To a New Dawn: Letters of Solidarity Anthology

ELSPETH WHITE, 15 Dear whoever wants to read, Is it just me, or does lockdown have a smell? For me it’s the smell of a very specific soap or the smell of paninis cooking on the Foreman grill (a welcome change from school lunches). I know it’s cheesy, but it’s really true: when I use that soap or eat that panini, I swear I am transported back just for a minute.

The thing is – and I feel guilty every time I confess this – I feel nostalgic for lockdown. I know it was terrible in some ways, and I know we’re not really out of it yet, but, if I’m honest, lockdown kind of showed me how I want to live!

Wow that sounds depressing: being isolated and unable to even go to restaurants, but there are so many things I wouldn’t change. Online school, for example, has taught me self-study suits me! Apparently I thrive off silence (or the gentle hum of traffic from the dual carriageway) and independence. Also, as sad as this sounds, I think I thrive off only seeing a select few people (on Zoom calls, etc) a couple of times a week. I am definitely exposing my introversion here.

Perhaps time has slightly warped my positivity about isolation here. In the first couple of weeks in September, seeing friends and teachers was invigorating and genuinely helpful. It’s still great now; it’s just sometimes I crave my desk: my escape.

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