issue 14

Page 22

“Labour’s policies involving students and education (words from the Old Tongue which roughly translate to ‘socio-economic burden’ and ‘necessary evil’ respectively).“

none so far have dared to try. His attack patterns are difficult to predict, any many inexperienced attackers have focused on what they perceived as weak spot in his famed Mithril Oratory Armour, only to discover that, for example, Mr. Peters in fact said no such thing. Impact on waiKato is difficult to predict, as per usual. The clan’s anti-immigration stance could mean less international students walking our fair dungeons, which could lead to less funding for the server. Of course, this might just mean that less things are arbitrarily built/demolished in a given year which can be a bonus. Or perhaps it will be as if an anti-immigration stance never existed, if people stop liking it. The party tends to be anti-corporate, but also quite conservative with social policy. In a general sense this means that business and enterprise would be more regulated and taxed, while the adventuring populous would find themselves with a little more freedom and a little less support than say, the Labour Clan would provide. Overall the clan markets itself as standing for ordinary New Zealanders, but whether you should believe this is mostly a personal thing, and probably comes down to your impression of the man known as the Kingmaker.

Green The Green clan, as evidenced by their name, wave the banner of the token hippies. The clan builds its numbers from Arts and Social Science majors, as well as other peripheral novelty classes like Marine Biologists and the allegedly greatest public menace of them all: The Green Mage. You know, status affects and all that kind of stuff. Currently they are helmed by Jeanette Fitzsimmons and Russell Norman, whose leadership roles are akin to the co-ordinators of an arts and crafts fair. The clan essentially crusade for a world where it’s always sunny and rainbows still exist somehow and everyone just goes around healing each other. Items and gold should just appear for everyone and certainly no pets or summons should be used in combat. They have rights and self awareness too, apparently. The clan itself has no practical policy as such, rather it hopes to influence the way other policies are implemented in order to keep Gaia happy. The Green Clan are therefore based in a 22

group of small tents around a giant crystal that hums sometimes. In a (non-genetically modified) nutshell, the popularity of the Greens is a reflection of how much ideology the adventuring population wants to inject/is willing to allow into the way the server is run. The Greens have a historical connection to waiKato, as former member and poster-boy cannabis gunslinger Nándor Tánczos was once editor of local liberoanarchist commu-nazi robo-feminist magazine Nexus.

Maori There is no possible way to make a single nerd joke about a Maori clan without someone calling me a racist, and I’ve had a long week.

United Future Getting into the small time now, the United Future clan is made up entirely of Priest and Paladin classes, and specialises in White and Holy Magic, as well as advanced Summons and Miracle Tech. Made from the fusion of the United and Future (formerly Christian Democrat) clans, they exist as a result of trying to get all the people who worship Jesus together, stop arguing about how to worship Jesus for five minutes, and battle evil in all its political forms. Often gains allies in other smaller parties that only really care about one thing, so expect to encounter various members from all crawls of life such as the Outdoor Recreation New Zealand, WIN (anti smoking), and Toilet Paper So It Hangs Over The Roll Thanks clans. Haven’t made much progress since they are constantly internally squabbling over who is too assertively fundamental or not evangelistic enough. Recent rebranding of the party has removed the Christian element, leaving the clan approximately nothing to identify with except for being made up of old men that probably smell like baby powder.

Family The Family Clan is made up of members from the now defunct Destiny New Zealand, and a guy from United Future. The clan describes itself as “pro-family, traditional Christian” and says that it will target Maori


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