15.07 The Throwdowns To Earth, August 4, 2011, Volume 15, Issue 7, MauiTime

AUGUST 4, 2011 ✚ VOLUME 15 ✚ ISSUE 07 ✚ FREE

THE THROWDOWNS TO EARTH Go-big gumption aside, T-downs-in-the-raw get a thumbs-up

pg. 10

PLUS! The Deal on

Oprah’s Private Road Pg. 9

PPH PHOTO HOT OTO O BY Y TTONY TON ONY ON Y NOVAK N VA NO VAK K - CL CCLIFFORD LIFFFO FORD D

2 AUGUST 4, 2011

Contents VOLUME 15

✚

THIS WEEK’S QUESTION: In a throwdown, what’s your weapon of choice?

Editor: Anthony Pignataro (808) 283-1308 / anthony@mauitime.com @apignataro on Twitter My own big mouth Associate Editor: Anu Yagi (808) 264-8039 / calendar@mauitime.com @anuheayagi on Twitter The Deathly Hallows Proofreader: Dina Wilson Words Interns: Keo Eaton, Anna Such Contributors: Caeriel Crestin, Jory John, Ben Lowenthal, Avery Monsen, Ron Pitts, Chuck Shepherd, Sara Tekula, Ynez Tongson, Barry Wurst II

ISSUE 07

5 NEWS & VIEWS It’s baseball and debt fears in Coconut Wireless this week. Then Quizunderstood asks about a late supervisor. News of the Weird sees a white witch doctor. Eh Brah! wants local art. There’s a new guy at the fair in Mauisphere. And Anthony Pignataro tells the tale of Oprah’s Private Road.

10 FEATURE STORY Anu Yagi talks story with The Throwdowns, who have gotten so big that they’re celebrating the release of their first full-length CD with a concert at the MACC.

Photographer: Sean Michael Hower mauiweddingmedias.com / howerphotography.com

Graphic Designers: Amy Mendolia, Christina Tarleton Advertising Executive: Brad Chambers (808) 283-3260 / brad@mauitime.com Switchblade, of course General Manager: Jennifer Russo (808) 280-3286 / jen@mauitime.com @jenrusso on Twitter Tequila bottle Administrative Executive: Judy Toba (808) 244-0777 / judy@mauitime.com Liverwurst sandwich Administrative Assistant: Jennifer Brown Web Design: Linear Publishing Publisher: Tommy Russo (808) 283-0512 / tommy@mauitime.com @tommyrusso on Twitter Camera

13 FOOD & DRINK Jen Russo dines in New Orleans. Then she dishes some fresh Foodie News.

17 A&E Anu Yagi mashes up Damned Yankees, All My Sons and Poi Dogs. Ben Lowenthal scores LCD Soundsystem.

18 Film Critique Barry Wurst II says The Change-Up doesn’t know what it wants to be.

19 Film Capsules/Listings

The New

20 THIS WEEK’S PICKS There’s a cordage workshop at Maui Nui Botanical Gardens, a Hiroshima commemoration at UHMC, Maui Roller Girls at Moose’s and native birds at Makawao Library.

MauiTime is published every Thursday by MauiTime Productions, Inc. Its contents are Copyright Š 2011 by MauiTime Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Subscriptions are available at $70 per year. Reproduction or use without permission is strictly prohibited.

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No person may, without written permission of MauiTime, take more than one copy of each weekly issue. All opinions expressed throughout MauiTime are those of the authors and not necessarily the same opinions as MauiTime Productions, Inc. and MauiTime.

22 Da Kine Calendar 23 Grid

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4 AUGUST 4, 2011

NEWS&VIEWS

Coconut Wireless

Talk of the Island

BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO

NA KOA IKAIKA LOSES, LOSES THEN WINS! First the bad news: The Na Koa Ikaika professional baseball team is on an eight-game losing streak, having lost most recently (on July 31) to Jose Canseco’s Yuma Scorpions 12-4.

And the really bad news: in early July the 2nd Circuit Court ruled that Hawaii Baseball LLC, the Californiabased owner of the Na Koa Ikaika team, owes $12,259.53 to Pacific Radio Group (PRG). The money is mostly fees for broadcasting the team’s first 11 games this season--money PRG said the team never paid it.

Look, disagreements over contracts and fees happen all the time in business. But the real pain here came from PRG attorney Keri Mehling’s court documents, which stuck a knife in the heart of everyone who considers Na Koa Ikaika Maui’s “home team.”

The money quote appeared in the July 20 Maui News: “Hawaii Baseball is a foreign entity incorporated in California,” Mehling wrote in court filings. “Other than conducting games on Maui during the existing short season, Hawaii Baseball has virtually no contacts with Maui or Hawaii.”

Ouch! That hurts more than Canseco’s Scorpions. Nonetheless, there is good news for Na Koa Ikaika fans-historic news, in fact.

This week the team announced their newest acquisition: pitcher Eri Yoshida, formerly of the Chico Outlaws. This is really big news not because Yoshida is Japanese, but because she’s a chick.

“Yoshida, 19, made headlines and impressed the baseball world last summer when she became the first female to play professionally in Japan and the U.S.,” stated a joint Na Kao Ikaika/ County of Maui press release sent out July 28. “Equipped with a sidearm knuckleball that is considered almost un-hittable when she is on, she has played for the Kobe Cruise 9 of the Kansai League in Japan and then in the Arizona Winter League in the U.S. in 2010 and 2011 and also with the Chico Outlaws last year. She also became the first female pro player to have a hit and an RBI in a professional men’s league and her jersey and bat from the

2010 Chico Outlaws were requested by, and are displayed in, the National Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, New York. She began playing

looked very good against us last week and has worked hard and improved a lot this past year.”

Yoshida apparently agrees. “I will

Cheer up, losers!

PHOTO BY SEAN MICHAEL HOWER

baseball in the 2nd grade and credits Tim Wakefield as the inspiration for her 50 mph knuckleball delivered from her 5 foot 1 inch, 115 lb frame.”

Since Yoshida used to play for Na Koa Ikaika Manager Garry Templeton, the transition should be pretty straightforward. “I am excited to have Eri back pitching forr me again,” Templeton said in the news release. “She

always be grateful to the Chico Outlaws for the opportunity they gave me last season and this summer too, but now I will try my best for Maui,” she said in the news release. “I am excited to play in Maui for Mr. Templeton and with my old teammates and also because we have family ties to the island and I am very comfortable there.” there

TWEET of the WEEK “Lost a cockatoo? It’s flying around my Wailuku neighborhood—white with a pink tinge and head feathers.”

-@JillEngledow (Maui author Jill Engledow), July 31

DEBT DISASTER AVERTED? That is, of course, a trick question, since in all the presidential and congressional squabbling over the last few months over budget cuts, this nation never teetered on the precipice of catastrophic debt default. Even if there hadn’t been an 11th hour budget deal struck, Yale law and political science professor Bruce Ackerman wrote a very compelling Slate.com essay showing that the U.S. Treasury still would have been able to pay the $29 billion debt interest payment that is due in August with the $172 billion in revenue that’s coming in this month.

Which means that orange-skinned Speaker of the House John Boehner and the raucous Tea Party caucus that both brought him to power and now complicates his exercise of that power have needlessly scared the hell out of the American people. But hey, isn’t this what our government officials do best?

Where would we as a nation be without our elected officials telling us to cower before the threat of Communists, nuclear war, terrorists, government workers, corporate CEOs, climate change, scientists, religious zealots and/or health care reform? To the suits in Washington, whipping up fear IS governing.

But at least, if the debt bomb did blow us all sky-high, we had reliable Governor Neil Abercrombie’s hand at the tiller. “Together we are taking a sober look at the possibility of a federal default and the impact it could have on the State of Hawai`i,” Abercrombie said in a July 28 news release. “We have a sound plan and are prepared to keep our economy stable. We are carefully managing the state’s finances and our local banks are ready to step forward if the need arises.”

Hopefully, we will never know what Abercrombie meant by the term “sound plan” and his assurance that banks would “step forward” (the release offered no details). Because I can pretty much guarantee that it would have scared us. ■ anthony@mauitime.com + @apignataro To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1507n1

AUGUST 4, 2011 5

NEWS&VIEWS

QUIZunderstood 1. On July 25, former Maui County Supervisor Richard I. C. “Pablo� Caldito

Richard I. C. “Pablo� Caldito

HAWAII LIQUOR

died at the age of 98. Which of the following statements about Caldito is NOT true?

A. Caldito was the first Filipino-American to win an election on Maui.

B. He was the first Filipino-American to win an election as a Democrat in United States history.

C. After leaving office, Caldito owned a piece of the Kihei Maui II development.

D. In 1963, while between terms as a member of the Maui County Board of Supervisors, Caldito was prosecuted on gambling charges.

E. Caldito never earned a high school diploma.

F. Orignally from Bacarra, Ilocos Norte in the Philippines, Caldito moved to Maui as a boy in 1922.

G. In 1998, Filipino Image Magazine named Caldito one of 20 Outstanding Filipino-Americans.

2. In July bankruptcy filings in Hawaii: A. Increased 34.1 percent from the number of filings in July 2010.

B. Decreased 22.3 percent from the number of filings in July 2010.

C. Didn’t move at all because everyone’s still poor.

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3. On July 30, The Maui News reported that 18 months after first asking for injection well tests in Lahaina, the Environmental Protection Agency is finally getting its wish. The reason for the delay is: A. Budget negotiations in Washington.

B. A near-consensus among biologists that nothing bad can happen from injecting treated wastewater into the ground in Lahaina.

C. Difficulty in getting former County of Maui officials to act.

See answers, page 29

Overheard â&#x20AC;&#x153;Hurry up, Dadâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; there are people walking behind us.â&#x20AC;?

-Little girl walking to restroom at Cool Cat Cafe in Lahaina, July 31

6 AUGUST 4, 2011

NEWS&VIEWS

NEWS OF THE WEIRD

BY CHUCK SHEPARD

IT’S A LIVING Thomas Heathfield was a well-paid banking consultant with a promising career in Maidenhead, England, but gave it up this year to move to South Africa and endure rigorous training as a “sangoma” (“witch doctor”). After five months of studying siSwati language, sleeping in the bush, hunting for animal parts, vomiting up goats’ blood and learning native dances, Heathfield, 32, was given a new name, Gogo Mndawe, and is now qualified to read bones and prescribe herbal cures (among the skills expected of sangomas by the roughly 50 percent of South Africa’s population that reveres them). He admitted concern about his acceptance as a white man calling out African spirits, “but when [the people] see [me] dance, perhaps those questions go away.”

CULTURAL DIVERSITY “Hundreds” of blondes paraded through Riga, Latvia, on May 28 at the third annual “March of the Blondes” festival designed to lift the country’s spirits following a rough stretch for the economy.

More than 500 blondes registered, including 15 from New Zealand, seven from Finland and 32 from Lithuania, according to a woman who told Agence France-Presse that she was the head of the Latvian Association of Blondes.

Money collected during the event goes to local charities.

SNAKES ON A TRAIN A clumsy smuggler (who managed to get away) failed to contain the dozens of king cobras and other snakes he was transporting from Ho Chi Minh City in Vietnam to Hanoi (probably to be sold illegally to restaurants). After panic broke out on the train and police were called, the snakes were collected and turned over to a sanctuary. Upscale restaurants can charge as much as the equivalent of $500 for a meal of king cobra, beginning with the selection of the snake, and having it killed at tableside, on to a serving of a snake’s-blood appetizer. In one survey, 84 percent of Hanoi’s restaurants were serving illegal wild animals of some sort, including weasel, monitor lizard and porcupine.

THE ENVY OF U.S. TELEVANGELISTS In July, after India’s Supreme Court ordered an inventory, a Hindu temple in Trivandrum was found to contain at least $22 billion worth of gold, diamonds and jeweled statues given as offerings to the deity by worshippers over several centuries. The wealth was until now believed to be the property of India’s royal family, but the Supreme Court ruling turns it over to India’s people. Authorities believe the “$22 billion” figure is conservative.

LATEST RELIGIOUS MESSAGE The notorious Santa Croce monastery in Rome was closed in May (and converted to an ordinary church) on orders from the Vatican following reports about Sister Anna Nobili, a former lap-dancer who taught other nuns her skills and who was once seen lying spread-eagled before an altar clutching a crucifix.

Santa Croce was also an embarrassment for its luxury hotel, which had become a mecca for celebrities visiting Rome.

THE TALENTED MR. ZHOU Zhou Xin, 68, failed to get a callback from the judges for the China’s Got Talent TV reality show in June, according to a CNN report (after judge Annie Yi screamed in horror at his act). Zhou is a practitioner of one of the “72 Shaolin skills,” namely “iron crotch gong,” and for his “talent,” he stoically whacked himself in the testicles with a weight and then with a hammer.

Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations, 200 words or less (which we reserve the right to edit), changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent, to “Eh Brah!” c/o MauiTime, 33 N. Market St, Ste. 201, Wailuku, HI 96793 or send an e-mail to

ehbrah@mauitime.com

SO MY HUSBAND and I were out enjoying a beautiful evening while wandering from shop to shop, perusing art here and there. And then we came into your gallery. We asked you about a piece of art that was hanging there. You talked briefly about it. Then we asked you if the artist was a local. “None of our artists are local,” you said. “Our artists are credentialed.” What? I asked if you were serious, and then you started backpedaling. Look, you don’t belong on Maui. Please take your hippy hair and your pretentious bitch attitude and go work someplace else. We were in the market to buy, but after your attitude, we walked out. Do you realize what kind of commission you missed? But hey, no worries: we took our business to another gallery across the mall where they treated us—and Maui—with respect. ■

CUTTING-EDGE RESEARCH It’s good to be an Arizona State University student, where those 21 and older can earn $60 a night by getting drunk.

Psychology professor Will Corbin, operating with National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism grants, conducts studies of drunk students’ memories, response times and decision-making processes through extensive questioning— after he has raised their blood-alcohol level to precisely 0.08 percent (which Arizona regards as presumed-impaired for drivers). Students are served one type of vodka cocktail, three drinks’ worth, in a bar-like room on campus, and after 15 minutes to let the alcohol be absorbed, the questioning and testing begin. At the end of the night, taxis are called for the students.

Illustration by Ron Pitts mauiartistronpitts.com

NOT READY FOR PRIME TIME Ryan Letchford, 21, and Jeffrey Olson, 22, were arrested in Radnor, Pa., in July after they had broken into a police van for the purpose of taking gag photos of themselves as if they were under arrest.

However, the men somehow locked themselves inside the van, and neither they nor a friend they had called to come help could figure out how to open the doors. Finally, they were forced to call 9-1-1. Police arrived, unlocked the van, arrested the men, and locked them back up—inside a cell. ■ chuck@mauitime.com

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AUGUST 4, 2011 7

NEWS&VIEWS

MauiSphere

LOCAL PLUGS

BY JEN RUSSO

NEW KIHEI PARK Kihei just got a little greener. Last Friday was the official grand opening of the first phase of the town’s new 44-acre park. The South Maui community started asking for a park in the late 1980s, and Mayor Alan Arakawa said this has been the work of four administrations now.

“The park is next to Kihei Elementary School,” Arakawa said. “This county park was placed next to the state-run school so the students at the school would have the opportunity to have physical education programs and would be able to go directly from their school to the park safely.

It should also be noted that the park would not have many of its amenities without the extreme generosity and dedication of the Kihei community.”

This first phase is makai of Piilani Highway near both Kihei Elementary and Lokelani Intermediate. The landscaped 20 acres consists of a soccer/utility field, a baseball field, night lighting, restrooms, concrete benches, tables, grilling pits and a parking lot.

Vania Jerome were the project leaders for this fundraiser that was organized by the academy’s National Honor Society students. The Maui Prep Academy has 188 students in grades K through 12, and all middle and upper school students are required to complete a minimum of 10 to 25 hours of community service each year.

Rock Hard For Good

mately 95,000 folks pouring into the War Memorial property in Kahului during the fair’s four days. Still, Silva hopes to increase attendance with the improving economy.

“We are looking at starting a ‘stir fry’ event this year,” Silva said. “This event will feature our Maui Farmers and their locally grown products. Thanks to our hard working Managing Director Sherri Grimes, the ‘Healthy Baby’ contest will return to the Maui Fair this year. My personal goal is to listen to our community on what the community wants to see at the Maui Fair.”

The event requires hundreds of volunteers for the food vendor booths to the orchidland, livestock and poultry exhibits. Silva will continue to work closely with Grimes.

“After so many years working on this amazing event, I am so grateful to the volunteers, community service and nonprofit groups, chairpersons and committees, Board of Directors, various state and county agencies, sponsors and the many other gracious supporters who are responsible for making the Maui Fair come alive,” Grimes said.

Looks like a space station, eh?

Goodfellow Bros., Inc. constructed the park, which cost about $11 million to build. That price does not include an estimated $200,000 worth of playground equipment, including the rubber safety surface, which was donated and installed by Pyramid Project Management, the Grand Wailea and other volunteers. Maui Land & Pineapple Co. also donated park trees.

“We are so pleased to provide this special place where families can gather to be creative, have fun and create lasting memories,” said Matt Bailey, Grand Wailea Managing Director.

Although this first phase is complete, there is still much work to be done to complete all 44 acres of the park. Tentative plans include adding more soccer and other playing fields, two more playgrounds, a pavilion, youth center, outdoor tennis, basketball courts and a gymnasium.

MAUI STUDENTS HELP TSUNAMI SURVIVORS When Maui Preparatory Academy National Honor Students contacted Jill Holley, the Sales and Marketing Director at Hard Rock, about hosting an all-ages concert at the Hard Rock Cafe Maui to raise money for Japanese tsunami survivors, she was quick to agree. “Hard Rock was super happy to see these students come together from all over the island for a philanthropic cause,” she said. “They reached out to us because they knew they could count on Hard Rock.”

Devon Bloss, graduating Maui Prep senior, and teacher

8 AUGUST 4, 2011

Students have participated in a wide variety of projects like volunteering at the Maui Marathon, participating in the American Cancer Society’s Relay for Life, organizing Christmas gift drives for underprivileged families in West Maui, planting native trees, protecting native bird habitats and working with animals at the Maui Humane Society. This is the first concert they’ve planned at the Hard Rock and the students worked with Holley to advertise, produce t-shirts, host a silent auction and collect a recommended donation at the door for Japan’s tsunami victims.

The stars of the show were the bands that rocked the house for the cause: “B Block” Rock from Seabury Hall; Better than Nothing from Lahainaluna High; 7 AM from Maui Preparatory Academy; the student ensemble XYZ Affair; and Camp Savage, a Lahaina local band. These students entertained a standing room only crowd at this highly successful event that generated more than $2,500.

“The students chose the charity and knew exactly what they wanted to accomplish: raise money for the less fortunate in Japan,” said Holley. “The money was sent to Honolulu American Red Cross with a direction to aid the Japanese tsunami disaster.”

FAIR GETS NEW DIRECTOR Roy Silva has long been a fan of the Maui Fair. “My memories with the Maui Fair started with riding my bike there in the early 1960s to help my dad at Mr. Iwao Sato’s live fish booth in the Better Living Tent,” he said. “I marched in the parade as a scout in 1966 and 1967, and again in 1971 as a St. Anthony High School ROTC cadet. As I got older, I worked in the candy apple booth and the corn-on-the-cob booth. So the Maui Fair holds a special place in my heart and for my family.”

For that reason, it’s fitting that the 89th annual Maui Fair gets a new perspective with the appointment of Silva as its new director. He replaces Karey Anne Oura Kapoi.

Silva spent the last eight years as the Fair’s Parade Chairperson. His new job will have him lead community relations and outreach as well as offer creative and promotional concepts toward the overall vision of the fair.

There’s something for everyone at the Maui Fair and it’s one of the best attended events on island, with approxi-

Roy Silva: Candy Apple Connoisseur

The 2011 Fair will open with the traditional parade on Thursday, Sept. 29, and will continue with rides, food, entertainment and more through the evening of Sunday, Oct. 2.

The Maui Fair is an icon of family tradition. It attracts locals and visitors to enjoy an alcohol-free, smoke-free and drug-free family-oriented educational event that features multicultural food, first-rate entertainment and the E.K. Fernandez Fun Zone. There’s also horticulture, bonsai, livestock, homemaking, photo, art and educational exhibits and competitions. The unique and innovative products in the Commercial Exhibitor and Hawaii Products & Services Tents (formerly known as the Better Living and Arts & Crafts Tents) as well as amazing student achievements in the Annual Robo Tech Maui Expo & Competition continue to draw the young and old.

The Maui Fair is the primary source of funding for many of Maui’s nonprofit and community organizations. It relies entirely on corporate or local business sponsorships, local donations, and volunteers for support. Corporate Sponsorship packets are also available online for download.

“In today’s tough times we need somewhere to go with our family and friends and just ‘kick back,’” Silva said. “I invite the community to meet me at the fair and share their thoughts on how we can continue to grow and improve our community’s ‘Timeless Tradition.’” ■

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NEWS&VIEWS

Oprah’s Private Road

In the Land of O, the Yellow Brick Road runs from Kihei to Kula

BY ANTHONY PIGNATARO

A

ccording to Forbes, Oprah Winfrey is worth $2.7 billion.

The 57-year-old former actor became famous for her Oprah Winfrey Show (which ceased production in May) but still runs a vast media empire. She owns a production company (Harpo Productions), a cable network (OWN), a magazine (O), Oprah.com and the Oprah Radio satellite station. She also owns estates in Montecito, California and Fisher Island, Florida; houses in Lavallette, New Jersey, Douglasville, Georgia and Telluride, Colorado; and assorted properties on the islands of Antigua and Maui. The latter includes 100 acres in Hana, 1,000 acres Upcountry (which boasts a small, terribly exclusive 12-room bed and breakfast) and a four-mile road.

And not just any road, either: Oprah’s road is concrete and asphalt 12 feet across. Goodfellow Brothers paved it in December 2010. The road stretches from the water tank at Kealakapu Road near Piilani Highway in Kihei to Keokoa, near Haleakala Highway. It’s a road locals have been waiting for 40 years--a potentially golden road that could radically ease traffic congestion in Central Maui.

That is, if the public could use it, which it most certainly cannot. “The paved road, drainage swales and detention ponds will be privately maintained,” stated a June 2009 Drainage Report on the effects of paving the road prepared by Wayne I. Arakaki Engineer LLC for OW Ranch, LLC, (the initials reportedly stand for “Oprah Winfrey”) and kept on file with the Maui County Planning Department. “This is a private roadway and will not be open to the public.”

OW Ranch paid for the road. “It wasn’t cheap,” said OW Ranch agent Hugh Starr when asked how much it cost. He ultimately declined to provide a figure, and officials with both the county Planning Department and Haleakala Ranch said they either didn’t know or couldn’t provide the number (grading the road did require a

$34,520 bond, which county civil engineer Lance Nakamura said represented just a fraction of the grading costs).

According to Starr, the road lies entirely on Haleakala Ranch land,

easier,” though he added that the road doesn’t actually reach any dwellings owned by OW Ranch or Kamaole Ranch. “It was an existing ranch utility road,” he said. “The Department of

Oprah's Magical Road

ILLUSTRATION BY SCRAPPERS

which he said was the road’s main user. But he added that OW Ranch and Kamaole Ranch (which is owned

by Winfrey’s former personal trainer Bob Greene, who is also listed as a manager for OW Ranch) retain access rights to the road that dated back to OW Ranch's original purchase of the 1,000 Upcountry acres from Haleakala Ranch. Starr called the original dirt and gravel road “very rocky and dusty” as well as “dangerous,” which the grading permit and accompanying drainage report makes clear.

“We will paved [sic] approximately four miles of road 12 feet wide,” states the county drainage report. “Grades which is [sic] greater than 12 percent will be constructed out of concrete. We will construct drainage swales along the paved road, with plastic liner. All slopes will be graded at a 3:1 [ratio].”

Hugh Starr referred to the road as a “driveway” that “makes going in a lot

Water Supply, Maui Electric and Haleakala Ranch all use it.”

Rumors about the road have flown about the island for months. During a Jan. 11 Maui Planning Commission hearing on OW Ranch’s request to extend a permit for its Silver Cloud bed and breakfast in Kula, Chairman Jonathan Starr (no relation to Hugh) asked OW Ranch agents whether the road existed and if it tied into Winfrey’s Silver Cloud bed and breakfast.

Tom Welch, an attorney representing OW Ranch, Kamaole Ranch and Silver Cloud, said the road did not connect to the Upcountry bed and breakfast.

“Mr. Chairman, yeah, in I think it was 2003 [sic] when Kamaole Ranch LLC, an affiliated entity, bought the land, bought [a] thousand acres from Haleakala Ranch in this area,” Welch said during the hearing, according to the official minutes (a receptionist at

the Kahului law firm Mancini, Welch & Geiger said Welch was unavailable to comment for this story). “They negotiated with Haleakala Ranch to get an easement over an existing ranch road so that, so that there could be access down below... [T]he way it’s set up, and the way it finally turned out was, the ranch granted an easement for the personal use of the particular client.

And it’s over the ranch, it’s over an existing ranch road, and it allows them to, allows the client to use it from time to time subject to notice requirements.”

Curiously, at the hearing Welch also told the planning commissioners that “this is not a entire, entirely harmonious situation between the use of the ranch land for ranching purposes and the personal of use [sic] but it’s all worked out and that’s basically the situation.” When asked what Welch meant, J. Scott Meidell, an agent for the Haleakala Ranch, denied that any tension existed between Haleakala and OW Ranches. “There’s no disagreement over it at all,” he said.

Another curiosity: The original grading and grubbing permit application, dated June 22, 2010, indicated “OW Ranch LLC” was the property owner, with “Hugh Starr” listed as the agent. At some point that name was crossed out and the words “Haleakala Ranch Company” hand-written next to it. The new agent listed was Meidell.

“I don’t know why” the crossing out occurred, Meidell said. “But the actual landowner has to sign the permit, and Haleakala Ranch is the landowner.”

In any case, though the road is not visible from either Piilani Highway in Kihei or Haleakala Highway in Kula, Hugh Starr said members of the public still find their way to it.

It’s hard to monitor the road,” Starr said. “There’s some concern about the general public. It’s kind of a doubleedged sword because the road is very attractive to skateboards and joggers.

We have definite security issues.” ■ anthony@mauitime.com + @apignataro To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1507n4

AUGUST 4, 2011 9

THE

THROWDOWNS TO EARTH

Go-big gumption aside, the T-downs-in-the-raw get a thumbs-up By Anu Yagi

T

he Throwdowns came to my hospital room bearing a blister-packed toy mustache and a white wicker basket stuffed with gerbera daisies. It was November 2009 and the Mauibased band was on Oahu opening for The Fray and Panic at the Disco at Waikiki Shell, while I was at Kaiser Moanalua enjoying fever-induced hallucinations and my first rounds of chemotherapy for acute promyelocytic leukemia.

I hadn’t known the band for very long, so there was a tiny tense moment as everyone exchanged pleasantries to the click of the IV drip.

Then, cutely coy, bassist Kimo Clark asked me, “What is chemo, anyway?”

Suddenly, no one had their guards on duty (least of all sickly, mustached-me). Raucity ensued, and my nurses’ stern eyes betrayed their kindly bit tongues. See, youthful jubilance is uncommon in the “Quiet Zone” of the oncology wing; and four spunky band members by my bedside made for a scene that looked decidedly Make-A-Wish.

As a journalist, I have to remind myself that realness is the very reason we like to read—and write—about people because it affords a chance to connect with something in someone we might not otherwise know. And though I’d already seen The Throwdowns’ show— even interviewed and published a piece on the band—it took a toy mustache and a few raw moments for that cherished candidness to crystallize.

Actions being telling, I was moved that Erin Smith, Ola Shaw, Ian Hollingsworth and Clark—on their first whirlwind work-trip to The Gathering Place—would bother to pause from publicity appearances and reading freshly inked features about them in the Honolulu Weekly and (now) Star-Advertiser, just to pile into their rental van and navigate Honolulu highways to my hospital in the hills. And all this for a cub reporter who’d recently penned their consummate positivity as being “a tad insipid” and who anyway might be dead in a few days.

So in a way, it was a wish come true.

As a lover of stories, I was thrilled to experience the best kind of conte: a moment in which I was privy to a very real side behind a public image. They became (if they weren’t already) my friends, and so it’s been with heartfelt interest that I’ve had the chance to peek in on their progress these last few years.

T The Throwdowns (from left to right): Erin Smith, Kimo Clark, Ian Hollingsworth, and Ola Shaw.

Photos by Scrappers

10 AUGUST 4, 2011

wo years ago, we put their mugs on the cover for the same reason we’re doing so today. Not unlike most burgeoning bands, they’re big dreamers—with one exception: their keen attention to where, when and how they distribute their finely tuned tunes makes evident their mapping of the road to success is vigilantly paved more with conscientious efforts than passive hope. While “X” may mark the spot, it’s the dotted trail to treasure that matters, after all.

Before their colorful visit during my stay in Cancer Land, I’d only met The Throwdowns a few months prior, on-assignment for my second-ever cover story for MauiTime. Ahead of the release of their debut EP Don’t Slow Down (2009; re-released in 2010 under ADA/Warner), I first got to know the band at Kihei town’s Maui Wave Studio, tucked within the fluorescence of the industrial area above the entrance to Piilani Highway.

Relatively newly formed, they struck me as a fresh-faced group of go-getters who blithely professed they were finally, as Hollingsworth put it, “in the band of their dreams.” We popped a few beers and later

munched fried calamari at the South Shore Tiki Lounge (a “second home,” to Smith, who’s long “paid the bills” by gigging solo at Tiki et alia), and they expressed their feeling of how all they wanted to do was make good music—and make it big.

Like most bands, their style bespoke an eagerness to do the pop-culture thing, which has equaled to nothing necessarily cutting edge, but certainly on-point. Though marketing is a fickle, misunderstood bitch, The Throwdowns managed to tame her enough to earn national exposure and seemed to possess the awareness that resting on the laurels of one good thing wasn’t going to win any marathons.

Their Don’t Slow Down release at Wailea’s Mulligan’s on the Blue went on to be a precedent-setting success—a massive, allages affair (Maui’s notorious Liquor Commission notwithstanding) with free CDs and goodies for all in attendance—and the band’s gone on to flesh out their resume. In part, of course, by recording and producing their first full-length release, Legs of Our Own, due to debut this Saturday (August 6) at the Maui Arts and Cultural Center (MACC).

While they’ve tried to avoid playing-out with too much regularity, The Throwdowns have hopped around the Hawaiian chain—going from the Big Island to the Blaisdell, opening for big acts like Bad Brains, The English Beat, Train and Matisyahu.

They’ve even toured Smith’s native Toronto, and team-built by taking an icy “polar bear plunge” (the curious Canadian tradition of swimming in near-freezing water).

“We’ve been really lucky,” says Smith in a recent interview.

“We’ve done some really cool shiz. I think notable moments are different for different people in the band; [but] for me, I like to play, so the moments that stand out are the shows. Like, playing with Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros [and] Ima Robot—I love those guys, so that was really cool.”

Indeed, it’s cool to tag along with the likes of notables, but with their first full-length album on the eve of release, everything again circles back to the goal: “take over the world.”

So whether you love, hate or are indifferent to their musical style, you have to admire their gumption. And because their (or anyone’s) successes are not mutually exclusive of others, we would do well to cheer for The Throwdowns.

Of course, not everyone does (or arguably should). One curious piece to The Throwdowns puzzle is their haters’ insatiable ire—and how it’s festered since the onset with little give to the release valve. Very little actual critique has come of it, but it’s at least proof that if you’re pissing people off, you’re probably doing something right.

S

haw’s a madman behind the mixing board. You can see it in his eyes: a dark focus that’s crept up from a well within.

It makes sense, producing music is his schooled trade, after all—and it’s a legacy he’s kept up from his father.

Shaw’s quiet zeal tweaking dials and pushing buttons was the most intriguing thing to witness last October when The Throwdowns invited me to sit-in on their recording sessions at the MACC’s Castle Theater.

They wanted “big, concert-style acoustics” for their drum tracks, and though the concept of setting up shop at the MACC had never been done before, true to T-downs style, they made it happen.

So drummer Hollingsworth was positioned at center stage— banging unabashed—then shouting on an intercom to Shaw, Smith and Clark producing from a backstage green roomturned-makeshift studio.

“OK?” Nope. Try it again.

“OK?” Yep. Next song.

The band had just returned from a big show on Hawaii Island (where Shaw grew up), and had shipped home a vintage mixing board that belonged to Shaw’s father. While Hollingsworth mopped sweat between takes—and Smith and Clark talked story with an intruding reporter—Shaw remained relentless.

I left with a feeling as big as the percussion they were capturing, and couldn’t wait to hear the results.

I didn’t see The Thowdowns again until their Legs Of Our Own listening party early this summer; a swanky poolside event in Launiupoko. The guest list of close friends and industry peeps were there to have an advance-listen to the album, give the band feedback (on a worksheet) that would later determine track order

and singles—and to party. No holds barred, from the invitations to the table decorations (lime green gems anchoring white lilies in water; a precursor to the marketing campaign) to the open bar, they nailed it. I again felt a feeling of grandness—their music was everything you could hope for—and witnessed the emergence of a meticulous and matured T-downs.

At the Aug. 6 release, we can expect the live set to sound very close to book.

Fans of Don’t Slow Down will be pleased to see that the hit song “Kihei Town” is back—this time as a remix—as is “Stolen Car.” While relying more on electronic engineering and loops,

“We just try to get it to as many people as possible using the team that’s available to us,” says Smith. “Who? Lawyers, social media people—then us, rolling up T-shirts ourselves with elastic bands.”

We continue to talk about a mercurial record industry in flux, about surfing and parenthood and who of the bunch has the worst B.O. (Clark, which kinda surprised me, but okay).

A half-eaten red velvet birthday cake sat on a primary-colored keiki table belonging to Hollingsworth’s little girl. It celebrated Shaw’s and Hollingsworth’s marking of another ellipse around the sun, and could perhaps be a tasty testament to how all our

What I’ve found most winning about The T-downs is when they’re strippeddown to the real, hardworking people behind the music. Instead of lost to the whitewash of pomp and fancy, their raw aspiration’s revealed and saturates them in color.

Legs Of Our Own also incorporates more island-style reggaeish faces are tauter with age. rhythms than we’ve heard of their previous efforts (for example, With knees to my chin, I assumed a seat at a stool made for the track “Stay HI” features Marty Dread), and tracks like “The the child’s table, so I could stay within help-yourself distance. I’m Way We Walk” and the robotic syncomessy like that. I think (at least, I hope) pation of songs like “Warrior” show the we all are—even if just a little.

THE THROWDOWNS band’s exploring new stylistic territory.

Shaw’s off to catch some shuteye beLegs of Our Own CD release concert “We tend to play live with a lot fore a 6am paddle to Lanai (I find this apof samples and stuff,” Smith says. Featuring Marty Dread, MOTHxp, Kimie and ropos because last time, he was training Lily Meola “There’s sort of a modern edge to it.” for the Honolulu Marathon). Clark, too, (Saturday) Aug. 6, 5pm doors open/6pm “We’re experimenting with sound,” has to leave to get home to his wife and show; $20/$25 adds Hollingsworth. son. The rest of us stay up talking about Yokouchi Pavilion/A&B Amphitheater, MACC The press has continued to take typical band-interview stuff. Influences.

One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-7469; note. Even Los Angeles’ KROQ—the Songwriting. Challenges. mauiarts.org / thethrowdowns.com station responsible for breaking bands Smith’s lounging in a swiveling, cir@TheThrowdowns on Twitter like Sublime and No Doubt, and “a bacle-shaped microfiber recliner. Cheetah rometer of what’s happening in LA,” as Smith says—has been plugging the upcoming CD release on-air.

A

side from drums recorded the Castle Theater, Legs Of Our Own was made in the band’s studio, on the ground floor of the Westside home Hollingsworth built with his own hands. Painted purple and splattered with neon from drumstick brushes, the band’s practiced a few times a week for the last year in the space, and the walls echo its well-loved wear.

Last week, I sat down with the band for a little catch-up, in the sitting room outside their studio. Again, The T-downs are on the cusp of a big CD release bash and—while I’ve had myriad mustache-moments with the band these last two years—I wanted to find out what has or hasn’t changed.

The answer? Not much. They are, as we all are, just a little further down the road of their journey.

Again, we pop a few beers and the band tells me their mantra, how “it’s all about making good music,” and their hope for successes that would follow.

They’ve returned to indie producing because, Hollingsworth says, “We can do it better ourselves.”

“It’s interesting,” says Smith of the traditional record deal route. “There are big dogs we know who are telling us, ‘You don’t want a record deal. Everyone we know is trying to get out of record deals right now.’ That’s the time we fall into. It becomes up to us to pave our way. Which is cool because we’re smart kids—creative and innovative, I think.”

Regardless it’s work, and it isn’t always easy or glamorous— they’re still folding their own band T-shirts and tacking up their own concert posters.

print, cowl-collared dress, a red wine glass bending back her wrist in a thoughtful way. Hollingsworth’s in a T-shirt and board shorts plucking effortlessly at a guitar.

This scene stands somewhat in contrast to their latest marketing campaign: a highly scrubbed visage of the band in a clinically all-white room augmented by lime green accessories.

It’s the trappings of pop-stardom-seeking and I get it, though it doesn’t speak to the band I’ve come to know.

Don’t mistake me—it’s a fine collection of imagery—and I get the concept. Visually, I can see how it’s meant to represent their act— one that’s so well-thought-out it borders on being overwrought.

“Look, we just wanted to wear a lot of white and some green shoes—that’s all,” Hollingsworth says, laughing.

His sentiment is exactly the thing I like—and like about the T-downs. They do what they like and like what they do, on legs of their own (if you will).

But over the years, what I’ve found most winning about The T-downs is when they’re stripped-down to the real, hardworking people behind the music. Instead of lost to the whitewash of pomp and fancy, their raw aspiration’s revealed and saturates them in color; with the taste of birthday cake, a twinge of hardearned B.O. and the knowledge that sometimes serious business requires the lightheartedness of a toy mustache. ■

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AUGUST 4, 2011 11

12 AUGUST 4, 2011

FOOD&DRINK

NOLA Dining, Maui Style

BY JEN RUSSO

I

naturally gravitate towards restaurants like a compass needle points north. So when I was sling-shotted 7,000 miles across the US to the deep south in New Orleans (NOLA) without a second to research dining, I was unconcerned. No chance to run into old flames so far from the rock meant fewer awkward moments and more time to make out with vampires over Sazeracs while snacking on gator pupus. I knew I could wing it.

But then I started having the worst luck. I didn’t know what to order, couldn’t find the cuisine I wanted and got no help from the vamps. Then the GPS on My IPhone stopped telling how or where to go. Without my tech, I had to guide myself through southern dining in the French Quarter in analog.

Here’s what I did:

2. I know you have heard this before but it works: Eat Local After ordering five different crappy brown leafed salads, I got the idea that the whole city got the same bad shipment of pre-cut salad mix that sucked. Javier Barberi, a Southern boy and and GM at Pulehu, filled me in on the seasonals: “To-

PHOTOS BY JEN RUSSO

1. Bourbon Street is for the Dogs Bourbon Street is NOLA’s perennial street party, not just during Mardi Gras. The street closes to vehicles around 5pm and the beads start flying soon after, regardless of whether your top stays on. The cocktails flow “as long as someone is still drinking,” according to the numerous NOLA residents I asked. Keep yourself going on this street with carb and p protein staples: p pizza, Philly cheesheesesteaks and hot dogs.

The latter make their heir appearance rightt as the street closess at 5pm: from deep in the gut of NOLA, LA, the Lucky Dog hot dog carts begin in making a mass migration to Bourrbon Street, where e you will find one e parked aboutt every 50 yards..

Oysters Their buns are steamed hot and the dogs are huge, e, ready to walk down the street with you, in fact. Of course, there are plenty of condiments condiments. Just beware of the strap-on drinks and the free Monster cans passed out by hot chicks in the back of a truck.

matoes, green beans, okra, squash, sweet you need something a little stronger, NOLA potatoes, collards, cabbage, rutabaga, and is famous for its cocktail history. Their wasweet vidalia onions.” terfront marketplace, called the Riverwalk, The lesson here is eat what is not shipped includes the Southern Food and Beverage in. Seafood is caught wild right here in the Museum, where you can see the years of gulf or procured in the swamps. I ordered rum running, underground moonshine oysters at the Bourbon House and not only production of prohibition, aging barrels of were they divine, ne, the staff whipped out a bourbon and absinthe and map and showed wed me the like. One thing NOLA exactly where kep in their history has kept they were books is their commitment caught that day. to craft cocktails. Bottom Also, okra rules.. bo oms up. line: bott And crab meatss are stuffed in evvSpice up your life by eat4. Spic erything. Sweet et ing wh what you don’t know potato fries count nt This iis the home of creole as a veggie. Go for cooking, conand cajun c the gator, it’s on sider siderably different than the menu everyerycuis cuisines here. Emeril where and caught ught and Paula Deen have locally (haven’t you made their names fama seen swamp peomous on the Food Netmo o Pompan P work with southern wo cooking. While I saw plenty of sushi and Chinese, I couldn’t help but o that in the south? Imask why people eat tha a merse yourself in the diversity of the food m in the area and pay attention to the subtle flavors that surround you. Etoufee may ssound completely foreign but it’s crawfish over rice with a dark roux. The seasonings o a and sauce make it very different from the sshrimp and rice of the islands.

Creole is the result of the melting pot o of French, Spanish, Greek, Italian, Portu tuguese, Native American and African American cultures. It’s their version of our A Free Monster any one? “l “local food.” Jambalaya, crawfish etoufee, b bisques, oysters rockefeller, beignets and pecan pie are some of the most notable p ple?). ple?) Don’t be surprised a and recognizable elements of this cuisine by the th turtle soup--its a found on the tables in NOLA. delicacy, delica and not made with sea s turtles (they are 5. Let your ears lead your nose a protected prot species even While you wander around looking for in NOLA).

NOL The turtle soup restaurants, let your ears lead the way. is made mad with farm-raised This city is full of remarkable musicians cooter o or snapping turtle, on street corners, pubs and restaurants. and sometimes som the recipe The Eels and Submarines were playing includes a mixture of veal, at House of Blues one night, and although beef and turtle meat. that wasn’t my first choice for dinner, getting to hear live music was. Jazz bands 3. Join the Tea Party or have a cocktail on the corners serenaded every outdoor The Sazerac is the official cocktail of meal, and even lone trumpet players made NOLA, but it can put unwanted hair on a simple cup of coffee al fresca so much your chest. It’s rye whiskey, in an absinthemore memorable. ■ washed glass served neat with a twist. jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso Summer in the south means its 90 degrees with 90 percent humidity, and the only Got a hot food scoop? Contact Jen Russo at way to relieve that is with southern black 808-280-3286 or fax to 808-244-0446. brewed iced tea. Southern hospitality dictates they make big vats of it sweetened or To share or save this article, type: unsweetened. Whichever your preference, mt.hy.pr/1507d a lot of it comes served in Styrofoam cups. If

AUGUST 4, 2011 13

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FOOD&DRINK

Island Bites

FOODIE NEWS

BY JEN RUSSO

H

onu Seafood and Pizza is open! It must be my birthday because restaurateurs Mark and Judy Ellman and their lovely daughters Arianna Guarnier and Michelle Ellman have given me a gift in the form of another fun and fabulous Westside

empty cask and shake hard to extract the Bourbon thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been trapped in the wood.

The Honu Refresh was also fantastic: Kai Ginger Lemongrass Shochu, coconut water and Thai basil that is so refreshing it could be an alcoholic sports drink. Honu officially opened this past Monday and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re invited for lunch, dinner and cocktail hour located at 1295 Front St. in Lahaina,, 667-9390.

This Tuesday Capische is hosting an T An Antinori sunset wine dinner. Chef BriE an Etheredge will be designing five tremendous men courses in his distinctive Italian cuisine. Come meet one of the oldest win wineries in Italy, founded in 1385, which cont continues to innovate wines to this day.

Make Mak your reservations: 879-2224.

Chef Isaac Bancaco is at it again, C with a new farm to table menu for Aug. 7 to 13. For just $59 you can Aug be swooned s by local opulence from Anu Anuhea, Evonok, Otani, Waipoli Hydroponics Farm and much more.

Hydr Ther Sylvesterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s y Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sweet corn and miso

Lamb Riblets from Honu

Pizza, restaurant: Honu Seafood and Pizza, where the views take your breath away,, the menu is trendsetting and the cock-tail list puts us in awe. Executive cheff Keoki McKee and pastry chef Elizabeth h e McDonald put on quite a spread at the d soft opening sneak peeks on Friday and Saturday night. I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know what the he d Greeks were doing when they discovered rthat lamb and yogurt were a perfect pairing, but I think the Ellmans must have ve been there because every time they put it ust on the menu itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a little different but just as delicious. McKeeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lamb riblets are a mp superior meat loverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s appetizer, the plump carmelized meat clinging to the bone. The juicy lamb drips down my grip as I dip them in yogurt sauce and devour. But seafood is in the name of this restaurant and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not for show. Clams, mussels, shrimp, oyster, crab and fish all play a prominent part in the menu.

Testing the cocktail menu on Friday was tough work. Many were intriguing, bringing fresh juices, liquors and garnishes together in harmony. One of the standouts was the smoked julep with Jim Beam â&#x20AC;&#x153;Devils Cutâ&#x20AC;? Bourbon, Lagavulin Scotch, a touch of agave nectar and water in a highball with a generous branch of mint. I just met â&#x20AC;&#x153;Devilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cutâ&#x20AC;? recently, served neat down south by Beam Brand Ambassador Armando Zapata. It gets its clever name from being the opposite of the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Angels Share,â&#x20AC;? what distillers call the 20 percent or so that evaporates from a sealed wooden cask. To make â&#x20AC;&#x153;Devilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cut,â&#x20AC;? they put a small amount of water back into the

Inspired Bartender The Nationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Most

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bisque to start you off or ahi sashimi salad with blue basil from Evonok. Escobedo tomatoes are featured in the sage and gingerhoney-rubbed chicken, and Kahakuloafarmed Filipino perch and watanabe won bok combine in another entree. Bancacoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s knack for incorporating locally farmed goods is really showing off their summerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bounty. Reservations at 875-1234.

Congratulations are in order. Sam Treadway from Waikikiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Edition, who did not win the USBG Pina Colada Championships, has now won the USBG Nationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Most Inspired Bartender in Hawaii -- a Bombay Sapphire and and GQ magazine competition -- with his 11th Reviver. I was rooting for last years champ, Mauiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Delia Asada who made a Sapphireâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Hawaiian Elixer with Maui homemade noni juice and chili pepper water. Treadway will now head to Las Vegas to compete in the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Most Inspired Bartenderâ&#x20AC;? summit. Richard McLeod senior brand manager of Bombay Sapphire gin, says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a very important

milestone for Bombay Sapphire to support the USBG cultivation of undiscovered bartending talent. Many locally recognized mixologists would not normally have this invaluable opportunity to showcase their techniques on a national stage.â&#x20AC;?

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Also, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just another week or so until the streets of Kona become overrun with the 3rd Annual Don the Beachcomber Mai Tai Festival at the Royal Kona Resort, where our local bartenders will be competing for $10,000 from Bacardi for tthe best Mai Tai in all the land.

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Movers and Shakers: Charlie Seibert formally of Capische iin the Hotel Wailea is now a mixologist at David Paulâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Island Grill in Lahaina. a Jason â&#x20AC;&#x153;Cassâ&#x20AC;? Castle, formerly of MerriJ manâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Kapalua, can be found behind the m bar at Spago in the Four Seasons Resort. b A At the Fairmont Kea Lani, their signature rrestaurant Ko will undergo major renovattions for the next six months, reinventing iitself as Waileaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s newest world class destination restaurant. Look forward to sweepn iing curved walls, a floating shaded roof, a dynamic action bar and porcelain tile flooring. The renovations will be revealed iin February 2012. In the meantime, enjoy Koâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s menu from 5:30 to 9pm nightly at the Kea Lani restaurant.

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Fangbangers Delight: Since I did not get enough vampiric action in New Orleans, Ambrosia is picking up the slack by naming August Vampire Month. On Thursday Aug. 25 the Martini Lounge will magically transform into Shreveport Louisianaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Fangtasia, replete with music by DJ Del Sol. Shape shifters will be allowed. Dress appropriately yâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;all and leave your Fellowship of the Sun friends at home. In other vampire news, all Wednesday night movies (7:30pm) will be Vampire League Sanctioned, from Lost Boys to Bram Stokerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Dracula. â&#x2013; jen@mauitime.com + @jenrusso

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AUGUST 4, 2011 15

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A&E

So Many Ways To Play Another MauiTime A&E mashup

BY ANU YAGI

ALBUM OF THE WEEK

DOODLE DANDY

MILLER, MILLER ON THE WALL Maui OnStage presents “All My Sons” -- an ONO! (one night only) production (Monday) August 8, 6:30pm Iao Theater, Wailuku; free 242-6969; mauionstage.com Thanks to his mother’s alert reading, playwright Arthur Miller (Death of a Salesman; The Crucible) based his 1947 play All My Sons on an Ohio newspaper’s reportage of

DOGGIE STYLE Poi Doggie Contest (Sunday) August 7, 2-4pm Schaefer International Gallery Lawn, Maui Arts & Cultural Center, Kahului; $10 entry fee / free for spectators 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org Proud of your prize-worthy poi dog pup?

Prove your furry friend’s worth her/his weight in kibble by taking your mixed-breed (no pedigrees!) to the MACC’s Poi Doggie Contest this Sunday (August 7). Wondering what the heck a poi dog is? Well, colloquially

PHOTO BY ERIC ROLPH PHOTOGRAPHY. L-R APPLEGATE (STEVE HATCHER), LOLA (CYNDI DAVIS), YOUNG JOE (MARK BOLDEN)

Is that a Louiville Slugger in your pocket, or...

Maui Academy of Performing Arts presents “Damn Yankees” (Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays) August 5-21, 6:15pm gates / 7:30pm show Maui Tropical Plantation’s “Field of Dreams,” Waikapu; $25 adults / $22 seniors (62-years-old and better) / $18 students (18-years-old and under) 244-8760; mauiacademy.org Picture this: You’re knuckles-deep in a pile of Bruddah Willy’s famous BBQ baby back ribs and mound of homemade mac-and-cheese. Hot, sticky and savory, you’re taking your sweet time--even when sweets like mini caramel apples and fresh “Maui-sadas” lie ready and waiting. But you’re in no hurry because belly business is a game of inches (and you still haven’t ruled-out having another hot dog). Besides, you’re sitting in the bleachers of Maui Tropical Plantation’s “Field of Dreams” (the isle’s only outdoor theater), enveloped by the Waikapu breeze and a blanket (i.e. if you bring one), watching Maui Academy of Performing Arts’ professional production of Damn Yankees.

A family-friendly musical comedy set in 1950s Washington DC, Damn Yankees is a Faustian tale (based on a book by George Abbott and Douglass Wallop, with music and lyrics by Richard Adler and Jerry Ross) that follows the story of a rabid baseball fanatic who makes a pact with the Prince of Darkness in efforts to bring his beloved Washington Senators to victory against the New York Yankees.

“This is the first production of Damn Yankees on Maui in decades,” says MAPA--so they’re taking no shortcuts and “pulling out all the stops” to create an all-baseball-themed show. Home-run hits like “Shoeless Joe from Hannibal, MO” and “Whatever Lola Wants” are sure to fill audiences’ hearts with happy, hilarious song--as Bruddah Willy and friends take care of filling the rest.

a woman who’d informed the government that her own father had sold botched mechanical parts to the U.S. military during World War II. All My Sons was soon staged on Broadway (and ran for 328 shows), won Tony awards for Best Play and Best Direction of a Play, and was adapted for the silver screen in 1948 and 1987. However, the play’s criticism of our nation’s ethos landed Miller on the Hollywood blacklist during the Red Scare. (Are you humming the Pink Floyd lyrics, “Mother, should I trust the government / Mother, do you think they’ll try to

break my balls”? I am!)

This Monday (August 8), catch a live reading of Miller’s All My Sons, part of the Maui OnStage’s monthly ONO! (one night only) productions at the Iao Theater. “This classic 1940s drama about ethics versus survival” features fine thespians like Don Carlson, Jerry Eiting, Michael Pulliam, Jennifer Rose, Chris Rose, Jackie Shea and Barbara Sedano--and finer still is that the whole shebang is free (though donations to help keep the theater’s lights on are both needed and welcomed).

it means mongrel (in the best way); i.e. fauna ancestry that--like the process of poi-making--is all mashed up. Literally, poi dog also refers to a now-extinct species of Hawaiian pariah dog (it’s name being interchangeable with “pye dog” and “pi dog” you can see how the etymology ensued). In partnership with the Maui Humane Society (with support from The Pet Shop, Petco and ‘Ohana Pet Training), a variety of playful, canine-centric contests will help determine the day’s big wieners in categories including Most Mixed-Up, Dog/Owner Look-Alike, Ugliest Mug, Best Howl, Best Trick and more.

This wag-worthy shebang ties into the Schaefer International Gallery’s current “Poi Dog” exhibition, featuring provocative raced-based works--that “approach the concept of multi-ethnic roots and personal insights into individual histories while investigating ancestry, racial barriers and identity”--created by five renowned Valley Isle artists: Pat Masumoto, Darrell Orwig, Nancy Skrimstad, Michael Takemoto and Sidney Yee. While the doggie style show’s a one-off event, you can check out the art exhibit Wednesdays through Sundays, through August 20, 11am-5pm. ■

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LCD SOUNDSYSTEM This is Happening (Virgin 2010) LCD Soundsystem’s last album is a great collection of long, radio-unfriendly songs. All but one song clock in at over five minutes. Ironically, the longest track “You Wanted a Hit” is over nine minutes long. The introductory part of the opening number, “Dance Yrself Clean,” is so long that many a quick single would be over and done before the song finally blasting off into a funky, synth-laden dance track (it’s worth the wait). The length of these songs allows the band to unfold each song deliberately. Their repetitive tracks with plenty of percussion from beat machines, handclaps, cowbells also makes the album fresh harvesting grounds for creative DJs looking for a good re-mix. Lead singer, James Murphy, has a high screeching voice and many of his songs are a stream of consciousness making little sense. “Pow Pow” is exemplary. The near-spoken word has been mastered by the Talking Heads, and that makes this song sound dated. In addition to the big percussion and heavy synth, the band will occasionally rock. “All I Want” is a respite from the funky, artsy, dance parade. LCD Soundsystem serves up a fine rock n’ roll song with soaring guitars and soft backup singers. “Home” rounds out the album nicely. It’s nuanced, long, and has layer upon layer of sythns. At the same time, Murphy is not a screeching poet in this one and sings a decent tune. Murphy said that This is Happening is the band’s final album, which is too bad. -Ben Lowenthal All albums reviewed in this space are available at Maui’s only record store, Requests (10 N. Market St., Wailuku, 244-9315)

AUGUST 4, 2011 17

FILM

Sentimental Yuk Fest The Change-Up doesn’t know what it wants to be

BY BARRY WURST II The Change Up

★★★★★

Rated R/105 min

M

itch Planko (played

by Ryan Reynolds) is a responsibility-free ladies’ man and a total slob who, in the words of his disapproving dad (Alan Arkin), “never finishes anything.” Mitch’s best friend Dave (Jason Bateman) is a hard working lawyer with a bored wife (Leslie Mann) and three children; Dave wishes he could change places and live a care-free existence like Mitch and, one night, while they both urinate into a magical fountain (yes, you read that right), their souls swap bodies. Now, Mitch must take on domestic chores while Dave is both thrilled and repelled to literally live vicariously through his best friend.

The scene when Bateman is changing a diaper and the baby violently (and graphically) poops into his mouth was when I knew the movie wasn’t going to work for me. I like a good raunchy comedy but this is less like Bridesmaids and more like Van Wilder. There are some good laughs but it’s more foul than funny and doesn’t know whether it wants to be

a sentimental parable or a filthy yuk fest.

The two leads are at their best when playing their initial characters, as Bateman is better being a reactive straight man and Reynolds is in his element as a care free wild man. Both have been solid in other roles both comedic and dramatic but both are slumming it here (though Reynolds is much better here than in Green Lantern). The script relies too much on profanity for easy laughs and scenes involving the making of a porn film and shaving one’s genitals don’t mix with the “tender” scenes involving the dysfunctional families of both Dave and Mitch.

Mann is outstanding once again, adding so much depth and emotion to a thankless role but she and Olivia Wilde (playing Bateman’s colleague) have roles that, when you think about it, are pretty sexist. There are also some jokes geared towards Japanese people that felt alarmingly racist, even in a non-PC comedy like this one. No holds barred is one thing, but how far do you go before it stops being funny?

The supernatural angle that propels the story is supposed to remind us of Big but the magic fountain is more in line with the similarly idiotic When in Rome. The plot line involving the disapproving Dad completely wastes Arkin and

I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.

many jokes, like the big reveal on “Tatiana,” are too mean spirited to be funny.

Bateman and Reynolds are both fine actors but their casting short changes the

SEAN MICHAEL HOWER

high-concept premise. If it were, say, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Robert Downey Jr. swapping souls, you’d have a wild movie of two opposites struggling to impersonate one another. When it’s the star of The Proposal and Teen Wolf Too, you know things can’t go too haywire, because the actors are appealing but safe choices for their roles.

Basically a hard-R take on the “body-swap” movies of the late 80’s, there are some very funny one-liners and isolated moments but this pales completely next to Bridesmaids.

This may be a nastier, more disgusting movie than Bridesmaids, but it plays more like a series of outtakes from The Hangover Part II than a great comedy.

Aside from Mann’s heartfelt work, it’s hard to care about these characters or the movie they’re in. It spends the first hour trying too hard to shock us, then piles on the sentiment and tries too late to engage our emotions. The movie would have been better and funnier if no one swapped souls and Bateman and Reynolds had to work out their problems without switching bodies and comparing penises. ■ barry@mauitime.com To share or save this article, type: mt.hy.pr/1507f

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FILM

Showtimes

WHERE AND WHEN TO WATCH WHAT

FRONT STREET THEATER

KUKUI MALL

900 Front Street, Lahaina, 249-2222 (Matinees) Captain America: The First Avenger (2D) PG13 - THU (12:45, 3:45), 6:45, 9:45. FRI (3:45), 6:45, 9:45. SAT-SUN (12:45), 3:45, 6:45, 9:45.

MON-WED (3:45), 6:45, 9:45.

The Change-Up - R - FRI (4:15), 7:15, 9:50. SATSUN (1:30), 4:15, 7:15, 9:50. MON-WED (4:15), 7:15, 9:50.

Crazy, Stupid, Love - PG13 - THU (12:50, 4:00), 7:00, 9:50. FRI (4:00), 7:00, 9:50. SAT-SUN (12:50), 4:00, 7:00, 9:50. MON-WED (4:00), 7:00, 9:50.

Friends with Benefits - R - THU (11:45, 2:15, 4:45), 7:20, 9:55 Horrible Bosses - R - THU (12:05, 2:35, 5:00), 7:35, 10:05 Rise of the Planet of the Apes - PG13 - FRI (4:05), 7:05, 9:45. SAT-SUN (1:15), 4:05, 7:05, 9:45. MON-WED (4:05), 7:05, 9:45.

1819 South Kihei Road, 1-800-326-3264 (Matinees: every day until 4pm) Captain America: The First Avenger (2D) PG13 - THU-TUE 11:00, 1:45, 4:30, 7:05, 10:00 Cowboys & Aliens - PG13 - THU-TUE 11:30, 2:05, 4:50, 7:30, 10:05 Crazy, Stupid, Love - PG13 - THU-MON 11:15, 1:50, 4:40, 7:15, 9:50 Cry Baby Matinee - G - TUE 1:00, 3:30, 6:00, 8:30 Friends with Benefits - R - THU 10:45, 1:30, 4:05, 7:00, 9:45 Rise of the Planet of the Apes - PG13 - FRITUE 10:45, 1:10, 3:30, 5:50, 8:10, 10:25

KA’AHUMANU 6 Queen Ka’ahumanu Shopping Center, 1-800-326-3264 (Matinees: every day until 4pm) Captain America: The First Avenger (2D) PG13 - THU-TUE 11:30, 2:10, 4:50, 7:30, 10:15 Captain America: The First Avenger (T3D) PG - THU 10:30, 1:10, 3:50, 6:30, 9:10. FRI-TUE 10:40, 1:20, 4:00, 6:40, 9:20.

Cars 2 (2D) - G - THU 11:05, 1:35, 4:05, 6:35.

FRI-TUE 11:00, 1:30.

The Change-Up - R - FRI-TUE 12:10, 2:35, 5:00, 7:25, 9:50 Horrible Bosses - R - THU 11:00, 1:10, 3:15, 5:20, 7:35, 9:35. FRI-TUE 4:00, 6:05, 8:10, 10:25.

The Smurfs (2D) - PG - THU-TUE 11:40, 2:00, 4:30, 7:00, 9:20 The Smurfs (3D) - PG - THU-TUE 12:40, 3:00, 5:20, 7:50, 10:10 Tree of Life - R - THU 9:05

MAUI MALL MEGAPLEX Maui Mall, 249-2222 (Matinees) Cowboys & Aliens - PG13 - THU (11:15, 1:00, 1:30, 2:00, 3:45, 4:15, 4:45), 6:30, 7:00, 7:30, 9:15, 10:15. FRI (11:20, 1:00, 1:30, 2:00, 3:45, 4:20, 4:40), 6:30, 7:00, 7:30, 9:10, 9:40, 10:10.

SAT-SUN (11:20, 1:00, 1:30, 2:00), 3:45, 4:20, 4:40, 6:30, 7:00, 7:30, 9:10, 9:40, 10:10. MONWED (11:20, 1:00, 1:30, 2:00, 3:45, 4:20, 4:40), 6:30, 7:00, 7:30, 9:10, 9:40, 10:10.

Crazy, Stupid, Love - PG13 - THU (1:40, 4:25), 7:10, 10:05. FRI (1:40, 4:25), 7:10, 10:00. SATSUN (1:40), 4:25, 7:10, 10:00. MON-WED (1:40, 4:25), 7:10, 10:00.

Friends with Benefits - R - THU (11:30, 1:35, 2:05, 4:10, 4:40), 6:45, 7:15, 9:20, 9:50. FRI (1:35, 4:10), 6:50, 9:20. SAT-SUN (1:35), 4:10, 6:50, 9:20. (1:35, 4:10), 6:50, 9:20.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 (2D) - PG13 - THU (12:00, 12:30, 3:00, 3:30), 6:00, 9:00. FRI (12:00, 3:00), 6:00, 9:00.

SAT-SUN (12:00, 3:00), 6:00, 9:00. MON-WED (12:00, 3:00), 6:00, 9:00.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 (3D) - PG13 - THU (1:05, 4:00), 6:25, 6:55, 9:30, 10:00. FRI (12:30, 3:30), 6:25, 9:30.

NEW THIS WEEK

Wilson, Rachel McAdams and, presumably, rapid-fire existential dialogue. 94 min.

THE CHANGE-UP - R - Fantasy - See this week’s Film Critique. 105 min.

THE SMURFS - PG - Animation - Because anything sweetened with nostalgia must

RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES - PG 13 - Sci Fi - Fear the James Franco, for he is

be dredged up and destroyed. 103 min.

(so hot, he’s surely) the Devil’s Pawn. 105 min.

NOW SHOWING CAPTAIN AMERICA- THE FIRST AVENGER - PG 13 - Action - Sorry, Walt Whitman fans. This movie may look grim and daring, but it isn’t about Abe Lincoln. 124 min.

CARS 2 - PG - Animated - The Pixar Cars are back, this time in Europe because some French race car challenged Lightning McQueen on TV. 120 min.

TRANSFORMERS: DARK OF THE MOON - PG 13 - What?! This isn’t a Pink Floyd laser light show? Well, never mind... Shia LaBeouf stars as Sam Witwicky, with Markiss McFadden as Lennox Team ‘Baby Face’ (and no, we did not make those names up). 157 min.

WINNIE THE POOH - G - Animated - Oh, do bother to see this movie. 69 min.

ZOOKEEPER - PG - Comedy - The ever-indecisive Kevin James (of Mall Cop

SAT-SUN (12:30), 3:30, 6:25, 9:30. MON-WED (12:30, 3:30), 6:25, 9:30.

Midnight in Paris - PG13 - THU 6:50, 9:05 Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides (3D) - PG13 - FRI 6:40, 9:55 Rise of the Planet of the Apes - PG13 WED/THU 12:00 (midnight). FRI (11:15, 11:45, 12:15, 1:45, 2:15, 2:45, 4:15, 4:45, 5:15), 6:45, 7:15, 7:45, 9:15, 9:45, 10:15. SAT-SUN (11:15, 11:45, 12:15, 1:45, 2:15, 2:45), 4:15, 4:45, 5:15, 6:45, 7:15, 7:45, 9:15, 9:45, 10:15. MON-WED (11:15, 11:45, 12:15, 1:45, 2:15, 2:45, 4:15, 4:45, 5:15), 6:45, 7:15, 7:45, 9:15, 9:45, 10:15.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2D) - PG13 - THU (12:10, 3:25). FRI (12:10, 3:25). SAT-SUN (12:10, 3:25). MON-WED (12:10, 3:25).

Transformers: Dark of the Moon (3D) - PG13 - THU 6:40, 9:55. SAT-SUN 6:40, 9:55. MONWED 6:40, 9:55.

Winnie the Pooh - G - THU (12:15, 2:15, 4:15).

FRI (12:15). SAT-SUN (12:15). MON-WED (12:15).

Zookeeper - PG - THU (12:00, 2:25, 4:45), 7:05, 9:25. FRI (2:25, 4:35), 7:05, 9:25. FRI 6:40, 9:55.

SAT-SUN (2:25), 4:35, 7:05, 9:25. MON-WED (2:25, 4:35), 7:05, 9:25.

WHARF CINEMA CENTER 658 Front Street, 249-2222 (Matinees) Cowboys & Aliens - PG13 - THU (11:00, 1:45), 4:30, 7:15, 10:00. FRI (1:45, 4:30), 7:15, 10:00.

SAT-SUN (1:45), 4:30, 7:15, 10:00. MON-WED (1:45, 4:30), 7:15, 10:00.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 (2D) - PG13 - THU (12:30, 3:30), 6:30, 9:30.

FRI-WED (1:00, 4:00), 7:00, 10:00.

The Smurfs (2D) - PG - THU (11:30, 2:00, 4:30), 7:00, 9:30. FRI (2:00, 4:30), 7:00, 9:30. SAT-SUN (2:00), 4:30, 7:00, 9:30. MON-WED (2:00, 4:30), 7:00, 9:30.

Zookeeper - PG - THU (12:05, 2:35), 5:00, 7:30, 10:00

fame), apparently, had a horrible career counselor. Adam Sandler, Sylvester Stallone and Cher lend their voices. 111 min.

LAST CHANCE FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS - R Comedy - Starring the “Dick In A Box” guy and Jackie from That ‘70s Show. Bonus: Mauian Woody Harrelson! 109 min.

TREE OF LIFE - R - Drama - Ooh, your rods and cones are so lucky! Magic movie man Terrence Malick does it again, and the flick’s finally made it to Maui. Brad Pitt and Sean Penn star. 138 min.

COWBOYS & ALIENS - PG13 - Spaghetti Sci Fi - About frickin’ time! Director Jon Favreau does us the favor of casting Indiana Jones and James Bond, to boot. 118 min.

CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE - PG13 - Comedy - Hilarious and heartbreaking, this new Steve Carrell flick is uneven, but touching. 107 min.

HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS: PART 2 - PG 13 - Fantasy - Spoiler: this is the one where Harry dies. 140 min.

HORRIBLE BOSSES - R - Comedy - Live vicariously through Jason Bateman, Jennifer Aniston and Jason Sudeikis. 109 min.

RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES

MIDNIGHT IN PARIS - PG13 - Comedy - The latest from Woody Allen stars Owen

AUGUST 4, 2011 19

PICKS

This Week's Picks

DIVERSIONS, DALLIANCES & DATES

BY ANU YAGI

String Theory

This Week in Nukes

(Saturday) August 6, 10am-12pm, Maui Nui Botanical Gardens; fee applies

(Saturday) August 6, 6pm, UH Maui College, Kahului; free

“I

n traditional Hawaiian culture, the art of making aho (cordage) was an important skill,” explains the Bishop Museum’s website. “Lacking metal, aho was used for houses, canoes, adzes, nets, fishlines, and more. From selection of the right plant to raw material processing to the making of aho, a great deal of knowledge was needed.” If you’re interested in gaining some of this ancient knowledge, the Maui Nui Botanical Gardens’ cordage-making workshop is in your wheelhouse. Sponsored by the Hawaii Tourism Authority, County of Maui Office of Economic Development and the Department of Water Supply, Hawaiian ethnobotanist Cathy Davenport instructs a hands-on workshop in the art of Hawaiian cordage-making this Saturday (August 6). ‘Olelo No’eau #1454 (Pukui, 1983) is “kama’ilo ka waha, hana ka lima,” which means “while talking, keep the hands busy.” But if as you’re working you find the task frustratingly tedious, simply remember Franklin D. Roosevelt’s presidential proverb, “When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.” PS: The class size is limited, so if you really want to go, prompt registration’s prudent. [249-2797; mnbg.org / info@mnbg.org]

F

or anyone unlucky enough to be standing in the Japanese city of Hiroshima at 8:15 in the morning local time on Aug. 6, 1945, it would have seemed as though the atmosphere suddenly turned to fire. One instant there was a modern urban center, untouched by American bombers, and the next it was ruin and flame. Nearly 100,000 people ultimately lost their lives in the radioactive inferno let loose by the world’s first atomic bomb, dropped for reasons that historians now tell us had less to do with Japan than with the Soviet Union. But no matter: we now live in an atomic world, in which power generators and explosives powered by the splitting of atoms hang over us, which means the 66th anniversary of the destruction of Hiroshima is as good a time as any to talk about nuclear issues and problems. Sponsored by Maui Peace Action, the UH Maui College Peace Club and a coalition of local churches, this event at the UH Maui College’s Pilina Multi Purpose Room looks at the nuclear question in a variety of ways. There’s a talk by physics teacher/activist Lynda Williams on the threat posed by radiation in all its forms. Then Yumiko Nishimoto who will tell what it was like to evacuate from tsunami-ravaged Fukushima in the midst of a nuclear catastrophe at that city’s reactor. There’s also going to be dancing by Akari Ueoka and the Maui Izanai-Yosakoi Dancers, as well as origami crane making, Koto music by Mike Inaba and Koko Walbee and some Maui Taiko drumming thrown in. 878-8015. (Anthony Pignataro)

MONDAY 8:00-11:00PM ALL AGES NO COVER

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10PM-CLOSE

JESSICA RABBITT & KANOA

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THURSDAY 9-CLOSE FRIDAYS 8PM-CLOSE NO COVER 21+ AFTER FOOD SERVICE

DAMON PARILLO & DANYEL ALYANA WINNER OF MAUI TIMES ALL AGES OPEN MIC NO COVER

SOUNDS OF ADDICTION

900 FRONT ST. +1-808-667-7400 20AUGUST 4, 2011

PICKS

BY ANU YAGI

Roller Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

OG Twitter

Saturday (August 6), 7:30pm-1am, Moose McGillycuddyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, Kihei

(Wednesday) August 10, 6pm, Makawao Public Library; free

W

ith bad-ass (in hot pants and fishnets) reputations preceding the Maui Roller Girls (MRG), you should already know that any chance to party with these wicked wahine is a chance worth taking (keeping in mind that when with these raucous rollers, you will indeed be taking chances of the convivial sort).

Next on the roster: the girls team up to party down at Moose McGillycuddyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in Kihei to celebrate this (2511) South Kihei Road watering holeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s anniversary. Because itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cool, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll mention the event features music by DJ Tee (9pm-1am), all-night drink specials, and a silent auction (8-11pm) stuffed with covet-able goods and services like massages, meals and merchandise (all with low opening-bids). Though the MRG is all you need for a good party, we still have three more words for you: midnight balloon drop. Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re welcome. [mauirollergirls.com / @mauirg on Twitter; moosemcgillycuddys.com/kihei-hawaii.html] PS: The roller girls are regulars at Wailuku First Friday (August 5; 6-9pm) and this monthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s events are not-tobe-missed. Our friends at Requests (in other balloon-worthy news) mark Mauiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s only record shopâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 21st birthday with â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Uptown Get Down 3,â&#x20AC;? the third annual b-boy competition held right in the middle of the road. Also, Gallerie Ha purveyor Pat Masumotoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Aloha Poetry Slam is bigger and better than ever, plus SLAM featuring David Choy and Clay Mortensen perform in front of the historic Iao Theater. [facebook.com/wailukufirstfriday]

D

ude, if only Darwin had visited our curious and comely archipelago, he would have discovered that the most isolated island chain in the world (us!)â&#x20AC;&#x201D;over 30 million years of Goldilocks evolutionâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; yielded unrivaled endemism. I.e. when it comes to radiation of species, we kick the Galapagos Islandsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; butt. For example, did you know that there are a whopping 71 known taxa of endemic birds in Hawaii? Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, like, a lot. If you want to learn more, staff members from the Maui Forest Bird Recovery Project are lecturing at the Makawao Public Library this Wednesday (August 10), discussing how exactly flora and fauna arrived on our igneous isles, and reasons why 23 of these species have become extinct. [Maui Forest Bird Recovery Project: 573-0280; Makawao Public Library: 573-8785] PS: If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re really gun-ho about endemic birds, the Friends of the Haleakala National Park can help you spock â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;um. Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re hosting a tent-camping volunteer service trip (August 6-9) to Haleakala Craterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Waikau area (located just above the native forest at Koâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;olau Gap); and while you malama da â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;aina by removing invasive species to help protect native vegetation, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a good chance youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll see one of Hawaiiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s rare, winged seraphim in their natural habitat. [For information and reservations, send e-mail to sageblank@aol.com or visit fhnp.org and click â&#x20AC;&#x153;service trips.â&#x20AC;?]

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AUGUST 4, 2011 21

LIVE MUSIC ON THE NORTHSHORE!

RESTAURANT

CALENDAR

Da Kine Calendar

BY ANU YAGI

THURSDAY AUGUST 4

WAVETRAIN s 0-

FRIDAY AUGUST 5

pure

SPONSORED BY SPINSUNLIMITEDUSA.COM

FEATURING DJ DASNFX

“DOWN AND DIRTY DANCE PRODUCTIONS” SF, CA SPECIAL GUEST DJ SAL WITH SUNNIOUNGE, MAUI AND MORE... 80-

SATURDAY AUGUST 6

MAUI PRANKSTERS

BIG SHOWS SAVE THE DATE: “THE NEWLYMET GAME” - Fri, Aug 5. Gameshow Fanatics debut their coolest new concept, a professional-style game show that marries speed dating and classic TV quiz show, “The Newlywed Game.” Join host Brenton Keith, who captures all the smarmy charm of old school quiz shows with his powdered coiffure and dummy microphone. $10. 8:30pm mingling/9:30pm first game. LuLu’s Lahaina, Lahaina Cannery Mall, Honoapiilani Hwy., Lahaina; 661-0808; gameshowfanatics.com

THE THROWDOWNS CD RELEASE BLOWOUT - Sat, Aug 6. Celebrate the release

4!#/3 -!2'!2)4!3 -%8)#!. "%%23

of The Throwdowns’ first full-length album “Legs Of Our Own” with a star-studded night featuring performances by Maui’s jazz jewel Lily Meola, Big Island’s soul sister Kimie and with special appearances by Marty Dread and MOTHxp. 5pm gates / 6pm show. See this week’s cover story for more.

PS: Check out the official after party at Three’s Bar & Grill (see Saturday’s events for more). Yokouchi Pavilion / A&B Amphitheater, One Cameron Way, Kahului, 242-SHOW (7469), mauiarts.org / thethrowdowns.com

BOOKING INFO: JCHERMANMAUI@YAHOO.COM

JIM BRICKMAN - Sun, Aug 7. Brickman is a

THE DAYS BETWEEN CELEBRATING THE LIFE OF

JERRY GARCIA 0-

TUESDAY AUGUST 9

PELIGROSO TUESDAYS! 142 HANA HWY, PAIA

808-573-8085

www.charleysmaui.com

“home of the $1 mai tai” Kihei’s BEST Sunset Cocktail Spot!

AUTHENTIC MEXICAN FOOD BURGERS SALADS Live Music Daily Sunset Happy Hour 3-7 Nightly Entertainment

THURSDAY 4 9pm KIHEI’S LEGENDARY WEEKLY

RAMPAGE

REGGAE DANCE PARTY

DAT GUYZ KEOLA AND BAND PLAYING ALL THE ISLAND FAVORITES

ISLAND SOULZ

REGGAE MUSIC AND MORE

KARAOKE INDUSTRY NIGHT

FRIDAY 5 9pm

STAGE ONO! AT THE IAO PRESENTS “ALL MY SONS” - Mon, Aug 8. A Maui OnStage ONO (one night only) production of “All My Sons” by Arthur Miller. A classic 1940s American drama about ethics versus survival. Featured readers include Don Carlson, Jerry Eiting, Michael Pulliam, Jennifer Rose, Chris Rose, Jackie Shea and Barbara Sedano.

See this week’s Arts & Entertainment feature for more. 6:30pm. Iao Theater, 68 N. Market St., Wailuku; 242-6969; mauionstage.com

MAPA PRESENTS “DAMN YANKEES,” A MUSICAL COMEDY - Every Sun, Fri &

SUNDAY 7 9pm

Sat. The story of a middle-aged, rabid baseball fan who makes a pact with the Devil for a chance to lead his favorite baseball team–the Washington Senators–to victory against the New York Yankees.

See this week’s Arts & Entertainment feature for more.$25 adults / $22 seniors (62-years-old or better) / $18 students. Maui Tropical Plantation’s Field of Dreams, 1670 Honoapiilani Hwy., Wailuku; 2448760; mauiacademy.org

MONDAY 8 9pm HAPPY HOUR PRICES ALL DAY!!

TUESDAY 9 9pm

SMOOTH ISLAND MUSIC $1 TACOS $3 CORONAS $3 CUERVO SHOTS

WEDNESDAY 10 9pm GET UP & JAM OR WATCH THE

OPEN MIC RISING STARS

1913 S Kihei Rd 808.891.8010 ACROSS FROM FOODLAND

22 AUGUST 4, 2011

THE MIGHTY DIAMONDS - Tue, Aug 9. Bunny. Tabby. Judge. Need we say more?

They’re the longest-running vocal trio in Jamaican musical history—with 42 years under their belt (and counting). 21+ only. $25 advance / $30 day-of. 9pm-1:30am. Hard Rock Cafe, 900 Front St., Lahaina; 667-7400

SATURDAY 6 9pm

KARAOKE

JUNIOR LACUESTA

platinum-selling artist who’s celebrated for revolutionizing the sound of solo piano with pop instruments and star-studded vocal collaborations. $25/ $35/ $50/ $65 (VIP). 3pm. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org

CIRQUE POLYNESIA - Mon-Sat. It’s Cirque du Soleil-esque with a uniquely Polynesian twist. Enjoy amazing high-wire acts, aerial acrobatics, illusions, and mind-boggling contortionists. P.S. Did you know the cast, theme and lineup are all-new? Yep. The show now features more daring aerial displaces, the antics of Pepe the Clown, a Mongolian contortionist and a finale featuring The Wheel of Death.

Tickets start at $62 (ask about deals for keiki and

kama’aina). 6pm. Hyatt Regency Maui Resort & Spa, 200 Nohea Kai Dr., Kaanapali; 667-4540; maui.hyatt. com / cirquepolynesia.com

TICKETS ON SALE NA KOA IKAIKA BASEBALL - Want to root, root, root for the home team? Cheer your heart out at some (or all!) of the 48 home games this season (May through August). PS: Check out the official Na Koa Ikaika after parties at the Kahului Ale House!

VIP seating $13 single/$528 season; stadium seating $9 single/$352 season; general admission $6 single/$220 season; military & keiki $4 single/$176 season. Ichiro “Iron” Maehara Stadium, 700 Halia Nakoa St., Wailuku

MAUI SUMMER MASTERWORKS FESTIVAL - Fri & Sat, Aug 12 & 13. Featuring Vivaldi’s concerto for two trumpets, Mozart’s Vesperae solennes de Confessore, KV339 & The Magnicat in D major BWV 243 by J.S. Bach and more. Accompanied by an orchestra under the baton of Robert Wills and sung by the Maui Summer Masterworks Chorale, comprised of over 60 of Maui’s finest choral singers. $15/$25. 7:30pm.

Kihei Baptist Church, 1655 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 875-9920; musicalvoicesofmaui.org

SAVE THE DATE: ANNUAL WILD DOLPHIN SAND SCULPTURE CONTEST Sat, Aug 13. Held at the North end of Keawakapu Beach, this beloved annual event is open to individual and group participants. Everyone gets something just for participating, and juried prizes include free tickets to PWF cruises and events, marine wildlife posters and books, and much more. Free. 8am-12pm. Pacific Whale Foundation; 249-8977; pacificwhale.org

DIVINE PLAYDATE - Sat, Aug 13. Carpool to sacred sights with Mother URI to activate each of your chakras. $199. Meets in Wailuku; register for details. 757-9306; archhealing.com

SLACK KEY MASTERS WITH JOHN KEAWE - Thu, Aug 18. Grammy Award winner George Kahumoku Jr. hosts Slack Key Masters each month and opens the show with his musical and storytelling talents. Kahumoku’s special guest in August is John Keawe, who has ten popular albums to his credit. Also features hula

by Keawe’s lovely wife, Hope. $25 / $25 VIP + applicable fees. 7:30pm. McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org

SOLO SESSIONS WITH HENRY KAPONO - Fri, Aug 19. An intimate storytellying concert with the “Wild Hawaiian” himself, Henry Kapono (of C&K fame). Chee hoo! $25 / $25 VIP + applicable fees.

7:30pm. McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org

AMERICA - Fri, Aug 26. American you dig it?

Fans of the band will be pleased to know that Gerry Beckley and Dewey Bunnell are headed to the Valley Isle. The group is as active as ever, playing over 100 live shows worldwide per year and is due to release their new album “Back Pages” July 26. A Tom Moffatt production. MACC member discounts available. $35 / $50 / $65. 7:30pm. Maui Arts & Cultural Center, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org

SOLO SESSIONS WITH BENJAMIN VERDERY - Thu, Aug 25. The New York Times calls Benjamin Verdery “iconoclastic” and “inventive.” Not too shabby, eh? But it makes sense for a six stringer and prolific composer who’s played worldwide, including at the International Guitar Festival (Havana, Cuba), Wigmore Hall (England) and the Metropolitan Opera (New York City). $25 / $45 VIP. 7:30 pm. McCoy Studio Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org

WANDA SYKES - Fri, Sept 9. I love her best in her role as Biggie Shortie in “Pootie Tang” (2001).

Tickets go on sale Friday, July 15 at 10am. See you there! $56 / $66 / $76. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org THE YARDBIRDS - Fri, Sept 16. These Rock and Roll Hall of Famers play a benefit for the Hawaiian Lifeguard Association’s Junior Lifeguard Program. $35-$55. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org MAUI JAZZ & BLUES FESTIVAL - Thu through Sun, Sept 22-25. Featuring folks like Les McCann, Jevon Jackson, Tom Scott, Brian Stoltz, Skip Martin, Brittni Paiva, Henry Allen and more. The weekend of events kicks off Thursday (Sept 22) at Stella Blues with SLAM and special guests, continues on Friday (Sept 23) with a VIP jazz dinner at the Grand Wailea’s Grand Dining Room, gets hot and heavy on Saturday (Sept 24) at the Grand’s oceanfront Molokini Garden, and wraps up on Sunday (Sept 25) with a special jazz brunch. Special room packages available. 8751234; mauijazzandbluesfestival.com

CAKE - Sun, Oct 23. Cake! That is all. You’re welcome. MACC members’ pre-sale privileges continue through Aug 5. General sales thereafter. $39 / $49 / $89. 7:30pm. Castle Theater, MACC, One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469)

FOODIE VEGETABLE GARDEN DESIGN & CARE WORKSHOP - Sat, Aug 6 or Sat, Aug 13.

Grow your own garden yummies. At this workshop, learn the basics of vegetable garden design and creation, with tips on plant propagation, organic fertilization, soil building, composting, irrigation and more. Call or e-mail to register. $60. 572-3067; evnryan@hotmail.com

FARM TO TABLE AT HUMU - Sun through Sat, Aug 7-13. Look, I don’t need to tell you foodies that lusting for locavore is all the rage. Nor do I need to tell you that Humu’s three-course Farm-to-Table dinner is a tasty way to explore tongue treats, homegrown style. Grand Wailea Resort, 3850 Wailea Alanui Dr., Wailea; 875-1234 ext. 4900 GET YOUR CLAMBAKE ON - Tue, Aug 9.

SPIN DOCTORS - Sat, Aug 20. The two

Clams, mussles, prawns, portuguese sausage, huli huli chicken, corn, potatos and bread. Its a seafood fest Village Cafe style! Every Tuesday night dine under the stars overlooking the West Maui Mountains listening to local, live music! $35. 5:30-9pm. Village Cafe and Sweet Shoppe, 2000 Village Rd., Kapalua; 665-1122; villagecafeandsweetshoppe.com

princes who adore you will have to compete to see who gets to be your date at the Spin Doctors concert, live under the stars. $55. 8pm.

Royal Lahaina Resort, 2780 Kekaa Dr., Lahaina; 1-877-GROOV (47668); groovetikets.com

ANTINORI SUNSET WINE DINNER - Tue, Aug 9. Five divine courses—like hamachi crudo and crispy duck breast—paired with wines like Vermentino and Brunello (respectively) will transport your taste buds to another stratosphere. $125. 6:30pm.

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

08/04

08/05

08/06

08/07

08/08 - 08/10

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

ALE HOUSE

Thirsty Thursday Ladies’ Night w/ Q103’s Shaggy & DJ Jamn J, 9pm; no cover

Bottoms Up Nightclub w/ DJ C, DJ LX & Emcee Jay-J 10pm; $10

[UFC, 3pm] / Rock & Roll Night w/ DJ Diesel Dave 9pm; no cover

Simma Down Nightclub w/ DJ JamnJ 10pm; no cover

MON - Open Mic Jam Sesh w/ host Terri Garrison, 9pm / WED - Free Karaoke Night w/ Braddah Francis, 9pm

AMBROSIA

Jamie Gallo, 7pm / Old School Thursdays w/ DJ Del Sol, 10pm

Whatever You Want w/ DJ AstroRaph, 10pm

Sunrise Saturdaze w/ DJ Decka, 10pm

ULTRA w/ DJ CIA, 10pm

MON – Cocktails For A Cause; Toby Couture & Amelia Nelson, 9pm / TUE – Dirty House Tuesdays w/ DJ La Rage / WED – Red Carpet Movie Night , 7:30pm; Maui’s HI-5 Night (S.I.N.) w/ DJs Del Sol & CIA, 10pm

Live Music

Live Music

355 E. Kamehameha, Kahului - 877-9001

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-1011

CARY & EDDIE’S HIDEAWAY 500 N. Puunene Ave., Kahului - 873-6555

Disconnection: The Party 9:30pm

CASANOVA

1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-0220

CHARLEY’S

142 Hana Hwy., Paia - 579-8085

COOL CAT CAFE

Wharf Cinema Center, Front St., Lahaina - 667-0908

DA KITCHEN, LAHAINA

Wharf Cinema Center, Front St., Lahaina - 661-4900

WED - Wild Wahine Wednesday w/ DJ Blast & Chilltown, 10pm; $10

Wavetrain 9pm; $5

Live Entertainment

Live Entertainment

Sunday Funday

Junior & Oren 7:30-10pm; no cover

Dave Caroll 7:30-10pm; no cover

Dave Caroll 7:30-10pm; no cover

Erin Smith 7:30-10pm; no cover

MON - Peter D, 7:30-10pm / TUE - Live Jazz, 7-10pm / WED - Ryan Palma, 7:30-10pm (no cover)

Ladies’ Night 10pm-close

Hip Hop Night 10pm-close

Open Mic/Hip Hop Night 10pm-close

Open Mic / Talent Show 5:30-8:30pm

MON - Magic Monday 6:30-8:30pm / WED - Live Music 5:30-8:30pm

Kama’aina Nights feat.

Wolf 6-8pm

Kama’aina Nights feat. Wolf, 6-8pm

Friday’s in the Sky Lounge w/ DJ CIA, 8pm12am

DAVID PAUL’S ISLAND GRILL 900 Front St., Lahaina - 662-3000

DIAMONDS ICE BAR

TBA 10pm; no cover

DJ Music 10pm; no cover

Blues Spirit of Maui 10pm; no cover

Jordan & Wolf 10pm; no cover

MON - Gomega / TUE - Rampage / WED Jukebox Party (all sets 10pm; no cover)

DOG & DUCK IRISH PUB

Quiz Night 8pm; no cover

Jordan & Wolf 10pm; no cover

Big John 10pm; no cover

Sebrina Barron 10pm; no cover

MON – Live Music / TUE - Lawaia & Ben / WED - Big John (all sets 10pm; no cover)

Karaoke & Darts

Karaoke & Darts

UFC, 3pm

Karaoke & Darts

WED - Go Go Dancers & DJ Music, 9pmclose; no cover

Rampage 9pm-close; no cover

Dat Guyz 9pm-close; no cover

Island Soulz 9pm-close; no cover

Karaoke Industry Night 8pm-close; no cover

MON - Karaoke, 8pm-close / TUE - Junior Lacuesta WED - Jordan Cudworth & Open Mic Night

Open Mic Night, 7:3010pm; no cover (all ages)

Sounds of Addiction 5-8pm

Live Music

Live Music

TUE - The Mighty Diamonds, 9pm; $25/$30

Karaoke

Karaoke

Karaoke

1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-9299

1913 S. Kihei Rd. - 875-9669

GREEN LEAF SPORTS BAR 1088 Lower Main St., Wailuku - 244-4888

HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-8010

HARD ROCK CAFE 900 Front St., Lahaina - 667-7400

ISANA

515 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-8199

Capische? 555 Kaukahi St., Wailea; 879-2224; capische.com

$5. 10pm-1am. Charley’s Restaurant & Saloon, 142 Hana Hwy., Paia; 579-8085

ANNOUNCEMENTS

THIS OLD HOUSE 3.0 - Best of Maui’s DJ Del

23RD ANNUAL LAHAINA POSTER CONTEST - Deadline: (Friday) September 2, 2011. Winning art becomes the official, limited edition Lahaina poster for 2012 (hmm... Front St. apocalypse a la Clint Eastwood, anyone?) and the artist receives a $2,500 cash prize. For more information, click around the Lahaina Town Action Committee website (visitlahaina. com) or call Lynn Donavan at 667-9175.

EVENTS THURSDAY, AUGUST 4 FREEDOM & AL TORRE CONCERT - Freedom’s a “mystic and word master” who’s “been an arrow catcher in his walk and a shadow dancer.”

Frankly, I have no idea what any of that means— but it sounds cool! Plus, special guests Gre Murat (Freedom’s father). $12. 8-11pm. Mandala, Baldwin Ave., Paia; 579-9556

MEOW: BAD KITTY’S BACK! - It’s been awhile since we’ve had the pleasure of seeing this purrfectly on-point rock ensemble—check ‘em out!

Free. 8-11pm. Diamonds Ice Bar, 1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 874-9299

Sol and DJ CIA’s house repertoire will have you bouncing from the ‘90s into the new millennium.

Free. 10pm-2am. Ambrosia, 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 891-1011

FRIDAY, AUGUST 5

big burlesque party. Make haste (safely), then settle-in for a sensuously good time. Three’s Bar & Grill, Kihei; 879-3133

DISCONNECTION: THE PARTY - “A music movement created to spread the love of electronic dance music,” Orion Musik and Surface Recordings Group will make you wanna boogie woogie woogie. 9:30pm-2am. Casanova, 1188 Makawao Ave., Makawao; orion-musik.org / surfacerecordings.com

ZEN ARCHERY WORKSHOP - Fri through

MODELS & BOTTLES - Hot models + cold

Sat, Aug 5-7. Learn the zen-ful art of kyudo (Japanese archery) from Legolas-like masters Rick “Jyozen” Beal and Bodhi Hanna. This workshop is only offered annually, so if you miss it this year, you’ll have to shoot for next. See This Week’s Picks for more. $150. 9am-4pm. Lahaina Jodo Mission, 12 Ala Moana St., Lahaina; 463-9656; lahainajodomission.org

champagne = awesome—especially when 100 percent of proceeds benefit Ocean Defender Hawaii (supporting clean beaches in the 808). DJ N8 Castro spinns Fashions by Karamel Collection, hair by Edge Salon, makeup by Kahulani Davis, and accessories

by Hoops N Things. Plus, a runway walk, live photo shoot and more. 9:30pm-2am. Stella Blues Cafe, 874-3779; jusslovelife.com

WAILUKU FIRST FRIDAY: “THE UPTOWN GET DOWN 3” - It’s a block party!

SATURDAY, AUGUST 6

Experience an exciting street fest in the heart of Wailuku town, which this month celebrates the 21st birthday of Maui’s only record store, Requests. See This Week’s Picks for more. Free. 6:30-9pm.Market, Main and Vineyard St., Wailuku; facebook.com/ wailukufirstfriday

FASHION FUSHION - Fashions by Pakaloha Bikinis and Pollys Closet modeled by local hotties during a live photo shoot by Jackie Jean and Juniper Ruby and filmmaker Alberto Rojas. Plus, hair and makeup by Salon Bella, haute habiliments by Hoops N Things, and live art by Lion Fish. $10. 9:30pm2am. Timba, 505 Front St., Lahaina; jusslovelife.com

EXHALE! AT BODY ALIVE YOGA - Take a breather from the crowded Wailuku First Friday street scene and head upstairs to this hip new yoga studio. This month, the event featues the art of Lilah Clay and Donnalee Angelsong, music by DJ Boogiemeister, and group hypnosis by Joshua Greenberg (6:15pm). Also, Jessica Quinn shows off her Ayurvedic spice blends, plus tongue-treats by Krissta Caldwell and feather hair extensions by deborah.

Free. 5-9pm. Body Alive Yoga and Movement Studio, 1995 Main St., upstairs, Wailuku

WAVETRAIN #109 - Roscoe Wright is sitting in on drums for the one-and-only Paul Marchetti, and promises too “keep it extra greasy for y’all.”

BURLESQUE - “Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly,” says Gypsy Rose Lee—except, of course, getting your booty down to Three’s for the

KANAKA HEKILI M/C HOT AUGUST GOLF TOURNAMENT - Live music and food follows the tournament at a special awards ceremony (open to the public; Kihei VFW, 1pm). Hole-in-one prizes include $10,000 or new Harley Davidson motorcycle.

Plus, $100 for closest to the pin, and $100 each for both men’s and women’s longest drive. Prizes for first, second and third place teams are $300, $200 and $150, respectively. Tourney limited to first 144 players. A portion of the proceeds benefits the Maui Veterans of Foreign Wars. 6am check-in. 7am shotgun. $100 per golfer (three-person scramble). 6am.

Elleair Maui Golf Club, 1345 Piilani Hwy., Kihei; 2640168; kanakahekili.com

2011 HAWAII CANOE RACING ASSOCIATION (HCRA) STATE CHAMPIONSHIP - Join thousands of enthusiasts and witness a stunning cultural and athletic display.

The HCRA “was formed for the purpose of engaging in charitable, educational, cultural, and

WED - Karaoke

recreational activities associated with Hawaiian canoeing,” the state’s official team sport.

This year’s state championship regatta’s motto loosely translates to reference “a canoe headed in the right direction”), and will be hosted by none other than our own Valley Isle. Opening ceremonies begin at 8:15am followed by an exhibition race open to all cancer survivors at 8:30am. The official race begins at 9am. Note that all parking located at the Lahaina Civic Center (1840 Honoapiilani Hwy.; approximately 3/4 mile before the race site, on the right hand side, near the entrance to the post office and fire station). Free. 8am. Hanakao’o Beach Park, Honoapi’ilani Hwy., Lahaina; hcrapaddler.com/

BREADFRUIT WORKSHOP: FROM ROOT TO FRUIT - What’s more ono than breadfruit baked on an open fire, sprinkled with a little salt?

Learn all about this fruiting, flowering tree in a workshop presented by the Lahaina Restoration Foundation. PS: Did you know that the breadfruit (Artocarpus altilis) is part of the mulberry family?

9am. Lahaina Jodo Mission, 12 Ala Moana St., Lahaina; Register by calling 661-3262

CORDAGE-MAKING WORKSHOP - In ancient Hawaii, cordage was used to lash homes, canoes and tools. Join Hawaiian ethnobotanist Cathey Davenport in a hands-on workshop in cordagemaking (10am-12pm). Space is limited and fees apply. E-mail info@mnbg.org to request a registration form. See This Week’s Picks for more. Maui Nui Botanical Gardens, 150 Kanaloa Ave., Kahului; 2492797; mnbg.org

TENT CAMPING SERVICE TRIP IN HALEAKALA CRATER - Sat through Tue, Aug 6-9.

Volunteer on a service trip with the Friends of Haleakala National Park and go tent-camping at Waikau (just above the native forest of Ko’olau Gap). Remove invasive species to protect native vegetation, see rare native plants and hear the strange, delightful birds who inhabit the House of the Sun. For infor-

AUGUST 4, 2011 23

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

08/04

08/05

08/06

08/07

08/08 - 08/10

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

JAVA JAZZ

Guest Performer 7pm - close; no cover

Tracy Stiles 7pm - close; no cover

Rick Glencross 7pm - close; no cover

Farzad & Mike Madden 7pm - close; no cover

MON - The Chris & Mary Jane Xperiment / TUE - Ras Shaggai / WED - Rick Glencross

KAHALE’S

Vince Esquire, 7pm

Kenny Roberts, 7pm

Eight Track Players, 7pm

Sunday Country Jam feat. The Kihei Cowboys, 7pm

MON - Kawika, 7pm / TUE - Kahala, 7pm

1810 6:30-8:30pm

Live Music 8-10pm

Live Music 8-10pm

Sam Ahia 6:30-8:30pm

MON through WED - Sam Ahia 6:30-8:30pm

Karaoke & Dancing w/ Auntie Toddy Lilikoi 9:30-close; no cover

Karaoke & Dancing w/ Auntie Toddy Lilikoi 9:30-close; no cover

3350 L. Honoapiilani Rd. - 667-0787

1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 875-7711

KIMO’S

845 Front St., Lahaina - 661-4811

KOBE STEAKHOUSE

136 Dickenson St., Lahaina - 667-5555

Fulton Tashombe & The Maui Jazz All-Stars, 7-10pm

LONGHI’S LAHAINA 888 Front St., Lahaina - 667-2288

Live Music & Dancing

Live Music & Dancing DJ Canespider, 11pm-close

Easy Listening w/ Neto 8-10pm DJ AstroRaph, 10pm-close

Karaoke w/ Manino 7:30-11pm; no cover

MON - Service Industry Night WED - Karaoke w/ Manino, 7:30-11 pm

Howard Ahia 6-8pm; no cover

Live Music

Status Party feat. DJ Twizy, DJ Jem and DJ Treb, plus Philly Blunt & Money Mike, 10pm; $10

Kenny Roberts

MON - All Access DJs, 10pm / TUE - “Lahaina Idol” Karaoke w/ Troy, 9pm-12am / WED Kenny Roberts, 5-8pm (all no cover)

MERRIMAN’S

Ranga Pae

Ranga Pae

Ranga Pae

Ranga Pae

TUE - David Choy / WED - Ranga Pae

MOANA CAFE

Phil & Angie Benoit

LULU’S KIHEI

1945 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-9944

LULU’S LAHAINA

Lahaina Cannery Mall - 661-0808

1 Bay Club Pl., Kapalua - 669-6400

71 Baldwin Ave., Paia - 579-9999

MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDY’S LAHAINA

DJ Music

TUE - Open Mic Night

Live Music

Live Music

Live Music

Live Music

MON through WED - Live Music

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE

Murray Thorne, 7-9pm / Pub Quiz Night w/ Trish “The Dish” Smith, 9pm-12am

Gail Swanson, 6:308:30pm / Dance Night w/ Alika, 10pm-12am

Alika Nako’oka, 6-9pm / Deep Cover, 10pm12:30am

The Celtic Tigers w/ Roger McKinley / 6:30-9:30pm / Big John, 10pm-12am

MON - SLAM feat. David Choy & Clay Mortensen, 7-9:30pm; Rocking the ‘80s Party 10pm-12am / TUE - TBA / WED Willie K, 7-9pm

OCEANS BAR & GRILL

DiscoNekt w/ DJ Boomshot,10pm; no cover

DJ Stylz 10pm; no cover

UFC, 3pm / Reggae in the Valley Han Hou Party + Annual Duck Phat Bash, 10pm

Jordan 6-9pm

Dress Like a Pirate Night

SANSEI - KAPALUA

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

SANSEI - KIHEI

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

Free Karaoke 10pm-1am; no cover

71 Baldwin Ave., Paia - 579-9999

100 Kaukahi St., Wailea - 874-1131

1819 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 891-2414

R.S. SHARKY’S FAMILY RESTAURANT

MON - Eat & Place Day Dance Dance Extreme Competition, 7pm / TUE - Karaoke w/ DJ Jay / WED - Western Night & BBQ Championship

41 E. Lipa St., Kihei - 874-5115

115 Bay Dr., Lahaina - 669-6286

1881 S. Kihei Rd., Ste. KT116, Kihei - 879-0004

mation and reservations, send email to sageblank@ aol.com and visit fhnp.org (click “service trips”). See This Week’s Picks for more.

at the KCC state race tent) / $20 door. 10pm. Hard Rock Cafe, 900 Front St., Lahaina; 244-5224; mauinuicanoerace.com

MONDAY, AUGUST 8

DISCUSS NUCLEAR ISSUES - The UHMC

REGGAE IN THE VALLEY HANA HOU & ANNUAL DUCK PHAT BIRTHDAY BASH

This pair’s chemistry will blind you with the science of their music. 7-10pm. Java Jazz, 3350 Honoapiilani Hwy., 667-0787

Peace Club and friends host a Hiroshima/Nagasaki remembrance with a talk by physics teach/activitst Lynda Williams on the threat posed by radiation in all its forms. See This Week’s Picks for more. Free.

6pm. University of Hawaii Maui College, 310 W. Kaahumanu Ave., Kahului; 878-8015

EXHIBIT A: THE ART OF SCIENCE - An exhibition featuring scientartists from Maui and abroad, it’s the latest Jungle to Jungle fundraiser— and one and all are invited. Among the amazing artists on the roster are Ghalib El-Khalidi, Tim Garcia, Dr. Gary Greenburg, Rachel G, Josephine Tempongko, Tom Sewell and Rob McBroom. $10. 7-10pm.

Paia Tattoo Parlor, 120 Hana Hwy., Paia; 579-8515; paiatattooparlor.com / tx.ly/nxy

THE MAUI ROLLER GIRLS HELP CELEBRATE MOOSE’S BIRTHDAY - Because roller girls just wanna have fun, Kihei’s Moose McGillycuddy’s invited the gal gang to help celebrate their birthday. Features music

by DJ Tee, a silent auction and even a midnight balloon drop. See This Week’s Picks for more.

7:30pm-1am. Moose McGillycuddy’s, 2511 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 891-8644; mauirollergirls.com / moosemcgillycuddys.com

THE 2011 AFTER STATES PARTIES - Hosted by Maui Nui Canoe Race and Kahana Canoe Club (KCC). Featuring Dat Guys, Malino, Jacob of The Alliez and ‘Til The Cops Come. $15 advance (available

24AUGUST 4, 2011

THE CHRIS & MARY JANE XPERIMENT -

- Featuring Innavision, Dani Girl, Piilani Arias, and Rushouze Allstars. 10pm. Oceans Bar & Grill, 1819 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 891-2414

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 10

THE THROWDOWNS CD RELEASE AFTER PARTY - Delightfully apropos, the official

PRESENTATION BY THE MAUI FOREST BIRD RECOVERY PROJECT - Hawaii’s stun-

T-downs after party is in [drum roll, please] Kihei town! DJ N8 Castro brings the beats, augmenting a night of plene kine cool giveaways and drink specials. $5 (free with T-downs CD release concert ticket stub). 10pm-1am. Three’s Bar and Grill 1945 .

Kihei Rd., Kihei; 879-3133

ning endemism is unsurpassed. Discuss exactly how flora and fauna made it to our isolated igneous isles, and learn about efforts to protect the archipelago’s rare, winged seraphim. See This Week’s Picks for more. Free. 6pm. Makawao Public Library, 1159 Makawao Ave., Makawao; 573-8785

SCREENING: “THE LOST BOYS” (1987)

SUNDAY, AUGUST 7 PET-A-PALOOZA - There are kitties and canines who need loving na ‘ohana. Check out this special, weekly open house and find your new best friend. Free. 11:30am-2:30pm. Maui Humane Society, 1350 Meha Meha Loop, Puunene; 877-3680; mauihumanesociety.org

BOARDSWAP - Gather with other surfers to

- August is vampire month at Ambrosia! Sip stellar drinks and watch “The Lost Boys,” starring Kiefer Sutherland and Corey Haim. Free. 7:30pm.

Ambrosia Martini Lounge, 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 891-1011

DINNER MUSIC

buy, sell or trade boards every second Saturday of the month. 4-6pm. Local Motion, Lahaina Gateway, 305 Keawe St., Lahaina; 661-7873; lahainagateway. com

WEST MAUI

POI DOGGIE CONTEST - Show off your prizeworthy (non-pedigree) pup! See This Week’s Picks for more. Schaefer Gallery Lawn, MACC; One Cameron Way, Kahului; 242-SHOW (7469); mauiarts.org

COOL CAT CAFE - Every Thu, Junior & Oren 7:3010pm; Every Fri & Sat, Dave Carroll 7:30-10pm; Every Sun, Erin Smith 7:30-10pm; Every Mon, Peter D 7:30-10pm; Every Tue, live Jazz 7-10pm; Every Wed,

CANOES - Fri & Sat, Ras Shaggai 5:30-8:30pm; Sun, Indapkt 3-6pm. 1450 Front St., Lahaina, 6610937.

Ryan Palma 7:30-10pm. Wharf Cinema Center, Front St., Lahaina, 667-0908.

DA KITCHEN - Every Sun, Open Mic & Talent Contest 5:30-8:30pm; Every Mon, Magic Monday 6:30-8:30pm; Every Wed, Live Music 5:30-8:30pm.

Wharf Cinema Center, Front St., Lahaina, 661-4990.

DAVID PAUL’S ISLAND GRILL - Every Fri, Friday Nights in the Sky Lounge withDJ CIA 8pm-12am; Every Sun & Mon, Kama’aina Nights w/ Wolf 6-8pm.

900 Front St., Lahaina, 662-3000 DUKE’S BEACH HOUSE - Thu, Damien 3–5pm, Garrett & Peter 6–8:30pm; Fri, Garrett 3-5pm, Kulewa 6-8:30pm; Sat, Tim 3-5pm, Kulewa 6-8:30pm; Sun, Tim 3-5pm, Tim & Miles 6-8:30pm; Every Mon, Brian 3-5pm, Tim & Edee 6-8:30pm; Every Tue, Brian 3-5pm, Alika & Eddie 6-8:30pm. Every Wed, Brian 3-5pm, Alika & Ron 6-8:30pm. 130 Kai Malina Pkwy., Lahaina, 662-2900.

HARD ROCK CAFE - Thu, All-ages Open Mic Night 9pm; Fri, Sounds of Addiction 8pm; Sat & Sun, TBA; Wed, Damon Parillo & Danyel Alana 7:30-10pm. 900 Front St., Lahaina, 667-7400.

HULA GRILL - Thu, Alika 11:30am-1pm, Ernest Pua’a 1:30-3:30pm, Armadillo 4-6pm, Kulewa 6:30-9pm; Fri, Ernest Pua’a 11:30am-1pm, Kawika Lum Ho 1:30-3:30pm, 1810 4-6pm, Kawika, Roy, & Tarvin 6:30-9pm; Sat, Evan Schulman 11:30am1pm, Kawika Lum Ho 1:30-3:30pm, 1810 4:156:15pm, Wili Pohaku 6:30-9pm; Sun, Kawika Lum Ho 11:30-1pm, Ron & Ikaika 1:30-3:30pm, 1810 4-6pm, Derrick Sebastian Trio 6:30-9pm; Mon, Ernest Pua’a 11:30am-1pm, Kawika Lum Ho 1:30-3:30pm, Armadillo 4-6pm, Derrick Sebastian & Josh Kahula 6:30-9pm; Tue, Kawika Lum Ho 11am-1pm, Jarrett Roback 1:30-3:30pm, Damon

AUGUST 4, 2011 25

TheGRID

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY

08/04

08/05

08/06

08/07

08/08 - 08/10

FIND THE GRID ONLINE AT MAUITIME.COM/GRID OR TO HAVE YOUR BUSINESS ADDED TO OUR WEEKLY GRID SEND YOUR INFORMATION TO CALENDAR@MAUITIME.COM

SCOREBOARDS 1445 S. Kihei Rd. , Kihei -

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-6444

Haiku Hillbillys 6-10pm; no cover

Mango Pickers 8-11pm; no cover

Merv Oana 9pm-12am; no cover

Clay Mortensen 8-11pm; no cover

MON - Open Mic Night, 6pm-close / TUE Service Industry Night + Karaoke, 7-10pm / WED - Ladies Night feat. Blues Spirit of Maui, 8-11pm

DJ Slackin 10pm-close; no cover

DJ Gemini & DJ Ynot 10pm-close; no cover

DJ LX 10pm-close; no cover

Kanoa 10pm-close; no cover

MON - DJ Blast / TUE - DJ LX / WED Ladies’ Night w/ The ADD Twins (All sets 10pm - close; no cover)

Live Music 9pm-12am; no cover

Live Music 9pm-12am; no cover

Ladies’ Night / Karaoke 7pm-close; no cover

Live Music 9pm-12am; no cover

Free Pool / Karaoke 8pm/12am; no cover

Industry Night 10pm-close; no cover

MON - Mahalo Monday Industry Night, 10pmclose / TUE - Pau Hana Free Pool / WED - DJ Dance Party 8pm-12am

Ah Tim

“Models & Bottles” Fundraiser for Ocean Defender Hawaii, 9:30; $10

Karaoke w/ Pearl Rose 9:15pm-12am; no cover

Live Music 9pm-1am; $3

Karaoke w/ Pearl Rose 9pm-12am; no cover

Vince Esquire Band 8pm; no cover

Burlesque 9pm

The Throwdowns CD Release After Party w/ DJ N8 Castro, 10pm

Live Music

Live Music

Karaoke

Karaoke

Fashion Fusion 9:30pm-2am; no cover

SPORTS PAGE GRILL & BAR 2411 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-0602

STEEL HORSE SALOON 1234 L. Main St., Wailuku - 243-2206

STELLA BLUE’S

1279 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei - 874-3779

STOPWATCH SPORTS BAR 1127 Makawao Ave., Makawao - 572-1380

THREE’S BAR & GRILL 1945 S Kihei Rd., Kihei - 879-3133

TIA JUANA’S BEACH CANTINA 2291 Kaanapali Pkwy. - 667-4080

TIFFANY’S

1424 L. Main St., Wailuku - 249-0052

TIMBA

505 Front St, Ste. 212, Lahaina - 661-9873

THE UNDERGROUND 744 Front St., Lahaina

Next Level Entertainment 10pm

WATERCRESS

Waiehu Beach Center, Wailuku-243-9350

& Danyel Alana 4-6pm, Ernest Pua’a & Friends 6:30-9pm; Wed, Ernest Pua’a 11am-1pm, Alika 1:30-3:30pm, Peter DeAquino 4-6pm, Ernest Pua’a & Friends :30-9pm. Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pkwy., Bldg P, Lahaina, 667-6636.

JAVA JAZZ - Thu, Guest Performer; Fri, Tracy Stiles; Sat, Rick Glencross; Sun & Mon, The Chris and Mary Jane Xperiment; Tue, Ras Shaggai; Wed, Rick Glencross (all sets 7pm). 3550 L. Honoapiilani Rd., Lahaina, 667-0787.

KIMO’S - Thu, Fri & Sat, TBA; Every Sun, Mon, Tue & Wed, Sam Ahia 6:30-8:30pm 845 Front St., Lahaina, 661-4811.

LEILANI’S ON THE BEACH - Every Thu, Jarrett & Wilson 3-5pm; Every Sun, Kilohana 3-5pm. Whaler’s Village, 2435 Ka’anapali Pkwy. Bldg. J, Ka’anapali, 661-4495.

LONGHI’S LAHAINA - Every Fri, Fulton Tashombe and The Maui Jazz All Stars 7-10pm. 888 Front St., Lahaina; 667-2288.

MERRIMAN’S - Wed-Sun, Ranga Pae; Mon, (Phil & Angie Benoit will return next week!); Tue, David Choy.

All sets 6-9pm. 1 Bay Club Pl., Lahaina, 669-6400.

MOOSE MCGILLYCUDDY’S LAHAINA - Every Thu through Wed, Live Music. 844 Front St., Lahaina, 667-7758.

ONO BAR & GRILL - Thu & Tue, Benny Uyetake; Sat, Kealii Lum; Sun, Mitch Keppa; Wed, Scott Baird (all sets 6-9pm). Westin Maui Resort & Spa, 2365 Kaanapali Pkwy., 667-2525.

SEA HOUSE RESTAURANT - Every Tue & Fri, Kincaid Kupahu 7-9pm; Every Sun & Thu, Andrew Kaina 7-9pm; Sat, Coehlo Morrison 7-9pm; Every Mon & Wed, Albert Kaina 7-9pm. 5900 Lower Honoapiilani Hwy., Napili, 669-1500.

VILLAGE CAFE & SWEET SHOPPE - Thu, Joel

26AUGUST 4, 2011

Karaoke

Karaoke

MON through WED- Karaoke

Undone w/ Ross Q 9:30pm-2am; $10

Spun Out w/ DJ Calcul8 9pm-2am; $10

Closed

MON through WED - Closed

All-ages Nightclub 9pm-2am; $5/$10

All-ages Nightclub 9pm-2am; $5/$10

Live Music 10pm

Live Music 10pm

Free Karaoke

MON - Free Karaoke / TUE - Thirsty Tuesday & Free Karaoke / WED - Free Karaoke

AMBROSIA - Every Thu, Jamie Gallo & Friends 7pm; Every Mon, Cocktails for a Cause (this week benefits Maui’s SPCA) 8pm; Every Wed, Red Carpet Movie Night (August is vampire month! This week: “The Lost Boys”) 7:30pm. 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 891-1011.

BEACH BUMS BAR & GRILL - Every Fri, Tom Cherry & Mike F. 5-9pm; Every Tue, Randall Rospond 5-8pm. 300 Maalaea Rd. #1M, Maalaea, 243-2286.

ON MAUITIME.COM

LULU’S LAHAINA SURF CLUB & GRILL - Every Thu, Howard Ahia 6-8pm; Every Fri, Cyrus Clark 5-7pm; Sun, Kenny Roberts 9am-12pm; Every Mon, Junior 6-8pm. Every Wed, Kenny Roberts 5-8pm. Lahaina Cannery Mall, 1221 Honoapiilani Hwy. #A1, Lahaina, 661-0808.

TUE - Sushi Tuesdays w/ DJ CIA / WED - Stand Up Comedy Night

SOUTH MAUI

CALENDAR LISTINGS

WED - Live Music 8:30-11:30pm; $3 Gina Martinelli Band

Katz 5:30-8:30pm; Fri, Glenn Kakugawa and hula by his daughter, Sarah Kakugawa 5:30-8:30pm; Tue, Evan Shulman 6:30-9pm. 2000 Village Rd., Lahaina, 665-1122.

LOOKING FOR SOMETHING?

MON - Tom Cherry & Mike Finkewiecz, 4-6pm / TUE - Tom Conway, 4-6pm / WED - Randall Rospond, 4-6pm; SLAM feat. David Choy, 6-9pm

CAPISCHE? - Every Fri & Sat, Mark Johnstone 7-10pm. 555 Kaukahi St., Kihei, 879-2224.

HAUI’S LIFE’S A BEACH Every Thu, Jeff New; Every Fri, Mon &Tue, Rick Glencross; Every Sat, Ryan RobMon & Tue, Karaoke 8pm; Wed, Open Mic 9pm. 1913 S. Kihei Rd., #E, Kihei, 874-1250.

KAI WAILEA - Thu, Mon & Sun, Wolf; Fri, Ryan Robinson; Sat, Kanoa; Mon, Tom Conway; Wed, Francois (all sets 6-8:30pm). 3750 Wailea Alanui, Wailea, 875-1955.

LULU’S KIHEI - Every Thu & Fri, Live music and dancing; Every Sat, Easy Listening with Neto 8-10pm; Every Sun & Wed, Karaoke with Manino 7:30-11pm.

1945 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 879-9944.

MONSOON INDIA - Every Sat, Romantic Violin & Guitar Duets by Cambria Moss & Ricardo Dioso 6:30-8:30pm; Mon, Louise Lambert 6-9pm; Every Tue, Hula Honeys 5:30-8:30pm. 760 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 875-6666.

MULLIGAN’S ON THE BLUE - Thu, Murray Thorne 7-8:30 pm; Fri, Gail Swanson 6:30-8:30 pm; Sat, Alika Nako’oka 7-10pm; Sun, The Celtic Tigers 6:30-9:30pm; Mon, SLAM feat. David Choy & Clay Mortensen 6:30-9:30; Tue, TBA; Wed, Willie K 7-9pm. 100 Kaukahi St., Wailea, 874-1131.

PITA PARADISE WAILEA - Sun, (Phil & Angie Benoit will return next week!) 5:30-7:30pm. 34 Wailea

Gateway Plaza, Wailea, 879-7177.

9pm. 355 E. Kamehameha Ave., Kahului, 877-9001.

SCOREBOARDS - Thu, Haiku Hillbillys 6-10pm; Fri, Mango Pickers 8-11pm; Sat, Merv Oana 9pm-12am; Sun, Clay Mortensen 8-11pm; Mon, Open Mic Night 6pm-close; Tue, Karaoke 7-10pm; Wed, Blues Spirit of Maui 8-11pm. 1445 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei

CAFE O’LEI AT THE DUNES AT MAUI LANI Every Fri & Sat, Phil & Angela Benoit 5:30-8:30pm.

1333 Maui Lani Pkwy., Kahului; 877-0773.

SHARKY’S - Thu, Jordan Fun 5:30-9pm; Every Fri, Dress Like A Pirate Night 5:30-9pm; Tue, Karaoke Contest with DJ Jay 5:30-9pm. Lipoa Center, 41 E. Lipoa St. Ste. 15, Kihei, 874-5115.

SOUTH SHORE TIKI LOUNGE - Every Thu, Erin Smith; Every Fri, Randall Rospond; Every Sat, Tom Conway; Every Sun, Viva La Rumba; Every Mon, Kanoa; Every Tue, Sebrina Barron; Every Wed, Wolf. (all sets 4-6pm.) Kihei Kalama Village, 1913 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 874-6444.

UPCOUNTRY MAUI CAFE DES AMIS - Every Thu, Joe Conte plays The Chapman Stick; Every Sat, live Argentinian music; Every Wed, The Stone Violets 6:30-8:30pm. 42 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-6323.

FLATBREAD CO. - Every first Thu, Randall Rospond, :30-9:30. 89 Hana Hwy., Paia; 579-8989 KULA LODGE - Sat & Sun, Jazz music. 15200 Haleakala Hwy., Kula, 878-1535.

LOCAL MOCHA CAFE - Fri & Sat, live music 6-8pm.

81 Makawao Ave., Pukalani, 573-2859.

STELLA BLUES CAFE - Every Thu, Ah-Tim 4-6pm; Every Fri, Ahumanu 4-6pm; Every Mon, Tom Cherry & Mike Finkeiwicz 4-6pm; Every Tue, Tom Conway 4-6pm; Every Wed, Randall Rospond 4-6pm / SLAM feat. David Choy 7-10pm. 1279 South Kihei Rd., # 201, Kihei, 874-3779.

MOANA BAKERY & CAFE - Every Thu, Phil & Angela Benoit 6:30-8:30pm; Every Tue, Open Mic Night 6pm. 71 Baldwin Ave., Paia, 579-9999.

TAQUERIA CRUZ - Every Tue & Sat, live music Reggae, Jazz, Blues 5:30-8:30pm. 2395 S. Kihei Rd. #112, Kihei, 875-2910.

Post your free online listing (up to 15 months early), and our editors will consider your submission for the printed calendar as well. Print listings are also free, but subject to space limitations. Online, you can include a full description of your event, a photo and a link to your Web site. Go to mauitime.com/ listing and start posting events. Deadline for print listings is 10 days prior to the issue in which you wish the listing to appear.

THE RED BAR AT GANNON’S, A PACIFIC VIEW RESTAURANT - Thu, Fulton Tashombe & Special Guests 6-8pm; Tue, Braddah Larry Golis 6-8pm.

Wailea Golf Club House, 100 Wailea Golf Club Dr., Wailea, 875-8080.

THREE’S BAR & GRILL - Every Thu, Vince Esquire Band 8pm; Every Sun, Gina Martinelli Band; Every Tue, Sushi Tuesdays w/ DJ CIA; Every Wed, Stand Up Comedy Night. 1945 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei; 8793133 TRADEWINDS POOLSIDE CAFE - Every Thu, Island Favorites with Kawika Lum Ho; Every Fri, Girls Nite Out with Gina Martinelli; Every Sat, Classic Rock with Dominic; Every Sun, Ron Shadian & Friends; Every Mon, Bobby Ingram & Friends; Every Tue, Mike and Mark; Every Wed, Steve Sargenti. (all sets 6-9pm.) 2259 S. Kihei Rd., Kihei, 891-8860.

CENTRAL MAUI ALE HOUSE - Every Fri, Braddah Francis 4-8pm; Every Mon, Terri Garrison 4-7pm, Open Mic Night with Terri Garrison 9pm; Every Tue, Braddah Francis 4-7pm. Every Wed, Karaoke w/ Braddah Francis

LIST YOUR EVENT!

WAIT, THERE’S MORE! Looking for something to do? Use MauiTime’s free calendar to browse hundreds of events online. Art galleries, family events, education classes, film and literary events, church groups, music, sports, volunteer opportunities—all this and more on our free events calendar at mauitime.com/calendar.

Start planning your week!

Scan this barcode with your smart phone QR Scanner app to go to

THE A-TRAIN FRIDAYS 3-9PM K-ROCK 97.3

.com

FRIDAY AFTERNOON IS THE MOST POSITIVE, HOPE FILLED PORTION OF THE WEEK. SO HANG OUT WITH JOHNNY A AND SOAK UP THE GREAT VIBES, THE LAUGHTER, THE FREE STUFF, AND (OF COURSE) THE GREATEST ROCK AND ROLL EVER CREATED. AUGUST 4, 2011 27

HAWAII’S ONLY PROFESSIONAL

BASEBALL TEAM

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AUGUST SCHEDULE

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OPPONENTS: EDM= EDMONTON CAPITALS LC= COUNTY FIELDERS

VIP SEATING / $13 STADIUM SEATING / $9 GA / $6 MILITARY / KIDS 12-U / $4

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KULA KID

On The Radio

BY ANU YAGI Don’t be afraid to clutch the hand of your creator. / Stare into the lion’s eyes / and if you taste the candy / you’ll get to the surprise.

- Ween, “Don’t Get 2 Close (2 My Fantasy)”

O

ne of the many crossed wires wigglin’ ‘round in my noggin has made me susceptible to this: Whenever I have the good fortune of receiving an invitation to be on the radio, I instantly forget that every other time I’ve been on the radio I’ve subjected myself—and worse, any poor soul listening— to my awfully awkward radio presence.

This on-air amnesia is, assuredly, a disorder.

My guesting on the radio has happened a few dozen times over the last two years—one binge even lasted 20 consecutive weeks (on WiLD 105.5 FM’s “The Show”)—and over the course of that time I’ve had a crash course in How To Talk Into A Microphone 101; always with failing grades.

Somehow or another this landed me the chance to be a regular “co-host” (Johnny A’s words, not mine—promise!) on K-Rock’s The A-Train on 97.3 FM. And here I was under the impression that The A-Train’s a pretty good show.

So I’m on the radio. Making a fool of myself, as usual.

I’ve never done anywhere near six hours non-stop(ish) but I am now. We’re about three hours in and [insert ironic shoulder shake] I’m feeling loose, folks!

Johnny says, “Hey, I need a song.”

And like a dweeb, I’m all like “Oh, I’ve got a song for you, Johnny!”

On the edge of my forehead there’s a dull flash of cognizance that this is the very first song I’ve ever picked to play on the radio; but the anti-gravity-of-themoment machine’s on and this realization fades faster than it appears.

“I need it quick,” says Johnny. “What number?”

“Eighteen,” I beam as I hand him Ween’s Pure Guava.

Johnny asks me to lead-in, so I preface the song by saying, (now, I’m paraphrasing in efforts to mitigate my idiotic deluge), “I basically worship the gum stuck to Ween’s shoes. Seeing as this is my first night officially on The A-Train, I thought this might be a nice chance for you to get to know me by listening to one of my favorite songs by my favorite band. So here it is, [insert dramatic breath], ‘Don’t Get 2 Close 2 My Fantasy.’”

The song starts and instantly I realize my mistake. Ween is weird—that’s why I love them. But weird isn’t often

radio-friendly, and while “Fantasy” is a nonpareil rock anthem in my book, besides being a bit aberrant it’s got one glaring Achilles’ heel: Every line of the chorus cresendos—the cacophonic chorale’s cant intoned like a guttural hurdy gurdy—then dramatically cuts as if it’s the moment your stomach’s still left in the air as a roller coaster takes its plunge.

You know, artful pauses or whatever.

While good for the song, this equates to broadcasters’ worst nightmare: dead air.

Embarrassed, I stare dumbly as the mixing board’s meters rise then fall to zero. Everyone in the studio makes eyes with each other. I fear their blinks are Morse Code for, “Don’t let Anu back into the building.”

Maybe The A-Train crew is as afflicted with on-air amnesia as I am, because they let me back the following week and I’m hoping they’ll do so again this Friday (find out 3-9pm).

Considering my foibles, I don’t exactly have my hopes up. (Frankly, I just wanna stick around long enough to get a theme song by Abe’s Logic.)

Then again, there are worse things to worry over.

With heavy hearts and emptied ducts, the MauiTime ‘ohana mourns the loss of 28-year-old Kenneth J. Talbot III; one of our extended own. He died early Sunday morning (July 31) after reportedly losing control of his Kawasaki on Wailea Alanui Drive.

We’re privileged to have known Kenny as the buoyantly gregarious hanai brother of our former art director Chris Skiles, and hardworking R.N. at Maui Memorial Medical Center’s Heart, Brain & Vascular Center. In June of this year, he graced the cover of our annual Summer Guide; and it’s this proud, silhouetted-by-sunset image of Kenny that we’ll cherish as the placard to our many merry memories of him.

His passing marked Maui’s 11th traffic fatality of 2011. But when tragedy strikes so close to home and heart, it’s a sobering reminder that statistics have souls behind them.

Personally, I’ll remember Kenny as a hilarious conversationalist, an eager teammate in wholesome mischiefmaking, and a great buddy with whom to adventure. He was generous, candid to a fault (if there is such a thing) and was a better listener than I’m accustomed to enjoying.

We miss him.■

To read more Kula Kid with links and photos and stuff, and to leave comments, visit mauifeed.com/kulakid To share or save: mt.hy.pr/1507k

anu@mauitime.com

28 AUGUST 4, 2011

HOROSCOPE

Sign Language

BY CAERIEL CRESTIN

QUIZunderstood ANSWERS ...to questions on page 7

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18)

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22)

Leos are generally quite honest, but not always because of some unswerving moral certitude, but sometimes simply out of laziness and, to some degree, insensitivity.

You just can’t be bothered to tell a lie, since maintaining falsehoods requires tremendous energy, and besides, what’s the point? In this case, though, there may be a very good reason for covering up, or at least withholding, the truth. Try not to let your own ingrained and generally upstanding habits occlude that possibility. It’s rare when being deliberately ambiguous or benevolently dishonest are good ideas, but it happens—like this week.

Fair-minded as you are, it’s torturous when people in your life expect you to pick sides in a conflict that has little or nothing to do with you. This is, of course, a totally unreasonable expectation (whose injustice will not deter them in the slightest). Therefore, it’s up to you to draw that boundary line and stick to it, even if it makes you feel like you’re the one being ridiculous, not them. You’re not a villain for staying out of a fight— but one or more of those involved might try to make you think so. Be Switzerland and stay neutral, and if they really won’t stand for it, go to Switzerland—or somewhere equally far away.

1. E: Caldito never earned a high school diploma.

2. B: Decreased 22.3 percent from the number of filings in July 2010.

3. C: Difficulty in getting former County of Maui officials to act.

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22)

Just because someone is completely upfront about their shortcomings doesn’t mean you must put up with them. That’s not to say you should turn your nose up at anyone with failings; we’re all imperfect beings, after all. But honesty about those flaws does not equal a get-out-of-jail-free card. You should reserve the right to respectfully walk away from someone whose faults make them unworthy of you. However, be clear: if they’d slowly revealed this stuff over time, instead of spilling the beans all at once, would you react differently? If so, please allow that to influence how you choose to respond now.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20)

When a mix-up causes you to receive an unexpected windfall, come clean immediately, despite the greedy temptation to just keep your mouth shut and keep what you don’t really have coming to you. Sure, it’s okay to keep a $20 you found on the ground, but this isn’t exactly that, is it? Even if unlikely, it’s possible that this error will be fixed, and you’ll look like a greedy asshole when it comes out that you didn’t say a word. Coming clean immediately may sting in the short-term, but you’ll emerge from the situation smelling like roses and looking great—which will pay out its own benefits in due time.

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22)

Fixing a broken appliance is something you can do by yourself. Repairing a relationship, however, isn’t usually a solo job (unless you’re the main element that’s malfunctioning, a highly unlikely scenario). You need some cooperation to get this done; without it you’ll just be frustrated and not much further along than you are right now. Ask for the help you need. You may not want to let this go, but unless someone else is willing to put in the work and meet you somewhere near the halfway point, it’s a lost cause. Get that collaboration or get out, now.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19)

It’s annoying how some people, when they’re in crisis or simply feeling something passionately, expect you to drop everything and rush to their side to support them, or perhaps join in the fun. However, while it’s great when you can be there for a friend, this isn’t always possible. For you Rams, it’s almost impossible not to get caught up in the intensity of the moment, and most of the time that’s okay and even great. However, this time you need to keep your eyes on the big picture and recognize that rushing off right now would not be good for your overall agenda—so don’t do it.

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21)

Some people handle alcohol or drugs just fine, enjoying them recreationally with mostly inconsequential negative impact on their lives overall. Many others, however, can’t seem to keep things under control, and allow such activities to wreak havoc on the stability of their day-to-day existences. Unfortunately, Scorpios, with your magnetic attraction to extremes, tend to draw many such reckless and/or self-destructive types. You can’t do much about someone else’s tendencies, but you can control how much you empower such detrimental behavior. This week, be conscious of your contributions in this department, and if you discover you’re more instrumental in someone’s harmful habits than you’d like, make changes accordingly.

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21)

Being honest at all costs has indeed cost you dearly at times. I admire your determination to be upfront and forthright in all your dealings. However, as you know, sometimes this works against you more than for you.

People don’t always appreciate discovering what it is you have to share. Learning to bite your tongue at times has been an important lesson you’ve had to repeat more than once (or suffered through after screwing it up). This week you’ll get another chance or three to figure out when to speak up or shut up. Here’s hoping you get it right this time; if not, there’s always next time.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20)

Teenage certainty is charming—on a teenager. The conviction that a high school sweetheart is the love of their life is almost certainly unlikely to play out well, but the best we can do is try not to unload too much of our cynicism on their untested young hearts. However, when it’s a full-on adult who’s engaging in this kind of unrealistic naïveté, it’s best to say a little something. You don’t need to go out of your way to shatter their foolish dreams, and probably most of what you say will fall on deaf ears, but if your voice of reason is reasonable enough, some of it might sink in before they’ve gone too far down that path.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20)

It may feel like justice to you when cruel things happen to mean people, but I think you should try to muster up some compassion, anyway. Usually nasty people are only that way because they’ve already suffered tremendously; adding more misery to that pile isn’t justice—it’s quite the opposite. Yeah, this person is hard to like. But just think of how much a little unexpected kindness could mean to a person like that. Even if they’re incapable of showing gratitude in the moment (or ever), just think of your kind deeds as good karma and be glad you didn’t indulge the childishly vindictive side of yourself that was thinking, “Serves them right!”

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22)

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19)

You can pretend you’re confused about what the right thing to do is, but you’re really not. You know. The problem is you’re scared. That’s okay. Most people would be anxious in your shoes. That doesn’t mean you get to let yourself off the hook, though. You’d regret that later, I promise. You need to marshal your courage here and step up. Try not to think about the negative consequences (of which there’ll probably be a few), but instead of the positive results of your intervention, and the pride you’ll feel later, instead of regret.

Mahalo to our over 3,100 Facebook friends and counting...

Cancers can be snoopy busybodies. That’s fine, and I’m not judging you (much). However, this backfires when you discover something you really didn’t want to know; this could be something benign, like finding out about your surprise party, or something more harmful, like discovering your mother’s illicit extramarital affair— something you really wish you never knew. I’m not sure if you’re able to tone down the nosiness, even for your own good—other people’s business is so fascinating, after all!

However, if you can, this week would be a great time to try, for the sake of your own serenity.

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