We do not create our destiny; we participate in its unfolding By Naida Nuñez THIS STORY IS NOT FOR THE FAINT-HEARTED. WHERE I AM NOW, IS A PLACE I DIDN’T EXPECT TO BE IN 10 YRS AGO. LET’S BEGIN FROM WHEN I WAS BORN. IT WAS IN 1989 OF FEBRUARY, MY BIOLOGICAL MUM COULDN’T PAY FOR US TO BE RELEASED FROM THE HOSPITAL, AND 2 DAYS LATER, SOMEONE ELSE HAD TO STEP IN TO TAKE ME, AND RAISE ME AS HER OWN. I only found out about my biological mum when I was 13. I was doing so well in school. I loved school. I loved making everyone proud, and luckily, it was extremely easy to do. My mum decided to tell me the truth since I was a curious kid; I had so many questions. I asked for my birth certificate one day, and she got scared that I would find out that the woman who gave birth to me had a different name. Everyone knew that the mum who raised me, wasn’t my real mum. Everyone knew but me.
I felt betrayed; to realise that you have been living a lie, and be lied to by the people you thought was supposed to be family is something that was tough for a 13 year old. But what can I do, right? Even though at the time, I felt worthless, it felt as though the world came crashing down, I was grateful to be saved, fed, clothed, given an education, a home.
At that time, all I wanted was to find answers. Why? Why was I abandoned? I rebelled against the family who raised me. I went looking for a family or just someone, who wouldn’t lie to me, someone who will make me forget the betrayal, to not feel the pain. I didn’t do drugs or anything like that in case you’re wondering. But my quest led me to fall for the wrong men. I wanted so much to create a family to call my own. I wanted so much to prove to myself, that not everyone you love will lie to you, not everyone is going to leave you. Someone out there is going to choose you. I was once told, “Stop looking, they probably don’t even care about you”. That hurts. Heaps. I don’t believe what people say, because the trust issue that I have is soul-deep. I felt the need to find answers and get them straight away. But, we don’t get answers when we want to and how we want to. We get them when we least expect them. I ended up creating my own family, which is something I’ve always wanted to do in the first place, however, I had to take all the responsibilities that came with it. I found my biological family, they weren’t what I expected them to be.
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| MUMPRENEUR MOVEMENT
