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I JANUARY 3, 2008

I VOLUME 11

I ISSUE 28

I MAUITIME.COM

I FREE EVERY THURSDAY

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY


CONTENTS

VOLUME 11 • ISSUE 28

59

THIS WEEK’S QUESTION Who would you like to see in a celebrity death match? Editor: Anthony Pignataro Matt Lauer vs. Bill O’Reilley

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Associate Editor: Starr Begley Pee Wee Herman vs. Barney Calendar Editor: Jessica Armstrong Oprah Winfrey vs. Star Jones Contributors: Mira Allen, Paisly Bender, Caeriel Crestin, Lloyd Dangle, Rob Parsons, Chuck Shepherd, Cole Smithey, Ynez Tongson Illustration: Guy Junker, Ron Pitts, Glenn Watson Photography: Sean M. Hower, Pietro Ortiz, Jason Waterhouse Art Director: Wendy S. H. Ortiz Dopey vs. Happy Graphic Designers: Emeline Sioson, Travis K. Tiffin Advertising Executive: Brad Chambers Gandhi vs. Mother Theresa Advertising Executive: Cynthia Matzke Ted Nugent vs. Paris Hilton Classified Sales: Robin Williams OJ Simpson vs. Viking Berserker Customer Service Rep: Mark Stockwell Floyd Mayweather vs. Uriah Faber General Manager: Jennifer Russo Alaka`i vs. Tita Collins Administrative Executive: Judy Toba Kids from South Park vs. Kids from High School Musical Administrative Assistant: Jennifer Brown Johnny Depp vs. Brad Pitt Web Design: Linear Publishing www.linearpublishing.com Publisher: Tommy Russo Linda Lingle vs. Tito Ortiz

MauiTime Weekly is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright © 2007 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. Maui Time Weekly may be distributed only by MauiTime Weekly’s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime Weekly is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime Weekly, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime Weekly are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime Weekly. Maui Time Weekly 33 N. Market St., Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 office (808) 244-0777 • fax (808) 244-0446 www.mauitime.com Deadlines: Display Advertising: Friday Noon Classified: Monday 4pm Calendar: Monday Noon Circulation: 18,000 copies of the MauiTime Weekly

4 MAUI COUNTY

Kapalua. Jessica Armstrong prefers her To Kill a Mockingbird production stripped to its bare essentials.

That chick who couldn’t stop speeding answers her hate mail in Letters. Anthony Pignataro finds that presidential candidate Ron Paul is right–far right, to be exact. Rob Report offers a few possible New Year’s resolutions to our esteemed local officials. Mira Allen looks into the fire that closed Charley’s Saloon in Paia. Pignataro attacks green building practices in Coconut Wireless. If you own a junky van and recently knocked down a wall in Lahaina, you probably don’t want to read this week’s Eh Brah! MECO’s recent rate hike propels it ever higher in Maui 10. And some nut turns a crater into art in News of the Weird.

21 Grid & Calendar

11 FEATURE STORY We tend to throw around the word “local” a lot, but what does it really mean? In the first installment of our new series examining what it means to be a local, Starr Begley asks a few residents about how they define the popular, though still ambiguous, term.

13 ONO KINE GRINDS Starr Begley opts for a simple meal of beer and potatoes at Mulligans on the Blue.

15 DA KINE CALENDAR Paisly Bender, if that is her real name, really wants to see Cyndi Lauper at the MACC. Then Starr Begley looks forward to another Wailuku Town First Friday, the Iao Theater play Family Laundry and a few holes at the Mercedes Championship in

18 FILM Cole Smithey says Charlie Wilson’s War makes light of how America got involved in the Soviet occupation of Afghanistan, and that’s not really a good thing.

19 Movie Listings

20 ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT Ynez Tongson is back! And she’s listening to reggae artist Brad Watanabe in advance of his upcoming show at Casanova!

29 BACK PAGES Restless Native admits that she’s been to the Mainland just once in her life, and that was 15 years ago. Sign Language says Pieces people aren’t as weird as they think.

CLASSIFIEDS 26 Personals 27 Classified Listings 31 Mind, Body & Spirit

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JANUARY 3, 2008

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LETTERSTOTHEEDITOR APPALLED! I was appalled to read your “news” coverage of the arrival of the Superferry, and the reporter’s amused attitude towards the Hui Malama students who expressed themselves (Coconut Wireless, Dec. 20, 2007). As a proud parent of a Hui Malama student, I will say we do not support or encourage any of our children to express themselves using profanity or anger toward others. We are saddened to see this display in any of our children. But on the other hand, these are pre-teen kids who have been displaced, overlooked, and generally had the middle finger put in their faces. An expression of frustration and anger is to be expected, and I would also be saddened if they were not frus-

trated and angry. These are children who study every day about their environment and are being led to live environmentally conscientious lives. So when individuals or entities act without a [conscience], they are angered and, I believe, rightly so. We teach our children to act with dignity and self-respect, but self-respect also comes with standing up for what you believe in. As a child, “indignation” might be a hard thing to express politely. But watch out; these children will soon be adults with the knowledge and ability to bring about change. They will remember this slap in their faces. -Melissa Stammberger, parent of a Hawaiian Outdoor Education program student, via email

WHALES!

NO LONGER BUSTED!

(Editor’s note: the following letter is in reference to James Mordovancey’s Dec. 20, 2007 story “Tall Ships and Cachalots: What it was like to be a whaler on Maui:”) Why is it written that, “few whales were here?” Whales have always been; sperm whale teeth were worn by ali‘i. Historians have said that the whalers were here NOT to work, but to rest, and one Lahaina historian said that the Humpbacks were just “too plain skinny” to be bothered with here in Hawai‘i. So, what is the real story? -K. Velasquez, via Mauitime.com

Mahalo to Anthony [Pignataro] and Jared [Libby] for a great story on my experience with the new excessive speeding law (“Busted!” Dec. 6, 2007). I meant to write sooner but I’ve been busy speeding around the island and reading my hate mail. I am pleased to see that the story stirred up some dialogue as that is all I wanted, for everyone to be aware of what was happening. Not everyone is tuned into Hawai‘i state laws. Personally, I read the San Francisco Chronicle. I’ve been back to see Judge Pollak and I am happy to report that my case is dismissed and she is an enthusiastic reader of Maui Time. The Public Defender likes you, too. -Laura “I Can’t Drive 45” Kaplan, via email

The Editor responds: Check out Mordovancey’s Mar. 1, 2007 story “Humpbacks in History,” which details how the large humpback migrations to Maui waters are a relatively recent phenomena.

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INTEGRITY? WHAT’S THAT? As a taxi driver, I have never been for or against the Superferry “The Year in Review,” Dec. 27, 2007), though I think obeying the law, as written, shows more integrity than, say, changing the law to suit yourself. Maybe I could get the governor to write a special law for me, too. Recently an Avis agent at the Kahului Airport said that she had counted 2,000 rental cars in their lot before the season started. Just four to five days later, after the beginning of Christmas week, she was done to 40. Forty cars, vans, etc., out of 2000. That means that 1,960 car drove off the Avis lot in about five days. This was just Avis. This doesn’t count Advantage, Alamo, Budget, Enterprise, Hertz, National, Thrifty… Not to mention the “used car” rental agencies all over Maui. That means that thousands of rental cars hit our streets and highways in a very short time. Should we worry about the traffic impact of the Superferry? I don’t. Still, the legally mandated Environmental Impact Statement would have been interesting. Hoo hum! -Steven Joshua Blue, Wailuku

Maui Time welcomes letters commenting on our coverage, but only if they’re complimentary. If you still wish to complain about something, please have the decency to use plenty of bad punctuation and grammar—that makes it easier for us to make fun of you when we respond. We also reserve the right to edit your letters. Send your letters to the editor via e-mail (letters@mauitime.com), regular mail (Letters to the Editor, Maui Time Weekly, 33 N. Market St., Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793-1742) or fax (808-244-0446). All correspondence must include your full name, hometown and phone number.


CAMPAIGN ‘08

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In his bid to be the next president of the United States, Texas Republican Congressman Ron Paul recently raised $6 million in Internet contributions during a single day. His poll numbers show him trailing far behind well-known GOP candidates like Mitt Romney and Rudy Giuliani, but there are signs that the renegade Republican’s monster grass roots effort is working—in a survey of all Google searches made between Dec. 7 and 11 by VoteUSA.org, Paul’s name came up 141,872 times, nearly twice that of Democratic Senator Barack Obama, his nearest competitor, who was the subject of 76,777 searches. Clearly, people want to know more on this most unusual presidential candidate. Lately a number of my friends have asked me what I knew of him. Then on Saturday, Dec. 22, Paul supporters held a small rally at Baldwin Beach in Paia, waving signs and leafleting cars parked nearby. One of the brochures tucked beneath windshield wipers showed a unique approach for a Republican hopeful, even if he is a bit of a renegade. “Ron has never voted for the Iraq War,” the Ron Paul for President! card said, outlining how Paul opposes the Patriot Act, a military draft, the war on drugs and corporate welfare. Printed with a photograph of supporters brandishing signs saying “Ron Paul Revolution” with the “evol” (“love” spelled backwards) heavily emphasized, this particular bit of campaign material unabashedly appealed to anti-war, anti-corporation liberals. Of course, Paul is anything but a leftist. One of the most conservative members of Congress, his ideology falls squarely on the right wing of the Republican Party, Iraq War opposition notwithstanding: CRACKING DOWN ON ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION SUPPORTS: “We must do whatever it takes to control entry into our country before we undertake complicated immigration reform proposals… No amnesty… No welfare for illegal aliens… End birthright citizenship. As long as illegal immigrants know their children born here will be citizens, the incentive to enter the U.S. illegally will remain strong.” (www.ronpaul2008.com)

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ABORTION OPPOSES: “I’m surprised that I don’t have more co-sponsors for my Sanctity of Life Act. It removes the jurisdiction from the federal courts and allows the states to pass protection to the unborn. Instead of waiting years for a Constitutional Amendment, this would happen immediately, by majority vote in the Congress and a president’s signature. It’s a much easier way to accomplish this, by following what our constitution directs us. Instead of new laws, let’s just use what we have and pass this type of legislation.” (GOP Values Voter Presidential Debate Sep 17, 2007) GUN CONTROL OPPOSES: “Gun control makes people demonstrably less safe—as any honest examination of criminal statistics reveals. It is no coincidence that violent crime flourishes in the nation’s capital, where the individual’s right to self-defense has been most severely curtailed.” (Ron Paul’s column “Texas Straight Talk,” Mar. 12, 2007)

OIL DRILLING IN THE ARCTIC NATIONAL WILDLIFE REFUGE SUPPORTS: “I’ve introduced The Affordable Gas Price Act (HR 2415) to deal with some of these issues. My bill… would open up ANWR for oil exploration and repeal the federal moratorium on offshore drilling.” (“Texas Straight Talk,” Nov. 25, 2007)

MINIMUM WAGE OPPOSES: “Raising living standards for all Americans is an admirable goal, however, to believe that Congress can raise the standard of living for working Americans by simply forcing employers to pay their employees a higher wage is equivalent to claiming that Congress can repeal gravity by passing a law saying humans shall have the ability to fly… [R]ather than pretend that Congress can repeal the economic principles, I urge my colleagues to reject this legislation and instead embrace a program of tax cuts and regulatory reform to strengthen the greatest producer of jobs and prosperity in human history: the free market.” (Congressional floor speech on HR 3846, which would have raised the federal minimum wage, Mar. 9, 2000) KYOTO TREATY ON GLOBAL WARMING OPPOSES: “I strongly oppose the Kyoto treaty. Providing for a clean environment is an excellent goal, but the Kyoto treaty doesn’t do that… It’s bad science, it’s bad policy, and it’s bad for America. I am more than willing to work cooperatively with other nations to come up with policies that will safeguard the environment, but I oppose all nonbinding resolutions that place an unnecessary burden on the United States.” (Online interview with “The Muckraker Report” at www.teamliberty.org, June 28, 2007) MTW

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ROBREPORT

BY ROB PARSONS ROBPARSONS@EARTHLINK.NET

You Say You Want a Resolution… New Years ideas to help change the world eventually rewarding him for making better choices by turning him into a fleshand-blood human boy. Tired of fairy tales, John? Well, so are the people of Hawai‘i, to whom you’ve fibbed often about the real impacts and purpose of your big, fast, $85 million military prototype ferry. Just promise that when your economic model for the ferry proves inadequate and runs aground that you won’t take the easy way out and blame “those environmentalists” for the demise of Hawai‘i Superferry. Come clean, confess that it was all about military contracts in the first place, and send the Alakai somewhere where it’s actually wanted or needed. And, if you wish upon a star, you may even get lucky and avoid running into Monstro, the whale.

It’s believed that the tradition of setting New Year’s resolutions dates back to the Babylonian culture, around 2000 B.C. It seems that people around the world have been breaking them ever since. Whether the goals are to exercise more, quit smoking, lose weight or get out of debt, they have one thing in common: they are short-lived. Armed with the knowledge that most resolutions last no longer than three weeks, I have a new strategy of approaching 2008. You see, while setting my own resolutions might improve my health, happiness or finances, there’s still the big picture to consider. The world we live on is big, complicated and in need of much more than a few band-aids here and there. So for 2008 I’m resolving to think big, and invite others to do the same. To that end, I’m offering resolutions to others—primarily our decisionmakers—to help nudge them in a better direction for the year ahead: To President George W. Bush: Demilitarize. More than 50 percent of our federal budget goes to defense spending, and that’s just obscene. Domestic problems abound—education, health care, crime, environmental degradation and urban sprawl— but we’re too busy financing more war games to notice. As a lame duck, you can presumably do as you please in your last year of office. So resolve to take a big bite out of our defense budget, starting with the atrocious rock video commercials for the National Guard that play on our movie screens. We’re sorry you were dropped on your head as a child, but we’d really like our country back now.

To Governor Linda Lingle: Resolve to use the Hawai‘i Superferry for all your Neighbor Island travels in 2008. Trust me, you’re going to love it. Never mind that flying is cheaper, won’t take more than half your day and doesn’t require taking Dramamine. There’s the 4 a.m. wake-up call, the posh Hahalua Lounge ($20 upgrade), those Molokai sea cliffs and running the slalom course through all the whales they’ve been spotting. Besides, the welcoming reception of Maui and Kauai citizens exercising their constitutionally protected rights to uphold our laws from abuse by leaders who choose to ignore them should be truly inspirational. Come to think of it, why don’t you invite Representative Joe Souki

and Senate President Calvin Say on your next voyage! To Hawai`i Superferry CEO John Garibaldi: You’ve been working awfully hard over the past few years for that fat $220,000 salary (though not hard enough to actually prepare an Environmental Impact Statement, or even hold public meetings on Neighbor Islands until the legislature required you to do so). So why don’t you resolve to spend more time with your grandkids in 2008? You know, quality time, like reading them stories. Perhaps you could start with the classic tale of Pinocchio, the little puppet boy whose nose grew longer every time he stretched the truth. Remember it was the Blue Fairy who appeared to help little Pinocchio avoid bad or risky behavior,

To the Maui Visitor’s Bureau: Resolve to wean yourself from the $3.8 million you get from the County of Maui’s annual budget. Downsize, already. We really don’t need to market Maui. If we take care of our environment, social ills and infrastructure, word of mouth will take care of the rest. But if we continue to overbuild beachfront time-shares and multi-million dollar condos, squander water resources, fail to protect our reefs and shut down the viable transient vacation rental sector of our economy, no amount of MVB promotion will convince people to come back for a second visit. Remember that our tourist economy is inherently unsustainable. If visitors stop coming in ever-increasing numbers, the ripple effect through our economy spreads far and wide. MVB should resolve to shift their focus to improving and protecting the experience of the visitors who do come to Maui, not endlessly casting out bait to hook more of them. The County Council could help them out by reallocatsee RESOLUTION, page 9

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Charley’s, right after the fire At about six a.m. on Dec. 27, Jim Fuller pointed his flashlight around the charred remains of Charley’s Saloon and Restaurant in Paia. The fire, which started at 1 a.m. on Christmas morning, had smoldered for an hour and a half until fire crews were able to put it out. The damage was estimated to be $350,000. “The fire inspector estimated that temperatures reached 2,000 degrees in here,” Fuller, who has owned Charley’s since 1969, said. The pool table in the back was destroyed, along with Willie Nelson’s platinum and gold records and other memorabilia on the walls. The bar itself will need a replacement; the ceiling fans had melted, their blades drooping towards the floor. “The cause of the fire is still under investigation,” Fire Chief David Kamalani said. It could have been much worse. The restaurant had been closed for the holiday, and no one was injured. All of the windows were closed, so the flames never got enough oxygen to turn into a full blaze. The unscathed beams in the ceiling revealed that the fire had spared much of the structure. In fact, from the outside it’s difficult to tell there had been a fire at all.

Above the kitchen entrance, a 60-inch flat screen television had melted almost to the floor. Fortunately, a glance through the doorway into the kitchen revealed that it was still intact, right down to the package of hamburger buns that lay untouched on a counter. The bathrooms, office and front dining area also escaped much of the damage. Fuller is optimistic about reopening within the next few weeks. “We are moving on as quickly as possible,” he said on Dec. 31. “A lot of the Charley’s employees are here. We are getting all of the junk out of here, and we are about to replace the carpet and all of the drywall. We will probably open the front dining room in two or three weeks.” The loss of Charley’s, even on a temporary basis, is a blow to bands that want to play the North Shore. “It was a great place that had a pretty good history,” JR Mathson of the band P.O.R.T.A.L.—who played just two days before the blaze—said. “It was a shame that it happened, because Charley’s was always a real fun place to hang out. I hope they are able to open again soon.” Fuller expects to open doors to the full restaurant within the next two to three months. For more information on the current status of reconstruction call the Charley’s office at 579-9668. MTW

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worth the same under the LEED checklist as installing a $1.3 million environmentally sensitive heating system.” While Brook points out that the USGBC is working on the LEED checklist, he also adds that the real goal here should be making “green communities”—not just green structures. But if that were the case, developers like Dowling would have a very hard time convincing people that projects like his building super-condos for the super-wealthy on the very sensitive Makena shoreline was in any way “green.”

COCONUT WIRELESS THE WEEK IN REVIEW

THURSDAY, Dec. 27

WEDNESDAY, Dec. 26

Now, today—nearly 65 years after the fact—the National Park Service is starting to investigate how best it can preserve the internment camps that held Japanese-Americans during America’s involvement in World War II. According to an Associated Press story in today’s Honolulu Advertiser, Congress has approved but not yet appropriated the grand sum of $38 million (about what this country spends on the Iraq War every four hours) to save “what is left of the camps” and “develop educational programs.” What’s even funnier than that is the following quote from a high school teacher named John Hopper, who’s trying to teach people about a camp near his school in Granada, Colorado: “I think it’s important for this country to try to understand the mistakes that we’ve made.” Mr.

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Everett Dowling’s LEED-certified office in Wailuku Hopper, try not to be disappointed if few agree with you. Anyway, the story is mainly concerned with those large-scale camps erected on the mainland, but for a time during the war, Maui also had a prison. Basically a temporary gathering camp, soldiers herded Japanese-Americans on the island there, where they stayed until they could be shipped over to larger camp on Sand Island on Oahu (see the Aug. 2, 2007 Maui Time story “The Camp” for more on this). Of course, there’s not much the National Park Service can do about the Haiku camp—it’s long since vanished completely from town. Mr. Hopper of Granada, Colorado might consider that one of our society’s mistakes, but to me, it was much more of a choice.

according to The Maui News.

MONDAY, Dec. 31 Identity theft! It’s the hot, actually fairly old trend that’s sweeping the nation— and the world—and the State of Hawai‘i still has no way to stop it! There’s “an absence of comprehensive administrative, technical and physical safeguards covering privacy and security of personal information,” says the 23-member Hawai`i Identity Theft Task Force, according to an Associated Press story in today’s Honolulu Advertiser. Guess the bright side is the situation will probably get so bad everyone’s identity will be stolen at some point, which means we can all get new identities. Yay!

FRIDAY, Dec. 28

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

PUMP DON’T DUMP IN OUR OCEAN WATERS!

BOYCOT T SEAFOOD FROM CANADA!

Let’s start off the week right: by poking a small but well-defined hole in the increasingly popular world of “LEED Certification.” Standing for “Leadership in Energy and Environmental Design,” LEED is a rating system designed by the nonprofit U.S. Green Building Council (USGBC) for architects and land developers. Builders and environmentalists are fast adopting LEED as their favorite buzzword—mega-developer Everett Dowling of Dowling Co. constantly advertises his new projects as LEED certified, and former state Representative Brian Schatz wrote in the Dec. 18, 2007 Hawai‘i Island Journal that, “every state, county, and federal building should be built meeting the LEED… standards.” The problem, as an article written by Daniel Brook and posted today on Slate.com makes clear, LEED is mostly just greenwash for big, otherwise non-green corporations. “The point system creates perverse incentives to design around the checklist rather than to build the greenest building possible,” Brook wrote. “Installing a $395 bike rack is

So the Alakai cancelled its voyage to Maui today because of “high sea conditions,” according to Hawaiisuperferry.com. The boat didn’t sail yesterday either, for the same reason. And the company just announced that bad weather will force the boat to stay in port tomorrow as well. Let’s recap: with heavily discounted fares, low passenger interest, voyages to Kauai indefinitely on hold due to intense residential hatred and trips to the Big Island still at least a year away, another ferry under construction, $180 million in federal loan guarantees, a $40 million barge-thing in Kahului to pay off and now weather cancellations, the Superferry doesn’t appear to be in a particularly strong financial situation, even with the state Legislature rescuing it from the perils of our own environmental laws. But it’s still got “super” in its name, right? And nothing that’s super ever fails, right?

SATURDAY, Dec. 29

TUESDAY, Jan. 1

Just heard that the Molokai Princess left port today, but the Alakai—she stayed in Honolulu Harbor. Go figure.

And now, on the very first day of 2008, let’s talk a bit about energy. Specifically, on a brief Pacific Business News story that came out a few days ago. “The state Department of Business, Economic Development and Tourism [DBEDT] said Friday that Hawaii residents are using 19 percent less energy per person than they did 36 years ago,” PBN reported on Dec. 28 on its website. And yes, little gimmicks like LEED do have something to do with our growing energy efficiency. But as is usual in the case of stories like this, such good news was tempered with even worse news: “the [DBEDT] report noted that nearly 77 percent of the state’s electricity and more than 99 percent of its transportation fuel is still dependent on petroleum.” This is indeed awful, but not so awful that we need to hand a big company like BlueEarth Biofuels license to start turning Southeast Asian rainforests into palm oil plantations. We may now be in the seventh year of the 21st century, but for Hawai‘i at least, this is still very much the Age of Oil, which I guess is why we probably won’t see the war in Iraq end any year soon.

SUNDAY, Dec. 30 Maui may not have a lot of evidence of its Japanese-American internment past lying around, but it does have plenty of ultra-luxurious hotel rooms and timeshares available for those of us—okay, you—who are so rich you’re just drowning in money. And that makes perfect sense. Our society values the whims and desires of super-rich hedge-fund managers more than those of high school teachers, right? Today’s Maui News has all the evidence you need: on Jan. 7, the recently remodeled Ritz-Carlton in Kapalua will reopen to the public. Among its new additions: 107 “residential suites” that “people” can buy for between $895,000 and $6 million. The hotel rooms are now a bit pricier, too, with nightly rates going from $599 all the way to $8,000. And who, pray tell, will be buying and paying for these rooms and suites? Correct: “The hedge-fun managers of the world are all in their 30s and 40s, and they’re the ones who have the income we’re looking for,” Michael Masterson, the Ritz-Carlton’s sales and marketing director, said,

Anthony Pignataro is now available in Twitter form at twitter.com/apignataro.

MTW


ROBREPORT RESOLUTION: continued from page 6 ing their annual stipend to something more essential to Maui’s long-term health and self-sufficiency. To the Maui County Council: Resolve to take a long view of their choices, and stop making lousy deals with landowners and developers. Case in point, Wailea 670. After enduring countless hours of public testimony and discussions of conditions of zoning, six council members couldn’t say no to a billion-dollar boondoggle foisted upon us by offisland investment firms. A seventh golf course in South Maui (private, at that)? Bulldozing cultural sites and native plant habitat? Uncertain, sparse water resources to irrigate arid Wailea? “Affordable” rental housing in a light-industrial area? That’s really the best we could do? Maui desperately needs council members who are willing to lead our community in bold directions, not just more of the “build, build, build” mentality that will leave us looking like Honolulu-junior. Here’s a gallant new idea: consider our food-production (or lack of it) as part of our infrastructure. For every rezoning or subdivision, require that an equal acreage be set aside for bona-fide farming to feed those who will live there. We ought to be setting goals for increasing local food supply just as we are setting benchmarks for greenhouse gas emission reduction and percentage of renewable fuels. Without those goals, its unlikely that we will do much to offset the huge imbalance in what we import and produce locally. To Mayor Charmaine Tavares: Resolve to listen more. Of course, that would mean that you’d have to be willing to schedule meetings with constituents, not shut them outside the ivory tower. Please remind your staff that they are public servants, first and foremost, and that requires actually returning calls and e-mails, even to those who may hold differing points of view from your own. Resolve to begin the listening process by embracing a new position in the complete shutdown of the vacation rental sector of the economy. When we determinedly hold a need to be right about something, we lose perspective and the ability to listen to alternative viewpoints. The vacation rental issue is not black and white; it encompasses all the nuances and colors of a rainbow. I saw that you did a good job of

listening throughout two days of the recent Energy Expo. Now let’s act quickly to support local renewable and sustainable choices for our energy future—not the green-washing “solution” proposed by Hawaiian Electric to open a palm oil pipeline to Southeast Asia. With abundant wind, waves, solar resources and pushes for energy efficiency and conservation, we can do much better. To Landis Maez of BlueEarth Biofuels: Resolve to talk to the community in 2008. Two Kiwanis meetings in 11 months isn’t a lot of public outreach. Note that avoiding public scrutiny at all costs is one of the reasons Hawai‘i Superferry failed to gain public acceptance or trust, except by those who had political connections, were invested or were buffaloed by the persistent public relations spin. Community input helps define a project’s success or failure. Maui’s citizens are not easily fooled, and aren’t buying that a biodiesel mega-refinery for imported palm oil is any sort of solution to our energy security or local self-sufficiency. And we can’t ignore rainforest destruction, endangered species habitat loss or displacing indigenous people, even when it happens thousands of miles away. It’s definitely time to talk to the community—and to listen.

EH BRAH! Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less (which we reserve the right to edit), changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent to “Eh Brah!” c/o Maui Time Weekly, 33 N. Market St, Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 or send an e-mail to

ehbrah@mauitime.com I should have known what kind of person you were when I saw you back into my concrete wall, then turn and take off down the street. Now a lot of people saw you do this, which is why you stopped. I shouldn’t have been surprised to see you get out of your junky van and start fast-talking me. You had no driver’s license, insurance, job or place to live—except the van, I suppose. So I called the cops, but they were busy with other fish to fry. So you gave me a bogus phone number and took off, promising that you’d come back and repair the wall. Yeah, right! Now I forgive you, but my landlord—who actually owns the wall you knocked apart—probably won’t. I hear he’s got a big family who really know the island, too…

To Hawaiian Electric: Ditto. This cockamamie “sustainable palm oil” idea is getting harder and harder to swallow. First, you sully the name of the Natural Resources Defense Council, an otherwise respectable conservation organization, by involving them in efforts to set criteria for procuring palm oil. You would have us believe that it’s all about global warming and less emissions from biofuels, disregarding that 20 percent of worldwide carbon emissions come from rainforest destruction, especially the slash and burn methods prevalent in Indonesia and Malaysia. As members of the Bali Climate Change conference told the United States delegation three weeks ago, “If you’re not going to lead, at least get out of our way.” HECO could do that by welcoming local energy production in a big way, in effect returning the “power to the people.” To everyone else: Resolve to use your voice and your vote this year. Both matter. Hope springs eternal every two years that we may finally elect a majority of council members and state representatives who can help turn the tide of plantation politics back to a government “of the people, by the people, and for the people,” as Abraham Lincoln described it in his Gettysburg address. But that requires an active citizenry, an involved community, and willingness to step outside of usual comfort zones. I resolve to do my best to be a part of that process. MTW

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 3, 2008

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MAUICOUNTY

BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO ANTHONY@MAUITIME.COM

The Maui 10 Who’s the county’s most powerful player? RANK

PREVIOUS

COMPANY

1

1

Alexander & Baldwin

2

2

Monsanto Hawai`i

3

4

Maui Electric Co.

4

3

Weinberg Foundation

5

5

Dowling Co.

6

7

Maui Land & Pineapple Co.

7

6

Tesoro Hawai`i

8

8

Goodfellow Brothers

9

9

Wailuku Water Co.

10

10

Hawaiian Telcom

NEWSOFTHEWEIRD GREAT ART! At press time, two major pieces of art at galleries in London and New York City were basically holes in the floors of the buildings, yet were the subjects of glowing reviews. Doris Salcedo’s “Shibboleth,” a large crack in the floor of a hall at London’s Tate Modern (on which at least 15 people have suffered minor injuries after tripping) is said to symbolize racial and class divisions in society. Urs Fischer’s “You” at New York’s Gavin Brown Enterprise is actually just a crater, 38 feet by 30 feet by 8 feet deep, that, according to one reviewer, meshes “themes of transparency, transformation, disruption and destruction.”

GOVERNMENT IN ACTION! The Army Corps of Engineers announced with great fanfare in June that its repairs and upgrades of levees in the Lakeview neighborhood of New Orleans, following Hurricane Katrina, would allow the system to hold back a future storm’s flood waters even if the level rose more than 5 feet beyond the Katrina level. However, in November, the corps announced that because of a mistake in calculation (an engineer had used a “minus” sign when a “plus” sign was called for), the expensive levee repairs would actually protect against flooding only 6 inches above the Katrina level.

COPS IN FLORIDUH

MORE POWER TO MECO As if there was any doubt, the state Public Utilities Commission (PUC— and yes, you can pronounce that “puke”)—approved MECO’s request for an “interim” rate hike for Maui County, according to a Dec. 22 Maui News story. Starting “immediately,” all residential customers in the county will see a 3.7 percent increase in their monthly electric bill— which translates to an average of between six and seven bucks a month—to pay for new generators at the Ma`alaea power station. Now MECO would have risen a lot higher—how many companies can get rate hikes at the flip of a switch?—except for the tiny fact that they’d asked for a permanent 5.3 percent hike. The PUC “will continue to review” that request, reported The Maui News.

GOOD NEWS FOR ML&P! It’s been a tough few months for old Maui Land & Pine. Tiger Woods bailed—yet again—on their big Mercedes Championship in Kapalua. The Maui County Council’s Land Use Committee held a quickie hearing on the company’s big Westside Pulelehua project, then dropped the matter indefinitely. Maui Land stock, which had been running about $37 a share in the spring, is now hovering only in the high 20s. But now, things are looking a lot sunnier. According to a Dec. 21 post on the Pacific Business News website, the quaint but outstanding Honolua Store in Kapalua has just expanded and renovated its deli and menu. And that is really something to celebrate. MTW

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JANUARY 3, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

Sheriff’s deputies arrested Cynthia Hunter, 38, in Brandon, Fla., in October, and she remained in jail for 50 days until a lab finally concluded that the “methamphetamine” in her purse was really dried cat urine that she had legally purchased for her son’s science project. And deputies arrested Andrew

BY CHUCK SHEPHERD CHUCK@MAUITIME.COM

Johnson, a white man, in Ocoee, Fla., in November, believing he was Anthony Johnson, a black man wanted on a felony drug charge. Andrew Johnson was allowed to post bond while the case was under investigation, but his driver’s license was confiscated, and his mother had to drive him to and from work.

THE NEW TORTURE When three men stole drugs from a dealer in Edwardsville, Ill., the dealer and a partner allegedly snatched one of the men and roughed him up, seeking payment for the drugs. In November, police arrested the alleged dealers after the roughed-up victim reported that he had been held down, paddled, had some hair shaved off, and then deliberately burned on the neck and shoulders by having freshly baked cookies taken straight from an oven and held against his skin.

JUST CAN’T STOP In recent incidents, two Wal-Mart customers were arrested for shoplifting after yielding to temptation while walking the aisles of stores in Mukwonago, Wis., and Okaloosa County, Fla. The Wisconsin man (reportedly sober for 16 months) impulsively downed seven 12-ounce bottles of Jack Daniel’s Lynchburg Lemonade that he saw on a shelf. Florida’s Christopher White said “the temptation was too great” when he spotted the White Rain hair spray, and that he removed the nozzles of two containers and drank the contents—and returned the empty containers to the shelf.

NOT READY FOR PRIME TIME Francis Rocca, 24, was arrested in Pittsfield, Mass., and charged with robbing a gas station in November after being identified by his victim, who pointed out that Rocca’s distinctly pimpled face was easily visible underneath the clear plastic bag he wore as a “disguise.” MTW

OVERHEARD... FIRST GUY: “Hey, Paris Hilton is here. She was on the plane with my mother in law.” SECOND GUY: “Yeah, I know. I’ve been shooting her all day. I wish she’d go home already.” -Conversation in Pakakaulo, Dec. 26


e work,play,love,raise families,eat and sleep in Hawai`i. We get the Augie T Show and laugh at Frank DeLima’s jokes. We wear shirts that proclaim “Hawaiian,” “Portuguese,”“Filipino,”“Haole” and “Samoan.” We slap stickers on our cars saying, “Grown Here Not Flown Here”and “Pono— Do What is Right.”

W

We’re local. But what is “local?” And why is it that what seems local to some isn’t to others? Why is it that a person born and raised in Hawai‘i who speaks proper English and fumbles with Pidgin is often deemed less local than a Polynesian from a completely different island chain who just arrived here a few years ago? Is a person who’s lived in Hawai‘i, immersed herself in its culture, fought for the cause of Native Hawaiians and farmed its lands for decades local—even if she wasn’t born here? What if this person’s skin color is white? And if this white person happened to be born in Hawai‘i, is she still a haole? One major misconception of local is that it’s interchangeable with Hawaiian. If local and Hawaiian are the same, then local food would consist of just taro, fish and pig: what we call “The Hawaiian Plate” in most Hawai‘i establishments. Local is a mixed plate–kalbi ribs from the Koreans, kalua pig from the Hawaiians, rice from the Japanese, dim sum from the Chinese and beef stew from the Caucasians. Don’t forget adobo from the Filipinos and sweet bread from the Portuguese. Local is a conglomeration of many different cultures, mixed together, heated up and ladled out onto the Hawaiian Islands. Local is controversial. It’s organic and fluid–changing and adapting with every individual’s unique perspective. Over the next few months, we’re going to be exploring this idea of what it means to be a local in Hawai‘i. For our first installment, we decided to start by asking a wide variety of people on Maui what they mean when they say “local.” Their answers are as diverse as the islands on which they make their home:

KATHY COLLINS Owner, Mana`o Radio (91.5 FM) Born in Chicago, IL Tough question! I’ve been asked this before and have never been satisfied with the answers I’ve given. Small kid time, my definition of “local” was totally racebased. Anyone brown and living here was local to me. And the Portuguese, of course. Then in seventh grade, I transferred from Makawao to Lihikai School, where I met classmates who immigrated from the Philippines. First time I had been around Filipinos who clearly were not locals. So then I thought one had to be able to speak pidgin to be a local. Of course, that doesn’t really cover it either.

By Starr Begley

Although I do consider pidgin to be the native language of locals. Pidgin is still to me a BIG part of being local. Because like any language, it reflects the way we think and feel. I don’t think you have to be born here to be local. I wasn’t—neither was Pele! But I was raised here by parents who were born and raised here, and who instilled certain values in me, which I identify with being local. Like being nonconfrontational, humble, considerate of others... all the qualities that are necessary when you have a lot of different cultures sharing very limited space. And I believe that pride in being local is a big part of being local. You can grumble and succumb to rock fever every so often, but

a true local knows there is no better place on earth to live and love. I think it’s like sexual attraction—you know it when you see/feel it. KENDALL GROVE UFC Fighter Born in Wailuku, Maui It’s about aloha, the island spirit. It’s being kind and nice. Local people are kind-hearted people. We’ll give you the shirt off our back, you know? Local is, “Treat people how you want to be treated.” [On being “local” while living on the mainland] I’ve been doing it for three years. I keep local not because I have to, but because that’s how I was raised. I was

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

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born with that–to treat others with respect. On the other hand, there’s haole. Haole isn’t “white” or just ‘cause you’re white. I have white friends that aren’t haole. Haole is bad vibes—guys who disrespect what’s yours. The old school haoles were old school white guys who enslaved and took over. Haoles are people who think they own everything–they try to control. It’s not God’s way.

PAUL WOOD Writer Born in Los Angeles, CA The word “local” means, “my family came out of the plantation camps.” Those camps were the cultural cauldron, centers of transformation, where people and families changed from their home cultures (Japanese, Filipino, whatever) to bona fide, pidgin-speaking islanders. That shared experience must have been intensely bonding. If you don’t have a grandparent or great grandparent who slaved away for agribusiness, you aren’t local and never will be.

GREG TURNER Ed & Greg Show (Wild 105.5 FM) Born in Los Angeles, CA. First of all, local isn’t Hawaiian. It has nothing to do with heritage, skin color or KILA KILA “THE BIG HAWAIIAN” culture. It’s about how we take different KAMAU cultures and indoctrinate them into a DJ, 103.7 FM “local” lifestyle–bringing different ethnicBorn in Wailuku, Maui ities and cultures and making them work First of all, being born and raised in together. It sounds cheesey, but it’s kind Hawai‘i is local. Being Hawaiian helps. of like weaving a tapestry of different culAlways looking out for Hawai‘i, the ‘aina, tures. To say about things “This is ohana. Food is a big Hawaiian,” makes you part: local style food–all sound like a stupid the different cultures, idiot. It’s insulting. A the stuff we grew up lot of things that we with. It’s the mentality consider local aren’t. I of giving back to the mean, we’re 5,000 Email your community. It comes miles from anything. thoughts to back to family. I’m all We adopt things and about my family, it’s a say they’re ours, but starr@mauitime.com huge part of my life. they’re really not. As for “haole,” nowadays the LORILEE WATT meaning has become someone Caucasian Registered Nurse, Maui Memorial who’s not from here. Lately when I hear it, Medical Center it’s in bad taste. You can say, “stupid Born in Wailuku, Maui haole,” but I can’t walk around and say, Being local isn’t how long you’ve been liv“stupid Hawaiian” or “stupid Chinese.” ing here, but being born and raised helps. It But it’s okay to bag on the white guy. doesn’t have to do with nationality. It’s a Racial discrimination is flip-flopped. I culture thing. It’s attitude and a mind set, a wasn’t born here, but I consider myself lifestyle–laidback. Guys that call off the local. I’m half Filipino. street, “Hey sistah, how you?” My white looking kid will probably end up being ERNIE CRUZ called a “stupid haole” in grade school by Former member of the Ka`au Crater Boys “local” local kids even though my parents, Born in Aiea, Oahu grandparents and I were raised here. But There are so many different issues. One it’s a good attitude, too, like are you going to cool ways of saying what is local is to go let the little old Japanese lady at Puk Sup surf today the last day of the year and go take your parking space? A real local would surf tomorrow. Surf the old year out and let her have it. Oh, and if you’re local you surf the New Year in. Basically, if you come know that if you live in Kihei and there’s an to Hawai‘i and you love Hawai‘i, not just be earthquake, you head Upcountry. here, but love it, then we love you. If you love Hawai‘i, it shows in your actions. If GIOVANNI ‘STEVEN’ CAPELLI you no love Hawai‘i, just go and make Owner, Casanova room for someone who loves it. If you love Born in La Spezia, Italy Hawai‘i, we love you. That’s how it is. Local is certainly somebody who lives here since more than... say 20 years. LESLIE TRUGLIO Haole is certainly an Italian man with a Manager, John Cruz thick accent and flirty eyes. What do you Born in Seattle, WA call an Italian man with a thick accent The difference between local and who lives here since more than 20 years? haole is not where you’re from or what Bah. But, seriously, who cares? What color skin you have. It’s an attitude and a cares is the “Aloha Spirit.” You have it? way of being in your heart. Being local You are local to me... and go Warriors! means you are easy-going, goodnatured, humble, compassionate and full LESLIE IKAWA of aloha. Being haole means you are Homemaker impatient, pushy, fearful, looking out for Born in Honolulu, Oahu yourself first and not in the flow with Local is T-shirt, shorts and rubber slipHawaiian culture. per. You just know. MTW

What does “local” mean to you?

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY


ONO KINEGRINDS

BY STARR BEGLEY STARR@MAUITIME.COM

Beer and Potatoes

(top to bottom) Bangers and Mash, Harps Beer Batter Fish and Chips and the Dagwood Sandwich

Mulligans on the Blue proves the Irish dominate us Americans in comfort food Brunch is my kind of meal. First thing in the morning, the only thing I want to do is consume massive amounts of caffeine. But I usually don’t actually eat something solid until around 10 or so; by then, I’m usually famished.

Mulligans on the Blue 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874-1131. Bar opens at 8 a.m. Food served 10 a.m.-1 a.m. $

Though tasty and tempting, I’ve never been one who can survive on just French toast or pancakes. I need something heavy, rich and filling–meaty and super high calorie—which pretty much means Mulligans on the Blue in Wailea is my dream restaurant. I’ve eaten lunch at the very Irish restaurant a few times in the past and tanked down my share of Guinness on the lanai, but until recently I hadn’t done brunch. I was missing out in a big way.

Last week my husband and I met up with a couple of friends and decided to order a bunch of different plates and sample each family-style. We decided on the fish and chips, Dagwood sandwich, Bangers and Mash and Shepherd’s pie. While waiting for our food to arrive we drank coffee, made fun of our spouses, gossiped and took in the awesome ocean view. Mulligans provides a super relaxing pub-like atmosphere while still giving you the “Wailea” vibe. I can’t quite explain it, but it leaves you feeling relaxed and refined. When the food came, the first thing I tried was the Bangers and Mash. Bangers are Irish sausages, and I was a little leery at first as I’m pretty faithful to the hot and spicy Portuguese sausage, but the Irish know their sausages. The flavor of the Banger was mild but tasty. It was smoother than Portuguese sausage, which can be a little chunky. I couldn’t place the subtle flavor going on until the server came to the table and explained that they’re poached in Harp beer. Brilliant! The Mash—mashed potatoes—were awesome. Totally homemade and not out of the box, they were covered in a rich gravy that had the same subtle beer flavor as the Bangers. You cannot fail with beer and sausage. Speaking of beer, they chefs at Mulligans make an awesome Harp beer batter for their fish and chips. Like most of us, I’ve eaten many a piece of fried Mahi,

Photos: Pietro Ortiz

(left to right) Chef Cole Dunbar, Office Manager Tina Brophy and Chef Chris Joiner

and this version is one of the best I’ve had. The Dagwood sandwich was good, filling and just plain beautiful to behold. We got it on marble rye and stuffed with turkey, ham, bacon, onion, pickles, lettuce and Dijon mayo. My hubby raved about it, but that’s because he didn’t try restaurant owner Mike’s mom’s famous Traditional Shepherd’s Pie. If I ever get to choose what my personal heaven is like, I’m requesting a never-ending supply of this dish. My husband passed it up because, “Shepherd’s Pie was the worst lunch at the cafeteria growing up.” His loss was my gain since I got to eat his portion. Seriously, you need to leave any preconceived notions of what

Shepherd’s Pie is all about until you taste what it’s supposed to be. The dish was loaded with tender beef, veggies and gravy and then topped with creamy mashed potatoes. It was so rich and flavorful—almost like a perfect stew. Overall, the service was warm and friendly, the food excellent and the ambiance unique. What more could a diner want? Live Celtic music? That’s dinner. MTW

The Shepherd’s Pie

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 3, 2008

13


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Time After Time Friday (Jan. 4) 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC [MUSIC] Most of us think of Cyndi Lauper from the 80’s, and her hits “Time After Time” and “Girls Just Want to Have Fun.” It’s no wonder we define Cyndi for her Grammy winning first album She’s So Unusual, which catapulted her to the top of the music industry and has sold over 16 million copies worldwide. In her new album The Body Acoustic, Cyndi returns to her favorite hits but adds new material, creating a cohesive work that’s been called “timeless and contemporary.” With the esteem of her newest record and the success of her recent True Colors Tour in support of human rights, she and her band promises some of our favorite Lauper hits from the 80’s delivered from an artist who has grown with her listeners over the past 20 years. Tickets: $55, $65, $75. 242-7469. www.mauiarts.org [PAISLY BENDER]

SEND YOUR LISTINGS & PHOTOS FOR DA KINE CALENDAR TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM OR FAX (808) 244-0446 MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 3, 2008

15


ThIS WEEK’S PICKS by Starr Begley

Dirty Laundry Friday-Saturday (Jan. 4-5) 7:30 p.m. at the Iao Theater, Wailuku

Hana Hou Friday (Jan. 4) 5-7:30 p.m. on Market and Main, Wailuku [EVENT] My, how time flies. We’re already coming up on another First Friday in Wailuku town. Bring grandma, grandpa, auntie and uncle down to peruse the shops, eat some food, listen to music, view the art and take advantage of the great deals that many of the town’s merchants will be providing to ring in the New Year. I even heard a rumor that Jamaican reggae performer Gavinchi (the same one who rocked Casanova a few weeks back) will perform next to Requests Music. For more information call 249-9710.

THURSDAY

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Saturday

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SPENCE JAH will host BW the CD release party with NEXT GENERATION Special Guest DJ ADDAMON Roots Reggae Rock

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Make it a memorable evening. Dine and dance at Casanova. For dinner reservations call 572-0220 www.casanovamaui.com

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JANUARY 3, 2008

[STAGE] Family Laundry, written by late playwright Tremaine Tamayose and the staff of the Kamehameha School’s Safe and Drug-Free School program, is a musical/comedy/drama about a Hawaiian family dealing with alcoholism. The title is based on the local opinion that it’s wrong to expose your family’s secrets and problems to others, even though that’s actually the healthiest thing to do. Tickets: Free. For more info visit www.mauionstage.com.

MAUI TIME WEEKLY


Golf Gods

Bare It All

Now-Sunday (Jan. 6) at the Plantation Course, Kapalua

Monday (Jan 7) 6:30 p.m., Iao Theater, Wailuku

[SPORTS] Get out your visors and sunscreen–it’s time for the Mercedes Championship. This tournament kicks off the 2008 PGA season and you won’t want to miss a chance to watch, live and in person, the best of the best in golf as they run around and hit little white balls with high-tech clubs. When was the last time you had the opportunity to be featured as a “oohing” and “ahhing” spectator on the Golf Channel? Tickets: $225-$20. Visit www.kapalua.com for more information.

DAY

[THEATER] A play with no sets, costumes or lights? No stage directions or line cues? Not for Bare Essential Theater’s monthly performances, where all that’s needed is a good script, a dozen or so talented actors and a very bare stage. This month’s script is To Kill A Mockingbird, based on the classic Harper Lee novel that most skimmed back in grade school and some poured over in college English classes. To refresh your memory, the story is about eight-year-old Scout Finch and her experiences with racism and inequality growing up in the depressionera deep South. There will be treats at intermission. Tickets: Free. Visit www.mauionstage.com for more info. [JESSICA ARMSTRONG]

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Purchase any breakfast meal and recieve your 2nd breakfast meal of equal or lesser value for FREE! A vailable only for dine-in. Good at any Moose location on Maui & Oahu. Valid during breakfast hours only. Beverages not included. This promotion is subject to change or cancellation without notice.

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MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 3, 2008

17


FILMCRITIQUE

BY COLE SMITHEY COLE@MAUITIME.COM

Mocking Afghanistan How the West was lost Based on 60 Minutes producer George Crile’s 2003 book, Charlie Wilson’s War is a fast-food history lesson in the policy methods that Texas Democratic Congressman Charlie Wilson used to arm and train Afghanistan’s Mujahideen army in order to defend against Russia in the early ‘80s. There’s barely a reversal or character arc to be had as the boozing and womanizing Charlie (Tom Hanks) aligns his golly-gee-we’vegot-to-do-something politics with rich Texas socialite-bible-thumper Joanne Herring (Julia Roberts).

Charlie Wilson’s War

★★★★★ Rated R/97 min.

Philip Seymour Hoffman steals the movie with an outrageous introduction scene as CIA career loose cannon Gust Avrakotos. Director Mike Nichols clearly pines for the pre-AIDS days of sexual liberation when T&A was a requisite means of doing business and rubber-stamping foreign policy. In place of a plot, screenwriter Aaron Sorkin (writer of television’s West Wing) supplants a stylistic

Ever wanted to see Hanks and Roberts in bed? Neither did we! veneer of dialogue gloss so thick that Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts are like giant fleshy insects encased in transparent amber. Their characters might bed down together in scenes that the filmmaker believes are provocative but the only bodily fluid flowing is greasepaint. Tarantula Roberts embraces scorpion Hanks and we marvel at watching her remove clumps from her thick false lashes with a safety pin. Career bachelor Wilson might snort coke with numerous naked women in Vegas, but he’s the only man in government ready, willing and able to examine the Afghan resistance, which the

U.S. is providing a paltry $5 million dollar a year donation. Charlie gets an audience with Pakistan’s President Zia (Om Puri) only to have his dimwitted American ass handed to him for his predictable ignorance of their culture and territorial problems. But good ol’ Charlie is up for an escorted sojourn to an Afghan refugee camp where he sees first hand the effect of Russia’s landmines and helicopter attacks on Afghanistan’s women and child soldiers. Wilson takes up the people’s cause with a passion that’s so altruistic and naive that you’d think he was a kneejerk communist.

Once back on American soil, our savior to the Afghan people lucks into a working relationship with bottom-line CIA fixer Gust who shepherds through a deal for Israel to sell Russian-made rockets to their Muslim enemies since it would be unacceptable for American-manufactured arms to be used against the Russians. The contentious pact is inked after a campy scene wherein a lusty female friend of Charlie’s does a naughty belly dance for Egyptian diplomats. The filmmakers have conspired to make a campy, satirical movie about the way American funded and trained the soldiers of Osama bin Laden. Every line is delivered with a wink and a nudge as if to exonerate our politician’s acts of stupid good will because American policies are committed with the same smirk that George W. Bush has made a permanent contortion. There’s actually nothing funny about the way America has handled its foreign policy in the last 40 years. It’s fine to encourage its audience to root for Charlie Wilson’s success at moving the U.S. budget for Afghan assistance from $5 million to $1 billion a year, while neglecting to look at what that money could have done for the American people, but it’s not a convincing ploy. Paying to surrender two hours of your life to watch Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts play debauched power brokers is an insult I would wish on my worst enemies just to keep them occupied. If there’s any message here, it’s one that anyone with common sense already knows: war is for suckers. MTW

SATURDAY JAN. 12th 10 PM • $20 COVER

Monday Nights

10PM

LIVE MUSIC

18

JANUARY 3, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY


MOVIECAPSULES

BY JESSICA ARMSTRONG CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

Maui Film Festival’s Candlelight Cinema

Maui Film Festival Castle Theater, 572-3456 Silk - R - W only 5, 7:30

Ka’ahumanu 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center, 875-4910 Alvin and the Chipmunks - PG - Th 12, 2:20, 4:40, 7:10, 9:20; F-Tu 12, 2:20, 4:40, 7:10, 9:20; W 2:20, 4:40, 7:10, 9:20.\ Charlie Wilson’s War - R - Th 12:10, 2:40, 5:05, 7:30, 9:45; F-Tu 12:10, 2:40, 5:05, 7:30, 9:45; W 2:40, 5:05, 7:30, 9:45 The Great Debaters - Unrated - Th 12:05, 3:25, 7:05, 9:50; F-Tu 12:05, 3:25, 7:05, 9:50; W 3:25, 7:05, 9:50 The Kite Runner - PG13 - Th 12:15, 3:10, 6:30, 9:25; F-Tu 12:15, 3:10, 6:30, 9:25; W 3:10, 6:30, 9:25 National Treasure: Book of Secrets - PG - Th 12:35, 3:55, 7:15, 10:10; F-Tu 12:35, 3:55, 7:15, 10:10; W 3:55, 7:15, 10:10 The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep - PG Th 12:20, 3:20, 5:50, 8:30; F-Tu 12:20, 3:20, 5:50, 8:30; W 3:20, 5:50, 8:30

JUNO - PG13 - Comedy - Juno is a teen who, though really smart, ends up pregnant, then decides to find the perfect wealthy, suburban couple to raise her baby. I’m sure this kind of thing happens all the time. 91 min. (Anthony Pignataro)

New This Week ONE MISSED CALL - R - Horror - Hot college girls receive blood-curdling voice mails from their near-future selves at the moment of their death, then die three days later. These calls are punctuated by an ominous ring tone, and one unlucky young lady is racing against time to discover what the f**# is going on. 87 min. SILK - R - Art, Foreign - In this story about passion and obsession a young man finds himself falling madly in love with a Japanese concubine and they must struggle to resolve their East-meets-West barriers. 110 min

Now Showing ALIEN VS. PREDATOR: REQUIEM - R Sci-Fi - And here I thought Alien and Predator had settled all their issues back in 2004. Silly me. Stars a bunch of ìactorsî who must really be desperate for work. 86 min. (AP) ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS - PG Family - Say it ain’t so! After twenty-something years I have finally, FINALLY gotten the Alvin and the Chpmunks theme song out of

SHOWTIMES

Kukui Mall “Oh my GOD! Not the hooded figure! Anything but that!” my head and now you’re saying they’re back? Nooooooo! (Plot: Chipmunk brothers Alvin, Simon and Theodore are adopted by a human named Dave. 88 min (Starr Begley CHARLIE WILSON’S WAR - R - Drama - Tom Hanks plays U.S. Congressman Charlie Wilson, a womanizing right-winger who convinces the CIA to start arming anti-Soviet guerrillas in Afghanistan during the 1980s. And we all know how wonderfully that little operation turned out! 97 min. (AP) ENCHANTED - PG - Family - Princess Giselle is banished from her storybook dream land and plopped down in modern-day Manhattan. Prince Charming is waiting for her back on the other side, but she falls for Mr. Wrong in the gritty New York streets. 108 min THE GOLDEN COMPASS - PG13 - Action Daniel Craig and Dakota Blue Richards star in this imaginative movie that tells the story of a land where people’s soul’s manifest themselves into animals. A twelve year old girl (Richards) must save not only their world but hte regular human world as well. 114 min (SB)

were the last guy on earth” line. Anyway, he’s (along with his trusty side-kick German Shepherd) looking for a cure to the cancer-killing virus that wiped out the planet. Oh yeah, and there’s hairless flesh eating vampires. Can’t forget about them. 100 min (SB) THE KITE RUNNER - PG13 - Drama - In this touching movie about friendship two young boys are torn apart by tragedies of war and years later one attempts to set things right, even if it means risking his life. 127 min. NATIONAL TREASURE: BOOK OF SECRETS - PG - Action - Nic Cage goes on another ass-kicking global quest on the hunt for treasure and hidden history when a missing page from the diary of John Wilkes Booth reveals details about the murder of good old Abe Lincoln. 124 min NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN - R - Thriller Tommy Lee Jones plays a tired West Texas sheriff trying to catch a brutal but really odd looking killer who is himself chasing a guy who found a bunch of money. Directed by the Coen Brothers. 122 min. (AP)

THE GREAT DEBATERS - Unrated - Drama Denzel Washington plays an African-American teacher in the South during the 1930s who teaches students the subtle nuances of debate during that-what is the word? Ah yes- racially explosive time. 123 min. (AP)

P.S. I LOVE YOU - PG13 - Drama - Holly is devastated when her husband falls ill and dies suddenly, but is soon shocked and comforted by a series of letters and messages that are delivered from him from beyond the grave. New meaning is given to the term “romance is dead.” 126 min.

I AM LEGEND - PG13 - Sci-Fi - Will Smith plays the last guy on Earth, which makes me think twice about the, “I wouldn’t screw you if you

SWEENEY TODD: THE DEMON BARBER OF FLEET STREET - R - Musical - Tim Burton and Johnny Depp pair up again in this gory and gothic tale about a serial-killing barber who slits the throat of his patrons before passing on the bodies to his devious side-kick girlfriend who grinds up the bodies and puts them in meat pies, which are then sold back to an unsuspecting public. Sounds like musical material to me! 117 min

$10

WED., JANUARY 9

5 PM & 7:30 PM

4-FILM MFF PASSPORT Single Tickets - $12 Phone: 572-3456 www.mauifilmfestival.com

WALK HARD: THE DEWEY COX STORY - R - Comedy - A satyrical look at the typical rock star storyline: a talented small town musician becomes famous, writes songs that change the nation, sleeps with 400 women, marries multiple times, has 22 children and a chimp, makes friends with other rock stars, does drugs, does more drugs, goes to rehab, relapses... You know how this goes. 96 min THE WATER HORSE: LEGEND OF THE DEEP - PG - Family - Once upon a time in Scotland a young boy finds an unusual egg and takes it home to hatch, nurtures it and releases it in a lake, giving life to the strange creature soon to be immortalized in history as the Loch Ness monster.111 min.

1819 South Kihei Road, 875-4910 Alien vs. Predator: Requiem - R - Th 1:45, 4:45, 7:45, 10:05; F-Tu 1:45, 4:45, 7:45, 10:05; W 3:45, 7:45, 10:05 Charlie Wilson’s War - R - Th 1:15, 4:15, 7:15, 9:50; F-Tu 1:15, 4:15, 7:15, 9:50; W 3:15, 7:15, 9:50 I am Legend - PG13 - Th 1:30, 4:30, 7:30, 10; FTu 1:30, 4:30, 7:30, 10; W 3:30, 7:30, 10 National Treasure: Book of Secrets - PG - Th 1, 4:05, 7, 9:45; F-Tu 1, 4:05, 7, 9:45; W 3, 7, 9:45

Maui Mall Megaplex Maui Mall, 249-2222 Alien vs. Predator: Requiem - R - Th 2:20, 2:50, 4:40, 5:10, 7, 7:30, 9:20, 9:50; F-Su 12, 12:30, 2:20, 2:50, 4:40, 5:10, 7, 7:30, 9:20, 9:50; M-W 2:20, 2:50, 4:40, 5:10, 7, 7:30, 9:20, 9:50 Enchanted - PG - Th 3:05, 6:50, 9:25; F-Su 12:15, 3:05, 6:50, 9:25; M-W 3:05, 6:50, 9:25 The Golden Compass - PG13 - Th 1:40 2:40, 6:55, 9:35; F-W 1:40, 4:20, 6:55, 9:35 I am Legend - PG13 - Th 1:30, 2:05, 2:30, 4, 4:35, 5, 6:30, 7:05, 7:25, 9, 9:35, 10; F-W 1:30, 2:05, 4, 4:35, 6:30, 7:05, 9, 9:35 Juno - PG13 - F-Su 12:05, 2:25, 4:45, 7:10, 9:30; M-W 2:25, 4:45, 7:10, 9:30 No Country For Old Men - R - Th 3:30, 6:35, 9:20; F-Su 12:40, 3:30, 6:35, 9:20; M-W 3:30, 6:35, 9:20 One Missed Call - R - F-Su 12:20, 2:45, 5, 7:25, 9:50; M-W 2:45, 5, 7:25, 9:50 P.S. I Love You - PG13 - Th 3:30, 6:30, 9:30; F-Su 12:30, 3:30, 6:30, 9:30; M-W 3:30, 6:30, 9:30 Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street - R - Th 1:30, 4:15, 7, 9:45; F-W 1:30, 4:15, 7, 9:40 Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story - R - Th 1:55, 2:25, 4:20, 4:50, 6:45, 7:15, 9:10, 9:40; FSu 12, 2:25, 4:50, 7:15, 9:40; M-W 2:25, 4:50, 7:15, 9:40

Front Street Theater 900 Front Street, 249-2222 This week’s show times were not available at press time. Visit www.mauitime.com for updated schedule Alvin and the Chipmunks - PG - Th 4, 6:45, 9:15 Charlie Wilson’s War - R - Th 4:15, 7, 9:30 National Treasure: Book of Secrets - PG - Th 3:30, 6:30, 9:30 The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep - PG Th 3:45, 6:30, 9:10

Wharf Cinema Center 658 Front Street, 249-2222 This week’s show times were not available at press time. Visit www.mauitime.com for updated schedule Alien vs. Predator: Requiem - R - Th 1:30, 4, 6:30, 9 I am Legend - PG13 - Th 2, 4:30, 7, 9:30 Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story - R - Th 1:45, 4:15, 6:45, 9:15

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 3, 2008

19


ART&ENTERTAINMENT

Audio Herb Reggae musician Brad Watanabe defines “chillax” Whenever I think about compliments, the best ones are always drug comparisons. What’s not to like about being compared to something that’s mind-altering and potentially addictive? So, when someone described Brad Watanabe’s music as “Audio Herb,” I just had to try it out. Like a good session, Watanabe’s music leaves the listener feeling relaxed, comforted and feeling good.

Brad Watanabe and Next Generation Jan. 5, 10 p.m. at Casanova, Makawao. Tickets: $15. For more info, visit myspace.com/ninjafire808

As a gay reggae musician, Watanabe brings a fresh outlook to a nearly over-exposed music genre in Hawai‘i. Once devoted to Rasta culture, he diligently read the Bible and abstained from meat. But of course, many organized religions have their pitfalls, especially in regards to sexuality. Today, Watanabe says he doesn’t tie himself to just one religion or culture, preferring to learn from every culture and religion. Like many musicians, Watanabe sings about topics like love and the struggles of the human experience. But there’s also an underlying message of being alone, even when surrounded by friends. This is evident in his song “Meditation”—even when being persecuted, don’t allow others to tell you what to be. While Watanabe has succeeded through difficult times in his life, he acknowledges and thanks his band mates from Ooklah the Moc

20

AUGUST 2, 2007

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

for their support. Watanabe hails from Kailua, Oahu. You’ve probably heard and seen him before; in addition to Ooklah the Moc, he’s played and recorded with Paula Fuga, The Next Generation and Stir Crazy. He’s also freelanced with the Honolulu Symphony and the Long Island Symphony. And he’s played with reggae greats such as Mikey Dread, Pam Hall and Humble Flow. The longhaired artist is certainly driven. Just 22, he’s been playing music for about 19 years. There’s an evident island-flavor to his music, and his influences range from traditional Hawaiian music to classical to roots reggae. Upflow, released by Ninjafire Records, is Watanabe’s first solo record. Watanabe wows the listener with his artistry on vocals, bass, guitar and keyboard. The title, Upflow, is about staying positive and remaining easygoing. This is a welcome message in an era of instant gratification and negativity. Lyrically, Upflow is beautiful. Rather than solely relying on catchy rhythms, Watanabe treats the listener to lyrical storytelling. Watanabe mixes spirituality, philosophy and universal elements of the human experience that will have you relating to at least one of the tracks. The music actually calms me down so much I want to incorporate his lyrics into my everyday speak. I’m hoping that will make me seem mellow, yet still mysterious. Sure, the idea looks good on paper, but I’ve got a sneaking suspicion that spouting pearls like, “I am alone in my own meditation, so don’t you come in here with depression” only works when you possess a melodic, crooning voice and not a slightly nasal one. Even so, I’m still hoping to seduce some poor soul to the tune of “Loving Feeling,” quite possibly my favorite track on the record. Who wouldn’t think the line, “For tomorrow I may go away, so today I must be happy. And it’s you, who brings this to me, this loving feeling” is a great pick-up line? MTW

BY YNEZ TONGSON YNEZ@MAUITIME.COM


DA KINECALENDAR Here Comes the Commander - Thu., Jan 10. If

BIG SHOWS

you were around in the 1969 summer of love you

Cindy Lauper - Friday, Jan 4. Cindy Lauper’s music is timeless. The 1980s MTV icon has proven time after time that she has a sound unlike any other. She’s well know for songs like “Girls Just Want To Have Fun,” for rocking that impossibly blonde hair and for singing in a pitch so unusual that karaoke stars drop like flies in the face of her classics. This will be Lauper’s first Maui performance and she’ll be singing from her new album, The Body Acoustic, which dives into both classic and original material and celebrates one of Lauper’s favorite instruments, the dulcimer. It’s sure to be a high energy, heartfelt, unforgettable show. Tickets: $75, $65, $55. 7:30 p.m. 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului, HI, 96732. 242-7469. To Kill a Mockingbird - Monday, Jan 7. Bare Essential Theater presents a reading of this play, based on the novel by Harper Lee, about a young boy growing up in 1935 Alabama amidst rampant racism. Growing up I refused to read this book because I was against animal cruelty. Duh. Free. 6:30 p.m. Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku, HI, 96793. 2426969. J. Wail - Wednesday, Jan 9. “What is J. Wail?”, you might ask. This one-man-band fuses electronic beats with live recordings to creat an all-live experimental dub funk booty shakin experience unlike any other. No two shows are the same, so don’t miss a chance to see what happens when J. Wail takes the stage. 9 p.m., South Shore Tiki Lounge, Kihei, 874-6444 for ticket info.

TICKETS ON SALE

BY JESSICA ARMSTRONG CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM www.naturalmysticproductions.com for ticket sale locations.

might remember when Commander Cody and His

Da Braddahs - Fri., Jan 18. Those local fools James

Lost Planet Airmen dropped onto the radar with their

Roche and Tony Silva are up to their usual funny busi-

American roots-rock-swing-boogie woogie sound.

ness, making fun of local cops and playing innane

Songs like “Hot Rod Lincoln” and “Lost in the

characters, like a Samoan father and son tree trim-

Ozone” grazed top 40 charts while the band shared stages with big names like John Lennon, The Doors and Alice Cooper. Shake your booty with George “Commander” Frayne, who always dishes up a spicy show to stir up even the toughest audiences. Tickets: $45, $40, $35. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Jake Shimabukuro & Maui Pops - Sat., Jan 12. `Ukulele virtuoso Shimabukuro amazes audiences across the nation as he strums and plucks an ubelievable variety of music from the two-octave, four-stringed instrument, proving the `ukulele is not just for Hawaiian music anymore. He plays jazz, blues, classical and rock as well, and here on Maui he’ll be playing along with the sweet sounds of the

ming duo or a nutty, microphone-wielding Don Ho. They’ve been cracking up audieces at home on their OC16 Hawaii television program and will be splitting sides live in Kahului, too. Tickets: $25. 7:30 p.m.,

McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242-7469. Shanghai Circus - Mon. & Tue., Jan 21 & 22. Daring acrobatics, astounding arial artistry, unnerving feats of knife-throwing, ubelievable plate spinning, jugglers, contortionists, balancing acts and more at this incredible annual show that brings the best circus performers from China to amaze Maui audiences. Don’t miss this year’s show, it’s always new, different and exciting. Tickets: $23, $18, $10. 7 p.m.,

Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

Maui Pops Orchestra. Tickets: $45. $35, $10. 7:30

EVENTS

p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469. S.O.J.A. - Sat., Jan 12. Virginia-based roots reggae band Soldiers of Jah Army are spreading their conscious dub sounds around the world and here on Maui. They'll share the stage with local favorites Mama Roots Run Deep, featuring Sistah Ash, Versatile, DJ Addamon and M.C. Spence Jah from Q103. The show is all ages, with a beer garden for people 21 and up. The Hard Rock Cafe in Lahaina is hosting the after party, with a live performance by Versatile, 21 and up. Tickets: $25 in advance, $35 at the door. 4 p.m., Lahaina Civic Center. Visit

First Friday - See Picks of The Week pg. 16. 57:30 p.m., Wailuku. Stellar Rejuvenation - Experience the natural healing benefits of soliton lasers. Free. 4-6 p.m. The Studio Maui, Haiku Marketplace, Haiku, HI, 96708. 575-9390. Biofeedback - Mary Higgins, QXC/SCIO practitioner, helps you energetically rebalance after living yet another day in a toxin-filled world. Walk-ins only. Sliding scale pricing. 2-5 p.m. Dragon’s Den. 5732424. Contact Improvisation - Sounds dirty, doesn’t it? Actually, it’s exercise meets dance, meditation and stretching. By donation. 4-5 p.m. Maui Lotus Yoga, Kihei. 874-9642.

Saturday, Jan 05

Thursday, Jan 03 Come Out and Play - Elizabeth Ann Brandon, MA wants to make friends with your inner child using cognitive therapy, hypnosis and transactional analysis. Free. 12-3 p.m. Dragon’s Den, Makawao.

573-2424. Learn to Swing Dance - Lindy Hop Swing Dance lessons. Come learn the original swing dance craze that started it all! $5. 7 p.m. North Kihei

Villages Club House. 357-1231.

Friday, Jan 04 Century Luncheon - Join retired Army Colonel and local author Ann Write and the Century Club for an informational luncheon, open to the public. Write is the author of Dissent: Voices of Conscience. Tickets: $20, $15. 12 p.m. Waikapu. 757-2309.

Cinema Night - Cafe Mambo will be hosting an evening of classic and cult classic films for the 21 and older crowd. 9:30 p.m. Cafe Mambo, 30 Baldwin Ave., Paia, HI, 96779. 579-8021. Hula Classes - Hula Classes - Every Sat. Halau Kawaianuhealehua holds open hula classes for children, teen and adult wahines and kanes. gothulac@yahoo.com. 9 a.m. Jam Session - Musicians are invited to head on down to Waikapu and jam away with other players. I

Friday, January 11, Castle Theater, 7:30 pm The annual Extreme Sports Film by Warren Miller! Charge into winter with electrifying snow sports footage saturated with incredible cinematography, and Massive Air!

Tickets $12 • CALL 242-SHOW Sponsored by X92.5FM

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 3, 2008

21


DA KINECALENDAR used to live next door to the community center down there and I swear, it was like a free concert

Studio Maui, Haiku Marketplace, Suite 265, Haiku, HI, 96708. 575-9390.

every weekend. Hooray! Bring a chair and your

Tuesday, Jan 08

instrument. 3 p.m. 269-2704. Maui Film - Come for a screening of Can We Solve

Maui’s Energy Problems?, a documentary film by Lana Coryell. Free. 7 p.m. Performing Arts studio.

Sunday, Jan 06 Art of Improv - Learn to think on your feet at this improvisation workshop, taught by New York actor Erik Lieberman. $49. 1 p.m. Iao Theater, 68 N.

Market St., Wailuku, HI, 96793. 242-6969. Tantra Temple Services - Embrace the spiritual essence of all faiths with tantra, an ancient high-spiritual practice. Free. 10 a.m. 2138 Vineyard St.,

Wailuku. 244-4103. Drum Cirlcle - Bring your drum and beat away with others in the community. Free. 4 p.m.-sunset.

Kihei. 298-9022. Line Dancing - Practice your “tush push” yaíll and come on down for some line dancing by the Maui Paniolo Posse. Lessons: 6:30 p.m.; Dancing: 7 p.m.

Lahaina Cannery Mall.

Monday, Jan 07 Saving Singles - Learn about investments and meet other saving savy singles. Free. 6 p.m. Kahului. 214-5082. Flamenco for Beginners - Rosalind Modica teaches the passionate and powerful movements of exotic dance from Spain, Morocco, India Persia and other far-away lands. $18 per class. 7:30 p.m. The

BY JESSICA ARMSTRONG CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

Soul Motion - Join teacher Zuza Engler in discovering your inner realms of image, spirit and emotion through dance. Class: $18. 10:45 a.m. The Studio Maui, 810 Haiku Rd, Suite 265, Haiku, HI, 96708. 575-9390. Patents, Trademarks and Copywrites - Learn about protecting your intellectual property from John Wordin, an artist and SCORE member. Class: $10. 10 a.m. Maui Mall. rsvp 873-8247. Non-Profit Polynesian Dance - Support the kids of the Napili Kai Foundation by watching their Polynesian dance show. $10 adults, $5 kids. 5:30 p.m. 669-6271. Learn Folk Dancing - Shake it folk style with the Maui International and Israeli Folk Dance Group. Learn folk dances from around the globe. 5 p.m. 634 Alulike St., Kihei. 874-5397.

What if? - The Philosophy Club of Seabury Hall invites you to a symposium titled, “What if there is a God?” with panelists Bud Clark, MCC professor of philosophy and religion, Ram Dass, spiritual teacher, and Reverend Andrew Walmisley. 7 p.m. dining room. 572-7235.

Keiki After-School Help - Mon-Fri. Hui Malama Learning Center offers after-school homework help and classes. Call for directions and hours. 244-5911. Bisque it Baby - Mon. Sometimes, as a mom, all you might need is a little time to do something creative. Get together with other Moms and babies and paint something! Maybe a mug or a teapot, and destress. Studio fee only. 9-11 a.m., Kids and Company, Maui Mall, 877-7819. 9-11 a.m. Maui Mall. 877-7819.

tion, info and skills. 5:30 p.m., Imua Family Services, Anuenue Room, 870-0115. Story Time - Thu. Keiki story time and crafts. Free. 10 a.m. Hawaiian Village Coffee. 665-1114. Yu-Gi-Oh - Sat. Little gamester get out your cards and get ready for a Yu-Gi-Oh tournament! Free. 3 p.m. Lahaina Cannery Mall. 661-4766. Little Music Makers - Every Mon, Wed & Thu. Music Together Maui offers early childhood music programs for infants, toddlers, preschoolers and kindergarteners and the adults who love them. Come play with instruments, sing, chant and dance. Free demo classes this week. Maui Tropical Plantation, Wailuku; Island Spirit Yoga; Lahaina. 572-5603.

Lecture

Music Menagerie - Tue. A music inspired hour of dance, story time, puppetry and interactive play for little ones and their parents. $15. 9:15 a.m. The Studio Maui, 810 Haiku Rd, Suite 265, Haiku, HI, 96708. 575-9390.

Got Money? - May I have some? Before you answer that, check out this Maui group that focuses on economic topics and systems, and explores theories. Bring whatever you are reading for dialog and a readers circle. Various times. Island wide locations. 573-3250.

Ayurvedic Consultations - Margo P. Uma Gal, CAP., offers up wisdom on diet and lifestyle from over 20 years of experience as an Ayurvedic Practitioner. Walk-ins only. Free. 10:30 a.m.-1 p.m. Makawao. 572-2424.

Toddler Tuesdays - Tue. Toddlers are insane. Seriously, I can vouch that they are without rational thought. Let them do their thing and cruise with the other crazies for story time, juice, cookies and painting. $15. 10-11 a.m. Maui Mall. 877-7819.

Free Health Lectures - Matthew Hammond, an intuitive counselor with 28 years of experience in natural medicine, is giving practical health advice on topics like diet and weight loss. 10 a.m. Dragon’s Den, Makawao. 572-2424.

Dance Lessons - Open Registration to learn the cha-cha and foxtrot. $50 for three months. 6:30-9:30 p.m. Kihei Community Center. 879-0555.

Keiki Issues? - Thu. The Parent Project, a program for parents of strongwilled children. Wrestle the phone away from the child and make that call. Free. 6:30-8:30 p.m. 289-5050.

Wednesday, Jan 09

WOW! - Every Wed. Wailea on Wednesdays presents live island music, gallery receptions, artist appearances and more. 6:30-8 p.m. 897-6770 x2.

Premature Babies - Thu. Imua will hold a support group for parents of premature babies. Parent educa-

Environment Smarter than a Sand Crab? - Mon-Fri. Get free info about marine life and answers to all those pesky questions that keep you up all night. The Pacific Whale Foundation Marine Naturalists are definitely

d y e e a t k d u c I l y i o z R W sday Abs e F a r C n o i d t e o g n c o n I d e a G R W Ch with DJ F with DJ Joe El Gato ays Thursd

ys Saturda

with

LIVE MUSIC!

Joe El Gato

$7 Martinis $2 Domestic Drafts

10:00pm 10:00pm

• No Cover • Visual Enhancements • Large Dance Floor

744 Front St. • Lahaina, HI 96761 808.661.9090 www.LahainaStoreGrille.net • $5 Cover • Visual Enhancements • Large Dance Floor

10 - Closing

22

JANUARY 3, 2008

$7 Martinis $2 Domestic Drafts $7 Martinis & $2 Domestic Drafts

$7 Martinis & $2 Domestic Drafts

744 Front St. • Lahaina, HI 96761 808.661.9090 www.LahainaStoreGrille.net

DJ Boomshot

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

10-Closing

744 Front St. • Lahaina, HI 96761 808.661.9090 www.LahainaStoreGrille.net • $5 Cover • Visual Enhancements • Large Dance Floor 10-Closing

744 Front St. • Lahaina, HI 96761 808.661.9090 www.LahainaStoreGrille.net • $5 Cover • Visual Enhancements • Large Dance Floor 10-Closing


The Grid lists nightly entertainment at bars, clubs, cafes, other non-dinner serving establishments, as well as restaurants with entertainment after 9pm.

AMBROSIA 1913 S. Kihei Road, Kihei - 891-1011

Thursday 01/03

Friday 01/04

Saturday 01/05

Sunday 01/06

Monday 01/07– Wednesday 01/09

Estee Graham No cover, 9pm

A.D.D. Twins No cover, 10pm

Erin Smith Band No cover, 10pm

Sisters Grimm No cover, 9pm

MON-DJ Del Sol, 9pm; TUE-Kahala & Indio of LAWA, 10pm; WED-Crunch Pups unplugged, 9pm

CAFE MARC AUREL

First Friday Celebration

28 N. Market St. Wailuku - 244-0852

CASANOVA 1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

CHARLEY’S 142 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-9668

Temporarily

MON - Open Mic

Dr. Nat & Rio Ritmo $10, 10pm

BW, Next Generation $15, 10pm

closed

due

Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-7189

Wharf Cinema, Lahaina - 667-0908

Unknown No cover, 9pm

DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB 1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 875-9669

HARD ROCK CAFÉ 900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

to

fire

The Whale Shark No cover, 9pm

MON - Michael Moore; TUE - Jazz Night; WED - The Whale Shark, No cover, 9pm

Salsa $5, 10pm

COMPADRES COOL CAT CAFE

WED - Wild Wahine Wednesday w/DJ LX, $10, 10pm

Dave Carroll No cover, 9pm

Dave Carroll No cover, 9pm

Irish Sing Alongs w/Murray 10pm

Silky Ringo & Off Tomorrow, 10pm

TUE - Scott Baird; WED - Off Tomorrow, 9pm

Silky Ringo No cover, 9pm

HECOCKS

Sonny B No cover, 10pm

505 Front St, Lahaina - 661-8810

smarter than a fifth grader. The question is, are you?. 8 a.m.-1 p.m. Ulua Beach, Wailea. 249-8811. Save Honolua - Tue. Meeting to inform, educate and involve the community on the proposed development of Honolua Bay. 6:45 p.m. Lahaina Civic Center, 870-0052. Coastal Restoration - Fri. Habitat restoration at Waihe`e coastal dunes with Maui Coastal Land Trust. 8 a.m.-12 p.m. Waihe`e. 244-5263. Save the Forest - Sun. The Pacific Whale Foundation is hosting a group of ten volunteers to pull invasive pine trees near Hosmers Grove. Transportation is provided. Bring warm clothes, long pants and closed boots. Pick ups: 7:30 a.m., Harbor Shop, 300 Ma`alaea Rd; 8:15 a.m., Upcountry Tavares Community Center. rsvp to 856-8341. Volunteer on Vacation - Mon-Sat. Get to know Maui better by volunteering time to one of many important environmental projects. Meet local experts and learn about the history and environment of the land and get a free t-shirt from the Pacific Whale Foundation! Various dates and times. 808856-8341.

Stage Family Laundry - Fri. & Sat., Jan 4 & 5. This musical, comedy and drama about a Hawaiian familyís struggle with alcoholism was written by local playwrite Tremaine Tamayose and originally performed in 1993 for an audience of over 10,000 people statewide. 7:30 p.m. Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku, HI, 96793. 242-6969.

Sports Tai Chi - Daily. Practice the 36 movements of the “short yang” style of tai chi chuan. $10 per class. 5:30-6:30 a.m. Wailuku. 242-9327. Walk, Run, Train - Every Tue & Thu. Whether you’re a walker or a runner, you’ve got a group to train with. 5:30 p.m. Maui Mall. 877-5300. Yoga for Surfers & Paddlers - Tue. An intermediate Yoga class, great for beginners, that targets the shoulders and focuses on balance, strength & creating flexibility. $12 per class. 5:30-7 p.m. Maui Lotus Yoga, 115 Lipoa Street, Suite 201, Kihei. 874-9642. Mercedes-Benz Golf Championship - Through Sun., Jan 6. Watch the 2007 PGA champions swing away at this prestigious 2008 PGA tour season opening event. Ticket purchase and schedule info at www.kapalua.com. Plantation Course, Kapalua.

Walk, Run, Train - Every Tue & Thu. Whether youíre a walker or a runner, you’ve got a group to train with. 5:30 p.m. Maui Mall. 877-5300.

Art Plein Air Painting Show - Now-Jn=Jan 25. Plein air artists paint on location, ususally outdoors, and capture the unique moods and fleeting natural lights of a particular moment in time. See the work of dozens of Mauiís best artists. 5-8 p.m. Maui Hands Galleries, Paia. 579-9245. A Whale of a Show - Now-Feb 3. A new series of oil paintings titled “Welcome Home Whales,” by local artist Sean Rountree that depict the whales underwater at an eye-level view of the island. Free. Banyan Tree Gallery, Front Street, Lahaina, 6610111. Art Night - Fri. Stroll through dozens of art galleries in Lahaina Town. Special gallery shows, featured artists-in-action and refreshments. Free. 6:30 p.m. Front Street, Lahaina. 661-6284. Art Bistro - Sun. Local artists display their wares, from photography and painting to jewelry and sculptures. 5-10pm. Jacques Northshore Bistro, 120 Hana Hwy. Paia. 808-269-0961.

POETRY Open Mic - Every night is open mic night at Hawaiian Village Coffee. Kahana Gateway location, call 665-1114. Express Yourself - Every Mon. Open Mic Night with music, song, poetry! Free. 7 p.m., Cafe Marc Aurel, Wailuku, 244-0852. Poetry Reading - Every second Tue, read your original work, your favorite poem, or just come to be inspired. Free. 6:30 p.m., Lahaina Public Library, 662-3950. Open Mind Open Mic - Every Mon. Open Mind Open Mic with spoken word, poetry, comedy— whatever you have to say here’s your chance. 7:30 p.m., Moana Bakery, Paia, 244-9091. Open Mic - Every Saturday the Maui Media Lab hosts an open mic night for poets, muscicians and others who want to be heard. Sessions are recorded and fed to the internet. All ages are welcome. Free. 6-9 p.m., Maui Media Lab, Baldwin Ave, zumatribe@yahoo.com. Poetry Reading - Every second Thu Maui Live Poets Society hosts an open poetry reading on the West side. Free. 6:30- 9 p.m. Lahaina, 661-0517

WED - Local Boys, Jacob, Tony & Matteo; No cover, 10pm

TV/RADIO The Restless Native Speaks - Every Mon. Maui Time Weekly’s own Starr Begley talks story on the Ed and Greg show. 10 a.m., WILD 105.5 FM. Filipino Language - Mon-Fri. Fred Duldulao, Leo Agcolicol, Rey Patao and Maggie Evangelista host a Filipino language talk show. 4-6 a.m.; 7-10 p.m., KNUI 900 AM. Talk of Maui - Mon-Fri. Fred Guzman talks local, state and national poitics and issues. And every Thursday morning at 7:30, Fred grills Maui Time’s own Anthony Pignataro on the latest issues of the day. 6-8 a.m., KNUI 900 AM. Talk Story - Every Mon-Thu. Political figures take calls and answer questions on the air. 7-8 a.m., KAOI 1110 AM. Tune in and call 244-9145. Mind Body Spirit - Every Mon from 6:30-9:30 p.m., Tue from 11 a.m.-2 p.m., and Thu at noon. Liah Howard, psychic and guests. KAOI 1110 AM. Maui Talks - Every Tue. A live, public affairs, callin talk show, hosted by Nick Nikhilananda. 7 p.m. Channel 53. Call in at 873-3430 or for info call 5728787. Words of Peace - Every Wed-Thu. Prem Rawat broadcasts messages of world and inner peace. Not associated with a specific religion. Wed, 9 p.m.; Thu, 8:30 a.m. Akaku Channel 52, www.contactinfo.org, 573-3084. Conversations with Friends - Every Thu. Mary Omwake and James Jacobson interview New Thought leaders. 11 a.m., KAOI 1110 AM Smallville - Every Fri. Small Town Maui, a one-hour, weekly radio program that shares the memories and values of the small towns we love and explores how we can learn from Maui's past to create a better future. 7 a.m. KAOI, 1110 AM.

Spanish Language - Sat-Sun. Carlos David Hernandez discusses news and plays music in Spanish. 2-4 p.m., KNUI 900 AM. Japanese Language - Sun. Yumi’s long-running Japanese language show. 7-8:30 p.m., KNUI 900 AM. Save Honolua - Every Wed at 8 p.m and Thu at 7:30 a.m., AKAKU Channel 53.

KARAOKE Isana Restaurant - Daily, 9 p.m. 515 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 874-1811. Kobe Japanese Steakhouse - Fri-Sat, 9:30 p.m., 136 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 667-5555. Lulu’s - Wed, 7 p.m., 1941 S. Kihei Rd., 879-9944. Sansei - Thu-Fri, 10 p.m., 600 Office Road, Kapalua, 669-6286; Thu-Sat, 10 p.m. Kihei Town Center, 879-0004. Tiffany’s - Daily, 9:30 p.m., 1424 L. Main St., Wailuku, 249-0052. Unisan - Thu-Sat, 9:30 p.m., 2102 Vineyard St., Wailuku, 244-4500.

DINNER MUSIC WEST MAUI BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria - Wed-Fri, John Kane; Sat, Harry Troupe; Sun, Greg DiPiazza; Mon, Tue, Marvin Tevaga. All sets 7:30-9:30 p.m. 730 Front St., Lahaina, 661-0700.

Call In - Every Fri. Political and public affairs, call-in talk show with Teri Lawrence. 12-1 p.m. KAOI 1110 AM Call in 242-7800. Uncle Charlie’s Corner - Sat. Kahu Charles Kauluwehi Maxwell, Sr. talks story. 6-10 a.m., KNUI 900 AM. Free Zone/ Zona Libre - Every other Sat. A multilingual, multi-cultural radio program featuring world music, fresh thought, live interviews with local and international artists and NO commercial breaks. 6-10 a.m. Mana’o Radio 91.5 FM. Maui Matters - Sat-Sun. Pacific Radio Group News Director Wendy Osher discusses local issues. 1-2 p.m., KNUI 900 AM.

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 3, 2008

23


The Grid lists nightly entertainment at bars, clubs, cafes, other non-dinner serving establishments, as well as restaurants with entertainment after 9pm.

HENRY’S BAR & GRILL 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-2849

Thursday 01/03

Friday 01/04

Saturday 01/05

Tom Cherry No cover, 9pm

Crunch Pups No cover, 9pm

Cheryl Rae No cover, 9pm

DJ El Gato $10, 10pm

DJ Music No cover, 10pm

Vince Esquire

Kenny Roberts No cover

El Vato Loco No cover

Kenny Roberts

Cheryl Rae $5, 10pm

Crunch Pups Duo

JACQUES 120 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8844

KAHALE’S BEACH CLUB 36 Keala Pl., Kihei - 875-7711

KAHULUI ALE HOUSE 355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811

Dickenson St., Lahaina - 661–7082

LOBBY LOUNGE Four Seasons Resort, Wailea - 874-8000

Gina Martinelli No cover, 9pm

Jared No cover

WED - Chico & Da Kine; No cover MON - DJ Boomshot, No cover, 10pm, WED -Maui Magic, $5, 10pm

Sonny B No cover, 9pm

LAHAINA COOLERS

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891–8010

Monday 01/07– Wednesday 01/09

Derick Sebastian No cover, 10pm

KIMOS

LIFE’S A BEACH

Sunday 01/06

Rampage 9pm

Black Square 9pm

Luke 808 9pm

Vince Esquire 9pm

MON - Special Guest; TUE - Open Mic; WED - Special Guest, No cover, 10pm

Anastasia & Guest, No cover, 9-11:30pm

Jazz w/Sal Godinez & Marcus Johnson, No cover, 9-11:30pm

Anastasia & Guest No cover, 9-11:30pm

Dr Nat No cover, 9-11:30pm

MON- Anastasia & Guest, TUE-Sal Godinez & Marcus Johnson, WED- Reiko Fukino & Guest, All 9-11:30pm

Cheeseburger In Paradise - Mon, Tue, Scotty Rotten; Wed, Fri, Harry Troupe; Thu, Sat, Sun, Brooks McGuire. All sets 4:30-10:30 p.m. 811 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4855.

South Shore Tiki Lounge - Thu, Sun, Tue, Tony; Fri, Eclipse; Sat, Erin Smith; Mon, Kanoa; Wed, Kenny Roberts. All sets 4-6 p.m. 1913 Kihei Rd., Kihei Kalama Village, 874-6444.

Ohana Bar & Grill - Wed, Thu, Live music; Fri,

■ GRAND WAILEA RESORT HOTEL & SPA

Patrick Major; Sun, Wayne and Friends; Mon, Tue,

3850 Wailea Alanui, 875-1234

Ernest Pua`a. All sets 5:30-9:30 p.m. Torch lighting

Botero Bar - Wed, 5:30-9:30 p.m., Live music.

Compadres - Tue, 4 p.m., Live music. Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-7189.

Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Café - Sun, Mon, Brittany; Wed, Sat, Merv Oana Thu; Fri Margie; Tue Jamie Lawrence. All sets 6-10 p.m. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983.

■ KA`ANAPALI BEACH HOTEL Kupanaha - Nightly, Hula show, 6:30-7:30 p.m.

4100 Wailea Alanui, 875-4100

Tradewinds Poolside Cafe - Thu, Kawika Lum Ho; Fri, Kaleo Cullen; Sat, Louise Lambert; Sun, Mon, Kenny Roberts; Tue, Ramen & Cora; Wed, Keoki Ruiz. All sets 6-9 p.m. The Maui Coast Hotel, 2259 S. Kihei Rd., 874-6284.

Tiki Courtyard - Nightly, Alanui with Uncle Rudi;

Lobby Bar - Nightly, 5:30-9:30 p.m., Live music.

Sun, Hula show. All sets 6:30 p.m.

■ THE SHOPS AT WAILEA

Cool Cat Cafe - Thu, Erin Smith; Fri, Sat, Dave Carroll; Sun, Wed, Whale Sharks; Mon, Mickie Moore; Tue, Jazz; . all sets 7:30-10 p.m. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 667-0908. Hula Grill - (Early sets) Wed, Thu, Fri, Ernest Pua’a; Sat, Sun, Mon, Kawika Lum Ho; Tue, Jarret Roback. Early sets 3-5 p.m. (Followed by) Thu, Braddah Brian & Roy; Fri, Brian, Roy & Kawika;. Sat, “TBA”; Sun, Ryan Tanaka & Friends; Mon,“TBA”; Tue, Albert & Roy; Wed, An Den. Late sets 7-9:30 p.m. 2435 Ka`anapali Parkway, Building P, 667-6636. Java Jazz/Soup Nutz - Mon-Sat, Acoustic music. All sets 7 p.m. 3350 Lower Honoapi`ilani Rd., Honokowai, 667-0787. Kimo’s - Mon- Wed, Sat, Sun, Sam Ahia. Fri, deAquino Bradaz. All sets 6:30-8:30 p.m. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4811. Leilani’s On The Beach - Fri, Scott Baird;. Sat, JD and Harry; Sun, Kilohana. All sets 2:30-5 p.m. 2435 Ka`anapali Pkwy, Building J, 661-4495. Moose McGillycuddy’s, Lahaina - Fri, Llayne & Pro Ed; Sat, Mark & Mike. All sets 6-9 p.m. 844 Front St., 667-7758. Mulligan’s on the Wharf - Fri, AnRil. All sets 7 p.m. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 661-8881. Pioneer Inn - Thu, Ah-Tim Eleniki; Tue, Captain Billy Bones; Wed, Greg Di Piazza. All sets 6-8 p.m. 658 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-3636. Sea House Restaurant - Thu, Albert Kaina and Kincade Basques; Fri, Sat, Mon, Tue, Kincade Basques; Sun, Andrew; Wed, Albert Kaina. All sets 6:30 or 7-9 p.m. Napili Kai Beach Resort, 5900 Honoapi`ilani Rd., Napili, 669-1500.

CENTRAL MAUI

24

JANUARY 3, 2008

5900 Honoapi`ilani Hwy, Napili, 669-1500

Basques; Sun, Kapule Paoa; Wed, Albert Kaina. All sets 7-9 p.m.

Café Marc Aurel - Tue, Live Music; Mon, Open Mic Night. 7:30 p.m. 28 N. Market St., Wailuku, 244-0852.

Royal Ocean Terrace - Thu, Fri, Sat, Live

Main Street Bistro - Th-Fri, Rhythm & Blues with Freedom. 5-7:30 p.m.. 2051 Main St., Wailuku, 2446816. Sushi Go - Wed, Live music. 4-8 p.m. Queen Ka`ahumanu Center, Kahului, 877-8744.

■ ROYAL LAHAINA RESORT

2780 Keka`a Dr., Ka`anapali, 661-3611

Hana Hou Cafe - Thu, Haiku Hillbillys; Wed, Tom Conway and Randall Rospond. Sat, Live music. All sets 6-9 p.m. 810 Haiku Rd, Haiku Cannery, 5752661. Jacque’s - Mon, Live Jazz. 5 p.m. 120 Hana Hwy, Paia, 579-8844. Livewire Cafe - Tue, Green Room Blue; Wed, Eddie Float; Sat, Joshua. All sets 7:30-9:30 p.m. 137 Hana Hwy, Paia, 579-6009. Moana Cafe & Bakery - Sat, Live jazz music with Mark Johnstone & Friends, 11 a.m.-3 p.m. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9999.

RESORT SHOWS WEST MAUI ■ HYATT REGENCY MAUI RESORT & SPA

p.m., Strolling Hawaiian Duo. ■ THE FAIRMONT KEA LANI MAUI

3750 Wailea Alanui East Wing - Wed, 6:30-8 p.m., Marti Kluth. Lower Courtyard - Wed, 6:30-8 p.m., Jamie Lawerence and Friends. ■ WAILEA MARRIOTT

3700 Wailea Alanui, 879-1922 p.m.

Hawaiian. 6-8 p.m. ■ SHERATON MAUI HOTEL

2605 Ka`anapali Pkwy, 661-0031

Mele Mele Lounge - Nighly, Live music. 9-11 p.m. ■ RENAISSANCE WAILEA BEACH RESORT

3550 Wailea Alanui, 879-4900 Lagoon Bar - Nightly, Hula dancing during sets. Thu, Mon, Tue, Bobby and Ralph; Fri, Ralph and Allan; Sat, Sun, Fausto and Kawaika; Wed, Nathan and

Sunset Terrace - Wed, Thu, Bobby Krueger; Fri, Mahalo Greg; Sat, Rama Camarillo; Sun, Mondo Kane; Mon, Tue, Lono. All sets 6-9 p.m.

ceremony at sunset nightly.

■ MAUI PRINCE HOTEL

■ THE WESTIN MAUI HOTEL

5400 Makena Alanui, 874-1111

2365 Kaanapali Parkway, 667-2525

Molokini Lounge - (Very early sets) Fri, Mon,

Ono Bar & Grille - Thu, Sat, Steve Sargenti; Fri, Larry Golis; Sun, Margie Heart; Mon, Ernest Puaa; Tue, Brian Haia; Wed, Pam Peterson. Tue-Sun shows, 6-9 p.m. Mon, 5:30-9 p.m.

Wed, Mele `Ohana Duo. Very early sets 9 a.m-1 p.m. (Followed by) Thu, Sat, Sun, Tue, Ron Kuala’au; Fri, Mon, Wed, Mele `Ohana Duo. Early sets 6 p.m. (Followed by) Thu, Fri, Sat, Mon, Tue, Wed, Mele `Ohana Duo. Late sets 8:30-10:30 p.m.

Tropica - (Early sets) Thu, Wed, Brian Haia; Fri, Sat,

EAST MAUI

Mon, Marvin Tevaga; Sun, Josh Kahula; Tue, Ernest Pua`a. Early sets 3-6 p.m. (Followed by) Thu, Fri, Wed,

■ HOTEL HANA-MAUI

Benny Uyetake; Sat, Tue, Mitch Kepa; Sun, Steve

Hana, 248-8211

Sargenti; Mon, Josh Kahula. Late sets 6-9 p.m.

SOUTH MAUI

Paniolo Lounge - Thu-Sun, Live music. 6:309:30 p.m.

■ FOUR SEASONS RESORT WAILEA

Main Dining Room - Thu, Sun, Hula dancing.

3900 Wailea Alanui, 874-8000

7:30-8:15 p.m.

Lobby Lounge - (Early sets) Thu, Steve Repollo and Alan Villeran; Sat, Mon, Island Style Trio with hula dancing. Early sets 5:30-7:30 p.m. (Followed by) Thu,

Weeping Banyan Lounge - Nightly, Live music.

Sal Godinez and Marcus Johnson; Fri, Clay

All sets 6:30-9:30 p.m. Torch lighting ceremony night-

Mortensen and George Tavoularis; Sat, Mon, Nils

ly.

and Anastasia; Sun, Pam Peterson and Rudy Baria;

■ KAANAPALI BEACH CLUB

Wed, Clay Mortensen and Gilbert Emata. Late sets

104 Ka`anapali Shores, Lahaina, 661-2000

8:30-11:30 p.m. Torchlighting ceremony nightly.

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

Humuhumunukunukuapua`a - Nightly, 5:30

Kumu Bar & Grill - Nightly, Hula dancing. 6-9

Ralph. All sets 6-8 p.m. Torchlighting and cliff diving

UPCOUNTRY MAUI

200 Nohea Kai Dr, Lahaina, 661-1234

Mulligan’s on the Blue - Sat, Sun, Celtic Tigers; Mon, Gypsy Pacific; All sets 7 p.m. 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874-1131.

■ NAPILI KAI BEACH RESORT

AK’s Cafe - Fri, Ron Kuala’au. 6:15 p.m. , Sat Tarvin Makai 6:15 p.m.1237 L. Main St, Wailuku, 2448774.

Longhi’s - Sat, acustic music. 10:30-11 p.m. 3750 Wailea Alanui Dr., 891-8883

Moose McGillycuddy’s, Kihei - Fri, Erin Smith; Sat, Anuhea; All sets 5:30-7:30 p.m. 2511 S. Kihei Rd., 891-8600.

2525 Ka`anapali Pkwy, 661-0011

Thu, Kincaid and Albert; Fri, Sat, Mon, Tue, Kincaid

SOUTH MAUI

Ma`alaea Grill - Thu, Fri, Sat, Benoit Jazz Works. All sets 6:30-9 p.m. Maalaea Harbor, 243-2206.

ceremony nightly.

Send your listings and photos for the Da Kine Calendar to Jessica Armstrong at calendar@mauitime.com or fax (808) 244-0446


The Grid lists nightly entertainment at bars, clubs, cafes, other non-dinner serving establishments, as well as restaurants with entertainment after 9pm.

Thursday 01/03 LONGHIâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S 1945 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-9944

Saturday 01/05

Sunday 01/06

Monday 01/07â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Wednesday 01/09

Crazy Fingers 9:30pm

888 Front St., Lahaina - 667-2288

LULUâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S

Friday 01/04

Neto Latin Salsa No cover, 9pm

The Willyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s & DJ Shaggy No cover, 9pm

All Access & DJ Shaggy No cover, 10pm

WED - Karaoke, 9pm

MAUI BREWING CO.

WED - Open Mic Night, 10:30pm

4405 Honoapi`ilani Hwy., Kahana - 669-3474

MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S

DJ Jo Jo No cover, 9pm

DJ J-Woo No cover, 9pm

Guitar Hero No cover, 9pm

DJ Mackie Mac No cover, 9pm

DJ Mackie Mac No cover, 9pm

DJ Mello Yello No cover, 9pm

Live Music No cover, 9pm

MON - DJ Mello Yello, 9pm; TUE DJ Mackie Mac, 9pm, WED - DJ Mellow Yellow, 9pm

Cyrus C

Haiku Hillbillys No cover

The Sisters Grimm No cover, 10pm

Celtic Tigers

MON - Gypsy Pacific; TUE - Randall Rospond; WED Steve Sargenti

Wee Dâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ono No cover, 10pm

Silky Ringo No cover, 10pm

Hazmatt No cover, 10pm

Silky Ringo No cover, 10pm

MON - Junior Guys, No cover 10pm; TUE - Two Dimes & a Nickel; No cover, 10pm; WED - Open Mic

DJ El Gato $5, 10pm

DJ Boomshot $5, 10pm

DJ El Gato $5, 10pm

Lounge & Beats No cover, 10pm

MON & TUE - Lounge & Beats, No cover, 10pm; WED Live Music, $5, 10pm

Kanoa of Gomega No cover, 10pm

MON - DJ Del Sol, DJ JR, 10pm; TUE - DJ Boomshot, No cover, 10pm; WED - ADD Twins, No cover, 10pm

DJ Shark in da Water, No cover, 9:30pm

TUE - The New Project, $5, 10pm; WED - DJ Del Sol, No cover, 9:30pm

2511 S. Kihei Rd., 891-8600

MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S 844 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7758

MULLIGANâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S ON THE BLUE 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea - 874-1131

MULLIGANâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S AT THE WHARF Cinema Center, Lahaina - 661-8881

OYSTER BAR 744 Front St., Lahaina - 661-9090

PACIFICâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;O

Live Jazz No cover, 9pm

505 Front St., Lahaina - 667-4341

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-6444

DJ Durty No cover, 10pm

Freaky Friday w/DJ Sonny No cover, 10pm

DJ Magnetic, DJ JP No cover, 10pm DJ Blast, $15, 9:30pm

SPATS TRATTORIA Hyatt Regency, Ka`anapali - 667-4727

Crunch Pups No cover, 9:30

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR 2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-0602

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR

Crazy Fingers $3, 9pm

1127 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-1380

TIP-UPS TAVERN 1279 S. Kihei Road, Kihei - 874-9299

Kilohana No cover, 10pm

Lawa $5, 10pm

Ohana Groove No cover, 10pm

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25


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26

JANUARY 3, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

893-8625


E M P L O Y M E N T JOIN OUR FIVE-STAR TEAM! RELIEF MANAGER CASHIERS FT ASS’T HD. MEATCUTTER F/T FISH CUTTER CLERKS: PRODUCE COURTESY • GROCERY

PHOTOGRAPHERS Maui's premier visual services provider needs photographers to work 2 to 3 nights at the most popular luaus on Maui. Starting salary @$9.50/hr. plus sales commission. An outgoing enthusiastic personality and reliable transportation is a must. Apply in person at:

Capturing the Spirit of Aloha Media Systems, Inc. 727 Waine'e St. Suite 201 Lahaina, Maui, HI 96761 808-667-2271 www.msimaui.com

FT & PT positions. Customer service oriented individuals needed for our Honokowai Store in Maui. Excellent benefits. Flexible shifts available. An Equal Opportunity Employer DATA ENTRY PROCESSORS NEEDED! Earn $3,500-$5,000 Weekly Working From Home! Guaranteed Paychecks! No Experience Necessary! Positions Available Today! Register Online Now! http://www.BigPayWork.com (AAN CAN) GOVERNMENT JOBS Earn Up to $12 to $48/Hour. Full Benefits, Paid Training. Homeland Security, Law Enforcement, Accounting/Finance, Clerical, Administrative, Wildlife/Park Service, More! 1-800-320-9353 x.2001. (AAN CAN) ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER The Association of Alternative Newsweeklies (members include papers like the one you’re holding in your hand) is looking for an experienced account executive or sales manager to sell advertising, as well as oversee marketing and operations for its successful national classified advertising network. You must be able to work independently in our small, non-corporate DC office and know your way around spreadsheets, databases and the web. Significant income potential and excellent health, dental, vacation benefits and IRA. Relocation expenses paid. Resume, cover letter and salary expectations no later than Friday, Jan. 11 to rkarpel at aan.org or AAN, 1250 Eye Street NW, Ste. 804, Washington, DC 20005. (AAN CAN) $ MODELS WANTED $ For magazine print work. $250$900. Ages 18 to 35. 573-3712 OUTDOOR YOUTH COUNSELOR Do you love the outdoors and helping troubled teens? Immediate openings at Eckerd outdoor therapeutic programs in NC, TN, GA, FL, VT, NH and RI. Year-round residential position, free room/board, competitive salary/benefits. Info and application: http://www.eckerdyouth.org. Or fax resume to Career Advisor/AN, 727-442-5911. EOE/DFWP (AAN CAN)

BARTENDERS NEEDED Looking for part/full time bartenders. Several positions available.No experience required.With hourly wages and tips make up to $300 per shift. Call(800)806-0082 ext.200.(AAN CAN)

Maui Brewing Co. in Kahana is hiring experienced line cooks. Call Aaron 214-4751

Freeman Guards, Inc. A Destination & Event Management Company seeks bright & talented

OFFICE MANAGER Must have minimum of five years administrative experience & type 55-65 wpm. Excellent writing, editing, communication, customer service & organizational skills required. Advanced MS Word & Intermediate Excel required. Prefer experience in the Hospitality Industry. Bachelor’s Degree highly desirable. Competitive salary with full-time benefits package & 401K. Send resume and cover letter to hr@hawaiimeetings.com

Immediate hires needed Lahaina F/T-P/T, & F/T Manager Apply at: 210 Imi Kala St., Ste. 4 Wailuku Industrial Call 244-7052

RUSTY HARPOON Oceanfront on Kaanapali Beach Busy season is here!! BARTENDERS*BUSSERS*FOOD RUNNERS*PREP COOK*LINE COOK*BISTRO COOK*SOUS CHEF Apply within 8 to 5 pm -No phone calls please-

PRODUCTION MANAGER for wholesale operation

EVENT AND CONVENTION STAFF

VIBE MOVEMENT ART STUDIO in Paia is looking for Teachers. Dance, Martial Arts, Yoga, Hula or any type of movement classes. Call 280-7975

Friendly, responsible people with own transportation for seasonal programs starting in January. Days and evenings.

Beach Bums Bar & Grill

Immediately Hiring

TOP PAY! Send resumes to: Fax: 808-244-7036 or hr@hawaiimeetings.com Immediately

Opening Soon in Maalaea Harbor Shops and Restaurants (Old Blue Marlin)

Now accepting applications for all positions. Interviews Wednesday – Saturday 10- 4. 300 Maalaea Rd.

We are an Equal Opportunity Employer. M/F/D/V

DELIVERY/WAREHOUSE person, F/T Mon.-Fri. Lift up to 100 lbs. Valid Driver’s Lic./clear abstract. Delivery & set up of furniture. Excellent benefits, medical/dental. MOORE INTERIORS

661-0046 Akaku

Maui Community Television is seeking

MEDIA ACCESS ASSOCIATES We’re filling two (2) PT positions. Understanding of Databases, Customer and/or Front Desk Service Experience, Cash Handling and General Office Skills required. Knowledge of television equipment and production preferred, but we will train qualified and enthusiastic candidates. This is an entry-level position with growth potential. Akaku is a team-oriented environment, with great Benefits and Educational Opportunities, that empowers the community with access to media. Must believe strongly in Freedom of Speech. Email resume to linda@akaku.org

PASTRY CHEF / BAKER for new restaurant opening soon. Salary plus benefits Apply at 810 Kokomo Rd. Haiku Town Center or call 573-8056

SALES MANAGEMENT TRAINEE Looking for enthusiastic individuals to enter our fastpaced business as a Sales Management Trainee on Oahu, Maui and Kona. We will reward your dedication and sales ability with great career opportunity. BS/BA preferred, satisfactory abstract, strong communication skills. Apply Online: www.enterprise.com For any questions, email lei.a.ikeda@erac.com

Seeking qualified Auto Tech & Helper for busy Kula shop. Call 250-2698

BB Trucking & Storage

ALL TYPE DRIVERS

Driver

Apply at: 320 Hoohana St., Bay 13-16, Kahului

CDL-B

877-3966

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Eskimo Candy NOW HIRING! • District Sales Rep ($32K Base salary + Comission) • Retail Counter Salespersons M-F, good pay & benefits. Call 879-5686 for appointment or email: eskimo@maui.net or fax: 874-0504

AUTO MECHANIC F/T ASE & MECHANIC HELPER Mechanic needed for busy repair shop. Excellent wages & benefits based upon experience. Great career opportunity. ERNIE'S KWIK LUBE & AUTO REPAIR

Call 879-3643 for interview

FULL BENEFITS Apply in person

300 Ohukai Road 2AM-NOON

Buzz’s Wharf SERVERS BUSHELP DISHWASHER HOST/HOSTESS COOK

BRANCH OUT JECO TREE SERVICE AIR CONDITIONING

Apply in person daily betw. 10:30 to 1 pm & 3 to 5 pm.

is seeking EXPERIENCED A/C TECH Pay based on experience. Good benefits. Fax resume to 808-244-0216

DINA’S SANDWITCH FT KITCHEN HELP

Tree Trimmers & Ground Help. F/T. No Drugs. Driver’s License Req. Call 572-1636

DRIVER/STOCKER w/Produce Experience

Must have clean traffic abstract, able to get certified for harbor freight pickups, able to lift 50 lbs. Work schedule Monday-Friday11 am-7 pm. Great benefits & work environment. Apply in person Mana Foods 49 Baldwin Ave, Paia or Fax resume: 579-9464

Orthodontic Clinician needed. Dental exper a plus, but will train. FT/401k/med. Fax resume to 873-8399

A GREAT OPPORTUNITY For a motivated individual! Excellent wages & benefits. The Indich Collection, Hawaiian Rugs: Sales and Deliveries. Heavy lifting required. Clean driving abstract a plus.

Call Tammy - 877-7200

PLACING AN EMPLOYMENT AD IS EASY! CALL 264-8039

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

Includes Benefits 145 N. Kihei Rd. 879-3262 Ka‘anapali Bar and Grill located at the Ka‘anapali Resort Golf Course seeking Wait Help Please respond to Rene at 808-342-3595

CLASSIFIEDS CONTINUED ON P. 29

JANUARY 3, 2008

27


Now Hiring Full-Time & Part-Time: Transportation Security Officers Officers provide security and protection for air travelers, airports and aircraft.

Full-Time (Kahului): Starting at $35,754 per year Plus Benefits Part-Time (Kahului): Starting at $17.13 per hour Plus Benefits (Includes 25% Cost of Living Allowance and 25% Retention Pay)

Full-Time (Lanai): Starting at $29,795 per year Plus Benefits Part-Time (Lanai): Starting at $14.28 per hour Plus Benefits (Includes 25% Cost of Living Allowance) TSA will pay the maximum government contribution for health benefits under the TSA Health Benefit Incentive for part-time TSOs. All part-time TSOs will pay the same lower cost for federal health benefits as full-time employees. Minimum Requirements: U.S. Citizenship or U.S. National • High school diploma, GED or equivalent, or one year of security or aviation screening experience • English proficiency • Pre-employment medical evaluation • Pass a background/credit check

Please apply online at: www.tsajobs.com 1-800-887-1895 • TTY: 1-800-887-5506 TSA is an Equal Opportunity Employer.

28

JANUARY 3, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY


POST OFFICE JOBS AVAILABLE. Avg. Pay $20/hour or $57K Annually including Federal Benefits TRUCKS, PENIS ENLARGEMENT and OT. Paid Training, MOTORCYCLES, Vacations. PT/FT. 1-866-616-7019 APPROVED medical vacuum pumps, VIAGRA, Testosterone, RVS USWA(AAN CAN) Cialis. Gain 1”-3” permanently. Free Brochures, se habla espanol SE BUSCAN! 619-294-7777, 24/7, Distribuidores activos, comprohttp://www.getbiggertoday.com metidos y con ganas de seguir (AAN CAN) siendo parte de la familia SCOOTERS Omnilife! Deseen ganar $400 05 Honda Metro AUTO $1,695 dlls o mas. Llama ya 808-46392 Yamaha Jog FAST $1,295 8461 Solo Espanol WRITERS WANTED 03 Honda Elite FUN $1,000 The Academy for Alternative MAKE $150/HOUR MOTORCYCLES Get paid cash for your opinion! Journalism, established by papers 06 Honda Big Ruckus 250 $4,495 Earn $5 to $75 to fill out simple like this one to promote diversity in 04 Honda Goldwing $11,999 surveys online. Start NOW! the alternative press, seeks talenthttp://www.paidchoice.com (AAN ed journalists and students (col97 Yamaha XV535 $1,495 lege seniors and up) for a paid CAN) 98 Honda Valkrie $4,995 summer writing program at HELP WANTED Northwestern University’s Medill DIRT BIKE 04 Honda CR250R $2,795 Earn Extra income assembling CD School of Journalism. The eightcases from Home. Start week program (June 22 - August 05 Gas Gas Trails 50CC $895 Immediately. No Experience 17, 2008) aims to recruit talented 02 Honda XR70 $1,095 Necessary. 1-800-405-7619 candidates from diverse back07 Yamaha YZ450F $4,295 ext.150 http://www.easywork- grounds and train them in alt01 Honda CR80 $1,695 greatpay.com (AAN CAN) weekly style feature writing. Ten participants will be chosen and ON paid $3,000 plus housing and travAA NATIONAL 06/07 NEW MODELS SANDWICH FRANCHISE el allowances. For information and an application visit Established 5 years, exceptionhttp://aaj.aan.org. You may also ally clean, $89,000 down, long 1161 Lower Main St., Wailuku email us at altacademy@northlease. Quizno’s Make offer! western.edu. Applications must be Michael Capuano, R(S) postmarked by February 8, 2008. 808-280-0394 Northwestern University is an equal opportunity educator and employer. (AAN CAN) AUTOMOTIVE

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FREE AND ANONYMOUS HIV TESTING OFFERED THROUGH YOUR HAWAII DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH Kihei-Mondays at Keolahou Church 11am-2pm. Wailuku-Monday thru Tursday at Wailuku Health Center 8:30 am-12pm. Paia-Wednesdays at Paia Community Center 12:30pm-3:00pm. LahainaThursdays at Lahaina Comprehensive Health Center 9am-12pm. Results returned in 2 wks. Sponsored by State Dept. of Health, for more info call 984-2129 ALOHA VALUED READERS We would like to let our readers know that we try to screen most of our ads. We read back the ad copy to ensure that it is the correct information that advertisers want. If you see the acronym (AAN CAN) that ad is a national ad and was not submitted directly to us. If you have a question directly concerning AAN CAN, please check out aancan.org

RESTLESSNATIVE

BY STARR BEGLEY STARR@MAUITIME.COM

Is Bigger Better? Depending on whom I talk to, the statement “I’ve been to the mainland once” is either an embarrassing confession or a badge of local honor. However it’s viewed, it’s the truth. I’ve only been to the mainland once and that was 15 years ago. My parents took my brother and I to Disneyland. We stayed at The Saga Inn across the street (it was more like a highway, but I’m not too sure if that’s the correct term) and I was completely entranced by the absolute enormity of it all. The trip was fun, though I freaked out and almost fainted in the wax museum. If you didn’t know this already, wax museums are really weird places. Over the past decade and a half, I’ve had a number of opportunities to go back to the mainland. When I was 19 my best friend was moving to the West Coast to go and do hippie type things that involved a lot of hemp yarn and patchouli oil. I passed. When I was in my early 20s, my boyfriend’s family moved to Oregon and we planned on following them over to take advantage of the lower cost of living, but we never made it. We got pregnant and decided to stay in Hawai‘i where I could raise a baby close to my family. I even had a Texan-transplant boyfriend who asked me to move to China with him. I thought he was either totally insane or full of shit. He made the move, leaving me behind. He’s been there for 10 years, but I’m still waiting for my letter with Chinese postage stamps. I’ve always blamed being stuck in Hawai‘i on financial difficulties. But the more I think about it, the more I realize that money’s just a decoy for the real issue: I’m scared. The mainland is big–bigger than I can feasibly imagine. When I try to imagine, I get the same weird sensation you get when you start contemplating infinity. The mainland U.S. holds 3,794,083 square miles. Maui? Just 729. I was going to do the math, but I think it’ll suffice to say that Maui is A LOT smaller than the mainland. In the words of a colleague who grew up on the mainland, “It’s big.” It boggles my mind when I try to imagine just how big the word “big” is. Big like the Big Island big or big like Haleakala? Are the malls twice the size of the Queen Ka‘ahumanu Center or three times the size of Ala Moana? What also scares me is that the mainland is so humongous, it could be very easy to get lost in. And that would suck. Here on Maui, I know that there’s only so far I can go before hitting a familiar beach with familiar faces. It can be a little suffocating, but at least I feel safe. In a few weeks, I’ll be getting on a plane and heading to San Francisco to attend a newspaper conference. I’m really excited about it, but I’m already experiencing moth-like fluttering in my stomach. I can’t use the money excuse because my bosses bought my ticket. I tried the “I’m not sure if I can leave my family” route, which totally failed because my husband looked at me like I was a nut job for even considering passing on the opportunity. “Won’t you guys miss me?” I asked. “We’ll be fine,” he said. “But, what if…” “We’ll be fine,” he said again. I know he was trying to put me at ease, but some co-dependent part of me really wanted him to beg me not to leave him to fend for himself with the kids. Part of me wanted him to lament about how much he’ll miss me. Guess I’ve always found it easier to be brave when other people are blubbering.

Starr Begley is now obsessed with bread making and is planning on bringing back authentic San Francisco sourdough starter.

MTW

CLASSIFIEDS CONTINUED ON P. 30

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 3, 2008

29


SIGNLANGUAGE

CAERIEL CRESTIN SIGN.LANGUAGE.ASTROLOGY@GMAIL.COM

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19) Some rules are made to be bent or broken—but only by experts. No rule is sacrosanct; if you’re good enough, you can swim against the current and still end up getting farther faster than those who choose to go with the flow. This requires insane amounts of cunning, charm, and self-knowledge, as well as the will to knowingly break the rules. You’ve got all that. This week’s a good week to exercise it, should you choose to. You’ll probably get to your destination either way—but this way will be quicker, and a whole lot more fun.

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18) You don’t need your cup of coffee in the morning, no matter how often you claim it’s so. Yes, it greatly facilitates you having a great morning but the truth is you could go without it (albeit miserably) if you had to, just as you could also suffer through not having most of the other things you profess to require. What do you truly need? Aren’t your other supposed necessities just strong preferences? At least one thing you actually can’t survive without, you regard (bizarrely) as an unnecessary frill, and at least five of the things you think you can’t live without aren’t even that good for you. This is a good week to figure out just what’s what and change your priorities accordingly.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20) I recently went to a sex machine museum, whose exhibits ranged from charmingly titillating (an adorable hand-cranked vibrator) to extremely grotesque (dildos so shockingly large they could also be found in a museum of torture devices). In other words, you’re not as weird as you think, whether we’re talking about your sexuality or any of your other qualities. There’s always someone stranger than you, and everyone else is odder than you know. Proudly own what you are. Don’t bother shamefully hiding your dildo; your neighbor’s got a bigger one, and anyway, nobody cares.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19) Rams suck at staying truly depressed. Provided you haven’t done something ridiculously dramatic (like killing yourself), you usually bounce out of your misery swiftly. You’re simply not heavy enough to get stuck in the muck for long. There will be many more swamps of sorrows to slog through after this one. Don’t worry—you’ll get through them just like you’ll get through this one: by staying calm and being patient. As long as you don’t struggle so much that you sink in over your head, you’ll be back on solid ground before you know it.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20) Consider ignorance; it might just be the better option. If you don’t get where I’m coming from, here’s an example: city dwellers rarely know much about their neighbors. They’ll spend years less than 10 feet from another person and still know virtually nothing about them, because of that thin wall separating them. I believe this lack of knowledge helps make the wall feel a little thicker, and helps a flimsy, crappy, overpriced apartment feel like a safe haven. In this case, too, not knowing might help you feel better. Since finding out the truth won’t help you in any way, shape, or form, I ask you: why bother?

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20) I generally dislike gimmicks but sometimes they’re simply the easiest, fastest, and (most importantly) most effective way to achieve your goal; in this case, getting someone’s attention. Sure, you could put in the time, and hope that eventually they’ll notice you for your quiet, upstanding qualities, subtle sense of humor, etc. That might work out for you. But let’s be real here: it probably won’t, at least not on any tolerable time table. I’m not talking about donning a clown nose or a funny hat (though I wouldn’t rule out those options). Still, using something flashy to draw someone’s attention to your finer qualities might not be a bad idea.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22) Your self-image as righteous warrior has become a bit tarnished. You raced to war with passion in your heart and what you thought was impregnable emotional armor, and discovered that your passion was misguided and your protective shell more fragile than you believed. Now, you’re understandably hesistant to storm into battle again. What if, after all, you’re wrong this time, too? What if your armor falls to pieces? I sympathize with and understand your concerns, but I’m here to dismiss them: you’re not wrong and your armor will hold. Now go fight the good fight.

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22) Want a little bitter with your sweet? No? Tough shit. If I were you, I’d get used to the taste. You’ll probably never love it (unless you’re unusually masochistic), but you could still learn to appreciate how it makes the sweet stuff that much more delicious. Take your bitter pill this week and remember to keep eating afterwards; dessert will be served. You’ll find the bad taste becomes not so bad, after a while, and you won’t dread it so much. And please, don’t forget to savor every drop of sweetness that comes your way. That, after all, is what this is all about.

REAL ESTATE

Yokis

FOR SALE BANK FORECLOSURES Homes from $10,000! 1-3 bedroom available! HUD, Repos, REO, etc. These homes must sell! For Listings Call 1-800-425-1620 ext. 3241. (AAN CAN) UPCOUNTRY Two Upcountry side-by-side half acre double building lots with three County water-meters and ocean views. Currently eligible to build 4 houses and 2 ohanas. $798,000 Josh Jerman, Broker (808) 2832222 Century 21 All Islands WAILUKU Lowest priced 3bd/2ba home in Kehalani subdivision. Single level home on a large, corner lot with a fenced back yard and West Maui Mountain ocean views. $549,000 Josh Jerman, Broker (808) 2832222 Century 21 All Islands

APARTMENTS FOR RENT LARGE STUDIO APARTMENT Completely remodeled bath, kitchen & living space. Fully furnished with all new furniture, central a/c, washer/dryer, lani, garage. Utilities and cable t.v. included. Call 264-0950

SHARED HOUSING, ROOMMATES

• Custom Dresses & Gowns • Custom Bridal Gowns • Lingerie • Alterations

572-5884

Kaimana’s Beach Hale GERMAN CLEANING

& ORGANIZING

at Baby Beach www.kaimanasbeachhale.com Special this month. $125-$195 a day. Your own private Ohana. Continental breakfast served. Full kitchen with espresso machine & D/W. Call 667-6968 for info.

offers thorough house cleaning & ordering. Detail oriented & reliable, refs. available.

Call 385-1323

PACIFIC OHANA & VEA LANDSCAPING providing Landscaping, Tree trimming, Stonewalls and Concrete work. Licensed.

SERVICES $CASH$ Immediate cash for structured settlements, annuities, law suits, inheritance, mortgage notes & cash flows. J.G. WENTWORTH #1 1-800-794-7310 (AAN CAN) LOLOHEA MASON Rockwall, fencing and driveway. Lowest prices. Licensed and insured. Call 808-205-1777

ALL AREAS - ROOMMATE.COM Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your MAUI RECYCLING SERVICE roommate with a click of the Picks up all your glass, plastic, alumouse! Visit: www.Roommates.com (AAN minum, tin, newspaper, & cardboard. Home Pickup; a convenCAN) ience for $17.50/mo! Bi-monthly pick up. Commercial accounts VACATION avail. Call Now! 244-0443

RENTALS

CLEAN, AFFORDABLE Accommodations in our vacation rental from $69 per day. Call Toll Free Wailuku Guesthouse 877-9868270 or www.wailukuhouse.com

Ho’Olako Masonry Concrete work, 30 yrs in business, specializing in beautiful custom stone walls, 344-4151- 344-6629 www.bestofmaui.com/maskell

808-264-6997 ask for Tevita

Kihei Air Conditioning SERVICE MAINTENANCE INSTALLATION

Fast, Friendly, Reliable

CALL STEVE 808.757.1830

BOOK YOUR AD TODAY! Call 244-0777 by 4 pm on Monday to get your ad in

CLASSIFIEDS

Maui Time Weekly!

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22)

Neglect is a kind of abuse too, and Libras are more likely to suffer it than any other sign. That’s mostly because you’re so adaptable, polite, and sensitive to others’ needs—often at the expense of your own. This isn’t necessarily about being a squeaky wheel (though it would be good if you could learn that raising hell is just what’s necessary sometimes), but about creating balance, something you’re supposed to be good at. Where’s the balance in this situation? You give a lot and get essentially ignored in return? Bullshit, and staying in the situation just because you’ve already been in it this long is even more and stinkier bullshit. Call shenanigans on the whole situation and demand that it be fixed, or get out altogether.

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21) You might want to humor that little gnat buzzing in your ear. We both know that you’d have no problem bowling over this childish and almost laughable opposition, but I ask you: what’s the point, really? Pick your battles. That means perhaps choosing to lose some just because it will smooth things out in the long run, make someone else feel good about themselves, or just because in this case it really doesn’t matter either way. You have the luxury of the superior position here. That should inspire kindness, not sadism. If it doesn’t, get yourself to a therapist and figure out why not.

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21) Tell your truth. All of it, without compromise. Revealing only facets of your story will probably be disastrous; expressing every last bit could work miracles. This is the time to let it all hang out, under fluorescent lights, the good with the bad. Shyness has to stay the hell out of the way; that boat has sailed. If you try to hide anything, people will always imagine that whatever you’re concealing is far worse than it actually is. Own it all, and take the risk of showing it all to someone else. Your “bad” stuff isn’t as bad as you think; those you let see it might even surprise you by considering it beautiful.

30

JANUARY 3, 2008

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

BOUNTY MUSIC Ukuleles starting at $2999

CE CLEARAN O T P U ITEMS F F O 75%

Acoustic Guitars Starting at

14999

$

Drum Sets starting at

Digital Pianos starting at $59995

49900

$

Fender Squire 51 Guitar $ 18800

PLAY NOW with 90 Days Same as Cash NO MONEY DOWN (O.A.C.) $300 minimum

Lessons on Guitar - Ukulele - Keyboards - Drums • Plus REPAIRS & RENTALS Serving Maui Since 1979

Sale Ends 1- 31-08

While supplies last!

111 Hana Hwy. • Kahului 871-1141 • www.ukes.com

ROLAND • YAMAHA • MACKIE • SHURE • TASCAM • ALESIS • DIGITECH • QSC • SWR • CASIO

MAUI MUSIC UKULELE • KOALOHA UKULELE • KELII UKULELE • KAMAKA

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22)

INTERNET PRICES WITH LOCAL SERVICE LANIKAI • AUDIO-TECHNICA • MONSTER CABLE • AMERICAN DJ • TAMA

Don’t be a seeing eye dog. It’s lovely that you can really be there for someone, and help them in a way you’re uniquely qualified for. But I despise how you’ll sublimate your own desires in order to fulfill someone else’s needs. Even seeing eye dogs get time off to play and just be dogs. When’s your time to play? You don’t need to cut off the leash and go chase balls in traffic—that’s as dangerous for a Virgo as any golden retriever. But you ought to have enough slack in the ties that bind you that you can run and play when you need to without getting your nose slapped with a rolled-up newspaper. In fact, if you’re not getting a cookie and a hug when you come back to do your duty, you’re getting ripped off.


Mind Body

Mind Body Spirit A G U I D E F O R H E A LT H Y L I V I N G

Spirit

A.L.O.H.A. MASSAGE HOLIDAY GIFT PACKAGES 10-15% Buy 4 & the 5th one is FREE OFF & Acupuncture Holiday Gift Certificates a savings of

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30

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MAT # 8803

Gift Certificates Available

Ancient Techniques with Herbs and Balms $

Call for details

Balancing your health in a harmonious way! Traditional Japanese Acupuncture • Herbs • Skin/Body Restoration

2114 N. CHURCH ST. • WAILUKU •

249.8280

M AUI T RANSFORMATIONS Counseling Hypnosis & EMDR

January 5- Wailuku • January 8 - Haiku January 12 - Kihei”

“Become a Nonsmoker Through Self Hypnosis”

Ancient Techniques with Herbs & Balms

45 Body Spirit Mind $45

‘Pan’

Located in Pukalani, Daily 9-5

8 yrs experience

298-8869

LOCATED IN PUKALANI

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All classes EXOTIC are at the Lahaina in Balance FITNESS DANCE BodyLocation

Taster Class Upcoming Classes: “Effortless Weight Loss Through Self-Hypnosis”

a

THAI THAI B O D Y W O R K BODYWORK

(while supplies last)

90 min. MASSAGE only

$

AUTHENTIC

-

Saturday, Jan 5th, 1- 2:30 -$25

This delicious class is designed for all women and guaranteed fun! You’ll learn basic exotic dance and pole moves, plus a routine to take home! No experience necessary. Stilettos are optional. ;-)

Level 1/2 - 8 Week Series - $160 Sundays, Jan 6 - Feb 24, 11AM - 12:30PM Wednesday, Jan 9 - Feb 27. 5:30PM - 7PM

Freestyle Friday PM Pole Party

Mind Body Spirit

January 5 - Wailuku • January 12 - Kihei

Limited space, call to RSVP and for time, location and more information.

Maribeth Theisen INTUITIVE, NURTURING TOUCH By Vinceanna. 808-264-1830

MSW,LCSW, CHT • 269.2923 www.MauiTransformations.com

Upcountry Bodywork with Richard Experience a Swedish-based session, incorporating a variety of HEARTFELT TEMPLE therapeutic bodyworks. Deep BODYWORK Releases Aches and Pains. Sacred Tissue, Acupressure, Reflexology Soothing LOMILOMI. Gentle and Sports Stretching. Schedule a relaxing and healing session by Powerfully Transformative Chakracalling 280-8557 Centered Therapies. Conscious/Connected/Balancing DIVINE TANTRA Energetic. Delightfully Exquisite! 269-2263 Relax and Let Go. Aaah....Bliss. Relief Guaranteed. Your Body is Aloha Healing Women Retreats Your Temple. CALL: 875-8388 Abuse, grief,eating disorders,weight loss & spiritualiFind Maui’s Holistic Events! ty. Stop suffering, come heal on Visit www.mauivision.net today the Big Island. Phone counseling & and explore our extensive mind, Huna harmony cards too. 1-888body & spirit listings. New 967-8622 healthretreats.info Dec./Jan. Maui Vision Magazine Out Now! Call 669-9091 for info. Experience True Thai Bodywork Herbs, Balms, and Ancient Techniques to Relieve Stress and Happy 2008~ Remember, it’s all about Heartful Clear Obstructed Energies. Call 344-2695 for appointment. $45 Connection- Make it a love-filled New Year with more of what you BODYWORK FOR MEN want and less of what you don’t, Strong & soothing hands offering a both in and out of the bedroom! If Full-Body combination of alternanot now, when? Call Dr. tive & traditional styles by trained Bouchard for a free phone consult. male. Private studio. Call Dennis at Aloha Marital Health & Happiness, 344-3425. Visit sexhappiness.com 891-0952 www.MauiBodyWork.com

Open to all WOMEN! - Come practice your pole and floor work! Friday, January 18th 7PM-9PM - $20/$25 at the door Only 12 spaces available so sign up early!

Class Schedule for Paia,The Vibe location coming soon! Sign up for our email newsletter!

808.870.8868 • www.StudioButterflyMaui.com Classes are for women ONLY!

CLUB TANTRA Maui - Saturdays, 7PM. Couples learn the art of sacred sexuality. Tantra demos, coached practice, intimate party. First timers attend orientation class. Tantra School 3rd week, monthly. Celebrate Sacred Sexuality, 3rd weekend, Tantra pujas, groups, private counseling. www.schooloftantra.com, 808244-4103, 808-244-4921.

LICENSED MASSAGE THERAPY Enjoy a relaxing Professional Massage. Private, Comfortable Upcountry Lanai by a Certified LMT $60/hr. For Deep Tissue, Lomi or Swedish, call Susan at 573-4899 or 276-2114. Same day appts. available. MAT#8984

La’a Kea Holistic Bodywork Deep Tissue, Efflorage, Energetic, Cranial, Deep Belly. Contact LEMURIAN SPIRITUAL HEALTH Autumn @ 344-4814. Upcountry, $60/hr, 9am-9pm & HEALING CENTER Relationship counseling, personal growth coaching, holotropic NEW ARRIVALS! breathwork, voice dialogue, hypnotherapy, pastlife regression, BUTTERFLY DROPOUT tantra, UFO studies, matchmakALSO: ing, communication classes, • Da Nang • Jewelry gestalt therapy, primal therapy, • Junk Food • Shoes spiritual emergence, workshops, • Hawaiiana yoga and more. Sasha Lessin, Ph. D. & Janet Kira Lessin - 244-4921, 244-4103 www.lemuriancenter.com

Alice In Hulaland

MAUI BODY & SOUL Imagine. Relax in our Steam Room, Infrared Sauna, Floatation Tank, Jacuzzi, and Aromatherapy Cedar Sauna all to yourself starting at $25. Massages too! Kihei, Azeka II. 875-9004 MAE#2196

19 Baldwin Ave Paia 579-9922

Get your questions answered about: • Wealth • Relationships • Health • Purpose • Career • Happiness

Dawn Crystal INTUITIVE LIFE COACH Serving all of Maui • In-Person

808-268-6242

Green Lotus

MASSAGE

MASSAGE BY KONA Swedish, Lomi Lomi, Deep Tissue. Strong hands, gentle spirit. Nurturing & healing. In/out call, MAT#9817, Discount rates available! 280-2623

PRE-HOLIDAY SAVINGS 30-50% OFF! SELECT ITEMS Crystals . Minerals Stones . Asian Art Incense . Candles

MDG Bldg. 2nd Floor 1995 Main, Wailuku Open M, W, F 11a-4p

MAUI TROPICAL MASSAGE Relax to a deeply healing therapeutic massage by strong, sensitive, intuitive hands. Lomi Lomi--Hot Stone Deep Tissue--Aromatherapy Ask about our TROPICAL BLISS sessions with two synchronized therapists Have Table-Will Travel to your place or a beach near you. For more info call 283-6938 LMT #3132

Gift Certificates Available

RETAIL

HAWAIIAN YOGA BOUTIQUE

Maui’s source for everything Yoga Body Soul & Home 71 Baldwin A-1 – Paia • Maui

808-579-8419

Now on the Big Island - Pahoa

808-965-6640

exoticyogaadventures@yahoo.com

264.9808

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 3, 2008

31


For Rent!

Wailuku Ohana

Only 4 Houses from the Ocean!

back

side HIGH VISIBILITY! LOW COSTS! BACK SIDE CLASSIFIEDS WORK! CALL (808) 283-3260 for complete details!

START THE NEW YEAR RIGHT! CONSOLIDATE YOUR HOLIDAY DEBT WITH A LOW FIXED RATE

• • • • • • •

Utilities included Washer/Dryer access Internet + WiFi Curbside Recycling No smoking / pets $950+ deposit Now showing call Tommy at 283-0512

The Fastest Growing Privacy Hedge Available!

Sales Mgr.

269-1740

Amanda K. Mori 808.872.1161 (Direct)

Yellow Seed Bamboo Haiku • Maui • Hawaii

amanda.mori@homestreet.com

2008 Mercedes-Benz Championships

Air Maui Helicopter Tours 2 for 1 Special!

2BR / 2BA Haleakala Gardens Condo for Rent.

Watch the previous year’s PGA TOUR champions compete in the season-opening 2008 Mercedes-Benz Championship, Dec. 31-Jan. 7 at Kapalua’s Plantation Course. Tickets are available now. Call 808/665-9160 for more info.(Lahainaluna High School Foundation)

West Maui/Molokai Special. Only Air Maui offers this incredible flight! Call now for your 2 for 1 Kama‘aina special or special visitor rate! Expires Dec. 31, 2007. For reservations call 877-7005

1 Block to beach. Upstairs unit with view. A/C , Washer/Dryer , Ceiling Fans. $1500. plus deposit. No Smoking. No Pets. Available now. Call Mark at 250-3444

On The UPside with TERI

MAUI TECH GIRL

LARGE STUDIO APARTMENT

MAUI’S HOTTEST “CALL-IN” RADIO PROGRAM

Make the Connection...Capture the Concept. Web Design & All Your Computer Needs. mauitechgirl.com or 572-4665

ON THE FLY BOOKKEEPING Bookkeeping when you need it. Call Terez @ 808-276-1650

MOBILE MECHANIC Clint’s Car & Truck Repair, ASE Certified Master Mechanic, Free Estimates, Call 250-4491 seven days a week

PRE-FORECLOSURE CONDOS Kihei and Wailuku locations. Prices from $319,000 and under. Contact Josh Jerman, Broker 808-283-2222. Century 21 All Islands

PRE-FORECLOSURE CONDOS!

NO WAITING! MAILBOXES IN WAILUKU!

Come talk to me!

Tony Funes (R)

Free Pre-Qualification at www.homestreet.com/amori

Tune in every FRIDAY at our NEW TIME *NOON* on KAOI 1110 AM. Call in 808-242-7800.

Does your broker pay you 100% commission? Offering one of Maui’s highest commission splits!

285 W. Kaahumanu Ave. Suite 201 Kahului, HI 96732

Completely remodeled bath, kitchen & living space. Fully furnished with all new furniture, central a/c, washer/dryer, lani, garage. Utilities and cable t.v. included. Call 264-0950

ATTENTION REALTORS

BRIAN SLAGLE !!! Trying to get in touch with BRIAN SLAGLE. Brian Where are you ? Are you still on Maui ? Send me an email jbfint@yahoo.com Do you know BRIAN SLAGLE ? If you know BRIAN SLAGLE please drop me a line. Mahalo.

MAUI TATTOO COMPANY Traditional, Custom, Polynesian, Cover-Ups, Portraits & Permanent Makeup. 1945 S. Kihei Rd., under Lu Lu’s. 874-0034

Happy New Year ROLL DOWN AWNINGS to protect your lanai, windows, patios, or decks CUSTOM COVERS to protect your outdoor or household items

from

Green Ti

Boutique & Massage

Bringing Health & Wellness into 2008

Business Etc.- 808.242.8200

Massage • Acupuncture • Gifts 40 N. Market St. Wailuku • 242-8788 Open 7 Days M-F 10-6, Sat-Sun 10-5 Gift Certificates Available

Main & Market, Wailuku • Fax# 808.242.8288 printshop@mauibusinessetc.com

SPORTFISHING

PRICED BELOW MARKET

Kihei Condo 1Bd/1Ba - Pool + Tennis

Wailuku Condo

$249,000 $319,000

3Bd/2Ba - New Carpet and Paint Josh Jerman, Broker

283-2222 Century 21 All Islands www.joshjerman.com

Stop Wishin’ & Go Fishin’ 42 ft. Bertram Sportfishers Catch a 500+lb Marlin & your trip is (16 caught in 2006)

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Toll Free 1-800-590-0133

NOW OPEN LATE – MON-SAT 10AM-9PM

11.28 Local?, January 3, 2008, Volume 11, Issue 28, MauiTime  

MauiTime talks about the huge melting pot that Maui is, and what it means to be local. An insight on Mulligans on the Blue. The film "Charli...