Beth has an active lifestyle, but when knee pain prevented her from running, playing tennis and practicing yoga, she turned to UW Health Orthopedics and Rehabilitation.
After a partial knee replacement, Beth is back in action and pain free.
We helped Beth— imagine what we can do for you.
Our areas of expertise include:
Joint Replacement
Spine
Sports Medicine
Orthopedic Oncology
Trauma
Pediatric Orthopedics
Rehabilitation Services
Foot and Ankle
Hand, Elbow and Shoulder
To learn what it’s like to have a knee replacement, watch Beth’s story at uwhealth.org/moveagain
For more information, visit uwhealth.org/ortho or call (608) 263-7540.
From Burnout to Balance:
Thursday, April 27, 6:15-7:30 pm with Rachel Wilberding
Life today comes with a LOT of expectations and pressures – there’s no doubt about that. It’s easy to feel overextended and underappreciated, and it can burn you out, steal your joy, and make you feel like you’re just barely surviving each day. But with the right tools, an understanding of your body’s patterns and responses, and some simple daily habits you can beat back the burnout, reclaim your joy, and move from surviving to thriving!
“Your best life starts with a dream.” WITH RACHEL WILBERDING
“With no structural changes to the room or painting, the designer transformed my room with no personality into a room that people say “WOW” when they enter it.”
Pat S. from Caledonia, WI
www.steinhafels.com/decorating-solutions
BRAVAmagazine.com/event/200stateBNO
CONNECT
Engage | 15
The latest news, hot events, discussions and special BRAVA promotions you can’t live without.
In Their Shoes | 18
Infamous Mothers: Sagashus Levingston’s revealing book and movement
THRIVE
Wedding Bliss | 27
Explore our bridal look book’s three luscious themes.
Wellbeing | 35
Pet therapy, the art of saying no
Dwell | 38
Repurpose your porch, textural outdoor decor
Shop Talk | 44
Defy gravity at Boulders Climbing Gym.
GO+DO
Toast of the Town | 71
Join us for BRAVA’s Power Happy Hour.
Eats + Drinks | 72
Madison’s happy hour gems
Spotlight | 77
April’s don’t-miss arts and entertainment events
Catalyst | 82
REAP Food Group connects farmers and consumers.
Happenings | 83
See who you know in photos from the Go Red for Women Lighting Ceremony and BRAVA’s 2017 Madison Kids Expo.
IN EVERY ISSUE
Relate | 10
Contributors | 12 Linger | 84
SPECIAL ADVERTISING SECTIONS
Bridal Guide | 31
Lawn and Garden Guide | 42
Sponsored Content: Conversations with Aging Parents | 63
Automotive Sales & Service Professional Profiles | 74
BRAVA Kids | 78
Colossal Piano
APRIL 7, 8, 9 |
Overture Hall
The incomparable Philippe Bianconi masters Rachmaninoff’s legendary concerto, known as the most fearsomely difficult piece ever written for piano, and the composer’s favorite among his own works.
ROBERT SCHUMANN
Manfred Overture
WITOLD LUTOSŁAWSKI
Concerto for Orchestra
SERGEI RACHMANINOFF
Piano Concerto No. 3
John DeMain, Conductor
Philippe Bianconi, Piano
EXCLUSIVE SPONSOR
Pleasant T. Rowland Foundation
MADISONSYMPHONY.ORG , the Overture Center Box Office, or (608) 258-4141.
Brahms’ Requiem
MAY
5, 6,
7 | Overture Hall
CHARLES STANFORD
Concert Piece for Organ and Orchestra
JOHANNES BRAHMS A German Requiem
John DeMain, Conductor
Beverly Taylor, Chorus Director
Nathan Laube, Organ
Devon Guthrie, Soprano
Timothy Jones, Bass-Baritone
Madison Symphony Chorus
MAJOR FUNDING PROVIDED BY
Kenneth A. Lattman Foundation, Inc.
Larry and Jan Phelps
University Research Park
BMO Wealth Management
ADDITIONAL FUNDING PROVIDED BY WPS Health Solutions
Carla and Fernando Alvarado
Wisconsin Arts Board
Brahms’ profound and comforting meditation—one of the finest choral works of Western music—is complemented by the U.S. premiere of a fascinating work by Irish composer Stanford.
BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT JENNIFER ROSEN-HEINZ jennifer@bravaenterprises.com
BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT JODY WISZ jody@ntmediagroup.com
INTERNS Editorial | Helen Bush
BRAVA Magazine is a publication of Nei-Turner Media Group, Inc. Gary E. Nei, Chairman; William Turner, President; Barbara Krause, Publisher. 951 Kimball Lane, Suite 104, Verona, WI, (608) 848-6700.
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Photo by Greg Anderson
HAVE YOU HAD THE CONVERSATION?
ASK JANET BOLLIG, MSSW
Q
What is the “conversation”?
The “conversation” is an ongoing dialog you have with your loved ones where you talk about the future and share information. It is a conversation everyone should be having with their parents, their spouse, their children. This type of conversation isn’t a one-time discussion. You need to revisit topics over the course of days, months, or even years. Not only does spreading out these talks make the whole process less daunting, it allows for change.
Q
What should we be talking about?
Everything. This is why it’s not a one-time conversation. There is a lot of ground to cover. Start by talking about concerns, thoughts about the future, and preferences.
know where to find their usernames and passwords if needed?
Q
Why is this type of conversation so important?
Just because you don’t talk about something doesn’t mean it isn’t there. People get older, accidents happen, illnesses happen, people die. Having everyone on the same page makes it much easier to handle a crisis. If no one knows what to do, or where to find vital information in an emergency, it makes an already stressful situation that much worse.
Look at it this way. Do you plan for retirement? Of course, because proper retirement planning allows you to maintain your quality of life. Now, have you put the same amount of thought and planning into what would happen if you were ever seriously ill or injured? You should, because that affects your quality of life as well.
QAny suggestions on how to broach the topic?
It really depends on the personalities involved, but generally the best way to begin is to plant seeds. For instance, have you had the conversation with your loved ones? Age doesn’t matter. These are important things to discuss whether you are 19 or 90. Use your own planning as a springboard.
“Mom, I’ve been thinking a lot about the future, and I just wanted to let you know some things I have decided. What would you want if something were to happen and you couldn’t speak for yourself?” Or, “My husband and I were going through our financial paperwork, and I just wanted you to know where to find it in case you would ever need it. Where do you and Mom keep all of that information?”
It is all about the approach. Don’t make demands, don’t judge choices. Start by asking about general worries or concerns. Then segue into more specific questions depending on the answers.
Q
Any recommendations on how to move forward if we meet resistance?
Reassure your parents you are not looking to take anything away from them. You just want to have guidance and a plan in the event you need one. Frame it as a family plan for the future. A plan that will make things easier for everyone.
Home Health United 4639 Hammersley Rd. Madison, WI 53711 800-924-2273 HomeHealthUnited.org
In the event your mom or dad was incapacitated, would you know what their wishes are? Discuss completing an advance directive. It’s a document that lets others know what you would or would not want in regard to your healthcare if you could not speak for yourself.
You don’t have to discuss specifics right away, but if something were to happen tomorrow would you know where to find a list of your parents’ medications or contact information for their physician? Would you know where to find important documents like insurance policies, wills, funeral plans, and banking or investment information? Do your parents pay their bills online or have online accounts? Would you
It might be helpful to suggest using a professional for certain aspects of the conversation. Consider scheduling an appointment with a lawyer, estate planner, financial advisor, or care management professional.
Janet Bollig, MSSW, is a Medical Social Worker with Home Health United who has been helping patients and families navigate their health care journeys for over 25 years. Home Health United is a nonprofit agency providing home health, palliative care, hospice, home medical equipment, infusion pharmacy and community health services. Request an informational visit by calling (800) 924-2273 or visit HomeHealthUnited.org.
LIFE GETS SO FRENETIC
that it’s hard to slow down and find time to even consider the pace, and whether its allowing us to be our best selves. When we can steal some contemplative moments, it’s worth thinking about what holds us back and what it would take to feel as if we’re truly thriving in our lives, and not just surviving to get to the next race.
Maybe it’s simply about carving out— prioritizing—more time for quiet, personal interests or working on projects and pursuits that grow joy, confidence and fulfillment. Perhaps it requires breaking out of numbing routines to delve into something you’ve never tried before. Tweaking your job might bring you renewed passion for your work, or perhaps the need is bigger—changing jobs, or even changing careers altogether.
Change can feel daunting, but as we learn from our experts in this issue, it starts by doing—taking action and at the same time pushing fear of the unknown aside. It begins with an assessment of our values, understanding what matters most to us. Knowing that helps us get into our “zone,” that space of greatest engagement and enjoyment.
“A Career Reimagined,” by Shelby Deering, P. 54, shares advice for arriving there in your work life. For the story, Deering spoke with local life coaches, career counselors and other experts— namely, women who’ve taken the leap and retooled their careers and came out happily blooming on the other side.
And even if the other side doesn’t offer quite what you’d expected, psychologist Shilagh Mirgain, in, “Cultivating Resilience,” P. 60, talks about how important it is to bounce back from life’s challenges. The ability to do so, Mirgain tells us, helps us protect our confidence, embrace our feelings and keep moving forward by recasting failures and challenges as valuable growth opportunities.
ON THE COVER
Weddings today are so inspired. Styled and photographed by Hillary Schave. Get more fresh ideas on P. 27.
Three other stories tell us that boundaries are something to surmount, but that boundaries of our own intentional design can be powerful tools for eliminating distraction from our goals.
These, and many other stories in this issue, support BRAVA’s important mission: to help women thrive in all aspects of life. To help you get there, we have crafted the BRAVA THRIVE Conference—a full day’s immersion in the idea of truly blossoming.
The conference offers unique opportunities—and the space—to think in both big and small pictures about life. Four categories of workshops—empower, enrich, educate and entrepreneur—span personal and professional topics, and extras throughout the day infuse fun and additional, actionable takeaways that you can put into practice immediately in your life.
Here’s a sampler: Forget about work/ life balance—finding ‘flow’ is the new thing toward cultivating happiness. Get focused on goals with laser life and business coaching. Finally launch that business idea with the advice you need to map out a financial plan. Improve your communication skills, learn to seek calm through meditation, spark your creativity, harness your authenticity, create inspiring workplaces—and design the life you want to live.
You’ll be surrounded by like-minded women and powerful resources from the Madison community. That is fertile ground for your ideas and spirit to blossom. Turn to page 45 for THRIVE Conference details. Register now, and join us April 28. Then prepare to bloom, in all aspects of your life.
Kate Bast Editor-in-Chief
REGISTER NOW!
To register now for the BRAVA THRIVE Conference, visit thrivewithbrava.com
GET READY TO BLOOM
Warm weather is right around the corner
Comprehensive Vein Care
If you have varicose veins or spider veins, explore your options for treatment at UW Health. Our comprehensive vein center offers minimally invasive procedures for your bothersome, painful veins.
Look and Feel Your Best
Call (608) 287-2210 to schedule an appointment at our vein center located at 1 S. Park Street in Madison. Or, visit uwhealth.org/lovemylegs to request a consultation online, learn about treatment options and see our other locations.
OTHER CONTRIBUTORS
WRITERS | Amy Carlson, Ann Garvin
PHOTOGRAPHERS | Kaia Calhoun, Lisa Wilcox
SHELBY DEERING | “A CAREER REIMAGINED,” P. 54
Shelby is a Verona-based lifestyle writer and the owner of writing business Shelby Deering, LLC.
She loves to create highly descriptive, authentic, soulful pieces for national publications like Midwest Living, Flea Market Decor and Vintage Celebrations and for regional magazines such as Wisconsin People & Ideas and Experience Wisconsin. With a focus on profiles, home decor, shopping and travel, Shelby enjoys experiencing all that Madison has to offer, with her husband and her corgi Ginger, at her side.
SAGASHUS LEVINGSTON | “IN THEIR OWN WORDS,” P. 18
Sagashus is a doctoral candidate in English at UWMadison and her forthcoming coffee table book “Infamous Mothers” is inspired by her dissertation. She also is a proud button-wearing member of the Doyenne Group, Inc., and sits on the Wisconsin Women’s Business Initiative Corporation’s South Central Ambassadorial Advisory Committee. She’s a 2017 BRAVA Woman to Watch and a UW-Madison Outstanding Woman of Color. As the proud mother of six children—three boys and three girls—and partner of Tosumba, she and her family reside in Madison.
SHILAGH MIRGAIN | “CULTIVATING RESILIENCE,” P. 60
Shilagh is a health and sport psychologist at UW Health. A sought-after speaker, writer, facilitator and therapist, Shilagh is a frequent contributor to WMTV News and BRAVA Magazine in Madison, and has been featured nationally on the TODAY show. Shilagh writes, speaks and trains on mindfulness meditation and mind-body skills to foster optimal health, happiness and wellbeing. She also is a sport psychologist to UW Badger student athletes.
HILLARY SCHAVE | PHOTOS THROUGHOUT
Hillary is the creative force behind the local business Azena Photography. Her vast experience in documentary and editorial style wedding photography has helped to create some truly genuine and beautiful portraits of the local women featured in BRAVA Magazine. She is “mama” and wife to two amazing fellas and loves that it only takes 20 minutes to get almost anywhere in Madison.
SHANNA WOLF | PHOTOS THROUGHOUT
Shanna is a freelance photographer with a background in advertising and communications, specializing in portrait, documentary and interior photography. Her photography aesthetic is modern with simplicity and balance. She loves the storytelling of still photography and being a contributor to publications with meaningful messages. Her personal work is focused on travel and wandering, using her camera as her sketchbook.
MONEY SMARTS
I’ve been trying to stick to a budget, but it is really hard. There are so many deals. Any ideas?
It can be really hard to stick to a budget, especially given the way we are all marketed to. It is easy to fall into a retailer’s claim: “You saved $95.36 today!” While that might make you feel good when you see it in print or when the associate says it, it really is just a way to get your mind off what you did spend. Rather than leaving you with the thought that you just charged $305.99 on your credit card to save that $95.36, you think, “Wow, I really got a good deal. I’m a smart shopper.”
You may, indeed, be a smart shopper, but only if those items on your list were items you really needed and planned on buying. Also, be aware that the cash rewards offered to use on your next purchase are just another invitation to spend more than you planned.
Over the holidays, one of the approaches that got me was relentless emails from stores I had already shopped at with even more deals and discounts. I counted, and one online retailer sent me 40 emails in about 25 days. I’d get one first thing in the morning and then sometimes another one in the afternoon. I fell for this approach as it did get me to buy additional items for myself that I had no intention of buying. Finally, I realized I was falling for the trap and I blocked future emails and sent them directly to junk mail.
Retail marketers are good; they will follow you around to other websites you visit. After you search for a particular item on one website an ad for that same item will pop up on a different website. This is not coincidence. They want you to purchase that item right now.
So, what can you do?
Remind yourself that you did not save $95.36. You spent $305.99 that you will need to pay with your next month’s credit card bill.
If you get cash rewards to redeem, go to the store with a list of items you can get within the amount of the reward. Do not allow yourself to purchase anything during that visit where your total amount exceeds $5 of the cash reward. Do not browse. Go right to the item you want, use your reward dollars and leave.
After you order online, block the next email with the next offer they send you and send it to junk mail so you are not lured in like I was.
Set up your own “retail purchases per month” budget right now. Open an account that is labeled for this purpose. For example, you put $100 per month into a “household/clothing goods” account. Let it build up for a couple of months before you purchase anything. When you charge something in this category, transfer the money spent from your “household/ clothing goods” account to your credit card payment. If you deplete your account, do not buy anything more until you have more in that account.
These are a few ways to stay in that budget even with “deals” coming at you from all directions. Also, remind yourself now and then, that you can’t spend your way to wealth.
Kim Sponem has been CEO & President, since 2002, of Summit Credit Union, a $2.7 billion, member-owned financial cooperative with more than 162,000 members. Kim has a passion for empowering people to improve their financial well-being for a richer life.
Ask Kim your money questions at MoneySmarts@SummitCreditUnion.com.
Design for a Difference – Madison
2015 – Center for Families
2016 – The Rainbow Project
2017 – Centro Hispano FLOOR360.com/DFAD
HARD WOODS SOFT HEARTS
At FLOOR360, we believe in the transformative power of design.
It’s why we carry exclusive lines of hardwood, carpet, tile and stone. It’s why we staff our showroom with certified interior designers who bring your ideas to life. And it’s why we initiated Design for a Difference–Madison, a movement to make over spaces that serve our community. Visit us and see what a difference design can make, both in your home and in our neighborhood. FLOOR360. Design is Our Difference.
THE ART OF HAIR | Be mesmerized by sculptured coifs reminiscent of movies, ancient legends, ethnic tales and fantasy during Hair Affair 2017 on April 27. Local salons will reveal their hair designs in a “Myths & Monsters” theme. The expanded runaway show will be viewable from multiple levels in the Madison Museum of Contemporary Art. The fifth biennial event is a museum fundraiser and helps sustain its free exhibitions and educational programming. MMoCA, Madison. mmoca.org.
POLICY CORNER
HOW TO DIP YOUR TOES INTO THE ADVOCACY WATERS
It’s hard to ignore the current increase in civic engagement. Every day more and more people are turning up at town hall meetings, marching in pink hats or meeting to discuss the hot topics of the day. Last year’s election awakened the advocate in many individuals who are now starting to dip their toes into the policy “waters” for the first time.
For those just now warming up to the idea of incorporating advocacy into their daily lives, I have a few tips to offer.
First, know who is elected to represent you and your needs. It’s estimated that only 7 percent of Wisconsinites can identify who their legislative leaders are in the Wisconsin State Capitol. It’s important to know and communicate with the decision makers who vote on your behalf. My organization, the Wisconsin Alliance for Women’s Health, has created the WhoRepesentsMe.info web page where you can look up your elected representatives. You can program their contact information into your phone or address book to make it easier for you to contact them.
But don’t wait until something big happens to reach out to them. Tonight, when it’s finally quiet and you have a few moments to spare, call and leave a voice mail for your state senator and state representative. Simply leave a message with your name, the city you live in and a quick mention of what’s really important to you. Since the legislative offices aren’t open in the evenings, there’s no pressure and just by reaching out with a quick message, you’re letting your leaders know that you’re paying attention and that you can be a resource to them on an issue you care about. You can always follow up later with another call and a specific ask for them to support or oppose something you care about.
Stay connected to your elected leaders through social media or email newsletters. Follow them on Facebook or Twitter and visit their legislative websites to sign up to receive updates. Knowing who represents you is the first step, staying in touch and communicating with them regularly to let them know how you think they’re doing is essential to a representative government.
No matter what, know the advocacy “waters” are warm and many organizations, including the Alliance for Women’s Health, are ready to help you learn more about issues and to embrace every opportunity to be heard and inform the policy making process. –Sara Finger, founder and executive director, Wisconsin Alliance for Women’s Health
OUT + ABOUT BRAVA-SPONSORED EVENTS
APRIL 20 | BRAVA NIGHT OUT WITH THE 200 BLOCK OF STATE STREET
Join us for a memorable Ladies Night out in historic downtown Madison featuring unique experiences from 12 locally owned businesses. Enjoy giveaways, refreshments, special discounts, a fashion show and more— including the chance to win fabulous prizes. 5-8 p.m. 200 Block of State Street, Madison. Information: BRAVAmagazine.com/event/200stateBNO.
APRIL 23 | SWEAT FOR CHANGE
Attend one (or more!) of seven yoga and fitness classes and 100 percent of your donation will benefit Rape Crisis Center of Dane County. Dragonfly Hot Yoga and Flyght Indoor Cycling, Madison. To register or contribute: danecountyrcc.org.
APRIL 27 | HAIR AFFAIR: THE ART OF HAIR
This festive fundraising evening for the Madison Museum of Contemporary Art celebrates the fantastical nature of the art of hair, showcasing extreme hair sculptures on live models, designed and executed by premier local salons and stylists. The night also features a silent auction, DJ grooves, complimentary hors d’oeuvres from Fresco and signature cocktails. Proceeds help the museum continue to offer free public access to the museum's exhibits and programs. 7-10:30 p.m. Madison Museum of Contemporary Art, Madison. Tickets: mmoca.org/hair
APRIL 29 | FINDING A CURE IN WONDERLAND
Join the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation’s Western Wisconsin Chapter for its spring gala, an unforgettable evening of cocktails, dinner, live and silent auctions and dancing. Your attendance benefits JDRF’s mission to accelerate life-changing breakthroughs to cure, prevent and treat Type 1 diabetes. 5:30 p.m. Monona Terrace, Madison. Tickets: jdrfspringala.org.
MAY 5 | MADISON GO RED FOR WOMEN LUNCHEON
Join the movement that has saved the lives of more than 670,000 women nationwide. Join Go Red For Women and the American Heart Association to celebrate amazing survivors and learn how to live a healthier life. 10:30 a.m.-1 p.m. Monona Terrace, Madison. Information and tickets: goredforwomen.org, (608) 221-8866.
MAY 20 | WISCONSIN WOMEN’S HEALTH FOUNDATION 20TH SPRING GALA
Abigail Nadler recently was promoted from health promotions adviser to account executive at M3 Insurance.
Barbara Nehls-Lowe and Jara Rios were ordained into the Orthodox Catholic Church of America at a March ceremony at the First Unitarian Church in Madison.
UW professor Dr. Tamara Scerpella , one of the nation’s few female professors of orthopedic surgery, was recognized by the American Medical Women’s Association with its Woman in Science Award for her exceptional contributions to medical science through research, publications and leadership. Scerpella is chief of the division of sports medicine, vice chair of the department and team physician for the Badgers. She is also president of Forum, the Society for Women Orthope dic Sports Medicine Specialists.
Formal attire, fine dining and live music and dancing between the four arches in the Wisconsin State Capitol’s rotunda ring in Wisconsin Women’s Health Foundation’s annual fundraiser. All proceeds help the foundation reach over 5,000 women with six statewide programs found in all 72 counties of Wisconsin. 6 p.m.-midnight. Wisconsin State Capitol, Madison. Tickets: wwhf.org/springgala
BRAVA EVENTS
APRIL 28 | BRAVA’S THRIVE CONFERENCE INSPIRING DAY, EMPOWERED LIFE
Get empowered, enriched, educated and entrepreneurial at BRAVA’s THRIVE Conference! Personal and professional development topics will inspire you to nurture yourself, cultivate your potential and thrive in all aspects of life. More than 28 sessions. 8 a.m.-5 p.m. The Edgewater, Madison. Tickets, information and conference schedule: thrivewithbrava.com. More details: See P. 45.
MOXIE
From my kids’ sports injuries to surviving breast cancer, my GHC doctors have always been there for my family. As a proud member-owner I trust my care team to listen to me, answer my questions and care for my overall wellness by taking the time to really know me as a person.
-Jennifer W.
It’s time you actually owned one. At Group Health Cooperative... our member-owners are better together.
Dane County’s only local, non-profit, member-owned cooperative health plan.
IN THEIR OWN WORDS
Author Sagashus Levingston, in her debut book “Infamous Mothers,” due out in May, celebrates strong women who have triumphed—and now thrive, with impact—not despite, but because of their challenging pasts. She shares an excerpt here and the stories of two Madison women.
“INFAMOUS MOTHERS” is a response to a need. As a graduate student, I took a class on global feminism. It was the first class I had ever taken that was fully dedicated to feminism of any kind. I fell in love with it. Giving me the language and context to understand some of my experiences as a woman, it empowered me. Yet, almost as soon as it made me feel visible, feminism had erased me.
While the literature and theory had given voice to the struggles of so many women around the world, women from all kinds of backgrounds, I noticed that women like me were absent from this global stage. I am a single mother with six children by four different dads. I am poor, black—but I am also an entrepreneur who also is completing a Ph.D. Where was the voice of women like me in the literature?
Equally important, on the pages of articles and books throughout the discipline, where were we imagined as people who made a positive impact in the public sphere? We were either the charity cases people were trying to save or the social pathogens that institutions were trying to correct and, in some cases, eradicate. Always at one extreme or the other, rarely were we depicted with complexity. Why? In part because seldom have
we been able to tell our own stories. “Infamous Mothers” is my attempt to address this gap.
In it are the stories of 20 women. All of them are, in one way or another, mothering from the fringes of our society. They were teen mothers, sex workers, drug abusers or baby mamas. Some have been abused by men, others abused by their own fears. All of them are black. At the same time, they are all women who have lived through circumstances they were never meant to survive. More than this, they are making a difference in our world as doulas, business owners, family advocates, artists and more.
This work is important. It gives complexity and depth to some of the stock stories heard about black mothers in the media and popular culture. It also provides two pieces of the story that the news and TV dramas rarely share: the narrative of these women’s triumph and how these mothers make a difference today. The best part is that these women are telling their own stories in their own words using their own voices. Their tales are as eloquent as they are raw. Not only will they will challenge everything you thought you knew about an infamous mother, their testimonies will make you question what you thought you knew about yourself.
–Sagashus Levingston, founder of Infamous Mothers
TAMARA THOMPSON-MOORE FROM DISEMPOWERED AND DISRESPECTED MOTHER TO PROACTIVE LACTATION CONSULTANT AND BIRTH ADVOCATE
WHEN I GO PLACES IN PUBLIC I always notice how people count my children for me.
“Wow, you’ve sure got your hands full.” People think that’s the thing to say to a mother of multiple children, but it really is offensive. When I tell people how many, they’re shocked. They say “you don’t look like you have five kids.” Really what they’re saying is “I had an image of what a mother of five kids would look like, and you don’t fit that.”
Depending on what kind of mood I’m in, I’ll say, “Well, now you can reset what you think mothers of five children look like. Here I am. Nice to meet you.”
I live in a community that some would say is homogenous— mostly upper-middle-class Caucasian. And here I am, with my dark-skinned self and my headwraps on, with my ‘afrocentricity,’ and people don’t know how to receive me. They’ll say things like, “you’re so well-spoken.”
When I first became pregnant I was working at a flower shop and a grocery store. I was like “Oh my God, I’m pregnant!” I had just gotten married. I was 20 years old.
Because I was part-time or I didn’t meet the 40-hour per week requirement, I enrolled in medical assistance. In Illinois, the way it works is, you’re told that now you go to the county health place. I didn’t have a lot of information—you know, what to do, where to go, how to navigate through the hierarchy of 'here is your provider' and 'here is your OB-GYN.'
I had hyperemesis. It’s like morning sickness that isn’t just morning sickness, it’s all the time.
I was watching cable and I saw this show called “A Baby Story.” I would see these mothers have these beautiful birth experiences. But I was so disconnected from that because the county healthcare was so substandard. You feel like sardines coz you’re packed in a room where there’s 100 people and then the way that they talk to you when you come to get the services is like you’re a number. They tell you where your birth is going to happen, and then the provider you get is the provider you get. I wasn’t comfortable with my provider being a male; but there weren’t any other options. I didn’t want to talk to him about my past, that I had sexual trauma. I didn’t want talk to him about why I don’t trust him.
So in the birthing process when Jocelyn was being born, he gave me an episiotomy that I didn’t need. An episiotomy is a laceration to the perineum—the area between the vaginal opening and the anus. He gave me a fourth-degree one, which means from one to
Continued on P. 22 and P.24
BY
PHOTO
ANGELA FERGUSON
FROM TEEN MOM TO CHILD CARE PROVIDER AND CEO HELPING CHILDREN AND FAMILIES THRIVE
I HAD MY FIRST SON a month before my 18th birthday and then I had another one three years after that, another one three years after that, and another child three years after that. All my kids are three years apart. My oldest now is 25. My next one is 22. I have a 19 year old and a 16 year old.
My parents didn’t find out until my eighth month of pregnancy that I was pregnant because I was the normal teenager—I’d come home and I’d go in my room. You know, walk past them—“You want to watch a movie with us?”
“No, I’m okay.” I’d go in my room, and I’d hide it.
One day, my mom was in the kitchen, and I was hungry. My mom was on the phone talking to her sister—her normal routine—and I opened up the refrigerator, and she got a side glance of me from the sweater I had on, and that’s when we had that talk.
The guy I was pregnant by had already cheated on me twice, and I didn’t know how to tell them that.
But I got a lot of support from my parents. When I wanted to quit, my mother was right there. I had my grandmother talking to me like “this is not the end for you.” They didn’t enable me. They were just like “this is not the end. This is the decision that you made. Now here’s what you’re going to have to do.”
They didn’t allow me to lay in that bed in a depression. I had to get up and do what I had to do.
At first I decided I wanted to do hair. Then I decided I wanted to be a CNA. I didn’t plan on being a child care provider in a daycare center. It happened that way. I took my kids to a daycare center that I could not afford. The bill got too high, so I ended up taking them to a home daycare. When I got to the home daycare I saw things that I didn’t like. That’s when I decided that I would just go and do daycare and watch my own kids. I enrolled at MATC and
Continued on P. 24
Your mom will wonder what you did wrong.
Continued from P. 20
Continued from P. 22 the other. So one hole connects to the other hole, one opening. There was no informed consent. They didn’t tell me what was going to happen, why they needed to do it. I was tearing, this is what was explained to me afterward. And so to facilitate the baby’s head coming out, he cut me. He did it so fast, my mother was upset, my husband was upset, everybody was upset.
Jocelyn was born at 4:05 p.m. They had to give me sutures. The nurses were pushing on my stomach, I’m trying to start breast feeding, she went across the room, they…all these things were happening that got into the way of what I thought was a beautiful ideal birth.
I felt so disempowered and victimized, and I felt like a number, like cattle that had like a tag on their ear with a number on it, you know. She doesn’t have a name, she’s number 52 in the herd. She’s just here to consume services that we’re going to give her how we see fit. She’s not here to ask us for what she wants.
I remember my very first post-partum visit. He said “what about birth control?” And I said “no, no thank you I don’t want any right now.” He said, “you will get pregnant again.” He said it like, like I was a, a breeder, like “if you don’t get this birth control you’re gonna get pregnant again,” like “we need to stop that at all costs.”
Now here I am: a married woman, an employed woman. My husband is employed. We live in the Southwest suburbs of Chicago. Our apartment was almost $1,000 for a one bedroom. But because I have this quote, unquote “insurance” I needed to be guarded when I tell people that I am happy about giving birth and building a family. I had to validate that to other people, because of my lack of income. And I thought, I should do something about that.
[Today] I’m a lactation counselor and I notice that having that title gets a certain amount of recognition in the medical field. Being a doula does not, however. Doulas are seen as these hocuspocus kind of folks that don’t really get the same respect that lactation counselors do because there’s all of this science that backs up breastfeeding and lactation. So I can go through the front door of the hospital, right. Being a doula, there’s nothing medical happening here. So I have to kind of go to the back door. But I’m operating in an ancient kind of wisdom. If I stand next to a woman who’s going through something big, you know, it’s a big, significant part of her life. And I say kind words to her— how simple is it to say kind words to someone?—she will have a better outcome than a woman who is in the room by herself going through the same thing. There are all these studies that will show that if I stand next to someone and I say “You can do it, you’re beautiful, you got this, keep going,” she’s gonna have a better outcome. I mean, do we really need science to back that up?
I operate in an ancient kind of wisdom that says birth is natural; that birth is something that the human body is already equipped to do. We have socially disempowered people in a way to where now there’s a need for a doula to teach people to trust their own natural instincts.
I think my super power might possibly be, being able to connect with people on an emotional level and being able to read emotions and to respond to those. I think that’s something that people describe in me.
I can bring calm.
took the introductory class to childcare.
I started doing at-home daycare. My waiting list kept growing and growing. By word of mouth. Not by advertising on Facebook, Instagram. None of that. It was just all word of mouth, what parents saw.
I decided that I was going to go out and get a center. And I’m like, “Ma”—because my mom was my backbone—“help me find this place.” My parents had moved to Madison. When they found out that I was getting a divorce they sold their house and they moved to Madison to support me.
My dad instilled in us the importance of working. Like yard work. We knew how to keep our house clean. When I was younger we didn’t have much but the house was clean.
We started looking online for different places and talking to different realtors. Couldn’t really find anything.
This used to be St. Vincent de Paul. I remember looking through the window and writing down the guy’s phone number and I said, “Well, how much is this place?” And he threw these huge numbers out here. I was like, “Oh, I can’t afford that.” So then I called him again 30 days later, like, “Hey, I still see that this building is for lease. Like how much is it?” Threw these long numbers out there again so I thanked him for his time.
I came back again. I said, “Hey, Larry, it’s Angela”—by that time we were on a first-name basis. I’m like, “So how much is this place?” He asked me did I have a business plan, and I told him yes. And he asked me if I had a budget. I told him I didn’t have one but I would get one.
He set up a meeting with me. I had a whole portfolio of photos from when I first started to have kids. And letters of reference. And then I showed him my waiting list. He was like, “Well, can you afford this?”
I was like, “Oh no, that’s too high.”
“Can you afford this?”
“No, that’s too high.”
But then he was like, “Well how much can you afford?” And when I told him he said, “Okay.”
By the grace of God he just saw something in me and decided to support me. And during the next two years I decided that if he had that much faith in me that I was going to do the same thing for him and this building. I had sliding doors put in, a bathroom installed. I had walls built separating the classrooms, Plexiglas windows put in, the kitchen remodeled. I felt that if he could put that faith in me, I could do the same thing for him.
I’ve come from this skinny girl from the ’hood who had problems just like everybody else, but I decided that I wanted more.
I wanted more.
Editors’ note: Excerpted with permission. To learn more about Infamous Mothers, the business and the movement and to purchase the forthcoming book, visit infamousmothers.com.
Hear author Sagashus Levingston speak at BRAVA’s THRIVE Conference Woman to Watch Power Happy Hour; details P. 45.
HAUTE SHOPPE
FLOWER SEASON
This leather lace-up bootie from S.Oliver features a romantic floral print with metallic overlay. With its low heel and cushioned footbed, this is fashion that feels fabulous.
DESIGN, COLOR, PATTERN
At Rubin's our specialty is modern, custom-made furnishings. This month all fabric furniture is on sale. Stop by today to see our variety of style and finish options!
Cornblooms
716 N. Midvale Blvd. Hilldale - Madison (608) 238-9282
Rubin’s Contemporary Furniture
317 E. Wilson St., Madison (608) 255-8998
670 S. Whitney Way, Madison (608) 274-5575 rubinsfurniture.com
CHEERS TO GREEN BEAUTY!
Hooray ~ we're celebrating our 4 year 'brandiversary!' Many thanks for your stories, testimonials, support and love that you share with us. We're looking forward to many more cheers and developing friendships ahead of us. Handmade fresh from us to you, and made with botanicals + love. Cheers!
Qēt Botanicals
2018 Main St., Cross Plains, WI (608) 798-1Qet
QetBotanicals.com
CLEAN & SOPHISTICATED
Get your home looking its best with Kravet Couture fabrics. Elegant styling and smart patterning will enrich any space! Stop in and let our designers show you how. Grand Opening/Open House May 6th.
Creative Energy Designs, Inc.
125 S. Dickinson Street, Madison (608) 256-7696
creativeenergydesignsinc.com
Z.Bella Boutique
1903 Cayuga St., Suite 101 Middleton, WI (608) 827-8700 zbellaboutique.com
The men and women of the law passionately about their profession, their clients and their community. Committed to unparalleled service, recognized expertise and excellence, our people are invested in the success of their communities. Every year we support events that make a positive impact on the places we live, like the MOVERS FOR MOMS® charitable drive, presented by TWO MEN AND A TRUCK®
Because we believe it is important to give back, we want to take a moment to let you know about this great event in our community.
PLUS SIZE FASHION
Z.Bella Boutique specializes in women's plus-size clothing sizes 14 & up. Visit us today for the best selection of curvy fashion from brands such as Joseph Ribkoff, Lucky Brand, Fresh Produce, Karen Kane, Sympli, Spanx, Nic + Zoe & more. Located just off the beltline in downtown Middleton.
The Montage 5808 Hwy. 51, McFarland (608) 838-7505 themontagehome.com
SHOP OUR BOUTIQUE!
Spring and Summer collections are here! Fresh colors and modern styles to fit all occasions, including this adorable dress made of nylon and spandex which makes it wrinkle free and perfect for travel.
Hours: M-F 10-5:30, Sat 10-5, Sun 11-4
MOVE RS F OR M OMS
MOVERS FOR MOMS® seeks donations of soft goods and toiletries to make life in a shelter a little more gentle. This year’s recipient shelters are YWCA Madison and YWCA Rock County. Donations are accepted at the TWO MEN AND A TRUCK®
partner locations. A full list of donation sites, along with a donation wish list, can be found at https://twomenandatruck.com/movers/wi/madison/community
WEDDING BLISS
As the weather warms, so too do hearts. If this is the year of your Big Day, consider the following themes for this most special occasion. Inspired by a few Madisonians' weddings, BRAVA stylist Shanna Wolf lays out additional ideas and riffs on a theme. From fashion to flowers to general finery, these ideas may help you crystallize your wedding plans. Congratulations!
STYLE
IDEAS INSPIRED BY CAMILLE PLESHA AND ANDREW KEZER'S WEDDING: 1 Floral designs by Simply Glamorous Designs 2 Dress by Mes Amies, $186; Mes Amies Boutique 3 Francesca heel by Carrano, $144; Cornblooms 4 Paper designs by Sugar Pear Designs 5 Cake designed by Bloom Bake Shop 6 Place card holders, custom floral boxes by Lovely Retro Renos, available at Simply Glamorous Designs.
STYLED
WEDDING PHOTO BY HILLARY SCHAVE
(TOP CENTER,) STYLED AND PHOTOGRAPHED BY SHANNA WOLF (IMAGES 1-6)
STYLED IDEAS INSPIRED BY MIRANDA GILCHRIST AND ANDY GUNDERSON'S WEDDING: 1 Dress by Mes Amies, $96; Mes Amies Boutique 2 Paper designs by Sugar River Stationers 3 Cake designed by Bloom Bake Shop 4 Preserves made by the bride and groom. 5 Floral designs by Surroundings Events and Floral 6 Paper designs by Sugar River Stationers.
WEDDING PHOTO BY HILLARY SCHAVE (TOP LEFT), STYLED AND PHOTOGRAPHED BY SHANNA WOLF (IMAGES 1, 3, 4), STYLED BY STACEY ANDERSON (IMAGE 2)
STYLED IDEAS INSPIRED BY ANTONINA GILL'S AND BRIAN MOORE'S WEDDING: 1 Mia sandal by Eric Michael, $112; Cornblooms 2 Styled by Stacey Anderson, BRAVA Magazine 3 Floral provided by Daffodil Parker 4 Cake designed by Gigi’s Cupcakes
The morebeautiful th e moment, t he morebeautiful the memory. Embraceunforgettable style. ChooseMonona Terrace in Madison.
Bring us your wedding day dreams—of breathtaking backdrops and stunning tabletops—and let us help bring them to life in a captivating lakeside location. Envision your special day at mononaterrace.com
CAPTAIN AMERICA IS A NONJUDGMENTAL LISTENER. No matter who’s reading what book, his tail is wagging. He seems to be smiling, wanting only for someone to pet him. And that’s encouraging for the young boy who’s practically whispering the words of a children’s book into Captain’s floppy ears.
The affable beagle is a member of Dogs on Call, Inc., whose volunteer owners and their pets provide activities and therapy to a variety of groups. On this weekend, Captain and owner Chelsea Schaack, along with Kym Thompson and her French bulldog Latte, were at Lakeview Library as part of the Pet Partners Read with Me program, which sets up at libraries all over Dane County so kids can come in and read to the animals.
“They’re a nonjudgmental listener and that goes a long way,” Laura Kuchta, president of the Madison chapter, says of the animals. “The child pets the animal, they relax, their blood pressure lowers and they actually enjoy reading, which is something they don’t always do at other places.”
Dogs on Call volunteers and their animals—including a few cats, a bunny and some mini horses—visit hospitals, nursing homes and assisted living facilities, psychiatric centers and jails and the UWMadison dorms.
Kuchta tells the story of one pet partner who brought her Newfoundland dog to the Veterans Hospital in Madison. “Some of the
veterans really don’t say anything and they’ll just bury their faces in the fur of that big Newfoundland and they may just cry for awhile. And then when that’s over, when their emotions are out, they’ll look up and say ‘you know I really just needed that. Thank you for coming to visit.’”
Studies have shown that pet therapy lowers blood pressure, eases fear and anxiety and brightens moods.
Laurie Ingwell, volunteer recruitment coordinator at Unitypoint Health-Meriter, says there are few places the therapy pets can’t go in the hospital, and even the family, visitors and staff benefit. “It brings joy to everyone,” she says.
Dogs on Call started nearly 10 years ago and has 120 members in the Madison area. It’s always looking for more, especially volunteers interested in going to medical facilities and nursing homes, Kuchta says. Animals must pass certain behavior tests before beginning their service.
Captain, as it happens, has been serving humans most of his life. He was once a research animal and has a tattoo on his ear to prove it. Then he helped train vet techs at Madison College. Now he’s a Dogs on Call card carrying member—really. Schaack has baseball cards with Captain’s image on them. He’s a very good boy. –Marni McEntee
For more information, visit dogsoncall.org.
Therapy dogs Ghandi (above), Swing (top right), and Disney.
THE ART OF SAYING NO
SAYING NO USED TO BE EASY. In the absence of any real skills or responsibilities, no is often a lark, a negotiation—a right.
Filled with the entitlement often present in youth, I was my own champion. I lost every race in high school. Every. Single. Race. So in my senior year, the track coach said, “Please don’t run this season. It’s painful to watch you and what’s the point?”
I countered, “I’ll make you a deal. I won’t run if I get to be on the team, ride the bus and hang with the athletes.” He agreed.
I didn’t want to be a miler. I didn’t even want to run, but there were cute boys on that track bus—and I was all about the boys. My coach told me no but in effect, I said no right back.
However, as I aged that direct two-letter word stopped being a mere utterance and became a life question. Figuring out when to use it is often complex. The easy no’s are the ones we say to simplify our lives. “No, I’m not baking cookies for a second-grade soccer team for an unhealthy post-game snack.” “No, I’m not going to fill a volunteer spot that already has too many volunteers.” The key is prioritizing your boundaries and values. Also do something about that internal guilt wreaking havoc—tune it out!
Occasionally, the harder no’s are the ones we receive. Where someone or something stops us from an intended progression or stymies our plans. The real-life questions are about perseverance or rest. Do I accept this roadblock or proceed around it?
Equally important scenarios will warrant a different response. In graduate school, when a professor said that maybe I wasn’t cut out for an advanced degree, I changed schools, swapped mentors and finished my doctorate degree. When my body said, “Good grief that pregnancy was hard, maybe two kids is enough for you.” I reflected, “Yep. Bring on the birth control.”
Sometimes when a no is flung at you, you say no right back, foraging ahead toward the desired outcome. But, at times no does means no, and the better choice is to carve an alternate path. There may not be a medal for giving up, but acceptance can be just as rewarding as going for the gold. The answer is always and entirely yours to give.
My mom and I were world class shopping partners, and often I’d ask her if I should buy a particular blanket or a chair. She’d say, “It’s up to you. It’s not my house it’s going into.” As usual, she was right. No and yes live together in the house you build for yourself. You just have to decide what you want in that house—and it can take a whole life to sort out. –Ann Garvin
Garvin speaks about designing the life you want to live at BRAVA’s THRIVE Conference April 28. Details: P. 45 and thrivewithbrava.com
Specializing in all of your bedding needs. All comforters and pillows are handcrafted in our La Crosse, WI factory. Up to 60% off Every Day!
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TEXTURE RULES FOR OUTDOOR DECOR
TAKE YOUR FAVE rustic and industrial looks outside this spring with these funky patterns and colors. That Edison bulb light fixture is perfectly portable. Or cozy up by the fire pit on a deep rattan-look chair and let the kids perch on a pouf. Spring has sprung! – Marni McEntee
Clockwise from top left: Divergence outdoor pendant by Hubbardton Forge, prices vary; Madison Lighting. Artstone planter by Novelty, $60; black and gold planter by Grasslands Road, $30; The Bruce Company. Kilim indoor outdoor lumbar pillow, $25; World Market. Samode indoor outdoor rug by Dash & Albert, prices vary; The Home Market. Pouf cube by Surya, $278; The Bruce Company. Yuma fire pit, $199; World Market. Malibu swivel glider by North Cape, $899, Steinhafels.
REPURPOSED PORCHES SHOP YOUR OWN HOUSE FOR DÉCOR
by marni mcentee
ORGANIZER EXTRAORDINAIRE TRICIA NOWICKI used her own front porch as a guinea pig of sorts, jazzing up the narrow space with some seasonal décor. As much as it’s a great example for would-be clients of Nowicki’s business Get Organized, it’s also a much more inviting place for her family.
The scene can be changed by the season—and should be, to get the most out of the square footage, Nowicki says. “I envision reading a book while enjoying a nice glass of lemonade in the warmer months and, in the fall, cozying up with a hot cup of tea.”
Nowicki says she “shops” her own home first when looking for furniture and accessories. She even turned a salvaged black shutter into a coffee table, using some wood she bought to make into legs. Birch stumps became seating.
She says adding pillows and blankets soften a space and florals and green brighten it.
“Think about different ways you might use an item besides its intended purpose,” Nowicki recommends. “Think outside the box.”
Millie & Marshall Osborn Kay & Martin Barrett
Helen Wineke
Paul Jones Charitable Trust
If our ancestors had outdoor spaces designed this well, indoor living may have never caught on.
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ROCK SOLID DEFY GRAVITY AT BOULDERS CLIMBING GYM
BY RACHEL WERNER
ASCENDING TO THE TOP takes more than pure grit at Boulders Climbing Gym. For 20 years, the facility has been a rigorous training ground for novice rock climbers, competitive teams, recreational clubs and bouldering aficionados.
Though brute force may be useful in initial ascents, Manager Katie Schultz says it’s often easier for women to excel in the sport because the mental strategy needed to navigate a challenging slope may come more naturally to women than to men. “Women are very suited to climbing, usually due to a larger range of flexibility and a lower center of gravity,” she explains. “Having less physical barriers and limitations often affords us extra time and mental space while scaling a surface.”
Schultz also emphasizes Boulders’ commitment to ensuring all its members and day visitors feel empowered and have access to the right tools and instruction to achieve success on-site and during outdoor expeditions. The gym offers yoga instruction three to four times a week, aimed at building core strength and preventing injuries. Each month it also hosts outside groups such as Madison Women Climbers and a special adaptive climbers’ series for participants with special needs.
“It’s very affirming when people think they can’t do it, then make it to the top,” she says. “And seeing the women belayed next to you do well doesn’t detract from, but only deepens, your success.” bouldersgym.com
Boulders Climbing Gym 3964 Commercial Ave., Madison info@bouldersgym.com
Inspiring Day.
Friday, April 28, 2017
The Edgewater, Madison | 8 AM - 5 PM
TITLE SPONSOR
Get ready to THRIVE!
Shift the pursuit of your dreams into high gear at the 2017 THRIVE Conference! Chart your unique path to personal enrichment, professional development or entrepreneurship via activities and breakout sessions. You’ll gain powerful tips, tools and insights, polish your skills and personal brand and meet likeminded women. You'll leave the conference inspired to nurture yourself, cultivate your potential and thrive in all aspects of your life.
CLARIFY YOUR DRIVING INFLUENCES CHART A CLEAR FINANCIAL ROADMAP GATHER VALUABLE LOCAL CONNECTIONS EMBRACE YOUR INNER CREATIVE SPIRIT POLISH YOUR PERSONAL BRAND SMILE FOR A PROFESSIONAL HEADSHOT FIND CLARITY: LEARN TO MEDITATE PRIORITIZE SELF-CARE AND IMPROVE YOUR WELLBEING GET FOCUSED WITH LASER BUSINESS AND LIFE COACHING LEARN ABOUT THE BENEFITS OF MENTORSHIPS NETWORK WITH LIKE-MINDED WOMEN AND PROFESSIONALS WORK ON TEAM-BUILDING— BRING YOUR COLLEAGUES LAUNCH THAT ENTREPRENEURIAL IDEA DESIGN A HOLISTIC VISION FOR PERSONAL AND PROFESSIONAL FULFILLMENT NOURISH YOUR SOUL ENVISION A BIGGER PICTURE FOR YOURSELF
KEYNOTE SPEAKER | SHILAGH MIRGAIN
FORGET WORK/LIFE BALANCE—FIND FLOW
Believing in your potential to do magnificent things doesn’t magically transform into achieving what’s possible. In our scheduled lifestyles, we can mistakenly seek “balance” as the pathway to success—only to become frustrated and overwhelmed by seemingly endless, daily demands. Health expert Shilagh Mirgain demystifies how to instead cultivate a sense of flow and live in the present moment to increase happiness, wellbeing, creativity and productivity.
Shilagh Mirgain is a health and sport psychologist at UW Health. A sought-after speaker, writer, facilitator and therapist, she is a frequent contributor to BRAVA Magazine, and has been featured nationally on the TODAY show. She writes, speaks and trains on mindfulness meditation, mind-body skills to foster optimal health, happiness and wellbeing.
Schedule
Craft your perfect day—whether you’re attending to focus on your personal life, professional life or both. Choose from 12 inspiring workshops in four powerful categories—plus an uplifting keynote and 14 bonus workshops and sessions in between. Categories include:.
EMPOWER: Develop the skills and tools you need to live life on your terms, fine tune your skills, set boundaries and gain financial freedom.
ENRICH: Spark your creativity to reveal a new approach to holistic living and self-care. Design the life you want to live by delving deeper and unleashing your inner voice.
EDUCATE: Gather the vital knowledge you need—then dare to lead and influence your team and workplace culture in a positive way.
ENTREPRENEUR: Harness your authentic power and leverage business basics and crucial insights for start-up launches, funding and marketing.
Registration | Vendor Booths Open | Laser Coaching Sessions with Darcy Luoma Coaching and Consulting and Summit Credit Union.
Optional Workshop: How to Meditate with Bekah Grant — 8:15-8:45 AM
Optional Workshop: Speed Networking with Megan Watt — 8:15-8:45 AM
Strategic Mentorship, Career Coaching and Sponsoring
Tania Ibarra & Lisa Peyton-Caire
Working Solo Not Silo THE JILLS OF ALL TRADES
Harness Your Authentic Power
Adrianne Machina
Women to Watch Power Happy Hour with Kyira Hauer, Sagashus Levingston, Sandy Morales and Ashley Quinto Powell
Vendor Booths | Laser Coaching Sessions | Head Shots
Empower Enrich
Live life on your terms.
PERSONAL BRANDING FOR PROFESSIONAL GROWTH
with Ellen Bartkowiak
If you haven’t taken the time to solidify your personal brand, here’s your opportunity! This session focuses on the importance of personal branding, the basic formula for creating your brand and how to implement it. Learn how your brand can empower you for the next phase in your career—the promotion, the career change or the entrepreneurial leap.
A sought-after speaker, coach, consultant and president of EllenCoaching, Ellen Bartkowiak is a 20-year career management expert who helps experienced professionals accelerate their careers.
PENNY BY PENNY, CREATE THE LIFE YOU WANT
with Amy Crowe
Struggling with finding the money to live an authentic life and reach the goals you secretly desire? Find out how spending habits, emotions and the stories we tell ourselves prevent us from taking steps forward. Learn how the “every penny needs a home” strategy can make big changes in your financial and personal life.
Certified financial educator, personal finance guru and motivational speaker Amy Crowe has a passion for inspiring people to reach their financial dreams.
TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE WITH HEALTHY BOUNDARIES
with Jessica Schultz
Healthy boundaries are one of the most powerful and influential aspects of our lives. They can facilitate change and growth within ourselves—and our relationships—leading to deeper, safer connections. But when they’re not calibrated properly, we can lose touch with our self-worth, and struggle. This session will help you explore your invisible barriers and develop appropriate boundaries toward total life transformation.
Jessica Schultz helps individuals, couples and families holistically re-create lifestyles, re-write personal stories and increase physical and mental wellbeing through her company BeYOUtiful Minds & Fitness.
Spark your creativity.
CONNECTING
TO YOUR CREATIVITY | UNLEASH YOUR INNER WISDOM
with Theresa Kim
We all have a hamster wheel in our head that spins around with thoughts of self-criticism, doubts, comparisons and old tapes of who we think we are supposed to be. When we embrace creativity, we can quiet that repetitive negativity and tap into our inner wisdom’s grace and certainty. This hands-on art workshop guides you to clarity through creativity—no expertise required!
Theresa Kim is a professional life coach who uses art and creativity to help people quiet the negative thinking in their heads and create their best lives.
HOLISTIC STRESS MANAGEMENT AND SELF-CARE
with Sheba McCants
This interactive workshop explores the effects of stress on your body and mind and helps you reflect on where stress shows up in your life—your work, family, relationships, finances, health or all of the above. Through movement and mindfulness activities and thoughtprovoking discussion, you’ll discover a powerful set of simple tools and practical strategies for managing stress, practicing holistic self-care and living in balance.
Sheba McCants, a Madison native with a passion for the arts, wellness and community, is the community engagement and events coordinator at Domestic Abuse Intervention Services (DAIS).
DESIGNING THE LIFE YOU WANT TO LIVE
with Ann Garvin
The steps to sustainable reinvention come with evaluation, patience and practice. Get started in this workshop through a series of exercises that evaluate your physical, emotional, mental and spiritual needs, and clarify what is and isn’t working in your life. You’ll create a vision for your future that includes more of what you want and less of what others want for you.
Ann Garvin, Ph.D., is a sought-after speaker, award-winning writer, long-time college educator and founder of tallpoppies.org and thefifthsemester.com. Her work’s focus is health psychology, health education and humor.
Educate Entrepreneur
Gather vital knowledge.
EXPLORING AND ADDRESSING GENERATIONAL AND CULTURAL BIASES IN THE WORKPLACE
with Deborah Biddle
Unconscious biases are a fact of life. Everyone has them—and takes them into the workplace, where they can stymie diversity, recruiting and retention efforts, and unintentionally shape an organization’s culture. In this session, you will explore ways to examine and address implicit bias and its impact upon individuals, your organization and other spheres of personal and professional influence.
Leadership and development coach Deborah Biddle brings over 25 years of business leadership, operations, talent development, project and change management, communications, strategic planning and financial analysis experience to her clients.
CONFIDENT COMMUNICATIONS | CREATING A POSITIVE & EFFECTIVE WORKPLACE
with Susan Young
Whether you seek to unify your team, create a more positive workplace, increase sales or deliver better customer service, your communication skills are crucial to your success. Learn to avoid communication roadblocks and deliver effective messages and build your confidence and credibility.
Founder of the speaking and training firm Susan Young International, Susan speaks to national organizations and leaders about leveraging the power of change to improve positivity and performance.
STRATEGIC MENTORSHIP, CAREER COACHING AND SPONSORING
with Tania Ibarra & Lisa Peyton-Caire
Mentorship, career coaching and sponsorship play important roles in advancing women and underrepresented populations to leadership roles. This workshop will highlight the differences between these approaches, as well as the differences between how women and men approach them. You’ll learn to assess your need for each, the effectiveness of your current approach to them and develop an action plan for implementing them into your career and workplace.
Tania Ibarra is a CPA and visionary strategist who brings deep skills, knowledge and business experience gained in her successful career in finance, assurance, accounting and consulting services.
Lisa Peyton-Caire is assistant vice president of Life, Learning & Events at Summit Credit Union.
Harness your authentic power.
FROM STARTUP TO FUNDED: WINNING THE CASH YOU NEED TO LAUNCH YOUR ENTREPRENEURIAL DREAM
with Summit Credit Union’s Amy Crowe and Dana Hoffman, & Doyenne Group’s Amy Gannon
Learn the nuts and bolts in this power session on moving from start-up to sustainably funded. Uncover the essential elements of a strong business plan and prepare a winning “loan package” that boosts your chances for securing launch money. You’ll leave ready to build a business that’s made to last.
Summit Credit Union offers several programs for helping individuals achieve both personal and business goals and dreams. Founded by Amy Gannon and Heather Wentler, the Doyenne Group builds ecosystems that invest in the power and potential of women entrepreneurs
WORKING SOLO, NOT SILO with THE JILLS OF ALL TRADES: Megan Boswell & Corinne Neil
Are you a solopreneur? You’re not alone. Over the next 10 years, 50 percent of the U.S. workforce will work as independent consultants and businesses owners. If your career is headed in this “gig” economy direction, this workshop provides invaluable tips and tactics and shares the joys of working independently.
Megan Boswell and Corinne Neil are co-founders of THE JILLS OF ALL TRADES, an online platform that links and lifts women entrepreneurs, consultants and freelancers with businesses on project-by-project collaborations.
HARNESS YOUR AUTHENTIC POWER
with Adrianne Machina
Powerful marketing comes from tapping into your passion—and your authenticity, transparency and vulnerability. How can you “be real” and professional at the same time? Learn to tell stories that resonate with your audience and attract clients who fill your soul—and your business’ bank account.
Adrianne Machina is the chief velocity officer of Tornado Marketing and an in-demand copywriter, speaker and consultant who also teaches marketing to entrepreneurs.
Extras
Enjoy these optional activities throughout the day to enhance your experience and provide additional tools, tips and takeaways.
SPEED NETWORKING
with Megan Watt
Through highly interactive speed networking rounds, you’ll join fellow attendees to make new connections, learn how to move your ideas forward and develop win-win relationships.
Megan Watt is an innovative and highly sought-after speaker, facilitator and career coach, inspiring people to take new action in their lives.
LASER LIFE COACHING
with Darcy Luoma Coaching & Consulting
Gain clarity and see your passions from a new perspective in these free 15-minute laser coaching sessions with the Darcy Luoma team. Come with a topic in mind and experience how coaching can help you bring your dreams to life!
The Darcy Luoma Coaching & Consulting team helps clients take powerful steps toward creating the life they want, helping them take action to achieve both personal and professional growth and clarity.
LASER BUSINESS COACHING
with Summit Credit Union
Share your business idea and get instant feedback on business planning to help launch your entrepreneurial idea or grow your existing business in 15-minute laser sessions provided by Summit Credit Union’s Business Services Vice Presidents Dana Hoffman, Jim Holden and Julie Spitzack and cash management, credit and business experts Kate Huebner and Alma Howland.
RUN FOR OFFICE
with Emerge Wisconsin and Erin Forrest
No matter what side of the aisle you’re on, get the facts about running for office. Hear the current state of women’s representation in government, why it’s important for women to have a seat at the table, why women aren’t running in the same numbers as men and—perhaps most importantly—what we can do about it!
Erin Forrest is the executive director of Emerge Wisconsin, an organization dedicated to inspiring Democratic women to run for office and teaching them the skills they need to win.
LEARN TO MEDITATE
with Bekah Gant
Slowing down seems antithetical to achieving dreams, but in reality, it provides a framework on which to build dreams and to achieve success. Learn to incorporate meditation and mindfulness into your busiest days and access your innate power.
Bekah Gant is a yoga and meditation instructor at Dragonfly Hot Yoga and has taught over 700 hours of yoga and meditation classes.
PROFESSIONAL HEAD SHOT MINI-SESSION
with Shanna Wolf
Session Cost: $35
Professional head shot mini sessions available during the THRIVE conference include:
10-minute session, shot on location at the Edgewater Hotel
Private preview album emailed to you for review
Opportunity to select your favorite image and receive a high-resolution fully edited JPEG (additional images may be purchased for a small charge)
To secure your session time early, email shanna@bravaenterprises.com or book the day of the conference.
Shanna Wolf is a longtime BRAVA sylist and photographer.
Extras
BRAVA Women to Watch Power Happy Hour
End the day at this energetic and inspirational happy hour and hear short stories of success and fulfillment from four of BRAVA’s Women to Watch. Each has made important changes happen in our community—and beyond. Enjoy speciality cocktails made with the all-new Baileys Almande.
IGNITING YOUR SPARK
with Kyira Hauer, artist, mental health professional and 2017 BRAVA Woman to Watch
COVER GIRL MAGIC
with Sagashus Levingston, founder of Infamous Mothers and 2017 BRAVA Magazine Woman to Watch
KEEP YOUR EYE ON THE PRIZE
with Sandy Morales, CEO of Big Brothers Big Sisters of Dane County and 2015 BRAVA Magazine Woman to Watch
RISING TIDES RAISE ALL BOATS
with Ashley Quinto Powell, Business Development Manager for Bendyworks and 2017 BRAVA Magazine Woman to Watch
Summit Credit Union
Sundara Inn & Spa
UW Health
Bailey’s
Metcalfe’s Market
WWBIC | Wisconsin Women’s Business Initiative Corporation
Fred Astaire Dance Studios
AMPT | Advanced Manual Physical Therapy
SVA Certified Public Accountants
Mes Amies Dress Boutique
Darcy Luoma Coaching & Consulting and more!
A Career
BY SHELBY DEERING
PHOTOGRAPHED BY HILLARY SCHAVE
Robert Frost once famously wrote, “ Two roads diverged in a wood, and I I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” When you wake up each morning to get ready for work, what road are you taking? The one that ’ s free of obstacles, and that you know like the back of your hand, but presents little excitement or passion? Or one marked by heart- centered values, fulfillment and self - discovery?
Work is an undeniable, and sizeable, portion of our lives. Although it offers financial security and a feeling of stability, a career can also serve as a source of joy in one’s life. Work and happiness can go hand-in-hand.
So, what does the road to a career change look like? If you are considering taking the leap, plan for some soul searching, big questions and personal challenges. They’re standard checkpoints on any path that leads to a rich, thriving life.
Luckily, sage local experts—both coaches and women who have made the leap—are here to offer their wise words around the process, the roadblocks, the merits of making a career change and how to make that change less daunting.
Darcy Luoma, president and owner of Darcy Luoma Coaching & Consulting, who coaches individuals and groups to intentionally craft their futures, went through a career reinvention of her own. For over a decade, she served as the director of U.S. Sen. Herb Kohl’s office. When he chose not to seek re-election, Luoma was at a crossroads.
She says, “I hired a coach and she helped me figure out how my values had shifted and changed.” The coach asked a series of “really powerful questions,” says Luoma. “I realized that if I kept playing it safe and only focused on my retirement and savings accounts, I would have regrets.”
Luoma says that she decided to “step into” her passion, a major shift from the risk-averse career she had pursued for over 20 years.
Today, Luoma is a professional speaker, life coach and leadership expert, carrying out a value she calls “aliveness.”
As to where to start, Luoma says, “I think it comes down to giving yourself the time and the faith and the permission to ask powerful questions and be very present and open to the answers.”
In addition to books, seminars and quizzes that pose these tough questions, Luoma also recommends speaking to a close friend, family member or confidante who can “hold up the mirror and reflect back.”
Deborah Biddle, a consultant and coach through her business High Performance Development Solutions, acts as one of those “mirrors” as she guides people through career transitions.
“Clients typically begin the process concerned and sometimes confused about what the future
holds,” she says. Biddle helps her clients evaluate their options before jumping into a job search and uses techniques to nudge them toward uncovering their true talents and ideals.
Biddle says, “When considering a career change, avoid making decisions based on what is urgent, practical, logical or lucrative without consciously considering how your interests, skills, passions and values contribute to your overall job satisfaction and success.”
She notes that although some people know their purpose when they’re young, others don’t have that straight and narrow path. In that case, Biddle recommends trying “as many things as you can until you find the career that gives you joy, pays the salary you want and engages your mind, talents and abilities.”
Although finances need to be considered when making a career shift—Biddle recommends saving enough money to live on for three to six months— Sybil Pressprich, senior counselor at the University of Wisconsin–Madison’s Adult Career and Special Student Services, is a proponent of taking action.
As she leads people through self-assessments and identifying pathways to achieve goals, she shares her No. 1 tip, which is, “Don’t wait until you are 100 percent clear on what you want to do before taking action. Often we think we can figure out this problem if we just wait and think about it long and hard. But that’s not how you will get clarity.”
Instead, she suggests reading about career fields, participating in informational interviews, doing job shadows and finding volunteer positions.
Pressprich believes that a person’s purpose gets clearer as one “experiences more.”
But going out into the world and exploring a dream can be unnerving at times.
“Remember that action is the enemy of fear,” she says.
In that vein, Pressprich asserts, “Take action toward that faint light that is of interest. Don’t wait. Be open to discovering your purpose by serendipity and stick to the process of self-assessment and reflection, exploration, goal-setting and taking action toward those goals.”
The following women have done just that. They’ve already traveled the road toward career reinvention and realized their dreams, serving as examples that it can be done.
Light a Spark
Jesse Skaltizky loves children. The mom of three started a family with her husband, Paul, right out of college. “But the thought of never being pregnant again was devastating to me,” she says. With a degree in cellular biology from UW-Madison and a background as a student embryologist, her mind turned to surrogacy. She delivered three healthy babies to grateful families while staying home full-time with her kids. She was content—but she couldn’t shake her dream of helping even more families grow.
She explains, “I remember the moment. It was during my second surrogacy, and my intended parents were visiting. They told me, ‘You have this gift that you can share. Now is the perfect time in your life to just take the leap.’ Within a week, my husband and I put together a business plan and filed for an LLC.”
The result was Pink & Blue Surrogacy and Fertility. As the owner and program coordinator, Skaltizky specializes in finding and matching intended parents and surrogates throughout the country and as far away as Europe, Asia and Australia.
Going from a career as a stay-at-home-mom to a mompreneur was “scary” at first, but Skaltizky says that shortly after launching the business, “things fell into place very quickly and easily.”
The ease can undoubtedly be credited to Skaltizky’s background and knowledge, but it can also be attributed to the fact that she is helping people make meaningful, impactful change in their lives.
“It’s fulfilling for me emotionally to be able to do something I love and support my family, but also grow families on a daily basis,” she says.
When Skaltizky thinks of others making the leap, she recommends that they seek out “support and encouragement from their people.” She also believes in finding personal fulfillment through a career.
“I think when you find something that makes you feel fulfilled, you’re better at everything you do in life. You’re happier at home, you’re happier with what you do, you’re happier in your community and maybe you’re more willing to volunteer. It lights a spark.”
Skaltizky isn’t promising that when you do make the transition, things will be perfect. In fact, there will be difficult times amid the joy. But she believes that the struggle is worth it.
“It’s not all sunshine and rainbows. But at the end of the day, no matter how bad a day it’s been, I go to bed happy knowing that there are a lot of babies in this world and a lot of new parents and growing families because of what I’m able to help do. And that’s very fulfilling.”
" it ' s fulfilling for me emotionally
to be able to do something I love and suppport my family, but also grow families on a daily basis. "
Be Yourself
A career as a lawyer is certainly an investment— time, finances, effort. So, when a person decides to forgo all of that to do a career 180, it points to a decision that required substantial introspection.
That’s Diane Krause-Stetson’s story. She graduated in 1982 from UW-Madison’s Law School and jumped in as a labor lawyer at a midsized firm. Krause-Stetson spent years building her career, was recruited by Fortune 100 and multinational corporations and eventually worked as a vice president of human resources for a private company.
“Sometimes I was used as an example of being able to aim high,” says Krause-Stetson. There is a connecting fiber among those who make a major career change—a pivotal experience. For Krause-Stetson, it was losing her 48-year-old cousin to breast cancer in 1999. When she was asked to give the eulogy, she began to examine her own life. She made the decision to retire from her law career. And in a cottage on Elkhart Lake, KrauseStetson began to think back on the past decades.
“I have since understood that I was driven as much, if not more, by not feeling good enough and my fear of failure as I was by a desire to succeed.”
Krause-Stetson’s path to self-discovery led to a coaching business and a role as the owner of retail
" i have since understood
that i was driven as much, if not more, by not feeling good enough and my fear of failure as i was by a desire to succeed. "
locations Style Encore Madison and Plato’s Closet Madison East and West.
Specializing in gently used, name-brand clothing, these are the places where Krause-Stetson finds “personal satisfaction” through creating a “family atmosphere” and developing close relationships with her young employees.
“Everyone knows that my husband and I are more than employers. My love of connection and mentoring is a part of that.”
For others who are considering a new career, Krause-Stetson shares three steps to take, based on her own experiences and know-how as a coach.
First, she advises that it’s important to dig deeply into why you are considering making a career change.
“Whether someone is not content with where they are in their career, it is important for them to know more about who they are now. They may think they are unhappy with their career, but it may be just their current working environment. Perhaps the culture is incompatible with their way of working or even their values.”
The second step is to talk about the things that are important.
As a start, Krause-Stetson says to consider whether you want to work “independently or collaboratively” or “require freedom or prefer structure.”
Krause-Stetson recommends wrapping up the process by talking through making the decision with someone and acting on what matters most to you now.
“In this stage, you examine the desires and goals and create the plan of action to achieve them,” she says.
Krause-Stetson is living out her plan of action— and dreams—through her newfound career, using a saying from coach Thomas Leonard as her guide: “I don’t want to change anymore. I just want to be more of myself.”
Ask What’s Next
There are those of us who choose a second act for our lives. Or a third act. Or perhaps a fourth. Mary Helen Conroy is one of those people.
Conroy has worked as a public librarian on the South Side of Chicago, a library building consultant, and while she completed her doctoral program in adult education at UW-Madison, she took a job as a sales consultant at the publication Women in Higher Education, and that’s where she stayed for over 18 years.
But then the publication was sold in 2014, leaving a 62-year-old Conroy without a job.
“I can still see myself locking the door for the last time and walking off that stoop saying, ‘Now what?’ I had no idea what I was going to do,” she says.
But she knew that she wasn’t going to just “sit on a couch.” So, she set a goal for herself in her first year that she was no longer working at the publication—a “50 Cups of Coffee Challenge” through which she would meet 50 new people.
That’s how she met Carol Larson, a one-time broadcast journalist and producer for Wisconsin Public Radio and Television. They found themselves in similar life stages. And they both wanted to take action.
So, they founded RetireeRebels.com, an online destination tailored to the newly retired featuring encouraging content and four podcast categories through which “Rebel” retirees are interviewed and enlightening observations are shared.
She says, “[Carol and I] both knew that there was a demographic there that needed to know not about the money about retirement, but about the life issues of retirement. People tell us that you need so much money, but it doesn’t matter when the first month of retirement is lonely and scary and rocky and you’re having panic attacks when your alarm clock doesn’t go off. That’s why we started RetireeRebels.com.”
Conroy says she’s excited about the lives they’ve touched, particularly when they hold events at senior centers and speak with retirees face-to-face. Her experiences have even inspired her to write a book: “Your Amazing Itty Bitty Retirement Book: 15 Essential Tips for You, the Nearly and Newly Retired.”
“It warms the cockles of my heart and gives my life purpose," she says.
Conroy is also a reinvention life coach and CEO of her business Life’s a Daring Adventure, supporting people as they make transitions. For those thinking of leaping to another career, she uses the three R’s: review, retreat and reinvent.
First, she suggests making a timeline of your life—what gave you pleasure? Angst? What was left undone? Then give yourself time to be alone and reflect. Lastly, she urges pondering the question
“How do you want your life to be?” with the help of a journal, dream board or life coach.
The inspiration for Conroy’s business name is a beloved Helen Keller quote: “Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.” But Conroy always adds her personal mark to the end of it: “…And I’m not done yet.”
The Next Step
If you ’ ve just started thinking about making a change, there are plenty of resources that can put you on the road toward your authentic purpose and a brand - new career.
StrengthsFinder 2.0 is a popular book and online resource that provides an all - encompassing self - assessment through which you ’ ll determine your top five talents. strengthsfinder.com
The classic Myers - Briggs Type Indicator is a go - to for consultants, counselors and coaches. Once you discover your personality type, it may be easier to land on a career that fits your unique characteristics. It can be taken online or through a trained professional. myersbriggs.org
UW - Madison ’ s Adult Career and Special Student Services offers career - planning workshops, like Tools for Purposeful Career Change, an intensive two - day workshop, and Career Change 101, a two - hour session that gives participants tools to get them started.
continuingstudies.wisc.edu/advising
The U.S. Department of Labor has resources available to those switching careers, like its website O * NET OnLine where you can take an “ Interest Profiler ” quiz. onetonline.org
“ What Color is Your Parachute? ” has become a quintessential book for career - changers since its release in 1970. The new edition holds practical advice for navigating the job markeT. jobhuntersbible.com
Attend the April 28 BRAVA THRIVE Conference to focus on and explore your career and personal possibilities. Sign up for laser life and career coaching sessions with Darcy Luoma Coaching & Consulting as well as professional head shots and networking sessions. For details and to register: thrivewithbrava.com
“Don’t you quit on me,” says coach Leo Morel at Canvas Club Boxing. “Don’t you give up. You don’t have to be nice. I know you are upset about something; find that energy and punch it out. That’s it. Keep punching it out.”
Morel is coaching a diverse group of women who are stationed around various punching bags. Each accesses what’s bothering her, and with each punch releases and transforms it. These women are taking back their power with each punch. They are training in resilience. It’s something we can all cultivate, this capacity to quickly bounce back from adversity.
Resilience allows us to stay strong and in balance in the face of life’s challenges.
and fail. You are going to get knocked down; you can choose to let them knock you out, or you can learn how to get back up and figure out how to make your next move. Practicing resilience in the ring can be a great way to prepare for what punches life throws you and the next steps you take forward.”
Ernst says she developed resilience thanks to parents who believed in her and challenged her to do things that might end in failure. Those lessons changed the trajectory in her life. She now is also pursuing a master’s degree in health psychology to continue to learn the importance of resilience and other ways to connect the mind and body.
Cultivating Resilience
Bouncing Back from Life’s Challenges
BY SHILAGH MIRGAIN
Women are like water, our ideas, creativity and actions need to be constantly fluid and in motion. We are receptive, take in events from life and experience emotions that rise and fall like waves. We assimilate and integrate our experiences and then take action from this place of wisdom.
But the difficulties of life can be a harsh awakening. Pain will come. It often causes our energy to constrict and creates blocks and restrictions in our self-expression. If we’re not taught how to meet life and stay resilient in the midst of the problems we face, our confidence weakens. We hold onto things that aren’t ours to hold onto and give away our power. We can become stagnant, and if we freeze up, we dam up our potential. Having practices in place to protect our life force keeps our sense of self flowing strong.
No one knows this better than Melissa Ernst, who co-founded Canvas Club a year ago after falling in love with boxing as a workout of empowerment, a way to build confidence and as a training ground for life. She wanted to create a space in Madison that attracted a variety of people interested in the physical and mental benefits of boxing, without the contact and grittiness of the sport.
Since opening the gym, she’s had girls as young as 8 and women into their 70s learn the art of boxing. She reflects, “When women step into the ring, they are often out of their comfort zone. They are going to make mistakes and have to try again and again to get a combo sequence right. Nothing comes easy in boxing. And let’s face it, life is the same way. Life is not easy and you are going to get hit
When life gets us down and we are stuck in the muck, how can we learn to pick ourselves back up? It is not by paralysis of analysis. Women are vulnerable to rumination and can spend too much time in their heads hooked by thoughts of upset. We can free ourselves by first feeling what is needed to heal. Allowing and making space for expressing all of our emotions and reactions is the alchemy that transforms upsets into wisdom. Research shows that when people suppress their emotions, they have a diminished sense of wellbeing and feelings that are ignored will erupt often at the worst time. Women are often conditioned to feel sadness and anxiety but to suppress anger. But anger is a great motivator and at its core is our personal power. It is a signal that something’s happening that’s not in our best interest. The energy of anger can be a catalyst for speaking up, setting boundaries and limits and negotiating for change. Boxing and other forms of exercise are one way to safely express and process emotions so we can think more clearly about best next steps.
Resilience is also strengthened through learning life’s lessons. We all have a personal narrative, one that shapes our view on life and ourselves but sometimes our perspective isn’t completely accurate. Putting our experiences on paper through therapeutic
“Practicing resilience in the ring can be a great way to prepare for what punches life throws you and the next steps you take forward.”
-Melissa Ernst
journaling helps us identify thought patterns that don’t serve us. We can rewrite our wrongs by reflecting on what our difficulties teach us, and how we grow and make meaning from mistakes, missteps and misfortunes. We can then write our way to a new ending, one in which we’re the heroine making positive changes in our own life’s story.
Ernst had to redefine what failure meant to her as a female business owner. “We are all going to fail and make mistakes; we are human, but when you can take those mistakes and learn and grow from them you come out a better person who is equipped for new challenges,” Ernst says. “I have learned to find ways to grow through every experience I encounter. My first business venture was a vintage boutique. After a year of business, I decided that it was not where my passion was and it was not a viable business. That year was the best education I could have asked for and I didn’t lose my entrepreneurial spirit from that business failure. I saw it as a stepping block and learning experience that allowed me to get to where I am today.”
Ernst also has found that community is key. “There are so many talented women business leaders in Madison. I make sure to surround myself with other business owners and mentors who can encourage me when I come across an obstacle or when something doesn’t go as planned.”
We all need a circle of support we can turn to regularly for strength. There is a certain kind of protection that comes from a deep sense of being loved and valued.
The Zulus have a greeting, “Sawubona,” that translates roughly into “I see you, and by seeing you I bring you into being.” People who see past our limitations, our weaknesses, our vulnerabilities to our larger potential are the companions for life. What they mirror back to us helps us see past our struggles for today and shows us the hope for tomorrow.
Ernst says, “The most important way I promote resilience in my own life is through serving and sharing God’s love. Learning to put others before yourself changes the way you live. Understanding that there are others around me who need support and seeing how they come through tough times encourages me to keep going.”
And that is the treasure we find after growing through difficult times into greater resilience. We remember who we are and what we came here to do. We access the part of us that is unhookable, unbreakable and indestructible. We gain a certain kind of tenacity and a sense of wholeness we can use to make a difference by speaking up boldly, taking action bravely and enacting the brilliant changes we wish to see in the world.
CONVERSATIONS WITH AGING PARENTS
IT’S NEVER TOO SOON TO TALK ABOUT THE FUTURE
BY JEN BRADLEY
It’s sometimes hard to grasp the fact that as we age, so do the ones who have cared for us our entire lives. At what point do the caregivers become the ones needing care? The circle of life is a reality, but that doesn’t mean it’s an easy one to accept or manage.
The frank talks we must have with aging loved ones sometimes can creep up so fast they take our breath away. Family homes must be sold, belongings moved to a new place and changes made in what seems like an instant. Local professionals weigh in on how to make these conversations happen earlier and easier and, in turn, make the outcomes a lot happier.
THE EARLIER THE BETTER
It’s really never too soon to sit down with loved ones and talk about life after retirement and beyond, says Beth Johnson, marketing representative from Oakwood Village. “We encourage families to have this discussion when there is time to plan, research and involve your parent(s) in the decision. Too many families wait until there is a crisis.” Local professionals agree that a crisis is the most stressful time to have difficult conversations about money, living arrangements, additional care and even hospice. Part of this stress comes from a loved one potentially having their input taken out of the equation, for a variety of reasons, such as severe illness. “A crisis changes your options,” explains
Krista McCook, the chief operating officer for Mosaic Management Group, which owns and operates 11 Artisan senior living facilities in Wisconsin. “If you can make changes sooner, hopefully a loved one can be in a situation that will help them age well for a longer time.”
Jennifer Klug, regional director of customer relations at Oak Park Place, agrees that maintaining a high quality of life is crucial, and says it’s essential to ask a loved one what life experiences they feel they are missing as they age such as driving in the evening or playing with card clubs. Klug says senior communities offer dinners with neighbors, music and art opportunities, and so many others. She explains many seniors say they experience greater independence in a retirement community than when they were living alone.
Another signal to arrange a talk about what comes next is when a family member notices changes in their loved one, whether physical, mental, social or emotional. Klug says that differences in normal appearance and lack of personal hygiene are warning signs. So are spoiled food in the refrigerator, medications gone untouched or undone laundry. It’s helpful to consider what that person’s “normal” is, she says, and caregivers can often pick up on those signs.
Johnson adds that another indication for help is when one parent is caring for the other, and that responsibility is taking a toll on them physically, mentally or emotionally. “Then it’s time to take action,” she adds. “Likewise if a parent is feeling lonely and isolated, or their mobility is dramatically decreasing, this would be a good time to talk also.”
When the time does come, families will realize that “if” becomes a “when” and “how.” Cheri Milton, Agrace HospiceCare’s community grief specialist, says that in the perfect world, dialogue has been happening all along, planting seeds which will be there at the necessary time. She offers an example of what she calls a courageous son who initiated to his siblings during a family reunion that they needed to talk. Their father had been diagnosed with a terminal condition, and Milton says the family was surprised and thrilled that the patriarch actually did want to discuss things, but was scared to bring it up himself.
“Our loved ones often want to talk about things,” she says. “They know they are getting older, things are changing, maybe they are facing some serious health concerns. Often, everyone is trying to protect everybody else. The son said you could visibly see the relief on his dad’s face.”
WHO TO INCLUDE IN THESE CONVERSATIONS?
It’s important to decide who to involve in family meetings and ongoing conversations about an aging loved one’s care,
experts say. When it comes to talking about money, though, Colleen Johnson and Ed Kindschi, senior vice presidents at Johnson Bank Wealth Management and Johnson Bank, respectively, know that things can get complicated.
“All the siblings obviously have a vested interest in whatever remains in the end,” says Kindschi. “But when it comes to paying cost of living increases for mom or compensating a sibling for caregiving, that’s where it gets difficult.”
He says he recently had a discussion with a family on just this topic, and he reiterates that it’s never too early to start the conversation. Kindschi says this is even more imperative if a loved one has memory loss and needs to choose someone to take on financial power of attorney.
McCook agrees, saying that cognitive function in a person with memory care needs will decrease and affect their problem-solving abilities. “It limits their participation in the conversation and you want them to be involved in the plans for their future,” McCook notes.
She also says that family members should be involved to the extent they can and want to be. If a relative lives far away, it might be beneficial to schedule a meeting with siblings and parents (if that time has come) when they are in town. Other times, the long-distance relative may need time for a “reality check” of the situation as it is, not how he or she may think it to be.
“I think that makes a big difference,” McCook says of the time spent in observation. “But everyone should be invited to participate in the discussion, though they may not want to be involved at the same degree.”
And, adds Johnson from Oakwood Village, siblings should also be aware of not “ganging up” on their parents and causing a more challenging situation. Agrace’s Milton agrees. “They may not have real clarity initially because this is not something they ever wanted to think about,” she says in reference to hospice care.
No matter what, all agree that concrete change is dependent on the person’s personality or temperament. Some aging family members may be far more resistant to change than others. McCook adds: “Change is scary. Find out what they are afraid of, and then have a real conversation instead of just saying they need to make a change.”
WHERE TO HAVE THIS CONVERSATION
Location for and timing of these crucial conversations are important. Think of when your best time of day is, and where you are most comfortable. Our loved ones have the same idiosyncrasies and it’s much easier to adapt to theirs when this time comes. Klug recommends planning ahead. “As adult children, this
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becomes a role reversal and it’s not always easy,” she says, and notes that many adult caregivers are also in the sandwich generation, raising children of their own. “They’re used to telling their kids what to do, but talking to parents can be difficult.”
McCook says eliminating distractions and prior obligations is important when choosing a time and location. “Don’t do this during a big family function or when you have a bunch of other appointments that day,” she says. “That’s not the time. You should set aside a specific time.”
She recommends talking during normal visiting periods. For example, McCook says she visited her parents every Sunday when they were alive and that would be a good time to broach delicate topics. They were expecting her anyway and it was a comfortable, easy-going physical and mental space for everyone.
Milton agrees wholeheartedly and says that nothing should be done “willy-nilly” in the pressure of a moment. “Schedule a time,” she stresses. “It can sound very administrative and organized, but we know these are very emotional conversations for families.”
HOW TO START
Milton offers some great advice on where to start these tough conversations, especially when they include discussions about hospice care. She suggests caregivers “depersonalize” the situation initially. By this, she means mentioning something interesting you’ve learned about hospice and asking a loved one if they had ever heard that, or talking about a mutual friend whose family member is needing hospice care. “Say something like: ‘Boy, mom, when and if that would ever happen to you, what are your thoughts?”
Johnson, from Oakwood Village, says a good way to approach a difficult conversation is by simply talking to loved ones about their future. “Where do they see themselves living in the next year, three years or five years from now? Have they thought about how and where to get support if they need help?” She says general questions are much easier to start with as they are less intimidating and not asking a parent to make a specific decision.
Klug advises to, above all, listen to a loved one. “Hear how they are feeling,” she recommends. “What are their concerns and what’s important to them? Are they worried about leaving home and why? Is it the markings on the wall where the kids grew each year?” What makes them nostalgic about staying put?
McCook and the financial advisers at Johnson Bank suggest families look to professional resources for help if they feel the conversation may get tricky or their loved ones may have questions right away. “The family might choose to meet with a financial adviser or elder law
attorney to start the discussion around finances and health, and begin to set a plan for costs related to care,” says Johnson from Johnson Bank. Her colleague, Kindschi, agrees. “We’re not making personal care decisions, that’s up to the family,” he reassures, but adds that in tough conversations that third-party can help deflect emotions, offer ideas and insight, as well as take some pressure off individual family members. “This may be the first time that the family is going through something like this, but chances are their adviser has dealt with it and guided other families numerous times.”
WHAT IS THE GOAL?
By and large, the professionals concur, the goal of any initial conversation is information gathering. Johnson, from Oakwood Village, says that loved ones’ preferences and options should be discussed. Where would they like to stay if things change? Do they want to be relocated? How about visiting some senior care facilities in the area just to learn about choices for if/when the time comes?
She adds that in Madison, waiting lists are common. “If a parent is not interested in moving, it’s just sometimes better to get on a waiting list because there is no pressure to move and they are better prepared to if they have seen a few communities and choose one that feels most comfortable.”
Klug says that it’s essential that caregivers let loved ones know they are there to support them, but also see there is a need. She says families need to explain that they will be strong for them through the process, and also reinforce that it’s the right decision. “You truly must support them and understand their needs, wants and desires throughout the multiple conversations.”
McCook agrees, and says that loved ones and caregivers need to work together, and these first conversations are good for fact finding, but a plan should always be in place for what the next step is going to be. Ask them: “What’s working? What isn’t? What are some of the challenges?”
She says that there’s usually something driving this conversation and there may be an immediate need that can be addressed with a short-term plan, with a longer-term solution in mind. She says that a goal of the first conversations is also not to put loved ones on the defense.
She also says that it’s important to empower loved ones during this time, maybe talking about challenges they’ve faced previously in life and how they navigated other transitions. “Tell them they were successful in those situations and maybe they could share why,” she says. “Then ask: ‘What are some things we can do to help you with this transition?”
Important issues, like health care and finances, matter to your parents as much as they do to you. Our experienced advisors can help you begin the conversation, while designing your financial plan to help care for your loved ones as they grow older.
As a privately-held, family-owned business, we provide a full range of financial services to individuals, families and businesses. Our team of experts will consider all aspects of your financial life, offering objective advice so you can focus on what matters most – your family. Call us today to find out how we can provide guidance and help you achieve your goals.
Johnson adds that if a parent is reluctant to chat about difficult topics, she says it works to say that “they are helping you/ doing you a favor.” For parents who insist they are doing just fine, this might be a way to achieve cooperation, she explains. She also recommends talking to parents at least a year in advance of a potential move. And if the children see their parents regularly, Johnson says this conversation will unfold naturally, over time and with less stress than a crisis situation.
CHANGE STARTS WITH THE FIRST STEP
Klug, of Oak Park Place, says the best way to initiate change is by incremental steps.
“Agree to talk more about it. Agree to take some tours. Agree to have dinner with some residents. Agree to do it as a trial. It needs to make sense to them and they should get to be a big part of the decision.”
In terms of financial decisions, Kindschi and Johnson from Johnson Bank say it’s a good idea to have certain family members have specific responsibilities.
“Everyone should have a backup plan and have someone that is informed of where documents are, where belongings are, who’s in charge should something happen, etc.,” says Johnson. Milton says she repeats herself over and over again, but it bears repeating once more: “People want to talk about things more than we ever can imagine. Once they do, whether they wanted to or not, 99 percent of the time, everyone involved is so glad they did. It might be hard to jump into, but they are so glad they did.”
Klug has seen the same thing. She also adds that it might have been years since someone lived in an apartment, if at all. “It’s a big change and it’s exciting too,” Klug adds. “We often hear people say they wish they’d done it sooner. I think the hardest part is just making the decision to do it. Once they do, they see all the benefits.”
Johnson concludes with these thoughts: “It’s important for both the parent and child to keep in mind that one of the best reasons to have a conversation is so that a child can help their parent live safely and happily. It’s a wonderful way for everyone to be prepared in case of a health care emergency.” Emotions may be high through any of these conversations, but likely will be even more so when decisions must be made fast. “It’s really never too soon,” she says.
IMPORTANT QUESTIONS TO ASK AGING LOVED ONES
Use this checklist, pulled together with advice from the experts featured in this story, to start those crucial conversations with aging loved ones when it’s time to consider their financial and health care choices, retirement living arrangements and end-of-life wishes.
RETIREMENT LIVING QUESTIONS
What do you like about living at home?
What’s going really well?
What is a typical day like for you now?
What makes you happy?
What does quality of life mean to you right now, at this point in your life?
What is becoming difficult or more challenging?
I’ve noticed [insert your observation of what you see them struggling with]. What do you think about that? How are you doing with it? If we could do something to help what would it be?
What’s most important to you, in terms of your new home location and amenities such as underground parking, available activities, etc.?
What do you miss now due to your limitations, such as hobbies, social opportunities, etc.?
What are your concerns about making a move?
HEALTH CARE AND FINANCIAL QUESTIONS
Do you have health care and financial power of attorney documents? How can we access them?
Are your signed HIPPA forms on file with your doctors’ offices? Do they allow your family to access your medical information?
Have you given your children or executor(s) copies of health insurance cards, prescription coverage cards and Medicare cards?
Have you shared financial information and status with at least one child or holder of the power of attorney?
For those moving from out of state: Have you or your caregivers contacted the health care insurance company to understand what needs to be addressed?
When the time comes that you are nearing the end of your life, do you have specific ideas about what you would or would not want in terms of care or treatment, etc.?
How can I/we reassure you that we will honor and respect your wishes both now and in the future?
ADDITIONAL TIPS FOR CHILDREN/ EXECUTORS
It’s never too early to begin the discussion about care needs and your loved ones’ desires and wishes.
Be sure to review the estate plan and corresponding legal documents to ensure wishes can be executed, including a will/trust agreement, financial power of attorney, health care power of attorney and living will/ advanced directives.
Review investment portfolios both long-term and short-term to ensure liquidity for increased care expenses.
Discuss and review who will be responsible for coordinating bills, tax returns, and other daily expenses.
DRINKS
TOAST OF THE TOWN
Join BRAVA for a festive Power Happy Hour and celebrate the journeys and successes of BRAVA Women to Watch past and present. We say cheers to wrap up this year’s THRIVE Conference on April 28 at The Edgewater. For details and to register: thrivewithbrava.com.
Plan a crawl of not-to-miss happy hour locales around Madison using this month’s EATS + DRINKS, P. 72.
SALUD! MADISON’S HAPPY HOUR GEMS
BY RACHEL WERNER
SAVORING THE HAPPIEST of hours around Madtown can be an epic quest. And the following locales are worth an after-hours crawl any day of the week, serving up affordable and inventive spreads, a welcoming vibe and a good cocktail, or two.
Alchemy
An intimate, hipster and a cash-only establishment, Alchemy is a true townie stop on Madison’s near East Side. Mostly known for its locally sourced micro-menu, this café serves up one inexpensive house cocktail, along with discounted tap brews and half-price
PHOTOGRAPHED BY KAIA CALHOUN (TOP LEFT), PHOTOS COURTESY
ROMAN
CANDLE
small plates. One not-to-miss nosh is The Batch Bakehouse Grilled Bread—delivered sliced, toasted and paired with rotating selections of creamy pâtés like parmesan leek. alchemycafe.net.
DLUX
Glam meets diner at DLUX. Though the interior screams metropolitan thanks to the sleek illuminated surfaces and the semi-circular booths obviously designed to hold three gals (along with five of their besties), the food is full-on comfort from the alcohol-infused milkshakes to quarter-inch thick burgers to one of the most playful happy hour combos on the Capitol Square—Spuds and Sparkles, a $6 tater tot and sparkling wine pairing.
“I LIKE TO HAVE FUN WITH THE HAPPY HOUR DISHES I CREATE— TAKING TRADITIONAL BAR FOOD LIKE WINGS AND INFUSING THEM WITH SOMETHING UNEXPECTED, LIKE WISCONSIN MAPLE SYRUP, SHERRY VINEGAR AND GOCHUJAN.” -CHEF JOE HEPPE, THE EDGEWATER.
Of happy hours here, says Food Fight Chief Creative Officer Caitlin Suemnicht, “expect creative drinks and tasty appetizers in a modern, trendy setting. The large square-shaped bar in the center of the room is a great setting for bantering with bartenders and people watching, and during warm weather months our patio with a Capitol view is always bustling.” dluxmadison.com.
Augie’s Tavern
Bathe in elegance accentuated by a killer view of Lake Mendota at Augie’s Tavern in The Edgewater Hotel. Hosting happy hour every day—even on Sundays—a daily classic cocktail such as a Sidecar or a Manhattan nicely complements the flavors of Executive Chef Joe Heppe’s nibbles.
“I like to have fun with the happy hour dishes I create—taking traditional bar food like wings and infusing them with something unexpected, like Wisconsin maple syrup, sherry vinegar and gochujang,” he explains. “The oysters offer a bit of nostalgia, throwing it back to oyster dishes featured on Edgewater menus from the 1950s and ’60s and the Augie’s Burger is a great opportunity to feature local purveyors by including an aged cheddar from Hook’s, Stalzy’s Deli breads and beef from Fox Heritage Farms.” theedgewater.com.
Roman Candle
Located on lower Monroe Street, the newest neighborhood lounge of the popular pizzeria chain The Roman Candle features a big ash bar (made from ash trees reclaimed from Emerald Ash Borer sites), big screen TVs and urban décor throughout. Although still quite family-friendly, it’s the most grown-up Roman Candle yet with 21 craft taps, including five tap lines dedicated to small batch cocktails and the generous pour of premium spirits in every drink. The cocktails are also delivered in jars and dubbed with trendy monikers like PaLoMo, a strong tequila punch, and the delish pear mule Monroe Doctrine.
“We have taken inspiration from our ‘Culture of Crust’ ethos,” says owner Brewer Stouffer, “and we make everything from scratch by squeezing the citrus, making our own syrups and sour mix, and using fresh botanicals. This is our first location to go all-in on the casual bar. We’ve taken it to the next level.” theromancandle.com.
Thank goodness it’s 5 o’clock somewhere!
AUTOMOTIVE PREVIEW
2017 ALFA ROMEO GULIA
Alfa Romeo has always taken a unique and innovative approach to designing automobiles; it is the point of convergence between design and passion, between a love for the most cutting-edge technology and a strong instinct to inspire emotions. Today, Alfa Romeo is writing a new chapter in its history, introducing a future where once again the driver is at the center of the design.
Here is the Alfa Romeo Giulia.
Alfa Romeo and Fiat of Madison 5739 Tokay Blvd., Madison (888) 230-1612 fiatusaofmadison.com
2017 JEEP COMPASS
The all-new 2017 Compass presents a captivating perspective on authentic capability. With its head-turning design, rightsized luxury and intuitive technology, Compass travels its own distinctive path. Where can you go from here?
The answer is simple: everywhere.
Don Miller Dodge, Chryser, Jeep, Ram 5802 Odana Rd., Madison (888) 466-1138
donmillerdodgechryslerjeep.com
2017 SUBARU IMPREZA
Ready to go all out, the all-new 2017 Impreza is built to last, protect and get you where you want to go. Both the sedan and 5-door Impreza boast bold new designs, upgraded interiors with new STARLINK™ Multimedia technology, and more advanced features to help you stay safe. Plus, with standard Subaru Symmetrical All-Wheel Drive and now up to 38 highway MPG you’re free to go nearly anywhere you want. Impreza. More than a car, it’s a Subaru.
Don Miller Subaru West 5822 Odana Rd., Madison (888) 485-0531 donmillersubaruwest.com
Don Miller Subaru East 5339 Wayne Terrace., Madison (888) 478-0996 donmillersubarueast.com
AUTOMOTIVE PREVIEW
THOSE WHO DEFY LABELS DEFINE THEMSELVES
At MINI of Madison, you’ll find a welcoming environment full of brightly colored MINI Coopers, an award winning service team and a passionate group of Motoring Advisors ready to help you. Your dream MINI is waiting.
Please meet Alicia Stevenson, one of our top Motoring Advisors. “I love meeting new people, hearing their stories and helping them find the best car to fit their needs. It is such an honor to be here.”
Lisa Stoffer, also a rock star Motoring Advisor, loves taking guests on test drives. “The feeling that best describes driving a MINI would be flying! You are in complete control, it holds to the ground and glides around each corner.”
Kristin Williams, a member of our finance department, has been in the automotive industry for nearly thirteen years so understands the what the customer is looking for. "Putting together your financial options is just as personal as picking out the right vehicle. I love to help our guests find the right financial fit to go with the right vehicle."
MINI of Madison invites you to start motoring today!
LEFT TO RIGHT: LISA STOFFER, ALICIA STEVENSON, KRISTIN WILLIAMS
Zimbrick Chevrolet
1877 W. Main St. Sun Prairie (608) 729-6713
zimbrickchevrolet.com
LET KATIE SARAC AT ZIMBRICK CHEVROLET FIND YOU THE PERFECT NEW OR USED CAR– AT THE BEST PRICE GUARANTEED.
As a working mom Katie understands, you don’t have much time to car shop. “You can learn a lot online, but you need to drive a vehicle to know if it really fits your needs. I’m here to provide the most effective test drive and answer questions.”
Katie recommends you bring along any car seats or booster seats you plan to use in your new car. “It will help you get a better feel for the space you will have for your family. If you have any concerns over space for strollers, or any other gear, bring that too.”
At Zimbrick Chevrolet you’ll get the Best Price Guaranteed. “We will beat any written offer, or pay you $500 on any new Chevrolet,” Katie explains. “The guarantee saves you time and money.”
KATIE SARAC SALES CONSULTANT
APRIL
EVENTS
PERFORMING ARTS
THROUGH APRIL 8 | TIMES VARY
“LADY AT EMERSON’S BAR AND GRILL”
The time is 1959, the place is a seedy bar in Philadelphia, and the audience is about to witness one of Billie Holiday’s last performances before her death. Wisconsin Studio, Overture Center, Madison. capitalcitytheatre.org.
THROUGH APRIL 9 | TIMES VARY “LEARNING TO STAY”
Elise is thrilled when her husband Brad returns home from Iraq, but it soon becomes clear he is no longer a man she recognizes. This world-premiere play was adapted by Jim DeVita from the novel of the same name by Erin Cellelo. The Playhouse, Overture Center Madison. forwardtheater.org.
7-9 | TIMES VARY COLOSSAL PIANO
Experience the talents of brilliant French pianist Philippe Bianconi as he joins the Madison Symphony Orchestra for pieces by Rachmaninoff and more. Overture Hall, Madison. overture.org.
21-23 | TIMES VARY
“THE MAGIC FLUTE”
A prince, a princess, a bird-catcher and a host of fascinating characters take audiences into a world of charmed musical instruments. Overture Hall, Madison. madisonopera.org.
21-30 | TIMES VARY “THE NANCE”
Chauncey Miles is a gay burlesque comedian in this broad comedy that brilliantly depicts the time when it was easy to play gay—but dangerous to be gay. The Bartell, Madison. madisontheatreguild.org.
22-30 | TIMES VARY
“TO THE PROMISED LAND”
Children’s Theater of Madison performs the story of a young African-American girl’s experience growing up in civil rights era Milwaukee overlapped with the story of Golda Meir, future prime minister of Israel. The Playhouse, Overture Center, Madison. overture.org.
22 | 8 P.M.
LOS ANGELES GUITAR QUARTET
With 14 albums, a Grammy Award for Best Classical Crossover CD, and sold-out performances, this group is a musical force. Wisconsin Union Theater, Madison. union.wisc.edu.
28 | 7:30 P.M.
MASTERWORKS V
Former Madisonians and duo pianists Jessica Chow and Michael Shinn will join for an evening of Ravel, Tom Cabaniss and Schumann. Capitol Theater, Madison. wisconsinchamberorchestra.org.
29 | 8 P.M.
ITZHAK PERLMAN
Beloved for his charm and humanity, this reigning virtuoso of the violin is treasured by audiences around the world. Overture Hall, Madison. overture.org.
30 | 7:30 P.M.
THE BEACH BOYS
To these guys, the beach isn’t a place where the surf comes to play—it’s where life is renewed and made whole again. Overture Hall, Madison. overture.org.
30 | 7:30 P.M.
LEA SALONGA
Tony-winning soprano Salonga is the voice of Mulan, the singing voice of Princess Jasmine, and known for her role as Eponine in “Les Miserables.” Wisconsin Union Theater, Madison. union.wisc.edu.
ENTERTAINMENT
THROUGH APRIL 6 | TIMES VARY UW-MADISON’S WISCONSIN FILM FESTIVAL
Watch the year’s best films up close including “The Salesman,” “My Life as a Zucchini,” and “Things to Come.” UW Madison Art Institute, Madison. 2017.wifilmfest.org.
4 | 7:30 P.M.
RHINOS, RICKSHAWS AND REVOLUTIONS: MY SEARCH FOR TRUTH
Photojournalist Ami Vitale has lived in mud huts, traveled via rickshaw and donned a panda suit to live the story. Capitol Theater, Madison. overture.org.
7-9 | TIMES VARY
KANOPY DANCE PRESENTS “SNAPSHOTS OF SPAIN”
Celebrate the beauty and influence of Spain through contemporary dance. Featuring acclaimed Flamenco dancer Danica Sena. Overture Hall, Madison. overture.org.
FUN
Camp Anokijig anokijig.com (920) 893-0873
Kanopy Dance School kanopydance.org (608) 238-4642
Kids Express Learning Center Summer on the Farm kidsexpress.com (608) 845-3245
MSCR mscr.org (608) 204-3000
Madison Country Day School madisoncountryday. org (608) 850-6000
Rainbow Child Care Center rainbowccc.com (800) 90-LEARN
auburnreadingcenter.com kim@auburnreadingcenter.com We
Dance
Ages
Ages
8 | 7:30 P.M.
UW RUSSIAN FOLK ORCHESTRA
Experience the magic of Russian and Eastern European folk music, featuring authentic instruments, ballerinas and domras. Mead Witter School of Music, Madison. russorch.wisc.edu.
15 | 11 A.M.
MADTOWN AUTHOR DAZE
Meet authors of your favorite fiction, nonfiction and children’s books during this inaugural sale and signing event. Madison Museum of Contemporary Art, Madison. sunmoonarts.com.
18 | 12:15 P.M.
THE WISCONSIN HOMEFRONT DURING WORLD WAR I
Listen as Leslie Bellais, curator of social history, discusses how Wisconsinites experienced the homefront during World War 1. Wisconsin Historical Museum, Madison. wisconsinhistory.org.
20 | 8 P.M.
KING SUNNY ADE AND HIS AFRICAN BEATS
Witness one of the most influential musicians of modern world music. Wisconsin Union Theater, Madison. union.wisc.edu./eventsand-activities/event-calendar.
21-23 | 8 A.M.
38 th ANNUAL MIDWEST HORSE FAIR
Attend one of the nation’s largest three-day horse fairs, showcasing a variety of breeds and over 500 vendor booths. Alliant Energy Center, Madison. midwesthorsefair.com.
28 | 8:15 P.M. MANHOLE SKETCH COMEDY
This troupe performs original, comedic sketches in a fun night of laughter. Wisconsin Union Theater, Madison. union.wisc.edu.
FAMILY
1 | TIMES VARY KIDS IN THE ROTUNDA – TAIWAN PUPPETS
Experience Madison’s celebrated troupe as it showcases “Glove Puppet,” a cornerstone of Taiwanese performance art. Overture Hall, overture.org.
1-2 | 9:30 A.M.
UW MADISON SCIENCE EXPEDITIONS
Discover all the science resources UWMadison has to offer through interactive exploration stations on topics from astronomy to zoology. Discovery Building, Madison. science.wisc.edu.
READ(Y) TO WEAR
Support in style at this fashion inspired benefit for Madison Reading Project, a nonprofit that supplies books and literacy programs to vulnerable children in our communities. The event features a fashion show and panel of judges along with music, hors d’oeuvres and cocktails from Yahara Bay Distillery. April 29, 6:30 p.m. Yahara Bay Distillery, Fitchburg. madisonreadingproject.com.
2 | TIMES VARY
EARTH’S DINOSAUR ZOO LIVE
It’s the ultimate play date—65 million years in the making. Observe, meet and interact with an eye-popping collection of life-like dinosaurs and other creatures. Capitol Theater, Madison. overture.org.
2 | 1 P.M.
KID’S ART ADVENTURES
Let kids create their own sculptures inspired by the 2017 “Young at Art” exhibition. Madison Museum of Contemporary Art, Madison. mmoca.org.
14| 10 A.M.
HAMMER TIME!
Enable kids to learn the craft of woodworking, safely supervised by museum staff. Madison Children’s Museum, Madison. madisonchildrensmuseum.org.
15 | 10 A.M.
COTTONTAIL CLASSIC
Make Easter memorable at the Cottontail Classic, a 10K run and 5K run/walk that includes a pancake breakfast and Easter egg hunt. McGaw Park, Fitchburg. cottontailclassicrun.com.
22 | 9:30 A.M.
CELEBRATE EARTH DAY. THE RIGHT WAY.
Join American Family Insurance’s sustainability team for a morning of fun and creativity making recycled bird feeders for the kids to take home. dreamfearlessly.com/dreambank/events/.
SAVOR
2 | 3 P.M.
FEED THE NEED TASTING EVENT
Sample and savor food and drink by Madison Originals and Ale Asylum Brewing to benefit The River Food Pantry. Madison College Culinary Facility, Madison. riverfoodpantry.org.
8 | 9 A.M.
MIDWEST GOURD FEST
Learn all about gourds via vendors and classes. The festival also offers live music and art competitions. Olbrich Botanical Gardens, Madison. americangourdsociety.org.
15 | 6:15 A.M.
DANE COUNTY FARMERS’ MARKET
Embrace spring at the opening day of the much-loved farmers’ market on Capitol Square. Downtown Madison. dcfm.org.
28-30 | TIMES VARY CRAFT BEER WEEK
Experience Dane County’s vibrant craft beer scene during the opening weekend of this 10-day festival. Locations vary, Dane County isthmus.com.
JAUNT
THROUGH 23 | 2 P.M. CAVALIA ODYSSEO
Experience the world’s largest touring production and witness a fusion of equestrian arts, stage arts and high-tech theatrical effects incorporating 65 horses and 48 performers. Soldier Field, Chicago. cavalia.com.
7-9 | TIMES VARY RIVER FALLS ROOTS + BLUE GRASS FESTIVAL
Explore the range of Blue Grass music through vendors, workshops and jam sessions in River Fall’s historic district. Downtown River Falls. riverfallsbluegrass.com.
8 | 5 P.M.
GITCHEE GUMEE BREW FEST
Taste beers from over 30 craft brewers from Wisconsin, Minnesota, Michigan, Illinois and Iowa. UW Superior, Superior. ggbrewfest.com
14-16 | 10 A.M.
GLOW QUEST UNDERGROUND EGGS HUNT
Search for over 300 glowing Easter eggs along the colorfully lighted Meanders passage. Cave of the Mounds, Blue Mounds. caveofthemounds.com.
22 | 1 P.M.
CRAFT BREWS AND CHICAGO BLUES FESTIVAL
Savor unlimited sampling of craft beer and live blues music at this sixth annual event. Geneva National Golf Club, Lake Geneva. brewsandbluesfestival.com.
THRIVE
7 | 12 P.M.
EATING WELL FOR HEALTHY ENERGY + SLEEP
Learn more about effectively using healthy diet and natural medicine to obtain higher energy and deep sleep. Monona Terrace, Madison. mononaterrace.com.
13 | 6:15 P.M.
HOW TO SAY “NO” WITHOUT FEELING GUILTY WITH ANN GARVIN
Bestselling author and health professor Ann Garvin explains saying “no” to the things you don’t value so you can say “yes” to the things you do. DreamBank, Madison. dreamfearlessly.com/dreambank/events/.
27 | 6:15 P.M.
FROM BURNOUT TO BALANCE: THE ART OF SELF-CARE WITH RACHEL WILBERDING
Gain the right tools to better understand your body’s patterns and responses along with simple daily habits functional nutritionist Rachel Wilberding will share to help you beat back the burnout, reclaim your joy—and move from surviving to thriving. DreamBank, Madison. dreamfearlessly.com/dreambank/events/.
30 | 11 A.M.
FAIR WISCONSIN BRUNCH
Enjoy a savory brunch buffet with complimentary cocktails and entertaining program emceed by Tim Sauers of Overture Center for the Arts to benefit Fair Wisconsin Education Fund. Madison Concourse Hotel, Madison. fairwisconsineducationfund.com
Discover the Impact Madison Gives 2017
Madison Community Foundation’s 75th Anniversary annual dinner is a one-time opportunity to celebrate and support the unique natural and cultural assets that make up the precious gems in our community.
Don’t miss the big announcement! We’ll kick off a year of impact by revealing the first of 12 major gifts to the community.
Event and registration details at madisongives.org/events
Tuesday, May 16 · Monona Terrace
5 p.m. Reception · 6 p.m. Dinner and Program
FARM TO
COMMUNITY REAP FOOD GROUP CONNECTS FARMERS WITH CONSUMERS
BY AMY CARLSON NBC 15 NEWS ANCHOR
IT’S A WIN-WIN SITUATION FOR ALL INVOLVED: RESTAURANTS SUPPORT LOCAL FARMERS AND FOOD BUSINESSES WHILE DINERS ENJOY LOCALLY GROWN FOOD THAT SUPPORTS THEIR COMMUNITY.
REAP FOOD GROUP is all about building relationships—between local farmers, school children, restaurant diners and chefs—to grow and sustain a local food system that benefits the entire community.
Its Farm to School snack program is a key part of that mission, bringing local fruits and vegetables to Madison Metropolitan School District students. For some children, it is the only source of fresh fruits and vegetables in their diet.
Helen Sarakinos, REAP’s executive director, still gets excited talking about the partnership between the Madison school district and local farmers. “The school district lets farmers know what produce they need and the farmers grow fruits and vegetables specifically for the Farm to School program,” says Sarakinos.
Local food is also incorporated into the classroom. Students meet the local farmers who grew their produce and learn their food’s route from farm to plate. A special six-week lesson series is led by REAP’s Americorps educators for students in second through fourth grades. Hannah Wente, REAP’s communications director says, “The kids are encouraged to describe the flavors of the food and can vote yum or yuck according to their preference.”
Students also receive hands-on experience from 13 local chefs. The Chef in the Classroom program teaches middle and high school students culinary skills that
APRIL NONPROFIT EVENTS
Dates Vary | Times Vary MOVIES FOR REFUGEES
Open Doors for Refugees is sponsoring three films describing refugee and immigrant experiences. Two films will be screened at the Wisconsin Film Festival, “Stranger in Paradise” and “Abacus: Small Enough to Jail.” The third is a benefit screening of the awardwinning documentary “Fire at Sea,” at the Barrymore Theater. Screenings: wifilmfest. org and barrymorelive.com. Information: opendoorsforrefugees.org.
27 | 11:30 A.M.
PARTNERS FOR CHANGE LUNCHEON
Raise funds and celebrate Madison Urban Ministry’s 44 years of inspiring social good and community investment. Keynote speaker Dane County Circuit Court Judge Everett Mitchell will discuss the Journey Home initiative, which works to prevent prison recidivism. Madison Concourse Hotel, Madison. Tickets emum.org.
can be shared at home or later lead to a culinary career.
REAP’s Buy Fresh, Buy Local program works to build relationships between local farmers and restaurant owners. Last year, local program partners purchased over $4 million in local foods from area growers.
It’s a win-win situation for all involved. Restaurants support local farmers and food businesses while diners enjoy locally grown food that supports their community.
REAP, which stands for Research, Education, Action and Policy on Food Group, has been invigorating the local food community for 20 years.
REAP publishes the Farm Fresh Atlas every March. It lists farms, businesses, organizations, restaurants and farmers’ markets that sell their goods directly to customers in Southern Wisconsin. Each farm listed is family-owned, sustains the land and water resources, treats animals with care, provides safe working conditions and sells Wisconsin products that are grown on their farm.
Pick up your free copy of the 2017 Farm Fresh Atlas from local libraries, Heartland Credit Union branches and grocery stores throughout Southern Wisconsin.
For more information about REAP, visit reapfoodgroup.org.
29 | 9 A.M.
MIDWEST YOUNG ADULT CANCER CONFERENCE
Participate in this free one-day conference designed to bring together young adults who were diagnosed with cancer prior to the age of 40 and their caretakers. The event includes engaging workshops and community resources. Gilda’s Club, Madison. gildasclubmadison.org.
GO RED FOR WOMEN LIGHTING CEREMONY
FEB. 2 | OVERTURE CENTER
Hundreds of women and supportive men attired in red attended the 2017 American Heart Association’s Go Red for Women Lighting Ceremony. BRAVA Magazine’s Michelle Reddington and Kate Bast co-emceed the memorable event sharing important information on women’s heart health and local survivor stories.
MARCH 4-5 | ALLIANT ENERGY CENTER
Over 8,500 visitors “Made Time to Play” at the 2017 Madison Kids Expo! Families enjoyed live dance and martial arts performances, making hands-on crafts and robotics and meeting Dane County Sheriff’s deputies and firefighters. Over 80 exhibitors also hosted activities like bowling, mining for minerals and introducing children to exotic animals and specially trained dogs. Save the date for next year: March 3-4, 2018.
MADISON KIDS EXPO
#RECLAIMBEAUTY | Celebrating the inherent beauty in every person—just as they are—the Reclaim Beauty project is a time capsule of truth and life rendered in myriad human forms. Founder and 2017 Woman to Watch Kyira Hauer is expanding the visually driven movement via community partnerships and workshops, including the upcoming “Already Enough: Yoga for Every Body, As They Are,” with Nikki Cook Yoga on April 1. Express Yourself, Madison. kindakreative.com. Hauer will speak at BRAVA’s THRIVE Conference April 28. Details on P. 45.
