a number of people had contacted me on Facebook or had sent me text messages asking to get coffee or lunch at some point. As I spent more time at UNC and continued to work with my counselor, I gradually felt fewer butterflies in my stomach when I walked into a fraternity house party or a club on a Saturday night. More and more, I sensed that people didn’t define me as a weird kid who stuck out in every social situation. Instead, they defined me as a Virginia native who loved outdoor concerts, had traveled to seven other countries, and aspired to attend law school. Asperger’s Syndrome will never disappear from my life, but now it is just an occasional irritant, not a constant problem. Like me, Hank has seen dramatic improvement in his communication skills as a result of the professional help he has received. “He’s just so visually creative and technically savvy, and more and more people are seeing that,” says Laurie. “He just has a certain flair about him. When you talk to him, you forget that he even has an autism-related disorder. You don’t think of him as a kid with Asperger’s. He’s just Hank.” Shortly before leaving for college, Hank decided to show the flair Laurie describes to the entire Cary High student body. From an early age, he has idolized Michael Jackson. When he heard the news of his death back in 2009, he couldn’t believe his ears. “No matter how many TV stations and websites said it was true, it just didn’t seem like it could be for real,” he said. The next spring, he decided to pay his respects to the King of Pop with an impersonation routine for the school’s “Mr. Cary” talent show. It took a little while for Hank’s family to warm up to the idea. “My mom and dad told me everyone would laugh at me,” he says. “But I told them it’s okay if they do, everyone’s entitled to their own opinions.” When the big night came, Hank’s parents still worried about teasing and taunting, but that did not happen. Instead, the performance was met with an auditorium full of cheers. During the weeks after the show, other students he had never even met told him what a great job he’d done. “It felt awesome,” he recalls. “It was like being a celebrity.” Hank admits it hasn’t been quite as easy to find the nerve show his performance to the other students at Wake Tech. “I’ve shown a few of the guys in my art for games class, and they liked it.” He says. “I’ve still got awhile to be here and show some other people, and I know I eventually will.” Asperger’s and autism do not have to define who you are. If you live in the Triangle area, you can find out more about Laurie Nederveen’s services via her website at www.AspiringAspies.com. College students all across the country can visit collegeautismspectrum.com for a list of numerous referrals and coping strategies. As Hank prepares to go back to his studies, he has a few parting words for other college students dealing with an ASD. “Just don’t give up, and keep following your dreams,” he says with a heart-stopping smile. “If I had given up on my dreams, I never would have felt so great after my Michael Jackson tribute, and I wouldn’t have had all the great opportunities for such a hands-on education here at Wake Tech. I just wouldn’t have been nearly as happy.” Laurie has just one thing to add. “In college and in life, you might run across people who seem quirky, but that doesn’t mean you should blow them off,” she says. “Take a little time to get to know them. I guarantee you will be glad you did.” ____________________________________________________ Anne Brenner is working on a degree in communication studies with a focus on media and production studies at the University of North Carolina.
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U the Magazine | April-May 2011
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