14.07 Where Has Tom Green Been?, August 5, 2010, Volume 14, Issue 7, MauiTime

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August 5, 2010

Contents VOLUME 14

â&#x153;&#x161;

THIS WEEKâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S QUESTION: What is your bum on?

ISSUE 07

5 NEWS & VIEWS

Contributors: Caeriel Crestin, Beau Ewan, Nancy Kanyuk, Doug Levin, Jared Libby, Greg Mebel, Rob Parsons, Ron Pitts, Chuck Shepherd, Sara Tekula, Ynez Tongson, Barry Wurst II

Coconut Wireless talks Council district reform and the coming countywide plastic bag ban. We begin our election coverage with a look at the contenders (and pretenders) trying to unseat Sen. Dan Inouye. Open Letters turns its nose up at vegans. A former UH quarterback is cut in Quizunderstood. ML&P loses less in By the Numbers. Two Hawaii lawmakers get biotech love in Spin Cycle. African heroin addicts reinject in News of the Weird. Eh Brah! pays thanks to a wallet returner.

Photographer: Sean Michael Hower mauiweddingmedias.com / howerphotography.com Your Mum

10 FEATURE STORY

Editor: Jacob Shafer (808) 283-1308 / jacob@mauitime.com @jacobshafer on Twitter Deadline Associate Editor: Anu Yagi (808) 264-8039 / calendar@mauitime.com @anuheayagi on Twitter The Mother Ship Proofreader: Dina Wilson

Graphic Designers: Amy Mendolia, Christina Tarleton

Hey, remember Tom Green, the grossout comic who used to have a show on MTV? Well, heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s back. (Actually he never went away.) And heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s coming to Maui. And he talked story with Anu Yagi.

Advertising Executive: Brad Chambers (808) 283-3260 / brad@mauitime.com Vacation

15 FOOD & DRINK

Art Director: Chris Skiles (808) 281-8975 / chris@mauitime.com lucky11studios.com Tom Greenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s face

General Manager: Jennifer Russo (808) 280-3286 / jen@mauitime.com @jenrusso on Twitter Pretend Vacation Administrative Executive: Judy Toba (808) 244-0777 / judy@mauitime.com Whaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;?

Administrative Assistant: Jennifer Brown Web Design: Linear Publishing www.linearpublishing.com Publisher: Tommy Russo (808) 283-0512 / tommy@mauitime.com @tommyrusso on Twitter A chicken tractor

Jen Russo samples the grinds at Kahuluiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;food court by the sea.â&#x20AC;?

17 MUSIC SCENE Celtic Tigers front-man Murray Thorne releases a solo album, and Anu Yagi takes a listen.

18 FILM CRITIQUE Barry Wurst II says The Other Guys is an arresting buddy-cop comedy.

19 Film Capsules/Listings

20 THIS WEEKâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S PICKS MauiTime is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright Š 2009 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved.

Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. MauiTime may be distributed only by MauiTimeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime.

MauiTime 33 N. Market St., Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 office (808) 244-0777 â&#x20AC;˘ fax (808) 244-0446 www.mauitime.com @mauitime on Twitter Deadlines: Display Advertising: Friday Noon Classified: Monday 4pm Calendar: Monday Noon Circulation: 18,000 copies of the MauiTime

Wailuku First Friday, Mos Def on the West side (for real this time) and Moth at Stella Blues.

Congratulations Jason Hayner

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by Jacob Shafer

News + Views

jacob@mauitime.com + @jacobshafer on Twitter

Coconut Wireless ‘Moment of Truth’ For Maui Election Reform The way Maui County elects its Council is flawed. It may even be unconstitutional.

But it could also change. Under the current system, Maui has nine “residency areas,” which vary radically in size and population, and one Councilmember is elected from each area by all county voters.

Recently, the Council’s Committee of the Whole considered two proposals aimed at fundamentally altering the voting process. The first, from the Kula Community Association, would create three districts of roughly equal population, with three Councilmembers elected from each. The second proposal, backed by the West Maui Charter Working Group, would create nine single-member districts of roughly equal population, with one Councilmember elected from each. In both cases, voters would vote only for a candidate or candidates in their respective district. The second proposal has the support of Councilmember Jo Anne Johnson, who introduced a draft resolution that would put the question on the ballot in November. Now, the full Council will take up the matter on Friday, August 6 (meeting begins at 9am in the Council Chambers in Wailuku). Reached for comment, attorney Lance Collins— who works with the West Maui Charter Working Group—called it “a moment of truth” for the Council. Meanwhile, in an August 3 Maui News Viewpoint, Councilmember Danny Mateo of Molokai said the proposal would hurt Molokai and Lanai residents because they’d be folded in with other regions due to their small populations. Of course, that’s sort of the point—does it make sense for such sparsely populated areas to enjoy the same representation as places like Kahului, Kihei and West Maui? That’ll be up for discussion on Friday. And whatever the outcome, everyone will be impacted.

Lingle Nominees ‘Unqualified’?

Judge Katherine Leonard is “unqualified” to be Chief Justice of the Hawaii Supreme Court, at least according to the Hawaii State Bar Association’s (HSBA) board of directors. Leonard, nominated July 22

by Gov. Lingle, would be the first woman ever to head up the state’s high court,

Judge To‘oto‘o’s respective bodies of work, as well as their character and integrity.”

MECO Hikes Rates, PUC Deliberates Maui County customers will see their already robust power bills go up again, thanks to a Maui Electric Company (MECO) rate hike approved by the Public Utilities Commission (PUC) that kicked in August 1. The 3.3 percent increase

customers at the point of sale for the purpose of transporting groceries or other goods.” The law is aimed at reducing waste and protecting the environment while encouraging “the use of environmentally preferable alternatives...such as recyclable paper bags or reusable bags.” All well and good, but how is this going to work in practice? What form will enforcement take, and what, exactly, will it mean for business owners and customers? Those

Lingle stopped just short of accusing HSBA of sexism, stating that it’s “impossible to know whether there is a political, gender or ethnic bias.” For those just joining us, that’s called saying it without saying it. which has done nothing to quell the controversy. In a release, Lingle called HSBA’s assessment “outrageous” and claimed it’s based on an “unfair,” “flawed” process that’s “conducted under a veil of secrecy.” Lingle stopped just short of accusing HSBA of sexism, stating that it’s “impossible to know whether there is a political, gender or ethnic bias.” (For those just joining us, that’s called saying it without saying it.) HSBA also gave a thumbs-down to Lingle’s Circuit Court nominee, Judge Faauuga To‘oto‘o, a fact that’s gotten less play (although To‘o‘oto‘o would break a barrier of his own, becoming Hawaii’s first Samoan Circuit Court judge). In the end, Lingle said, she hopes the Senate Judiciary Committe—which held hearings on both nominees this week—“will carefully consider the overwhelming favorable testimony from the legal community and those who know Judge Leonard’s and

will raise the average Maui bill by $5.43 a month ($5.21 on Molokai, $5.61 on Lanai). MECO claims the money “will help pay for more than $122 million in new capital projects to improve service reliability.” In 2009, MECO asked the PUC to approve a 9.7 percent rate hike; the 3.3 percent increase was granted on an interim basis while the PUC continues to review MECO’s request.

Plastic Bag Ban Coming Soon; Public Hearing Coming Sooner It’s gotten lost in the election-year din, but in just six months Maui County grocery stores, retail outlets and other businesses will no longer be allowed to wrap items in plastic bags. The Plastic Bag Reduction Ordinance—passed in 2008 and set to take effect January 11, 2011—prohibits businesses countywide “from providing plastic bags to their

questions will be answered—or at least addressed—at an August 17 public hearing, set for noon in the Kalana Pakui Conference Room in Wailuku. For more information on both the meeting and the ordinance, call Recycle Maui County at 270-7880 or visit mauicounty.gov. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1407c

News. .com

THE BLOG ROLL Na Koa Ikaika Maui lost one of its best (and definitely best-named) players when Keoni Ruth was nabbed by the Philadelphia Phillies this week.

Ruth was shipped to the Lakewood BlueClaws, part of...

Read more at mauifeed.com

Maui coffee farmers Gerry Ross and Janet Simpson won Best Coffee on Maui for the second year in a row at the Hawaii Coffee Association’s Annual Statewide Cupping Competition, held recently on...

Read more at mauidish.com

Election season is here, and that means information and misinformation are everywhere. Sorting the former from the latter is your job as a voter. Thankfully, you’ve got help. Like the Kula Community Association primary election forum, set for...

Read more at mauivents.com

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jacob@mauitime.com + @jacobshafer on Twitter

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Candidate Profiles

O

ver the next month weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll examine the various state and county races, culminating in endorsements before the September 18 primary election. This week, we begin our coverage with a look at the contest for one of Hawaiiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s two U.S. Senate seats, which has been held by Dan Inouye since 1963.

Name: JIM BREWER Party: Green ProďŹ le: Brewer has previously run for Governor, most recently in 2006, when he earned 1.6 percent of the vote. In keeping with the philosophy of his party at both the state and national level, heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s far-leftâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;staunchly pro-environment, anti-war and anti-big business.

Web site: Greenhawaii.org Name: CAM CAVASSO Party: Republican ProďŹ le: Cavasso challenged Inouye in 2004, losing by more than 50 percent. Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s back, apparently undaunted. Cavasso does have government experience, having served a stint in the state House from the mid-â&#x20AC;&#x2122;80s to early-â&#x20AC;&#x2122;90s. Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a hard-line right-winger across the board who, as blogger Ian Lind pointed out in June, is affiliated with Oahubased Pacific Christian University, which teaches, among other subjects, classes in â&#x20AC;&#x153;Fear of the Lordâ&#x20AC;? and â&#x20AC;&#x153;Angeology.â&#x20AC;?

Web site: Camcavasso.com Name: JEFF JARRETT Party: Independent ProďŹ le: According to his campaign profile Jarrett is a â&#x20AC;&#x153;champion for the causes of the elderly and helpless,â&#x20AC;? born â&#x20AC;&#x153;in 1961

in Salt Lake City, Utahâ&#x20AC;? and raised with a â&#x20AC;&#x153;mid-west stong work [ethic]â&#x20AC;? and â&#x20AC;&#x153;religious foundation.â&#x20AC;? His platform is all over the map, jumping from support for Arizonaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s immigration law to demands that all Americans receive the quality (government-run) health care enjoyed by members of Congress to railing against the Federal Reserve (â&#x20AC;&#x153;a private corporation run by the globalistsâ&#x20AC;?), but he shares a sense of populist angst and anti-government paranoia that should play well with the Tea Party crowd.

Web site: J4h.org Name: LLOYD MALLAN Party: Libertarian ProďŹ le: Mallan is a true Libertarian in that he embraces issues on both (extreme) ends of the political spectrum. On the one hand, he supports drug legalization, opposes the death penalty and backs a version of Hawaiian soverignty several steps past the Akaka Bill (which he opposes), including the sale of ceded lands back to Native Hawaiians and â&#x20AC;&#x153;a public referendum to answer the question whether the State of Hawaii should peaceably secede from The United States.â&#x20AC;? On the other hand, he supports the privatization of â&#x20AC;&#x153;all government servicesâ&#x20AC;? and the abolition of the IRS, INS and income tax.

Oh, and â&#x20AC;&#x153;no more rockets on Kauai!â&#x20AC;?

Web site: Freedominourtime.org Name: EDDIE PIRKOWSKI Party: Republican ProďŹ le: We tried. In all honesty, we tried.

But when the only Web site we can find is titled â&#x20AC;&#x153;Friends Eddie US Senate Hawaii 2006 2010â&#x20AC;? it sort of seems like youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not even trying. And when the first few sentences of your â&#x20AC;&#x153;platformâ&#x20AC;? read like the musings of a sleep-deprived third-grade social studies student with a learning disability, well, thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s kind of the end of the road.

Web site: M Mauisenator.wordpress.com

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Name:

JOHN ROCO Party: Republican ProďŹ le: Good lord.

This is a joke, right? Right?

Seriously: watch the video on the front page of Rocoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Web site regarding HB444 (sample line: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Being blonde, or perfering blondes, may someday become more important in determining a future partner than whether or not one is a man or a womanâ&#x20AC;?) and try not to imagine that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a living incarnation of that weird, automated, Stephen Hawking computer voice. No really, check it out. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s awesome, in the scariest possible sense of the word.

Web site: Roco4senator.blogspot.com Name: ANDREW WOERNER Party: Democrat ProďŹ le: Woerner seems to be a product of Obama Letdown Syndromeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;disillusioned by the distance between the Presidentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lofty rhetoric and the realities of his policies, but still loyal to the ideals that underpin them. He even goes so far as to say he has â&#x20AC;&#x153;the greatest respect for Senator Inouyeâ&#x20AC;? and is â&#x20AC;&#x153;truly in awe of the contributions heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s made.â&#x20AC;? One might question why Woerner, who admits his â&#x20AC;&#x153;chances are extremely slim,â&#x20AC;? is running in the first place. His answer? â&#x20AC;&#x153;I will constantly push the conversation toward addressing the root causes of the growing dysfunction in our government.â&#x20AC;?

Web site: Andyforussenatehawaii.com â&#x2013; To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1407u

For updated election coverage, including podcasts and video interviews, visit mauitime.com or our news blog, mauifeed.com

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August 5, 2010

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News + Views

By the NUMBERS

$6.3 million

Federal funds allocated to build an “aircraft rescue and fire fighting building” at the Lanai Airport, according to a joint release by Senators Akaka and Inouye

$4.6 million $54.2 million

4 QUIZunderstood 1. This week, the Washington Redskins cut former University of Hawaii quarterback Colt Brennan. How many NCAA records did Brennan set or tie at UH? A. 5 B. 7 C. 0 Bonus: What two universities did Brennan attend before he began his UH career in 2005?

2. After what legendary Hawaiian figure are the Hawaiian Islands named?

Bonus: What are the names of his three brothers, credited with discovering and populating other Pacific islands?

3. During the filming of what movie did actor Harrison Ford receive papaya enzyme injections to treat a ruptured disc?

Bonus: What is the procedure called?

See answers, page 29

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August 5, 2010

Maui Land & Pineapple’s second-quarter loss, reported this week

ML&P’s second-quarter loss in 2009

Number of breweries under the umbrella of the Craft Brewers Alliance; the Oregon-based company bought Kona Brewing Co. this week

Sources: Securities and Exchange Commission, Akaka.senate.gov, Kona Brewing Co., Craft Brewers Alliance, Pacific Business News

SPIN CYCLE Ignoble Distinction of the Week...

This week, the Biotechnology Industry Organization (BIO), an international consortium whose member list includes Monsanto and Dow Chemical, named House Speaker Calvin Say and state Rep. Clift Tsuji “Legislators of the Year.”

In a BIO release, Fred Perlack, president of the Hawaii Crop Improvement Association—also backed by Monsanto and Dow—praised Say and Tsuji as “vocal proponents of biotechnology,” who “for the good of the state...have worked effectively and tirelessly to minimize policies that would otherwise negatively impact this vital industry.”

by Chuck Shepherd

News + Views

chuck@mauitime.com

BROKEN FIX With heroin too expensive for many African addicts, some ask an addicted friend for a temporary fix—withdrawing a teaspoonful of the friend’s herointinged blood and injecting it into their own bloodstream. Evidence of this practice (called “flashblood”) comes from anecdotes from health officials in Tanzania, Zanzibar and Kenya, reported in the New York Times in July. Doctors said they question the euphoria-producing quality of such tiny amounts of heroin, but are certain that flashblood will potently deliver any HIV present in the donor’s blood.

MOTHERS OF THE YEAR (1) Ranay Collins, 49, was arrested in Las Vegas in June and charged with beating her 16-year-old daughter with a cane.

The arresting officer quoted Collins’s explanation: “That [expletive] owes me $50 for rent.” (2) Police arrested Christina Muniz, 29, in Surprise, Arizona, in June, after being summoned to the home by Muniz’s son, 11. Muniz had just informed the boy and his brother, 6, that she was abandoning them to move to California with her boyfriend to fulfill her dream of becoming a stripper. With police watching, the older boy approached Muniz for a hug, but Muniz slugged him in the stomach.

UTERO FIRED! Jammie Harms, 34, who had been executive assistant to CEO John Smith of the developer Hearthstone Homes, filed a lawsuit against the Omaha, Nebraska, company in June for wrongful firing. According to the lawsuit, Smith told Harms that, after consulting with psychics, he was troubled by her pregnancy.

He said he was feeling “negative energy” from her fetus, sensing that it was “hostile” toward him and causing him to be reminded of his own unpleasant experience as a fetus.

IT’S A LEAGUE GAME, SMOKEY Youth worker Cherie Beekman, 33, took a group of her kids to a bowling alley in Didsbury, England, in April for a diversion but got her thumb stuck in her bowling ball. She was taken to a fire station, where, for over two hours, rescuers used an electric saw, hacksaw and chisel to free her.

ATTENTION ALL PERVS: MOVE TO FLORIDA David Lowe, 47, was convicted in Brooksville,

Florida, last year of “lewd or lascivious exhibition” after he sat in his car, masturbating, outside a convenience store while ostentatiously holding a large dildo to his mouth in front of a woman and her child. In July 2010, a Florida appeals court reversed the conviction and freed Lowe, pointing out that conviction under that particular statute requires “sexual activity,” which is defined as occurring between two or more persons.

THE MESSED UP APPLE DOESN’T FALL FAR FROM THE ABUSIVE TREE Mark Seamands, 39, went to trial in May in Port Angeles, Washington, accused of seconddegree assault and two lesser charges for the hot-iron “branding” of his three children, aged 13, 15 and 18. Each of the kids bore the mark “SK,” for “Seamands’s Kids.” At trial, however, the kids testified that they not only consented to the branding but thought it was cool (despite the second-degree burns), and as a result, the jury dismissed the assault charge and deadlocked on the two lesser ones.

EH BRAH!

Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less (which we reserve the right to edit), changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent to “Eh Brah!” c/o MauiTime, 33 N. Market St, Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 or send an e-mail to

ehbrah@mauitime.com This is for the person who returned my wallet—cash, credit cards and all—and not only didn’t ask for a reward, but did it totally anonymously so I couldn’t even thank you. That was the definition of a good act, done in secret and completely forsaking praise and glory. But don’t think you escaped without a reward: that’s some serious karma points in the bank for sure. I just wish there were more like you out there. Aloha. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1407e

YOUR NEXT OLYMPIC EVENT In July, Mike Morateck, 46, a self-described “man of science,” won the Jefferson (Wisconsin) County Fair’s annual cricketspitting contest with a hock of 21 feet, 2 inches. His two main “scientific” secrets (he told Milwaukee’s Journal Sentinel): “pick a big cricket” and “feet first on its back with the head pointing out because you don’t want the legs dragging on the way out.”

INCOMPETENT CRIMINALS (1) Allen Dawes, 28, and Jimmy Lee, 43, were charged as burglars in, respectively, York, Pennsylvania (June), and Blackburn, England (July), after having inexplicably left clues behind. For reasons unreported, Dawes had left his birth certificate at the scene and Lee his DNA-laden false teeth. (2) Officials at the Synergy Credit Union in Lashburn, Saskatchewan, have the surveillance video but not the perp. On April 13, a man in black with a curved sword jabbed at the ATM, then smashed his way through the glass front door, then roamed around, leaping over counters and jabbing at more things with the sword before departing empty-handed (and bleeding). ■

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August 5, 2010

9

WHERE

THE HELL

HAS

TOM

GREEN BEEN ?

AND

WHY SHOULD YOU

CARE? WORDS BY

ANU YAGI PHOTOGRAPHY BY NEIL VISEL 10 August 5, 2010

T WAS THE SPRING OF 1999.

The free world was helmed by the Clinton Administration. Simply owning a cell phone was a status symbol. Britney Spears, the Backstreet Boys and Ricky Martin ruled the pop charts.

Total Request Live with Carson Daly was bigger than The Daily Show With Jon Stewart. People still bought newspapers. Reality TV had yet to clench its desperate death-grip on our remote controls. And the Internet was in its infancy. ÂťContinued on pg.12

August 5, 2010

11

Though many fans from his MTV days have forgotten him, Green claims this year has been the best of his career.

12 August 5, 2010

I

t was then that MTV picked up The Tom Green Show, which had run on The Comedy Network in 1997 and originally on Canadian public access television from ’94-’96. “New media” hadn’t entered the lexicon at large, but Green—set to appear August 6 in Lahaina as part of the Maui Celebrity Series—was hanging ten

on that wave still to come, as one of the first artists to air content online. Being the first and only jackass on the block, within two years on MTV, Green was the king of raunch comedy. He humped a dead moose, gave us (or rather, his parents) the “Slutmobile,” suckled a cow’s udder and sang “The Bum Bum Song” (which he promptly retired from TRL after hitting #1 in just five days, citing “fair[ness] to [boy band] 98 Degrees”).

Love or hate his humor, you can’t

deny that Green’s got balls. Well, ball.

Diagnosed with testicular cancer in 2000, Green—to critical acclaim—shared his bout with audiences in a one-hour special, which brought his show’s MTV run to a close (it was briefly revived in 2003). He survived cancer (plus box office flops and a failed marriage to Drew Barrymore), but thereafter seemed to swim straight out of the very mainstream he’d helped redefine.

So where the hell did Tom Green go?

Y

“

ou know, you’re the third celebrity I’ve talked to about their balls,” I tell Green during our phone interview. He’s at his parents’ house in Quebec, taking a couple days off from touring.

“Who were the other two?” he asks.

“Ellen DeGeneres and Richard Simmons?”

It’s a surprisingly rare funny moment from this comedian/rapper/actor, et alia, who, it turns out, is staunchly straightforward when not on stage (though he does cleverly point out that while I too may have had cancer, I’m “immune” to the kind that cost him a ball).

“It’s been almost ten years for me now,” says Green, who celebrated his 39th birthday last week. “It’s an experience I can look at as a scary one… but testicular cancer—believe it or not—is actually good for a few laughs.”

From graphic surgery footage in his TV special to penning an autobiography titled Hollywood Causes Cancer, Green doesn’t shy away from personal subjects (the only taboo topic is Barrymore). “I’ve always been honest with my show,” he says. “But I’m trying to do everything in a

shows [at tomgreen.com] and there’s always free stuff. But if you really, really want to, you can subscribe for $4.95 a month, and then you get access to the hundreds and hundreds of hours of other content.”

Sure, Green’s got his hardcore fan base built in and (still) plugged in, but with competition from other popular online shows and the quick and dirty nature of viral sensations, it begs the question: is Green’s subscription-based business model workable?

Green says it is—though he admits it’s something he’s still experimenting with.

“As far as there being all these competitors now—other people doing Web shows—that’s not really the way I look at it,” he says. “It’s really an exciting thing that’s going on. It’s a whole new way of looking at things and it’s becoming very, very successful. We’ve got thousands of subscribers. The entire show is completely profitable, without even having a sponsor right now.”

Green has claimed by Tweet and in his blog that this year has been the best of his career, and that he’s looking to syndicate his show this year. Though he recently brought on new team members and an advertising agency to help him with the task, he’s still a

his shtick, especially now that he’s set off on his World Standup Comedy Tour.

“Traveling around and filming has been exciting for me. I’ve been going to a lot of places I’ve never been before. It’s a great way to see the world,” he says, adding this will be his first trip to Maui. “The kind of fun thing about doing this tour is how connected everything is. I’ve been Tweeting as I go, and it’s amazing how wherever I go people know what I’ve been up to. It’s really kind of an interesting experience.”

Internet pioneer and (relatively new) Tweeter though he may be, his opinions on the “definite pitfalls” of the Web are worn on his sleeve—and fodder in his standup.

“It’s something I feel strongly about and [that] has a lot room for funny,” he says. “I don’t really try to name names too much, but I’m actually telling people to get off Facebook. I have a lot of reasons why.

Especially married people. Married people should not be on Facebook. I know that’s controversial to say.”

Buzz on the show—and it’s been almost all good—has praised his more existential stage musings. Though Green says it’s a “traditional standup show” with a little bit of

Funny moments are surprisingly rare with Green. When he’s not on stage, it turns out, he’s staunchly straightforward. fun, ridiculous way. I touch on all sorts of topics, whether it’s going through some personal stuff like [cancer] or talking about things in the news, or some social change that we’re going through with technology, like Facebook and Twitter—and having fun with some of the pitfalls that I’m sort of foreseeing in the future.”

For this trailblazer of the surf-able show, tech is a hot topic. While many of Green’s fans lost track of him after his MTV exit a decade ago, he could always be found online at tomgreen.com (and now on Twitter, @tomgreenlive).

Green began his Web-based talk show Tom Green’s House Tonight from his living room (“yes, [his] actual living room”) in 2006. Talk show-style, it is, in a sense, a return to his roots. Early in his career— along with coffee-toting compatriot Glenn Humplik (who, fans of the MTV show will be glad to hear, is doing well)—Green hosted an overnight call-in radio show for the University of Ottawa while he attended Algonquin College as a broadcasting major. These days, his show is entirely online, with callers able to Skype in their communication.

“I’ve got 500 shows in the can, on the site,” says Green. Notable guests include Adam Corolla, Andrew Dice Clay, Tony Hawk, Ed McMahon and Brook Shields.

“I don’t talk about the subscription service that much,” he says humbly, a contrast to his reputation as a shameless selfpromoter. “There are tons of free

champion (or maybe more like town crier) of independently produced television.

“I’ve got a couple million unique viewers that come on any given month,” he says. “[But] as an independent guy myself, starting a show out of my living room, it wasn’t very easy to get a big sponsor to come in. Now it’s becoming more and more common [but] that didn’t exist even two years ago. It really is opening up right now.”

That’s exciting, Green says, “because there’s always going to be room for everybody who has something original to put out there.”

“The intention is very much full steam ahead, to continue doing my show out of my house,” he says. “We’re doing it once a week now, and then I’m going to go out weekends and do standup somewhere in the world.”

A

s with his MTV days, Green’s out and about interactions with (often unsuspecting) subjects are still a huge part of

music (a trademark of his, as he was after all a rapper, signed by A&M records in his youth).

He promises he’s, “not just going up and preaching about life, though I do a bit of that.”

Green says the show is an evolving work in progress but that he feels he’s “hitting a nice stride.”

“The more I do it, the more I realize exactly what it is I want to be talking about and how I want to talk about it,” he says.

“I’ve been writing constantly and adding new ideas. Since I’ve been on the road now for over eight months, I’ve done probably over 100 shows and it’s really going great.

The audiences are really responding.”

Mauians might have a hand in participating, too, as Green says he “always [has] at least one camera with me.

Sometimes, seven cameras.

“It’s a great part of touring and it’s a great part of bringing my Web show on the road,” he says. “I hope to be getting some great video [on Maui]. I think another big thing you’ll see more of is people touring and doing live performance, and then really tying that in with their Web based projects.”

So where the hell has Tom Green been? Well, he never really left. In fact, he’s been closer to home than ever—just a click away, streaming from his very own living room.

And, come Friday, he’ll aim to prove why he’s still worth listening to, one ball and all. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1407f

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by Jen Russo

Food + Drink

jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso on Twitter

Food Court By the Sea Little trucks by the boat harbor offer big bargains and bigger tastes

I

f you drive along Kahului Beach Road, you’ve surely noticed that the dirt lot near the small boat ramp has become a food court by the sea, filled with lunch trucks offering take-out options.

Each one has its specialties so no one is stepping on anyone else’s toes; the only overlap are the hot dogs and sodas that each carry.

The regulars are Tommy Lau Hee Chicken Hekka, the Shrimp Truck and the $6 Plate Lunch Truck. There is a loose decorum and mutual respect that I can appreciate. These chefs are hard working, and all plates are made to order. The best day to come is Saturday when you can also find the tamale lady, smoked sausages, pasteles and various other vendors. More often than not there’s fresh fish for sale, just caught from the boats going in and out of the harbor.

The Shrimp Truck features shell-on shrimp, de-veined and sauteed on the spot.

Plates run about $12, which gets you a huge amount of shrimp. I have not been able to finish one yet, even when sharing with colleagues. The shrimp are fat but not jumbo, and juicy, sweet and very fresh.

Plates are offered in a variety of butterbased sauces; Hawaiian scampi is the basic, and hot and spicy, spicy pineapple and lemon pepper round out the offerings. The crab salad served here is a mac salad with crab and pairs well with the shrimp. Plates also feature two scoops of rice.

The shrimp is cooked perfectly, and a plate takes about five minutes from the time you order. Shrimp are served over

Short Ribs

a bed of cabbage with a lot of sauce; beware of spillage in the na car. They do wrap it all up in illbag, but the bags are not spillproof. Pulling the shell off iss nd also a messy proposition, and ee made me wish for a shell-free option. The Shrimp Truck comes out Tuesday through Saturday and starts the day around 10:30am. us Tommy Lau Hee is famous for his chicken hekka, a fact that he bills right on his banner. The line at his booth back up the assertion..

Monday through Saturday, 9:30am to 4:30pm, he cooks up his two specialties, chow fun and chicken hekka.

You can get them in one-pint containers for $5 or a quart for $10. Chicken hekka is a sweet, soy-based soupish type of dish similar to sukiyaki, with roughlyy cut chicken pieces (no bones in Tommy Lau Hee’s version), long rice, tofu, shitake mushrooms,, bamboo shoots and aromatics. It’s considered a comfort food on the islands. The tradition behind it (and genesis off thee

Tommy Lau Hee

$6 Plate Lun ches

Chow Fun nam me) is throwing in name) the pot, “whateveh da h heck(a) you have in d da pantry.”

To Tommy Lau Hee’s chow fun is simple and d delicious, lots of pepp pepper on the wide-fat nood noodles with ground beef, but otherwise plain. He offers some specia specials, like Wednesday and Th Thursdays when you can ge get a rib plate with corn an and rice for $8, and also ha has mini plates of all his spec specials for a couple bucks le less. »C Continued on pg.16

August 5, 2010 15

Food + Drink

by Jen Russo jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso on Twitter

from the sweet teriyaki.

On Tuesday, Wednesday O and Friday they have pork Adobo, and Fridays feature Ado chicken Adobo, too. You can chic call in orders for pick-up at 283-8544.

283On Saturdays, the food O court is crowded with extra cour vendors. You can pick up green vend chili and cheese, chicken or pork tamales for $2 each or dozen for $20. The spicy red sauce that comes with them is incredible. The tamales are fresh incred warm, little pockets of corn and w wrapped in corn husks masa w steamed in their and ste

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Shrimp Truck ÂťContinued from pg.15

Mondays and Tuesdays are bargain days, with chili and hot dogs for $6, mini for $4. Fridays and Saturdays feature beef stew.

The $6 Plate Lunches truck means business. They offer steak, chicken, pork or pork ribs in a basic plate that comes with iceburg ur lettuce green salad with your choice of dressing and two scoops rice. They sell out, and the few times Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been by after noon, the first thingg p ave they tell you is what they have eapple Shrim in P y ic p S left. Judging by the fact thatt I h havenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t made it early enough foil wrappers. Whatever to try it, the steak must be you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t eat is easily heated up in the good. For a dollar more you can get two microwave or re-steamed. We like them meat choices on a plate, and for $8 you for Sunday breakfast with fried eggs. Add can get a shrimp combo or short ribs, or the smoked sausage and pasteles and fish a third choice of meat. Their barbecue and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s open season for bargain-hunting has fantastic char, and everything has its gastronomes. â&#x2013; own sauce, sweet teriyaki style. The meats are pre-cut into chunks, not bite-size Got a hot food scoop? Contact Jen Russo at but workable with a fork. The chicken is 808-280-3386 or fax to 808-244-0446. boneless, thigh pieces tender and crisp with caramelized barbecue char To sha share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/dining27 mt.hy For m more foodie news, visit MauiTimeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s food blog at: MauiT mauidish.com mau

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16 August 5, 2010

en Tommy Lau Heeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Chick

Hekka

by Anu Yagi

Music Scene

anu@mauitime.com + @anuyagi on Twitter

Thorne Branches Out Celtic Tigers’ front-man releases personal, ‘ohana-inspired solo album

Kisses,” “As Good As It Gets,” “The Flood,” “I-485” Release party: Friday, August 6, 7:30pm at Mulligan’s on the Blue, 874-1131

T

o think that musician Murray Thorne might have ended up as a Canadian cabinetmaker hurts like a kiwae spike through the slippah of my Maui-music-loving soul. Sure, his early career choice might have made some north of the border kitchenistas happy, but our local scene would be missing some of its essential spice.

Happily for us, Thorne is the type who can’t help but heed the call to rock—and has come to call our no ka oi rock home. He’s the kind of guy you’d half-expect to bleed black notes from wounds inflicted by the voracity of his own chops, while carrying an effortless front-man demeanor topped with locks that seem to spike themselves. Though perhaps best recognized as the intrepidly piped six-stringer for the beloved Celtic Tigers, Thorne is returning to his rock roots with his latest album, Tin Can Telephone.

A CD release party is slated for this Friday (though Tigers fans ought fear not, as this solo endeavor is no disembarkation from Thorne’s Celtic claim to fame).

Thorne promises it will be an all-rock and roll spectacle of unforgettable proportion, adding that host venue (and regular Tigers’ den) Mulligan’s on the Blue will be transformed into a “concert hall.”

Completed months ago, the disc had a soft drop last fall. Whereas you might have heard Thorne perform solo, acoustic versions of his 11-track release, Friday’s show is the first opportunity audiences will have to hear the album in all its live rock-band glory.

“It got its own momentum somehow,” says Thorne. “There was a lag for a few months, where I wondered what to do with the album. I just started making phone calls, and once I did, things just steamrolled.”

Gathering to him a crew of talented names that will be familiar to local listeners, the newly formed Murray Thorne Band lineup includes Tom Conway, Paul Marchetti, Toby Couture, Wolf and Eric Helmkamp. The night’s festivities begin with opening sets by Mary Jane Babashoff and fellow Mau-“ay” (sorry) rocker Erin Smith.

Thorne says the release party for the record came together through a pleasantly “weird chain of events,” and that the album

itself was equally organic.

“I’ve always been a songwriter, but rarely—and only in the last couple years— have I been able to get out there and play my own stuff,” says Thorne. “It was really the result of people coming out, digging my solo shows and wanting to hear more of it that fueled me more.”

Writing is a constant for Thorne, who says actually creating the material was not nearly as time-consuming as producing it—especially when doing so independently—and constantly reimagining every highly-layered detail. “A big part of it all is the fact that it became accessible and feasible to have a home studio,” says Thorne. “I was able to make a good-sounding album without having to go out and spend thousands of dollars a day in a studio.” Thorne says being immersed in a community of musician friends, including legendary producer Bob Rock, taught him “how to do it right.”

When it comes to learning how to do it right, Thorne’s the first to say he’s had a fortunate and thorough education.

PHOTO BY PIETRO ORTIZ

New album: Tin Can Telephone Essential tracks: “Butterfly

O

ne of Thorne’s first defining musical moments came during high school in hometown Manitoba, Canada, when he and his band mates channeled Kiss, The Knack and Alice Cooper in a talent show-stopper that included sneaky pyrotechnics, a visit from the fire department and a wag of the principal’s finger—in addition to a win. Afterward, he toured with big names across the country while learning vital biz-lessons from the pros.

“I was really lucky for a long time in that I was getting gigs [and] touring with amazing people that had iconic backgrounds,” recalls Thorne.

“In the end, it served me well,” says Thorne of his “fly on the wall” sideman stints. “Had I not learned those lessons—the valuable insight from meeting record execs, managers, movers and shakers and longtime industry people—I might have made some bad decisions and wound up broke and poor on the road somewhere instead of on Maui with friends and family.”

Thorne says the decision to re-root on the Valley Isle in the late-’90s was easy. “I wasn’t really leaving anything behind,” he says. “I was in Vancouver at the time, and the bottom of the music scene was falling out badly.” Also at the time, Rock was building his Maui studio, and by the connection of Thorne’s longtime collaborator Eric Helmkamp, the invitation was extended to “help labor building [Rock’s] studio.” Thorne obliged and never looked back.

N

ow a North Shore family man with a wife and eight-year-old son (who stars in the music video for “Sally Blue,” on YouTube), Thorne’s overall experiences have given him an unflappable, real-world perspective on what it takes to have a music career in this modern, changing market.

Also ‘ohana-inspired is his album’s title.

“When you have a kid, it changes your perspective on everything,” he says. “You think you’ve got the world figured out until you hear their perspective. They’re so good at telling the truth. Before they’re taught to think a certain way, there are no walls—it’s so untouched and pure. So the significance behind Tin Can Telephone is, if you could talk to yourself as a child, what advice would that child give you?”

For Thorne, the best lyrics come from that internal communication with his truer self.

“When you’re just trying to put together words that sound cool, it never works,” he says, adding that he always expects more out of lyricism, especially his own.

While there are many notable gems— Thorne saying he favors each of them for different reason—I can’t help but be partial to the quirky closing track “I-485”—a grainy ukulele ditty that while too-short (only 51 seconds) quickly burrowed into my brain. Its lyrics easily skip off the tongue if you’re inclined to sing along: “I am just an immigrant / trying to belong / in a place where no one’s innocent / in a place where no one’s wrong.” The melody then fades into the sound bite of the crackle and pop of the last inner edge of a vinyl B-side, at which point your Pavlovian instincts kick in and you’re ready to repeat the disc.

It’s just the sort of thing Thorne says he hopes might resonate most with listeners—a personal connection to the substance of lyrics and appreciation for the technical depth of the music. Tin Can Telephone accomplishes all that, much better than cabinets ever could. ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1407m

August 5, 2010 17

Film Critique

by Barry Wurst II barry@mauitime.com

Buddy, Buddy Past-cliché genre gets an unexpected shot in the arm The Other Guys

★★★★★

Rated PG13/107 min.

H

igh-concept buddy comedies always seem like they can’t miss, until you see the final result. We know that Mel Gibson and Danny Glover worked as a team of oddly paired cops and, just as surprisingly, so did Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker. On the other hand, we will never see Chris Rock and Anthony Hopkins packing heat and trading quips again. Most disappointing was the woeful Showtime, where Robert De Niro and Eddie Murphy appeared stranded in an action comedy without laughs or excitement. One of the reasons Adam Mckay’s The Other Guys works so well is that it understands this genre and has fun surprising the audience with riffs on every action-movie cliché.

New York’s most celebrated super cops (played by Samuel L. Jackson and Dwayne Johnson) tear up the city, while the timid

18 August 5, 2010

Allen (Will Ferrell) and short-fused Terry (Mark Wahlberg) are stuck at their desks, the laughing stock of the precinct. When the two get a lead on their first big case, they discover they need one another more than they realized. Again, it’s formulaic, but it’s the way they play off the formula that makes it work.

Mckay directed Ferrell in Anchorman, Talladega Nights and Step Brothers, but this is their funniest collaboration so far.

Ferrell rarely stretches outside of his fratboy persona, and that’s a good thing—he’s at his best when he’s firmly in character.

Wahlberg is fantastic, riffing on his Oscarnominated role from The Departed and giving a breakout comic performance. Ferrell and Wahlberg seem utterly mismatched on the surface, until you see how Ferrell’s offthe-wall dorkiness bounces off Wahlberg’s hilariously serious dead panning. Meanwhile, Johnson and Jackson are such a fun pair to watch, it’s odd that no one thought to put them together until now. Eva Mendes is perfect playing a character too funny to give away, Michael Keaton is on a roll in another

Time for the good cop, stupid cop routine.

scene-stealing turn and, yes, Yankee great Derek Jeter somehow figures into the plot.

The opening set piece and all of the smash ‘em up action sequences are as flashy and spectacular as anything from Michael Bay, but are funneled through a truly warped sense of humor. It’s a little too long and the tone becomes inconsistent towards the end (there are scenes where you wonder if the filmmakers forgot they were making a spoof of cop movies and not the real thing). However, the first 90 minutes are a relentless laugh machine and the humor goes well beyond the back and forth banter of the leads. In fact, there are times—such as a sequence involving Ferrell’s ex-girlfriend

and her creepy husband—where the jokes become inventively strange. We’re treated to odd but hysterical jabs at musical theater, ‘90s pop group TLC and Andrew Lloyd Webber (!).

After the hit and mostly miss Dinner for Schmucks, here’s the most quotable comedy of the summer. Be sure to sit through the end credits, which offer: A. a lesson on the history of the Ponzi scheme; B. a funny outtake at the very end; and C. the chance to hear Mendes sing the soonto-be classic “Pimps Don’t Cry.” ■ To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1407f

Film Capsules

NEW THIS WEEK CYRUS - R - Comedy - It’s your classic tale of boy meets girl. Only this time, girl has creepy adult son. Jonah Hill, John C. Reilly and Marissa Tomei star. 92 min.

STEP UP (3D) - PG13 - Drama - Interchangeable, tight-bodied dancer/”actors” gyrate provocatively.

In an extra dimension. 97 min.

THE OTHER GUYS - PG13 - Comedy - Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg are mismatched cops who play by their own (ridiculous) rules. See this week’s Film Critique for more. 107 min.

THE SERVANT - NR - Drama, Foreign - Korean import about a noble who takes a young man under his wing, where, it turns out, a seductress also resides. 124 min.

NOW SHOWING CATS & DOGS: THE REVENGE OF KITTY GALORE - PG - Adventure - Talking cats and dogs unite their uber-techie forces against an evil-doer feline. Chris O’Donnell and Alec Baldwin so slumming. 82 min.

CHARLIE ST. CLOUD - PG13 - Drama - Pretty boy (Zac Efron) falls in love with pretty girl (Amanda Crew), threatening his pretty weird relationship with his dead brother. Sail boats. 109 min.

DESPICABLE ME (3D) - PG - Family, Animated An evil genius adopts some cute kids and hilarity allegedly ensues. Steve Carrell takes a break from witty comedy to lend his voice. 88 min.

DINNER FOR SCHMUCKS - PG13 - Comedy Steve Carell, Paul Rudd and Zach Galifianakis have more to worry about than which fork to use. 110 min.

GROWN UPS - PG13 - Comedy - A large chunk of the early ‘90s SNL cast (led by the most successful alumni, Adam Sandler and Chris Rock) reunite for a feel-good family comedy liberally sprinkled with bodily function jokes. 117 min.

INCEPTION - PG13 - Thriller - Leo DiCaprio and the chick from Juno invade people’s dreams in the latest mind-bender from director Christopher Nolan. 147 min.

THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT - R - Comedic Drama Teens from a two-mom ‘ohana seek their sperm donor dad (Mark Ruffalo). 104 min.

THE LAST AIRBENDER (3D) - Fantasy - M. Night Shyamalan directs this epic about a young man who rises to meet his destiny and fight off an invading horde of supernatural baddies before Haley Joel Osment shows up and reveals he’s been a ghost all along. 94 min.

RAMONA AND BEEZUS - G - Family - Beverly Cleary’s classic book of sisterly misadventure gets flick-ified for whole-family fun. 104 min.

S H O W T I M E S FRONT STREET THEATER 900 Front Street, Lahaina, 249-2222 (Matinees: M-F until 6:30pm, Sa-Su until 3:30pm, Discount Tue) CHARLIE ST. CLOUD - PG - FRI 4:15, 6:45, 9:15. SAT-SUN 1:30, 4:15, 7:00, 9:45. MON-THU 4:15, 6:45, 9:15.

DESPICABLE ME - PG - FRI 4:00, 6:30, 9:00. SAT-SUN 1:30, 4:00, 6:30, 9:00. MON-THU 4:00, 6:30, 9:00.

DINNER FOR SCHMUCKS - PG13 - FRI 4:15, 7:00, 9:45. SAT-SUN 1:30, 4:15, 7:00, 9:45. MONTHU 4:15, 7:00, 9:45.

SALT - PG13 - FRI 4:45, 7:15, 9:45. SAT-SUN 2:15, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45. MON-THU 4:45, 7:15, 9:45.

KA’AHUMANU 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center. 1-800-326-3264 (Matinees: everyday until 4pm) DESPICABLE ME - PG - FRI-SAT 11:30, 1:40, 3:50, 6:00, 8:10, 10:20. SUN-THU 11:30, 1:40, 3:50, 6:00, 8:10.

GROWN UPS - PG13 - FRI-SAT 11:10, 1:25, 3:40, 5:55, 8:15, 10:25. SUN-THU 11:10, 1:25, 3:40, 5:55, 8:15.

THE OTHER GUYS - R - FRI-TUES 11:45, 2:10, 3:10, 4:35, 5:35, 7:00, 8:00, 9:25, 10:25. WEDTHU 11:00, 11:45, 12:45, 2:10, 3:10, 4:35, 5:35, 7:00, 8:00, 9:25, 10:25.

STEP UP - PG13 - FRI-THU 12:05, 2:25, 4:45, 7:05 STEP UP (3D) - PG13 - FRI-THU 10:45, 1:05, 3:25, 5:45, 8:05, 10:25

KUKUI MALL 1819 South Kihei Road, 1-800-326-3264 (Matinees: everyday until 4pm) CATS AND DOGS: THE REVENGE OF KITTY GALORE - G - FRI-SUN 11:00, 1:00, 3:00, 5:00.

MON-THU 1:00, 3:00, 5:00.

DINNER FOR SCHMUCKS - PG13 - FRI-SAT 11:30, 2:00, 4:30, 7:15, 9:45. SUN 11:30, 2:00, 4:30, 7:15. MON-THU 1:00, 3:30, 6:00, 8:30. MON-THU 1:00, 3:30, 6:00, 8:30.

INCEPTION - PG13 - FRI-SAT 7:00, 10:00. SUN-THU 7:00.

THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT - R - FRI-SAT 12:10, 2:30, 4:50, 7:15, 9:35. SUN 12:10, 2:30, 4:50, 7:15. MON-THU 1:05, 3:25, 5:50, 8:05.

SALT - PG13 - FRI-SAT 11:00, 1:15, 3:30, 5:45, 8:00, 10:15. SUN 11:00, 1:15, 3:30, 5:45, 8:00.

MON-THU 1:15, 3:30, 5:45, 8:00.

MAUI MALL MEGAPLEX Maui Mall, 249-2222 (Matinees: M-Th until 6pm, F-Su until 3:30pm) CATS AND DOGS: THE REVENGE OF KITTY GALORE - G - FRI-SUN 12:00, 2:10, 4:20. MON-THU 2:10, 4:20.

CATS AND DOGS: THE REVENGE OF KITTY GALORE (3D) - G - FRI-SUN 12:45, 2:5, 5:05, 7:15, 9:25. MON-THU 2:55, 5:05, 7:15, 9:25. MON-THU 2:55, 5:05, 7:15, 9:25.

CHARLIE ST. CLOUD - PG - FRI-SUN 11:45, 2:10, 4:35, 7:00, 9:25. MON-THU 2:10, 4:35, 7:00, 9:25.

CYRUS - R - FRI-SUN 12:30, 2:50, 5:10, 7:30, 9:50. MON-THU 2:50, 5:10, 7:30, 9:30.

DINNER FOR SCHMUCKS - PG13 - FRI-SUN 1:40, 4:20, 6:30, 7:00, 9:10, 9:40. MON-THU 1:40, 4:20, 6:30, 7:00, 9:10, 9:40.

INCEPTION - PG13 - FRI-SUN 1:30, 4:45, 8:00. MON-THU 1:30, 4:45, 8:00.

THE LAST AIRBENDER (3D) - PG - FRI-SUN 11:45, 2:15, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45. MON-THU 2:15, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45.

RAMONA AND BEEZUS - G - FRI-SUN 11:30, 2:00, 4:30. MON-THU 2:00, 4:30.

SALT - PG13 - FRI-SUN 12:20, 2:45, 5:10, 7:35, 10:00. MON-THU 2:45, 5:10, 7:35, 10:00.

THE SERVANT - R - FRI-SUN 2:00, 5:00, 8:00. MON-THU 2:00, 5:00, 8:00.

SORCERER’S APPRENTICE - G - FRI-SUN 1:50, 4:25, 7:00, 9:35. MON-THU 1:50, 4:25, 7:00, 9:35.

TOY STORY 3 (3D) - G - FRI-SUN 11:30, 2:05, 4:40, 7:15, 9:50. MON-THU 2:05, 4:40, 7:15, 9:50.

TWILIGHT SAGA: ECLIPSE - PG13 - FRI-SUN 7:00, 9:50. MON-THU 7:00, 9:50.

WHARF CINEMA CENTER 658 Front Street, 249-2222 (Matinees: Tue all shows, until 6pm every other day) CATS AND DOGS: THE REVENGE OF KITTY GALORE - G - FRI 1:45, 4:15, 6:45, 9:15. SAT-SUN 1:45, 4:15, 6:45, 9:15. MON-THU 1:45, 4:15, 6:45, 9:15.

INCEPTION - PG13 - FRI 1:30, 4:45, 8:00. SAT-SUN 1:30, 4:45, 8:00. MON-THU 1:30, 4:45, 8:00.

THE OTHER GUYS - R - FRI 2:00, 4:30, 7:00, 9:00. SAT-SUN 2:00, 4:30, 7:00, 9:30. MON-THU 2:00, 4:30, 7:00, 9:30.

Compiled by JENN BROWN

Just when you thought things couldn’t get creepier. (Cyrus)

SALT - PG13 - Suspense - Angelina is again allaction for a flick not for the faint of heart. 99 min.

THE SORCERER’S APPRENTICE - PG - Action, Fantasy - Hey, remember that part in Fantasia where Mickey Mouse makes all the mops come to life? They made it into an action movie starring Nicolas Cage. Wait, is this a dream?

Where’s Leo? 107 min.

TOY STORY 3 (3D) - G - Family, Animated - The latest from the wizards at Pixar has Buzz, Woody and the gang trying to survive life at a daycare center, which is like Hostel for toys. 108 min.

TWILIGHT SAGA: ECLIPSE - PG13 - Fantasy Shirtless werewolves? Sparkly vampires? Long, angsty stares? You had me at Twilight. 124 min.

August 5, 2010 19

Picks

This Week's Picks First Friday & Dolphin Sculpting The monthly Wailuku First Friday event puts a polish on a town that I once (and best) heard described as “a diamond in the rough.” Festivities have expanded from Market to Main Street. This month’s “Endless Summer” theme includes Basic Bounce performing at the Main Street Promenade, Gene and Shea Argel in front of and Jim Powlan inside of Café O’Lei, Head High at the Banyan Tree Park and Gabe & Friends at the Wailuku Coffee Company. Plus, don’t miss the Poetry Slam at Gallerie Ha, the Dino Miranda art showcase at Maui Thing and (if it’s your thing) the Spanish wine tasting and paella, also at Café O’Lei. Too, the Iao Theater hosts the fourth and final installment of their “4 Funny Films” series.

Screening Mel Brooks’s Blazing Saddles—starring Cleavon Little, Gene Wilder, Medeline Kahn, Slim Pickens, Harvey Korman and Mel Brooks—the show is preceded by a panel discussion (yours truly, somehow included) and other fun surprises.

The event officially begins Friday (August 6) at 5:30pm—continuing through to 8pm (so there’s still time to jet West for Tom Green’s standup)—with Market Street closed to traffic at 6pm (thanks, MPD!) and film screening at 7pm. Best of all, it’s all free… [1stFridayWailuku@gmail.com; 878-1888 event info, 249-9710 booth info] If all that Friday night fun whets your appetite for more, sail south on Saturday morning for the Pacific Whale Foundation’s famed Wild Dolphin Sand Sculpture Contest. Registration is free and sculptors can compete individually or in groups.

The PWF’s got swell prizes for winners (and free wild dolphin guides for all participants). Categories include “Best Overall Entry by a Family or Group,” “Best Individual or Group Kids,” (for keiki 12 and under), “Most Realistic Dolphin,” “Most Creative Entry” and “Funniest Entry.” Arrive early to register at Keawakapu Beach, in front of the Mana Kai Beach Resort; the competition runs from 9-11am and prizes will be announced at 11:45am. [249-8811, pacificwhale.org]

NEWE! DAT

SATURDAY, AUG. 7TH SAT

20 August 5, 2010

by Anu Yagi calendar@mauitime.com

Mos, Moth & Mozart PHOTO BY YVETTE YVELLE

Mmm. So many fine entertainment choices this week! Whatever your fancy, there’s a fo’ shua show for you on Saturday (August 7). Originally scheduled for late July, the long-awaited Maui Celebrity Series Mos Def concert dawns (though the postponement was at least good news for fans who needed more time to save up mullah for the tickets). There will most definitely be a fair amount of boogieing, so if you go so far as to follow Mos’s co-starring role in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and want to bring a towel to mop up your sweat, you’ll likely make friends instead of being made fun of. [9:30pm, Maui Theatre, Lahaina, $55 / $75 / $125, mauicelebrityseries.com] If you’re looking for lightning licks rather than the spit of rhymes, check out Moth at Stella Blues. Joining this progressive pair (they’re a two man band, but close your eyes and their huge sound is wildly deceptive) will be Order of the White Rose (cute, but not from Connecticut) and Owaila. [10pm, Stella Blues, Kihei, $7, stellablues.com / 874-3779] Also masterful, albeit more mellow, is Musical Voices Maui’s presentation of the Mozart Requiem. It’s the first-ever Summer Masterworks Festival, and under the direction of Robert E. Wills the 62-member chorale and 25-piece orchestra are sure to delight. [7pm, Kihei Baptist Chapel, $15, info@musicalvoicesmaui.org / 270-3066]

DJ Ray & Tiki Lounge Pin-Ups DJ Ray Masters—a decade-long veteran of the North Shore dance scene—is turning up the tunes at Moana Café (MauiTime’s reader pick for Best Open Mic Night), with his trademark “European sensibility and Miami style glamor.” Every three weeks, he hosts a sexy, themed party titled “Ray’s House” (because he spins house music and the café has come to feel like home). This Friday, channel the buzz of downtown Tokyo with “The Sushi Mushi Dance Party” by dressing up like a glamorous geisha and indulging in the sushi bar, open until midnight… [Friday, August 6, 9:30pm-2am, Moana Café, Paia, $10 cover, moanacafe.com, 579-9999] If you’re still keen on costuming, bus’ out your best pin-up girl threads for “a naughty night of retro style vintage love” at South Shore Tiki Lounge (a multi-award winner in this year’s BOM). The whole locale will be adorned with pin-up perfect art by Rachel G, Yvette Yvelle, Francis Halloran, and Teddi Martinez, while Island Girl Pin-Ups, teaming up with Bohemia Boutique, unveil stunning makeovers. Should you be so inspired, pose with, in or on a 1950s Ford Thunderbird and 1929 Ford Woody Wagon (thanks to Maui Classic Cruisers), all to the tunes of Cudra Clover and Kanoa. [Sunday, August 8, 8pm, South Shore Tiki Lounge, 874-6444]

DAY WILD WAHINE WEDNES NIGHT CASANOVA’S FAMOUS LADIES

Q103 & THE BIG HAWAIIAN present DJ STYLZ MUSIC STARTS AT 10PM X $10 COVER

THURSDAY, AUG.5

TH

FLAMENCO NIGHTS

INDIO & LOS ELEMENTOS

.6TH FRIDAY, AUGNTS HOUSE OF ROOTS PRESE

B.U.B.Z RIDDIM SEKTION

THE EVENING THAT EARNED CASANOVA THE AWARDS

“BEST LATE NIGHT IN MAUI” “BEST SINGLES SCENE IN MAUI”

SHOW STARTS AT 9:00PM $10 COVER SPECIAL DANCE PERFORMANCE

BY VANESSA & ROSALIND SHOW STARTS AT 9:45PM $10 COVER TEOMON X HAYLEY X RAN D SHOW STARTS AT 9:45PM $10 COVER

.7TH SATURDAY, AUG PRESENTS

DJ BLAST

CHILLTOWN PRODUCTION

ULT IMATE ‘90s

VOTED MAUI’S BEST DJ

SHOW STARTS AT 2PM X $10 DONATION A BENEFIT FROM THE FRIENDS OF RENEE ALONZO HANA’S OWN

SUNDAY, AUG.8TH DANNY ESTOCADO &

TUESDAY, TH .10 AUGUST $10 COVER AT 9PM X

WILLIE KD & HIS BAN

MAKE IT A MEMORABLE EVENING IN MAKAWAO TOWN. DINE AND DANCE AT CASANOVA. FOR DINNER RESERVATIONS

CALL 572-0220 X

August 5, 2010 21

Calendar

by Anu Yagi calendar@mauitime.com

Da Kine Calendar BIG SHOWS

FOODIE

MURRAY THORNE’S CD RELEASE PARTY - Fri, Aug 6. A grand rock & roll spectacle celebrating Thorne’s “Tin Can Telephone” album. See this week’s Music Scene for more. $10 advance / $12 door. 7:30 p.m. Mulligan’s on the Blue, 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea; 808-874-1131; mulligansontheblue.com

WINE DINNER FRIDAY - Fri, Aug 6. Lahaina Coolers Restaurant & bar will be hosting Wine Dinner Friday.

Food will be served in three courses with fantastic wine pairings. There is limited space, RSVP by calling. $40. 7-9:30 p.m. Lahaina Coolers, 180 Dickenson St., Lahaina; 808-661-7082; www.lahainacoolers.com

TOM GREEN - Fri, Aug 6. Put your bum in whatever position it needs to be (car seat, computer chair, telephone booth) to get you and your friends tickets to Tom Green. With special guests Brian Evans, Sunny Dennis and King Martin. $39.95 / $59.95 / $79.95. 9:30 p.m. Maui Theatre, 878 Front St. (Old Lahaina Center), Lahaina; 808-661-9913; mauitheatre.com / ticketmaster.com

KAMA’AINA MONDAYS - Mon, Jul 5. In celebrating our one year anniversary, David Paul’s is offering 50% off all entrees. Hawaii I.D. Required. Every Monday. 50 % off all Entrees. David Paul’s Island Grill, 900 Front St. Suite A101, Lahaina; 808-6623000; http://www.davidpaulsislandgrill.com

SUMMER MASTERWORKS FESTIVAL - Sat, Aug 7.

The first year in what will with any luck become a Maui mainstay. Performing the Mozart Requiem are a 62-member chorale and 25-piece orchestra. See This Week’s Picks. $15 suggested donation. 7 p.m.

Kihei Baptist Chapel, 1655 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 808270-3066; info@mauimusicalvoices.org

TACO TUESDAYS - Tue, Jul 13. Spice up the week.

Variety of $4 tacos. 3-5 p.m. Leilani’s On The Beach, Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pkwy. Bldg. J, Ka’anapali; (808) 661-4495; www.leilanis.com GIRLS NIGHT OUT - Tue. Featuring vendors,door prizes, drink specials and a four course fondue extravaganza. $35 per person. 5-9 p.m. The Melting Pot, 325 Keawe St., Ste. A202, Lahaina; (808) 6616181; http://www.meltingpot.com

MOS DEF - Sat, Aug 7. Don’t you feel lucky to have had a little extra time to save up for the show? So now that you have, go. Most definitely go. $55 / $75 / $125. 9:30 p.m. Maui Theatre, 878 Front St. (Old Lahaina Center), Lahaina; 808-661-9913; mauitheatre.com

LAHAINA GRILL TURNS 20 - Tue. On the 20th of every month in 2010, come into Lahaina Grill for 50% off all entrees for Kama’aina. Just show valid Hawaii ID. 50% off. Lahaina Grill, 127 Lahainaluna Rd., Lahaina; (808) 667-5117; http://www.lahainagrill.com

MOTH - Sat, Aug 7. A big show for a small band with a huge sound. Joined by Order of the White Rose and Owaila. $7. 10 p.m. Stella Blues Cafe, 1279 South Kihei Rd., # 201, Kihei; 808-874-3779; stellablues.com LEDWARD KAAPANA - Wed, Aug 11. Masters of Hawaiian Music Slack Key Show. $39.99. 7:30 p.m.

Napili Kai Beach Resort, 5900 L. Honoapiilani Rd., Napili; 808-669-6271; napilikai.com

KEIKI IN THE KITCHEN AT WHOLE FOODS - Tue. The popularity of the culinary arts is not just limited to grownups. Classes are perfect for children 5 to 12 years old. Class includes demonstrations on handson easy meal preparations that the entire family can enjoy. Free. 11 a.m. Whole Foods Market, 70 Kaahumanu Ave #B,, Kahului; (808) 872-3310; http://www. wholefoodsmarket.com/stores/maui/

STAGE

TICKETS ON SALE

BLAZING SADDLES - Fri, Aug 6. Fourth and final installment of the theater’s “4 Funny Films” series. Join in on the panel discussion preceding this progressive 1974 film, starring Cleavon Little, Gene Wilder, Medeline Kahn, Slim Pickens, Harvey Korman and Mel Brooks. . Free. 7 p.m. Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku; 808-242-6969; mauionstage.com

MAUI CALLS - Fri, Aug 13. This annual MACC benefit gala features gourmet dishes prepared on site

by Hawai’is top chefs, fine wine tasting, live musical entertainment and dancing, silent and live auctions, and door prize drawings. $175-$500. 6-10 p.m.

Events Lawn, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org

CIRQUE POLYNESIA - Mon-Sat. It’s Circue du Soleil meets Polynesian hula with amazing high-wire acts, aerial acrobatics and illusions, and mind-boggling contortionist and balancing-acts. Call for their Kama’aina special. Starting at $62; Deals for kids. 6 p.m. Hyatt Regency Maui Resort & Spa, 200 Nohea Kai Dr., Kaanapali; 808-667-4540; hmaui.hyatt.com

MOTOWN ON MAUI - Sun, Aug 15. Legendary Motown sensations, The Temptations and The Four Tops are a special double-billing for this hot summer night. For decades, these artists have been crooning and charming their way into the history books and our hearts. $35 / $50 / $65 / $85 / $125. 7 p.m. Events Lawn, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org

22 August 5, 2010

D.L. HUGHLEY - King of the Castle - Sun, Aug 15. From the Original Kings of Comedy, The Hughleys and Russell Simmons’ Def Comedy Jam, DL keeps the crowd roaring with his hilarious take on politics, childhood, gluttony, impotence, drugs, parenthood, and more. $39 - $79. 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Wy., Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org GASP. AIR SUPPLY ON MAUI - Sat, Aug 21. An evening of nostalgic bliss filled with captivating love songs. Tickets go on sale to MACC Members on Friday (July 16) at 10am and will be on sale to the general public on Saturday (July 24). A BAMP Project Production. $35 / $55 / $65 / $85 (plus applicable fees). 7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Wy., Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org ULUWEHI GUERRERO CONCERT - Sat, Sep 4. Kaulupono Music proudly presents Maui’s own Kumu Hula and Na Hoku Hanohano Awar-Winning male Vocalist Uluwehi Guerrero and Halu Hula Kauluokala in “Na Mele O Ku’u Pu’uwai,” Songs of My Heart. $25-$40.

7:30 p.m. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Wy., Kahului; 808-242-7469; mauiarts.org

ANNOUNCEMENTS WANTED: ARTISTS: MAUI CRAFTS GUILD - The gallery features ceramics, basket-weaving, textiles, jewelry, glass, woodwork and other crafts. However, ceramics or jewelry are not being accepted at this time. Visit the gallery to fill out an application and submit artwork. Maui Crafts Guild, 69 Hana Hwy., Paia; 808-579-9697; mauicraftsguild.com ARTISTS, VENDORS AND MUSICIANS, OH MY - The Wailuku First Friday event planning hui is trying out an expanded location and offering free spaces for artists, vendors and musicians. Interested? Contact Teri at iftheshoefits1@hawaiiantel.net. Free. Wailuku First Friday, Market St., Wailuku; 808-249-9710 HAWAIIAN ALLIANCE - Na Kupuna O Maui is taking private appointments for Hawaiian Alliance. People whose homes are in danger of foreclosure are encouraged to call Aunty Patty Nishiyama. Free. 808-281-1567 SUPPORT THE KO`IE`IE FISHPOND AND BID. BID. BID. - Daily. Support the `Ao`ao O Na Loko I`a O Maui (Assn. of the Fishponds of Maui) by bidding on items at eBay’s Giving Works, designated for the group.

Items include rounds of golf, snorkel tours, local gift certificates and fine art.; givingworks.ebay.com

EVENTS THURSDAY, AUG 05 MIRACLE TREAT DAY - Visit a participating Maui Dairy Queen today. At least $1 from every Blizzard purchased will be donated to Kapiolani Childrens

Miracle Network. 9:30 a.m.-9 p.m. Dairy Queen Lahaina Cannery Mall, 1221 Honoapiilani Hiway, Lahaina; miracletreatday.com THURSDAY NIGHT YOUTH GROUP - Get together at Hope Chapel North Shore in the Haiku Cannery for a time of food, fun and fellowship. If you are between 9-18 then this is the place to come and make quality friends. Free. Hope Chapel North Shore, 810 Haiku Rd, Haiku; 808-575-2650; hopechapelnorthshore.org ONSITE CORAL REEF NATURALIST PROGRAM Learn names of fish you¹ve seen while snorkeling and how to protect Maui¹s reefs at Pacific Whale Foundation¹s free Coral Reef Information Station.

Sponsored by Hawaii Tourism Authority. 9 a.m.-12 p.m. Ulua Beach, Wailea, Between the Renaissance Wailea Resort and the Wailea Marriott Re, Wailea; 808-249-8811 ext. 1; pacificwhale.org

FRIDAY, AUG 06 HIROSHIMA REMEMBERANCE - Maui Peace Action presents a special program featuring keynote speaker Kyle Kajihiro. Free. 6 p.m. University of Hawaii Maui, 310 Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului; 808-9843500; maui.hawaii.edu/ KARAOKE WITH ELEINA - Sing a tune onstage.

Free. 6 p.m. Maui Mall, 70 E. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului; 808-871-1307; mauimall.com MEMBERS’ OPENING - Not a Hui member? Join!

Then, enjoy the special opening of “The Politics of Paper/ Many Stories, Many Voices.” The show will include work by resident artists Favianna Rodriguez and Orlando Reyes, alongside their students’ work. Free. 6 p.m. Hui No’eau Visual Arts Center, 2841 Baldwin Ave., Makawao; 808-572-6560; huinoeau.com ISLAND RHYTHMS SUNSET COCKTAIL CRUISE - Join Pacific Whale Foundation for very special whalewatch cruise, featuring cocktails, appetizers, and music, hosted by local reggae star Marty Dread. $49.95. 5-7 p.m. Pacific Whale Foundation’s Discovery Center, 300 Ma’alaea Rd., Ste. 211, Wailuku; 808-249-8811 ext. 1; pacificwhale.org/ecocruises WO HING MUSEUM AFTER DARK - Let the lights from the Wo Hing Museum draw you in for its special Friday hours of 1 to 8pm. With its usual day time hours 10am to 4pm, visitors have the unique opportunity to visit the museum and temple at night. $2 General Admission, Kids 12 and under free. 1-8 p.m.

Wo Hing Temple Museum, 858 Front St., Lahaina; 808-661-3262; lahainarestoration.org ONSITE CORAL REEF NATURALIST PROGRAM Learn names of fish you¹ve seen while snorkeling and how to protect Maui¹s reefs at Pacific Whale

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

8/05

8/06

8/07

8/08

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

8/09 - 8/11

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

ALE HOUSE

The Crunch Pups 7-10pm; No Cover

Flashback Fridays 9pm; $10

UFC

Boat Night w/ DJ Jammin J; 10pm

TUES - Ladies Night w/ Bad Kitty 8 - 11pm

AMBROSIA

Old School Thursdays w/ DJ Del Sol, 10pm

Departure Lounge w/ Special Guest DJ Nadi, 10pm

Sunrize Saturdays w/ DJ Decka, 10pm

Happy Hour Sundays w/ DJ CIA 10pm

MON - Erin Smith /TUE - Drum & Bass w/ DJ AstroRaph; WED - Maui’s HI-5 Night w/ DJ Del Sol & DJ CIA

Official After Party w/ Tom Green & Camp Savage

Official After Party w/ Mos Def & Camp Savage Danny Estocado & Hana’s Own, $5 donation

TUE - Willie K, 9-11pm; $10 WED - Ladies Night, 10pm-1am; $10

355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

1913 S. Kihei Road, Kihei - 891-1011

BUBBA GUMP SHRIMP CO. 889 Front St., Lahaina - 661-3111

CASANOVA

Flamenco Night w/ Indio & Los Elementos, 9pm-12am; $10

B.U.B.Z. w/ Riddim Sektion; 10pm-1am; $10

Ultimate ‘90s with DJ Blast; 10pm-1am; $10

CHARLEY’S

Wavetrain 10 pm ; $5

Riddum of Knowledge & Sounds of Jah, 10-Close; $8

Teomon w/ The Kryptones & The Unsung Mighty Few

Barefoot Minded 7 - 10pm; No Cover

Dave Caroll 7 - 10pm; No Cover

Dave Caroll 7 - 10pm; No Cover

Erin Smith 7 - 10pm; No Cover

MON - Peter D / TUE - Live Jazz / WED - Ryan Palma (All sets 7 - 10pm; No Cover)

Alternative Night w/ DJ Ralph

Live Music

Roots Judgement 9:30pm; No Cover

Gina Martenilli / Arise

MON - Gomega / TUE - Open Mic Night / WED - House Mic Night

Quiz Night / DJ Chrest 8pm; No Cover

Jarod 10pm; No Cover

Ka’ena Elaban & David Bailey; 10pm; No Cover

Sunday Funday

MON - Jordan; TUE - Ka’ena Elaban WED - Jessica & Friend (All 10pm; No Cover)

‘Ohana Groove

Estee & Company

Curt Lee

WED - Latino, Blues & Jazz Night

Karaoke

Kanaka Jams No Cover

UFC

Karaoke

TUE - Pool Tournament WED - Ladies Night / DJ Dance Party

Bad Kitty 8pm; No Cover

Kanaka Jam 7pm; No Cover

Junior Lacuesta / Rampage, 9pm-Close

Rick Glencross / Dat Guyz, 9pm - Close

1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

142 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8085

COOL CAT CAFE

Wharf Cinema, Lahaina - 667-0908

DIAMONDS ICE BAR

1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-9299

DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB 1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 875-9669

GIAN DON’S

1445 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-4041

GREEN LEAF SPORTS BAR 1088 Lower Main St., Wailuku - 244-4888

HANG LOOSE LOUNGE 333 Dairy Rd., Kahalui - 877-6284

HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-8010

900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

515 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-8199

TUE - The Crunch Pups; 9pm / WED - Kenny Roberts; 7:30pm Ryan Robinson & Wolf / Dezman, 9pm - Close

Dan & Ann / Karaoke 8pm - Close

MON - Kahala and Karaoke / TUE - Rick Glencross / WED - Jordan Cudworth and Open Mic Night

Karaoke

MON through WED - Karaoke

Sonido Inspiracion Latina w/ DJ Jammin J, 9:30pm; $7

HARD ROCK CAFE ISANA

TUE - Danyell Alana 10 pm WED - Rack ‘Em Up Wednesdays

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

Foundation¹s free Coral Reef Information Station.

Sponsored by Hawaii Tourism Authority. 9 a.m.-12 p.m. Ulua Beach, Wailea, Between the Renaissance Wailea Resort and the Wailea Marriott Re, Wailea; 808-249-8811 ext. 1; pacificwhale.org

Champ” performances, This Week Maui Model Search, Fashion Show, Trend Stations, and prize giveaways all day. Free. 4-8 p.m. Queen Kaahumanu Shopping Center, 275 W. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului; 808-877-3369; queenkaahumanucenter.com

VIP WILD DOLPHIN ENCOUNTER - A cruise by the Pacific Whale Foundation led by researchers who will help track down dolphins. $49.95. 9 a.m.-11:30 p.m. Lahaina Harbor, 249-8811, ext 1; pacificwhale/ecocruises

VINTAGE CELEBRATION - Fri - Sun. See museum style fashion sketches from 1948 and discover over 3000 vintage items from the 1940s and lots of vanity collectibles. Proceeds benefit breast cancer research. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Hula Gypsy, 505 Front St., Lahaina; 808-280-9914; hulagypsy.com

CLASSIC JAZZ AND 20TH CENTURY MODERNS The final event for Ebb & Flow Arts’ “A Little Summer Music, Please. Featured visiting musicians include San Francisco Symphony’s violinists, Sarn Oliver and Mariko Smile, plus Berkeley pianist, Jerry Kuderna.

Plus, Mauians Kelly Covington, Paul Marchetti, Lenny Castellanos and Shiro Mori. Free. 7:30-9:30 p.m.

Seabury Hall Performing Arts Studio, 480 Olinda Rd., Makawao; 808-876-1854; ebbandflowarts.org

MAKAWAO TOWN JAMBOREE - Sponsored by Makawao Town Merchants Association. Mike Carroll’s Community Service house band, other musicians will play outdoors “under the stars”. Free. 5-8 p.m. across from rodeo general store, 808-357-4943; rc@mauifuturearts.org

WAILUKU TOWN FIRST FRIDAYS - It’s a block party. Come and experience the exciting street festivities and a one-of-a-kind blend of old and new in Wailuku. Groove with bands, shop, dine and enjoy a memorable evening. A walking tour list of events and discounts is available from participating First Friday Wailuku merchants. See This Week’s Picks for more. Free. 5:30-8 p.m. Wailuku Town, North Market St., Wailuku

SATURDAY, AUG 07 OPEN HOUSE - OM Maui Fitness, Curves, Studio 95, and Compassionate Healing will be having free demos, door prizes, food, discounts and drawings. Free. 9 a.m.-3 p.m. Curves, 95 Makwao Ave., Pukalani; 808-572-1701 WILD DOLPHIN SAND SCULPTURE CONTEST Alas, this is but an annual event. And do you really want to wait another year to try your sand sculpting hand at creating a masterpiece? See This Week’s Picks for more. Free. 9-11 a.m. Keawakapu Beach, in front of the Mana Kai Beach Resort, Kihei; 808249-8811; pacificwhale.org SNORKEL CRUISE & DANCE PARTY - Benefits BSN Community Programs Fund, lending financial assistance and guidance to any island ‘ohana who wants to further their LGBT programs or causes.

Board thePacific Whale Foundation’s “Ocean Odyssey” and enjoy pupus and desserts donated by Soup & Nuts Catering. $65. 12:30 p.m. Pacific Whale Foundation’s Ocean Store, 300 Ma’alaea Rd., Ste. 100, Ma’alaea; 808-249-8977; bothsidesnow.org DANCE INTERNATIONAL - Performance. Free.

1 p.m. Maui Mall, 70 E. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului; 808-871-1307; mauimall.com “THE LOOK” BACK-TO-SCHOOL EVENT - “Band

PRO YO SUNDAY MORNING FITNESS CLUB - Get your blood flowing and beach body toned with this free, friendly group motivated to move. Starts with a leisurely jog (or skate or skip or whatever suits you), toward Sprecks and down Stable Road. Cool off with a return swim and discounted smoothie. Free.

7 a.m. Green Banana Cafe, 137 Hana Hwy., Paia; 808-5799130

HALIIMAILE COMMUNITY GARDEN MEMBER ORIENTATION - A place not just to garden and grow food, but also to meet other gardeners, volunteer, and contribute to sustainability projects. Free. 10:30 a.m.-12 p.m. Haliimaile Community Garden; haliimailegarden. com

SOME HERE

ALL ONLINE

VINTAGE CELEBRATION - Fri - Sun. A benefit for breast cancer research.

See Friday’s listings for more. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Hula Gypsy, 505 Front St., Lahaina; 808-280-9914; hulagypsy.com

Calendar Listings on mauitime.com

8TH ANNUAL TIMMY CABRA MEMORIAL ROPING - It’s a funky roping party! Free. 9 a.m. Glen Souza Memorial Arena.

SUNDAY, AUG 08 KANAKA HEKILI 1ST ANNUAL “SHOW ME DA CHILI FEST” - Support our awesome Veterans for Foreign Wars, by joining in on the fun at the hottest chili fest of the year. Entertainment by Bad Kitty, fun games with great prizes and the famous Dunk Tank. Enter your chili and have the chance to win $300.00 for first place (judged by ticket holders / $25 entry fee / three-gallon minimum), or just indulge in the other tasty smoked meat and treats off the grill. Donations for prizes, and sponsorship much appreciated. 2:30 p.m. VFW Grounds, 808-264-0168; laphamj001@hawai.rr.com

■

VINTAGE CELEBRATION - Fri - Sun. A benefit for breast cancer research.

See Friday’s listings for more. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Hula Gypsy, 505 Front St., Lahaina; 808-280-9914; hulagypsy. com

8TH ANNUAL TIMMY CABRA MEMORIAL ROPING - Roping. Free. 9 a.m. Glen Souza Memorial Arena.

MONDAY, AUG 09 HULA SHOW - Original hip-sters. Free. 10 a.m. Queen Kaahumanu Shopping Center, 275 W. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului; 808-877-3369; queenkaahumanucenter.com ONSITE CORAL REEF NATURALIST PROGRAM Learn names of fish you¹ve seen while snorkeling and how to protect Maui¹s reefs at Pacific Whale Foundation¹s free Coral Reef Information Station.

Sponsored by Hawaii Tourism Authority. 9 a.m.-12 p.m. Ulua Beach, Wailea, Between the Renaissance Wailea Resort and the Wailea Marriott Re, Wailea; 808-249-8811 ext. 1; pacificwhale.org

TUESDAY, AUG 10 MAUI NATIVE HAWAIIAN CHAMBER OF COMMERCE GENERAL MEETING - MNHCC president Mercer “Chubby” Vicens invites members and friends to attend an important meeting to discuss the 4th annual Business Fest and the Maui County Primary Election. Buffet included. $20. 5:30-8:30 p.m. Maui Beach Hotel, 170 W. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului; 808-594-1898; mauihawaiianchamber.org ONSITE CORAL REEF NATURALIST PROGRAM Learn names of fish you¹ve seen while snorkeling and how to protect Maui¹s reefs at Pacific Whale Foundation¹s free Coral Reef Information Station.

Sponsored by Hawaii Tourism Authority. 9 a.m.-12 p.m. Ulua Beach, Wailea, Between the Renaissance Wailea Resort and the Wailea Marriott Re, Wailea; 808-249-8811 ext. 1; pacificwhale.org

WEDNESDAY, AUG 11 SURFRIDER FOUNDATION GENERAL MEMBERSHIP MEETING - All are invited. Film and social hour to follow the meeting. Free. 5:30 p.m. Hawaiian Islands Humpback Whale National Marine Sanctuary Education Center, 726 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 808283-2470; surfrider.org/maui SWING LATIN AND BALLROOM DANCE CLASSES Call for more information. ritaoc@hawaii.rr.com,. $50 for 3 months. 6:30-9 p.m. Kihei Community Center, 303 E. Lipoa St., Kihei; 808-879-4364; alohaballroom.com

ART THREE-ARTIST SHOWCASE: “KOLU HIHI`O: PLACE / PERSPECTIVE / PALETTE - Daily. Viewpoints is proud to present the latest artwork by Suzy Papanikolas, Tim Garcia, & Robena. Opening reception at 5pm on July 17. This exhibit provides a unique insight as these artists approach their work from three distinctive visions. 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Viewpoints Gallery, 3620 Baldwin Ave., Makawao; 808-5725979; viewpointsgallerymaui.com PAUL MULLOWNEY EXHIBITION - Daily. For the first time since opening, the shop has invited a fine artist to work alongside their tattooists, to rise to the challenge of creating art in full view of the public-subject to the hustle, buzz, and sometimes chaotic environment of a tattoo shop. No Cover. Paia Tattoo Parlor, 120 Hana Hwy., Paia; 808-579-8515 / paiatat-

August 5, 2010 23

24 August 5, 2010

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

8/05

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

8/06

8/07

8/08

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

8/09 - 8/11

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

LOCAL MOCHA CAFE’ MAUI 81 Makawao Ave., Pukalani - 344-5884

Live Music

Live Music

MON through WED - Karaoke

JAVA JAZZ

Renee Alonso 7 pm - Close; No Cover

Guest Performer 7 pm - Close; No Cover

Farzad & Mike Madden 7 pm - Close; No Cover

Brian Cuomo 7 pm - Close; No Cover

MON - Guest Performer 7 pm - Close; No Cover; TUE - WED - Rene Alonzo 7 pm - Close; No Cover

KAHALE’S

Vince Esquire

Kenny Roberts

Eight Track Players

Kahala

MON, TUE & WED - Da-Ha-Y-Ns

Karaoke & Dancing w/ Aunty Toddy Lilikoi

Karaoke & Dancing w/ Aunty Toddy Lilikoi

3350 L. Honoapiilani Rd. 667-0787

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei 875-7711

KOBE STEAKHOUSE

136 Dickenson St., Lahaina - 667-5555

Alex Calmer 4-11pm

LAHAINA CAFE

843 Wainee St., Unit 1 & 2, Lahaina - 667-6655

Crazy Fingers 9pm; No Cover

LONGHI’S LAHAINA 888 Front St., Lahaina - 667-2288

LULU’S KIHEI

Netto & Barbara Salsa / Latin Top 40 DJ; 8pm - 2am

Tony Ray & Friends 8-11pm / Hip Hop Sesh 11pm - 2am

Gay Night 10pm - 2am

Karaoke 7:30 - 11pm; No Cover

WED - Karaoke 7:30 - 11 pm; No Cover

LULU’S LAHAINA

Classic Rock Thursday w/ Daphne Winters & Howard Ahia

TBA

X-clusive Saturday Nights w/ All Access’ DJ Big Mike

TBA

MON - Service Industry Night, No Cover; TUES - Dolla Balla Night w/ DJ Twizzy, No Cover

1945 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-9944

Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-0808

MAUI BREWING CO.

Johnny Ringo

Kahana Gateway Center - 669-3474

DJ Ray Masters’ “The Sushi Mushi Party”

MOANA CAFE

71 Baldwin Ave., Paia - 579-9999

2511 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-8644

844 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7758

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE 100 Kaukahi St. Kihei - 874-1131

MULLIGAN’S AT THE WHARF Cinema Center, Lahaina - 661-8881

tooparlor@yahoo.com; workingstudio.blogspot.com FEATURED ARTISTS - Daily. For the month of August, the Lahaina Arts Society features a joint show with works by self-taught fiber artist, Mika McCann and oil paintings by Anna Keay. Opening reception scheduled for Saturday, August 14 (6-8pm). Free.

Lahaina Arts Society Courthouse Gallery, 648 Wharf St., Lahaina; 808-244-5489; lahaina-arts.com MEET THE ARTISTS - Daily. The Four Seasons’ resident artist will be on hand to discuss his or her work. Free. 8:30 a.m.-1 p.m. Four Seasons Resort, 3900 Wailea Alanui Dr., Wailea; 808-874-8000; www. fourseasons.com/maui/ WOW - Wed, Aug 11. Wailea on Wednesdays presents live island music, gallery receptions, artist appearances and more. The Shops at Wailea, 3750 Wailea Alanui, Wailea; 808-897-6770 x2; http:// www.shopsatwailea.com

DINNER MUSIC WEST MAUI CANOES - Sun, Live Jazz 3-6 p.m.; Fri, Howard Ahia 5:30-8:30 p.m. 1450 Front St., Lahaina, 808-661-0937.

DUKES BEACH HOUSE - Every Mon, Tue & Wed, Damien & Edee 6-8:30 p.m.; Thu, Ernie & Miles 3-5 p.m.; Thu, Garrett Probst 6-8:30 p.m.; Fri, Henry Kapono 4-6 p.m.; Every Fri & Sat, Kulewa 6-8:30 p.m.; Every Sun & Sat, Mondo 3-5 p.m.; Sun, Ernie & Miles 6-8:30 p.m.; Every Mon, Tue & Wed, Brian 3-5 p.m.

130 Kai Malina Pkwy., Lahaina, 808-662-2900.

HULA GRILL - Fri, Ernetst Pua’a and Friends 6:30-9 p.m.; Sun, Kawika Lum Ho 2-4 p.m.; Tue, Jarret Roback 2-4 p.m.; Wed, Ernest Pua’a 2-4 p.m.; Wed, Ernest Pua’a Hawaiian and Friends 6:30-9 p.m.; Fri, Ron Hetten 11:30 a.m.-1 p.m.; Mon, Derick Sebastian and Josh Kahula 6:30-9 p.m.; Thu, Ernest Pua’a 2-4 p.m.; Fri, Ernest Pua’a and Kawika Lum Ho 11:30 a.m.-4 p.m.; Sun, Derrick Sebastian Trio 6:30-9 p.m.; Mon, Ernest Pua 11:30 a.m.-1 p.m.; Tue, Ernest Pua’a Hawaiian Trio 4-9 p.m.; Sat, Oren and JR 4-6 p.m.; Mon, Kawika Lum Ho 2-4 p.m. Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pkwy., Bldg P, Lahaina, 808-667-6636.

JAVA JAZZ/SOUP NUTZ - Every Mon & Fri, Guest Performer 7 p.m.; Every Tue, Wed & Thu, Renee Alonso 7

TUE - Open Mic Night WED - The Benoits 7:30-9:30pm DJ Pete 90X No Cover, 9 pm - 12 am

MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDY’S MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDY’S

WED - Open Mic Night, 10pm; No Cover

The Ringo Show 9pm

UniFires 9pm

Dolla Drinks 9pm

Pub Quiz Night with Trish the Dish and Daithi 9pm - 12am

Murray Thorne CD Release Party - See Music Scene Pg. 17

Jazz on the Blue 7 - 10pm Alan Kavnaugh10pm - Close

The Celtic Tigers 6 - 9:30pm /Live Music 10pm - Close

MON - Willie K 7-9pm / TUE - Murray Thorne/Tin Can Comedy w/ Shaggy WED - Willie K / Rick Glencross

Live Irish Aloha Friday 7 pm Johnny Ringo Nite - 10pm

Sounds of Addiction 10 pm No Cover

Ryan Palma 10 pm No Cover

MON - Bloodlines 10pm / TUES - Ryan Palma 10 pm

TUE - Dolla Drinks; WED - Dub Fire

p.m.; Sat, Farzad & Mike Madden 7 p.m. 3350 L. Honoapiilani Hwy. #203 & 204, Honokowai, 808-667-0787.

Banyan Tree Restaurant. 1 Ritz Carlton Dr., Kapalua, 808-669-6200.

6-8 p.m.; Fri, Hawaiian Music & Hula Show 5-7 p.m.

1945 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 808-879-9944.

KIMO’S RESTAURANT - Every Sun, Mon, Tue & Wed, Sam Ahia 6-8 p.m. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 808-661-4811.

SEA HOUSE RESTAURANT - Every Sun, Mon, Wed & Thu, Andrew Kaina 7-9 p.m.; Every Tue & Fri, Kincaid Kupahu 7-9 p.m. 5900 Lower Honoapiilani Hwy., Napili, 808-669-1500.

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE - Every Mon, Wed & Thu, Willie K 6:30-8:30 p.m.; Tue, Murray Thorne 6:30-8:30 p.m.; Sun, The Celtic Tigers 6:30-9:30 p.m.

100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 808-874-1131.

TIAJUANA’S CANTINA - Wed, Tableside Magic with Brenton Keith 6-9 p.m. 2291 Kaanapali Pkwy., Lahaina, (808) 667-4080.

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE - Thu, Erin Smith 4-6 p.m.; Wed, Lawaia 4-6 p.m.; Fri, Mango Pickers 4-6 p.m.; Sat, Tom Conway 4-6 p.m.; Sun, Viva La Rumba 4-6 p.m.; Mon, Kanoa 4-6 p.m.; Tue, Sebrina Barron 4-6 p.m. Kihei Kalama Village, 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 808-874-6444.

LAHAINA CAFE - Fri, Alex L Calma 7-9 p.m. 843 Wainee St., Lahaina.

LAHAINA PIZZA COMPANY - Sun, Greg Di Piazza 7:30-9:30 p.m.; Every Wed, Thu & Fri, John Kane 7:30-9:30 p.m.; Sat, Harry Troupe 7:30-9:30 p.m.; Every Mon & Tue, Martin Tevaga 7:30-9:30 p.m. 730 Front St., Lahaina, 808-661-0700.

SOUTH MAUI BEACH BUMS BAR & GRILL - Tues. & Wed, Randall Rospond & Special Guest 5-8:30 p.m.; Every Mon, Thu & Sat, Kenny Roberts 5 p.m.; Fri, Tom Cherry/Mike F 5-9 p.m.; Sun, Kaleo 5-9 p.m. 300 Maalaea Rd. #1M, Maalaea, 808-243-2286.

LEILANI’S ON THE BEACH - Sat, JD & Harry 2:305 p.m.; Sun, Kilohana 2:30-5 p.m.; Fri, The J.D on the Rocks Band 2:30-5 p.m. Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pkwy. Bldg. J, Ka’anapali, (808) 661-4495.

LONGBOARDS KA’ANAPALI - Every Tue, Wed, Thu & Fri, Solo guitarist 5:30-8:30 p.m.

100 Nohea Kai Dr., Lahaina, 808-667-1200.

MERRIMAN’S - Daily (except Mon & Tue), Ranga Pae 5:30-8:30 p.m.; Mon, The Benoits 5:30-8:30 p.m.; Tue, David Choy 5:30-8:30 p.m. 1 Bay Club Pl., Lahaina, 808-669-6400.

SUBMIT YOUR

LISTINGS Calendar Listings mauitime.com/listing

MULLIGAN’S AT THE WHARF - Fri, Irish Aloha Fridays 7-9 p.m. Wharf Cinema Center, 658 Front St., Lahaina, 808-6618881.

PINEAPPLE GRILL - Sat, Jazz on the Green 7-10 p.m.; Fri, Jawaiian Music 7-10 p.m. 200 Kapalua Dr., Kapalua, 808-669-9600.

PIONEER INN GRILL & BAR - Wed, Greg DiPiazza 6-8 p.m.; Tue, Ah Tim Elenicki 5:30-8:30 p.m. 658 Wharf St., Lahaina, 808-661-8881.

RB BLACK ANGUS STEAKHOUSE - Tue, Camp Savage 5-7 p.m.; Wed, Evan Almighty 5-7 p.m.; Fri, Evan Almighty 5-7 p.m. 4465 Honoapiilani Hwy., Lahaina, 808-669-8889.

RITZ-CARLTON KAPALUA - Every Wed & Thu,

■

CAPISCHE? - Sat, Mark Johnstone 7-10 p.m.; Fri, Mark Johnstone 7-10 p.m.

555 Kaukahi St., Kihei, 808-879-2224.

DIAMONDS ICE BAR & GRILL - Sun, Gina Martinelli Band 6-9 p.m. 1279 S. Kihei Rd. # 314, Kihei, 808-874-9299.

DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB Sun, Billy & The Bad Dogs 4-7 p.m. 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 808-875-9669.

FIVE PALMS RESTAURANT - Sun, Brian Cuomo 7 p.m. 2960 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 808-879-2607.

GIAN DON’S - Fri, Joe Conti & Sayrah Garrison 7-9 p.m.; Thu, Jeff New Island Style Music 5-8 p.m. 1445 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 808-874-4041.

HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH - Wed, Jordan Cudworth 4-8 p.m.; Thu, Junior Lacuesta 4-8 p.m.; Sat, Ryan Robinson and Wolf 4-7 p.m.; Sun, Dan & Ann 5-8 p.m.; Mon, TBD 4-8 p.m.; Every Tue & Fri, Rick Glencross 4-8 p.m. 1913 S. Kihei Rd. #E, Kihei, 808-891-8010.

LONGHI’S WAILEA - Sat, Longhi’s. The Shops at Wailea, 3750 Wailea Ala Nui , Wailea, 808-891-8883.

LULU’S KIHEI - Sat, Hawaiian Music & Hula Show

STELLA BLUES CAFE - Wed, Cyrus Clarke 4-6 p.m.; Thu, Ah Tim 4-6 p.m.; Fri, Ahumanu 4-6 p.m.; Sun, Phil & Angela Benoit 5-8 p.m.; Mon, Tom Cherry and Mike Finkiewicz 4-6 p.m.; Tue, Tom Conway 4-6 p.m.

1279 South Kihei Rd., # 201, Kihei, 808-874-3779.

TAQUERIA CRUZ - Every Tue & Sat, Live Music Reggae, Jazz, Blues 5:30-8:30 p.m. 2395 S. Kihei Rd. #112, Kihei, 808-875-2910.

TOMMY BAHAMA’S TROPICAL CAFE - Every Sun & Sat, Howard Ahia 5:30-9:30 p.m.; Every Thu & Fri, Margie Heart 5:30-9:30 p.m.; Mon, Greg Di Piazza 5:30-9:30 p.m.; Every Sun & Wed, Merv Oana 5:30-9:30 p.m. 3750 Wailea Alanui Dr., Kihei, 808-875-9983.

TRADEWINDS POOLSIDE CAFE - Wed, Mondo Kane 6-9 p.m.; Thu, Island favorites with Kawika Lum Ho 6-9 p.m.; Fri, Girls Night Out with Gina Martinelli 6-9 p.m.; Sat, Clasic Rock with Dominic 6-9 p.m.; Sun, Crunch Pups 6-9 p.m.; Mon, Bobby Ingraham 6-9 p.m.; Tue, Mike and Mark 6-9 p.m. 2259 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 808-891-8860.

CENTRAL MAUI CAFE O’LEI AT THE DUNES AT MAUI LANI - Every Fri & Sat, Phil and Angela Benoit 5:30-8 p.m.; Thu, Reiko Fukina 5:30-8 p.m. 1333 Maui Lani Pkwy., Kahului, 808-877-0073.

CARY & EDDIE’S HIDEAWAY RESTAURANT - Every Thu, Fri & Sat, Friends of Bryan 5:30 p.m.; Every Thu, Fri & Sat, Menehune Music and Bryan and Friends 8-11:30 p.m.; Sun, Fausto’s Guitar 9 a.m.-1 p.m.; Every Tue & Sat, Francois’ Piano 5 p.m. 500 N. Puunene Ave., Kahului, 808-873-6555.

August 5, 2010 25

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OCEANS BAR & GRILL

Billy & The Bad Dogs 9pm; No Cover

Video DJ w/ Big Mike 10pm; No Cover

Duck Fat Birthday Bash w/ Maoli, 10pm; No Cover

PINEAPPLE GRILLE

Jawaiian Music w/ DJ Bruddah Damien

Ocean Vodka Beach Party 7-10 pm

Smooth Jazz Sounds w/ Brian Cuomo & Friends, 7pm -10m

1819 S. Kihei Rd. - 891-2414

200 Kapalua Drv. Lahaina - 669-9600

RB BLACK ANGUS STEAKHOUSE

Evan Almighty

4465 Honoapiilani Hwy, Lahaina - 669-8889

TUE - Camp Savage / WED - Evan Almighty

SANSEI - KAPALUA

Free Karaoke No Cover, 10pm - 1am

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Open Mic Night 10 pm

SANSEI - KIHEI

Free Karaoke No Cover, 10pm-1am

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Erin Smith / DJ Slackin, 10pm; No Cover

Mango Pickers / DJ Sonny, 10pm; No Cover

Tom Conway / DJ LX, 10pm; No Cover

No Remorse 9pm - 12am; No Cover

Vince Esquire 9pm - 12am; No Cover

Ahumanu

Moth w/ Order of the White Rose and Owaila, 10pm; $7

Maui Underground 9pm - 1 am; $3

Karaoke w/ Pearl Rose 9pm-12am; No Cover

Ladies Night w/ DJ Unique 10pm; No Cover

Marty Dread / Nuff Said

115 Bay Dr., Lahaina - 669-6286

1881 S. Kihei Rd., Ste. KT116 -879-0004

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-6444

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR 2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-0602

STELLA BLUE’S

1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-3779

Ah Tim

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR 1127 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-1380

THREE’S BAR & GRILL 1945 S Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-3133

TIA JUANA’S

2911 Ka’anapali Pkwy., Ka’anapali - 667-4080

TIFFANY’S

1424 L. Main St., Wailuku - 249-0052

TIMBA

505 Front St, Ste. 212, Lahaina - 661-9873

WATERCRESS

Waiehu Beach Center, Wailuku-243-9350

WOW-WEE MAUI’S

333 Dairy Rd. #101, Kahului - 871-1414

TUE - Taco Tuesday; WED - Video DJ with Money Mike, 10pm; No Cover

Arise 10 pm ; No Cover

Pin-Up Girls Party; 8pm; Proceeds Benefit WHW

MON - DJ Blast / TUE - Tequila Tuesday w/ DJ LX; WED- Ladies Night with the ADD Twins

Jazz w/ Phil & Angie Benoits

MON - Tom Cherry & Mike Finkiewicz / TUES Tom Conway; WED - Brudda D & Friends

MON - Happy Hour / TUES - 1/2 Off Sushi & House Music 10 pm / WED - Industry Night

Mike Caroll 6-9pm

MON - Johnny Ringo / TUE - Randy / WED - Daniel (All Sets 10pm - 12am)

Karaoke

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MON through WED- Karaoke

Industry Night 9pm - 2am; No Cover

Undone Party w/ Q Ross 9pm - 2am; $10

Spun Out w/ N8 Castro 9pm - 2am; $10

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MON - WED - Closed

Jesse Tan Olie, Piilali Arias, Kama Koa, Ah Sing

Cane Fire 10pm; No Cover

Ladies Night w/ Go Go Dancers & DJ Money Mike

Karaoke

MON - Karaoke / TUES - All Day Happy Hour & Karaoke / WED - Karaoke

Karaoke No Cover; 8pm

MON through WED - Dat Guyz; No Cover

KAHULUI ALE HOUSE - Tue, Ladies Night w/ Bad Kitty 8-11 p.m.; Thu, The Crunch Pups 7-10 p.m. 355 E. Kamehameha Ave., Kahului, 808-877-9001.

KANAEHELE ROOM - Daily (except Sun & Mon), “Kupanaha: Maui Magic for All Ages” Kanehele Room 4:30-7:30 p.m.

Warren & Annabelle’s - 900 Front St., (808) 667-6244.

MAIN STREET BISTRO - Every Thu & Fri, Rythm & Blues with Freedom 5 p.m.-7:30 a.m. 2051 Main St., Wailuku, 808-244-6816.

TIKI BAR & GRILL - Daily, Hula Show 6:30-7 p.m.; Every Tue & Wed, Leo Kane 6-9 p.m.; Thu, Daniel Palakiko 6-9 p.m.; Every Sun & Mon, Kealaoka’ (Jason Fundang) 6-9 p.m.; Daily, Music by Lanui 6-9 p.m.

Westin Maui Resort & Spa - 2365 Kaanapali Pkwy., 808-667-2525.

UPCOUNTRY MAUI CAFE DES AMIS - Wed, Cafe Des Amis; Wed, Stone Violets 6:30-9 p.m. 42 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 808-579-6323.

GREEN BANANA CAFE - Every Tue, Thu & Sat, Polynesian Dance Coffee Luau 6 p.m. 137 Hana Hwy., Paia, 808-579-9130.

HANA HOU CAFE - Mon-Fri, Hana Hou Cafe 6-9 p.m. 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku, 808-575-2661.

MAX WORLD BISTRO - Fri, Goody and the Kit 6-9:30 p.m.; Every Tue & Wed, Brooks Maguire 6:309 p.m. Ha’iku Town Center, 810 Kokomo Rd., Ha’iku, 808-575-2629.

MOANA BAKERY & CAFE - Sun, Randall 6:309:30 p.m.; Sun, Randall Rospond 6:30-9:30 p.m.; Tue, Open-Mic 7-11 p.m. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 808-579-9999.

SPICE AND RICE - Thu, The “Trouble Makers” 7-10 p.m. 824 Kokomo Rd., Haiku, 575-2770.

RESORT SHOWS WEST MAUI Hyatt Regency Maui Resort & Spa - 200 Nohea Kai Dr., 808-661-1234.

TROPICA - Sun, Keali’i Lum 6-9 p.m.; Every Wed, Thu & Fri, Benny Uyetake 6-9 p.m.; Every Mon & Sat, Mitch Kepa 6-9 p.m.; Tue, Steve Sargenti 6-9 p.m.

Marriot Maui Ocean Club - 100 Nohea Kai Dr., 808-667-1200.

LONGBOARDS KA’ANAPALI - Wed, Desmond Yap 5:30-9:30 p.m.; Sun, Miles Ahead Duo 8-11 a.m.; Daily, Solo guitarists and sunset hula dancers 5:30-8:30 p.m.

Napili Kai Beach Resort 5900 L. Honoapiilani Rd., 808-669-6271.

NAPILI KAI BEACH RESORT - Thu, Kincaid Basques and Albert Kaiana 6:30-9 p.m.; Sun, Andrew Kaina 7-9 p.m.; Sat, Coelho Morrison 7-9 p.m.

SOUTH MAUI Fairmont Kea Lani - 4100 Wailea Alanui Dr., 808-840-8402.

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Ritz-Carlton Kapalua - One Ritz-Carlton Dr., 808-669-6200.

ALALOA LOUNGE - Every Fri & Sat, Live entertainment 8-12 p.m.

RITZ-CARLTON KAPALUA - Daily, The Lounge.

Royal Lahaina Resort - 2780 Kekaa Dr., 808-661-3611.

Kaanapali Beach Club - 104 Kaanapali Shores, 808-661-2000.

Sheraton Maui - 2605 Kaanapali Pkwy., 808-661-0031.

Kaanapali Beach Hotel - 2525 Kaanapali Pkwy., (808) 661-0011.

ONO BAR & GRILL - Sun, Raz Shaggai 6-9 p.m.; Fri, Brian Haia 6-9 p.m.; Sat, Keali’i Lum 6-9 p.m.; Wed, Scott Baird Duo with James DeBose 6-9 p.m.

TIKI TERRACE RESTAURANT - Sun, Ka’anapali Champagne Brunch 9 a.m.-1 p.m.

UMALU - Daily (except Wed), Live Music 7-9 p.m.; Thu, Off Tomorrow 6-9 p.m.; Daily, Torch Lighting Ceremony 5:30-6 p.m.; Daily (except Wed), Live Music 4-6 p.m.

OHANA BAR & GRILL - Every Wed & Thu, Live Music 5:30-9:30 p.m.; Every Sun, Thu & Sat, Torch Lighting Ceremony 5:30-9:30 p.m.

WARREN & ANNABELLE’S - Mon-Sat, Warren & Annabelle’s Magic Show 5 p.m.

ROYAL OCEAN TERRACE - Every Thu, Fri & Sat, Live Hawaiian Music 6-8 p.m.; Every Thu, Fri & Sat, Live Hawaiian Music 6-8 p.m.

LAGOON BAR - Daily, Torch Lighting Ceremony 6-8 p.m.; Daily, Cliff Diving Ceremony 6-8 p.m.; Daily, Live Music 6-9 p.m.

Sugar Cane Train - 975 Limahana Pl., 808-661-0088.

SUGAR CANE TRAIN - Thu, Sugar Cane Train Dinner 5 p.m.; Daily, Ride the Sugar Cane Train 10 a.m.-4 p.m.

■

FAIRMONT KEA LANI - Daily, Live Music 5:30-9:30 p.m.

POLO BEACH GRILLE & BAR - Daily, Live Music 4-5:30 p.m.

Four Seasons Resort 3900 Wailea Alanui Dr., 808-874-8000.

FOUR SEASONS RESORT - Daily, Tourch Lighting Ceremony 5:30 p.m.

LOBBY LOUNGE - Daily, Torch Lighting Ceremony 5:30-6:30 p.m.; Tue, Jazz Music 8-10:30 p.m.; Every Mon, Wed, Thu & Sat, Contemporary Music 8:30-10:30 p.m.; Fri, Jazz Music 8-11:30 p.m.; Sun, Hawaiian Music 8:3010:30 p.m.; Daily, Hula Dancers 5:30-6:30 p.m.

Grand Wailea Resort & Spa - 3850 Wailea Alanui Dr., 808-875-1234.

BOTERO BAR & LOUNGE - Wed, Live Hawaiian Music 5:30-9:30 p.m.

GRAND DINING ROOM - Sun, Live Hawaiian Music and Hula Performances 10:30 a.m.-1 p.m.

Makena Beach & Golf Resort - 5400 Makena Alanui, 808-875-5888.

MAKENA BEACH & GOLF RESORT - Sun, Live Music 9 a.m.-1 p.m.

The Shops at Wailea - 3750 Wailea Alanui, 808891-6770.

THE SHOPS AT WAILEA - Wed, Marti Kluth 6:30-8 p.m.; Wed, Jamie Lawerence and friends 6:30-8:30 p.m.

Wailea Beach Marriot Resort & Spa - 3700 Wailea Alanui Dr., 808-879-1922.

KUMU BAR & GRILL - Daily, Hula Dancing 6:30-9 p.m.

MELE MELE LOUNGE - Daily, Live Music 9-11 p.m.

EAST MAUI Hotel Hana-Maui - 5031 Hana Hwy., 808-248-8211.

HOTEL HANA-MAUI - Fri, Hula dancing 7-8 p.m.

PANIOLO LOUNGE - Every Sun, Wed, Thu & Sat, Live music 6:30-9:30 p.m.; Fri, Live music 6-9 p.m.

LIST YOUR EVENT!

Post your free online listing (up to 15 months early), and our editors will consider your submission for the printed calendar as well. Print listings are also free, but subject to space limitations. Online, you can include a full description of your event, a photo and a link to your Web site. Go to mauitime.com/listing and start posting events. Deadline for print listings is 10 days prior to the issue in which you wish the listing to appear.

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Looking for something to do? Use MauiTime’s free calendar to browse hundreds of events online. Art galleries, family events, education classes, film and literary events, church groups, music, sports, volunteer opportunities—all this and more on our free events calendar at mauitime.com/calendar.

Start planning your week!

August 5, 2010 27

Kula Kid

The Right Words “Regular like hygiene/ Portrait of the elite/ Tougher to beat than cancer / Why the fuck do we do it? / Here’s the answer / We do it ‘cause we need it / We do it ‘cause we love it / We do it ‘cause it’s our life / Put nothing above it.”

- Terms One, “The Answer”

F ISSUE, F I N S D N CRATCH A.” -Joe Sanvidotto S A S A W “IF THIS BROKE DA NOSE d email it to us with yodu, r e an the islan I WOODA meone reading MauiTim unter” on ! Awards. auiTime h

o d the Buste and coolest “M e! Catch s Thanks, Jo only will you be the into our contest for s ie d o o g f o t d s o caption. N automatically entere ore will win all sort someone! be ! us and m and bust but you’ll itime.com ost Hilario g for, get out there M , e v ti ted@mau a s u in b it a to w s Most Cre n u o o what are y r photos with capti prizes. So il you

» Ema

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28 August 5, 2010

I

f dry-heaves are happiness (stay with me), having a regular writing gig is kind of like a never-ending hangover.

I wouldn’t trade the experience for the world (and have at times traded the world for the experience), but sometimes I wonder if I’m committing slow suicide whilst pained and bent over porcelain keys.

Kula Kid is fledgling yet—this is only the ninth installment—but in that time, I’ve yet to write an “out on the town” piece about my (presumed) latenight exploits (a la my Holoholo Girl predecessor). Every time I sit down to do it, I can’t find the words.

What to say? Do I divulge that I’m a terrible dancer to the masses who may yet be unscarred? Do I ramble instead about being a champion pupu consumer or the fact that I’ve christened many a Maui pass-out spot with naught but draught puke? Or the fact that when I do go out, I often find myself the next morning with more than my fair share of wrecked heels (whose shoes are these, anyway?), mud, cuts, burns and bruises? It’s hardly glamorous, but I suppose proof of a good time.

Also, I haven’t had the chance to be out and about with the regularity I’d like or that the job demands. I’ll blame it on the cancer.

I

n the short span between this writing and its printing, I will have had my fourth and final bone marrow biopsy. The results should give me the official leukemia-free stamp of approval, and I’d like to think that having reached that milestone, my psyche’s queue will be cleared.

I had to count on my fingers, but it’s been nine months since my diagnosis.

That’s enough time to have baked a bun in the oven (though those lady parts may or may not have been irreparably damaged by the chemo), and to me that’s just way too long.

When I was first told that best-case scenario my spleen would be removed, and worst-case scenario I had a rare form of blood cancer, I was somehow seriously under the impression the

whole shebang would take but a couple of weeks. Ah, naïveté.

Yet in addition to the clean bill of health, renewed vigor for latenight ventures and thus further column fodder, I’m really looking forward to the biopsy itself. More than a leuk landmark, for me it’s just plain ol’ interesting.

Doctor Coty, my hematologist, thinks I’m certifiably crazy in that I love to watch a procedure he says most find “traumatic.” To me, it’s a rare, unmissable opportunity to watch someone shove—with brute force—a huge metal spike into my iliac crest (top, rear hipbone), and proceed to suck a maggot-sized piece of marrow out of it. Who wouldn’t want to watch? The contrast between how much takes place and how relatively little you feel is astounding; truly the only annoying bit is having to crane my arm while clutching a handheld mirror so I can watch Doc work.

When the pain gets intense, I simply pretend I’m on a feudal Japanese battlefield and some kyudo archery master has got the better of my backside at long range.

When all the blood and guts are cleaned up (OK, no guts), and after having seen a bit more of my bum than anyone should be subjected to, Doc pours me a Dixie cup of apple juice and holds my hand as he walks me back to the waiting room—which is nice.

After that, the plan is to put on my tough face, wave a jovial goodbye to Doc and the nurses and return to the real challenge at hand: hitting the scene and finding the right words. ■

Anu Yagi welcomes comments, and will be hanging out at mauifeed.com/ kulakid. You can also follow her on Twitter at @anuheayagi.

To share or save this article, type: mt.hy. pr/1407k

by Caeriel Crestin

Horoscopes

sign.language.astrology@gmail.com LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22) Sometimes getting through it is the best you can hope for. Sure, we all want to shine in everything that happens to us, but expecting that of yourself right now is probably too demanding. Go easier on yourself, especially when things are this much of a struggle. You’ll be able to shine again, but perhaps not just this second. Let your radiance be dimmer than usual as you push to get to the end of the tunnel, and simply trust that you won’t forget how to sparkle, even if you can’t quite manage it at the moment.

QUIZunderstood answers 1. B.; University of Colorado and Saddleback College

SIGN

AGE LANGU

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22)

2. Hawai‘iloa; Ki, Kanaloa and La‘akapu 3. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom; chymopapain

Sometimes practical considerations must fly out the window to accommodate impractical ones that are nevertheless important to someone (if not you). This contradicts your nature, as you’d prefer everything to run sensibly and smoothly—but that’s not how human emotions always work. The unusual and unexpected must be taken into account. Luckily, your streamlining skills aren’t completely useless right now; you can still turn them to whatever your new goals turn out to be, no matter how outlandish they are. Getting on board here will mean a lot to whoever you’re accommodating—so just go for it.

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22) Avoiding a painful subject won’t erase it. In fact, it’s likely to eventually eclipse so much of your life that you’ll have trouble really engaging with anything else that’s going on. It’s time to share what’s up. So what if your relationship hasn’t yet had to bear the weight of something so heavy? Finding out whether it can is a milestone you’re ready for. You never know—it might be strengthened by sharing your burdens. I wouldn’t unload those all at once though; offer a little at a time and wait for a green light before you proceed.

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21) I’m glad you’ve left some darker chapters of your past behind and moved on, practically, emotionally, and spiritually. But never forget that they’re part of you—perhaps an integral factor in how you’ve become who you are. Therefore you should share them with anyone you hope to truly be close to, at some point before the revelation would feel like a betrayal (but after it would simply scare them off). Of course finding that “perfect” time is difficult, especially because there’s really no such thing as a perfect time. However, the closest you’re going to get to a right moment to share this stuff is very likely to happen this week.

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21) Newly converted people are frequently bores. Whether their newfound passion is vegetarianism, fervent Christianity, or radical environmentalism, they can be insufferable to be around. Don’t get too worked up about it, though. People with this level of intensity rarely sustain it. They either burn out and move on, or simply mellow out and realize that there are many viable and wonderful paths through life and that even though theirs is clearly the best one, they learn to live and let live. Bite your tongue, give them (and yourself) some space, and check in periodically to see if they’ve chilled out yet.

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19) Too many sprawling plotlines can ruin a TV show or novel; it’s impossible to get invested in characters you never get to see for very long. I prefer a tale with only a few, well-realized storylines going on at any one time. Your life has begun to resemble an out-of-control soap opera. If you’re only allowing people cameo appearances in your life, you’re never going to be able to let yourself feel invested in them (or vice versa). It’s time to rein things in a bit and instead of having a hundred shallow plotlines going at once, try to cut back to three that really mean something (or could, if you gave them the space to).

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18) Don’t let your personal judgments and opinions get in the way of doing a good job. You agreed to this situation. Naturally, it’s also your choice to extract yourself from it, if it’s really contrary to who you are and what you’re about. However, if you do that, ask yourself how you got into this position, so that you can keep yourself from going there again. While it’s your right to remove yourself from any circumstances that don’t suit you, you must acknowledge that it puts others in an uncomfortable position. Do what you’ve got to do, of course—but don’t forget to learn from your mistakes, or it’ll be all too easy to make them again.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20) Women have more rights and power today than they’ve had through most (but not all) of human history. However, there’s still a long way to go. Unfortunately, now that most of the “big” steps have already been taken, all the little steps must happen on an incremental, case-by-case basis. This, of course, is how most change happens—and how the transformations you wish upon your own life must occur. You’ve taken the only big steps you can take, for now. All that’s left is a million little movements in the direction you want to go and you need to pursue these simply and patiently—one step at a time.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19) Some people embrace change with excitement, while sometimes it seems that most others are dismayed, embittered, or frightened by it. If you are the catalyst for that change, consider it also your calling to help people to become comfortable with it. Yeah, it’d be easier if they’d just get over it and realize just how great it will be, and become as thrilled as you are. But they can’t, or won’t, so consider it your duty, like it or not, to help them get to the brilliant, hopeful place that—so far—only you can see.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20) One Taurus I know can literally spend hours a day online looking at blogs composed entirely of images (mostly not porn!). “I’m a visual creature,” he explains. He likes seeing new things. Experiencing new things, on the other hand, is an entirely different matter. Many of you Bulls cling stubbornly to the cherished familiar, and have a hard time truly enjoying the new when it’s in your face. Of course you’re rational enough to know that the only thing you can truly count on in life is the certainty of change. So when it comes—as it’s like to, this week, in a big way—at least try to throw yourself into it.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20) Part of me fantasizes about moving to a very rural New Zealand homestead and leading a life of hermit-like solitude, growing my own food and enjoying ample room to breathe. And yet most of the my adult life I’ve lived in dense cities surrounded by people. We all have these seemingly contradictory impulses, but especially you Twins. Sometimes all you can do is time-share your body between all the different forces at work inside you. For instance, I haven’t entirely ruled out that New Zealand farm in the next decade or two. This week, it might be a good time to let some other internal impulse—one that hasn’t gotten a lot of play—get a turn.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22) While leaving your house naked might get you into legal trouble, as a spiritual exercise it would be very productive and rewarding. Going out into the world without armor doesn’t come naturally to you (your astrological symbol, after all, is the crab); nevertheless it’s important that you allow yourself to take it off much more frequently than you have the last few years. Try to think of ways to strip down the barriers and venture out into the world vulnerable, yet strong, able to take whatever comes your way without hiding behind a shell. This week should provide you with ample opportunity to practice exactly that.

August 5, 2010 29

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NOTICES ALOHA VALUED READERS We would like to let our readers know that we try to screen most of our ads. We read back the ad copy to ensure that it is the correct information that advertisers want. If you see the acronym (AAN CAN) that ad is a national ad and was not submitted directly to us. If you have a question directly concerning AAN CAN, please check out aancan.org GAIN NATIONAL EXPOSURE Reach over 5 million young, educated readers for only $995 by advertising in 110 weekly newspapers like this one. Call Jason at 202-289-8484. This is not a job offer. (AAN CAN) DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH IS OFFERING FREE HIV TESTING & COUNSELING (STD/HEP C as well). Mon: Kihei Community Centerâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; 11-2 pm Tues: Wailuku Health Centerâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; all day Wed: *Paia Community Centerâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; 12-3 pm ( 1st, 3rd, (5th)

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through the ALOHA SHARES NETWORK to local non-proďŹ ts.

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