The McGill Tribune Vol. 22 Issue 11

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McGILL Vol. 22 Issue 11

RIBUNE

Published by the Students' Society of McGill University since 1981

Tuesday, November 12, 2002

T ra n s c rip t d e la y s a n g e r a p p lic a n ts Nathan Lebioda

NATHANLEBIODA Andrew Cook (3) eludes the Stinger’s defence, aiding the Redman in a 10-6 victory in the QIFC conference finals.

Law m ay p riv a tiz e 3

Le Q u é b e c k e r O p in io n / E ditorial

7

B rody B row n F eatures

10

S ig u r Ros A r t s & E n t e r ta in m en t 1 7

Q IFC aw ard s S ports

See TRANSCRIPT, page 2

p a u | B a r m a n is t h e J e w i s h E m i n e m

i n s i d e

N ew s

McGill students applying to graduate schools or looking for full­ time employment are suffering delays in the processing o f transcript requests because the McGill Direct Services Office is in the middle o f a technology transition period. The office is sending explanation letters to recipients o f tardy transcripts.

The department in charge of distributing transcripts to educa­ tional and professional institutions has recently upgraded to the new BANNER system for transcript dis­ tribution. Furthermore, the former manager o f the department, Kevin Thornhill, abdicated his position in early O ctober, in exchange for employment with Champlain College. The position was left vacant for nearly one month, until administrator Patrick O ’Neil was selected as the new manager o f Direct Services. But it is the ineffi­ cient requisition process that makes a blueprint for breakdown.

Under the current system, stu­

dents fill out paper forms listing all the institutions to which official transcripts should be sent. The form is then placed in a drop box by the student, where it will be picked up and entered into a computer by an employee at a later date. This administrative processing stage is where the botdeneck occurs. “We are currently experiencing an eight working day delay in processing transcripts,” said O ’Neil.

Many students worry that delays will cause their transcripts tu arrive after submission deadlines.

Some students were even told that their request forms were misplaced.

“I was told that they [the tran­ script office] had received my requi­ sition form, but had misplaced it,” said a recent graduate o f the Faculty o f Arts who wished to remain anonymous.

“We are aware o f the delays, and have opted to courier all tran­ script requests received in the last m onth,” ensured O ’N eil, who added, “We are aware o f the various

20

“E d u c a tio n is th e a b ili ty to lis te n to a n y t h in g w i t h o u t lo s in g y o u r te m p e r. ” — R o b e r t F ro st

Heather Kitty Mak My friend decribed M C Paul Barman to me as “the Jewish Em inem ” several years ago when his debut EP, I t ’s Very Stim ulating, came out. In m y m ind, I pictured a T olstoy-reading, yarm ulkesporting, trash-talking thug. This was in stark contrast to the M C Paul Barman that was at La Sala Rosa last Sunday: a lanky, slightly m yopic guy w ith a jewfro.

Barman, for the record, resembles a skinnier Weird A1 Yankovic.

Thankfully, the two are n ot relat­ ed.

Indeed, Em inem and M C Paul Barman do have their sim i­ larities. For one thing, both are black sheep in the hip-hop world.

Both are protégés to hip-hop’s finest— Em to Dre as Barman is to Prince Paul. Both are highly clever individuals who love pok­ ing fun at society. But this is where all the similarities end.

W h ile m ost hip-hopper heads proclaim their upbringings in the ghettos or the projects, M C Paul Barman is an Ivy League-educated Jewish guy from the Jersey ‘burbs, and he w ouldn’t have it any other way. W hile oth ­ ers are talking about their bling,

bitches and Escalades, Barman dwells on Nermal, Lisa Loeb and condom s thicker than snowsuits.

It’s this geek aesthetic that has garnered him critical acclaim , landing I t ’s Very S tim u la tin g in Rolling Stone as one o f the top 50 releases o f 2000.

Barman is very w ell-read, and it shows— he namedrops the high brow, the low brow and all the brows in between. N o one is spared— everyone from Sigourney Weaver, to the m ost obscure o f Polish visual artists, to N oam Chom sky are included in his songs. I’d be dam ned if E m inem did that (M oby and

N*Sync who?).

Barman’s lyrical sophistica­ tion is further witnessed in his use o f palindromes. In one o f his songs, “Bleeding Brain Grow,” he devotes several bars to this underappreciated art. “Mika, RZA, Evil JD , Nasir is Osiris, and J-live / I’m anomie. I, m on am i.” You see, there is som e m ethod to the m adness know n as M C Paul Barman.

W hich brings us to the point o f this story, the concert this past Sunday at La Sala Rossa.

See MC, page 15

“THISISWHEREWESHOWTHENATIONWHATWE’REMADEOF McGILLREDMENVS. SASKATCHEWANHUSKIES M IT C H E L L B O W L S H O W D O W N A T M c G IL L

McGill

• • •

One victory away from the Vanier Cup • One win away from a chance at the top prize One last Game at M0LS0N STADIUMto cheer on the REDMEN One final chance to show the country WHO THE BEST FANS IN CANADA ARE!

THIS SATURDAY, November lGth, 2:30 pm Molson Stadium

Something special is about to happen in 2002. BE THERE to experience it.

McGill AT H LET IC S

2 News The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002

M a y b e a ll t h e y n e e d is a s h o t in t h e a r m A r t s R e n a i s s a n c e r e s o u r c e c a m p a i g n a i m s t o b r i n g f a c u l t y i n t o 21 s t c e n t u r y Jennifer Jett Arts Renaissance, an ambi­ tious campaign launched earlier this year, has been promoted by administrators in the Faculty o f Arts as a way to obtain more resources and to improve the qual­ ity o f arts education.

T he campaign has four com ­ ponents. T he first involves attract­ ing talented students, partly through making a greater number o f entrance scholarships available to undergraduate and graduate students. Secondly, new faculty members are being hired in an effort to lower the student-to-staff ratio. Arts research will be empha­ sized with more the help o f a newly hired research officer. The fourth aspect o f the campaign— expanding teaching and research space— will be addressed by the construction o f a new Arts build­ ing on the corner o f Peel and DrPenfield.

Student to staff ratio T h e m ost visible result o f these efforts is the presence o f newly-hired professors.

In 1994, the student to staff ratio in Arts was 17 students to one professor, according to outgo­ ing Dean o f Arts Carman Miller, but has since climbed to 27 to one.

The present ratio in the Faculty o f Arts is significantly higher than the university-wide average, he added.

In response to what Miller called an “intolerable” student-tostaff ratio, the university approved the hiring o f 50 tenure-track pro­ fessors by 2004. That number was specifically calculated to lower the ratio o f students to professors in understaffed departments, bring­ ing them closer to the university average.

“I think what that decision reflects is a recognition that Arts is in fact part o f the core o f the uni­ versity and that it’s important and that you’ve got to do it right,” said Christopher Ragan, associate dean

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date departments whose offices are currently scattered across campus.

The $ 2 5 -m illio n second phase o f construction, which will be funded mostly by private donors, will provide Arts with more overall space.

“We as a faculty, we’ll have more space for undergraduate study lounges, for reading room s, for com puter labs, for classroom s,” Ragan said.

In addition to classrooms and offices, the new Arts building w ill provide space “where students can m eet to do the kinds o f creative activities that are as im portant to their intellectual devel­ JENNYGEORGE opm ent as what goes on in the classroom,” If the student-to-faculty ratio decreases, students will be able to meet in smaller groups.

Miller said. “Students don’t often have the places they grants the Faculty o f Arts receives. really need, where they can talk, “T he name o f M cGill and the G etting grants they can think, they can work reputation o f the researchers will These professors are not the together.” only new faces at McGill. Research be better served by this,” she said.

T he Arts Renaissance cam­ Miller believes the research officer Dr. Jo Ann Lévesque was hired in early September. Arts is m oney Arts receives could triple as paign was announced as Miller entered the final year o f his term as the first and only faculty at McGill a result o f this renewed emphasis. dean, which ends May 31. A com ­ “Already M cGill is a leader in to employ a faculty-based research Canada in terms o f the dollars per m ittee will investigate a replace­ officer. m ent for Miller and make a deci­ “The Faculty o f Arts needs capita,” he said. “But I think given sion within the com ing months. the quality o f our appointments more grants,” Lévesque said, “and “I think we need a dean who’s I’m here to help researchers to suc­ that we could be doing much bet­ going to take [the Arts ter.” ceed in their applications.”

Renaissance] seriously and who Lévesque will guide faculty, w ill take whatever m om entum C onsolidation and including the professors hired this we’ve got as o f M ay 31 and build intellectual space year, in applying for research The arrival o f additional pro­ on it,” Ragan said. “There are grants both at the federal and fessors is accompanied by a need other longer-term priorities, but provincial level.

“Her job is going to be to get for expanded space for teaching many o f those longer-term priori­ ties will be more easily achieved if us to think more carefully about and research.

The $ 15-million phase one o f the Arts Renaissance itself the number and the quality o f the the new Arts building will consoli­ achieved.” research grants that we, as a facul­ o f resources and technology for the faculty. “Classes that are teeming with students aren’t a way to do it right.”

ty, subm it,” Ragan said.

By increasing the quality o f research proposals, Lévesque hopes to increase the am ount o f research

T r a n s c r ip t

• Does your group need funding? • Planning a major speaker event? • Are you starting a student 0

'

publication? • Holding a major conference at McGill? < Are you part: of a an Athletic d u b Team that desperately needs funding? • Is no one funding your group? •

If one

SSMU su pp orts a ll sorts o f clubs and s tu d e n t g ro up s th ro u g h th e C am pus Life Fund fo r m a jo r events and special p ro je cts o n th e d o w n to w n M cG ill cam pus.

A p p lica tio n fo rm s are available in English o r French a t th e SSMU Front Desk (B row n 1200). W e receive a pp lica tion s a t any tim e b u t it is strongly suggested th a t you s u b m it th e m a m in im u m o f six w eeks before yo u r event.

For m ore in fo rm a tio n on th e Cam pus Life Fund contact: C olin Valeri, SSMU Treasurer at 398-3001 x0 9 2 4 9 o r at treasurer@ ssm u.m cgill.ca

m a ilin g

Continued from page 1 deadlines imposed by institutions such as the OLSAS, NSERC, LSDAS, LCCS among many oth­ ers... If students have any concerns with regards to their transcripts being sent out in time, they should not hesitate to contact us.”

O ’Neil recognizes a need for change and would like to reduce the transcript processing and mailing time to three days. When asked about future plans to expedite this essential service, O ’Neil offered sev­ eral suggestions. “Sometime in the New Year, we hope to have new ter­ minals in which students can key in their requests, rather than filling out the form ... [W]e also hope to have a web-based module to allow stu­ dents to make requests,” he said.

In the short term, O ’Neil hopes to increase the amount o f signage in the Registrar’s Office, in order to allow students to serve themselves.

Currently, students must take a number and wait in long lines.

Once their numbers are called, the attendant often directs them to a

d e la y e d

counter in a hidden hallway, which contains many o f the forms students require. Many students are outraged after spending 45 minutes in a line­ up only to be shown a stack of papers around the corner. These front-end solutions, however, will not solve back-end administrative problems. By making the transcript request process more efficient for students, the administrative person­ nel handling these requests may become overwhelmed.

All transcripts being distributed have a letter from the Registrar’s Office outlining the difficulties they are having processing the requests in a timely manner. The letter also requests that the receiving institu­ tion not penalize the student if the transcript was not received within an allotted time period. Although it is safe to assume that students will not be penalized, McGill’s reputa­ tion may be tarnished if large organ­ izations, educational institutions, and professional societies believe that the university’s inability to complete a transcript request reflects on their ability to educate students.

The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002 News 3

M ed a d m is s io n s to u g h e n

Poppies to remember

Nathan Lebioda Medical school may have the most competitive admissions stan­ dards o f all graduate disciplines, yet as more graduates find themselves unable to find suitable employment with an undergraduate science degree, applications to medical schools have increased substantially.

To be considered for admission to medical school at McGill, appli­ cants must have a minimum GPA o f 3.5 in a science program and an MCAT score o f at least 30, but those who get in often exceed these minimums. The average GPA and M CAT score for an individual admitted to McGill Medicine are 3.73 and 30.55 respectively.

Furthermore, applicants who are not residents o f Quebec face com­ petition that increases exponential­ ly, with only seven out-of-province and 22 international students accepted into the 160 member class.

Outstanding test scores and high grades will get an application read, but are no guarantees o f acceptance. At McGill Medicine,

PATRICKF0K Students aspiring to to med school will have to think fast to make the grade. the Admissions Committee stresses the importance o f extracurricular activities. If an applicant’s high GPA and MCAT are not accompa­ nied by activities other than study­ ing, like sports, student government or the arts, his chance o f admission is smaller.

Current and potential medical

students are pleased that the Quebec governments recent deci­ sion to rescind controversial Bill 114 only increases the competition applicants are facing. Students no longer have to fear being drafted into a remote community upon graduating from a Quebec medical school.

WfWmLtVmUVroftJ A veteran hands out poppy pins to remember Canada’s fallen heroes.

W ill w o r k f o r t u i t i o n : L a w s c h o o l m o n e y w o e s Laura Saba M cGill’s Faculty o f Law, eager to respond to funding shortages, is exploring new proposals to raise

at an October 30 general meeting organized by the Law Students’ Association “to waylay any fears the students might have that the faculty is going about this behind their backs,” said Rachel Smith,

public.

Despite discussions that may change both how and how much law students will pay for their edu­ cation, Law remains an attractive destination.

“McGill Law is particularly appealing to me because it opens many doors to me for when I grad­ uate. I’ll be prepared to work

almost anywhere, even in Europe,” said Danielle, a French U 2 Political Science student hoping to study law. This is because o f a trans-systemic program that offers bilingual education and “fully integratedcivil and com m on law graduate and undergraduate programs.”

Smith said that people should not overreact, because no resolu­

tions have yet been passed.

“The suggestion to privatize has been overly dramatized,” said Smith. “There are up to 10 differ­ ent options on the table.”

There w ill be an open fo ru m to dicuss the fu n d in g crisis on Wednesday a t 12:30pm in the M oot Court, Chancellor Day Hall.

Join Principal B ernard Shapiro “Undergraduate Education: the Challenges Ahead”

MAXIMLEWK0WSKI Students battled tuition hikes at the last Law Students’ Association forum. revenues, including privatizing the faculty to skirt the Quebec govern­ m ent’s tuition freeze.

To remain “a world leader,” the faculty needs to com e up with a way to finance changes “as it seeks to renew its professoriate and further develop its research and scholarship,” according to a state­ ment issued by the faculty.

Last w eekend at a faculty retreat, 43 members o f the senior and professorial staff discussed the law school’s goals for the future and the need for changes to the budget. They hope to formulate a plan to implement by the end o f the academic year.

Students provided their input

vice-president academic o f the LSA. “[The Adm inistration] is being very good about being up­ front with the students about their decision.. The students are being actively consulted, and no deci­ sions have been made.”

The many options were dis­ cussed with students, including privatization o f only certain pro­ grams within the faculty and a ‘social contract’ system that would mean that students would have to pay a percentage o f their salaries after graduation. Other proposals include deferring major payments until students have graduated, seeking alumni support and hold­ ing night classes for the general

In his last address to students as principal of McGill, Dr. Shapiro will share his views on the evolving state of undergraduate education. He will also answer your questions, so come out and speak up. % % \

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For more information, please contact Fred Sagel, VP University Affairs (398-6797) ua@ssmu.mcgill.ca

4 News The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002 James Grohsgal

N eW sB rIeF s Letting go and coming on Council voted to approve Students’ Society General Manager Guy Brisebois’ contract after an hour-long confidential session with Students’ Society legal advisor Jon Feldman.

The accounting department shuffle continued last week as Larrisa Kuhta replaced former accounts payable accountant Connie Locuratolo, who resigned last month. Lucy Nunez will take over for Blaise D ’Souza, who in late October was terminated from his position in accounts receivable.

Also, Thursday’s meeting was the last for Council Speaker JamyEllen Proud-Klevanic.

From the gallery, almost empty save the media and a clutch o f polit­ ical voyeurs (including former SSM U Vice-President Operations/Finance Kevin McPhee), Rod DeCastro took some shots at SSMU President Martin Doe. “Mr. President, referencing the hiring o f Larissa Kuhta in the posi­ tion o f accounts payable, I was won­ dering if you could speak to the issue that in this past year, the Treasurer, the Comptroller, the accounts payable, the accounts receivable, the general manager has terminated his contract, the CRO (Chief Returning Officer), Speaker, Recording] Sec[cretary], and an Arts Rep to SSMU have quit, so in hiring this latest employee, what assurance can we make... that this

person will stick around?”

“Yes, there have been a lot of departures, and that is very trou­ bling because it does take up a lot of the executive and the Executive Committee’s time,” said Doe. “The reasons... were brought up at differ­ ent points, including at confidential session with regard to direct employees. ... For most o f those, reasons are completely unrelated.”

On an unrelated note, Doe

Scuttlebutt detected in rezcrement probe Inter-residence rivalry has risen to distasteful extremes in recent weeks, according to sources within the Bishop Mountain Hall resi­ dences. Residents claim that on or around October 19, most o f the shower curtains were stolen from the bathrooms o f Gardner Hall, only to be found in that building’s elevator several days later.

KRISTENMALLORY The more civilized rezzies prefer throwing snow to biohazardous material. offered a notice o f motion for a bill to provide guidelines to the speaker on recognizing questions and speak­ ers from the gallery. His prior pro­ posal to restrict the gallery’s partici­ pation was rejected at Council’s October 24 meeting.

N ot long after this incident, resi­ dents o f Molson Hall awoke to an unpleasant smell emanating from their common room and elevator, where as-yet unnamed vandals had placed a substance that was initially identified as human excrement, although some Molson Hall execu­

v M c G ill T h e D e p a r tm e n t o f J e w is h

S tu d ie s

Call for Submissions: BLACHER AND G LASROT FAMILIES M EM O RIAL AWARD FOR HOLOCAUST RESEARCH Established by Mr. and Mrs. Josef Glasrot, survivors of the Holocaust and residents of Montreal. Open to any McGill student, the award will be pre­ sented for excellence in research in Holocaust and related studies, and par­ ticularly on the history of the Ghettos in Warsaw and Kovno [Kaunas]. The award is administered by the Department of Jewish Studies in cooperation with the Jewish Community Foundation. Presentation of the Blacher and Glasrot Families Memorial Award will take place at the Closing Exercises of the Department of Jewish Studies, in June 2003. The value of the Blacher and Glasrot Families Memorial Award is $1000.

• T h e c o m p e t it io n i s o p e n t o u n d e r g r a d u a t e a n d g r a d u a t e s t u d e n t s a t M cG ill U n iv e r s ity .

• S t u d e n t s m u s t s u b m it 2 t y p e d c o p i e s o f t h e ir e s s a y s .

tives have since asserted that it was rotten potatoes.

A Molson Hall porter who was involved in the clean-up said that the substance was found on tables, couches and carpets in the first-floor common room and study room, as well as in the elevator. He expressed with certainty that what he encoun­ tered was indeed fecal matter, and that a crew o f three workers had spent three to four hours that morn­ ing sanitizing Molson’s common areas.

There is little consensus among residents as to why such seemingly malicious activity would be taking place, and most students’ knowledge o f these events seems to be based largely on rumours, since InterResidence Councillors have been careful to keep their investigation under wraps. Some students on Bishop Mountain attribute these acts to harmless games between the residence buildings, but residence administration and floor fellows have stressed that they take such matters extremely seriously and have, therefore, declined to com­ ment on this situation, pending a full investigation.

— M ark Sward Grad advising inadequate The dearth o f graduate applica­ tion advising at McGill may put stu­ dents at a disadvantage when apply­ ing to graduate schools, according to Students’ Society Vice-President University Affairs Fred Sagel.

“There’s clearly a need for more advising because McGill has done'a poor job,” said Sagel. “We heed services to make students prepared for graduate schools, but McGill has no way to compete with US schools that have independent resources.”

“Larger US schools ofièr stan­ dardized tests like the MCATs, advising on the differences between major graduate schools, and the office edits statements o f purpose and gives advice on the application process.”

To improve McGill services on a smaller budget, Sagel said the Senate University Affairs Committee has asked SSMU to work with faculty associations and the Career and Placement Services

N eW sB rIeF s to ensure standardized graduate school advising.

Fire in Faculty Club basement

KATERHODES A fire in the Faculty Club Friday morning caused minor damage.

FEUQ fights differential tuition The Fédération des étudiant(e)s universitaires du Québec have approved the idea of hiring a research officer to investi­ gate the economic contributions o f out-of-province students in Quebec, with the hope that the findings will convince the provincial government to eliminate differential tuition fees for Canadians.

Students' Society VicePresident Comm unity and Government Nick Vikander and Vice-President University Affairs Fred Sagel attended a FEUQ confer­ ence at the University o f Sherbrooke this weekend, where Vikander said that executives from Université de Montréal student group FAECUM wanted the research to include inter­ national differential tuition and cover the social and cultural contri­ butions o f non-Quebeckers to Quebec society. While SSMU sup­ ports eliminating extra charges for international students, for this proj­ ect they targeted their efforts on the more likely possibility that tuition rates for all Canadians could be equalized.

Vikander said that SSMU and FAECUM were working on a com­ promise this week.

D J J a z z y J e f f a n d t h e F r e s h P r in c e w e r e r ig h t :

Parents ju s t don’t understand...

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• E s s a y s c a n b e b a s e d o n p r im a r y o r s e c o n d a r y m a te r ia ls .

• E s s a y s u b m is s io n s m u s t r e a c h th e D e p a r tm e n t o f J e w is h

M c G ill N i g h t l i n e 3 9 8 -M A I N

S t u d i e s O f fic e , 3 4 3 8 M c T a v ish S t r e e t , b y A p ril 2 8 , 2 0 0 3 .

T a lk a b o u t it w it h u s i n s t e a d .

• E s s a y s m u s t b e a c c o m p a n i e d b y fu ll c o n t a c t in fo r m a tio n .

Anonymous and confidential

___The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002

News 5

R e p u b l i c a n s u c c e s s a f f i r m s B u s h 's m e s s a g e Molly Kay Marra The Republican Party has regained control o f the United States Senate and increased its majority in the House of Representatives after last week’s midterm election victories.

The G O P’s share o f the House now stands at 226 to Democrats’ 204, with four races undecided. In the Senate, Republicans have 51 seats and the Democrats have 46, with Independent Vermont Senator Jim Jeffords giving Democrats another vote. A tight race in South Dakota has triggered a recount, and in Louisiana a runoff will be held because state law requires one can­ didate to get a majority o f votes.

Republicans can now set the legislative agenda in Congress, so the George W. Bush Administration hopes to make the sweeping tax breaks o f 2001 permanent, pass a domestic security bill and confirm Bush’s judicial nominees. However,

the GOP doesn’t have the 60 votes it needs to break a Democratic fili­ buster in the Senate.

Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle (D-SD) said that President Bush’s rhetoric on terrorism and Iraq, repeated in stump speeches Bush gave for Republican candi­ dates across the country, “resonated with the American people” and “trumped” the Democrats’ econo­ my-centred message.

The elections were made more unpredictable by the late replace­ ment o f Democratic N ew Jersey Senator Robert Torricelli by former Senator Frank Lautenberg because o f Torricelli’s resignation from the race; Congressional redistricting that eliminated some Congressmen’s old seats; and a few fumbles, like in Minnesota where former Vice-President Walter Mondale lost the Minnesota Senate race to Norm Coleman, former mayor o f St. Paul.

After Senator Paul Wellstone

was killed in a plane crash while campaigning for re-election, Democrats asked Mondale, who served under President Jimmy Carter, to run in Wellstone’s place.

Some absentee voters had already cast ballots for a candidate who was no longer alive, and only some absentees could recast their votes.

M ondale’s results suffered more because o f W ellstone’s memorial service, which some critics said turned into a campaign rally.

Canada looks south Republican control of Congress and the W hite House gives Bush a broader mandate to deal with national security and trade issues that affect Canada.

Bush now has Trade Promotion Authority, which gives him the power to send trade deals to Congress for a yes or no vote with­ out allowing Congress to make changes. Twin Republican majori­ ties will offer less opposition to

U21 Global, the online univer­ sity being set up by Thom son Learning, McGill and 14 other universities, will not begin offering courses in January as was originally planned. W ith many academic and technical details still being worked out, course offerings will probably not begin until much later in the year.

Am ong the issues still under consideration is how the online interaction between professors and students will work. Furthermore, the selection o f subject matter experts, who are responsible for the development o f course content, has not been completed.

T he establishm ent of U 21 Global is a joint venture between Universitas21, a consor­ tium o f 17 research intensive uni­ versities, o f which M cGill is a founding member, and Thom son Learning, an American division o f the Thom son Corporation. The private university will initially tar­ get the Asian market and offer Masters degrees in business and information technology.

The estim ated cost o f the project is $50-m illion (US) with M cGill contributing $ 5 0 0 ,0 0 0 (US).

Students’ Society President Martin D oe and others have ques­ tioned the ethics o f using public funding in this potentially risky for-profit venture.

However, M orty Yalovsky, M cG ill’s Vice-Principal Administration and Finance, explained the project should be seen as more o f an educational experience.

“W hat we hope to acquire from our participation is knowl­

Senate Seat Breakdown

to Canadian Foreign Affairs Minister Bill Graham’s fear that Middle Eastern birth or ancestry would be an automatic trigger, Ashcroft has now said that national origin is a secondary factor.

The US election results will not shake the foundation o f its rela­ tionship with Canada, but the affir­ mation o f the Bush administration’s approach to domestic and foreign affairs may prove a worrisome development for Canadians unhap­ py with the President’s current poli­ cies.

House of Representatives Breakdown ’04 Democrats

226 Repubbcar*

GRAPHSBYNATHANLEBIODA

U21 Global launch delayed, McGill still out $500,000 Matt Saunders

Bush’s trade policies. Also, Bush will be better able to entrench tightened security measures that were imposed at US points o f entry after September 11.

At Niagara Falls last week, US Attorney General John Ashcroft explained that the National Security Entry-Exit Registration System, which in the past eight weeks has fingerprinted and photographed 14,000 non-US citizens before they entered the United States, will not exempt Canadian citizens from being registered. However, contrary

edge and experience in this emerg­ ing area where many o f the initial players— including universities as well as private corporations— did not succeed for a variety o f rea­ sons,” he said.

Vice-Principal Research Ian Butler is M cGill’s Universitas21 manager and recently returned from a U 21 Conference in Australia. Butler also emphasized that this would be a learning expe­ rience, but explained that if a prof­ it is generated, it would get back to students.

“Any profits generated by the project will be channeled back to the university and invested into not-for-profit educational servic­ es,” assured Butler.

Although M cGill’s investment o f $500,000 may seem to be a lot o f money, it is only one third o f the estim ated $ 1 .5 -m illion that it would cost for McGill to set up and deliver a single on-line course.

“The risk o f this venture is sig­ nificantly less than what it would be if we tried to gain experience in this area on our ow n,” contended Butler.

Another issue o f concern has been the mechanism by which aca­ demic integrity will be maintained.

W hile M cG ill has licensed U21 Global to use its name and logo on the degrees it issues, quali­ ty assurance will be the exclusive responsibility o f U21Pedagogica, a w holly-ow ned subsidiary of Universitas 21. T he Academ ic Standards Council, which makes all final decisions approving or dis­ approving a program or subject, consists of the board of U21Pedgagogica and six professors from U 21 universities. M cGill Professor Alex W hitmore o f the Faculty o f Management is one o f

the six.

“U 2 1Pedagogica will have the final say on issues surrounding quality assurance,” Butler explained. “The board will be able to operate independently, without pressure from outside corpora­ tions.”

Staff and student awareness o f U21 Global has been rather limited at McGill, but Butler asserted that the university has not been inten­ tionally secretive.

“Up to this point there has not been a need for any campus-wide involvement,” he said.

“The idea was first put forth

by Principal Shapiro and had to be approved by a board w hich includes both staff and student representation. W hether or not they presented this information to the bodies they represent was up to them .”

W hile McGill has not been proactive in disseminating infor­ mation to date, more efforts are now being put forth to promote awareness.

“We are trying to be as trans­ parent as possible,” Butler explained. “[Principal] Shapiro will be making a presentation to Senate and I want to have a website set up to make this information accessi­ ble.”

In addition to U 21 Global, M cG ill’s m embership in Universitas21 has involved McGill in a number o f other activities.

These include faculty, staff, and student exchange programs, stu­ dent travel awards, and the devel­ opm ent o f an online Learning Resources Catalogue. The LRC is designed to allow professors from Universitas21 member universities to share teaching aids with each other.

WEB-SURVEY FOR NON-TENURE-TRACK ACADEMICS Career structure, compensation, opportunities for professional development, etc.

T h e N o n -T en u re Track A cadem ic P ersonn el Task Force needs y o u r help! T h e task-force, w h ich w as m andated by th e Principal, needs to know : • you r concerns a b o u t w o rk in g at M cG ill, • w h a t yo u appreciate a b o u t M cG ill, • y o u r view s o n h o w M cG ill can im prove its em p loym ent co n d itio n s and career structure for n on -ten u re track academ ics.

T o help o b tain in p u t th e task-force has com p iled a q u e stio n ­ naire, d esign ed to be com p leted in 2 5 m in u tes or less, w hich is available on -lin e at the M cG ill w eb page w w w .m cgill.ca /sta ff.

T h e task-force w o u ld like to encourage all n on-tenu re-track academ ics to com p lete this questionn aire. T h e deadline has recently been extend ed to D ecem b er 4 , 2 0 0 2 .

T h e task-force has eig h t m em bers, fo u r o f w h o m are elected representatives from th e n on-tenu re-track academics: S u z a n n e P e lle r in , English a n d French Language Centre, representing Faculty Lecturers a n d Sessional L ibrarians C iaran Duflfy, D ep a rtm en t o f Pediatrics, representing the G FTH F red erick M o r in , D ep a rtm en t o f Chemistry, representing Curators, Research Associates, Research Assistants a n d Professional Associates; a n d R o n a ld D iL a u ro , Faculty o f Music, representing Course Lectureres, Instructors a n d A d ju n c t Professors T h e o th er fou r task-force m em bers are: M a lco lm B a in es from M A U T ; R o b in E ley, D ean o f C o n tin u in g E ducation; S tu art P rice, A ssociate V ice-Principal; and C h r isto p h e r R agan , A ssociate D ean , F aculty o f A rts. In a d d itio n , th e task-force is assisted by a research officer, L in a D i G enova.

In order to ensure th a t o n ly n o n -ten u re track academ ics co m ­ p lete th e survey w e require th a t yo u give you r M c G ill I D n u m b er, and d a te o f b irth . H o w ev er, w e w o u ld like to stress th a t this n o m in a tiv e in fo r m a tio n w ill b e rem oved b y M A U T (M c G ill A sso c ia tio n o f U n iv ersity T eachers) b efo re th e re m a in in g data is p assed o n to th e ta sk -fo rce fo r analysis. A ll responses received w ill be kept co m p letely co n fid e n tia l, and th e data w ill be used o n ly in a m anner su ch th a t n o individual responses can be id en tified.

T h is in fo r m a tio n w ill b e u sed b y th e ta sk -fo rce to h elp fo r ­ m u la te its fin a l reco m m en d a tio n s w h ich w ill b e p assed o n to th e P rin cip a l.

THE TASK-FORCE LOOKS FORWARD TO RECEIVING TOUR COMMENTS

6Op/Ed The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002 O

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Evil lizards ain ’t news

“T h e n n o n e w a s f o r a p a rty , T h e n a ll w e r e f o r th e state; T h e n th e g r e a t m a n h e lp e d th e poor, A n d th e p o o r m a n lo v e d th e g re a t: T h e n la n d s w e r e f a i r l y p o rtio n e d ; T h e n spoils w e r e f a i r l y sold: T h e R o m a n s w e r e lik e b ro th ers I n th e b ra v e d a ys o f old. ” — “T h e L a y o f H o r a t i u s ” b y T h o m a s M a c a u la y

D e m o c ra ts m u s t b e s tro n g James Grohsgal______________________________________________ Last week's elections in the U nited States gave President George W. Bush the mandate to push through tax cuts and tort reform, decrease environmental and labour standards, sign unfair bilateral and multilateral trade agreements, confirm appointm ents o f conservative judges to the federal judiciary and go to war against terrorism and Saddam Hussein.

T he Democrats, split on Republican tax breaks and reluctant to object to a popular president's wars on Osama bin Laden and Saddam Hussein, have alienated their left-wing base by downplaying differ­ ences and pandering to swing voters, yet they have w on few friends am ong the Republicans and independents they were seeking in the election.

N ow that the Dem ocrats have two years to be an effective opposi­ tion rather than an ineffecitve leadership, the 109th Congress is a chance for redemption. T he Dem ocrats have lost influence, but have gained a platform from which to point out the failures o f Republican legislation on issues like prescription drug coverage for seniors, protec­ tion o f the Social Security trust fund and the return o f budget deficits.

Alone, advocacy for progressive policies will not put an end to the Dem ocrats’ lethargy, so their dry policy prescriptions should be accom ­ panied by a forceful reassertion that the D em ocratic Party embodies essential American values.

For the next two years, the Dem ocrats m ust defend their princi­ ples against Bush's econom ic and military policies until Bush's m onopoly on speaking for the American people has been undermined.

But none o f the current Dem ocratic presidential hopefuls yet appears brave enough to challenge the prodigal son o f big o f Texas. W hile the cost o f blocking the advance o f the right may be the political death o f a few left-wing Democrats, a collective surrender on big issues like war and taxes w ill mean the death o f the D em ocratic Party’s ideals.

T he machinations south o f the border appear ludicrous here because the earnestness that has characterized political discussion am ong Americans since September 11, w hen Bush linked the fulfil­ m ent o f his am bitions with the survival o f the nation, has been utter­ ly absent in Canada. Here, opposition to Bush’s warmongering is a given, but that same sentim ent, expressed by this writer in his N ew Jersey town, now sounds treasonous. In this city, w e m ock Bush in classrooms and cafés, but in the American town square he retains an aura o f infallibility. For Democrats, criticizing Bush for his jingoism before an American audience w ould be disastrous, but it may be the only way that m any Dem ocrats can counteract their formerly com pla­ cent acceptance o f the Bush administration's agenda.

the

M c G J L L T R IB U N E

It seems that the Tribune has sunk to a new low with their November 5 issue. As a student who looks towards the school paper for information, I was appalled that the headline read: “Big evil lizards rule the world.”

W hile the article itself was interesting to read, I do not believe that it was worthy o f being placed on the front page. A com m on excuse for such poor placement o f articles is “It was a slow news week.” Something far more impor­ tant happened in the past week that the Tribune had dedicated four full pages to: the FTAA strike. The protest has been considered an important forum for us students to express our beliefs, and certainly deserves better placement in the paper.

I congratulate the reporters on presenting a comprehensive account o f the strike, yet condemn the editors for not even placing some headline relating to the FTAA strike. The Tribune should first ask themselves what they wish to be: A serious publication dedicated to informing the McGill community, or some half-assed tabloid reduced to printing ridiculous stories on secret lizard rulers.

Nick Yeo U 3 Joint Honours History and Philosophy On the coverage and the FTAA I felt obligated to write a letter commenting on the Tribunes, gen­ erally negative, borderline sensa­ tionalist and gonzo coverage o f the anti-FTAA protests. Although it tended to be one-sided, probably the worst part was the titles chosen to head the articles (something

is an editorially autonomous newspaper published by the Students' Society of McGill University

Editor -In -C hief

N e w s Editors

Sp orts Editors

C o p y Editor

James Empringham

James Grohsgal Kate Rhodes

Mark Kerr Sarah Wright

Karen Kelly

Ph oto Editors

A d v e rtisin g and M a rk e tin g M an age r

A ssistant Editor -In -C hief

Raquel Kirsch Production M anager

Michael Liew

Features Editors

Natalie Fletcher Panthea Lee

Jenny George Nathan Lebioda

Entertain m en t Editors

O n lin e Editors

Ric Lambo Scott Medvin

John Gosset Lynne Hsu

Paul Slacnta A d Typesetters

Mike Bargav Siu-Min Jim

Staff: Mohit Arora, Dave Barclay, Paul Bredesen, Brody Brown, Thobey Campion, Daniel Chodos, Lauren Consky, Alexandra Dasser, Matt Dellinger, fetricia Faucher, Patrick Fok, F.d Gliicksman, Melanie Herscovitch, jennifer Jett, Dove Kanda-Foley, Catherine Kramarczuk, Maxim Lewkowski, Dannie Lin, Ben Madgett, Mike Mahoney, Kristen Mallory, Molly Kay Marra, jeremy Morris, Laura Saba, Matt Saunders, James Scarfone, Kathryn Sediakina, Mark Sward.

which the Tribune’s been criticized about before).

It was almost comical to see Kate Rhodes’ piece, under the heading o f “O n Peace and Violence: Two Very Different Kinds of Protests”.

She zealously enounced every single incident o f violence she could possibly come upon, hardly giving more then a few quotes about peacefulness.

Moreover, the pictures chosen to accompany the article only high­ lighted the negative aspects (I guess the average student holding a sign isn’t seen as important).

Molly Kay Mara’s [sic] article about concerns on the conse­ quences o f the FTAA, not once sug­ gested what was written as the title: “Student concern likely to fall on deaf ears”. As for James Grohsgal’s piece, it doesn’t even merit com­ ment, but it was funny to see that it was technically about “the message” o f the protest and technically news.

Although he was shocked to see people dressed as a bear or a dildo, perhaps he forgot it was also Halloween.

Alvaro José Castro Rivadeneira U3 Biochemistry

ents refused treatment,” does not depict a Christian Scientist church or family, but a Russian Orthodox icon o f the Archangel Michael.

N ot only is this reflective o f poor research in the.article, but is misleading, as Eastern Orthodoxy in fact finds medicine to be for the most part— and by this I mean including blood transfusions, a major point o f contention within the article— compatible with its doctrine and faith. Icons are also typical and doctrinally intrinsic to the Orthodox faith; the same can­ not be said o f either Christian Science or the Jehovah’s Witness Churches.

As an Orthodox Christian, I am concerned not only that proper techniques o f journalistic research may not always be employed in a student publication which prides itself on its professionalism, but that the icons o f Orthodoxy, which are for the faithful very sacred and holy objects, become merely the vehicle for expressing vague Christian or religious sentiment within the realm o f the printed word.

Christopher Sprecher U 4 German Literature/ Classics

Orthodox symbols betrayed The recent article on religious conflicts with medicine [“Dying for their cause: W hen religion conflicts with m edicine,” November 5th, 2002], though well written, betrays lacklustre journalism in terms o f picture-text coordination. The arti­ cle looks into the tension between religion and medicine primarily with the examples o f the Jehovah’s W itnesses and the Christian Scientist church. Yet the picture for the article, with the caption “a twoyear-old boy died from wasp stings because his Christian Scientist par­

THUM BS UP is

-B illy B is h o p -B rew s w ith R ahim at G e rt’s -O tta w a bureau -S h ish a

TH UM BS DOW N -A b s e n c e of R em e m b ra n ce D ay ce re m o n y on ca m p u s

Letters must include author's name, signature, identification (e.g. U2 Biolov.

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Columns appearing under 'Editorial' heading are decided upon by the editorial board and written by a member of the editorial board. All other opinions are strie : ly those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of The McCiii Tribune, its editors or its staff. Please recycle this newspaper.

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The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002 Op/Ed7 O

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aaBSesfw T h e le g a c y o f c lic k in g s o u n d c o u n t r i e s

I am going to begin this column with a quote from Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn’s Gulag Archipelago and I am going to end it with a dedica­ tion. Solzhenitsyn writes: “Many were shot— thousands at first then hundreds o f thousands. We divide, we multiply, we sigh, we curse. But still and all, these are just numbers.

They overwhelm the mind and then are easily forgotten.”

For some reason, I remember perfectly the day that I first heard the names “Hutu” and “Tutsi” on the radio. It was 1994, I was 12 and I joked to my mother that it was a bat­ tle between ‘hooters’ and ‘tooshies.’

We both giggled.

Little did we know; but some very powerful people in New York, Washington, Paris and Ottawa did know that the worst atrocity since the Second World War was taking place. Within the course o f 100 days, approximately 800,000 Tutsis and Hutu moderates were exterminated in Rwanda. Though a big number. It is almost an easy thing to say as it rolls off our tongues. Instead, read this: Most o f the victims were hacked to death with machetes. Red Cross workers witnessed people piling up,

mounds o f severed limbs and heads.

Women were gang-raped and then decapitated. A popular technique was to herd men, women and chil­ dren into churches, toss in a grenade and a tear gas canister to finish off the survivors. The murderers were not some dark force but the victims’ own neighbours. This all happened and the year was 1994.

There was a Canadian on the ground in Rwanda at the time, Major General Romeo Dallaire, the commander o f the UNAMIR peace­ keeping mission. General Dallaire had the tremendous tasks o f disarm­ ing the Hutu government forces and the Tutsi rebels, protecting aid work­ ers, ensuring democratic elections, retraining the gendarmerie and walk­ ing on water.

He asked for 7,000 troops; he received 2,500. His main contingent was a battalion o f Bangladeshis, who prompdy wet themselves and ran away the moment that guns were fired. After one week o f violence, Dallaire was reduced to a force of 450 exceptionally brave soldiers from Ghana, Tunisia and Canada.

Dallaire requested air support and armour. He received none. When the genocide began, he had two weeks’ worth o f food rations, two days’ sup­ ply o f water and no working tele­ phone. The U N left Rwanda to die.

Why did the major powers sit back and watch the world explode on CNN? Last year’s movie Black Hawk

Down retells the story o f US Special Forces’ heroic struggle through the streets o f Mogadishu. Unfortunately, the movie omits the aftermath of that tragedy. Following the death of the 19 US servicemen, President Clinton signed Presidential Direct Directive 25, which forbade US troops from participating in danger­ ous peacekeeping operations. The result was that the US refused to intervene in Rwanda. The lives o f 19 US servicemen were balanced against the lives o f 800,000 Rwandans, two million Zairians and 200,000 Burundians killed in spin-off crises.

The CLA and the US State Department were well aware o f what was taking place on the ground. A directive was circulated to all diplo­ matic personnel to describe the killings as “acts o f genocide” not “genocide” itself, which would have required immediate action under international law. Eichmann would have been proud.

France’s actions were much, much worse. As the major power in Africa, the country decided that it was in its best interests to support the racist Rwandan government. For 30 years, France supported, trained and armed the Rwandan govern­ ment and even had agents from the General Directorate for External Security on the ground during the killings. The French intelligence services knew o f the genocide up to a year in advance and they covered up

those facts. Then once the killings began, the French paratroopers land­ ed, airlifted all the foreign nationals (i.e. white people) to safety and got the hell out o f Dodge. The genocide intensified after that day. Canada was the silent collaborator, as guilty for what we failed to do as for what we did. The Canadian government, in sending a Force Commander to Rwanda, wanted to fly the flag at a minimum cost. This was a public relations operation, not a humanitar­ ian mission. The government knew o f the coming trouble through Dallaire’s secret memos. They did nothing. When the killing began, it was first to Canada that Dallaire begged for help. He got no response.

The Canadian government was happy to sit behind the rhetoric of “middle power.”

Dallaire, with a force o f 450 men, disobeyed U N orders to with­ draw and saved 28,000 lives. He asked, “How many more could I have saved if I had more troops?” To this failure o f humanity we have to indict the following people who should be spat upon. Kofi Annan, who was then Secretary General of U N peacekeeping operations, was more interested in protecting his career than saving lives. He deliber­ ately ignored cables from Dallaire warning o f the coming cataclysm.

Secretary o f State Madeline Albright, a former child refugee in the Second World War, stood in front o f the U N

General assembly and testified that there was no genocide occurring in Rwanda. French President Francois Mitterand, who stood on the tarmac .at Sarajevo airport denouncing the evil o f ethnic cleansing, meanwhile promoted policies which led to genocide in Rwanda.

Finally, Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chretien has no less betrayed the people o f Rwanda than the people o f Canada. He has com­ pulsively committed our nation to increasingly riskier foreign policy undertakings, while brushing aside the consequences of foreign policy on the cheap. Le petit gars de Shawinigan has been loud to trum­ pet Canadian values, but has always hid behind the term “middle power” when the going gets tough.

In the end, as this is Remembrance Day, I wish to finish this column with a dedication. I want to dedicate this article to my grandfathers and all those like them who chose to stand up to evil 50 years ago. They didn’t have to go over to Europe and fight and see their friends die for people they never met. My grandfather didn’t have to contract malaria in Italy and die prematurely when my father was 12. He and my other grandfather went to fight in Europe because that was the right thing to do. Let us hope that we, as their grandchildren, can remember their actions and do the right thing when called upon.

S e x y i m p e r f e c t i o n s d o it e v e r y t i m e Looking down at my feet, I notice my obscenely webbed toes. As a child, I was led to believe that my abnormal limbs would scare away good clean people. In kindergarten, I would expose my naked feet and chase herds o f squealing pig-tailed girls around the playground. During the summers, I would shamefacedly walk down the street in sandals, inducing violent nausea in passersby.

As a high school student, I wore sev­ eral layers o f socks, always cautious never to undress my feet in public.

On several occasions, I found myself poking a sharp knife at that small, revolting layer o f skin that joined my two toes. All I ever wanted was to be like the other boys who sported five fully distinct digits on their feet.

All that was to change; however, when I stepped foot in water.

Suddenly, my outlandish appendages transformed themselves into pro­ pellers; I cut through the water like butter. Before long, my anomaly was the talk o f the town. In school, my biology professor hypothesized that my feet were the next stage o f Homo sapiens’ evolutionary process, while my Physical Education teacher had me perform one-man aquatic demonstrations for the class.

Parties would await the arrival o f my feet, clad in my signature golden Adidas flip-flops. Whenever I sat down, girls would present me with footrests, offering to massage

my feet while I relaxed. It even trans­ formed my sex-life. Women would moan in ecstasy as I rubbed my duck-feet all over their smooth skin.

Sure enough, to this day, no woman can resist my strikingly webbed toes.

My peculiar saga o f tragedy and triumph is one of self-discovery. My initial insecurities were nonsensical; I was led to believe that everything outside o f societal norms was revolt­ ing. I was young, naïve and unsure of myself. Sadly, however, most individ­ uals still have not accepted their uniqueness. Tummy tucks, breast implants and muscle alterations all serve to modify peoples’ appearances towards what the general public deems sexy.

I guess it is time to'let everyone in on a little secret: Attractiveness is not universally applicable. Believe it or not, what you find revolting may be someone else’s sexual fantasy.

Heck, the Internet is littered with freaky sites dedicated to obese women and old geezer guys getting their groove-freak on.

First, let us start with the men.

A tight stomach and rippling biceps may score you points at the gym, but nothing beats a floppy set o f love handles in the sack. If you really want to attract the women, show off your individual savour by revealing those stretch marks. Furthermore, never forget that your droopy chin is a testament to your individuality.

Now, let us proceed to the women. Surprisingly, common sense has shown that sex appeal is not all about tits and ass. Girls’ first reaction to scars, pale skin and moles is to conceal them with creams, lotions

and fancy scarves. Your individual­ ism is beautiful. Burying it under layers o f Revlon only dims your splendour.

More often than not, it is the subtleties that make someone irre­ sistible. Most women are compelled by a man’s faint distinctiveness— his retarded laugh, misaligned dimples and frizzy fro. Every guy has

A ll N u r s e s

a n d

strength, vigour and testosterone; what sets you apart from the pack?

Learn to appreciate those allur­ ing differences. The way a pair of jeans sits on her hips, the way her lips slant when she smiles, the way her neck strains when she gets upset.

When I close my eyes at night, those are a girl’s subde characteristics that come to my mind.

S t u d e n t s

F ree A d m is s io n N o v e m b e r 24, 2 0 0 2 : 10h00 - 17h00 B a rre a u d u Q u éb ec, M e e tin g H a ll (2 n d flo o r) 445 b o u t. S a in t-L a u re n t, M o n tré a l, Q C N e a r P la c e d ’A rm e s M é tro Info: cnsa_ m cg ill@ h o tm a il.c o m 514.398.2825

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Buns o f steel and a six-pack are so nondescript; in reality, we focus on individual disparities. When I am asked to describe a girl’s physical characteristics, I find myself inca­ pable o f doing her justice. A crooked tooth, prominent buttocks, a birth­ mark are what most people them imperfections or blemishes— I call them beauty.

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8 Op/Ed The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002 O

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McGill Institute for the Study o f Canada We are never far removed from war, because armed conflict— or the threat o f it— is a constant in world affairs. September 11 brought home the fear o f open conflict onto our doorstep, as was our parents’ fear during the Cold War era. But the hot, intense wars o f recent memo­ ry— those that current undergradu­ ates remember best from live televi­ sion coverage— seem more distant than the wars o f the past, more dis­ connected from our lives than those that form part of , , ii- , n nrn :n 1937 I was a child during the war, our historical conI grew up as a Canadian rarity, an “army brat”, whose father was a caree^sdd that’took Remembrance Day very ciousness.

The usual m memory. ~ ° , , u ^ with^ranks rfllera Qf veterans and their ~way to early J scarce scraps of n s^ ocoughing u g h in g an ’ sputtering — — world wars o f the with the u seriously. Accordingly, Accordingly, II recall recall aa series series oo ff frosty » Afterwards, U Novewinded speeches.

Afterwards, adults adults could could retire retu to drink and reminisce while 20th century seem seriously. _____while clersv and politicians made long-winded speecnes.ru tlirre, more real because pneumonia, while clergy and politicians mad^ ° ^ ^ edd0SfPceremony faded when veterans succeeded in making Remembrance returned, I suspect, after Dr. Bette Stephenson Ontario s educathey directly affect­ “us kids” were left to thaw out as best we could. That ^ ^ stPudents about Canadas wars and sacrifices. While ed the lives o f so Day a statutory holiday in most provinces S en o**obs™ many people we tion minister in the 1970s, ordered schools to sta y ° P“ G teach peace or war, they and textbook publishers needed the prose I Pwhich had supplied a generous share of Canadas war dead, know or knew, who many teachers had trouble deciding whether t ey ’ anti_war activism. As usual when faced with conwere able to pass on was happy to provide, at a fair price. In Canadian univers ^ faded fast In my own suburban cornet of the University of their accounts of Remembrance Day was briefly a battleground between7 ^ students asked for it in 1986 and took on most of wartime, either as troversy, university officials retreated in confusion e v i v e d a student trumpeter with the music to play the civilians or as active Toronto, Erindale College, Remembrance r ^ on ^ these chores. Armed with my painful participants. Anot­ the organization. As principal, I recall hiring a m .h m piperar • Y and finisb within 10 minutes. That eliminated the oratory, her way o f consider­ Canadian army’s version o f Last Post and Reve g &newcomer with a foot in military history, a few stuing remembrance is prairie memories, my sole command was that the whole m> thanks to the Black Watch, I hired a piper to recall that many At McGill in 1995 or 1996, something of the same H a p p e ^ S ‘ A o f the benefits that dents came for advice. Shouldn’t something be ^ e Hall. The merely curious tended to stay, a crowc deveh young Canadians and gave advice. The event took place in the Arts KuAd_ g ^ Y Students took the initiative, planned and publicised enjoy in their daily oped, and McGill observed its first creditable Rente J j ears i n 2002, Ottawa officials have been persuaded lives, including post­ the event and carried on from thereto mote Dominion Institute has exploited the occasion secondary education to grow Remembrance Day into a Veterans Week, fr°™ N o v e m b S whUe the Royal Canadian Legion insists on and universal health for another display o f our historical ignorance an d ju r ne d fo r m U P pLmised to lower the flag for a single minute m[nute ^ Re brance Day fade care, were borne of two whole minutes of silence, not merely one. At McG 11 this year, the 1 ^ | ^ P ^ the determination to but cost-cutting has wiped out the staff needed g survivors of the Second World War seem suddenly very old- Mos harness collective again5 Veterans of the 1914-1918 war are now very few, survivors or know is not tm e. “W ho attacked Pearl efforts towards Canadians now know little about the wars o f the la« “ nmU and ^ answer bom about a quarter of its sample of 17improving “welfare” Harbour?” the Dominion Institute asked a few years^ C m ^ ^ Korea> with its 1,557 Canadian dead and as opposed to 7 “war­ I to 24-year-olds. How many remember the United Nations p Kashmir to Rwanda? Only the four young soldiers fare”. The real mean­ :Cal T " 11' wounded, or those who suffered and died in peacekeeping, oper*ions f a depend Qn succeeding generations. Should ing o f remembrance L iL c y killed last April near Kandahar are close to 0^ eIJ 0"etSWar yetcrans wbo campaigned for a special day were deeply divided lives on in ,mc the I November 11 promote peace or patriotism. when they had persuaded Ottawa to set aside November 11, hopes o f freedoms and about the merits of war and o f their own sacrifices L h ^ ^ ^ ^ reflecting on Canadas loss o f 61,000 peoopportunities that we that they had fought “the war to end all war was fading. S , P ld event war; others, as passionately, put enjoy as citizens in pie might make the survivors think harder. Some b d « « d ^ “ ^ e d pain and a common question: what might Canada today. their faith in preparedness. What united veterans w t o er “ d how been spared? It’s a fitting Remembrance Day those dead and wounded have contributed to humanity if they had som A n to n ia M a io n i thought for that nursery of human potential, a university.

D e s m o n d M o r to n Director, McGill Hiram Mills Chair in Canadian History Institute for the Study o f Canada

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“Have you forgotten yet?” asked the British war poet Siegfried Sassoon in his poem Aftermath, March 1919: “Look down, and swear by the slain o f the War that you’ll never forget./ .. Do you remember the rats; and the stench/ O f corpses rotting in front o f the front­ line trench — / And dawn coming, dirty-white, and chill with a hopeless rain?/ Do you ever stop and ask, Is it all going to happen again?’” Passionate words; but why should we remember the Great War? The postwar generation devoted considerable energy in build­ ing monuments and inventing solemn ceremonies to ensure that the memory would not fade, that the price paid for enduring freedom would be acknowl­ edged. But historians have long since scotched such moral certainties. The Second World War was pretty unam­ biguously a war for freedom and we can feel comfortable about celebrating it in this light. But the First World War? It is considerably more difficult to adjudi­ cate between those nations that were “right” and those that were “wrong. ” So what should we commemorate? At what stage should the Great War be left to the sedate disagreements o f histori­ ans and students, with little emotional resonance? Or is it already unknown and impossibly remote for the vast majority o f us? If so, is this a good thing— just as, a few decades after the Battle o f Waterloo, the huge upheaval o f the Napoleonic Wars became just a part o f history? Maybe so. But as we hurde towards another reckless and morally dubious war, where economic and strategic self-interests appear to be trumping any o f the usual criteria for a “Just War,” it is no bad thing to pause today and remind ourselves o f the hor­ ror and the pity — and the futility? — o f 1914-1918. In the words o f another British writer, Thomas Hardy, on the November 11th armistice, “There was peace on earth, and silence in the sky;/ Some could, some could not, shake off misery:/ The Sinister Spirit sneered: It had to And “again the Spirit o f Pity - be!’/ -, '— whispered, Why. B r ia n Levi L e w is P h *;, Department fW , Chair, o f History

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M o ' m o n e y , m o ' p r o b l e m s : C a s h i n g in o n c r i m e The Canadian correctional system surrenders to the private sector Patricia Faucher Panthea Lee It costs $66,381 annually to keep a male inmate incarcerated in a Canadian federal penitentiary and $110,473 for their female counter­ parts, according to a recent report by the Correctional Service o f Canada.

Originally belonging to the private sector in their inaugural stages in the 1800s, Canadian cor­ rectional facilities came under gov­ ernment jurisdiction after reports surfaced revealing the inhumane treatment o f prisoners.

Rising costs and overcrowded prisons in recent years, however, have forced the government to search for alternatives in order to lower costs. W ith medical needs, food, education, and other services having been contracted out to pri­ vate corporations within the past 20 years, Parliament is now toying with the idea o f reverting prisons over to the private sector.

Overcrowding has been the major catalyst for the push towards privatization, with approximately 30,000 prisoners in the country and not enough facilities for them.

Prisons in Ontario have seen up to five inmates sharing the same cell.

Globally, the trend seems to be in full force. In 1987, there were 3,100 inmates in private prisons worldwide. The number has risen to 132,000 in just over a decade.

The United States has led the way, accounting for 158 o f the 184 pri­ vate prisons in operation.

Despite the temptation o f the relief o f such a financial burden, Canada has been reluctant to jump on the bandwagon, as the govern­ ment questions why correctional services were handed over to the public sector in the first place.

Canadas first privately-run jail was commissioned by the Harris government o f Ontario. The 1,184bed maximum security prison, Central North Correctional Centre in the town o f Penetanguishene, opened in November 2001. Under close watch by the Ministry o f Correctional Services, its total costs at the end o f its five-year contract will be compared to those o f a sim­ ilar public jail in Ontario, the Central East Correctional Centre located in City o f the Kawartha Lakes.

The government pays compa­ nies to house and guard the prison­ ers, but following Big Business’ assumed aspirations o f profit maxi­ mization and cost minimization, the concern for compromised stan­ dards of inmate treatment inevitably arises.

“Privatization may mean that the profit motive comes into con­ flict with ethical standards, and that would not be good,” asserts

Professor Julian Roberts o f the Criminology Department at the University o f Ottawa. “So the treat­ ment o f prisoners may be compro­ mised, unless the state establishes rigorous standards that are then enforced.”

Compromised standards The main concerns o f the debate are whether efficiency can be

implies that the most important stakeholder should be the citizens, as they are ultimately responsible for the failures o f the justice system, and not to shareholders and people monitoring returns from far away,” notes Deryk Stec o f M cG ill’s Faculty o f Management, who spe­ cializes in Strategy and Organization.

Detractors o f privatization

WWW.APHF.ORG Some fear private prisons may cut corners and jeopardize inmates' rights. upheld without a decrease in the standard o f care provided to inmates, and how accountable cor­ porations will be for their practices.

At the crux o f the ideological dis­ pute is whether the government even has the authority to contract out one o f its public responsibili­ ties.

Approximately 65 to 80 per cent o f the costs in prisons are labour-related, which translates into an incentive for corporations to tackle this area as a hurdle to profit maximization. Corporations may hire non-union guards with inade­ quate training or reduce the staff inmate ratio to cut costs.

Non-union guards command lower wages and receive fewer fringe benefits, but are not required to have past experience in correctional facilities, undergoing training at the prisons instead. Such training has to meet standards dictated by the Correctional Service o f Canada; however, there’s doubt pertaining to the quality o f training the staff receive. If staff are poorly prepared to deal with situations, they are more inclined to use excessive force to control inmates.

Such cost-cutting measures would appease shareholders’ desires for greater profits, but should share­ holders’ interests dictate the organi­ zation and operation o f a prison?

“It is a civic responsibility, but the shareholders that [private pris­ ons] would answer to wouldn’t nec­ essarily be the Canadian citizens.

Ultimately, prisons are about the suspension o f certain rights. This

maintain that public accountability would inevitably suffer, shifting the votes o f power to business execu­ tives and away from the citizens.

“There is no longer any public accountability,” claims François Gaudreau, vice-president o f the U nion o f Solicitor General Employees. “Since private compa­ nies have [profit-making] as their main goal, how long will it be before all semblance o f rehabilita­

to work without adequate winter jackets. There were reports a few weeks ago about a riot at this prison, but again, no one seems to know what went on even though an emergency response team was brought in.”

Changing views o f crime The private sector’s influence o f societal perception o f crime and punishment is also a consideration.

Critics o f privatization fear that cor­ porations will use government lobby groups to influence sentenc­ ing, parole guidelines, corrections budgets and new legislation.

“If there’s an increase in the privatization o f prisons, then what we’ll see is an increase in the num­ ber o f people being sent to prison because [the private sector] will, increasingly, have more control over the justice system ,” observes Professor Pierre Landreville o f the School of Crim inology at l’Université de Montreal.

W hether there w ould be marked attempts to influence poli­ cy, or whether the effects would be mere by-products o f the corporate environment, remains a topic o f debate.

“Almost every organism reacts to whatever provides positive feed­ back. What feeds you and helps you grow, you react to,” observes Stec. If alternate legislation would increase profits, there may be an inclination to support its revision, he explains.

“That element may happen, but it wouldn’t necessarily be the intent or the result o f a direct strategy.”

Increases in the sentence dura­ tion may boost penal populations and corporate profits. A reduction

“ [W ]h a t w e are lo o k in g a t h ere is th e litera l c a p ita liz a tio n o f th is in c r e d ib le sta te p o w e r to r em o v e o n e s lib er ty .”

— Dawn Moore Ph.D. candidate, University o f Toronto’s Centre o f Criminology tion disappears and inmates are simply warehoused?”

There has been speculation that unfair treatment o f prisoners is already occurring at Canada’s guinea-pig private prison and that the government is simply turning a blind eye.

“There are already allegations o f human rights abuses and distur­ bances w ithin [Central North Correctional Centre] which seem to have slipped past the government and the m edia,” notes Dawn Moore, PhD candidate at the University o f Toronto’s Centre o f Criminology and research associate for the Centre for Social Justice.

“Reports indicate that prisoners have been denied access to phone calls from family and sent outside

o f the number o f parole recipients may be advocated so companies w ould have to incur less costs involving new incoming inmates.

Such policy decisions are tradition­ ally heavily influenced by public perception o f crime, and it is feared that private corporations will exploit citizens’ fears for their goals.

“The more people in jail the more money you make. There is no motivation to reduce recidivism or decrease the number o f persons in prison,” argues Gaudreau.

Public duty or private money-maker?

French philosopher M ichel Foucault believed that prisons rep­ resent the entire model o f social control o f industrialized societies.

In Canada, it is widely assumed that the conviction and incarceration o f criminals is a public duty. W ith pri­ vatization, this responsibility is transferred to corporations primari­ ly motivated by profit, from societal institutions chiefly driven by con­ cern for public safety and well­ being.

“Ultimately, the goal o f the justice and prison system would be to put itself out o f business. Ideally, a prison should be so good that it will run itself to the ground,” asserts Stec. “This ideal would appear to be highly incompatible with a business model that requires consistent growth.”

There is concern that corpo­ rate goals would undermine the evolution o f society to an utopian state where crime is minimal and jails are unnecessary, an implicit vision o f the correctional system.

“W hen we allow for the corpo­ rate sector to take a role in carrying out state activities, what we end up doing is not only changing the role o f the state, but also compromising basic democratic principles,” notes Moore.

Would private institutions undermine prisoners’ rights?

Furthermore, can they even be given such authority? Moore believes the penal structure is one that should be strictly guarded by the government, as it is the citizens’ perogative to be protected by an effective correctional system focused on their welfare.

“I think, in many ways, it is even more distressing when we see privatization occurring in the penal system, because really what we are looking at here is the literal capital­ ization o f this incredible state power to remove one’s liberty,” says Moore.

Roberts concurs, contending that a public system is the most effective way to achieve objectivity in the justice system.

“The state is punishing in the name o f the state, and it is the state that should administer the punish­ m ent,” says Roberts.

Justice as a com m odity It is impossible to determine the exact consequences private pris­ ons will have on Canadian society.

A critical evaluation o f the financial savings versus social costs is impera­ tive at this stage, as Canada has yet to declare its stance on the issue.

There are certain institutions that are indispensable in a society, notes Stec, and perhaps their integral roles should thus exempt them from unforgiving cost scrutiny. “[The corrections system] is a public trust, and that’s something that we should be very cautious about before we open up the door. I think that [its privatization] is a See PRISON, page 1}

10

Features The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002

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“The only time I feel badly is when they feel I’m leading them on,” he affirms. “They make me feel bad that I’m not going home with them.”

D o most people believe that dancers are on par with pros­ titutes? Tommy doesn’t think so.

“My parents wouldn’t understand the situation,” he regrets. “They’d be like, ‘Oh God, he’s selling sex for money.’

But that’s totally not true at all. I’m selling the fantasy o f hav­ ing sex with me, but it doesn’t involve sexual acts like the way prostitution does. It’s just a sexualized dance.”

Interesting distinction. Is ejaculation the only aspect of the seductive act that separates the two?

But Tommy has acted sexually. He has stroked his cus­ tomers’ hard penises through their pants, played with their nipples and kissed them without tongue.

“I don’t see what they’re getting out o f it,” he claims.

W hen he lies and tells them he’s 18, they sexily scold, “Oh, you’re just a child,” and he’ll grin and give a throaty “Mmmhmm.”

Doesn’t he feel bad that he’s depicting a barely legal, naive boy? (Did I mention he has a darling bikini wax that makes him look about 12?)

“Yeah, it worries me but [we’re not underage so] it is legal,” he asserts. “I’m capitalizing on an older gay man’s desire to relive a part o f his life he didn’t get to experience when he was growing up. One man I danced for was shaking, he was so old. A lot o f these men had to get married back then and still do. This is as close a pedophile can get without breaking the law.”

Bells and whistles go off in my head. He said the p-word. Tommy, are you encouraging pedophilia?

“They’ll come there to get it out o f their system instead o f breaking the law. N o one’s getting hurt... it’s better for society and it’s consensual,” he told me. Like a steam valve, I guess. This is what happens when a society has an unhealthy fixation with youth.

W ho are these men that pay this naughty little schoolboy to shake his money-maker? From principals to family men, this Tiny Dancer has danced for them all, though he tends to gravitate “towards a man wearing a nice business suit because he just looks like money!”

One man wanted dances, but Phones from as low as $24.99f also wanted to “take [him] out and spoil [him].” Another begged Tommy Let everyone know what you really want. Ask for a to come back to his hotel room with TELU S Mobility phone with 1X capability, the latest him, promising, “I’m a good guy, in wireless technology, and other cool things like: married. I have three kids and I’m a godfather.” Oh yeah, mister, you’re ■ Colour screens such a great, trustworthy guy; that’s ■ Games why you’re paying some young gay boy to wave himself in your face ■ Access to fun downloads like ringtones while your unsuspecting family waits and images’ at home.

It’s easy to look at Tommy and ■ 2-Way Text Messaging capability call him skanky, but who is anybody Available at TELU S Mobility stores, authorized to judge? Perhaps we’re relying too dealers and retailers. To find out more visit heavily on a predetermined moral system. At least the boy has class. telusmobility.com/student or call T888-810-5555.

Other dancers at this club pour wax The future is friendly.® on themselves, while some have inserted fingers into orifices or insert­ ed their members into strangers’ mouths. Yikes.

Maybe we should applaud Tommy for being professional, for using his assets while he still has them mobility™ and for making the most money with the least amount o f hours. H e’s sexy, he’s smart and he’s a cunning litde capitalist. Just think— not only is he ÎT TH EE LEPHONE making money, but now he has end­ m m PU Œ I 1IhE' C om w Æ i w ^ O ffic e d e p o t o&ôsounà Visions FUTURE SHOP BOOTH* less stories to tell his kids someday, when they aspire to be dancers like the S o n y store.

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When I was five, my family decided that I -----flijg ll ■ MIJÊÊ wanted to be a veterinarjmjm Wt J p f l j ian. By the time 1 hit 12, I • m f MB my mother had me con­ vinced that dermatology was the way to go. But by 15, I broke it to dear o f dad that I wanted to be a hooker... with a tamer tide: an escort.

I was under the impression that escorting meant you took wealthy, older people to parties because they had nobody else to go with, and that you received cash and cars in exchange.

My poor father. He tried to deter me from the profession, telling me escorting equalled prostitution. I thought he was clueless; he thought I was a tramp.

Even though Dad had dismissed dancing on a box, at the end o f last semester, I secretly made a pact with my friend Tommy that we would get into great shape and become erotic dancers. I chickened out, but he followed through. Now I blow money on booze and club covers while he rakes in the

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By the end o f his first six nights o f work, including training night, Tommy had made $750. Jealously, I’ve tagged along on his journey and can now share this dancing queen’s story.

Tommy is about six-feet-tall and really good-looking: dark hair, flawless skin, lean, well-defined and well-endowed.

He had a variety o f strip clubs to choose from and decided on one o f the lesser-known, hidden ones in the heart o f Montreal.

He went in determined “to rock [that dub].” And rock it he did. I’ve watched in awe as the boy has repeatedly brought home wages o f up to $300 per night.

Tommy performs several sets a night, each consisting o f one fast song where he dances topless on the main stage, fol­ lowed by a slow song, where he sports socks and a hard-on. At first, I was worried he might become traumatized by the job or go home with a customer, but Tommy assured me he was only playing a role.

“It’s so fake, so ridiculous. I’m not tempted to do any­ thing. It’s almost not even sexual for me,” he explained. “It’s like I’m giving them a big hug for money.”

A big hug? These men could hardly think o f it that way.

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The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002 Features 11

The birds and the bees are getting unhealthy action The number of McGill students engaging in risky sexual behaviour is on the rise Alexandra Dassa The birds and the bees seem like the perfect imagery to describe the fuzzy feelings tied to human attraction. A pretty bird and a fuzzy bee flitting about in the sun­ drenched wildflower fields o f a country estate.

W hen it comes to representing the reality o f human sexuality, how­ ever, the metaphor fails to evoke the misery that unsafe sexual behaviour can entail. I’m talking, o f course, about sexually transmitted diseases.

Nowhere in the song is there any mention o f the bird getting genital herpes from her long time boyfriend, nor do original singers Goebel and Gaynor croon about the bee contracting the human papilloma virus because he was too drunk to put on a condom correct-

are not felt immediately upon con­ traction. Untimely diagnosis and treatment can be disastrous for those sheltering an STD , as certain diseases, if left untreated, can increase the chances o f getting cer­ vical cancer.

Doctors can only guess at the

people and give out more free con­ doms, but our budget would not allow it,” says Bois.

Although students who are old enough to go to university should already be educated about the dan­ gers o f unsafe sex and the necessity o f frequent STD screening, some

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Judging by the increasing number o f McGill undergraduate students requiring medical consul­ tation because o f unsafe sexual practices, they, too, have been singing the censored version o f “The Birds and The Bees”.

According to C indy Bois, M cG ill’s Director o f Health Promotions, and Shelly Robinson, a nurse at McGill Health Services, the number o f students contracting STDs has increased. The human papilloma virus (also known as gen­ ital warts) is on the rise, as are her­ pes simplex and chlamydia.

This trend is one that is being observed province-wide, as the number o f people infected with STD s is rising dramatically in Quebec. A recent study by 400 physicians confirms this prolifera­ tion. Results show that in the last five years, the number o f people infected with chlamydia has increased by a whopping 75 per cent. Women aged 15 to 19 years are especially vulnerable to con­ tracting the disease, as there are 1,400 reported cases per 100,000 women every year.

The rates o f infection o f gon­ orrhoea, herpes and HPV have also been on the rise. Yet, most people don’t even know they have contract­ ed the diseases, as some symptoms

WWW.BIRDSANDBEESINVESTMENTINC.COM McGill students are singing the censored version of “The Birds and the Bees” reasons behind this increase in STD infection. However, most believe that unsafe sexual practices, such as infrequent condom usage, are to blame. The question then becomes, why the sudden distaste for con­ doms in the last five to six years?

There are two possible answers. The first is that Quebec youngsters engaging in their first sexual rela­ tions are not as educated about safe sexual practices as they should be.

The second has to do with the pos­ sibility that people are simply get­ ting fed up with using condoms, as suggested by Health Services Director Dr. Pierre Paul Tellier.

Despite the efforts o f McGill’s health promotions office to expand its safe sex awareness campaign, it has been limited by lack o f funding, which has prohibited the nurses who run the campaign from reach­ ing out to the student population as much as they would like.

“We wish we could hire more

haven’t and most still need to be reminded, according to the Health Services nurses.

“You’d be surprised how many students are still unclear on how to use a condom properly or even the importance o f using one every time they have sex,” says Robinson.

The consequences o f this lack o f awareness are seen every day at the Health Services clinic, where an average o f two cases o f students requiring emergency STD screen­ ings— because a condom was not used or was broken during a recent sexual encounter— are seen daily.

Emergency screenings Mondays are usually the busiest day at the clinic for these screenings.

“This is because o f students’ increased partying on the weekend and subsequent increased ingestion o f alcohol, which decreases a per­ son’s likelihood o f engaging in safe

sex,” explain Bois and Robinson.

Since alcohol impairs judge­ ment and motor skills, someone who has had a few drinks and is about to ‘get jiggy’ will be more likely to either not use a condom, or use it incorrectly. This latter pos­ sibility can be just as dangerous as the former, as it increases the risk o f condom failure.

“Students need to remember that the claim on the label that con­ doms are 99 per cent effective only applies to situations in which they have been used properly,” says Bois.

The nurse suggested that stu­ dents consult the instructions on the condom box and practice at home on vegetables that lend them­ selves to the form o f a condom. She also recommended that students use water-based lubricant, as it can reduce the chances o f the condom breaking, and often makes for a more enjoyable experience.

If emergency screening requests are higher on Mondays, then they are even worse after long weekends. Bois and Robinson say that the general student exodus hom e to see long distance boyfriends/girlfriends is greatly to blame.

“Young people are lulled into engaging in unprotected sex by the illusion o f safety that comes with a relatively long-term relationship,” upholds Bois.

“Although condoms should be used religiously, regardless o f the length o f a relationship, most cou­ ples believe that abandoning con­ dom usage is a sign o f trust in their partner,” shares Robinson.

However, this type o f thinking doesn’t take into consideration the possibility o f catching such diseases from non-sexual activities, nor does it offer any consolation when a partner has an STD acquired from a previous relationship and doesn’t know about it yet.

The change in the size and nature o f McGill’s student popula­ tion is also a factor in the present STD uprising. As the student pop­ ulation gets larger, the potential for the manifestation o f certain diseases increases as well.

W ith the increase in students

accepted to McGill and a decrease in the average age o f McGill fresh­ men, the risk o f infection is multi­ plied. This is due in part to the Ontario Board o f Education deci­ sion to eliminate its last year o f high school (grade 13 or OAC), causing an influx o f 17- and 18-year-olds applying to university.

Still, Robinson was careful not to state that younger students are less educated or responsible when it comes to safe sex. She chose, rather, to emphasize the way in which younger students cope with the newfound freedom university offers: the possibility to partake in daily partying or bring home who­ ever to share the night.

“Younger students might be less likely to set their own limits or respect the guidelines they know are important, like wearing a condom every time they have sex,” states Robinson.

“At this age, sexual health edu­ cation is still important. As students are getting more sexually active, they need to be reminded o f the responsibilities that com e along with their sexual behaviour,” adds Bois.

The health promotions office has responded accordingly, encour­ aging the formation o f the peer-topeer Health Promotions Club, in which fellow students join in the effort to educate and remind their peers o f the importance o f safe sex, along with other health issues.

However, the responsibility to pro­ mote a healthy campus population ultimately lies within each student.

ment must consider the potential infringement o f inmates’ rights before agreeing to the forfeit o f its prisons. By allowing the private sec­ tor to move in on crime and pun­ ishment in society, the distinction between justice for profit’s sake and justice for its own sake has been blurred.

5 - d a y s in - c la s s (o r o n lin e

S h o c k in g S T D s t a t s Gonorrhoea: Has increased by 120 per cent in the past six years.

Herpes: One in five people have it, and most are unaware.

HPV (Genital warts): Three out o f four people have it.

— C F C F 12 News T ra v e l & T e a c h E n g lis h : Jo b s $ $ G u a ra n te e d - G re a t P ay . T E S O L C e rtifie d in

Prison privatization Continued from page 9 dangerous precedent to set,” warns Stec. “There are some fixed costs in society— it costs to have fire depart­ ments and police departments. You can manage them a little and occa­ sionally shake them up, but you’re not going to change [these institu­ tions] that much. There’s no cheap way to have a fire department, and similarly, there’s no cheap way to have a justice department. They’re expensive... and that’s just the bot­ tom line.”

There is a general consensus among citizens that a correctional system is a necessary expense, and a costly one at that. But the issue o f who should foot the bills remains undecided. Although costs are ris­

ing, government can still provide this essential service, but the same guarantee can’t be made by the pri­ vate sector.

“You can’t bankrupt the gov­ ernment, so when things do go wrong, the government can still pay for it,” explains Stec. If the system was private and a prison was deemed unprofitable, what would happen to the inmates?

“We end up paying for it any­ way. If [the private system] makes a mistake, the public ends up pay­ in g... so those savings might not work out in the long term,” he notes.

Russian author Fedor Mikhailovich Dostoevsky once observed, “The true measure o f a

civilization can be found by enter­ ing its prisons.”

As Canada weighs out the pros and cons o f the surrender o f its cor­ rectional system to the private sec­ tor, one cannot help but wonder what consequences would follow for the entire justice system. Can justice be treated as a commodity to be carried out by the highest bidder at the lowest prices? What o f the protection o f the rights o f our citi­ zens? And, should we be unsatisfied with the results o f a privatized sys­ tem, how difficult would it be to escape in a world where govern­ ment services and legislation are being increasingly challenged in international trade tribunals?

“Once you open the door, will you be able to shut it?” asks Stec.

Increased profits do not appear out o f nowhere, and the govern-

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Features The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002

T h e a r t o f n u d i t y : H o w t o f e e l g o o d in t h e b u f f Women need a body-image overhaul to better appreciate their undressed selves Melanie Herscovitch Standing in the w omens show­ er at Currie Gym, I was suddenly inspired. Surrounded by half-naked girls, I thought to myself—what better bunch to talk to about nudi­ ty than the swim team? We shower together, we change together, we are basically nude together.

While the swim team probably has the least qualms about being in the buff, the girls still agreed that nudity continues to be a crucial issue in society. W hile most are practically indifferent to male nakedness, female nudity is undeni­ ably a controversial issue with which Western society continues to struggle.

For the most part, nudity still has a bad rap. People aren’t neces­ sarily expected to keep their clothes on under the sheets, but it’s the associations that are made with being nude that get us sidetracked.

We flick on the tube, and boom— bare skin is popping out like crazy.

Christina Aguilera basically rips off her clothes in her latest music video, “Dirrty”.

Yet, to a certain extent, these celebrities aren’t intentionally trying to act promiscuously. Christina and Britney, though trying to make money and using sex to do so, are presumably proud o f their bodies (fake, real, whatever). It’s the way we automatically label them and scorn them that causes all the com­

they are fairly comfortable with themselves in the nude.

“From my experience, we tend to be a lot more at ease when it comes to being naked. I think it’s just that women are more suscepti­ ble to live up to what society has created for them,” says U1 Political Science student Matt Tontini.

“Men, on the other hand, don’t feel the same pressures to be beautiful. We’re not inundated with the same degree o f sym­ bols and images as compared to women.”

Men’s bodies aren’t being used to sell products and services to the same extent as women’s bodies, because they’re not valued in the same way. And with no label on what men should look like nude, it makes it easy for COSMOPaiS.COkVCHRISTINAAGUILERA.COM them to be bollocknaked in front o f Beauty ideals have changed for women. anyone, anywhere, at any time, as many o f us may have “A good body is just icing on ies. It’s just that women need to oddly experienced at one point in the cake,” says Nat Kehle, a U 2 dress not particularly to impress, our lives.

Environment student. but to outdo and compete with Talk to any girl and she’ll most Without attaching a label to their competitors— other women,” says Kelly Sauvé, a U 2 Education men’s physical appearance, general­ likely say that being nude with a ly, men find it easier to just take it partner doesn’t bother her. But student.

The hunt continues: men are all off. W hen talking with guys compare her feelings about being in about nudity, it becomes clear that the nude to those o f her partner, on the prowl for good-looking

motion. And, who are we to judge?

What woman wouldn’t say that it makes her somewhat content to get a little dressed up, show a little cleavage and to put on a bit o f make-up?

“W om en dress sexually as opposed to men. It’s not that men are uncomfortable with their bod­

women.

“Women on the other hand are looking for mates who can support their offspring,” says Katherine Trajan, a U1 Civil Engineering stu­ dent.

And what qualities does a man possess, enabling him to support a family? Brains. Power. Money.

and you might get a different reac­ tion.

“W hen a couple is naked together, they’re both thinking about the same thing— the woman’s naked body. The woman is self-con­ scious o f what she looks like, while the male is admiring her body,” says Trajan.

And it is this struggle o f being sexy and exposing yourself versus being overly sexual and becoming objectified that puts women every­ where in a difficult position.

“The very consciousness o f their nature must evoke [in women] feelings o f shame,” writes Naomi Wolfe in her book, Promiscuities: The Secret Struggle fo r Womanhood.

“What feels like sexual pride one moment can turn into shame the next,” adds Wolfe, when dis­ cussing how females continue to feel about sexuality and their bod­ ies.

D o we dress provocatively if we’re proud o f ourselves, but risk being labeled a whore? And finally, how can society as a whole get over its preoccupation with female nudi­ ty?

Society needs to relax. The more we focus on the negative aspects o f female nudity and sexual­ ity, or try to deny them completely, the more women feel the need to cover up. Instead, we should try bringing female nudity out in the open to breathe, and then maybe we can move on to more substantial topics.

R e m e m b r a n c e D ay a t M cG ill: S t u d e n t r e f le c tio n s

David Segal U 2 Management

Andrew Duncan U1 Physiology

1 .1 think it’s a great celebration 1. It’s very important to me and perhaps it should be honoured personally. W hat’s good about Remembrance Day is that it’s a per­ more than once a year because we owe a lot to them, these people that sonal thing— you can choose to remember or you can choose not to, died for us.

2. I don’t think it’s been deval­ there’s no one there to tell you what ued too much, but definitely a little to choose.

2. I don’t think it’s been deval­ because we’ve gotten further and ued because it’s not a commercial further from the wars. Today, we holiday and nobody makes money just don’t appreciate it as much off it, which is a nice thing. because the events aren’t as recent.

3. I always get my poppy, and I 3. I don’t do anything special, though I do wear my poppy every always take a look around me just to take everything in. year, proudly.

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welcome to new and returning students

Julia Rys U1 Economics/Poli Sci 1 . 1 think Remembrance Day is about remembering those who died in the war, the consequences o f going to war and how war must be taken very seriously. It’s resulted in so many pointless deaths.

2. Definitely. I think people just keep on forgetting and don’t take it seriously. Where I come from [Edmonton], we usually get the day off school and people just sort o f sleep in, they kind o f just take it as a holiday. And here, we don’t get the day off school and people just treat it as an ordinary day.

3 .1 usually try to go to the cer­ emonies and just take a moment of silence at 11.

Jesse Chandler U3 English 1. I think it’s a really important ceremony in terms o f remembering the war dead and keeping their memories alive.

2. Absolutely. As more veterans pass away, the memories become more distant. Every year there are less people who are left who remem­ ber people who actually died in the wars so I think it’s becoming harder for Canadians, especially younger ones, to fully appreciate it.

3. Normally I try to go back to Toronto to be with my family and my grandparents. Although I don’t think I’ll be able to do that this year, it’s what I try to do every year.

T h e questions:

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1. What are your personal views on Remembrance Day? 2. Do you think the day itself and its signifi­ cance has been devalued over the years?

3. Do you do anything special to observe Remembrance Day?

Christine Armstrong U2 Management Psychology

1 .1 think Remembrance D a good thing because we live in a free country where we can pretty much do whatever we like and it’s because a lot o f people fought to keep us that way. Those people should be respected, especially since a lot o f them are still alive anc maybe don’t live in the best condi­ tions... It’s unfortunate that we don’t treat them as well as we should, considering they fought foi us.

2. Yes and no. Yes, because just for our generation in general, we’re sort o f separated from it. But I güess just within the past year, with the terrorist attacks in the United State! and all the people that died in New York City, people’s awareness, fot lack o f a better word, o f the need tc remember has increased.

3. It’s my birthday, so I go out and party and that’s about it. Bui nothing special, no.

arts&entertainment The M cG ill Trib u n e, Tuesday, N o vem b er

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Dove Konda-Foley____________ T he opening scene o f Opera M cG ill’s production o f D on Quixote was just shorter than the next four scenes com bined, but it felt as though it was twice as long.

It wasn’t that Jonathan Carle’s voice wasn’t excellent— it was— and it wasn’t that Stefan Fehr did­ n’t compare— he did— it was just boring. The entire act consisted o f D on Quixote (Carle) and Sancho Panza (Fehr) talking. T he program explained the scene: Q uixote thinks about how much he loves doing his chivalrous deeds, and Panza mocks him by recounting what exactly the deeds were and how much he would rather just sleep and eat than go on adven­ tures.

N o w im agine taking that description, and acting it out for 25 minutes with just two men, standing in the same places, and singing. Understandably, good opera singers aren’t necessarily good actors, but the performance dragged as a result o f its players’ limited abilities.

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In the next scene,, the shep­ herds, a group o f quaint townspeo­ ple, enter onto the stage. This scene was interesting enough; more people, more action and slightly more em otion, though the m ost interesting part o f this act was G ristom o.

N oticeably, Chantal Scott as the storytelling shepherd is a true talent. They danced around and told the tale o f the wedding that was to take place that day between Quiteria and Comacho, two other townspeople.

Quiteria was promised by her father to Comacho (“the rich”), but is in love with Basilio, who is so devastated by the marriage that he wanders around in the woods calling her name. There is a slight­ ly entertaining m om ent when D o n Q uixote takes extreme offence to the fact that the towns­ people call Q uiteria beautiful, because o f the peasant girl w hom he takes for a princess and with w hom he has fallen in love. H e threatens anyone who dares sug­ gest that his Dulcinea is not the m ost beautiful girl in the world, and chases the men and wom en around the stage.

W hen the bride and groom com e onto the stage the bride— according to the program— is cry­ ing, but it’s not at all obvious when watching the scene. Basilio comes in, bleeding from a dagger wound

get to be married and live happily ever after while the rich Comacho leaves after half-heartedly trying to be angry.

T h e story itself is good enough— the book is a classic—

(the dagger still in his chest) and asks Quiteria to marry him as his dying wish. O f course, as it hap­ pens, he’s not really dying so they

but this section o f the opera is dis­ appointing. The storyline involves too m uch explanation by the singers, and in an opera, dialogue

between many characters is always more interesting, although in this particular performance it would still have been difficult to under­ stand the scene because so little emphasis was put on acting and emotion.

The most obvious flaw was not, however, the acting. It was the choreography, with its uninterest­ ing and repetitive dancing. The dancers seem ed uncom fortable with their steps, but that may have been because no one who is able to dance well would feel comfortable doing those moves.

The one part o f the Opera that shone was the M cG ill Baroque Orchestra. T h ey per­ formed excellently and kept the opera in line for the duration o f the performance.

In general, D on Q uixote sounded good. If one were to listen to it on the radio it w ould be about as interesting as any other college opera. It was the lack o f movement during long, drawn out periods o f m onologue that curbed a perform­ ance w ith otherwise legitim ate potential.

J e w D a t: M C P a u l B a r m a n

W ho s h o t Jam

c a n r o c k t h e m ic r ig h t

M a s te r Jay ?

Continued from page 1 T he night got o ff to an incredibly rough start. The place was filled by no more than 50 peoale, including the bartending staff md the performers on stage.

The openers, T oronto’s Fearless Vampire Killers and Vlichigan’s Whirlwind Heat, vere completely ignored by :he crowd and, sadly enough, in inebriated guy trailing a hece o f toilet paper from his :hoe attracted more atten:ion than the performers.

Jnfortunate, since both ippeared to have at least ;ome kind o f potential.

Vhirlwind Heat, especially, tad the energetic-rockrlives-slash-Vines shtick ;oing for them, that would probably translate well into h e “alternative” rock radio brmat.

However, disregard for everything onstage com ­ pletely transformed when VIC Paul Barman emerged rom the wings. N oticing the :old reception that the openng bands received (as well as he meat locker temperature )f La Sala Rossa), Barman

12, 2002

got onto the stage, and asked the crowd, “Is it cold in here, or is it just me? Let me warm it up!” He proceeded to rip o ff his permanent press long-sleeved polo, and break into what can only be described as

a spastic dancing fit/running man to Noreaga’s “N othin’”. And, if that wasn’t enough to make every­ one crowd around the stage to take a closer look, it was at least a good abdominal workout laughing too hard.

Barman delivered a fair­ ly short, but highly enter­ taining, set, covering some material from It’s Very Stimulating, as well as cover­ ing several new tracks from Paullelujah!. H e did an excel­ lent job o f involving the crowd— at several points in the evening, he invited a guy to rhyme about Confucius, and a girl to flip some bristol board panels à la Bob Dylan w ith selected lyrics from “Cock Mobster” (with lyrics like “I want a smelly slice / o f Kelly Price, plus get with the hairy scar / o f Teri Garr”, it’s im possible not to crack a sm ile).

H igh points?

Basically his whole show was a high point o f hilarity. It seemed as if Raunch-treal could not get enough o f M C Paul Barman.

Thobey Campion The roots o f the thick oak tree that is hip-hop have been torn asunder. Five days ago, Jam Master Jay, a.k.a. Jason Mizell, the famed DJ for Run-DM C lay in a coffin dressed in his leather, white kicks and a top hat, surrounded by thou­ sands, after having been shot in the head on October 30 by one greedy bullet. Unless you’ve spent the last 20 years in Mexico learning the ways o f peyote or have been reading Canadian newspapers, you probadeath. Regardless, he must be remembered.

A peaceful guy who had no continental rivalries or angry pro­ ducers, he was shot “executionstyle”, while playing video games at 7:30 am in his studio. Another per­ son was shot, but the others in the studio remained unharmed. W hy so selective? There are four plausible theories.

T heory #1: T he 50 Cent/Kenneth Walker Theory. In Jay’s later years he had moved away from making music and focused on scouting and producing. Among his connections during this time was a rapper named 50 Cent. 50 Cent is i more trouble than Stalin. His career

has been filled with violence and his songs set out to knock everyone in the business. 50 Cent is now under police surveillance. Furthermore, promoter Kenneth Walker was shot in the head on November 5 while driving through the Bronx.

Kenneth Walker promoted 50 Cent for Jay. The question remains, is this killing spree focused on Jay or 50 Cent?

Theory #2: The Inside Job Theory. There are certain discrep­ ancies- in the report concerning the scene o f the crime. The New York Times says that the men were buzzed up to the studio in Queens, while The Los Angeles Times says the front door had been left open.

Some say that the surveillance was on while others say it had been turned o ff for the evening. Was it an associate who set Jay up? Was Ice Cube promoting a movie or skip­ ping out on Jay’s funeral because he was worried he’d get caught? Does Busta like wearing masks so much that he was willing to kill Jay just as an excuse to put one on? No. Jay didn’t have enemies in the game. If hip-hop’s past were to ejaculate, Jay’s funeral would be the ovum. So cancel the inside job theory.

See LEGEND, page 18

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Unfortunately for this semes­ ter’s mainstage show, there wasn’t much to work with. D ancing at What can be said about the Lughnasa is a boring play. In order current production o f Brian Friel’s to pull it o ff successfully, the Dancing a t Lughnasa at M cGill’s actors and directors must be noth­ own Moyse Hall? W ell... the set ing short o f miracle-workers. The and costumes were good. audience needs to be aware o f all Michael Slack’s excellent set subtleties in the consisted o f script and be cute little house won over by the Dancing at Lughnasa and courtyard strong, loving and authentic relationships looking trees, By Brian Friel between the sis­ providing a beau­ Directed by Myrna Wyatt Selkirk ters. In Dancing tiful visual land­ at Lughnasa, scape. Catherine November 14-16 at 8:00 pm, those elem ents Bradley’s cos­ Moyse Hall, 398-6070 are so hidden tumes did justice between the lines to a beautiful that they have to backdrop, w ith well-balanced be painfully extracted by a very colour and patterns making the dedicated cast and director. The poor Mundy sisters look dignified play doesn’t even follow the nor­ and homeley. These two elements mal literary line o f a story, with really added to the play’s setting, a the usual run o f introduction, ris­ small Irish town called Ballybeg in ing action, climax, denouement the 1930s. and conclusion. Any events, drama The play itself centres around or confrontations between the sis­ five Catholic sisters trying to make ters are reduced to the narrator’s a living alone with an ex-priest m onologues, and never appear brother and a largely absent father. onstage.

Unfortunately, the set and cos­ D ancing a t Lughnasa is noth­ tumes were about all this produc­ ing short o f a character piece, and tion had to offer. A good chunk o f without well-developed characters, the actors had m onotonous into­ there’s not much left. All the sis­ nation, conveyed one-dimensional ters in this production seem exact­ characters and lacked chemistry ly the same, except the slow-mind­ with each other. The Irish accents, ed Rosie and the com edian which are mentioned often in the Maggie. Rosie was played natural­ text and are pretty key to theme ly and delicately by Victoria and setting, were nowhere to be Patrick, who provided a much found. It’s just weird to say: “a wee needed oasis o f performance. slip o f a thing,” without one.

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However, Amy Khoury’s portrayal o f Maggie was so overpronounced and loud, it made Maggie seem like the slow -m inded sister.

Despite a good com ic instinct and a willingness to take risks onstage, the extended amount o f time it took for Khoury to finish a sen­ tence put a dead halt to most o f Maggie’s comic lines.

Friel’s script leaves plenty to the imagination. For example, in the play, the father o f Christina’s son comes home for a visit.

Implicit in the script is the idea that Agnes is in love with him too, a subtlety completely overlooked

by this production, making her sudden crying fit when he leaves com pletely uncalled for. Also, Maren Speck, who plays the eldest sister Kate, seemed to be on the verge o f tears any time she said

anything longer than three sen­ tences. Seeing as Kate is the authoritarian o f the family, this just didn’t make any sense.

N ot to say this play didn’t have its positive points. Evan Placey’s colourful, if a bit flamboy­ ant, portrayal o f Gerry, Christina’s lover, added desperately needed lifeblood to this bland and ailing production. T he fact that you could have picked him up and placed him right down on the set o f Forever Plaid or The Pyjama Game without blinking an eye did­ n’t matter, the audience was just glad for a break in the monotony.

There was one other character besides Rosie that was played with the realism and sensitivity necessary for this show. Father Jack, played by Bryan Walsh, was forgotten from the program’s cast list, but provided the symbolism and comic relief that was almost enough to save this production.

Father Jack is the Mundy girls’ brother, who has returned from spending tim e with lepers in Africa, and has seemingly left his mind, vocab­ ulary and C atholicism there.

Originally from Ireland, Walsh’s downplayed Irish accent was all that would have been required o f the other actors to convince us

they were in Ballybeg, Ireland, and not London, Ontario.

Much o f this show simply lacked credibility. The audience couldn’t help but snicker when Rosie brought in a mangled dead rooster from the barn. Maggie couldn’t stop talking about her W ild W oodbines but surrepti­ tiously managed to forget about them before they ever got lit. And when Gerry Evans would prance onstage looking like he was about to break into song and dance, the contrast between him and the sombre Christina was just ridicu­ lous. The only person who could pull o ff dancing around banging sticks together and still seem seri­ ous was Walsh, who offered up just the right mix o f comedy and pity to make it believable.

In short, this production o f Dancing a t Lughnasa has little to offer. It is about five old maids in small town Ireland, a demographic unlikely to strike much resonance at McGill. Even if you happen to have a particular affinity for small town Ireland and go for that rea­ son alone, you will still be disap­ pointed. The Irish influence is all but ignored except in the script and in the dancing, where it looked out o f context. So aside from your granddaughter being one o f the stars and wanting to stand up and clap for her whether you can hear what she said or not, this play can’t be recommended.

Unless, o f course, you have a thing for set and costumes.

Dashboard Confessional: A one-m an therapy session Dove Konda-Foley W hen Chris Carrabba o f Dashboard Confessional was in his school’s chorus, his stage fright was so intense that he mouthed the words. W hen he began his first song it seemed as though he had­ n’t quite gotten over it; the band behind him was playing strongly, and Carrabba’s voice was hard to focus in on. It was a trick. Midway through the song he burst into the heartfelt cry that has made Dashboard Confessional so popu­ lar as a live group.

A lthough Dashboard C onfessional is technically just Chris Carrabba, he did have a band behind him for the show.

The days o f his acoustic guitar and stool are gone, and the evolution isn’t bad. The band was spectacu­ lar, perfectly matched with one another and bringing a power and uniqueness to songs that could otherwise sound a little too simi­ lar. A keyboard solo halfway through the night was a beautiful­ ly unexpected touch to the per­ formance. Carrabba’s voice is what really brought down the house, and that was not only expected, but what has made him famous.

I went to the show knowing that the em otion o f the songs and the depth to which Carrabba can express them in his performance is what sets Dashboard apart from

m ost em o or singer-songwriter types, but I wasn’t prepared to have it proven beyond a doubt.

During “Saints and Sailors,” he was alm ost screaming, and it would not have been all too sur­ prising to see tears begin to stream down his face as he sang. He did­ n’t let down the purists in the room either; he brought out his acoustic guitar and crooned to all the devoted fans who truly appre­ ciate the soul o f Dashboard Confessional.

And they sang right back to him . T he only thing as wellknown about Dashboard as Chris’ voice is the way the audience responds to it. W hile the band overpowered Carrabba only at the very beginning, the crowd was a different story. O nly during the lesser known songs could I hear clearly, and even then many peo­ ple were singing along with all their hearts. W hen “Screaming Infidelities” began, not a moutb was shut. At one point, near the end o f the song, Carrabba dropped his arm with the mic to his side and just listened.

“Screaming Infidelities” brought with it the only bad point in the whole show, and it had nothing to do w ith the music itself. Just before they began Carrabba said, “this song is on the radio som etim es, sorry about that.” H e’s not sorry. If he were sorry, he wouldn’t have made the

video, or played on M T V Unplugged, or gone on TRL. If he were sorry, he’d play fame along the same lines as NOFX: not releasing their songs to the radio, not making videos. There’s no rea­ son he should be sorry either.

Dashboard Confessional is popu­ lar for a reason, and he should accept the fame if he wants it.

Probably the most unexpect­ ed bend in their road was the song “Tonight I’ll Take W hat I Can G et,” a song about, well, what it sounds like it’s about. It was a very country song, w ith twang and drawl throughout.

Carrabba assured the audience that this is not the route he is thinking o f tak­ ing his music— it’s simply for fun.

And while there is little overlap in the em o and country genres, everyone seem ed to enjoy his musical tangent.

Dashboard C onfessional is honestly one o f those bands every­ one should see live before passing judgment. T he C D s do a fairly good job o f conveying the em o­ tion that truly goes into each song, but no recording can do justice to this band. W ith performances as inspiring as they are, Dashboard could rise to fame in a way similar to the Dave Matthews Band or Phish, just with fewer hippies. The best part about seeing them now is the small venue, which is incredi­ bly important to the ambiance of the show.

The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November12, 2002 A&E17

S i g u r R ô s liv e a n d in f o r m Lauren Consky_______________ Poignant. Unnervingly good.

Chilling. N ot to m ention... incred­ ible.

The Sigur Rôs concert on Hallowe’en night at Metropolis was a sold-out show, and the entire audience was captivated by the raw, expressive sound emanating- from the Icelandic band, which sounds even better live than on their CDs. W hen you experience their live show the music infiltrates you with an eerie, transcendental feeling.

You don’t really seem to notice that you are sitting in a large room with a thousand fans anymore; rather, you are transported to a spot where you are alone, where your mind wanders and ends up in places in your life that you had forgetten about. The music passes through you. You are so into it that you are unaware o f what it is, or where it is coming from; rather, you slip into pensive self-reflection. . Sigur Rôs has the uncanny ability to create an euphoric effect.

The band can best be described as an Icelandic mix o f Bjork and Radiohead, with elements o f avantgarde used to good measure. Their unconventional use o f instruments is akin to 20th Century avant garde composer George Crumb. Make no mistake, they are truly unique.

Jônsi Birgisson, the lead vocal­ ist, sang throughout the two-hourplus concert with his falsetto voice perfectly on pitch. He seemed fully comported into the music, face torn with anguish and an orgasmic look whenever the music built up to full intensity. His fragile voice and w aif figure matched the poignant music and delicate ambiance o f the stage, which was lit with candles and incense. Videos o f amorphous shapes resembling chil­ dren and aliens played behind him.

During their performance o f Track Three from their new album enti­ tled ( ) , lights shimmered across the

stage to create a chilly, calming snow scene. The combined effect o f the visuals, lights, smell and sound created a rapturous atmosphere, which had an almost ecclesiastical purity.

The show’s setlist was mostly a showcase o f songs off their new album, ( ). Their progressive soundscapes were built in two ways: one was in the actual song, where the music was constructed from a min­ imalist melody to a complex, poly­ phonic reverberating fusion o f sound; the other was that each song increased in intensity, leading to cli­ max during the evening’s final song.

It was a wise decision for the band not to do an encore, despite the

ments o f electronica, including reverb for the voice, and an exten­ sive keyboard and synthesizer sec­ tion. A live string quartet also added to the ambience. The drum­ mer’s dynamics were much clearer in concert than on their CD. The instrumentation o f the songs was truly unique; Jonsi’s gui­ tar was played in a frenzied sort o f way with a cello bow. H e snapped a lot o f strings. At one point he also sang into his guitar to achieve a hol­ low echo effect. Georg H olm played his bass intermittendy with a drumstick, and Orri Pall Dyrason used a bow as well to swipe the side o f his cymbol. The best moment occurred at the beginning o f

audience’s standing ovation, because so much energy and emo­ tion had gone into the last song that nothing could have eclipsed it. A sense o f closure also came with the last stringent notes o f the evening; it would have been awkward to reopen the musical discourse.

The impressive sound quality added to the dazzling effect o f the show. Sigur Ros used many ele­

“Svefn-G-Englar” where key­ boardist Kjartan Sveinsson played the first recongnizable notes o f a ringing bell every beat and a half.

These bell notes seemed to suspend indefinitely above the audience members, who were completely enraptured. The consensus among Sigur Ros fans, both new and old, was positive: a “blow-your-mind, amazing concert experience!”

Y ou w a n n a b e a Daniel Chodos Have you ever wanted to demolish a rental car beyond repair?

D o you have an urge to get smashed by a 10-foot tidal wave? Would it warm your heart to get a royal asskicking by a professional fighter who shows as much mercy as a falling anvil? If you answered yes to any o f these questions, but long not to live the rest o f your days with birds permanently tweeting all around your head, this is an oppor­ tunity for you.

Johnny Knoxville, Steve-o, Jason “Wee Man” Acuna and the rest o f M T V ’s Jackass crew have teamed up to give us, the salivating and unrepentant viewing public, the show o f our lives. Albeit, when you leave the theatre, it’s hard to ignore the feeling that everyone in the audience is going straight to hell! After all, have you ever broken into the bathroom and stolen your father’s clothes while he was taking a dump? Well, Bam Margera has!

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Nevertheless, Jackass packs a punch rivaled only by 300-pound wrestler, Butterbean, who took out Knoxville in 18 seconds. For Director Jeff Tremaine and his cast, pain is the name o f the game, and nobody does it better than these guys. Whether it’s administered by each other (consider getting an off­ road tattoo) or incited in angry

Jackass Directed by Jeff Tremaine Starring Johnny Knoxville, Steve-o, Jason “WeeMarf Acuna and Bam Margera Rating ★ ★ ★ out of ★ ★ ★ ★ bystanders (imagine the conse­ quences o f squawking an air horn on a golf course), there is seemingly no limit to the agony and suffering endured by these brave, ambitious, and utterly idiotic young men.

If you are considering seeing Jackass, you must ask yourself a few questions. D o you even want to

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________________________________ Spencer Ross_________________ Sigur Rôs is one o f those bands that you listen to and it’s like watching a David Lynch movie— you finish the C D feeling like you’ve been listening for 20 rather than 72 minutes— a nightmare you can’t quite comprehend but are fascinated by all the same.

If musical comprehension isn’t what you’re looking for, however, then Sigur Rôs makes a spectacular sophomore effort on ( ). Honestly, if avant-gardism isn’t for you, then don’t even look at the cover, because you will be lost from the first note.

First off, an assessment o f the outside o f this C D will be enough to twist your mind. The album title itself, ( ) , is a start. On this second album, the band has decided to take a minimalist approach to not only the music, but the packaging as well. A simple white slip cover with the group’s name is thrown over the C D , which features absolutely no other words other than the band’s website, sigurros.com. There are edited shots o f trees, grass and other natural envi­ ronments, but nothing else.

Follow the C D into your play­ er and you’ve got essentially the same thing: natural landscapes o f sound. Unlike their worldwide debut, Agaetis Byrjun, Sigur Rôs have created a concept album based on basic sound fundamentals and human emotion. The interplay between the listener’s ears and the sounds created are what make this such a sonic masterpiece.

While the band has offered no official tracklisting, there’s been an unofficial one listed on numerous fan sites for a while. From the start

o f this album, there are various themes carried throughout the pieces, although the album is bro­ ken in half by a 36-second silence.

The first half o f the album is filled with lighter songs that breathe an air o f etherealism consistent with previous Sigur Rôs compositions.

The latter half combusts with a darker shade, eventually ending with the heavy drumming in Track bight. 1 he guitar work on ] rack Pour seems reminiscent o f U2 gui«ristT he Edge’s work, toned down a^out. ^ive stePsFundamentally, there is noth*nS to° tom plex within this album, SimPle . chords rcPeat in Patterns just as in any other song. It is the way in which the music is played and sung that adds to the album.

Typical o f Jônsi Birgisson, singer/guitarist for the band, guitar parts are played with cello bows and reverb is abundant.

Birgisson sings somewhat in ‘Hopelandic,’ a cross between an extinct Scandanavian language and gibberish. The reason it works so well is because the lyrics are essen­ tially left open to interpretation by the listeners, whether French, German or English.

What separates this album from its predecessor is rhe level to which the music is raised. I’m not sure if Sigur Rôs intended for ( ) to be a concept album, but it definite­ ly fits the mould. Song differentia­ tion is a little more difficult, but none o f the songs sound the same— son o f like a fractal pattern.

Upon recording this album, Sigur Rôs took to the task o f build­ ing their own recording studio. By creating their desired setting, they were able to capture the effects that best suit this pattern, namely the reverb on the drums as well as the vocals. And while most o f the tracks were lifted off o f live shows, they have evolved into larger pieces. This album is a definite must-have, but be willing to put in the time to listen to it all and not while driving. The perfect winter music.

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visualize the idea o f a man in a PortO-Potty turned upside down? Does a bungee wedgie appeal to you way more than the greatest sexual pleas­ ures? W hy should you subject your­ self to behold this gross misuse o f bodily functions? Three words: it’s freakin’ funny! There’s little more that can be said about it. Jackass is a two-hour, laugh-out-loud, peeyourself-silly thrill ride with more shavings, stunnings, taserings, bitings, cuttings, macings and crashings than your wildest, most absurd dreams. It is a movie that would make even your history prof crack a few smiles.

I strongly recommend this film to anybody with a sense o f humour larger than a toothpick. If laughter is good for your soul, then Socrates would have seen Jackass a dozen times by now. So, next time you have a longing to light a firecracker from your genitals or establish a geriatric fight club, just leave it to the pros. After all, it’s always fun­ nier when it happens to someone else.

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The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002

T h e c h ip o n m y s h o u ld e r

Hester Molester Sometimes people ask me, “Hester Molester, why are you so angry all the time?” and I’ll answer, “Shut the fuck up. M ind your own business.” I’m angry because I am filled with hatred. I hate everything.

I hate people. Sometimes I wish I were the only person alive. Or, at least, that everyone else was me.

I hate men, I hate women; I hate intellectuals (who are usually faking it), I hate stupid people (annoying to listen to); I hate old people (they’re ugly and stupid), I hate babies (too selfish); I hate pret­ ty people (they’re too privileged), I hate ugly people (they’re annoying to look at); I hate my family (they made me), I hate your family (they’re ugly and stupid), etc. If you asked me to make a list o f what I hate and why I hate it, I’d ignore you, because I hate you, but the list is actually quite long and detailed, and constandy growing with excit­ ing new hate-filled adventures. I wrote it out in my diary, next to my tears.

©KUT k

A nnual G eneral M eeting

W hy I Hate Men -They check out your goods and don’t care that you know they’re doing it.

-They think that if you’re a girl, you automatically care about them and their feelings and want to hear their pathetic sob stories.

-They’ll ditch you for a guy.

-They’re too busy thinking about themselves to realize what selfish misogynists they really are.

W hy I Hate Women -They check out your goods and think you won’t care because they’re girls.

-They’ll ditch you for a guy.

-They compete with you for oblivi­ ous moron losers who don’t care or notice anyway.

-They’re too busy hating other wom en to realize what selfish misogynists they really are.

-They act like your mom when you want a friend.

Actually, now that I think about it, I hate men more than I hate women. Here are some more reasons why I hate men.

W hy I Hate Men continued -They get turned on when you tell them that you hate them.

-If you’re lucky, they want you to act like their moms, if not, they try to be your dad. Either way, its bull­ shit.

-They’re arrogant and act like they own you and think that the world revolves around them.

-They pretend like they’re really horny because they see guys like that on TV. But when it comes

All CKUT volunteers & members are requested to attend.

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Continued from page 15

Theory #3: T he N o Job Theory. Biggie, Tupac, Easy E, Jay and I are all chilling in my room right now, applauding the perpetu­ ated myths o f this article over some nice warm tea and an episode o f

her here. He owed $100,000 to the state and $226,000 in federal taxes.

An associate o f Jay’s received a phone call from Georgia on October 25, warning him that men were com ing to collect money.

Scoon had moved out o f Hollis but his mail still arrived at his house.

JONATHONMANNI0N R.I.P. Jam Master Jay, one of hip hop’s founding fathers Carmen Sandiego.

Theory #4: The Curtis Scoon Theory. Scoon is a man Jay grew up with in Hollis, Queens. Jay had owed Scoon a sum o f money for years now. Apparently, Scoon is not angry over a quarter he lent Jay for an electronic pony ride. Jay’s money problems are important to remem-

N o one knew how Scoon made his money. The situation is sketchy but this theory seems to be the most promising.

Whatever the motives, Jay should be remembered. So throw on a tune, smoke a Jay and realize that the Jam Master was a legend.

T h e re m ix r e tu r n s , r e c o r d s b y m a il

Wednesday, November 2 0 th.

2 0 0 2 at 6 pm Thom pson House 3 6 5 0 McTavish St.

^ -S tu d e n ts c la s s a ir fa r e s

down to it, they’re lying, and their genitals are inferior anyway.

Actually, I hate women and men equally as much, but a woman didn’t dump me last weekend.

But what about the children?

Children are so simpleminded and weak. What harm can they do?

Everyday that we live, thou­ sands o f poor children die. There are starving children who live like rats in poverty, in horrible condi­ tions, dying everywhere, everyday. I hate them, too. Third World coun­ tries suck anyway. If these kids grow up, they’ll just become assholes, impregnate some poor illiterate 12year-old girls, and make more bratty street kids... which brings me back to why I hate men and every­ thing else.

So I hate people. It’s what I do.

It’s how I make it through the day.

I don’t know how I’d live if I didn’t have a bottomless pit o f black rage eternally burning in my heart. The flames o f hatred keep me warm during the cold winter’s night that is everyone else. My best friend, besides my hatred, is my plant, since my cat died and my fish ran away; nothing has ever understood me so well. Grow on, spiny cactus.

Email us at info@redherring.hm if you want to get on our hate list, or our mailing list. Our first issue o f the year came out last week, so you should go and get it. Don’t be the only one with­ out a copy o f Red H erring M agazine! Everyone will think you’re such a loser!

Legend dies young

3 4 8 0 M cT a v ish 3 9 8 - 0 6 4 7 2 0 8 5 U n io n b u r : L -8 2 8 4 - 1 3 6 8 w w w .v o y a g e s c a m p u s .c o m

I’m so sick o f people telling me how they have “so much work to do” in their most stern, this-timeI’m-being-serious, voice. It reminds me o f when I used to work at a gro­ cery store and people would tell me not to put the bread in with the 2litre botdes o f pop. I was like “yeah, I work at a grocery store.” Fuck.

Anyways, here are some musical pastimes to distract one’s self with.

B ir th d a y to M e 7 ” S in g le s C lu b

H appy

For $55 (US), Happy Happy Birthday to Me records sends you one 7 ” record every month for a year. Unfortunately, you missed the boat, but now you can just order the whole whack at once, getting you a fistful o f simple indie-pop and bed­ room-pop experimentalism.

The monthlies range from such well established bands as Essex Green, O f Montreal and Masters o f the Hemisphere to many lesser known acts, a few out o f the H H BTM headquarters o f Panama City, Florida. The disks all come in home-made sleeves.

Children coloured all 500 o f Marshmallow Coast’s record sleeves while O f Montreal silk-screened machine sewed pouches out o f fabric samples to adorn the wonderful music that is provided inside.

Kingsauce, who, despite their terrible name, have recently released a full length also on H H B TM

records, provide some remarkable 60s-esque hurdy gurdy pop. Plastic Mastery covers some well orches­ trated folk tunes with friendly horns, quick violins and a shuffling rhythm section, topped with bril­ liant lyrics. O f Montreal plays one o f their more accessible tunes remi­ niscent o f the perfect combination o f the Zombies and Pet Sounds-era Beach Boys songwriting (no joke!).

A real change-up is provided by the Black Swan Network’s heavily digi­ tally-edited bedroom-pop songs, adding glitch to dream-like ballads.

If you would rather get into a new singles club there are a few starting tip now or soon. Twisted Nerve (Badly Drawn Boy, Alfie) offers 12 singles for 70 British pounds while Dark Beloved Cloud offers a 3” CD single club for the price o f free! All you have to do is send them enough three-inch pieces o f cardboard, which they will fash­ ion into homemade covers while providing you with a sample o f music each month.

P h y s ic a l R e m ix e s

Hand-remixed music is mostly dreadful to listen to and usually boring to make. Back in the early days o f musique concrete, to ‘re­ mix’ a sound you had to cut and paste it together with more than just a keyboard shortcut. Tape splicing and vinyl cutting are a bit like long division o f polynomials— nobody really likes doing it and most people

just don’t remember how to do it anymore.

The physical remix— or the demix— surpasses both those ele­ ments with a no holds barred set of rules that encourage the innovative and the absurd. Several different tactics are usually taken. The most obvious is the active physical remix, where the surface o f the record is scratched and cut, while surface material is added, like tape, paint or glue. Finally, sectors o f the record are eliminated and replaced with other records; the list goes on and

Some prefer to demix passively.

Perhaps you may leave the record under your doormat or in the bot­ tom o f a lake. You may bake it into a pie only to extract it later to hear the cool and delicious result.

Then, o f course, there is the conceptual remix (replacing the record with a whole other one, oi destroying the record because you hate remix— be as clever as you want). Despite your technique, this demix is also very visual and some thought may be put into its final physical appearance.

At the end o f the day, physical remixing is fun, easy and takes very little time. The end results are always different and although it may not sound wonderful, your cre­ ative pride will tell you otherwise and it will probably look cool hung on your wall. I highly recommend this musical and artistic activity.

T h e M c G ill T rib u n e , T u e sd a y, Novem ber 12, 2 0 0 2

QIFC FINAL

REDMEN 10, STINGERS 6

B rin g o n t h e P r a i r i e D o g s f r o m S a s k a t c h e w a n Catherine Kramarczuk W ide receiver Khan Ngyuen lad it right when asked o f his pre­ conceptions before the game.

“We are super excited and very prepared for the hard and competi­ tive battle. This is our true test o f the year because Concordia is a hard-hitting and aggressive team: look for the defence to rule the game,” said Ngyuen.

Ngyuen’s prediction came true, as a large crowd at Molson Stadium was treated to a conservative battle.

In the end, No. 3 McGill Redmen hung on to defeat No. 7 Concordia Stingers 10-6. The McGill defence barely outshone Concordia, forcing three fumbles and intercepting Concordias Jon Bond three times on the gorgeous day, complete with impeccable blue skies and warm weather.

Even though this year’s McGill team was the highest scoring ever in the history o f the franchise, the offence came up short throughout the entire game. The match began with McGill taking an early lead that would end up being the only touchdown o f the game.

M cGill quarterback Josh Sommerfeldt hit wide receiver Alex Martin for an 85-yard bomb touch­ down pass 4:25 into the first quar. Kicker Anand Pillai put through the extra point to make the score 7-0.

Pillai kicked an 11 -yard field ;oal soon after to give McGill three more points. That was it for McGill coring, as the game then became ibout field position and defensive prowess, every punt return leaving :ach team deep in its own territory.

Upon reflection after the game, :ailback Danny Tai admitted that :he offensive unit needs to support ts defensive comrades more in such :ritical matches.

“The offence played really sadly and we need to step it up for :he next game. The defence practi­ cally won this one for us,” Tai said.

Early in the second quarter, Concordia put points on the board with a 38-yard field goal, making he score 10-3 for McGill. The defensive battle became intense in he second frame, as each team was hrowing huge defensive plays at each other.

In the middle o f the quarter, McGill put pressure on Bond, causng him to fumble the ball. Bond ecovered for a loss o f 13 yards.

3ond was then sacked by linebacker Andrew Garvin for a loss o f six ore yards. As the ball switched lands to M cGill, the Stinger defence made sure the defensive ntensity was equal on both sides.

Concordia forced a sommerfeldt fumble, but McGill was able to recover. The next play nanifested in a quarterback sack for

a loss o f 16 yards. The respective defensive units fought until the end, responding to each other.

Defensive safety and team cap­ tain Andrew Cook commented on the play between defences.

“It really turned into a defen­

most important game o f the year, to date.

“We have had a good defence all year with great defensive coaches and players that make big plays,” said Zenone. “We are missing the heart and soul o f our defence

brought a sigh o f relief to McGill fans as he kept the Stingers pinned down field. The game looked to be sealed for McGill, but there was one more scare.

Bond threw a huge pass that most likely would have been a

could not get through McGill’s rock solid defence.

As emotions ran high on the field after the game, linebacker Colwell commented on his team’s success and cohesiveness.

“It is a team game with 12 guys

NATHANLEBIODA McGill running back Nick Hoffman goes over top of Concordia tackier Dave Aiken. Hoffman will be looking to lead the Redmen over the Huskies Saturday. sive battle. We picked it up as a team as it got hectic sometimes, but we came together as a unit.”

McGill’s offence was messy at the end o f the first half. The Redmen could not score any points after a pivotal Concordia turnover.

The offence failed to move the ball forward and kicker Pillai missed a 20-yard field goal kick that could have brought the Redmen to a 10point lead.

After halftime, the game became even more intense as Concordia scored a field goal that cut M cGill’s lead to only four points.

Hopes o f a Red and W hite touchdown reached a zenith as line­ backer Mike Zenone forced a Stinger fumble that was recovered

by McGill.

The Concordia defence did not allow McGill to capitalize on' Zenone’s contribution. McGill also suffered from a costly penalty that kept the team out o f field goal range. Zenone noted that the Redmen defence stepped up in the

though with [Mike] Mahoney out, but we were able to pull it off any­ way. Mike is irreplaceable but [Stephen] Colwell (who stepped in for him) did a great job.”

W ith the teams neck and neck, a late fourth quarter punt by Pillai, who, without usual long snapper Mahoney in the lineup, was scoop­ ing balls o ff the turf all afternoon,

GAME

touchdown for the Stingers if the ball had been only one inch closer to the receiver. This bit o f lastminute luck allowed the Redmen to pull o ff the victory.

Statistically, the game should have gone to the Stingers, as they bested the Redmen in first downs (20-13) and total net yards (324267), but the Concordia offence

The Brothers Martin DB Frederick Martin and W R Alex Martin

In a game o f turnovers and fumbles, F. Martin managed to grab two interceptions. The first came off the Stingers opening drive in the first quarter at the 15-yard-line. Five plays later, his older brother Alex scored the T D that proved to be the margin o f victory. The second interception by F. Martin came on a 54-yard pass from Concordia QB John Bond at the 23-yard-line. This crucial turnover in the fourth quar­ ter allowed the McGill offence to move the ball away from their own end and save the game by not allowing the Stingers to score a touch­ down.

that want to play and 12 guys that play the best they can,” Colwell said. “We played the only way ’ knew how and that is hard i / guys, all for one and one for all. We are going to win everything.”

McGill coach Chuck McMann was proud o f his team.

“I knew it would be a tough defensive battle, but I didn’t expect it to be 10-6,” McMann said. “That was a real shock, but the guys hung in as a team and never got down on each other, while maintaining a great spirit.”

A confident safety, Cook is determined to win a National Championship. “We will prove to this country that we are an amazing team. Everyone will know it in the end.”

The Redmen host the Mitchell Bowl this Saturday against the University of Saskatchewan Huskies. The winner heads to the Vanier Cup, held November 23 in Toronto.

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Sports

Tuesday, November 12, 2002

The McGill Tribune,

QIFC AWARDS

M a h o n e y a n d M c M a n n r e c e i v e Q IFC h o n o u r s Mark Kerr Redmen linebacker Mike M ahoney was named this year’s Quebec Interuniversity Football Conference’s m ost outstanding defensive player. T he native o f Regina, Saskatchewan, is also one o f four finalists for the Presidents’ Trophy, which is awarded to the nation’s best defensive player. The trophy will be awarded Vanier Cup weekend (November 20-23).

Chuck M cM ann received QIFC coach o f the year honours in the ceremony held at Tomlinson Hall last Tuesday. McMann, who was also named the QIFC’s top coach last year, is Quebec’s nomina­ tion for the Frank Tindall trophy for head coach o f the year in Canadian Interuniversity Sport football.

Mahoney, who had 41 tackles in eight games, received high praise from his coach.

“Mike has been great the four years he has played at M cGill,” McMann said. “Mike is like having an extra coach on the field. A co­ captain who makes all defensive calls, he has tremendous feel for the ebb and flow o f the game.”

M ahoney played all eight

NATHANLEBIODA McGill head coach Chuck McMann presents Mike Mahoney with his award. games this year, but sat out the semi­ final game against Bishop’s as well as last Saturday’s final with an injury.

Over his four-year career, Mahoney has recorded 163 tackles (117 solo, 92 assisted). Seven o f the tackles have been for a loss, and he also has three quarterback sacks to his credit.

McMann has been named the

QIFC’s top coach in his first two years at McGill. Under his guidance,

Year 1999 2000 2001 2002 Totals:

GP 8 7 8 8 31

the Redmen have a record o f 15-4.

McMann has proved to be a superb replacement for Charlie Baillie, who stepped down after 29 years o f coaching the Redmen. Baillie was last honoured as coach o f the year in 1993.

“Chuck has done a great job with the team, and the program, the past two years,” M cGill athletic director Robert Dubeau praised in his introduction.

“It is a great honour,” McMann said in accepting the award. “As the other coaches know, maybe the media doesn’t know, the whole coach staff and organization deserves praise. The players have bought in to what we are doing, and credit goes to them.”

McGill has enjoyed a stellar year. After losing the first game o f the season to Laval, the Redmen are currently riding a nine-game win­ ning streak. The 2002 team is the highest scoring team in McGill his­ C a r e e r S t a t s M ike M a h o n e y Tackles Jl 1 solos, 3 assisted; 12.5 (17 solos, 31 assisted; 32.5 77.0 (57 solos, 40 assisted; 41.0 (32 solos, 18 assisted;

tory, with 229 points in eight regu­ lar season games. McMann, an assis­ tant coach with the Calgary Stampeders for nine years, led McGill to its first regular season division title in 2 l years.

Laval big winner overall In other award news, Laval quarterback Mathieu Bertrand is up for the H ec Crighton trophy after being named the QIFC’s most out­ standing player.

Bertrand’s teammate François Boulianne was named most out­ standing lineman. Laval offensive lineman D om inic Picard took home the Peter Gorman trophy nomina­ tion for rookie o f the year.

Concordia safety Dave Aiken was recognized as the player who best combines athletics with aca­ demics and community service.

See the T ribune’s newest colum nist M ike M ahoney’s first entry on the opposite page.

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sacks, sacks, sacks, sacks,

1 for loss) 5 for loss) 1 for loss) 0 for loss)

117 solos, 92 assisted; 3 QB sacks, 7 for loss

CIS CHAMPIONSHIPS CROSS-COUNTRY

Ali-Khan fifth, top Redman drops out of race Sarah Wright For McGill’s cross-country coaches and runners, the national final in London, Ontario was not what they wanted or expected.

“With any sport, it can be bitter­ sweet,” head coach Dennis Barrett said. “We expected a top-five finish (for the women].”

The Martlets placed in the mid­ dle o f the pack, eighth out o f 14 teams. McGill had two top-seven fin­ ishes. Sarah Ali-Khan and Nicole Portley finished fifth and sixth respec­ tively, good enough for both of them to earn first-team all-Canadian status.

Daniel Wernerssen, the top male runner for McGill throughout the season, began the race with a bad case

o f the flu and, unfortunately, had to drop out before reaching the finish line.

“Our top guy [Wernerssen] was sick as a dog the whole week,” said Barrett. “His heartbeat was at 70 beats per minute that morning, where it is usually around 40 bpm. He gave me the nod during the race and said he just couldn’t run anymore.”

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O u r fe e c o v e rs : I p re - p r o c e d u r e e x a m in a tio n s , la s e r tr e a tm e n t a n d fo llo w -u p .

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Brant Carson wore the first McGill bib to cross the finish line, placing 37th in the 10-kilometre race with a time o f 34:11. Ben Brisbois (44), Greg Campbell (60), Doug Hayami (67), rookie Jeff McCabe (69) and rookie Marty Fox (86) were the other McGill runners to finish the race. The winning time was 31:05, recorded by Jamie Epp o f the Saskatchewan Huskies.

As a team, the men finished 11th out o f 14 teams with a total o f 251 points.

Surprise finish from Portley The big news o f the day was Portley. She finished in sixth place with a time o f 18:14 in the five-km race, just under a minute off the firstplace time o f 17:20 posted by Sarah Dillabaugh o f Ottawa.

“Nicole’s placing was a pleasant surprise,” said Barrett. “She finished 14th last year, so her top-10 finish was a big plus for us.”

Portley crossed the line just six seconds after teammate Ali-Khan, who was hoping to finish in the top three.

“Sarah said she didn’t feel good on the day,” said Barrett o f Ali-Khan, who finished second nationally last year.

Rookie Katy Semcow was the third McGill runner to cross the line in 66th, followed by Jessalyn O ’Donnell (71), Leslie Marcotte (79), Laura Wilson (104) and rookie Anna Potapov (105).

The women’s field has been extremely competitive this season, with no real standout team.

“It was a wide open race and the field was quite evenly spread,” assert­ ed Barrett. “On paper and perform­ ance, Toronto seemed to have the

NATHANLEBIODA A McGill runner in action this year. strongest team. But any team could do well if they showed up and ran really well. “[In order for us to improve] we just need to bunch our team more,” said Barrett o f the race strategy the team will work on next year.

For next season, Barrett knows he will see good things from rookies Semcow, O ’Donnell and Alicia Larsen, who just missed the CIS qual­ ifying time. As for the men, Barrett was equally positive for his team’s prospects.

“Jeff McCabe and Marty Fox, I think, have the type o f attitude we re looking for, and they should really step up next season,” Barrett added.

“They all just need a little more time to run at this level and some more experience, and we should see some great results [next year].”

r The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002

CIS CHAMPIONSHIP SOCCER

REDM EN 3 , VARSITY RLUES

O v e r a c h ie v in g

A R O U N D T H E HO R N

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t e a m

P A T R IC K F O K

Fabio Scappaticci goes down to protect his wing in Ottawa this past weekend.

from chronic hamstring troubles.

“It isn’t the colour we wanted, but at least we were able to bring home a bit of hardware,” said Harding of his team’s bronze medal.

The St-Lambert native ended his Redmen career in style Sunday, earn­ ing Most Valuable Player distinction in the game.

A well-timed and much needed win McGill arrived at Sunday’s bronze medal game after having lost its tournament opener 1-0 to the University of Prince Edward Island.

The next day, the Redmen defeated Carleton, the No. 1 ranked team in the nation, by a 1-0 score. Rookie Jonathan Warin scored McGill’s lone goal, once more assisted by Harding.

Despite upsetting the topranked team, the Redmen were disap­ pointed to come home as the third place team.

“We thought this year was going

Swim team hosts dual meet against Dalhousie

b r o n z e d

Ed G liicksm an

A solid 3-0 victory on Sunday over the University of Toronto Varsity Blues enabled the Redmen soccer team to finish third overall at the Canadian Interuniversity Sport Championships hosted by Carleton University.

Rookie Fernando Daluiso and veteran Philippe Lazure scored McGill’s second half goals. McGill’s third tally was the result of a late Toronto own-goal.

Brock won the national title, beating the host Ravens 1-0 in the final after a dramatic overtime finish.

Playing in his third National Championship tournament in five years, the 23-year-old Lazure scored in what was his last game in a McGill uniform.

The goal was assisted by team co-captain Mathieu Harding, who also arrived at the end of a fruitful Redmen career on Sunday.

“The ball came to my foot and I buried it,” described Lazure of his goal. “It is great to finish off our tour­ nament with the bronze medal. This season certainly has been memorable, definitely something that we are all very proud of.”

Teammate Gino Lalli, a six-year veteran, echoed Lazure “We were determined to get at least a bronze medal this weekend since McGill usually struggles in the third-place match-up.”

Despite a seemingly endless uni­ versity career, Lalli will return one last time next fall for a chance to win his second national tide since being a member of the first-place team in 1998. The Ile-Bizard native has been a solid, reliable presence on defence for the Redmen, since recovering

Sports 21

to be ours, but I guess it wasn’t meant to be. Our performance this season, especially from the younger genera­ tion of players, shows that this uni­ versity will remain a contender for years to come,” predicted co-captain Harding.

The Redmen rookie crop has been especially potent this season, led

by Alex Scott, Dalusio, Warin and Tomas Miranda.

“It really feels great to get the bronze here after losing on opening day. I think that with our squad we may have championship potential for at least another five years,” said Daluiso. “It’s been a great time, a great time. Hats off to all the guys.”

The old and the new The victory against Toronto marked the end of a successful season for head coach Adam Mar’s Redmen.

After having won the Quebec Student Sports Federation champi­ onship for the 17th time, McGill

ended up with two wins and a loss at Nationals, conceding just a single goal over the weekend.

Management major Alex Scott topped off a formidable list of Redmen to win personal awards, both on the provincial and the National levels. The 19-year-old mid­ fielder won CIS and QSSF rookie of the year awards and was one of the two Redmen elected to the QSSF first all-star team.

Second-year Montreal native Derek Tsang was named to both the QSSF and CIS tournament all-star teams. The solid defender also earned a spot on the CIS all-Canadian sec­ ond team.

Lazure and midfielder Jeremy Lawson were voted to the QSSF sec­ ond all-star team.

This fall’s medal finish bolstered McGill’s reputation as a leading Canadian soccer university. After their 33rd game last Sunday, the Redmen have played the most total CIS tournament games in history and have won gold on three occasions, in 1981, 1982 and 1998. Their overall CIS tournament record since the league’s founding in 1972 is 11-18-4.

The Redmen capped off what was certainly a season of improve­ ment compared to their QSSF semi­ final knockout in the 2001 cam­ paign. Mar’s team was well-balanced and especially better at the front where McGill has struggled in recent years.

— With files from Kate Rhodes Ed Gliicksman has reported on every clever pass and useful through ball, rain or shine, in the lastfour years.

The Tribune sports section salutes his dedication.

Martlet swim team captain Carolyn McCabe swam two win­ ning races on Saturday in the 50metre freestyle in a time o f 27.58 and the 50-m fly in 29.86 seconds.

Janice Tijssen also won gold in the 100-m freestyle in a time of 1:00.25- The Martlets amassed 136 points against Dalhousie.

Despite the season still being young, eight women have already swam qualifying times for the CIS championships.

On the men’s side, the Redmen out-swam the competi­ tion, winning 155-138. Captain David Allard won the 200-m indi­ vidual medley, backstroke and breaststroke. Other first-place fin­ ishes came from Ryan Tomicic in the 50-m freestyle and the 100-m freestyle, Sylvain lem ieux in the 800-m freestyle and the 400-m freestyle and Doug McCarthy in the 50-m backstroke and the 50-m flystroke.

Alexandre Pichette, Allard, McCarthy and Tomicic have all swam qualifying times for the CIS championship.

Shooting frenzy in Redmen hockey

The Redmen hockey team played two games on the road last weekend and came home with a split decision, losing to the University o f Toronto 3-2 Friday and beating Ryerson 5-2 Saturday.

In Friday’s game versus the Varsity Blues, McGill was consid­ erably stronger offensively, outshooting Toronto 39-23, but was denied numerous times by the opposing goalie. It was a tie game until the seven minute mark o f the third period, when Toronto got the go-ahead goal. Daniel Jacob and See AROUND THE HORN, page 22

T h e C h a m p o f C h a m p s : N a c h o s , m u lle ts a n d h o n d o s

Mike M ahoney

As I made the three-block trek from my apartment to Champs Sports Bar, I had no idea what I was getting myself into. It was an unusu­ ally balmy Sunday afternoon, consid­ ering October had already begun.

Beer, nachos, rowdy fans, mullets, degenerate gamblers and conversa­ tions about divorce were some of the goods in store for this wide-eyed arairie boy.

Since this is the first column I lave written for this fine student pubication, I think I should start by casudly introducing myself. I am a 21year-old lad hailing from Regina,

Saskatchewan. Born in the middle of the Prairies, you would figure “hockey guy,” but contrary to popular stereotypes, my passion lies with football. I have lived in the bustling metropolis of Montreal for the past four years, studying commerce and playing football. My team, the storied Pittsburgh Steelers, was the reason I found myself in this recent predica­ ment.

I arrived at the bar expecting to quietly take a seat, enjoy some food, nurse my hangover and watch my Steelers dispose of the New Orleans Saints. My seatbelt was promptly buckled and I was driven through a sub-culture unlike any other I have ever witnessed.

My first chore was to find an actual seat among the maze of bar tables and bar hounds. Champs show­ cases every National Football League game played on a vast array of televi­ sions of all shapes and sizes.

I quickly scanned the numerous televisions on both sides of the bar, locating my beloved Steelers. I glanced over the crowd to find not a single seat open on the floor. I pro­ ceeded to turn to the bar where I was introduced to a short, stocky man named Brian, one of the aforemen­ tioned degenerate gamblers. Brian

was sporting a 70s style coif of hair and a push-broom moustache for the ages. The first words I heard out of his mouth were “F#%&, there goes 400!”

After witnessing this man’s dis­ turbing appearance and hearing his first words, I was somewhat reluctant to speak with him, but I figured I should try to fit in early.

“Anybody sitting here?” was my dull first attempt to speak. This was met with a sharp glance and a reply of “no.” At this point, I was debating telling Brian that Tom Selleck called and wanted his moustache back, but I decided against it. I proceeded to nes­ tle up to the bar and order some nachos and an iced tea. Brian eventu­ ally warmed up to me, and I quickly learned the poor sap was down close to a grand on the day.

Already in a state of disbelief at the scene unfolding before me, a roar erupted throughout the bar as a Buffalo Bills touchdown was met with a raucous celebration by some gentle­ men showcasing Bills’ jerseys. It swift­ ly became apparent that these hondos were already half-in-the-bag when the table they were sitting at was knocked over, spilling beer in all directions.

Hondo: Noun. Slang. Someone of lower intelligence with a backward

notion of common sense.

My next adventure began when a seat directly to my right opened up and a chatty man from Hamilton secured his place at the bar. Within 10 minutes, I knew this guy’s life story, including details of his recent divorce and the massive amount of child sup­ port he forks over every month to “the bitch,” as his ex-wife was affectionate­ ly referred to. Pete, his name as I later learned, was trying to figure out whether his bookie gave him two or three points on the Saints, who were comfortably disposing of my Steelers.

By this point, I had consumed a plate of nachos, an iced tea, six glass­ es of water and half a pint of Guinness. Brian, who had been standing the entire afternoon, had gone through eight cups of coffee, damn near a pack of cigarettes and looked like he was going to have either an emotional breakdown or a cardiac arrest. Pete had downed four Molson Exports and half a pack of cigs, and his mullet-covered head was drooped over the bar with a look of exhaustion on his face.

Mullet: Noun.

Slang.

Controversial style of haircut consist­ ing of short hair on the top and sides

of the head with a proportionately longer length of hair being worn in the rear.

Also known as the ‘Tennessee Neck Blanket,’ ‘Business on Top, Party at the Back,’ or more commonly, ‘Hockey Hair.’ French translation: ‘coupe Longueuil.’

By this point in the afternoon, my Steelers had faltered and I figured I should cut my losses short. After wishing my new buddies good luck in their future endeavours and squaring up the bill, I strolled down the stair­ case towards the exit to the sound of an uproar due to an Oakland Raiders touchdown.

Walking home and pondering the mysteries of this unusual place, I evaluated the events of the day. I met some different people, watched a quality football game (the Steelers came back and made it close), re­ hydrated my wilting body and enjoyed some excellent entertain­ ment. Will I go back? You can bet your tuition on it.

Mike Mahoney, when not slum­ ming it at Champs, plays middle line­ backer for the McGill Redmen football team.

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11 Sports

^ HOCKEY

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The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002

GEE-GEES 5 r M ARTLETS

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lo s e s

fir s t

Jam es Scarfone

The McGill Martlets returned from a successful Southern Ontario road trip with loads of confidence.

Backed by Olympic gold-medalist goaltender Kim St-Pierre, the team has outscored its opponents by a 434 margin this season. However, 23 minutes into Sunday’s game, the Martlets total goals against was dou­ bled, reaching eight, and the Ottawa Gee-Gees (4-2-0) went on to win the game 5-2 at McConnell Arena.

The Martlets may have been complacent coming into this game on a nine-game unbeaten streak, but the players were offering up no excus­ es for their poor play in front of a mostly Ottawa-biased crowd.

“We just had no composure out there,” said second-year forward Katherine Safka.

“That was not a top perform­ ance by far,” said a disappointed McGill head coach Peter Smith.

“Our heads weren’t in this one from the beginning.”

The tone was set early on with Ottawa’s Karine Bombardier scoring at 2:28 in the first. Bombardier took a pass from forward Crystal Sauk and was all-alone when she put a wrist shot through Martlet goalie Delphine Roy’s five-hole.

Bombardier later assisted on Sauk’s first of the game, that came short-handed at 7:05. Bombardier got her second of the game just over two minutes later, also short-handed.

McGill had a lot of ground to make

f

up for with the majority of the game left to play.

The Martlets finally capitalized on a power play when Paula Mailloux got her second of the season off a lovely wrist shot right after the face-

Y o u ’v e

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off to round out the scoring-laden first period.

Ottawa’s Bombardier took no time to earn the hat trick, scoring just four minutes into the second period.

She sneaked out from behind the net

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* G e t T h e M c G ill T r ib u n e in y o u r In b o x .

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to make it 4-1 for the Gee-Gees.

The visitors rounded out their scoring by taking advantage of the Martlets’ atrocious defensive zone coverage. Jana Kocourek added insult to injury when she got a great pass from Priscille Cyr, who fooled Roy into thinking she was trying for a wraparound. Kocourek shot the puck over Roy’s glove from the slot and put her team up by four.

McGill wasn’t the only team struggling with defence, as Ottawa gave away the puck more often, but Nikki Klein was stellar in net for the five-year-old Gee-Gees’ hockey club, shutting down most McGill scoring opportunities. Cindy Anne Carufel was one Martlet that broke away from Ottawa defencemen multiple times but either couldn’t get a good shot off in time or was stopped cold

by Klein.

Véronique Lapierre got the other goal for McGill at the 8:58 mark of the third period, giving the crowd a small sign of hope that this could still be a decent game. Tn fact, it was the best period for the Martlets as the Gee-Gees were not consistent­ ly able to stay in the McGill zone.

Roy also showed signs that she could one day be a No. 1 netminder as she quelled a few odd-man rushes.

Ottawa now sits only one point behind the Martlets in the confer­ ence. Concordia won its weekend game as well and now trails McGill (4-1-1) by three points.

A goal is a goal is a goal “Definitely Nationals,” said Stoney Creek, Ontario native Katherine Safka when asked about the goal of the team this season, a sentiment echoed by her teammates.

“Were very confident with Kim in net. But our defensive zone coverage was poor [Saturday], but we know we

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can go all the way if those pieces are put together.”

Smith didn’t want to look quite so far into the future.

“We can compete against any­ body in the league and winning [the National Championship] is very attainable for us, but our short-term goal is to win the division first,” the coach said.

The Martlets will miss former captain Anna Cooper on defence this season, but Sarah Lomas of Toronto has already established herself as a bona fide leader, said Smith who enters his fourth year as head coach of the Martlets. He expects a lot out of his modest batch of rookies as well, but realizes that this level is a pretty big jump from high school.

“All our rookies have great potential to make the grade, they just need experience,” Smith said. “In games like this one it’s tough to give them that experience because if we get down early I’m going to be play­ ing my veterans.”

Smith says forwards Véronique Sansfacon o f Quebec City, and Brittany Privée of Pointe-Claire, Quebec are “rugged players with great hands” and should fit nicely into the roster.

“I’m really looking for [fifth-year right-winger Sophie] Acheson to break out even more this season, along with Safka,” said Smith, adding that the former has been a strong presence on his team over the course of her tenure. Acheson had 32 points last year, good enough for fourth place in Canadian scoring.

The Martlets head to the nation’s capital to play winless Carleton Saturday, and then return to McConnell Arena Sunday to battle Université du Québec à Trois Rivières.

A R O U N D TH E HO RN Continued from page 21

captain Dave Burgess scored for the Redmen.

In the win over Ryerson, Ken Davis got the winning goal, and fellow rookies Sébastien Langlois and Rheal Guenette each added one. Veterans Burgess and Greg DBlanc rounded out the scoring with one each for the easy win over the Rams. McGill outshot Ryerson by a lopsided 45-22 margin. Luc Vaillancourt made 20 saves for the win.

McGill is now 5-2 in regular season play, and will host Brock and Wilfred Laurier this weekend S plit decision for the M artlet vol­ leyball team

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s e a s o n

The volleyball Martlets had a disappointing weekend, recording two losses. On Friday, the team lost to Laval 3-1 (25-21, 25-20, 21-25 and 25-15). Christine Borisov had nine kills, Julie Heroux had eight kills and Anne Robitaille had seven kills and an ace. Maxine lefebvre bad 17 digs on the day.

On Sunday at home, the Mardets lost to Sherbrooke by a score o f 3-1 (21-25, 25-22, 25-17 and 25-18). Lefebvre had a 2.26 passing ratio out o f 3.00, in addi­ tion to making 17 digs. Borisov

had 10 kills and four aces, while Heroux executed eight successful kills.

The Martlets travel to Sherbrooke this Friday and will host Laval at home on Sunday. The team entered Sundays game in s three-way tie for second. McGill is now tied with Sherbrooke for rhirc with a 1-3 record.

Redmen volleyball searching for first win The volleyball Redmen got swept 3-0 by Laval on Friday am 3-0 by Sherbrooke at home Sunday The Redmen had low scoring sets against the Rouge-et-Or, 25-10, 25-15 and 25-19. Andrew Ro.es had seven kills, four digs and t ru stuffed block. Dan Holden lac seven digs and one stuffed block Sunday’s game agai nsi Sherbrooke was slightly mort promising with higher set scores of 25-22, 25-12 and 25-23. Rovehad six kills, four digs and one stuffed block. Adam Kouri record ed five kills and three stuflec blocks.

The Redmen are 0-4 in régulai season play and will have the same game schedule as the Martlets this week, playing both Sherbrooke anc Laval again.

r

The McGill Tribune, Tuesday, November 12, 2002

A DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVE

Sports 25

REFEREEING

T h e y w e a r strip e s , th e y b lo w w h is tle s : T h e m e n w e lo v e to h a te Kate Rhodes

The skill is mastered. The ball is in play. The whistle blows. The call is made. This is not a democracy.

Respect their authority.

Pensive as they walk the yard lines, the bluelines, the base lines and the sidelines, sports officials and ref­ erees put as much energy and dexter­ ity into every game they govern, as the players they supervise. They are objective masters of their sport, com­ mitted to fair play, good sportsman­ ship and precision. They are the voice of the rules as they carry on the traditions of the games we so dearly love.

But who are these neutral men in black and white stripes? On what is their wisdom founded? And most importantly, who are they to tell you what to do?

They are athletes. They are coaches. They are individuals who love the game so much, they live their lives close enough to taste it, but with the orchestrating aloofness of demigods. They are out there in the mud, in the rain; they don’t rest at half time, and they stay long after the last spectator has left the stands.

Always a step ahead of players, but one away from the ball, referees serve their sports by making them happen.

The entire reason for the game relies on the ref’s sensibility and consisten­ cy; he’s never wrong because his word is truth, and on this field, it’s his uni­ verse, baby.

Like the athletes with whom they run the field, referees dedicate themselves to the sports they love, but behind the whistle, they have a different perspective.

“It’s another way to see the game, because it’s different from when you play,” said hockey referee François Charron. “It’s great— peo­ ple are yelling at you, it’s not about sides and winning, it’s about keeping order.”

Charron began refereeing hock­ ey seven years ago after a broken tibia kept him from the ice.

“It took me 10 weeks to recover and when I came back I was nervous and I quit hockey, but I just wanted to stay in the game, so I tried refing once and fell in love with it. My goal is now to become a professional ref­ eree,” he said.

To go pro, “You must be very patient and do well at all your games, and hopefully get good evaluations, because we’re evaluated each and every game,” Charron explained.

Does this ref sympathize when the players question his call?

“No. They yell at you, but it’s part of the game. You have penalties to give to them if they cross the line and they know it, so you can do what you want with them. When you’re in there on the ice, with the puck, I’ve been hit quite often in the action.

However, now I’m the referee and fights are broken up by the linesmen, so I do not break them anymore, but I broke quite a lot when I was a lines­ man,” Charron said.

Rugby referee Simon Davis’ own theory of successful refereeing involves a solid mind and a firm fist.

“If you know what you’re doing, and you have a confidence out there and you make your calls and you explain them clearly, most of the players will respect you,” Davis said.

“Certainly the higher the level you

go, the easier it becomes for the play­ ers to know what’s going on, to know what the players expect from you and if you stick with your standards and are consistent then they won’t grum­ ble.

“What they don’t like is when you’re inconsistent and they never know what to expect from you, that’s when the referee’s going to get into trouble. A consistent referee is going to be respected by the players, even if he’s consistently bad, at least they know what to expect from you, how to set that play up.”

Davis, like Charron, was also an accomplished player, but chose a professional career over becoming a professional athlete.

“I don’t have the time to keep playing anymore and I want to stay in the game. Refereeing is a way to stay in it,” Davis said. “It’s something I enjoy, something I’m good at. I played rugby for 20 years, but work got in the way. For me, I have turned professional as a referee, but the pay is so low it’s not worth it.”

For Davis, work away from the pitch came to interfere with his involvement in rugby.

“I have a senior management role with one of the companies here in town and the time commitment with the job is that I don’t really get time to play as part of the team,” Davis said. “I deal with customers from all over the world, I can’t afford to end up on crutches, or with a black eye from an accidental bump.

It makes the wrong impression.

“So I had to make the decision, job and referee or just quit altogeth­ er, and I decided I didn’t just want to go cold turkey, so refereeing was the

easiest way to stay in the sport, with­ out having to quit everything,” Davis said.

There is also an immense differ­ ence between professional and ama­ teur rugby refereeing.

“Speed, intensity, the hits, the fitness levels, in this country especial­ ly, it’s a world apart,” Davis explained.

Davis has also refereed football, soccer and basketball, in addition to competing in all of them.

Does this ref sympathize if play­ ers curse and object?

“Sometimes, it depends. Refs are human, we make mistakes. I understand them getting frustrated when they perceive it’s gone the wrong way. Most of time when we give a call, it’s because the players have done something they’re not sup­ posed to, because they are too lazy to learn what the rules say they cannot

do, then no. If they are playing with­ in the rules, then yes, I’ve got a lot of empathy, but not for the guy that’s trying to cheat or is too ignorant to learn,” Davis emphasized.

Like the mind-altering day we discover our parents and teachers are real people, referees call the shots because they love the game, one that is rooted in memories o f past athlet­ ic lives of which fans have no knowl­ edge. Referees give themselves to the maintenance and execution o f sports for the enjoyment of spectators and the accomplishment o f players. So the next time you see a hotheaded player tell off a ref because he thinks he could make a better call, remem­ ber where the ref is coming from.

He’s studied that ice. He knouts that ice. And once, he probably sailed pucks down that ice.

D-LEAGUE CHRONICLES

B a d

M a m

Vlohit Arora

“I’ve never been more proud to je a Bad Mamma Jamma!” :xclaimed the goaltender after lefeating Sigma Chi 8-6 last Sunday ifternoon.

What was unclear by this statenent, however, was whether Arora vas talking about his team’s come­ back that snatched victory from the aws of defeat, or if he was just so tappy with the team’s unanimous lecision that he should remain their ;oalie.

As far as the game went, they lon’t get much more exciting than he Bad Mamma Jammas’ slugfest igainst DHL expansion team Sigma Dhi. In a game that featured four

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ties, four lead changes, and 14 goals (nine in the second period), let’s just say that there wasn’t a pair o f dry pants in the arena.

Sigma Chi was built from much the same mould as the Bad Mamma Jammas. There were a few really tal­ ented players mixed in with a most­ ly novice group, including a goaltender. The only difference was that even the novices on Sigma Chi were much bigger and stronger than any Bad Mamma Jamma.

The two teams traded goals back and forth in the first half, resulting in a 3-2 Sigma Chi lead.

Scotty Mao, who is now officially “on fire”, and Derek Smith scored for the Bad Mamma Jammas in the first period.

Though he seemed inexperi­ enced, the Sigma Chi goalie came up big and made some very nice saves.

It was almost as if he looked across the ice at Arora and said; “You’re not the only ‘generally lousy but can kind o f play well on occasion’ goalie on the ice.” The gauntlet was dropped, and the duel o f the goalies was on.

The second half jettisoned the

c ra s h

“goalie duel” idea pretty quickly.

Sigma Chi came out flying, and a 32 game became 6-3 for the frat with about five minutes remaining.

Sigma Chi looked quite impres­ sive at that point in the game, as scoring was not limited to the expe­ rienced players, but saw the less experienced players jump into the play as much as possible. This creat­ ed serious havoc in the Bad Mamma Jamma end.

On one play in particular, a rather large Sigma Chi player lum­ bered clumsily into the Bad Mamma Jamma zone with the puck, matched up one-on-one with Jason Northey, as reliable a player as they come in the DHL. What appeared to be a harmless rush resulted in a beautiful goal when the Sigma Chi forward wound up and unleashed a cannon o f a slap shot that buried its way through the smallest opening.

After the game, Arora discov­ ered identical welts on the inside of his bicep and his ribcage. It seemed like everyone on the Sigma Chi team who thought they had a decent slap shot decided to show it off by aiming them at Arora all game long.

F ra t

P a r ty

After the slap shot contest was over, the Bad Mamma Jammas regrouped and went on the offensive. They swore, spit, adjusted themselves, and made lude comments. Meanwhile, they started pressuring the Sigma Chi defence more, passing the puck well and peppering the goalie with shots. The strategy worked, as coach Matt Coming’s squad scored repeat­ edly to take a one-goal lead with just over a minute left. Smith scored twice more, and Northey and Mao added singles.

Sigma Chi, down to their last chance in the dying seconds of the game, pulled the goalie in favour of an extra attacker. It was at this point that Nili Isaacs and Casey Johnson asserted themselves. The team’s most aggressive defensive players clamped down on the Sigma Chi attack, and this sprang Macnee, who iced the game with an empty-net goal in the final minute.

One cannot say enough about Johnson. He is by far the most improved player, and this is on a team where everyone has improved exponentially. Before every game, he seems simply giddy at the fact that

in

s ty le

he’s putting on hockey equipment.

He plays every shift with an “I must be dreaming, this is too good to be true” attitude. Johnson is still wait­ ing for the first goal o f his career, but with the way he’s playing, it’s very likely he’ll achieve his dream this sea­ son.

The Bad Mamma Jammas had dodged a bullet. They had faced a talented team in Sigma Chi, spotted them a three-goal lead with five minutes remaining, and had only seven skaters on the bench. Yet still, through their determination and grit, they emerged victorious.

After the game, a relieved Corning addressed the media.

“I just want to say that you reporters create a controversy when there isn’t one, and it can be really destructive to a team. Luckily, my group of players are smart and know how to deal with made-up situations like this one,” he said referring to the goaltending controversy reported in this esteemed publication.

When asked about the game itself, Corning simply responded “I am the greatest coach ever.”

Bravo, Matthew. Bravo.

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