Volume 63, Issue 6, April 1, 2023

Varsity Girls Basketball Win CCS Championship

Hanson Han SportS Editor

For the first time since the 1990s,the Mills High School Girls Varsity Basketball team won the Division III CCS Championship. Team captain Serena Mezzetta (12) was ecstatic about the team’s win, stating that everyone on the team is feeling great. She explained that they have really high expectations for next year and mainly credits their success to a strong team effort.

For Mezzetta, her Freshman and Junior season ended with a loss in the CCS Championship game. Her Sophomore season was cut short due to Covid-19. She is glad that she is able to end her high school career with a win, with all her hard work finally resulting in something tangible. Being a contender for CCS is already a difficult feat as is, given that there are more than 1,000 teams vying for a playoff spot. Our girls team has done the unimaginable and made it to the championships three times, winning the most recent one.

The road to the championship was not easy. It began when the Lady Vikings won a long hard battle over the Jefferson Grizzlies, winning 57-38. In the championship game against the Santa Cruz Cardinals, our Vikings held a strong lead,

the score being 32-26 at halftime. However, the Cardinals were able to come back to make the score 47-47 with six minutes left in the game. At the final stretch of the game, our Vikings pulled through and beat the Cardinals 66-52. Star player Michelle Tang (11) scored 28 points, 18 of them 3-pointers. Tang’s performance eventually helped win the votes of many to earn her the title of Bay Area Athlete of the Week.

The Cardinals were a real threat coming into the season. This season marked their second championship appearance in the last three years. The Cardinals beat Aptos in 2021 to win the CCS Championship. In 2022, they lost to our Vikings in the semifinals. With Santa Cruz looking for revenge in this year’s championship game, they fell short after a long hard-fought battle. Our Vikings were ecstatic with this win, given that they have made it to CCS two times prior, only to lose in the big game. Mezzetta expressed her excitement, saying that, “I really feel as if my hard work has paid off. I’ve been playing since Freshman year, coming so close to winning everything. I’m so glad I was finally able to get my talents recognized, and get the championship I know my team deserves.”

Our Viking’s overall record on the season was 20-8, going 9-3 in

league play. They finished 1st in the PAL South League. Next year, the

team still has high hopes, with Tang looking to lead the team next year. With many next year starters already getting plenty of playing time this year, Mills is looking to return a very experienced and talented roster.

When asked what the main change was from last year to this year, Mezzetta stated that the team was overall much more confident this year. Last year, the team was never able to beat Mill’s rival school, Capuchino. Their season was also riddled with injuries, causing star players to miss considerable amounts of time. This meant that they didn’t have enough playing time and experience throughout the regular season, causing them to be thrown into the postseason without much practice beforehand. However, this year, they were able to beat Capuchino, drastically boosting team morale and confidence. Our main game changer was keeping all of our players healthy and able to play throughout the regular season. Unlike last season, our starters were ready to play with plenty of practice beforehand. Mezzetta stated that, “Many of our players were injured coming into the postseason. We had a real shot at winning, but the timing of things just weren’t in our favor.”

This also resulted in Mills’ coach, Dave Matsu, winning the Central Coast Section Honor Coach Award. This wasn’t the only celebration Matsu had during this time. He and his wife were celebrating their 25th wedding anniversary. This ended up becoming a perfect storybook ending for a coach that led his team to the championships. Matsu is going to be looking to get many victories for many years more. Matsu has been with the Vikings for 18 years, being a head coach for 17 years.

After their win, they lost in the NorCal Finals, ending their very fruitful season. The team will continue to be motivated, and is looking to create a threat to all the other teams in the CCS for years to come. Mezzetta states, “There is a possibility that this could be the start of a dynasty, if our players continue to develop and our underclassmen step up and improve throughout the years. We can make a real impact in the league for years to come.” Hopes are high for the returning players, with many of them confident in their abilities to repeat as CCS champions. Michelle Tang and Riley Dela Fuente look to lead the Lady Vikings next year establish Mills as a perennial powerhouse.

DeAn ChrIstIAn

LADY VIKINGS: Girls varsity basketball team pose with their trophy after championship victory.

lADy V k ngs InstAgrAm

LADY VIKINGS: Mills Varsity Girls celebrate Basketball Victory on the Court after the game.

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PE Requirement Extended to 4 years

Thegraduation requirement for Physical Education has been extended from two years to four after a vote conducted by the district. The San Mateo Union High School District Board (SMUHSD) shared the news last week and released some information regarding this decision. Board members have reportedly unanimously voted in favor of this rule change, claiming these extra two years of PE will greatly benefit students.

This change will go into effect immediately. Current Freshmen and Sophomores can expect to see PE on their course schedule for next year.

Current Juniors and Seniors will be expected to attend summer school PE classes in order to complete all the credits necessary to graduate.

This of course means that the 220 credits previously required to graduate have now become 240, and current seniors won’t be given their high school diploma until they complete the summer courses and meet the credit requirement.

Frustrated senior Joana Almohtaseb shared, “I just don’t understand how they could have made this decision so late into our high school years. It’s not fair of them to spring these required classes on us just a few months before we were set to graduate.”

The SMUHSD Board has released details on what these two years will entail. New units will be added including cricket and curling. Skateboarding, scootering, and rollerblading will also be added to the curriculum, putting the skate park to good use. Additionally, hula-hooping, jump-roping, and hopscotching units will be taught, promising to reconnect students with their child-

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hood hobbies. Lastly, this extension of classes will allow PE teachers to expand on prior units. The previous time slotted for swim unit only allowed students to learn the basics of swimming, now, students will also receive lifeguard training and swim lessons from Micheal Phelps himself. Similarly, previous first-aid lessons gave students the chance to be CPR certified, now teachers are planning to use these extra two years of classes to allow students to receive medical degrees.

Students don’t seem excited about these new units with the general agreement on campus being that they’re pointless and tedious. Sarah Lam (11) shared, “I’d been looking forward to taking artistic elective classes next year, but now I need to worry about meeting this new credit requirement instead. The PE courses don’t really include anything that interests me and I’m not looking forward to it at all.”

There has been a different response from school administrators. Since the news was released, many other schools in the country have

seen the wisdom in the decision of the SMUHSD Board and followed its lead. College Board itself has also adapted to this new, popular change and they’ve announced a new AP class, Advanced Placement Physical Education, or simply AP PE. Fourth-year PE students will be permitted to take this class and although all the details haven’t been sorted yet, College Board gave some insight on what taking this class will look like. They seem to believe that AP PE will take students from a school-sports-team level to an Olympic-level in 30 different sports. The AP exam will consist of a 50page written essay on pickleball and competitions for different athletic feats and sports. A full grade of 5 will only be granted to students who can run a mile in under 4.30 minutes It seems everyone is looking forward to these new PE classes except for the students required to take them. Unfortunately for them, the SMUHSD Board seems dead set on this decision and there’s no getting out of it. So Juniors and Seniors better dig out their old PE uniforms!* .

Mills Athletic Compound Closes Once Again

During the summer of 2021, construction began on new tennis courts and full turf practice fields. Construction was predicted to be finished by the start fall of 2022 so that the girls tennis team as well as the soccer teams and other field sport teams could use it for their seasons. Unfortunately, as a result of a series of delays due to weather, material delays, and forklifts malfunctions, the aptly titled Mills Athletic Compound (MAC) was not finished in time for the start of even the spring sport season. However, on March 16, 2023, nearly two years after construction began, the ribbon was cut, officially opening the Mills Athletic Compound. Having said that, the MAC has once again been shut down as a result of the recent weather once again citing that the artificial turf is waterlogged and needs to be replaced. This project will extend the project’s completion date another year until the spring of 2024.

The lack of access to adequate practice fields due to the construction process taking such a long

time angered many students on their respective teams. All League First Team Varsity Boys Soccer athlete, Kazuki Hensley (11), gave his thoughts on the delayed construction. With tears welling in his eyes Kazuki stated, “Jeez I just wish the practice fields would be finished already. I don’t know how many more days I can go sharing one soccer field with our JV team. I mean if I have to watch those JV guys practice for much longer I might lose my ability to kick a soccer ball.” Mean-

“I hate having to share such a small field with many other players at once, but watching the varsity team is truly inspiring to me. I hope that someday if I work hard, I can be as good at soccer as my hero Kazuki Hensley.”

Also a boys tennis athlete, Lucas Zaninovich shared his thoughts on not having any home games and driving to rival school Capuchino High School for practices. He men-

tioned that he was very disappointed that he couldn’t play on the big stage at Mills High School home tennis matches. He exclaimed, “Playing for the Mills High School Boys Tennis team has been a dream of mine since I first picked up a racket about a year and a half ago. Playing in front of the roaring Mills tennis crowd was everything I could dream of. I am crushed that I won’t get that opportunity until this season.”

Hopefully the fields can open for next season!*

Sports Editor hAnson hAn ‘23

Entertainment Editor phoebe pIserChIo ‘25

Max Zaninovich NEwS Editor

noor AbDullAh / mIlls thunDeDolt PE: Mills Students Play Basketball during PE class.`

noor AbDullAh / m lls thunDerDolt PE: Mills PE students warmup in the East Gym.

Online Learning Returns for 2024 School Year

Samuel Lam Staff writEr

The year 2019 was an auspicious year. It was one that brought about many events. Not only did it bring us the wonders of COVID-19, but also brought us an arguably vital tool to our education system. Throughout late 2019 and 2020, in order to properly follow quarantine procedures, most schools, if not all, switched to Zoom. Zoom is an online tool/platform that allows for a virtual meeting to be held in which a teacher or even students can collaborate and talk together as if they were in person. This tool is what carried current students throughout quarantine and allowed them to learn to the same extent if not better than they would have in person. Considering this, various world-renowned researchers coming from Sitford, UC New York & UC Cows have come together to do a study. It was found that students actually do better quarantined in their room, isolated from all civilization and staring at a screen for hours on end trying to absorb information. For this very reason, we are happy to announce that after two years of in-person learning, Mills is planning to bring back Zoom and online learning as a mandatory addition to our school’s curriculum.

Among the topics of research was the comparison of grades between the COVID year and now. According to this recent study, brain scans were taken through

the projector lenses in each classroom throughout this school year. Comparing these to the brain scans stored on everyone’s Zoom clients, it was found that students over Zoom were able to focus to a greater degree than they were able to in classrooms. This correlates with the differences in grades between these two years. In the junior class alone, average class scores were about 13% higher, or about 1 to 2 letter grades during the COVID-19 pandemic. However, there are some doubts caused by many claims that there were intricate cheating networks created by students to bypass

the school’s integrity. This, however, was further investigated, and through footage and data also stored in the Zoom client, it shows that no other applications besides Zoom and Google apps were ever open during classes. This completely debunks this baseless speculation of cheating and proves that students were indeed focusing leagues better on Zoom than in person.

Another topic that was researched was the student’s sleep patterns. Through various surveys conducted by Sitford and their colleagues, people were actually able to sleep a lot better and more soundly.

sAmuel lAm / the thunDerDolt

Stress levels were greatly reduced as less time was spent panicking about tests and assignments and spent focusing. Surveys also showed that on average, students actually got an astounding average of 3- 4 hours of sleep per night and only seven out of four students slept through their first period of the day. This is greatly attributed to students spending more time playing games such as Valorant, Minecraft, Fall Guys, and League of Legends. Upon interviewing parents of several alumni and current SMUHSD students, it was discovered that our student population actually spent a lot of time playing

video games until the wee hours of dawn. This greatly improved their sleep schedules and kept their circadian rhythm consistent, promoting greater moods and focus in zoom school. However, when compared to the sleep many students are currently experiencing, it has been found that they’re actually getting about 7- 9 hours of sleep on average. This is greatly detrimental to the growing mind and body of an everyday high schooler.

Not only was Zoom and online school found to be beneficial to students, but to teachers as well. Upon interviewing various middle and high school teachers, UC Cows has gathered enough data to say that teachers actually don’t like the school environment. They say that it is a toxic and harmful environment for their mental health and that interacting with students face-to-face is not the way to go. Instead, they greatly enjoyed having to sit for hours in front of their screen during their designated office hours talking to no one. “It was very peaceful and enjoyable actually”, one teacher said. “Instead of doing the various tasks around my house that needed attention, I was able to help a total of zero students that came into my office hours”.

Taking all of the data from this groundbreaking study and after no debate at all, Mills alongside other SMUHSD schools has decided that they will be moving back to Zoom for the following academic year and for the foreseeable future.*

Yondr Pouches Coming to Mills High School

Amelia Naughten Staff writEr

There is an epidemic spreading at Mills– and no, it isn’t COVID-19 this time. Everywhere one looks in Mills, students are consumed by it. This is occurring inside and outside of classrooms, and is infamous for spreading within large groups of students sitting together, displaying the same disquieting behavior. This is not new to the Mills community, and the culprit is never farther than an arm’s reach away. To no surprise, the villain here is unfortunately our beloved smartphones.

For several years at Mills, students’ obsession with their phones has been progressively worsening as technology advances. To combat this, many teachers have transformed calculator holders into phone holders which students store their phones when in class. However, this solution has been far from perfect as it fails to resolve the problem of excessive phone use outside of the classroom that prevents students from socializing and taking advantage of the “high school experience”. In a recent SMUHSD board meeting, the administration has decided that in the best interest of students and their academic pursuits, the optimal solution to this problem is instating in infamous Yondr phone pouches.

The pouches work by sealing your phone in a magnetically locked fabric bag that you carry with you throughout the day, but that can only be opened once in contact with the magnetic key. In the school district, these magnetic keys will be handled by trusted teachers and staff members who will unlock student phones at the end of the last class of each day.

Students and staff have been divided over this decision. Opposing the new policy, Elaine Chan (10)

exclaimed, “The day this school installs Yondr phone pouches is the day I drop out!”

On the other hand, some staff eagerly await the approach of this fateful day. Mr. Lira, who leads three classes in the social science department, has always been an avid supporter of phone restrictions. His radical phone pocket system where students have to put their phones in wall pouches in order to ensure attendance has only been a placeholder in the greater scheme of Yondr phone pouches: “Phone pouches work the best because without them, students might record some of my bad jokes or when I get moody and post it on social media…and I’ll get canceled!”

On top of this, the administration’s plan for Yondr phone pouches touches on other significant issues pertaining to phone usage, one of the most notable issues being student health and wellness. For several months ongoing, wellness counselors at Mills have been complaining of new influxes of students describing finger pains and eye strains from using phones for extended periods of time.

Moreover, a popular rumor that phones have radioactive qualities that may increase cancer risk, although unproven, has raised concerns in the health of Mills students and staff. Not only that, but some staff (who wish to remain anonymous) go as far as to claim that

sourced data set presented in the district documents, students charging their personal devices at school accounts for almost 10% of all energy consumed. By preventing students from charging their phones during the day, the district forecasts that energy conservation efforts will be dramatically furthered. Administrators also predict that the school wifi will run 50% faster after the mass of devices have been disabled, a detail that appeared to garner the support of staff and students alike.

As a last addition, administrators also hope that the Yondr pouches will promote a sense of community among Mills students. The documents cite how many students nowadays lack communication skills

attending students and teachers had the chance to share their thoughts and questions for the implementation of Yondr pouches.

Julia Xia (10) asked, “What if there’s an emergency I need to attend to?” An administrator was prompt to respond to this concern, explaining that all students had to do to regain access to their phone for emergencies was to “walk to the office where you can request to fill out an emergency form in which you enter your email, password, student ID, and explain your intentions in a brief paragraph, to which will be promptly reviewed and granted access.”

At the same time, he still questioned the effectiveness of the pouches based on his expertise in phone restrictions. “This still doesn’t stop students from exchanging their real phone for a fake,” Mr. Lira brought up in a meeting. Administrators simply shrugged.

Another teacher, Mr. DeBois, although always maintaining a neutral stance on restricting phones in the classroom, expressed, “I don’t really mind, but I’m a little disappointed that I won’t be able to make snarky comments at students who use their phone in my class anymore.”

they have a hunch that the “energy vibes in the classroom are affected by radio waves emitted from student phones in use”, a phenomenon which has only been amplified as more students begin to own personal devices. Teachers also feel that removing the blaring red “This is a cell phone-free space” sign from their walls will relieve their “stress about the aesthetic appearance of the classroom.”

Another major focus at Mills is energy conservation, and administrators believe that Yondr pouches will help them attain their goal. According to another anonymously

and the ability to emotionally connect with others without emojis or the filter of texting. They hope that by removing the most popular form of communication from students, that they will be able to generate a greater sense of connectivity at Mills. Administrators even forecast a future for the integration of Yondr pouches at Mills, in which the Yondr pouch will become accepted as a uniting fashion statement among Mills students.

While these factors may seem idealistic, Mills students wary of this new policy raise valid concerns. In a SMUHSD open zoom meeting,

This question being thoroughly responded to, Noor Abdullah (11) jumped into the conversation, inquiring, “What if I need to use phone apps or tools for class?” This time, a new administrator stepped up to the microphone to address the audience. She opened by saying, “Nowadays we rely too much on our apps and phones,” earning some unsettled shifting in seats and diverted glances from parents and staff, no doubt feeling personally attacked. However she quickly redeemed this statement by clarifying, “As young people, it’s important that Mills students learn how to use manual equipment. As we transition to Yondr pouches, Mills will be providing dictionaries and planners to every student as well as adding a new realism unit in art to replace the use of cameras.” Parents and staff were impressed with the administration’s insightful responses to the questions.

Soon to come later in the Spring Semester, Mills students can be expecting the incorporation of Yondr pouches into the Mills community, working to benefit the students in more ways than we can count. Staff look forward to seeing their students’ faces light up inside and outside of class– and this time not just because of the light emitted from their phones.

ZOOM: Students were forced to do school over Zoom.

YONDR POUCHES: Instruction on how Yondr Pouches will function.

Mr. Lira Meets Famous Composer, John Williams

Elaine Chan staFF Writer

Afterlifelong dedication to famous composer, John Williams, our very own Mr. Lira has finally met his idol. On February 8th, 2023 at his most recent concert, Modern World History/Ethnic Studies teacher, Mr. Lira tells the story of his long awaited meet and greet with John Williams. With a VIP ticket snagged at meetandgreetticket.com/John-Williams-Composer to the Williams Experience, Lira states that the line to get in was the longest and most exciting 45 minutes of his life. Proving to be the most successful and clever fan out there, Lira disclosed that he enrolled with 7 different accounts on 7 different devices, Apple products of course, to score his unbeatable tickets from Ticketmaster™. Explaining the tedious process of the tickets, Ticketmaster™ genius Mr. Lira, states that the VIP meet and greet tickets were purchased separately from his general admission. [insert quote about how he felt]

After asking some of his students about his passion for Williams’s arrangements, it is obvious that his brilliance does not go unnoticed in the Mills community. “I know a lot about him now too. Our extra credit questions and slideshows have John Williams weaved into them,” states Phoebe Piserchio (10), a student in his Modern World History course. When asking Mr. Lira himself, it is revealed that it all

began in the year of 1981, when his older brother introduced him to his first track, “My brother who bought me the Superman II record after seeing the movie,” Lira states. His devotion to Williams goes unmatched as he tells that, “His music works outside of the film. He writes stellar music that stands the test of time.”

After that, his eyes were opened to the world of Williams and thus began the immersion in his daily life.

From Spotify playlists and movie posters to Academy Award Nominations, John Williams and Mr. Lira had formed a lasting bond for years to come. When asked about another esteemed film composer, Hans Zimmer, Mr. Lira expresses his distaste for Zimmer’s pieces. “His style ruined film music. Zimmer writes music by playing the keyboard as he watches the film.” Comparing his methods with Williams’s, Lira prais-

es his ability to write most of his music, “..sitting down and on music notation paper; it’s all in his head.”

Behind the curtain at the exclusive meet and greet, Lira was seen holding a wrapped gift box and a bag of Skinny Pop. When asked about this, he told the Thunderbolt, “I gifted him the brand new IPhone 14 Pro and Ipad Pro with palm rejection. Oh and the Skinny Pop was a snack for him on the road.” Upon being next in line, he was surprised to see him taking a selfie with a Samsung Galaxy in hand. Thankfully, he could be the one to switch him over to the Apple family. Taking not one but two photos together, Lira describes the experience as, “..surreal and unforgettable.” It being his 42nd year being a part of the John Williams fandom, one can only imagine his level of excitement.

To add on, the Thunderbolt has

just been let in on a juicy secret: John Williams is set to release his all-new documentary, John Williams at 91. Better yet, Mills High School’s very own Mr. Lira has been asked to feature as a fan and newfound friend of Williams. Receiving a grand total of 2 minutes and 8 seconds of screen time, he is ecstatic and cited that countless fans

present at the meet and greet left utterly envious of Lira. While the release date is still unknown, Mr. Lira may have scheduled absences from school to film alongside the Williams crew for the aforementioned documentary. Readers can count on the team of reporters at the Thunderbolt to follow up on the highly anticipated cameo of Mr. Alex Lira.*

Math Department: Making the Switch from Pencil to Pen

Julia Xia staFF Writer

Attention Mills students! When shopping for school supplies, you might want to consider stacking up on pens and white-out because starting next year, math teachers are enforcing a no pencil policy. The math teachers at Mills are tired: tired of straining their eyes trying to decipher their students’ work, tired of eraser shaving littering the desks and floors, and tired of the constant sound of a pencil sharpener going off mid-discussion.

In order to combat the irritation, math teachers have decided to switch gears and give pens a try, thinking that they won’t cause as much trouble in the classroom.

“If I see another kid brush eraser shavings off their desk, I’m bringing back pop quizzes,” Geometry teacher Ms. Do-Le exclaims. But where did the teachers get this idea?

During my interview with Ms. DoLe she explained that while talking about the pencil problem with other teachers, Mr Guzman (an English teacher) brought up that maybe pens were the solution to the problem. Having a history of making his students write their on-demand essays in only pen, he believes that pens are the backbone of the academic community and students should learn to use them. The math teachers – not realizing it was a joke – took his suggestion to heart and began to consider his idea; thank you Mr. Guzman!

So why would a pen only policy entice teachers? Well, one thing about pens is that they are easy to see; unlike pencils, most pens are either a dark shade of blue, or just plain black, making it much easier to read a student’s writing. “When I check the homework there is always this one kid who writes way too light making it almost impossible to see their work; maybe if they wrote it in pen I could finally know what

Julia Xia: Thunderbolt

PETITION: Student Petition against Mills Math Department’s policy

There is still some debate whether or not the pen policy should be enforced next year; if there are enough students speaking out about it then maybe the teachers would think otherwise. Some students have even created a petition trying to prevent the policy from coming to fruition. If you want to support them, scan the QR code above.*

J X : Thunderbolt

GOODBYE PENCILS: Mills student makes the swtich during math class fromusing pencil to using pen write with their favorite colors, and more. “When I write in pen it makes my work look more fancy,” pen lover Clare Montserrat (10) says.

I’m grading,” Ms. Do-Le explains. Another reason why pens have become more appealing to teachers is their lack of mess. As mentioned before, with pencils come eraser shavings, and small broken bits of lead, all of which dirty up the desks and floors and get everywhere, whereas pens are mess-free.

Not to mention the fact that if students were to begin using pens on a daily basis, including during tests, it could potentially improve their handwriting and overall answers. The stress of not being able to erase could motivate students to try harder to make their handwriting more legible and understandable. Students could also use the different types of pens to spice up their work. “There are many different types of pens: there are gel pens, sparkly pens, fountain pens, ballpoint pens, rollerball pens, click pens, erasable pens, feather pens and so much more!” pen enthusiast Ms. Do-Le adds.

With all these varieties of pen students could color-code their work,

But pens aren’t all great, with pencil, it’s so easy to just erase whatever you might have done incorrectly and not be bothered by it; but with pens, you’re left with a scribbled out section of your paper or a whiteout mark. “When I make a mistake in pen, I have to cross it out or use white-out. You can always see the area where you make the mistake and I don’t like how it looks. It makes my work look messy,” an anonymous sophomore at Mills explained. While not all students struggle with writing the wrong thing, it’s still a serious concern that could impact students’ well-being.

It could also be extremely stressful for students to do their tests in pen, not many students are used to writing in pen and the number of mistakes that could arise are great. Since most pens can’t erase and not everyone has white-out, most of the

space on the test would be full of scribbled out work. In classes such as Geometry, many of the tests involve graphing points and if someone were to make a mistake, it could ruin their whole test. One white-out waster pointed out, “If I had to do a test in pen I would end up using an unreal amount of white-out and it would end up taking so much time off the test trying to fix my mistakes.”

elaine Chan: Thunderbolt

IDOL: Mr. Lira (Mills History teacher) pictured with famous composer, John Williams

soundtraCk Fest

JOHN WILLIAMS: Concert advertisement of San Francisco 2023 performance

Some students have even created a petition trying to prevent the policy from coming to fruition.

Math Teacher Mr. Yan’s New Nike Brand Deal

Phoebe Piserchio entertainment editor

This past week, esteemed math teacher, Steven Yan, confirmed rumors that he has been in preliminary talks with Nike over a potential three-year contract to start his own math-inspired basketball shoe line.

Rumors have been floating around school since early March, when a student stumbled upon an email thread from Nike on Yan’s computer during flex. The student admits to originally looking for test answers, and therefore wishes to remain anonymous. They recalled, “I kind of did a double-take when I saw these mockups of Nike shoes with math symbols on it, then when I looked closer, I saw they were part of an email to Mr. Yan from the Chief Design Officer at Nike, Inc. I told my friends about it and, well, word got around quick.”

In an exclusive interview with the Thunderbolt, Yan expressed little to no disappointment towards his secret being exposed. “I mean, it was bound to get out sooner or later… I’m very disappointed in the student who tried cheating, though.”

Yan went on to explain that he start-

ed getting into his shoe-design hobby to occupy the extra time he had during quarantine. “Naturally, I was working on some proofs and writing math problems when I realized what cool designs I could make with math. I created a number of designs that incorporated familiar math concepts, from the Fibonacci Sequence to geometric vector shapes,” he said.

Yan’s personal favorite is a pair of shoes with hidden pockets for students to keep their notes safe; other pairs have equations and formulas for students to use on assignments.

“I originally printed my designs on t-shirts and hoodies, but then I thought maybe shoes would be more challenging and fun to design.” When asked where he learned

Mills Student Breaks Stanford Curse

Bruce Nie staFF Writer

WithMarch nearing its end, the senior class of 2023 faces their final stretch before officially finishing their high school career. A mere two months before the end of the school year, it would seem like this time would be one of joy and relaxation. However, a quick look at the majority of seniors would reveal faces drawn with stress and nervousness. This is, of course, a result of the nerve-wracking college decision process where all of a student’s efforts in and outside of class for the past 4 years of highschool is summarized into one short essay and a list of activities—with most college decisions being sent back to students mid-March. However, during this time of uncertainty, there is also a beacon of hope for not only the graduating class, but for all future classes—the Stanford Curse is officially broken!

The infamous Stanford Curse refers to the unusual lack of students admitted into Stanford University from Mills despite many students being admitted into universities of similar caliber. In fact, no student from Mills has been admitted to Stanford since 1958! On another note, that student’s father was also the president of Stanford’s Board of Education and donated 5 libraries throughout his life. Many have speculated that Stanford is holding a grudge towards Mills or simply they don’t like Vikings, but whatever the case, the Stanford drought is broken. Receiving his acceptance letter even a week before the reg-

ular release date, Nathan Agustin (12) becomes the first Mills student in 65 years to receive admission into Stanford University. To any of his classmates and friends, this is a complete surprise, as while Nathan is a bright student, he doesn’t seem like the complete and academically sound student a prestigious college like Stanford is looking for. To gain further insight and advice for future seniors, the Thunderbolt set up an interview with Nathan. “Yeah, to be honest, I don’t even really know how I got in,” Nathan says with a sheepish smile on his face. “My mom just told me to apply the day before it was due and I wrote an essay about how Dahyun is the best member in Twice and she should be everyone’s bias.” That definitely rules out a genius, profound essay being the main factor in his admission. Maybe his rigorous coursework in school is the reason? When we asked him about how many APs he took in high school, “Oh yeah, I only took like two APs—AP Environmental

Science and AP Human Geography. I did really good in those classes though…I got like a B minus and a C plus I think. I even got a 3.0 that year!” Ok, maybe not… Scratching my head, I continued on, asking was it because of spectacular extracurriculars? “Uhm I don’t know, I like relaxing and really having some ME time outside of class so I didn’t do much. Oh right! I did JV volleyball last year and I think I was in uhmmm…a club.” Nathan looked so smug I almost regurgitated in my mouth. However, I instinctively used all the years of mindfulness training from P.E. yoga classes and a certain Biology class I had freshman year to recollect myself With the interview coming to an end, I was left with more questions than before. How and why did Stanford let Nathan Agustin into its prestigious halls? I certainly don’t have the answer, but my prayers are with the Stanford administration as they deal with Nathan Agustin for the next 4 years.

how to make designs in the first place, Yan’s answer was unexpected: “This might come as a shock to you all, but I actually have a background in fashion design.” Before deciding to go into math education, he spent a couple of years at the Fashion Institute of Design and Manufacturing (FIDM). Though he enjoyed the creative process, he realized the fashion world was not for him, and decided to transfer to San Francisco State University and become a math major.

Having reconnected with his first talent, Yan kept up his shoe designing as a hobby into the 2021-2022 school year. “When we had to go back in person, I started working on my designs just on the weekends. But, sometimes, I’d secretly work on them during class while students were taking their tests,” Yan revealed with a chuckle.

However, it wasn’t until Mills’ annual March Madness basketball games that he came to the realization that shoe design was something he could actually pursue. “It was the semi-finals and my old basketball shoes were completely torn and it totally messed up my game. Mr. Hakim had to carry the team and I was so mad at myself. Later that night, I did some research and to my luck, Nike was having a competition where

you could send in shoe designs and they’d pick a winner. I immediately got to work and sent in my designs.”

That was in March 2022. Months went by until Yan heard back from Nike, but the long wait was worth it.

“They absolutely loved my designs-especially the Fibonacci sequence shoe! I was flattered and shocked. Honestly, I wasn’t expecting to hear anything back at all,” he expressed with a proud look on his face. After a year of Zoom meetings with different Nike executives, Yan’s shoe line is officially in production. “We’re calling it Yan Factorials™,” said Nike’s Chief Design Officer John Hoke. ”Steven’s designs are incredibly inspiring and innovative, bringing something to the table that we haven’t had here at Nike in a long time. Yan Factorials are the next big thing.” Yan is currently in negotiations to finalize the terms of the contract, which would allow Nike to use his designs for at least three to five years.

“It’s super exciting, and I hope this is just the beginning,” exclaimed Yan. But don’t worry, Mr. Yan confirmed he has no plans to leave his day job. “It’s Mills students who inspire me every day, and I’m so grateful I can do something that combines my love of math with my artistic side.” *

Mr. Matt: Superstar

Erika Kita staFF Writer

Everyyear new teachers are hired to teach at mills high school, but unknown to many of the students, one of our new teachers was actually a famous rockstar. New art teacher Matt Christenson has recently revealed his previous job as an honorary band member in the rock band Phish.

Mr.Matt became famous in the band for doing goofy dances for this jam band. A jam band is essentially a musical group whose concerts (and live albums) are characterized by lengthy improvisational “jams. He would be the member keeping the rhythm by playing multiple auxiliary percussion instruments. Including the cowbell, tambourine, and even the triangle. The band Phish includes members Trey Anastasio on Guitar, Mike Gordon on Bass guitar, Jon Fishman on Drum Kit, and Page McConnell on Keyboard. Mr.Matt joined their band during their tour to Oregon. Matt was on a road trip with his wife during their tour and went to the concert. He became famous for doing his goofy moves and was even on the news for his dances. From the result of his popularity of being the “goofy dances guy” he was able to join them on tour to play percussion instruments while dancing around. He would tour around the nation with Phish and became known for his funky moves and continued the tour together.

Mr. Matt describes that “the best memory of being in the band was crowd surfing to the end of the audience and making it to the exit where we were able to end early.”

The other members of Phish found out that Matt had an artistic talent as well and asked him to do live paintings on stage while the band played along. Matt was ecstatic to paint on stage where he realized his passion for making art and expressing himself. Matt explains his worst memories of the tour by saying “one time in Minnesota I was crowd surfing and the mosh pit erupted on top of me”. This all dream-like experience ultimately came to an end when Mr.Matt came into a fight during the second last performance of the tour.

Mr.Matt was all over the news about

his altercation with a belligerent fan and how he got kicked out of the band. In that moment when he was getting kicked out he realized how teaching was going to be his passion. He proceeds to explain how “people needed some serious education in their life so I became a teacher”. Overall his experiences of being in the band has made him appreciate his new job of being a teacher. He loves teaching art and his new job way better because there are a lot less screaming adults and he is surrounded by teenagers instead. Mr.Matt says “I am surrounded by better music by working at this school and I am grateful to have this opportunity.” *

Phoebe PiserChio Thunderbolt

NIKE BRAND DEAL: Mr. Yan poses with prototype of new shoe design

bruCe nie: Thunderbolt

NATHAN AGUSTIN: Mills’ Newest Stanford Admit poses with a smile

MR.MATT: Mr.Matt shows off

Dear Editor . . .

Are you having a problem with your relationship?

Do you need an extra perspective on a school issue? The Mills Thunderbolt’s got your back!

I’ve had a crush on this person in my English class for most of the school year. They’re really funny, hardworking, pretty, and I always feel like we connect a lot when we do talk. We don’t talk that much outside of school other than to ask about homework or things like that, but I really like them. I want to tell them how I feel, but how should do it? - Nervous Classmate

Hi Nervous Classmate,

In my opinion, feelings are only complicated when you make them that way. There is a pretty straightforward solution, which is to tell them directly. Since you don’t talk that much outside of school, try seeking them out to change that and make them more receptive to your confession. A quick Google search can bring you to many websites that find the address of a person. Once you’ve located that, prepare a cute bouquet of flowers and show up at a time you know they’ll be home at. If they don’t respond to a knock or ring of the bell, try using a lockpick or pretending you’re the police. You’ll for sure get an answer! Take a deep breath. You got this!

I’ve been going out with my current boyfriend for two years. We’ve been on and off, but I really love him. We’ve gone through so much together and he’s like a best friend to me. But I feel like we should break up for good. I feel like the spark has died, but I can’t bring myself to end things. I’d not only be losing someone who means so much to me, but a really good friend. We’ve also been arguing a lot more and it’s only a few months before we go to college and put more stress on our already stressed-out relationship. I just can’t bring myself to do it, but I know I have to. How should I break up with him? - Heartbroken Senior

Dear Heartbroken Senior,

I suggest you don’t break up with him at all and let it just naturally die. Use the remaining time left to seek out other potential suitors. I assume you’re old enough to go on dating apps, so don’t be shy and download a few! It’s always good to plan ahead, and since this won’t work out anyway (I mean, let’s be real here – on and off for two years?!), you might as well have some fun. Encourage him to also have some fun as well. The spark might even be rekindled if you two try something new! Hope this helps.

Dear Editor,

I’ve never been good at studying. Throughout most of high school, I’ve gotten away with just winging my exams and getting pretty solid scores every time. But this year, AP Chemistry has been kicking my butt! I think I get the concepts, but when I get my scores, they’re always in the C to D range. Now I have another test today, but I completely blanked and have to cram during my lunch period. What should I do? - Struggling Student

Struggling Student,

Wow, I feel you there for sure! I suggest taking your mind off of things and not studying at all. You wouldn’t want to go into your test all nervous as that would only jeopardize your chances of getting a good score. Rather than focusing your attention on study ing for a test you’re sure to fail, instead find a way to avoid taking it. Faking getting ill, having an appointment with your wellness counselor, or simply not showing up is a sure way to ensure you get more time to study. Don’t procrastinate this time!

by Chloe Ho and Nicole Lee

Dear Editor,

As a junior at Mills I am thinking a lot about college applications. In order to apply to Harvard, my dream school, I am in need of two teacher recommendations. However, currently none of my teachers like me. I talk a lot in class, tend to fall dead asleep during lectures, and I never know what’s going on. Starting now. I need to get all my teachers to love and adore me. How should I go about this? - Curious Junior

Hey there, Curious Junior,

I had this same problem as a junior, so I’ll let you in on my three step method that got me two incredible recommendation letters. First, you need to figure out what teacher you’d think would write the best (English teachers would be best). Second, get to know them and learn what they like. If you like what they like they’re guaranteed to like you. The best way to delve deeper into their personal life is by stalking them. Follow them around, eavesdrop on their conversations, break into their house and look through their belongings, whatever you feel is best. Finally, now that you know what they like, bribe them into writing you an impeccable letter.

Dear Editor,

My friend and I are very close. When we hang out, we often do karaoke together, and he always brags about how good his singing skills are. Truth be told, he’s pretty tone-deaf. I’ve told him before in a joking tone, but now he wants to enter the talent show and do a cover of “All of Me”. I tried to gently discourage him, but he’s been practicing for a week now and I think he’s really into the idea. He really is a bad singer, but I don’t want to hurt his feelings. How should I tell him? - Conflicted Comrade

Hi Conflicted Comrade,

If your friend is so confident about his singing skills, he ought to show it to the world. Record your next karaoke session and upload it to YouTube, Twitter, Instagram, and wherever else you can. Be sure to promote it at school– I suggest posters with a QR code to the video, or by word of mouth– and watch the comments roll in. Be sure that everyone knows it’s him. The people of the internet will do your job for you, and even more convincingly. Hopefully this happens before the talent show happens so he drops out.

Dear Editor,

I am stuck in a tough situation. I have been crushing on these two girls for almost a year now and I have finally decided to mus ter up all my courage and ask one of them out on a date. Both the girls are incredible but I don’t know which one is right for me. I can’t tell who I could see a future withstand I’m losing my confidence. Quick! Who should I choose? - Lovestruck Student

Lovestruck Student,

You sure are in a sticky situation! One of my favorite and most trusted methods at making any sort of big decision is to flip a coin. Something about leaving fate up to my decisions is so exciting. Simply decide which is heads and which is tails and then ask the coin, “Which girl is right for me?” The coin will have your best interest and will give you the answer you have been looking for. Even better if the first person doesn’t work out you can ask the other one out as well. It’s really a win-win scenario. All the best!

Dear Editor,

Senioritis has been affecting me greatly. After school I go straight to my bed and never do any of my homework. This week I had a super important test in my Pre-Calculus class and I completely bombed it. I got a 3/100 and my grade currently stands at an F. My teacher, Mrs. Kovacs, pulled me aside and told me I would potentially be unable to graduate since Pre-Calculus accounts for my third year of math. I don’t know how I am supposed to break the news to my parents. What should I do?Stressed Senior

Dear Stressed Senior,

First of all, don’t panic! Panicking does nothing but create more worry, which is the last thing you need as a senior. This is your last year of school before you graduate and become an adult, so why should you spend it studying? Avoiding your problems allows your to return to them (if you do) with a clearer mindset. I would suggest talking to your teacher about potentially using some of that sweet, sweet money lining your pockets to bump that grade. Best of luck to you!

Daniel Gao Staff Writer

Haveyou noticed that the school cafeteria food has been constantly getting better with the occasional fried chicken? The Mills PTO has agreed to allocate more funding for the school cafeteria and chefs from all around the world are hearing.

Over the past few months, the school administration has hired acclaimed chefs who previously worked in the restaurant business. From a Wingstop employee making the fried chicken in the kitchen, to a cook from Gino e Toto Sorbillo, the famous pizzeria in Naples, Italy.

As a result, the Mills cafeteria food has been climbing to the top and ranking as one of the best school lunches in the California public school system. Every year, the California public high school food critic comes during January to inspect the quality of the cafeteria food. Coincidentally, our recent cafeteria food improvements had landed our school cafeteria into the top 10 of California public school cafeteria rankings.

So how did we even manage to land our school cafeteria into the top 10? Over several weeks of summer and winter break in 2022, the Mills cafeteria staff acquired the funding to hire and attend an in-person Masterclass course with Gordon Ramsey, the world’s renowned chef. After a week of learning with Gordon Ramsey, the Mills cafeteria team

brought back new recipes that were suitable for SMUHSD food allergy guidelines. Recently the school cafeteria has been cooking up pasta every Wednesday and the occasional deep fried chicken created by our own student cafeteria chef Phoebe Zhang (12). Phoebe, who also works at Wingstop brought her chicken frying knowledge to the Mills cafeteria.

Another student cafeteria worker Natalie Yeung (12), is an award winning Tpumps barista nominated by the Tpumps employee of the year. During brunch she occasionally makes strawberry banana smoothies for the first few people in line. With the knowledge of making boba tea drinks, the school cafeteria is considering making boba for their students every Friday during brunch. Now students have the option to either choose between blueberry yogurt parfaits or mango peach passion boba tea as their choice.

Even more, the Burlingame Tpumps manager recently created a Tpumps catering contract with Mills high school valued over $850,000 for the duration of this and next school year. This meant that the Mills Tpumps catering team lead by Natalie Yeung will be serving students in the cafeteria on starting April 1st. With the new funding, the cafeteria also wants to open a “create your own burger bar”. Students can pick toppings for their burgers at a “subway” style bar where the cafeteria “sandwich artists’’ create their own burger for you. With the new burger bar, the cafeteria wants students to get a healthier option with their lunch by providing hand leafed lettuce, pickled jalapenos, onions, sliced truffles, and beluga caviar imported from the Caspian Sea. The new burger bar is designed to cater to students with different tastes and dietary

preferences. It will offer a variety of options for vegetarians, vegans, and meat-eaters alike, with choices like portobello mushrooms, vegan cheese, and beyond meat patties. With the new funding for school food approved by the school board, the Mills cafeteria has become one of the best in the California public school system. The Mills PTO are thankful for a world class talented cafeteria team taught by Gordon Ramsey and acquiring a Michelin star has been in review*.

Student Opinion: Students Should Be at School Longer

Kyle Chan Staff Writer

Afterseeing and hearing many complaints about the lack of focus and the tendency for students to go on their phone, I believe that Mills should increase the duration of hours of school. This means that school has to start and end later during the day.

The reason why school should start much earlier than 8:30 in the morning is because waking up early enables the brain to function at its full power. There are countless studies that show how waking up early reveals better signs of mental health organization, and productivity. According to Pew Research Center, waking up early increases critical-thinking and problem-solving skills. That saying, students will be more ready and willing to learn each day as the school year goes on.

Since there are many students who sometimes get classes they don’t like or they get their alternative choice of a class, extending the school day is the perfect solution

to this circumstance. By extending the end of school, this allows extra periods where students can choose their favorite classes. It widens one’s knowledge, enabling them to have lots of opportunities. It also prepares students for future jobs, as many would have broadened their skill sets.

A schedule that consists of half of the day can fix bad sleeping schedules. By eliminating the “after school” naps and any other unsound sleeping habits, students can develop and attain a strict and healthy sleeping schedule. After the school day, students are less likely to pick up any distractions due to their tiredness, leading them to sleep earlier. This cycle then creates their circadian rhythm.

Having a circadian rhythm is beneficial as it prepares students with

the healthiest bodies and mindsets.

With the enclosed campus during schooltime, students will be less distracted from outside activities away from school. Studies show that students are prone to learn more in school because there are fewer distractions.The new schedule, 7:30-5:30 forces students to finish all their classwork and homework before getting home in order to maintain enough sleep throughout the week. This process eliminates any aspects of procrastination and second thoughts when working on an assignment, especially with school-athletes. Through the use of discipline and regulation, students will begin to thrive, like how diamonds are made under pressure.

There have been many reviews on Yelp about Mills that criticize the

school system and how it has been neglecting the growth of students. These comments consist of parents from Mills complaining that their child is not very productive after school and how the school system fails their child. One example that stands out is the parent of Ito Lazee, who is currently a freshman, states that, “Ito promptly hops onto the video game without finishing his homework. He is currently flunking most of his classes, and is on the road to repeating a grade. Another example from the parent of Ava Ohworc (11) shares, “I know the school is still transitioning from Covid-19, but my daughter has developed really bad habits regarding the time spent on social media, rather than school work. I hope the school system can push her to become the

best”. Having a fairly easy school schedule tempts students to become lazy. This is important especially when colleges look at grades in your sophomore and junior years. These are ones of the many of the abhorrent circumstances that reside within the parents of Mills High School. One might say, how will this benefit teachers, as longer days mean more teaching? With longer school days, teachers can worry less about “distracting” students. For example, teachers can avoid threatening to enforce the use of “phone pockets”. One main reason why students go on their phones during school hours is because they lack communication with their friends, often tempting them to engage in small talk on their phones. By enlarging the amount of hours during school, students can easily engage with each other without the use of phones. Another possibility is that students have to involuntarily listen in order to obtain the necessary information to complete their learning. Instead of fooling around, they are obligated to give their full attention to stay on top of their classes.

With all these facts laid out, Mills must make changes quickly in order to ensure an efficient structure where students can be pushed beyond their limits. With a longer school day, students will have an increased period of time to learn and develop their skills. The Mills administration should pursue implementing longer school schedules for all grades. That being said, we can only hope that the administration team can acknowledge this situation and to make adjustments.

Kyle Chan Staff Writer

NEW CHANGES: Recent Mills administration-approved schedule leaked, includes an additional eight and ninth period with school ending at five or six.

Daniel Gao Staff Writer

FUTURE LUNCHES: Mills Nutrition plan burgers and fried chick-

Rachel Cheng Staff Writer

AWARDS: Mills Nutrtion Committee has been awarded the Best Public School Food Quality in CA.

Daniel Gao Staff Writer DRINK MENU: Future Tpumps and Mills collab.

Why Mills Should have a School Anthem

Michael Lin Staff Writer

Identity is a significant and challenging component of human culture. As a teenager, it signals the challenge to identify the self and the challenge to discover a group to belong to. It is natural for people to congregate and form a sense of security as well as relatability, and what better way to share said relatability than a single song sung by collective voices? Anthems are representation of common ideals; they are sung to honor dreams, sacrifices, foundations, and individuality. However, some do not share the same dream, does this warrant a need for anthems to be sung by Mills?

Generally speaking, most schools in the US sing the national anthem in respect to our country and those who have fought and continue to fight for it. A few colleges such as USC play anthems in sports events to reach an audience. In 2019, before the COVID-19 pandemic, Mills developed a clap for sports events, but this tradition would soon come to an abrupt halt. According to Leadership and History teacher Ms. Dove, it seems unlikely that the clap will resurface to the light of day hereafter. “The pandemic played some part in it. That was something we have created years prior, and we don’t seem

to have enough students or people that have interests in it anymore.”

We suggest that a Mills anthem be chosen from popular songs on Spotify. However, in order to ignite creativity and fun, Mills should consider making parodies that can induce unity and spirit within the campus. Amongst, the spirit that it would induce, it would unite the community. “It should be like a lively song, and not a sad song,” says Daniel Gao (12) a senior from Mills, who suggests a more vivid tune to play each morning, instead of a gut-wrenching, tear-jerking, depression-inducing song to be played through the ever so crooked sound of the Mills speaker. “I think the anthem should be someone yawning since yawning is contagious, and everyone would have no choice but to join,” says another senior who chooses to remain anonymous. Indeed, the sounds of yawns would suffice in bringing together the hundreds of students who endure agonizing excursions with homeworks throughout the dead of the night. Alex Malagon expresses his view, suggesting that “We should have a school anthem because I feel a theme song would bring the community together. You know how “The Office” has a theme song? I’d like that too.” Mr. Hensley adds his opinion; “You know, most schools have a song. Like my old school, they have one. I feel like it would bring some tradition to the school, so yeah, I think there should be one.”

Perhaps what Mills High School can do is hold a vote on what song could become our theme song. Some suggestions could include “OMG” by NewJeans, “Never Gonna Give You Up” by Rick Astley, “Baby” by Justin Bieber, “Barbie Girl” by Aqua, and “All Stars” by Smash Mouth. All these iconic songs can be rewritten by students and incorporated during game time.

In my opinion, an anthem would greatly benefit Mills High School as it would do much good to bond all students together and create a nationalistic pride. As faithful members of the Mills community, I think it is our duty show how much we love Mills High School through music.*

Axe Body Spray and Business Ventures at Mills

Rachel Cheng Staff Writer

Among the halls of many high schools, there are often several kids who are notorious for their scents. As they walk past, you can smell the lingering musky scent of their Axe body spray. Recently, the brand Axe has been building up their brand and gaining popularity among teenage boys, specifically their body sprays and deodorant. Axe has recently introduced a new line of 16-in-1 body spray, which also functions as a shampoo, conditioner, laundry detergent, toothpaste, and more.

In lieu of this new trend of powerfully fragrant colognes and body sprays, companies such as Old Spice are also developing new scents for consumers. Some new ones include Durian, Campfire, and Fishing. Other companies are taking a new approach to the trend, taking scents from fictional characters such as Trubbish from Pokémon or Chewbacca from Star Wars.

A recent study about the cologne opinions of others was published by an anonymous research company at Mills High School . Senior student Zamie Zong was selected to sample a multitude of different scents. The colognes included brands ranging from Axe to Dior, with a wide variety in price and brand name. However, despite the

other more expensive scents, Zong decided that the Axe body spray was most distinguishable among the others. Zong was asked to blindly express her opinion on randomly selected scents, and displayed a strong distaste for classic YSL colognes. When asked about the reasoning behind her preference, Zong commented, “Wow it was stinky”. However, after sampling Axe’s 16-in-1, Zong claimed that this

scent was the best out of all others. Due to the exponential growth of Axe body spray’s popularity, Mills High School has made the executive decision to begin the promotion of the product on campus. The school will be selling the body spray every day during school hours to ensure that every student can follow the new trend. Administration announced that students who earn outstanding grades will win a sample of Axe’s new line

of 16-in-1. In addition, the teachers themselves will be promoting the product as well. Advertisements will be placed in each teacher’s classroom, along with photos of teachers posing with the famous spray.

Contrary to popular belief, many female-identifying students have different opinions on various male colognes. Mills High School student Zerika Zita (12) complains heavily, “I think it smells bad sometimes. I don’t like the options that they have. They’re supposed to be ‘manly’ but they smell like musk and wood.” Zita also elaborates that many male fragrances are labeled with very ridiculous names such as “Man Musk” and “Secret Weapon”, and that they only support traditional masculine values. Rather than creating scents that have “feminine” names, Zita acknowledges that many male cologne companies name their fragrances after masculine things. She suggests that, instead, men begin wearing feminine scents to break down these traditional values of having to always wear “masculine” odors.

With the new increase in Axe’s popularity, students can be sure to find more of their peers following in this trend. Axe has already revealed that this new product is already sure to be a hit amongst consumers, with all of the recognition and virality it is receiving online.

Considering this alongside the new promotion it will get at Mills, stu-

dents at Mills High School should expect to see (and smell) how this trend spreads throughout the community from passing by students in the hallway to P.E lockerooms.

Rachel Cheng Staff Writer

Michael Lin Staff Writer

MILLS PRIDE: Senior Daniel Gao practices for the upcoming Mills school anthem below the speaker.

Michael Lin Staff Writer CENTER COURT: Students gather to sing in

Rachel Cheng Staff Writer

NEW: Axe’s newest products of 16 in one shampoo.

Minimum GPA for Student-Athletes Raised to a Shocking 3.0

Joshey Alcantara Staff Writer

Hard news recently hit all public highschools of the San Mateo district. The new minimum GPA requirement for student-athletes to continue their sports has been raised to a 3.0. Starting next school year, this new regulation will be set in motion during the beginning of the fall sports seasons. Many student-athletes across the district have sent many complaints regarding the new standard for athletes to play. Their claims say that the bar has been set to high and may severely damage their sports careers. Parents have also given school staff and faculty a piece of their minds by banding together to address these unfair standards. Parents are concerned about not being able to see their kids play in the sports they worked so hard for. “Playing a sport that you have passion for should not come with such a high price,” states a soccer mom from Mills High School. Many frustrated parents have gone out on strike to defend the future of their children’s sports careers outside the schools.

Although most people may see this new change as unfair and too large of a change, it can be seen in a more positive perspective. If student athletes truly want to continue the sports they play, schools will encourage them to earn their right to play. This way all athletes will have a higher chance of being accepted into universities. Players

who fully invest in their sport can be considered a gamble considering the fact that not all highly skilled

players get the recognition they deserve. Attracting scouts and other recruiters would only be a reliable

option in power house schools such as Serra, St. Ignatius, Sacred Heart Cathedral, etc. This is why the San

Mateo district public schools believe that if athletes can maintain a higher GPA, they will be left with a better plan B option when sports may not go their way. Although students may currently disagree with this decision, in the far future they may be grateful for the opportunities it has presented to them. Many students have already started to submit transfer applications for out of district schools. This new trend will potentially allow students to keep playing their sport without having to maintain a higher GPA. Regardless, school faculty says that they plan to stay firm on their new regulation even though it may cost sports programs to perish. With not as many athletes making grades, smaller sports programs have been put at risk. This issue may cause a domino effect considering that sports league brackets may change over time if teams from the San Mateo district can not pull together enough players to take the field or court. Varsity football player Kai Hernandez (11) states “an abrupt change like this is not fair to the student body.” Worried if he and his fellow teammates will make grades Hernandez preaches that the district needs to reevaluate their decision on the new change. According to the majority of the team, college should not be enforced onto students if they do not plan on going in the first place. Not all student athletes plan to continue their education after high school, making the requirement useless. If anything, the new standard should be consulted with athletes prior to establishment.

Mills High Physical Education to Introduce New Curling Unit

2023-2024. It seems unreasonable, but faculty are unwavering in this new system-changing decision.

OnApril 1st, 2023, the MHS (Mills High School) board announced that Mills will shorten a few PE units with a DIY curling unit in an attempt to avoid injury and damage. The new unit will begin for the following school year

The reason for this replacement was stated in the message the Mills Administrative Team sent out on Aeries. “Due to the constant damage of equipment and injuries, the PE units lacrosse, softball, badminton, and floor hockey will be shortened, and the leftover time will be transferred to a safer unit: curling.”

Although equipment-centered units are typically favored, it has been set to dissolve for the following year, due to students getting too aggressive in the sport, injuring each other and breaking hand-held equipment. The altered curling will consist of wiffle balls, a larger ball, and floor hockey sticks. Students will be put in groups of five to play. The game will begin with the floor littered with wiffle balls. The first student

will roll the bigger ball, while the other four students will hit the wiffle balls away lightly from the path of the larger ball. The rules will be further determined by the PE teacher’s meeting on the matter on April 20th, about two to three weeks from now.

Already, a large amount of the faculty is very supportive of the new decision. Mr. Moss, one of the PE teachers at Mills, states, “Students kept damaging the equipment, especially the badminton rackets because they’re extremely fragile. Badminton rackets are not cheap in the slightest. We hope that shortening the units will lower the risk of our expensive equipment being broken.”

Considering that there are more or less 40 students per PE class, the reparation costs of hand-held equipment alone can eventually rack up to a significant amount. The new curling unit reuses more durable equipment in a calm, low-risk environment, all while including good cardio and arm workouts. The benefits of the new curling unit are an appealing idea to several of the Mills community including the board, PE teachers, and even parents.

In addition to the Aeries message, the school has released a plan online on how they will execute a smooth transition into curling throughout the year. The board plans to include curling as a short unit sev-

eral times a year, with a total of four times during intense weeks such as around finals and before midterms. Since the variation of curling is very versatile, students would be able to play curling as a substitute for any unit other than swimming.

Although the idea is overall safer and ideal, some students are against the idea. Annie Chang (9), complains, “This idea is idiotic. The so-called curling unit is messy and everywhere. I don’t understand why we have to do such a boring sport four separate times.”

Another freshman, Thomas Liu, confesses, “I mean, it’s okay but I can’t imagine hitting wiffle balls away for like an hour and thirty.”

Although students’ opinions on the change are important, small opinions will not be able to change the board’s new decision of adding curling to the school PE curriculum. However, if the change does arise as a problem in the near future, there is a possibility that the idea will be scrapped. Overall, adding curling into the curriculum was the optimal decision for avoiding the risk of injury and damage, the main reason as to why the Mills PE unit decided to adopt curling in the first place. Curling seems like it will be here to stay. It may even serve as a gateway to other unique sports that will be introduced to Mills later on.

JoShey alcantara: Thunderbolt

FOOTBALL: A heartfelt moment between a player and coach that may never occur again given the new GPA requirement.

Jessica Poon Staff Writer

poon Thunderbolt

CURLING EQUIPMENT: Graphic evidence of the curling equipment that Mr. Moss has ordered from Amazon.

JeSSica poon: Thunderbolt

CURLING: Mills alumni Reggie-Matthieus III showing off his curling skills.

Mills Swim Season to Be Canceled Due to Dead Rat

Jamie Wong Staff Writer

Earlier this week, the Mills swim team’s season unexpectedly came to an end after a dead rat was found in the pool. “We were taking the pool covers off as usual so we could start practice until someone started screaming,” recalled a Mills swimmer. “I ran over and then I saw a dead rat floating in the water.” After the entire swim team had an opportunity to crowd around the rat, take photos, and poke at the rodent with sticks, they began to realize that someone was going to have to remove the rat from the water. Unlucky swimmer Zachel Zheng (12) was chosen to dispose of the deceased rodent. “Wow it was stinky,” Zheng stated about her experience with the rat. “It was hairy, and there was dirt floating off of it. I picked it up and one of the legs twitched. I don’t even know if it was actually dead or not.”

After the rat was removed, the swim team alerted school administration to the incident, who ordered that the pool be drained of the contaminated water and for it to undergo a deep cleaning. For the rest of the school year, students walking past the pool will see cleaning crews decontaminating and refilling the pool with clean water. “I just don’t understand why it’s going to take the entire rest of the school year to

decontaminate the pool. If you ask me, it seems more like a one or two week thing,” one unhappy swimmer commented. Some students believe that there may be more to the long wait for the pool to reopen than cleaning the pool. “To be honest, this isn’t the first time I’ve seen a rat running around the pool deck. I think the real reason it’s going to take so long to clean the pool is actually because they’re finally going to call a rat extermination company,” one member of the swim team speculated. “It’s about time. I’m tired of my after practice snacks being stolen by the rats.”

Although the Mills swim season is considered by many to be canceled, the swim team remains hopeful that they will be able to proceed with their regular training and season. “After I explained the unfortunate situation with the rat, the Capuchino swim team graciously offered to let us share their pool,” said the Mills swim coach. Many members of the Mills swim team, seniors especially, are happy that there is some chance at a somewhat normal season. “This is definitely not how I imagined my final season going, but at least it’s still happening,” stated one senior swimmer.

Unfortunately, not everyone is as excited about the decision for the Mills team to share the Capuchino pool. “I’m not sharing the pool with people who have been swimming in rat water,” a member

of the Capuchino swim team complained. Some Mills swimmers are deciding to not swim at all this season, like Zheng. “Having to pick up the rat out of the pool was my last straw. I’m traumatized for life, and I’m pretty sure I have a rash on my

hand from touching the rat,” she exclaimed. Other swimmers cited the inconvenience of having to travel to Capuchino as their reason for not participating in this season. “With the decreased number of swimmers, it will certainly be more difficult

for us to compete at meets, but I believe that those of us that are left are going to do our best to represent our school,” one Mills swimmer expressed. “And at the very least, we can look forward to swimming in rat free water next season.”

Mills to Incorporate Military Style Training In PE Unit

the world, and is the main focus of Operation SL: to give every first and second year student full-on BUDs training instead of the basic physical education. How this will work in terms of integrating it into the school system, is fairly simple according to Mr. Moss. The students will now be required to arrive on Campus first thing at 5 o’clock in the morning, and are required to do a 3 hour warm-up before their actual school hours start. Once school starts, their PE classes, whether at 1st or 2nd period, will contain the newly incorporated BUDs training which includes obstacle courses, breathing exercises (most being underwater using the on-campus swimming pool), and even being under the pressure of gunfire and sounds of war. Many of the teachers approve of this new integration as they believe it will finally stop students from being “undisciplined little gremlins” on campus.

However, some teachers do happen to believe that this project is too dangerous for some students. Many teachers are claiming that “the students will be more tired than our already exhausted student athletes,” and that the school board is insane for going through with the operation. In response, Mr. Moss has re-

sponded to the allegations with, “it is expected that there will be some casualties. But we don’t teach natural selection for nothing.” The interview ended up being leaked online going viral in a matter of minutes, and now parents have also joined the protest by not allowing their kids to arrive on campus until the designated school hours occur or just straight up keeping them home. Mr. Moss once again stated, “Natural selection at its finest. Only the strong survive. They learn about it all the time in school. It’s time they apply it.” In hopes of creating a small number of Super Students, there have so far been no changes of heart in the school board and it is said that Operation SL will start a week after the treaty had officially been signed. “It would have started as soon as the day it had been agreed upon had the large amount of military equipment needed not taken so long to arrive,” said Ms. Mughannam. In response, a large majority of the Mills parents and students have agreed that it is just military propaganda for recruitment purposes. Whether or not each side is correct, Mills is now officially training with military tactics in play. All the equipment needed is expected to arrive by the next school year.

A

Brendan

Phimsoutham Staff Writer

exercise designed

As of April 1st, 2023 staff of the Mills High School Athletic department had a confidential meeting with United States Military officials at a blacksite somewhere in the Ap-

palachian Mountains. The meeting concluded with PE teacher Mrs. Mughannam in charge of a new project known as “Operation Superior Learner,” which in an interview was stated to be the process of molding our students into the most “physically elite of all high schools.”

In terms of Physical Education, Mills High School has always been

burn the biceps, give splinters, promote teamwork, and get sunburned. an on and off season for their athletic department. So much so that PE teacher Mrs. Mughannam has felt the need to finally bring the school board the idea of incorporating far more disciplined tactics into training students. The United States Navy Seals’ “BUDS” training is said to be one of the most brutal and difficult types of physical training in

military

to

Thunderbolt BUDS EXERCISE #2: A military exercise designed to strengthen the core.

Reality TV Show is Expected to Film at Mills Next School Year

Abigail Chai Staff WritEr

Whenmost students think of Mills, their first thought usually wouldn’t be, “this would make a great place for a reality TV show to take place!” However, that’s not what ABC (American Broadcasting Company) thought when they came across our school back in January this year. For some time, ABC has been discreetly looking for the star of their next big project: a reality TV show centered around an American public school. They scoured the nation looking for a highschool of interest, and after hundreds of schools from state to state, they settled on the one and only, Mills High School.

In an exclusive email to Dean Christian sent back in early February, ABC disclosed some general details about the show and their broad idea of it. The show will similarly follow the same format as other popular shows such as The Office, Abbott Elementary, and Modern Family, however instead of being a mockumentary (a film or show which displays fictional events in a nonfiction-

al manner), the show will be purely authentic. “We want to really showcase this school and its students as it is, so we prioritize 100% authenticity while filming,” an executive from ABC explained in their email.

ABC also mentioned their active search for the “main characters” of their series. The show won’t focus on merely one student, but instead a handful of students from varying grade levels. In a Google form that is soon to be sent out to all students, any student could apply to be the potential “star”. Sophomore Phoebe Piserchio voiced her excitement for the series and which one of her peers could be the possible central focus of the show.

“I love watching Modern Family and Abbott Elementary, so the fact that a similarly formatted show will be filmed at Mills is insane,” she vocalized. “I don’t think I’ll apply to be a main character or anything, but I’ll definitely be encouraging my friends to fill out the form.”

When asked about the show, Dean Christian mentioned his initial concerns and skepticism surrounding the series. He was initially worried of students’ privacy, often considering the mass attention that would be soon brought to the school. He states, “It

Mr. Hensley’s Acting Debut

I will have to leave the week after spring break, so I’ll be unable to teach during that week,” Hensley stated.

At the beginning of this year, Disney announced an upcoming high school musical featuring our very own Kelly Hensley and it has caught the attention of many Mills students. There were mentions that a highschool teacher auditioned to perform on a Disney movie, and now it is confirmed that Hensley is in fact the teacher that auditioned for the film.

Hensley is an English teacher here at Mills who auditioned for an extra as “teacher #5”. It was a major surprise to the students in his class, who heard about it first. Remarks like, “no way!” and, “this can’t be real” were said all around. Another student, in response to the news, exclaimed, “I was really excited when

When he first auditioned for a role, he had originally intended to get the part of “teacher #4” instead. “At first, I tried to get the role of teacher #4, but when I finished my lines, I sadly didn’t make the cut.” He tried again but instead auditioned as teacher #5, and he finally made it. Now, he is supposedly going to be performing in Florida where the movie is taking place. As a minor role, Hensley won’t be on screen for much of the show.

“I only have a few lines so at most I will be on the screen for a few minutes or be talking in the background,” he said. Along with Hensley, other actors in the movie include child Disney stars Zac Efron and Zendaya.

Ever since it has been announced that Hensley will be making his acting debut in the musical, one frequent

the Disney musical was announced, and I’m even more excited now that Mr. Hensley is in it!” According to Hensley, it was very difficult to get the role. “There was a lot of competition for the part as many talented people were auditioning with me for teacher #5,” he explained. “I was shocked, and it was such a surreal feeling to be casted.” However, while there is a lot of anticipation over Hensley getting the role, there is also a bit of worry about whether or not he will have to leave teaching to pursue this new opportunity. “Unfortunately,

question that has been asked is: “Will Mr. Hensley be acting in other movies now?” Hensley himself has said that chances are slim whether he will be in any other films. Still, many students want him to continue and perform in movies. “I hope that he continues to act in movies, it is amazing that a teacher from our school is in famous movies like these,” expressed a student. The fact that a teacher from Mills is going to be on the big screen is wonderful for all the students and staff here at Mills, and we can’t wait to see where Mr. Hensley goes next.*

was a big decision to be made, and we thought about it for a while. Our number one concern was the students and how it’d affect them.” At one point, both the district and him were heavily considering rejecting ABC’s offer, however, they ultimately decided to authorize production. “After heavy consideration, we’ve decided to approve the series, but if there is any probable threat towards

Word

students’ physical or mental health during filming, we will quickly reassess our agreement with ABC.”

MILLS HIGH: Famous television studio “ABC” plans to star Mills in a new reality show for the 2023-24 school year. to apply to be a central figure of the show, a paper consent-waiver will be sent out to all attending students of the 2023-2024 school year. The waiver will disclose the legal aspects of choosing to appear on screen, and ultimately if students consent to being on camera or not. The upcoming show marks a new chapter for Mills, undoubtedly bringing a lot more attention and fame to the school!*

ABC has yet to confirm the exact date of when production will go underway, but it is expected to begin the next school year. As of now, the school and the broadcasting company are thoroughly going over the legalities and technicalities of the show. Along with the Google form

Search Puzzle: April Fool’s Edition

april fools celebrate flowers spring break fun joke laugh prank scheme sun suprise vacation

PHOTOGRAPH by Abigail Chai

Eduardo Galindo Aguilar Staff WritEr

PHOTOGRAPH by Eduardo Galindo Aguilar

KELLY HENSLEY: Mr. Hensley’s last week at school before flying to Florida to film.