CJ, 17

Life in Lockdown: What Was It Like?

Life in lockdown was extremely stressful for me. I was constantly worrying about the near future: what will happen to others, and how will we recover from this. I have had medical appointments cancelled due to this deadly virus. Appointments that could have helped me and change my life. As a 17-year-old I shouldn’t be worrying about the internal problems I have. With the support I receive I should be feeling relaxed, right? Instead I’m always on edge about what’s going to happen next. Will I get my issues fxed? Do I have to wait another year? Te stress was just constantly building up, weighing me down. Crying for most nights not knowing what to do. Te lockdown felt like a lifetime not being able to see friends and family members. Being isolated from the world made me feel depressed, outcast, forgotten. However, the lockdown did help bring my family and me a lot closer. We managed to bond, relate to each other and express ourselves. Despite the inner isolated feeling I had, I felt so happy being surrounded by my loving family. I felt gleeful, loved, and cared for. Tey supported me when I was feeling like I was low all the time. Te hardest part of lockdown was the breakup with my boyfriend of eight months. Not being able to see my friends, I felt so broken. I wasn’t able to do my regular

activities. I couldn’t eat, sleep or even drink. I didn’t want to leave my bed. I stopped playing video games, I isolated myself even more. It was hard to talk to people. I didn’t want to touch my phone, my laptop, nothing. I didn’t want to have contact with absolutely anyone. I wanted to be alone…

But it didn’t take me long to spark back to my usual self. Afer the messages and support I received, I started to smile again. Regardless of how hard life can get, there will always be people behind you to support you. I came back to my social media, messaging people and even making new friends to play video games with. It helped me out so much! I started to regulate my diet, maintain my weight and just become a better person than I was before. For once I actually felt happy being who I am. Now I get people saying how I inspire them to become a better person, starting with getting rid of toxic people that have been weighing them down.

Even though I was feeling happier, there were more obstacles coming my way. Constant fush of emotions, anxiety, depression. All these emotions and expressions I hid away from others. I kept them to myself. It was extremely painful not wanting to tell people because I was scared I’d bother them. I always put a brave face on like nothing was happening. I slowly started to express myself by opening up to my family and friends. No matter

who you are we all have our struggles and issues. Smiling through the pain doesn’t work and you should defnitely express yourself. Don’t worry about bothering people – they’re there for you for a reason! I made so many new and amazing friends during this lockdown. It’s defnitely a memorable memory. An odd memory I must say. 2020 may be a terrible year but I think we all have something to take from it. Care for those around you, look afer yourself and be grateful for what you have because you’ll never know when it will be the last time you’ll see it.