08.31 The World of Maui's Astronomers, January 27, 2005, Volume 8, Issue 31, MauiTime

HOME OF HOLOHOLO GIRL, COCONUT WIRELESS, EMPLOYEE OF THE WEEK, FOOD COPS, EH BRAH!, LC WATCH & THEATRICALIZED NARCISSISM

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A MAN AND HIS BIRD 5

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CONTENTS

office (808) 661–3786 • fax (808) 661–0446

VOLUME 8 • ISSUE 31

www.mauitime.com

COVER STORY 10

ONO KINE GRINDS 12

•Exploring Science City The strange world of Maui’s astronomers – by Barukh Shalev

5

13 16

•New Column!

•Eh Brah!

Calendar Goddess: Kim Welch kim@mauitime.com

•Eating and Talking

Contributing Writers: Eric Campbell, Caeriel Crestin, Sarah Elwell, Courtney Mather, Ted Rall, Barukh Shalev, Chuck Shepherd, Cole Smithey, George Thrustgood

•Dining Listings Hours, locations and price ranges of Maui’s eateries

Illustration: Guy Junker, Glenn Watson

•Employee of the Week

Photography: Sean M. Hower, Kirsten Guenther Interns: Kellie Holliday, Morgan Lorenzana, Gabrielle Poccia

DA KINE CALENDAR

•LC Watch •A Man and His Bird Keith and Rascale are a Lahaina institution – by Barukh Shalev

6

•Coconut Wireless •Overheard...

7

•News of the Weird •Ted Rall Cartoon

8

•Hair on Maui •Op Ed: Legal, Safe and Common We could restore sanity to immigration if we wanted to – by Ted Rall

Art Director: Rudi King rudi@mauitime.com

19 •This Week’s Picks 22 •Film: Beyond Spacey Sings Darin the Sea ( ) – by Cole Smithey 23 •Movies & Times 24 •Pure Volume 25 •A&E: Music from the Master DJ Rob Swift’sTop 10 Must-Have Albums

Production Assistant: Wendy Higa Advertising Executive: Brad Chambers brad@mauitime.com General Manager: Jennifer Russo jen@mauitime.com Office Assistant: Becky Spector Web Design: Liko Resources webmaster@likoresources.com Publisher: Tommy Russo tommy@mauitime.com

– by Samantha Campos

26 •The Grid & Calendar Listings

MauiTime Weekly is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright © 2004 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited. Maui Time Weekly may be distributed only by MauiTime Weekly’s authorized independent contractor. MauiTime Weekly is valued at $.50 per copy and permits one complimentary copy per person. No person may, without written permission of MauiTime Weekly, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime Weekly are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime Weekly.

CLASSIFIED

ONO KINE GRINDS 9

Associate Editor: Samantha Campos sam@mauitime.com

People-watching at the Nagasako Okazuya – by Eric Campbell

MAUI COUNTY 4

Editor: Anthony Pignataro anthony@mauitime.com

•New Year Plunge Maui hosts the only sane Polar Bear swim in the world – by Courtney Mather

31 •Personals 32 •Classified Listings 33 •Sign Language 34 •HoloHolo Girl 35 •Mind, Body & Spirit

Deadlines: Display Advertising: Friday Noon Classified: Monday 4pm Calendar: Monday Noon

Science City p.10

DJ Rob Swift p.25

Circulation: 11,000 copies of the MauiTime Weekly

COVER DESIGN: RUDI KING

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PAI A Fi s h M ar k et Restaurant

Tides & times Tide-times set for Honolulu - adjust as follows: Kahului: 1hr 41min Hana: 1hr 23 min Makena: 0hr 32min Kihei/Ma`alaea: 0hr 22 min Lahaina: 0hr 40 min

27 Sun R 7:10A Thur Sun S 6:19P

H 5:25A +2.1 H 6:25P +0.9 L 12:29P +0.1 L 11:33P +0.2

28

Sun R 7:10A Fri Sun S 6:19P

H 5:53A +2.0 H 6:25P +0.9 L 12:55P +0.1 L 11:33P +0.2

29 Sun R 7:09A Sat Sun S 6:20P

H 6:20A +1.8 L 1:21P +0.0

30 Sun R 7:09A Sun Sun S 6:21P

L 12:25A +0.4 L 1:49P +0.0 H 6:48A +1.6 H 8:26P +1.2

H 7:21P +1.0

31 Sun R 7:09A Mon Sun S 6:21P

L 1:38A +0.7 H 7:17A +1.3

L 2:19P +0.0 H 9:38P +1.4

1 Sun R 7:09A Tue Sun S 6:22P

L 3:31A +0.8 H 7:50A +1.0

L 2:57P +0.0 H 10:51P +1.6

2 Sun R 7:08A Wed Sun S 6:22P

L 6:12A +0.6 H 8:39A +0.7

L 3:44P -0.1 H 11:56P +1.8

NEWCOLUMN!

Ask a Flakey Book Press Release Dear Flakey Book Press Release, My girlfriend and I don’t get into arguments that often, but last night we did. We were watching The Antiques Road Show like we always do, but right at the moment when the guy was supposed to tell the old lady that she’s been carefully preserving a piece of trash for the last four decades, she suddenly said that since we’ve been together for 11 years, we ought to get married.

Where do women get ideas like that?

-Shocked and appalled

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Dear Shocked, The discipline of martial arts requires strength of mind, body and spirit. The student obeys the master and the master imparts wisdom and physical prowess… and so the ancient arts of fighting are learned. But what happens when the discipline of martial arts evolves into blind obedience and dangerous allegiance? That’s what William Self, a former martial arts studio owner and award-winning black-belt, explores in his new novel Blood & Tequila.

Self, who owned and operated a successful martial arts studio on the island of Kauai for twelve years, takes a unique look at the dark side of martial arts with a haunting and disturbing portrayal of an unforgiving fanatical martial arts master, Omega, who leads a group of five students on an intense, near cult-like journey.

Dear Flakey Book Press Release, What’s the capital of Saskatchewan? My brother says it’s Saskatoon, I say it’s Moose Jaw and our dad says we’re both stupid fools because it’s Regina. But

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please hurry—I’ve got a lot of money riding on this one.

-Canadaphile Dear Canadaphile, With shades of the moral confusion in Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness, Blood & Tequila is a masterful work which probes life’s ambiguities and the strength of human bonds unlike virtually any other work. The author immediately draws the reader into the secretive, near-hypnotic world of extreme martial arts on the idyllic island of Kauai, which is being pummeled by Hurricane Iniki. As the island struggles against Iniki, so the students and master struggle to make choices reflective of their own internal moral struggles.

Omega, the novel’s fanatical protagonist, eerily reminds the reader of what can wrong when one is so submerged in singular philosophies and purposes and loses touch with reality.

Self writes: “Omega was a man torn away from reality a piece at a time, a walking contradiction revealed by an odd nature. Strangely, the more he was disapproved, the more he was accepted.”

Dear Flakey Book Press Release, Are you actually alive?

-Suspicious Dear Suspicious, Based upon the author’s own extensive experiences in the martial arts, Blood & Tequila is a fast-paced tale rife with lessons and examinations of the inherent conflicts between submission and personal freedom. When the lines between friendship, loyalty and obedience are blurred, a life and death struggle ensues, and the bonds of love and friendship are tested. MTW

EH BRAH! Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less, changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent to “Eh Brah!” c/o Maui Time Weekly, 658 Front Street, Ste. 126A–7278, Lahaina, HI 96761 or send an e-mail to

ehbrah@mauitime.com You interviewed a local friend of mine for a possible job opening. Or, at least, you pretended to interview her. Everything apparently was going fine, until she asked you if she’d get the job. You said no because she was, as you put it, “too local.” Now I know this girl very well—she’s the best employee I have. Needless to say, she was devastated and saddened by this incredibly unprofessional and racist remark. When I asked if she would sue you, she said that she wouldn’t respond with the same lack of aloha. It’s people like you who destroy the spirit of aloha in the name of corporate image.

MAUICOUNTY

BY BARUKH SHALEV

A Man and His Bird

‘Stringent Controls’

PHOTO: BARUKH SHALEV

Keith and Rascale are a Lahaina institution Keith and Rascale first met about 12 years ago. Keith was a bartender at the Blue Lagoon and Rascale, a Harlequin Macquaw, was languishing in a pet shop on the stuffy third floor of the Lahaina Wharf Center.

“I bought ‘im right then and there and he’s been with me ever since,” Keith shouts at me. He shouts everything he says.

Keith is a big guy with a big head and long hair. Sitting in front of me at the counter of the Salvation Army, he cuts a dashing figure in blue surf shorts and a blue Salvation Army shirt with the sleeves cut,

LC Watch

muscle shirt style. For the past 35 years, he’s been getting up at 7 a.m. “sharp!” to start riding his bike up and down Front Street in Lahaina.

Up and down, up and down, back and forth, “about a dozen times a day.”

Everyone has seen Keith and Rascale. They are a Front Street institution. The first time I saw the duo, Keith was picking mangoes from someone’s yard and telling Rascale to “knock it off.” Rascale likes mangoes. He also likes pasta, ice cream, pizza and cake.

“He likes what we like,” says Keith. “I try to keep him on nuts and fruits but he eats anything he can get his hands on. He eats my food, then he eats his food.”

The only thing Rascale doesn’t like is parrot food. “They have those pellets that parrots are supposed to like but he won’t touch the stuff.”

When he isn’t riding his bike back and forth through Lahaina, Keith tends the counter at the Salvation Army. But while Keith is at work, Rascale stays at home.

“He is too grouchy to be here,” says Keith as he rings up a giant inflatable dolphin, then barks “three bucks” at the customer.

After he gets off work, Rascale “demands to go for a ride,” so off they go. Because the sun sets earlier now, they only go to Mala Wharf and hang out. But in the summer, Keith and Rascale go to Wahikuli Beach Park.

“Yeah, you know, down by the Post Office,” says Keith. “Rascale likes it there.” They go and watch the sunset together.

After being released from the Army in 1966, Keith says he decided to stay on the island.

“It was too cold to go back to Huron [in South Dakota], so I figured what the hell, I’ll stay,” he says. “Good run but I spent more than half my time here in bars. Almost killed me. I don’t drink anymore, now I just tend the counter at the Salvation and ride with my bird.”

Keith has to ride—he says he can’t walk because of his “two arthritic knees and cellulitus.

“See when you got two bum knees you don’t have the luxury of limping,” he says. “You have to limp against your limp. Add on the cellulitus and there you go. If I don’t ride, I don’t go.”

Keith will die before Rascale does.

Harlequin Macaws can live as long as 60 years in the wild and twice that in captivity. Today Rascale is 12, but Keith is pushing 60.

You do the math.

“Yep, old Rascale will outive me,” says Keith. “He is too ornery not to.”

MTW

Wal-Mart is the biggest corporation in the world. Every week, 138 million people shop in its stores. The company’s annual revenues are equal to two percent of the U.S. gross domestic product.

It employs 1.5 million people in nine nations, yet pays nearly all of them pathetic wages.

And now, thanks to the Liquor Commission, Wal-Mart can sell booze in its Kahului outlet.

The Commission approved the retail behemoth’s bid on Jan. 12, during its regular monthly hearing. It happened fairly early, after the general licensing matters that appear interminable on the agenda but actually take only a minute or two to dispense with but before the main block of public hearings. The news was so big that The Maui News wrote about it two days later—and they rarely even acknowledge that the LC exists.

The Liquor Commission says it takes very seriously its responsibilities to make sure liquor licensees are sober and honest. Near the beginning of the Maui County Department of Liquor Control 2004 Annual Report is a brief discussion of the “system of strict licensing procedures and stringent controls over those licensed to conduct business in the liquor industry” that governs the LC. The phrasing may be terribly passive, but the thoughts behind it are strong.

“The public can be assured of the highest standards of integrity and responsibility,” states the Report. “[T]he operations of the liquor industry [will be] conducive to the health, safety, and welfare of the community they serve.”

Remember, this is the same commission that once voted to put rather harsh restrictions on the times the independently owned and operated restaurant Yorman’s by the Sea in Kihei could host live jazz bands. But when it comes granting a liquor license to Wal-Mart—a massive corporation that maximizes its profits by barely paying its working class employees—everything goes.

I mean, there are stringent controls, and then there are “stringent controls.” MTW —Anthony Pignataro

The ornery duo

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JANUARY 27, 2005

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MAUICOUNTY

BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO

THURSDAY, JAN. 20

For too long politicians have been silent on the issue of drugs and drug use. But not Lt. Governor James R. “Duke” Aiona. He thinks illegal drugs are bad, and he’s frankly not afraid to tell people. And really, thank God that at least one elected official is finally taking an anti-drug stance. Now, Duke Aiona wants a “balanced approach” to fighting drugs—wants it so bad he used the phrase four times in the press release he sent out yesterday. And what does that “balanced approach” include?

Stuff like giving out longer prison terms, “modernizing” the state’s “grossly outdated electronic surveillance laws” and prohibiting the sale of “flasks, pipes, testing equipment”—Scales?

Bunsen Burners? Autoclaves?—and other “drug paraphernalia.” Oh, and don’t forget tough, new “mandatory sentencing” laws—including a provision to force judges to sentence people who buy liquor for a minor to a year in jail.

Say, Republicans like Aiona are always crying like little girls about so-called “activist” judges who, they say, “legislate from the bench”—usually in the area of civil rights, by trying to stop government from taking more and more of our civil rights. Yeah, that really puts Republican panties in a twist. Yet every chance they get, Republican lawmakers try to adjudicate from congress by passing mandatory sentencing laws that take away judicial powers. But hey—politics is all about the hypocrisy, right?

They’re still having a ball at all them Inaugural Balls in Washington, but Governor Linda Lingle decided to let all us press people know that she really thought George W. Bush’s speech today was peachy keen. And why shouldn’t she? Don’t all decent, good-hearted Americans care much more about a president’s words than his actions?

“President Bush delivered a very powerful speech,” Her Majesty wrote, apparently agreeing with the president’s risky decision to denounce evil in all its forms. And she said her favorite part was when Dubya resolved to “end tyranny around the world.” And the good news is he’s going to start right here! Hey, just kidding, folks—Bush really has no plans to end any of our tyrannical actions like beating prisoners or invading sovereign nations which don’t actually pose a threat to us. Lingle also swooned when Dubya spoke of our nation’s youth. “I was also moved when the President reached out to the young people of our country and called upon them to look beyond individual desires”—awwwww yeaaaahhhhh—“and serve a cause of their choice and contribute to the character of our country,” she added. And she’s right, because no president has ever, ever asked young people to, oh, “ask what you can do for your country.” Oh wait, that was John F. Kennedy in 1961. My bad.

FRIDAY, JAN. 21 This afternoon—okay, it was two months ago, but who cares—I was talking to a friend about television reality shows. “I don’t watch any of them,” she said. “They’re all really awful.” At the time I agreed, but now—thanks to a press release Los Angeles-based Authentic Entertainment just sent me—I

OVERHEARD...

“HELLO?” “YES.” “WHERE ARE YOU?” “I’M OVER HERE.” “OH, YES. I SEE YOU NOW.” -Man and woman talking on their cell phones inside Blockbuster Video in Kihei, Jan. 23

COCONUT WIRELESS THE WEEK IN REVIEW

now know that I was wrong, wrong, WRONG! That’s because the upcoming Mar. 7 episode of Vacation Home Search—the Travel Channel program that lets us common peasants watch real, live rich people buy vacation homes—will be about Deepak Chopra trying to buy a house on Maui. That’s right—THE Deepak Chopra! The Indian guy who traded in his successful Boston medical practice for a fabulously wealthy life peddling books, CDs and videos that claim people can heal diseases like cancer through “happy thoughts.” I’m so amazed that Chopra and his wife Kathleen are flying all the way here from Monte Sereno, California to buy a new… um, wait a sec— doesn’t Chopra live in San Diego? Oh, I get it.

See, I didn’t read the whole thing: this is apparently about another Deepak Chopra.

Apparently, this one is just some guy who owns his own business in Silicon Valley. I must have skipped over the description “not

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the famous Indian spiritual advisor” that appears after his name. Yeah. So this is just another reality show that sucks, right?

SATURDAY, JAN. 22 The sun! It’s out! And former kidnap victim Elizabeth Smart is playing The Star Spangled Banner on the harp at the Hula Bowl! Is this a great country or what!

SUNDAY, JAN. 23 Um, it is, right?

MONDAY, JAN. 24 Lingle gave her annual State of the State Address today, which was long and pretty routine, except for that kinda weird part where she called eBay one of the “world’s most respected companies.” I mean, I’ve got nothing personal against the internet auction house and all—without them, the peoples of the world would still be hocking their old junk on their front lawns—but it doesn’t exactly have the same ring as your Ford or Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream… Oh, and she also said that the affordable housing situation in Hawaii is so dire that the state needs “faster government approvals” for new projects. Now that’s just what we—and by “we,” I mean “big developers”—need. Let’s throw out our requirements for environmental impact studies and traffic analyses! Let’s just build cheap housing for the poor people fast, fast, fast!

Who cares if it’s got shoddy construction or will fall down in winds in excess of eight knots? They’re just poor people, right?

TUESDAY, JAN. 25 More than 100 people bitched to the Honolulu Advertiser this weekend over a story they ran on state Representative Jerry Chang (D, Hilo) and his plan to road test all drivers over 75, according to today’s paper. The best was Jeanette Barney, 77, who said, “Is that guy from Hilo going to take me golfing every week? I go golfing twice a week and if I had to sit home instead I’d just get old and die.”

Anthony Pignataro is the author of the critically acclaimed best seller Come Clean: What The Government Doesn’t Want You To Know About Soap. MTW

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WEDNESDAY, JAN. 19

NEWSOFTHEWEIRD DRUNK TIMES Editor Frank Kelly Rich’s bimonthly tribute to overdrinking—the magazine Modern Drunkard—is a 50,000-circulation glossy “about drinking and only about drinking, and not just drinking, but heavy drinking,” he told the Los Angeles Times in January. Recent features included biographies of great drunks, a dictionary of bar slang, and a testimonial on how drinking cured one man’s fear of flying. “The most accomplished people,” Rich said, “have been drinkers.” He implied that people in the Middle East ought to drink more. Calling serious drinkers an “oppressed minority,” Rich said he himself has about eight drinks a day, sometimes up to 30—when he frequently blacks out. Said Rich’s wife, of her husband’s career, “When you find your calling, you have to go with it.”

TIME IS OF THE ESSENCE Austrian artist Muhammad Mueller started a project in November, as political commentary, in which two people at a time dig a tunnel from the city of Graz to Gradec, Slovenia, 42 miles away, using only shovels. He estimated the venture would take 5,600 years. And in July, a federal appeals court rejected the Environmental Protection Agency’s leak-safety standards for the longawaited nuclear waste repository at Nevada’s Yucca Mountain. The EPA had found the proposed site safe until the year 12,000 A.D., but the court said that wasn’t long enough. In fact, it noted that one National Academy of Sciences report recommended protection until the year 302,000 A.D.

BY CHUCK SHEPHERD

ACHIEVING THE PERFECT SOCIETY In the fall of 2004, Ron Nunn Elementary School in Brentwood, California ended its “Golden Circle” program, which officials soured on because it honored only kids with good grades, and established in its place the “Eagle Society,” which also celebrates personal, nonacademic achievements. The principal said he could not bear to see the sad faces of kids left out of the Golden Circle and wanted “all of our kids to be honored.” And in January the city council of Ota, Japan implemented a policy requiring male city workers to take six separate weeks of paid leave sometime before their new child’s first birthday so that, according to one official, “men [get] involved in raising children.”

WOMEN SCORNED Olga Abramovich, 49, was arrested in Brooklyn, New York in October and charged as the person who, in a rage, had painted as many as 20 swastikas on buildings and cars in predominantly Jewish neighborhoods. Police said Abramovich, a Christian, was upset that her ex-husband had re-married to a Jewish woman 14 years younger than she. And Julie Rose, 37, was convicted of assault in Yeovil, England in October for angrily slapping a new neighbor. The victim had apparently provoked Rose by declining her welcome-to-the-neighborhood suggestion that the Roses and the new couple engage in mate-swapping.

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BRIGHT IDEAS Antonio Hernandez, 29, pleaded guilty in Salt Lake City in December to hijacking a Greyhound bus that had just left Green River, Utah, intending to use it to smash into his estranged wife’s trailer home. He was stopped at the hijack scene, but if he hadn’t been captured, he would still have had to drive the bus all the way to the woman’s home, in Lexington, Neb., 500 miles away.

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OPED

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HAIR ON MAUI AS TOLD TO SAMANTHA CAMPOS

Anna Larson Hair stylist, Paragon Salon My mom has really fine, thin hair. When I was young, I had thick, blonde hair and she made me wear it long. Every morning, she would do my hair in every style possible: in curls, French braids, side twists, half-up/half-down, pigtails and then the waving iron. I just wanted to cut my hair.

I remember seeing the boys by the bus stop in the ‘80s, with their bowl cut, platinumblonde-on-top-and-black-underneath hairdos and I wanted that. But I wasn’t allowed to even cut my hair until the sixth grade. And then I cut it up to my ears.

My mom had this hairstylist named Australia, who would talk about boys and cuss with me. I thought she was so cool ‘cause she was the first person to talk to me like I wasn’t just a kid.

In high school, I wanted to cut my hair even shorter but we compromised with an asymmetrical cut. Then sophomore year, I started bleaching and getting really obsessed with hair.

I started going to a stylist named Tammy.

She was the coolest—she had red lipstick and a purse with a voodoo doll and fringe on it. I was 14 years old. I began planning cuts and colors for every month.

I did my 1,600 hours of beauty school and got an apprenticeship in the biggest salon in Sacramento. I worked full time and attended two cutting classes per week for a year. The owner said, “You’ve got the ability—stick with it.”

So I finished my apprenticeship, moved on to another salon, met Mark and moved to Maui. I got a job at a salon called Ambience, where I met Cammie. That was six years ago. Cammie and I decided to go into business together and opened Paragon Salon in Makawao. And Mark and I got married. MTW

The Cold War between China and the Soviet Union, had been dead for a decade when I made the trip from what is now called the Kyrgyz Republic to western China in 1999. Although troops no longer massed for possible war at this border, crossing the high-altitude Torugart Pass remained an arduous bureaucratic odyssey. Getting out of Kyrgyzstan required presenting a special exit visa at a dozen checkpoints on the way up to the border outpost. A dirt track took me through 20 kilometers of no-man’s land to the political border, which was only open on Fridays between 9 a.m. and noon.

When my Chinese driver arrived on the other side of a bullet-pocked faux tri-

says Clinton Labor Secretary Robert Reich.

“Require it to be filled with an American and employers have to raise the wage.”

Most employers don’t hire illegal workers.

But they all benefit from the downward pressure illegal immigration puts on wages. It’s simple supply and demand: if we deported every undocumented worker, companies would be forced to increase pay at the bottom from sub-minimum to minimum wage levels.

This would force employers to entice those currently working for the legal minimum wage with raises, and so on up the scale. Labor costs account for about two-thirds of the expenses of an average business. The last “reform” corporate America wants is a genuine crackdown on illegal immigration. And Congress, reliant on

OUR BORDERS ARE OPEN ON PURPOSE. umphal arch marking the border, two Chinese soldiers accompanied him to sign for me, Checkpoint Charlie style. On the Chinese side came another 20 kilometers of DMZ: minefields, row after row of razorwire, watchtowers, the dirt raked regularly in order to reveal the footsteps of would-be illegal immigrants.

Why is it, then, that the wealthier and technologically sophisticated United States, can’t seal its much shorter border with Mexico—the source of 70 percent of its illegal immigrants? Because it doesn’t want to.

The INS estimates that there are about nine million illegal immigrants, mostly Mexican, living and working in the United States. With about 300,000 more entering the country annually—not including migrant laborers who travel back and forth—a staggering 10 percent of the U.S. workforce is currently undocumented.

George W. Bush, master plagiarist of liberal catchphrases, says illegal immigrants “take the jobs that Americans won’t take.” A more accurate reading of the situation is that because these workers’ illegal status makes them vulnerable to exploitation, employers create jobs for them to take—while eliminating better jobs for Americans.

Rapacious employers use illegals to fill two types of jobs: those that would otherwise go to Americans and those that exist only because it’s possible to pay slave wages. What would happen to the agricultural and garment sectors, which employ hundreds of thousands of illegal immigrants in both categories, without illegal labor? Both industries would survive, though their bosses might have to make do without a Paris pied-à-terre.

“The only reason any job remains unfilled is because the wage is too low,”

business for campaign contributions, isn’t about to start one.

Our borders are open on purpose. While 150,000 U.S. soldiers fight a useless war in Iraq, fewer than 2,000 INS agents patrol the Mexican and Canadian borders—5,300 miles—combined. Hundreds of miles of border are unmarked by anything as formidable as a chain-link fence, much less the kind of we-mean-business fortifications built by the old USSR. Signs posted north of the San Diego-Tijuana crossing warn motorists to look out for Mexican families running across Interstate 5. Eleven states, recognizing the reality of the illegals in their midst, issue them driver’s licenses.

Now the Bush Administration, backed by big business, wants to tacitly endorse illegal immigration by granting existing undocumented workers “guest worker” status.

While we encourage illegal immigration, we’ve made it virtually impossible for a foreigner who dreams of becoming an American to do so legally. Legal immigration is limited to people who already have relatives here, are sponsored by an employer or are seeking political asylum from a tiny list of approved countries. Had these rules been enforced since 1776, there would be more Native Americans than any other variety.

A sane immigration policy would reverse these attitudes. We should welcome legal immigrants in much larger numbers. After all, America has always become culturally richer and economically more prosperous as the result of its hard-working newcomers. Legal immigration should become safe, legal and commonplace. At the same time, no nation worthy of the name can tolerate porous borders. We can and must seal our borders to prevent economic migrants, terrorists and others with unknown motives from entering the United States. It’s time to stop sucking up to big business. MTW

SURF&SPORTS

BY COURTNEY MATHER

New Year Plunge

PHOTO: WWW.TROPICALLIGHT.COM

Maui hosts the only sane Polar Bear swim in the world I was 15 when I first heard of J.R. Jarosh’s annual ritual of welcoming the New Year with a solitary plunge into the icy winter waters of Lake Michigan. I thought he was crazy.

Now, 20 years later, Jarosh no longer takes his dip alone. Each Jan. 1, the Polar Bear Club of Jacksonport, Wisconsin and hundreds of other regional Polar Bear Clubs around the world join him. On my end, I have grown older and wiser and have acquired a much better understanding of human nature. Now I know they’re crazy.

Christine Andrews, who founded the Polar Bear Swim on Maui six years ago, has done her best to inject some sanity to the event.

“A group of us ‘pink-capped’ swimmers were regularly swimming between Makena Landing and Big Beach,” says Andrews. “The reef was so beautiful with the colorful fish and so many friendly turtles that we thought it would be great to share this with others. What better way than to host a swimming event? But, we also wanted to encourage the novice swimmer to try out the ocean. And, it was nearing the millennium.

“Behind the scenes, a certain two swimmers were always disqualified for wearing their fins in all the other organized swim races on Maui,” she continued. “So, why not create an event where they would be legal?”

It’s uncanny how similar Maui’s Polar Bear swim is to its Wisconsin predecessor.

For example, in both locations the water temperature matches that of the air. So in Wisconsin, people jump into a 32 degreelake. And Maui’s the exact same way, if

you add 40 degrees.

Both events have plenty of food and beverages for participants. When people finish the Maui event, organizers have plenty of Klondyke Ice Cream bars for them. Which is just like Wisconsin, though I think they might give out less ice cream.

Both events advise participants use appropriate footwear. In Wisconsin, Jarosh warns swimmers to wear old tennis shoes or “aqua socks.” This, he says, helps “prevent cuts on your feet from the ice and to prevent your feet from sticking to the snow and ice on shore.”

On Maui, Andrews recommends that swimmers wear fins because, quite logically, “This is the only organized race on Maui where you won’t be disqualified for doing so!” Or as returning race champion Spencer Eldred, 48, says, “Wearing fins just makes you go faster.”

Of course, entering the water from a sandy beach while wearing fins can be a daunting task. Some competitors jog backwards with one eye over the shoulder. Others dish out a snazzy side step. Some brave souls just face forward and go for it.

And both Wisconsin and Maui advise swimmers to bring plenty of post-race supplies. In Wisconsin, this translates into warm boots and blankets to prevent the onset of hypothermia. On Maui, swimmers should pack an extra tube of sun block or another swimsuit, so they can better soak up rays on the beach while digesting those Klondyke bars.

Of course, there is one rather large difference between the Maui and Wisconsin races.

Most Polar Bear swims consist of a brief dodge in and out of the water. Participants are barely under water long enough to open their eyes.

But on Maui, entrants have to swim 1.2

A daunting task miles. This gives participants plenty of time to enjoy the magnificent scenery along the course.

“The race takes you through an area called ‘Turtle Town,’” says race director Kimo Kaimikaua. “As the name implies, you are bound to see some fascinating marine life.”

Eldred disagrees. “People talk about seeing turtles, but I’ve never seen one,” he says.

“There’s no time to look around for turtles!”

Returning female race champion Jacky Takakura still managed to pull off some wildlife viewing without it holding her back from a victory last year.

“I saw two manta rays and several turtles,” she says of her last race. Takakura, now 36, began her swimming career on Maui three decades ago. She went on to compete for Baldwin High School. In 1996, she began swimming with Maui Masters Swim Club, where she trains today.

For Eldred, the Maui Polar Bear Swim is great because it’s the first race of the New Year. “It’s a great opportunity to see everyone after the holidays,” he says.

“I like the Polar Bear swim because it’s a scenic course, the competitors are fun and friendly, and fins make you go fast,” says Takakura. “My memories of last year’s race? A beautiful day, clear water and good guacamole.” MTW

Polar Bear Swim The race starts at 9 a.m. on Jan. 30 on the beach in front of the Maui Prince Hotel. Registration is $25. Entry forms may be downloaded from http://www.swimmaui.com. For additional race information, please contact Kimo Kaimikaua at 572-1718 or kipahulu@gte.net.

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Exploring Science City The strange world of Maui’s astronomers

By Barukh Shalev 10

JANUARY 27, 2005

COVER STORY

“Most of my work involves making tons and tons of data,” he says with a chuckle. “But seriously, it’s fascinating work, especially when you have some of the larger solar flares. The science behind it really motivates me. Check this out.”

He leads me outside to a set of towers.

“Now, these,” he shouts above the wind, “these are the towers which follow the sun and gives the orientation to which the telescope itself will follow!

These tell the telescope where to point! I gotta climb up here every morning and hook them up!

Now, follow me!”

We walk up an iron spiral staircase into the dome and find what looks like Marvin the Martian’s doomsday machine.

“This here is the actual telescope that looks at the sun,” Nitta says as we walk back down the staircase into a room filled with computers and printers. “The images go into here. This is what we call the imaging vector magnetograph.”

Like Magneto, from X-Men? “Um, no,” he says. “Like magneto as in magnetic images of the sun. Then a machine called a Coronagraph, like as in the corona of the sun, creates an artificial eclipse so we can see it. The sun, of course, is very bright and without this artificial eclipse, it would be hard to see anything.

“Much of what we do here revolves around the study of solar flares, why they happen, what they are all about,” he continues. “We do know they

A fascination with the heavens goes back to the dawn of civilization. For ancient man, the alignment of various stars, constellations and moons were intricately linked to space, time and direction. Modern astronomy grew out of the inevitable problems originating in the first civilizations.

Properly planting and harvesting crops, carrying out religious rituals, even deciding when to have sex all depended on the correct alignment of time and space.

Celestial movements gave man his first compass and the ability to predict animal migrations. The very fate of mankind hinged on his ability to understand the heavens.

For American Indians, Polynesians, Aboriginal Australians and Meso-Americans, astronomy was a matter of dogma. While the Babylonians, Greeks and Hindus were developing their own uses for astronomical thought, ancient Polynesians viewed the movements of the sun, moon and stars as evidence of supernatural wanderings.

The actual telescope

It’s 5 a.m. and I’m driving on a frigid cold road towards the summit at Haleakala National Park. It’s a perilous journey, and I think of Mark Twain writing in Roughing It that he “felt like the last man, neglected of the judgment and left pinnacled in midheaven, a forgotten relic of a vanished world.”

I’m unable to see beyond the narrow reach of my headlights and thus blissfully unaware of the sheer drop-offs and certain death that awaits me if I misjudge a turn. I turn on the radio, but find that only the cosmopolitanism of National Public Radio reaches these heights.

I see a sign saying I’m passing 8,000 feet. For the very first time I turn on the heater. The wind, rain and fog whips past me unmercifully, pushing my car menacingly close to the edge of the road.

Spooked, I slow to a stop, turn off the engine, headlights and This American Life so I can compose myself. Without the headlights, the world is very, very dark. I resume my journey with a newfound appreciation for the neat and tidy rows of reflectors guiding the way. They look like the lights in the aisle of a movie theater.

I arrive at Science City just as the sun is rising. I find a lunar landscape pocked with shiny silver domes and antennae. It reminds me of those old pulp science fiction novels.

This is where they’re going to build the world’s most advanced solar telescope. I’ve come up here to take a look around and see what’s up. Literally.

The place is quiet. The only movement comes from the twinkling lights perched atop the bizarre structures. To one side of the summit rays of sun burst through the clouds, but the other side is distorted by rolling fog. H.G. Wells or Ray Bradbury would find inspiration here.

I enter one of the buildings, but find more of a Soviet than sci-fi look. Shiny linoleum floors reflect the harsh light of florescent track lighting. Tacky couches sit unoccupied near 1960s-vintage chalkboards and Zenith television sets. Complex graphs and charts hang off the walls like afterthoughts. I almost expect to see my junior high school science teacher clutching a Bunsen burner.

The only person here at this early hour is Garry Nitta, chief observer of the Mees Solar Observatory.

For the past 14 years, he’s been rising early to come watch the skies. He works alone and prefers it that way.

“I like the peacefulness up here,” he says. “I can concentrate.”

Nitta has the researcher’s demeanor—quiet, involved and comprehensive. His hair is mussed and his eyes baggy. He looks like he sleeps at the observatory.

happen in a cycle of 22 years. We don’t know why exactly they occur. We have ideas, but we need more information. We don’t know why for instance, they occur on one part of the sun and not on the other.”

Why does it matter?

“Well, it affects things here, communication for example,” he says. “Haven’t you even seen ‘sun spots’ on your TV? They affect communication. You know, when Reagan was president, we once lost contact with Air Force One for an hour. Not many people knew that.”

Photos: Kirsten Guenther

Mike Maberry looks like he will burst out laughing.

“It’s the biggest solar observatory in the world,” the University of Hawaii Institute for Astronomy assistant director tells me giddily of the new scope that’s just been authorized. “It will be called the Advanced Technology Solar Telescope, or ATST for short and it will be the biggest breakthrough in astronomy since Galileo. With it we can see detail on the sun like never before. They looked at 40 sites to put it, narrowed it

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says, showing me a drawing of what looks like a Swedish meatball smashing into a globe, “were to happen on the border on India and Pakistan? They would nuke each other, that’s what!

“What happens is these guys, we call them transNeptunian objects—things that are just hangin’ around—they bump into each other and get pushed into our orbit. Then we can be in trouble. These things are huge. They would do immense damage if just one of them were to hit earth. Jupiter got hit with four of them, remember that? Talk about 9/11—9/11 is nothing. One of these hitting New York City or metropolitan Chicago would destroy life in those cities for many thousands of years.”

Now Maberry clicks on an image of a destroyed old Cadillac sitting in front of a motel. The Caddy has a sign on the windshield saying, “This car has been METEORIZED! See METEOR IN ROOM 155.”

Maberry tells me the meteor was the size of my

foot. I ask him what can possibly be done about these things.

“It’s not our job,” Maberry says, throwing his hands up. “Our job is to find them, then make it known that they are on their way. But something as minor as painting a stripe of white paint on the side of the meteor would change its trajectory so significantly that it might miss Earth. It sounds silly, but you can’t rule anything out.”

How about just nuking it like they do in the movies?

“What you don’t want to do is to blow it up,” he says. “This isn’t a movie, you know? You blow the meteor, then what? You get a shotgun effect, with chunks of meteor hitting earth everywhere.”

Well, it still sounds like a movie to me.

“It’s worse, in fact,” Maberry says, shaking his head. “More money has been spent on making movies about meteors hitting earth than actual research about them.” MTW

Marvin the Martian’s Doomsday Machine?

Chief Observer Garry Nitta Ancient Hawaiian astronomy revolved around agriculture and navigation. Combined with an extensive knowledge of winds and currents, knowledge of the placement of stars was crucial to navigating around the ocean. The arrival of Captain Cook in 1778 introduced compasses, clocks, charts, sextants and maps.

The era of modern Hawaiian astronomy can be traced back to the time of King David Kalakaua, who was, among other things a lawyer, musician, military officer, editor and amateur astronomer. In 1874, Kalakaua hosted the English Astronomy Expeditions Transit to Venus.

“It will afford me unfeigned satisfaction if my kingdom can add its quota toward the successful accomplishment of the most important astronomical observation of the present century and assist, however humbly, the enlightened nations of the earth in these costly enterprises,” he said at the exhibition.

In 1881, Kalakaua traveled the world. While in New York he visited Thomas Edison. The two men discussed generating electric power from the Kilauea volcano. He also visited the Lick observatory and was deeply influenced by what he saw there.

“Something of the kind is needed here very much, but we have so few people who take interest in scientific matters,” the king wrote in a letter home.

“Everybody is bent upon making money on sugar and the all mighty dollar.”

The king eventually got his wish. Not long after his return, he got a small telescope built above the Punahou School. But the scope wasn’t on a stable mount. So in 1956, it was moved to Honolulu and became the MacNeil Observatory and Science Center, which still stands today.

down to three: La Palma [in the Canary Islands], Big Bear and Haleakala. We are excited.”

Maberry’s office is featureless, with a few computers, books and family pictures lying around. It’s the office of a man who disdains offices. On one wall is a photograph of him firing an Uzi. Maberry has a small frame but is built solidly. He sports the walrus mustache favored by police officers and the Village People.

“All the biggest, baddest telescopes in the world have a very narrow view of things,” Maberry says, making an hourglass shape with his hands. “They can see very far and very powerfully, but only a certain spot and it becomes very cumbersome and time-consuming to try and do a comprehensive survey of our galaxy. Part of the problem is that there are just too many stars in the galaxy to do it right.”

Maberry is a busy man. He often travels and on his desk in his small office sit airplane itineraries for Chile and Washington D.C. He’s just returned from a conference in Arizona. There are only so many places where you can build observatories, so astronomers spend much time going back and forth between these places, comparing notes and conducting research.

“Science City, you should know, isn’t really the name for this place,” Maberry says. “That was made up by some Maui News guy back in the 1960s.

Nobody actually calls it that anymore. [It’s] the Haleakala High Altitude Observatory Site. That’s the real name of it. Not Science City. Don’t call it that.”

Oh. “Back in the spring of 1951, a guy by the name of Grot Reber wanted to find the best place to undertake radio astronomy experiments,” Maberry tells me. “He knew that Mauna Kea and Mauna Loa were really the best because of their height, but Haleakala was even better because of it’s accessibility. Have you ever tried to go to Mauna Loa? Imagine doing it in 1951 with scientific instruments. Then you’ll know why he picked Haleakala.”

Mike pulls out a humungous cardboard photograph. “This is an above shot of the whole complex,” he says. Then he points at one spot. “This building started growing. It’s owned by the Air Force with a ‘no cost lease.’ I can’t tell you what’s going on with that because I have no idea.

“The university is only in charge of a couple buildings here,” Maberry says, pointing to some other spots. Looking at the ceiling, he rattles off names like Mees Observatory, Zodiacal Light Observatory (ZLO) and Lunar Ranging Experiment (LURE).

“We live and die by acronyms, by the way,” he says.

“What we are going to do with PAN-STARRS is to survey the whole sky, weather permitting and build a very detailed catalog of all the objects in the sky,” Maberry tells me. “As you monitor how objects move, you can, for example, track irregularities in the solar system. In other words, find things that go ‘bump in the night.’ After all, it’s not a matter of if, but when will we be hit by matter from space. It has happened before and it will happen again. Our primary focus is to find objects in the 200-meter range, things that can cause some very real damage to life on earth. Look at this-” Maberry opens a power point presentation on his computer. “Here is the asteroid belt, in between Mars and Jupiter,” he says, tracing his mouse curser over a cacophony of white spots on the screen.

“See that, as you can see, there is a lot of crap that can happen.

“Can you imagine what would happen if this,” he

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11

ONO KINEGRINDS

BY ERIC CAMPBELL

Eating and Talking People-watching at the Nagasako Okazuya My mother always said that if you want to get a feel for a neighborhood, hang out in front of the local grocery store. She was right, as she was about most things, but she probably couldn’t know how right she would be in the case of the patio by the Nagasako Okazuya/Deli in the Old Lahaina Center.

It’s more of an eating place in the daytime. Well, eating and talking.

In the morning, parents and their kids come and go quick. Crew after crew of working class folk grab a Loco Moco for breakfast or a sandwich for later before they race off. But a lot of times they just sit together at one of the three tables.

Sometimes they spread across the 12 stone stools like the family picnic. I love to hang out there and just listen.

“You like fish, brah?” one guy asked me the other day. “It’s Ahi, the bloodmeat. The best part.”

The banter ebbs and flows like the ocean, which is only a block away.

“Do you like San Diego this week?”

“The old man, he never say no. I ask loan for $40, $60. He never say no.”

“A good man, Brother Joe—he gave us dried fish on Molokai.”

“Menehunes got in your tool box.”

The people-watching possibilities are endless at Nagasako’s.

During the holidays, a local Salvation Army volunteer over by the front door of nearby Foodland became the object of humor for several old Filipino guys at the patio. Not to be outdone, the Hawaiian Santa’s helper, complete with red hat, red board shorts, red wife-beater shirt and red high-top shoes, stopped ringing his bell and proceeded to engage in a Yuletide hula.

Another day, a mentally challenged youth, who was apparently working pushing carts of groceries out to customer’s cars, took great offense at being bumped

by another customer’s basket. It took dozens of passers-by about 25 minutes to get the youth back into the store. I never saw him again.

Sometimes, I don’t know what to make of the other customers.

“Rubbish,” said an elderly woman, shaking her head as she threw away a bag. She said nothing as she ate her plate lunch and left. In an instant, a battalion of birds descended on the table where she had been eating. They fearlessly devoured any crumbs she left behind.

As I watched them, two teenagers whizzed by on a scooter. No way they were 16.

Nissan pulled alongside the patio, and she got Often, the people driving or cycling by watch in, clutching a variety of well-used plastic us. No matter if the radio is on, the cellphone is shopping bags. to the ear, there’s a nod, smile or shaka.

As night fell, a teen with a shaved head and “You from Maui?” a guy at my table sudlong bangs worked a plate of shoyu chicken denly asked me. with chopsticks. A portly, silver-haired genI’d been lost in thought and hadn’t even tleman stopped a girl noticed him. After my to ask about her mothToastmasters introducer. Lit only by the stairtion he said, “Yeah, I Old Lahaina Center, Lahaina, 661-0985. $ well lamp and the know Duval Street nearby lamppost, their from when I was in the conversation continued for an hour. He Navy there.” He explained that he comes here seemed to know everyone—their kids, who to feed the birds, even if he has to dig in the they are dating. But I never could get a word garbage to do it. in to find out who he was.

“Got shrimp?” a familiar older lady asked No worries, I will see him and the rest of me from another table. them again. Mom really knew what she was “Not today,” I said, realizing that she doestalking about. MTW n’t yet know I quit working at that place. A red

Nagasako Okazuya/Deli

I could talk all day about that guy’s hat

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Dragon Dragon Chinese Restaurant Excellent service and fair prices with dishes like Kung Pao Chicken, Crispy Gau Gee Mein and Honey Walnut Prawns. Maui Mall, Kahului, 8931628. $

Marco’s Grill Deli - A lavish and beautiful setting complements the hearty Italian food and excellent wines. 444 Hana Hwy, Kahului, 877-4446. $$

Dish - Every month, the owner and manager decide on a different “menu” of 14 entrees, of which you select 12 to assemble in their kitchen. Sessions available Wed-Sat. 150 Hana Highway, Kahului, 877-1414. $$ Dunes Restaurant - Exciting revisions of local and American breakfast, lunch and dinner favorites. Maui Lani Golf Course, Kahului, 877–7461. $$ Fiesta Time - Superior Mexican taqueria.

Maui Coffee Roasters - Ono grinds and freshly roasted coffee in a fun and casual atmosphere makes this the place to take five. 444 Hana Hwy, Kahului, 877–CUPS. $ Maui Beach Hotel - Buffet-style restaurant featuring different foods each night. Features range from Shabu Shabu (tons of meat) to sushi and Japanese. 170 Ka’ahumanu Ave., Kahului, 877-0051. $$ Maui Mix Plate - Traditional foods of the varied ethnic groups who call Hawaii home. 70 Ka’ahumanu Ave, Kahului, 877-0706. $

Dollar amounts are based on dinner for two, not including beverages, tax & tip.

Maui Tacos - Featuring tacos and burritos with chargrilled steak, chicken and seafood marinated in juices and island spices. 275 Kaahumanu Ave, Queen Kaahumanu Mall, Kahului, 871-7726. $ Mike’s Restaurant - Authentic Chinese cooking and ono local grinds. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Also offers catering. 1900 E. Main St., Wailuku, 2447888. $ Piñata’s - Fresh and wholesome Mexican food from the kitchen sink burritos to quesadillas. Casual dining and various piñatas available. 395 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 877–8707. $ Pulehu BBQ - Local plate lunches with a Southern smokehouse twist. 1500 Lower Main St., Wailuku, 244-4049 or 244-6159. $ Ruby’s - Walk down memory lane at this fabulous ‘50s cafe. Old time American dining morning to night.

Queen Ka`ahumanu Center, Kahului, 248-7829. $ Saeng’s Thai Cuisine - Vegetarian, meat and seafood Thai entrees served in a casual garden setting. 2119 Vineyard, Wailuku, 244-1567. $$ Saigon Cafe - Wailuku’s hidden secret! Delicious and affordable Vietnamese cuisine with excellent service. 1792 Main, Wailuku, 243-9560. $$ Sam Sushi - Located inside Wow-Wee Cafe with over 20 years of experience in the food industry.

Catering and party trays available. 333 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 873-6400. $ Sandalwood Golf Course Restaurant - Lunch with a view, served from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. 2500 Honoapiilani Hwy, Waikapu, 242-6000. $$ Sheik’s Restaurant - Local favorites include Loco Moco and Shoyu Chicken. 97 Wakea Ave, Kahului, 877-0121. $ Simply Sweets Bakery - Delicious pastries, savory pizza, hot dogs, ham and cheese pastries, rolls and deli sandwhiches. 150 Hana Hwy. Kahului. 893-0700 $ Siu’s Chinese Kitchen - Fast food Chinese with daily specials. All entrees are served with rice or noodles. 70 E Kaaumanu Ave., Maui Mall, 871-0828. $ Squeaky’s Family Restaurant - “A Taste of Philadelphia” with real Philly cheesesteak, pan fried trout and vegetarian meatloaf. Open for breakfast. 197 North Market Street, Wailuku, 244-4100. $ Stillwell’s Bakery & Cafe - Specialty cakes and desserts, breads and pastries. Sandwiches, salads and soups for lunch. Open 6 a.m.-4 p.m. Mon-Sat. 1740 Kaahumanu Ave, Wailuku, 243-2243. $

Sushi Go - Presents a concept unlike anything we’ve seen on Maui: Conveyor-belt sushi. Queen Ka'ahumanu Center, Kahului, 877-8744. $ Sub Paradise - Maui’s famous subs since 1990.

Coffee, an extensive list of breakfast bagels, sub sandwiches and salads. Open M-F 7 - p.m Sat 7-5pm, Sun 7-4pm 395 E. Dairy Rd, 877-8779.

Takamiya Market - Plate lunches, homemade corned beef, sashim and tossed salads. Catering and banquet facility available. 359 N. Markety St., Wailuku, 244-3404. $ Tasty Crust - Local style cuisine for breakfast (try their famous hotcakes), lunch and dinner. Serving Maui since 1944. 1770 Mill, Wailuku, 244-0845. $ Tiffany’s - Featuring 103 items of local and Asian entrees, Bento boxes, noodles and fish. Featuring DJ and Karaoke. Open 10:30 a.m.-2 a.m. 1424 Lower Main St. Wailuku 249-0052. $ Tin Ying Chinese Restaurant - A Hong Kong-style Chinese seafood restaurant. They have over 100 menu choices at reasonable prices. Buffet style lunch, take-out, as well as sit down dining. 1088 Lower Main St., Wailuku, 242-4371. $ Tokyo Tei - Lunch and dinner featuring teriyaki beef and fish, tempura, katsu, saimin and more. 1063 E. Lower Main St., Wailuku, 242-9630. $ Valley Isle Seafood - Known for their luau stew, along with several choices of seafood. 475 Hukilike St., Kahului, 873-4847. $ Wei Wei BBQ & Noodle House - Very affordable Chinese cuisine, counter service and delicious noodle dishes. 210 Imikala St., Wailuku, 242-7928. $ Wow-Wee Maui Cafe - Unique candy bars, ice cream shakes, bagels, coffees, sandwiches and soups. Also a Hawaiian menu, kava kava, sushi and oxygen bar. 333 Dairy Rd., Kahului, 871-1414. $

SOUTH MAUI Alexander’s Fish & Chips - Affordable take-out seafood, chicken, ribs—all deep fried tempura style or grilled. 1913 S Kihei Rd., 874-0788. $ Antonio’s - Italian cuisine in a cozy atmosphere with an extensive wine list and friendly service. Trust me-try the Tiramisu. 1215 S. Kihei Rd., 875-8800. $$ Aroma D’Italia Ristorante - Southern Italian cuisine and full wine list at reasonable prices. Open MonSat, 5-9 p.m. 1881 S Kihei Rd., 879-0133. $$ Ashley’s South Shore Cafe - Affordable breakfast, lunch and dinner with burgers, local plates, fresh

Environmentally Aware • 100% Recycled Newsprint Paper • Soy Based Dye Ink • Biodiesel Delivery

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 27, 2005

13

DININGLISTINGS PRICE GUIDE

$→$10-$20

island fish, comfort foods and deli sandwiches.

362 Hukulii Pl. (behind Tesoro gas station), Kihei, 874-8600. $ BadaBing! - Home of the Rat Pack Bar. Pizzas, pastas and Italian specialties created with love and a little attitude. $10 wines and kids eat free on Monday and Saturday. 1945 S Kihei Rd., 875–0188. $$

$$→$20-$40

$$$→$40 and up

K→Kama’aina Discount

Vegetarian. Open M-Sa 10 am - 9pm Su 10 am - 8pm.

2395 S. Kihei Rd 112. 875-2910. $ Fernando’s - Authentic Mexican food. Open 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. daily. 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei, 879-9952. $ Ferraro’s - Gourmet Italian cuisine oceanfront with live violin and guitar, outdoor kiawe-wood-burning oven, all-day lunches and cucina rustica dinners. Four Seasons Resort Wailea, 874-8000. $$$

Ma’alaea Waterfront Restaurant - Seafood and Continental cuisine. Open for dinner daily from 5 p.m.

Milowai Condominium, 50 Hauoli St., 244-9028. $$ Marco’s South Side Grill - A lavish and beautiful setting complements the hearty Italian food and excellent wines. 1445 S Kihei Rd., 874–4041. $$ Maui Espresso & Shave Ice - Finest Hawaiian shave ice, a full service coffee kiosk, fruit smoothies and shakes. 2439 S. Kihei Rd., 874-0414. $

Big Wave Cafe - Small cafe serving Pacific Rim cuisine, including lobster and sweet corn fritters with furikake tartar sauce and coconut shrimp with fruit salsa and ginger lilikoi sauce.

Open daily. 1215 S Kihei Rd., 891-8688. $

Five Palms Restaurant - Local produce and fish featuring Pacific Rim seafood. Breakfast, lunch, pupus and dinner. Open 8 a.m.-9 p.m. 2960 S. Kihei Rd., 879–2607. $$

Bistro Molokini - Blend of California and island cuisine. Serves lunch and dinner.

Poolside. Grand Wailea, 875-1234. $$

Harry’s Sushi Bar - Japanese cuisine with fresh and delicious sushi. Open 5 p.m.-12 a.m. 100 Ike Drive, Wailea, 879-7677. $$

Bocalino Bistro & Bar - Affordably priced Mediterranean cuisine. Open for dinner. Its late night menu is available until 1 a.m. 1279 S. Kihei Rd., 874-9299. $$

Horhitos Mexican Cantina - Burritos, salads, appetizer and “food for gringos.” Located next to Hapa’s Nightclub. Open 5 p.m. to 2 a.m. Mon.-Sat. 41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei, 891-MEXI. $

Blue Marlin Harbor Front Grill & Bar - Get amazing seafood, steaks, sandwiches, pizza and sushi. Eat outdoors overlooking the Ma’alaea Fishing Fleet. Ma’alaea Harbor Village, 2448844. $$

Hula Moon - Enjoy breakfast, lunch, dinner or a champagne Sunday brunch in an open air tropical setting with spectacular ocean views. Featuring fresh Hawaiian fish.

3700 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 874-7831. $$$

Pita Paradise - Good food served fast. Serves up a mean Mediterranean-style “gyro” along with salads and wraps in an outdoor lanai. Kihei Kalama Village Center, 875–7679. $

Humuhumunukunukuapua’a - Hawaiian and Polynesian cuisine served oceanside. Grand Wailea Resort, 875-1234 ext. 4900. $$$

Royal Thai Cuisine - Thai food with a large selection of vegetarian dishes. Open for lunch (Mon-Fri) and dinner (nightly). 1280 S. Kihei Rd., 874-0813. $

Jawz Tacos - Island-style tacos and burritos, including your choice of vegetarian, mahi mahi, ono, shrimp, chicken or steak. Impressive salsa bar. The taco salads are da bomb! 1280 S Kihei Rd., 874-TACO. $

Roy’s Bar & Grill - Mouth-watering Hawaiian fusion entrees in a spacious and upbeat atmosphere. Open nightly from 5:30 to 10 p.m. Reservations recommended. Piilani Shopping Center, 303 Piikea Ave., Kihei, 891-1120. $$$

Buzz’s Warf - Steaks, seafood and more, including Sweet Paradise Prawns. Reservations recommended. Ma’alaea Harbor Village, 2445426. $$ Cafe Kiowai - Authentic Japanese fare prepared along centuries-old traditional lines.

Casual dining in a relaxed garden setting. 5400 Makena Alanui, Maui Prince Hotel, 874--1111.$$ Caffe Ciao - Italian cuisine baked in a Kiawe wood oven. Open for lunch and dinner. Dine outdoors poolside. The Fairmont Kea Lani, Wailea, 875-4100. $$

Joy’s Place - “Smart eating” featuring organic foods which are low fat, low salt and wheat free. Open Mon thru Sat, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. 1993 S. Kihei Rd., 879-9258. $ Kai Ku Ono - A tapas-style menu with a special late night menu and sushi. Serving breakfast, lunch and dinner with a bar and lounge area. 2511 S Kihei Rd., 875–1007. $$

Capische? - Contemporary Italian with a twist and an extensive wine list. Commanding ocean views from every table. Wailea Diamond Resort, 879–2224. $$$

Kihei Caffe - Affordable breakfast and lunch with lanai seating, hearty portions, tasty sandwiches, huli chicken and fresh fish. 1945 S. Kihei Rd., 879-2230. $

Cafe Del Sol - Sandwiches and fresh fish with daily specials. Open for breakfast and lunch. 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. 3620 Baldwin Ave, Makowa 572-4877. $

Life’s a Beach - Food and drinks in a fun atmosphere. Nachos, burritos, prime rib and grilled mahi mahi are just some of the specialties. 1913 S. Kihei Rd., 891–8010. $

Cyberbean Internet Cafe - Gourmet coffee, espresso, cappucino, latte, sandwiches, smoothies and salads. 1881 S Kihei, 879-4799. $

Lobster Cove - Seafood, steak and lobster at its best in a relaxed and casual atmosphere. Open 5 p.m. to midnight daily. 100 Ike Dr., Wailea, 879–7677. $$$

Da Kitchen - Huge portions of local Hawaiian food. Plate lunches, steak plates and amazing chicken katsu. Very casual--sit and eat or get your food to go. 2439 S Kihei Rd., 875-7782. $

Longhi’s Wailea - Seafood, meat and pasta entrees with many not listed on the menu. Ask the server for details. 3750 Wailea Alanui Dr., 891–8883. $$$

Denny’s - Open 24 hours for breakfast, lunch and dinner with omelets, burger and salads.

2763 S. Kihei Rd., 879-8600.

LuLu’s - Ribs, burgers, chicken wings, Black ‘n Blue Ahi and more in a fun, upbeat tiki-fied atmosphere with a huge bar and open-air deck. 1941 S. Kihei Rd., 879-9944. $

Enrique’s Resturant - Athentic Mexican Food. Fajitas, Seafood, Shrimp Tequilia Fish Tacos, Enchiladas, Tamales, Burritos and

Ma`alaea Grill - Reasonably priced fine dining overlooking the harbor from the Maui Ocean Center.

Ma`alaea Harbor Village, 243–2206. $$

Pulehu BBQ Shack Crossword 3

2

1

ACROSS 1. PULEHU SHACK. Maui’s #1 Southern______ Restaurant.

4. ______ Back Ribs 5. Cole______ 6. Freebee DOWN 2. The best Hawaiian wood used for BBQ 3. Key ingredient in Uncle Mo’s Sweet BBQ Sauce 4. Beka’s Famous _____ Beans

4 5 6

Pulehu

K E

BBQ Shack

14

Dollar amounts are based on dinner for two, not including beverages, tax & tip.

JANUARY 27, 2005

DINING

TAKE OUT BBQ & CATERING 1500-A Lower Main St. Wailuku

244-4049

Maui Tacos - Featuring tacos and burritos with chargrilled steak, chicken and seafood marinated in juices and spices from the islands. 2411 S. Kihei Road, Kamaole Beach Center, 879-5005. $ Mulligan’s On the Blue - Maui’s authentic Irish pub, plenty o’Irish food, whiskey and beer. Breakfast served till 3 p.m 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874–1131. $ Nick’s Fishmarket - Fine dining in open air and elegance with amazing seafood dishes and fresh fish.

Fairmont Kea Lani, Wailea, 879–7224. $$$

Sansei Restaurant - Japanese-based Pacific Rim dining, sushi bar and late night menu. Award-winning cuisine with early bird and late night specials. 1881 S. Kihei Rd., 879–0004. $$ K Sarento’s on the Beach - Contemporary dining near the water’s edge. Italian cuisine that’s very romantic. Private VIP table available. 2980 S. Kihei Rd., 875–7555. $$$ Seawatch - Hawaii regional cuisine utilizing the freshest island fish and produce. Open for breakfast and lunch 8 a.m to 3 p.m, dinner 5:30 p.m. 100 Wailea Golf Club Drive, Wailea, 875-8080. $$ Shabu Shabu Toji - Healthy and delicious Japanese style fondue, beef, pork, or seafood and veggies.

Open for lunch Wed-Fri; dinner 5:30-9:30 p.m. nightly.

1280 S. Kihei Rd. #120, 875-8366. $

sandwiches, mai-tais and the best pizza. Awesome outdoor seating on the Aloha Jungle Lanai. Open 11 a.m. - 2 a.m. serving food 'till midnite! Kihei Kalama Village, 874-6444 $ Sports Page Bar & Grill - Over 100 menu items, including 1/2 lb burgers and deli sandwhiches with 24 T.V.’s, and a full bar. Open 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. 2411 S. Kihei Rd, 879-0602. $ Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Cafe - Relaxed island luxury in ambience and cuisine, with ocean views and live music. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983. $$ Tony Roma’s - Famous for ribs, barbequed chicken and onion ring loaf, along with daily specials. 1819 S. Kihei Road, 875-1104. $$ Vietnamese Cuisine - Hawaiian Opakapaka filet, soft shell crab and New York steak. Open 10:30 a.m9:30 p.m. Azeka Place I, Kihei, 875-2088. $$ Yorman’s By The Sea - Southern Pacific Cusine with a blend of Louisiana Cajun and tropical flare.

Open 5-10 pm. Music nightly. 760 S. Kihei Rd, Kihei 874-8385. $$ K

UPCOUNTRY Anthony’s Coffee Company - A full espresso bar, hot and cold sandwiches and ice cream. Stop in for a great box lunch! 90 Hana Hwy, Paia, 579-8340. $ Aha’Aina - Ocean front dinning featuring a delicious chili pork burrito and a large variety of omelets, island fish and chicken katsu. Open for breakfast and lunch only. Tues - Sat 7a.m. - 2 p.m. Sun 7 a.m. -1 p.m. 7 Aewa Place, Pukalani, 572-2395. $$ Café 808 - Local diner serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Open daily from 6 a.m. to 8 p.m. 4566 Lower Kula Rd., Kula, 878-6874. $ Cafe O’Lei - Light and healthy yet hearty gourmet lunches with delicious salads and focaccia sandwiches. Makawao Paniolo Courtyard, 573-9065. $$ Café Des Amis - Charming cafe with delicious sweet and savory crepes and Mediterranean fare. 42 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-6323. $ Café Mambo - International bistro featuring Mediterranean and Mexican cuisine with Moorish influences. 30 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-8021. $ Cakewalk Paia Bakery - High quality baked goods, sandwiches and specialty cakes. 100 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-8770. $

Spago - Gourmet cuisine presented by world-famous chef-owner Wolfgang Puck. Oceanfront dining at its finest! Four Seasons Resort Wailea, 874-8000. $$$

Casanova - First class service and first class food.

Fine Italian dining at night and Makawao’s favorite deli by day. 1188 Makawao Ave., 572–0220. $$

Spices - Steak, seafood and more. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. The Maui Coast Hotel, 2259 S. Kihei Rd., 891-8860. $$$

Charley’s Restaurant & Saloon - Hankering for some grub? Charley’s serves it hearty and healthy from breakfast to dinner and beyond. 142 Hana Hwy., Pa`ia, 579–9453. $ K

Stella Blues Cafe - Healthy, quality food in a casual, homestyle setting. Breakfast, lunch and dinner with daily specials. 1279 S. Kihei Rd., 874-3779. $$ South Shore Tiki Lounge - Killer burgers, sausage

Colleen’s - 1940’s style urban bistro serving breakfast, lunch and dinner from 6 a.m. to 9:30 p.m. daily.

Haiku Cannery, 575-9211. $$

$

2 0 0 OFF

A N Y POUND OF REGULAR PRICED COFFEE with this coupon. expires 2/17/05

4 4 4 H a n a H w y. K a h u l u i Corn e r o f Dairy R d . & H a n a H w y.

87 7–CUPS

WWW. H AWAIIANCOFFEE.COM

DININGLISTINGS PRICE GUIDE

$→$10-$20

$$→$20-$40

Fresh Mint - Vietnamese vegetarian cuisine including summer rolls, spicy lemongrass soup and soy fish in clay pot. Open daily 11 a.m. to 9 p.m. Catering and take-out available. 115 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9144. $

$$$→$40 and up

K→Kama’aina Discount

Milagros Food Co. - South American cuisine with an island influence. Best people watching spot in Pa`ia! Extensive tequila menu and delicious daily special. 3 Baldwin St., Paia, 579–8755. $ Moana Bakery & Cafe - Pacific Rim dining for vegetarians and meat eaters. Bakery provides wonderful goodies for the sweet tooth. 71 Baldwin Ave., Pa`ia, 579–9999. $

Hali`imaile General Store - Gourmet dining in a charming atmosphere with food from Chef Beverly Gannon’s award-winning menu. 900 Hali`imaile Rd, 572–2666. $ Hana Hou Cafe - Hawaiian homestyle cooking with aloha-filled ambience and local musicians.

810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery, 575-2661. $

Pa`ia Fish Market - By serving fresh local Hawaiian fish daily, they are the hot spot for seafood lovers without the upscale pocket. 2A Baldwin Ave., Pa`ia, 579–8030. $

Island Tacos - Taco stand with fresh, made-toorder fish, beef and chicken tacos. Daily from 11 a.m.-4 p.m. 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery. $

Pauwela Cafe & Bakery - Healthy, low fat deli cuisine and daily fresh baked goods. Open 7 a.m.- 2:30 p.m. 375 West Kuiaha Road Unit 37 Haiku. 575-9242 $

Jacque’s Northshore Bistro - Tropical yet festive atmosphere, with a sushi bar, indoor and lanai dining. 120 Hana Hwy, Pa`ia, 579–8844. $$

Polli’s Mexican Restaurant - Paniolo country’s premier Mexican cantina, with nachos, burritos, ensaladas and more! 1202 Makawao Ave., 572-7808. $

Jameson’s Grill & Bar - Featuring fine steaks, fresh local fish and seafood and, of course, baked artichoke. 200 Kapalua Dr., Kapalua, 669-5653. $$$

SandBar & Grill - Casual contemporary island cuisine, featuring salads, kiawe grilled burgers, sandwiches and lobster tacos. Full bar, happy hour everyday 4-6 p.m. Open daily from 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. 89 Hana Hwy., Paia, 579-8742. $

Kimura Saimin Shop - Casual atmosphere and a simple, affordable menu with fresh ingredients done right! 810 Haiku Rd., Haiku Cannery, 575-5228. $

Banyan Tree - “Eclectic Pacific cuisine with a Hawaiian twist.” Lodge atmosphere with ocean views. Ritz Carlton Kapalua, 669–6200. $$$ Basil Tomato’s Italian Grill - Specializing in Northern Italian cuisine. Come for the ambience, stay for the delightful dining experience. 2780 Kekaa Dr., Kaanapali, 662-3210. $$ BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria - Deep-dish specialty pizzas and homemade Pizookies with live music nightly.

Overlooking Lahaina Town with ocean view. 730 Front St., 661-0700. $ Blue Lagoon - Casual dining with local grinds and bar, surrounded by waterfalls and palm trees. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 661–8141. $ Breakwall Cafe - Serving breakfast, coffee, sandwiches, salads and smoothies. Open everyday 7 a.m.2 p.m. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-7220. $ Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. - Fine Southern foods, with “Forrest Gump” movie memorabilia and logo wear in a lively, casual atmosphere. 889 Front St., Lahaina, 661–3111. $$

Canoes - Casual yet elegant dining serving Polynesian style steaks and seafood. Check out the salad bar! Lunch 11 a.m.-2:30 p.m., dinner 5-9 p.m.

1450 Front St., Lahaina, 661–0937. $$ Captain Dave Fish & Chips - Classic baskets of fish and chips. Open daily. 126 Lahainaluna Rd., Lahaina, 667-6700. $ Castaway Cafe - Beachside, serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Soups, salads, pasta. Maui Kaanapali Villas & Resort, 661-9091. $ Cilantro - Fresh grilled island fish, tacos and burritos. Mexican food beyond the border. 170 Papalaua St., Lahaina, 667-5444. $

WEST MAUI A&J Kitchen, Deli & Bakery - Choose from American, Hawaiian, Korean and Chinese cuisines.

Bakery sells cakes and cookies. Lahaina Center, 667–0623. $

La Provence - French-style bistro and patisserie with lanai, serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Open Wed thru Sun, 8:30 a.m. to 9 p.m.

3158 Lower Kula Rd., 878-1313. $$

Alexander’s Fish & Chips - Seafood, chicken, ribs all deep fried tempura style or grilled. Great food at great prices. 840 Wainee St., Lahaina Square, 6679009. $

Livewire Cafe - Gourmet desserts, coffee drinks, smoothies. Open 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. Sun thru Thu; 6 a.m. to midnight Fri and Sat. 137 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-6009. $

Aloha Mixed Plate - Experience the traditional foods of the varied ethnic groups who call Hawaii home. 1285 Front St., Lahaina, 661-3322. $

Lynne’s Cafe - Affordable homestyle local food including breakfast, plate lunch, chow fun and more! Catering available. 810 Kokomo Rd., Haiku, 575-9363. $

Athens Greek Restaurant - Affordable and authentic gyros, shish kebab, falafel and more.

Ya’Sou! Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-4300. $

Makawao Steak House - Classic and comfortable menu with daily fish preparations and salad bar. 3612 Baldwin Ave., Makawao, 5728711. $$

The Bakery - Fresh baked breads, pastries, soup and sandwiches available. 991 Limahana Pl., Lahaina, 6679062. $

Mama’s Fish House - Fresh island fish with fresh local ingredients at “Maui’s favorite restaurant.” 799 Poho Pl., Kuau, 579–8448. $$$

Ba-Le - French Vietnamese sandwiches, noodle dishes, pho, saimin and more. Wide variety of tapioca.

Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-5566. $

Maui’s Best Tamales & Local Food Authentic, fresh and tasty Mexican cuisine along with local favorites. 81 Makawao Ave., Pukalani Square, 573-2998. $

Bamboo Bar & Grill - Vietnamese, Thai and Japanese sushi. Delivery available, great daily specials.

Open late with full bar and pool tables. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 667-4051. $ K

KAMA’AINA & SEAFOOD

SPECIALS ALL WEEK LONG NIGHTLY SPECIALS

MON-1-1/4 LB LIVE MAINE LOBSTER $18.95 TUES-KAMA’AINA 50% OFF DINNER ENTREES WED-1LB. ALASKAN KING CRAB LEGS $19.95 THUR-14OZ PRIME RIB $16.95 FRI-KAMA’AINA 50% OFF DINNER ENTREES Kama’aina valid w/ HI ID & 17% Gratuity prior to Discount

Burritos! Nachos! Salsa Bar!

Island Fish Tacos Grilled Steak, Chicken Vegetarian 95 Nothing Over $6.

MAUI Lahaina Square, Lahaina • 661-8883 Kamaole Beach Center, Kihei • 879-5005 Napili Plaza, Napili • 665-0222 Kaahumanu Center, Kahului • 871-7726 BIG ISLAND Prince Kuhio Plaza, Hilo • 959-0359 OAHU Mililani Shopping Center, Mililani • 623-9405 Kailua Village Shops, Kailua • 261-4155

HAPPY HOUR DAILY 3-6

www.mauitacoscookbook.com Email: eatmaui@maui.net www.mauitacos.com

$3.00 TROPICALS / WELLS $3.25 BUD-BUD LIGHT-COORS LIGHT $1.00 FRESH OYSTER SHOOTERS DOLLAR DOUBLE ALL DAY

COVER STORY

Cafe Sauvage - Gourmet, hearty, satisfying fare in an unpretentious setting. Extensive beer and wine menu, after-dinner cordials and desserts! 844 Front St., Lahaina, 661–7600. $$ K

Veg Out - Vegan and vegetarian food, with Mexican, Italian and far east influences. 810 Kokomo Rd., Haiku, 575-5320. $

Kula Lodge & Restaurant - Upcountry’s family-style restaurant with sweeping views of the island. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Haleakala Highway, 878-1535. $

NEWS

Cafe O’Lei - Oceanfront dining featuring light and healthy yet hearty gourmet lunch and dinner. Delicious salads and Focaccia sandwiches. 839 Front St., Lahaina, 661–9491. $$

Vasi Gourmet - The best cakes and patries around, along with delicious salads, quiches and Gyro’s with a variety of teas. open 7 a.m.-8 p.m. 810 Kokomo Road, Haiku Market Place. 575-9588. $

Kitada’s - Saimin for breakfast is a standard.

Teriyaki beef, hamburger steak, tofu and teriyaki all available. 3617 Baldwin Ave., Makawao, 572–7241. $

LETTERS

Dollar amounts are based on dinner for two, not including beverages, tax & tip.

SURF

DINING

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A&E

FILM

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THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 27, 2005

15

DININGLISTINGS PRICE GUIDE

$→$10-$20

Chez Paul Restaurant - Fine dining.

Romantic, French cuisine for dinner only. Call for reservations. 820 Olowalu Rd., Olowalu, 6613843. $$$ K China Boat - The best Mandarin Szechwan cuisine on Maui. Open for lunch and dinner.

4474 L. Honoapiilani Road, Kahana Gateway Shopping Center, 669-5089. $ CJ’s Deli & Diner - Reasonably priced comfort foods like Reuben sandwiches, pot roast, freshly baked pies and more. Open daily. 2580 Kekaa Dr., Fairway Shops, Kaanapali, 667-0968. $ Coconut Grove - Steak, seafood and other island favorites. Next to Lahaina Cannery Mall.

Open 5:30-9 p.m. 1312 Front Street, Lahaina, 661-5648.

Compadres Bar & Grill - Western cooking with a Mexican accent. Oceanview dining and Margarita bar. Serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. Lahaina Cannery Mall, 661-7189. $ Cool Cat Cafe - ‘50s-style diner with lanai.

Delicious burgers and sandwiches, huge salads and fountain desserts. Lahaina Wharf Center, 667-0908. $ K Curry- In-A-Hurry - Curry dishes that are delightful and delicious in alternative vegetarian eating. Open Tu-Sa. 11:30am-7:30pm. 840 Wahinee St. Lahaina Square. 661-4370. $ David Paul’s Lahaina Grill - Fine Pacific Rim cuisine in the intimate dining room of the Lahaina Inn. 127 Lahainaluna, Lahaina, 667–5117. $$$ K Dollie’s Pub & Cafe - Pizza, sandwiches, salads and full bar. Open daily 11 a.m. to midnight.

4310 L. Honoapiilani Hwy., Kahana Manor Shops, 669-0266. $ Erik’s Seafood & Sushi - Fresh seafood, sushi and great steamers. Open nightly with live entertainment. Half off sushi Sundays. 843 Wainee St., Lahaina, 662-8780. $$ Feast At Lele - A royal tour of Polynesian cuisine with music and dance from four Pacific islands. 505 Front Street, Lahaina, 667-5353. $$$ Fish & Game Brewing Co. & Rotisserie Maui’s own restaurant/brewery, with a rotisserie grill featuring steak, seafood and ambience.

Also, late-night menu served until 1:30 a.m.

4405 Honoapiilani Hwy., Kahana, 669-3474. $$ Gaby’s Pizzeria - Casual Italian dining with pizza and pasta from $6-$25. Open 11 a.m. to 12 a.m. daily. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8112. $ Gazebo Restaurant - Full breakfast and lunch menu, casual atmosphere and beautiful oceanside setting. 5315 Lower Honoapiilani Rd, Napili, 669-5621. $ Gerard’s - Fine French dining in downtown Lahaina. Rich and flavorful yet light foods await

$

$$→$20-$40

$$$→$40 and up

K→Kama’aina Discount

your taste buds. 174 Lahainaluna, Lahaina, 661–8939. $$$ Giovani’s Tomato Pie Ristorante - Fine Italian dining located. Open for dinner. 2291 Kaanapali Prkwy, 661-3160. $$ Hard Rock Cafe - Good American food at decent prices, served alongside rock ‘n roll memorabilia. 900 Front St., Lahaina, 667–7400. $ Hawaiian Village Coffee - Old-Hawaiian styled coffeehouse with pastries, smoothies, salads, sandwiches and quiche Open 5:30 a.m. to 6 p.m. daily.

4405 Honoapiilani Hwy. Kahana Gateway Shopping Center, 665-1114. $ Hecocks - Restaurant and cocktail lounge oceanside.

Breakfast, lunch and dinner. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8810. $$ K House of Saimin - Ono homemade saimin, chicken sticks, and Haupia pie are just some of the local favorites here. Old Lahaina Center, 667–7572. $ Hula Grill - Barefoot bar and beachside dining, 1940s style. Menu is a seafood lovers delight. Whaler’s Village, Kaanapali, 667–6636. $$ i`o - Pacific Rim cuisine with awesome sunset views from indoor or outdoor dining. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 661–8422. $$$ Island Tacos - The best soft shell tacos ever. Choice of beef, fish, pork or chicken. Served with black beans, fresh cabbage, cheese. onions and jalapenos. Open Late night. 744 Luakini St. Lahaina $ Java Jazz/Soup Nutz - Coffee bar and cafe with great food, eclectic atmosphere and lounge ambience.

Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. 3350 Lower Honoapiilani Rd., Honokowai, 667-0787. $ Jonny’s Burger Joint - Great burgers, Mexican food, salads and fried items, served until midnight with bar and pool table. 2395 Honoapiilani Hwy, Kaanapali, 661-4500. $

Livewire Cafe - Gourmet desserts, coffee drinks, smoothies. Open 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. Mon-Sun 612 Front St. Lahaina 661-4213. $ Longhi’s - Elegant fine dining using the freshest ingredients. Pasta, seafood and steaks. 888 Front St., Lahaina, 667–2288. $$$ Ma La - Organic whole grains cusine with clams, lobster soup, chicken tikka and beet & goat cheese salads.Ocean front dining and full bar. 1307 Front Street, Lahaina, 667-9394. $$ Mama’s Ribs & Rotisserie - Serving ribs and roasted chicken, BBQ baked beans, coleslaw and macaroni salad. Napili Plaza, 665–6262. $ Mango Cafe - Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

American cusine, with local favorites. Full bar Nightly specials. 7:30 am - 10 pm. 2290 Kaanapali Parkway, 667-1929. $$ K Maui Tacos - Featuring tacos and burritos with chargrilled steak, chicken and seafood marinated in juices and spices from the Islands. 840 Wainee Street 6618883 Lahaina (and Napili) 5095 Napilihau. $ Moose McGillycuddy’s - Great values, large portions, all you can eat specials, a merry atmosphere and a large bar. 844 Front St., Lahaina, 667–7758. $ Mr. Sub Sandwiches - Speciality sandwiches made to order with salads and homemade soups. 129 Lahainaluna Rd., Lahaina, 667-5683. $

Nalu Sunset Bar & Sushi - Sushi rolls, sashimi, various Japanese appetizers, sandwiches and more.

Maui Marriott, Kaanapali, 667–1200 ext. 51. $$ Okazuya Deli - Quality Japanese plate lunch. The best lemon caper mahi mahi and Okinawan potato tempura ever! Open 10 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. and 4:30 to

Kimo’s - Fresh fish, prime rib and their famous Hula Pie. Oceanside dining and live entertainment daily. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661–4811. $$

Lahaina Coolers - Off the beaten path surf bistro.

Good food and a quality, late night menu. 180 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 661–7082. $ Lahaina Fish Co. - Chef’s signature Pacific Rim specialties prepared with fresh island fish. Dine on the oceanside lanai. 831 Front St., Lahaina, 661–3472. $$ Leilani’s On The Beach - Relaxed beachfront dining, specializing in fresh seafood and Pacific Rim cuisine. 2435 Kaanapali Parkway, 661-4495. $$

of equal or lesser value (Saturday Nights, Dinner only • With this coupon Exp. 2/28/05)

Ashley’s Cafe 362 Hukulii Pl., Kihei (Behind Tesoro Gas Station on Piilani Hwy.)

874-8600

.00

2 OFF ANY PIZZA PIE!

•OFFER EXPIRES 2/28/05 •NOT VALID WITH OTHER OFFERS •MUST PRESENT COUPON

Indoor & Outdoor Dining BOTH with a Great View of the Game

PIZZA • CALZONES HOT & COLD HEROS Phone:

661-6773

Fax:

667-1922

Located in Lahaina Square • Next to Ace Hardware

DELIVERY • 7 DAYS • 11am to 10pm 16

JANUARY 27, 2005

DINING

WEEK A S T O L D T O S A R A H E LW E L L

Kara Cassetti Line Cook, Milagros in Paia

Nachos Grande - Fresh Mexican food served fast.

Vegetarian, too. Honokowai Marketplace, 662–0890. $

Kahuna Kabob - Healthy food at low prices! Soups, brown rice, veggies and kabobs And they deliver.

Lahaina Marketplace, 661–9999. $ K

Kobe - Japanese Steak House and Oku’s Sushi Bar, featuring teppanyaki cooking and fabulous sushi.

Dinner nightly from 5:30-10 p.m., Sushi 5:30-11:30 p.m. 136 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 667-5555. $$

EMPLOYEE OF THE

874-TACOS

1279 S. Kihei Rd. (Next to Bank of Hawaii) Azeka Mauka

BUY 1 ENTREE GET SECOND ENTREE

HALF PRICE! Must present coupon. Not good with other offers.

Good from 3-9pm. Expires 2/28/05

I like to think of each plate I prepare as a work of art. I like to be creative and use a lot of color when I garnish the plates with things like sour cream, cilantro and special sauces. I also like to personalize plate presentations for special requests or favorite regular customer. One of my favorite special dishes to prepare is a seafood enchilada with ahi, shrimp, crab and scallops topped off with a creamy verde sauce.

I like the colors on our most popular dish, ahi spinach salad. It has beautiful reds and greens and comes garnished with papaya seed dressing. We also have a really good tiger shrimp pupu and like to use a fried tortilla shell that stand up in the presentation. We always have different dinner specials where we use extra time and special ingredients in the preparation.

I started working at Milagros about a year and a half ago. I was working as a dishwasher for about a month when a line cook position became available. I had no cooking experience before I started working at Milagros, but I was interested in learning how to cook and they said they would teach me. Since then, I’ve been learning more about cooking every day and I love it.

I love the people I work with and the locals that eat at the restaurant. There is a good vibe here. I’ve lived in a lot of places like South Dakota, Colorado, Miami and Humbolt, where I worked as a Barista before I moved to Maui. I usually like to move to different places and go where my heart takes me but I think I will stay on Maui for a long time.

We serve both breakfast and lunch but my shift usually begins around three so I can set up for dinner, which starts at 5:30. We have to take time to put away things like sandwich prep items from lunch and restock fresh supplies for the dinner crowd. We use a lot of special sauces during dinner for our entrees and pupus that we don’t use during lunch. MTW

DININGLISTINGS 9 p.m. 3600 Lower Honokowai, 665-0512. $

Honoapiilani

Hwy.,

Ono’s Surf Bar & Grill - Casual poolside dining. Now featuring reasonably priced tapasHawiian style menu.for supper and late night dining. 6:30 am-10pm.The Westin Maui, Ka’anapali, 667-2525. $ Outback Steak House - Quality steaks, shrimp-on-the-barbie, and the Bloomin’ Onion in a casual and lively atmosphere. 4405 Honoapiilani Hwy, Kahana, 665-1822. $$

Sansei Seafood Restaurant and Sushi Bar D.K. Kodama has combined the highest quality sushi bar infused with Hawaii’s cultural flavors. 115 Bay Drive, Kapalua, 669–6286. $$ K Sea House Restaurant - Looks out over incredible Napili Bay. Dining here is an amazing experience under the direction of Chef Michael Gallagher. 5900 Lwr. Honoapi`ilani Hwy., Napili, 669–1500. $$ Smoke House - Delicious barbeque, ribs, chicken, sandwiches and hamburgers. Full bar. Open 11:30 a.m. - 10 p.m. 927 Wainee St. Lahaina, 667-7005. $

Pacific’O - Elegant oceanfront award-winning contemporary Pacific cuisine. Live jazz on weekends. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 667-4341. $$$

Spats Trattoria - Step into old Northern Italy. Tables are private and the Antipasto serves two. Hyatt Regency, Kaanapali, 667–4727. $$$

Penne Pasta - Mark Ellman’s inexpensive Italian bistro with homestyle pasta, pizzas and salads. 180 Dickenson St., Lahaina, 661–6633. $

Sports Club Kahana Grill - Upscale, healthy restaurant inside Sports Club Kahana. Breakfast, lunch and take-out. 4327 Lwr. Honoapi`ilani Rd., Kahana, 669-3539. $$

Pho Saigon 808 - Vietnamese cuisine, Saigon steaks and vegetarian delight. Open 7 days a week. 658 Front St., Wharf Cinema Center, 6616628. $ Pioneer Inn - Breakfast, lunch and dinner daily, with live entertainment nightly. 659 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-3636. $ Pad Thai - Delicious Påd Thai, among many other items. Open daily. 658 Front St., Lahaina, $ Pizza Paradiso - Award-winning pasta dishes, toss-to-order salads, big fat Greek gyros, homemade tiramisu and panna cotta. Honokowai Marketplace, 667-2929; $ Plantation House Restaurant - HawaiianMediterranean cuisine. Breakfast, lunch and dinner daily. 2000 Plantation Club Dr., Kapalua, 6696299. $ Reilley’s - Known for their choice award-winning beef. Gourmet steaks and seafood. Open at 5:30 pm 4405 Honoapi`ilani Hwy, Ste #304 Kahana, 667-7477 $$$ Roy’s Bar & Grill - This fine dinning restaurant serves mouth-watering Hawaiian fusion entrees in a spacious upbeat atmosphere. Open nightly from 5:30p.m.- 10p.m.4405 Honoapi’ilani Hwy. Kahana 669-6999. $$$ Rusty Harpoon Restaurant and Tavern Quench thirst, satiate hunger and watch sports.

Large parties welcome. Whalers Village, Kaanapali, 661–3123. $$ Ruth’s Chris Steak House - USDA prime steak and fine wines. Dinner served nightly. 5 p.m. - 10 p.m. 900 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8815. $$$

Sunrise Cafe - Casual and cozy outdoor lanai, serving American food from 6 a.m. to 4 p.m. daily. 693 Front St., Lahaina, 661-8558. $ Swan Court - One of the top 10 romantic restaurants in the world, with an extensive list of contemporary fine wines. Hyatt Regency, Kaanapali, 667–4727. $$$ Take Sushi - Open late night for late night sushi lovers. Full menu and daily special. 505 Front St., Lahaina, 667-4051. $ Terrace Restaurant - Open from 6:30-11 a.m. serving breakfast only. Elegant dining, buffet-style rotating menu ranging from “Breakfast on the Farm” to “Hawaiian Plantation-Style Breakfast.” Ritz Carlton, Kapalua, 669-6200. $$$ Thai Chef - Thai food like you’ve never had it, with curry, Pad Thai, summer rolls and more. Old Lahaina Center, 667–2814. $ Tropica - Oceanfront dining on Ka’anapali Beach, featuring steaks and fresh fish prepared in a variety of styles. Specialty entrees, appetizers and desserts.

5:30-9:30pm. Westin, Kaanapali, 667–2525. $$ Vino - Comfort and contemporary cuisine featuring fresh pasta and an extensive wine list. Open for dinner nightly from 5:30 p.m. Village Course Clubhouse, Kapalua, 661-8466. $$$ Vinny’s Pizza - Authentic New York style pizza, calzones and subs. Open 7 Days. Delivery 11 a.m. - 10 p.m. 840 Wainee St. Lahaina Square, Lahaina. 6616773.$

Not to be used with any other coupons or discounts. Coupon has no cash value.

Coupon expires 2-28-05

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JANUARY 27, 2005

17

FRIDAY JANUARY 28TH 891-MEXI

FLAVA TEA ZONE

LADIES NIGHT OUT! with Curtis Williams & Hip Pocket

18

JANUARY 27, 2005

DJ ROB SWIFT & DV ONE

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE SEXIEST DANCE PARTY ON MAUI!

HIP HOP HOUSE R&B OLD SCHOOL IN THE MIX

ULTRA FAB ALOHA NIGHT! TUESDAYS SIN $2 DRINKS

DANCE

WITH

4pm-close

All Domestic Beers & Wells 4-5pm $2 Drinks 5-6pm $3 Drinks 6-7pm $4 Drinks

Grammy Nominee

Willie K

FAT JOE

until Midnight! w/ DJ Fat Joe

Jody Watley!

Thursday-Friday, 9 p.m. at Paradice Bluz [MUSIC] I remember when “I’m Looking for a New Love” came out in the late ‘80s.

Actually, the video was on MTV a lot. I thought Jody Watley was such a hot chick with great style—she made me want to wear those big hoop earrings and the leggings under short skirts all the time! Anyway, since releasing her debut album that went platinum in 1988, Watley was awarded Best New Artist at the Grammys, was called one of the most beautiful women in the world by People magazine and came out with a string of sassy club hits—“Some Kind of Lover,” “Still a Thrill,” “Real Love,” “Friends”—earning her the title of Dance Diva. Plus, she did cool, weird stuff, like putting out a fitness video called “Dance to Fitness,” dating John Taylor of Duran Duran, playing Rizzo in Grease on Broadway, performing at the White House and contributing on that Bob Geldof Feed the World project/Band-Aid song “Do They Know It’s Christmas?” Oh yeah, and her birthday is on Sunday! Tickets are $20 in advance, $25 at the door. Call 667-5299. [SAMANTHA CAMPOS]

SEND YOUR LISTINGS & PHOTOS FOR DA KINE CALENDAR TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM OR FAX (808) 661-0446 LETTERS

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JANUARY 27, 2005

19

ThIS WEEK’S PICKS

by Samantha Campos

Free Sewer Tour!

Tattoos!

Saturday, 9:45 a.m.; 11:15 a.m. and 12:45 p.m. at the Kihei Wastewater Reclamation Facility

Saturday, 7 p.m. at Life’s a Beach

“Ever wondered what happens to the dirty water that goes down the drain?” asked the press release for this “open house.” “Here is your chance to find out!” And what things you’ll find out! Like treatment processes and R-1 tertiary recycled water! And all tours are completely free and open to the public! Just remember to wear shoes. Trust us—you gotta wear shoes to this one. If you can’t figure out why, then you probably aren’t the kind of person who’d enjoy touring a wastewater reclamation facility. Anyway, the facility is located at 480 Welahahao Rd., which is south of the Elleair Maui Golf Club and mauka of Pi’ilani Highway in Kihei. For more information, call 270-7426. [ANTHONY PIGNATARO]

[ART/MUSIC] It’ll be a bevy of beauties with inked flesh!

There’s a competition and prizes with some of Maui’s best body artists from Evolved Art, Hot Rod Ink, Sacred Center Tattoo, Island Ink and Maui Tattoo Co. Live music by Prankster. Call 891-8010.

THURSDAY

20

JANUARY 27, 2005

➤➤➤➤➤FRIDAY ➤➤➤➤➤SATURDAY ➤➤➤➤➤SUN

DA KINE CALENDAR

Music, Music, Music!

Ladysmith Black Mambazo!

Saturday, 9 p.m. at the SandBar

Tuesday, 7 p.m. at the Castle Theater

[MUSIC] Not just one but three great bands for your listening pleasure! From reggae to rock, country to metal, The John Moore Project, The Easy (pictured left) and Khrinj have got it all dialed. Cover is $10. For info, call 579-8742.

[MUSIC] As part of the MACC’s Global Rhythms Series, the 10member South African a cappella group Ladysmith Black Mambazo and Vusi Mahlasela (pictured left) grace Maui with their inspirational songs of love, hope and peace. Tickets: $28, $18, $10 and kids get half-price! Call the box office at 242-7469.

Manic Monday!

Monday, 9 p.m. at Paradice Bluz [MUSIC] Well, it’s about time! Eighties Night! Finally, we get to hear all those hits that take us back to junior high dances and really bitchin’ hair, like “99 Luftballoons,” “Kids in America,” “(Keep Feeling) Fascination” and “Tainted Love!”

Hits from bands like Kajagoogoo, Human League, Frankie Goes to Hollywood and Duran Duran! Ohmigod ohmigod! Like, what am I going to wear?! $5 cover.

For info, call 667-5299.

DAY

➤➤➤➤➤MONDAY ➤➤➤➤➤TUESDAY ➤➤➤➤➤WEDNESDAY

IN

THE

H EART

OF

O LDE M AKAWAO T OWN

Wild Wahine Wednesday with dj blast

C ASANOVA ’ S F AMOUS L ADIES N IGHT !

T E T E C T A HE

VENING

HAT

ARNED

ASANOVA

HE

“ B E S T L AT E N IGHT I N M A U I ”

WA R D

MUSIC STARTS @ 9:45PM • $5 COVER

TH

TH

RY 29 SAT JANUA

Y 28 FRI JANUAR

E R I U Q S E E C N I V & HIS BAnNsaDtion

.

C .

Y .

N M A H A R DJ ALEXwithGspecial guest DJ’s ”V” DURTY, daeenpdteEkDand break beats

Maui’s guitar se G ROCK MMIN BLUES AND JARTS @ 9:45PM

ouse progressive h USIC STARTS @ 9:45PM M

MUSIC STA $8.00 COVER

R $10.00 COVE

Make it a Memorable Evening • Dine and Dance at Casanova For dinner reservations call 572–0220 • Log on at casanovamaui.com LETTERS

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JANUARY 27, 2005

21

FILMCRITIQUE

BY COLE SMITHEY

Spacey Sings Darin Kevin Spacey’s serenade reveals a shared duality serviceable portrayal of Cole Porter in the The short life of singer Bobby Darin is recent De Lovely. Both Spacey and Darin colorfully illustrated in Kevin Spacey’s changed their names at the start of their affectionate biopic about the crooner who careers—Spacey from Fowler, and Darin from made “Splish Splash” a hit before finding Cassotto. But more significantly, Spacey pop immortality with his version of “Mack shares with the late Darin a brittle yet genteel The Knife.” Although arguably too old for performance mask that the part—Spacey is serves to shield his 45, eight years emotional metabolism older than Darin from the brutal realiwhen he died— ties around him.

Spacey still manRated PG-13/114 mins.

It would be too easy ages to nail Darin’s to pick apart Beyond The Sea as a conventionvocal phrasing and body language perfectal formulaic biopic that crumbles in the third ly throughout the film’s many musical set act. The film is too much of a reflection of pieces. In fact, Spacey himself sings the Spacey’s internal passion for that kind of dissongs that made Darin famous in the missive response to be appropriate.

1950s and ‘60s.

Here is a guy who, regardless of the long list Close in execution to the recent Cole of marginal films he’s made over the last few Porter biopic De Lovely, Beyond The Sea years—like K-Pax and The Shipping News— faithfully pivots off episodes in Darin’s life has won two Oscars (Best Supporting Actor for to pack the screen with full-blown chorus The Usual Suspects and Best Actor for filled renditions of songs. More than 10 American Beauty). In this context Beyond The years in the making, the movie includes a Sea takes on significance as a double identity superb Kate Bosworth as Darin’s charmthat Kevin Spacey has been harboring in hopes ing wife Sandra Dee. of setting free a dream that should logically Beyond The Sea is a love song from catapult him forward as an actor.

Spacey to audiences familiar with Bobby In Darin’s life, he went from being a diligent Darin. That’s not to say that it’s not an child committed to being an entertainer to a entertaining film for people who’ve never hugely successful singer and actor with a heard the song “Dream Lover,” but that beautiful Hollywood wife—Gidget’s Sandra Spacey seems primarily concerned with Dee—to being an outcast of the entertainment telling Darin’s story to address burning system that he committed his life to. But he questions about how Bobby Darin lived still returned one last time before he died to and died at the young age of 37 due to give a grand performance of the popular songs heart failure. that gave him a charmed existence. For Spacey Spacey and Darin share certain stylistic to have so thoroughly digested Darin’s work and personal propinquity that point out that he was capable of taking a 17-piece band Spacey’s passion for his subject matter on a 12-city tour to perform Bobby Darin that goes beyond, let’s say, Kevin Kline’s

Beyond The Sea

★★★★★

Spacey serenading Darin songs is a testament to his rare level of reverence and dedication.

Beyond The Sea is a once-in-a-lifetime performance purge for Spacey that consequently shows the actor at his best. Personally, I’ve never been a big Spacey fan. K-Pax was a shameless rip off of a rarely seen Argentine film Man Facing Southeast—by director

Eliseo Subiela. The Shipping News was a profoundly uninspired performance.

But there is something crucial and mercurial in Spacey’s identity that beckons back to a specific ethic of integrity and hard won charisma that somehow catches every light in the room. In this case those bright lights shine on Bobby Darin. MTW

HOLOHOLO

GIRL

®

ACADEMY AWARD NOMINEE “THE BEST PICTURE OF THE YEAR!” Richard Corliss, TIME MAGAZINE • Jami Bernard, NEW YORK DAILY NEWS

GROUNDHOG HEAVEN

HOUSE OF FLYING DAGGERS A Zhang Yimou Film

EXCLUSIVE ENGAGEMENT

NOW PLAYING! W MAUI MALL MEGAPLEX WALLACE

View the trailer at www.houseofflyingdaggersmovie.com

22

JANUARY 27, 2005

FILM

CHECK THEATRE DIRECTORIES OR CALL FOR SHOWTIMES

SHOWTIMES

MOVIECAPSULES

MAUI FILM FESTIVAL

MAUI FILM FESTIVAL’S CANDLELIGHT CINEMA

Castle Theater, 572-3456 Indigo - Unrated - Sat & Sun 1, 3 Easy - R - Wed 5, 7:30

Saturday, January 29 & Sunday, January 30

MAUI MALL MEGAPLEX

Indigo 1 & 3 p.m., McCoy Studio Theater A film about redemption, grace and the healing powers of a new generation of psychic and gifted "Indigo" children, starring Neale Donald Walsch (author of the Conversations with God series), screen written by James Twyman (of the Beloved Community) and, in his directorial debut, directed

by Stephen Simon (producer of What Dreams May Come). Unrated. 90 min.

Wednesday, February 2 Easy 5 & 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater This Sundance Film Festival Grand Jury Prize nominee finds the incandescently radiant newcomer Marguerite Moreau, playing an acupuncture enthusiast, in a sensually and sexually satisfying love triangle struggling to make the right choice between two seemingly decent men.

Variety called this dramedy "A hip look at sexuality... smart and funny with unexpected twists" that "ends on exactly the right note" (NY Daily News).

"Captures the brave messiness of single life and 20-something dating. The sex scenes have a rare feel of authenticity." (NY Times). Rated R. 99 min.

New This Week ALONE IN THE DARK – (R) – Action/Adventure, Suspense/Horror and Thriller – A detective of the paranormal, hot on the trail of the mysterious death of a friend, discovers that “evil demons worshiped by the ancient Abskani culture are planning on coming back to life in the 21st century to once again take over the world.”

Aw, sounds like a bad case of food poisoning to me. Just sleep it off, buddy. You’ll be all right.

HIDE AND SEEK – (R) – Thriller – Not to be confused with the 1999 film of the same name starring Daryl Hannah and Vincent Gallo, or the 1980 flick about Israel or even the 1977 War Games clone, this is a Robert DeNiro horror film about how his young daughter’s imaginary friend is actually real.

MILLION DOLLAR BABY – (PG 13) – Romantic Drama – This Oscar-nominated film is getting rave reviews, but it’s really just another cliché-filled picture about a young boxer who’s had a tough life but, through sheer force of will, fights the good fight. Stars Hillary Swank, Morgan Freeman and Clint Eastwood, who also directed it.

SIDEWAYS – (R) – Comedy and Drama – This could be your typical road-tripping buddy flick, only the “buddies” in question are Miles (Paul Giamatti)—a down-and-out failed novelist, middle school teacher and bitter divorcee but apt wine connoisseur—and his happy-go-lucky friend Jack (Thomas Hayden Church), who has his own devious agenda for their big “wine tasting trip” before he gets married the following weekend.

Also stars Virginia Madsen and Sandra Oh.

Now Showing ARE WE THERE YET? – (PG) – Romantic Comedy – Ice Cube stars in this light-hearted look at how a swinging bachelor takes his girlfriend’s kids on a road trip to impress her, but finds that they really only want to turn his life into a living hell. How do they come up with this stuff?

ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13 – (R) – Action/Adventure/Crime/Gangster – This is a remake of John Carpenter’s second film, and hits all the usual shoot-‘em-up notes: deranged gang bent on springing an incarcerated mobster lays siege to an undermanned police station. Ethan Hawke plays the cop in charge who ends up arming Lawrence Fishburne and the other jailbirds to defend the station.

THE AVIATOR – (PG13) – Drama – This is Martin Scorsese’s 168-minute epic on Howard Hughes that includes only a brief interlude of the billionaire’s most intriguing years when he became renowned for living in secret while wearing tissue boxes on his feet and growing out his hair and fingernails to absurd lengths, all while keeping jars of his own urine close by. Stars

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No, honey—the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy ARE real. Drinkable tap water? Um...

Leonardo di Caprio as the nutty flyer/film maker and No Doubt’s Gwen Stefani as Jean Harlow. Fabulous!

COACH CARTER – (PG13) – Drama – Inspired by true-life story of controversial high-school basketball coach Ken Carter, who received both high praise and staunch criticism when he made national news in 1999 for benching his entire undefeated basketball team for poor academic performance. Starring Samuel Jackson, Rob Brown, Ashanti Baby! Baby! Baby ! Baby!

CLOSER – (R) – Drama – Another of Jude Law’s many, many 2004 pictures. This one teams him and three others in a story of four strangers who have chance encounters and overlapping attractions.

Sounds hilarious. Also stars Julia Roberts, Natalie Portman and Clive Owen.

ELEKTRA – (PG13) – Action/Adventure – Jennifer Garner reprises her role as the hottie superhero assassin who nearly upstaged Ben Affleck’s Daredevil two years ago. Anyhoo, though she died in that flick, she was reborn for this one so she could kill some dude and his little girl for the super-assassin group Order of the Hand. Sweeeet. Also stars Goran Visnjic and Terence Stamp.

FAT ALBERT – (PG) – Comedy, Family – The latest in a series of live-action films patterned after cartoons that I grew up watching. No, it’s cool. Really, I don’t care. If Hollywood is totally bankrupt of ideas and is just recycling stuff that we all know and have seen, that’s there business. I mean, just because I write scripts that come back unopened, that doesn’t mean I’m bitter or anything.

FINDING NEVERLAND – (PG13) – Drama – Johnny Depp plays J. M. Barrie, the guy who wrote Peter Pan in this London, 1904 story. You remember Peter Pan, right? Sandy Duncan played him on Broadway. Also stars Kate Winslet and Dustin Hoffman.

HOUSE OF FLYING DAGGERS – (PG13) – Action/Adventure, Foreign – This movie takes place near the end of China’s Tang Dynasty, which was, well, a while ago. Anyway, two cops arrest this hot dancer who has underworld ties, then decide that she’s too hot to bring downtown so they escape with her on some kind of perilous journey. Cool.

IN GOOD COMPANY – (PG13) – Comedy, Drama – Poor sap Dan Foreman (Dennis Quaid) ends up demoted from head of ad sales and has to work for a new boss, Carter Duryea (Topher Grace), who is not only half his age, but also decides to date Foreman’s hottie 18-year-old daughter Alex (Scarlett Johansson). Those naughty up-and-comers!

LIFE AQUATIC WITH STEVE ZISSOU – (R) – Comedy – A decidedly quirky Wes Anderson flick about an internationally famous oceanographer (Bill Murray), who along with his possibly long lost son (Owen Wilson), takes his wingnut crew (headed by a brilliantly wussy Willem Dafoe) on an expedition to hunt down the elusive Jaguar Shark that killed his partner. Also along for the ride is a beautiful pregnant journalist (Cate Blanchett), the oceanographer’s estranged wife and benefactor (Anjelica Huston)—hellooo, sugar mama!—and some other such obstacles, like pirates, bankruptcy, kidnapping, insurance concerns and Jeff Goldblum.

MEET THE FOCKERS – (PG13) – Comedy – Four years ago, Greg Focker (Ben Stiller) met his fiance’s (Teri Polo) parents, including ex-CIA man Jack Byrnes (Robert De Niro) and his wife (Blythe Danner). This time, we meet The Fockers—a liberal stay-at-home dad (Dustin Hoffman) and his senior citizens’ sex therapist wife (Barbara Streisand). Usually, I’m skeptical about all-star casts but Bobby De Niro, Tootsie and

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

Babs? C’mon!

NATIONAL TREASURE – (PG) – Action/Adventure – Nicholas Cage and Diane Kruger star in this quest to find some incredible treasure hidden by our nation’s founding fathers, who were nice enough to plant clues on the back of $1 bills. Sean Bean, as usual, plays a “ruthless adversary” in their search to unlock the secret to what the movie calls a 2,000-year-old mystery. Sounds great—wait, 2,000? Um, isn’t the country just—wait, let me get my calculator—228 years old?

So it’s a 228-year-old mystery, right? Well, that doesn’t sound like such a big deal.

OCEAN’S TWELVE – (PG13) – Action/Adventure, Romance, Thriller, Crime – This is the heist caper that out-heists the previous heist caper Ocean’s Eleven, which in itself was a remake of the horrendously awful Rat Pack-starring Ocean’s 11. This time around, the band of cons and thieves gets together again to rip off someone really rich in Europe to pay off the Vegas casino guy they ripped off in the first movie. Stars George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Julia Roberts and all the rest.

PHANTOM OF THE OPERA – (PG13) – Drama, Musical, Suspense – It’s the classic tale—and another cinematic take on a Broadway musical, oh joy—about a mysterious masked figure who roams the undergrounds of 19th century Paris, especially lurking around (or under—naughty!) the Opera Populaire, where he tutors a beautiful young soprano.

RACING STRIPES – (PG13) – Comedy, Drama, Kids/Family – A traveling circus accidentally leaves behind a baby zebra—I know, it happens all the time— so then the precocious zebra gets the inclination to become a racetrack-star, with a little help from his farm animal friends... Okay, is it just me or does it sound like somebody had a few too many special brownies when they came up with this screenplay?

I’m just saying...

WHITE NOISE - (PG13) - Thriller - Jonathan Rivers (Michael Keaton) plays a man whose peaceful existence is shattered by the unexplained death of his wife Anna, and who is eventually contacted by a man claiming to be receiving messages from Anna through “household recording devices.” What the hell are “household recording devices?!”

Maui Mall, 249–2222 (Showtimes) = Matinee Alone in the Dark - R- Fr, M-W (12:45, 3, 5:15), 7:30, 9:45, Sa-Su (12:45, 3), 5:15, 7:30, 9:45 Are We There Yet? - PG - Th-Fr, M-W (12:30, 2:45, 5), 7:15, 9:30, Sa-Su (12:30, 2:45), 5, 7:15, 9:30 Assault on Precinct 13 - R - Th-Fr, M-W (1:10, 4:20), 7:20, 10, Sa-Su (1:10), 4:20, 7:20, 10 Elektra - PG13 - Th (12:45, 1:15, 3, 3:50, 5:20), 7, 7:40, 9:20, 10, Fr, M-W (12:45, 3, 5:20), 7:40, 10 Sa-Su (12:45, 3), 5:20, 7:40, 10 Finding Neverland - PG - Th-Fr, M-W (1:20, 4:10), 6:50, 9:15, Sa-Su (1:20), 4:10, 6:50, 9:15 House of Flying Daggers - PG13 - Th-Fr, M-W (1:30, 4:30), 7:10, 9:55, Sa-Su (1:30), 4:30, 7:10, 9:55 Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou - R - Th-Fr, M-W (1, 4), 7, 9:35, Sa-Su (1), 4, 7, 9:35 Ocean’s Twelve - PG13 - Th - (12:55, 3:55), 6:45, 9:30, Fr, M-W (12:50, 3:45), 6:45, 9:30 Sa-Su (12:50), 3:45, 6:45, 9:30 Phantom of the Opera - PG13 - Th-Fr, M-W (12:40, 3:40), 6:40, 9:40, Sa-Su (12:40), 3:40, 6:40, 9:40 Racing Stripes - PG - Th (12:30, 12:50, 2:50, 3:45, 5:10), Fr, M-W (12:30, 2:50, 5:10), 7:30, 9:50, Sa-Su (12:30, 2:50), 5:10, 7:30, 9:50 Sideways - R - Fr, M-W (12:55, 3:55), 6:55, 9:45, Sa-Su (12:55), 3:55, 6:55, 9:45 White Noise - PG13 - Th (12:35, 2:55, 5:15), 7:30, 9:45, Fr, M-W (12:35, 2:45, 5), 7:25, 9:45, Sa-Su (12:35, 2:45), 5, 7:25, 9:45

KA’AHUMANU 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center, 875-4910 Aviator - PG13 - Daily (12:45), 4:05, 7:35 Beyond the Sea - PG13 - Th only (1:30), 4:15, 7, 9:35 Coach Carter - PG13 - Daily (1), 4:15, 7:10, 10:05 Fat Albert - PG - Th only (12:45, 3) Hide and Seek - PG13 - Fr-W (12:30, 2:50), 5:10, 7:30, 9:55 In Good Company - PG13 - Daily (12:30), 4:30, 7:15, 9:50 Meet the Fockers - PG13 - Daily (1:15), 4:45, 7:20, 10 Million Dollar Baby - PG13 - Fr-W (1), 4:10, 7:05, 10 National Treasure - PG - Th only 7:05, 9:45

KUKUI MALL 1819 South Kihei Road, 875-4910 Coach Carter - PG13 - Th, Su-W (1), 4:15, 7, Fr-Sa (1), 4:15, 7, 9:40 Elektra - PG13 - Th only (1:45), 5, 7:45 Hide and Seek - R - Fr-Sa (1:45), 5, 7:45, 10, SuW (1:45), 5, 7:45 Meet the Fockers - PG - Th (1:15), 4:30, 7:15, FrSa (1:30), 4:45, 7:30, 9:50, Su-W (1:30), 4:45, 7:30 Racing Stripes - PG - Th only (1:30), 4:45, 7:30 Sideways - R - Fr-Sa (1:15), 4:30, 7:15, 9:50, Su-W (1:15), 4:30, 7:15

FRONT STREET THEATERS

8*

$

easy sex is. love isn’t.

"A hip look at sexuality… smart and funny with unexpected twists" -Va r i e t y

WED, FEB 2 *with MFF passport (5 films-$40)-single tickets Phone: 572-3456 www.mauifilmfestival.com

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

900 Front Street, 249–2222 Alone in the Dark - R - Fr, M-W (4:45), 7:30, 9:50, Sa-Su (1:45), 4:45, 7:30, 9:50 Assault on Precinct 13 - R - Th (4), 7, 9:30, Fr, MW 7:15, 9:45, Sa-Su 4:15, 7:15, 9:45 Elektra - PG13 - Th only (4:15), 7:15, 9:30 Hide and Seek - R - Fr, M-W (4:30), 7:30, 9:45, SaSu (1:30), 4:30, 7:30, 9:45 In Good Company - PG13 - Fr, M-W (4), 7, 9:30, Sa-Su (1), 4, 7, 9:30 Racing Stripes - PG - Th (4:30), 7, 9:15, Fr, M-W (4:15), Sa-Su (1:15) White Noise - PG13 - Th only (4:45), 7:30, 9:50

WHARF CINEMA CENTER 658 Front Street, 249–2222 Are We There Yet? - PG - Th-Fr, M-W (1:30, 4:15), 7:15, 9:30, Sa-Su (11:15, 1:30), 4:15, 7:15, 9:30 Coach Carter - PG - Th-Fr, M-W (1, 4), 7, 9:55, SaSu (1), 4, 7, 9:55 Meet the Fockers - PG13 - Th-Fr, M-W (1:45, 4:30), 7:30, 10, Sa-Su (11, 1:45), 4:30, 7:30, 10

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 27, 2005

23

Come Experience The Shops & Restaurants

PUREVOLUME

Rainy Day Music EVERYTHING BUT THE GIRL “LIKE THE DESERTS MISS THE RAIN” It’s not just the title that makes me think this is the perfect rainy day soundtrack. No, it probably has more to do with the fact that this CD was played in every locale I went to in cold, wet San Francisco last month.

Tracey Thorn’s ultra-smooth and silky vocals backed by chilled-out electronica and funky hand percussion made the city rain seem glamorous and contemplative. Whenever I play this CD now, I can almost hear the soft patter on the rooftop of my friends’ Victorian flat, and see the raindrops slide down the windowpane. — Warner Music Group 2002 [SAMANTHA CAMPOS]

BECK “SEA CHANGE”

• Bamboo Bar & Grill • Breakwall Cafe • The Feast at LeLe • Friends of Moku’ula • Gaby’s Pizzeria • Gallerie Hawaii • Goofy Foot Surf School • Hecocks Restaurant • I’O Restaurant • Lahaina Print Sellers • Lei Spa Maui • Maggie Coulombe • Maui To Go Arts & Crafts • Nancy Emerson School of Surfing • The Needlework Shop • Pacific’O Restaurant • Seaside Gems Maui • Whalers General Store

20+ Shops & Boutiques • 4 Oceanfront Restaurants • Polynesian Canoe Exhibits www.lahainashops.com • www.lahainarestaurants.com.

24

JANUARY 27, 2005

DAY&NIGHT

I love the rain. Mostly because it gives me an excuse to curl up with my blankie and a hot cup of cocoa while I read my favorite book. Beck’s latest release, Sea Change, is perfect for this type of scenario. While his lyrics about love, loss and feeling alone can be depressing, somehow the music’s lovely ambient soundscapes comfort me. Everybody knows Beck is a musical genius. But this CD isn’t like others you may have heard from him. It’s raw and woozy, trippy and mellow, beautiful and sad. He sings in an almost Valiuminduced country blues stupor, but the music is more complex--a grand mix of sweeping electronic reverbs and simple acoustic guitar. —Interscope Records 2002 [SAMANTHA CAMPOS]

THIEVERY CORPORATION “THE OUTERNATIONAL SOUND” No one has better taste than Thievery Corporation. They are the masters at finding the most obscure, original and irresistible songs from all over the world and remixing them into the perfect downtempo compilations. On a rainy evening, if you pour some nice wine with your honey, this album will set the mood for playful passion. Most of the album is made up of groovy, funky, sweaty jazz licks, some tunes reminiscent of blacksploitation soundtracks, a little reggae and the dopest breakbeats. Thievery Corporation’s original dub sound, a little different than traditional Jamaican style, sounds remarkable in its own right. —Esl Music 2004 [JOE GATTO]

“LOUDER THAN BOMBS” THE SMITHS By definition, a good rainy day album derives from a depressing, rainy place. That’s why the London-based Smiths are the gods of the rainy day album. Everything on this album is either humdrum or outright miserable. Even the cover is sad! I hate the rain. This is what I look like every time it rains: I prop my head up with the lit cigarette hand. In the other hand, I’ve usually got the remote control to the stereo. Sometimes I’ve got a scotch on the rocks in that hand. Sometimes I’m holding my penis. Actually, the rain ain’t so bad. —Warner Bros. 1987 [$AYFOO]

“THE MASTERS, DISC #2” BILLIE HOLIDAY Where is Billie Holiday from? Somewhere in the Midwest, right?

Missouri? It’s miserable there, too. Oh. Wait a second. Let me look this up… Billie Holliday is from Philadelphia! I officially retract my earlier statement in The Smiths review about the depressing place thing. Billie is the shit! Man, can she swoon! Her voice makes ya want to grab a dame by the ass and dance! Both are very fun rainy day things to do. The only reason I didn’t review the first album of this double-disc is because my lame-ass ex-girlfriend took it from me. She is one of those borrow-the-disc-return-the-cover-but-keep-the-disc morons. Oh, it gets better… guess what she replaced it with? The fucking Counting Crows! Now I want to kill. —Eagle Records 1997 [$AYFOO] Have a CD you want to tell the world about? Or music you think deserves a smarmy critique?

Send it over to sam@mauitime.com. MTW

ARTS&ENTERTAINMENT

BY SAMANTHA CAMPOS

Music from the Master DJ Rob Swift’s Top 10 Must-Have Albums In the world of music, there are few scratch masters. Rob Swift is one, making a name for himself in 1991 with the turntablist crew the X-ecutioners. The next year, he was declared DMC/Technics East Coast DJ champion. He has since gone on to remix and produce tracks for artists like Cornershop and Lords of Acid. Like most master mixologists, Swift is adept at multi-tasking, scoring hi-tech games and television projects, occasionally spinning at major clubs worldwide, as well as combining forces with jazz greats Herbie Hancock and Bob James.

Anyway, just as you would ask your mom for cold remedies, your mechanic what kind of car you should buy or your gay neighbor for interior decorating advice, we asked DJ Rob Swift what music we absolutely, positively should not live

without. Here are his top 10 must-have albums, along with his expert reasons why:

1. ILLMATIC Nas This album symbolizes what goes through the mind of a young black male in NYC. Also, this was the first Hip Hop album that featured a variety of producers (Large Professor, Pete Rock, DJ Premier, Q-Tip.) It was innovative lyrically and sonically.

2. IT TAKES A NATION OF MILLIONS...

Public Enemy

DJ Rob Swift & DV One DJs Rob Swift and DV One will spin on Friday at Hapa’s in Kihei. Doors open at 10 p.m. Tickets are $11, available at Request Records in Wailuku. Call 244-9315.

Spinnin

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3. RAISING HELL Run DMC

how FREE S

9pm

The Kings of Rap—what else can I say?

Every single song on this album is dope.

4. BREAKING ATOMS Main Source

Not only was this one of the best-produced albums ever (Bomb Squad), but it was also the most revolutionary Hip Hop album. It made people think about the social issues that affect us all.

Thug rLastedNigahty...

7 1/2

This is a must-have album, especially if you focus more on the production side of Hip Hop. Large Professor produced this album and revolutionized beat-making in the process. If don’t have it, find it!

5. BLOOD SUGAR SEX MAGIC Red Hot Chili Peppers Here, the Chili Peppers are paving the way for future groups like Korn and Linkin Park.

Rick Rubin (Run DMC, LL Cool J, Beastie Boys) produced this album.

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Metal’s version of Public Enemy. I love this album and I love this group. It features the hardest beats that make you wanna bang your head against a wall. Another Rick Rubin production.

7. DARK SIDE OF THE MOON Pink Floyd

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6. TOXICITY System of A Down

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This is some of the best music you’ll ever hear. The music is hypnotic and there is message behind it all. I love how all of the songs blend into each other.

8. ARE YOU EXPERIENCED? Jimi Hendrix There would be no Prince, Lenny Kravitz or Andre 2000 if it weren’t for Hendrix.

9. MIDNIGHT MARAUDERS A Tribe Called Quest Really good Hip Hop, plain and simple!

VER $10 CO

1 2/

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NEW MENU! NOW SERVING BREAKFAST SAT & SUN MON-FRI 11AM-2AM SAT-SUN 8AM-2AM

10. 3 FEET HIGH AND RISING De la Soul The first Hip Hop group to incorporate interludes in their music. MTW

The master in question

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 27, 2005

25

thursday

1/27

BADA BING

friday 1/28

saturday1/29

sunday1/30

monday1/31 – wednesday2/2

Pono Players, Comedy Improv $15, 8pm

1945 S Kihei Road, Kihei - 875-0188

BLUE LAGOON

TUE - Carroll Brothers, No cover, 7-10pm

658 Front St., Lahaina - 661-8141

BOCALINO

Kilohana No cover, 10pm

1279 S. Kihei Road, Kihei - 874-9299

CASANOVA

1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

Neto Peraza $5, 10pm

Gina Martinelli Band $5, 10pm

DJ Alex Grahm NYC $10, 9:45pm

Vince Esquire & Band $8, 9:45pm

DJ Shark in the Water No cover, 9pm

WED - Ladies’ Night, $5, 9:45pm

Head High 9pm

CHARLEY’S

142 Hana Hwy, Paia - 579-9453

MON - Mark Epstein & Friends, Blues & Jazz, 10pm; TUE - Jay Molina & Gilbert Emata, 10pm; WED - Soul Concept w/Curtis Williams, No cover, 10pm

Wed - Sunn Lounge w/DJs Sal, Lucky & Kev, $5, 9pm-1:30am

COMPADRES BAR & GRILL Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-7189

DA KINECALENDAR BIG SHOWS Jody Watley - Thursday (tonight!) and Friday. Grammy award-winning Jody Watley, has earned a reputation forged both as a part of Shalamar and as a solo artist.

Affectionately referred to by her dedicated fans as "The Queen of Cool,” Jody has effortlessly performed R&B, pop, dance and jazz. Jody’s debut single, "Looking For a New Love," was a smash hit an influential slice of dance-pop with an unforgettable trend setting video. Her self titled debut album had several more major hits, including "Don't You Want Me," "Still a Thrill." Tickets: $20 adv/$25 door. 9:30 p.m., Paradice Bluz, 744 Front Street, Lahaina, 667-5299.

Jake Shimabukuro - Friday-Sunday. Jake Shimabukuro pushes the boundaries of the ‘ukulele into previously undiscovered territory with a mind-bog-

E E V I V E L I V L I L SIIC C C S U I U S M MU M

S CH RPUP CRUNN 7 OVE 2 C / O 1 Thurs BOX EN JUKE P O 8 Fri 1/2 OBERTS ENNY R K DS IE & FR N Sat 1/29 THE HALE & BAND A V R Sun 1/30 HOT LNA O COVE ITE! E BOX N K U J 1 ITE! Mon 1/3 E BOX N K U J 1 Tues 2/ OORE JOHN M T E J PRO C Wed 2/2

gling exploration of music, from finger twisting classics to Hawaiian favorites and jazz improvisation. He is truly a new breed of ´ukulele player, blending the sweetness of traditional Hawaiian music with the showmanship of arena rock, combining lightning fast technique with great aloha. He’s also the winner of multiple Na Hoku Hanohano awards, including Favorite Entertainer of the Year. Tickets: $28. 7:30 p.m., McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

Ladysmith Black Mambazo - Tuesday. The Long Walk to Freedom Tour. They have become cultural emissaries, bringing the soulful music of black South African mine workers to worldwide attention with concert tours, high-profile “command performances” and numerous appearances in movies, theater and TV. Their finely nuanced a cappella harmonies are “like one deep, rich, resonant and proud voice” transform-

ing serious themes into joyous and celebratory music.

Tickets: $28, $18, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW.

TICKETS ON SALE All That Dance - Feb 3. Maui Song and Dance, with Day Dance Company & Friends, present an exhilarating evening of live dance and song. Kimberly Day’s uniquely hot and humorous jazz choreography made her a favorite in Los Angeles theater and television circles. She brings a new fast-paced program of works set to music ranging from Chicago and Cabaret to Magic Carpet Ride. Guest choreographers and dancers expand the evening’s experience with HipHop from Joel Suarez, Lyrical Dance by Jamie Woodbury, Rumba by Dennis and Jennifer Goss, Tap

by Jill Okura, Dance. Tickets: $20. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Ahn Trio - Feb 4. Korean sisters Angella, Maria & Lucia Ahn comprise an intriguing piano-violin-cello ensemble. From their first TV appearance in Korea to their current “AhnPlugged” World Tour, they have entertained and emboldened the classical audience, reaching out to new audiences with a repertoire ranging from Haydn and Beethoven to John Zorn, Astor Piazolla and The Doors. Tickets: $28-$10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

Judy’s Gang in "It’s All In The Name!" - Feb 5. An evening of tap and jazz dance with a "name" theme.

Join the fun with 130 dancers, ages 3 to 84. Tickets:

EH BRAH!

TALK IS CHEAP

HAPPY HOUR DAILY 3pm - 6pm 2411 S. Kihei Rd. 879-0602

VOTED BEST SPORTS BAR ON MAUI! 26

JANUARY 27, 2005

DA KINE CALENDAR

SEND YOUR EH BRAH TO ehbrah@mauitime.com

$11 adults, $10 seniors and students. 7 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Alan Clements Live - Feb 5. Spiritually Incorrect. The Burning Bush Anti-War Tour presents an evening of spoken word entertainment, along with improvisational metaphysical-political monologue combining comedy, satire drama, dharma and activism. Tickets: $22 advance/$27 door. 8 p.m., The Studio Maui in the Haiku Market Place, 575-9390.

Keali‘i Reichel: Kukahi 2005 - Feb 11-12. Keali‘i Reichel spreads his message of the living culture of Hawai`i to the world. His halau is known throughout the islands, on the Mainland and in Japan, and his collections of Hawaiian traditional and contemporary music have insured his place in Hawaiian music history by critical and popular acclaim. Tickets: $38, $30, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

Les Yeux Noirs - Feb 17. Les Yeux Noirs (pronounced lays-yuh-nwahr, which means “The Black Eyes”) takes its name from a Russian gypsy tune of the 1930s— perfect for a French sextet with a musical meld of klezmer, Eastern European gypsy, North African melodies and French gypsy jazz. The exuberant combination of traditional and original songs of travel, love, lament and celebration persuades the listener to break free from the burdens of life. Tickets: $25, $18, $10.

7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, 242-SHOW. Rennie Harris’s Pure Movement - Feb 18. Rennie Harris founded Pure Movement based on the belief that hip-hop encompasses diverse and rich AfricanAmerican traditions, carried forward by a new generation through the ever-evolving interpretation of dance.

With its roots in the inner-city African-American and Latino communities, Hip-Hop expresses universal themes that extend beyond racial, religious and economic boundaries. Tickets: $28, $18, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

St. Petersburg String Quartet with Paul GalbraIth Mar 3. - The St. Petersburg String Quartet has built a reputation of worldwide proportions. Audiences from Toronto to Tokyo, from Lithuania to London consistently give the Quartet standing ovations and great critical acclaim. Phenomenal world-renowned guitarist Paul Galbraith joins the quartet for this program, which includes: Boccherin’s Fandango for Guitar and Strings; Dvorak String Quartet No.10; Castelnuovo’s Tedesco Quintet for Guitar and Strings; and Bach guitar solos.

Tickets: $28, $10. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Little Feat - Mar 4. An American rock & roll phenomenon, showcasing their funky blend of blues, country and R&B. Technically-gifted band members continue to rock, with the unique jazzy sound that helped the band earn their cult following among critics and musicians for the past 30 years. Tickets: $40, $35, $30.

7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Airto Moreira and Flora Purim with Kenny Endo Mar 11. Latin/Jazz great Airto Moreira (voted #1 percussionist in the world 23 times in 30 years; played with Weather Report, Miles Davis, Chick Corea and

thursday 1/27 ERIK’S SEAFOOD & SUSHI

friday1/28

saturday1/29

HAPA’S NIGHTCLUB

DJ Rob Swift, DJ Dvone 9pm

Ladies Night Out 9pm

41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-9001

monday1/31 – wednesday2/2

Open Mic Night 10:30pm

DJ Rainbow 10pm

843 Wainee St., Lahaina - 662-8780

sunday1/30

Salsa Swing Party 4pm-Close

Flava Zone

HARD ROCK CAFÉ

MON - Willie K TUE - Ultra Fab w/Fat Joe, 9pm; WED - Aloha Sin Night w/DJ Fat Joe, 9pm Mon - Rastafari Haile Israel w/The Kryptons, $5, 10pm

900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

HENRY’S BAR & GRILL

Gina Martinelli No cover, 6-9pm

Habenero Brothers No cover, 9pm

Evolution No cover, 9pm

Voodoo Suns No cover, 9pm

41 E. Lipoa St., Kihei - 879-2849

KAHALE’S BEACH CLUB

No entertainment

36 Keala Place, Kihei - 875-7711

NDE $5, 10pm

KAHULUI ALE HOUSE

355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

Copacobana Night, $5, 10pm

No entertainment

Karaoke w/James 10pm

DA KINECALENDAR Mickey Hart) and six-octave range vocalist Flora Purim (Return to Forever Band, Grammy nominee, and Downbeat Magazine's “Best Female Singer”) join forces with Hawaii’s own taiko drum master Kenny Endo in a rare performance not to be missed! An unforgettable experience of sound and cultural fusion.

Tickets: $35, $30, $25. 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

Hapa - Mar 12. Evocative island sounds are created by the slack-key/vocal team of Barry Flanagan and Nathan Aweau. Barry is one of the most prolific and wellrespected composers, performers and producers in Hawaii‘i. His slack-key innovations are enriched by the vocals and compositions of Nathan, who is as adept at crafting beautiful Hawaiian music as laying down tasty jazz grooves. They will be joined by Charley Ka`upu, renowned for chanting, to provide another summit on a truly magical Maui evening. Tickets: $35, $25, $10.

7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

Youth Symphony - Mar 13. In Celebration of Hawaii’s Youth Symphony, 40th Anniversary Season. More than 90 inspiring student musicians take the stage. The performance features exciting premier pieces Maestro Henry Miyamura will conduct Youth Symphony I, the most advanced of HYSA’s seven orchestra’s. Free.

7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW. Ebb & Flow Arts - Mar 17. This performance will be the centerpiece of the annual Ebb & Flow Arts festival; this year entitled "North South East West." Featured ensemble musicians will be Scott Anderson, clarinet; Ignace Jang, violin; and Robert Pollock, piano, along with special guest artists. The program includes recent works by distinguished composers from Japan, Europe, the United States and Latin America, including the premiere of one multi-media work. Tickets: $25.

7:30 p.m., McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, 242-7469.

Dianne Reeves - April 10. Dianne Reeves is an empress in the jazz world, with expansive range, impeccable pitch and evocative compositions. The simmering effect Dianne brings to a song has earned her many plaudits and special appearances, ranging from HBO to the Olympics as well as the major jazz festivals and the LA Philharmonic. But Dianne says, "The most rewarding thing is to be able to continue to sing with my heart and soul. Tickets: $38, $28, $20.

7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC, 242-SHOW.

EVENTs

SATURDAY, JANUARY 29 The Saturday Night Drive-in Theater - 5:30 p.m. at the Maui Community College. Live music and aloha from Uncle Boy Kanae and friends, along with three films and award winning food booths. Admission $20 for four adults, $40 VIP. Keiki under 10, free. For info, call 573-5530.

Tsunami Relief Rummage Sale - 8 a.m.-2 p.m. at Maui Myth & Magic Theater, Lahaina. Items include all types of furniture, accessories, baked goods, car wash. Benefit is to support Unicef. For info, call 6619914.

LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

Tattoo Night - 7 p.m. at Life’s A Beach, Kihei. Judging and prizes by Maui's best artists, Evolved Art, Hot Rod Ink, Sacred Center Tattoo, Island Ink, and Maui Tattoo Co. Additional prizes by Hot Rod Ally, and Love Shack.

Along with live entertainment by Prankster. For info, call 891-8010.

YMCA Yard Sale -- 7 a.m.-12 p.m. at 250 Kanaloa Ave, across War Memorial Stadium. Including children's items, clothing, sporting goods, furniture and other items for home and garden. Donations are excepted.

For info, call 248-8355.

Maui County’s Computer Swap - 10 a.m.-2 p.m. at War Memorial Gym parking lot. Business and residents can recycle computer equipment. Items will be fixed and donated to local schools, agencies and non profit organizations. For info, call 877-2524.

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 2

Kimo’s – Sam Ahia, Wed thru Sun, 7-8:30 p.m. 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4811.

Leilani’s On The Beach – Crazy Fingers, Thu, 4-6 p.m.; JD & Friends, Fri - Sat, 2:30 -5:30 p.m.; Kilohana, Sun, 3:30-6 p.m; 2435 Ka’anapali Parkway, Building J, Ka’anapali, 661-4495.

Moose McGillycuddy’s - Greg & Steve, Thu; Llayne & Greg, Fri; Mark & Mike, Sat-Sun; Anastasia, Wed. All sets 6-9 p.m. 844 Front St., Lahaina, 667-7758.

Pioneer Inn – Ah-Tim Eleniki (Local-style guitar), Thu; 6-9pm; Greg Di Piazza, Wed 6-9 pm., 658 Wharf St., Lahaina, 661-3636.

Reilley’s Steaks & Seafood - Live music (grand piano) 6-9 p.m., Gene Argelle, Mon and Tue; Joel Gold, Wed; Thu, Darrin Lenett, Fri. 4405 Honoapi`ilani Hwy, Ste #304 Kahana, 667-7477

Sea House Restaurant – Hawaiian music with Albert Kaina and Kincades Basques, Thu; Kincade Basques, Fri, Sat, Mon,Tues; Kapule Paoa, Sun; Albert Kaina, Wed. All sets 7 p.m. - 9 p.m. Napili Kai Beach Resort, 5900 Honoapiilani Road, Napili, 669-1500.

Sir Wilfred’s At Whalers Village - Sun. Live Jazz 5 p.m. - 9 p.m. Main stage. The Best Jazz Musicians on the island, along with special guest stars. 2435 Ka’anapali Park Way, Lahaina 661-0202.

SOUTH MAUI Bada Bing - Hilarious improv comedy with The Pono Players. Dinner & Show, $35. Seating 5:30-7 pm 1945 S. Kihei Rd. in Kihei 875-0188.

Blue Marlin Harbor-Front Grill & Bar - Fri, Mon Boy Kana’e and Ka’ Uhaneleo Sat Braddah Frances and friends 6:30 p.m. Sun Terri Garrison 4 - 6:30 p.m

Maui Author Brandon Wilson Reads “Yak Butter Blues” - 3 p.m. at the Library on MCC Campus in Kahului. Brandon will read from his latest book. along with, a discussion about the challenges of hiking 650 miles across Tibet, discuss life in occupied Tibet, followed by a booksigning. Free. For info, call 298-4408.

DINNER MUSIC WEST MAUI

BJ’s Chicago Pizzeria – John Kane, Wed, Thu and Fri; Harry Troupe, Sat; Kaleo Phillips, Sun; Clay Mortenson Mon, Tue. All sets from 7:30-10 p.m. 730 Front St., Lahaina, 661-0700.

Cafe O’Lei - Steve Sargenti, Tue-Fri 5:30-9 p.m. 839 Front St., Lahaina, 661-9491.

Cheeseburger in Paradise – Brooks Maguire, Thu, Sat, Sun and Wed; Harry Troupe, Fri; Gail Swanson, Mon and Tue. All sets from 4:30-7:30 p.m. and 8-11 p.m. 811 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4855.

Cool Cat Cafe - Thu & Mon The Whale Shark Erik Pietsch. 7 p.m. Howard Ahia Fri-Sun, 6:30 - Close. Hau Phat, Wed. 7 - 10 p.m. Wharf Cinema Center, Lahaina, 667-0908.

Fish & Game Brewing Co. & Rotisserie - Nino Toscano, Thur, Fri; Kawika Lum Ho, Sat; Damien, Tue; E rnest Puaa, Sun-Wed; Brian Haia, Mon. All sets from 6-9 p.m. 4405 Honoapiilani Highway, 669-3474.

Hula Grill - Kawika Lum , Albert & Billy, Mon; Jarret Roback and Albert & Billy, Tue; Ernest Pua’a and Brian & Roy, Wed; Ernest Pua’a and Bradah Brian & Don Thur; Bradah Brian & Roy, Fri; Ernest Pua’a Kawika Lum and, Sat; Kawika Lum Ryan Tanaka & Friends.

Sun. 2435 Kaanapali Parkway, Building P, Kaanapali, 667-6636.

Java Jazz/Soup Nutz – Acoustic Music with Mike Fri-Sat only 7 p.m. 3350 Lower Honoapiilani Rd., 6670787.

Kahana Terrace Restaurant – Harry Troupe, Tue and Thu; Randy Reno, Sat. All sets from 6-9 p.m.

Sands of Kahana Resort, 669-5399.

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 27, 2005

27

thursday1/27 KIMO’S

friday1/28 TBA

Crazy Fingers Duo 10pm-12 am

Karaoke 9:30pm

Karaoke 9:30pm

845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811

KOBE JAPANESE STEAKHOUSE 136 Dickenson St., Lahaina - 667-5555

saturday1/29

sunday1/30

monday1/31 – wednesday2/2

LIFE’S A BEACH

Latin Night w/DJ Nexus No cover, 9pm

Hundred Proof No cover, 9pm

Prankstser No cover, 9pm

Free Karaoke No cover, 9pm

MON - Open Jam w/Adam 9pm; TUE - Crunch Pups, No cover, 9pm; WED - Guys’ Night Out, 9pm

LOBBY LOUNGE

Jazz w/Sal Godinez & Marcus Johnson, 8:30-11:30pm

Clay Mortensen & George Tavoularis, 8:30-11:30pm

Nils & Anastasia 8:30-11:30pm

Pam Peterson & Rudy Baria, 8:30-11:30pm

MON - Tiffany Lee & Josh, 8:30-11:30pm; WED - Clay Mortensen & Gilbert Emata, 8:30-11:30pm

Merv Ohana No cover, 8pm

The Whillys No cover, 8pm

Larry Council Band No cover, 8pm

Service Industry Night, No cover, 9pm

MON - Monster Mondays, No cover; TUE - Tini Tuesdays, No cover; WED - Karaoke night w/Tyrone, No cover, 8-11pm

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891–8010

Four Seasons Resort, Wailea - 874-8000

LULU’S

1945-H S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-9944

DA KINECALENDAR Maalaea Harbor, 244-8844.

Capische? – Mark Johnston; Thu-Sat; Brian Cuomo Su, Wed; Sal & Estaire Godinez, Mon.; all sets 7-10 p.m. Diamond Resort, 555 Kaukahi, 879-2224.

Maalaea Grill – Benoit Jazz Works, Thu, Fri and Sun, 6:30-9 p.m.; Jimmy C Jazz, Sat, 7-9 p.m. Maalaea Village Shops, 243-2206.

Marco’s Southside Grill – Various artists (piano), Mon -Sun. All sets from 7-10 p.m. 1445 S. Kihei Rd., 874-4041.

Mulligan’s on the Blue – Fri ,Tue, Wailea Nights, , dinner and show. 8- 10p.m.; Celtic Tigers, Sun, 7-10 p.m., Mon Gypsy Pacific 8-10 p.m. 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874-1131.

Seawatch Restaurant - Nightly Music 6 -9 p.m.

100 Wailea Golf Club Dr., 875-8080.

South Shore Tiki Lounge - Sunset happy hour $3 special's. Live entertainment Sun, Tue, Thu Tony & Peter. Wed & Fri Trevor Jones 4-6pm. Outdoor seating on the Aloha Jungle Lanai. 1913 Kihei Road, Kalama Village, 874-6444.

Tommy Bahama’s Tropical Café – Wed-Fri; guitar and vocals w/ Brado, Sat; Brian Wittman Sun-Mon; Patrick Mayor, Tue All sets from 6-10 p.m. The Shops at Wailea, 875-9983.

Seafood Restaurant & Sushi Bar Last Valentine’s Day, nothing worked.

This year I’ll be smarter!

- Flowers - Teddy Bear - Hallmark Card - Sansei & Chocolate

✘

Yorman’s By The Sea – All That Jazz Band, Wed,- Sun 7 p.m.- 10 p.m. 760 S. Kihei Rd. Kihei 874-8385.

CENTRAL MAUI Mañana Garage – Nightly Neto & Friends, Latin music, 6:30 -9 p.m. 33 Lono Ave., Kahului, 873-0220.

Café Marc Aurel - Live entertainment 28 N. Market Street, Wailuku near the Iao Theatre. 280-5814.

Sushi Go - Presents a concept unlike anything we’ve seen on Maui: Conveyor-belt sushi. Live Music every Wed. 4 p.m. - 8 p.m. Queen Ka'ahumanu Center, Kahului, 877-8744.

UPCOUNTRY MAUI Jacque’s - Mon, Live Jazz; Highway, Paia, 579-8844.

5 p.m.120 Hana

Swan Court. The Blue Note Swing Orchestra, Dancing nightly to Swing.Tue,Th, Sat, 2 p.m.- 4 p.m.

Spats: Weeping Banyan Lounge with nightly Live Hawaiian Contemporary Music 6:30 p.m. - 9:30 p.m.

Ka’anapali Beach Hotel 2525 Kaanapali Parkway, 661-0011 Kupanaha: Maui Magic for All Ages Illusions and dinner show Tue-Sat, 4:30 p.m., Kanahele Room; Lanui, live music and dancing, 6-9 nightly. Free hula show, 6:30-7:30 nightly; Sunday Champagne Brunch with Hawaiian music by Polinahe, 9 a.m.-1 p.m.

Kapalua Bay Hotel 1 Bay Drive, Kapalua, 669-5656 The Bay Club: Jazz trio, Fri and Sat, 6-9 p.m.; solo pianist, Sun-Thu, 6-9 p.m.; Gardenia Court: contemporary Hawaiian music, Sun, 9:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m.; Lehua Lounge: Free hula show nightly 5:30-7 and contemporary Hawaiian music 7-8:30.

Maui Marriott 100 Nohea Kai Drive, Kaanapali, 667-1200 Nalu’s: Kilohana, Wed, 8-10:30 p.m.

Napili Kai Beach Resort 5900 Honoapiilani Highway, Napili, 669-1500 Hawaiian Music: Kincaid & Albert, Thu; Kincaid Basques Fri-Sat, Mon-Tue; Kapule Paoa, Sun; Albert Kaina, Wed; All Hawaiian music shows from 7-9 p.m.

Ritz-Carlton Kapalua One Ritz-Carlton Drive, Kapalua, 669-6200 Lobby Lounge: Live music, 6-10 nightly. Banyan Tree Restaurant: World fusion duo Ranga Pae,Tue-Sat, 6:15-9:45 p.m.

Kapalua Indoor Amphitheater: Masters of Hawaiian Slack Key Guitar Concerts series features traditional Hawaiian music. Every Tues 6 p.m.- 8:30 p.m. Tickets: $40 visitor and $30 kama`aina rate.

The Legend of Kaulula'au: Young Hawaiians loving their culture and willing to perpetuate an aspect of their Hawaiian culture, the art of storytelling. Every Sunday at 4 p.m. and 6:30 p.m. Tickets: $30 and $27 Kama'aina. 1-888-808-1055.

From the ancient scriptures of love, I know this will work!

Join us this Valentine’s Day for our special guaranteed menu.

Livewire Cafe - Various Artist Tue 7-10 p.m. 137 Hana Highway, Paia, 579-6009.

Royal Lahaina Resort 2780 Kekaa Drive, Kaanapali, 661-3611

Moana Cafe - Hula Honeys, vintage and contemporary Hawaiian music with elegance and aloha. Wed, Fri Live Jazz. Sun Anik 6-9 p.m. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9999.

"Eddie and Eddie" w/Eddie Lilikoi and Eddie Sebala, 5-9:30 nightly in the Royal Ocean Terrace.

Royal Lahaina Luau featuring authentic Hawaiian and Polynesian song and dance at 5 nightly.

Kapalua 669-6286

WEST MAUI

The Shops at Kapalua

Kihei 879-0004 Near Foodland

28

JANUARY 27, 2005

DA KINE CALENDAR

RESORT SHOWS

Embassy Vacation Resort – Ka’anapali Beach 104 Ka’anapali Shores, Lahaina, 661-2000 Ohana Bar & Grill: Live music, Thu & Wed; Patrick Major, Fri; Wayne & Friends, Sat; Scott Baird & Gretchen, Sun; Ernest Pua’a w/ Hawaiian music, Mon & Tue. All sets from 5:30-9:30 p.m. Torch lighting ceremony nightly.

Sheraton Maui Hotel 2605 Kaanapali Parkway, 661-0031 Lagoon Bar Entertainment w/hula dancers, 6-8 nightly: Bobby & Ralph, Thu, Mon and Tue; Ralph & Allan, Fri; Fausto & Kawaika, Sat and Sun; Nathan & Ralph, Wed; torchlighting and cliff diving ceremony at sunset, 7-8 nightly.

The Westin Maui Hotel 2365 Kaanapali Parkway, 667-2525

thursday 1/27

friday1/28

MANGO GRILL AND BAR

saturday1/29

sunday1/30

monday1/31 – wednesday2/2

Get Your Groove On Fridays w/DJ 1/2 Pint, $5, 9:30pm

2290 Kaanapali Pkwy, Lahaina, 667-1929

MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDY’S

DJ Mackie Mac No cover, 9pm

DJ Mackie Mac No cover, 9pm

DJ Rock Hard Tark No cover, 9pm

DJ Rock Hard Tark No cover, 9pm

MON - DJ Mackie Mac & DJ Rock Hard; TUE - DJ Mackie Mac, & Big Zeck, $5, 9pm; WED - DJ Mackie Mac, No cover, 9pm

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE

Wailea Nights 8pm

Wailea Nights 8pm

Murray Thorne 9pm

Celtic Tigers No cover, 7pm

MON - Gypsy Pacific, No cover, 7pm; TUE - Acoustico, No cover, 7pm; WED - No Entertaiment

NEPTUNES

Stash Pocket 10pm

Cool Rush 10pm

Goldawn Child 10pm

Adam Bowen No cover, 10pm

MON - Erin Smith,10pm; TUE - Smooth Tuesday w/Curtis Williams, No cover, 10pm; WED - Jroq, 10pm

Live Jazz, No cover 9pm-12am

Live Jazz, No cover, 9pm-12am

Jody Watley $20 adv/$25 door, 9pm

NuffSedd $8, 9pm

Willie K $3, 8pm

MON - Manic Mondays/80’s night, $5, 9pm; TUE - Live Jazz, $5, 9pm; WED - Live Blues w/Bobby Ingram, $5, 9pm

844 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7758

100 Kaukahi St., Wailea - 874-1131

1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 874-2555

PACIFIC’O

505 Front St., Lahaina - 667-4341

Jody Watley $20 adv/$25 door, 9pm

PARADICE BLUZ 744 Front St. 667-5299

Dr.Nat Available for private events, parties & weddings

Solo/duets and with Pacificaribe Jacque’s every Monday 7-10pm No Cover (3-5 piece) playing Latin, Gypsy and Brazilian Jazz, Reggae, Contemporary Island Style or with Hot Tropical Latin/Brazilian dance band Rio Ritmo (6-9 piece) playing Salsa, Samba, Pop Latin

“NO PAIN...NO STAIN” OPEN 10 AM 7 DAYS TO A WEEK CLOSE

Thanks to all of those who voted

Island Ink the “Best Tattoo Shop” on Maui for Two Years in a Row

100 HANA HWY. PAIA 579-9461 WWW.ISLANDINKTATTOO.COM

Call 572-9536 for booking orvisit website www.drnat.com

JAN-FEB SUNDAY

MONDAY

TUESDAY

MAUI’S TRUE LIVE MUSIC VENUE WEDNESDAY

THURSDAY 27

AMNESIA THURSDAYS WITH JODY WATLEY 30

WILLIE K

31

1

MANIC MONLIVE JAZZ DAY 80’s MUSIC 80’s PRICES

6

7

2

3

9

10

AMNESIA LIVE BLUES THURSDAYS BOBBY INGRAM WITH ADINA HOWARD

8

AMNESIA LIVE BLUES THURSDAYS MANIC MONWILLIE K LIVE JAZZ BOBBY INGRAM WITH DAY 80’s MUSIC PM 80’s PRICES DAWN CHECK PARADICEBLUZ.COM FOR CALENDAR UPDATES

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

28

29

MIDNIGHT LOUNGE WITH JODY WATLEY 4

MIDNIGHT LOUNGE WITH ADINA HOWARD 11

MIDNIGHT LOUNGE WITH PM DAWN

LIVE MUSIC WITH NUFFSEDD 5

LIVE MUSIC WITH EKOLU 12

LIVE MUSIC WITH ROWAN BROTHERS

744 FRONT STREET • A FEW STEPS BELOW FRONT STREET • 667-JAZZ (5299) • paradicebluz.com LETTERS

NEWS

COVER STORY

SURF

DINING

DAY&NIGHT

A&E

FILM

DA KINE CALENDAR

THE GRID

CLASSIFIEDS

MAUI TIME WEEKLY

JANUARY 27, 2005

29

thursday1/27

friday1/28

DJs Durty & Miah No cover, 9pm

Vince Esquire $5, 9pm

Karaoke, 10pm-1am Karaoke, 10pm-1am

Karaoke, 10pm-1am Karaoke, 10pm-1am

SANDBAR & GRILL

89 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8742

SANSEI 115 Bay Dr., Kapalua - 669-6286 SANSEI Kihei Town Center - 879-0004

saturday1/29

sunday1/30

monday1/31 – wednesday2/2

John Moore, The Easy, Khrinj $10, 9pm

Open Mic Night w/Jarod No cover, 9pm

MON - North Shore Sextet, No cover, 10pm; TUE- John Moore Project, 9pm; WED - Lawai’a, No cover, 10pm

Gomega No cover, 9:30 pm-Close

MON - DJ ED V, No cover, 10pm; TUE - DJ Bad Ass Tony, No cover, 10pm

Hale & The Hot Lava Band No cover, 9pm

MON - Jukebox Nite, No cover; TUE - Jukebox Nite, No cover; WED - John Moore Project, 9pm

DJ Blast $10, 9:30pm

SPATS TRATTORIA

Hyatt Regency, Kaanapali - 667-4727

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE 1913 S. Kihei Rd - 874-6444

Crunch Pups No cover, 9pm

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR 2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-0602

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR 1127 Makawao Ave. - 572-1380

TSUNAMI NIGHTCLUB

3850 Wailea Alanui Dr. - 875-1234

Open Jukebox 9pm

Kenny Roberts & Friends 9pm

Crunch Pups $3, 9pm

El Dogs $3, 9pm

DJ Dancing, $10, 9:30pm-2am

DJ Dancing, $10, 9:30pm-2am

DA KINECALENDAR Tropica: Mitch Kepa, Mon & Sat-Su; Benny Uyetake, Tue-Fri. 6-9 p.m. Tableside magic by Fortunato Tue & Thu, and Wed& Sat 7- 9p.m.

SOUTH MAUI Four Seasons Resort Wailea 3900 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 874-8000 Lobby Lounge, Hawaiian music w/Steve Repollo and Alan Villeran, Thu, 5:30-7:30 p.m. followed by jazz w/Sal Godinez and Marcus Johnson, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; contemporary music w/Clay Mortensen and George Tavoularis, Fri, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; island style trio, Sat and Mon, 5:307:30 p.m. w/hula dancer 5:30-6:30 p.m.; Pam Peterson and Rudy Baria, Sun, 8:30-11:30 p.m.; Nils & Anastasia (of VooDoo Suns) live & unplugged Mon and Sat, 8:3011:30 p.m.; Clay Mortensen and Gilbert Emata, Wed, 8:30-11:30 p.m. Sunset torchlighting nightly.

Wed. and Fri, 6-8 p.m., Mon-Sat, 8:30-10:30 p.m. and Mon, Wed and Fri, 9 a.m.-1 p.m.

Grand Wailea Resort Hotel & Spa 3850 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 875-1234

EAST MAUI

Botero Bar entertainment, 5:30-9:30 Live Music Wed; Strolling Hawaiian duo in the Humuhumunukunukuapua’a nightly.

Hotel Hana-Maui Hana, 248-8211

The Fairmont Kea Lani Maui 4100 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 875-4100

Hawaiian Music in Paniolo Lounge, Thu thru Sun, 6:30-9:30 p.m.; Hula show, every Thu and Sun, 7:30-8:15 p.m. in the Main Dining Room.

Cafe Ciao Restaurant. Jazz entertainment from 69 nightly.

ART

Wailea Marriott 3700 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 879-1922

Remains of a Rainbow - Through Feb 20, 11 a.m.5 p.m. at Schaefer International Gallery, MACC. Hawaii` is often called “the endangered species capital of the world.” In this nationally-acclaimed traveling exhibit, David Littschwager and Susan Middleton’s intimate photographic portraits of these endangered species invite viewers into a close-up view of their world. Free. For info, call 242-7469.

Hawaiian Entertainment w/hula 6-9 nightly in Kumu Bar & Grill. Hawaiian entertainment 9-11 nightly in the Mele Mele Lounge featuring Pam Gamboa Peterson Mon and Sat, Mitch Kepa & Raymond "Mundo" Medeiros. Paradise & Ka Poe O Hawaii perform at the Luau, Mon, Tue, Thu and Fri. Renaissance Wailea Beach Resort 3550 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 879-4900

Craig Mullins - Friday through Feb 15, 6-10 p.m at Carolyn Quan Gallery, Lahainaluna Rd. Craig Mullins, a pioneer in the digital art that is now standard in films, will show three original paintings and 25 giclee prints, along with some "digital hybrids" that he says take advantage of the strengths of both digital and traditional art. For info, call 667-4362.

Sunset Terrace; Live music by Lono, Thu; Brado Mamalias, Fri; Rama Camarillo, Sat-Sun; Bobby Krueger, Mon-Wed; all sets 6-9 p.m. Wailea Sunset Luau, Tue, Thu and Sat, 6-8:30 p.m.

Maui Prince Hotel 5400 Makena Alanui, 874-1111

KEIKI

Molokini Lounge: Ron Kuala’au, Hawaiian and contemporary guitar and vocals, Sun, 6-10:30 p.m. and Tue, Thu and Sat, 6-8:30 p.m. Mele ‘Ohana duo, Mon,

900 Front St., Lahaina Info: 808.667.7400 ST

$3 Red Stripes

REGGAE AT THE ROCK with Marty Dread's band featuring Haile Iyah Israel

$5 COVER

THURSDAY MARCH 3RD

HAPPY HOUR! 3-6pm & 10pm-12am EXCEPT SPECIAL EVENTS ALL SHOWS ARE 21 & OVER h a r d r o c k . c o m

JANUARY 27, 2005

WATCH THE

SUPER

BOWL

HERE! Y A D N SU FEB. 6

featuring Spike (Swingin’ Utters) Joey (Lagwagon) Dave (Lagwagon) Fat Mike (NOFX) and special guest! TIX ON SALE NOW!

30

Open House at Haleakala Waldorf School - Sat, 10 a.m.-12 p.m. A Waldorf education engages children's imaginations and curiosity by teaching the core academic principles of history, math, language arts and foreign languages through the visual arts, drama, music, creative writing and movement For info, call 878-2511.

LECTURES Why Whales Do That - Mon-Sat, 12:45 p.m. & 3:15 p.m. at the Ocean Science Discovery Center in Ma’alaea. Multimedia presentation focusing on intriguing behaviors of Hawaii’s humpback whales. Includes thrilling imagery, whale songs and expert commentary.

Free. For info, call 249-8811.

POLITICAL Managing Director Keith Regan's "Brown Bag" Lunch - 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. in the Mayor’s Lounge located on the ninth floor of the Kalana O’ Maui Building. This lunch offers county employees an opportunity to speak with our administration in regards to sharing knowledge, ideas, innovations, concerns and suggestions to help better serve the public. For more info, call 270-7855.

SPORTS

HRC MAUI

MONDAY JANUARY 31

Two Lego Engineering Classes - Mon-Tue through

March 7, 3-4:30 p.m. at The Art School, Kapalua.

Explore engineering, architecture, physics, and math using specialized Lego bricks. For keiki age five and up. Drop-Ins welcome. For info, call 298-8921.

DA KINE CALENDAR

LOTS OF GREAT GIVEAWAYS...

QUARTERLY DRINK SPECIALS CHECK OUT THE BUD GIRLS! DRINK SPECIALS ALL DAY!!!

PENNY SAYS “THE EAGLES RULE”

Wailea Golf Day - Sat, 11 a.m.-2 p.m. at Queen Kaahumanu Center. This event is to benefit Arnie’s Army Battles Prostate Cancer Foundation. Putting Contest, prize drawings and golf tips.

6th Annual Polar Bear Fin Swim - Sun, 7:45 a.m. registration at South Maluaka Beach in Wailea. Open to all swimmers. Race is at 9 a.m. For info, call 572-1718.

STAGE Big River: The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn - Fri, 7:30 p.m., Castle Theater, MACC. A musical extravaganza based on the Mark Twain classic, intertwined with a variety of American music. Tickets: $10 senior, $6 student. For info, call 242-SHOW.

Send your listings & photos for the Da Kine Calendar to calendar@mauitime.com or fax (808) 661-0446

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When you see the @ at the end of an ad, that means the advertiser has a profile (and maybe even a picture!) at our online personals site.

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For customer service call 1-617-450-8773 or email MauiTime@placepersonal.com ABBREVIATIONS: A-Asian; B-Black; C-Christian; D-Divorced; F-Female; G-Gay; H-Hispanic; J-Jewish; M-Male; N/S-Non-Smoker; P-Professional; S-Single; W-White GUIDELINES: Personals are for adults 18 or over seeking monogamous relationships. To ensure your safety, carefully screen all responses and have first meetings occur in a public place. This publication reserves the right to edit, revise, or reject any advertisement at any time at its sole discretion and assumes no responsibility for the content of or replies to any ad. Not a service of all ads have corresponding voice messages. To review our complete guidelines, call (617) 425-2636

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AUTOMOTIVE DONATE VEHICLES, BOATS, property, merchandise, collectibles to help teens in crisis. Maximize your IRS tax deductions under the new law. D’Var Institute 1-800-338-6724.

Prompt Service. (AAN CAN)

ISLAND COINS & STAMPS

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WE BUY & SELL

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coins, tokens, medals, stamps, paper money, Hawaiiana, sport collectibles

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For actors and non actors INTRODUCTORY CLASS Sat., Feb. 12, 12:30-2:30

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HIRE YOUR BOSS! Realistic $15K/month potential from home. Proven system for success. FT/PT EXECUTIVE TRAINING INCLUDED. 1800-359-8336 ext 5018. (AAN CAN) Are you seriously looking... ...for a business with a realistic first year potential of $150K+? Call tollfree 24 hour message1-888-6579689. (AAN CAN) EASY HOME BASED BUSINESS START FREE. Inc.500 Listed.

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NEWS FLASH! POLAR ICE CAPS Process E-mails Online $25.00 Per DOMAINS FOR SALE lahainarealtor.com MELTING AT ALARMING RATE! E-mail. Mystery Shoppers Earn hawaiianorganic.com Learn to SCUBA Dive Today with SHAKA $57.00/HourShopping!www.RealCas hawaiianweddingphoto.com DIVERS, Professional, Safe, Fun Lessons hPrograms.com (AAN CAN) lahainaguide.com and Dive Tours. Torpedo Dives, HydroANOTHER YEAR mauisurfphoto.com Optix Masks! (808) 250-1234 www.

SAME OLD JOB? hawaiianbeachfrontrental.com shakadivers.com it’s SHAKA-RIFIC mauigolfresorts.com $250K first year potential from home. hawaiianislandsproperty.com 1-800-881-1540 ext 0079. (AAN CAN) All offers considered $$ A CASH NOW OFFER $$ call Scott @ 541-821-1832 Turn future money from lawsuit settlements, lottery awards, and annuity into cash now. Free Quotes Call 661-3786x5 by 4 payments 1-800-815-3503 www.ppicash.com $525 WEEKLY INCOME pm on Monday to (AAN CAN) possible mailing sales letters from get your ad in home. Genuine opportunity to work CHARGE IT! Maui Time Weekly! with our wellness company. Supplies Maui Time Weekly accepts credit provided. No Selling. FT/PT. Call 1cards for classified and display ads 708-536-7040 (24 Hours).

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Ad Deadline Monday 4pm To Advertise Call 661-3786 Fax Number 808.661-0446 Email classifieds@mauitime.com Website www.mauitime.com Mailing 658 Front Street #126A-7278 • Lahaina, HI Drop off 505 Front St. Ste. 216, Lahaina

JANUARY 27, 2005

CLASSIFIED

Bubba Gump Shrimp Company

EMPLOYMENT

WANNA HAVE FUN? WANT MORE HOURS? See us today for your interview!!

NOW HIRING ALL POSITIONS Apply in person • Aplique ahora 889 Front St., Lahaina

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Send resume to: Jen Russo 658 Front St. #126A-7278, Lahaina HI 96761 or call 661-3786 x3# MEDIA MAKE-UP ARTISTS earn up to $500/day for television, ANYONE CAN DO THIS! CD/videos, film, fashion. One week I am a work from home Mom earning course in Los Angeles while building $1500+ Part Time. Call me: 573-3203, portfolio. Brochure 310-364-0665 www.joyfulsuccess.com www.MediaMakeupArtists.com (AAN CAN) MY SECRET GARDEN GOVERNMENT JOBS Earn $12-$48.00/HOUR. Available with full medical/ dental benefits, and paid training on clerical, administrative, law enforcement, homeland security, wildlife, more! 1-800-3209353 x2001. (AAN CAN)

Is looking for attractive, feminine applicants who are dependable, confident, friendly & have social etiquette for escort service and/or sensuous bodywork. No experience necessary but must have an open mind. Work is fun with us and the pay is excellent. 579-6400

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Frequencies of 1-8weeks Frequencies of 9-26weeks Frequencies of 27-52weeks

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Additional lines are $3 per each - bold and/or caps are $3 per line *Does not apply to Backside or Adult Services. Please call for pricing details.

BARTENDERS ALOHA VALUED READERS up to $1200 per week. Tips + wages. We would like to let our readers No Experience Required. Multiple know that we try to screen most of FT/PT positions available. Call 1-800- our ads. We read back the ad copy to 806-0083 ext. 202. (AAN CAN) ensure that it is the correct information that advertisers want. If you see $ MODELS WANTED $ the acronym (AAN CAN) that ad is a For calendar magazine and artistic national ad and was not submitted print work. Ages 18 to 35. 573-3712 directly to us. If you have a question directly concerning AAN CAN, please check out aancan.org

MUSIC & ARTS

MUSICIANS WANTED

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RCA/VIRGIN RECORD PRODUCER With Pro-Tracking Facility looking for a “Major Label Worthy” songwriter and/or band to produce & record demo towards possible “spec” record deal. Call (808) 573-4004 or send your recorded demo to: P.O. Box 1356, Haiku 96708

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DIVERSITY IN JOURNALISM: The Academy for Alternative Journalism, established by papers like this one to promote diversity in the alternative press, seeks talented journalists and students (college seniors and up) for a paid summer writing program at Northwestern University’s Medill School of Journalism. The eightweek program (June 19 - August 14, 2005) aims to recruit talented candidates from diverse backgrounds and train them in magazine-style feature writing. Ten participants will be chosen and paid $3,000 plus housing and travel allowances. For information visit the Web site at http://aan.org/aaj or write for an application: Academy for Alternative Journalism, Northwestern University, Medill School of Journalism, 1845 Sheridan Road, Evanston, IL 60208. Email altacademy@northwestern.edu. Application deadline February 11, 2005. Northwestern University is an equal opportunity educator and employer. (AAN CAN) WE WANT NEW WRITERS: The Academy for Alternative Journalism, supported by the Association of Alternative Newsweeklies and by alternative papers like this one, seeks experienced minority journalists and students (college seniors and up) for a paid summer writing program at Northwestern University’s Medill School of Journalism, Chicago. The eight-week program (June 19 August 14, 2005) aims to recruit talented minority writers into the alternative press and train them in magazine-style feature writing. Ten participants will be chosen and paid $3,000 plus housing and travel allowances.

While the program is designed to encourage minority writers to consider careers in the alternative press, candidates of any ethnicity may apply.

For information visit the Web site at http://www.medill.northwestern.edu/ aaj or write for an application: Academy for Alternative Journalism, Northwestern University, Medill School of Journalism, 1845 Sheridan Road, Evanston, IL 60208. Email altacademy@northwestern.edu.

Application deadline February 11, 2005.Northwestern University is an equal opportunity educator and employer. (AAN CAN)

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MAUI RECYCLING SERVICE Picks up all your glass, plastic, aluminum, tin, mixed paper, & cardboard.

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ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19) “My God, that’s an ugly baby!” Although most folks wouldn’t dream of saying this to a recent mother’s face, many of them didn’t hesitate to dump all over your labors of love in the past, the metaphorical babies you created and released into the world. Having something you’re really proud of get torn to bits by assholes has probably made you reluctant to share another of your secret masterpieces. This week, however, would be a good time to reveal that special bit of yourself, which is long overdue for public exposure. It probably won’t be universally lauded or adored—no one could guarantee that—but it will almost certainly be respected, and you can’t realistically hope for much more.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20) Other people suck, don’t they? At least, that’s what you’re likely to frequently think about them this week. It’s true that some of those you know could be more generous, but fixating on their stingy behavior will only make you bitter. They can’t be nagged or coaxed out of miserliness. Simply trying will probably only intensify it.

Unfortunately, this isn’t something you’ll be able to easily ignore, though. It’s not your job or duty to compensate for these scrooges by giving more time, energy or money (you’ve already done your fair share), but you still might want to. It’d be a nice gift, so please consider it; the world could certainly use it.

If you feel that you have been potentially exposed to HIV and would like Free, Confidential and Anonymous testing call the Maui AIDS Foundation at 242-4900.

It is important to know your HIV status so that you do not unknowingly pass the virus to others, also early detection is vital to your health and treatment.

The Maui AIDS Foundation now offers Drop-In HIV Counseling and Testing (No appointment necessary) Drop in hours are Mon.-Fri. 8:30am to 4:30pm, Wed. 8:30am to 7pm 1935 Main Street, Wailuku For more information on HIV/AIDS, STD’s including Viral Hepatitis and HIV Counseling and Testing call the Maui AIDS Foundation at 242-4900.

In Hana call 248-7801, Lanai 5656722, and Molokai 553-9086.

in Hana on organic farm

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20) In confrontations with literal-minded, scientific pragmatists who challenge me to try to justify or prove astrology’s relevance, I say: “No, you’re quite right. It’s all bullshit.” Then I move on. Follow my example, please, Gemini. Too many people this week will invite you to throw yourself at brick walls. Astrological influences might make you perversely inclined to try it, even though you know the outcome ahead of time. Resist them. None of these walls are coming down; your bones will break first. Keep your body and ego unbruised. Politely turn down those goads, and walk away.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22) Be careful. The person who’s trying to show you off is the kind of idiot who walks around with his cat on a leash.

Get away, fast, Cancer. This person has a really distorted view of reality, one that couldn’t possibly benefit you. And they’re beyond your help. Don’t say I didn’t warn you about this one. If you persist in associating with the freak in question, you’re basically volunteering to be the cat on the leash. It’s not as bad as being the person who thinks that’s a good idea, but it’s not much better, either. Instead, please scratch their eyes out, run away, or both.

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22) Only Sagittarians despise the thought of being stuck in prison more than you do, Leo. Although their longing for freedom is quite different from yours (as are their escape methods), the result is the same; neither of you can abide feeling trapped for very long. I’m not going to make a case for how great imprisonment is. However, sometimes it’s imposed on you not for the protection of others but for your own safety and well-being. That’s the case this week. Left to your own devices you could really screw things up at the moment. If someone’s sheltering you (hint: it might feel like smothering), let them. You can shrug off their care next week, when your lack of foresight won’t mess up your whole life.

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22) Most Virgos I know are, at least a little, embarrassed to admit their sign. As if it’s disgraceful to be so efficient, energetic, dependable and clean. That’s because some lame and unscrupulous folk have gone to great lengths to shame you about your organizational skills or your fastidiousness (even that word has a negative feel to it). But that’s just so they don’t feel too bad about being such flaky slobs. Forget them. They’re pathetic and they know it. You’re not the least bit pathetic, though. Why don’t you know—deep in your bones—that?

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COVER STORY

Don’t be holistic this week. Yeah, yeah, I know I’m always asking you to remember how interconnected everything is, but at the moment that crap will only overwhelm you. If you consider the entire mountain of tasks you’ve taken on, you’ll just want to go to bed and forget the whole thing. Don’t you dare indulge this impulse, though. Even an extra half a day between the sheets could set you so far back that you’d never recover. Realizing that, you’d just spend weeks on end hiding under your pillows. Forget the mountain. It doesn’t matter. Instead, break what you’ve got to do into the smallest possible chunks and tackle—only even think about tackling—one at a time.

A public health message provided by The Maui AIDS Foundation.

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P.O. Box 11782 Lahaina

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This week you might feel like you recklessly dove to the deep-end bottom of the pool without taking a properly deep breath first. Short on air, what should have been a casual game—diving for rings with the kids—has become something fraught with desperation and panicked urgency. Relax. Freaking out will only exacerbate things. How can you possibly stay calm, you ask? Because, you’re actually fine. Sure, you’re operating without the comfort zone buffer that you’re used to, but you can still pull off your task anyway. The only way you’ll drown is if you flip out, so keep your cool and get the job done.

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Surf the Maui MLS Listings at www.barrybrownmaui.com Barry Lee Brown (R)

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AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18)

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LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22) Don’t expect to accomplish much or get anywhere this week. In fact, you’re doomed to spend the bulk of your time getting most of the way somewhere, then changing your mind and reversing direction, then repeating the whole process elsewhere. It’s almost impossible for you to be decisive or efficient right now; planetary influences virtually forbid it. So what? There’s nothing so important that it can’t be put off for a bit. If I were you, I’d postpone major responsibilities if I could. Meanwhile, I’d enjoy the silliness of your mental dancing (since you’ll be doing it whether you find it fun or not).

“we do all the work . . . so you can enjoy your yard”

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21) Keep your ears pricked for the “click.” This week you’re likely to experience several examples of that profound, subtle and almost mystical union with someone else (or, quite possibly, several someone elses). It could happen in conversation, artistic collaboration, during sex, or all three, or any number of other situations. It’s not that you’re likely to miss it when it happens, but you may not appreciate how special (and, remember, rare) it is, until it’s too late. Don’t do a Before Sunrise. Exchange numbers, make plans and dream. Sure, this could lead to disappointment. The other route, however, definitely will.

Jason Meyer 573-1920

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21)

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Everyone’s experienced that moment, hopefully many times, when a previously opaque and incomprehensible subject suddenly clicks into transparent clarity. The light dawns, as they say. This can, occasionally, be accompanied by embarrassment, if, say, this took one much longer than it ought to have. In other words, now that you know how short and simple the journey was, it’s humbling that it took you as long as it did. In case you hadn’t guessed, this week might feature one or two of these ego-crushing incidents. Don’t let it get to you, though (better late than never, right?). Spending too much time feeling stupid will just keep you from picking up your next clue, and start the whole damn cycle all over again.

If not now, when?

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CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19) The good news is that the slave drivers who were whipping you into a frenzy these past couple weeks will now tire of goading you on and pushing you past your limits. The bad news is that, of course, your efficiency will drop dramatically. Those who’ve come, recently, to expect insane quantities of high-quality productivity from you (including yourself) might be disappointed, or even put out. That’s bullshit, though. You deserve a break, a chance for all those lash-marks on your back to heal. If anyone complains, point to the mountain of accomplishment just behind you and tell them when your lazy-ass peers catch up, then they can resume their nagging, but not before.

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JANUARY 27, 2005

33

HOLOHOLOGIRL

BY SAMANTHA CAMPOS

Freddie Mercury is my new roommate On Wednesday, Sasha lost her voice. So after seeing a deliciously wicked Being Julia at the Castle Theater, we decided to go to Idini’s in Wailuku. We should’ve known something was up when there were two seats waiting for us at the bar. It was just too damn convenient. Then the guy next to me asked where we had just come from. And he was cute. And young. In a dive bar.

It was so weird.

Not long after, the young dude asked us what we did for a living. Then I asked him the same thing. Construction? Plumbing? Masonry?

“I’m an epidemiological specialist,” he said.

Oh. Sure, happens all the time. At first I thought he was lost, but he said he’d just bought a house down the street.

Undeterred, we stayed at Idini’s and began chatting with a table of nice gentlemen, one of whom insisted that I spoke Spanish. I politely told him that I didn’t. He continued speaking to me in Spanish, telling me what he thought when he first saw me and that he knows I’m lying about not being able to speak Spanish because I have a “tortilla face.”

“Um, excuse me,” I said. “Why are you calling me ‘tortilla face?’”

He explained that “tortilla face” is an expression used by Latinos when referring to someone with an unmistakable Hispanic appearance. I told him that unless he was going to call me “a hot tamale,” I didn’t want to hear any cultural food references to my visage.

Had I explained the rest of my ancestry, what would have been next? Escargot eyes?

Sauerkraut lips? Bangers-and-mash nose?

On Friday, BJ, Sasha and I went back to Idini’s. We said our hellos and hugged our newest favorite Wailuku bartender, Mike. We ordered our usual whiskeys and somebody sent over a bowl of nuts. Then the three of us noted that some cashews looked disturbingly like a key part of female genitalia. I tried to save one as a demo model for possible future instruction but like most men, I just left it there.

We were listening to some romantic ballads—was it Michael McDonald?—with some very prominent saxophone solos, which we enjoyed. But we all agreed that we don’t like music when it sounds like the sax is replacing vocals. Like with Kenny G. That somehow turned into a discussion of Zamfir, the pan flutist. And Yanni. Then Sasha said she’d do him. Yanni, that is.

We were incredulous.

“Hey, if he’s good enough for Krystal [Linda Evans] from Dynasty, then he’s good enough for me,” she said. “Sometimes you have to do guys ‘cause it’s funny.”

Then she presented her theory of “doing” hot celebrities—maybe Jude Law, Kelly Slater and Lenny Kravitz, for instance—and then throwing in a wild card, like Yanni. We weren’t necessarily buying it, so we moved on to discussing Jay Leno and big foreheads in new age music, which naturally led to discussion of John Tesh. The girls snickered.

“Whatever, I did him,” I said.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about getting a dog. But I’m kind of a commitment-phobe at the moment. So BJ suggested a hamster. But hamsters are kinda like gerbils and that’s really gay.

Not “gay” in the ole urban myth of Richard-Gere-and-the-gerbil-incident kind of way, but “gay” in the adult-woman-who-has-a-hamster-as-her-main-pet-is-a-freak kind of way.

“What about a rat, then?” asked BJ. Yeah, a rat. That’s kind of Adolescent Goth. I can dig that. But as I looked for the furry creatures section of the pet store, I passed a couple shelves with some very sad-looking Bettas.

And while most of the fish looked a bit gray and forlorn, one fish with dramatic red plume-like fins was rockin’ out in his small plastic jar. So I took him home to the Moroccan Bayou, where I will love him and pet him and love him and squeeze him and call him George. Actually, I think “Freddie Mercury” is more appropriate.

On Sunday evening, there was an Aloha ‘Oe party for Anna on the north shore. In an elegant guest cottage overlooking the ocean, 20 lovely ladies drank Cosmopolitans and wine, ate sushi and cheesecake, took Polaroids and waxed poetic about their favorite hair stylist.

Then Kirsten took a bunch of photos, even offering her camera—the one with the strap on—to anyone who wanted to capture a moment.

“Did she say strap-on?!” a couple of women said, giggling.

At one point, we all gathered around in the living room, as some women shared their experiences about and with Anna. How she’s changed their lives in some way. How she’s made so many women more beautiful. How she has such a nice ass.

“What will we do without you?” they cried.

“I don’t know,” said Anna, smiling sweetly. “You’re fucked.”

MTW

34

JANUARY 27, 2005

CLASSIFIED

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