in my church office, downloading a lot of porn videos off the internet, and I’m just completely unable to stop it.” I believe he’s sincere in his desire, but “I’m just completely unable to stop” is a statement of self-deception. Many people say they are unable to stop when their actual problem is completely different: they do not really want to stop. In reality it is possible to stop, but not without God’s help and a supportive community. If this pastor was being honest with himself, he would say, “I Many people say they am unable to stop because I am not are unable to stop when willing to deal with the consequences of my actions.” their actual problem is “My daughters give me a hug and completely different: they tell me they love me and they think I’m the greatest guy in the whole world. do not really want to stop. That hurts, but it’s still better than having two angry daughters cursing me for my porn addiction.” His daughters express love that is genuine, but Dad undermines the power of that love by not receiving it with truth and purity. Instead, he wants to keep up his lie forever and not get caught. This pastor has, like hundreds of other pastors addicted to porn, made a huge and arrogant error in judgment, betting he won’t make a wrong step. But all it takes is one mishap and his world will crumble. Then his loving daughters will have to deal with the sudden realization that their formerly great dad had been lying to them for years. A father’s betrayal always hurts more than a father’s failure. Yes, if this pastor came clean, it would hurt his family and break a lot of trust. It would take time to rebuild his family and 38
Ho w B a d I s I t ?
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