December Edition 2022 The Life Letter

LoveBird’s Letter

The last part of every year is centered around family. Thanksgiving jumpstarts the gathering of loved ones both near and far. Hopefully all of the Thanksgiving leftovers have been eaten as we enter crunch time for Christmas. Christmas carols are playing in the streets, red and green creates almost every scenery, and holiday shopping hits an all time high. For this reason, I have decided December’s edition will be dedicated to the family.

Family is a complicated yet beautiful construct. Some define family as their biological relatives they were born connected to by bloodline. While others look to a village they have created from themselves outside of their blood relatives. Unfortunately, there are others who have neither and their reality hits hard during this time of year.

My family looks like a conglomerate of all three. I have biological family I am very much connected to, as well as my in-laws. I also have created a village of people that stretches far and wide that are forever in my family. These people God has led me to and has ordained and confirmed our relationship. Along the way I have realized some people that were holding a space in my village were not qualified, and a stripping away had to take place. All in all, my circle is solid and stable.

And then there are people that I desperately wish could just visit for the holidays, but they are resting awaiting the coming of Christ. My father, my grandmother's, my aunt's and uncles and my beloved brother who I never got a chance to meet on this side. I long for them and that makes life difficult during this season. My saving grace is that God was intentional on how he built my family's timeline and I have peace now in knowing that he knows best. As hurtful as it is at moments, he loved me enough weave them in my life, and it served me well.

This time of year can be the most joyous or difficult time of the year depending on your family structure. No matter where you are, or who you belong or don’t belong to; I wish to encourage, enlighten, and inspire you to cherish what you do have. I even want to give you a small glimpse into my family life. I am elated to share with you in hopes you can implement or adopt some things from me for your family, and if not, hopefully it serves as a good read.

LoveBirdʼs Unpopular Opinion

My

Husband Gets

Served First

I know that this conversation has been going on for some time. Now that the noise has settled a bit I would like to give my two cents for anyone that is willing to hear. When I cook dinner, my husband gets his plate first. Keep in mind that I have a traditional marriage, in which I work within the home and my husband is the main provider for the family. So I have the time and space to cater to my home and family in ways that others do not.

Since my husband literally brings home the bacon, I honor his service to our family by serving him his food first. When i prepare a meal, I make all the plates at the same time. I serve my husband his food, and sometimes my children assist me in serving their father. It has become a gesture of love within our family.

There are many reasons why I serve him first. Firstly, he serves us by making a living to provide for us all. I see him sacrifice sleep, rest, and downtime often to ensure our needs are met and some of our desires are accessible. He also aids me with tasks within the home. There hasn’t been a week that has gone by, where my husband has not ran by the grocery store to pickup groceries and household items, so that I can tend to our children’s needs and other demands in the home. Especially in the winter, my husband is stellar at doing many of the household errands so that I won’t have to be out in the cold. He serves me, so its easy to serve him.

I take joy in serving him first because when he cooks, he serves me first. This act of service is reciprocated, thus becoming an exchange of humility for us both. We look for opportunities to honor each other, and this has laid a solid foundation for doing love. My husband and I believe that love is truly an action word, and not only something you feel. You must do love. There must be a performance or display of it, and this is one small way we do love.

Honestly, I love to see his face of excitement when I serve him. He truly appreciates it, every time. He acknowledges the presentation of the food, he compliments me on how i prepared the food. It brings me joy to see him enjoy his meals.

This is not something that my parents practiced. They were married my entire life and I recall more times my father serving my mother and his children. No one influenced me to do it, not even my husband. This is not an ideology I have adopted from others, but this is a principle I have come to appreciate for my marriage.

I think it is important to display to my children what honor and service looks like in everyday life. We as Christians harp on wives submitting, and yet there is little to no evidence on how to do so in day to day life. My daughter will have a clear healthy example of what submission requires, and what it looks like. My son will have an upfront view of what it takes to deserve a submissive wife, and have a blueprint on how to cherish such a gift.

My children don’t feel slighted. My children will always have enough. They are well fed and well loved. The only people that are upset that my husband gets served first are the people that have not yet had the privilege in living in such a secure home. I said that to say, when you are safe, secure and stable within your relationship, family and home, submission isn’t something to be afraid of. I am not fearful that my husband will not meet his end of the bargain, because he has proven that he can be trusted. My husband is not leery of being the main provider for the home, because I have proven I can truly be his help meet.

Once you see it from that perspective you can conclude it’s really not about who eats first. it is about who can you trust. It becomes a matter of who deserves the love and honor I have to offer? We talk about submission as if that is the greater command of the two. Christ commanded the husband to love his wife as Christ loved the church, that he would even lay down his life for her. The weight of that command goes overlooked. That level of sacrifice should be respected, and that level of mindfulness should be met with servitude.

Now if you don’t have someone in your life that is deserving of such, I can see why doing this small thing could be difficult. However, in my home that is simply not the case. For that, I am grateful to God for being mindful of me when he created my husband. I’m sure I can affirm that my husband feels the same way.

Ephesians 5:25

15 Phenomenal Christmas Gift Ideas

Need an easy thoughtful Christmas gift for someone special? When you run out of ideas, you can always choose from this phenomenal list!!!

1. Movie tickets for Christmas day. Going to the movies on Christmas is an ideal way to do something everyone can enjoy. Feel free to gift tickets to someone you would love to spend time with on this special day. It can even become a family tradition.

2. Small jewelry charm. Adding a special charm to a someone’s bracelet, can serve as a sentimental yet lovely gift. The key is to pick a charm that has special meaning to the recipient.

3. Decorative wreath. A unique and fun loving gift is to purchase a decorative wreath for gift giving. This gift idea is great for associates or people you may still be getting to know.

4. Holiday themed candles. Who doesn’t love a good candle? This is a simple and sweet gift for anyone. To make this even more special, find out the person’s favorite scent if possible or pair it with other small trinkets like a matching candle holder.

5. New best selling book in their favorite genre. This is perfect for any bookworm! Going the extra mile and getting a new best selling book would let the recipient know you are tuned in to their personal interests.

6. Gourmet dinner at home. When all other gift ideas fail, there is nothing like a special meal made with love. Creating memories should be the goal anyway right? Something that could elevate this gift even more is if you set up a cooking class with you as the instructor, what a wonderful way to bond with a loved one this holiday season.

7. Winter care package. Admittedly, getting a gift full of socks, shirts, underwear and such was underwhelming as a child. However, as an adult I would delight in this. You can get as creative as you want with this gift by personalizing it with special care items you know your person would use. Anything from socks, toiletries, new towels, soaps, and lotions can make up a perfect care package. Don’t forget a big bow!

8. Purchase a new membership. Now if you have extra funds to spare, pull out the stops in purchasing a new membership you know they would not only enjoy but have time to experience. Some great suggestions would be, spas, museums, editorial or magazine subscriptions, amusement parks, rock

climbing, golfing, the list goes on! Staying away from gym memberships are recommended as to not hurt anyone’s self esteem.

9. Buy them what they want. In the effort of giving the perfect gift we sometimes overlook the not so subtle hints our family and friends give us. Take a page out of my book and gift them with whatever they have been asking for. It doesn’t make the gift any less special because it wasn’t your idea.

10. Purchase the Plush. Plush pillows, plush robes, plush socks, plush blankets; they are all needed and sought after during the holidays. This kind of gift can be used much after Christmas is over. All plush items guarantee comfort, and no one can resist that.

11. Hallmark cards. Now, I am a card person. I have a folder in my file cabinet full of cards I received over the years. This is a perfect gift for someone who is sentimental. Add a little razzle dazzle with a nice gift card or cash!

12. The 5 senses gift bag. Now this gift is usually preserved for Valentines Day, but I think it can be great any time of the year. Find a special small gift for each of the five senses and watch your loved ones face light up. A gift for seeing, hearing, touching, smelling, and tasting. Use your imagination to bless someone’s Christmas.

13. Make a donation. This gift is for those selfless people that have a heart for others. Make a donation to a foundation or cause they are passionate about in their name. You can also, donate to an initiative, organization, or business they themselves have started. No matter the amount, the thought for these people is truly what matters. Another great idea is to help someone volunteer to serve others for the holidays.

14. The gift of music. I know this may not be considered a gift for some because of streaming services, but I would argue if done right this low cost gift could be the most impactful. Create a playlist and send it as a Christmas gift. Include some of their favorite songs, songs that remind you of them, and even songs you have shared together. Its cost nothing to making a dope playlist full of love and memories.

15. Invest in entertainment. This is for fun loving people that are youthful at heart, no matter the age. You can’t miss with giving a new board game or specialized card game, dart board, table hockey, Jenga, twister, or anything of the sort. This gift idea can bring back some feelings of nostalgia and excitement, which is perfect for a fun day inside.

Homesick Holiday by LoveBird

Have you ever been under the weather and longed for a bowl of soup from your mother's kitchen?

Have you ever faced something in life so big it made you question who authorized you to handle it?

Have you ever been somewhere you'd rather not be and daydreamed about the ways to escape to a safe place? Have you ever just wanted to go home?

Home for me is a few places. I have the esteemed pleasure of cultivating quite an abode for my family of four. I also can nuzzle up on the couch of a couple of my sisters to laugh, eat, rest, cry, and sleep. But there is a special home that will always be at the top of my list.

It's soft warm fragrance welcomes you as soon as you turn the doorknob. Sounds of joy pull you in as easily as the embrace only a mother could give. Spotting small changes in decor envelope you as you remember what was and wasn't there before. Recounting your steps as you go. Feeling a bit too toasty as old age has come upon the matriarch moving her to move up the thermostat a few degrees. Memories and Moments. All in one.

I wonder why we never call it daddy's house? Probably because only a mother's touch can create the space we will never not long for.

Have you ever just longed for a glimpse, a whiff, a hint, of home?

A place where you scraped your knees trying desperately to ride your bike without training wheels. A place where you ran up your mother's US Cellular phone bill because you couldn't wait til after 9pm to tell him how you really feel. A place you ate leftovers against your will, because we got food at home. A place where you grew, morphed and transformed into the semi functioning adult you are in this moment. Or is it just me?

Have you ever wanted to be 21, 15, 12, or 3 again?

Where life was simple and your big problems were easily solved. Where your existence heavily depended on the first representation of God. A time long ago, when you were coddled, carried and swept away from life's worries and troubles.

Have you ever just wanted to go home for the holidays?

How will you bring in the new year?

Photo of Inspiration

Where does all the excess go, after Christmas?

MEGG’S KITCHEN RECIPE OF THE MONTH

Buttermilk Cornbread

INGREDIENTS

1 cup self rising flour

2 cups self rising cornmeal

1 tsp. cooking oil

1 tsp. baking powder buttermilk

1 tsp. salt

1/4 cup white sugar 2 eggs

STEPS:

1. Pour all dry ingredients in a mixing bowl. 2. Slowly mix in buttermilk to create the desirable consistency. Start with 2 cups. Add as needed. 3. Add eggs and oil and mix throughly. 4. Continue mixing until ingredients are incorporated.

5. Pour mixture into a greased pan and bake on 350oF for 15-20 minutes or until golden brown.

6. Let cool, cut and enjoy!

In Loving Memory of Keith ‘Wonderboy’ Johnson LoveBird’s Christmas Song

Days of Christmas by Keith Johnson & The Spiritual Voices

A joyful middle grade novel based on the Netflix holiday film Jingle Jangle: about an eccentric toymaker, his adventurous granddaughter, and a magical invention, that if they can get it to work in time for the holidays, could change their lives forever.

Avoid Food Waste for the Family

In the coming weeks we all will have a surplus of food flowing through our kitchens. The holidays are on the horizon and Americans all over the country will be rushing to the grocery stores to secure every ingredient for their family dinners. The hunt for vanilla extract, the biggest bushels of greens, and finding the perfect turkey will push consumers into overdrive.

Oftentimes families throw away tubs of Tupperware riddled with spoiled food every week. According to feeding America 108 billion pounds of food waste is accrued in the United States. Which rounds out to be about 40% of all food production in the country.

One major factor being consumers being wasteful at home. Studies from Feeding America Network, the number one food rescue organization, have shown that 42 billion pounds of food is wasted in homes every year.

Before the holiday mayhem begins, here are some meal prepping strategies that will help curve these staggering statistics one household at a time.

Point 1. This is ideal for families that don't like to eat leftovers. At the start of every week, plan every dinner for every day. Add the dinner ideas to your planner or calendar. This may take a more effort to cook at home, but it also helps you grocery shop and prep food to cut down cooking time.

Point 2. Remix last night's dinner for tomorrow's lunch. This is easier said than done, but it is a sure way to get rid of any leftovers and save a few dollars at the same time. For example, making a burrito bowl out of last night's taco night ingredients ensures that all the food gets eaten.

Point 3.

Get creative! Google the ingredients you have at home and see what recipes pop up. You'd be surprised at how many cool new dishes you can make from what's already in your cabinets and pantries. Casseroles and soups are ideal dinner options for this strategy.

Point 4. Cook in smaller portions. If there is always too much food after dinner and Tupperware is running low, chances are the portions are too big for the family. Try cutting down on how much food you prepare and see how clean your fridge stays.

by: LoveBird

Point 5. Pack up the extra and take it to the streets. Many of us won't have to go far to find someone in desperate need. Instead of waiting until the food goes bad, make it a gesture of kindness for someone else.

Point 6. If you don't mind eating the same thing two or three times, you might as well jump on the meal planning bandwagon. Meal planning helps save money, time and relieve the headache of always trying to answer the question what's for dinner.

Bonus tip: Ensure that your protein, carb, and vegetables are healthy proportion to maintain a more balanced diet. New rule of thumb is vegetables should be half of your plate.

Point 7. Simply don't buy anything new if you have something at home. This is the hardest tip and calls for the most discipline. All in all avoiding food waste is a choice we all must be committed to stopping.

Point 8. Only buy in bulk things you regularly run out of in the fridge and pantry. If you don't eat sweet peas often, there is no reason you should have ten cans stuffed in your pantry. Buy what you really like in bulk. And He said to them, “Take heed, and beware of covetousness, for one’s life does not consist in the abundance of the things he possesses.” LUKE 12:15 NKJV

Dear Lord,

We thank you for allowing us to witness the holiday season yet again. We thank you for carrying us all year. As we prepare for the new year, God I ask that you cover our families. Rebuke the devour for our sake and help us to overcome the battles you foresee in the coming months. We recognize that life wonʼt be perfect, but God give us the strength and strategy to cultivate a great life for our families and ourselves. We recognize nothing is impossible with you so we look to you for all things in this moment and in moments to come.

In Jesus Name, Amen.