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September 2019 • Free

THE DECLINE IN YOUTH SPORTS What's causing it and how do we fix it?

Mastering the Work-From-Home Juggling Act 6 tips for achieving balance

Social Media Smarts

Advice for college sports recruits


September Festivals for Families | SEPTEMBER 2019


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From the early stages of planning to the day your baby is born, UNC Health Care is your trusted partner for the journey into motherhood. By offering a full range of expert services, from midwifery to maternal-fetal medicine, we specialize in providing expecting moms the personalized and world-class care they desire and deserve. Start your family with the utmost confidence.





THE DECLINE IN YOUTH SPORTS What’s causing it and how do we fix it?

19 MASTERING THE WORK-FROMHOME JUGGLING ACT Triangle parents share six tips for balancing work and life



22 SOCIAL MEDIA SMARTS Advice for how athletes can create a positive online presence that works to their advantage






September Online




Editor’s Note

24 Growing Up

34 Our Picks

40 Faces and Places

25 Oh, Baby!

35 Festivals


26 Understanding Kids

37 Daily



10 Education

27 Raising Readers 28 Tech Talk



29 College Transitions



30 Father Figuring 32 Excursion | SEPTEMBER 2019


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2 Themes — 2 Approaches



his month we focus on two themes: work-life balance and youth sports. While there are common threads and concepts shared by both, covering them required two distinctly different approaches. One focuses on you; the other focuses on your child. Working from home is something many — if not all — of you probably have experienced. According to a 2018 U.S. Department of Labor Bureau of Labor Statistics survey, 23% of workers spent some time working from home during an average workday that year. “Mastering the Work-From-Home Juggling Act” by Layla Khoury-Hanold on page 19 offers tips from three Triangle parents who spend most of their workdays in home offices. I also work from home occasionally so I can relate to — and appreciate — these tips. My favorite: set boundaries. Khoury-Hanold writes: “Having a designated workspace is key to work-fromhome success.” I completely agree! When you do go into the office, what do you wear? Many companies encourage a business-casual dress code. In FYI Style on page 14, Helen Banzet Wallace pulls together several styles and offers tips for achieving classic business-casual looks. Shifting gears to our second theme, we address what appears to be a decrease in youth sports participation across the country. “The Decline in Youth Sports” by Dave Herpy on page 16 reveals that the number of youth ages 6-12 who play sports is down by almost 8% from 2008. Herpy explores possible causes — one of which could very well be … you. In addition to cost and specialization, parental pressure on young athletes may be having the opposite effect of what parents intend. As a parent

Katie Reeves ·


Beth Shugg ·


Janice Lewine ·


Sean W. Byrne ·

of youth athletes, this feature helped me understand the youth sports lessons we parents should accept and confront. Parents of athletes who hope to play their sport in college should check out “Social Media Smarts” by Kurt Dusterberg on page 22. In this feature, coaches and social media experts help athletes understand colleges’ expectations for how potential recruits should manage their online presence. They also offer tips for what to avoid posting and how athletes can use social media to their advantage. Our columns this month address building a better morning routine (page 24), how infant seats might negatively affect your baby’s ability to sit up on her own (page 25), how to help a child adjust to a parent returning to work (page 26), books that celebrate youth sports (page 27), social media lessons from a former college athlete (page 28), whether or not resumes should be submitted with college applications (page 29) and how a local dad barely made it through his youth sports days (page 30). Our Excursion column on page 32 takes you to historic Reed Gold Mine in Cabarrus County. This makes a fun day trip for the entire family! Fall officially begins Sept. 23, so be sure to check out our calendar for fun ways to enjoy the outdoors with your family. And please continue to send us your story ideas. We love hearing from you and strive to cover subjects that are important to you and your children.


Beth Shugg, Editor Editor’s photo courtesy of Morton Photography. Cover photo courtesy of RichVintage/






Billy Ryder ·


Candi Griffin • Sue Chen •






CONTACT US Phone: 919-956-2430 · Fax: 919-956-2427 5716 Fayetteville Rd., Suite 201, Durham, NC 27713 · Circulation 35,000. Distribution of this magazine does not constitute an endorsement of information, products or services. Carolina Parent reserves the right to reject any advertisement or listing that is not in keeping with the publication’s standards. Copyright 2019. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission is prohibited.

A Publication of the Visitor Publications Division of Morris Communications Company, L.L.C. 725 Broad St., Augusta, GA 30901 Chairman William S. Morris III

President & CEO William S. Morris IV





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SAT, APR 4, 2020 | 1PM & 4PM

Wesley Schulz, conductor Triangle Youth Ballet Come dressed as your favorite fairy-tale character or dragon-trainer and enjoy music from tales such as Sleeping Beauty, Frozen, The Sorcerer’s Apprentice, and How to Train your Dragon. Concert Sponsor: Wegmans

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In an effort to enhance visitor opportunities, unique experiences and education for all ages, North Carolina Gov. Roy Cooper recently signed bills into law authorizing a new state park and three new state trails. These bills will allow the addition of Pisgah View State Park in Buncombe and Haywood counties; Northern Peaks State Trail in Watauga and Ashe counties, the Wilderness Gateway State Trail in the South Mountains range in McDowell, Rutherford, Burke and Catawba counties; and the Overmountain Victory State Trail reaching across Avery, Mitchell, McDowell, Burke, Rutherford, Polk, Caldwell, Wilkes and Surry counties. Cooper expects the new state properties to have widespread positive impacts for health, quality of life and the economy. “These new parks and trails will conserve important wildlife habitats and support North Carolina’s flourishing outdoor recreation industry,” Cooper says. Pisgah View State Park will be in highly scenic southwest Buncombe and Haywood counties. The area is full of trails, unique habitats, cliffs, coves and upland forests that are home to several rare plant and animal species. Learn more at

3 in 4

The number of Americans who say they live within walking distance to a local park or recreational facility.


The percentage of Americans who consider high-quality park and recreation amenities important factors when choosing a new place to live.


The percentage of Americans who want to increase park and recreation funding.

SOURCE: 2018 Americans Engagement With Parks Report (



Photo courtesy of the North Carolina Railway Museum Inc.

Governor Cooper Signs Bills Authorizing New State Park and Trails

North Carolina Railway Museum Receives Grant The North Carolina Railway Museum Inc., home to New Hope Valley Railway in New Hill, received a $3,500 national heritage grant in May to help restore the 1884 Goldston Depot in its rail yard that will be used to educate visitors. The grant, which was awarded by the National Railway Historical Society Inc., will improve the historic building’s electrical wiring, chimney repair, masonry, woodwork, exterior drainage and decking. The NRHS grant is the starting point of more than $25,000 additional funds the North Carolina Railway Museum needs to restore the depot, which the

organization hopes to open in April 2021 to showcase railroad artifacts and memorabilia. “Our goal is for visitors to our museum and vintage railway to experience a historic, small-town depot that once served a shortline railroad in our state,” says Chris Tilley, president of the North Carolina Railway Museum. “One of the most interesting artifacts of the depot that we’re preserving is the handwritten messages on the interior wall left by railroad employees, townspeople and others passing through Goldston, North Carolina, more than 100 years ago.” Learn more at

Crowder County Park to Expand in Size Wake County residents will soon have more acreage to enjoy at Crowder County Park in Apex. The Wake County Board of Commissioners recently approved the $4.9 million purchase of 96 acres of land north of the park — a move that will quadruple its size. Crowder County Park, which opened in 1998 and currently occupies 33 acres, is Wake County’s third most-visited park but also the second smallest. It features a 3-acre pond with a boardwalk, three playgrounds, an outdoor amphitheater, walking trails and interpretive gardens. Expanding the park will require a master planning process, which includes opportunities for the public to provide feedback. Completion of the park could come in fiscal year 2025 and is expected to include fishing, environmental education and additional walking trails. A future connection to the Town of Cary’s Jack Smith Park and greenway system is also possible. Learn more at

Photos courtesy of Wake County Parks and Rec


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Triangle Represented in National History Day Competition Triangle-area students were among the top finishers in the National History Day Competition held June 9-13 at the University of Maryland, College Park. From more than 3,000 competitors, four North Carolina student projects were among the top 10 — and one, with the theme of “Triumph and Tragedy in History,” was a special prize winner. The Senior Outstanding Entry went to Pranet Sharma of Green Hope High School in Cary, who received ninth place in the Senior Paper category. His paper was titled, “From Cryptanalysis and Artificial Intelligence to Prosecution and Death: The Triumph and Tragedy of Alan Turing.” Two North Carolina projects were also selected to be showcased at Smithsonian Museums in Washington, D.C., including one from a Triangle student. The Senior Individual Exhibit by Meghana Chamarty of Panther Creek High School in Cary titled, “Frances Perkins: Piercing Political and Social Parameters,” was displayed at the National Museum of American History on Wednesday, June 12. For 45 years, National History Day has recognized and rewarded students for completing in-depth research and creating original projects that further appreciation and understanding of history.

Pranet Sharma, of Green Hope High School in Cary, was a winner in the National History Day competition at the University of Maryland. Photo courtesy of the North Carolina Department of Natural and Cultural Resources




Communications Agencies Reboot Award-Winning Diversity Program for High School Students What We Do You Can Too, a program that matches high school students with communications professionals, rebooted after a three-year hiatus to give 18 students in the Triangle an opportunity to intern at local communications agencies this summer. What We Do You Can Too was founded in 2012 and ran for four years. The program was redesigned to help students broaden their awareness of the communications industry in hopes that this experience will lead them to pursue a communications-related career. Students are paired with agencies across the Triangle to learn more about the communications profession and gain skills applicable to obtaining a job or internship. “Our team was blown away by the students’ presentations — the strategic thinking that went into it and the high level of creative output they produced in such a short time,” says Brandi Royal Washington, an account director at Ignite Social Media.

With the relaunch of this program, What We Do You Can Too professionals plan to continue fostering the minds of young creatives with the hope that each considers a career in the communications field. Parents and high school students interested in learning more about the program can visit

New Propane Repowered School Bus Solution Unveiled in Raleigh

chassis that have 7-12 years of useful life left, but no useful engine. For example, with grant funds in North Carolina, the cost to schools to repower a school bus with a brand-new engine can be less than $10,000. Nationally, propane is being embraced as a clean, domestic alternative fuel for schools. This repower solution is keeping with this trend. “Using the Propane Repower Bus will help school districts move to lessen their carbon footprint for a lower cost to the district, which saves money that can be used inside the classrooms,” says Christina Roberts, a sales representative for Suburban Propane, a local and national propane supplier.

This past July, the North Carolina Department of Public Instruction and Eco Vehicle Systems unveiled the nation’s only propane repowered school bus solution at Wake County Public School System’s Transportation Department in Raleigh. This new solution costs a fraction of the price of a new bus yet delivers full emissions reduction benefits, which equates to cleaner air. The Eco Vehicle Systems propane repower program allows schools to replace prematurely worn out diesel engines with much cleaner, new propane engines on bus

Communications Agency professionals mentor students. Photo courtesy of What We Do You Can Too

ABOVE: Propane-powered buses cost less than new buses and reduce pollution emissions. Photo courtesy of NCDPI

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Family Forward Workplaces Online Guide Now Available



The percentage of American families who spend at least 20% of their income on child care for preschool children. North Carolina is the 11th least affordable state in the country for child care for preschool-aged kids. SOURCE:

60 million

The number of Americans in 2019 who belong to health and fitness clubs.




workers and paid parental leave — that have evidence to support positive business outcomes and improved child health and well-being. To help create the guide, the North Carolina Early Childhood Foundation worked with an advisory council of prominent business leaders, community leaders and health

experts, and gathered input from more than 1,000 employers and employees throughout the state. Blue Cross NC, the founding sponsor of Family Forward NC in 2018, is investing $250,000 to support Family Forward NC’s second year. Learn more at

Moms at Work More than 70% of mothers with young children are working today, according to statistics from WalletHub, a personal finance website. In its annual survey of the “best states for working mothers,” North Carolina ranked 28th in 2019. North Carolina ranked 33rd for child care, 15th for professional opportunities and 37th for work-life balance. Read the complete survey results at

Image courtesy of Sudowoodo/

The North Carolina Early Childhood Foundation has launched an online companion to its “Guide to Family Forward Workplaces,” a resource that helps employers incorporate family-friendly workplace practices. The guide is part of Family Forward NC, an initiative to improve children’s health and well-being, and keep North Carolina’s businesses competitive by increasing access to research-based, family-friendly practices that improve workplace productivity, recruitment and retention, and support children’s healthy development. Family-friendly workplace practices such as flexible work schedules and paid parental leave have a direct, positive impact on child health and well-being and provide positive benefits to employers such as attraction and retention of top talent, improved productivity and boosted employee morale. “The Guide to Family Forward Workplaces” provides tools for employers of all sizes with practical tips for selecting and implementing 16 family-friendly practices — such as flexible scheduling, accommodations for pregnant

Katherine Kopp is a freelance writer in Chapel Hill.


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Breaking down your business casual wardrobe

This month we focus on a

Seasons Come, Seasons Go

Of course, you’ll want and need season-specific pieces. It’s nice

working woman’s business

to buy clothing you can wear all year long. Not every piece will

casual wardrobe. Start by

we’ve focused on some that can easily be swapped in and out

thinking about styles that

bridge the gap between spring, summer, fall and winter, but for different looks. Throw-on-and-go styles are great for spring and summer, but colder months require more thought and planning. Consider

rely less on trends and more

ensembles that get you to the office in the cold, but won’t burn you up once you’ve arrived.

on quality over quantity, where less is more.

In summer, throwing on a lightweight cardigan or scarf is an easy solution if you work in an air-conditioned office. Make dressing for colder months less overwhelming by reversing the process. Start with a base and layer to keep your core body

What you want are pieces

and top with heavier knits and sweaters, blazers or jackets, and a coat. You can remove pieces as needed.

that don’t overwhelm you and that make getting dressed more fun. Hopefully, in the end, you will have spent less money — and wasted none of it. 1




Photos courtesy of the respective brands. Photos 1 and 8 courtesy of Eve Simone Photography.

It’s also about strategy.

temperature warm in the extreme cold. Build with thin layers

IT! 7


The easiest way to pull a cold-weather look together? Add a scarf. It’s a chic way to roll with temperature fluctuations from outdoor to indoor spaces. If you like to shop seasonal trends, consider power suits (featuring bold, “I’m-in-charge” shoulders), belted blazers or jackets. Think classic ’70s working girl. Keep an eye out for pleats, tweed, neon, lace, dark florals and soft color palettes, too. Statement outerwear in animal prints like classic leopard and zebra are also big this fall and winter. 3


All About Separates Here are examples of key pieces you can use to build a versatile business casual wardrobe. For price-conscious alternatives, email Helen Banzet Wallace at

1. Proenza Schouler Deconstructed Blazer | $1,790 | 2. Proenza Schouler Striped Jacquard Knit Skirt | $890 | 3. L’AGENCE Marcella Bodysuit (paired with jeans) | $365 | 4. Nili Lotan Benning Trench Coat | $795 | 5. Vince Plaid Wide Leg Pants | $365 | 6. Goldsign The Ultra Wide Leg Trousers | $395 | 7. Ulla Johnson Albi Top | $325 | Raquel Allegra Button Front Skirt | $890 | 5


8. Tibi Curly Faux Lamb Peacoat in Ivory | $695 | Helen Banzet Wallace is a freelance writer, fashion blogger and mom. Her work has appeared in local and regional publications. | SEPTEMBER 2019


The Decline in Youth Sports What’s causing it and how do we fix it? BY DAVE HERPY


articipation in youth sports is declining in the U.S. — and parents may be partly to blame. According to a report from the Sports and Fitness Industry Association, youth ages 6-12 who played team sports in 2018 was down almost 8% from 2008. As a father of four, camp and youth development professional, and youth sports coach in the Triangle, I’ve witnessed the decline firsthand, and I’d like for us, as parents, to do something about it. The Washington Post recently published a couple of articles that cite a variety of reasons for the decline in youth sports. Its June 1, 2016, article titled, “Why 70 percent of kids quit sports by age 13,” highlights several reasons for the decline, including participants not having fun and feeling pressured to specialize in a single sport and achieve at an elite level. An Oct. 4, 2015, article published by The Washington Post titled, “Are parents ruining youth sports? Fewer kids play amid pressure,” discusses the ultracompetitive youth sports culture parents have helped create.

CAUSES So what is causing the decline in youth sports participation? Jason Bocarro, a professor in the Department of Parks, Recreation and Tourism Management at North Carolina State University whose research includes youth sports, says he is



“living this as both a researcher and a parent. ... It is a complex problem without a single solution.” A primary reason is cost. Youth sports expenses range from registration fees to travel equipment, making it difficult for some families to afford it. This creates an access issue for lowincome families. The second reason is specialization. With the goal of acquiring a college scholarship in mind, many parents push their athlete to specialize in a single sport, which not only reduces participation numbers across all sports, but can also have a negative impact on the athlete. Specialization in one sport often leads to travel team participation, which not only requires athletes to achieve at the highest possible level, but also leaves out youth who don’t compete or play at that elite level. Specialization can also result in overuse injuries, which can prevent the athlete from playing that sport altogether. A final cause that goes along with travel sports is the pull of qualified coaches away from recreational teams to travel teams. Since travel sports clubs strive to hire the most experienced coaches, less qualified coaches are often left to manage recreational teams, which may also hurt participation on those teams — especially if a child has a less-than-positive experience and opts not to play again, or feels he or she is not good enough to play.

PARENTS VS. YOUTH PERSPECTIVE If you ask a parent and child what they get out of youth sports, you’re likely to get very different answers. The Oct. 4, 2015 article in The Washington Post surmises that “youth sports is the new keeping up with the Joneses.” While many parents take a humble approach to travel sports, this observation by The Washington Post appears to be directed at parents who consider their child’s participation on a travel team a “badge of honor.” For children, it’s supposed to be — and often is — about having fun, learning new skills, teamwork and experiencing positive coaching. That same article in The Washington Post reports that a George Washington University survey of nearly 150 youth found that winning was ranked very low — at 48 out of 81 factors contributing to happiness in youth sports. Aaron M. Brown, owner of Brown Strength and Conditioning, a sports performance gym in Raleigh, is a also certified strength and conditioning specialist who is accredited by USA Weightlifting and works with elite athletes in his gym. “In my experience training young athletes for youth sports, I have seen many kids losing their passion for the game due to unreasonable expectations put upon them by their parents,” he says. “In order for us as parents to allow our kids to enjoy youth sports, it’s time to step back and let them play, fail, succeed and most importantly, have fun!”

NEGATIVE IMPACTS OF PARENTAL PRESSURE In November 2018, a 40-year-old father of a youth football player from Princeton, North Carolina, was arrested after assaulting an 11-year-old player from the Selma Yellow Jackets youth football team during a youth league game taking place on the field at Smithfield-Selma High School in Johnston County. According to the Johnston County Sheriff ’s Office, the man was arrested after witnesses say he picked up the player and slammed him on the ground. They charged the parent with assaulting a

child under 12. This is just one local example of parents getting out of hand during youth sports games. As part of an effort to curb unruly sportsmanship, the Town of Clayton’s Parks and Recreation Department requires parents to attend a preseason meeting and sign a “Parent Code of Conduct” that they must adhere to for the season, helping ensure a positive experience for all participating youth athletes. “We strive to provide a fun and engaging environment for all of our youth sports leagues, and we believe this starts on Day One with the conduct of our parents,” says Nick Rummage, athletic program coordinator for Clayton Parks and Recreation. “We set out our expectations before the season even starts. Parents know they are expected to positively support the players, coaches and officials at all times. The children playing the game will emulate the behavior of the adults around them, and sour attitudes lead to an unenjoyable experience.”

HOW TO REVERSE THE PROBLEM So what can we, as parents, do to help reverse this problem? We can and should change our focus from that of winning and being No. 1 to that of positive youth development. There are many life skills learned through youth sports that we should focus on as parents: cooperation, goal setting, sportsmanship and teamwork, to name a few. We can also help keep the “youth” in youth sports by empowering young athletes to take the lead in this area. Let’s allow them to decide whether or not to play, and give them the power to choose what sports they want to play. Let’s encourage them to play a variety of sports and try new activities. Let’s also allow them to take a break if they want to. I experienced this myself recently when our oldest two children both decided to take a break from spring sports and activities. Our 8-year-old son and 6-year-old daughter had been playing sports for more than three years, season after season. They started with soccer through the Greater Cleveland Athletic Association in Johnston County. From there, our daughter went on to participate in gymnastics at Dream Gymnastics in Garner, and our son played basketball and tennis through Clayton Parks and Recreation, as well as PGA Jr. League golf through Pine Hollow Golf Club in Clayton. We respected their decision to take a break from sports. (To be honest, the break from practices and matches three days a week between the two children was somewhat of a relief for my wife and me, too.) I believe that when children are intrinsically motivated to play sports, as opposed to extrinsically motivated by parents, they have a much better experience and will be more likely to stick with it. I witnessed this when coaching our children’s soccer OPPOSITE PAGE: Dave Herpy coaches his son, Jacob, and his teammate, Nina. Photo courtesy of Ana Choto LEFT: Herpy and son, Jacob, recently enjoyed a break from spring sports. Photo courtesy of Dave Herpy | SEPTEMBER 2019


teams. You could tell the players who were there because they were genuinely interested in playing, versus the children who were there because their parents forced them to be there.

BENEFITS OF YOUTH SPORTS There are numerous benefits of youth sports — mainly life skills and positive youth development. As I stated previously, youth athletes learn many life skills through sports — cooperation, goal setting, sportsmanship and teamwork — that are valuable to a child’s learning experiences, especially later in life. One final benefit is the development of lifetime activities. As someone who grew up running cross-country and track, I have been able to continue running later in life as a competitive agegroup runner, which helps me maintain an active and healthy lifestyle. Similarly, when children develop an interest in lifetime activities such as golfing, running, swimming or tennis, it helps them stay active and healthy later in life. Encouraging this in our children should be our ultimate goal and joy as parents. In the book “Youth Development Principles and Practices in Out-of-School Time Settings” (Sagamore-Venture Publishing, March 2018), Bocarro co-authored a chapter titled, “The Status of Youth Sports in American Society.” He opens with an example from a local youth female athlete who was a top recruit and had committed to playing college soccer on a scholarship. The opening states: “As I lay on the field that day, I knew my leg was broken; I heard it and I felt it. I didn’t even try to get up and I heard my dad yelling from the sideline. ‘Come on, Hannah; you’re fine. Get up!’ My mind raced. I thought about my parents and how much time, money and emotion they had invested in my soccer career since I was little. I thought about my coaches and teammates and how much they were counting on me. Our team had a great chance to win the state championship that year. Then I thought about how much of my life had been consumed by soccer since I was 6 years old. At that moment, I realized that I wouldn’t have to play soccer anymore. It was the happiest day of my life.” It is the responsibility of coaches and parents to provide inspiring youth development experiences for children. As they grow into adults, these athletes will remember and hold onto their youth sports days. If we want our children to have positive memories of playing youth sports, let’s do everything we can to help make that happen. Dave Herpy is a father of four, camp and youth development professional, and youth sports coach in the Triangle. He has a master’s in recreation and sport science from Ohio University and more than 20 years of experience directing camps and coaching youth sports.

RIGHT: Parents form a spirit tunnel as a youth soccer team gets ready to play. Photo courtesy of Ana Choto



Mastering the Work-From-Home Juggling Act Triangle parents share 6 tips for balancing work and life BY LAYLA KHOURY-HANOLD deep sense of irony struck me while writing this article. I was simultaneously conducting a phone interview, paying bills and praying the dryer wouldn’t wake up my daughter from her nap. On productive days, when I meet an assignment deadline and get the laundry folded, it feels like I have this work-from-home life balance down pat. But when both my inbox and sink are piled high, and there’s little more than a door to separate the two, that balance really feels off kilter. Working from home is on the rise. According to a 2018 survey conducted by the U.S. Department of Labor Bureau of Labor Statistics, 23% of workers spent some time working from home during an average workday in 2017. And with an increase in families that have both parents working (63% of families now consist of working married parents with kids under age 18, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics), working from home helps parents do their jobs without paying for child care, and gives them an

opportunity to go into business for themselves. According to a Feb. 15, 2017, New York Times article titled, “Out of the Office: More People are Working Remotely, Survey Finds,” many industries are embracing work-at-home policies — especially the finance, insurance and real estate industries. The percentage of workers in those fields who reported working remotely at least sometimes rose from 39% in 2012 to 47% in 2016, according to the article. Parents who work from home face a unique challenge, however: managing work-life balance. Three Triangle parents offer tips for how to navigate those challenges, set boundaries and reap the rewards.

1. BUST THE WORK-FROM-HOME MYTH One assumption many people make about working from home is that it’s hard to get any real work done (Google “work-from-home memes” for starters). But Nick Williams of Durham, who traded | SEPTEMBER 2019


in his retail job to become a freelance writer and stay-at-home dad, hasn’t found that to be the case. “I thought I’d be less efficient, but the opposite is true. If I want to spend 30 minutes on a personal project, it helps me get my obligations done in a more efficient way,” he says. Michelle Vanderwalker, a ceramicist who lives and works from home in Durham, also finds that she’s more productive than she would be in a traditional job setting. “I’m doing something that I love to do, and when I’m in the flow, I’m likely to spend much more time doing something than I would if I were going to a job for a specific amount of time,” she says.

2. CREATE A WORKSPACE AND SET BOUNDARIES Having a designated workspace is key to work-from-home success. It’s helpful if there’s a door, but if not, you can still set boundaries and make it clear to your family that when you’re in your workspace, you’re not to be disturbed. Try hanging a sign on your door that tells family members when you’re not to be interrupted. Cary Heise, who started a company located in Raleigh called Designed for Joy that facilitates transitional work experiences for women coming from vulnerable situations, does much of her job from her home office in Apex. She’s protective of her workspace, particularly since she holds client meetings there. “It’s not a playroom. It’s not supposed to be where people gather to watch TV. It is my office,” Heise says. “I have to respect that boundary, too, because sometimes I can move away from that.” Another key to setting parameters is managing expectations. For Heise, communication is paramount, so she shares her weekly schedule with her family. That way they know when she will be hosting or attending an event, or when she needs to block out time to prepare for a trip. Be sure to keep your own expectations realistic, too. As with parenting, working from home requires you to roll with the punches. Williams has learned to accept that if his daughter stays home sick, he must drop everything to take care of her and carve out time outside of his usual work schedule to meet work deadlines.

3. CASH IN ON THE BENEFITS A flexible schedule is a big perk of working from home. Since Williams isn’t worried about clocking in and out for a shift, he can make time for events he used to miss out on — like hitting the gym or scheduling lunch with a friend. If your spouse also works from home, take advantage of the opportunity to spend some one-on-one time with each other. Heise and her husband often enjoy lunch dates while the kids are at school. Vanderwalker stays on top of her workload while home schooling her two kids by carving out time to work while they’re asleep. And because there’s no morning hustle to get out the door, she has more flexibility to help them with schoolwork, or take family walks during the afternoon. Some work-from-home parents may be able to transform work



activities into enrichment or educational experiences for the kids. Vanderwalker and her husband, Sean Umstead, own Kingfisher, a Durham craft cocktail bar that focuses on fruit- and vegetableinfused drinks. They often take their kids fruit-picking at local farms. Even if the children don’t last the entire day to help pit cherries in the kitchen, they do gain an appreciation for hard work. Heise says working from home has helped foster her kids’ independence; they make their own lunches and take responsibility for small housekeeping tasks.

4. CALL FOR BACKUP Just because you work solo doesn’t mean you can’t call for reinforcements. In fact, asking for help is essential. If Vanderwalker needs extra time to fill an order of custom plates, she can drop off her kids at their grandparents’ house, or call a friend to ferry them to after-school activities. Heise realized she couldn’t do it all as a work-from-homenmom and has since hired a monthly cleaning service. She also isn’t shy about asking other parents to bake treats or help out with other tasks for school events.

5. PUT A PREMIUM ON YOUR SANITY Even with the most ideal work-from-home setup, doing your job can feel like a daily grind. Shake up your routine every so often by working from a coffee shop, library or coworking space to keep your workflow fresh and to help inspire new ideas. Since you don't have as much interaction with co-workers when you work from home, connecting with other adults is still important. Vanderwalker hosts a weekly potluck with friends and family, while Heise plans playdates with friends. “[We] to go to the beach and we paddleboard all day,” she says. “I don’t want another meeting or lunch date. I want to have a real adventure and have time with friends.”

6. DON’T NEGLECT SELF-CARE Be intentional and consistent about taking care of yourself by building time for it into your workday. Schedule a morning exercise session, or a 15-minute break to walk or read for fun. Which reminds me, it’s time for my lunch break. That load of towels can wait, right? Layla Khoury-Hanold is a freelance writer whose work has appeared on Food Network, Saveur and Refinery29; and in Raleigh Magazine, The News & Observer and INDY Week. Learn more about her at, @glassofrose on Twitter.

PREVIOUS PAGE, CLOCKWISE FROM LEFT: Nick Williams of Durham is a freelance writer and stay-at-home dad. Photo courtesy of Nick Williams | Ceramicist Michelle Vanderwalker finds that she’s more productive working from home than she would be in a traditional job setting. Photo courtesy of Chris Fowler | Cary Heise hangs out with her daughter, Ashlin, in her Apex home office. Photo courtesy of 627 Photography

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Social Media Smarts

How athletes can create a positive online presence that works to their advantage BY KURT DUSTERBERG


rooke Hanshumaker remembers exactly when she discovered the power of social media. During the summer before her junior year at Apex High School, she attended a university camp for volleyball recruits. During a break, she was hanging out with a group of friends and noticed another athlete taking a video of herself complaining about how the camp was tiring and a lot of work. The girl posted the video on her “Finsta” account, a private Instagram account intended for close friends. Somehow, it went public. “I was in the background of the video, laughing,” Hanshumaker says. “I wasn’t in the conversation at all. I wasn’t talking about what she was talking about, but if you were watching the video, it did kind of look like I was laughing at it or I was participating.” A few days later, the university discovered the video and had the camper remove it from her account. “I thought it was a really interesting learning experience,” says Hanshumaker, now a college freshman who plays for UNCWilmington’s indoor and beach volleyball teams. “I wasn’t even doing anything bad — I wasn’t really involved.” Such are the potential pitfalls of social media platforms like Instagram, Snapchat and Twitter. They can complicate the social lives of any teen, but for high school athletes pursuing an athletic career in college, the stakes are higher. A 2015 study by Cornerstone



Reputation, a social media reputation management company for students, found that 97% of college coaches and recruiters believe a negative online presence could harm a recruit’s prospects. Not only do coaches want to avoid problematic players, but universities want to protect their reputations.

OWN YOUR SUCCESSES AND FAILURES ONLINE Paul Pogge, a UNC-Chapel Hill associate athletic director, helps Tar Heel football players present themselves on social media. He believes it’s smart for athletes to take a long-term view before posting something they may regret later. “There are incidents every year of people posting comments on social media that may not be offensive or in really bad taste, but maybe not their best representation of themselves, by their own calculation, when they look at it in the future,” Pogge says. While stories of posts mired in bad judgment serve as cautionary tales, savvy athletes and advisers have begun emphasizing the positive impact of social media. Used properly, the various platforms can help secure a scholarship, raise an athlete’s profile and even help them get a leg up on a future career. “What you can control is the message you put in front of your coaches and teammates,” says Laura Tierney, a former aSll-American field hockey player at Duke University and founder of The Social Institute in Durham, which helps students manage their social media

accounts. “You don’t only show what others expect to see; you have the confidence to share things that truly represent who you are,” she says. “It sounds cliche, but it’s the confidence of being yourself and owning your successes, and being proud of them.” While winning is often easy to handle, Tierney believes college coaches look favorably on high school athletes who take a mature approach to social media posts after a loss. “It’s owning your failures and being able to share a lowlight, even if you didn’t win the championship game,” she says. “Instead, maybe it’s giving kudos to the whole team for making it to the championship game. Using it positively is not only sharing the positive things that happen in a student athlete’s life, it’s also showing that you’re OK with adversity.” Pogge says he believes most UNC-Chapel Hill athletes embrace the positive outcomes social media can provide.

“I think more and more young men and women are starting to understand the extraordinary potential that social media can have in a positive way,” he says. “By showcasing their character, by positioning themselves as role models and providing glimpses into their daily life, that can serve as inspirational examples for other kids or other people.” At most universities, members of the coaching staff and athletic department carefully monitor enrolled athletes and recruits for posts that reveal bad character, intolerance and inappropriate comments. After all, the posts reflect on both the athlete and the school. When Hanshumaker steps onto the larger stage of college athletics, she will continue using common sense to guide her decisions. “I honestly just think before I post,” she says. “My coaches follow me, so they’re going to see this. If it’s something offensive, then I just won’t post it. I just err on the safe side. I would hate to put something out there and someone sees it and then [I] get in trouble for it. I mean, what’s the point?” Read more tips for guiding your athlete to make wise social media posting decisions in this month's Tech Talk column and at Kurt Dusterberg of Apex is a father of two teen athletes and covers the Carolina Hurricanes for He’s also the author of “Journeymen: 24 Bittersweet Tales of Short Major League Sports Careers.” PICTURED, LEFT TO RIGHT: North Carolina State University wide receiver N’Keal Harry makes a great catch against Arizona State University in the Hyundai Sun Bowl in El Paso, Texas, on Dec. 29, 2017. Photo courtesy of Jeff Schultes/Shutterstock. com | Brooke Hanshumaker, a graduate of Apex High School, is a freshman on UNC-Wilmington’s indoor and beach volleyball team. Photo courtesy of Warlick Photography | Duke Blue Devils forward Oderah Chidom and UNC Tar Heels forward Hillary Summers jump for the ball at Carmichael Arena during the 2016 season. Photo courtesy of Jeff Schultes/

SOCIAL MEDIA TIPS FOR ATHLETES While sound judgment goes a long way, here are some important social media posting tips you can share with your student athlete from Laura Tierney, owner of The Social Institute in Durham; Paul Pogge, a UNC-Chapel Hill associate athletic director; and Brooke Hanshumaker, a college freshman who plays for UNC-Wilmington’s indoor and beach volleyball teams. 1. Choose the right followers and friends. “Surround yourself with people who encourage you to be the best you can be,” Tierney says. “The question I pose to all students, but

especially student athletes is, ‘Who are you following in your feed that encourages you to be the best version of yourself, who raises the bar for you each day?’ Induct some of those people into your feed if you don’t have them already.” 2. Be cautious with your whereabouts. College athletes are exposed to the public and gain followers, including rival fans. Pogge says he strives to help UNC-Chapel Hill athletes understand the risks they expose themselves to when they voluntarily put information about themselves out there in the

public domain. “We urge them to exercise caution in what they’re willing to share about where they are and what they’re doing,” he says, and to “think through how the post might be used to their detriment by people who don’t have their best interests in mind.” 3. Consider the potential reactions to your posts. “If you share something, people look at the comments too,” Hanshumaker says. “People may comment on your picture. It’s not necessarily you saying something (inappropriate), but if it’s on your picture, it reflects badly on you.” | SEPTEMBER 2019



Good Morning, Sunshine! Building a better morning routine BY MALIA JACOBSON

Elementary Years Lunch Land Your grade schooler opts for a hot lunch, but then asks for a PB&J minutes before the bus arrives. Your 11-year-old is supposed to pack her own lunch but doesn’t remember until it’s time to leave for school. Sound familiar? School lunch struggles can ruin even the best-laid morning routine, but you don’t have to surrender. A little advance planning can

Teen Years

Early Years Model Mornings Establishing a steady, manageable morning routine is good for everyone in the family — even kids who haven’t yet started school. Decide on your morning routine along with one or two morning self-care tasks for your child to practice, such as dressing, hair combing or putting on shoes. Some children may even be able to pour cereal and milk, butter toast or complete small morning chores like feeding pets. Just don’t expect speed or perfection. Model the morning behavior you’d like your child to learn. If calm, pleasant mornings are your goal, adopt that attitude yourself. “If you scream, yell, run and throw stuff in the morning, your children will associate mornings with screaming, yelling, running and throwing stuff. They will simply think that this is what mornings should be like,” says educational psychologist Oksana Hagerty, assistant director of the Center for Student Success at Beacon College in Leesburg, Florida. “Remember, learning to do things right always comes before learning to do things fast.” When morning stress does strike, take a few deep breaths to calm yourself before sharing your distress with your child.



know your child will eat,” Richardson says. “Or families can assign a theme to every weekday, like breakfast for lunch on Monday, taco Tuesday, chicken on Wednesday, cheese and crackers on Thursday, and sandwiches on Friday.” Another strategy: Make lunches the previous evening during dinner preparation or cleanup instead of just before bed, when everyone is tired and more likely to forget.

simplify lunch packing and keep mornings on track, says Lisa Richardson, a clinical dietician and owner of Carolina Family Nutrition in Chapel Hill. “Sitting down to plan a bit before the school year starts can go far in keeping lunch choices healthful.” Keep things simple and think like a school menu planner. “Make a rotating two-week menu that you use for the entire semester, with just 10 different lunches. These don’t need to be complicated! Think protein, carbohydrate, fruit and a vegetable, and stick to foods you

Out the Door in a Hurry According to the National Sleep Foundation, teenagers’ biorhythms push them to stay up later and sleep in, and school start times are often earlier for teens than younger children. This gives a new urgency to the morning rush, since your tired teenager may need to be out the door earlier than the rest of the family. Streamlining a teen’s morning routine can help maximize sleep, minimize stress and ensure that he or she makes it to first period on time. Establish a habit of making morning decisions the night before, Hagerty says. “Mornings are not the time to make decisions; mornings are for their implementation.” High-protein, grab-and-go breakfasts can help teens get needed nutrition in a hurry, Richardson says. A high-protein breakfast also helps teens feel fuller longer, and can help them manage their weight. Grab-and-go items like slices of ham or turkey, Greek yogurt, fruit, boiled eggs, peanut butter, cottage cheese, and highprotein muffin and pancake mixes can be prepped for quick weekday breakfasts. Even an apple and a slice of cheese while going out the door can give a teen energy for the morning. Malia Jacobson is a nationally published health and family journalist.

Image courtesy of Victor Brave/


ack-to-school season brings new backpacks, fresh school supplies and the return of the morning rush. We aim for a strong start to the day, only to often end up with school mornings snarled in stress. Thankfully, there’s a better way, but you may need to take a new approach. The key: Choosing manageable, age-appropriate goals that build kids’ time-management skills and gradually increase their autonomy. Read on for expert-approved strategies aimed at calming the morning rush.


Do Infant Seats Help Your Baby Sit Up — or Derail Her Progress? BY REBECCA QUINONES AND RACHEL GANDY

Photos courtesy of (left to right) FamVeld/ and Caziopeia/


nfant seats that hold a baby in a sitting position are popular with parents because they are relatively small, lightweight, inexpensive and marketed as a way for your baby to be able to sit up and remain contained while she plays. One of the most common of these seats is the Bumbo. Parents may be drawn to it because of its simplicity, price, the idea of having their young infant sit up, or a desire to let him play in a position other than on his back or belly. As physical therapists who work with infants, we have learned that many parents believe this seat will also help their baby learn to sit up by himself. Unfortunately, when we look at the design of the Bumbo seat, we see features that, in our opinion, make this a lessthan-perfect choice for helping your baby learn to sit on her own. To illustrate this observation, it’s important to understand that a baby learns to sit up by using the muscles in her back (extensors) and front (flexors) together. When a baby is learning to sit up, her bottom (pelvis) should be the farthest thing back, and her shoulders should be in front of her hips. This position places the pelvis in a slight anterior tilt, with the trunk flexed forward over the legs. You can

picture this as your baby leaning forward, placing her hands near her feet to provide tripod-like support, or folded over with her chin near her toes. As your baby becomes stronger, she will begin to use her back and hip extensors to move into a more upright position and eventually sit up. When a child is positioned in the Bumbo seat, the rounded bottom and back of the chair places her pelvis in a posterior tilt, with his bottom tucked under him, limiting the activity of his trunk and hip extensors. Also, the front of the seat is elevated under his legs, causing her position to be tipped back even more. This positioning of the pelvis is a large part of the reason infants look slumped over when sitting in the Bumbo. Without having the space or positioning to lean forward, your baby is not encouraged to activate his extensor muscles or stay in a more upright position. Also, his head moves too far forward over his trunk, leading to additional problems with his posture. Aside from the major concerns about a baby’s posture in the Bumbo seat, it is also important to think back to your baby’s primary motor goal during his first year: learning to move. If we simply place him in a seat that confines his movement and holds him in a position, it is much more difficult for him to learn to master

the skill independently Like adults, babies need to move and change positions frequently. Once they can sit, infants rarely spend prolonged periods of time sitting still without actively reaching, shifting their weight from side to side, moving to their tummy or back to get a toy, or otherwise wiggling and shimmying around. As they do this, they are learning about their environment and developing the processing of their vestibular system, which tells the brain where a person is in space, and provides information about how the person is moving. Spending long periods of time contained in any device, including the Bumbo, can limit your baby’s opportunities to provide important sensory information to the brain, and help develop this sensory system. Rebecca Quinones and Rachel Gandy, both of whom have doctorates in physical therapy, are founders of Babies On The MOVE, a Cary-based organization committed to helping children excel in motor development with in-home pediatric physical therapy and community-based infant movement classes for all abilities. Learn more about their services at | SEPTEMBER 2019



When a Parent Returns to Work


t is often the case that a parent who has remained at home for many months or years chooses — or needs — to return to work. As with most changes in a family, the age of the child or children will determine the best ways to approach and handle this transition. Because the adjustment required of preschool and early elementary school children will be greater, we will focus on this group. If you have spent years at home with your child, you may feel conflicted about your decision to return to work. It’s a complex choice to make, and therefore essential to understand that children grow through the challenges they receive help with. This is an opportunity for you to model that you have diverse interests and contribute to the world, in addition to your family. Despite the fact that a loving parent often shares in the resentment and other negative feelings a child experiences as he faces this kind of change, it is also essential that you avoid the trap of guilt. If you feel guilty, your child will invariably know and may read the situation as one in which harm is truly being inflicted, which could hamper his process of adaptation and growth. When you join/rejoin the workforce, the nature of your child’s day will most likely change. Perhaps your child will begin day care, after-school care or some other new care arrangement. In this situation, the most important part of the day for you to focus on is when you reunite with your child at the end of the day. She has stored up challenges throughout the day without the presence of the parent who knows her in a special way, and who provides comfort and assistance like no other person can. Therefore, this time of coming together is especially important.



Your child may need something extra from you at that time. Perhaps he collapses from the extra effort required to manage the day apart from his parent so he becomes clingy, fragile or unreasonable for a time. We advise parents to keep two things in mind during this reunion. First, your child will most likely grow from this new and challenging transition if you are as present for him as possible, and for a reasonably sustained period of time. Although things cannot be controlled (there may be siblings who also need attention, or certain tasks that may be necessary to attend to), we suggest that you defer everything that can be deferred. Second, provide as much leeway as possible during these situations. Certainly unacceptable behavior deserves comments or consequences, but there is always a gray zone and, within that zone, we suggest veering toward comfort rather than admonishment. Challenges are opportunities for growth. With sensitive responsiveness on the part of you, the parent, your return to the workplace should be an opportunity for your child to expand her independence. As always, if your child continues to react negatively to your return to work for months and months, or doesn’t seem to be thriving away from you, professional advice or assessment is worth considering. The Lucy Daniels Center is a nonprofit agency in Cary that promotes the emotional health and well-being of children and families. Visit to learn more.

Image courtesy of Lepusinensis/



Celebrating Youth Sports In an era when parents and educators seem increasingly concerned about the harmful effects of too much screen time, encouraging kids to stay active and play sports is more important than ever. These books will inspire your child to try a new sport, stick with an old one (even if it’s discouraging), learn the value of being a team player and feel empowered to include others in their sports endeavors — even if they have a disability.


Book cover images courtesy of the respective publishers

In “Cheerful Chick” (Arthur A. Levine Books, 40 pages, $17.99), author Martha Brockenbrough tells the story of Chick, who has wanted to be a cheerleader from the moment she was born. However, she realizes she is up against a tough crowd when the cows, pigs, sheep, horses and other animals in the barnyard seem wholly unamused by her attempts at ginning up team spirit. In the end, little Chick discovers a squad of chicklets just like herself who back her up and love cheering, too. This tale, geared toward children ages 4-8, offers a great lesson in perseverance and finding a sport that is the best for you. “Janine and the Field Day Finish” (Albert Whitmaan & Company, 32 pages, $16.99), is a tale of support, encouragement and teamwork. Author-illustrator Maryann Cocca-Leffler introduces readers to Janine, who is not very good at sports. Janine doesn’t have very good vision, and is clumsy and uncoordinated when it comes to athletics, but she is still ready to support her friends and classmates as they compete in field day. Janine is an excellent role model for all kids because she teaches them the value of showing support and feeling happy for others. For example, when her classmate, Abby, trips and falls during a big race, Janine is there to help her cross the finish line. She teaches Abby that winning is not everything. This book was written for ages 4-8.

In “Curious George Joins the Team” (HMH Books for Young Readers, 24 pages, $13.99), author Cynthia Platt continues in the tradition of Curious George’s original creators, Margret and H.A. Rey, by taking us on the lovable chimp’s journey to a nearby park to play basketball. George’s friend, Tina, is also there, but she is in a wheelchair and is too shy to ask if she can join in the fun. George encourages Tina, saying he knows she is just as good as the other kids, and helps her overcome her fears. This story celebrates how kids of all abilities can play together and was written for ages 4-7. “I Got It!” (Clarion Books, 32 pages, $17.99) by Caldecott Medalist David Wiesner tells the story of an eager young baseball player in the outfield who tries to tame his imagination as he awaits a pop fly that lingers in the air for what seems like an eternity. The young athlete has plenty of time to envision both disastrous and comical situations that might interfere with him catching the ball. Yet in the end, he overcomes the imaginary obstacles (like getting wrapped around a tree or jumping so high he catches a bird instead of the ball) and turns them into a positive athletic experience. “I Got It!” is told almost entirely through illustrations reminiscent of those in the classic tale, “Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.” This book was written for ages 4-7. Elizabeth Lincicome is a mother, communications expert and freelance writer based in Raleigh. | SEPTEMBER 2019



Social Media Lessons From Playing Sports BY LAURA TIERNEY


grew up playing sports — from youth travel teams to high school athletics, and then at Duke University, where I had the honor of being named two-time captain of the field hockey team and a four-time Duke University All-American. I also played with the U.S. Women’s Junior National Field Hockey Team, representing our country at home and abroad. During this journey, I grew up with and navigated social media, which is why I have since hung up my cleats and now work as a social media coach to tens of thousands of students around the country. In today’s digital world, those timeless principles I learned as a student-athlete are more relevant than ever. So, here are five lessons I learned from playing sports that hopefully will help you and your kids navigate the complex, ever-changing world of social media. 1. You represent something bigger than yourself. In team sports, there is the famous phrase that the name on the front of the jersey is just as important as the name on the back of the jersey. When it comes to social media, every person represents something bigger than himself or herself — whether it’s a family, school, team, musical group, club or employer. Everything you share on social media reflects your values — and is also a reflection of those with whom you connect. 2. Be coachable. Playing field hockey at Duke University taught me so much about hard work and character — both on and off the field. I always tried to be coachable. Being coachable means you’re leaving room for the possibility that there’s something you haven’t learned yet that could make you even better. When it comes to social media, make sure you’re open to being coached by listening to parents, teachers, mentors and friends. 3. Build a strong team. Whether you’re chasing a state championship, building a great Fantasy Football team or requesting references for a college application, it’s important to surround yourself with good people — even on social media. Why? Because who we surround ourselves with can fuel who we are and who we become. Think of everyone you follow on social media as your “team.” Do you have high standards for who joins your team? For whom you choose to follow? From whom you accept friend requests? Aim for a high character roster.



4. Remember the fans in the stands. Like sports, you have a built-in audience on social media. People are watching, and while your wins are celebrated, your mistakes and missteps are often amplified and shared. It’s the social media equivalent of an instant replay. And just like scouts and coaches who watch athletes from the stands, future co-workers, mentors and bosses may request your “instant replays” down the road. Post with these future fans in mind. 5. Go the extra mile. In sports, you aim to get out of your comfort zone and go the extra mile. This mindset can help you on social media, too. The promotional tools available for youth today are powerful. You can raise money for an important cause or shine a spotlight on an issue that’s important to you. Athletes, artists, musicians and actors can all create highlight reels to help propel them into opportunities they might not otherwise experience. I recently caught up with Derek Jones, assistant football coach at Duke University. Jones says savvy students are harnessing the power of social media to get the attention of coaches. “Given how NCAA rules limit calls and in-person meetings, social media is the new way to show us coaches your likes, interests and how you carry yourself,” he says. “It’s the new way for us to interview you.” In sports, and in life, we all like to win. And when it comes to social media, winning means using it in positive, high character ways — ways that strengthen your reputation, build meaningful relationships and improve the world — one text, “snap” and post at a time. Laura Tierney, a digital native who got her first phone at age 13, is founder and president of The Social Institute, which offers students positive ways to handle one of the biggest drivers of their social development: social media. She also recently became a mom. Learn more at PICTURED ABOVE: Laura Tierney played field hockey for Duke University. Photo courtesy of Duke University


Should Resumes be Submitted With College Applications? BY DAVE BERGMAN, ED.D.


Image courtesy of Julia Lazebnaya/

f your student is a teenage prodigy who spent her spare time in high school interning at a cancer research laboratory and founding a charitable organization that distributes prescription glasses to children in Zimbabwe, then being asked to formulate a resume as part of her college application might sound like a perfectly natural proposition. It’s easy to summarize such prodigious achievements in resume form if your child happens to be a wunderkind with a list of accomplishments longer than most MacArthur Fellows. Yet, for most 17- or 18-year-olds who happen to be mere mortals, the task of writing a resume might feel rather intimidating. Worry not! Here is everything you need to know about college application resumes, beginning with the most important question. DO MY STUDENT’S PROSPECTIVE COLLEGES ACCEPT/REQUIRE/ENCOURAGE RESUMES? You’ll definitely want to make sure your child checks the admissions websites of every one of his prospective colleges, as policies run the gamut from “required” to “not allowed.” For example, Cornell University’s prestigious School of Hotel Administration requires applicants to submit a resume with their application. On the other end of the spectrum, the University of Virginia explicitly states: “We do not accept resumes, research papers or supplemental application items …” More in the middle, MIT, which uses its own application, warns that applicants “are welcome to submit a supplemental resume, but submitting a resume instead of filling out our activity list can hurt you (so don’t).”

IF OPTIONAL, WILL A RESUME ADD ANYTHING TO YOUR STUDENT’S APPLICATION PROFILE? This is the essential question that applicants need to ask themselves when determining whether or not to submit supplemental information to a “resume-optional” institution. There are, after all, plenty of admissions officers who are annoyed by the inclusion of extraneous submissions from applicants. When you’re responsible for sifting through 111,266 applications at UCLA and a student has included a dozen writing samples and a seven-minute video about her passion for live action role-playing, annoyance may only be the tip of the emotional iceberg. To a slightly lesser extent, the inclusion of a student resume that restates everything verbatim already laid out in the activities section of the Common App will also cause consternation for busy admissions professionals. TIPS FOR WRITING A STRONG COLLEGE RESUME If it ends up that one or more of your student’s schools of interest require or recommend the submission of a resume, make sure he or she does the following: 1. Include sections for education, experience and honors. These three headings will serve him well in this venture — and they align pretty closely with the Common App format. 2. Pay attention to chronology, accuracy and clarity of descriptions. Your student should only include items that genuinely add something to her candidacy. 3. Take advantage of the extra space. If your student has captured a number of impressive national, state or local awards, and was unable to fit them in his Common App honors section, a resume presents a wonderful opportunity to tell the committee about these achievements in glorious detail. 4. Elaborate on work experiences in greater detail. This is particularly wise if her experiences relate to her field of study, or demonstrate leadership. The same goes for community service. If your student’s prospective colleges give him a black-and-white answer to the question of resume submission, simply follow the school’s directives. If one or more of his potential schools encourage enclosing a resume with his application, then go about creating one, remembering the tips outlined above. If your student plans on applying to a number of competitive schools this fall, chances are a resume will come in handy at some point during the application process. Therefore, it may be good idea to knock this task out prior to the frenetic start of college application season. Dave Bergman, Ed.D., is a co-founder of College Transitions, a team of college planning experts committed to guiding families through the college admissions process. He is also co-author of “The Enlightened College Applicant: A New Approach to the Search and Admissions Process.” Learn more at | SEPTEMBER 2019



Tales of a Third Grade Spit Ball BY BRUCE HAM

The second thing I remember is that the third graders were

swing or throw. I can run, but that was the extent of my

allowed to play in one game that season. Our team was up by

athletic prowess.

25 points so Coach Ancherico put the third string in. I was

I passed this genetic defect on to my three daughters. I

created dancers and singers, not soccer or basketball stars. I tried. I desperately wanted to regain my underwhelming youth sports career through my kids. I longed to spend Saturdays in

the point guard. We played at Horace Sisk Gymnasium. It felt like the Dean Dome to a small kid like me. There were, maybe, two minutes left. My buddy Steven threw the ball in to me. Seconds later, I heard a whistle. The ref, with a

a lawn chair by the soccer field.

condescending smile, yelled, “Traveling. Green

I distinctly remember my middle

ball!” I had forgotten to dribble.

daughter, the most petite of the lot,

It seemed like the entire gym

scoring a goal in the third grade

snickered, “Ahh, the little third grader

basketball league at the YMCA. It

forgot to dribble. Isn’t that cute.” It

was the highlight of our entire

was NOT cute. It was humiliating.

family’s attempt at athleticism.

My teammates weren’t happy.

I rose from the bleacher and

I had blown one of only two

tossed my arms in the air

offensive possessions we would

with hands clasped in victory

have that entire season.

fashion. The other parents

Paul did not spit on me that

congratulated me — all were

day, but it may have precipitated

shocked. A Ham getting the ball

his ongoing frustration the

typically meant turnover.

following week at practice when

It wasn’t long after that when

he launched a loogie onto my bright

this same child informed me she was

orange jersey.

packing up her Converses for good and

I am thankful that my kids were

swapping them out for ballet slippers. Daughter three picked clovers on the soccer field, cried at swim

never spat upon for their lack of talent. But maybe Paul did me a favor. I traded my team sports

meets and ducked on the basketball court when the ball came her

aspirations for running, and that has brought me a great

way. My attempts were futile.

deal of joy.

I could not be frustrated with my girls at their lack of enthusiasm for sports because I dropped out of the youth

Bruce Ham, who lives in Raleigh, started writing after losing

basketball league because of spit. That’s right, spit.

his wife and raising his three daughters on his own. He has

I was in third grade when I joined the church basketball team in

written a book, “Laughter, Tears and Braids,” about their

Fayetteville. I remember two things about that season. First: A kid

journey, and writes a blog about his family’s experiences at

named Paul spit on me during practice because I stunk at the game.



Image of boy courtesy of Event Horizon/ Image of basketball courtesy of Alexey Pushkin/


love to exercise, but I don’t play sports. I can’t dribble, shoot,

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n a lazy Sunday in 1799, while fishing in Little Meadow Creek on his family’s farmland in Cabarrus County, young Conrad Reed found a heavy, shiny rock in the water. The Reeds used it as a doorstop for three years until a jeweler in a Fayetteville market identified it as gold, and worth $3,600. That discovery would forever change the lives of the Reed family. THE VALUE OF GOLD Gold is a natural and rare element that is embedded in some quartz rock and brought to the surface through volcanic action. Known as the “eternal metal,” gold does not tarnish or corrode. It has been used for centuries in coinage, jewelry, art and medicine. Throughout recorded history, civilizations have fought over gold, which has long been associated with beauty, luxury and greed. Today, an ounce of gold is worth more than $1,400. STEEPED IN HISTORY From its earliest days of placer (surface) mining — when John Reed, Conrad’s father, organized a small operation in 1803 to extract gold nuggets from the soil — to eventual lode (underground) mining that began in 1831, Reed Gold Mine helped North Carolina lead the nation in gold production. It yielded over $1 million a year before California surpassed it during the famous Gold Rush of 1849. Reed Gold Mine ceased production in 1912 when prospectors failed to locate any more gold on the property, but families today can explore its tunnels that teemed with fervent miners laden with pickaxes, shovels and buckets over a century ago.

Explore Reed Gold Mine Pan for gold and tour the site of the first documented gold find in the US BY JANICE LEWINE



TOUR THE MINE Guided tours of the mine and stamp mill are offered Nov. 1-March 31. No fee is charged for admission or tours. Begin your tour at the visitor center, where the mine’s 113-year history unfolds in an impressive exhibit featuring restored excavation equipment and historical photographs. On display are dozens of gold artifacts, including jewelry, coins, place settings, serving spoons, a set of human teeth, and the helmet of an Apollo 17 astronaut, whose gold-coated visor provided protection against thermal radiation. Just past Little Meadow Creek, where you can view the actual placer pits dug near the creek bed in the early 1800s to locate gold nuggets, Linker Adit awaits (an adit is a horizontal tunnel running through the side of a hill). This is the entrance of Reed Gold Mine and where an outcropping of white quartz rock lured prospectors to dig deeper. Exploring Reed Gold Mine is a stirring experience. The confined, damp and dim mine is 50 feet deep and a constant 55 degrees. It’s easy to envision yesteryear’s miners, carrying oil lanterns for light, plunging further into the tunnels to unearth their treasure. Yet it contains beauty only found in a mine: water trickling down walls bulging with translucent quartz, timbers supporting the sides of chasms, and earthen-colored surfaces scarred by mining tools.

Fascinating sections of Reed Gold Mine include the gallery, a room that measures 35 feet high and where it is believed a large amount of gold was removed; Vein 5, where miners used hammers and chisels to form blasting holes filled with gunpowder for excavation; and the Linker Shaft Room, with its exploratory tunnel and iron bucket (called a “kibble”) that miners used to haul ore, equipment and themselves up and down the shaft. THE STAMP MILL AND OTHER REMNANTS Housed in a barnlike structure, Reed Gold Mine’s stamp mill — a marvel of machinery — crushed 5 tons of quartz a day to extract gold, which was then taken to the Charlotte Mint and melted into $2.50 and $5 federal coins. (The stamp mill on view is the restored version that was originally used at Coggins Mine in Montgomery County, and is the same model of mill that was used at Reed Gold Mine.) Other historic remnants dot the 830-acre landscape, including those of Brunerville, a village that contained the miners’ cabins, an office and a blacksmith shop; and the engine house, which powered other ore-crushing mills on the property. Reed Gold Mine was designated a National Historic Landmark in 1966. PAN FOR GOLD Gold panning is available April 1-Oct. 31, weather permitting, with a charge of $3 per pan for individuals and $2 per pan for groups of 10 or more that make reservations a month in advance. Panning is not available Nov. 1-March 31.

30TH ANNUAL GOLD PANNING COMPETITION Race against the clock during the 30th Annual Gold Panning Competition at Reed Gold Mine on Sept. 14. Experienced and novice competitors will receive pans containing sand and four gold nuggets, and they must remove as much sand as possible while leaving all four nuggets. Competitions are 10 a.m.-noon for experienced competitors, and 1-3 p.m. for novice competitors. Fees range $5-$15. Learn more about this event at events/30th-annual-gold-panning-competition-reed-gold-mine. IF YOU GO Reed Gold Mine is located at 9621 Reed Mine Rd. in Midland. Hours are Tuesday-Saturday, 9 a.m.-5 p.m. (closed Sundays, Mondays and most major holidays). As mentioned earlier, admission is free. Picnic tables are abundant, so pack a lunch and spend the day touring Reed Gold Mine and walking its 3 miles of scenic nature trails. Learn more at or call 704-721-4653.

OPPOSITE PAGE: A visitor pans for gold at Reed Gold Mine. ABOVE, LEFT TO RIGHT: The entrance to Reed Gold Mine, the chimney of the engine house, and the Morgan Shaft head frame. Photos courtesy of Janice Lewine | SEPTEMBER 2019




OUR PICKS “Peppa Pig’s Adventure” | Sept. 15 Join Peppa Pig on an exciting camping trip as Nick Jr.’s top-rated kids show comes to life on stage at 3 p.m. at the Durham Performing Arts Center. Pedro Pony, Suzy Sheep and Gerald Giraffe accompany Peppa and Daddy Pig on this outdoor adventure filled with singalong songs and life-size puppets. Safe and warm inside their tents, the group looks Images courtesy of North Carolina Symphony

forward to morning, when there will be muddy puddles to play in after a night of gentle rain. Purchase tickets, $29.50 and up, at or Durham Performing Arts Center is located at 123 Vivian St., Durham.

North Carolina Symphony Sensory-Friendly Concert | Sept. 14 It’s a day of music that everyone can enjoy when the North Carolina Symphony hosts its first sensory-friendly concert, “Family Fun 4 Everyone,” at 1 p.m. in Raleigh’s Meymandi Concert Hall. Children and adults with autism, sensory sensitivities and other special needs can listen to well-known music in a relaxed atmosphere, and are invited to sing along during the performance. Guests may take fidget toys, noise-canceling headphones and other assistive devices to the event, as well as leave and Photos courtesy of Dan Tsantilis

re-enter the concert hall as needed. Wheelchair seating, American Sign Language interpretation, Braille and largeprint programs will be available. Purchase tickets for $5 per person at or Meymandi Concert Hall is located at 2 E. South St., Raleigh.

Farmers Market Fall Festival | Sept. 28 Logo courtesy of Cary Farmers Market

Looking for fun on a crisp fall day? The Farmers Fall Festival, 9 a.m.-3 p.m., on West Chatham Street in downtown Cary invites families to taste the season’s flavors from local vendors and food trucks, and enjoy craft booths, live music and a pie-eating contest. Kids activities include pumpkin painting, an “Eat a Rainbow” scavenger hunt, interactive exhibits and student performances. Admission is FREE.





FESTIVALS African-American Cultural Festival Sept. 1 – Fayetteville Street, downtown Raleigh. 1-10 p.m. FREE. Celebrate AfricanAmerican culture and history with an art gallery walk, vendors, kids activities, food and more.

SPARKcon takes place Sept 13-15 in downtown Raleigh.

GeekCraft Expo Sept. 7-8 – Durham Convention Center, 301 W. Morgan St., Durham. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Saturday; 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Sunday. Advance registration required for free admission; $2/adults at the door. Take the family for handmade, geek-themed crafts. Kids can enjoy gaming, superhero appearances and more.

Photo courtesy of Schoolhouse of Wonder

North Carolina Kid Expo Sept. 7-8 – Exposition Center at the North Carolina State Fairgrounds, 1025 Blue Ridge Rd., Raleigh. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. $10/adult, $5/child. A family four-pack is $25. The expo features local and national companies that have products

Photo courtesy of Dan Hacker

Raleigh Greek Festival Sept. 6-8 – Jim Graham Building at the North Carolina State Fairgrounds, 1025 Blue Ridge Rd., Raleigh. 5-10 p.m. Friday; 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Saturday; 11 a.m.-6 p.m. Sunday. $3/adults, $2/ages 13-18 and seniors. Free for ages 12 and younger. The 38th annual Raleigh Greek Festival features folk dancing, live music, authentic cuisine, a marketplace and more.

and services catered to kids and families, hands-on activities, youth performances and more. Canes 5K Sept. 8 – PNC Arena, 1400 Edwards Mill Rd., Raleigh. 9:30 a.m. $15-$50/person. The event includes a 5K race around the arena and surrounding areas, 100- and 200-yard kids dashes, inflatables and appearances by Stormy, the Pepsi Storm Squad and current Hurricanes players.

Taste of Soul NC Seafood Edition Sept. 8 – Durham Central Park, 501 Foster St., Durham. 4-8 p.m. FREE. Take the family for fresh lobster, shrimp, crab cakes, flounder, catfish, salmon croquets and more. Kids activities, games and a DJ round out the fun. Grape Day at the State Farmers Market Sept. 13 – State Farmers Market, 1201 Agriculture St., Raleigh. 11 a.m.-1 p.m. FREE. Grape Day features fresh North Carolina grapes, desserts and more. markets/raleigh/promos.htm. SPARKcon Sept. 13-15 – Raleigh Warehouse District, St., downtown Raleigh. See the website for hours. FREE. Celebrate the best in creative expression at this three-day festival that features live entertainment, hands-on activities, food trucks and more. City of Oaks Pirate Fest Sept. 14 – Dorothea Dix Park, 2105 Umstead Dr., Raleigh. 10 a.m.-6 p.m. FREE. Learn more about the history of pirates in North Carolina, play swashbuckling games, make pirate crafts, meet Blackbeard and more. Register online.

Celebrate Schoolhouse of Wonder’s 30th anniversary with S’More Stories: A Live Storytelling Event on Sept. 14 at West Point on the Eno Park in Durham.

Dog Day in the Park Sept. 14 – Sugg Farm at Bass Lake Park, 2401 Grigsby Ave., Holly Springs. 10 a.m.-1 p.m. FREE. Families and their four-legged friends enjoy

clinics, entertainment, adoption opportunities, as well as local animal businesses and vendors. East Meets West Festival Sept. 14 – Park West Village, Village Market Place, Morrisville. 11 a.m.-4 p.m. FREE. Celebrate Morrisville, one of Wake County’s most diverse community, with a day of food, culture and music from around the world. Kids can enjoy face painting and a bounce house. Knightdale Arts and Education Festival Sept. 14 – Knightdale Station Park, 810 N. First Ave., Knightdale. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. FREE. This festival focuses S.T.E.A.M. (science, technology, engineering, art and math) and features interactive activities, nonprofit organizations and more. A concert takes place from 5:30-9 p.m. and also features food trucks. S’More Stories: A Live Storytelling Event for Families Sept. 14 – West Point on the Eno Park, 5101 N. Foxboro St., Durham. 5:30-9 p.m. FREE. Celebrate Schoolhouse of Wonder’s 30th anniversary by hearing tales from nationally renowned storyteller Raymond Christian and other local raconteurs. Enjoy outdoor activities, including fire-making, whittling, tomahawkthrowing and more. Wind down with freshly made s’mores around a bonfire. Register online. | SEPTEMBER 2019


CALENDAR SEPTEMBER 2019 Fiestas Patrias en UniRumba Sept. 15 – Compare Foods Parking Lot, 2000 Avondale Dr., Durham. Noon-6 p.m. FREE. Celebrate Latino culture in Durham. NC Sugar Rush Sept. 15 – City Market, downtown Raleigh. 1-5 p.m. FREE. Raleigh’s All-Dessert Food Rodeo features more than 20 dessert vendors offering something for everyone, including pets. Hillsborough Hog Day Sept. 20-21 – River Park, 114 E. Margaret Lane, Hillsborough. 6-10 p.m. Friday; 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Saturday. FREE. Enjoy local bands, arts and crafts vendors, a car show, kids area, contests, games and a barbecue cook-off contest featuring veteran cooking teams. Capital City Bikefest Sept. 20-22 – Various locations in downtown Raleigh. 9 a.m.-10 p.m. Friday and Saturday; 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Sunday. See the website for fees and a complete schedule. Celebrate the motorcycle lifestyle with stunt shows, specialty rides, a car show and more. BugFest Sept. 21 – North Carolina Museum of Natural Sciences, 11 W. Jones St., Raleigh. 9 a.m.-5 p.m. FREE. Celebrate the world of bugs and creepy crawlies with exhibits, crafts, games and activities. Interact with entomologists and other scientists, and sample buggy dishes prepared by local chefs at Cafe Insecta. From 5-7 p.m., Jones Street, Bicentennial Plaza and Edenton Street will be teeming with activities, bug stations and a street carnival. Creedmoor Music Festival Sept. 21 – Main Street, Creedmoor. 10 a.m.-6 p.m. FREE. Family fun for all ages includes more than 100 delicious food and craft vendors, kids activities, live demonstrations, and all genres of music from local and regional bands. events/creedmoor-music-festival. CenterFest Arts Festival Sept. 21-22 – 120 Morris St., downtown Durham. 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Saturday with extended


entertainment from 6-11 p.m.; 11 a.m.-5 p.m. Sunday. $5 suggested donation. This annual arts festival located in Durham’s historic city center showcases 145 juried visual artists from across the U.S. and 600 performing artists from North Carolina. Food, continuous music and entertainment on five stages, and kids activities round out the event. Fall Harvest Celebration at Yates Mill Sept. 21 – Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 11 a.m.-3 p.m. FREE. Enjoy storytellers, a scavenger hunt for all ages, craft demonstrations, antique vehicle and tool displays, and food vendors. Tour Historic Yates Mill, Wake County’s last operable water-powered gristmill, where costumed interpreters lead half-hour tours and conduct corn-grinding demonstrations. Tours are $5/adult, $3 ages 7-16. Children ages 6 years old and younger are FREE. fallharvest.aspx. Good Neighbor Day Sept. 21 – E. Carroll Joyner Park, 701 Harris Rd., Wake Forest. 1-4 p.m. FREE. Celebrate diversity in Wake Forest with live performances, traditional cuisine and family entertainment. wakeforestnc. gov/citizen-engagement/community-calendar/ good-neighbor-day. Groove in the Garden Sept. 21 – Raleigh Little Theatre’s Rose Garden and Stephenson Amphitheatre, 301 Pogue St., Raleigh. 2-8 p.m. $15/person advance tickets, $20/person at the door. Free for ages 5 and younger. Groove to the music from live bands and enjoy a vendor village, kids zone and food trucks. North Carolina Jerk Fest Sept. 21 – West Point on the Eno, 5101 N. Roxboro St., Durham. 11:30 a.m.-7:30 p.m. FREE. Take the family for Caribbean food, live music, a kids zone, bounce house, face painter and more. 7th Annual Mama Afrika Festival Sept. 22 – Knightdale Station Park, 810 First Ave., Knightdale. 1-7 p.m. FREE. This cultural expo features live entertainment, a kids zone, food vendors, games and more.


Grand Opening Celebration: David R. Kahn Community Campus Sept. 22 - David R. Kahn Community Campus, 12804 Norwood Rd., Raleigh. 1:30-4:30 p.m. FREE. Take the family for a balloon artists, face painting, carnival games, obstacle courses, arts and crafts and a magician to celebrate the grand opening of the David R. Kahn Community Campus in Raleigh. Register online. Pittsboro Pepper Festival Sept. 22 – Downtown Pittsboro. 3-6 p.m. $5-$25/person. Delicious pepper-themed dishes take center stage at this annual event that features local artisans, farmers, kids activities and more. Apple Day Sept. 26 – State Farmers Market, 1201 Agriculture St., Raleigh. 11 a.m.-1 p.m. FREE. Celebrate all things apple at the State Farmers Market. raleigh/promos.htm. Benson Mule Days Sept. 26-29 – Downtown Benson, 500 S. Market St., Benson. See website for fees. Take the family for rodeos, a mule-pulling contest, arts and crafts, vendors, carnival rides, street performers and bluegrass shows. Wide Open Bluegrass Festival Sept. 27-28 – Downtown Raleigh. See website for hours. Free-$60. This familyfriendly urban bluegrass festival features a dance tent, workshops and exhibit hall with instruments and gear in the Raleigh Convention Center, food vendors, a youth stage, juried arts market area, and more. Dragon Boat Festival Sept. 28 – Booth Amphitheatre, 8003 Regency Pkwy., Cary. 11 a.m.-6 p.m. $5/person advance tickets; $8/person at the door. Free for ages 12 and younger. Enjoy live performances, cultural exhibits, children’s activities, dragon boat racing and more. Taste ethnic foods and delicacies created by local chefs. programs-and-events/dragonboatnc/#event. Farmers Fall Festival Sept. 28 – Downtown Cary. 9 a.m.-3 p.m. FREE. Welcome the fall harvest season with

local produce, kids activities, a scavenger hunt and a pie-eating contest. FREE. International Food Festival Sept. 28 – J. Ashley Wall Towne Square, Cyprus and Third Streets, Wendell. 11 a.m.-5 p.m. FREE. Sample traditional cuisine from a dozen countries, and enjoy live entertainment, games and inflatables. Kids Together Walk, Run and Roll for Inclusiveness Sept. 28 – Kids Together Playground, 111 Thurston Dr., Cary. 10 a.m.-11:30 a.m. $15/ family, $5/individual. Take part in a 1.4-mile walk for inclusiveness. Registration and activities begin at 10 a.m. and the walk begins at 10:30 a.m. Enjoy refreshments, games, raffle and a decorating station. All ages and abilities welcome. Register online. eventsnnews.htm#september. Mumkin Fest Sept. 28 – Knightdale Station Park, 810 N. First Ave., Knightdale. All ages. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. FREE. Mums and pumpkins are celebrated at this festival featuring live music and food trucks. Oktoberfest Sept. 28 – Lafayette Village, 8450 Honeycutt Rd., Raleigh. Noon-5 p.m. FREE. This Germaninspired festival features live music and food, as well as the popular wiener dog races throughout the day. Storytelling Festival Sept. 28 – Historic Oak View County Park, 4028 Carya Dr., Raleigh. 11 a.m.-4 p.m. FREE. Hear stories from professional storytellers in this event presented in partnership with Wake County Public Libraries. Youngsville Fall Festival Sept. 28 – 125 U.S. 1-A, Youngsville. 9 a.m.-5 p.m. FREE. Welcome fall’s arrival with a food truck rodeo, car show, face painting, a craft show and more. Carrboro Music Festival Sept. 29 – Carrboro Town Hall, 301 W. Main St., Carrboro. 2-10 p.m. FREE. Take the family for live music, crafts and food.



DAILY 1 SUNDAY Movies Under the Moon: “Zootopia.” The Carolina Inn, 211 Pittsboro St., Chapel Hill. 6:30 p.m. FREE. Enjoy a familyfriendly movie under the stars on a large screen. Play games in the courtyard prior to the start of the movie at 8 p.m.

2 MONDAY The Carying Place Labor Day Race for Home. Koka Booth Amphitheater, 8003 Regency Pkwy., Cary. 7-10 a.m. $10-$40/ person. Take part in a 10K, 5K or 1-mile fun race. Live entertainment, fitness dance routines and exhibitors round out the fun. Registration required online. Exploring Habitats. Harris Lake County Park, 2112 County Park Dr., New Hill. 10-11 a.m. FREE. Hike to investigate the animals and learn the four survival needs of all living things. Meet at the platform in the Educational Garden. All ages. Advance online registration required. Family Wildlife Series: Get Ahead of Our Watershed. Blue Jay Point County Park, 3200 Pleasant Union Church Rd., Raleigh. 2-3 p.m. FREE. Join Blue Jay staff to learn about the watershed through activities, games and music. Suitable for ages 5 and older. Registration required. Mill Heritage and Local History Tour. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 2-3 p.m. $5/adult, $3 ages 7-16. Free for ages 6 and younger. Watch a brief slideshow, then explore the inner workings of the mill and witness the power of water as it turns the milling machinery. Registration encouraged. Tickets are available at the visitors center.

3 TUESDAY Collecting Carolina. North Carolina Museum of History, 5 E. Edenton St., Raleigh. 9 a.m.-5 p.m. FREE. View a

handmade chest used by North Carolina’s first female legislator, a dance outfit worn by Chuck Davis, a possible ID tag from the Civil War, a woman’s swimsuit from the 1890s, a sampling of puppets and props used for teaching dental hygiene, and more. collecting-carolina.

4 WEDNESDAY Crabtree Casters. Lake Crabtree County Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville. 6:30-8 p.m. FREE. Join park staff for an informal fishing experience. Take your own pole or borrow one through the tackle loaner program. Bait and basic instruction provided. All ages. Participants ages 16 and older must have a valid North Carolina fishing license to participate. Registration required. A Side of History — Feathers, Fashion, and Conservation. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 11 a.m.-noon. FREE. Learn about the Carolina Parakeet and the passage of the Migratory Bird Act. Make a craft. Ages 5 and older with adult. Register online. Storytime for Tots: “Owls.” Lake Crabtree County Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville. 1-2 p.m. FREE. Read a story about the barn owl and learn what makes them different from other birds. Hoot like an owl, discover what they eat by examining owl pellets, and make an owl mask. Ages 2-6.

5 THURSDAY Nature Fun-Days. Stevens Nature Center, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 10 a.m.noon. $9/resident, $12/nonresident. Ages 5-8 hike, make projects and engage in nature activities. Register online.

6 FRIDAY Centennial Cinema Series: “Avengers Endgame.” Lake Raleigh Meadows,

Campus Shore Dr., Raleigh. 6-9:30 p.m. FREE. Enjoy a sunset movie at Lake Raleigh. Take a picnic blanket, lawn chairs and a nonperishable food donation. Gates open at 6 p.m.; the movie begins at 7:30 p.m. Collecting Carolina. See Sept. 3.

7 SATURDAY Climb for a Cure for DMD. TreeRunner Raleigh, 12804 Norwood Rd., Raleigh. 9 a.m.-11 p.m. $44/adult, $39/child. Enjoy a full day of games, activities and programs in the fight against Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. Registration required online. Dig For Duke. Southern Sand Volleyball, 6175 Old Jenks Rd., Apex. 9 a.m.-3 p.m. $60. Take part in a 2-v-2 beach volleyball tournament to raise money for Duke Children’s Hospital. All ages. Register online. Saturdays at the Old Mill Tours. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 1-3 p.m. $5/adult, $3 ages 7-16. Free for ages 6 and younger. Take a half-hour tour to view the main power drive and milling machinery while exploring the mill’s history and aspects of its preservation. Registration encouraged. Tickets are available inside the visitors center. Touch a Truck. Sanderford Road Center, 2623 Sanderford Rd., Raleigh. 11 a.m.2 p.m. FREE. All ages see, touch and safely explore favorite trucks and heavy machinery, and meet the personnel who protect, serve and build the Raleigh community. The event is horn-free from 11 a.m.-noon.

8 SUNDAY Geocaching 101 on the American Tobacco Trail. American Tobacco Trail, 1305 White Oak Church Rd., Apex. 1:30-3 p.m. FREE. Learn how to use traditional GPS units to find real geocaches hidden along the trail. Wear comfortable shoes and take a water bottle Ages 6 and older. Meet at the White Oak parking area.

Advance registration required online.

9 MONDAY Kids Discover Nature: Monarch Magic. Harris Lake County Park, 2112 County Park Dr., New Hill. 11 a.m.-noon. FREE. Learn how different butterflies survive the winter and hopefully see a Monarch adult or caterpillar. Make your own butterfly to take home. Ages 1-6 with accompanying adult. Meet at the Cypress Shelter. Advance registration required online. Parent/Child Clay Workshop. Durham Arts Council Clay Studio, 1058 W. Club Blvd., Durham. 10-11:30 a.m. or 4-5:30 p.m. $15/child. Parent and child create ceramic artwork together. Register online.

10 TUESDAY Nature Nerds. Lake Crabtree County Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville. 9-10 a.m. FREE. Join park staff to discover amphibians, birds, insects, spiders and more. Help collect data for the Natural Resource Inventory Database while increasing identification skills. Ages 9 and older. Registration required. Parent/Child Clay Workshop. See Sept. 9. 4-5:30 p.m.

11 WEDNESDAY Park Tales: Harvest Time for the Ingalls. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 11 a.m.-noon. FREE. Learn about the farm chores the Ingalls family had to tackle and what they did to get ready for winter. Discover how they tended to their farm animals, collected and stored fall fruits, and prepared for the county fair. All ages with adult. Registration required.

12 THURSDAY Beyond Curie. North Carolina Museum of Natural Sciences, 11 W. Jones St., Raleigh. 9 a.m-5 p.m. FREE. View an | SEPTEMBER 2019


CALENDAR SEPTEMBER 2019 exhibit of 40 inspiring female scientists, mathematicians and engineers who made incredible advances in their fields. Collecting Carolina. See Sept. 3.

13 FRIDAY Centennial Cinema Series: “The Secret Life of Pets 2.” See Sept. 6. Yates By Night: Raccoon Platoon. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 7-8:30 p.m. FREE. Enjoy a raccoon-themed activity and search outdoors for these ring-tailed, night mammals. Ages 5 and older with adult.

14 SATURDAY Caterpillarology. North Carolina Botanical Garden, 100 Old Mason Farm Rd., Chapel Hill. 10:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. $9/child member, $10/child nonmember. Meet live caterpillars, hear their stories, learn what they need to survive and explore the garden for these insects and their plant partners. Register online. Healthy Moms Healthy Babies Community Resource Fair. North Carolina Cooperative Extension Office, 721 Foster St., Durham. 1-3 p.m. FREE. Pregnant and new mothers

learn about maternal and child health, parenting, breastfeeding and more. Enjoy food, giveaways and raffles for gift baskets. Sponsored by March of Dimes and hosted by Duke Family Medicine Center. Rolesville Fall Movie Series: “Ferdinand.” Rolesville Middle School, 4700 Burlington Mills Rd., Rolesville. 7:30 p.m. FREE. Take a chair or blanket to enjoy a family-friendly movie on the football field. Concessions available. Saturdays at the Old Mill Tours. See Sept. 7.

15 SUNDAY Babies On The MOVE: Master Movers 7 Months-New Walkers. Open Arts, 1222 Copeland Oaks Dr., Morrisville. 11-11:45 a.m. $24. Learn individualized ways to foster motor development for a child, as well as carry positions, best positions for a baby, how to help a child learn to crawl, walk and more. Register online. babiesonthemoverdu. Babies On The MOVE: Mini Movers 0-6 Months. Open Arts, 1222 Copeland Oaks Dr., Morrisville. 10-10:45 a.m. $24. Learn individualized ways to foster motor development for a child, as well as tummy time alternatives, best positions

for a baby, how to help a child learn to sit, roll and more. Register online. babiesonthemoverdu.

16 MONDAY Tiny Tots: ABCs in Nature. Crowder County Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd., Apex. 10:30-11 a.m. FREE. Ages 18 months-3 years with an adult practice their ABCs and develop fine motor skills through games and hands-on activities. Play a letter game and go on a scavenger hunt. Meet at the Upper Pavilion. Registration required online.

17 TUESDAY Homeschool/Track-Out Program: The Fungus Among Us. Lake Crabtree County Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville. 9-11 a.m. FREE. Ages 6-12 discover the world of mushrooms and learn about these organisms that are neither plant nor animal. Learn how to identify common types of fungi and discover the important role they play in the ecosystem. Go on a mushroom hunt. Nature Peekers: “Tickly Prickly.” Blue Jay Point County Park, 3200 Pleasant Union Church Rd., Raleigh. 10:30-11 a.m.

FREE. Read “Tickly Prickly” by Bonny Becker and investigate various natural objects through the sense of touch. Ages 18 months-3 years. Register online.

18 WEDNESDAY Author Visits: Stuart Gibbs. Quail Ridge Books, 4209 Lassiter Mill Rd., Raleigh. 7 p.m. FREE. Robert Gibbs discusses his latest book, “Charlie Thorne and the Last Equation,” for ages 8-12. Purchase the book from Quail Ridge Books to reserve two seats for the event and a ticket for the signing line. Crabtree Casters. See Sept. 4.

19 THURSDAY Tots on Trails. Stevens Nature Center, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 10-11 a.m. $8/ resident, $10/nonresident. Ages 1-5 with adult delight in their discoveries of nature. Register online.

20 FRIDAY Centennial Cinema Series: “Toy Story 4.” See Sept. 6. Night Out in Nature. Stevens Nature Center, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 6-9 p.m. FREE. Kids spend a night out in nature making memories and new friends in

CALENDAR POLICY The Carolina Parent calendar lists local and regional activities for children and families. Visit to submit an event for consideration by the 6th of the month for the next month’s issue. Please call ahead to confirm dates and times. This calendar may include some events not intended for young children. Find more events at





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this old-fashioned, camp-style program. Register online.

21 SATURDAY Bringing in the Harvest. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 11 a.m.-5 p.m. FREE. Learn how farmers harvested crops like wheat before the invention of mechanized harvesters. Try threshing wheat by hand and make a craft to take home. Drop-in program. Costumed Corn-Grinding Tours. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 10 a.m.-noon. $5/adult, $3 ages 7-16. Free for ages 6 and younger. Step back in time with 19th-century costumed interpreters and watch the millstones grind corn into meal. Registration encouraged. Gail Parkins Memorial Ovarian Cancer Walk & 5K Run. Jessie O. Sanderson High School, 5500 Dixon Dr., Raleigh.

7:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. $40. Enjoy a family-friendly event on the Shelley Lake greenway in support of Ovarian Cancer Awareness. Registration fee includes a T-shirt and a lunch ticket. Register online. Stroller Barre Fall Pop Up and Nature Scavenger Hunt. Piney Wood Park, 400 E. Woodcroft Pkwy., Durham. 9-10:30 a.m. $5. Take part in a pop-up Stroller Barre class followed by a nature scavenger hunt for kids. Suitable for pregnant mamas. Take a sturdy stroller, water, mat or towel, and snacks. Meet at the pavilion.

22 SUNDAY Bringing in the Harvest. See Sept. 21. 8 a.m.-5 p.m. Costumed Corn Grinding Tours. See Sept. 21. 1-4 p.m. Family Features: Build a Beaver. Crowder County Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd., Apex. 1-2 p.m. FREE. Discover the parts of a

beaver and what beavers like to eat. Test your beaver knowledge in a round of trivia and take a walk in the park to search for beavers. All ages with adult. Meet at the Upper Pavilion. Live Short Play: “Becoming a More Perfect Union.” Cary Downtown Library Courtyard, 310 S. Academy St., Cary. 3-4:15 p.m. FREE. In celebration of Constitution Week, the Daughters of the American Revolution present the original production featuring Town of Cary Mayor Harold Weinbrecht and other local notables. Enjoy an opening greeting by WRAL’s David Crabtree. Take a chair. RSVP for this event by emailing

23 MONDAY Discovery Table: The Autumnal Equinox. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 8:30 a.m.-5 p.m. FREE. Discover how and why the

equinox occurs, and learn about seasonal folklore and related historical traditions. All ages. Drop-in program.

24 TUESDAY Animal Detectives (TACO). Lake Crabtree County Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville. 10- 11:30 a.m. FREE. Help solve the many mysteries along the Old Beech Nature Trail. Registration required. Discovery Table: The Autumnal Equinox. See Sept. 23. Nature Play Day. Blue Jay Point County Park, 3200 Pleasant Union Church Rd., Raleigh. 10 a.m.-noon. FREE. Discover art through free-play activities. Ages 3-7.

25 WEDNESDAY Discovery Table: The Autumnal Equinox. See Sept. 23. | SEPTEMBER 2019


CALENDAR SEPTEMBER 2019 Kids Get Crafty: Autumn Leaves. Crowder County Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd., Apex. 11 a.m.-noon. FREE. Make a craft inspired by the colors of autumn leaves. Materials provided. All ages with adult. Meet at the Cardinal Shelter. Marvelous Migration. Harris Lake County Park, 2112 County Park Dr., New Hill. 2-3 p.m. FREE. Learn about the longdistance movement of migratory birds. Take a hike to look for feathered friends. All ages. Meet at the Cypress Shelter. Advance registration required online. Nature Stories: “Dandelion Adventures.” Blue Jay Point County Park, 3200 Pleasant Union Church Rd., Raleigh. 1-2 p.m. FREE. Read the book by L. Patricia Kite and learn how Mother Nature distributes her seeds. Ages 3-5 with adult. Register online.

26 THURSDAY Collecting Carolina. See Sept. 3.

27 FRIDAY Natural Explorations: Forest Bathing. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 9-10 a.m. FREE. “Shinrin-yoku” is a Japanese healing technique that means “taking in the forest

atmosphere.” Take a walk in a relaxed way to receive calming, rejuvenating and restorative benefits. Ages 8 and older with adult. “Dumb & Dumber” 25th Anniversary Movie Party. Lake Raleigh Meadows, Campus Shore Dr., Raleigh. 6-9:30 p.m. FREE. Celebrate the 25th anniversary of the beloved movie. Enjoy free bowl cuts, a Most Annoying Sound Off and a costume contest. Gates open at 6 p.m.; the movie begins at 7:30 p.m.

28 SATURDAY Beginning Group Voice. Durham Arts Council, 120 Morris St, Durham. 9:30-11 a.m. $30/ person. Learn vocal technique and how to apply it to simple songs in group exercises. Register online. Disney Pin Trading 4HR Event. Stanford L. Warren Branch, Durham County Library, 1201 Fayetteville St., Durham. 1-5 p.m. FREE. Trade Disney pins in an event hosted by two Facebook groups: TriangleNCpinTraders and Trading Across the Carolinas. Family Wildlife Series: Calling All Crows. Blue Jay Point County Park, 3200 Pleasant Union Church Rd., Raleigh. 10-11 a.m. FREE. Learn about crows through a hike and nature activities.

Suitable for ages 5 and older. Register online. Recreational Adventures: Paddle the Pond. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 11 a.m.-noon. FREE. Learn basic canoeing skills and head out to explore the pond’s many features as seen only from the water. Canoes, paddles and life jackets provided. Ages 5 and older with adult. FREE. Each canoe holds 1-4 people. Register online. Saturdays at the Old Mill Tours. See Sept. 7. Take A Child Outside: Turtle Talk. Lake Crabtree County Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville. 1-3 p.m. FREE. Learn about the Eastern Box Turtle. Meet Lake Crabtree’s adopted turtle, Shel Silverstein, and join park staff on a box turtle survey. Search for wild turtles in their natural habitat. Ages 6 and older with adult. Register online.

29 SUNDAY Get to Know Hawks, Eagles and Owls. Harris Lake County Park, 2112 County Park Dr., New Hill. 2-3:30 p.m. FREE. North Carolina is home to eagles, hawks, owls and falcons. Learn about the raptors in the park, meet some of them up close and take a short hike to look for them.

Meet at the Longleaf Shelter. All ages. Advance registration required online. Mill Heritage and Local History Tour. See Sept. 2.

30 MONDAY All About Beavers. American Tobacco Trail, 1309 New Hill-Olive Chapel Rd., Apex. 11 a.m.-12:30 p.m. FREE. Discover the special adaptations of beavers through the park’s “Build a Beaver” program and hike to the Beaver Creek bridge to look for them. Meet at the New Hill Parking Area. All ages with adult. Advance registration required online. Field School: Birds of a Feather. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 10:30 a.m.-noon. FREE. Explore the birds found around the millpond and learn about their diverse habitats through fun activities. Ages 7-14. Registration required. Kid Jump. Defy Gravity, 4300 Emperor Blvd., #250, Durham. 9-10 a.m. $9/child. Ages 6 and younger enjoy a special hour for jumping. Register online.

FACES & PLACES Swathi (3) shines like a sunflower at Dorothea Dix Park’s Destination SunFest in Raleigh this past July.

Submit high-resolution photos of your kids having fun in the Triangle and beyond at



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Carolina Parent Raleigh Sep 2019  

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