Community members saw the action as further reflection of an ever-changing East Austin, where displacement is evident and history has been threatened by the reigns of a gentrification.

Local nonprofit Six

Square— an organization that prioritizes preserving East Austin’s Black history— hosted various meetings to address the mural’s erasure, eventually leading to the organization gaining ownership of the mural wall until 2021. Artists Chris Rogers repainted his original mural on Feb. 17, 2018, and what stands today is mural eclipsing the cultural multifacetedness of East Austin.

gentrification. Yet and still, Victory Grill is forever held in high regards in the East Austin community and especially Austin’s African-American community.

6. “Greetings from Austin” Artist: Todd Sanders and Rory Skagen Location: 1720 S. 1st St The Greeting from Austin mural is a historical Austin, Texas landmark for Austinites as well as tourists from all over the world. The particular mural is heralded amongst the finest murals has to offer. The mural was initially painted by artist Todd Saunders and Rory Skagen in 1998 and has been beloved by the Austin community ever since. This was showcased in 2013 when an Austin family gathered 10,000 dollars in donations in order to restore the mural after it began deteriorating. Today, the Greetings from Austin mural remains a staple a landmark in Austin.

5. “Still Standing” Artist: Trust Your Struggle Artists Collective

7. Hillside Theater Mural

Location: 1104 E. 11th St. (Victory Grill)

Artist: Raúl Valdez

The Victory Grill mural that was crafted on the historic East Austin blues venue, Victory Grill, is unquestionably an artistic spectacle. However, it is the significance and rich history of Victory Grill that goes way deeper. This

Location: 2100 E. Third St. Artist and Mexican rights activist Rúal Valdez has been constructing mural paintings for over 50 years. One of Valdezes’ more popular murals is the Hillside Theatre


mural which was painted in 1978, and is one of Austin’s finest murals to date. Upon many things, the mural depicts contemporary art and Mexican American culture and was restored in 2011 following vandalism and deterioration.

8. “Reflections” Artist: Reginald C. Adams Location: 911 E 11th Street Houston artist Reginald Adams created a mosaic masterpiece out of multi-colored glass and porcelain tiles, escapulating pockets of the East Austin’s Black history. The mural includes portraits of Wilhelmina Ruth Fitzgerald Delco, the first woman to hold the position of Speaker Pro Tempore in the Texas House of Representatives, and William T. Dedrick, son of “one of the first freed slaves in Travis County” who was a pivotal leader in the Austin community.

9. “Map Your Roots” Artist: Creative Action’s Color Squad Location: 2921 E. 17th St., Building B Complete with bright hues, “Map Your Roots” tells the story of Austin’s of Chestnut neighborhood, chronicling three time periods: the 1960s, 1970s-1980s and the present and future. Created by local teen artists from the nonprofit Creative Action, a program that helps youth experience holistic growth and garner creativity and developmental skills, the mural touches on several themes: agriculture, civil rights, environmental justice and hope.

10. For La Raza” Artist: Robert Herrera and Oscar Cortez Location: Holly Street Power Plant “For La Raza,” is a mural with an almost 30 year history. Representative of the Chicano heritage of Austin’s Holly Shores community and painted originally in 1992, the expansive mural contains various symbols, paying homage to local activism and rich history. Community organization Arte Texas, which works to preserve local historic murals and create new works of art, led the mural’s restoration efforts. Bold, gold letters spelling out “Azteca” and brown fists grouped in solidarity are just some of the mural’s focal points. DIMENSIONS


“ Time is this really fluid thing.



Now is now, but the past is now and the future too.



Naima Safia Sandy


Redefining Retail: A Conversation with Kristen Cole Words by Kennedy Williams Art by Sarang Kim


risten Cole is the president and chief creative

Q: Could you walk me through your career? How did you get

officer of Forty Five Ten, a Dallas-based luxury

to this current moment?

retailer that merges the fashion and art worlds, creating dynamic and eclectic spaces. Cole is the backbone of Forty Five Ten, which opened its seventh brick-andmortar store in New York’s Hudson Yards this past spring. If Cole is your older cousin, Forty Five ten is the closet she lets you rummage through to borrow clothes, full of pieces from emerging designers, vintage finds and endless inspiration. We spoke about the rise of concept stores, the changing landscape of the fashion industry and modern Texas fashion.

I’ve been working in fashion my entire career. I used to live in New York, and I got my undergraduate degree at New York University. I have two business degrees from NYU. I also have a minor in women’s studies, which has always been a guiding light in my career. I’m into women’s empowerment and feminism. I wanted to always look at fashion through that angle of empowerment. I went to Parsons School of Design for a graduate fashion design program. I’ve always either worked in the realm of fashion design and styling. After living in New York, I went to Los Angeles where I cofounded a fashion concept store called TENOVERSIX, which was meant to be an experimental concept store grounded in the idea of merging independent fashion and the community of young designers with design objects and industrial design. There was this cool thing happening at the time with a lot of graduates from NYU, Pratt and the Rhode Island School of Design. There was such a new approach in lighting, interior design, furniture and ceramics and I was really interested in that interplay. TENOVERSIX was really meant to be an experimental start to mixing fashion, art and design. From there I moved to Austin and I was the fashion director at ByGeorge, which is owned by a friend of mine. I provided the creative direction on the brand side and the fashion direction as well which involves selecting the roster of designers, doing the buys and curating the store. I moved to Dallas a year and a half ago to pursue leading Forty Five Ten in its next iteration. Forty Five Ten acquired TENOVERSIX so it was incorporated into the new Forty Five Ten vision which is meant to be multidimensional in terms of our product mix and experience.



Q: I actually found out about you through TENOVERSIX. I

full of really fun things, our New York store and spaces in

started my college career at NYU, actually, so it’s funny that

Miami, Aspen and Napa Valley.

you went there and I found out about your work while at NYU. That’s so cool. There’s a lot of similarities in our paths.

Q: How do you balance curation? How do you speak to different customers while maintaining a unified vision?

Q:The TENOVERSIX in Dallas became a really safe space for

I never try to be everything to everyone. I really just try to

me to hide away in and be creative and find inspiration. It

follow my guiding light. I will tell you, we don’t make a lot

validated me having interdisciplinary interests as well.

of money on our art books but they mean a lot to me. It’s a

That’s so amazing to hear. I remember going to Colette in

part of education and informing a lot of the conversations we

Paris and being so inspired by the vibe of the store. It really

have. It’s always a balance. Myself and the buying team work

introduced some old ideas in a new way to me and I’ve

on this, but it’s always a conversation about what designers

tried to do that through all of the stores. When we brought

we love, what we’re wearing and who is pushing the limits

TENOVERSIX to Dallas it was also about bringing a lot of the

conceptually. We also have to think about who would make a

cool indie magazines to the store and having great pieces

good partner when thinking about the business side. There’s

of pottery along with great clothes because it’s all about

always a multipronged analysis of every move we make. We

creating a broader cultural conversation.

just added Forty Five Ten Vintage, which is really exciting. It’s something that I’m passionate about from a sustainability

Q: What were some of your biggest lessons at TENOVERSIX

point of view and an education perspective. We have about

and how did they help you as transitioned into your role at

7,000 square feet of vintage in the Dallas store and now it’s

Forty Five Ten?

also in the New York store. It’s all about keeping current and

Owning your own business is so hard and challenging, but

experimenting with new ideas.

there really is no way to learn every single part of a business without rolling up your sleeves. As I now run a much bigger

Q: What void in the market do you think Forty Five Ten speaks

organization, I not only fall back on my education but also

to? Why do you think you’ve been able to expand and have so

the experience of knowing every single part of a business.

many iterations?

That’s been really valuable. I feel like I’m really in a spot

One thing I’m trying to do here is show the aesthetic

in my career where I can take lessons and use them to be

intersections between fashion, art and design. On a more

successful in a larger platform. I know how to run little

meaningful level, I always have these guiding pillars of

stores well and that was helpful in how I approached the

educating, empowering and inspiring. I think Forty Five Ten

expansion of Forty Five Ten. We have seven stores in our

fills the void in fashion around inclusive fashion. We don’t

portfolio: our main store in downtown Dallas, a hotel shop

want to talk down to anyone. We want to include people

in the Joule hotel, a store in Highland Park which is chock

in the conversation and bring them along for the ride. We


75 want people to leave our stores feeling and looking better. That’s a real mission for us. Fashion, especially fashion with a capital F, can be exclusive at times and I don’t think that’s what it’s intended for. That’s a main guiding tenet. Q: Sure, I think escapism is important in times like these. Yes, we all have a lot of stress. If people take the time to go shopping we want people to have the best possible

We’re all about creating meaningful moments instead of quick, superficial fixes. experience. Q: Many brick-and-mortar stores have been closing due to shifts in the market and the fashion industry. I’m thinking of retailers like Collette and Barneys. How do you think brickand-mortar stores can survive? I’m a brick and mortar girl.I design all of our spaces and I want people to have a connection to the environments. I love the entire conversation. I think to be successful in brick-andmortar today you have to deliver on the experiential part of the business. We want you to come in and feel good, be inspired, hear good music, look at the art and maybe even grab a coffee or have a drink with your girlfriends. We want people to have the 360 experience, especially in what can be difficult times. We want to offer people an escape and have shopping be more than a transaction.

space is very crowded and value oriented. We want people to come into our stores and touch and feel the clothes and form relationships with our stylists. We’re all about creating

Q: Forty Five Ten has strayed from many traditional e-commerce spaces. I find that really interesting with the hype-based social media moment we’re in now where visibility is everything. How do you balance creating a store that has many beautiful, eye-catching spaces that people capture for social media with creating long-lasting moments and relationships? We try to see our brick-and-mortar stores as the experience and assortment that we want to translate digitally. We want to use our online spaces, whether it’s Instagram our or e-commerce store, as additives to the in-person experience and not our entire business. Our digital spaces help connect our clients with our products, but the in-person connections clients make with us are the most important. The e-commerce

meaningful moments instead of quick, superficial fixes. Q: Forty Five Ten was founded in 2000 and we are coming to the close of your second year with the company. I understand that you’ve only been a part of the Forty Five Ten team for a short while, but how would you describe its first 20 years and what new direction would you like to take the company starting in 2020. I can’t speak to Forty Five Ten’s entire history because it wasn’t mine. But Forty Five Ten was really founded on the premise of providing great luxury designer and great service to customers in Dallas. It has been really well done so far. My vision for the next iteration of Forty Five Ten is to really enter the space of Forty Five Ten being a true lifestyle store that is nationally recognized. I want us to be known for our edit and


76 our aesthetic and how we offer a multi-dimensional space that allows customers to cross-shop.

in the culture in Texas, and I love any place that has a strong culture. It’s a great culture to lean into for fashion

Q: You’ve lived in Texas for several years now. There are many stereotypes and perceptions surrounding Texas fashion. How would you describe Texas fashion? I’m an East Coast girl and I moved to California and had my mind expanded by their approach to lifestyle. I feel the same way about Texas. My time here has only been expansive. People outside of Texas many not know this, but there is an audience here for really high-concept, fashion-forward clothes. One thing I love about Texans is how warm and inviting they are. I love the enthusiasm of art. There are such great supporters of the art community, especially in Dallas. People dress in Dallas in a serious way. I’ve so enjoyed buying for this market for the past six years. Q: In what ways do you think Forty Five Ten speaks to a new era in Texas fashion, if at all? I’m trying to speak to someone that is empowered, follows high fashion and is interested in art. They’re who I have in mind when I’m buying. Texas is such a funny thing from afar. I’ll meet people when I’m traveling and they are like ‘Oh, you don’t wear cowboy boots?’ People are really interested

and, overarchingly, I’m trying to buy for a certain person no matter where they are geographically. Q: What are you excited about? Are there any artists, designers, brands or writers that come to mind? We are always engaged in a lot of exciting things. I love finding new designers. I’m working with the Council of Fashion Designers of America on some mentorship programs. We’re always finding some new designers early. We’ve bought into Christopher John Rogers, who just won the CFDA/Vogue Fashion Fund, so we’ll have him out in the spring for a trunk show. It’s all about collaborating with emerging designers and getting their collections known in new markets. I really enjoy our art collaborations. We just had a collaboration with Katie Stout who is a ceramicist at our New York store. She made a very dimensional display for our store in new york that’s a sculpture but it’s also a clothing rack. She made all of the clothes, too. It’s all about blurring the lines between art, fashion and design. I love working with designers and figuring out how we can incorporate their work into our design and products.



Words by Violet Glenewinkel Art by Carlos Villapudua


Resurgence A

78 “appearance of the world... has changed hardly at all” when you don’t count modern technology. The trends

s one of the most iconic decades of the 20th

are similar. The brands are still there. Music, film and

century, the 1980s were not as peaceful as some

other media draw inspiration from the ‘80s and other

may say. With the Cold War still raging, domestic fear

decades. America is still pushing against racial injustice

of Russia, foreign political influence and communism

and inequality. Russia is still in our sphere of influence

was embedded in American life. The Iran-Contra Affair

since the 2016 campaign.

(“Irangate”) shook the political climate further. The AIDS epidemic caused medical havoc among unsuspecting

Some might say technology separates modern culture

communities and stigma toward minority groups. This

from the American life of 20 or 30 years ago. Anderson

instability created a tense atmosphere in the U.S. (and

denies this and said technology has actually “reinforced

these are just three events) while, on the other hand, a

the nostalgic cultural gaze.” Now the internet gives people

total pop culture revolution was growing.

access to “every old image and recorded sound, the future has arrived and it’s all about dreaming of the past.”

Pop culture went through a revolution as the ‘80s came into view. Synths, hair-rock, new wave and the “Invasion

The entertainment industry constantly looks back on

of the Brits” transformed the music industry across

iconic decades like the ‘80s and pulls inspiration from

genres. Madonna’s “Like a Virgin” shocked the world

them. Hollywood today is full of remakes and sequels

with her never-before-seen racey public performance

to decades-ago films. Stranger Things, the largest and

and direct sexual connotations, and Michael Jackson

most successful Netflix Original, is based in that decade

became the king of pop, as we all know. Musicians like

and entirely inspired from films and shows from then..

Eddie Van Halen of Van Halen and Bono ofU2 catalysed

According to Vulture writer Dan Reilly, musicians such as

the rock genre. David Bowie was still prime and iconic as

Grimes, Tame Impala and Blood Orange “appreciated the

ever. Classic films like “The Breakfast Club” and other

[80s] tracks without sarcasm” and embedded the sounds

Hughes movies romanticized the teenage gaze at a time

into their own work. With internet access, these influences

when Hollywood continued the ‘70s horror film breakout

can be discovered, interpreted and produced in all sorts

- the ‘70s brought along films like “The Shining” and “The

of media today.

Evil Dead.” Music Television, better known as MTV, took over American households with its music videos and live

Why is contemporary culture tapping back into almost

performances, with young adults glued to their screens.

forty years prior? It all comes down to one thing - nostalgia. It sells like sex. In a period of political turmoil, divisive

Fashion ranged anywhere from work out gear, shoulder

partisanship and uncertainty of the climate, everyone is

pads, combat boots and chunky jewelry. Nike and Adidas

“too busy.” People want to look back on “simple” times

were at the top for sportswear while Gucci bags and

that weren’t all that simple in reality. The same generation

swatch watches were the ideal accessory. New wave, post-

that lived through the ‘80s fuel and craft this nostalgia

punk and goth subgenres of fashion emerged as well, but

in modern culture and media. Since it sells so well, the

big hair was amongst them all.

entertainment industry, fashion, and other aspects of American culture have picked up on this desire for

As the decade came to a close, this movement of ‘80s

nostalgia. These ‘80s influences hit celebrities and other

culture never left American life. The ‘90sstill held onto

prominent figures and they share fashion trends from

some of those iconic musicians and fashion trends. The

the decade and their own influences from years past.

turn of the century connected to the twenty years prior,

Suddenly, American culture of the 2010s is filled with

despite the rise of new technology and the emergence

references of past decades, specifically through nostalgia

of the internet. Today, the trends of the ‘80s are evident

older generations, and even younger generations that

as ever. According to Vanity Fair’s Kurt Anderson, the

never lived through it feel the craving.





The ‘90s Will Never Die Words by Jacqui Briddell Photos by Maya Coplin


or the young adults who were born on the cusp of two generations, many are just a few months shy of having

lost their ‘90s-baby privileges. Some may argue that a year and a half is plenty of time to be born and bred into the fads of the ending Millennials decade. Others, potentially those disgusted by the internet trends of tomorrow like TikTok or online dating, snobbily suggest anyone born after 1995 is strictly considered part of Gen Z. Regardless of who grew up with a videocassette recorder or the first iPhone, the 1990’s birthed trends that have been roaming the streets and claiming the identities of teenagers everywhere for nearly three decades now. Anything from scrunchies to skateboard culture or grunge, denim on denim, overalls, gold chains and tribal prints have been essentials to personal wardrobes, fashion lines and consumer culture. Fake flip phone filters on Instagram and the return of the disposable camera has left young people yearning for a decade that, for some, isn’t even theirs. Call it nostalgia or a trend or maybe even a little wistful jealousy of simpler times, the ‘90s will never die.











Style Section Collab // Photos by Tyler Lewis

The Playbook


as a song ever inspired you so much that you built an entire outfit around it? Or maybe you found a song that completely resonates

with your sense of style. We’ve created our playbook. The cross between a playlist & lookbook.

Roxanna // “Rhiannon” by Fleetwood Mac @_roxannasanchez

If there’s any girl I’d aspire to be it’s Rhiannon, with her seductive and domineering ways. Fleetwood Mac’s song about the legendary witch speaks of an elusive heartbreaking woman and her constant disappearing acts. I’d like to think a modern day Rhiannon would be a more subtle version of Stevie Nicks, but still very much a bohemian rocker type of girl. So for this outfit, I chose a black midi skirt paired with a Fleetwood Mac t-shirt, some white Go-Go ankle boots and a black leather jacket. I then topped off the look with a black vinyl purse. It’s very much a modern-day take on this type of woman who I’d like to think works at a hipster record shop, frequents many thrift shops and may even own her own Depop shop.

Lydia // “R.I.P.” by BbyMutha @wydialagner

I use clothing to exude my confidence, and I take solace in a good outfit. Afterall, the right look can mold your experience each day. That’s a practice of projecting confidence for your own internal good. In that way, BbyMutha is always unapologetic and bold — she communicates how she feels in these lyrics and vulnerability is powerful. In this outfit, I channel a condent, laidback energy. These oversized, grey-blue pants and sneakers paired with my favorite Goodwill find recently, a tank top that says ‘Bride’ in gemstones, means I’m broadcasting wholesome and self-assured vibes wherever I go.

Bailey // “Don’t Start Now” by Dua Lipa @baileyhcho

The best way to relieve all your stress from the week is to shake it off, literally. Whether I’m out on the town with friends or just in front of my mirror at home, dancing has always made me feel 100,000 times better after the “worst day of my entire life.” On my playlist, pop princess Dua Lipa sets the mood for every dance party, and her newest single “Don’t Start Now” is a Studio 54 fantasy. To match the song’s disco vibe, I paired a black turtleneck with my favorite crystal, wide-leg jeans from TopShop. I love how these pants sparkle under any light and add some movement to my outfit. A classic pair of AF1s and silver hoops complete the look, allowing me to dance the night away comfortably. ORANGE MAGAZINE

Hannah // “Die For You” by The Weeknd @hthornton024

On the day-to-day I try to dress as comfortably as possible while still making the effort to “dress to impress.” This song fits my ride-or-die persona to a T and makes me feel comfortable in my own skin and in my personality. Basically, yes, I’m a Cancer and this song and my comfort-driven style exude Cancer energy.

Maya // “Have a Good Day Sir” by the Garden @mayaemii

My obnoxiously tall platform boots push the pedal my car. They make me feel powerful and propell my road rage. My monochrome suit says “Play it safe.” My chained choker and oversized tee pull me away from trendiness and towards loudness and eccentricity. I’ve always been a maximalist. This track has an acquired taste and so do I.

Faith // “Bag Lady” by Erykah Badu @faithcastle21

I’ve always been the girl with the thick, heavy backpack. But that’s never enough, I keep a purse and wallet, too. Along with physical exhaustion, these bags create an indescribable soreness in my back at the end of each week. I didn’t realize less was more. The same goes for the spiritual bags I carry in my life. No one told me I didn’t have to carry all the emotions in my heart. Maybe I’ll let them go, or maybe I’ll continue to carry them around.

Cruz // “Aute Cuture” by ROSALÍA @cruzship

Rosalía is known for her extravagant nails, bold fashion choices and the use of flamenco-inspired movements in her choreography. In the song, she chants of stepping out, looking good and feeling like herself while people around her tell her to calm down. The song is empowering and meant for you to cheer yourself on without a care. As long as you’re looking good, you should be feeling good. I can’t help but think of a night when I planned to go dancing with my friend and she told me to dress lowkey. When she picked me up, I had on chains, huge Demonia boots and thrifted Off-White pants. She met me with, “Cruz… I thought I told you to keep it lowkey.” But, I’m a Taurus— stubborn and indulgent. I wore the outfit anyway and looked good as hell. DIMENSIONS





Astral Blackness: Afrofuturism in Music Words by Kennedy Williams Art by Sarang Kim


ince the latter half of the 19th century, Afrofuturistic

of sci-fi. It’s a lens through which some Black people

aesthetics have been visible in media. From the

approach the world. It’s a guide to how some understand

covers of Earth, Wind and Fire albums to Janelle Monáe’s

and navigate the earth. For some, Afrofuturism becomes a

archandroid, Afrofuturism has been a mythology and

lived philosophy.

philosophy that Black artists adopt in order to imagine and create new worlds.

Sun Ra, an experimental jazz musician and composer, is perhaps the most well-known Afrofuturist. He performed

As Afrofuturistic movies, music and fashion come into the

with an ensemble, aptly named “the Arkestra,” and

mainstream, the importance of marginalized people crafting

developed a unique persona as he grew his musical talents.

a unified Afrocentric future comes into question. Today’s

Sun Ra did away with his birth name, Herman Poole Blount,

tumultuous socio-political climate emerges as a catalyst for

and birthplace of Birmingham, Alabama and fashioned

Black people to imagine a future of freedom, empowerment

himself as an ethereal being meant to enlighten Black people

and beauty.

about their celestial connections.

Afrofuturism describes the intersection of Black imagination,

When the past is unknown, the future is created.

histories, freedoms, futures and technology. It’s a worldview through which Black people retrace the past and present in order to project a future in which freedom is not an afterthought. But the imagination of this future seeps into

In “Space Is The Place,” a 1972 film that combines sci-fi and

the present, impacting how Afrofuturists engage with the

elements of blaxploitation, Sun Ra explores his mythologies


and establishes music as a route to freedom.

Although artists have made Afrofuturistic art over time, the

In the film, Sun Ra lands his spaceship in Oakland in the

term “Afrofuturism” was first coined by critic Marc Dery in

midst of the Black Power Movement and is on a mission to

his 1993 essay “Black to the Future.” This work explored

enlighten Black youth about their particular place in society.

why there were so few Black science-fiction writers despite

Sun Ra is immediately teased and questioned about his

Black American’s innate connection to the “other.” Dery

clothing, which combines Egyptian Kemetic imagery and

writes that the lack of African-Americans in science-fiction

futuristic space boots, prompting a young girl to ask “How

writing “is especially perplexing in light of the fact that

do we know if you’re real?” Sun Ra, as if he’d been waiting

(they) are the descendants of alien abductees; they inhabit

for that question to be asked, quickly responds: “How do you

a sci-fi nightmare in which unseen, but no less impassable,

know I’m real? I’m not real, I’m just like you. You don’t exist

force fields of intolerance frustrate their movements; official

in this society. If you did, your people wouldn’t be seeking

histories undo what has been done; and technology is too

equal rights. You’re not real. If you were, you’d have some

often brought to bear on black bodies.” Dery presents

status among the nations of the world. So we’re both myths.

inherent ties between experiences of blackness in America

I do not come to you as a reality, I come to you as the myth.

and sci-fi’s focus on those at the margins.

Because that’s what Black people are: myths. I came from a dream that the Black man dreamed long ago. I’m actually

However, Afrofuturism does not only exist within the world

a present sent to you by your ancestors.” With this, Sun Ra



Afrofuturists’ merging of the past, present and future through ancestral veneration allows time to become fluid.

not only reveals his specific mission, but unearths a pillar of

except linear. It becomes a spiraling connection that links

Afrofuturism: the incorporation of past, present, and future.

Black people of the diaspora to their contemporaries and their ancestors, suggesting that they are simultaneously

“Afrofuturism is about carving out an imaginary space where

living in a present that was dreamt of by their foremothers

Black people have a livable future,” said Omise’eke Tinsley,

and forefathers, crafting their own futures.

associate professor in the African and African Diaspora Studies Department at The University of Texas at Austin.

It’s within this cultural context that the work of modern

“This is counter to what we’re given in popular narratives in

Afrofuturists resides. One of the most visible artists carrying

the media. One of the particularities of Afrofuturism, to me,

on the Afrofuturist tradition is Janelle Monáe. With her

is it’s a future that includes the present and the past.”

articulation of the archandroid, Monáe brought Afrofuturist mythologies to the forefront.

This combining of the past and present in order to assert a future is essential to understanding Afrofuturism. For

On her 2007 mainstream debut “Metropolis,” Monáe

African-Americans, history exists a space of generational

introduced listeners to one of her alter egos, “Cindi

trauma. By honoring the beauty of the past, however,

Mayweather,” an android that faces punishment for falling in

Afrofuturism honors the endurance of the Black souls that

love with a human. Over the course of her next two albums

transcended bondage. When the past is unknown, the future

“The Archandroid” and “Electric Lady,” Monáe unfolded

is created.

Mayweather’s story, positioning her as a figure that is simultaneously being hunted and tasked with reconciling

Afrofuturists’ merging of the past, present and future through

the tumultuous relationship between humans and androids.

ancestral veneration allows time to become fluid. According

Although Monáe’s world can be confusing and her messages

to Tinsley, honoring one’s ancestors is ingrained in Black

are shrouded in slick metaphors, at the core she is telling

American culture.

the story of the “other.” Just as Monáe’s Archandroid is being stalked and mistreated, the “others” in society are in

“People have photos of their ancestors or their great

a perpetual state of anxiety and terror. The metallic armor

grandparents and keep those things that are passed down

of the android is nothing more than a shield that protects

because they are scarce and they are sacred,” Tinsley said.

against the horrors of society and helps preserve one’s true

“What is at work there is thinking about the ancestors as if


they are on our shoulders and paying homage to them by transforming the world we live in.”

With her work, Monáe extends Sun Ra’s belief that music is a tool that allows borders and identities to be transcended

In Afrofuturism, the honoring of ancestors and ancestral

and freedom to be reached. In “Space Is The Place,” Sun Ra

cultures is most visible in it’s aesthetics. But traditional

reveals his desire to create a free planet for black people

aesthetics are often elevated and merged with futuristic

who must use music to teleport to their new home. On

sensibilities. Ruth E. Carter’s costume design in “Black

“Django Jane,” a single from her forthcoming album “Dirty

Panther” speaks to this as it incorporates both ancient cultural

Computer,” Monáe raps “Black girl magic y’all can’t stand it,

and ethnic symbols with space-age elements. The pivoting

y’all can’t ban it made out like a bandit / They been trying

between past, present and future that Afrofuturism employs

hard just to make us all vanish, I suggest they put a flag on a

makes it both visionary and reflective. Time is everything

whole ‘nother planet.” Monáe is in direct conversation with



The pivoting between past, present and future that Afrofuturism employs makes it both visionary and reflective. Sun Ra, extending his ideas.

“This idea that we are celestial beings is an africanist idea and a Kongo-based idea that becomes evident in

For Afrofuturists, music is a tool for liberation as it helps to

Afrofuturistic thought and works” said Tinsley. The notion

remove the spirit from oppressive boundaries.

that Black people are celestial beings emphasizes the Afrofuturist concept of reclaiming a buried history and

Historically, this can be seen in the genre of slave songs in

asserting a boundless future. If Black people have an innate

which enslaved Africans used music to call for freedom.

celestial connection and belong in the stars spiritually, then

Centuries later, Black musicians are still using music to

blackness becomes infinite, forever escaping the restraints

advocate for personal freedom, allowing their experiences

of worldly oppression.

with blackness to influence their subject matter. The tenets of Afrofuturism aren’t anything new. Afrofuturists Jessica Bathea, musician and alumna of UT Austin, shared

have been vocalizing their beliefs and creating their own

how her experiences as a Black woman impact her music

worlds for centuries. But the recent wave of Afrofuturist

and influences her resistance of oppressive systems.

art is not happening by coincidence. Like many artistic movements, the re-emergence of Afrofuturism is spurred by

“Institutional worship of whiteness was so prevalent in some

socio-cultural occurrences.

of my experiences,” Bathea said. “The only way that I was going to confront that oppression was through music.”

Tinsley reminisced on a conversation with a historian colleague, who was seeking guidance on what to call this age

For Bathea, music is not only a way to achieve freedom,

we’re living in. The two determined the best label was “the

but also a tool to connect with the divine. “This world, this

age of Black death.”

musical world, I see it as a direct link to creation and the source,” Bathea said. “I believe that the source lies in me.

“Whether or not there is more Black death than there (was)

I think our decisions and the way that we build and grow is

in the ‘90s, Black death today is more televised,” Tinsley

informed by our ancestors and forces that, if we engage with

said. “Perhaps the killings are more bold, with police killings

them openly, can guide us.”

of unarmed Black people without repercussions.”

Many Afrofuturists look to the stars for guidance and refuge.

“Under these conditions, it becomes absolutely crucial that we imagine a future,” Tinsley said. “It is particularly

“The cosmos is maybe our only home,” Tinsley said.

important in popular media that we have spaces where we

“Anywhere you go on earth is a space of Black oppression,

can imagine our survival. By creating that imaginary space

including nations in Africa, and a space of Black death. The

we can create real livable futures.”

cosmos is a way of literally imagining another world we can reside in.”

The current iteration of Afrofuturism speaks to the need to create safe Black spaces and Black futures—the kind of

Viewing the cosmos as a home for Black people is not new.

Black futures that aren’t just livable, but worth living.

While discussing the magic of Black people might be more visible today, viewing the universe as a spiritual home is centuries old.



Albums of the Decade Music Section Collab


he 2010s have been a whirlwind. The decade began with the internet cementing its grip on our lives, from daily documentation on social media to the music industry’s depen-

dence on Youtube views and Spotify streams. It’s ending with the hellscape of our current political climate. As our world seemed to reinvent itself, our favorite artists evolved with it. Protest music entered the mainstream once more and almost every artistic statement was accompanied with visuals. We’re not Pitchfork, so we won’t be ranking the best albums of the decade, but the music section came together to share our personal favorites.

In every music lover’s life, there comes an album at the right moment to fully resonate with their soul. The summer of 2017 was that transition period for me. Finishing off my first year of college, I was planning to waste away my last true summer of mindless freedom by working as a lifeguard at my miniscule, hometown pool. In only three months, I was going to be moving beyond the realm Words by: Savannah Olson Lorde “Melodrama” (2017)

of teenhood into the choppy waters of my twenties as I made the decision to uproot life at one college for a new one the next fall. Enter, “Melodrama”. From the first listen of the album, Lorde’s raspy voice gripped my heart. I may not have been running around the crowded streets of New York City, attending glamorous parties with celebs, yet all her fears and anxieties felt like my own. The people I looked up to were now looking less than shiny behind their glass mirage. Worries about my future path continued to


pile up and life was chaotic, but fun. Lorde seems unafraid and bubbling with self-doubt every step of the album. I’ve screamed whole songs out car windows with friends on endless, late nights and stayed up in bed with only Lorde’s frantic whispers seeping into my ears as a sign that feelings of growing up aren’t unique but universally felt by even the biggest indie-pop stars. “Perfect Places” is the centerpiece of an album that etches out the elder Generation Z’s stumble into our twenties. Closing “Melodrama” on the question, “What the fuck are perfect places, anyway?” Lorde’s distinct rasp is paired with a stripped down piano, replacing the running ‘80s synth that drove the entirety of the tune. It’s a stark perspective that takes every young person their own time to figure out but Lorde pushes away the excess noise to give us a head start.


Every accredited artist goes through some

aware of anyone like me. With lyrics such



as, “Let these Black kids be who they are //

mentally. It shows a sense of growth from

Dye your hair blue, I’ll do it too” on “Where

the artist and, as a result, their fans grow

This Flower Blooms,” I found solace and

with them. On Tyler, the Creator’s fourth

catharsis. It taught me that I should not be

studio album “Flower Boy,” the rapper lets

ashamed of the way I am, but instead, cele-

go of his trolling days from his OFWGKTA

brate it. Like Tyler, I burst out of my cocoon.

era and decides to take things to a more

Other songs such as “Garden Shed” and “I

personal level. Strategically released in

Ain’t Got Time” further reveals a new, yet

Words by: Miles Eackles

the middle of summer, the album sonical-

authentic side of Tyler that fans have never

Tyler, the Creator

ly runs through a field of sunflowers. The

seen before. Being his most cohesive album

album cover is a pictorial representation.

at the time, “Flower Boy” positioned the

This album is personal to me because it was

rapper as someone who hones in and per-

released during such an integral time in my

fects his craft. I’ve personally learned and

life. I was ashamed of my sexuality due to

have grown so much as a result from this

constricting confines of my hometown. Pri-

album; it encouraged me to be who I truly

or to the release of “Flower Boy,” I wasn’t

wanted to be.

“Flower Boy” (2017)



When Hayley Williams stepped out of a

jams. Disco beats, arpeggiated guitar lines

wrecked car and smoothed her fresh-

and marimba tones soundtrack Williams’

ly-bleached hair (rest in peace to the bright

devastating but relatable tales of anxiety and

orange of 2007) in the music video for

burnout. “I’m so annoyed / Cause I just killed

“Hard Times,” Paramore’s first single from

off what was left of the optimist in me,” she

their album “After Laughter,” I got the feel-

announces in “Rose Colored Boy,” but the

ing that the band had gone through a trans-

“low-key, no pressure” chant that precedes it

formation. The emo survivors had once

is such an exciting musical departure that the

been my favorite band but the pretension

track becomes a singalong, not a bummer. In

Words by: Carys Anderson

of high school made me abandon their pop-

“Idle Worship,” Williams begs to be seen as a

punk style. I was indie and refined now. But

flawed human being, rather than a role model,

Paramore “After Laughter” (2017)

in that video, resembling Debbie Harry and

but personally, the shout-singing and the in-

yelping “I gotta get to rock bottom,” Wil-

finitely catchy chorus of “la’s” reeled me into

liams showed me we were going through

dedicated fandom all over again. Paramore’s

our new-wave phases at the same time, and

openness, thematically and melodically, re-

maybe even both struggling. ith that, in the

turned me to my first musical love and tipped

final weeks of my senior year, Paramore

me off to not headbanging out my angst, but

re-entered my life. “After Laughter” proved

dancing it all away.

to be a generous offering of depression


Billowy, harmonic somberness takes prece-

as great staccato of bass and saxophone. In

dent in the mountain man’s second album.

“Holocene,” saxophonist Colin Stetson takes

It still retains the dreamy, mournful, rumi-

lead with another brilliant instrumental cre-

native qualities that made its predecessor,

scendo. Crooning “Love can hardly leave the

“For Emma, Forever Ago” (2008), so com-

room/With you heart” in “Michicant,” Vernon

pelling, but now it’s slicker, a little stranger

recants his loss of innocence. While some

and more upbeat. The resplendent opener,

fans might miss the log cabin aesthetic, this

“Perth,” resembles singer Justin Vernon’s

time, Vernon is writing love songs to a series

post-rock ensemble Volcano Choir, boast-

of places, some real (“Lisbon, OH”, “Wash”),

Words by: Ashley Hackett

ing heavily strummed guitars and a dou-

some imagined (“Hinnim, TX”). The band’s

ble kick-drum. From there, “Minnesota,

focus may have widened but the eerie siren

Bon Iver “Bon Iver” (2011)

WI” boasts African-derived guitars, as well

song is just as alluring.


Jersey’s own Solána Imani Rowe, perform-

had never been used by a woman artist in

ing under the name SZA, put out the best

a way that demands so much respect and

R&B album of the decade with “Ctrl.” So

reverence. As a Scorpio, Rowe carries an

powerfully emotive, raw and all her own,

unmatched emotionality, sensuality and

Rowe brings us into her heart and mind. Ev-

beauty in thought that ends up stinging you.

ery song has something new to offer, chan-

You feel for her and alongside her. “Ctrl” is

neling the experience of a young Black wom-

for the late-nights, long drives, and intense

an growing up, and in and out of love. “The

crying sessions. It’s seeing your ex move

Weekend” brought women’s empowerment

onto someone new. It’s looking yourself in

Words by: Savannah Olson

in hookups to the forefront, paralleled with

the mirror many, many times and seeing


tracks such as “Garden (Say It Like That)”,

something that wants to love, but not feeling

and “Supermodel” that question her wor-

worthy. It’s also, hopefully, something you

thiness of deep love. Her voice is one of

grow past. I may not relate to this album at

the most unique to come out of the 2010s,

30, but the trials of the 20-somethings never

weaving in and out of trap beats. For me,

change, and “Ctrl” will endure for any young

until “Doves In The Wind,” the word “pussy”

soul in need of a shoulder to cry on.

“Ctrl” (2017)

Words by: Violet Glenewinkel Phoebe Bridgers, “Stranger In the Alps” (2017)

There’s something about the dreary, some-

work. The way she puts the struggle of loneli-

times disturbing, but always very beautiful

ness, grief and heartache out into the world is

lyricism Phoebe Bridgers has a reputation

through her dreary music. This album may not

for. Seriously, I recommend this album to

be fitting for a party playlist, but you can go

anyone with the patience to listen. I’ve got

to it for comfort during one of your worst mo-

the Spotify link to “Stranger” in all of my so-

ments (not that I haven’t tried to put it on at a

cial media bios. I advertise it. I write about it.

kickback before). But, when you think about

I live my days with this album playing in the

it, that’s the kind of music that sticks with you.

background, diegetically or in my head. De-

It’s a tight hug from a good friend, a breath of

spite her lyrics being so emotionally raw, the

empathy. Bridgers’ poetry has helped heal my

album itself is good because it’s by Bridgers.

broken heart and my wounds. This album will

She’s got an energy about her that’s full of

heal yours, too.

life, humor and heart; the opposite of her


94 97








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