TY HEALY

Dear Optimism, Initially, I thought to write this letter in Braille, because for as long as I can remember you have always been blind. However, this has never seemed to be a disability because I’ve never known another so wide-eyed. I miss that… I miss you. You used to live at the forefront of my thoughts: always redecorating my mind with bright colours, approaching new challenges with no fear, taking pieces from these lived experiences and placing them like furniture, to create the perfect feng shui. I’m still a person seeking balance but I think I need your help again. I wrote a little poem for you:

Tis current form of me is a shell of a former me

Pessimistic wondering through the mystic fog

Trying to hear the sound of a tree falling in the woods

All the while knowing that no one is around to cut it down

Was that my optimism refusing to social distance?

It’s close, it’s about two metres

Just not close enough for me to feel it. I know this is not my best work, but I hope you get the point. I need that blind optimism back because, with age, concern also grows. Grey hairs sprout from the mind’s

grey walls, remember? You haven’t been around to paint with the bright colours. Sorry, I have this tendency to use metaphors to dance around the topic at hand. In reality, I’m not sure what to make of it.

We had to plan my aunt’s funeral with the current laws in place, no more than six people present at the burial they said. We had at least 20 people there who felt like immediate family and, believe me, we could have washed our hands with the tears.

Optimism, maybe you haven’t been around because your energy was transferred to my aunt. Te strength that Claire Moran-Healy displayed through her fght was both inspiring and enlightening. Never scared, she was only sad if she saw that we were: that’s the kind of person she was. Our family let yellow balloons foat to the sky in her memory, I can only hope that the optimism she had for us to stay strong and keep supporting each other will eventually fall out of the sky and land back into my mind. Tat thought alone warms my heart, and that’s a start. I am optimistic enough to believe you will read this letter, so deep down I think you’re already with me… You always have been, as she is. As I look in the garden and see the yellow balloon tied to the gate, I smile. See you around. Forever Grateful,

Ty Healy